#but i did go through a few in my 15 years on this website

[nanihirunkits]

I (think) I have followed you for a while but did you use to have a different url/icon?

yes! my most recent url used to be moonkhao and i had a joong icon until i changed it to sky a couple of weeks ago

[darkkitty1208]

Reigen Arataka Headcanons (pt. 1/?)

I've been thinking about this cringefail loserboy babygirl A Lot lately (i cannot spend more than 15 minutes without my thoughts circling back to him somebody sedate me) so. Here are some of my favourite and/or personal headcanons of him (most are picked up from fanfic that I hold close to my heart, some are from shower/late night thoughts) split into 4 categories (general, food/drinks, physical/appearance, and family & childhood headcanons). Under cut because this got a LOT longer than I intended

Geneneral Headcanons

He's trans ftm & gay

Most of the shelves in his apartment are empty—he didn't have much memorabilia, photo frames or items that are personal/scream "Reigen" because his place is less a home and more a place for him to sleep and shower and eat. He does have generic self-help and anatomy (for massages) and exorcism guide books, but not much else. However through the years he starts keeping potted plants and has a mini vegetable garden in his balcony (mostly cherry tomatoes, but others too, like green onions and the like) and flowers in vases on his tables and little cacti and succulents and houseplants around.

At some point he also keeps photos in frames. There's one from an outtake from the s&s company's employees lineup photo he thinks is "necessary for their professional image" and insisted on taking (the resulting photo was framed in the office and in the website; in the photo he looked like a smug cat, Mob and Serizawa looked like stiff wooden panels, and Tome, horrified, looked eerily similar to her mother, while Dimple despite being there did not appear in the photograph), and it was a picture of Mob mid-way through blinking with his hand up in the beginning of forming the peace sign and Reigen arguing at the air while Tome argues at Reigen. Also in it Serizawa looked exasperated and confused.

Despite not actually wanting psychic powers, Reigen really, really wants to see their auras. The few glimpses he gets from when the espers use enough power to gain some semblance of visibility to the naked eye leaves him mesmerised.

He also isn't really afraid of them. Sometimes he feels Mob's or Serizawa's aura wrapping around him, like a protective touch on his shoulder or the small of his back when a client gets especially rude or rowdy, or during an especially dangerous exorcism. It freaked him out at first but he gets used to the warm, buzzing static over time.

His nose scrunches up when he's trying to concentrate.

He only learnt the existence of the undo button when he took a photoshop class one time.

He takes the kids and Serizawa to outings sometimes but with a strict (however fairly (and unusually) generous) budget. This leads to beach episodes and zoo/amusement park visits and hikes to watch meteor showers Tome talks about a lot during the weeks prior.

He's practically memorised the kids' favourite snacks and keeps them in stock in the office's snack cabinet. They are sweeped out clean without fail every single week.

He turns on classical music/instrumentals in the background when he's trying to focus. He always needs some sort of white noise.

One time Tome gave him handmade chocolate. They turned out to be chocolate-covered bugs from her friend. He hasn't and will never recover from the trauma.

When Mob first arrived he tried to quit smoking (replaces it with chewing gum, lollipops etc) but immediately caves 2 weeks in. The longest he's lasted without a cigarette is a couple months. He indulges in the occasional cigarette once every few weeks but keeps a limit of 4 sticks/week and not going beyond that. He sometimes fails to keep his word.

There's always the smell of tobacco clinging on him and his suit. He can't get rid of it.

His emergency contact includes his mom and Mob before he switched it to his mom and Serizawa because, well. Mob's a kid. His mom doesn't use the number he has saved anymore but he doesn't bother asking for her new one.

Food/Drinks Headcanons

He likes citrus.

He likes mushrooms, and moreso when in dishes like soup.

He isn't exactly a coffee person, but when he consumes caffeine it hits him almost immediately. You can practically see it set in in his eyes. He gets jittery and restless. (More so than usual lmao.)

He isn't a tea person either, nor does he have a preference in tea, though they keep different kinds of tea in the office and most of them are not-so-cheap-but-affordable hojicha, which are the clients' popular preference, so he drinks those.

When he makes tea he often leaves the kettle on for too long. His special move is pouring cold water from the sink over the cup(s) to compensate for his mistake.

He doesn't cook often for himself, but he has enough cooking skills to be confident enough to make a good meal when he tries/should he need to impress somebody, but not enough to go without a proper recipe. The problem is that he references them without actually following them. He's too impatient and stirs things when he should let them be, he refuses to measure practically anything, he forgets things and leaves after turning the stove dial on the highest setting and burns the food and tries to do multiple tasks at once without following a set order, he uses too many pans and pots, and he makes a mess. He's a menace in the kitchen but he can be trusted enough not to burn it down.

Follow-up on that last one: he thinks cooking can be a hobby of his if he dedicates more time on it, but it's the kind of activity that's easier (and more enjoyable) with company. He lacks that.

Physical/Appearance Headcanon

I stand by the hc that Reigen bleaches his hair. Mostly because I think he greys quickly. His natural hair is dark brown almost black, and the strands are stiff from constant bleaching.

He's got scars all over him from exorcisms and fist fights and what have you, but most of them are little nicks and cuts that have faded over. The notable ones are his top surgery scars (and this is an insignificant but harmless detail but the nerves on one of his pecs healed weirdly), the scar over his back from when Sakurai's sword sliced him back in the 7th division arc, and the scar mostly hidden under his bangs from the rubble that hit his head back in Mob's psychic outburst.

He has a little pudge around his stomach. There are stomach rolls there when he bends or slouches.

He tries to keep himself fit by working out, but he has horrible stamina. Around confession arc he starts having more defined muscle along his arms, though they've always been there from massages but hidden beneath his sleeves.

He takes good care of his hands and are very mindful about them. He thinks they're one of the first things a client would notice about him (but that's mostly because he moves his hands around a lot). Aside from the massage oils he uses during "physical exorcisms" he also uses lotion to keep them soft. He trims his nails short regularly and makes sure they're clean. Despite all that they are sweaty almost 90% of the time.

He. Has. Prominent. Eyebags. This man is an insomniac and a workaholic. He uses cheap foundation sometimes to cover them up but they get cakey and cracky during the day and he sweats buckets so they're mostly futile. He keeps using them anyway.

His lips have a darker shade from years of smoking but he tries to keep them from getting dry by using lip balm.

He has freckles all over his skin and spanning along his shoulders, and they practically bloom on his skin during the summer.

He has little crinkles between his brows and the edges of his eyes, lines under them. Some are smile lines, some are frown lines.

He has crooked teeth. He keeps good hygiene of them, though.

Family & Childhood Headcanons

He used to sit on his hands to stop them from moving because he's been told multiple times that they gesture a lot when he talks.

He had a childhood dog.

His mother used to make lemon cakes for his birthday.

His grandparents used to garden. He used to help.

The first time he smoked a cigarette was age eleven, when his father offered it to him one time to "have a taste of what it's like to be a man". Age sixteen, he started sneaking out to smoke. By the time he grew up the habit stuck and he mostly smokes as an excuse to take breaks between customer service during his watercooler job. (This was picked up from my short little fic drawn to the flame which is somewhat of a character study centered around Reigen's smoking addiction :D)

His sister is a lawyer and makes wild gesticulations with her hands when defending a client in court. (Ik it was probably mentioned somewhere that she works for a bank BUT when have I cared. Also the vision of wild wrist rotations being a thing that runs in the Reigen family is too good to not practically be canon already.)

His grades weren't all great but he tries. He just can't seem to pay attention in class or sit still for too long. He sucked (still does) at math.

In school he was pretty popular because he's loud and charismatic and lays the charm thick on first impressions, but popularity comes with it some kids that weren't as fond of him as others are.

He calls his sister sometimes, or at least picks up when she does. He wishes he got to spend more time with her before they moved out.

I imagine young Reigen as skinny with gangly limbs and too-big hands and there's always a band aid on him somewhere for some reason.

Anyway that's all I've got for now. I might come up w more but. *shrugs* who knows.

Now that I think about it, maybe I should make a post for headcanons of Reigen's sister... hm.

[cocoatonedcurls]

become an academic weapon 📚🔫✨

hi all !!

with my GCSEs this year, and only a few weeks before back to school, I decided to really lock in yesterday 🫣

so I thought I'd take all the info I've come across while scrolling through studytok and put it into a little post for everyone looking to improve in their studies (& for my benefit as well 🙈)

motivation

this is probably the biggest factor when it comes to locking into your studies, motivation can quite literally make or break your academic achievements (😦)

so, its very important you motivate yourself, and moreover, stay motivated 😭

i've made it sound daunting but motivating yourself is lowkey easier than you think, here's a few ways to do it:

picturing yourself in 10 years, where all your studying and hard work has paid off - you can't be that person without doing the work that they did 😬

you can also do the opposite of the above - imagine how disappointed you'll be if you didn't work as hard as you could have and failed

"revenge studying" - the most toxic yet probably the most widely effective technique - working hard so you can beat than the people who are better than you

make studying aesthetic - create pinterest boards, look at quotes and tiktoks, make success your greatest desire

make it an addiction - if you're bored? study. had a bad day? nothing like setting yourself up for the best future. having a great day? go make it better by making yourself smarter.

get a motivational study app - i LOVE 'Study Bunny' I've been using it for two days now and it genuinely motivates me to be more productive to keep my bunny happy 🙃

resources

obviously, you need some help where you can get it despite all the controversies surrounding studying and the use of the internet, there are some amazing online resources you can use that will actively help you 📚

Quizlet/Anki - both of these flashcard platforms are incredibly useful - Quizlet is a fun platform and you can search for flashcards made by other people - Anki, in my opinion, is better than Quizlet for memorising, and you can import flashcards from Quizlet.

