#but i dont have time to do it atm so maybe in two weeks? if uni allows it

[faaun]

ok let's catch up quickly

[nicadilly]

Edit: tfw when u create a fair amount of fanart for the author and commish a 40$ fic only to be mistreated and never get ur money back lol. Got a refund :) Wish the emotional anguish thing never happened but ill heal. They also gaslight on the reg so keep that in mind. if someone told me back in January 2022 i would become an amogus fan/simp for MEN i would laugh. YET HERE WE ARE.

Some of the main characters from @crinklytinfoil ‘s series that is currently causing severe brainrot. @krysmcscience is to blame bcs if it were not for their fanart i wouldnt know abt the fic oops... (also it is a dead dove fic so check it out at your own discretion!)

OH almost forgot about my obligatory “THIS IS NOT THE ARCANA???”

[phagodyke]

ykw actually I am angry + disappointed w them. I've been pushing how I feel aside and trying to make it my own fault so it's all contained but I think theyve just been mean. and they really should know me better ik I try to pretend I don't expect more from them so I feel less hurt when they do things that upset me but we've been friends for years by this point. like come on.

[miss-ery-3]

ughhhh, i don't want my blog to turn into some kind of relationship-crybaby-blog, but i do have a lot to think about atm

i dont really have anyone to talk with about this. all my friends are in happy relationships and dont really seem to take any other stance than "you cannot break up" and that just really isnt helping me

buuuut, if you aren't interested in my personal (non-ed) issues, just scroll on<333 no hard feelings

so, for now, i'll just type this into space and hopefully get some kind of catharsis i guess

it's currently 1 am and i am in my childhood bedroom and i can't sleep. my head feels like it is fucking spinning. every thought in my head is "why do i feel like this? if i feel this bad should i just stay with him? but do i actually feel in love with him anymore? it's not fair to continue being with him, if i don't actually want to. would i miss him? would i regret it?" and then just in a big ol' loop

mixed with thoughts of my friend i talked to all of friday night. his face has popped up in my head constantly since i went home at 7 am from being with him all night. i feel fucking butterflies in my stomach, and get all giggly, and i want to say his name out loud for some strange reason - until i think about what these fucking butterflies mean and then i feel sick to my stomach and want to throw up. every butterfly i feel is like taking a step away from my bf, and i literally cannot control it

i feel like an absolutely horrible person, fuckk,brnfjkgnkmrf

'cause i also keep thinking about all the things my bf have done that hurt me (i guess, to make myself feel better?? but it makes me feel a whole lot fucking worse. both because i feel like a horrible person, and because he's made me fucking sad a lot of times)

like this summer, i got my bachelors degree (a fucking big thing for me - and he knew that), and he knew that i would have my last exam in, like, the end of june. i gave him the date as soon as i could (maybe two/three weeks ahead) and then like a week before i graduate, he remembers that he has plans with his 5 best friends to go drinking

and guess what

he chooses to go drinking with his friends. he celebrates me for like... 1 hour, 2 hours max. as soon as my friends arrived he was like "oops gotta go drinking with my friends that i can see all the time. no time to celebrate my girlfriend getting her bachelors degree, although she will never ever have a day like this again. no no, gotta go get shitfaced. and i am actually not going to apologize"

also at my last birthday, i celebrated it at my parents house for most of the day, and then went home in the evening (like after dinner) to go get drinks with my friends. we had planned that he would come home to my parents with me the day before, and then we could wake up together on my birthday and he could be with me and celebrate and stuff

3 days before my birthday, he says he doesn't want to go with me to my parents' house to celebrate my birthday, because he has to read for school (it was in a holiday as well, he didn't have school for days). the weekend before my birthday he chose to go drinking with his friends (i was ofc not invited) and couldnt get out of bed for days, but whenever my birthday rolled around he had to be an A fucking student. so he cancels and then we only see each other for the last, like, 4 hours of my birthday, with all of my friends and some family - and then he got annoyed with me for getting sad

he talks over me, he interrupts me and then never asks me what i was saying, he ignores me every time he picks up his phone, he always prioritizes friends, family, work and school over me, he's really good at making me feel small (not in the good way) and stupid. he corrects almost everything i say, also stuff that i dont say, but that he just want to "clear up". he drops plans w me so easily, to be with his friends and he almost never invites me. he insists on touching my belly although i've told him it makes me very uncomfortable, and then gets annoyed when i remove his hand - because 'he likes touching it, and i shouldnt feel bad about my belly'. he often ignores my text messages if he doesnt feel like they matter to him. when i ran my first 10K he ran 11K the next day to show off (he did apologize, but i still cant believe he actually did that shit). whenever ive met his friends and family, they are better at including me in the conversation than he is: he will leave me alone with people i barely know, to go do something else (and he knows that i have some social anxiety). he gets annoyed with me over things that he believes i do on purpose, but i dont (e.g. wake up later than him?? go pee before i make coffee for us?? when i forget socks when i sleep over, and ask to borrow some of his? same w phone charger and other stuff. and he usually ends up with saying "omg its just a joke" but i can feel that it isnt. otherwise he wouldve stopped doing it). sometimes he makes jokes at my expense or is just plain rude, and when i tell him to stop, he will tell me to grow up and accept a joke, and whenever i say he makes me uncomfortable/annoyed he says "i cant take that seriously" or "thats the fun part". he is horrible at picking up after himself, and will get annoyed with me if i do it for him (i cant stand mess, and he knows this.) he wont do the dishes for days on end in HIS OWN apartment, so whenever i come to visit, i usually end up doing them, cause i cant stand mess. and he ALWAYS comes out when theres like 1 spoon left and is like 'oh gosh nooo sweety, you shouldn't have done all that.. awww.. nooo, now i feel bad.. *hug, kiss* oh well' and then go back to laying on the couch).......

