#amy’s ⭐️ving adventure

[miss-ery-3]

when i told my mom that i am trying to 'tone up' (to avoid her being sus of me eating healthier and less during the holidays - i am quite good at acting like i am a nutritionist and that i am in control of a healthy diet) she said "okay ... well hopefully not to lose weight??" and i accidentally said "well it wouldn't be the worst thing to happen, i've gained a couple of kgs"

and her response was "i don't think you should lose any weight, you're so tiny!" which made me feel like 🤭🥰😍🤭🥰😍😍🥰

but then she followed it up with "i actually think the extra kgs really suit you!" ...... 😀😀😀😀😀😀😭😭😭😭😭

so i am in fact ... not tiny ... and ... my weight gain has been VISIBLE

I HAVE GOTTEN BIGGER IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY AND THEY HAVE NOTICED AND HAVE SEEN ME GET BIGGER AND FAT AND NOBODY SAID ANYTHING

i feel so ashamed

[miss-ery-3]

✨hello there✨

i am so bad at keeping myself accountable, and i thought pinning my stats might actually keep me motivated. please do not send any meanspo my way, as that does not motivate me at all.<3

name: amy age: 24 height: 164 cm

sw: 59,9 kg (dec. 4th 2024) cw: 54,2 kg😔 (feb. 22th 2025) ugw: 50 kg

let's do this😎

[miss-ery-3]

i just weighed myself and i am so f.cking mad at myself and i am so devastated

60,5 kg

i am HEAVIER than when I started my blog last summer. what the f.ck!!!!

i could be telling myself excuses like ‘i had 3 beers yesterday and a salty meal, maybe i’m retaining a lot of water’ or ‘i have already had two glasses of water and a cup of coffee today’ but i don’t even ffcking care anymore. this is SO ffCKING bad

i am fasting until i get to my friend’s house tonight and i will eat a little of whatever she serves me. i’ll get all my steps in by walking to her house and back. tomorrow i’ll probably start in the gym and i’ll either do omad or have an eating window of 4/5 hours

i am so ffcking sad right now i could cry

[miss-ery-3]

this bitch is at 54,2 kg, which is like 6 kg less than in december wuhuhuuu!!!

fuck the fact that i might be chronically ill and that my body is actually dying from disease in front of me

and fuck the fact that i've c/tted my whole leg to pieces tonight because i am fucking miserable

being skinnier is great, but it wont solve all the other shit going on... i am sorry. please seek some help

and i am also just drinking straight liquor in my bedroom because fuck everything i dont want to be here tomorrow

[miss-ery-3]

so yesterday i made dinner, which came out to like 500 calories (i made a big batch to save some for today, which means i am kinda guesstimating my calories, but it was basically just veggies and then i counted 140 calories in just oil, which might've been a bit high haha)

but i was still craving something afterwards, so i made a bowl of greek yogurt and ate a couple of fruits and it satisfied me soooo well and only came out to like 200 calories.

i havent been above 1000 calories for 4 days straight and today will be no different !!

[miss-ery-3]

once again i've been away, but this time i think it has been good for me

when i returned to tumblr in december, i weighed just about 60 kg and i fought really hard for like two weeks and then i returned to the whole binge/cry/restrict-cycle. when the new year started, i decided to not let food be the biggest thought in my head all the time and just ... kinda go with the flow

i made 3 rules:

Eat as little junk food and snacks as possible (i've had snacks about once a week since, and not really any junk food)

Walk everywhere and try to be more active

Start the day with 2-4 rice cakes and then eat whenever i get hungry (i get a tummy ache if i dont eat before taking medication)

AND GUYS

i am officially down to 55,5 kg again ?!?!?!?!?!

last time i was this weight it was through 1/1,5 months of HARD work. i mean running up to 20 km weekly, eating about 800 calories a day, feeling fucking sick all the time, having no energy and forgetting everything.

i am very very very happy !!!