Mindnote - A mindmap making software online, a user-friendly interface + is quick and easy to make them - Great for visual learners

YouTube - the teachers on YouTube are incredibly helpful and can explain any topics you're confused about very quickly and very thoroughly

Spark Notes - great for English literature, with in-depth analysis of your texts and modern translations

Physics & Maths Tutor - free past papers and topic questions for core subjects and a few others, great for active recall

Study Bunny/Flora - helps keep track of your progress and keeps you motivated, I recommend Study Bunny because I can see how much work I've done of each subject and tick off things on my checklist

these are just a few out of many other resources so go do some of your own research, especially if there are websites that help with a specific subject

techniques

different study techniques work best for different people, no technique is a one-size-fits-all, some people are visual learners, others perform best by memorising & etc.

active recall - the only one-size-fits-all method - is a cognitive function that you carry out to remember things in tests, so practising this is a must -> the best way to do this is by completing topic questions and past papers using minimal amounts of notes. basically just testing yourself before the actual test

Spaced-out revision - one of the best ways to make sure things stick in your mind, revise a topic/subject and revisit it every few days, eg. 1, 3, 5, 9, 15, 30; and by the 30-day mark it should be stuck in your mind because your brain believes its something that you need to know in the long run and stores it in your long term memory

Flashcards - great to memorise content for the test, especially subjects that are tested with orals

Scribble method - scribbling on a piece of paper while revising the content in any form, reading, listening, etc. helps your brain store the information you're consuming more effectively

Feynman method - basically just explaining the topic you're revising to someone, this helps you develop your understanding and catches out any areas you're unsure about to revise later

making mindmaps - this is great for visual learners, especially if you use different colours for each section of the map so that you can associate each concept with each colour and recall them easily

again, those are just a few that come to mind. do your own research and find out what works best for you 😇

while studying

knowing how to study effectively is also a crucial aspect of success (obviously) 🤭

here are a few tips:

don't listen to music with lyrics, instead you can listen to lofi tracks, cafe/library asmr, brown noise, jazz music (my favourite)

set yourself a study slot, like 2 hours every day at a specific time & set a focus filter on your phone for the duration of your study time

make an aesthetic/cute study space so you can enjoy your time in that space and it doesn't feel like a chore

get a whiteboard to make learning more interactive & fun

light a specific candle whenever you're studying so your brain knows to associate the scent with working

have regular breaks eg. every half hour for 5-10 mins

reward yourself afterwards, so you associate studying with a good experience

consistency is key, the more you study the easier & more fun it becomes 🙃 the more you study the more you are likely to succeed and fulfil your dreams ✨

remember though, academics is not everyone's thing:

"you cannot judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree"

everyone is good at something, and it doesn't make anyone lesser or greater 🫶

if you try your best, that is all that matters 🫠

- li 🌘

[summerlycoris]

The facts about Vanessa’s history prior to Security Breach. (And a summary of the different companies involved in AR and HW.)

I won’t lie, this (hopefully!) effortpost was prompted by watching Dual Processes latest video about Vanessa, where they state that ‘In AR, Vanessa pretends to be an IT Rep to trick Silver Parasol Games into giving her full access to the game.’ Which was… interesting, to me. Because it showed Vanessa’s email to Steve Wilson, who works for Anna Kwemto, who works for…

We don’t actually know the company she, or her underlings, work for.

Anyway, this isn’t made to target any specific people- Dual Processes’s video about Vanessa is brilliant (no spoilers- go watch it!) despite my quibbles at the very start. And the corporate chains in HW and AR, are confusing and easily mistaken- to the point the fnaf wikia has a lot of errors I needed to shift through while researching this topic…

I’ll lay all my chips on the table straight up- I had to find out a lot of Vanessa's backstory just before Ruin released, because I wasn’t really following fnaf until after Ruin was announced. I’d dipped around the HW days.

But I’d noticed a fair bit that, because few people played AR, and even those who did play AR likely didn’t see all the emails, that there are a lot of assumptions about who works for who, and who does what. False info that led me into believing a lot of misleading information about Vanessa before I looked into it more.

This misinfo even goes as far back as HW- do you think Vanessa works for Silver Parasol Games in HW? It’s a common belief- but I think it’s a misconception. And I’ve brought proof to the table.

Anyway, the point of this is to lay out anything about who works for who, and where they work. Because corporate chains are complicated, in a series that is already complicated enough!

First things first, what companies are we dealing with?

Well, there’s Silver Parasol Games. Which gets shut down and brought out during HW’s development. (Tape Girls Tapes- 1, 10, 15) I’m not gonna try to put years of operation because… no. But I do need to make it clear it shuts down prior to Vanessa beta testing the game.

People working at this company named in HW include Dale, Jeremy, and Tape Girl. If you go off the scrapped fake website for Silver Parasol Games, then the company also includes Gabriella, Tonya, and Aiden. (One of the two girls is likely Tape Girl.)

There is also Another Potential Development Studio, which is unnamed but suggested to be buying out Silver Parasol Games. (Tapes 10, 15). We don’t know much about this company other than Vanessa must work here during HW. [She never mentions a boss, or coworkers with this company.]

For AR, there is Anna Kwemto’s company, which is a subcontractor working for Fazbear Entertainment. It goes unnamed in AR.

The people working at this company include Anna Kwemto, Daniel Rocha, Raha Salib, Steve Wilson, and Mark Cho.

DLZ Shipping Solutions- a company that shipped animatronics parts to… they don’t say which company. But we at least know which person- Lisa Jameson (regional director of logistics for an unknown company.)

Their employees include Jimmy Hauss, (before getting fired) and James Strand.

Fazbear Entertainment- has a variety of teams and job positions. I’ll try to list them all here, though not in order of operation sorry. Kayla Stringer- Legal. Vanessa A- Security. Luis Cabrera- IT. Shonda Ford- legal. Greg Abernathy- IT. Dan Ximenez- IT. Jerome Khan- Accounting. James Campbell- IT. Todd C- Office Staff. Aiden Jackson- IT. Ivan Gagarin- Accounting. Diannah Larimore- Marketing (laid off). Maria A- Marketing (laid off.). Cheryl M- Office Staff. Anand G- Legal.

All from here on out have unknown job roles- Kenneth Freeman, Christie Buckley, Ben Pulley, Karen Soto, Brenda Tanaka, Stanley Howser, Jack Sims, Jay Murphy, Charles Ramirez. Jim Campbell.

There are also basic login details from some unknown people, from another unnamed company in ‘Security Incident Log- September.’ They are J_B and A_L.

There are also more workers who don’t have a specific company they’re tied to- but are working with the Funtime Service. These include Nora- R&D. Tristan- Compliance. Charles- QA. Isolde- Customer Service.

Okay. So that’s the raw data. Kowalski- analysis!

Jim and James Campbell are… interesting. They could be brothers. They could just have the same last name. They could just be a mistake- someone misspelling a name and accidentally making two characters where there should be one.

Honestly, I’m assuming it’s a mistake. AR was being made in that timeframe where Scott was pretty hands off about the story, and barely communicating with Steel Wool about SB. This is likely just a mistake that no one cared enough about enough to notice or correct. Like Luis being in IT in AR, then in Marketing in SB. Without any foreshadowing that he was transferring.

I wish they’d clarified which company Lisa Jameson, Nora, Tristan, Charles and Isolde worked for- or if they worked together, even. It sounds like they all work with the funtime service, based on the emails. But I can’t be sure of it, because none of the Nora/Tristan/Isolde/Charles emails reference Lisa, and vise versa.

*sighs*

It’d be useful to know if they work for Anna Kwemto’s company, Fazbear Entertainment, or somewhere else entirely. Because that’s the key to figuring out whether Anna Kwemto’s lot were scanning circuit boards for game development (unlikely for the timeline- but as said in the Jim and James rant- Scott wasn’t communicating with his teams. And its unlikely Steel Wool was communicating with Illumix either.) Or whether they were scanning circuit boards to recreate animatronics for the funtime service.

If Lisa was working for Anna- then it’s fairly cut and dry. They’re working in a warehouse storing animatronics, with an office attached for more hands-off staff.

If Lisa was working for Fazbear Entertainment in-house, then that leaves the possibility that Anna Kwemto’s lot weren’t running the Funtime Service. (Since Lisa’s emails imply her warehouse has ‘active animatronics’ too- including Bonnie eating a cat… which… I could’ve done without knowing thanks game.) And the Nora/etc emails explicitely talks about the new animatronics being sent out with the Funtime Service.

Also, sucks not knowing for sure who and where from J_B and A_L are. I’m assuming that they’re unnamed people from Fazbear Entertainment’s IT department- considering when Vanessa hijacks herself an IT email address, it has the same layout (V_A). But it’s not confirmed and no one with these initials is written as working for Fazbear. (Unless I missed something- please let me know!)