ofc he also has good sides, but now that i've mentioned all the crap i have a hard fucking time remembering it. but i know that he does. he gives good hugs, he can give great advice, he usually doesnt judge the stupid things i do. he knows my quirks and he likes cooking me food. he hates rubbing my back, and will get annoyed if i ask him, but he is good at it. he has nice eyes and a cute smile. he knows a lot about the things im interested in (but usually shows off his knowledge in a know-it-all kinda way). hes creative and has good music taste

ugh, i am so sorry for this long ass rant, but i just needed to get this off my chest... if anyone actually read all this, and has some advice or... anything... feel free to send a message or a reply or something idk

i feel horrible

[pluto-sims]

Hellooooo my beloveds, this is just a silly post to pin that you can ignore but, I'm officially calling this semi-hiatus...well, exactly that. I work 9/10 hours a day atm with a 2 hour commute each way, and I'm tireeeeed lmao. I dont know when I last even played a video game let alone get round to doing gameplay edits.

I'll answer asks/WCIFs as and when I can but if I don't get round to it for a week or two, I'm sorry! It's not me ignoring you, I will get round to them at some point I promise.

My NSB2 queue is gonna run out pretty soon and I don't think I'll get round to playing more any time soon. I'm not gonna abandon it because it's given me so much joy and motivation, but rn I can't give it the time I want to.

Dunno when I'll be back to semi regular posting tbh. Maybe when I finally pass my driving test and I'll get home a lot earlier, idk. But I think it'll help me feel less stressed to just accept I don't have time for Sims/Simblr at the moment and not to have this silly idea of somehow making it work lmao. Anyway I love you all and I hope everyone is doing good! When I do get a chance to glance at my dash, your wonderful posts, Sims, and stories bring me a lot of happiness!

See you on the flip side 😎

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

ofmd s2e4 rewatch where i pause to jot down my thoughts and other random shit

it's been a busy week since last thursday and shit's only gonna get busier for me after tomorrow so hopefully i can get through these two episodes out before i go to bed lol!!! anyway once again these posts are just me rambling so i can process the insane amount of information in these episodes and if u want to read them too that's fine.

s2e1, s2e2, s2e3, s2e4, s2e5, s2e6, s2e7, s2e8

rip everyone who wanted homoerotic sword fighting in the gentebeard reunion. have a headbutt as a consolation prize.

obsessed with stede holding raw room-temperature meat against his bruised face bc that's not even a little bit how that works. i love this show.

ok so jim saying "he'll probably get around to killing you after he's rested" in response to stede saying ed needs to regain his strength actually gives some pretty good context to why they want ed of the ship so bad. bc they DID fully try to kill ed and now he's here and alive and like. if i were jim i would be pretty worried abt ed holding a grudge abt that.

wont lie stede being like "we dont just banish people, that's not us!" makes me thinkg abt how they fully banished izzy from the ship in e6. i mean technically izzy banished himself on accident but. lol.

also izzy's absence in this scene indicating he is not yet considered part of the entire crew

roach: i need that steak back, it's dinner stede: (pulling the steak away) oh, right fang: maybe let's put the banishment to a vote? stede: (steak back on his face, apparently having forgotten he was literally just about to give the meat to roach) aw do we have to :(

ed chained to the ship is doing. a lot for me. i wont lie.

buttons saying he's been to the gravy basket a few times... how many times has this man almost died??????

it is deeply funny to me that they edit the split second flashback of the drowning and mermaid hallucination to look all creepy as if that whole scene wasn't set to an incredibly sappy 80's love song (said with immense affection)

OBSESSED with stede trying to be like. encouraging to izzy. and being like "he cant hear you he's got no head" about izzy yelling at the ruined figurehead. this fucking dork.

so ive seen ppl talking abt how the crew's in a deadlock abt banishing ed and which ppl they think were pro-banishment and which were against, but the scenes with the crew make it look like everyone's voting for ed to get kicked out. so tbh i think like either of the following interpretations are pretty valid: the crew is split 50/50 on if they should banish ed OR the crew 100% wants to banish ed and stede was gonna try and leverage izzy's vote to try and get more ppl to change their mind. doesnt rlly matter either way tho

also the fact that izzy was the one to keep ed's body is. interesting. the others must've known abt it and helped izzy hide the body in the secret room. but izzy being the one to be like "no we're not throwing him overboard" is. something. no conclusions abt this atm im just rotating this fact in my brain.

i also just have a lot of thoughts abt the mutiny and the fact that like, jim's a trained assassin and the others are also pretty experienced killers and they probably knew they hadn't completely finished the job. and there was plenty of opportunity for them to do something about that. but instead they hid his body and waited for ed to succumb to his injuries. it feels kinda like ed's "technically i outsource the big job" rule. idk. thoughtssss.

frenchie in this scene is so funny bc he seems both actually apologetic abt kicking ed off the ship but also very relieved/vindicated to see him go.

didnt realize olu almost said smthng to ed lol i thought ed was just saying "fuck you" to him for no reason ghfjkghjkfh

"first time i've ever been on this side of a walk of shame" wee john i have so many questions. how many times have you been banished from a ship.

obsessed with archie just being like "way to make this awkward brah." her shitty boss put her life at risk in an attempt to make her and her coworkers kill him in a weird roundabout suicide attempt and her summary of the situation is "well, this is awkward :/"

"shitty sailing with you" sick burn, jim

"you're making it really hard to look up to you, man" LOVE how black pete is still a blackbeard stan. despite everything.

just ONCE i want someone to appreciate roach's sandwiches :(

"dont you want your sammy" STEDE I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

also i disagree with the subtitles here im like 99% sure says "you're no fuckin mermaid" not "you're not a fuckin mermaid" but that's just me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

stede looks SO sad abt not being a mermaid

love how everyone in this episode just sort of nods and is like "yeah okay" every time buttons tells them he's turning into a bird

altho with stede in this scene specifically im convinced that he's just jumping at the chance to follow ed to the island. he was absolutely gonna come up with some shitty excuse to go ashore anyway but it's nice of buttons to give him plausible deniability

i love how much ed hates nature

why do the subtitles say "gyp-" this has been bothering me all week. the line is "like a drifter"

i also love ed's line delivery of "a wolf?"

