#but i feel like such an old man regardless
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incredible, i just saw a reblog of that "transfem headcanons are always better and sometimes transmasc headcanons actively make the text worse and more hateful" by someone i followed. funny to see discussions arguing against the post before seeing the post itself, otherwise i would have unthinkingly internalized it and felt like shit without knowing why. anyway, i unfollowed that person now. to make it worse, op tore into someone for claiming that chihiro from danganronpa is an exception and better read as transmasc... the irony is insane. yet another example besides miquella that would make the story more boring and maybe worse if transfem.
it's so disgustingly petty lmao
a lot of transfem headcanons are reaches, often "this is literally a man magically trapped in the body of a woman and he hates it and desperately keeps trying to go back to being a man" and it's FINE to headcanon characters however you want but since some people can't conceptualize being a woman as anything other than something they wish would happen to them they take characters like that and hiss if you go near them
i get the sense that there's a very specific, narrow demographic of transfems who used to buy into that reddit guy "being a hot 22-year-old girl must be like having 10 billion dollars" attitude and never really let it go. thus the fixation on "AFAB privilege". isee a similar mix of resentment and attraction from lesbian TERFs, though it comes from a different origin. and it's an attitude that can slide easily into TERFism even for cis men--just look at tatsuya ishida!
If anything the idealization of femininity a small minority of transfems exhibit when they complain endlessly about how good trans people AFAB have it would come more from dysphoria and the grass being greener on the other side. "An AFAB trans person will immediately revert to being an innocent little girl to hurl sexual assault accusations at trans women," however, is really concerning!
Regarding whether "binary privilege" exists, i am once again on my hands and knees begging people to actually look at the statistics. The US Transgender Survey and Cohnting Ourselves (from Aotearoa) are right there. And they both show that all trans people are about as badly off as each other regardless of their specific gender. Yes, there are some ways in which being nonbinary is particularly hard, such as not having a social role to fit into, I'm not denying any of that, but if you're going to call being binary a "privilege" then there needs to be a visible whole-group effect for binary people compared to nonbinary people. And there isn't one when you look at the numbers.
It's not really about non-binary people having it flat worse, more just situational complexities.
The thing about even discussing privilege (binary privilege in this case) is that so many people talk as if to have privilege means to inherently have privilege Over someone else. Like is it an advantage for me to be vaguely binary alligned enough sometimes to have a legal gender marker that is moderately less dysphoria inducing when some people are equally harmed by either? (Tbf I live in a state where x is an option, I simply do not feel safe with that 😵💫 (tho that does not help when nothing else other than state id accepts it)) like yeah it's a privilege but it's not privilege Over someone. It does not make me an oppressor or mean I am causing harm, which is a thing many people seem to believe, about various forms of privilege
That's a very good point, anon.
I suppose this isn’t how others I’ve seen think about it but. I’ve always just understood that you can be oppressed for being trans without your gender being affirmed. Like. The bigots understand you’re trans but that doesn’t make them think of you as your gender it makes them think of you as trans. Misgendering is such a huge part of what transphobes do and I’ve never once assumed they were like. Lying about seeing trans people that way. I don’t get acting like transphobes can see our, as you put it, soul gender.
It makes people feel better.
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https://www.tumblr.com/genderqueerdykes/770233758623449089/people-are-completely-okay-with-sheher-gays-but
I think it’s so hurtful that people can just be like that in general, like both aren’t a threat, like it is perfectly valid, I think even not from a lesbian/gay perspective that men who use she/her and women who use he/him are so often ridiculed and yeah it’s just disgusting.
Pronouns don’t dictate gender, I think some people need to get that in their head, like that he/him lesbian can be the most feminine person but they feel like he’s a threat because “he’s stepping into where he shouldn’t” and it’s just exhausting or get this he is a man who identifies as a lesbian, I think people get so tied in dichotomies that the concept of being he/him lesbian and she/her gay is so vast.