With Anna Kwemto’s company- it scans circuit boards of animatronics, which is why people might confuse them with Silver Parasol Games. However, they are never stated to be involved in game development. And by the time Vanessa has left Another Potential Development Studio to join Fazbear Entertainment, Silver Parasol Games should no longer exist as a separate entity. (Considering it was going to be bought out by Another Potential Development Studio while Vanessa was working there.) Timeline-wise, Anna Kwemto being the head of Silver Parasol Games doesn’t add up. And circuit boards could be scanned for a variety of reasons- say, if you’re making replicas of old animatronics for the funtime service.

(But that’s getting into speculation- while it’s implied they’re a subcontractor running the Funtime Service for Fazbear in the emails, there’s no explicit proof. Only the email from Raha Salib to the rest of the crew talking about an unknown user giving commands to all ‘active animatronics’ really gives us a hint to them running the Funtime Service. And that doesn’t neccesarily mean active animatronics are from the Funtime Service.)

‘Where are you getting a timeline from Summerly?’ from the games.

Vanessa gets infected by Glitchtrap, because circuit boards are sent to Silver Parasol Games and scanned into the Freddy Fazbear Virtual Experience. (The in universe VR game Vanessa’s working on) Vanessa can’t start being possessed by Vanny and acting weird around Luis before she get’s possessed- so HW must happen before the storyline events of AR.

During the story of AR, Vanessa (most likely Vanny puppeting her) locks out all of Anna’s workers, including Anna, after they scan some circuit boards and got a virus. Because they’ve been locked out, all ‘active animatronics’ become impossible to control. Around this time, either Vanny or GGY sends out a data package using a new account- ‘_pizzaplex’ that presumably 1. Targets the pizzaplex currently in the process of either being built or operating, and 2. Infects the animatronics there.

(Again- Scott was hands off during this time. I know this contradicts The Storyteller.)

If it was any other way around, Vanessa wouldn’t be infected with Glitchtrap during AR. She’d just be… being extremely weird for no good reason. Doesn’t make sense storywise.

Ultimately, these random companies and workers aren’t important except for acting as reference points- who works where and whos coworkers with who?

The important part is Vanessa. And this post does have something to say about Vanessa. Mainly, what I’ve already included- no, she did not work for Silver Parasol Games. But also something I had falsely believed prior to doing this research- she didn’t work at Fazbear Entertainment before working as a security guard there during AR, either. Or at least, that’s never proven. She works for the company that buys out Silver Parasol Games. Then probably job hops between games, to get into a position that is more useful for Glitchtrap. A position at Fazbear Entertainment.

It’s never explicitly stated that Vanessa (or Vanny) is sending the tutorial emails to customers of the funtime service. But considering the focus on collecting remnant, the sender being ‘FAZ//...AR ENT##AIN_!MENT’, and the repetitions of ‘funFUNFUNfun’ and similar throughout those emails… It’s likely Vanny is sending out those emails after hijacking the funtime service animatronics. (Which would explain why she wanted to work at FazEnt, and why she locked out Anna Kwemto’s lot if they were running the Funtime Service animatronics for FazEnt.) Basically, in order to control the animatronics, she needed to control the subcontractor (s) and have a position in FazEnt to exploit.

Why did she want to control the animatronics? Remnant, probably. The modified emails sent from ‘FAZ//...AR ENT##AIN_!MENT talk about collecting remnant. And some of the animatronics sent out through the Funtime Service emulate the Funtime Animatronics… like Funtime Freddy and Circus Baby. Who would have stomach hatches, if whoever replicated them didn’t think too hard about what they were building.

Basically, Vanny needed remnant. Possibly for rebuilding Afton. Possibly for fixing the Mimic. She could risk herself getting remnant personally… or she could get some machines to do it for her. These machines would also be useful for, say, disposing of some meddling therapists at a later date.

This may even explain what the scooper's there for in Ruin. Vanny may have been using the scooper on the Funtime Service rentals to receive their remnant after they killed someone.

Anyway, that’s all I got for now.

[strangerthingsfanworkrecs]

Artist Highlight: Talanashta

This week, we're highlighting @talanashta! All recs this week will be for their work. @talanashta writes, and makes graphic designs at @talanashta-graphics. If you want to see all their work, check out their website! (which they also designed and maintains) We're highlighting Talanashta for their incredible Stobin dynamic.

We strongly recommend checking out their UnderTale crossover fic -- Fallen Down, which they also did a bunch of fantastic graphics work for. Talanashta answered some questions about their creative process and their work under the cut

Why Stranger Things?

I had read a few Stranger Things fics way back when the show first came out and knew a bit about the show, but at the time I hadn't been drawn in. (This was immediately post-season 1.) But then as the show continued, and Steve became a bigger part of it, and Robin was introduced, I got sucked in fast. I love both of them so much!

What's your favorite ship (platonic or romantic) to create for?

Stobin. They are my OTOTP, above any other pairing in any other fandom, and I'd like to think that comes through in my works. I have so many emotions about these two, it's ridiculous. Pretty much if I've got both Steve and Robin in one of my fics, that's it; they're the main focus.

What's your typical writing process like?

I have a bit of a hodgepodge of styles. It really depends on if I have a plan in mind or not. Sometimes I'll write with a super detailed outline and stick to it, but most of my works I just go with the flow and write where my creativity takes me. If you ask anyone, though, I'm a notes person. Any of my fics that involve actual planning end up with pages upon pages of notes.

What got you started on making graphics?

For the things for my site, I just wasn't finding resources out there that were what I wanted, so I started making my own. Plus I wanted my accounts to have my own creative touch on them, instead of someone else's.

What's your typical designing process like?

Vibes. 100%. I have a couple styles I like, so I pick a theme or color scheme and just build on those. Like for my seasonal stuff, I'm just like "What's Halloween-y? Pumpkins? Toss some of those in there then!" I use Canva (the free version) for making most of my graphics, but I use Krita for anything Canva can't do.

What has been your favorite project so far? Why?

Fallen Down is for sure my favorite. It's very fun to see these two familiar characters going through a very new situation like this, interacting with other characters I love. It's got a bit of mystery, some adventure, friendship, the works. I also have a very loyal fan of the story who leaves me very detailed comments that always make my day!

What has been your hardest project so far? Why?

Kinktober. I've been doing creative writing for over 15 years now, but I only recently dipped my toe into occasionally writing smut, and boy, did I struggle with it. It's like any skill, and I just didn't/don't have a lot of practice. I ended up only filling a few prompts for it and called it good.

Have you ever had a creative block? How did you get over it?

I don't have too many issues with that, in general. I feel I'm a pretty creative person. Over the years, though, I've learned a few tips to help when I come across a stumbling block. If the story isn't flowing, I go back a few paragraphs and try again. Usually, the direction I'd been taking the story in just wasn't the right one, so I don't force it.

Is there a big source of inspiration for you? Books? Art? Games?

Stranger Things isn't my only fandom, so some of my inspiration comes from what's going on in other fandoms. I read a lot of fanfiction if I'm being honest, and that shapes a lot of my ideas.

Is there an upcoming project you're particularly excited about?

My Eddie Munson Big Bang fic! I don't want to spoil anything, but it follows middle-school Eddie just after he moves in with Wayne. In the fic, their neighbor at the trailer park owns a dog. It's a very "horse girl" fic, with Eddie and this dog and their developing friendship. It's got some angst, but it works towards a lot of positive feelings and a happy ending.

Is there anything we didn't ask that you'd like to add?

If anyone out there reading this ever wants to talk about any of the things I've put out there (my site/coding, my fics, my art) or ask more questions, feel free to DM me! I'm always happy to chat.

[trivialbob]

Last night Sheila and I went to a seafood place. For a cheeseburger.

Coastal Seafoods in Minneapolis is a fresh seafood market. It's a neat little place. When @littlerunnergurl visited us years ago she and I shopped there for ingredients of a seafood stew LRG made for us.

There's a small counter for hot food in back. Two four-tops and a small row of bars stools next to a cold window is the complete dining room. A Facebook page devoted to smashburgers had mentioned this place's burger recently. That's what got us over there.

We ordered one Coastal Burger. "Two 4oz Wagyu Beef Patties, Caramalized Onion Jam, Pickles, American Cheese, & Dijon Mayo on Toasted Brioche!" (images from the Coastal Foods website)

I also ordered the wonderful looking Connecticut Style Lobster Roll. "Warm Lobster & Seasoned Butter on a Toasted Tom Cat Bakery Roll"

The cook cut them in half so Sheila and I could try some of each. Both were fantastic. We didn't order French fries or any sides. The older I get the wiser I am about not ordering too much food. For sure if there had been a serving of fries in front of me I wouldn't have left until the plate was clean. As it was, we walked out feeling satisfied yet not needing to adjust the car seats back so we could fit in the Subaru.

I'd been wanting to see some dive bars. A block away is the Fraternal Order of Eagles #34. It's an appropriately dimly lit place where most of the customers seemed to know each other. We didn't order food, but I almost did just to purchase a cheeseburger for under ten bucks, a rare thing these days.

The bartender was friendly. She knew what to pour for people a few times without asking. I chuckled when she asked us if we'd be okay for a bit unattended when she went outside for a quick smoke.

It's located at the intersection of two similarly named streets. When I was a kid it was mind-blowing when I saw Minneapolis street signs with the same numbers. Sure, the Av and St make a difference, but it still seemed like division by zero to someone not yet accustomed to how cities named numbered east/west and north/south roads. Similarly, I was amazed when my dad pointed out the named streets in some places were in freaking alphabetical order.