anyway dumb posts abt the spider tattoo backstory: 1, 2, 3

i love to see ed getting hugs... wish i could give him a hug :(

ok also buttons talking abt the gravy basket made me think ed needed like some sort of spell or smthng to snap out of it but instead it just kinda wore off by the end of the episode (maybe, depends on how you read the whole buttons turning into a bird scene). this is very funny to me for some reason

anne rubbing the cup she's holding against her tit. queen.

stede bonnet idiot dumbfuck moments

i LOVE anne's line delivery of "eddie motherfuckin teeeeach" like yeah that's cj's girl alright. or was cj's girl. who knows.

SECRET HANDSHAKE im cryinggggg. i love them.

stede's voice sounds so weird when he says "i wasn't looking for you" and that's because he's fucking lying through his teeth

LOVE how anne and mary look at each other after the "shipmates" "former" interaction like they are immediately on the same wavelength. and that wavelength is fucking with ed and his ex. they sniffed out a messy relationship dynamic and were like "oh hell yeah we need more of this in our lives"

ed is SO bitchy this whole scene i fucking love it. ed's face when he says "him?" fdhjksgfjhdgkj

ed: whatever 🙄 anne: whatever? 👀 mary: whatever! 😈

wee john getting more goth is so good

drunk izzy rambling at the ship's figurehead is so funny to me tho i miss drunk izzy

ed's crew lady macbeth "out damned spot" moments

i like how there's a goat in the background of this scene in anne and mary's house and it is unexplained and also never seen again.

ed's face after stede says "that's romance" is soooo good this bitch is so pissed. like oh would you have met me at the docs if i peeled the guard's face off instead of just paying him off? is that what fuckin does it for you???? not that it matters bc i dont care. but. cunt.

yeah im just focusing in on all of ed's faces in this scene. "quite the shift going from wearing people's faces to antique collectors" gets ed to freeze in the middle of bringing his drink up to his lips and just kinda stare off into the distance.

"how did you meet" has ed kind of frowning for a split second before stede starts answering and then he rolls his eyes very dramatically and sighs deeply

