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skyrigel · 4 months ago

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“The Great War Part-3”

Part 1 || Part 2 || Benjicot masterlist

Pairing: Benjicot “Davos” blackwood x Bracken!reader

~ When mist of past finally clears up and you are faced with an ineffable truth of life, you reach for your darling husband's hand, surviving the great war [ wc : 4.7k]

๑⁠˙⁠❥⁠ 18 + nsfw, p in v ( rough ), missionary position, breeding kink, blood kink, size kink, fingering, c- word used in sexual context, orgasm denial, first time, love confessions, jealousy, confused feelings, poetic subtexts, bad writing?! Proofread

I might write an epilogue someday but this is it, thankyou everyone for reading and following along, also this is for @ihateitheretaylor for our three years of surviving the great war by reaching for each other, love you to the moon and saturn.

Benji's whole face glittered under the weirwood tree, his hand inevitably touching his heart as he saw you.

Your maiden cloak adored in golden and silver embroidery, house's sigil glistening, a red stallion in golden fields, like the strands of your future husband's hair that were blazing against the sun.

His grin absolutely splited his whole face, lines stretching wide as he gazed at you walking towards him with your brother.

“ Who comes ? ” His smile true to his words,

“ Who comes before the gods ? ”

Aeron paused for a moment before he looked at you, his arms brushing your shoulder as he nodded, a tight smile but a smile indeed.

“ Y/n of House Bracken, comes here to wed. A woman trueborn and noble, she comes to beg the blessings of gods. Who comes to claim her ? ”

Benji raised his chin, instantly looking back at you like he couldn't get enough and for a fact—he really couldn't

“ Me, Benjicot Davos blackwood of House blackwood, lord of Raventree halls, I claim her.” He winked at you, “ Who gives her ? ”

Aeron took your hand, his smile genuine when he glanced back at you.

“ Aeron Bracken of House Bracken, Brother of lady y/n, son of Lord Amos Bracken.” He turned to you, blinking back the watery haze, you gulped down the lump in your throat.

“ Lady y/n, Do you take this man ? ”

Your face grew warm, and there were many realisations in life, some slow and crashing as waves, some quick and bold as lightning, when you looked back at the man who was going to be your husband, the man you remembered from a long time ago, a distant memory and sometimes as though it was taken from yet another lifetime— his youthful face, bright eyes, chortling laughter that echoed through your soul. So many years gone in punishing him for something he never did, cursing him as you sleep talked.

So when you saw him, it struck you soft as a breeze, hard as a blow; you would love him so much, perhaps you already love him or perhaps there was still time but it will eventually come your way, and you will love him so deeply, so, so much that the oceans would be jealous, you will love him so blazely that the sun would burn in agony, so luminous that the stars would be envious.

That's the way you would love him, and it wouldn't be faith that will tie your hearts and bind your souls today, it will be a choice, his and yours to not be parted, not even death could do so. You smiled, no longer fighting your blush and letting it crimson your cheeks.

“ I take this man.” You said for the all the gods to know, him, who stands here with his goofy smile, too big for his face, him, who calls you darling while you roll your eyes, he's is the one, you would have him.

Benji reached for your hand, joining your souls together through the tips of his fingers, Aeron backed away as you and Benji kneeled against the old gods, head leaned together.

“ I vow to protect you, to honour and love you, to respect and support you, my darling wife.” no yet, He had chosen you already, a very long time ago.

His thumb smeared across your knuckles, voice dripping with sincerest affection.

“ I vow to stand with you, in life and death and what follows after, to be with you in bad nights and good days.”

Your heart was beating too fast, grasping this moment to be forever your reality, it scared you how you had no control, you chose him because there was nothing else you could do—there was going to be no you without him.

A day ago you hated how much he tormented you, hated how much he ached your heart with his sweet honey like words.

And now you hate him how truly alive he could make you feel, like he has set your soul on fire, his laugh booming across the bloodshed while you're reaching for his hand.

“ I will always love you, my lady. In days when I would forget life, breath and myself— i would remember you like an oath.”

Benji pressed his forehead against yours, taking half your misery—half your pain.

“ From this day...” You said along with him, smile tugging at the corner of your lips,

“ till forever falls apart.” Benji smiled, side glancing Aeron and his glea only rippled more.

“ Can I kiss my bride ? ” He asked you, soft as a whisper and you blinked, hands sweaty in his, entwined for lifetimes to come.

“ You may.” You said, closing your eyes and even then you could feel his giddiness that rushed into you, the press of his lips against yours, it wasn't feral, it wasn't bloody, it was as sweet and as gentle, like the poets would say.

Perhaps it was Aeron's throat that cleared itself so loudly that blinked open your eyes, feeling your knees ache in the tendons.

“ You look so beautiful darling.” Benji winked, helping you get up—his tongue caught between his teeths— removing the husk from your gown.

And just like that, he was your man now.

~~~

The wedding was small but the feast that followed was wild, everyone was drunk and happy, it was truly a blackwood and Bracken wedding, one should have seen the smirk that passed between Bracken's when blackwood's pretty girls started serving wine, pouring up to brims with their sweet sly smiles and curvy beautiful bodies.

And ofcourse it wasn't missed how prideful blackwood's were being with their extraordinary arrangements, nose red and tongue loose with alcohol.

“ Bout' time laddie, bout' time—” One of the blackwood knight's chortled, patting his company with enough force to make his food come back on surface, “—should've seen his face...saw him in between bloody battle and oh lordie— should've seen the little Rat, squeezing between,” He made little vague gestures from his greasy hands, “ like a cunty little —”

“ Oh shut up, will you ! ” the said little rat of his tales snapped back at him, his Bracken mates laughing while he fumed with a red face.

“ Amusing, isn't it ? ” Benji leaned to your ear, making you shiver when his mouth grazed your ear shall, “ My heart, my shine, my darling beloved wife.”

“ Very amusing...” You said, turning to him and his beautiful face, pink on his tips, hair sticking to his forehead and a grin only fools in love had, but their on the corner of his mouth sticked a crumb, you shouldn't, really, but then you saw how Raventree hall's ladies saw him, their lusty gazes and seductive smiles, even now, they would bloom like a flower if his drunk sloppy gaze merely sprinkled by, like many realisations that followed today, this was also one of them, the one that wanted to tear away those prying eyes and keep him all to yourself, to burn those heart that desired for him, to ruin those dreams that they staged, he was yours, your husband, your lord, and you were his, his wife, his lady, and when the great war comes, it will be his hand that you will reach for, only his.

“ Here—” You blushed, “ let me.” You smeared away the crumb with the soles of your fingers, smiling a small, you don't remember watching the sun rise in the long time but if anything, it would be the way Benji smiled in that moment, forever mesmerizing.

As if on cue, your golden moment was ruined when Martha came over, she was daughter of lord in court, it was evident with the silk on her body, and her sweet calculated smile, something only courts knew.

“ It is so gracious to meet you, Lady y/n Bracken—”

“ It's lady Blackwood.” Your fork penetrated deeper into meat, “ Now.” you added with a smile, Martha nodded, her jaw hardening.

“ Ofcourse, Lady blackwood.” she tilted her head, fiddling with the chain on her neck, Benji was watching your sloppily, leaning on your shoulder and despite he was quite heavy, you weren't going to tell him that.

“ Congratulations, It is really credible what you did...to tie the two house together, a duty not anyone could do.” She bit her lower lip, shifting her sharp eyes to Benji who was putting more crumbs on his mouth, looking back at you with his chin raised.

You knew where she was getting at, duty and honour, to rub it on your face that this marriage is loveless, that it's just a duty that would end with two or three babes and forever isolation in chambers, but she didn't knew what you did, she didn't know the love that was swirling, had been, for the longest time, since one of these feasts with slurred laughters and nonsensical conservations where you saw each other.

“ Ben...” You pouted, ignoring her forced flashing of teeths, doing away the crumbs on his mouth while he fancied leaning in to kiss your tips, “ I am tired...can we—”

“ Darlin’ me too, shall we ? ”

It took a lot of nerves to not to burst in laughter the way Benji hurriedly got up, almost knocking his elbow in Aeron's face who sighed, but also smiled when he saw you watching your beloved husband.

You wondered where the wine was gone when he hooked your elbows together, all the while Martha hissed under her breath, haughty faced.

“ I wasn't expecting that...” You huffed, glancing at Benji, he was buzzing in excitement, practically floating mid air.

“ I...Martha was actually my first.” He shaked his head, rubbing the bridge of his nose, all colours drained out of your face, your knuckles clenched to bloodless flesh.

“ You know what I mean ? ” He asked, staggering behind you while you increased your pace, blinking back rapidly.

“ Ofcourse I do.” You snapped, not bothering to keep low in the dark of the tower, footsteps echoing through the night.

“ Okay, right...I wanted you to know—”

“ That you slept with another woman ? ” you turned around to him, his body knocked against you and in some other time, it wouldn't matter much, a forehead bump but he was drunk, you were angry, and times were changing, as both of your bodies tumbled down, he caught you by the waist, shifting you on top of him, a loud thud and soft ‘oof’ and a whimpered groan that was your own.

“ Are you okay, darling wife ? ” You pushed back the hair that crept out of your braid before you looked at him, propped on his elbows rested back, you shifted aside, letting your body fall next to him on the hard cold floor.

“ Yeah...you ? ”

Instead of answering you, Benji snorted first and then an absolute wave enveloped him, he was crackling with laughter, chest shaking as he glanced at you, turning away to clutch at his chest.

“ What's so funny ? ” You raised your brow, he shaked his head, taking the gods name in vain.

“ Oh Darling...” He flipped to your side, face to face as his eyes crinkled, watering at the sides, face flushed with rosiness and devil taking over his mouth. Soft and warm and pink.

“ You,” He whispered to you, taking your chin between your fingers and raising it towards him, “ are all the more breathtaking when you're jealous.” and here it was, the word, the feeling that roared like a monster on loose to destroy anyone who as so looked at Benji, a very feral twisting of heart.

“ No.” You lied, He shaked his head, leaning in, breath sweet and warm, you knew what that mouth was capable of, to kiss him was confetti bursting in your mind.

“ Liar.” He declared, gazing into your eyes and an ineffable pull broke lose, your lashes fluttered and the next moment he was kissing you and you were kissing him back.

The feral beast inside you said, devour him, make him yours, let him forget all the ones that came and gone, let it be you, only you.

You never knew how something could be more precious than air, a stiffled whine escaped your throat as he pulled away, catching a breath, grin dancing around his mouth, teasing you to catch — you weren't the one to turn down mockery, grabbing the side of his face and pulling him to you.

“ Oh my love...” He hummed inside your mouth, battling you for domination, tongue swiping across your lower lip.

He slided his hand in under your thigh, pulling you to his lap, he was dazed and drunk but in that moment, nothing could be sober more, when he picked you up from the floor without breaking a sweat and only sticking his tongue out when you watched him wide eyed.

“ I hate you.” You said, the feeling that clenched inside you was same as that unsettling tug in your navel when you spent your nights dreaming about him, when you touched his bloodied face, when you tasted his blood on your finger tips, it left it's mark, your thighs weak at the sensation that pulled inside your spine.

“ I can drop you.” He swayed your body in his arms, taking the stairs one at a time.

“ You won't.”

He smiled, “ No, I won't.”

Your face grew warm when two servants giggled softly, opening the door of his chambers or now—yours too.

It felt natural to be in his arms and to kiss him, like you had known him and this intimacy from ages ago and it baffled you how you had lived so far without starving to death without him.

“ Are you comfortable or is it just because we are married ? ” He asked, face illuminated by the moonish glow.

“ I..does it matter ? ”

“ Yes darling, it does...I want you to be happy, to be safe with me...I want you to know that we want this together.”

“ I want this.” You told him, not blinking as Benji's smile reached his eyes.

“ I love you.” He kissed your nose tip, pulling back expectantly but you only stared back, your heart heavy in your ribs.

You do, you know it, or well you will, it's going to happen and no matter what, it won't change, but deep inside, you didn't know how to form it in words, to say it and not feel sorry, to say it and erase back the years you gaslighted yourself into hating him.

“ I...” You breathed, and he understood, knew you like he was half your soul, his smile was small but he showed no sadness.

“ You don't have to say it back darling.”

And how could you not say it, the way you knew how much your heart would bleed from his love, flowing down your chambers to dripping through your veins, how much you love him, he was summer to your bleaking heart.

“ If I don't say it back, would you still love me ? ”

“ Darling.” He sat down gently in front of you, stroking your cheek as his gaze dropped to your lips, pulling it back to worship your eyes.

“ If you don't say it back then I will say it again, then we'll be even.” and the smile that tugged on both of your faces was worth every great war.

“ You are my first.” you told him shyly, hoping he understood or you were about to die out of shame.

But Benji just about died, his eyes flickered and raked you in, he had bowed, biting his lower lip while nodding.

“ Okay..okay..right.” He smiled, “ Fuck, I will be gentle baby.” His mouth twitched in a grin.

“ you must've had lot's of experiences.” you laughed, it came little bitter but Benji shaked his head, taking your hands and guiding them to his face, he looked cute, face cupped by your hands, your wedding band shinning.

“ I've slept with women but I never made love to them, it's my first time too.”

“oh.”

You lowered your gaze, Benji's touch was like fire, a wild feral flame erupting around you and you craved him, craved to get burnt by him, He softly raised your chin, and his eyes raised in a question.

“ I am not tired...if you're not.” You added quickly, feeling your nerves snap, were you too desperate, would it be bad if you were ?

Because this was your first time and so was his, making love, yes, to make love with your bloody feral husband, to touch him, to feel him, to have him, to keep him.

The way Benji's brow knitted together had you gasping for breath, you would take his refusal if it were that but you waited for so long, that the possibility of tommorow doesn't amuse you, to wait seemed torment.

“ Is that dress too heavy Darling wife ? ” and damn, you could die like that.

~~~

Those treacherous fingers weaved through the back of your dress, knots opening and with each moment he was closer.

You watched his reflection, he would occasionally glance, his blush breezing on his face as he wouldduck down to place a sloppy kiss wherever he liked, but when he looked up with that blazing look in his eyes, you knew it was done, you gave him a tilt of your head, face mere inches apart.

“ I want you....”

And so it goes, his heavy lidded eyes drank you in, his fingers moving your dress down until it fell down in a puddle of pastry around your ankles.

Benji grabbed your waist, he was going senseless in his brain, he couldn't think anything, his brain was short circuiting at all the things he would do to you.

Your back pressed against the soft silks as he climbed over you, his guard discarded somewhere, his chest bare and gleaming.

You breathed but Benji was breathless, mouth agape at your beauty, slowly his hands roamed around your shoulder, kissing every inch and praying to old gods and new because he didn't deserve you, you were all pretty things, bright and shine and him ?

Blood, chaos and thunder.

“ Oh my...oh darling—” His hands trembled, the need to mark you down like a blood stain and the urge to protect you like a dog.

To carve your pretty body and to bruise you blue and claim you all, it was confusing. And romantic. And very much turning him on.

“ Fuck ! ” He growled, your nipples were hard under his thumb and the pleading look you had in your eyes, he wanted to tease you, to make you beg on your knees and get it what you wanted but he was just a man, wild or lunatic, just a man who loved his wife so much, how could he refuse you anything even if it were the moon, he would steal a dragon and fly so high to give you what you wanted, to make true every wish, every dream you had, to fulfil you completely.

All breath was knocked out of you when Benji lowered his mouth, licking the skin of your breast and looking up for approval.

You whimpered at the sensation that practically had you shivering, your knees weakened as his tongue teased your hardened bud, wet and drooling mouth, placing hot kisses.

“ Please, please...Ben—” you tugged at his hair, he was sucking at plump flesh, his other hand rubbing your thigh, heating your whole body up.

“ What ? ” He said, strangled and needy despite trying to be the one to be incharge.

“ Ben... Please—” you heaved, pulling him to you but he pulled away, looking into you eyes and you saw how bloody bastard he could be sometimes when he wanted to be.

“ Darling...” You pouted, and he was just a man, gone before the words even made it out, his fingers teasing your entrance before he placed a kiss on your heart and took your tits in his mouth, humming like a starved man.

Heaven was an utopia concept that Septa talked about, but really, Septa never had made love because this is what it truly felt like, in his arms, in his bed.

Your moans filled the night as his teeth digged in your flesh, Benji was trying his best, the way he tried to stop kneading your breast too fast but ended up fisting it roughly between his palm, softening the pain with the sweet nothings he whispered.

“ How pretty...how soft..mmmm.” He nuzzled closer, you liked him that way, his hands rough, his words soft.

Your hands inevitably reached down between your legs and you just about felt the slickyness before he grabbed your wrist, pulling it back with a devilish grin.

“ Darling, no.” He kissed your finger tips and smiled, poking his tongue out to lick away the white thick juice that calloused your tip.

Whatever he did was enough to untie the knot in your stomach, your pit lurched like sea waves and wanted to crash the shore so badly that you would die begging him.

“Oh darling, how feral you are ? ” He teased, pinning your wrists above your head, his whole body pressing you down, placing a hard kiss on your mouth, squeezing your lips and sucking them dry.

All the while his knee socket digged between your thighs and like you were born to do it, you started moving along as the pressure built up, sparks flying.

“ c'mon, c'mon...do you want a kiss ? ” His jaw slackened as you grew your pace, hips buckling at the intensity and he was kind of very impressed, enough to smile down at your blue and purple bruising bod, releasing your torment.

His fingers only waited a moment before he was knuckles deep, your breath hitched and moans ribbed apart your throat.

“ Benji, oh lord..ah..mm” you hoped he heard the ‘ I love you's ’ you were chanting for him.

“ You're so wet for me...so wet baby.” His mouth dropped to kiss a mole on your tummy, all the while penetrate his finger deeper and then one became two, immediately having your back arch, hips buckling as two turned to three, digging inside you, huffing when he angled them in a way that had you closing your eyes and lose yourself to him.

“So tight for me darling.” You opened your eyes to find his lips on your ear shell, whispering it down to you and his fist inside you, just basking in your warm tight cunt.

“ Benji... darling...” Your face crumbled as tears rolled down, and a greater woman wouldn't beg but you would do anything to have him take you, anything.

You looked just in time as Benji climbed on top of you, his arm on top your head that propped him up so he didn't crush you down.

His fingers glided back from your folds before something thicker than his finger touched your clit.

“Oh.... dear lord.” your chest raised at the heavy intake of air, but He was massive and hard for you, his shaft angry at the unattention.

“Just the tip darling.” He pecked your swollen lips, a droplet of blood sat atop, curtsy by him that he gladly tasted, “sweet.”

You remembered thinking Benji wasn't a liar but in that fucking moment, he was the biggest liar to ever lie, his length pushing down and getting lost in your folds.

You glanced between you and him and shuddered at the thought of being split open by his cock, half his length shining and struggling to wrap inside you.

“ Fuck—” He cursed, “ Your tight pussy I-isn't letting em' in.”

Your thighs ached as he pried them apart for more access, his face red and breaking sweat. He managed to go ball-deep inside you, proud tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“ Benji...” You whimpered, face blotchy with tears that spilled while he kept telling you, it was just the tip and if anything, saying darling wife after every word.

The feeling of freefall, that comes after flying high and higher and not bothering friction and gravitation that pulls, it was just like that, when Ben looked into your eyes before his first thrust inside you, you were flying in the sky with him.

One thrust — and you were falling, your body wasn't your own and it was shearing, it was gleaful, it was infinite.

Your insides clenched as he pushed more, then more and each time his nerves popped harder on his neck, his eyes clenched closer to heaven but he would open them again, using his free hand that wasn't opening your legs to wipe away the tears that streamed down your face, relishing in your soft moaning that screamed his name.

Four thrust down and his restraints broke the chains, he was no longer in control, pounding inside you and all he could do was keep telling you how good you were.

He was bloody, the way he grabbed your arse cheeks to slam his entire length in, spiralling your whole world, bruising you blue.

“ Darling, so good...so good for me.” just when he pulled out only to thrust back in your swollen cunt again, balls deep in your sweet cunt and liar said just the tip.

“ Just like that...mmm..yeah.” just when you thought you were about to split open, with stars in your eyes.

“ Baby love...I love you...I love you.” and his feral took a peak when he leaned to pin your shoulders down, you were fighting for realease but he kept telling you not yet, not now.

“ Benny please...” You cried, but you can take that, you were being so good, such a nice doll to him.

“ I love you...oh my darling, love you so much...let me fill you with my babes..” He moaned out. “ Darling—” he croaked, thrusting harder inside you, the bed shook with his pounding, his face another blissful sight but even through the daze, he wouldn't stop gawking at you, watching you moan on his cock, all your sweet nothings just for him.

“ please... darling, let me see you carry our baby...”

And you had no say before your insides were filled with his juices, warmness spreading inside and out and everything melted in a slow daze and perhaps that's chaos.

The way you came on his cock, silvery misty substance mixing with his own and he dropped his face next to you, sniffing your sweet sweaty hair and placing a soft kiss.

“ That was...” He trailed, shifting his weight next to you and you felt breath rushing in your chest, “....so good baby.”

“ hmmm...” You closed your eyes letting the moment sink, when his arm came and wrapped around your waist then spooning your whole body.