I am both to an extent even though I don’t use the terms for myself and don’t want people to say that I’m that as well, but I think it’s so complex that being concerned about someone using pronouns that’s “not typical of their gender” is just a bullshit move.
agreed! people are really struggling to grasp that pronouns do not dictate gender. like it genuinely can be anyone of any identity, regardless if they're masc or fem, who uses a given set of pronouns. a he/him lesbian doesn't have to be butch or masculine at all, like you said. he can be the most femme person in the room and his pronouns still need to be respected. she/her gays can be butch as fuck and deserve to be gendered correctly despite how some may think that doesn't "make sense"
pronouns are literally just grammatical particles. of course they have a lot of meaning to the individual, but at the end of the day, they really say nothing about a person aside from the fact that they enjoy when that set of pronouns i used for them. i agree that it's bullshit. i don't know why people are so focused on misusing other people's pronouns but it's so old. it's such a dumb thing to get petty over. it's so shitty to assume someone identifies a certain way just because they're using a set of pronouns
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usually I mind my own business, but occasionally I see some new fan posting meta-adjacent thoughts and decide to add my two cents, and it ALWAYS feels like this
#my perception that is…#they’re always either really polite and engaged or ignore me completely which is their right#but i feel like such an old man regardless#people i REALLY disagree with bc i feel like they’re analyzing the show in bad faith get blocked#so i realize there’s probably a ton going down in the tags that i don’t see#but what i have seen lately has been interesting#i don’t always agree but it’s nice to see some cracks at novel meta concepts#rather than just the same points rehashed over and over again#i can appreciate that
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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Late(ish) at night gman ramblings time
Honestly I have yet to find a popular theory as to what Gman is that actually feels like. right to me. Like some of them are neat ideas, if put into something fan made, but if it turned out to be canon, most of the outcomes i've seen feel like they'd be super disappointing, in my opinion of course.
I've seen theories about Gman being a Shu'ulathoi that shapeshifted into a humanoid form, and while the idea is novel, I honestly feel as though it. limits him too much. It removes the mystery aspect of him because now we know what he is, and what his motivations are. Like, if Valve ever truly confirmed that Gman is some sort of alien species that we can easily pinpoint, or even one we've seen before, it would feel like it's putting gman in a box that doesn't fit him.
To me, Gman is best left unknowable. He is a species that only has one member (maybe), he doesn't have a set true (or at least comprehensible) form, but he's definitely not human. He doesn't have a name, he has no set species that aligns with anything we have seen so far. An eldritch entity that is outside what we have observed within the Half Life universe. As much as I would love to learn more about Gman, I also fear the mystery of him being removed and overall making him feel less like a cosmic threat.
Overall I don't personally think most of the theories explaining what he could possibly be are correct for him. He is nothing, yet everything at the same time. True ambiguity.
#ramblings :)#gman#g-man#personal opinion. Absolutely no hate if you like some of the fan theories#Just putting my two cents out there since. I'm not a huge fan of most of them personally#Hell I don't even think he has much of a past. not one that's super clear.#He's always been like this. Always looked like an old businessman. was never young#And before he got his human disguise I think he was just. somewhere in the outskirts of the universe. waiting.#Also I really don't want the employers to be explained or shown.#They should stay this. presence that looms but you never truly see it or understand it#That's the main thing! I don't WANT Gman to be understandable.#Give me eldritch old man!!! Give me cosmically horrifying entity in false human skin!!#give me something we've never encountered before!!!#I dunno. it's just where most of Gman's horror comes from. How vague he is#And how you can never truly understand who or what he is and what he's planning and why.#Something clearly feeling claustrophobic in the human form but pushes through it regardless just to fool you.#But is he even really trying to fool you? I imagine he knows just how unbelievable as a human he is the second he starts talking and moving#Maybe he just wants you to feel deeply uncomfortable around him. Better to pressure you into a deal#Like thinking about how he circled around Alyx in HLA like some sort of predator animal.#Rambling but you get what I mean i hope
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I've started playing Potion Permit, and so far it's one of my favorite games I've messed around with, but the most big brained move the devs made was giving you a dog on day 1, and then making that dog able to track NPCs and lead you directly to them no matter where they are in the town.