After a bottle of beer (and a sunset) we drove south a short distance through the cold and dark night to the Schooner Tavern. It too is at an intersection of numbered streets.

It was a bit louder, but no less dimly lit, than the previous place. The two bartenders were very friendly. Sheila and I again sat at the bar for one beer.

We listened to conversations around us. It was only 5:30 PM but some folks appeared to have started the evening early. A frazzled looking guy (who was probably 15 years younger than he actually appeared) must have gotten the happy hour special on "fucks" which seem to have been a 20-for-1 deal. Whew, I got tired of hearing that word used as noun, verb, adjective, preposition, pronoun, article, and adverb.

The bottles behind the bar appeared to glow. If the bar had been quieter maybe I would have heard them hum.

Sometimes I want of those tiny Red Bull refrigerators with the glass door (as seen in the left side of this picture I took). Sheila doesn't think it would look appropriate on our coffee table no matter how well it fit. People would probably trip over the power cord she also claims. I still want one though.

We still enjoyed the atmosphere while we had one beer. After that we headed to the brewery by our house. It's at the intersection of one named and one numbered street, more to the sensibilities of my suburban mind.

We met up with one couple we know and another couple who were on a second date. The guy is a regular, the woman is new to that crowd. At first she seemed like she wanted to move to a private table. Soon though she warmed up to us, and the six of us had a great conversation.

I'm going to start looking up some more dive bars for another weekend.

[beatrice-otter]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag Game

@whetstonefires tagged me! 17 was missing, and I searched for the meme and found one that had a question 17, so it's back!

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

256! But that's going back 18 years, so it's an average of a little over 14 fics per year.

2. what’s your total AO3 word count?

1,245,329. Which works out to an average of 4900 words per fic, or 69k words/year. Respectable, solid, but I know a lot of people who've written more.

Oh! But there are a couple of podfics in there, which probably skews the words-per-work a bit.

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Uh. A quick count gives me 112 fandoms on my AO3 page, so ... a lot. I regularly write for Yuletide, and I'm polyfannish, so. A lot. I used to be big into Stargate SG-1, so I've written a lot of that but not recently. Other top fandoms include Battlestar Galactica, Buffy, various DC fandoms, various Star Trek and Star Wars fandoms, Babylon 5, Terminator (especially the Sarah Connor Chronicles), the Vorkosiverse, the Goblin Emperor, and Rivers of London.

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Past Lives (a stalled WIP that is a Star Wars time travel fixit starring Finn)

Lieutenant Bennet's Visit (Temeraire/P&P with Bennet as an aviator)

Darcy's Surprise (sequel to the above fic)

Revenge of the Zillo Beast (Star Wars, Anakin-and-Mace-Windu Groundhog Day AU)

Far Above Rubies (P&P AU, Marry Bennet marries Mr. Collins and is quite happy)

5. do you respond to comments?

Yup! Or, at least, the ones that are more than an emoji or "second kudos!" I value those too, it's just ... what would I say?

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't tend to go in for angsty endings. But, as it happens, I did write an ending lately that was fairly dark.

Fertile Ground, Battlestar Galactica, Simon only bothered to continue the fertility experiments because the others demanded it. Things are different on New Caprica. Warnings for canon-typical ... everything

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

How would one even judge? I have 256 fics, most of which have positive endings of one sort or another.

8. do you get hate on fics?

Not really? Or, at least, it's probably happened sometime in the last 18 years, but I just deleted it and forgot about it. I am very lucky, I know other writers who've gone through hell.

9. do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope!

10. do you write crossovers?

I love crossovers! AO3 thinks I have 38, but a few of those aren't really crossovers, just different corners of the same universe, and one of them is the work that combines most of my Twisting the Hellmouth crossover drabbles into one drabble collection. (The ones where I had several drabbles in a sequence to tell a longer story, I separated out to each be their own fic.) Anyway, it averages out to about two a year, although I have not written as many in the last few years as I did earlier in my fic writing career. Most recently, I have:

A Spy on the Golden State Train (Miss Fisher/Agent Carter gen)

Undiscovered Stars (Star Trek/Star Wars, Lando Calrissian/James T. Kirk)

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Oh, sure, there have been a couple of times people have put some of my fics on those skeevy for-profit websites that pop up every now and again.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Twice! Both times into Russian. Though oddly enough, none of my Vorkosiverse fics have been translated into Russian. There is a very large and active Russian fandom for the Vorkosigan saga, so if I were going to predict which of my fics would be translated into Russian, it would be those. But no, the two that were translated are a DS9 fic, and a Doctor Who/Mary Poppins crossover.

Тридцать четвертое правило by Lazurit (The 34th Rule, DS9)

Завтра ветер переменится by Kollega (A Change in the Wind, DW/Mary Poppins)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

That's tough to answer. Does it include the ones that I abandoned, say, 15 years ago and haven't thought of since? I don't tend to post WIPs because I don't like them hanging over me.

Probably Hello, Piccadilly, Hello, Leicester Square, a Wonder Woman post-movie fic about Diana trying to figure out how to live in Man's World. I had a really great hook--they pass Diana off as a war bride--but no real idea where to go from there. Which is why it stalled out after only two chapters.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Worldbuilding, probably.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Endings and action. I am not good at writing either of them. The thing I am most likely to need a beta's help with is whether or not an ending feels like an ending or if I need to wrap things up better, and if so, what do I need to do to wrap things up. And action bores me, and it's really hard to write something that bores you, so I try to avoid needing to write it.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't speak any other languages, so I wouldn't do it! Unless maybe I had someone who had already volunteered to translate for me.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Stargate SG-1! It was a spitefic that I wrote because I was so annoyed by all the Broca AUs. "The Broca Divide" was an episode where they all turn into cavepeople, and as part of it Sam Carter kisses her commanding officer, Jack O'Neill, who then takes her to the infirmary before succumbing to the infection himself. There were a ton of fics about that where they have sex instead and she gets pregnant, and afterwards she keeps the baby and they get married and everything is fine and the team stays together and nobody cares about fraternization or anything.

(There were a LOT of Sam/Jack fics out there where like the President or whoever would call them up and say "oh, you're in love? awesome! we'll just waive all the regulations about having a romantic relationship with someone in your chain of command because you're so extra special and awesome. Which really annoyed me.)

Anyway, I got annoyed enough to write a fic where they sleep together as cavepeople and she gets pregnant and things are not fine, actually, there are consequences to it.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

lol

I can never figure out my favorite anything. If you give me five options, I could maybe narrow it down to the top two. Out of 256? You have got to be kidding me.

Tagging @tielan, @alexseanchai, @mihrsuri, @birdylion, @anghraine

[catbearexe]

BACK FROM LONG HIATUS! IF YOU ARE NOSY OR NEW, PLEASE READ!!!

WOW it has been such a long time since i've used this platform. I used to use this website to religiously to feed my anime and video game fan art addiction as well as share my artworks. Here's what I've been up to since!

My mental health took a massive nosedive into the void. I didn't think I was going to even make it through college at all. Though, I think that is pretty common during the COVID era, but my mental health as always been a problem wayyy before the pandemic.

I attempted to delete myself permanently on New Year's Eve of 2021, but I woke up to DIY surgery on arms, multiple bottles of empty liters of vodka, and unfortunately...still alive. When I came to around 5:00AM, I figured that I needed to leave my toxic environment and ended up staying at a friend's house for a few weeks before I started my first day at my first internship in the co-op program. I made a few drawings here and there and posted on my Instagram, but they never really made rounds and I had a long pause in drawing overall for a good couple of years due to being under an immense amount of stress, school, athletics, and working multiple jobs to stay afloat. I was eventually able to stay in a dorm. But, when the bill came around for the semester, all of my internship money went down the drain to pay for just staying on campus at my University despite not taking any classes. It was over $5000 dollars by the time the spring semester ended, and my university doesn't tell you the cost of dormitory until the last week of the semester.

I did get my first partner around 3-4 months of going no-contact with my family in 2022, and then ended it around New Years of 2023 due to their family having strong bigoted beliefs based on their faith in Christianity. It came to a great disdain to me that they never even knew what I looked like, or knew what my name was until 3 months after we separated despite being together for about 9 months prior. It also didn't help that I went cold-turkey on zoloft as it began to be too expensive (my psychiatrist was also very judgmental and made me feel ashamed and each 10-15 minute session was over $200 co-pay).

I decided (last second) to obtain my graduate degree in my university's accelerated program, allowing me to obtain my master's in engineering within a year instead of 2. During my final spring semester for my undergraduate program, I was taking classes for my bachelors, masters, and physics minor at the same time. Yet, I had a massive improvement in my performances athletic-wise despite the busy schedule and stress I amassed.

When I graduated with my bachelors degree, my mother decided to show up to my graduation unannounced and made a scene, screaming at the top of her lungs that she always supported me and tried kissing my face in front of my class and my beloved friends that I actually invited. For context, my family were my first and only bully. Before I was able to have my own bank account, any money that I made went straight to them and I would have to beg them to give me my money to buy anything. Additionally, they ripped through my mail and got very upset that I got into school at all. It was like I was expected to fail so hard to give them an excuse to get rid of me. It also happened to solidify that my parents now know that I am a transman as my university outted me unintentionally. The looks of disgust spread around me while I was trying to shove her off of me, and she never apologized due to her thought that "that is my DAUGHTER! I can do whatever I want!"