“ My sweet love.” He said, out of nowhere and time passed, your naked bodies tangled in each other, drifting in a peaceful sleep.

~~~

It was one of those dreams, his face dripping with blood, yours or his, you didn't know but the urge to touch him was forevermore.

But then the reality struck you and with more convincing you opened your eyes to moonlight lighting his whole face.

His nose was nuzzled in the crook of your neck and his innocence brighter in the sky full of stars.

His sweet warm mouth drooling over your chest, a bead of his drool cooling your skin.

And the urge was sudden, like lightening when you smiled at your beloved husband.

“ Benji...” you whispered and he didn't move, sleeping and snoring softly.

“ Ben....” you tried again, ofcourse there was tommorow awaiting, but your heart said speak now.

“ huh.” He sleepily hummed, smearing his cheek on your warm body, smiling dopily like it was a very sweet dream.

You smiled, forever remembering the memory when you reached for his hand, entwinng your fingers together.

“ I love you.” You said, “ I love you so much darling.”

And just like that, you survived the great war.

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animehideout · 9 months ago

Text

LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE OF THEM ALL

Part 9

Gojo Satoru x Fem! Reader

Part 10 here ✨🆕

Check out part 8 here if you missed it.

A/n: I'm back with another long chapter, grab a snack and a warm blanket and your headphones 🎧 . This story is ticking closer to its ending, i hope you enjoy this part as well 💖.

Your feedback is highly appreciated ✨🫶🏻.

Music suggestion ♪:

Dove Cameron - Boyfriend & The Weeknd - House Of Balloons.

W.c: 5.2k+ not proofread

Fuming with anger, his chest tightening. You and Nanami hadn’t notice him but he couldn’t take it anymore, he couldn’t bear to linger in your and Nanami’s presence a moment longer or he might not be able to control his shit. Hurriedly, he made his way through the dimly lit hallway to the bathroom, his steps heavy with frustration.

Once inside the bathroom, Gojo leaned over the sink, aggressively splashing cold water on his face attempting to repress the rising tide of his emotions. As the water flown on his face and chest, closing his eyes for the cold sensation to take him, your smile whenever you talked to your students, your laugh whenever Yuuji cracked a joke, the sparkle in your eyes whenever you explained new techniques and moves to your class, the hair strands falling on your face while you slept peacefully. But alongside those beautiful memories lingered the image of you and Nanami a few moments ago, your face inches away from each other as if you were gonna kiss, the way Nanami treated you with gentleness, with love and respect as if he’s your husband and not Gojo. A pang of envy ate him up from the inside. Also remembering how you and Nanami were so casually discussing how he had to kill his only bestfriend, it was too much to handle in only one night.

Clenching his fists, with a sudden burst of emotions, he slammed his hand against the wall, inches away from the mirror. The sharp sting of pain momentarily distracted him from his thoughts.

Alone, looking at his reflection in the mirror, struggling to make sense of the conflicting emotions that swirled within him.

“No it can’t be! I’m not jealous! I hate her…”

Longing, jealousy, deep-seated sense of inadequacy and emptiness. Being the strongest comes with a high cost; being lonely.

With a deep breath, after composing himself in the bathroom, Satoru splashed his face once more with water before turning to leave. As he exited, his mind still racing, he bumped into someone,

“Gojo? What a surprise!”

“Mei Mei?”

She stood before him with a sly, her eyes gleaming with mischief as she scanned his face. Trying her best to catch his attention with the lingerie she was wearing, seductively touching her neck.

“Couldn’t sleep Gojo?”

“Nah, just used the bathroom and now going back to my room”

“Why the rush? Fancy the change of scenery? I’m sure you’re sick of seeing Y/n beside you for the whole night?”

“Nah I’m good-” he replied coldly,

he knew what she’s attempting to do, he’s aware of her feelings towards him but he clearly rejected them a long time ago but she doesn’t seem to get it, especially that it’s his fault to give her a chance to get close to him just to annoy Y/n. And now he regrets it.

But she was persistent, not planning to let go of him. As he walked pass her, she grabbed his arm and spoke,

“Come on Gojo, I thought we’re on the same team! Maybe I can distract you from what’s on your mind right now.. or Y/n is allowed to have fun with Nanami and you’re not ? let’s talk privately in my room, maybe I can help? We’re friends after all, aren’t we?” she smirked.

The thought of Y/n and Nanami together made his blood boil again, completely blinded by anger.

“Okay then, lead the way” he relented,

He knows that probably Nanami and his wife are not like what they seem, but his narcissism told him that he needs to take revenge. If his wife spends time with another man, he’ll spend time with another woman. Even though he’s the one who started this cycle in the first place. He knows its wrong, he can’t even stand Mei Mei, but for his own pride, he had to do it, even though you wouldn’t even see him with her but at least in front of himself. He wasn’t planning to do anything with Mei Mei, he was just there.

“Come in, so do you wanna drink something?”

“I’m good”

“Why do you keep pushing me away, I’m trying to help you know” she said taking off the part of the lingerie that was covering her shoulders. Now completely exposed, only in her laced silky lingerie as she took a seat on her bed.

Gojo sighed, knowing her intentions and the game she was playing. He was feeling extremely uncomfortable.

“You said you wanted to talk.. Go ahead”

“I see you’re rushing! Don’t tell me you already miss sleeping beside your wife, or let me guess! She’s not even there cuz she’s having a date with Nanami?”

“Mei Mei shut up” he said calmly.

“Why? Did it trigger you? Don’t tell me you caught feelings while she’s completely ignoring you for another man… I guess your plan to offend her didn’t work Gojo but rather made her happy to find Nanami”

“I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP” he yelled,

“NO I’M NOT GONNA SHUT UP, I’M NOT GONNA GIVE UP AND LET YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH HER”

“Do you hear yourself? What love are you talking about?”

“I know you have feeling s for Y/n Gojo! But as long as I’m in your life, I wouldn’t allow it to happen..” she paused crawling closer to him as he sat on the bed egde “You deserve someone like me Gojo, why can’t you give me a chance? Divorce with her!! Why would you wait for her curse to break, you know she’s useless either way”

“I won’t divorce her. I won’t give you a chance Mei Mei”

“You sure about that? Look at me, I have everything she doesn’t. You can do whatever you want with me, I offer you my body for tonight and for every night Gojo”

“NO! can’t you see that I don’t want you Mei Mei.. I’m not interested in touching you”

“I was the one who helped you Gojo to offend her and make her life a living hell, is this how you thank me by rejecting me?”

“I paid you for it, you’ve got the money what do you want more?”

“YOU! I LOVE YOU GOJO SATORU” she yelled, her hands reaching his private part to touch it but he slapped them away.

Without saying anything he walked towards the door to leave her room. He walked outside, but she followed him,

“Not so fast, you can’t just leave me like that-” she exclaimed desperately.

She grabbed his face and attempted to kiss him but before he could push her away, a voice spoke behind him,

“Satoru?” you said, your eyes widening.

You caught them in a very wrong time, Mei Mei was basically half naked, only in her laced lingerie that exposed her chest and barely covered her thighs and Gojo shirtless while their faces were close to each other and in front of her room. You couldn’t help but think that both of them half naked, did something very intimate; sex.

“Cheater” you mumbled and started walking away,

“Y/n wait” said Nanami, but you were already gone.

Gojo heart sank at your sight, your expressions a mixture of shock and betrayal. He watched helplessly as you turned away, your footsteps echoing in the silence that followed. It’s true he wanted revenge from the very beginning; he’s the one who asked for Mei Mei’s help. If he got caught in this situation at the beginning of your marriage he would be happiest but now? It made him more frustrated. He wanted to immediately run behind you, but he stopped himself. Why would he if both of you hate each other? You were with Nanami as well, but he knew it wasn’t the same case. Mei Mei told you a lot of false information about her and Gojo being together and hooking up so seeing them both half naked could only mean one thing to you, that he fucked her and cheated on you.

“Fuck” he muttered under his breath.

Mei Mei smirked, seeing you like that made her happy and satisfied. Gojo rounded on her, his eyes narrowing with anger.

“You’re pathetic Mei Mei…. You’re living a false fantasy in your head and I pity you” he spat

“Aren’t you the same with Y/n? Living in your daydream about being with her while she’s out there with your colleague?” she spoke offensively.

His hands clenched into fists, his chest heavy with pent-up emotions. He was completely lost, he couldn’t understand why he felt his way, why it bothered him so much that he got caught. You were going to divorce anyway right? The realization of the consequences of his own actions hit him like a ton of bricks, but he can’t blame Mei Mei, the only one to blame is himself, he knew Mei Mei’s intentions from the beginning but he followed along, driven by his narcissism and ego, and now he’s silently paying for it.

“I don’t love you Mei Mei get that through your head, you took your money, now leave me alone-”

“You’ll regret that Gojo, you’ll regret breaking my heart”

“If there’s something to regret, is regretting involving you in the first place” he said through gritted teeth and then left.

“Don’t follow her Gojo, she clearly doesn’t wanna talk to you and she needs time now” said Nanami as Gojo walked past him.

“This will be my last warning Nanamin, stay away from my wife!” he threatened pointing his index finger at him.

“You dare to call her wife after cheating on her, your arrogance will end you someday Gojo Satoru”

“I. Didn’t. Cheat. On. Her”

“That’s not what it looks like…but you fucked up real bad”

“Mind your business” spat Satoru then left the his room.

….

You hesitated to knock on the door but you did eventually. Ain’t no way you’re spending the night with Gojo, you felt disgusted, and your heart was aching so much. Why would it hurt like this? Why would it affect you so much? You felt your inside organs sinking, as if someone got your heart in their hands and started squeezing it tightly making it bleed. Even though you were with Nanami, but both of you were respectful and didn’t cross the boundaries and most of all, fully dressed. Always eminding yourself that you’re a married woman and even if you don’t respect Gojo you still respect yourself and the others around you.

“Y/n – sensei? Is everything okay?” said Maki as she opened the door.

Summoning your courage, you mustered the strength to voice your request,

“Could..could I spend the night here?” you asked.

“Of course sensei, come in please!”

Despite her sharp personality, Maki was always sweet and understanding towards you. She respects you a lot and over time both of you developed a good friendship even though she’s you’re student. She as well can’t stand Mei Mei and Satoru, so she knows well your struggle.

“Are you alright?” she asked worriedly,

“Mhm” you nodded

“You know if you wanna talk about it, I’m all ears!”

“You’re so sweet Maki! But I’m fine don’t worry I just don’t wanna spend the night with Satoru, you already know, haha the whole school knows that our marriage is fake so it’s kinda hard for both of us to share the room” you said trying to hide the truth that you actually caught your husband half naked with another woman.

“Is it Mei Mei? I know she always causes problems”

“Nah it has nothing to do with her” you reassured “Go back to sleep Maki, you have a long day tomorrow”

Maki moved a bit, giving you some space to lay there.

“Make yourself comfortable” she smiled, giving you an extra blanket.

Anytime you closed your eyes, the sight of both of them creeped up in your mind, your eyes getting wet , you didn’t notice until that one single drop of tear fell on the pillow.

“No it can’t be…I hate him so much” you thought to yourself, trying to ease the heaviness you felt in your heart.

Finally, the sun rose. Announcing a new day. While Maki was asleep at night, you had a full conversation with yourself, giving yourself “the talk”. Convincing yourself that once you divorce him, things will get better and maybe you’ll meet the love of your life when you’re finally free from your curse and from him.

You headed to the common room with Maki to have breakfast, being with her while chatting about random things made your start of the day a lot better, you knew you’d find him there but you weren’t sure how to face him or repress that uncontrollable sting you felt. But your approach was to pretend, pretend as if you didn’t care, as if what happened yesterday was just a bad dream. You took a seat next to Nanami and Megumi and started munching on your food. Completely ignoring Gojo’s sad eyes that were looking your way and Mei Mei’s smirk that was directed to you. You actd as if both of them weren’t there. You enjoyed your breakfast, chitchatting with Nanami, he was as equally confused as Gojo. Didn’t you get pissed yesterday, how did you control your emotions in one night, how strong could you be. But Nanami was happy that you were doing alright, a cheater is definitely not worthy of your tears. Gojo tightened his grip around his cup, excusing himself from the table, barely finishing his food.

You spent your day teaching as usual, but having extra fun and laughing extra hard. To others it seemed real but inside it was nothing but a pretend. Laughing to not give a chance to your sorrow to take over you. Laughing and being a social butterfly, joking around with your students just to hide how empty you were feeling from the inside. The void inside of you got more bigger, and it requires more efforts to conceal it. You’ve got this, you’ve been dealing with emptiness and disappointment since a very young age, but as you got older you learned how to hide it but let it break you when you’re completely alone.

You watched as your students were gathered in the school field, chatting and having fun, a smile tugged on the corners of your mouth, having friends and enjoying your teenage years is something you never experienced but it made you happy to see others enjoy it; cousins and siblings, sharing inside jokes and discussing events that happened at school , gossiping about teachers while you sat in a corner, forced by your parents to sit with them, just so you don’t lose your social skills of being at home for your whole life. Funny how they were scared that you might lose your social skills while you already lost yourself.

And now it’s repeating itself, you’re watching your students laugh together and enjoy their time. But it’s never too late to have. You walked towards them, yes, you’ll join them and act as if you were a student, for once you wanted to experience that.

“Hey guys, watcha doing?” you said with a smile.

“Oh Sensei! We were just having fun” exclaimed Yuuji excitedly,

“Oh , mind if I join?” you asked

“You’re always welcome in the friend group sensei” said Nobara

You sat with them, joining in the fun, carrying the conversation with them. Maybe you had nothing positive out of this new life, out of this marriage but at least now you have friends; Nanami, Maki, Yujii and the other students. Funny how these young students are way mature and respectful than Gojo and Mei Mei. Proof that power isn’t everything if you can’t be a decent human being.

As you were laughing at one of Panda’s jokes, you were taken aback from a deep voice that filled the space and got you al mute instantly.

“You brats are so loud, wonder how Y/N is bearing you”

You kept looking for the voice, when Yuji slapped his face.

“Eeh apologies sensei, he likes to intervene in the most unexpected times”

“Huh?” you looked at Yuuji and you saw a mouth popping up on his cheek.

“What is that?” you asked again

“That? Tch I’m Ryomen Sukuna the king of curses”

It was the first time you see him, or only his mouth. You knew Yuuji was the vessel but you didn’t know that he could show up like that. Suddenly, tattoos started appearing on Yuuji’s face.

“Oh this can’t be any good” muttered Megumi.

You looked in disbelief, the jujutsu world is full of surprises. Scary but interesting.

“Now kids excuse us, I need to talk with Y/N alone” said Sukuna making you furrow your brows.

All of them stood their ground, ready to exorcise him if he ever touched you. You heart warmed at how they were considerate and protective over you but it made you feel weak. A teacher is the one supposed to protect the studenst and not opposite.

“I won’t let you hurt Y/n-sensei” said Megumi

“That’s okay guys! I’ll be fine” you smiled towards them “Go back to your classes, I’ll join you later”

Well you weren’t sure if you’ll join them later or not, given that Ryomen Sukuna is standing in front of you and he could snap you in half before even trying to take your last breath. But you wanted to face a real danger, you’ve never seen a curse and you had the honor to see the king of curses.

Sukuna looked at you with his red eyes and a playful smirk drawn on his face.

“So you’re the rumored to surpass me?” he started

“E-excuse me?” you said in confusion, how would you surpass the king of curses.

“Oh yeah I remember, they’re hiding a lot of things from you, a lot of information from you….but I’m not one to spoil the fun but rather run with the flow if I like it of course…so imma just say, I can’t wait for you curse to break.”

“What are you talking about? What info? And why would you wait for my curse to break?”

“To finally have the legendary duel that everyone is waiting for, including your husband”

You froze in place, as fear crept into your bones like a chill.

“There must be a mistake, what duel? I’m not even a sorcerer”

“You will be! You don’t know your potential yet, surprised that that brat Gojo Satoru hasn’t told you, he likes to spoil everything”

“So is this an indirect way to say that you can’t wait to kill me?”

“Something like that yeah”

“oh wow wonderful” you chuckled nervously, as your hands started sweating.

What a way to finish your day, by getting threatened by the king of curses himself.

As you were talking, Mei Mei interrupted you. You rolled your eyes, being threatened by Sukuna is way better than seeing her face. But you had to act cool.

“Oh look who’s here” she begun “The famous Ryomen Sukuna”

“Isn’t she scared that he might kill her?” you thought to yourself.

“I’m having a private conversation so get out of here” he spat ruthlessly

“Oh don’t worry, I have no intention in fighting you Sukuna just wanted to check up on my friend”

“Talking as if you stand a chance against me in a fight, so don’t make me say it again, piss off NOW”

“Alright, but I see that Y/n is having fun, surrounding yourself by men! Married to Gojo, hooking up with Nanami and now hitting on Ryomen Sukuna… not only a gold and power digger but also a curse digger…. Now I see why Gojo chose me- because you’re a slut”

You couldn’t take it anymore, so you slapped her as hard as you could, you hand connected with her cheek in a sharp crack. The force of the slap sent a shockwave through Mei Mei’s body, her head snapping to the side with the impact. For a moment, time seemed to stand still as she registered the sting of pain radiating from her cheek, a burning sensation that pulsed with each rapid heartbeat. As she found your eyes, she was met with a fury gaze that burned holes through her. She’s been provoking you and pushing you to the brink for days now, and you finally snapped.

Sukuna watched with amusement, you didn’t disappoint even though you’ve got 0 cursed energy. He knew you were different from the day you succeeded in landing a punch on the famous Gojo Satoru, he’s formidable enemy. But know he’s no longer interested in Gojo, his new target is you.

Mei Mei took a step closer to you but Sukuna stood in front of you,

“You dare to lay a finger on her and I’ll chop you into pieces” he threatened, his red eyes glowing .

“I know you won’t, you have a pact with Yuji and you can’t break it”

“Who said I can’t? know your place fool, I’m the king of curses”

“Ahh” she laughed in disbelief.

“Are you thick in the head or what? I SAID PISS OFF BITCH”

Mei Mei left both of you alone, walking away like a loser she is. You looked at Sukuna, he was threatening you a few minutes ago and now defending you?

“Why’d you do that? Defend me? I thought you wanted to kill me?”

“Because you’re reserved for me, no one can harm my future opponent, gotta keep you safe fpr now so I can enjoy fighting you later” he smirked.

You glared at him,

“So I’m supposed to thank you?”

“Nah you’re supposed to find out why your curse didn’t break yet, aren’t you curious?”

You were indeed curious but you had nothing you could do except waiting, you married Satoru and that’s the ultimate thing you could do. After making your vows that bond was automatically created, you knew breaking the curse takes time, but it took longer than you expected, but what can you do except waiting? So you avoided it and just let this invisible bond do its thing. Now after meeting Sukuna you were questioning if you truly wanted to become a sorcerer, since you’ll probably get killed by him.

“I’m not” you simply said and left.

“We’ll meet again Y/n, so better count your days” he teased, his devilish laughed echoeing in your ears.

…..

“Sensei are you alright?” asked Maki

“Yeah I’m fine, just had a small talk with Sukuna” you reassured them

“SENSEI” yelled Yuuji as he ran towards you.

“Yuuji-kun?”

“I’m sorry Sensei I couldn’t stop him from swapping…I’m sorry if he scared you” explained Yuuji with an apologetic expression, as he engulfed you in a hug.

“Aw, you’re the sweetest Yuuji! But no need to worry about me, I’m really fine” you smiledwidely, patting his head.

“I’m glad you’re okay!”

“Now go on to your dorms, it’s getting late”

….

You closed your room’s door, taking a heavy breath as you started changing into your pyjamas,

“And I thought my life wouldn’t get any worse”

Settling on your bed, you didn’t want to spend the night with Satoru but you had no option. You can’t spend the rest of your life in Maki’s room. As you were trying to calm yourself down from the storm that raged inside you, your stomach twisting, expecting Gojo to show up at any given moment, you grabbed your book, flipping the pages. You couldn’t concentrate or keep your focus on anything, your thoughts scrambled, too many threats, too many problems and it was already a success that you didn’t lose your shit yet. Trying your best to stay composed and to not go completely crazy on anyone who tries to talk to you.

As your eyes focused on the page in front you, words not making any sense, the door creaked open, shattering your desperate attempt of having a peaceful night. Your heart leaped into your throat, you knew he’ll join you eventually, but forseeing it didn’t make you any prepared. A wave of panic washed over you, feeling as if you were going to puke from how anxious you were. You averted your gaze back to your book, avoiding him even though you felt his eyes boring into you. You didn’t know the reason behind his intense looks and you weren’t ready to find out as well. Your jaw clenched tight as you tried to keep your emotions in check, your silence already spoke volumes.

He grabbed a t-shirt and one of his sweatpants from his wardrobe and started changing, you weren’t phased by him changing in front of you, you were actually ignoring his existence. He knew you were done with him when you didn’t yell at him for changing in front of you, for not even being bothered by his appearance. You were boiling inside, but you kept a poker face. And it broke him into pieces, it have made him loads better if you screamed and yelled at him, if you voiced your anger like you usually do, but your silence scared him for the very first time and he thought it was the end.

He joined you in bed. By his body language you could tell he was preparing to say something. He cleared his throat, hesitant to say anything, but he had to keep that cool and confident image.

“Hey about last night, just so you know I didn’t cheat on you- it’s not like what it seemed, we di-”

“I don’t wanna hear anything, I don’t wanna even hear your voice Satoru” you said coldly

“I’m not dying to express myself but I don’t like it when someone msiun-”

“THEN SHUT UP” you snapped out of frustration

“W-what?”

“Idon’t wanna hear any more lies Satoru, you can fuck her as much as you want you, it’s not phasing me at all”

“Then why did it bother you like that to the point that ran away-”

“Because I’m disgusted of you” you said through gritted teeth throwing away your book on the floor

He didn’t say anything, but looked at you with wide eyes as you threw a tantrum.

“Why’d you insist that I’m a cheater huh? Because I’m not! She pushed herself on me! It was just a wrong timing”

“I.Don’t.Care!” you said as you left the bed

“Yeah clearly, you don’t care about anyone except yourself” now he started attacking you,

“WHAT?”

He took a step closer to you, his hand grabbing your wrist forcefully, pulling you towards him,

“I said you only care about yourself! You see what you want to see, you understand what you want to understand, you don’t even try to connect with people on a deeper level because you’re empty and you hate it, because you know once they get to know you they’ll find nothing from the inside”