#im still early game but i like the play and the writing is passable#like#Theres a flatness#the characters Are distinct but theyre mostly just their jobs#with only a few who stand out and have like. something to really grab onto#Like rue? rues entire deal is little girl you can date. Nothing else behind those eyes. She has nothing better to talk to you about#than the fact her favorite color is red#Sorcelia? Sorcelia is a goth nun who loves singing and teaches one of the village children#Reynerd? sure is a guy#got nothing else to say about him. hes just a Guy™. Victor? Has ghost friends and loves bugs and cares deeply about the cemetery#he tends to. At the moment it feels like they're trying to imply there aren't actually ghosts. and hes just talking to himself/#insisting his imaginary friends are real people#and so far? The games been cool about it. Victor's a member of his community and his eccentricities are accepted and not ridiculed#all four characters ive mentioned are romance candidates. but its just as hit or miss with the regular towns folk#Opalheart is an older woman and a world renowned blacksmith who only takes jobs if they will do Good. regardless of whether or not they#pay well. She declines to make a dagger for a rich man but makes a helmet for a childs father bc the girl asked#and olive is here#anyways you can be best friends with a cat (shes just a regular cat) and i appreciate that#idk im putting it above sun haven in my ranking of life sim games#purely because there are older romance candidates.#no fat romance candidates. but sun haven doesn't have thise either.#and sdv has neither fat or old candidates Nor can you fuck a cat boy. it goes at the bottom.#gameplay wise sunhaven is at the bottom then sdv then potion permit at the top. sunhaven has the Most™ but having#a lot of crap doesn't mean its fun and it ends up making half the game feel really incomplete#idk. Sdv is a game you should've started playing a year ago. sun haven is a game that perpetually needs another year worth of updates#before id say its worth it bc the devs keep pushing content ™ updates instead of quality of life or polish so what is there is uh#Bad. plentiful. and a large portion is good#but a Lot is just bad.#its insincere and cant take itself seriously it gives you (the right dialogue option) an (the shit joke option) which is worse than just#i ram out of space. tldr. potion permit is good Now. sdv Was good. sun haven Might be great Eventually
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I'M HERE AGAIN HELLOO HIIIIII :D
question about vandermorgan cuz I'm curious....
do you have any headcanons and how do you see their relationship?
They say a picture is worth a thousand words
#DVL and AMs relationship being a toxic feedback loop built on DVLs dependence on AM and AM seeing DVLs validation as something he needs#it's completely ripe for abuse. AM feels devalued by DVL but consistently puts him and his wants above all else and DVL takes and takes#because he needs his followers and sycophants and dreamers and sons and daughters and lovers and soldiers to make him more than what he is.#He thrived on AMs blind loyalty because it allowed him to indulge his own vain ideal of a rebellious leader championing his idea of freedom#and america and a mans own right to live his life however he pleased when he had someone else willing to die behind it.#I know it's touchy for some but the father/son aspect of their relationship regardless of it serving as another form of control reward and#punishment can't be ignored or minimised. DVL was a patriarchal figure not just to AM but the gang which impacted how they both tried to#define their relationship. It's boring to brush it away to sanitise their dynamic when taken to a romantic/sexual context. GET FREUDIAN NOW#They're like kitten daddy is going to kill himself if he doesnt get his tahiti money 🥺🥺🥺 If you loved me you'd get me a mango farm🥺🥺#Well that's the gist of it... and regarding your other ask: Nah I'm a native English speaker. I don't post art terribly often but thanks! I#want to redraw that old drawing at some point. Idk about good vibes but I'm pretty horizontal if were talking abusive cowboys.#asks#vandermorgan
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Hima, make a comic in which Romania isn't with Bulgaria 24/7 challenge.
#hetalia#hws#aph#I like robul#but when am I gonna get Ro interacting with other characters man?#aph romania#hws romania#it has become wishful thinking to want more magic trio content at this point?#I feel like Ro has been reduced to Bul's emotional support vampire/“best friend”#that's cool but it's getting old lately#someone had to say it sorry#I'll still enjoy future robul content if that's all I'm gonna get regardless
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How do you feel about Dungeon Meshi (i think i spelt that right) getting more popular? I feel like i’ve only seen u post about it but now its popping up a lot more on my twt / tiktok
Mixed feelings! Glad it has an anime now and that ppl are enjoying it, because its really good!
I myself think its annoying when ppl are like "im gatekeeping x media bc its important to me 😡" so thats not how I feel on the other end. It has impacted lots of ppl so if it can get a bigger reach and impact more, thats good. ^_^
if i did not have the time or energy or resources to read it, I would've hated feeling alienated just bc it became a favorite media of mine after the anime came out
Its more like. Idk.