(I am a transman, and have been out for almost 8+ years at this point)

During my summer master classes, I was able to obtain another internship that was flexible to maintain during my time in the master's program and fit with my athletic schedule. That internship ended up becoming the most flexible and fun job I ever had and solidified the reason why I chose mechanical engineering as my career path.

However, during that summer I ended contact with a 10+ year group friendship. I knew that there had to be a time for work-life balance, but it felt impossible with the things I had on my plate. The immense guilt in having to prioritize my studies and survival over my long-term friends picked at me for years. I had to choose pulling irritated all-nighters with sleep problems or miss payments of over $550/MONTH for student loans as well as my schooling, rent, bills, etc. I had to sacrificed meals because of the cost and time to even eat.

A few weeks later, my grandfather on my mother's side passed away, and my mother broke down after the first mass how "I NEED you to forgive me" because she missed me and everybody kept asking her about me, making her look bad because of how I was just cut out of the entire family. She never calculated that people in real life actually cared about me, and it took everything inside of me to not blow up in her face. She is grieving, yet she only cared about how she was perceived by other people.

Regardless of the scholarship, which I was awarded in exchange for becoming a graduate assistant for the undergraduate courses, I ended up having to reach out to my father that I cut contact with to sign off on my loan as I had nobody. As much as I did not want to having not contacted them in almost 2.5 years, I didn't want to drop out of school and had no where else to turn to. So I did. My younger sister notified me that our beloved grandmother may not make it past 2024. It devastated me. I decided to break no-contact after years of estrangement and began to cautiously come back to visiting my grandmother's household where my parents resided. It was no surprise that their treatment wasn't any different than when I had left, and tried my best to keep it together for the sake of the only family member that treated me like a person.

On a random side note, I decided to try to put myself out in the dating field again about 8 months after my ex-partner and I separated. However, it has come to a disdain from my now ex-friendships that I went on dates with men instead of getting responses back from women (the street works both ways, I can't force women to go on dates with me). I eventually found myself in a confusing relationship with an infantry officer that lasted for about 3 months until he messaged if we were just friends and apologized if he is being confusing. A month later, a close friend of mine messaged me the Tiktok account of said-situationship obtaining a boyfriend shortly after he sent me that message. They also showed the demographic of their audience being creepy old men thirsting over an online thirst trap of someone who is in twink-death denial. When they texted me 9 months after we saw each other, I made sure I made them sweat by telling them that I knew about their secret account. As it turns out, their family is not only extremely Christian, but he and all of his siblings were homeschooled. His family does not even accept his current partner. Despite the whole fiasco he pulled, I couldn't help but still feel sorry for him as I was in the same position once.

The whole year of 2023 had me feeling like I was on top of the world. When Christmas came around, I was just stuck in another depressive episode for another 9 months. My athletic performance went on a massive decline, I was stuck in my room isolating myself, and I was struggling academically and was terrified that I would lose my scholarship. Despite all of this, I still passed, I got my degree, I got a full-time high paying job right out of graduate school, and moved into my apartment.

To put the nail in the coffin, my partner and I rekindled our relationship and now live together happily. I was terrified that I was going to lose him again after he moved in as I started testosterone the day after running in my last collegiate NCAA event of my life. The irritation, the mood swings, the h0rnY definitely put our relationship to the test. I even asked him if he even loved me at all. Even after me lashing out, being a terrible person, seeing me at my worst, he sat me down and talked to me. He communicated that if I have a problem with anything, I need to tell him directly. He assured me that we can be mad at things, but we will get through it and we will figure it out. In the first time of my life, I felt okay with accepting parts of me that are hard to deal with and never even knew about. The anger of everything eventually went away within about 3-4 months. We now happily live together, go on dates, and are now hoping to go on an out-of-country trip to Japan at some point.

While our relationships has solidified, my health had other plans. After 5 years of not seeing a doctor, I finally had the time and funds to seek help again. I found that the sarcoma, that I was diagnosed with all throughout high school, is in my right lung an grew 6 times the size in comparison to my last scan. My wisdom teeth in my right upper and lower jaw will need an evaluation from an oral surgeon because it seems to be fused to my skull and packed in, my lazy eye has gotten significantly worse and will need 10-12 days of no work from surgery. I used up most of my PTO to go to all of these appointments, only to find that I will need more than 2 sessions of surgeries because of neglecting my health for so long. Gotta thank the American healthcare system am I right?

When I got in touch with a therapist, they explained that my brain has been under excessive survival mode for too long that my window of tolerance is so miniscule. Wrong turn, spilling a cup of jawn, any minor mistakes could result in a massive meltdown as I am not used to being in an environment where there is little to no stress. Thankfully it has gotten A LOT better.

I also got in touch with a lot of schoolmates I have been meaning to hang out with. Turns out they had the same thought and were afraid that I didn't like them anymore because of their focus on schoolwork. This phenomenon of my friends in STEM losing friends due to academics was sadly a common theme, and I am so thankful that they understood that we both have stressful lives we are living. What a time to be in to laugh at each other having the same thought when it turned out we were in the same boat.

When my ex-friend reached out to me again about a year later, I felt the utter guilt of having to turn down their offer to reconvene as I had a LOT of oncology appointments and getting used to moving into a new apartment as well as my job while taking care of my sick grandmother. I had no furniture for 3-4 months, and was in great disdain when they guilt tripped me that I made them a low priority over my lung having another growing sarcoma along with spending my time with the only family member that treated me like a person.

Another downside I have found is that I may have girl-bossed too hard all of my life. I used to over-extend myself in social situations and use unfortunate coping mechanism to last over an hour. Now, it takes everything in me to go out in public, especially to my Muay Thai classes. I can't help but feel my arms tremble and heartbeat racing when I leave my little apartment space.

It is now 2025, my partner and I live happily together, I have reconnected with my hobbies, and can finally relax and enjoy myself without feeling the insane amount of dread of what is coming next. I am also currently figuring out where to get tested for autism and ADHD as my brother exhibited almost the same symptoms I did with the exception that my parents actually cared about him to get him therapy and medication (his meds barely hold him back).

Life is great, and I am so glad to be back!

[worldismyne]

was there any drama behind warrior u ending in the middle of an isuee?

Drama? Not really, more like, a series of unfortunate events.

The creator's computer crashed, destroying around 10-15 finished pages that had yet to be uploaded.

She was writing as she went, on an issue that was the origin story of the fan favorite villain, Hevvin. I think there was a lot of pressure to make it perfect, and when she went to go back and redo the pages, did what a lot of creators in her position would do. She second guessed the direction the issue was going and thought what she had made was 'terrible'.

She was very open about how she felt she wrote herself in a corner. She enlisted the help of fans to post one page fan comics while she decided what to do, and in the end, decided to end the series.

We were all sad, but from my POV, most people were understanding. It was a for free webcomic she had started in college and made 100s of pages for us. A lot of us had been in a position where we couldn't finish a fic or lost something we'd been working on to computer issues. It was just sad to see it happen to something on such grand of a scale.

A few years later, there was a problem with the webhost, and the official website for the comic died. She was also applying for animation jobs, which at the time the industry was very anti-fandom. So her DA and other galleries that had WU stuff incidently on it was deleted. Her WU blogs got caught in the shuffle, so we lost the original ask blog and concept art blogs. She made a new WU blog that has what she was able to save, but was very clear by 2020 she was ready to move onto a different project.

I can't stress enough how intensely parasocial the fans were by the series end with both her and the characters who'd been accessible through ask blog format since before tumblr (we have an archive of the old formspring for the blog, it's 30 webpages long, and that was just a fraction of it). She read and promoted any fan work that was made on the blog. Even posted the thumbnails for unfinished issues, and had been writing issues out of order.

There was a lot of pressure from the fanbase to make certain ships canon and Hevvin fans were half the fanbase (tumblr sexyman level obession). She was very clear what she would and wouldn't write, that she was pantsing the comic the entire run (no outline, just vibes) and by the series end there was so much pressure to appease the fans, I think the pages getting lost was the straw that broke the camel's back.

((For context, when all this was going down superwholock was on fire with fans harrassing people at cons over ship takes, homestuck was in full swing and fans of that would reach for other webcomics like WU during hiatuses. It was not a great time to 'let down' an audience on tumblr))

I wasn't on her end of the inbox, but I saw her get exhausted from demands to incoporate ships, headcanons, and update faster. It's one thing to get writers block after loosing a good chunk of work, it's another to have that happen in front of 10k+ fans who treat you like any old mutual.

She is aware of our efforts to revive the comic, but has been clear she's ready to move on to different projects. We did get a nice lil promo on the official blog.

Now she has a new comic series, where she works on one issue at a time. When the issues are done she posts them, when they aren't she talks in vague updates. Lately she's been focused on helping raise money to get people out of Gaza.

The orginal WU fandom is mostly gone, though we had a few pop in, nostalgic over the comic as we finished the unfinished issue. Atm we got about 99 peeps following on tumblr and consistent traffic on comic fury.

[agapi-kalyptei]

The water was warm that day. Of course, the water was 27 degrees, as it always was. 27.1 degrees. Friday 2pm. I disliked having to build a mental model of children's schedules, but here it was. Thursday 4pm. 13 year olds. 6pm 15 year olds. Friday 2pm 8 year olds. I didn't mind them conceptually, but they took 3 lanes at first, and another one at 3pm, and our side of the swimming pool was getting cramped.