He did strike a sensitive nerve, and hit a sensitive spot in you, using your trauma against you is a terrible thing to do, such a cowardice. It’s like voicing his own trauma but using it to insult you.

“You don’t have any right to say this, you don’t even know me!”

“And you don’t have any right to call me a cheater, you don’t even know me!”

“All I know is that you’re broken, alone and desperate…hiding behind power but the night exposes you, you nightmares humble you-”

“If you say any other word, you’ll regret it Y/N”

“Yeah threaten me all you like, I’m going to die anyway” you said the last sentence as a whisper but he heard it.

It pissed him off, how you caught all vulnerable, he hated to admit how his nightmares scared him, how they haunted him for years but you simply used them against him. He took a step closer to you,

“I pity you Y/n, you dare to speak nonsense because your entire life is nonsense itself.. Yeah that must be hard for you, being ignored by your parents and family, of course you’d grow up to become a disappointment, a failure. You failed your family and now you’re failing everyone around you in Jujutsu high..” he spoke,

His words like daggers that were thrown directly at your chest, you wanted to fight him back but deep down you knew every word he said was true. Your family didn’t even call to check up on you since the day you got married, as if you were a burden and finally got rid of it. They didn’t even believe that your curse would break, they had a bit of hope that Gojo would do something but definitely not you.

You stared at him, with a smile that hid your sadness , you grabbed your jacket, and left. Closing the door behind you. He didn’t mean any word he said, he was just driven by jealousy, and you saying that him and Mei Mei didn’t bother you drove him crazy, making him think that you don’t have any feelings towards him and that you want Nanami instead.

*Timeskip to the morning*

As the morning light filtered through the big window, casting a warm glow over the breakfast table, Gojo took his seat, ignoring Mei Mei who was trying hard to get his attention. As the minutes ticked by, your absence became increasingly conspicuous, concerned whispers filled the room.

“Where’s your wife?” asked principal Yaga

Satoru’s brow furrowed in confusion,

“I thought she was here…maybe she’s in the bathroom or something” he replied, shoving food inside his mouth.

“I was in the bathroom, and she wasn’t there” said Maki

A sense of panic rippled through the group, Nanami quickly stood up from his chair and started searching in the whole school, but you were nowhere to be found. Followed by your students, principal Yaga and now Gojo whose heart started pounding as he looked for you everywhere. Only Mei Mei calmly sitting still, enjoying her food.

Once again gathered in the common room, after their failed attempt to find you, they called you multiple times but failed to reach you.

“Did something happened between you two?” asked Principal Yaga, his voice cutting through the chaos.

Satoru swallowed hard, the weight of his guilt settling heavily upon his shoulders,

“We-we had an argument last night….” He admitted “she left the room and I thought she was just going to the balcony or something…I didn’t realize she had left”

“SHE WAS YOUR FUCKING RESPONSIBILTY SATORU!!” yelled Yaga sensei

“Sensei I truly didn’t know!”

“You know that there’s a murderer on the loose that’s targeting her and you didn’t care ..”

“Wait what?” asked the students in union since they didn’t know about Toji’s plan to murder you.

“Instead of protecting her what the fuck where you doing?” asker principal Yaga once again

“He was with me!” said Mei Mei taking the last bite of her toast “Gojo was with me” she repeated

“If you dare to throw any other lie Mei Mei I swear to God I’ll kill you” threatened Gojo walking towards her but Nanami stopped him.

“Don’t blame others for your own mistakes Gojo “ she said offensively

As they were fighting, trying to have a plan on how to find you, Gojo received a text on his phone, that got his eyes widen in fear,

[Gojo Satoru, I wanted to inform you that your wife is with me, I don’t think you care that much , but so you can save yourself and energy from the hassle of searching that the higher ups would put you through – Toji Fushiguro]

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jymwahuwu · 1 year ago

Note

I've been thinking about mara struck Jing Yuan...he'll be more aggressive and protective. Honestly, you can see his mara struck from miles away ever since he started being more clingy and possessive than usual. But when the mara finally strikes, it's like all hell breaks loose and Jing Yuan just straight up kidnaps you from Luofu. Yes they might have facilities to help people who are getting mara struck, but if it means he needs to be separated from his wife then he rather runs away while bringing you along with him.

He won't hesitate anymore to fuck you anytime he wants. He's no longer the patient, sweet and vanilla man he used to be. He's now a desperate man who only wants the attention of his wifey, and he also won't hesitate to breed you until you are full of his baby seeds <3. Jing Yuan would also dirty talk you more often, saying nasty things about how much he wants to touch and see your whole body everyday, how much he loves seeing his cum leaking from your pussy everyday.

The type of man who will drink all of his wife's breast milk, no matter how much you begged him to stop since it's supposed for your baby.

But on the other hand, imagine Jing Yuan already maa struck, but sane enough to not let anyone notice and still be a general. Yet when it's just the two of you, he'll become a mean bastard who gropes you everywhere. The amount of times the two of you having sex outside is getting out of hand, him saying the warmth of your pussy is the only thing that can help him calm his mara and even saying he wants to fucks his babies into you right in the middle of the day.

How could you put this into my head? 😩💞I have always been worried about Jing Yuan getting mara in the future. Blade said that everyone has a different way of experiencing mara. Let’s explore the two ways you mentioned🤔

CW: yandere, non-con, kidnapping, angst, forced pregnancy, lactation

It is indeed possible that Jing Yuan can maintain his sanity and continue to do his job as a general. He needs something to hold his mara down, and that's you <3! Before this the General was just waiting for you to visit him at work and bring some comfort food, but now you have to stay by his side all the time. He undresses you and gropes you, rubbing his cock against your folds. You're often sitting uncomfortably in wet panties that you can't change.

As for another possibility, Jing Yuan has always been responsible for Xianzhou. He maintains an upbeat and relaxed demeanor, but that's just a disguise - those friends and enemies are now gone from his side. Occasionally, Jing Yuan misses those good times. Under normal circumstances, they can be suppressed, but these emotions and memories are strengthened in mara's state. Those images frequently appeared in his mind...

gathering with old friends, laughing and playing, companions lost on the battlefield, young self, him who never thought of being a general…

And you - the scene of leaving him repeatedly appeared in his dreams, and in blurred illusions. Different stories, but the same thing is that you show a vague - disappearing look, smile, wave to him, then turn around and slowly walk away. Sometimes, you even have new friend and lover around you. He stretched out his hand, but it was like fishing for the moon in the water, unable to touch your figure.

The general woke up with a start, touched his side, and hugged you into his arms. Those golden eyes like lions did not close all night.

After the curse of longevity really happened, the Ten-Lords Commission arranged for people to take him away, but when they arrived, the general had already taken you away from Luofu. He retained his remaining sanity and left instructions to Fuxuan and Yanqing, passing on the responsibility of managing Luofu to them.

So of course!! He acts possessive in this situation!

Jing Yuan bought a new property on a planet, not as big a mansion as the General's Mansion, but luxurious enough for living. He needs to be alone with you and live a peaceful life, and some strange voices in his ears keep urging him to possess and penetrate you. Be prepared to be pushed onto the bed, on the table, or even caressed in the bathtub. You watched in panic as he took your phone away. "Wait …!! it's not what you think…" Jing Yuan usually lifts you up with his strong arms, pulls your legs apart and thrusts, allowing you to fully receive the seeds .

No. He doesn’t believe you’re out just to buy ingredients <3 Why is your message asking friends for advice?

Jing Yuan is still good at sweet talk. He noticed your twitch under his compliment. He never fails to praise and adore your body and cuteness. Watching you squirt on the bed, you stick out your tongue unconsciously. There is no doubt about your pregnancy.

The day your buds leaked milk, Jing Yuan had been lying on your body, sucking and teasing your areola, which tasted sweet, creamy, and warm. You sobbed, pushing his white hair with your hands and explaining that it was for the baby. The tip of his tongue licks away the drop of white milk from your areola, responds with some vague sounds, and uses his thumb to rub and circle to stimulate.

He knows what he's doing.

He had never been so awake.

If the long life has been about losing, then he has something precious to keep as well.

So that his humanity will not be destroyed.

#yandere hsr #yandere honkai star rail #yandere jing yuan #yandere hsr x reader #yandere jing yuan x reader #honkai x reader #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you

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railingsofsorrow · 1 year ago

Text

Countdown

[s.reid x reader]

summary: Blood and wine were indistinguishable. You couldn't move, you couldn't breathe, the world was giving up on you (or was it the other way around?). You had to keep fighting. If there's one thing you are sure of is that they would find you. He would find you. You just didn't know how much longer you could take until then.

pairing: s.reid x f!reader

w.c: 6.7K

warnings/content: mentions of freud regarding complex mother/son relationships; tw!aggravated assault; tw!coercion caused by substance use; tw!mentions of child abuse, physical and emotional abuse; very tw!graphic violence be aware; tw!blood; tw!descriptions of injuries and scars; cursing; tw!suicide ideation; mentions of hallucinations, tw!abduction and tw!death of a relative; heavy descriptions of losing sense of time; crying; cm usual stuff; poor analysis of a profile cause I'm no aaron hotchner; in resume there's angst; mc cannot get a break. (tell me if I forgot anything plz)

A/N: oof that's a lot of trigger warnings. if you don't feel comfortable, feel free to leave, this isn't a light fic, quite the opposite. mc goes through a LOT. btw do you like wine? I do. (no pun intended) enjoy the reading!

navi

masterpost

follower celebration

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“Suffering is a terrible fire;

it either purifies

or destroys.”

[Oscar Wilde]

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

According to Sigmund Freud, there’s a theory called “the Oedipus complex”. It happens when the child develops a sexual attraction to the opposite-sex parent, meaning that they wish to replace his father to possess his mother, from whom he craves affection.

Spencer’s voice rang through your head as you observed your surroundings. Your hands weren’t tied anymore but the red marks around your wrists made you feel as if the ropes were still there.

There are five stages in this condition, the fifth being the hardest to overcome, but not impossible. However, when the Oedipus complex is not resolved it could lead to an unhealthy attachment towards the opposite-sex parent in adulthood, besides the commitment issues and trouble involving same-sex rivalry.

You also recalled the Doctor detailing statistics about the topic, wildly gesticulating with his hands. But your head was fuzzy and you didn’t know whether your memories were true or if you were making them up anymore. Just as a means to bring you some type of comfort in that endless torture.

He was drugging you.

Paul Knox, the UnSub, was a white male in his mid-forties. Lived alone for most of his life, except for when he married Martha Moore; they stayed together for one year before the marriage ended. Paul worked on a construction site and was described by his coworkers as quiet, “always kept to himself”, and responsible. He always made sure his task of the day was completed before he went home.

His past wasn’t the easiest one. And it seemed as if he couldn’t get away from it. Paul spent his entire childhood being abused by both of his parents, his father, a strict man, sexually abused his wife, who would later take out her anger on her son, by wrapping a belt around his neck and squeezing it until he passed out — This was the signature behavior they found on the crime scenes.

Victimology told you and the team something as clear as day: every woman he murdered was a surrogate to his mother.

And you concluded you had pissed him off enough for him to abduct you and keep you the same way he was keeping his victims.

When you woke up, the only thing you could see was blood.

Blood whenever you stepped.

On your hands.

On your arms.

On your lips.

You could even taste the metallic liquid. And that made you terrified. Not more terrified – of course – than being locked up in a place for god-knows-how-long without a sense of reality. There was a physical fight hours before—or was it days? You couldn't know, time was different where you were. You had a slight chance of speculating if it was day or night due to the minimum crack on one of the walls. Your pinky would fit if anything.

You succeeded in breaking a plate of food he had brought at the back of his head; which barely confused the man as you attempted to sprint towards the door. Well, You did try. Right as you reached the gate, he yanked your hair back and knocked you out on a solid surface.

When you woke up, the first thought that crossed your mind was I'm dead.

You weren’t.

Thankfully, you had just passed out. Again.

Letting out a painful breath, you forced your eyes to stay open. You had to keep trying, you weren’t about to let him win that easily. Before your team found you — if they hadn’t already — you had to buy yourself some time. Once his obsession exceeds its peak, you wouldn't stand a chance.

The sound of another shard of glass clicking against the floor disturbed that deafening silence. Although, no more than actually taking a piece of glass out of your flesh.

You moaned in pain when it was finally out. Maybe being shot would hurt less because I'd blackout. But this hurts like a bitch.

Your breathing was unsteady and you were hyperventilating. There were at least five breathing exercises running through your head as you surveyed the room, looking for a way out. You had been placed in another corner. It was still the same room, but you were seeing it from another angle. This time you could walk; barely, but still. You refused to look at your feet with the trail of blood it left as you walked.

Focus. You need to find a way out.

You're a profiler. Profile him.

Forty-five.

White male.

Abandonment issues caused by his mother leaving him at the age of nine years old.

Each victim was a surrogate to his mother; he kept them for two days and then wrapped a belt around their throats to slash it postmortem. That's his M.O.

You had none of the victim characteristics. You were only unfortunate to be in the right place at the wrong time.

Emily and you were sent to investigate the supposed location the UnSub took his victims to; an old apartment downtown. However, he was onto you as soon as you entered the place. In a moment of distraction, you had been swiped with a chloroform wipe before Emily could blink.

What a cliché way to abduct someone.

On the first day, he covered your mouth with a dirty blanket but kept your hands and feet tied up tightly around a chair. You complied with everything he said, claiming you understood him and that he was so much better than his mother. Wrong move. At the mere mention of her, the guy completely lost it.

You could still feel the slap that made your head turn. No doubt his fingers were marked on your cheek.

Then, radio silence. Your brain worked wildly as you started to analyze your surroundings with undivided attention. There were two dark shelves a few meters away from you and a few boxes scattered around. The room was extremely dark, no windows, and carried a bitter smell. The floor was a blur to you, you didn't know were you were stepping.

Countless bottles on the shelves. It almost reminded you of—

Wait.

There was barely any light in the room, only through that tiny hole in the wall. You assumed it was around evening because of where the angle the shadow was reflecting upon.

1978. Read on the bottle.

This is a wine bottle.

I'm in a wine cellar.

Your happiness was short-lived as your vision blurred, causing you to stumble back slightly.

The bottle slipped from your fingers.

Your mind goes into wildfire when your feet stepped onto something sharp and, immediately, the familiar sensation of it deepening into your skin. You never realized your body was falling, the only thing you could actually grasp onto was the pain, the agony you felt. Your screams echoed through the walls, then your tears joined as a company.

Blood and wine were indistinguishable.

Your vision begins to gloss over, dark spots covering your eyes from reality. It would be only a matter of time until you drifted off again. Was it sad to say that the sensation was becoming familiar? It shouldn't be. You should be fighting for survival.

But your legs had pieces of glass sticking out and your left hand throbbed from an open wound from another piece you had pulled out.

You heaved a shaky exhale, grunting as you tried to step back from the broken bottle. Daring to take a look at your legs was the last you did before the door creaked open, a bitter smile spreading on your dry lips.

“Shit.”

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

The BAU’s technical analyst typed fast on her computer, her eyes quickly swapping between each screen. She was checking into possible locations Paul Knox could've taken his victims, excluding where the last body was found. His M.O. changed drastically from one night to the other, which meant he was escalating. And angry, extremely angry — Garcia couldn’t imagine something else after hearing the news you had been taken.

“As if this couldn’t get any more creepy…” The blonde mumbled under her breath, eyes scanning over her newfound footage. It was a big house, colonial style colored with a pastel yellow on its walls. The picture showed the Knox’s posing for the camera; mother, son, and husband. Left to right. Something irked her in that image and that’s why she hadn’t dwelled on it when they were looking for the prime suspects’ background. His first home wasn’t relevant, he didn't take his victims there.

They had been so wrong.

Her server picked up on a distinct signal. One that shouldn't be there in such an old building.

“He films it. Everything.” Emily handled five of the eighteen tapes they found in the UnSub’s apartment. Derek shook his head as he saw many names written on each of them.

“There’re eighteen here.” You frowned, counting for the third time. “It’s supposed to be seventeen. We found seventeen bodies.”

“We haven’t found the last one yet.”

And this is how you disappeared from their radar. The eighteenth woman was not found and you were abducted from right under their noses the night after you figured he kept souvenirs from his victims. Necklaces, earrings and those awful recordings.

When Penelope succeeded in hacking into the system, a camera was functioning properly. Just one. The place was dark, but the camera provided a poor lightening and from that, her breath caught in her throat.

“Oh, my god.” The technical analyst covered her mouth in astonishment. There you were, on her computer screen. There was no doubt. She's worked with you in the same environment for nearly five years. You were friends, coworkers, partners in crime. She knew you. And that was breaking her heart.

You were thrown over the floor against a shelf, your head lolling to the side as if you were too weak to lift it. “No, no, no,” Garcia exclaimed, tears trailing down her cheeks and ruining her make-up. The floor was damp with something and she can't even imagine what it was.

“Garcia?” Hotch's voice spoke through their connected microphone. “What is it?”

She had completely forgotten she was in a connected call.

The team was in the round table room, trying to figure out your whereabouts with the help of the clues they had until now. Which were minimal. They were very behind in the UnSub's game.

Garcia's gasp made everyone quit their work, to simply stare at the machine anxiously and wait for the woman's next words.

“We have to find her. Now!” Nothing else can stand out through the line like Penelope's frantic fingers typing fast.

Derek is the first to ask for clarification, “Baby girl, give us something. What happened?”

By now, everyone was on the edge of their seats with the tension.

The line pauses, and before anyone could complain, Penelope interjects in a weak voice, “Come to my cave. You need to see this.”

Once they arrive in Penelope's office, the sight is more than they expected. Way more.

The door opened and a figure walked into the dark room. They all watched with bated breath as Paul Knox crouched down to your weak body, drawing a hand to run through your cheek.

“That son of a—”

“What is that?” Spencer cut Derek off, eyes glued to the man's pocket, something was sticking out of it. His mind works faster than any other, the likelihood of the team having a breakthrough during a case because of his inputs is huge and he's quite proud of that — even though Spencer doesn't give himself much credit.

He feels the dumbest in the room right now.

Not only did he lose you the night you were taken but he couldn't find you. The geographical profile was redone five times by him, he analyzed every detail over and over again, his brain was on fire. But he failed. He failed. How could he do that when you needed him the most? Where was his knowledge and IQ of 187 when he needed it?

Penelope turned off the screen on an impulse, earning discontent reactions from everyone else. She didn't answer them as lots of things started popping up on the other computer screen.

“Garcia.” Spencer presses, jaw clenched. He was really trying to not yell at the technical analyst to find a location fucking faster or else instead of a living agent they would find a body to bury.

No. No, that wouldn't happen. That couldn't happen.

“I'm trying!”

“Try harder!” He yelled, causing every eye to give him impressed looks. Spencer Reid doesn’t scream, he doesn’t raise his voice, he doesn’t lose his cool. But he had never seen you in a pool of your own blood in an unknown place as a hostage before. He had never been so powerless. “He's gonna do something!” He reasoned his outburst with the team. How weren't they desperately losing their minds? Was this what they were like when he had been kidnapped by Tobias Hankel? Extremely collected and calm, just like in any other case? “Are we just going to sit here and watch? This is Y/N!”

The sound of the footage suddenly burst through the cave, causing everyone to freeze up.

“Stop. No, n— what is that? Get the fuck away from me— No!”

“Oh, my god,” Emily mumbles with a hand over her mouth. They weren’t able to see the footage, but hearing your screams was just as painful.

“Reid,” Hotch warned, knowing how hard this was being on him. He shouldn't stay there, it would only make things worse, as much as it pained Aaron what was happening — he was your friend before he was your boss — the situation required him to be the levelheaded one. He couldn't jeopardize your safety because of emotions. “Go take a walk.”

“No.” was Spencer's reply. Before he could snap at anyone else and make the tension in the room increase, a hand squeezed his shoulder.

“C'mon, kid.” Derek tugged his forearm.

“I'm not going anywhere—”

“Yes, yes, you are.” Derek sends him a pointed look, pushing him out of the room “C'mon, let's take a walk. Being like this isn't gonna help us find her.”

“Look,” JJ points to the moving image, Penelope had turned it back on due to Hotch’s request. They were too close to figure out your location and they needed to grasp every detail of wherever that room was. “It’s that a… needle?” That can’t be happening. Not again. JJ flinched back as the syringe was pressed against your neck and your cries started to quieten up. She had seen that film before, it was just a continuous nightmare by now. Spencer’s limp body flashed through her mind, a terrible flashback. Now, you. It wasn’t fair. Hotch took her out of her inner turmoil to say they had found her location. Emily was already out of the room.

“Find our girl. Please, find her.” Penelope gave her a pleading look, her glasses were smeared with tears.

Jenifer didn’t need to be told twice.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

Next time you woke up you saw metal bars. There was a steady dripping sound resonating around. You didn't know where it came from, your senses were compromised by your dizziness; sometimes it was distant, sometimes it was right by your side.

Plink. Plink. Plink.

Always three times then a pause.

Paul had put you in a cage. That much was clear, the quadrangle shape along with the metal bars. You could barely stretch out your legs all the way due to the limited space.

Something stirred in your sight and you realized you weren't alone in the room. He's still here.