ed immediately being like "actually i was gonna kill him myself!" trying to undermine stede's meet-cute story. also anne and mary nodding along in complete unison bc this is just normal pirate conversation to them.

~~~

also as someone who has been team "no ed was dead serious abt the plan to steal stede's identity" this was very vindicating for me. it's a bad plan and it doesn't make any sense but logistics literally dont matter in this show. what matters is giving this story the "falling for the mark" trope makes ed's character arc in season 1 that much tastier!!!!

ed and stede going back and forth telling their story i cant fucking wait until theyre happily together telling this story and instead of ed trying to downplay it and ruin the meet-cute-iness of it they're just building on each other and being sappy and adorable

"more like i relented" one of the biggest lies i've ever heard this man say fjhkgjkfdhk

"until he completely boned it" SAY IT. FUCKING SAY IT. SOOOOO TRUE ED.

auauhghgh the beard bit......... crying

THE!!!!! QUIETEST LITTLE "thank you" OF ALL TIME. TIED MAYBE WITH ED SAYING "thank you" AFTER "i think you're very sophisticated" IN 1.05

i dont blame stede for trying to get ed to open up right after that bc that was the first bone ed's thrown stede's way since he woke up. unfortunately ed is not in the mood to talk abt his near-death experience and mermaid hallucination sequence.

LOVE anne's little gesture when she says "rabbit" and the little hip cocking

stede being like "uhhhh we could leave" during the knifeplay exhibitionism moment

i giggle every time at the way the crew is instantly like "fuck closing our eyes we're doing any fucking surprises"

ngl idgw the crew yelled abt the piñata reveal. but ok

loooove stede's half of the crew just blowing past all the screaming and tension from ed's half. jim screams "STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!!!" abt the blindfold and roach is like "you won't want to stay the fuck away from this caaaake!" like roach fdhsjfgdhfjkghkj read the room?????

i love how much stede just. completely misses all of annie's flirting

ed coughing during the blunt session i love himmmmm

ok but ed's trying to be like "im totally over stede i dont even like him" and then ed reminiscing fondly with a distant smile abt the 1.06 stabbing scene

"and that was the... second time you left your wife?" underrated line

love how annie's been all quiet and seductive and then when she goes to make her move she's just like "WOUND THIS" and aggressively sits in stede's lap

also ok. "they're gonna be so jealous" is that annie talking abt ed and mary or is that annie using they/them pronouns for mary.

BUTTONS JUMPSCARE

also i love how they have that one medusa painting just. in their kitchen. im obsessed with the interior decor of this lesbian antique store that annie and mary live in

the way she's so touched by the poisoning attempt hjfgfjksghskjhgjkh

buttons being like "aahhhhhh do i give her... this bowl......????" fhjkghkfsjhk

"yeah, babe" TEALORANGES WIN

im honestly sad izzy's pathetic wet beast moment only really went for like three tiny scenes in one episode bc this shit was so funny to me. crawling away saying "you're born alone you die alone" over and over again. sir what are you even doing.

god buttons in this episode is so fucking funny bc i keep forgetting he's there. also why is he even there. like was he even invited to dinner or did he just sit down and annie and mary were like "oh ok i uh. guess we'll go make another plate??"

ed's face after buttons says the bit abt "i can tell this rabbit was intelligent" is soooo funny why is he so fucking pissed fdhsjkgyjdfkghjk

NO WAIT HE'S PISSED BC THAT WAS HIS FRIEND. THAT WAS HIS FRIEND THE WOLF HE WAS TELLING HIS SECRETS. NOW IM KINDA SAD :(:(:(

stede talking abt the sea when what he's actually talking abt is ed part 2 electric boogaloo

ed very calmly. standing up. and smashing the chair. im obsessed with him.

stede bonnet stupid dumbass moments

IMPROMPTU BLANKET FORT TIME

ed's voice is so quiet at the start of this scene he's not even yelling at stede until stede says "it's not fair" ohhhhhh my babygirl is so fucking sad........

"you ditching me without a note or anything" ed's literacy confirmed

"expecting me to just melt back into your arms" eddie my man. stede has not given literally any indication that he expected this at all. you are telling on yourself fhdjskghfkjshd

this scene is so fucking good i barely have anything to say abt it. just. u can rlly tell david jenkins wrote this ep himself lolll

"i was all in, mate. i was all in." IM SOBBING

oh nooooo i forgot that ed's line delivery of "im sorry my horrible naked chin disgusts you so much" isnt actually as sarcastic as the words itself make it seem. like it feels like ed wanted to say that all angrily and bitter but instead he just sounds sadddddd

ok ok but the way stede says "i love your chin naked or otherwise" and then after a pause (during which ed is keeping INCREDIBLY still bc u know otherwise he's just gonna burst into tearssss) stede whispers "ed" and ed is immediately like "don't" and then. stede going in for the "i love you" but like the way he's so slow with it?? he's literally like "i. love." and idk if it's bc he's trying to make this as clear as possible or if he's giving ed enough time to cut him off if he doesn't want to hear it

and ed DOES he DOES cut him off with "you don't get to say that to me" and he like. keeps glancing at stede out of the corner of his eye but not quite looking at him directly bc he knowwwwws it's like staring into the sun baby and ed knows if he looks at stede's face it's literally all over.

but also ed's face after stede pivots to "i love everything about you" he's SO pissed. he quietly groans and rolls his eyes bc this bitch. finding stupid loopholes to not being allowed to say "i love you." fuck this guy ed hates him so fucking much (lying)

oooooh when stede says "you don't have to say it back to me" ed's mouth opens and closes a bit before "not about to" bc this man is trying. SO hard not to cry (so am i but it's not working sorry there are tears on my face right now)

idk idk idk smthng abt "it's nice. feels good." makes me hurt so fucking bad bc the entire time since ed's woken up stede's been getting headbutted and snarked at passive-aggressively but stede's still like "i love being near you it makes me happy :)" brb i need. a fucking moment.

honestly tho how did annie and mary even overhear that bit bc they were on the other side of the room and stede was whispering SO quietly. opposite of when ppl in this show dont hear things despite the things being said like two feet away from them (1.03 geraldo and jackie talking abt how blackbeard was looking for stede, 2.01 zheng saying the indigo was worth way more than she spent on it)

LOVE how anne being like "stede likes the ladies" is how ed figures out "ohhhh wait ok theyre just fucking with us, got it" bc this guy??? liking women????? lmao

this also HAS to be why he gets over mary like his brain mustve gone "wait hang on why the fuck would he go back to her he doesn't even like women. guess maybe he really did panic huh" hdjksghfckghkjsh

obsessed with these TINY tiny details abt the ed/jack/annie/mary polycule dynamics we're given. ed would've expected as much from annie bc she's a fucking psycho. mary apparently used to not be like this. im putting the pieces together im connecting the dots.

ed and stede's knowing smug looks at each other. im obsessed.

annie being rlly sensitive to the word "bitch" im considering that more hints abt the polycule backstory

yayy fanny newspaper

"really? i mean she stabbed you, you poisoned her, and then she jumped on my face" stede this is all part of their very elaborate and deeply toxic sex life ok stop kinkshaming them

~~~

curious if ed and stede are too distracted by mary spelling out their worst fears to comment on all the smoke coming into the room

"everything must go" like a fucking clearance sale. this is such a silly line. this is a silly show. i love it here.

WHY DONT THEY MAKE OUT SLOPPY STYLE HERE THO

wait are they crying while they hug??? bro these girls are so fucking messy i love them

ed saying "see you guys" before he leaves them in their burning house. i would die for him

ok team arts and craft time while making a prosthetic for izzy. obsessed with how the b plot of this episode is literally "the crew struggles to get along but they eventually set aside their differences and work together when they realize there's someone even more cringe and pathetic than any of them"

"YOU ARE!!! HARASSING A CRIPPLE!!!!!!" is suchhhh a funny line im sorry im gonna miss izzy at his lowest fhsjkhjksf. literally they just knocked on the door my dude calm downnnn

obsessed with izzy being genuinelly touched and expressing it by saying "fucking cocksuckers." this man is allergic to having feelings.

stede and ed painfully talking over each other bc everything is awkward and difficult. i love them.

ed's face when stede offers to let ed stay. his very quiet "yis." the way he says "might be nice" and then VERY QUICKLY looks away

stede yelling GREAT at the top of his lungs fhdsjkguydfgfjkhl

i love when these guys try to play it cool bc theyre so fucking bad at it hgdfgvjfxdkgjjdkkgjhfdkh

stede bonnet dumb idiot moron moments

ed staring off lovinglyyyyyy

buttons jumpscare

also is that fucking sage. are we doing cultural appropriation here

buttons saying "Earth Wind and Fire i wanna go higher" hfjkhgfdjkhgjkh

i love how ed. does not question this "fuck yeah, brother. fly."

ed teach lovesick fool moments

i love how happy ed sounds telling stede abt buttons he sounds like his old goofy self for the first time all season.... im gonna cry

also i like how the crew adopts izzy as their new creature. 10/10

post credits scene is annie and mary at dinner with buttons. i guess it's after stede goes to comfort ed but before they go eavesdrop on that convo.

buttons enjoying his last meal as a human. and also he's like "there's too much fucking on that ship i need to get away from it all." and his way of doing this is becoming a bird. love that.