I realized that being observant of random useless things is very typically ADHD. Not that I wasn't fully capable of being blind and clueless, but when you can't read a book while swimming, even when I do my best not to stare, there's all these Types of people that I find fascinating. I got quite used to being humbled by 65 year old ladies swimming laps left and right without a break, while I wait a minute on each end for my heart to calm down to under 120 bpm.

Today was better. Eating twice a day did miracles to my health, and so the water felt warmer than usual, and I didn't need to watch the heart rate so much. This time no elderly athletes. One weird looking guy "on the wrong side of 40" (as if there was a wrong side to being born on a timeline) who seems to have a habit of trying to make smalltalk with older ladies on the shallow end of the pool. He's a regular. A few unremarkable people. Then a pregnant lady climbed into the pool, wearing a bra instead of swimsuit.

I have learned not to question things, especially with not having close encounters with pregnant people. And of course by now I knew not to assume people's physical prowess based on their look. The pregnant woman, of course, was tearing through the pool at twice my speed; at first at least. Her presumed husband and kid were hanging out in the small pool. It brings me joy to see families together.

A kid took the lane next to me. I play a little game where I try to guess everyone's age. The strange thing about age is that even when I was 12 at some point (as embarrassing as that it is to admit), I don't really have a clue what someone that age would look like. I still barely have a clue what any age looks like. Sure as hell I'm not going to walk over and ask. "I'm trying to build a larger dataset and I need a point of reference." I'm not that autistic, I think. She was probably a cyborg anyway, swimming 2 kilometers by the time I did one lap. Doing that pretentious Andrew Garfield underwater roll at the end of the pool that I hate so much (<- jealous I can't do it).

As the kids training expanded to 66% of the pool, our crowded lane looked more like kesklinn on Friday after work. At some point an old lady asked something and I instinctively said "sorry I don't speak estonian" while pausing my music, to which she just replied "mida?" which gave me at least enough time to connect a dozen synapses and reply "ma ei räägi eesti keelt" and adding "sorry" before realizing I also know how to say that in Estonian.

I left early - only after swimming 1050 meters, which my idiotwatch thought was 675 meters, that liar, and went to buy more acrylics and inks, and cleaning supplies from biomarket. It's been a while, so I treated myself to peanut, almond and hazelnut cups, as if I haven't been treating myself with training website subscriptions and synths and books for a few days in a row. I'm alive. I'm alive. I'm alive. I can still do better tomorrow as long as I'm alive, I thought as I reminded myself of the progress I've made towards emotional stability, much in contrast with The Bell Jar's protagonist that was occupying my mind this week.

[queensparklekitten]

I found your web weave about last online 7 years ago and scp 1762 (And I Love It), and I noticed it said you can’t reblog unless you were from the SGE site. What is that exactly?

*looks up from my drink, in the corner of the bar*

So. You wanna know about the SGE site, huh? Well.

Once upon a time, there was an online community.

Fandom forum, though the Open Chat one (equivalent of a #general channel in a discord server) was by far the most used. You got a book you read when you were 12 that changed your life? SGE's the acronym for what was that book for me. You might've seen the movie adaptation on Netflix a couple years back. I really waited seven years for that... I'm getting off topic. Back to the website.

The userbase was in the 8-17 age range, 90% girls, many of us the kind of people who devoured books like it was nothing in our then-ongoing preteen years. The few moderators never even looked at us unless we reported a glitch, spammer, or bigot for them to deal with, so we had no adult supervision.

Open Chat was used for, among other things, the most chaotic unhinged roleplay you can imagine. We got really into it. Wild parties that lasted days, food fights that quickly escalated into the hunger games, everything to do with those living shadows, Bob the alien, the Potato Kingdom, many of us had pets or imaginary friends doing this alongside us, I'm barely scratching the surface here, if I were to try to explain it all we'd be here for weeks. Quoting the Bee Movie script or singing certain songs had a tendency to cause all hell to break loose paranormally, one time it opened a portal to the underworld. It was the most fun ever. There was a reason we'd greet newcomers with "try not to die".

Aside from the chaos, there was contests where we'd reply with images of dresses or cute animals or what else have you, lots of clubs based around various things, people would sing (post song lyrics, sometimes roleplaying whole flashy performances) and post fun questions for everyone to answer and stories and neat videos we found and really good poetry and so, so much more that we didn't archive because we just assumed it would always be there.

It's where I met a lot of my closest friends- hell, it was the only place where I regularly got invited to participate in anything. I don't think there's anyone on that site who didn't forge friendships there. It's also how I got into quite a lot of songs and books and shows, and how I learned HTML formatting. That site was my home. It was the best part of my life for years.

You know how online friends are, though. Sometimes they disappear without a trace, a warning, or an explanation. Or their parents forbid them from going on the site because they think online chat rooms are dangerous.

I joined at 12. By the time I was nearing age 15, most of my friends had disappeared without a trace, never to return. I was one of the very few users to join in 2016 who was still active. The site wasn't abandoned, there were new people everywhere, but...

I don't pretend to understand the why of it, but the magic just. Started fading, I suppose. The community was falling apart. The roleplay got more stale and repetitive and often died down before it went anywhere. It all slowly declined and decayed and became a shell of itself. A hollow mimicry of what we once had. It wasn't really fun anymore, and I found myself wondering what was left to stay for. Just got worse in this regards, up until the website's final days, even after the rest of the userbase started becoming aware of it.

Eventually one day, the Open Chat started glitching hard. It had done that before, many times, and always been fixed. That time, though, it went down for repairs and never came back up. They said they'd bring it back, and they never did. Here's the thing, though- our posts all disappeared. When other forums on that website got closed around then, we could still see the posts by going through our post histories, we just couldn't reply to them. Open Chat and every last record of what we did there just vanished entirely, like it never existed.

It never even got crawled by the Wayback Machine.

...Now that I mention it, tomorrow's actually the anniversary of when Open Chat went down... how the FUCK was that five years ago it does NOT feel like it's been anywhere near that long.

Anyways.

During this time, the very few (like, there was maybe 2 at most) moderators had begun responding to drama by banning offsite links, followed by, several months after we lost our Open Chat, banning off-topic (non-SGE-related) discussions entirely, which sparked riots and a petition and they knew what it meant to the userbase, even to newer people who'd only known the comparatively lifeless version, we told the admins as hard as we could, and they did nothing. Well, other users told them anyways. I knew the site was beyond saving and thus didn't do anything but listen to music and make "let me guess, your home?" memes.

We also lost the ability to make posts in our profiles that weren't in any forums but could be seen if you went through the user's post history.

The official end was the "revamp" of the website, that was just a shutdown. They deleted everything that was left of it and all the records of what we were, and made a completely new website that the old one's url now redirects to. Though at least this time they had the courtesy to announce it a month and a half in advance so we could load as much as we could of what remained into archive.org during those weeks. There's no forum feature on the new site, and user data wasn't transferred. I never made an account on the new site. Why would I?

You can probably guess by reading those lyrics and asofterworld screencaps that I, and at least some other users I'm still in contact with, never really got over the death of that community.

That last image in my webweave is a screenshot of the page that now comes up whenever you type in the url for a forum or an old site member's profile and hit enter.

[fillejondrette]

been going through my economist backlog and thought people on here might be interested in this article. i remember hearing about a lawsuit by the WLF a few years ago but it wasn't going anywhere at the time.

In the spring of 2023 Jennifer Barela returned to her cell at the Central California Women’s Facility (CCWF) in Chowchilla to find “a large man” sitting there. Her new cellmate had been sentenced to life in prison in 1982 for murder, had changed name, self-identified as a woman and been transferred to CCWF.

Other female inmates have had similar experiences since California passed law SB132 in 2020, allowing prisoners to be housed according to self-defined “gender identity” not biological sex. The law does not require them to change their body before transferring, and then lets them request their cellmate. When it was passed, Shawn Meerkamper of the Transgender Law Centre (TLC) said, “This bill is a necessary…harm-reduction measure that will allow our trans family to seek safer situations while incarcerated.” Trans inmates have spoken of the benefits. In other states, too, laws and policies are allowing a trickle of trans prisoners to transfer.

But some female prisoners claim that inmates from men’s prisons are gaming the new system and that a small but growing number of men convicted of violent and sexual crimes are being locked in cells with women. Some women’s groups warn that other proposed laws could turn this initial trickle into a flow. A bill at committee stage in New York state would “presumptively” house inmates based on their self-declared “gender identity”.

“We are not against trans people,” says Ms Barela, who was released last year after serving 15 years. “But we are against those pretending to be transgender, who are predators, to get into a women’s prison, where there is lots of prey.” The website of the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation (CDCR) says that 42 inmates have been transferred from men’s to women’s prisons since 2021, with more than 100 applications under review.

SB132 allows transfers to be turned down for “management or security” reasons; CDCR says 83 inmates have been denied. A review by California’s prison inspector in 2023 “did not substantiate any allegations of sexual assault”, but it “sustained numerous allegations of consensual sexual misconduct between transferees and other incarcerated people”. Many female inmates “reported witnessing transferees abusing their romantic partners”. After the report was published Tremaine Carroll, a transferred inmate serving 25 years to life for violent crimes, was charged with raping two women in CCWF and faces trial soon; Carroll denies the charges. In 2022 an inmate moved to Rikers Island women’s prison in New York received a seven-year sentence for attempted rape.