Where are your instincts? Where are the tactics you use to save someone almost every day? And why aren't you making use of them right now?

The dripping stopped.

Something creaked and your face was being touched. Feeling the familiar reaction of a panic attack approaching, you tried to regulate your breath. This was not the time. You thought. But again, have you had control over anything over these past few days?

“Don't cry. I won't hurt you.”

When you got out of the high of whatever substance he had injected into your system, you winced at the numbness in your left foot. You moved your limbs around, attempting to sit down. He had cleaned you up. You were in different clothes, too. And the blood was gone.

He touched me.

Hetouchedmehetouchedmehetouchedmehetouchedm—

Stay focused.

“13…11…9…7.” You started counting in the odd-numbered pattern you learnt calms you down. “5…3…1…13— What is—” a red light in a corner of the room glinted at you. “Are you recording me?” You exhaled harshly, squinting your eyes. No, that wasn't the dizziness. The red light was probably there the whole time, but it remained unnoticeable. A wave of drowsiness almost knocks you out again but instead, you squeeze your nails against your tight to prevent sleeping — pain was better than the unknown. You didn't know what he did when you were out of it, though you had an idea just a minute ago. “You enjoy your souvenirs, don't you? Sick bastard!”

You're losing your temper, control yourself.

I can't.

I need to get out of here. I need to GET OUT.

“Let me out.” You whispered to nothing.

What takes you to a breaking point? Being held captive by a sociopath maniac or not knowing what to do to escape it?

All of your qualifications went down the drain. Suddenly you didn't have a PhD in Biopsychology.

Survival mode originally evolved to help us handle threats and situations that activate our stress-response systems. When the alternative does not involve escape or fighting, we are wired to freeze, a state of hyperarousal.

It's always better to go ahead with the instructions, otherwise, you might touch a rough spot and their only response will be to eliminate their target.

Your friends’ voices rang through your brain as if they were supposed to help you somehow.

The walls were closing in, rationality was out of the picture.

“Let me out of here, please!”

“Stop screaming. No one will hear.”

You turned towards the door, jaw clenching. You weren't just weak, you were angry. That shouldn't be happening to you, you were just at the wrong place at the wrong time and he took advantage of that.

“They will catch you.” You spat out. “You don't have a chance once they find you, Paul.”

He nodded, crouching down in front of the cage, hands gripping the sidebars. “I'm aware of that.”

That made you freeze.

So it was an all-or-nothing situation? If your probability of getting out of that alive was slim, now it was just ridiculous.

“You need to learn a lesson.” He said, unlocking the cage and crawling in. As much as you tucked yourself in the corner, he was still able to touch you, he was still able to be desperately close. “Beautiful, beautiful, Daisy... Why'd you hurt me like that?”

Daisy.

Daisy…

“Daisy... I did everything you asked me too. Why'd you leave me with him? The bad man? Why?”

The bad man.

Daisy and Caleb Knox, those were Paul’s parents.

At the age of nine Daisy left Paul to Caleb's care and ran away. She was never found.

It's always better to go ahead with the instructions. Play into his fantasy.

“I'm— I'm sorry,” you croaked out, testing the waters.

“Are you really?”

“He made...” Taking a deep breath You felt your tongue heavy and your head spin. You would pass out any minute. How much longer would you handle without food? You can't remember the last time you ate. “... he made me— do that. I wanted to protect you. I did. But he didn't— he didn't let me,” your breath was shallow and you felt yourself floating.

Stay awake.

“Liar.” He mumbled after a while. “Liar!” You didn't expect the slap when it came. The force made you stumble back, pressing your eyes and groaning in pain. “How can you keep lying to me after all these years? You slut! I was alone! With him!”

“I understand,” you replied, shakily, licking your lips as the copper taste filled your tastebuds. “But— but you love me. Don't you?” Opening your eyes, you realized he was a little farther than you expected. His eyes stared right into your soul with a kind of regret and disgust you had never seen. “You were always a good kid, Paul... Would never hurt your mom. Because you're good. Aren't you?”

A lot of things were at stake there. your life, mostly. If you as much as stepped into his anger then you would be done for.

In a blink of an eye he was in front of you again, “I am. I-I I am, mom.” Mom. That's good. He's falling for it. You could save your vomit for later.

Then, you saw the belt. The same one he uses on the victims for the final kill.

Death wasn't a thing to be afraid of. It's simply another part of life. Or, for the believers, eternal life.

You have never been scared of death in your twenty-five years of living. Not when the situation was related to you, at least. Which was completely different if someone on your team got injured badly, let alone your boyfriend. You didn't know what it was that whenever you were in danger's ways, no fear would kick in, only the nice feeling of adrenaline running through your veins.

However, this wasn't like most cases. You knew this one would break you to the core. You would never be the same after that. If you even get the chance to say after this case. Spencer had this experience. He had been abducted and tortured by Tobias Hankel; you've seen how the trauma affected him till this day.

You wondered if Spencer thought if he would get out alive. You wondered if, at some point in that cabin in the woods, he contemplated death as an alternative. Because God knew you were considering it.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

Aaron Hotchner marched forward to the backyard of the Knox Mansion as Derek Morgan went in through the backdoor. Spencer Reid and Jennifer Jereau were ordered to enter through the front door.

The two-story manor carried a sense of luxury, although the smell was of something rotten from years back.

It was clear that the inheritance Paul Knox gained from his father had vanished as it had come. The house was almost in ruins, the strong smell of mold all around the walls immediately hit the newcomers. Derek and Aaron met inside close to the living room.

“It's all clear around the kitchen, Rossi,” Derek said, looking around and studying his surroundings. He quickly covered his nose when the smell reached his nostrils. “What is that smell?!”

“I don't know,” Rossi replied, kicking a knocked-over chair. “ There's been a struggle.”

Derek nodded, pointing towards a line of blood leading to the kitchen. It ended there.

“We're running out of time.” Spencer walked in the kitchen with JJ on his trail. “This is useless. She won't be up here. The camera Garcia hacked showed a dark room and it pointed to a door. Possibly the only way in and out.”

JJ nodded in affirmation, shoulders tensing. “Maybe a basement? There's no guest house, right?”

“There's a basement outside.” Rossi clarified. “Hotch is searching there. JJ and Reid search the second floor, Morgan and Prentiss you take the attic. I'll check that ridiculously big greenhouse outside.”

“It's not a basement,” Spencer said, cursing under his breath. Everyone stared at him confusedly. “That was not a basement. It—It looks like one. It's supposed to look like one but didn't you see the bottles and the shelves in the footage? And the liquid when she—” he sucked in a breath. “That's a wine cellar.” He concluded. How couldn't he have seen it before? It was being thrown at his face.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

Hotch stepped towards the wood doors, drawing out his gun to tear apart the locket.

He tried as much as he could not to make a sound as he walked down the basement doors. If the smell in the house was bad, down there was suffocating.

“Paul, Paul listen to me! I'm sorry that I left, I'm sorry!”

He halted, surveying the area carefully. It was dark, but his weapon light helped him have a grip on his surroundings. That had definitely been your voice.

“Is Carina here?”

There was a pause.

Carina Grace. One of the missing girls, probably the eighteenth victim of Paul Knox.

“You told me I wasn't alone before, is she here, too, Paul?”

That was a bold move. Hotch knew what you were doing, despite the situation you were still doing your job, but this wouldn't end well.

“You have never been alone.”

Your crying out made him approach fast as he followed the sound. That place could fool anyone by the sight of it before you entered. The wood doors made it look like a small corner, but Hotch could see it as a masked labyrinth.

He kept aiming his gun ahead, entering a room of what he supposed was a wine cellar. Slow and steady steps guided by his instincts; his eyes surveyed every corner of the room until three tall shelves came into sight— and a shadow reflected by the sunlight that entered the only small window in the room.

His eyes narrowed when he saw it move and the silhouette of a gun was pressed to its hand. Hotch swiftly hid behind a near concrete pillar just as the man shot twice in the previous direction he had been in.

Idiot. Aaron mentally cursed, eyeing the only part of the room he hadn't checked yet, behind the shelves.

He saw a glimpse of metal. The UnSub was armed.

“Found her badge and bullet proof vest up here, Hotch.” JJ's voice rang through the radio. Loud enough for only Aaron to hear, thankfully. “The perimeters are being checked but I don't think—” He could hear the strain in her voice.

“The wine cellar isn't clear, yet.” Hotch said with his tone contained, eyes glued to the UnSub's shadow. He hasn't moved. What was this asshole planning to do? “He's here. Block all exits.”

“What about her?”

“She's here, too,” Hotch replied to Reid, squinting at the moving silhouette.

“You're in the basement, aren't you?” He breathed out at the sound of Emily's voice.

“Yes.”

“I'll meet you there.”

“There's another body here and he's armed.” Be careful.

Emily spoke to someone else and then he tuned everything out.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

“Spencer!” JJ tried to pull him back but he yanked his arm out of her reach, sprinting towards the backyard. “Would you calm down? You can't barge in like this!” She hissed in frustration.

He turned back and said through gritted-teeth. “If it were Will, would you be calm?”

She blinked at him, opening and closing her mouth in shock. “I—”

“You know how I feel, you've been there, so why do you keep asking me to calm down?” Spencer spat out.

JJ silently approached him by the entrance, swallowing the guilt her whole body was drowning in. “I'm sorry. I'm just trying to make you think, alright? Spence, she needs all of us. She needs you, so we need to think straight. Our goal is to get her out.” Alive.

“Do you think we can?”

He asked softly, voice small.

She squeezed his shoulder and widened the basement opening. “Yes, we can.” She stepped in, turning to him before he could enter. “Don't step away from me. We don't split up, ever, deal?”

That was something she always said whenever they were paired up in a situation like that. And that's when Spencer noticed that what he suffered didn't just affect him, but everyone else around him.

“Okay.”

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

Hotch had finally caught sight of you. He could see your frame in a corner of the wall, the sunlight didn't help him visualize anything, it was too minimal. He didn't know whether you were awake or— he couldn't see. “Paul, do you think your mother would be proud of that behavior? Killing women? Hurting them?” He needed to get closer and for that, he had to get inside his mind.

“You don't understand,” Paul said calmly. Hotch hears beneath that contained tone, he was a walking time bomb. But they were on countdown before your location was even found, the team knew who Paul was, they knew how he escalated in the last weeks, and they knew his weak spot, too.

“You're right,” Hotch said, craning his neck to the side when he saw your voice. More like a whimper. Low, discreet, but there. You were alive. And he intended on keeping that way. “I don't understand. I didn't go through what you did. I was not left in a house by someone that's supposed to care for me. I was not left to a parent that never loved me.”

Silence.

“Paul. She deserves everything you did to her. Every beating. Every truth spat out on her face. Every day locked up here. She was supposed to be a good mother back then, why is she trying now, after all.”

“She never loved me.”

Bingo.

“Is that what you think?”

There was shuffling around and then a gun was pointing directly at him, but Hotch had a shelf to cover behind. Paul was finally in his aim, vulnerable. Not yet.

“Do you think people change, Agent?” Paul asked him, cocking the gun at him mockingly. He then looked back at you, tongue moving across his lips slowly. “I don't think so. That's why I didn't kill her. Yet.”

You said something else but Hotch couldn't hear. He wasn't close enough. You weren't safe yet. Not yet.

The clock was ticking.

“For some people, death is just another way out.”

Everything happened so fast his mind didn't grasp it until it happened.

He heard a click. Then the sound of gunfire exploded through the wine cellar.

Paul Knox was on the floor, his head had two gunshot wounds on the forehead and blood leaked through it. Eyes wide open. He didn't see it coming.

Quick and effective.

A perfect aim to kill.

He thought it would be Emily at the entrance, gun pointing right at Paul's head. He's seen her frustration at herself for losing you that day, it was a matter of time until she snapped.

But he was met with Spencer Reid barging into the wine cellar instead. A stunned JJ frozen at the entrance.

Reid's movements carried no hesitation as he dashed towards the body, snatched the keys out of his pockets and stepped back to unlock the cage you were in.

It was foolish to check if he was still alive. Two shots to the head - that was the outcome Hotch didn't want. Paul Knox was supposed to go to jail for the rest of his life. Because of the victims he terrorized, because of the days he stole from one of his own that she would never get back.

“We found Carina.” Derek told him as they watched you being pulled into the ambulance. He didn't need to be told that they only found her body. Carina Grace had been missing for a month. “Same way as the other girls.”

“Safe to say he won't be dreaming about hurting anyone else.” Rossi made the comment as a body bag was transferred out of the wine cellar.

Hotch glanced towards Reid, who had just entered the ambulance by your side.

He would lecture him later. The only thing that mattered now was that you were safe.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

When you fluttered your eyes open, you quickly shut them again. The lights were strong and forceful. Light. Was this the sunlight? Had he dumped your body somewhere? Were you finally dead and this was your spirit floating over what was left of you?

You hadn't felt that cool air in days. It almost felt like air-conditioning. A soft fabric wrinkled between your fingers and your leg… you could move it. You could feel it. There was no numbness.

“Take a deep breath. It's okay, you're safe.”

You're hallucinating. Because what you were hearing didn't make any sense. It couldn't be. Your head was searching for ways to bring your relief. That's the only reasonable answer.

Reasonable. What about this situation is reasonable?

“You're safe,” He repeated.

You forced your eyelids open, despite the bothersome whiteness. The first thing you saw was Spencer, his honey brown eyes with heavy bags of sleepless nights around them, his soft smile that threatened to spill the sadness hanging over him.

You could touch his hand.

But the calm doesn't last for long.

“You're not here.” You snatched your fingers away.

This is not real. I'm dreaming again.

Hurt flashed through his eyes. “I am.”

“That's not you.”

“That's me, sweetheart. This is real, we got you out—”

“No!”

He flinched back, watching as the heart monitor went off. A group of nurses entered the room to check the commotion; it took five people to hold you down. He never saw you like that. That's anger, that pain. He'd never seen it in your eyes. JJ had to pull him out of the room otherwise he would stay there, frozen.

You weren't seeing him.

He provoked that nervous breakdown.

“Stop. Hey, don't do this,” he could feel air entering his lungs but his chest hurt. “Spencer, this isn't—”

“Don't.” He said shortly, shaking his head. “I shouldn't have…” He stared at his hands as if they had committed a crime, trying to blink away his tears.

“This isn't your fault, Spence.”

“I should've figured it out sooner.” He said, burying his head between his hands. “I do it all the time. Why couldn't I do it now, why couldn't I find her sooner?”

Sobs racked through his body and he felt arms wrapping around him some sort of comfort. He didn't feel it. He wanted you. He wanted to make you feel better, he didn't need to be taken care of. He didn't deserve it.

“It wasn't your fault,” JJ repeated, tightening her hold on him. “We were all in this. And she's fine now. She's safe.”

“She'll never be fine again.” He mumbled through her shirt. It physically pained him to see you like this, as if your mind was playing you. The worst was that he knew what that felt like. He wished he didn't. Actually, he wished that it was him instead. He'd go through it all again just to spare you of that trauma. That haunting pain that would follow you and make you doubt everything.

He didn’t mean that he didn’t want you to be fine, of course, he wanted it. That kind of trauma, however, doesn’t just let you go, it’s like a shadow looming over you, a tall ghost.

I should've found her sooner. He couldn't stop thinking that. I should've found her sooner.

An hour passed and nobody moved from the waiting room. They were anxious and on edge waiting for an update. Penelope had drifted off on Derek's shoulder a few minutes ago, Emily had bitten all of her cuticles as much as Rossi reprimanded her on it, Hotch would leave and come back with coffee refills and JJ had left a while ago to speak to Will and her kids. As for Spencer, he was just there. Not mentally, just physically.

He needed to see you okay to function again.

“She'll need you.” He snapped around to Hotch's voice. At some point, his feet reached the end of the hall, a cup of water in his hands. He wasn't even thirsty. “She'll need you when she wakes up. More than anyone else.” His boss added.

Spencer knew what he meant by that. It wasn't just in the literal sense.

“I know.” He responded.

“Then you need to be there.”

Get a grip on yourself.

“I will.” Spencer swallowed hard, looking up at him. “I will.” He repeated, throwing the cup on the trash can and taking a deep breath. Hotch squeezed his shoulder reassuringly on his way back.

When the doctor called him back to the room, you were already awake.

✫・゜・。✫・゜・。

“Spencer?”

You croaked out, blinking multiple times to undo the blurred image of the long-haired genius.

“Hi,” he replied, lowering to the seat beside your bed. You oversaw his movements carefully. He looked shaken up but he mustered one of those smiles you were done for from the first day you walked in the Bureau.

“Can you tell me something?” You requested, clearing your throat. You didn’t trust your senses, but it sounded and looked like your boyfriend. Your mind couldn’t play sturdy tricks like that, could it?

Outsretching your arm long enough to reach him, you nudged his hand. He pulled the chair closer and intertwined your fingers. That was the first time you felt warmth in days.

“What about?”

“Something only you would know.”

Bring me back to reality.

He sighed, lifting your palm to his cheek. “You hate the color gray,” his eyes locked into yours as he recalled your words from a few months ago when you had revealed this to him. “It was your brother's favorite color. He wore it all the time. When he died, you could never look at anything gray because it would remind you of him.”

You stayed quiet.

“You hate when people keep telling you to wear your hair down because it looks pretty. You know it does, but you feel uncomfortable with the strands touching your neck. You love sunlight the same amount you love cloudy days – not thunderstorms, you’re scared of those. Especially lightning.” You let out a tearful chuckle to which he grinned. “You have a tattoo on the inner side of your left thigh, it's the page number and the line order of your favorite Norwegian Wood edition, your favorite book. You had a secret obsession with the theme from that animated movie…” his voice trailed off, a crease between his brows.

“You mean Let it go from Frozen?”

Spencer’s lips twisted in a pout, “Sorry if I don’t know that much about pop culture.”

“You’re hopeless at it, Spence.”

“I’m not that bad.” He rolled his eyes, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “How are you feeling?” He asked, eyes softening. You traced the tip of his nose, eyes scanning his features so you’d cement it to your brain.

“Better,” you replied. It was the truth. He nodded, brushing a strand behind your ear gently. “Thank you.”

Spencer lifted his chin to glimpse at you, disappointment draping over his gaze. “I didn’t do anything.” Disappointment at himself. The failure that he was during the case when you needed him the most. You furrowed your brows at the tear trailing down his cheek, drying it with your thumb. Reaching for his arms, you waited until he adjusted enough at the edge of your bed so you could rest your head on his chest. His heartbeat rang through your ears like a long-awaited tune.

“I know you did, Spencer. All of you did. Hey,” you tapped his chin so he could meet your eyes. “I'm here, aren't I?”

He frowned. “You almost weren't.”

“But I am,” you insisted. Your gaze darkened and you shifted on the bed causing the thin blanket to fall off one of your legs. You were all bandaged up, literally. “You know, I… I lost track of time. After the first two days I nearly went crazy. I knew you'd find me but I— I—”

“You don't have to talk about it if you're not ready.” Spencer reassured you softly. He saw the way you stared at your legs, it was the scars beneath the bandages that you were seeing. And the ones beyond your body. “I love you,” he mumbled against your hair, caressing your arms and cradling you into his hold. “We got you out. You're safe now, alright? I promise.”

You resigned with a long breath, burying your face in his shoulder. That heaviness brewing over your thoughts vanished under his touch, wrapping safety around you instead.

“I love you too, Spencer.” You said, curling into his side. Now that you knew you were safe, you could feel the exhaustion weighing down your eyelids. “Can you stay?”

He hummed, tucking his chin above your head and shifting on the bed for a better position. It wasn't the most comfortable setting and you two would probably — certainly — wake up with your backs hurting. But Spencer would do anything for you.

“I won't go anywhere, don't worry.”

That was what comfort felt like. You weren't dreaming. That was real.

The nightmare was finally over.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“Isn’t it funny how day by day

nothing changes,

but when you look back,

everything is different. ”

[C.S. Lewis]

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

sources used: [1]; [2]; [3]

taglist: @lilyviolets

#criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid angst #criminal minds imagine #countdown

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things-arent-what-they-seem66 · 2 months ago

Note

What about an AU where it’s not Adam and Eve but Adam and Lucifer.

Lilith and Adam are created from the dust as equals as usual to make love to each other, but Adam instead falls in love with Lucifer after Lilith being a little shit to him.

Out of spite for being denied control of Adam and losing him to an angel, Lilith leaves the garden. Angels, not accepting how Adam might not want to lie with women, make him a new wife, Eve. But he doesn’t want her either, just down for his little angel. And makes it clear one night.

That shatters Eve’s world and makes her incredibly devastated as she thinks she failed in serving her husband and making him happy with her that he doesn’t want her. She gets away from him for a while and begins searching for a cure.

Only to stumble to Lilith of all people, who had returned to the garden after hearing about the new bride she could trick easier.

She leads her to the Tree of Knowledge, and says all she has to do is to bite from the apple and get Adam to do so too -But she can’t tell him what it is, that way it wouldn’t work- if she wants them to be truly happy like the angels told them they would be.

In desperation and cause she had no idea what lying was, Eve accepts, takes two apples from the tree, brings them to where she and Adam sleep, and gets Adam to eat it by saying it’s a regular fruit. Which causes sin to enter the world.

After noticing it, the angels were simply going to throw the two to Earth and Lilith to Hell, but how Lilith screamed about Adam loving Lucifer and that was why he denied to lie with women caused a problem.

Adam and Lucifer both denied it violently, but how Lucifer tried too hard to get the angels to let Adam and Eve stay, how much time they spent before and how close they were physically for most only fueled their suspicions.

So, they decided to look into their memories and see that they were clearly in love. In one they admit it, in one they kiss intimately and in one Lucifer is literally making love to Adam.

And that makes them furious.

They rip Lucifer from his status as an angel, and make him Adam’s new wife instead by giving him both a woman’s and a man’s parts, they do the same to Adam, and also put a baby fever curse on the pair so they would have no escape in populating the Earth where they are sent afterwards. Eve is sent too, but she goes to a completely different place all alone and lives a life of isolation.