[yooniesim]

hey guys, hope yall are doing well as usual! 💗 I think I'm gonna be on break a little while longer.

I'm not sure quite how long. I might be back into it in a day or a week or a month, I just don't know how I'm gonna feel, haha. It's nothing to do with anything here, or sims burn out or something like that (ok, maybe a little burnout, but not much). My mental health just has not been the best all round for a little bit. Often times I'm very tired and struggle with anything besides sleep. I don't have access to meds atm and there's going to be hurdles to climb to improve the situation I'm in now, that sometimes feel like molehills and sometimes like mountains. Life is very heavy now. And while sims remains one source of comfort, simblr has become less so. Sometimes when I rest, things that were said here come back to me and stick in my brain, weigh on my heart instead of lightening it. Usually, seeing good comments from friends and funny asks and people enjoying my cc balances that out, but sometimes it doesn't. It's all things over and done with, that the people involved probably didn't think about then and certainly don't now, and yet I still do. It takes time to forget things like that. Even if it is really just crumbs compared to everything else I'm experiencing, sometimes it's like the little tiny feather landing on a gigantic pile that just causes it all to collapse. But I think, maybe, venting these feelings will help. I know that many of you probably also suffer with depression, self-doubt, intrusive thoughts and other negative emotions. And probably also had (possibly many) indeterminate hiatuses. Besides just keeping yall updated, posting like this feels helpful because I know there are others here that understand that weight. And when I do see good comments from yall, it reminds me that, there is a lot of good here on simblr. That we're all just people trying to connect with people, in the forms of silly lil sims. That lifts my mood a lot.

Ah. Here i am on another tangent lol. I've gone so far off my original point, but. Bringing it in... it may be a while before I'm truly back in form, so to speak. I want to post things here still when I have the energy and motivation. But I dont have a schedule for that just yet. I'll just be taking each day as it comes.

Thank you to the ppl that leave me nice replies and mention me even when I'm on hiatus. Thank you to the two people that donated to my patreon!!! I was so shocked to get notifs haha. Thank you to my lovely mutuals and everyone that downloads my cc. I'm really grateful to everyone!!! I love yall.

And yes...... I will make more teef 😬 just be patient 😉

Now. Back to the skyrim tiddy mods 🤧

[hees-mine]

hi! if you dont want to keep updating the heetober(?) kinktober(?) idk how its called, then its totally okay! i have an idea: if you want of course then you can keep those requests and maybe write some fics about them any other time? like not a something october post, but a normal, typical post of yours. because these are so good! cant wait to see something new coming from you🤍 you have all my support

Hello! I know I’ve been inactive but I’m busy atm plus I haven’t been feeling well since my trip so I’m just recovering and taking a little time to get back into it

I’m going to post the rest of the kinktober fics (in no particular order) so regularly updates will happen in about two weeks from now hopefully but I do have another trip planned soon so we’ll see how that goes and I’ll try to keep you all updated thanks for the support!!!🩵

[kquil]

HEYY KQILLYY BBY♡♡♡

How are youu♡ i hope youre doing good and remembering to drink water. Im checking up on u i hope you dont mind, and i hope hope hope you have a lovely week♡♡

I am swarmed in university projects, all animation atm and really one of my saviours atm are ur fics 😭❤️. You know i have to animate 3 films in like 7 weeks, which is WILD cus in the real world the work im doing atm requires a whole team and like alot of time. But hey i mean the work is working cus i got invited as a student to a film festival in 2 days, im excited but scared cus im like...the youngest one, PLUS i know no one else there.

ANYWAYY, moving on from my life, how was ur day/week/work/etc?? I hope ure taking care of urself.

Question of the day... do you have pets? If you dont, would u want some? What kind of pets do u want?

Much love♡♡♡

my darling! omg! i knocked out doing my first round of check ups with my moots and i was going to do round two soon with you at the top of my list but you beat me to it, you sly little fox you~

thank you so much for checking up on me, my love! you're so thoughtful omg! I haven't been up to anything exciting, just trying to implement new, better habits and stay consistent with them as much as possible (⸝⸝⸝╸w╺⸝⸝⸝)♡ 

awww~ you're working so hard and you're doing amazing! all that hard work is going to pay off soon enough, i assure you! being such a busy bee, i hope you're taking care of yourself, darling! it'll feel much better going through all that work with optimal rest, good hydration and with a contented stomach hehe~ though i am very happy to help give you some peace with my fics -- i'll write all the fics i can to help you feel better!

a film festival?! oh my goodness, that sounds so exciting! and being the youngest one there, you should be so proud! see? your hard work is already paying off, you're amazing! i know you're feeling nervous about it but it's the perfect place to interact with people who have the same interests as you and considering how loveable and wonderful of a person you are, i think you're going to make a lot of good friends there, who knows? maybe you'll work with them on a big animation/film project one day? -- i'm rooting for you, darling ( ˶˘ ³˘(⋆❛ ہ ❛⋆)!♡

my day has been pretty good so far! i did weights after my morning routine and helped mum with something she was cooking up before leaving for my daily walk. when i got back, i did some chores and now i'm sitting down to begin writing some fics (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵) it's been a pretty good day so far and i intend on ending it well too! overall, life's been good, especially after recovering from my seasonal cold but i feel my period approaching -- i just can't catch a break! (ಥ‿ಥ) oh well, we move (ᵕ—ᴗ—) 

oooo~ good question! i don't have a pet right now but as soon as i move out and get my own place, i want to get a cat! i want a pure black cat because i always thought they were gorgeous and if it's a boy, i will name him Hades, if it's a girl, I will name her Nyx. Maybe one day I'll get a dog too but, for now, my eyes are set on getting a cat hehe~ do you have any pets, darling?

