#but even the level of my trying would always be more than a sane persons efforts
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Staring at my keyboard because I don’t even know what to say to all this *gestures at everyone and my life* /neg
#dora daily#never ceases to amaze me just how different people’s lives are from mine like#you guys actually somewhat tolerate living ? that’s interesting#my day consists of the equivalent of staring at the way#staring at the wall*#and getting disrespected and screamed at like daily#I am not even going to start to say how lonely it is because like genuinely I’ll be wasting my breath I’m tired of saying it and nothing#changing#I’m tired of taking steps to not being lonely anymore and nothing changing#I’m tired of seeing people having things I’ve been slaving towards so easily yet I have nothing and they have everything#I worked so hard for these few things and they’re pathetic compared to everything else#everyone else’s things that they get with such little effort or less effort than they could dream of when compared to me#I am depressed severely; I don’t have a lot energy I can expend so freely yet I try#but even the level of my trying would always be more than a sane persons efforts#how is that fair#they say better things happen but the good things are just small specks of goodness that later on make me feel bad#so they’re not remotely good anyways#to the point now I’m just horrified of the concept of things getting better because it’ll be like some uncanny valley experience#after almost 20 yrs it’s a bit too late for things to get better and truthfully I don’t know if I want it to be better because this dumpster#dumpster fire* has been all I’ve known
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FOAMING IN THE MOUTH AT THE FIRST CHAPTER!! the way you wrote dick still imagining reader as a small child because thats the only time he remembered them as is SO GOOD. i am living for the angst and desperation in this fic, and i can't to see how each of them react to the situation, especially damian because he and reader have the sane blood. when dick texted reader pretending everything is cool and like he didn't ignore them for thirteen years is a such a good concept. i can only imagine reader screaming on the other side because of opening the message accidentally lol. i cant stop thinking about how the reader's reaction to the text message would be like, finally moving on and healing and then boom! the trauma resurfaces and dick having the audacity to reach out while reader is having a breakdown, confused and scared for what'll happen next. sorry for filling up ur inbox!! i wrote a lot more than i thought oops take care of yourself and remember to takes breaks!!!! <3
reader when the self destructive impulses kicks in because of a family they have long gave up on finally started to notice them the moment they have moved on: 😧
no because dick grayson would infantilize you to the max. not in a "you're a toddler" way but rather he sees you as his innocent baby that he failed to guide and protect. he truly wants you to see him as the same person you view him as years ago, not wanting to be any less in the eyes of his baby bird <3
he'll admit that the things he's done is a shit move, constantly denying you when his entire schedule is flexible for the family but you.
so he should've expected to be blocked, but he just can't stomach it at all that his baby bird didn't even hesitate to cut him off in an instant! it just furthers his protective nature to a t and if it wasn't for damian suddenly appearing by the door, dick would've spiraled into insanity deeper.
what i mean by insanity is; he wouldn't sleep for days tracking you down, then he'll take you away from your wretched home and bring you back rightfully where you belong.
meanwhile, on the other side of gotham, you'd be on the verge of a panic attack, nearly splurging your guts out and trying to calm yourself with relaxation techniques. you quite literally couldn't walk straight without stumbling to the bathroom because holy shit imagine your brother whom you haven't nearly talked to for years suddenly called you! with cryptic messages no less that never implied your family's years of neglect towards you. i would be smashing my phone across the room, to be honest.
the moment he's turned a full yandere, damian would be really deep into the "blood is thicker than water" ideology when it comes to you. he'll apologize to you, glare plastered on his face and all, but compared to the others, his apology sounds so genuine yet condescending at the same time. you both are of the same blood, save for the fact that you share different mothers but that doesn't matter— he should be the favorite.
not dick, not jason, not tim, or anybody else for that matter. and he'll be shoving it in your face that he's the youngest so you should be obligated to baby him. and even if you dare make a point on how he had called you immature for your age multiple times, damian would find a way to guilt trip you and it would always fucking work. to avoid further spoilers, i wouldn't want to expand on his character traits but damian would be the worst type of pain in the ass, near the levels of dick.
#🍨... yael's talking#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere batboys#yandere dick grayson#yandere dick grayson x reader#yandere damian wayne#yandere damian x reader#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x gn reader#yandere x male reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#platonic yandere
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Kinktober Day 1 - Leather & Latex
Ghost x Soap - 4k (on ao3)
summary: Simon goes to a kink club looking for a masochist to beat. (Ghost POV)
cw: dom!ghost, sub!soap, sadist!ghost, masochist!soap, heavy painplay, undernegotiated bdsm because i didn't want to write it all out sorry lol but everything is 1000% safe sane and consensual
note: this is really not one of my faves of the month and i hate to start out on a not so strong note but oh well 🫠 hope you guys enjoy!
Simon leans against the bar, scanning the crowd for a potential play partner and swirling his glass of water lazily.
There are a few displays, but they rarely match Simon’s severity. He can hear Valeria whipping someone on a public stage, but her subs can never handle more than one session a night. Valeria’s as mean as he is - she puts on a good show, but always manages to get to the real painsluts before Simon can.
He needs someone who can take a few hits. Tonight his fingers twitch with the need to beat a pretty thing black and blue, he craves the pained cries and tears of a sub suffering so beautifully for him. None of his usual play partners are free tonight, all either coupled off already or busy, which means he’ll have to test drive someone new.
Always risky. In his experience, subs have a tendency to overestimate their pain tolerance when it comes to him. He tries to make his expectations as clear as possible going in, but it’s a coin toss on whether or not the sub will actually understand.
He’s contemplating moving to another club, listening as Valeria’s sub goes from shouting to screaming, when someone sidles up beside him.
The man is big, standing taller than almost everyone around him but barely eye level with Simon’s chin. He’s muscular too, defined abs and pecs displayed by his lack of a shirt. He’s got a chest harness on, one that wraps just under his tits and between them, a leather strap crossing across his collar bones and over his shoulders. There’s a little d-ring in the center - Simon imagines it’s for a leash to be hooked onto, considering his collar-less neck. He’s got something covering his groin at least, just a tiny and tight pair of leather shorts that Simon would bet money let his ass cheeks hang out.
He’s wearing an orange band on his right wrist - submissive, everything goes. Simon’s black band burns on his left - dominant, S&M
He raises his eyes back up the man once he’s done with his perusal, lets them linger appreciatively on his body. Simon’s always liked bigger subs, the ones who look like they can take a few blows and come right back for more.
The mohawked man smirks at him when they make eye contact, leans into Simon’s personal space with an elbow on the counter. “You’re not so bad yourself, handsome.”
Simon only cocks an eyebrow at that. He’s wearing his own leather pants and a tight latex top with a surgical mask over his nose and mouth, meaning there’s very little skin left uncovered for this sub to see. “Cocky, are we?”
The sub hums a little more, moves even further into Simon’s space. Surprisingly, he finds he doesn’t quite mind the intrusion. “Aye, I know I look damn good tonight. You lookin’ for someone to beat?”
Ah, right to business. Simon finds he likes this sub more and more every minute.
“Yes,” he replies, turning his body fully towards his potential partner and straightening up. “Need someone who can take whatever I decide to give. You gonna give out in the first twenty lashes?”
That gets him a snort, the smaller man moving so close they’re nearly bumping chests. “I hope that’s your warmup. Takes a lot to hurt me, I’m a right painslut. You up to the challenge?”
Simon gives the man another long look, assessing him a bit more, trying to gauge how much of his tone is bravado and how much is genuine. “What’s your name?”
“Johnny. Yours?”
“Simon. But you’ll call me Sir. Are you good with the traffic light system?”
Johnny perks up, like he hadn’t expected such an easy agreement. “Aye. You want to do this in private or on a stage?”
Simon shrugs, already abandoning his water and stepping away from the bar. “Up to you.”
“Showroom, then.”
Simon smirks at the decision, somehow unsurprised that this little sub is a bit of an exhibitionist. He strides off to the showrooms, doesn’t bother to glance over his shoulder to make sure Johnny’s following along.
There are already several people sitting in the audience for the impact-play room, watching another Dom carry their sub out through the one-way mirror. Simon holds the door open for Johnny once they’ve both cleared their intent with the dungeon monitor, confirming that they’re using the traffic light system as safe-words and that they’re going inside with no intention of having sex, just of beating and being beaten. Johnny’s antsy through the whole discussion, nearly bouncing on his toes in anticipation. It makes Simon’s lips curl beneath the mask, makes him want to grab the boy and force him still.
He pulls the mask off once they’re alone in the room, uncaring about their small audience seeing his face.
“Och, you really are handsome,” Johnny flirts, sliding up to Simon’s side and eyeing him like he’s his next meal.
Simon wraps a hand around his throat, has him pinned against the wall before Johnny even realizes he’s been moved. “That’s not how you refer to me, Johnny.”
The smaller man smirks, licks his lips and leans forward so Simon’s nearly choking him. “You really are handsome, Sir.”
That earns him a backhand to the face, gets Simon a sharp exhale and wide eyes in return. “Watch the attitude. You’re already getting the beating you want so badly, bratting won’t get you anywhere with me.”
This time, Johnny’s “Yes, Sir,” sounds far more sincere.
He pulls him away from the wall with a hand on his shoulder, sends him stumbling towards a Saint Andrew’s Cross in the middle of the room with a smack to the ass. “Stand there, back to me.”
Johnny swings his ass as he walks, sends a sultry look over his shoulder. Simon is careful not to give him anything, just crosses his arms and stands tall.
He moves forward once Johnny’s leaned on the cross, straps his ankles and wrists into the attached cuffs and double checks he’s not cutting off any circulation. He stands in front of Johnny for a moment, cups his chin and stares deep into the sub’s eyes to try and get a feel for his headspace. His eyes are clear, sparking with anticipation.
Johnny smirks up at him. “You’re gonna beat me black and blue, aren’t you?”
Simon can’t help the twitch of his lips. “Oh, I’ll break you, boy.”
“You’ll try.”
That gets Johnny his second slap of the night, an open-palmed crack against his cheek.
“Watch it. You okay with being naked, or you wanna keep those little shorts on?”
Johnny snorts a laugh. “Take ‘em off, they’re hardly covering much anyway. Get the harness off, too?”
Simon scowls at the expectant tone when he steps around Johnny, yanks his zipper down and leaves the shorts hanging loose around one ankle. He gives Johnny a few harsh blows to his ass, goes until his own palm buzzes pleasurably at the sting. If they were doing anything more than a little painplay, Simon would take the time to work on Johnny’s attitude.
“You just naturally a brat, is that it? You’ll speak to me with respect if you want your beating.”
That gets a moan, has Johnny shifting in his bindings. “Sorry, Sir.”
Simon gives his cheek a smart tap, then a squeeze. He’s got quite the ass, this Scotsman. Simon can’t wait to paint it red. He steps back after a moment of feeling him up, scans his options for the night where they hang against the wall.
He starts off with a flogger. It’s a lightweight thing, with thin leather tresses that’ll make for a nice but decently intense warmup to see if Johnny’s as much of a painslut as he claims. It’s light in his palm, and he swings it in the air a few times to stretch out his wrist and build up a bit of anticipation.
He starts laying strikes when Johnny starts wiggling again, paints them across the boy’s shoulder blades and a bit lower to turn him a light pink. His skin is tanned, so it takes a bit of work on his part. Johnny’s silent at first, still squirming around like he can hardly feel anything, so Simon increases the force of his swings at just a bit of a faster pace than he would’ve with another sub.
Johnny lets out a little sigh, like he’s relaxing into something pleasant, but he stays stiff and upright on the cross. No flinching, no cringing, no whimpering or whining.
Simon smiles to himself. First test, passed.
He continues his warm up, lays harder and harder strikes along Johnny’s shoulder blades and mid-back until he’s painted a nice rosy color, watches him settle a bit as the sting starts to sink in a bit more. By the end of the warm up, Simon loosened his dominant arm and wrist nicely, and set the tone well enough for Johnny to stay quiet and still.