Either Lucifer is mostly forced to submit and be the one pregnant because of the curse and how the angels wanted to humiliate him for being with a human, or Adam is because the angels officialy took his title as the first man away and “downgraded him into the level of woman he was too good for”.

I like them both a lot so I’ll just make two versions.

Wow, got a little longer than I thought there..

Whaddya think?

Wow that's sad and amazing. I like both ideas but you know me lol

Adam being "downgraded" when really it makes him happy to have kids with his love.

#adamsapple #hazbin hotel adam #hazbin hotel lucifer #ask

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philomenie · 3 months ago

Text

KILLING ME SOFTLY

Hitman!Jolly - Part 1

CN murder, violence, sex, organized crime, blood, mention of child murder 18+

@jilliemiw86 @nojoyontheburn @reyadawn

TWO

Instead of driving straight to his apartment, Jolly drives to the hospital where Olivia works, parks his car on the opposite side of the road, right in front of the entrance, turns off the engine and looks at the building.

What is he doing here anyway, he thinks to himself, shaking his head. It's complicated enough as it is and he shouldn't be intruding on Olivia's life in any way. It's enough that he lives next door to her and talks to her.

He's putting her in danger by doing that and by his mere presence here. In mortal danger and that is the very last thing he wants.

But as if by an invisible bond, Jolly is magically drawn to Olivia again and again. When she is working, especially at night, he makes sure that nothing happens to her unless he is needed elsewhere. Watches her, protects her. He has spent hours in the emergency room just to be near her or waiting outside the hospital to make sure that she gets home safely.

Since their first encounter, he has fallen for her, as he now admits. He can't explain it to himself, but Olivia brings out a side in him that he never thought existed. He doesn't even know why that is.

He divides his life so far into two sections, before and after, normality and hell. However, if he is honest with himself, he would have to add another section right now..... Hope. But he doesn't want to do that, because the tender seedling that is germinating inside him could be destroyed too quickly. So he clears his mind of such things and leans back, making himself comfortable in his seat and keeping an eye on the entrance. He waits until Olivia finishes her shift and goes home.

As he broods, lost in thought, he misses the car that has followed him and has also come to a halt a little further away from his position, just as he parks and waits.

Jolly is haunted by flashes of memories of the past, which come back every now and then when he tries to relax, to calm down.

Memories that are painful and that he would rather forget. Memories of his family that no longer exist. Wiped out and massacred in the Succession War in which Semjon was able to triumph within the organization.

Because on that cursed day, Semjon was stupidly eating at his parents' restaurant. A coincidence, because the "Maritime" was not one of Semjon's usual restaurants where he used to eat. Only that day was different....

On this shitty day, Semjon had to propose to Inga, Kolja's mother, and chose his parents' restaurant for the occasion... to create a special atmosphere, away from the usual routine and away from the structures of the organization.

Semjon had rented the entire "Maritime" for the occasion in order to be undisturbed. Only a handful of bodyguards were still with him, as well as his parents and two members of the kitchen staff. Jolly can't even remember their names, just a blur of their faces.

He was still small, if not tiny, at the time. He and his siblings, his older brother Niclas and his little sister Linnea, were staying in the restaurant's private rooms that day. The two rooms included an office and a playroom/bedroom for the children and, for example, the parents, if they had no one to babysit their children or it was too late to drive back to their house outside Stockholm....

The fact that Semjon was in Sweden at all is just as incredible a coincidence as everything else. He had retreated to Sweden to prepare himself for the decisive blow against his opponents and Sweden was close at hand, as he was madly in love with Inga, whom he wanted to make his next wife and who came from Sweden, or rather Stockholm.

Fortune was not at all kind to Jolly and his family on this shitty day...…

Linnea was already asleep and he and Niclas were still playing when all hell broke loose and Semjon's opponents' men stormed the restaurant, shooting at anything that moved. The fact that Semjon and Inga survived was nothing short of a miracle.

Jolly knows from stories that his parents must have died almost immediately. His father must have tried to protect his mother, but both were riddled with bullets. Just like the staff in the kitchen.

Apart from two bodyguards, one of whom was Oleg, Nadja's father, they also died in the hail of bullets. Semjon, Inga, Oleg and the other made it out of the building through the back door after a fierce battle in which most of the attackers were killed.

He remembers exactly how he and Niclas heard the shooting, their hearts pounding and their eyes filled with fear, and Linnea woke up and cried. Niclas then picked her up and hugged her to his chest.

He was almost 9 years old at the time and Linnea was just 2.

When the door was kicked open, Niclas stood rooted to the spot with his sister in his arms. Jolly himself ran into his parents' office, squeezing into the narrow gap between the wall and the desk, hidden from the attackers' view. When the shots rang through the silence, Jolly had to bite his hand to stop himself from crying out loud, because he knew immediately what the shots meant.

The killers must not have seen him, because when he calmed down a little and the noise in his ears subsided, he could hear nothing but silence......

He didn't dare come out for fear that someone might still be there.

When he heard footsteps again and men talking in a language that was foreign to him, he thought he would die of panic and heart-rending whimpers came from his throat, so that he was finally found. By Semjon and his men.

It took a long time for them to drag him out of his hiding place, and in the process he got the long scar on his back from cutting himself on a sharp piece of metal sticking out of the wall.

Screaming, wriggling, thrashing around and bleeding, Oleg held him down, unsure what to do with him.

Knowing Oleg now, he would probably have preferred to dispose of him straight away, to kill him, but Semjon was against it.

I bet you wish you'd killed me then, Oleg, Jolly thinks grimly, a sneer on his lips at the thought that he is now fucking Oleg's daughter.

Jolly later asks Semjon why he took him with him, why he didn't have him killed or simply left him there, and gets the following explanatory answer: "You fought, you showed that you were strong, even though you were still so small!"

That is perhaps his biggest mistake, to fight to the last breath even when it seems hopeless.....

Semjon brought Jolly into the organization as his protégé, making him a child of the organization with no chance of escaping. That is now his fate.....

The next few years were hard, he was drilled mercilessly until he was old enough to fight back, then things got better. When Semjon, who had almost forgotten him, realized how good he was with weapons, he quickly became the man for discreet kills and his rise in the organization began.

Sighing, Jolly leans his head against the headrest of his car, he should know better, this could be the mistake of his life..... So far he hasn't made a mistake, well the one with Nadja, but he only touched her when he had Semjon's permission to do so....

But this.... Involving a bystander in the criminal, brutal machinations of the Russian mafia.... Absolute madness!

Jolly knows that if something like this happened, the women were either eliminated or brought into the organization. He wants neither for Olivia. But then what does he want from her at all..…

He wants a piece of his peace of mind back, perhaps this is possible by making sure that nothing happens to Olivia in this distorted picture of normality. He makes sure that she can live her life, that it isn't completely turned upside down like his and so many others who didn't even know why or wherefore, just because they met the wrong people or were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Like his family.... Like him......

It is already getting light when he sees Olivia leaving the hospital. Even from a distance, he can see how tired and exhausted she looks. She's rummaging in her large handbag, how can she possibly find anything in there, Jolly thinks, as a man approaches and speaks to her.

Frowning, Jolly sits up, sharpens his gaze and tenses up, mainly because Olivia flinches and pulls away from his grip on her elbow.

Jolly can't hear anything, but he can see enough to know that Olivia is shouting at the guy, who is arguing back. Enraged, she storms off, he can make out the flash of her eyes all the way here, the guy after her.

He drums nervously on his steering wheel, FUCK, what should he do now?

Without thinking further, he reaches for the case, takes out his new gun and the magazine for it, loads it and pulls the trigger, sticks it in the back of his waistband and gets out. He smoothes his shirt so that the gun is concealed and runs across the street.

His pursuers become aware of this and one of them also gets out, following Jolly at a safe distance so that he does not become aware of him.

Jolly is oblivious to his surroundings at the moment, something that never happens to him, his focus is on Olivia and the guy running after her, talking to her over and over again.

Anger wells up inside Jolly, what the hell does he want from her and who is he anyway?

Since he's been in contact with Olivia, she's never had any male visitors and when he asked her, as if in passing, about a partner during an innocuous conversation, she denied both and then looked at him waiting, questioningly....

He then explained that a woman had no place in his life and never would, to which Olivia nodded with a raised eyebrow.

The guy continues to chase Olivia, who stubbornly walks towards the subway with her head down and disappears down the stairs. The guy shouts after her.

Jolly quickens his steps to almost catch up with the man. A quick sideways glance is enough to give him another impression of him. He is tall, about the same height as him, has dark hair that is cut short, looks well toned and has pleasant features in themselves, though distorted by the anger that reigns within him.

Olivia has also quickened her steps and is now almost running to the subway, hurrying inside. The doors close behind her and the train starts to move.

FUCK! The guy next to Jolly yells and hits his thigh with his fist, getting upset.

Jolly looks at him with lowered eyelids. His clothes seem high quality, if not expensive. The watch he's wearing is a Breitling... anything but cheap. His signet ring shows the staff of Asclepius. So doctor.... Jolly also appreciates being from a rich family.

He stands there calmly and watches the man walk up and down, swearing to himself, and then run back up the steps and out into the street.

Jolly stays on his heels.

The man walks to the hospital parking garage and is about to get into his Audi when Jolly grabs him from behind and pushes him against the car, pressing the gun into his back.

Jolly looks around quickly, there is no one to be seen, the surveillance cameras do not reach the entire corner of the parking garage.

The man under his grip begins to tremble, swallows several times, "You can have my money...." he gasps and tries to reach for his wallet.

"Don't!" grumbles Jolly quietly, trying to disguise his accent.

"What... what do you want from me?" the guy stammers.

Yes, what does he actually want from him? This action right now is more than stupid and completely ill-conceived. Jolly has let his feelings guide him, not even remotely thinking about what this can and will do.....

Actually, he should kill the guy now.... But Jolly hesitates.

"The doctor...." he hisses.

"Olivia??!" the man is astonished and wants to turn around.

"NOT!" Jolly growls dangerously.

"What... what does Olivia have to do with this?" gasps the man.

Just everything, Jolly thinks to himself.

"The doctor, keep your hands off her!" he rumbles.

The man freezes, "Olivia?" he asks again.

Jolly rolls his eyes in annoyance, is this guy somehow stupid? He presses the pistol harder into his back, his kidneys, causing the man to whimper in pain. What a wimp, Jolly thinks contemptuously.

"Leave her alone!" he grumbles quietly.

"Olivia??" whimpers the man.

Jolly has to fight down the impulse to pull the trigger, so he growls, "YES! Don't push her again, keep your hands off her or you'll regret it! Do you understand that?"

"Yes, yes.... Please...." the guy whimpers pathetically.

Jolly grabs the man by his hair and rams his head against the frame of the car, causing the man to scream and collapse. He lies on the ground whimpering, holding his bleeding nose. Jolly bends over him from behind, "This never happened! You don't go to the police, don't tell anyone or I'll come back......"

Startled, the man whimpers again, but at the same time nods his head vigorously, "I'm not talking to anyone!" he swears immediately.

"Good!" Jolly pats his head, stands up, puts his gun back in the back of his pants and slowly walks back to the exit as if nothing had happened.

He doesn't notice his shadow, which has been watching and listening to all this.

When Jolly gets out of the elevator, Olivia is standing in front of her apartment door, struggling with her door key. The door is stuck again. Something that happens all the time.

Frantically, she kicks the door, then screams at it, "DAMN!"

Jolly approaches her from behind, reaches for the door key, which is still in the lock but won't budge.

As if stung by a tarantula, Olivia scoots around to him, staring at him with wide eyes, terrified.

She looks enchanting, he thinks, seeing how individual brown strands have come loose from her bun and gently frame her face, how her cherry-red mouth is slightly open and her emerald-green eyes are shining......

Jolly has to clear his throat, "Can I help?" he asks quietly.

"Um...." Olivia pulls herself together, then nods, "Yes, please... the fucking key's stuck, the lock's jammed again. I can't get the fucking door open!"

Jolly smiles and gently pushes her aside, "Let me do it!"

It's easy for him to unlock the key again and open the door. So far, he has managed to open every door lock.

"You need a new lock!" he explains, "This one is broken!"

"I know!" sighs Olivia, "It's urgently needed!"

"Urgently needed?" asks Jolly, noticing her tone of voice.

"Yes....." Olivia throws her hands in the air, "Oh, forget it!"

Jolly raises an eyebrow, looking at her questioningly.

Olivia rolls her eyes, "My ex!" she then sighs.

"Oh!" nods Jolly, thinking about the asshole he just told to leave Olivia alone.

"Yeah.... Nothing wild really, but he won't leave me in peace since he got back!" she explains.

"Has he been away?" Jolly wants to know.

"Yes, a year in Spain!" Olivia nods and yawns.

"You're tired!" says Jolly.

"Yes, I am!" sighs Olivia.

"Then.... I'd better leave you alone!" he nods.

"Hmm," Olivia mumbles vaguely and looks at him.

Jolly can hardly tear himself away from her gaze.

Olivia's gaze flits briefly to her apartment before she looks at Jolly again, "Um, do you want to come in for a coffee?" she asks quietly, "I'm tired, but I'm still a bit buzzed, I can't sleep like this anyway...." she explains hastily.

Jolly is struck by lightning. What should he do now? He knows he has to stay away from her, but standing next to her now, talking to her, feels so good. So familiar, so he nods without thinking further, "I'd love to!"

Olivia beams at him and pushes her door open, "Come on then!" she smiles.

Jolly looks around inconspicuously. Her apartment has the same layout as his, but the furnishings are completely different from his.

While his is plain, orderly simplicity and muted, rather bright colors, Olivia's furnishing style can at best be described as chaotic and an explosion of color.

His heart constricts as he looks around her living area. It reminds him painfully of his parents' living room. It was colorful, warm and cozy there too.

Olivia has a large dark green velvet couch with colourful cushions and patchwork blankets as the central point in the room, a solid wooden coffee table in front of it, two stools and two expansive armchairs nestled around it, all in different shades of green that harmonize wonderfully together. A light, soft carpet underneath completes everything.

The walls are lined with shelves overflowing with books and a massive antique cupboard. Where there is space, there are pictures, photos and posters.

The large floor-to-ceiling window is adorned with a heavy, dark green velvet curtain in the same color as the couch.

"Sit wherever you can find space!" Olivia smiles apologetically and hurriedly removes individual items of clothing that are strewn across the upholstered furniture.

Jolly's gaze lingers on a black lace bra and he has to pull himself together not to imagine Olivia in it.... And only in it....

Jolly pushes the cushions to one side and takes a seat on the couch. On the coffee table in front of him are various specialist journals, medical textbooks, but also a novel by Jane Austen.

Curious, Jolly picks it up, leafs through it and reads individual sections.

"My favorite novel ...." smiles Olivia as she leans against the doorway to the kitchen area, "I've read Pride and Prejudice at least 10 times, if not more!" she nods.

"Hmm, I haven't once...." admits Jolly.

"I wouldn't have expected that!" she laughs warmly and Jolly's heart tightens.

"I do read!" he defends himself.

"But not romance novels from another century!" Olivia adds teasingly.

"Hm, maybe!" Jolly shrugs his shoulder and puts the novel down again.

"Milk? Sugar?" Olivia wants to know from him, "But I only have cow's milk and white sugar here!" she adds.

"Both please and both perfectly ok for me!" smiles Jolly.

"Phew, lucky you!" Olivia laughs and puts the carton of milk and the jar with sugar and a spoon in it in front of him, goes back and gets the coffee for herself and him.

Olivia sits down across from him in an armchair, half curls up in it and takes a sip from her mug, "Hmm, just what I needed!" she groans in pleasure.

"Hard shift?" Jolly wants to know and also takes a sip of his coffee.

"Hmm, the usual...." waves Olivia off, "Blood, screaming, some drama and the occasional nice patient!"

"Hmm," nods Jolly, thinking to himself that their work is similar in a way. He knows enough about blood and drama and screaming.

"About your ex then?" Jolly probes quietly.

Olivia sighs, "Michael...." she mumbles, "Yeah, probably. He's..... complicated! He won't accept that I've left him." she explains.

"Hmm" Jolly nods, THAT problem should have been solved, he thinks to himself and smiles as he takes another sip from his cup.

"And you? Were you out?" she wants to know and scrutinizes him, running her eyes over his body.

"Not exactly.... More like a business engagement... a professional meeting that I couldn't avoid!" he explains, stretching.

Olivia narrows her eyes, "WHAT are you actually doing? Sorry to ask so directly, you don't have to answer.... I mean, sorry, forget the question.... I'm just way too direct sometimes.... Speak before I think."

Jolly laughs softly to himself, then looks her in the eye, seeing the slight blush that has crept onto her cheeks.

"Hmm, I'm something of a personal assistant, bodyguard for an important man!" he describes his job, "Solving problems for him!" he explains further. Usually for good, he adds in his mind.

"Oh!" Olivia looks at him with wide eyes, "Isn't that dangerous?" she wants to know.

"Hmm, I'm quite good at it!" he smiles, "As you can see, I'm still alive!"

"Lucky for you!" Olivia blurts out, her cheeks darkening a touch more, "Um, I mean, good thing you're good at it!" she explains quickly, drinking hastily from her cup.

Jolly's eyes rest on her under lowered lids. FUCK, he needs to get out of here! He has to distance himself from her again, he doesn't know if he can control himself otherwise as he would love to pull her into his arms and kiss her.....

Just as he's about to get up and say goodbye with an excuse, the next question comes from Olivia.

"I've just realized, I don't even know your name!" she blurts out.

"Jo...." begins Jolly and wants to say Jolly because EVERYONE calls him that, he got this nickname from Semjon and it's been HIS name ever since. But he stops, thinks for a moment and then decides on his real name, the name his parents gave him. "Joakim!" he declares.

"Joakim...." Olivia lets it slide over her tongue, hitting the right pronunciation, "It suits you! Where is it from?"

"Sweden!" Jolly whispers harshly.

"Ahh, hence the slight accent, I thought it must be something European!" she smiles warmly at him.

"Hmm, I'm from Sweden, but I've been here in America for as long as I can remember!" he mumbles.

Olivia looks at him questioningly, "Because your parents moved here?"

"My parents are dead!" Jolly explains gruffly, "I was raised here by..... relatives!" which is a little closer to the truth, because the organization is a kind of family.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean...." apologizes Olivia hastily.

"It's ok, that was over 30 years ago... I barely remember it!" waves Jolly off.

"I really didn't mean to.... Please, I...." Olivia tries.

Jolly smiles at her, "It's all right! I just don't like talking about it!"

"Hmm" Olivia nods, not fully convinced.

Jolly realizes that he has just revealed far too much about himself. Also something that is completely out of character for him. Even to Nadja he never talks about his family, doesn't want her to refer to him as Joakim.

"Um, I have to go now!" he declares and stands up.

Olivia looks at him, then nods, "Yes, I should go to bed now too!" she mumbles and gets up.

"Sit still, I'll find my own way out!" Jolly shakes his head and takes a step towards her, ramming the coffee table with his leg, causing the cup to slide as he hastily placed it on the pile of books.

Jolly and Olivia reach for it at the same time and both get hold of the cup. Their hands are on top of each other. Jolly's over Olivia's.

Her skin is infinitely soft and rather cool, his hand calloused and warm. Electric shivers race through Jolly's body just from this touch and he notices how the fine hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

Instinctively, his fingers slide between hers, his thumb gently stroking her skin. When he looks up, looks at Olivia, her eyes burn into his soul. Dark green and unfathomable, they rest on him.

Jolly has to swallow, time stands still for a moment as they stare at each other.

Neither he nor she dares to move for fear that the moment will be irretrievably gone. So they stare quietly into each other's eyes until Jolly's cell phone buzzes audibly in his pocket, shattering the moment.

Apologetically, Jolly pulls his hand back and takes out his cell phone. Semjon.....

"Um...it....." he swallows, "I have to get this!"

Olivia nods dumbly, watching after him as he walks to the door, taking the call as he does so, opening the door and disappearing.

Jolly is completely confused, what the fuck has just happened. He answers Semjon with a corresponding lack of concentration, having not even heard what he said to him.

"Uh, what?" he gasps and unlocks his apartment door.

"You should come. Now!" Semjon growls at him.

"Give me five minutes and I'll be on my way!" promises Jolly.

"All right, but hurry up. I've got something for you to do!" Semjon grumbles.

"I see! I'm on my way!" nods Jolly.

When he hangs up, he has to lean against the wall and take a deep breath.

FUCK, this must not happen again under any circumstances. He has to avoid Olivia like the devil avoids holy water, otherwise he's doomed and so is Olivia!!!

#joakim jolly karlsson #joakim karlsson #jolly #jolly karlsson #bad omens band #bad omens cult #bad omens #joakim karlsson fanfiction #jolly fanfiction #fanfiction #bad omens fanfiction

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dyns33 · 2 years ago

Text

True love kiss

Dream of the endless x female reader

Careful, spoilers if you didn’t read the comics.

The Kindly Ones didn't really live up to their name. There was really nothing nice about them, although their function did not require them to show kindness, but to bring justice and punishment after a serious crime had been committed.

Normally, Morpheus and his entire kingdom should have been wiped out after the murder of his son. Infanticide could not be tolerated.

But the Kindly Ones listened to Caliope's complaint. They listened to the story of the young Delight, now Delirium, who had lost her mind long ago, while remaining the wisest of them all.

Although the crime was proven, Orpheus had requested that his father release him from his condition, so that his aunt could be able to take him to his wife. They couldn't not punish him, but they could accept mitigating circumstances.

A choice was therefore made.

"We won't destroy your kingdom, Master of Dreams. Not right away anyway. But you've spent your entire existence hurting others, behaving selfishly, refusing to see what you are. We are wondering if you really deserve to stay, or if a replacement wouldn't be better. So here is our verdict. Like those who enter your realm, you will fall asleep, and only someone who loves you, and who has always loved you, feeling no bitterness towards you, can ward off this fate. The longer it takes, the more your power will decline, and your sister will have to come and put an end to all this, before the dreams become only a vague memory. We have spoken."