I know ppl who hope it gets Bigger for more official merch but I just don't want it to get Embarrassing ykwim.
I need it to not get so popular that in a few years I'm hiding the volumes from my shelf because its an embarrassing, beat to death thing thats present in every store, backpack, socks, sweater that looks like characters clothing, funko pops, etc. something i cant even enjoy anymore bc its been wrung dry and overexposed and misinterpreted, "of course u like it EVERYONE likes it!" and now I'm tired of it, and wouldn't want ppl to associate me with it LOL 🧿🧿🧿
#anonymous#skunk mail#its like how i do enjoy jjba but id never wear merch out bc what if some fandom poisoned man makes a kakyoin doughnut#joke to me. which happened in college when any mention of it came up#or like how. (insane evil hater mode) when i see people really into BNHA or SNK still im like 😬#can u imagine if those were somehow your favorite series' in the past and now someone who doesnt even go there feels weird about it For You#when you mention it being your fave. LMFAO. i recognize that'll happen regardless due to ppls tastes but ykwim!!! fandom poison!!#the subreddit has already started with unfunny memes 😭#AND already started with ''um but my shipping??? my Het shipping why no het people shipping?? why no het Canon ship??''#ok this is the other hater part that sounds like the ''im gatekeeping this thing thats already popular 😡'' crowd#and im already sorry for the wording im gonna use but you KNOWWWWW the type.#i need it to not ever be on the list of anime that harry potter GOT loving normies my age list as their fave 😭😭😭#SORRY. this is why i cant interact with jjba bc i know my harry potter loving old friend's husband loves it#or like how my friends boyfriend balks at any mention of ''gay shit'' in it. YKWIMMMM. DONT LET IT GET THIS COMMON#we cant let it get to ''i love marvel movies disney harry potter GOT and [ANIME]!'' status 😭 SORRY.#I need it to get so popular they release a thistle figure im already saving for just in case. But not marvel funko pop lover popular. 😭
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redux of an old stupid thing
#my art lol#my ocs#lucian#spencer#aurelio#shitpost#i just wanted to test out this comic format lmao and couldn't come up w/ anything new#man i really gotta get the new refs for all these bitches in line but ughghhhhhh#the old version of this is somewhere on here if you go digging around i think. but i dont feel like linking it#bc my old art brother eughghhhh#this is still so funny to me tho regardless of how stupid it is. none of these bitches live long enough to see the microwave be invented#or well maybe aurelio would but then that makes this funnier lmao. bitch hates that thing for no good reason. 'back in my day' type shit#except that was like literally a fucking century ago. 😭 my guy let it goooo.
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So I have to pay Charon to be able to actually skip the cutscene? Or can’t it be skipped? I don’t wanna have to pay his ass cause my demons are usually dead, unless he brings me back when I last saved so my demons are still alive. Don’t wanna be revived if my demons are still dead…
Very bad luck with negotiations ~~~~
Damn it mokoi. Should’ve recruited you before napaea…. Last death was fu xhi (?) the old fart
At least you can get stuff sometimes if you have a demon and try to negotiate with them anyway. Got a medicine from a napaea but idk if I died afterward or not. Probably did based on the way stuff goes.
Much less upset about game now~~~
Leveled up to level 3 and dumped 3 points into magic, and 2 into luck. Probably should’ve went agility but eh. Saved so hopefully I stay there.
Which Burroughs apps are useful? Or just play and find out?
I’m an smt newbie and the constant posting like this is obvious, lol. Sorry for all the questions and meaningless updates ~~
I’m waiting to accidentally pay him cause I mash through charon’s text. What happens if I do? Wanna find out but not lose anything due to failed negotiation…
I guess if my demons died I’d need revival beads? Or do what crystaahl does and fuse new demons. But I don’t even have access to the cathedral yet.
Opposite of crystaahl’s just jump in attitude. Her let’s play stream is cool and she got way farther than me much faster… course she’s played nocturne and 5, and iv is my first smt game.
Sorry for stupid updates ~~
Feel like an old man I’m playing so slowly ~~~ trying to be very careful and meticulous with resources cause they seem really limited currently…..