At least, that’s what Simon thinks. Until he steps away to set down the flogger and pick his next tool, when Johnny looks over his shoulder with a confused look.
“That’s it?”
Simon raises an eyebrow. “That’s your warm-up.”
Johnny almost looks disappointed, resting his chin on his bicep. “Oh.”
Simon doesn’t speak, let’s Johnny stew in his own silence until he decides he’d like to finish his thought. It doesn’t take long.
“Are your twenty lashes gonna be like that?”
He fights down a smirk. “It’s a warm-up, Johnny. And you’ll be taking far more than twenty lashes, don’t start getting greedy.”
He doesn’t look fully mollified, but Johnny’s lips tilt up in the corner and he turns his head back to the wall. Simon rolls his eyes at Johnny’s back - God save him from bossy subs. If they were any more committed to each other, Simon would lock Johnny’s little prick up for an attitude like that. He’ll have to settle for humbling him with a few whips. Not the least fair trade-off in Simon’s mind.
He picks up a cat-o-nine with particularly thin leather tails, the type that should leave Johnny hissing if Simon uses it right.
He repeats his process, swings the tool through the air a few times to let Johnny hear it move, let him try and guess what’s coming. Again, he only makes contact once Johnny starts his squirming again.
He whips across the already pinked skin. Johnny sucks in a sharp breath at the first hit, releases it loudly and seems to steel himself for what’s coming. Simon can’t help his smirk now, laying lashes noticeably harder than he might with another sub.
There are clear markings across Johnny’s back where the tails hit, little raised red lines making a nice addition to the base color he’s already got going. It takes Johnny a bit longer to go still this time, takes a bit to settle into the pain but taking the whipping nicely once he does.
The color looks good on him. Johnny’s an incredibly muscular man, and the way he stiffens in anticipation of Simon’s next swing - the way his back muscles spasm a bit against his own will when he hits a particularly sensitive spot - has Simon chubbing up in his pants.
He lets out occasional little sighs at the sting, noises that seem entirely involuntarily as he starts to truly lean into the pain.
Simon adjusts his cock and gives Johnny a break after nearly 30 lashes, doesn’t say anything as he waits for whatever smart-ass remark he’ll get. He shifts back to the wall of tools as he waits, picks his next instrument.
Johnny doesn’t disappoint. He doesn’t glance over his shoulder this time, stays nice and still, loose, like the pain is starting to get to him.
“They got anythin’ more intense back there? No offense, Sir, but it’s lookin’ like your bark is bigger than your bite from this end of the leather-”
Crack!
That gets a loud cry from Johnny, his head thrown back and his spine arching away from the pain. The bullwhip feels good, familiar, in Simon’s palm, and he turns it a bit as he watches Johnny blink wide-eyed, watches him sink back into the correct position with a stiffer posture.
“Still think you can take your twenty lashes?”
Johnny huffs, hangs his head and shakes out his shoulders as best he can in his bindings. Simon watches as he slowly unlocks each of his muscles, smirks at the sign of an experienced painslut. Johnny knows damn well that the tenser he is the more he’ll hurt, and as much of a whore as he might be for his whippings, twenty lashes with a bullwhip are hard to take even loose-limbed.
Simon lets the whip drag on the floor, then cracks it through the air next to Johnny’s side. He laughs when the boy nearly jerks himself off of his cross, let’s his voice echo menacingly in the room to work Johnny up a bit more.
“Gonna have to be still if you don’t want to hurt yourself, Johnny. Be good now.”
Johnny drops his head a bit, groans as he clearly talks himself into going still. He does so a moment later, body nearly deadweight against the cross.
“Attaboy,” Simon rumbles. He snaps the whip, watches the sharp stripe of red form on Johnny’s back and nearly smiles when he cries out again. “Start counting.
Crack!
“Ugh, fuck, th-three.”
“Nope, you didn’t count the first two. Start over.”
“You’re fucking kidd-?!”
Crack!
“Fine- shit, one!”
Crack!
“T-two, Christ…”
“I don’t think I like your tone, Johnny. Start over. With respect this time.”
He really does smile at the agonized sound Johnny lets out. Poor little maso, doesn’t even know what he’s got himself into by baiting Simon all night.
“We’ll do twenty-five, just to make sure all that nasty attitude is properly beaten out of you. Remember to watch your tone.”
Crack!
“One, Sir!”
“There you go, Johnny, good boy.”
Crack!
“Two, Sir!”
The lashes look very nice along Johnny’s back. Simon almost wants to step forward and trace them with his tongue, watch Johnny cry out at the sting soothed by the soft muscle, whip him across that same spot and watch him wail…
Crack!
“Five… five, Sir!”
Simon’s careful not to let the whip wrap around at any points, lands his lashes in firm safe-zones to avoid any serious injury. It’s got the extra perk of layering his lashes on top of each other, making Johnny scream when he gets one after the other in nearly the same spot.
Crack!
“Seven, Sir… fuck…”
He doesn’t allow himself to fully sink down as he whips Johnny, he knows he needs to stay alert in case his sub’s tone shifts to anything that indicates real danger, but he lets himself float into Domspace just a bit. He feels powerful as he whips Johnny.
“Ten, Sir!”
Johnny’s shoulders quivers, and Simon adjusts himself in his pants again. There’s something so satisfying about bringing such a large, strong, masculine man to his knees (metaphorically, of course, seeing as Johnny couldn’t fall to his knees if he wanted to, tied up as he is). Johnny had walked through that club like he owned the place, head thrown back and showing off every piece of his body he could get away with.
“T-Twelve, Sir!”
It feels good to put him in his place. To metaphorically grind his heel firmly onto Johnny’s back, have him literally writhing and shouting while tied to a cross, taking his lashes like a good boy. The sight of such sharp red lines over all those hills and valleys of muscles…
“Sev… seventeen!”
“Seventeen what?”
“Sir! Sir, sir, seventeen, sir!”
Crack!
“Ei-Eighteen, Sir! I’m sorry, so sorry, Sir…”
“That’s alright, you’re still doing good, Johnny. Check in with me - you alright to keep going?”
The look Johnny shoots over his shoulder is almost offended, and surprisingly put-together considering his previous cries. “Course, Sir. Am still green. Will let you know if am not.”
Simon almost snorts. “Back around. You’re not done taking your lashes.”
There’s a smile on his lips when Johnny obeys his command. “Yes, Sir.”
“Hm. Keep counting.”
Crack!
“Nineteen, Sir!”
Simon’s surprised Johnny’s as coherent as he is at this point. He’s never pushed quite so far with a play partner on the first night, but Johnny’s eyes had been nearly clear when he’d glanced over his shoulder, only a few light traces of tears down his cheeks.
Crack!
“Twenty-two! S-Sir!”
His last three lashes are the hardest, even though Johnny’s already taken so much. He wants the boy broken down to pieces, wants him sobbing and unable to control it, wants him trembling and gasping for air in Simon’s arms.
Johnny nearly screams the final numbers, each of them laid one over the other.
“Twenty-five! Twenty-five, S-Sir!”
“Hmm, good boy, Johnny. Took your lashes well for me.”
Simon lays the cruel whip back in its place, steps around in front of Johnny and cups his chin to raise his face and make eye-contact.
Those last few lashes did their job, Johnny already looks far more fucked out than he had only minutes earlier. The stream of tears down his face is constant now, but his brow is smooth and his lips quirk up into a little smile, giving Simon all of his weight and trusting him to hold him up.
Simon strokes his leather-clad thumb over Johnny’s chin. “Color?”
Johnny doesn’t answer right away, clearly focuses on cataloguing himself and the pain now that it’s not coming so consistently. Simon’s glad to see him take the time to answer truthfully, continues to stroke across his chin for a bit of comfort. Eventually, Johnny blinks back up at Simon and says, “Green, Sir.”
He can’t help but smile a little. “Want to go a little longer, then?”
That gets him a smirk. “If your arms aren’t tired yet.”
Simon backhands him, lets his chin go so he jerks into his own arm and muffles his groan into his bicep.
“Never met a brat who’s quite as much of a painslut as you. It’ll be fun to watch you beg.”
Johnny’s canines peek out behind his lips when he grins. “Do your worst, Sir.”
Simon gives him a sharp little tap to the cheek, another to his ass when he walks away. “I’ll make you regret that, Johnny. You’ll be sceamin’ yourself hoarse by the time I’m done with you.”
The gloves Simon slips on after taking his off are heavy, a little warmer than he’d usually like for daily use, but the sharp spikes down each of the fingers are what really matters. He tests one with a fingertip as he talks to Johnny, smirks at the sting.
“You wish. Haven’t had a Dom make me cry like that in years, you think you’ll be the one to break my streak?”
Simon smirks as he hovers just at Johnny’s side, feels the heat emanating from the sub’s body and watches sweat drip down his back.
“Oh, I know I will.”
He lands a sharp smack against Johnny’s bared ass, makes sure to curve his fingers just so to make sure Johnny feels each and every barb.
He yelps, jerks away from the sting and squirms a little in his binds. Simon bites his tongue to keep from laughing as he watches Johnny’s face go from teasing and a little dazed to shocked, wide-eyed and mouth gaping.
He doesn’t wait for another response, only begins to rain down smacks on Jonny’s ass. He’s careful not to slam the spikes too deeply - doesn’t know how Johnny is with blood, doesn’t want the dungeon monitor to make it his business when Simon is so close to bringing Johnny down - but that doesn’t blunt the impact any. With the spacing of the spikes and his own fingers, it’s nearly impossible for him to not layer the hits over one another.
Simon angles himself just a little further forward, to get a better look at Johnny’s face as he starts to writhe, starts to try and run from the pain. His face is scrunched up beautifully, tears dripping down his chin and to the floor. He grits his teeth against moans.
They go like that for a bit. Simon moves himself fully behind Johnny to land slaps with both hands at once, spends some time with just Johnny’s upper thighs for a bit so they don’t feel neglected. His whole back is red, from shoulders to thighs, and the sight gives Simon that rush he’s been itching for all day.
When Johnny goes from moans to whimpers Simon moves to the front of the cross, places his gloved-hands lightly over Johnny’s chest to get his attention.
“Look at me, Johnny.” Simon waits, gives the sub as soft a smile he can when Johnny’s teary eyes meet his. “Color?”
It takes a moment, but Johnny stutters out, “G-green,” with a breathless pant, his body loose against the cross.
Simon hums as he wraps his arms around Johnny, presses his elbows tight to the boy’s ribs and places his hands firmly on Johnny’s shoulders. “Good boy.”
He drags down over the lashings, watches with rapt attention as Johnny screams.
His face goes red with it, veins popping in his neck, spit dribbling down his chin, body fighting to get away from the pain even tied as firmly to the cross as he is. Simon smiles, strokes his hands up and down in uneven patterns without easing the pressure.
“F-fuck, fuck, oh my God, sir- sir, I- fuck!”
“That’s it,” Simon chuckles, gives a few harder presses into place he knows Johnny’s more sensitive and relishes in the sound of his scream cracking. “Scream for me, boy, c’mon.”
He follows commands beautifully, Johnny. Simon’s not sure he’s ever been so satisfied watching a sub break down, watching them lose all control and go into the pain completely.
He lets himself indulge in Johnny’s pain-filled expression for as long as his boy can bear, drags his hands up and across his most sensitive spots, squeezes his ass a few times to reignite that sting.
Eventually Johnny manages to blink hazy eyes up at Simon, murmurs, “Yellow, Sir,” softly, tears still dripping down his cheeks and his breath hitching.
Simon can’t hold back his smile as he takes the gloves off, unchains Johnny and eases his limbs down. The Scot is all dead weight in his arms, but Simon’s more than strong enough to carry one subbie out of a showroom.