Dream didn't have time to answer that it would probably be faster to destroy him now, because he couldn't see who could have loved him without ever resenting him. He fell asleep, and the Kindly Ones let the dreams take care of their unconscious creator.

It had not been specified what form of love it was, so the other Endless came to see their brother, and each of them spoke to him, took his hand, and kissed him on the cheek, but without result.

They had all had, during their long existence, a quarrel with Morpheus, and although they all loved him, their relationship was not perfect.

It was exactly the same with his former lovers. Most of them didn't even agree to come, or only to have the pleasure of seeing him fragile and vulnerable.

The others secretly hoped to wake him up, thereby regaining his love, their place by his side, and a chance to rule the dream realm.

"Good thing that freaky woman didn't make it. She kissed the boss for almost five minutes, yuck ! I felt like pulling her hair to pull her away."

"The noble fairy queen Titania is not a freaky woman, Matthew."

"I thought she was married ?"

"She is, Mervyn. Fairies don't care about that sort of thing. There's some repairs to be done in the north wing, please. Matthew and I will find something else."

"Quick, Luce. I can try to fix it, but if the boss doesn't wake up soon, it won't help."

All dreams and nightmares had also tried, at Lucienne's request and because they didn't want to die with their creator, but none of them seemed to love him enough to lift the curse.

After several days, there were only two options left.

"Option one, we must seek out a mortal. We have asked all other beings that exist and know of Lord Morpheus."

"And the second option ?" Matthew asked, tilting his head.

"... We accept that we are going to disappear."

"I'm going to the Waking world. Although I'm not sure who to look for."

Dream had never been very close to the dreamers, let alone mortal dreamers. He didn't really hold them in his heart, considering that humans were terribly selfish and cruel. It hadn't really improved since his confinement.

Yet he had some friends on Earth. In any case people with whom he discussed, like Constantine, Mad Hetty, Rose or Hob.

They were all shocked to learn what was happening to the master of stories, and they agreed to try to help, but again, it didn't yield any results.

All hope seemed lost.

"So it's over ? There's nothing to be done ? Everyone tried and nothing worked ?"

"No, Robert Gadling, nothing worked."

"Damn. Not even with Y/N ? Damn."

"... Who is Y/N ?"

The librarian had vaguely heard of Y/N. A friend of Hob, a strange young girl, with whom Lord Morpheus often argued. When he spoke of her, it was to repeat how annoying she could be.

"They adore each other." Hob said with a big smile. "They're dumb and shy. Once they're in the same room, they can't stop yelling at each other to hide their feelings. I thought it was funny at first. Now it's kind of boring."

"Even if you were right about the feelings they might have for each other, I don't think that's what we're looking for. The person has to love them, have always loved them, with no resentment."

"I don't think they've ever really argued over anything. Anything real I mean. Y/N asks me about him all the time, pretending not to care about the answer, but she freaks out if I say he's not well. She criticizes him, but always finds good excuses for him despite everything. She is convinced that he will never be able to fall in love with someone like her, but she remains hopeful. In any case, she dreams of being with him. We could try."

It wouldn't cost anything to try, so Matthew went to visit Y/N to explain the situation.

At first, as Hob had said, she was very attentive and obviously ready to follow him to help Dream. Then the raven explained to her what she should do, and she seemed more hesitant.

"... I don't understand what you want from me."

"Well, we don't really know. Being there, for sure, telling him you love him, or showing him. A kiss, maybe. That works well in storytelling."

"... I have to tell Morpheus I love him and kiss him ? Why would I do that ?"

"To help him ? If it works, that'll be great."

"No, it won't be 'great'." replied the young woman, grimacing. "He'll laugh at me. Or he'll pity me, not knowing how to tell me he doesn't feel the same way. We won't be able to stay friends. I'll be ashamed !"

"I don't think the boss will laugh."

"Sorry, I don't think so either. He'll be nice, he'll try not to hurt me."

"Or will he tell you that he loves you too ?"

"You are funny, little raven." Y/N sighed, stroking his head. "What if it doesn't work?"

"So we are lost."

It didn't make her happy, but Y/N ended up entering the Dreaming with Matthew, accompanying him to Morpheus's bedside, who still hadn't moved.

There was a lot of hesitation. A long discussion with Lucienne, Merv and Matthew. Insults towards Hob, for having talked too much. The fear of being humiliated. The certainty that it wouldn't work, because even though Y/N vaguely admitted to being in love, that didn't mean that she had never been mad at Morpheus. There was also the possibility that it wouldn't work because he didn't love her back.

But Y/N really loved the master of dreams, so she approached him, ready to try anything to make him wake up.

The kiss was quick. Almost shy. She backed away to a corner of the room, not knowing if she wanted to see the outcome, or what outcome she would have wanted to see.

Then there was a movement.

"Glad you're back with us, boss."

"Thank you Matthew. What happened ?"

"Well..." Lucienne began.

"Nothing. Nothing happened, we are all happy with this happy ending, and I would like to go home, now."

Dream watched Y/N for a long time, probably wondering what she was doing here, but he nodded before waving his hand to send her back to her house as she had requested.

Like his subjects, part of him wanted to respect her request for silence.

Something had happened and she didn't want to talk about it. But Morpheus was curious by nature. He didn't like not knowing, especially if it concerned him and his kingdom.

Several times he tried to understand, by asking specific questions, but the librarian was far too intelligent to be fooled, Mervyn pretended not to understand, the two brothers went to hide in their house.

Only Matthew seemed ready to give in, torn between his loyalty to his creator, and his gratitude to Y/N.

It was a human who offered him the answer. A human who always offered the answers.

"I'm really very happy to see you again, my friend. You're early."

"I'm also glad to be back, Hob Gadling. I deserved my punishment, but the world needs me. I'm a necessity."

"So how did things turn out in the end ? Y/N wouldn't tell me."

"It is complicated."

"Everything is always complicated with you, my friend. I don't understand why. She loves you. The kiss proves it, showing that she never held a grudge. And maybe it shows that you love her too. Yes, she's mortal, but she could become like me. It's really not that complex."

"She's right, you're too talkative." sighed the raven. "I should have agreed to go and poke your head when she asked me... Boss ? Where's the boss ?!"

"Sleeping Beauty is probably on his way to find his princess."

"Alright, that's it, I'm going to prick your head, you asked for it."

Meanwhile, Y/N was trying not to jump as Morpheus appeared in her bathroom. Fortunately, she was already in her pajamas, but she hesitated to throw her comb in his face.

"I troubled you." whispered the master of dreams with a strange look. "Forgive me."

"I guess endless beings don't really have the concept of doors, privacy, and showers. Do you shower ? No, you have to have magical skin and hair that's always clean."

"Technically, we don't have bodies or hair."

"What can I do for you ?" she asked hesitantly, hoping he wasn't there to talk about what had happened, definitely not ready to have her heart broken.

"Hob explained to me that you saved me."

"Hmm."

"By kissing me."

"Hmm."

"Because you are in love with me."

"Hmm hmm."

"You are very troubled now." he said again, still with that look. He seemed scared, which wasn't normal. A child who thought he had done something stupid, and that he was going to be punished by being abandoned on the side of the road.

During their short trip to the Dreaming, Matthew had spoken a bit about his master's love life. He had heard rumors, and he had seen certain disasters. Dream was really bad when it came to relationships. All kinds of relationships, with his family, with his subjects, with those who wanted to be his friends, and with his lovers.

He was always saying or doing something that upset them, hurt them, and make them leave.

The proof was that they had all tried to wake him up, and that none of them had succeeded, because they had all at least once felt some resentment towards him.

All except Y/N.

There were times when he could be a real pain, but she never really blamed him, forgiving him right away, because he wasn't human, he didn't understand everything, and especially because she couldn't resist his big eyes and desperate pout, when he was unable to apologize, while not wanting to lose her.

That was what was happening now. Although she wasn't sure yet why he had come, Morpheus was afraid to act like the idiot he could be, and scare away the only person who had shown unfailing affection for him.

"I'm probably confused because you are here to tell me that you are grateful, but that you prefer that we remain friends. I would have understood that without you having to come see me."

"I'm not here for that."

"Hmm."

"I still find it hard to believe that you ever hated me, even a little bit. And I can't guarantee that you'll never have reason to hate me. The Kindly Ones cast this spell on me to a good reason. But if you... If I..."

Y/N silenced him by pressing her lips against his, before pulling away just as quickly, waiting for cries of anger.

Instead, Morpheus looked shocked for a brief moment, before throwing himself on her to kiss her again and again, much better at it than speaking.

Maybe that wasn't what the Kindly Ones had planned, certain that no one could truly love Dream of the Endless, dooming him to die and be replaced.

Or they were giving him one chance, one last chance, and if he didn't stop behaving like a selfish fool, hurting and losing Y/N, then he would be alone on top of his mountain, and he would call his older sister to put an end to his stupidity.

But for the moment everything was fine, the Dreaming was here, its inhabitants were safe, and Morpheus continued to kiss Y/N, full of love, fear and gratitude.

#Sandman #The Sandman #morpheus #morpheus x reader #morpheus fanfiction #morpheus imagine #dream of the endless #dream of the endless imagine #dream of the endless x reader #dream of the endless fanfiction

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petalsthefish · 27 days ago

Text

How Did It End?

jilytober shuffle song fest day #11 with song "How Did It End" by Taylor Swift. READ ON A03 Yes, this one killed me to write, thanks for asking. I was also devastated that I couldn't fit "my beloved ghost, and me, sitting in a tree, D-Y-I-N-G" into this fic, but rest assured I will find a way to use it before the end of this jilytober

"We hereby conduct this post-mortem," Erica Sanders said, her voice steady as she snapped on her gloves. She cast a quick, sidelong glance at her partner, Frank Longbottom, who stood stiffly beside her. His face had drained of all color, as pale as the lifeless bodies that lay on the ground.

Frank had known the victims in life. Now, those same faces lay frozen in death, and he couldn’t seem to reconcile the sight. His hands were clenched at his sides, knuckles white from the tension that coursed through him like a taut wire ready to snap. "Right," he murmured, his voice barely audible, as if speaking any louder might shatter what little resolve he had left.

Erica hesitated for a moment, her practiced professionalism wavering as she noticed the pain etched across her partner's face. Her eyes softened with concern, a rare crack in her otherwise composed demeanor. "I can call someone else if you'd rather," she whispered, leaning closer, her voice low and comforting. It was an offer of escape, one she rarely made, but Frank's distress was palpable. She had seen him like this only once before—back when they had discovered the massacre at the McKinnon estate. The memory of bodies strewn across the room in grim silence, blood painting the walls, still haunted her. "You don’t have to stay."

Frank shook his head, almost imperceptibly at first, as if he wasn’t entirely sure of his answer. But then he stiffened, resolve hardening despite the overwhelming grief that threatened to consume him. The weight of the moment pressed down on his shoulders, and his breath hitched as he tried to steady himself. His eyes, clouded with sorrow, flickered over the bodies. "He was a reckless kid," Frank muttered, his voice breaking as emotion surged to the surface. "And she... she was my wife’s friend . I can’t believe this. It seemed–they were basically just kids. Damn it!” The final words came out as a strangled curse, his frustration too great to contain any longer.

Without warning, his frustration boiled over. Frank lashed out, kicking a nearby pram with enough force to send it skidding across the hall, the clang echoing in the space. The outburst left him panting, but it did little to ease the turmoil inside him.

Erica’s frown deepened, her heart aching for him in a way that surpassed the professional detachment she was supposed to maintain. “Frank, they were your friends. You shouldn’t have to do this,” she said gently, the words an echo of the sympathy she rarely voiced.

For a long moment, Frank said nothing. He stood there, staring down at the bodies as though willing them to wake up, to tell him this was all some terrible mistake. But the silence stretched on, heavy and absolute. He swallowed hard, his head bowing under the weight of grief. "Confirm it, Erica," he said, his voice raw, barely above a whisper. "Just... confirm their deaths."

Kneeling beside the male body, Erica’s gloved fingers hovered over his cold neck, hesitating for just a moment before making contact. The chill of his skin seeped through the latex. In that brief touch, she felt it—an abrupt severing of life, a vibrant force reduced to something distant and hollow. It was as if the magic that had once radiated from him had been snuffed out, leaving only a ghost of what had once been.

Irreversible.

Erica Sanders had worked as an investigator and mortician for the Ministry of Magic for six years—long enough to become accustomed to the unnerving quiet of the dead, but never long enough to grow numb to the tragedy of it. Since her days at Hogwarts, where she’d studied with some of these very people, she had seen more bodies than she could count, most victims of the Unforgivable Curses. The faces of the fallen blurred together in her mind, a haunting gallery of lives destroyed by the relentless darkness festering in their world. It was a darkness that seemed to grow with every year, every life lost to it.

"James Potter," she breathed out, the name catching in her throat as if saying it aloud made it more real. Her heart clenched, a deep ache spreading through her chest as she watched Frank's shoulders tremble with grief. His back was turned to her, but she could feel the weight of his sorrow, heavy in the air between them. Erica blinked rapidly, forcing herself to stay composed. She had to remain professional, even now. Especially now. For Frank.

"Dead," she confirmed softly, her voice barely more than a whisper, though the word seemed to echo through the room, final and unforgiving.

James's head rested close to his wife’s, their hair mingling in a tragic twist—his dark, wild locks intertwined with Lily’s fiery red. It was as if, even in death, they could not be separated. Erica’s gaze shifted to Lily, her breath catching in her throat as she took in the deep gash on Lily’s forehead, where she had struck her head when she fell. Blood had dried along the wound, a stark contrast to her pale skin.

Erica’s hand trembled as she reached out to check for a pulse on Lily’s still form, though she knew in her heart what she would find—or wouldn’t find. Her fingers brushed against the delicate skin of Lily’s wrist, and a profound sense of loss washed over her. There was nothing. No heartbeat. No magic. Just silence.

"Lily Potter," she whispered, the words thick with sorrow. As they left her lips, she saw Frank's resolve crumble entirely. He buried his face in his hands, his grief now a physical thing, raw and uncontainable. His shoulders shook with silent sobs, and Erica wished desperately that there was something she could say to ease his pain, but no words could undo the horror of what they had found.

"Dead," she repeated, though this time the word felt heavier, as if it carried with it the weight of their entire world crashing down.

Erica remained kneeling, her hands still resting on the bodies of the Potters.

“They were good people,” Frank said, his voice rough with sorrow, breaking the silence as Erica gently brushed Lily’s hair from her blood-streaked face. “James... he was always so full of life. He'd crack jokes even when everything was falling apart. He had this way of making you believe that everything would be okay, no matter how bad it got. And Lily... she had the biggest heart. She loved so deeply, cared so much... she didn’t deserve this.”

Erica stood, moving toward Frank to offer comfort, wishing Alice were there. She knew Frank's wife had been close to the Potters, and had known them well. Erica remembered the Longbottoms had a son the same age as the baby cradled feet away in the arms of a giant man named Hagrid. Perhaps the families had shared playdates.

Frank’s gaze lingered on James and Lily’s lifeless bodies. “They fought so hard... did everything they could to protect everyone. And now... their son, Harry...” Frank’s voice cracked, a fresh wave of anguish overwhelming him. “He’s just a baby. His parents are gone... and he’s all alone.” Frank turned away, fists clenched, fury mingling with his sorrow. "How could this happen? How could they be careless enough not to have their wands ready? James could’ve held his own in a duel. And Lily... she could’ve Apparated with the baby." His voice wavered, eyes burning with a mix of anger and heartbreak. “They gave everything. And now... now...” His shoulders sagged under the weight of the loss. "They were the best of us... and now they’re gone."

Erica felt the depth of Frank's grief. She understood the pain of losing people you loved. But as she stood in the Potter household, surrounded by the aftermath of yet another senseless tragedy, it wasn’t the two lifeless bodies in front of her that unsettled her the most.

No, it was the third body—the one hidden away upstairs, the one Frank had warned her to examine last. The name on everyone’s mind, yet too cautious to speak aloud.

"Should we call the Minister of Magic?" Erica asked softly, her voice barely breaking the oppressive silence as she glanced at Frank.

Frank’s jaw tightened, his gaze hard and resolute. "We tell no one," he replied, his tone firm, almost chilling. "Not until you’ve confirmed it’s him."

A wave of nausea rose in Erica’s stomach. Facing death was one thing—but the possibility that it was his body, that he might be dead, brought an entirely different fear. It could mean this nightmare was finally over... or, far worse, that it had only just begun.

Suddenly, the oppressive silence of the room was broken by the soft pop of Apparition. Erica turned toward the doorway just as her friend, Alannah, appeared. The color drained from Alannah’s face the moment she saw the two lifeless twenty-one-year-olds sprawled on the floor. Her breath caught in her throat as recognition hit her like a blow.

Her enchanted quill, hovering beside her, scratched noiselessly on parchment, capturing every detail of the scene. But for once, Alannah, the relentless reporter, had no questions. Her mouth remained firmly shut, the weight of what she saw rendering her speechless.

"Oh... it’s the Potters," she whispered, her wide blue eyes flickering with shock. "I went to school with them. They were only three years behind me."

“Alannah,” Erica said, her tone sharp with exasperation. “Who told you to come here?”

“Old Bathilda’s been talking up the whole town,” Alannah replied, regaining some composure. "Rumors are spreading like wildfire. They’re saying the Minister of Magic and the head of the Auror department are on their way."

Erica’s stomach twisted. "Oh no," she muttered, paling. "We haven’t even finished the initial investigation."

Alannah gave a small, apologetic shrug. "Sorry, Erica. News like this travels fast... Such a shame about the Potters, though."

Frank, who had been silently grieving, clenched his fists tighter, his voice thick with emotion as he spoke. “He never let down his guard normally,” he said, his eyes locked on James’s lifeless form. “I can’t believe they didn’t have their wands. What on earth could have convinced them that they were safe?”

“Was he after them?” Erica asked Frank, who often knew more than the average Auror.

Frank shook his head, either unwilling to answer or not knowing the truth of what happened. The Potter’s had been young, so to be on the radar of such a dark wizard had to mean something. Frank leaned against the wall and looked like he was going to throw up, with one hand clenched on his abdomen.

Alannah shifted uneasily, her trembling voice breaking the tension as she asked the question that had been hanging over them all. “Is it true? What people are saying about... Voldemort?”

Frank shifted uncomfortably near Erica, his gaze fixated on the staircase, where faint signs of a struggle told a story only he could fully piece together. He had been one of the first on the scene and had witnessed everything—the path Lily Potter had taken as she raced toward the nursery in a desperate attempt to save her son. The weight of that memory clung to him like a shadow, and Erica could sense how heavily it sat on his mind.

“I’d best be goin,” came the deep, sorrow-filled voice of the Hogwarts gamekeeper, Rubeus Hagrid. He stood near them, cradling the infant in his massive arms. “Sirius Black gave me his motorbike t’ get the child t’ where he needs t’ be safe.”

Erica hadn’t known Hagrid well, but the sight of him now—broken with grief, holding Harry Potter as if he were his own flesh and blood—stirred something in her. Silent tears streaked down his face and molded into his beard. The only sound that pierced the oppressive quiet of the room was the soft, muffled cries of the baby, pressed against Hagrid’s chest, oblivious to the tragedy that had destroyed his family.

“Thanks, Hagrid,” Frank said, his voice thick but steady as he waved a hand at the giant man. “Give my best to Dumbledore.”

Erica, Frank, and Alannah stood in silence, watching as Hagrid carefully carried the child through the debris. Half the house had been obliterated—walls reduced to rubble, furniture shattered, a battlefield even though it seemed Voldemort had been the only one casting spells. Frank had found Lily and James’s wands upstairs in their bedroom when he first arrived. That meant whatever had happened to them was either the result of wandless magic or the deadly work of the man no one wanted to think about.

"Longbottom?" Alannah’s voice trembled as she broke the silence, her question barely above a whisper. She needed an answer—needed to make sense of the horror unfolding around them, just as they all did.

Frank exhaled, the sound hollow in the suffocating stillness of the room. His gaze never wavered from the staircase, as though he already knew what awaited them at the top. "We don’t know yet," he replied, his voice heavy with the weight of uncertainty. "But Erica… she’ll find out soon enough."

Dread crept into Erica’s bones like an unshakable fog, thick and relentless. Whatever waited upstairs would change everything—confirm or deny a fate too terrifying to utter. If the body up there was really his—the Dark Lord himself—then this nightmare could finally be over. But if it wasn’t...

Erica steeled herself, her stomach knotting as she took a step forward, carefully stepping over the bodies of James and Lily Potter. Her gaze locked on the staircase, stretching ahead of her like a shadowed path to a terrible revelation. She could almost hear it in her mind—Lily Potter’s frantic footsteps pounding up those very stairs, her only thought to reach the nursery. Even as death closed in, she hadn’t run to save herself.

She had run to save her son.

The scene played in Erica’s mind as she ascended, her footfalls silent against the wooden steps. Lily had been found upstairs, her body still warm, the faintest whisper of breath left in her lungs as if she had held on—held on long enough to ensure her baby was safe. Erica could almost feel the woman’s lingering presence, the fierce love that had kept her alive, even for a few precious seconds more.

As Erica reached the top of the staircase and crossed the threshold into the nursery, the sight before her was chilling. Furniture had been hastily piled against the door, a last-ditch effort to block the inevitable. Lily Potter had no wand. Neither had her husband. They had faced the end unarmed but defiant, driven by something far stronger than magic—an unyielding determination to protect their son.

And now, just beyond the scattered toys and the overturned crib, lay the figure that filled Erica with a dread deeper than she had ever known. It was the body she had been avoiding, the one she feared to examine—the one that could change everything.

Please be dead.