CDCR responds that all requests “are reviewed by a multidisciplinary classification committee chaired by a warden”. It adds that “CDCR has a zero-tolerance policy for sexual abuse.” But the inspector’s report admits that, if a person with a history of raping women applied to transfer to a women’s prison, the wording of the law “may prohibit the department from denying the person’s transfer request” based solely on their “history of raping women”.

Women’s Liberation Front, a campaign group, is challenging the legality of SB132. In a statement, TLC and the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) said: “Transgender women are women and unfortunately CDCR has a…history of failing to protect…the transgender women and the cisgender women in its custody.” It went on: “We will fight to ensure that…the constitutionality of SB132 is zealously defended.”

A freedom-of-information request in May by Keep Prisons Single Sex, another campaign group, found that 48% of the 1,433 inmates in federal male prisons who identify as women are there for sex offences, nearly four times the share in the general prison population. (The share is also high in Britain, where 74% of those in male prisons who identify as women are in for sex offences or violent crimes; and in Canada, where, in 2017-20, 86% of “gender diverse” inmates were violent offenders and 33% had a history of sexual crimes.) Furthermore, inmates identifying as women in federal male prisons are three times as likely as the general prison population to be classed as high-security.

Still, in federal women’s prisons only nine inmates have come from male prisons. In California, another public-records request found that 34% of the 287 inmates in state men’s prisons who applied in 2022 to transfer to its women’s prisons were registered sex offenders.

Undoubtedly some transgender prisoners are vulnerable. TLC says that “prisons and jails routinely subject transgender people in their care to…harassment, sexual assault and violence”. The inspector’s report said 19 of the 22 inmates transferred, and 16 of the 28 due to be, said that they had been victims of violence because of their gender identity; 20 of the 22, and 17 of the 28, said they had been threatened. Some change is now happening, as trans inmates win lawsuits for being denied “necessary” medical care.

The women’s groups point out that women are vulnerable, too, and should not be put at risk in order to protect vulnerable inmates in men’s prisons. Studies in 2016 and 2017 found that nearly 90% of women in American prisons are victims of previous sexual assault. Help from civil-rights groups is scarce. In response to an inquiry about inmates moving from male to female prisons in Washington state, the ACLU sued to block release of the data. ■

[downhillride]

Just words!

I can't remember the age when I last felt lost, I know it was preteen. I'm 67 now, stumbling through capitalist medicine "treatments", a cancer that is going to end functioning. So far, it's been a two and a half year process, though in February, the negligence of the "wrong" treatment from Washington University and Barnes Jewish was solidified a bit (an under-statement).

The mentioned "treaters" did lots of testing before treating, even as a layman, I understood from numerous articles and publications at the NIH website that the treatments were not premium, But the pushed treatment was Keytruda, which works for HPV 16positive, the incentive was/is a billion dollar contract on one drug produced by Merck and it has demonstrated notable acceptable resolution rates for 16positive.

Treatment modality chosen for me was an obvious known error, done for revenue, obviously, perhaps as a possible a controlled, observed outcome substantiation.

I'm old school, I'm still amazed that at not one of the 9 medical institutions I've "visited" over the past nearly three years, NOT ONE has displayed the Hippocratic Oath, though I've seen lots of crosses coupled to Thumper purveyors. I've only experienced a handful of medical "professionals" that are more concerned about effective care, rather than profits.

In a week, neurology is going to begin their endeavors, perhaps they will lead to a few more years for my daughter and I to continue our bonding that started at her birth. Depending on where things stand, I can have either several months, a year or, if fortunate, perhaps two years. From my reading and comprehension, I'm expecting no longer than perhaps another 15 months. Everyone one have a great day :)

[rigelmejo]

Dreaming Spanish, Paper of 1200 hours learning French only watching shows, Personal Notes

So I signed up for Dreaming Spanish's site yesterday. However: it quickly became clear I have absolutely no time for studying something on top of Japanese and Chinese so. I will not get to use it much.

The good: their website is very nice, I think. The free videos are listed, and part of all collections, and they can track on the website how many minutes/hours you've watched and skip videos you've watched before if you wish. Meaning if you're using DS videos to study, going on their site is useful if you watch on a computer or phone, because their site will track your minutes watched for the day and put on a playlist for you for your language level. So it requires much less navigation and keeping track from you compared to the youtube site. I am super bad at tracking time doing X and what video I was on in youtube, so these features are awesome. It also tells you how many days it will take to reach each study level they have.

I think this is a super good tool to keep you realistic, and accountable to your own personal goal. If you only set your goal on DS to the learner option of 30 minutes a day (do NOT set it to 15 minutes a day), then you're looking at hitting goals at these points: you'll know 1500 words in 299 days, you'll know 5,000 words in 1,199 days (~3.3 years), and you'll be level 7 comparable to a native speaker in 2,999 days ~8.2 years). As you can see... 8.2 years is comparable to maybe if you took Spanish all through elementary school for 30 minutes a day (if that elementary school spanish was an immersion class). Now, languages take years to learn no matter what, and sometimes it will just have to look like 8 years for you (I'm studying Japanese and definitely getting close to that lol, and if I only had 30 minutes to study I'd obviously have to settle with the pace I can do). But if you study 2 hours a day, you can make a huge amount of progress in just 2 years (see below).

If you set it to 120 minutes per day (2 hours, like I tend to recommend for decently paced progress) then you'll know 1,500 words in 75 days (great progress from absolute beginner to able to start doing basic graded readers and learner podcasts if you want, and about where I got to when self studying in Chinese in the first few months), you'll learn 5,000 words in 300 days (less than a year!) at which point slow native speakers talking and books for children should be understandable (and shows will almost be without any word lookups, easier shows like cartoons and daily life romance may be). That's AMAZING progress for less than a year. I know for an English speaker, learning French or Spanish takes less time to understand... but I forgot how much less time. I guess my Chinese progress was only a little slower but I did a lot of 4+ hour study days the first year. And you'd get to DS Level 2 comparable to a native speaker in 750 days (just over 2 years).

That's a perfectly snappy progression, to be honest with you. People complain that comprehensible input lesson plans/ALG plans take 1500-2000 hours (DS takes 1500 hours), but the Foreign Service institute suggests 750 hours in class for Spanish then another 750 outside of class study, which is 1500! Same time period FSI suggests. For Thai it recommends 1100 class hours and 1100 out of class study, which is 2200 hours. So the CI lesson plans/ALG plans take about as much time as FSI estimates it takes their learners, the difference appears to be that ALG plans just do NOT include in any outside time spent studying. (A note: Dreaming Spanish does suggest doing lots of listening outside of their materials, but gives you the option to log that time on their site, so I am guessing outside listening you understand the meaning of would count toward their hours required of study).

Anyway, back to my point about Dreaming Spanish's tracking: I deeply appreciate how it shows you the goal study time per day you set, how much you're actually reaching it (so you know if it's unrealistic for you), and how long the milestone goals of understanding should take if you study at your goal study time per day. I think this tool on their site is incredibly useful. And even the Levels area on it's own, listing hours to get to each level and what you should be able to do at it, is quite good as a guide for what you should expect as a language learner.

Their guide matches up fairly well with what I could do in French, Chinese, and Japanese at various levels, very well. I read earlier and watched shows earlier than the guide suggests - I started when I was between level 2 and level 3 (so when I knew between 300-1500 words... I usually start graded readers ASAP so I started Chinese graded readers at 500 words studied, and with Japanese I waited longer than usual and read them at 1500-2000 words but read manga before that ToT, with French I started graded readers at 300 words and normal reading material at 1500 words... but also keep in mind, I was looking words up whereas the DS method does NOT suggest you look any words up, so me looking words up likely made harder materials like novels and shows understandable at an earlier point). And I found French reading material readable with no dictionary around level 4 (far earlier than DS suggests native speaker reading material being doable), I found Chinese shows understandable without word lookups earlier for me around level 4 (earlier than DS suggests - but I tolerate ambiguity okay and am Great at guessing new things from context, it's my favorite way to learn).

Semi Related things:

I read a whole paper a man wrote about learning French entirely through shows for 1200 hours, then an additional 300 hours of talking to people in French, a little grammar conjugation table reading and wikipedia in french reading and comic reading, and taking the B1 and B2 test and passing at the conclusion of 1500 hours. I recommend reading it if interested, I found it fascinating. The man looked up NO WORDS AT ALL in the first 1200 hours. The man did not pre-study much, he did not even know French was not spelled phoenetically much until 1200 hours in when he finally saw the writing system. He switched to watching cartoons a couple hundred hours in, because he could figure out new word meanings much faster with the direct visual context for what characters said (compared to shows for adults having discussions of things not happening on screen), and switched to shows for adults later once his vocabulary rose. (*Note: I did something similar with Chinese, I started with action wuxia because they would say 'get her/grab it/kick him/run/fight me/she's X' and I could learn a LOT of verbs and nouns by guessing instead of having to look up words every minute, back in that early point... action shows generally do more describing of whats actually on screen happening, and then comedic romance daily life shows, if you don't want to watch cartoons). His experience was brutal, he watched 5 hours on average a day, paid attention and made concious guesses of new words and features. It worked though!