He’s careful with the way he carries Johnny so he doesn’t aggravate any painful spots - he hefts him over his shoulder, keeps a hand behind both of his knees to hold him steady and resists the urge to stroke his glowing ass, to feel how the heat emanates from it. There’s a little drunk giggle from over his back when he flips Johnny up.
The previous Dom and sub have cleared out the aftercare room just outside of the showroom, meaning Simon’s got free reign to coax his sub for the night down to planet Earth.
He lays him out, stomach down, on a long leather couch. The furniture’s upkeep cost must be insane considering how many sweaty bodies have laid across it, but it’s in pristine condition as Simon sits.
He tucks Johnny’s head into his lap, turns his face to the side and gives him long, slow pets down his mohawk. Johnny hums a bit at the contact, burrows his face deep into Simon’s stomach and reaches his free hand down to wrap around Simon’s ankle.
He’s endearing when he’s blissed out, his little face peaceful and his limbs loose, his back covered in Simon’s marks and his sub seemingly all the happier for it. He’ll have to get some soothing cream in a few minutes, have to properly take care of Johnny’s body when he’s not conscious enough to do it for himself.
But that can wait. For now, Simon leans his head against the back of the couch, continues his soothing motions through Johnny’s hair, and thinks about how he’ll coax the sub into another session sooner rather than later.
#this one is so much longer than it was supposed to be im so sorry lol#ghoap#ghostsoap#ghost x soap#soap x ghost#bo writes#john soap mactavish x simon ghost riley#john mactavish x simon riley#soap mactavish x ghost riley#kinktober 2023#kinktober day 1#ghoap smut#ghostsoap smut#cod fanfic#call of duty fanfic#hey google how do i get people to see my fic without putting it in the tags for people looking at like gifs and stuff#kinktober
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Keeping the Skies Clear
One shot of Ragatha and Jax! @estro-gem Thank you for finally pushing me over the edge with your amazing fics! to finally start writing for my current hyperfixation. (I was the fan anon this is just my side blog)
Anyway, this about year before the pilot. Zooble's the new kid in town and pushes a dumb bunny just trying to do his "job" keeping a close eye over a devastated Ragatha at another lost friend. I would say poke the bear and find out but Zooble's tough as nails, they can handle anything thrown at them.
Ragatha was the nicest and most stable of them. When Zooble first came, Ragatha was the one to calm her down, as she often did for everyone who allowed it. And, despite how many times it happened, she was always so sad when another one of them abstracted. She was here the longest next to Kinger, yet she was still the most sane one here.
Zooble would like to be in the same mood that Ragatha was always in, but they also knew that behind closed doors she was one of them who was struggling the most. She cared too much about other people before herself. She found this out after Zooble saw their first abstraction. They couldn’t sleep that night, so they wandered the circus until they finally decided to head back to their room in the middle of the night, thinking everyone was asleep by now.
Only when they crossed by Ragatha’s room and heard muffled, sorrowful sobs dulled by a pillow did they figure out the truth. Zooble was never the first person to comfort someone; in fact, they hated being a shoulder to lean on, considering Ragatha had been by their side since they first got there. They felt a kind of guilt for not returning the favor.
As they were about to knock on the door, a gloved hand caught theirs. They nearly jumped in shock, only to realize it was Jax, and the shock was replaced with a glare. “What the-” They said before he gave a hushed “Shut it!” He pointed to the door with his thumb, obviously telling them to be quiet, or Ragatha would hear.
Zooble once again looked at him in shock before he grabbed them by the elbow away from the door a little before Zooble yanked away. “What the @#!$ Jax?” Zooble said, annoyed, but still made sure to keep their voice to a lower volume. His smile seemed to widen at their annoyance.
Even after two months, they still didn’t really care to get to know anyone beyond surface-level things, except Ragatha, who did her best to keep the unwilling newcomer company. Jax was only what they saw on the outside. A mythic A-hole.
So without beating around the bush, they cut to the chase and asked, “Why do you even care?”
His face drops for a nanosecond before he switches back to his regular yellow grin, looking bored at where his finger nails would be. “I actually don’t, for your information.”
Zooble scoffed, rolling their eyes. "It doesn't seem like it. You’re the one stalking her door in the middle of the night to stop anyone from seeing if she’s okay, Jeez. I knew you were a sadist prick picking on the only person who no doubt deserves to be here all the time, but I didn’t think you actually hated her.”
A loud thump on the floor snapped their vision back to the rabbit man. His slightly tinted purple face suddenly filled with a darker purple angry flush, and the rabbit ears that shot up past his hair pulled back. His smile finally turned downward as they glowered over Zooble. “You’ve been here, what? A month, and you think you know me? Get real, @#$%@.” He pointed a gloved hand in their faces.
Despite the slight surprise of seeing him for the first time, seeing him actually pissed off Zooble’s face remained in a glare that matched his slapping his hand out of their face. “You have all of two seconds to get out of my face, or you’ll wish you were the one to go today. Maybe everyone else puts up with your #&^$ but not me %#&*!^.”
He scoffs and backs off, making his face go back into a neutral expression. “*@ off, the only reason I’m not making your life more of a hell than this place is so you don’t wake up. Raggedy dumb@$%.”
Wake up? Zooble only just noticed the sobbing had stopped, replaced with an oddly louder snore. “She’s been crying for like two hours; she thought she’d never stop.” He said it once again, looking bored, but as he listened to her snore a bit more, they could see he was visibly almost completely back to his normal relaxed and annoying nature.
“Why?” They asked.
They knew Jax didn’t need a clarifier but asked, playing dumb anyway. “Why what, Crabby?”
Zooble once again cut straight through his bullshit, “Why do you care? Really.”
He scoffed and placed his hands in his dumb, cartoonish overall pockets. “I told you I don’t.” He looked at Zooble's deadpan face and knew they wouldn’t drop it until they got an answer. He almost told her to buzz off again before they threatened to ask the whole circus if he wasn’t going to give them an answer. “Freaking nark”.
“Fine.” He rolled his eyes until they went almost to the back of his head. “If I tell you, you can’t say jack. If Rags finds out, this will all be for nothing, got it?” Zooble stayed silent but nodded.
“When she gets this way, if anyone says a word to her, she’ll get even more depressed for, like, a week.”
“Why?”
“Some dumb need to never ‘upset’ anyone. The one thing she hates more than anything is thinking she hurt someone. Which is dumb as hell. I get she has this bleeding heart or whatever, but the woman needs to seriously bite the bullet and be an @#$hole one of these days.”
He continued after a moment of silence, “When she’s all depressed, everything and everyone feels like shit. I hate to admit it, but she kind of makes this place bearable for everyone. like the sun through the clouds or whatever that dumb poet said. Anyway, this place gets dark as shit at that point. And doing funny things to people when they have a reaction of a brick wall is boring as hell. Messing with people is the only thing that keeps me from going insane in this place. That’s why.”
Zooble stays quiet for a moment, like they're processing everything he said before they nod, brushing their pink hair out of their face. “Makes sense. Kinda.”
He rolls his eyes again, not caring whether they approve of his reasons or not. Until they broke the silence again, “Like the sun through the clouds, huh?”
His head snaps to theirs, and they let out an amused exhale through their nose before speaking again before he can retort. “Don’t worry, Romeo; the secret's safe with me.” They laughed as they walked away.
He actually almost strangled them at that moment, but was interrupted by a particularly loud, pig-like snort/snore from across the hall, and he rolled his eyes, smirking a bit. Before catching himself and pitching the bridge between his nose trying to stop the oncoming headache. Whatever she’s asleep, she’ll be back to her cheery facade in the morning. He’d done his personal job of keeping the sanity in this place level.
His personal job of keeping the sun out of the clouds.
#jax tadc#the amazing digital circus jax#tadc ragatha#the amazing digital circus ragatha#tadc#tadc zooble#the amazing digital circus#jax x ragatha#ragatha x jax#jagatha#bunnydoll#mia writes
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Ramblings stemming from frustration with this fandom sometimes. ( Naruto. )
I know Naruto fandom has always been a tad toxic ever since it started becoming popular and such, but something about these newer fans who are so comfortable with d3ath threats, body shaming, sa threats, and d0xxing other people for the sake of a character. Fandom discourse is truly never that serious and the fact that they’ve become so obsessed with “ratioing” or “owning” other people that they’re willing to say absolutely vile things all for what… some likes? Validation from other gross people?
And then for these people to still say they’re the “good part of the fandom” or “the sane part”. It’s almost narcissistic for lack of a better word at the moment. ( not diagnosing anyone or speaking as if I’m some sort of mental health expert. Just can’t think of another word right now because of the headache this phenomenon is causing me as it is becoming much too common. )
They have this obsession with demonizing “the other side.” To the point of making false claims, which is insane. Or maybe they actually believe them? I can’t tell. They just spread whatever makes them feel good about what they like and don’t care about the source.
This is mainly a lame annoyed rant about the Hinata fanbase which have become somehow even worse within the past few days with their weird obsession with trying to get the Boruto artist (I think he works for sp? Unsure as he says most of his art is fanart but he made a like two or three official pieces that were on the official boruto/naruto page.) fired and sending him death threats for I guess just not drawing Hinata as much as they want? Like to the point where they were literally saying she was being “oppressed and bullied” by this artists. It was insane to see in person because you really would like to believe people WOULDNT compare a character not being drawn in a way they approve of to the oppression the people of Palestine are facing but hey, I suppose it’s a competition now to see how much of a bad person you can be for the sake of a character.
Also I know this is not just an issue in the hinata fandom, although the recent need to fetishize how “Asian Hinata is compared to that white girl sakura.” Is irking me a lot more than what other fandoms have done as of recent that I’m aware of. The Sakus seem to be their usual level of delusion and crappy attitude. Which is easy to ignore for me.
Does it sound like I’m making stuff up at this point? Because as I’m writing this I’m seeing just how insane this really is. This *shouldn’t* be real. This *shouldn’t* be things people say without shame. And yet, people just throw their morals for… what, internet points? The self validation that they defended to their favorite character? Who knows.
You might not even read this, I wouldn’t blame you lol. Just me being annoyed with how comfortable people within the naruto fandom have become so comfortable with being bad people.
My only real question is have you noticed an increase of toxicity within the fandom? Do you think this behavior has gotten worse with the ending of Naruto and beginning of Boruto?
I kinda get what you mean. I remember even before the manga ended there was apparently aggressive fights between Narusaku/Naruhina shippers, like the body shaming towards the other ship's girl and so on. And SS also were aggressive. But nowadays it indeed seems worse. I'm not sure if it's because we have new big platforms? Twitter and Tiktok I mean, both have really cancerous fandom spaces.
SS/NH harass official staff all the time, as well as other parts of the fandom. And then they act like victims because some people think Sakura and Hinata are shitty characters lol. Meanwhile they treat real people like shit. I think it might be because everyone makes fun of their ships/girls all the time, because it's so easy, so they become even crazier in trying to compensate, they try to harass the staff for more content for their ship, to get back at the people who say their ships suck. Also because so many popular content creators keep making content on Naruto and Sasuke being gay and Sakura/Hinata being their beards it's also humiliating to them.
Of course, they also need to fight which girl is the best girl. Which girl is less of a single mother for example. XD
"Or maybe they actually believe them?" Considering how many SS have convinced themselves that some moments that happened between Naruto and Sasuke actually happened between Sasuke and Sakura, I can believe them being that delusional.
"Does it sound like I’m making stuff up at this point?" No because I have witnessed it myself, plenty Sakura and Hinata stans on twitter have that toxic "bad bitch" attitude that they think makes them queens or whatever, they harass people and are extremely aggressive and think female character doing the bare minimun = queen behaviour. It comes off as very childish and narcissistic. No wonder Sakura and Hinata as characters appeal to them.