Her breath hitched as she took a hesitant step forward, the weight of what she was about to confirm pressing down on her like an invisible hand. Behind her, she heard Frank, who had likely come to back her up in case the man was not dead. The room, once a place of warmth and love, now felt suffocating, each breath harder than the last. Her heartbeat quickened, pounding in her ears as her gaze finally settled on the body lying crumpled on the floor.

One sharp gasp escaped her lips, and her knees almost gave way. Her hand shot out, gripping the wall for support as recognition hit her like a wave of ice. She knew that face, that grotesque visage—had seen it once before, years ago, when she was just a girl because of her stupid pureblood brother. It was unmistakable, etched into her memory like a nightmare that refused to fade. The slits for a nose, the unnaturally pale, almost waxen skin, and those long, bony fingers—fingers that once held unimaginable power, now limp and lifeless.

It was him.

The dark wizard who had terrorized the world, whose name was still spoken only in whispers. And now, here he was, lying in a heap on the nursery floor, as still as the dead. She stared at his form, waiting—hoping—for any sign of life, any subtle twitch of movement that would confirm her worst fears. But there was nothing. No rise or fall of his chest. No flicker of those terrible eyes. He was dead.

She hoped.

Her legs trembled as she moved closer, the chill of the room intensifying as she approached his body. She knelt beside him, her fingers shaking as she reached out, stopping just short of his skin. The air around him felt wrong, almost heavy with the residue of dark magic, and Erica hesitated, afraid to make contact.

Could it really be over?

Her mind raced as she knelt there, staring at the fallen Dark Lord. Erica’s fingers hovered just above his cold, pale skin. One touch would tell her the truth. One touch could confirm whether this was truly the end, or if something far darker was waiting to be unleashed.

She closed her eyes for a moment, steadying her breath. Then, summoning all the courage she had, she pressed her hand to Voldemort’s chest. His skin was ice beneath her touch, and she felt no pulse, no heartbeat. Nothing. He was as dead as any other body she had examined in her years at the Ministry. She pulled her hand away slowly, her heart still racing, the weight of what she had just done sinking in.

“Is it really over?” Frank whispered behind her, disbelief in his voice.

Erica stood in silence, her chest rising and falling in shallow breaths as she cast one final, lingering glance at the lifeless form of the Dark Lord. His twisted figure lay crumpled at her feet, the menace that had once filled the air now dissipating into an eerie stillness. She forced herself to tear her gaze away and turned toward the door where Frank stood. Her limbs felt heavy, as if weighed down by the enormity of what had just transpired.

Faint cries echoed from the room behind her, the fragile wails of a baby who should not have been left alive. The sound tugged at her heart, but before she could process it, the distant roar of a motorbike filled the air, growing louder and louder until it drowned out the infant's cries completely. Erica paused, her senses reeling, and turned back to the nursery. Her breath caught in her throat.

Through the massive, jagged hole in the nursery wall, she glimpsed a figure—Hagrid, unmistakably—soaring into the night on an enormous, enchanted motorbike. His massive arms cradled the tiny form of the baby in question, the one who had somehow survived. A baby who should have been dead, but instead, was being carried off into the sky.

Erica's mind raced, unable to comprehend what her eyes were telling her. No one could survive the killing curse— no one —and certainly not a mere infant. Yet, there he was, the child untouched by death’s hand. She stumbled backward, her legs giving way as disbelief surged through her body. Her fingers grasped the doorframe, seeking something solid to hold onto, anything to ground her in the reality that felt increasingly surreal.

The truth hit her all at once, a wave of shock that chilled her to the core: Harry Potter . The name echoed in her mind, but now it carried new weight, a new meaning. The boy who had survived the Dark Lord’s wrath. The boy who had lived when he should have perished.

Erica’s heart pounded in her chest as she stared out into the night, the motorbike disappearing into the distance. The world had changed in an instant, and nothing would ever be the same again. Harry Potter—the boy who lived—had defied the impossible.

“How did he do it?” She whispered to herself, more than to Frank, “How did it end?”

#petals talks #james potter #lily evans #jily fic #Haloween 19

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the-pale-chancellor · 4 months ago

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So, we finished Curse of Strahd

After about 9 months we did it. I'd say even on accident, because one session before we were too stubborn to comply and obey Strahd and started a fight. We didn't expect to finish it all in one session, but here we are and...I'm just so grateful to our amazing Master, who's sadly not on Tumblr, for what story he's given us. And generally for what way we have walked from the very first session, unsure and quiet, till the very end, emotional and beautiful as it is. /breathes in/ So, you probably want to know what happened to our characters? And even if you don't, I'll still tell you this hehe. Saer'llith, my silly little boy, who's no longer just a phylactery for a Lich, who's no longer bearing the Dyrr surname, is learning to live a new life. Without memories of his past self, without an ability to walk under the sun because he has no soul left, but with a person who loves him unconditionally, who made it through along with him - with Escher Belasco. They both are now looking after the Orphanage and the children, inculding Victor (whenever he's not doing something dangerous with his magic again) and trying to learn what it's like - to live freely. Maxine has reached the end but her time was ticking - a deal with Zhudun and one death later broke her own soul into pieces, therefore the only thing left was to finally lay to rest in peace in a tomb, along with her wife - Erin, so they together become nothingness. Their draconic "son", Mark, became a stone guardian statue, protecting their eternal sleep. They've finally reunited. Sharlotka has found who she was seeking for - one of the hags of these lands, who was forever bound to her lover - a vampire named Gulthias, who is just now a tree, free to grow under the sunlight and give wine apples that are able to sate vampires' hunger for blood (and thus becoming a way out for Escher). But she has broken her own morals and her own self - a grave domain cleric who had to raise a person from the dead, who buried her friends along the way and who now walks a path different from her own god. She still has a lot of work to do in Barovia. Deva, or Virgo now partially has her fate in the hands of the deity, but that doesn't mean that her story has ended. Even under such control she's free to roam wherever she wants to and to finally forget about the constant dungeons she's been all her life in. Barovia has let her out even if most of her new friends stayed in there - and she'll use every possibility of that. And the character who's been the least with us - Isil [ee-s-ee-l'] - has wandered back to where she first appeared - to the Amber Temple to find the knowledge, the truth she's been seeking. Our Master said that she'll have her own little story later and we're so waiting for this. The player's other chacracter - Gabriel - has also died but she's forever our favourite for the silly songs and just for who she was. Well...I think, that's it? I still can't really believe that we've finished it all. Of course, months later we'll start something new but for now - this fandom will have a storng grip on us all for times to come. And I'm just glad that this fandom exists. And for all the coincidences that has happened along the way, for who we've met and for who we've become. Thank you, @qusok, @vadimtea and @she-who-must-not-be-woken. I'm grateful to play with you all. And just know that I love you :)

#curse of strahd #dnd #dnd campaign #cos #saer'llith dyrr #or should I call him Saer'llith Belasco now..#maxine lynch #erin nailo #sharlotka #virgo #isil galanodel #escher belasco #victor vallakovich #zhudun #yeah i am mentioning everyone #roll the credits

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wolfdrawer · 6 months ago

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OK, have something for Torbek and Twig!! Allow me to ramble and then after all this, time for some drawings!!

Side note: There is still magic in this au, however i made it so it's very selective so yes, Twig is still a brownie, however she's not warlock. I would say more, the classes are not specific. So it's more soft magic system.

Torbek:

•Once a mayor of a town, racked with so much paranoia of the hobgoblins appearing and ruining his reputation, he goes off the deep end, taxing his citizens to the point of bankruptcy, fueling his own needs of drinking away the paranoia, and desperately finding out who he can trust. He went off the deep end, drinking and blacking out, becoming more and more paranoid to the point of accusing innocents of betrayal and sabotage, locking them away and violently (not torture more mad yelling and ramblings) hassling them to why they are betraying this town. One day, the towns people had enough and rioted, breaking into the mayor's office, stealing back their wealth and rescuing their family and friends. Backed into a corner, the mayor fled out of his window, grabbing his booze and going anywhere but his home. A shell of his former self, with only alcohol to comfort him and the hazy memories of where he came from.

•In this, he did have a wife but he scared her so badly, can't stand seeing him in such distress and violence, that she had to leave him and run away, leaving behind only the scarf she made for him. Yes, her name is Clementine and she is a moth lady because of a theory I have for Torbek's life in the regular Witchlight.

•He has no weapons per se and in this, he doesn't have witchlight powers or blood curses so his only defense is his feral growing nails and his alcohol bottles.

•He wears messy typical mayor clothing that is stained and ripped in too many ways. Typical hobo look but more put together. He's just traveling around being a menace...in the nicest way possible.

Twig:

•Bar maid that wishes for more in life while working long hours at the (Tavern Name pending). With her pet pig, they save their money to get out of the town they live in.

•Twig is her same chipper war crime self, but more restricted because she doesn't have many options. I would have to look up Brownie powers and other fae magic to fully explain.

•Pigtunia is no longer a familiar but she is a pet that is loyal and kind of follows Twig around when ready.

•Her weapons of choice are a work in progress because I want her to have some kind of hard hitting weapon, looking up blunt weapons now because Twig with a gun is hilarious, but also Twig just hitting people like their baseballs is also really funny...she can get one gun, as a treat and it'll be brutal.

•Her outfit when the boys first meet her is typical bar maid outfit, like you'd see in a tavern, not those kinds though. Her outfit change when she officially joins the crew, is a red cowboy hat that she sews mushroom spots into, because I want that motif, and the woman cowboy outfit, hard to explain again but the colors are from her dress in Witchlight.

And that's all for now!! Next up is drawings and I want to put in so much detail but at the same time, I don't know how much will actually be described...Please enjoy!!

#legends of avantris #once upon a witchlight #torbek #twig #kremy lecroux #gideon coal #morning frost #gricko grimgrin #hootsie grimgrin #cowboy au #Woohoo!#now for the drawing process

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icharchivist · 8 months ago

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So this whole event is all about grief?

Always Has Been.

jk jk, i think this event is about many things, one of which being grief. but take my own analysis of it with caution, as it is mostly how i felt it, and huh, i'm someone who's very deeply sensitive about grief. Everything is about grief when it's all you know yaknow?

But, yeah, i think it's one major element of this event. I think the King put it best near the end: grief is something every mortal go through, and all they can hope out of it is letting it get you to be closer with others people. Staying stuck in the past is only going to hurt the longer you stay there, in denial, holding to something that's long gone.

We're talking about Rebirth and Destruction, and i think one key element is that... when you get destroyed people will mourn you, if you are willed to life again, people have grieved for you.

It's grief that pushes Raziel to try to find any alternative to bring Lucifer back, grief who makes her think killing the singularity is worth it if it can keep the Phoenix alive. Without knowing the Phoenix was manipulating her, it was her selfish wish of holding on to Lucifer, someone who was long gone, that risked going against what she thought was Phoenix's wishes, and after MC's life.

It's also grief that pushes Sandalphon to stop her, for he has been coping with his own grief for years. Just like the Diviners, he mourns. Lucifer was all his life once. He had to learn to let him go in order to experience more to life. Yet still he yearns for him, but he can't let it move him on a path he doesn't want to walk. It's because he is honoring Lucifer's wishes that he restrains himself from his selfish desire, but also the life he found in this world worth loving.

And it's also grief that pushes Magus to look for any way to bring Astaroth back. She clung to his remains in the Pandemonium trying to bring him back to life, she took his identity for a while as well, she clung to his remains even while dying at the bottom of the skies. And still she thought of going with the Phoenix's plan if only it meant she could find a way to bring Astaroth back.

It's grief that motivated all of Abramelin's arc. It's grieving the loss of his wife and his child that made him make a pact with Phoenix against God. He didn't even care for the cause. He just was grieving. Phoenix manipulated Farhana into accepting death so Abramelin would be driven by grief. And in succumbing to this anger that followed her death, Abramelin was stuck in an eternity of torment. He kept forgetting her, and dooming himself for forgetting his precious family. All he had was Fenie coming back once in a while telling him to hang on on life, but all he wanted was death.

In a sense Abramelin is stuck in the anger phase of grief. He only has rage keeping him forward. Rage against the Phoenix that gave him this cursed life, rage for the God who killed his wife, rage for all of those who can't give him peace. Something also i think is important on that reading is that his memory loss means he can never actually process what he's done, how he coped. Every day he forgets what are the reasons he still keeps going. He's a man walking longing for death, forgetting the people he once loved, and therefore unable to properly process the grief he lived and instead dooming himself for forgetting what was important to him, leading him once again to want to end his life.

Fenie meanwhile was grieving both of her parents, and she turned it into a flame of hope in the darkness. She clung to the promise Phoenix made her and her mother. But everything was shortlived in the end.

Farhana knew the power of grief and let the Phoenix use her for it. And as Sabrina, the past came crashing down and while learning about Abramelin fucked her up, it's losing Fenie that eventually broke her and had her accept her past. Where Abramelin lost his mind, Sabrina found hers eventually. But it still was taken away.

Abramelin accepted death for his child to live. He had accepted death a long time ago and now at leas he knew he was dying for the people he loved, rather than just dying because he couldn't stand it anymore. Sabrina and Fenie will have to move forward from that.

And the Diviners mourn him because he was a companion for hundred of years. The Diviners are people who keep fighting to keep their purpose alive, because it's the only way for them to be alive. Yet being alive comes with the fact that you will experience loss. Abramelin was a constant in their lives, without being one of theirs. They spent the event with the fear of dying, only to mourn once the person they tried to kill all those hundred years ended up finally kicking the bucket -- because you can't help but create bonds, for to live is to love.

Everyone else in that event were dealing with a type of grief, of mourning, they coped in any way they thought possible. They have Eternity to remember, some are doomed to forget, yet you live on with the pain of people you lost.

Every single one of the people focused on in term of grief were immortals, or in Sabrina's case, a reincarnation. They're people who have all the time in the world behind them, and accumulated loss they still have to process into that day.

Which bring me to Ceodric, ultimately the secondary antagonist of the story. Ceodric grieved his mother. We know the Phoenix came to find him while he was still crying her on her death bed. We also know that no matter the reasons Phoenix gave him, whatever the reasons Ceodric fought for, what he hoped in the end was to have the tear of the Phoenix to bring her back. Everything he did, was out of grief. And grief makes you vulnerable. Phoenix took advantage of that, the way she took advantage of Farhana and Abramelin in the past. She never intended for Ceodric to have a happy ending, neither would Farhana and Abramelin once they met again. Phoenix doesn't care about love expect in the way it can help her manipulate others.

Ceodric was consumed by his grief so much he couldn't take it. He tried to find any reason outside of his control to justify the death, because just accepting it as a tragedy wouldn't just work.

Phoenix meanwhile is a creature who cannot comprehend grief. She says she doesn't understand love, she says that for her a thousand years mean nothing, so the reincarnation cycle of a few thousand years means nothing to her either. She's a creature who is so used to living and dying and living again that dying doesn't mean a thing to her.

Honestly i would wonder if it's why the Phoenix seeks the Omnipotent so much. The Omnipotent is Rebirth and Destruction, and the only thing that can kill immortal people. She clung to a piece of him for all that time. I think maybe, it's the only way to actually test her own existence, because life means nothing to her, as it always restarts either way.

but Phoenix uses people. She does so the whole event. She uses the fear the Diviners have to die to infiltrate them and create conflict. She uses the fact Raziel cares for her and is grieving for Lucifer to use her. She tries to use the fact Magus wants Astaroth back to manipulate her, to no aim. She manipulated Farhana into accepting death to manipulate Abramelin later. She manipulated Fenie in accepting her deal despite knowing Fenie will barely survive with her parents. And she manipulated Ceodric who wanted his mother back. And while Ceodric was manipulated because of the love he had for his mother, it's a mother grieving her child who ended up striking him down.

Ceodric was a piece of shit and the way he just accepted how to hurt Sabrina fucking sucked and everything. But i don't want to give in completely to the hatred because ultimately he's just one more person who's grief was used against him by the Phoenix. It's just that every single other players of this mascarade had either purer motives or a stronger heart to move ahead. Ceodric is the cautionary tale of mismanaged grief turning you into a weapon. None of the stories about grief would have hit the same if not for the one person who couldn't stand grieving.

I would also mention that some of the supporting cast also, are interesting choices on that matter. Ladiva is defined by her grieving her parents so much she wants to give the world the love her parents gave her tenthfold. She is so loving because she misses her parents dearly and will do anything so that people don't feel the pain that she's carrying. That's something she also expresses in No Rain No Rainbow, which was among the events being pictured during MC's power surge. Cagliostro, also, has a lot to do with grieving. She grieves her older sister who took care of her when she was so sick everyone else had abandonned her. The sister she loved so much she took inspiration from when she created the appearance she now lives by. And so she brings her own collection of bodies into the battle in order to help MC carry the power of the Omnipotents: representations of the person Cagliostro is missing the most. Not to mention Shalem, even if the event didn't focus on her as much, who is someone defined by how she's grieving people she doesn't even remember.

(Anon who wants Seofon to be a big brother to dead siblings, this is your cue to start crying).

and it's not to count the metaphorical aspect of grief, such as grieving a life you couldn't have had. I would argue MC is grieving their father, in that sense, and isn't abandoning hope to see them again. Because like... this is someone who abandoned them decades ago to go to a mystical land. Abandon mixes together with grief when thinking about why the people you love couldn't have stayed with you. in No Rain No Rainbow, Ladiva actually compares MC missing their father to how she's missing her parents, but how she cannot comprehend our Father's decisions because her parents loved her so much she can't process a parent willing to do that. And to her who misses her parents, she can't fathom how MC must be processing this specific type of grief.

I think grief is the natural thing that comes up if you're talking about the very core of what makes the Skyrealm: it's a place of mortality, one where we die, one where we grief. One where we have to move on, in some way. The primal beasts we meet all get closer to the humanity of the skyrealm as they discover people they care about, and that they care about enough that it would hurt to lose them.

in 000, when Belial spites that loving skydwellers is a pointless thing to do because they'll die one day and everyone else will forget your name, it's ultimately a call of refusing to experience grief in some way or another, made even more tangible by the fact we know Belial grieved Lucilius for so many thousand of years. He exprienced loss and he can't experience it again, and the skyrealm which is a place where loss have to be accepted to move on is something he doesn't want to partake in.

So, yes, actually, i do think this event is a lot about grief. but also it's about hope. It's about moving forward. Raising from one's ashes, literally. It's accepting death, but it's also challenging it. It's living on.

but what i believe is that with Ceodric, there's this type of cautionary tale about denial, about trying to find any explanation, any scapegoat, to refuse to acknowledge your own pain.

There's also some commentary with Ceodric about radicalization, for instance. His belief on power falls a lot into the mindset a lot of fascist fall into when figuring out what they have to consider as scapegoat even if they have to be hypocritical about it, and the way it's usually by preying on vulnerable people that people fall into this type of cult.

There's still commentary about the primals about free will, and about their lack of with the Diviners as well. Whenever they can continue forward or not.

There's obviously a discussion about Power, which, while driven by an unreliable Ceodric, raises questions for Seofon in particular, because while Ceodric is an hypocrite, the fact people who hold powers are the one deciding of the fate of the world is something Seofon has to consider both as the leader of the most powerful crew in the sky, and as someone who currently has a parasite at the back of his head who is waiting for the time he can take over and use the very same power Seofon is wielding to protect the skies in order to do God knows what. Just because Ceodric is wrong on his reasoning doesn't mean there isn't some forshadowing there, is all i mean.

And of course in Granblue's fashion, it's still about love. It's about companionship. It's about how you need everyone to work together to achieve a power that is just the same as Godhood. The dragons taking on the Phoenix individually knocked them out, but working together with the Skyrealms meant they could actually even the odds. Always something our cosmical besties have to learn.

And honestly i think it's a perfect way to celebrate the 10th anni. They talked about how the 10th year will be a marking point for Granblue because many things are ending and many others will be begining. I think the tease about the Moon, about reaching Estalucia, are all about that. We're closing the book on the stories that we followed for 10 years, we're reaching an end there -- but there are now new things to explore. We'll move on, but we're looking back on what we have had so far with fondness.

We're human so we grieve, and so we move on.

but what do i know. I'm just obsessed with grief as it is. maybe i'm just projecting a lot on everything.

So yeah that's kinda my take for now on the event, all fresh from it. Maybe it'll change when i spend more time thinking about it and when my brain will be less fried from a long day.

But what can i say. love me some story about grief.

have a nice day and thank you for reading

#ichareply #anonymous #ichafantalks gbf #ichablogging gbf #ichablogging 10thanni

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rjthirsty · 1 month ago

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To Protect My Love

Gilbert/Dahlia (OC) Dahlia/Roderic

Words: 4.7k