(omg! did you draw that?! you're so talented! (๑✪ᆺ✪๑) I LOVE YOU TOOOOOO!!!)

[stellewriites]

twenty questions for fic writers 🫡

thanks for the tag @syoddeye!

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

50

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

699,806

3. what fandoms do you write for?

oh god, ongoing or previous too?? uhm currently batfam, star wars, cod, st - but i’ve had a few extra that i used to write for too

4. top five fics by kudos

i’m not linking them all bc some are,,,, far from my best work. also can u tell i love a long lyric title?

if you can’t give me all, give me nothing ; memorise the way you make me feel ; the way you move like you do ; i’m addicted to the way i feel when i think of you ; took the words right out of my mouth

5. do you respond to comments?

literally every single one,, before getting this account back a few months ago it was the only way i interacted w people in the fandoms so 🤷‍♀️ sometimes it might take a week tho but i try to be quick

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i don’t tend to do angst endings? like even in darker angsty fics i usually twist it so it’s like dubcon happy at the end 🥴🥴 sooo maybe either no grave can hold my body down or can i steal a kiss or two? or even choices made in anger

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

liiiiiterally any other fic i’ve ever written lmao

8. do you get hate on fics?

not often? BUT i usually do fluff fics and when i started dabbling in darker stuff that’s when i got more hate - specifically on one fic in particular

9. do you write smut?

yeah! not all the time but maybe 65%

10. craziest crossover:

i dont really do crossovers but my last mando fic was inspired by justified if that counts?

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of,, again im not very online to be able to know :/

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

yeah! just one but now i dont do it,, learning curve for me

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

almost when i was first starting out writing 6 years back but it fell through - katy if ur still out there i hope ur enjoying life <3

14. all time favorite ship?

ffffuckkkkkk i don’t think i can choose bc i dip in and out so often but i do tend to always come back to jaytim? they’re my for lifers i think but soap x reader is a close second atm

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i’ll always finish my wips bc i can’t stand to see them unfinished,, but it’s been like three years since i first said i was going to write my sci-fi dystopian jaytim fic and im still not past the first paragraph :/

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think i’m good at dialogue and catching accents and nailing personalities pretty quick,,

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i’m so fucking slow. if nothing else, watching people write for cod on here has shown me how quick everyone else seems to be able to write :’)

and also with longer fics i’ve gotten into the (bad) habit of leaving out like integral details that i assume the reader will just know bc ive been too in my own head about it all and ive forgotten what i’ve established already; leads to decisions looking like they’ve come out of nowhere or random personality changes

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

i’ve attempted it but i have to google translate it so i try to keep it to a minimum and ask for correction in the comments. sometimes i do it italicised but written in english so readers can understand that it’s meant to be another language but dont have to skip to the bottom notes or another tab to understand what’s being said

19. first fandom you wrote in?

teen wolf 🥴

20. favorite fic you've written?

idk if i’ve got a favourite,, in hindsight a lot of the ones i think about most fondly are the ones that absolutely killed me off when writing so i’ve got real rose tinted glasses about them all. however these are few that should get honourable mentions just because i like them and they didn’t pop up earlier

whew this was long i think i yapped ontoo much lmao but it was so fun!!

no pressure tags: @glossysoap @mikichko @kyletogaz @femalefemur @sentientcave @gemmahale @madstronaut and anyone else who wants to give it a go!!

[hazeday]

Logging in to Tumblr simply to vent sorry I don't really want to talk about this anywhere else also sorry for not being online ever anymore my only online presence atm is solely on xiv 🫡 god bless.

It's been like. Three months? I think? Since starting hormones and idk I'm like. Going into the depressed phase about it which I think is normal around this stage. I think. Maybe. I was really excited still up until a week or two ago and it's just been a downhill sinking feeling of like. Yaaay nothing. Has changed. Like. There are very slight changes noticable in hair distribution on my body and I think the shape of my neck is slightly different but other than that. Idk it's starting to kinda get to me. I know like logically in my brain that it's a waiting game like I have know that as long as I have been aware of hormone replacement being an option. But idk I remember seeing a little comic the other day someone made about like, dressing "androgenous" for the first time in public and getting immediately gendered differently by a stranger and yeah I know it's a bad mentality to take shit like that personal of other people celebrating gender wins. But it really just reminded me that despite every effort I've ever made to change my appearance, all of the different styles of clothes and hair and makeup I've done in my life, and now even having some hormone therapy that this has still. Just never happened to me. And this ofc started a whole mental spiral of having realized in not too recent history but still grappling with the fact that a LOT of my dysphoria or rather specifically desire to be perceived as something different gender wise by the public is trauma based for me. It just makes me idk think about how much more comfortable I'd feel leaving my house. I dunno I know it's also just winter and whatnot but every year I come to terms more and more with the fact that my agoraphobia is 1. Getting worse 2. Based almost entirely in different forms of trauma, mostly the yk ab/se kind and abl/ism specifically. And it makes me feel! So bad! Because I feel like I'm missing out constantly on things. I want to get excited to go out and do things and generally just be outside of my house but I the fear associated with how people perceive my gender and the legitimate PTSD panic I have every time a curb isn't cut or my wheelchair doesn't fit in a door or strangers stare is like. So hard to communicate. Sorry I dont wanna go out guys I'm just acutely aware of everyone in the world wondering what's wrong with me and also feel like I'm not welcomed in the majority of spaces bc they are inaccessible. Also I'm constantly afraid of being assaulted by every stranger I encounter. 🤪 Which ofc just feed into each other of feeling physically helpless and vulnerable bc of my disability and then the moment a stranger misgenders me I'm like "oh yeah I'm like the easiest target on earth." Anyway this is incoherent as fuck once I figure out how to make strangers perceive my gender different and also how to walk it's over for all of you.