Update: Bufu on Flynn let’s go ~~ need to summon napaea from stock to level her up to get dia but she dies so fast~~ shouldn’t have used a revival bead cause I only had one…. Rip being efficient with resources. T_T;;
#personal#thoughts#thinking#I’m a newbie and these posts are making it very obvious#newbie#to these types of games anyway#but we all start somewhere#so don’t get discouraged huh?#shin megami tensei#smt#shin megami tensei iv#smt iv#negotiation fails#lol#much less upset about it now tho#just trying to not mash through his text so fast I accidentally pay Charon#negotiations really don’t make sense sometimes#fun game#feel like an old man cause I’m playing it very slowly still#wanna get napaea to whisper dia to Flynn in case she dies again so I have it regardless#and I guess don’t feel like I’m playing incorrectly cause we all play at our own pace huh#lost in naraku#not really#I’m just staying near the entrance and trying to recruit things and maybe grind for resources#wonder if anyone even reads the tags?
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y'know, excited as I am to be playing in a new sandbox and getting to know a whole new cast of colorful characters (as well as making new characters and seeing how they interact with- and are shaped by the story), I've honestly just been feeling so emotional about getting to see my Inquisitor again. specifically about maybe, potentially, getting to see him interacting with Dorian again.
I spent the better part of a decade (on and off) with that guy roaming around in the back of my head, I had almost resigned to never really seeing him again by the time I made him in BG3 as a fun little AU, but now that there's FOR SURE a new game coming, and there's a REAL CHANCE that the both of them will show up again, I just....
I really want to know for certain that those two truly do get the happy ending they so deserve.
#squirrel plays dragon age#oc: raymond trevelyan#and yeah; i don't really think they'll do the traditional “marriage” thing or ever really entertain having kids or anything#because not only is the whole thing not their style; not really#but also gl;hf finding a Chantry that would recognize a marriage between a Marcher nobleman and a male member of the Magisterium#that's also one of the founders of the abolitionist; opposition party???#they'll cross him at every opportunity just to annoy him; i guarantee#that being said; if the game chooses to subtly shift “amatus” to “maritus”; i would not be mad at all#dare i say; i'd cry very real crocodile tears regardless of whether it's factual or just a sweet thing to say#i'm thinking that in my personal world “vir meus” would be something Dorian would say more often and with more gusto#“maritus” is “husband”; but “vir meus” i believe can kinda be understood as both “my husband” and “my man”#or. well. “man mine”; but that's just how latin kinda works#that feels more like how i see them in my head#Ray is mostly “amatus” and “vir meus”; Dorian is primarily “sweetheart” and “treasure”#and all is right with their little corner of the world#until great forces decide to toss the inquisitor at horrors both old and new huh
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God I wish I didnt get ostrasised by all but like 4 of my peers because holyfucking shit am I overworked and need a hug
#why cant everyone just be nice like for fucking real!!!!#so sick and tired of looking like Mother Theresa compared to my coworkers bc i do the bare minimum of making the residents feel cared for#like girl we are working with the same cast and crew#will never forget the time a cna came in and after telling them 'hey that guy will get seizures if you give em that' and they replied with#'well they get seizures regardless' AND LEFT#EVIL!!!!!!#andlike#i understand that not everyone has the same memory capacity/ability but oh my motherfucking god#if everyone around me is at baseline then i must be either God or the absolute perfect person#which is saying something bc ive genuinely killed quite a few braincells with my former [redacted] addiction but here i am#knowing the smallest things about everyone that makes em happy#and the thing is is that I WORK IN THE KITCHEN!!!#IM NOT A CNA/RN WHO AT ALL HOURS OF THEIR SHIFT WILL BE INTERACTING WITH THE RESIDENTS!!!#idk man if i were generally mentally n physically well in my 30+s AND gettin outshined by a 21 year old for the past 2 yrs id be embarrasse#cannot fucking wait for my mom to get a job so i can leave mine and take a break#tony speaks#and before anyone says 'the CNAs are overworked and some of the residents can be overwhelming!'#the residents know im nice so they come to me for fucking EVERYTHING!!!!#ESPECIALLY the overbearing ones!!!#AND ON TOP OF THAT I HAVE LITERALLY EVERYONE. STAFF AND RESIDENTS.#ASKING ME WHATS GOING ON WHEN IM BALLS DEEP IN THE AM AIDES BULLSHIT ON TOP OF THE MORNING COOKS#not only do i ghostrun the kitchen but im the guy everyone goes to for everything. regardless of department#im literally a kitchen aide with no further qualifications leave me the fuck alone and ask your superiors/managament FUCK!!!!!!!!