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Hello could you please do a treasure mafia reaction to their s/o finding out they're mafia? I love your works so much and they always make my day better thank you!
hi, thank u so much <3 c:
tw / trigger warning: yandere themes, mafia, mentions of murder n torture, stalking, manipulation, gaslighting
Treasure reaction to their s/o finding out they're in the mafia
Hyunsuk
He'd be extremely surprised. The view of you as an innocent, helpless angel would be immediately shattered. You - his darling was smart enough to figure something like that out? That sounded ridiculous.
Hyunsuk wasn't sure if he liked it because of the view of a naive person he had of you in his head. But what was worst of all was that you didn't react the way he thought you would, you didn't feel disgusted or super surprised; you only asked him to quit, a stoic look on your face.
If he refused to quit you would try to be brave and join the mafia too, just to prove to him that you were on the same level as him - if not even more powerful, as you'd do anything to climb your way up.
Of course that wouldn't happen though. He would never let you join it.
'' But why do you need to? I don't understand that! '' you shouted.
He was getting heated, face red which was mirroring your own as you fought for your lives to stand your grounds.
'' Because I can! I'm not at all who you think I am, y/n. '' he screamed back, with an equal amount of passion burning in his brown eyes.
Your boyfriend finally sighed. In his mind you were acting like a child and this wasn't going to be settled any time soon, but he'd be sure to try and pull the strings behind the scenes - just so he could win this argument in the long run, and get you to become exactly the way he wanted again.
Jihoon
He was enraged. Both with you for snooping around and himself; in a way he felt humiliated that while manipulating you he had forgotten to hide such a crucial thing, basically out in the open for you to find. It felt like a direct blow to his ego.
But now that the cat was out of the bag and you knew for sure he had been playing you like a puppet all throughout your relationship, putting on a sweet fake persona to make you fall for him - then there was no point in defending his actions or keeping the act up anymore.
It was a relief in a way, a blessing in disguise. Jihoon would however have to deal with the fact that you'd now try to leave him. Since the sweet boyfriend you knew was gone, it had all been an illusion. He knew he'd have to try extra hard to manipulate you into accepting this version of him too - but he does like a challenge after all.
'' I only joined it to protect you. ''
You ignored his words, rolling your eyes in his direction so he'd see it. He was fuming on the inside, wanting to do nothing but go up to you and put you in your place. Unfortunately he had more self-control than you thought. So he settled on only showing a sour smile.
'' I don't kill people. '' Jihoon was going to try something else if his sweet words didn't trick you.
You raised your eyes to look at him, a curious look on your face. Then, he knew that the game had started again.
Yoshi
It didn't matter to him and it wouldn't make a difference. You already knew he was a lovesick psycho when it came to you, so him being in the mafia shouldn't be a surprise at all.
Maybe a part of you felt a bit disappointed. The part that believed in Yoshi and believed he would one day become sane, letting you leave if you wanted to. You told yourself that he wasn't an evil person. He just wanted to be loved and love the only way he knew.
Finding out he was in the mafia by overhearing his guest talk to his workers was like a slap in the face. It was incredibly hard to accept, and it would be equally hard to pretend you hadn't found something out when your boyfriend called you in.
He was sitting by his desk when you stepped into his office. You hid your clasped hands behind your back so he wouldn't see them shaking, but his sharp eyes still noticed something was off.
'' Come here. ''
You obliged, coming over to sit in his lap. His hand came up to brush some strands of hair from your face. The soft touch was a stark contrast to his stern gaze.
'' Now, tell me what's wrong. '' he demanded.
You released a shaky breath and shook your head.
'' Really? '' he scoffed, ticking his tongue in annoyance. '' I thought you knew better by now. I guess you wanna do this the hard way then. ''
Junkyu
He was terrified. Having worked so hard to keep this a secret from you was for a reason. This would mean you would hate him, and be scared of him.
It was one of his biggest nightmares. Even if he hated that part of himself, all he ever wanted was for you to see him the way he wished he was.
Gone were the sweet moments you'd gush over each other; him being able to freely express that pent up love he had to keep to himself until he finally made you fall for him - and you swooning over who you thought was the sweetest boy in the world. You'd always felt very lucky to have him, and even your friends were extremely jealous of you.
'' I'm leaving now babe, I will be back in about two hours so you can go to bed without me. '' your boyfriend mumbled while placing a soft kiss to your temple.
You glanced at the clock, eyebrows knitting at the numbers showing, - 02:25. It was very late, what could he possibly have to do at this time?
Your gut feeling was telling you something was off, so you decided to follow him discreetly. Luck was thankfully on your side as visibility was low, slight fog mixed with pouring rain made Junkyu's driver focus his attention forwards; not noticing the dimmed lights of the dark car behind them.
After about twenty minutes of driving on an off-road path that had very little traffic, the car came to a stop at a worn down building to the side of the road.
You stopped a few hundred meters behind, hidden tactfully in the bushes. It was the perfect place to hide. With the car to your left you crouched and peeked.
Junkyu stepped out of the veichile and approached a man you hadn't noticed before.
In the blink of an eye, you watched in horror as your boyfriend plunged a knife deep into the mysterious man. An uncontrollable gasp escaped you while the man slumped to the ground, groaning in pain.
Junkyu's eyes immediately darted towards your direction, because you had accidentally made a loud noise that drew attention towards you.
Now, it was your boyfriend's turn to be horrified, his face grew pale as he stepped towards you and you met eyes with him.
'' Baby? What are you doing here? '' he asked in a small voice.
Jaehyuk
He was very angry with you for being nosy and would punish you severely for it.
The point wasn't that you found out, he couldn't really care less about that since you were already terrified of him - but you broke a rule of his, which is why you now must face the consequences.
Going behind his back was a sign of you not respecting him, something Jaehyuk valued very much. Besides, you had lied when he spotted you leaving his office.
'' What were you doing in there? ''
You had a hard time looking at him. Your boyfriend had caught you red-handed and now you probably looked like a deer in headlights.
'' I was just, uh- cleaning. '' you hurried to blurt out.
But he didn't believe it for one second.
'' You just couldn't help yourself, could you? '' Jaehyuk growled into your ear.
You could only whimper as you felt the cold knife sink excruciatingly slow into your skin, painting your thigh with warm scarlet. He didn't like when you made too much noise, so you bit down into your lip until you could taste metal.
'' Answer me. '' he demanded.
'' I-I'm sorry. ''
Asahi
As long as you wouldn't make a big deal out of it - either by causing problems or annoying him with arguments, then he was fine with it.
He had never really bothered to pretend to be someone he was not. You had always seen all sides of him, good and bad.
However, if you decided to disobey then you'd be locked up promptly. He would refuse to see you, even after long hours of work. Not until you'd apologise and promise to behave.
With enough stress that the mafia brought him, the last thing Asahi needed was to get annoyed by the person he loved most. Even though he felt embarrassed to admit it; what he craved was for you to greet him lovingly after those days and pamper him for the rest of the evening - peppering kisses while his sleepiness took over, tangled up on the couch together.
'' I wish you wouldn't act like this. '' Asahi said to himself as he tightened the ropes around your wrists.
His voice had a twinge of sadness in it, and maybe disappointment too. But you refused to feel guilty and let him manipulate you into doing so.
'' Fuck you. '' you spat out through clenched teeth.
He sighed.
'' After this you will be changed. Because - it will break you. '' a small smile crept up on his lips.
Doyoung
He felt extremely panicked. You stopped answering his calls and texts after confronting him about messages you had seen on his phone.
They were between him and his body guard, discussing illegal things in a cryptic manner that made you immediately realise that he was doing something shady.
When you shoved the phone with the incriminating texts in his face, he became quiet. You went on a minutes long tirade, screaming with tears in your eyes. But he was still unresponsive, he also had tears in his eyes and was almost hyperventilating as he watched you anxiously.
'' Are you seriously trying to play the victim now and not respond to me? Fine, I'll fuck off. '' you huffed and walked out, slamming the door behind you.
The sound of the door reverberating in the silence made him snap out of his trance and he immediately picked up his phone. Frantic texts were sent to your phone that went ignored.
The next fifteen minutes Doyoung spent on the couch, staring at the phone he had thrown away in panic and frustration at your radio-silence.
More time passed and by the time the sun was going down he was even more of a panicked mess. He couldn't care less now if you'd get madder at him, but he ordered his men to go out to look for you and bring you home.
Haruto
A mix of pissed off and protective. He feared that his enemies had now figured out your connection to him and was going to use you against him.
Having you be kidnapped, and possibly tortured or killed was one of his biggest fears. He therefor cursed all the Gods above that you just happened to walk outside when one of the biggest mafia bosses was headed to your home.
Of course you had no idea who he was, and being friendly and polite you struck up a conversation with him. While doing so you failed to notice how the eyes of the man in front of you slowly started sparkling.
He must've figured out exactly who you were, and his smile was now genuine despite him being annoyed by you just a second ago.
'' Sorry, sweetheart. As much as I'd love to talk to you right now, I've got business with your boyfriend. '' he winked flirtatiously to you and was about to go up the stairs to the front door when he froze for a moment.
Both of the men staring at each other had been caught off guard. Haruto had just been on his way out to bring you in before the mafia boss would arrive - imagine his surprise and anger when he noticed he had been too late, you standing there blissfully ignorant while the boss smirked at him.
'' What the fuck are you doing outside? '' he barked at you.
Your face fell and you felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment due to getting scolded in front of a stranger. But you went inside anyway and stayed in your bedroom until he came back in after the meeting, shaking with fury.
Jeongwoo
Quickly takes control of the situation to make sure he could manipulate you into thinking it was a good thing. By the time the conversation was over, you'd be in awe over what a sweet and considerate boyfriend you had who joined the mafia to protect you.
He left out bits on purpose of course. Like how he had even gotten infatuated with you from the beginning was because he was doing a mission and happened to spot you.
If you ever found out about the additional lies, no worries - he'd just do some more manipulation and maybe even gaslighting to make you feel bad.
'' You followed me secretly, just because you thought I was cheating and now...'' he ruffled his hair in frustration.
'' Now you want to play the victim. '' a scoff left his lips which immediately had the effect he wanted to - you lowered your head in embarrassment, knowing he was right.
'' I'm sorry. '' you mumbled.
Junghwan
He wasn't the best at hiding stuff from you, so you'd notice something was going on that he didn't want you to know about pretty quickly.
Whenever he came home late, sometimes with injuries on his face; he'd avoid your questioning and worried gaze, walking right past you while giving tame excuses.
The day when you'd actually find out was getting nearer the busier he got. Since it meant he often got into fights and no matter how good his team were, they couldn't conceal all the cuts and bruises.
'' Please, Junghwan. Can we finally talk about this now? ''
Your pleading eyes looked into his anxious ones. He looked hesitant like always when cornered like this, but then his furrowed brow softened and he heaved a sigh.
'' Okay, just- promise you won't leave me...please. '' he begged, already looking like he was on the verge of tears.
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What did you think of Anne's sacrifice/death/rebirth, especially compared to Luz's? Do you think it's the sane Anne, or was she replaced by a copy?
So I've talked before about how the death/rebirth of Anne is beautiful. How death is the greatest change we as humans have to ever face and Anne embraces it to save the community she cared about. It's pitch perfect thematically and her understanding she's still a dumb teen and STILL embracing death instead of godhood not only helps keep the thematics on point but also is just great for her character.
As for the clone... Why does it matter? A large part of Amphibia's optimism with change is that our experiences shape us. That they and the people we have met along the way will always be a part of us and shape who we shall be. Since this Anne has all of her memories, all of her experiences, all of those connections... Why should we argue about whether the cells and the like are the same? That is Anne.
It's actually a fun parallel to the Ship of Theseus that doesn't require transfer of souls or the like. That is Anne because she has the spirit of Anne. The personality. The heart. She could be placed into a giant monster or a tiny robot and it would still be Anne. Arguing if she's the same or not is pointless.