[phagodyke]

I mostly just scroll thru blog subs when im on mobile bc I follow too many ppl on here so I add mutuals etc there n then turn off notifs so it's like the creme de la creme of the dash anyway if u see me in ur notes more its bc I forgor to add some of u on there until recently sorry 😭😭

[miammey]

HI MIAM YOURE PROBABLY BUSY BUT I NEEDED TO RAMBLE ABT MY HD! RANPO AU AND DMS DONT WORK ATM SORRY!! Anyway, I've been thinking of some ideas that I have yet to actually decide on, and I thought, since you're THE hunting dogs blog + I tagged in the first chapter of the fic, why not talk about it with you??

(you're free to ignore this Ik I'm annoying, please tell me if I'm ever distracting/annoying you from smth, I can't really tell myself hihi)

ONTO THE IDEAS!!

First off is, I was thinking of finishing the first bach of chapters (10 or so) before publishing it to AO3, since it's common for me to loose motivation after about a month.

TERUKO & RANPO BEST FRIENDS ----- I've already talked to you about it once but, THE POTENTIALL AAAAAH CHILDISH MENACES!! Their nonexistent dynamic is so important to me<3

RANPO AND JOUNO BEING BIG BROTHERS TO TACHIHARA!! Honestly, Ranpo would be more of a "fun irresponsible" older brother, but he still cares about the boy a lot (*cough* arm scar from protecting Tachihara *cough*) and Jouno pulls them out of trouble:)

RANCCHOU HALF-SIBLINGS??? It's a little thought I had this afternoon, I mean, I always confused them when I was watching the trailer even though I knew that was Tecchou: very surprised at first, but become EVEN MORE besties after they find out; Ranpo not being scared on missions alone in the ADA because he knows Tecchou is somewhere in the shadows ready to strike, Ranpo constantly helping him with strategic situations??? They weekly prank the Hunting Dogs with the "who is who" game, methinks.

RANPO AND JOUNO HAVING A FRIENDLY RIVARLY??? It started when they met, now it's as mich of daily occurence as Suegiku bickering, because they're both cocky and very smart: they keep trying to out-do each other but it's more of a "smart kids who will be there for each other when needed" kinda way; maybe Jouno brings him lunch if he's working full-time at the ADA one day???

RANPO AND FUKUCHI RANPO AND FUKUCHI PLEASE!!! It's so sad how I already have Fukuchi's downfall planned out and Ranpo is going to come out of it more scarred than ever: spoilers aside, their relationship is really sweet, to the point that Ranpo's 2nd nickname is "The Captain's Lapdog", and has the same reaction to praise from him as he does with Fukuzawa back at the ADA.

yeah so this might be a lot sorry mey I'm just excited to speak with you about this:)

ANXNANAAAAA YES THESE ARE SO COOL!!!

And you’re not bothering me, don’t worry!!!

AAAAAAAA I love the idea of Ranpo and the Hunting Dogs!!!

Him being Tachi’s big brother figure is so cute!!!

TECCHOU AND RANPO HALF SIBLINGS!!! Idk if anyone would be confused about who’s who because Tecchou’s like a whole head taller than Ranpo, but I still LOVE the idea

ALSO RANPO AND TERUKO BESTIES HECK YEAH!! They would be a nightmare, I love it so much

And a rivalry between Jouno and Ranpo would be so cool!! They’d have interrogation battles at least once a week, they end up cracking the poor criminal in less than two minutes, poor sucker’s terrified

FINALLY RANPO AND FUKUCHI!!! Aaaaaa Fukuchi’s betrayal is gonna CRUSH him, oh my god

Honestly, talk to me about this AU as much as you want, the more you talk about it the more I love it

[dreamyghostie]

i was tagged twice with this - by @caromitpunkt and @chrisoels - so thank u very much :) lets see ...

Current time: 11:08

Current activitiy: some small household chores and thinking about what i want to do today

Currently thinking about: how i want to fill my very free day. :D

Current favourite song: oh there are a lot! im currently hooked on hello and terrified by emily burns, they have a nice energy

Current reading on AO3: went to look if there were new my first summer fics, and there were! just two short ones, but they were very nice nonetheless :) oh and i jokingly searched for christian lindner fics only to stumble upon this. gave me a good laugh ... :D

Currently watching: still watching the new episodes of horimiya every week and infrequently other anime as well, also some matches of the fifa womens world cup. :)

Current fave character(s): none in particular, maybe i need to dive into some emotionally attaching stories again ...

Current WIPs: nothing worthy of that title i think, there are some rather undeveloped story ideas i put in a folder a while ago and never picked up again, im just not really good at putting time into creative work atm :/

Tagging: dont feel like tagging anyone in particular today, so just feel yourself tagged if u read this and are interested :)

[skiasurveys]

What does the shirt you are wearing look like?   its a grey oversized tshirt that says "All roads lead to rome" lol

What was the last thing that stressed you out or upset you?   school. I have like 9 assignments to do this week.

How do you stay positive with all that life throws at you?   I... don’t.  <- same

What quality do you admire most in other people?   being actually loyal.

What is the highest level of physical pain you have ever been in? rate 1-10   tw// abuse: probably when I got hit by my ex

...same question, but with emotional pain?   -- abuse

What is your most prized possession?   my macbook, it has all my stuff on it lol

Which youtuber do you feel like you could be friends with easily?   i feel like safiya and tyler, and maybe Molly Burke.

Do you like your natural hair color?   its alright. its brown.

Do you think you will dye your hair when you start going gray?   i was thinking this the other day.. maybe.

Are you pale right now, or do you have a tan?   pale

Do you think you look best with a tan?   yeah

What is your favorite app on your phone?   Twitter, Spotify, Tik Tok even tho that app is a curse, and Tumblr

How old were you when you got your first smartphone?   I was 14 I think

Do you ever meditate on Scripture?   sometimes actually

Are you living a life you want to escape from? or do you love your life?   im just living.