Tags: Spoilers! Gilbert Main Route Spoilers! No Smut. Spoilers right off the bat.

Gilbert waited impatiently in his room, confined to his bed once again, drudging up unpleasant memories of his childhood. He had always been a sickly child, and grew into a sickly adult, his life expectancy cut shorter and shorter the more he pushed his body past what it was reliably capable of. Something he was okay with happening. It was his goal, after all, to remove the ruling class, to cleanse this world of the corrupt which came from having power.

But then she asked him to live.

Dahlia, the little rabbit that had captured his attention years before, a traveling book salesman - a friend from his childhood - had told him stories of a good-natured young girl, who grew into a virtuous young woman. And he had grown interested in what sort of world she could create if she had been in his place instead of him. What would have happened if she stayed pure and continued to love people rather than turn to violence and bloodshed like he had?

He was still writing that story. He was still watching her and seeing if she could truly change the world with her good heart. Somewhere along the way, he fell in love, despite knowing he had weeks left to live. And surprisingly, somewhere along the way she also fell in love. Now Gilbert was watching her with Dahlia at his side.

He whisked her away to Obsidian, and gave her the opportunity to put her bid for peace into practice. Along with that plan, she begged him to live. He wouldn’t know if she could make the world a better place without seeing it himself, she had said. So he did what he had been refusing - he went through with an experimental surgery to help his imperfect heart. Walter, his physician, wasn’t even certain if the surgery would be a success, but he was sitting in bed now, recovering, and it seemed his life might just continue on a little longer.

Was it a blessing, or a curse, he wondered.

Gilbert truly loved the little rabbit.

He hadn’t expected things to turn out this way. There was a plan in place since he was a young boy, one he put into motion himself. He had once heard about a noblewoman replacing her sick child with a boy who looked the same as him, and he thought it was a brilliant idea in order to keep his mother and older brother, Albert, from being sad about his passing. So he had found a boy who looked nearly identical to him, and trained him to be so much like him that no one could tell. That was the day he started wearing the eyepatch, to cover one of the few inconsistencies the two of them had.

It worked so well that at this moment he was out there handling matters the Supreme Emperor of Obsidian would be handling. Matters Gilbert would normally be handling if he was not recovering from life saving surgery.

Dahlia knew– of course she would know. She saw through most people, and it seems she saw through Roderic even without knowing the secret he had under his eyepatch. Since then, Gilbert had revealed his heterochromatic eye to her, but like his illness, only Walter and Roderic had known about this defect of his before she was included. Yet she had known from the moment Roderic had portrayed himself as Gilbert that it wasn’t really Gilbert, and that was fascinating to him.

It did, however, bring with it some additional complications. Mainly that she was now his wife in name, titling herself as the Empress of Obsidian, and because she knew that Roderic was an imposter posing as the Emperor, she tended to portray a cold and distant relationship between the two of them– between public Gilbert, and his wife, Dahlia. It was a problem. They couldn’t act like strangers - as much as he loathed to consider that another man would put hands on his lover, Roderic was an extension of him, and appearances should be kept.

What would happen if someone tried to step in while he was confined to his room? Roderic would kill without hesitation, that was certain. But to think anyone would consider him weak enough that someone could claim his little rabbit made his bloodlust malleable. It would flare unintentionally when his thoughts wandered, and according to Walter, it was one of the reasons his healing was taking time.

Just like the two of them were taking their time answering his summons, Gilbert thought to himself. He’d have to add this to the punishment he was already concocting for Dahlia. She hadn’t yet taken part in what she was going to be punished for later, but she would. His wishes were absolute - she knew that, and she accepted it.

Roderic was the first to enter Gilbert’s room. It was a strange feeling to see yourself across the room, but if Gilbert had to put a name to the feeling, it would probably border on delight. Roderic was impeccable in his faux persona, and Gilbert was sure he would easily fool anyone– anyone but Dahlia and Chevalier, it seemed. But that was to be expected. He was sure Roderic would easily pass in front of any of the other Rhodolite princes, and anyone in his own kingdom would accept him as well.

There was a moment that Gilbert wanted to be mischievous, to have Roderic take up his spot in bed and he could hide behind one of the many bookshelves throughout his room. He wanted to see how long it would take Dahlia to realize they’d changed places. Teasing his little rabbit was one of his favorite pastimes. But the moment passed as soon as Roderic kneeled before him, supplicating himself.

“...You called, my lord.” Roderic spoke in his own manner, not the way that Gilbert had taught him in order to replicate himself. He fell into this habit every time they exchanged words, even when wearing Gilbert’s clothes and looking the part.

“We’re waiting on our wife.”

The way Gilbert had said ‘our wife’ planted an uncomfortable seed in the back of Roderic’s mind. He was aware he was not Gilbert, despite currently portraying himself as the man. He was merely a stand in, a copy, there to keep up appearances until Gilbert could once again resume his reign as Emperor. And if Gilbert passed away, he was to continue to keep up appearances - but he knew he would never be a match for the man himself.

Roderic nodded and rose from his kneel. “We’re hearing reports of issues near the southern border. The open trade treaty has spurred several nobles into–”

“We’ll deal with the filth later. Something else is more pressing.” Gilbert interrupted. “Roderic, how do you feel about Dahlia?”

Gilbert’s dark red eye was steady on Roderic, and Roderic could feel the malice emanating off of Gilbert. He had been in the presence of Gilbert’s bloodlust more times than he could count, and knew by now how to manage against it. Though he couldn’t repeat the same paralyzing aura, Gilbert had trained him with it so he wouldn’t falter even against Gilbert himself.

“...The little rabbit is extremely taken with you.”

“Roderic, that is not what I asked.” Gilbert’s displeasure was clear on his face - he wasn’t even wearing his signature smile.

“I…” Roderic was slow with his words as he searched inside himself for his own answer to this question. How did he feel about Dahlia? He hadn’t explored his own feelings into the matter because it didn’t matter how he felt. If she was Gil’s wife, he would treat her with the respect and care she deserved. Anyone precious to Gilbert was precious to him. “I think she is unique.”

“Unique?” Gilbert pressed.

“...Yes. She is unlike anyone I’ve ever met. And she has a way of seeing right to the heart of someone. I experienced it in Rhodolite– she knew almost immediately that I wasn’t you.”

“You admire her.” Gilbert gave a facial shrug as he turned the thought over. “That could work.”

A knock at the door had both men turning their attention to it as Dahlia announced herself and entered. No one bothered Gilbert in his room. Roderic or Walter were the only two who were allowed entrance - and now Dahlia, but the other two didn’t knock politely. Despite Gil’s request for Dahlia to also come and go as she pleased - she was his lover after all - she continued to announce her presence.

The oozing animosity in the air dissipated immediately. Gilbert really was a different man when it came to her. Roderic stole a glance at Gilbert, who seemed to perk up as soon as Dahlia came into the room. It reminded him of the child Gil used to be before everything he loved was taken from him. Roderic had lived through that as well, having already been at Gilbert’s side for several years by that point.

Dahlia’s eyes moved from Gilbert in bed to Gilbert standing by the bed - the two men looked identical. It was surprising each time she saw them together, knowing that they weren’t related at all yet they could pass for twins. Of course, that was the point of it all - she knew that now. She had been filled in on Roderic’s role in Gil’s life not long after finding out about his illness, a secret she shared with only three others - Walter, Roderic, and Gilbert.

Standing Gilbert glanced at Gilbert in bed and Dahlia knew instantly that the real man she loved was not toying with her today, and was taking his rest seriously. She smiled and moved across the room to greet Gilbert, taking a seat on the side of the large bed and pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek.

“Aww, that’s it? You haven’t seen me all day, and all I get is a peck on the cheek?” Gilbert tilted his head in a manner that made him look boyishly charming, his smile devious and unbelievably handsome.

Dahlia knew this game by now, and she gladly played along. She had a feeling he did it for her, gently pushing her to be more receptive to the constant affection he lavished her with, and requesting more from her without demanding it.

“It’s good to see you, Gil. I missed you.” She placed a hand on his cheek, her body temperature much higher than his. His cheek wasn’t as cold as it had been before the surgery, and while she didn’t understand everything dealing with the medical procedure, she knew his warmth meant he was alive and he had a future with her.

“Is that all the love you have for me?” Gilbert leaned into Dahlia’s hand, his one red eye never breaking from her gaze.

She glanced down at his lips, pulled into a smile so gentle that it made her heart ache. Slowly, she leaned in and brushed her lips against his, delicately ghosting a kiss. When she pulled back to look at him again, she stopped only inches away, just enough to be able to see eye to eye with him.

“No more than that.” She whispered, aware that Roderic was standing within arm’s reach of the both of them.

While Gilbert didn’t seem to mind an audience, Dahlia wasn’t used to displaying physical intimacy with anyone else who could see her. It had been a shock with the way Gil had hugged and hung on her the day after he brought her to Obsidian, unconcerned about who might witness their closeness. They weren’t even lovers at the time. They weren’t anything at that point. Yet he treated her like they had been long time friends, and more than that on occasion.

Gilbert slowly blinked, and the warmth that radiated from him disappeared. He continued to smile, but the smile had changed from being genuine to his practiced, unreadable mask. The way he straightened away from leaning into Dahlia’s touch was more felt by her than seen, and yet she understood the distance he was putting between them. She watched him, studying his face for an answer and unable to come up with one, knowing something had changed drastically in the last few seconds. It wasn’t like him to pull away from her, even when she set her boundaries. He respected her wishes– more than that, he seemed to do everything in his power to make them a reality, and never had she been punished for wanting to keep their intimacy between the two of them.

“Gil?” Dahlia asked as she brushed her thumb against his cheek.

Gilbert took her hand from his face and brought it towards his mouth where he sunk his teeth into her flesh, biting her roughly. Dahlia hissed through her teeth at the sudden pain, but just after she sucked in the breath, it floated back out of her in a soft sigh as Gilbert caressed the spot he had bit with his tongue, easing the pain into pleasure.

Biting was a sign of affection from Gilbert - or at least that’s what he claimed. He also claimed that he didn’t bite anyone besides Dahlia, and knowing how much he detested lies, Dahlia had to assume it was the truth. Still, it was another thing that she was getting used to, never having been the type to enjoy being hurt - but something about being the only one made it special and she was finding the love bites easier to deal with each time he set his teeth on her and marked her.

“Little rabbit, do you love me?” Gilbert questioned as he released Dahlia’s hand.

“Of course.” Dahlia blinked in confusion. “Why the sudden question? Have I given you the impression otherwise?”

“No,” Gilbert chuckled, his voice softening a little. “I’m aware of how your heart beats only for me. However…” The bed-ridden emperor looked past Dahlia to his mirrored image. “Roderic, you ask her the same.”

Dahlia and Roderic both went wide-eyed. Roderic shook his head and took a step back. “I can’t do that.”

Dahlia spun to look at Roderic, finding his face twisted in as much confusion as she was feeling. It was a look so unwholly like Gilbert that it made the entire situation seem even more unreal to her with Roderic dressed in Gilbert’s usual wear and being completely unlike the man she loved.

“You will.” Gilbert commanded in an even tone.

With eyebrows furrowed, she studied Gil, trying to understand what the point of this was. Suddenly, her heart lurched and her stomach dropped, the confusion gave way to fear so powerful that she instantly broke into a cold sweat. “Are you…” She whispered hoarsely, the words refusing to form in her tight and dry throat.

Gilbert met Dahlia’s gaze and continued to smile without answering. He knew it was a terrible thing to do. He understood where her thoughts went - that she believed his health wasn’t improving. He was honestly doing better than he ever had in his life, but letting her sit on the misconception that he wasn’t long for this world would make this easier for all of them.

Roderic looked between the two of them staring at each other. It was clear that Dahlia thought the worst was about to take place, and while Roderic wasn’t sure what was going through Gil’s head, the fact that he wasn’t answering meant he didn’t want to change Dahlia’s mind on that.

His own head was a chaotic mess of conflicting thoughts. He trusted Gilbert more than he trusted himself, and if it was an order, there was a reason for it. He wanted to fulfill any command given to him by Gil, but this felt like crossing a line he shouldn’t be allowed to cross.

Recomposing himself, Roderic looked to Gilbert for one last confirmation. “...Like you?”

Gilbert broke eye contact with Dahlia and gave a nod. “Just so.”

Roderic fell into character, or it would be better to say that he grew into character. Gilbert was a man that could command a room with his presence alone, and Roderic had to mimic that. Despite not actually taking on any size, his aura swelled and filled the space.

Dahlia could feel the pressure from both Gilbert and Roderic being in the same room, portraying the same person. She turned to watch, and while there wasn’t anything she could pinpoint as being different, Roderic looked more like Gilbert than when she had entered the room. His visible eye was the same blood red. His smile was placid and unreadable, just like Gil’s. Holding his cane and wearing his clothes, there was nothing visually that gave him away.

“Little rabbit, do you love me?” Gilbert’s words came from Roderic, but in Gilbert’s voice, in Gilbert’s manner of speech, and even his conversational mannerisms with the tilt to his head and the way he looked at her.

She had seen him do this multiple times by now, but never asking something like that. That was something only Gil asked her - that only Gilbert said to her. It felt wrong to hear it knowing it wasn’t him. But somewhere in her reasonable mind it was telling her that this was right. It sounded just like him, and it looked like him, who would it be if not her lover? Her head and heart were at odds, refusing to agree on what this meant.

“Gilbert…” Dahlia muttered and looked back at the man sitting next to her in bed.

“Uh oh, you should answer him. I hear the emperor of Obsidian isn’t a patient man.” Gilbert said, speaking as if he wasn’t the emperor, and as if Roderic really was him.

Dahlia shook her head, her eyes dropping to the floor. “I don’t want to…”

“Do you see the problem, Roderic?” Gil turned his attention to the faux emperor.

“We’re not a convincing couple.” Roderic responded, keeping up his Gilbert portrayal.

“The Empress doesn’t hold love in her heart for you. There will be messes to be cleaned up.”

“Her safety will be at risk.”

“The filth will look for weakness to exploit.”

“Dahlia?” The two had been speaking to each other in the same voice, in the same manner, and if Dahlia hadn’t been sitting between Gilbert in the bed and Roderic standing a few feet away, she wouldn’t have known who was saying what. But now her name came from the man on his feet, the one who looked and sounded just like Gil but wasn’t him, and it came in such a gentle tone that she knew he was much too human to be her lover.

Dahlia lifted her gaze and set it on Roderic. “What are we supposed to do about it?”

Gilbert leaned into Dahlia, his warm words gusting against her ear and neck. “Make it believable.”

She shivered at his words, her eyes kept on Roderic. Gilbert detested lies. She wasn’t sure she could manage to make something believable while knowing it was a lie. She felt in her heart that it belonged to one man, and that man was not replaceable, no matter what he believed. It was difficult to mimic that closeness with someone who was practically a stranger to her - with Roderic. They weren’t even friends. They barely knew each other. The number of times they’ve spoken could be counted on one hand, and now she was being asked to pretend he meant something to her? It wasn’t possible.

“What if we don’t?” Dahlia turned her eyes on Gilbert. This wasn’t fair of him to ask of her. He knew how she felt.

“You could choose to keep yourself confined to my room.” Gilbert barely moved far enough away that they could see each other, needing less space due to using only one eye. “You won’t be moving about the castle without one of us escorting you.”

“I thought you said the castle was safe.” Dahlia muttered.

“As long as I’m alive, you will be protected.” His words were absolute. He had no doubt that he could manage any situation that came their way, but… “Protected doesn’t mean safe.”

That’s where the problem was for Gilbert. His reach was not without limit. There would be people who would attempt to use Dahlia just to get to him. There already had been attempts to hurt her and he hadn’t even met her at that point. He had been watching out for her for a long time, and now that they were closer than ever before, more people would turn their malice on her.

The thunk of Roderic’s cane echoed eerily through the quiet room as he moved closer. “I’ll make it easy on you. Call it a gift.”

Roderic sat on the bed, thigh to thigh with Dahlia, giving her no room to herself. He set the cane against the edge of the high mattress and scooped Dahlia up into his arms and pulled her onto his lap. Gilbert watched as Dahlia’s eyes flew wide at being suddenly repositioned, and he let out an amused laugh. Dahlia sat stiffly on Roderic’s lap, who wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned his chin against her shoulder, cuddling against her the same way Gilbert often would.

“I won’t hurt you, little rabbit.” Roderic murmured sweetly to her.

Dahlia’s heart thumped roughly into a quick pace, her lover’s voice sounding sweeter than it ever had. Her eyes, however, were trained on her real lover, and his voice was not coming from next to her ear, not from the man who was holding her so tenderly. He was so warm , too. Gilbert had always been cold as ice, but Roderic was alive and warm and with the way he was draped about her it made it extremely noticeable.

“I know.” Dahlia had no doubts about that, even if he wasn’t acting as Gil. She would trust Roderic with her life if it ever came down to it, because she knew how much he cared about Gilbert– HE knew how much she cared about Gilbert, too. The day she had found him posing as Gil and learned who he was, they had cried together over their shared worry for Gilbert’s health. They had connected in a way that two people didn’t often connect.

Thinking of that time, and the position she was in now, tears started to well up in her eyes. If Gilbert wasn’t getting better - if his life was only extended for a few months, hopefully years… That’s still something to be thankful for. She would have to make those years the best years of his life, and keep encouraging him to keep living so she could only make them better and better.

Absently, Dahlia brought her hand up to her shoulder that Roderic was leaning on, her fingers sliding into his dark locks of hair, letting the strands glide between them. His hair was more coarse than Gil’s.

She quickly wiped at her eyes to prevent the tears from falling, then took a deep, calming breath and focused on her posture and body language. ‘Make it believable,’ Gilbert had said. She knew she could do this because Gilbert had asked it of her, and he wouldn’t make requests she couldn’t fulfill. Dahlia leaned into Roderic, forcing herself to relax in his lap. It was a strange thing to her, trying so hard to make it seem like she wasn’t thinking about every little detail and action so she would look as natural with Roderic as she did with Gil.

Roderic’s arms around her waist squeezed lightly, and she felt him press against her. The urge to jump off him was overwhelming, but Dahlia managed to keep her innate reflex tightly under wraps, only tensing slightly in response. “You won’t be biting me, will you?”

“Is that a request?” Roderic sounded amused. Dahlia could feel the way his muscles tensed as he shifted.

“No!” Instead of jerking away from him, she grabbed a fistful of his hair that she had been playing with, holding him in place.

Roderic’s eye went wide as Dahlia tugged his hair, snatching it up to keep him from moving in position to bite her. He wasn’t planning on going through with it, he was just going to toy with her a little. He hadn’t expected her to be so rough in refusing him, and he had to wonder if she was like this with Gilbert - perhaps there were things about Gilbert that even he didn’t know. Did she always talk to him like this? He had never heard it before.

“Dahlia can be bold and demanding when she is set on something.” Gil answered with a laugh, reading the surprise on Roderic’s face.

“The little rabbit has teeth, I should have expected that if she has managed to survive you for so long.”

“You two don’t have to talk about me like I’m not here.” Dahlia huffed, slowly letting Roderic go and rubbing her fingers against his scalp to ease any sort of pain she might have caused. “I just don’t want you biting me… Please?” The last word came out pleadingly.

Roderic felt a twinge of guilt. Gilbert was relentless in his teasing of Dahlia, but clearly he had crossed a line in replicating that. He wanted to make this easier on her by being as close as possible to the real thing, and here he was pushing her limits already. He turned to look at Gil for guidance on whose request he should be listening to.

“That’s a reasonable request.” Gil answered.

“Thank you.” Dahlia sighed with relief. “How long will we have to be like this? I think I can be convincing, but only if there’s an end in sight.”

Roderic remained silent. He was also curious to know how long the charade would go on. As far as he knew, Gilbert was getting better and it wouldn’t be long before he was himself again. While it was important in the interim to keep up appearances, he’d like to offer Dahlia some hope where Gil had decided to let her misunderstand the situation and snuff out that small hope.

“Who can say?” Gilbert kept it ambiguous. Roderic tilted his head at Gil, trying to figure out what it was that was going through the other man’s head. Dahlia all but sunk in Roderic’s lap.

“It won’t be long.” Roderic reassured her. He felt Gil staring at him, giving him a cold look that said he had disappointed the beast. The hairs on the back of his neck responded to the sudden discontent, but he kept his composure and pretended he didn’t notice the emperor’s disapproval.

“Then we’re done for today?” Dahlia pushed herself out of Roderic’s lap before either man could answer. “I have an idea of what needs to be done.”

She rounded back towards the bed and sat next to Gilbert again. It wasn’t lost on anyone the way her hand clung to his sleeve, or the way she leaned into him. The whole ordeal had certainly caused a chaotic tempest of emotions inside her, and yet she continued to look only vaguely distressed. She was learning to better school herself around others.

“For today,” Gilbert agreed.

He wrapped his arm around Dahlia and pulled her against his chest, leaning his head down to rest his cheek on the top of her head while her ear was pressed against his heart. The wound wasn’t yet healed, not surprising with the size of the incision needed for his surgery, but even the pain that came from him squeezing her against his chest was minor compared to the pain he had been living with his entire life. And he would suffer through it and more for the woman in his arms.

Dahlia had put on a brave front and worked through her own reluctance to perform what he had asked of her. He could feel her emotions trembling even though her body wasn’t. The rapid beating heart of a rabbit caught in the arms of a beast just endeared her more to him; he knew who it was that truly conquered who in their relationship. Perhaps he could forego the punishment he had planned, this time.

#ikepri fanfic #ikepri gilbert #ikepri roderic #ikemen prince #gilbert von obsidian #rjthirsty fanfic #fanfic #repost from ao3

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