Also, comparing it to Luz is laughable. TOH doesn't have themes that fit trying to portray death as an accidental thing you can't control, the only reason The Collector needs saving is due to stupid writing, the choice isn't hers and her going to see the Titan pretty much purely exists for LITERAL GOD to pat her on the head, give her a cookie, tell her she's special and then let her go. Hell, the fact that Luz gets given a choice barely works on a meta level, let alone a narrative one. Do you want to go back, save all your friends, be beloved by all and get to live out the same sort of consequence free fantasy you've always wanted to? Or do you want to die and let everyone you know die for no reason? Especially no reason when you've gone through THREE different character conclusions IN THIS SEASON about you forgiving yourself for your singular mistake that barely mattered to anything.
That is INFINITELY more stupid and meaningless than "Do you feel confident to control the fates of UNIVERSES or do you have humility and accept that you did good and are willing to die with that?" Because remember: Anne isn't revived because she asks to be. She's revived because her willingness to believe ANYONE can improve and no one is flawless, INCLUDING HER, convinces the god that hey, if I think she's ready now, just imagine what more life experience will do to her? Before she gets revived without it even actually being her choice. Though, she does say that she'd like to live again which stops it from being like the guardian is doing something she doesn't want.
It's beautiful and part of why I had to talk about how the fandom undersold it because sure, you can describe it as "Anne dies saving Amphibia and then is revived by god," but that is leaving out JUST how good the writing is. Then again, much of Amphibia looks just fine on paper but looking a little closer almost always yields so much more than you'd expect.
======+++++======
I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!
I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.
And finally a Twitter you can follow too!
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I will openly admit that to this day my biggest disappointment in indie vtubers and being an indie vtuber was that vtuber teams were not nearly as cool as they could have been because no one knew what made a team good in the first place.
If you don't know, a Vtuber team is essentially a small collective of streamers (roughly 3 - 5) who would work as a sort of "team" or group. They'd collab and promote one another and often had their own discord servers or ways to keep in touch with the various different members.
Now, lets say you're a sane everyday person, who is actually friends with your fellow team members. You wouldn't say; go around bad mouthing them for clout, backstabbing them and trying to assimilate their audience into your own after they prove to be more successful. You likely wouldn't plan "mandatory" meetings and then get mad at them when they refuse to show up because they've not had a day off from their actual paying job in over 5 months and they're literally so sick they can't get up the stairs to their computer and would rather spend their time with their significant other. You certainly wouldn't tell them they should voice their concerns about a big group change to everyone and then immediately double back on what you said when the rest of the group decides to ostracize them for having a bad opinion even though you just told them their thoughts are more in line with the goal of the team.
Right?
If you can't tell, as someone who has been in a handful of teams I've become somewhat jaded by them. They're a great model for actually promoting one another, having constant collabs so you don't need to constantly stream alone, and generally having some kind of group atmosphere which helps raise popularity since I can promote you even when you're not streaming, and you can promote me when I'm not streaming. However this doesn't work in reality because too many people are too focused on their own personal ambitions and are far too willing to jump into the fire of drama and throwing-each-other-under-the-bus bullshittery.
If it wasn't extremely clear, everything I mentioned above is shit that ACTUALLY has happened to me. I've never in my life had to say, verbally, aloud; in a call with other adults "I am going to hang up, because I am sick; I have not had a day off in months, and you call me here to yell at me over shit that doesn't even matter. Grow up, and learn that you do not hold power over others; if you want to make mandatory meetings, control my voice and my content, and tell me what I can and cannot do; you can pay me. I will leave my paypal in the general chat." Until I was in a team.
So what goes wrong? It can't just be that people get a taste of being popular and suddenly throw it all away, right?
... I mean. Yea. It sorta can be.
I'm not going to say this is exclusively what always happens all the time, but I will say it was what I saw happen the MAJORITY of the time. Essentially, it becomes fandom bullshit levels of cliche-y real quick.
You will inevitably have some members of the team who are more popular than others, and some who are by proxy less popular. Some might be better at holding a more dedicated and consistent audience while others, despite having more numbers on twitter; can't actually get numbers on their streams.
If you've made it this far, buckle up because I'm going all in here.
To properly explain this whole ordeal I'm going to walk you, yes you; through what it might be like to be part of a Twitter Indie Vtuber Team and you will see exactly why it never worked.
So if we're going to join a Vtuber team we need to be a Vtuber, the fun part here is that it literally doesn't matter who or what you are. You might be someone who cares deeply about lore, plot, and character; you might be more like me and not really think that matters so much as putting on a show for your audience. You might be somewhere in the middle. Maybe you're a sci fi character, maybe you're high fantasy, maybe you're some really generic anime character; guess what? None of that matters because Twitter Indie Vtubers teams fail to understand one huge guiding principle behind Vtuber teams, Classification.
See, I think the biggest issue I saw in the way Twitter's Indie vtuber teams (god that's getting exhausting to type, is it getting exhausting to read yet) ran things, was that they HATED Corporate Vtubers. Like, they HATED them. You couldn't bring up any of them, it doesn't matter how humble or how popular or whatever. Mention Vshojo? You're the devil. Mention Hololive? You're worse than the devil.
So what's so bad about that?
Let me put it like this, what do Vshojo and Hololive have in common that the majority of Indie Vtubers on Twitter do not?
They're successful at earning a living by streaming. Simple as that, they're doing something right. What are they doing right exactly? Well I'd love to find out but I can't discuss it with anyone because if I bring up corporate vtubers it's seen as a horrible very bad no good thing to talk about. We HATE Corporate Vtubers here and if you talk about them at all you're out buster, that's that.
But wait, going back to what I was saying about Classification, why is that important? Well simply put it makes things easier to understand for the audience. It keeps things coherent and it all just makes sense.
Here's a quick example, let's look at some Vtubers and you tell me if you think you know which ones are in a team together;
One of the Vtubers is a Lion. One of the Vtubers is a Crow. One of the Vtubers is an Isekai Protagonist (Generic, no definition) One of the Vtubers is a Harem Anime Protagonist (again, generic) One of the Vtubers is a Demon. One of the Vtubers is an Angel. One of the Vtubers is a Robot. One of the Vtubers is a Starship Captain. Lastly, one of the Vtubers is a Bear.
Now if you look at these Vtubers, and you had to group them into teams; how would you do it?
Logically you might group the Isekai and Harem protagonists together, they could have a Vtuber group for generic anime protagonists and they could actually make a joke out of putting a spin on their respective tropes.
Then you could pair off the Demon and Angel, the Robot and the Captain since they're both sci fi, and lastly you could group the Lion, Crow, and Bear since they're all animals right?
Well to put it super bluntly and not try to dox myself with how much I've said in this already, none of those examples were made up. All of those are actual Vtubers I've met during my time on twitter. Fun fact: they were all in the same team. Yes, all of them. Then they split off into smaller teams because they learned the team was too big and the audience split too thin.
But why does that Classification actually matter? Well it matters for the same reason being a Vtuber in the first place matters.
You see, if you're going to be a Vtuber you need to ask yourself why you're wanting to be a Vtuber over any other type of streamer.
Seriously, give that a thought for a second.
For me it was pretty simple, it started with not wanting to put my face out there. I got generally tired of how many people would comment on how I was dressed or how my hair was that day, or the fact I have a big nose; or just... whatever they felt like saying about ME that day. I'd play a ton of games I wanted to show people, things I actually enjoyed and wanted to bring to others. Yet no one cared about what I was streaming, they were all too caught up on how I look, and how do I look? Well, extremely everyday normal person-looking.
No seriously. I am not really someone who's like, "cool" or "handsome" or whatever. I don't look striking in any noticeable way. This isn't some fishing for compliments attempt either I'm being real, there's nothing about me on a GOOD day that says "I'm worth looking at" and yet people would always comment on SOMETHING and it normally wasn't about me looking good.
However if you turn off your webcam you DO get less engagement. This is just a sort of proven thing, so you need SOMETHING to represent yourself right? For me that was an easy fix, I could use a Vtuber avatar and in doing so I figured maybe I could rep some of my Native culture while I'm at it.
Later down the line I met some cool people who were more character focused, they enjoy the idea of playing a character and ultimately growing and changing that character as they streamed. It was something I felt forced into by the Twitter community at large so I always tried to come up with SOMETHING for the character, but everything felt forced (because it was) and bad (because it was) so I would often quickly drop any characterization before it even hit the stream.
Okay so let's say you personally have the ambition of playing a character, you want something closer to Hololive or Holostars, where your character comes from a place, has an occupation; a goal, a reason for streaming beyond just "I stream because I want to make money as a streamer for whatever reason." Alright cool let's see where that goes right?
Now remember, as Twitter Indie Vtubers we HATE Corporations and we will not be looking at how Hololive does this right at all. Instead we will constantly remind people about our character without ever really doing anything with it.
Yes. This is how it was done.
Say you meet someone who was an Angel. Maybe they were an Angel who was kicked out of heaven because lol they play too many video games XD (please excuse my cringe I'm doing my best to emulate shit I actually ran into here). So okay cool I'm not going to say that's NOT a valid character I guess. Alright so they're streaming because they like playing video games, what does being an Angel have to do with anything exactly? Well they'll tell you their entire lore dump of a backstory, they'll remind you they're an Angel, and they'll likely have some kind of definition of the difference between them as an Angel who got kicked out of heaven and fallen angels who... you know, basically the same thing BUT IT'S NOT.
You might ask again, what does this have to do with ANYTHING. Why does it matter? Why does them having a backstory, having this persona; why does it matter? What are they doing with it? Is it worth all the investment in a backstory and lore; or would it simply be enough to just explain "yea I'm an Angel and that's why I look like this" or whatever?
And Again they'll remind you of their backstory, they'll explain all their lore; and you'll find that this literally DOESN'T MATTER.
But then all the big corporate vtubers have backstories and lore, so we should too right?
Well... about that.
Can we, and now listen; I know... we HATE corpo vtubers here... but can we take just a second to look at WHY they have those backstories and lore and such?
Okay so here's the thing, if we look at the Hololive English branches we can see some specific things, first off Classification is a big one.
HoloMYTH? Grim Reaper, Phoenix, Cthulhu; etc (I'm not going to explain how a Shark or literally just Watson who is somehow a time traveler fit in here ask COVER man.)
HoloCOUNCIL? Warden of Time, Basically Mother Nature, The Embodiment of Chaos; again we have characters who are the COUNCIL of things like Space, Time, Civilization, Nature, Chaos; etc.
Council would later become PROMISE but I digress.
Now I'm not honestly too sure about Advent? But that's mostly because I haven't really looked into them much admittedly they're very hit or miss with me personally, but I got nothing against them and wish them the best.
What I'm saying here is, Classification matters! Everything from theme to color schemes and names comes into play. The one in charge of Nature? Ceres (a planet) Fauna (...yea I don't need to explain how that one ties in). The Warden of Time? Literally named Kronii (obviously meant to be similar to the word Chronos and such).
A lot of this is pretty self explanatory but my point here is everyone is designed to fit together like a D&D party. Everyone feels like they belong in the team. It's not just a random Cyborg, an Angel, some random Bear, and an Isekai Protagonist all bumming out in a discord call going "oh man I have no idea what to do today so we're just chatting lol"
So if you're an Indie Vtuber who understands Classification you're likely going to look for other people who fit your general theme and identity. But this can be difficult because of either one of two reasons.
One being that no one seems to fit your general classification. If you're too unique or too specific to a setting, time period, or general genre it can be hard to find others who fit into that with any level of similarity.
The other being that TOO MANY people seem to fit your classification EXACTLY. If you're a random God of such and such, and you find other god Vtubers, you likely find other people who are literally the same thing you are. Same goes for Angels, Demons, Anything Anime, Most forms of Object Heads or Robots or Cyborgs.
The biggest problem I see with the second is that no one wants to be anything short of "the best" at what they are. You're not just an assassin, you're the best assassin to ever live; well shit now you can't be in the same team as the OTHER best assassin to ever live.
But what if you were?