And it is a great point to use as comparisons. His method worked, so the ALG/CI method type lessons should work as they are also 'watching audio visual' stuff in the language. While also being LESS exhausting than what this man did, since the ALG/CI lessons are structured to make it much easier to figure out new word meanings without as much uncertainty, are spoken slower to be understandable to learners, and are designed to teach you specific vocabulary and grammar.

He mentioned in his method, that if he were to do it again, he thinks he'd make faster progress if he'd allowed himself to 1. watch with French subtitles (to work on reading skill at the same time as listening), and 2. to look up words meanings to compare with the guesses he was making so he could quickly confirm correct meanings and move on.

I personally, based on my own experience, think he was somewhat right in thinking this and ALSO somewhat wrong. What I think is true about his guess that looking up words would've sped up the process: I know it does, I learned 2000 Chinese words in 6 months, then another thousand at least in the next 6 months, and while I cram studied an SRS app for 2 weeks (and 2 review) I think the bulk of reinforcement of remembering was me watching shows and confirming word guesses by looking up key words. If I'd done zero SRS app, and just watched shows from day 1, I would've looked up 1 keyword per minute at first probably. And it would've got me a similar pace of progress. I learned all my Chinese vocab after that first SRS app cram, by looking words up as I read or watched stuff. It definitely sped up progress. In French, I took 6 months to get where that guy got in 1 year... I was reading instead of listening mind you (and listening seems harder), but looking up words sped up my ability to comprehend more faster.

I think his assumptions about watching with French subtitles were wrong though: I think while subtitles DO help with reading (helped my Chinese reading a ton), I think (especially with similar alphabet languages - if you know another language uses that alphabet too) seeing the written form gives your brain more space to sub-vocalize the WRONG pronunciation mentally. You tend to prioritize reading subs over hearing actual dialogue, and so also I think you'll fail to develop the skill of parsing real muddled and slurred and muffled and sped up together language as fast as learners who do NOT use subtitles. When I watch Chinese shows without subtitles I have a noticeably more difficult time parsing what's said, and when I watch audio dramas and audiobooks I feel a whole comprehension level Lower than I feel when reading a book. I'm years into studying and specifically working on my ability to parse speech with no reading aid, so that's what only watching with subtitles did for me lol. (Also in French, I can't comprehend listening anywhere close to how well I can read, but that's more of an example of "what happens if you study primarily through reading and ignore listening skills"). So I think while practicing reading and seeing the spelling of new words IS useful (especially if you desire to train reading skill), it's also useful to spend at least SOME time watching shows or listening to audio with no subtitles or transcript to rely on... to practice parsing the sounds.

I did find it interesting he picked up reading so quickly, after all the work on listening. I had personally hoped, that learning to read things you already know in listening, might be easier to do than learning to read Brand New words. Based on his experience, this seems true. And I'm hoping I can eventually do something similar with Japanese... have a listening skill above my reading skill, and then work on reading (but either way I plan to use reading-listening at once, so even if there's new words in reading I don't want to develop a totally wrong pronunciation guess in my head).

And then, a note about Dreaming Spanish and my personal experience with Spanish: When I actually watch the Dreaming Spanish videos, it's the Intermediate Level videos that feel correct for me - I hear some new words and can understand/guess them in the context of the video, they speak at a pace I find understandable, they're not so boring I want to tune out, they're not so difficult I feel exhausted (interestingly when I checked out Lazy Chinese the intermediate level feels easier than this but a comfortable 'easier' spot for listening skills, and Comprehensible Japanese's intermediate videos feel a bit more focus-intensive for me than Dreaming Spanish's but also provide the right amount of new stuff to learn in context). I would assume knowing some French helps A TON with comprehending Spanish, and I have read several Spanish nonfiction books and don't find trouble with nonfiction (fiction Spanish books have enough unknown words though that I do need to look things up). I did also read Madrigal's Magical Key to Spanish self-study book back in college, and do a few months of Language Transfer Spanish podcast, so I saw a couple thousand cognates and basic grammar rules from those.

Anyway... I just find it curious that the actual content Dreaming Spanish has, I don't feel Superbeginner matches me despite being a beginner overall. The Superbeginner videos do have new words for me (tall, old, eyes, head, nose, hand), with context they're immediately understandable of course. Then also: some of them sound just like French to me or like words I've heard before. Garden is jardin, like french. Apprend is learn, like french.

Another interesting thing I noticed... some Spanish accents are easier for me to parse than French. I'm not super surprised, because that summer I was focusing on Spanish in college on my own, the goal was to MAKE IT SOUND DIFFERENT than French in my head, because mentally I'd confuse spanish and french when reading. I succeeded and developed a better ear for Spanish, and a slightly better ear for French (but clearly not as much as Spanish now that I'm hearing Spanish and parsing words better than I do in French). There's a few Spanish accents that feel almost as difficult as French to parse - the JARDIN video accent, with J like a Y but a way different Y sound than the French jardin threw me off a lot. The dropping of certain letters pronunciation also confused me... I think Spanish maybe does some ll sounds as y/i sound, so maybe that's what I heard? And the 'th' sound instead of s, my ears struggled with but I was more aware to look out for that in Spain pronunciation.

Then again, who knows how much my knowledge of French was simply interfering with Spanish: making a lot of cognates way easier to understand, but making certain pronunciations harder to parse. That could be both what helped and what makes things more confusing to me.

I have no time to study Spanish or French right now, so I can't really dive into what kind of work it would take to separate French and Spanish more in my head (but apparently they do need to be more firmly separated...still, in pronunciation). But it was interesting to see that effect.

[thepaleys]

History has always fascinated me. I like looking at the past and discovering the pieces that led us to where we are today. But what truly fascinates me is how a single event, sometimes even a random coincidence, a stroke of luck (or bad luck) can change the course of History forever.

What if Henry VIII and Catherine of Aragon had a son? Would England still be a Catholic country? What if Franz Ferdinand and his wife had not been shot in an alley? What if Adolf Hitler had not left the room a few minutes after an explosion that could have ended his life?

Like many children born in the 1990s, I was also fascinated by the animated movie "Anastasia", which famously explores one of these "what if" scenarios. What if one Romanov had survived the brutal execution of the family in 1918?

The movie itself was enough to stir my imagination, but, after I learnt the real story in a History class many years later, I was hooked for life. The sheer tragedy of it all. A close-knit family, a kind Tsar who could not handle the pressures of his position, Alexei's illness, Rasputin's influence, his assassination, the family's ultimate demise. For the first years of this new-found interest, I read extensively about Nicholas II and his family.

At the same time, I had taken an interest in the so-called 'Golden Age' of Hollywood. I started watching movies from the 1950s, the 1940s and, finally, the 1930s. It didn't take long for me to discover George Cukor and all his fantastic collaborations with Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant. And, as I was going through his movies, I eventually arrived at a less known work called "Sylvia Scarlett".

As I always do when I finish watching a movie, I headed over to the IMDb page to check information about the movie and cast. And then, as I was going through this, I discovered that one of the actresses, Natalie Paley was a Romanov! Well, not a full Romanov, but she was the granddaughter of Alexander II, and her father and brother had both been killed during the Russian Revolution.

Reader, little did I know that this would mark the beginning of a life-long interest in the Paleys, the morganatic family of Grand Duke Paul Alexandrovich of Russia.

It's not an easy task to find information about them and that's probably the reason why it has taken me so many years to gather what I have. It's a constant chase in order to have a clearer picture of their lives, their personalities, their tragedies.

At the same time, my mind could never stay still while I uncovered their lives and I was always wondering how their lives could have turned out if there hadn't been a revolution.

After a while, I discovered the perfect outlet to let my imagination run at a little website called Pan Historia, on a collaborative fiction work called The Romanovs: One Last Dance. On and off and through many personal changes and tragedies on my own personal life, I've been writing there for 15 years.

However, over the last year, I felt the need to pick up all the loose ends, give structure to what I have and start my own story, in the hopes that I can finally finish it, close this chapter of my life and move on to different things.

This blog will document that journey. I will share all the information I gathered over the years about the Paleys, as well as other characters based on real people from the 1920s and early 30s that participate in this story.

If you like Alternate Histories, I invite you to take a look at what I have published so far at Wattpad. But even if you don't and are just interested in the Romanovs, the Paleys or even the Romanian royal family, this might be an interesting corner of Tumblr for you.

Hop along on this journey with me!

[ruhigrose]

Hi! I love your artwork, and wanted some art tips coz my art skills are shit.

Any tips for someone who is trying to get into sketching and watercolours?

also, did i mention that i love your work?

💕💕

🥺 Thank you!!

For tips I would say always use references, it can be one picture for reference or ten.

For sketching, look at your sketch in a mirror. It sounds weird but it helps me find things that were bothering me but I couldn’t figure or what.

Take breaks! If you step away from your art for a while, an hour or a day, it helps my eyes relax and refresh so when I go back I can resume with a fresh perspective.

For watercolor, I myself are following free weekly classes on an online website. Im still super new to watercolor, and having a class and person to follow really helps me get going. I struggle to start something if I have no idea how to start and finish. This way Im getting more confidence and feel like I can go and do my own ideas!

When you are drawing or doing any sort of art you will have a different feeling every piece. Your skills progress while your brain learns and finds new things you know you made a mistake or could do better. Its a part of learning! And it will feel frustrating at times, all artists go through this no matter the skill level.

Heres a few old pictures that are 15+ years old. We all start somewhere! I believe in you :)