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i love vander truly i do but when i think about the fact he gave vi every complex she's got i get a little upset with him
#not mad just disappointed sir#like that man really did project all his feelings of guilt and leadership responsibility#onto the orphaned parentified 15 yr old girl in his care#and OBVIOUSLY he wasn't meaning to he was just trying to do general parent discipline#and sometimes in parenting you fuck a kid up on ACCIDENT.#like i understand him he really was just trying to basically tell her hey quit doing dumb shit please#bc your siblings follow you around like ducklings and if you do dumb shit they're going to do dumb shit regardless#and doing dumb shit has consequences nobody likes#but also. “whatever happens to them it's on you who are you willing to lose?” (<- last big convo she had with him before the incident btw)#and then within like 3 days she's lost her entire family#BECAUSE of a failed heist that SHE orchestrated. like. and she had 7 years in prison to do nothing but sit with that guilt#definitely exacerbated by the shit he said to her. truly obscenely diabolical
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been thinking about how weird i have been feeling about the king's cancer diagnosis. and i had been wondering, 'am i wrong for feeling strange and sad about this when the family at the heart of it are the centre of this awful system?'
and i think that, actually, this is just another part of what makes the system terrible. of course it is, first and foremost, exploitative of the people - of the united kingdom, of the wider commonwealth, of the many other places which were touched by the british imperial project. but it is exploitative also of the people around whom it is designed. for whom a cancer diagnosis is not a private tragedy, but a public affair. whose actions and appearances are noticed, reported, scrutinised. what does this mean for harry and william's relationship? - where is the king staying during his treatment? - how is he going to meet with the prime minister?
nobody wins, i think, while the royal family remain royal. certainly some are losing more severely than others. charles will have access to the best possible care for his condition while millions languish on nhs waiting lists. but this doesn't feel like any sort of victory to me.
#i very much understand why people hate not just the institution but also the individuals of the royal family#doubly so those whose backgrounds mean that comparatively recent royal history has had a tangible negative impact on their community#(which i don't feel is the case for me as a middle class white scot)#and it is certainly fallacious to claim that 'he's just an old man; he could be your grandad!' or whatever.#but for myself personally i prefer not to lose sight of the fact that they are *people*.#of course they're not 'just like us' - but they could have been. and the fact that they never had that chance or choice is#another failing of the system. not the *primary* problem - but symptomatic of much much deeper and broader issues.#and anyway. on a shallower level. i think i just find it hard to find much glee in cancer regardless of the context.#this post won't even show up on my own dashboard because i have the term blacklisted.
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#idk why i’m even talking about this but like. treating this blog like my diary#thinking about the cody ko controversy & the response of the internet in general & it’s so weird#like i watched cody but i unsubbed a couple years ago just bc i didn’t like his vids anymore but i did like tmg & their music & noel#which isn’t the weird part because i’ve parted with things that turned sour & problematic etc. there’s a little bittersweetness but not muc#the weird thing is just how people have responded (cody hasn’t which speaks for itself 🧍)#like some people take it seriously but there’s also been a lot of jokes. which i would argue is okay because it’s clowning on the abuser—#& it spreads a wider rhetoric of ‘hey this guy sucks let’s all make fun of this guy for committing statutory’#it’s strangely validating as someone with my trauma#ofc i’ve talked about it before but as someone who was groomed & sa’d at 17 by a 22 year old man i remember constantly (even still)#second guessing how bad it was & arguing that like ‘4.5 years isn’t that bad’ or ‘well the SA was ‘only x’ and not ‘y’’#even though i feel a lot of nuance about the concept of. this is being treated seriously while simultaneously being treated as the—#joke of the week & so many people have said that he won’t face consequences (it seems like these influencers never do)#even despite all that…there’s a strange validation of my trauma whenever i see other people speak out and gain support regardless of the—#circumstances.#idk does that make sense or am i talking in circles#tw grooming#tw sa mention
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