See this is where I think Indie Vtubers don't have the ability to laugh at themselves nearly as much as they should.
Because I personally think it would be really funny to have two people in a vtuber team who are the same thing, but from different backgrounds. Give us Spy x Family but as a Vtuber Team and I think it would be fucking hilarious.
No seriously, imagine for a moment that there was a 5 person vtuber team, 2 of the members of the team were from different backgrounds, they could be anything; for the sake of generic bullshit let's say one is like the top Angel from heaven, the other is the top Demon from hell. Except they both seek to keep this information secret, "only their chat knows" except the other 3 people in the team are VERY much aware, for literally ANY reason it doesn't matter how they know, it just matters that these two are such stupid idiots that they're constantly showing their hand in such specific ways that the other wouldn't see.
If you have the improv skills necessary, and the ability to laugh at yourself; you suddenly have a very VERY potentially funny team on your hands.
Imagine them playing Phasmophobia, one of them (doesn't matter who) points out the ghost must be a demon, they know all this information about demons, clearly this is a demon; they wouldn't be wrong about this. The other, also knowing this information (either because they're well researched on demons, or because they ARE one) is suspicious of how they know all this and doesn't know how to call them out so they try to one up them by providing MORE information in an attempt to see how much they ACTUALLY know, only now the first person is starting to question how THEY know so much. Meanwhile everyone else in the collab is dying and neither of them acknowledge this until it's brought up as a last ditch effort out by one of the two when asked a particularly difficult to answer question and they just respond with "OH SHIT THEY'RE DYING!" Before running off to save their team members. THAT'S GOOD BANTER BAY-BEE!
But see, this requires classification, an understanding of everyone's characters; and enough similarity to play off each other's characters.
So what about if you can't find anyone? You join into a random Vtuber Team and hope for the best.
Alright so you join into a group with 4 other people, so far things seem fine, everyone is nice enough; you likely sit in a discord call and talk about life; become closer friends, discuss what kind of games you like to play. You know, general normal people stuff.
Then a few days later you get a message about doing a collab, you don't have many viewers at this point; maybe 4 - 5 regulars who show up and actively chat. Good people, you are excited to sort of introduce your audience to your new team, and get to meet their audience. You might even be a little stressed because you only have about 100 followers on twitter and they have well over 1,000 so you expect a much bigger turnout on their end.
The stream collab starts, you notice there's maybe 3 people watching them, you are one; they are another. Which means they only really have 1 viewer. You tell yourself this is because the stream just started.
Then a half hour goes by, the only viewers showing up in their chat are from your team. Mutual friends, other streamers you know; they trickle in now and then but you notice neither of you are particularly popular. That big four digit follower count seems to all be just for show. Likely coming from a basis of follow for follow vtubers and the like. Looking at their twitter you notice they don't get much interaction outside of the team there either.
This sort of puts your mind at ease, it feels more comfortable knowing you're not somehow accidentally jumping ahead to having an audience of hundreds to entertain.
That is until you begin to notice a shift in the way you're treated by your team. It's very likely you'll be asked to do more collabs, they'll absolutely swing this as it being a matter of keeping the team together; or because you're fun to be around. However during streams you'll often be put on the back burner, you'll be brought into collabs but never really engaged with. You'll never be raided by your fellow team members. This is because you have a small, but real following.
You'll find that when you're unavailable it's suddenly a big deal, you'll see words like "mandatory" or "regularly scheduled" popping up to make it seem like you SHOULD be there, it's part of being in a team. You'll be told to "act professional" if you have a disagreement with someone, whether this is over something like gender, sexuality, or even other basic respect issues. You'll be asked to stream with people you don't like.
When it comes down to it, if you show opposition; you'll be told that the majority of the team disagrees with you, but they won't want you gone. They won't oust you from the team, because they know your audience will still most likely follow you out. They don't want that.
So they'll keep you around as long as possible, until you make too much noise; or say something they don't agree with a little too loudly. Once they believe they've done enough collabs, and gotten enough of your followers to follow them; they'll kick you aside and find someone else to do this to.
They will even turn on each other; I've gotten messages from people, months and even sometimes years after leaving a team. These messages all say similar things; they always start with an apology; and then go into talking about how they were either too naive, too scared, or just too confused to understand the manipulation and crowd mentality they were being indoctrinated to.
The key reason behind all of this is because you are never actually a valued friend, you're an additional audience member; you're a viewer, who has more viewers to bring to the table.
But clearly that was just a bad team, they're not all like that; that's true; that's genuine. So you go back to the drawing board and put it out there that you're in the market for another team, probably a bit more picky this time than you were last time to be fair. I couldn't blame anyone for being such after going through something like that.
You'll find another small group of people who don't know each other, who don't have anything in common other than a want to be successful; and likely who are willing to throw the weakest link under the bus to replace them with a fresh set of eyes and a new audience to grow their follower count.
But what happens if it DOES work out? What about when it's made by friends? What about when the people streaming don't actually hate each other?
Well then you still have to contend with burnout, with setting up times to stream together; with the sheer amount of work it is to work as a singular unit rather than as a "stream whenever you want" solo vtuber.
This can be difficult for some people. I remember having times when we'd plan group collabs and then my chronic pain would act up and I couldn't make it. Some would make it out to be a big deal, others would be understanding; either way it was a bit of a let down. Then you'd have the issue of not just everyone having the same games but the same interest in playing them at the same time. Then you'd have issues with if someone is getting more popular, or if there's a difference in ideas for how the group should be handling things.
At what point is it a team and not just a group of friends?
So alright, what do I think? Personally?
I think if you want to have a success vtuber team you should find some method of Classification; even if it's really weird and out there. Give us something to unify you all to the same group. Then you should decide on whether or not as a whole you're a character driven group or a streamer driven group:
Character Driven = investing in the characterization of your avatars, the in character interactions they may have; the "story" or "plot" that exists around them being a key feature of the streams.
Streamer Driven = investing in the streamer behind the characters, the connections of the individuals, their audiences; and the games they play.
Think Hololive vs Jerma.
Jerma doesn't have an anime he uses to explain his more characteristic properties of himself, because he doesn't really need that in order to come out on a stream and go "hey guys it's me, Jerma; the funny white dude on the internet." He can just do that and you already kinda get it because he's invested a lot in you knowing who JERMA is.
Meanwhile every Hololive stream opens with a catch phrase or a sort of characterized opening. Some more elaborate than others; and some even going so far as to call out their generation/team. They DO have an anime, and various other productions that run alongside the streams that serve to amplify them as characters, and even their inside jokes and developments within streams will loop back around to becoming elements of their anime counterparts.
So, once you've figured that out it's not really too difficult.
As long as you're willing to grow as a unit and pick each other up when someone gets ahead, without feeling a need to stab each other in the back or throw each other under the bus; you're solid.
If you're character focused, I strongly recommend you focus on your extended universe, explain to me who your characters are not by taking time out of the stream to stare me in the eyes and say "my character is blah blah blah" but by SHOWING ME through bumpers, skits, or other media. Make comics, make short video bumpers and tiktoks or something I don't care. Just don't sit there on stream EXPLAINING shit at me, because trust me I will tune out I do not care it is not an interesting way to convey who and what you are.
If you're character focused I need you to prioritize SHOW don't TELL.
If you're Streamer focused then I think you have it a lot easier, because you can prioritize getting to better know your audience, their preferences for streams/collabs, and you can get to know each other and use the information above to best sort out who should be pairing off for the best experiences for both you as a streamer and your audience as viewers.
I do believe these two things can mix well.
If you want a really solid example of EXACTLY what I mean, look no further than my (streamer focused) interaction with Nea (character focused)
A lot of the time our interactions work just fine because she understands that I am a streamer before I'm a character, and meanwhile I'll comment on her being an Ice Cream Lion before ever bringing up who she is outside of streams (at least while on streams, we're good friends outside of streams and I know her as her obviously). We're not in a team together but we collab plenty and consider each other to be good friends. We do our best to help one another get ahead in very casual ways and don't seek to bring each other down because we don't hold jealousy or envy towards one another's followings.
And yes, it REALLY is that simple to get along.
The core problem with Twitter's Indie Vtuber scene is that drama and bullshit gets attention and they crave attention over long-term proper collaboration and friendship. I don't doubt for a second that if Nea ever hit it big time and became a full time streamer she wouldn't hesitate or shy away from streaming with me and collabing with me all the same and you better believe that I'd be the exact same.
I used to often talk about applying to corporate vtuber agencies and I always said that if I was to ever get accepted I'd fight tooth and nail to be able to collab with my friends in hopes of getting them in front of the audience they deserve to have.
But yea that's it, that's the big keys to successful Vtuber team right there;
Classification helps a TON.
Be good to one another, don't allow yourself to succumb to the jealousy and envy of seeing one of your friends and team members gaining popularity faster than you.
Actually being good friends does help a lot too.
Actively support one another.
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about the parallels between derby and bif / achilles and patroclus.
first of all, i need to warn you- if you have read the song of achilles, delete it from your brain. forget about it forever you can rest now it was all a bad dream. know that both their personalities and their dynamics were simplified and stripped of all their cultural significance, reducing them to a hormonal-thirteen-years-olds-wattpad-fanfiction-from-2012 kind of story that fucking irks me as a classic lits student. with all due respect to thirteen year olds writing fanfic on wattpad in 2012.
so, the thing about them. achilles is the strongest warrior of the greeks, just him deciding not to partake in the war is a decisive hit for the army; just one nod of his is enough to decide the entire fate of his companions. but also, he's driven by blind pride, personal gain, an archaic and profound sense of honor. except that, you know- this is much more natural of a mindset than it might seem, because it's a very part of the societal and cultural structure these warriors live in. it is a value that's passed on within generation and that any sane citizen would've had, it was the mentality of the ruling class and the contrary would've been an anomaly. (if ur interested in this aspect: see archilocus' shield)
i think it's already easy to notice how this parallels some of the very core aspects of the preps' context and derby in particular. every action, their very existence is a matter of honor and reputation; for derby in particular, the leader, the one who always calls the shots, and when he wants something there's no one stopping him, not even his own clique. he will have what he wants, and if just one small offense is done to him, it's everyone's fault, and nothing will get better unless the cut is mended.
and then there's patroclus. older, wiser. he's not as powerful as achilles, but he's a level-minded, resistant and skilled warrior, favored by the gods. that's mostly what i hate about what madeline miller did to him, trying to make him into a relatable, pacifist softboy- he's one of the greatest warriors of the army, respected and recognized by all. he's perfectly capable of standing up on his own and fighting without achilles, basically massacring an entire army; if apollo didn't intervene, he would have won against hector change my mind
the thing about them, though, is that... they're still stronger together. a warrior's arms were a sacred thing, so when patroclus wears achille's armor is much more than a simple impersonation. they re exchanging power, almost blending into each other, and patroclus fights with his own and achilles' power. do you see the parallel there?
derby is of course a great leader, and bif is a powerful fighter on his own; but when you put them together they become unbeatable, a force of nature that is born from the union of them.
and also!! one of my favorite scenes from the iliad is one where we see achilles, in his tent, playing the lyre, while patroclus sits in front of him. for one: sitting in front of each other was a gesture of great intimacy, almost symbolic. two: this is almost a contradiction with what we said about achilles before. he is a demigod, but here and now, playing sad music, sitting in front of patroclus, he becomes human.
and that's the thing about derby and bif, that in their life they're expected to uphold aristocratic values, to never show any trace of imperfections or flaws. that their pride and reputation, as they have been told their whole lives, is essential, and they have nothing without it. and yet, when they are together, they just let that superhuman mask fall, and they can just be fragile, emotional, they can have a heart beating and flesh and blood and they can love. when they're together they are human again
tad and peanut / romeo and juliet | bryce and chad / cupid and psyche
#i know i dont talk abotu them often but im very passionate abt this oay#like i truly really love the iliad lmao. so realizing the comaprisons made me all the most emotional#canis canem edit#bully#bully scholarship edition#preps#derby harrington#bif taylor#derbif#odyposts#odywrites
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hii sorry if this is too venty or depressing or whatever but i really need help
ive been in a qpr with my partner nagisa for like 3 months (weve been friends before that for a few years) and i love him so much ive never wanted anyone in my life more than him. but i am deathly afraid of being a bad partner, and i am even more afraid of him leaving me for someone else even though i know thats not realistic.