When was the last time you felt that life was good?   when i was manic

Do you have one big mistake that you've made that you want to fix?   not anymore. I made mistakes, but it got me to where I needed to be.

Do you wish people would forgive you for your past so you could move on?  yes 

Do you wear green on St. Patrick's day?   no. My dad died on saint pats, so..lmao

Are you Irish at all?   i dont think so

Do you pray to God every day?   sometimes

What are three things you are currently looking forward to doing soon?   sleeping, the last of us episode 9, and working ig

Do you ever dance in the rain?   No.

Have you ever sat on a rooftop?   no, i want to so badly 

Who is that last good musician or band you discovered?   I have no idea.. I think Grandson?

Do you like to watch talent shows like America's Got Talent and X Factor?   i used too but not anymore tbh.

Have you ever tried avocado toast?   yup, and i didnt mind it

Name three items on your wish list right now.  New Ipad for my art, new bed, and maybe a new phone.

Are you more talented musically or artistically or neither?   i guess art

Are you better at English or math?   English.

What were your best subjects in school?   Social Studies/ History and Art

What was your favorite subject in school?   Social or any art class. 

Have you ever visited a teacher at their home?   once when I was in kindergarten and she held a bbq at her house

How many windows are in your bedroom?   One.

Who was your first roommate?   i guess my ex boyfriend

Who was your first best friend (besides a sibling)?   Eden

Do you have a sibling who looks like you?   Not really. I have brown hair, and brown eyes, and my sister has blonde hair and blue eyes lol

Name three women you know who have lost a child.   -- I only know two.

Whose was the last funeral you attended or watched?   My dads like 10 years ago

What types of cancer are in your family, if any?   Breast

Do you have big dreams for your future?   I stopped dreaming.

Do you feel alone?   Yeah, quite terribly.

What is this month's calendar picture?   I dont use a physical one

What is the theme of your wall calendar for this year?   --

Have you ever seen a double rainbow?   Yes.

How old will you be on your next birthday?    27

Which nationalities have you been told you look like? (i.e., Asian, Irish) I got told I looked dominican but I dont see it

Have you ever had an outstanding library fine?   No.

What book are you currently reading? nothing atm

Are you poor/broke right now?   Im broke rn but I get paid soon

Have you ever received any scary, threatening messages on social media?  yeah, I got doxxed once

What is the name of your youtube channel?   I dont make youtube videos but i have a channel ig

How many subscribers do you have on youtube? like 110

Do you wish that life were more fair?   yup

Who was your first kiss?   his name was Brandon

Do you feel you have found your soulmate yet?   Nope.

Are you single or in a relationship?   Single

If you're single, do you want to be, or do you wish you weren't?   I wish I had someone but realistically atm i dont have time for one, and also i need to heal still i think

Ever collected shells at the beach?   i used too omg.

Would you rather paint or carve a pumpkin?   carve

Who are three of your favorite youtubers to watch?   i have so many i watch but i guess atm- CallmeKevin, Kurtis Conner and maybe Markiplier, or Gamegrumps

What year did you graduate high school?   2015

What do you miss about high school?   I think what i miss is life wasnt as stressful as it is now, and i miss seeing friends every day.

What do you miss about college?   Im still in college

What color was your first car?   white

Do you have a car now?   yes

What color was the house you grew up in?   its like a light light teal

Growing up, what floor was your bedroom on?   top floor

What is your birth order in the family?   im oldest

What would your name be if you were the opposite gender?   I think mom said Nathan

What were you almost named?   Jaycee

Does your bedroom have carpet?   Yes.

Best camping experience?   i dont remember much from camping.

What are the top three travel destinations on your bucket list?   Iceland, Italy, and Japan i think

Do you get heartburn?   sometimes, i HATE it

What are three things you are known for in your town?   omg..idk.

What are three things you are known for on social media?   Stan accounts, I run a traumacore account as well on here, and my art i guess

What is your Instagram account name?   --

Have you ever used Snapchat?   Yes, but now I only use for selfies

Did you want to be famous when you were younger?   yes

What show did you most want to be on as a kid?   i didnt rly want to be on any

First celebrity you were obsessed with?   I think Joe Jonas

First celebrity crush?   Michael J Fox LMAOOOO

What was your first favorite stuffed animal?   I dont know my first. but Max my horse i got when i was 4, which i still have lol

What was something unique about you as a kid?   *annoying as fuck

Were you ever goth/emo?   technically I had a emo phase, but my mom nEVER let me fully unleash it lMAO

Do you want any more piercings?   i want them done

How many tattoos do you have?  Zero.

Do you want more tattoos?   I want to get one.

If you had to get a tattoo, what would you get?   I think a cute fox

Do you mostly write in cursive or print?   I think its kinda mix of print and cursive

Were you ever homeschooled?   nope

Describe your dream wedding in five words. too lazy

Pick three animals that you think resemble you, and why?   raccoon, rat, and a fox

Are you unique?   no

Do you get called a free spirit?   No.

What day of the week were you born on?   Thursday

How are you feeling right now? tired

[colorisbyshe]

just gonna do every life update at once because im tired and bored atm

1, JUST got into a podcast two weeks ago and i woke to a ‘sorry for being a sexual abuser’ 6 minute episode update... so that sucks

2. my eyes still hurt and i know its eye strain because ive read like 300k on my phone this week time to go back to physical books

3. got an email from my dance company abut how recital costumes are shipping... do not recall being asked to order one........ so tonight i have to ask if i accidentally missed out on that. or maybe adults dont have to wear costumes in the recital?? but like a girl NEEDS to know

4. i’m tired

5. trying to gently get my friend who canceled plans on me... to reschedule and its so hard. i love her so so much btu christ i make plans to hang out with her like 10 times a year and we actually hang out like 3 times a year. i see out of state friends more than i see her and shes like two towns overrrr