he asked one of our ex friends if he could complain to them about something in private and for the rest of the day i felt anxious and sick and guilty like i just killed someone. i cut this friend off mainly because i was so jealous and spiteful (didnt say that tho i feel guilty) (also he was a really shitty person and made me really uncomfortable but it was mainly cuz i was jealous)
whenever im not talking to him my brain shouts to me that im ignoring him and im a horrible cold monster who just has him as a battery to feed my sick desires or whatever the hell that thing tells me at night. whenever i talk to him too much my brain shouts that i look desperate and clingy and i am annoying him hes probably sleeping! but it hurts less than feeling cold. so thats why i try to text him as much as possible. it almost feels like a compulsion, that im not actually texting him because i care and im talking to him so i personally dont feel like shit (ok that made me feel awful to type out but Fuck whatever)
i am not a bad person i really love my partner ive never loved anyone more than him hes the only person i really connect with on a deep level anymore and i think we genuinely have some sort of spiritual bond because of how often we share the same emotions and think the same thoughts at the same time. but i dont really believe in spirituality shit so whatever
he actually has the same issue (but seems to have figured it out better than me) with me and my friend, and it actually made me hate myself so much i have stopped talking to that friend because i dont want him to feel any percent of what i do. when he isn’t there to talk to me i feel alone and abandonded and like my arms have been cut off and like im living without a 3rd dimension. i feel like a normal person when im with him. he is the only thing keeping me sane. i would drop all my friends if he wanted me to
whenever im not talking to him i feel like im neglecting a bird in a cage even though i know he doesn’t need me that much
whats funny is that i dont worry about being a bad person in any other aspect of my life i literally do not give a fuck whether im a bad person because i always justify everything i do in my mind and i cant find a single bad thing ive done. other than the intentionally bad shit i did, of course, i did that stuff to kinda.. give myself something to feel bad for and so i dont feel like im fully a perfect person? hard to put into words
so yeah i guess you get the point! i really need some sort of advice. ive told him this but not really the full extent behind it, just the jealousy and vague mentions of the fear of being bad. i am worried that my anxiety of being a bad partner is leading me to be a bad partner
damn... okay i don't know a lot about this but it sounds like you might be developing a codependency. you should definitely communicate all of this to your partner so you can work together to lessen your anxiety. you also should probably go to therapy but i don't know if that is accessible to you right now. i'm sorry i don't have much else to say but hopefully someone in the replies can also help
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so what did you think of each of the roy sibs ending?
I think it was a great finale and while there were twists and turns I didn't expect, I feel like it was totally right for all of them.
Kendall--Right NOW, I'm ending on a pessimistic vibe for Kendall wherein I agree with Jesse that this is the defining event in his life that he'll never get over... I don't see Kendall being a good, like... father. I don't see him being a whole person. I see him as being less of a destructive force than his father (simply because, though I imagine that someone with his wealth and connections will build something again, it will never be on a Waystar level) but I don't think he'll ever be happy and recognize the freedom he has been given for what it is. Kendall wants to be shackled.
[insert my "the Roy siblings would all be a lot better off if they just channeled their intense emotional issues into safe, sane, and consensual kink (not with each other)" spiel]
I also think the fact that Kendall was willing to throw out the one thing that haunted his conscience since season 1, the one thing that brought true empathy from his siblings (the cater waiter thing) in exchange for Waystar... That is why I don't think he's going to get over this for a looong time, if ever. He was willing to sacrifice everything for this; he did; and he lost.
Roman--I mean, I think a lot of people are gonna go into the baby Romey stuff, and I won't excuse Kendall getting physical with him. in the hug.... But lol, I do think we can all say we wouldn't lose our shit over someone saying our non-bio kids aren't "real bloodline"... and then we'd lose our shit. Do I think that was ALL about the kids for Kendall? No, of course not. But that is a *hell* of a trigger. And yes, for sure there's some ugly Logan-fostered macho shit going on there (I interpreted that dialogue as Sophie being adopted and Iverson being biologically Rava's but conceived with a sperm donor because Kendall is infertile) but also... those are his kids, man. And frankly I think the fact that Roman clearly agreed with Logan on that is the 50 billionth dog whistle about Roman's core political leanings that he TRULY believes in that we've gotten since s3. The guy who said the "blacks and the Jews" line now caring a good bit about "true Roy blood"????
I also feel like Roman is just not gonna work and idly waste away in his millions, never able to be honest about his sexuality, his desires, or his trauma in a straightforward way. He will never be able to have a healthy relationship.
Shiv--The tragedy of Shiv is that she became her mother, and I did see a lot of that coming, and I don't agree with the "this is anti-feminist" takes because a) Shiv has always been complicit to acts of extreme misogyny, so it makes sense that she'd fall prey to it b) I think the point that the show was trying to make is that even if Shiv was fit to be CEO (she wasn't) she still wouldn't be selected because of this culture of extreme misogyny that is Waystar.
I think that in the end, Shiv does have a sick love for Tom, and the shock of him being the potential CEO rocked her and put her in a place where she was like "it's going to be HIM???" And she both wanted to be with him, tbh, if he was going to lead anyway... and could justify her desire to be with him as a strategic move while receiving validation from him (because Shiv is so desperate for male validation, always). Shiv couldn't handle the idea of Kendall being CEO because at the end of the day, the siblings view that seat in a very childish way. Kendall with his "I'm the eldest boy", Roman with the "but why couldn't it be me" as if it's just something you get because it's there, and Shiv with the points system of fairness in her head.
So it makes sense that in the end, someone who had far less emotional stake in it (who perhaps began with more but had that whittled away over the series) like Tom would "win". Tom didn't need to be a sole ruler--he was willing to compromise with Matsson because it served his purpose and got him power he can use another day, maybe. Tom registering Matsson wanting to fuck Shiv with clear anger, then brushing it aside for his goals, when s1 Tom was devastated when she cheated, when her sleeping with other people has always been such a huge crisis for him... chilling. But that's why he won.
Also, the reality is that Logan was right about none of the kids being able to rule the company (Kendall has the business training but emotionally he could never distance himself enough to be truly rational over it) but the issue is that this was HIS FAULT LOL. He never wanted them to be on his level. He wanted to lord over them. And he was upset when the people he designed to fail... failed. Something Kendall basically pointed out in s1.
So Logan created this company that in theory should've been a family legacy, but ultimately began and ended with him, because he couldn't bear to share it. And I think that's such good writing.
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A Note On... Dodgeball School!
Dodgeball Academia is an RPG dodgeball game by Pocket Trap! Be the best baller at school!
I wasn't expecting too much from this game, tbh. I thought it would be a funny little in-between game, but entertaining enough while I'm busy with life things. and while I did get that, it's worth a little more than just a funny little game.
there's some challenge to playing Dodgeball in the school, and I appreciated it until I busted the game open by failing at the underground challenge like 50-something times (and thereby farming hundred of Bollars in prize money). of course, a sane person would use that money to buy new equipment or level up their character, but I mostly used it on strength increases. eventually I was doing 50 on regular throws, 80+ on throws from centre court, and 180 on crits. even then, the final few battles weren't a breeze, and I'd probably steer clear of that underground tournament (1v5 is not manageable on a regular basis)
the writing in this game is pretty good. handles some cool topics throughout the arcs. there's tons of funny moments in the game, though sometimes the humour missed. it was however funny that a character has the same name as a friend.
my favourite characters throughout were unsurprisingly Boris, Suneko, and Kyabo. they've all got really solid characterizations. and with Boris being a feature in a lot of the game, we see a lot of how he reacts in different situations. very cool
I thought the graphics in the game were solid. it does that 2D sprites in a 3D environment thing, which worked out pretty well. both the character design and the locations were distinct. plus the character had some cool idle/narrative animations during cutscenes.
Dodgeball Academia is a solid, short RPG where you always try your best and dodge some balls.
As Always,
Enjoy Gaming!
#ink reviews#game review#video games#gaming#a note on...#Dodgeball Academia#I'm gonna start to add a couple more screenshots to these short-form reviews when possible#just to make it a little more visual
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Headcanon: Lake Spirit Characterizations
(This is the result of probably way too much overthinking and following various fridge logic rabbit holes for the purpose of a series of fics about the edges of the setting)
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Arceus spoke then and said “Humans. They are the pinnacle of all Creation.”
The Being of Willpower proclaimed: “They hold the greatest capacity for willpower of any mortal species. Their drives to succeed may allow them to overcome any obstacle.”
The Being of Emotion rejoiced: “Their range of emotions is second to none! Their ability to form many lasting bonds may allow them levels of teamwork never seen before.”
The Being of Knowledge was silent for a moment, as was its nature. Then, with calm deliberation, it articulated: They hold great ingenuity. With their intelligence, they will one day become the masters of this world.
They all looked at Uxie then, aghast. “What!?” Demanded Arceus. The master of memories replied only: “It is an observation of the range of abilities they will learn.” This mollified the Original One, who nodded in understanding.
~~~~~
As far as the lake trio is concerned, humanity (or sapient life in general for PMD settings) is collectively the crown jewel of the universe. They regard themselves as benevolent guardians and maintainers of the universe (and Sinnoh in particular). But their definition of `benevolent’ may not always line up with our definition.
The Lake Trio’s mindsets should be somewhat alien and inhuman. Aside from being Pokémon rather than humans, they are (depending on one’s interpretation) primordial spirits/deities/etc embodying and mediating (in the same way that bosonic fields mediate the fundamental forces of nature) certain facets of the mind. As such, their views on issues such as life/death and good/evil should not necessarily line up with what humans may view as sane/benevolent (no matter how benevolent the three try to be). We can go more in detail for each.
Azelf
As far as Azelf is concerned, the more willpower/determination/etc a being has, the more alive they are; Life is good thus the more willpower/determination/etc a being has, the better.
>(“What do you call a being that lacks any willpower at all? Dead. Inanimate.”)
>Regards its ability to strip someone of all willpower to be potentially the harshest ironic punishment it can give to a wrongdoer - essentially all-but dead and trapped perhaps desiring to fully die but unable to see it through
Supremely stubborn. Willpower is about sticking to a course once a decision has been made.
Generally highly favors anyone determined to achieve nigh impossible goals. Especially if it is a benevolent goal or - perhaps even better, if the only reason for trying to achieve one’s goal is to be able to say that one was determined enough to succeed at it (ex: mountain climbing, speed running, trying to become a Pokémon Master, etc). That said, Azelf does not always pay attention to what the determined person’s decisions and goals are. To paraphrase: ‘That’s not my department.’
>Also, courageous heroes in general.
>Imagine the personification of every training montage scene ever made, is the personality we're going for here. Alternatively, Kamina (See: "We brawlers are sustained by willpower! Even when mocked as reckless and crazy!"/"Kick reason to the curb and surpass the impossible!")
To extend the previous metaphor: generally of the opinion that you doing something after a training montage to prepare for it is better than not doing something after not having a training montage, whatever it is you're doing.
Accordingly, does not entirely comprehend the idea that willful (and/or premeditated) crimes can be inherently wrong/immoral - or at least more so than if the crime was accidental. (The logic roughly being that one who is determined enough to achieve a desired result is more mentally healthy -and thus alive - than they would be if they just gave up.)
>May or may not have noticed a bonfire of willpower growing up in nearby Sunnyshore, and may or may not have psychically stoked that human’s determination without bothering to find out who the person was or what he inevitability became determined to do. Oops.
Similarly, basically thoroughly subscribes to Green Lantern Theory. (If, after the events in Sinnoh with Team Galactic probably prove Azelf definitively exists and lives in its lake, then in the scenario where Azelf starts paying close attention to contemporary human culture (due to religious offerings or more frequent interaction with humans on more than an abstract level? Depends on which canon, really) and some kind of fictional ‘Green Lanturn’ comic exists which Azelf finds out about, there’s a non-insignificant chance of Azelf decorating its home with merchandise of such)
Is almost convinced that Uxie is aware of everything on a more than abstract level. Given the above, Azelf would be more pissed at Uxie than Team Galactic itself following the events at Mt Coronet.
>“Uxie almost certainly knew of Team Galactic’s plans. And it did nothing to stop them beforehand. Nothing! Did Uxie want events to play out as they did? At least Team Galactic had a goal and was determined to see it though. That my lake was bombed and we were captured and mutilated meant that their will to do so outstripped my will to stop them. And when they with their strong-willed leader were in turn defeated at Spear Pillar by mortal heroes with our assistance, they were less determined to destroy this universe than we were to preserve it. Proof that in the end, the will to help and protect will always be greater than the will to annihilate - and the end of a long and challenging journey that gave those righteous heroes the opportunity to grow in their courage and determination to succeed …..Perhaps it was good that this occurred, and Uxie acted correctly after all.”
Thinks the human profession of helping people recognize and willpower away their emotions (or pain or logic or…) is one of the greatest achievements of humanity.
Insofar as Azelf regards conflict as a test of opposing wills, regards Tapu Koko as a sort of Protégé.
>In anime canon, this is likely how Tapu Koko knew about Ash in advance. Lots of telepathic raving about this absolutely most amazing human, and how Tapu Koko would agree if it met him, followed by forewarning that he's coming to Alola.
Aside from Psychic type, thinks the best type is Fighting (or perhaps Dark?).
Mesprit
As far as Mesprit is concerned, it is the capability for emotions -the phenomenon that enables decision-making - that distinguishes between someone who is alive from one who merely exists. Generally, individuals feeling positive emotions or making decisions that lead to positive emotions is preferable to negative emotions or decisions that lead to negative emotions. Both are preferable to feeling no emotions at all.
As such, regards the act of removing this capability to be the harshest and cruelest punishment it can execute. After all, Apathy is Death.
Favors those with great empathy or compassion or who are generally strongly emotional. Those with great skill in the power of friendship are loved by Mesprit
In some sense, it is the most benevolent of the three. Mercy and compassion and the need for justice are emotions, after all, and feel good, and acting on them makes others feel good.
In a similar sense, could potentially be regarded as the cruelest/most petty of the three. Negative emotions are also strong weights in decision-making. Further, while highly personal negative actions targeting others (or at least those who aren’t currently experiencing any emotions for reasons Mesprit isn’t personally responsible for) may not make them feel good, they will instigate some emotional response.
Doesn’t fully comprehend how the phrase ‘crime of passion’ isn’t a paradox, or why acts categorized as such would be considered immoral. Passion is a net good, isn’t it? And decisions made off strong emotions mean that the decision tree is operating properly, right? Would it really be better for someone not to be capable of feeling whatever instigating emotion is responsible?
Personality-wise, think ‘faery’ from the Seelie Court, with bits of 'benevolent Disney fairy'. Generally helpful whimsical being which can be cruel when sufficiently angered. One guess which (non-Psychic?) type is its favorite.
The events in Sinnoh lead to the hero from Twinleaf Town becoming regarded by Mesprit as its favorite human.
>If Anime canon, or at least if the hero from Twinleaf doesn’t catch (or decides to release) Mesprit, the fact that Twinleaf is so close to its home means it may frequently visit the human after the latter has returned home. Those who threaten (let alone hurt) this human should be afraid of cruel and unusual punishments. Very afraid.
Thinks the human professions which involve instigating strong emotions in an audience are among the greatest achievements of humanity. Similarly, that humans have such expansive monkeyspheres makes us the most wonderful beings to ever exist.
Uxie
Uxie knows.
Uxie’s description of its guiding worldview, if asked (or perhaps one of its siblings’ answers in speaking what they believe Uxie would say), might be thus: “It is memory, the attainment and retainment of knowledge, that makes sentience, let alone sapience, possible. Without it, decisions cannot be made nor acted upon reliably, nor can the results be evaluated for future decisions to act upon. Without the capacity for it, a being can - even if technically alive - be little more than part of the landscape. It allows not just for continuity of the Individual, but for growth and change. It is the general preservation of the sense-making tool which is most important, for in a very real sense a person who loses it ceases to be.”
>If asked about its ability to make people forget things, and why it doesn't find the act morally objectionable given its worldview, it would likely respond that "There are times when forgetting is for the best."
There are few who remember how, early on, Uxie was once a smug (telepathically) talkative know-it-all. No one remembers what caused this to no longer be the case.
It is not exactly the nature of memory to take an active role in the mind like emotions and willpower do. Memory is generally a passive support structure. Uxie is no different. The Being of Knowledge is usually quiet now: it sits in the background, sharing information when and where, and how it deems necessary. To those familiar with it or simply psychic, a smug sense of “I know something you don’t” is noticeable when Uxie provides information, even to this day.
Uxie understands human notions of right and wrong, good and evil. It is the purpose of memory to understand, to know. Memory’s job is sense-making. Memory is what our reason is based upon. If you can't trust your own memory, what can you trust? As we all know, we can always 100% trust our memory not to lie to us for the greater good of preserving sanity. Uxie is the embodiment and mediator of memory and sense-making for this universe. Why should Uxie be any different?
A memory lacking in knowledge would not be good at its job as a sense-making apparatus, and with great knowledge comes great responsibility. Uxie’s personal agenda has always been to fulfill its role in the universe as best as possible. By whatever means necessary.
An odd quirk no one ever seems to notice: If Uxie's telepathic messages were written down in text form, it is almost only the case that a "?" would ever appear when quizzing another being for their own benefit. Even messages that appear to be questions would generally end with a period. Fortunately, for the sanity of others, no one has had the intuition to cross-reference the other cases to find a pattern.
Uxie Knows.
One’s sense-making apparatus occasionally supplies information (memories retained or new deductions) entirely unprompted. This is the case where Uxie is concerned too, for its peers.
>That Uxie’s observations are occasionally noted to be highly prescient in hindsight to a level that seems beyond the abstract awareness one might expect from it has long since stopped being more than barely unnerving.
>Occasions of unexpected reminders or serendipity can alter the course of lives and shape history. If asked, Uxie would state about history: “The course of history has brought this world to what is now, with few exceptions, almost utopia.”
If asked which type is it's favorite (perhaps by an interviewer following the defeat of Team Galactic?), A likely reply would be this: “You intended to mean other than Psychic. In truth, my answer would be the same either way. Every type is accompanied by some intrinsic specialty. Something specific to the type that makes it in some way supernatural. All except one. The Normal type has nothing special. No intrinsic advantage, and one intrinsic weakness. Species and moves of that type persist and thrive anyway because they are more adaptable, their techniques more advanced, and ever more innovative. The lack of any intrinsic strength has necessitated adapting to possess a more highly versatile range of extrinsic strengths and tools than any other type. It is something clearly reflected in humanity itself, the most highly innovative and successful species of them all. Of course, humanity still has supernatural powers at their command - if generally indirectly via allied Pokémon. In a fully mundane universe, one might speculate what humanity might have achieved without us. Could they even invent entire worlds? Perhaps, if Pokémon did not exist, humans would need to invent us. ”
UXIE KNOWS
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ive already decided all the weapons for the bkids but i am unsure if i should go for 5thgen ONLY for the specifics or just . EVERY MH GAME which would defintieyl expand my options a bit but theres like........ 500 MILLION Monstesr and therefore 500 M IL L IO N AR MOR SE TS and i wouldnt know whatto choose :(
but for the bkids weapons:
egbert: hammer. duh! don’t think i really need to explain this one, but shes the type to go utterly berserk once the monster’s been downed from a stun. has cleared the entire area of mizutsune, theyre all too afraid to fight her (hehe.. me) she lands a LOT of ko’s and is infinitely frustrated by the fact that you need to SHARPEN a HAMMER. WHO NEEDS TO SHARPEN A HAMMER??! ITS A HAMMER GOD DAMNIT
dave: longsword. again, duh! dont think i really need to explain this! anime loser boy, it feels appropriate. he’s the type to waste his gauge on helmbreaker in world and didnt learn till iceborne that theres more than one charge level on it. i haven’t played longsword much so i wouldn’t know a lot of the specifics but i think he would deliberately always go hit the head just to knock everyone else over cause hes a bitch like that :heart:
rose: this one is really tough, im stuck between dualblades, cb, and ig, but i think i have to go for db!
come on. shes totes a db user.
funnily enough she reminds me a lot of the stealth dango dualblades in rise ! i would say she’d use those but i have a feeling she would think they’re too silly.
again i havent played much of dualblades but i think she would be one of the More Sane dualblade players, she doesn’t roll down the backs of monsters that often and makes sure she gets the ACTUAL most damage out of an attack rather than doing whats cool (same thing with IG cause i know aerial attacks aren’t that powerful! atleast from what ive heard)
jade: lbg and hbg! but dabbles in other weapons (especially hunting horn) as well. she’s one of those insane motherfuckers that sets down an affinity booster and goes ham. decimates the monster in 10 seconds flat then carves like nothing happened. great to grind with, but when you’re really just trying to have fun i feel like she would end up going too fast
anddd for the alpha kids cause i just thought of them
jane: gunlance or greatsword! gunlance is known for poking and.. i guess that’s like forkkind? i LOOOVE gunlance and even though im not really good at it its very fun to play and it reminds me of jane :D AND GREATSWORD!!!!!!!!! it feels like almost every greatsword user (except me im not cool) is either SUPER DERANGED or SUPER CHILL or like... BOTH but not in themiddle. like a combination AND SHE TOTALLY FEELS LIKE IT. she would fucking KILL with strongarm stance in sunbreak she is the one person in the hunt to land SO MANY KO’S AND PARTBREAKS that it honestly becomes concerning. takes a long time to charge up (she thinks focus is an un necessary skill) but its always worth the wait!
dirk: again with the anime longsword boy. except he’s like..really good atit unlike dave. hes pretty humble about it for the most part but GOD FUCKING FORBID he knocks anyone over (which he does) (alot) . he never says anything but anytime theyre all grinding for decor he is telepathically urging them all to get flinch free just so he wont screw up their attacks. his favorite monster is scorned magnamalo and i should kill him for that but i wont. im nice
jake: hmm hes a toughie! i’m stuck between lance and sns (bowguns go without saying duh) lance is totally a Page weapon but sns is a Jake weapon...... maybe he switches between the two who knows! he tends to over-judge a monsters attack and block too early or too late half of the time and is a corner healer (i think thats the term. the people that huddle off into the corner to heal from an attack while everyone else is in the middle of the battle) but he means well! he does a pretty decent amount of damage but most of his skills are health/defense oriented and he DEFINITELY has earplugs.
Roxy: SWAXE, INSECT GLAIVE OR LIGHT BOWGUN. she hasd so many fucking mods i think either her pc blew up 3 times or she got banned from multiplayer even tho im p sure mods r allowed in multi . shes specil. she totally got introduced to the series via stories 2 and is the MOST into it out of everyone else on this list. she probably knows how to hunt in every single weapon but just so she isnt flexing she only plays swaxe and ig most of the time.......... she is SUUUPER fun to hunt with
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Agent H's Book Reactions
Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Titan's Curse by Rick Riordan
Percy joins a dangerous quest to find the missing Annabeth and goddess Artemis only to discover the end of the world may be sooner than he thought.
I was totally sane yesterday, why do these books make me so insane
I was wondering why exactly we all love Percy so much. And maybe part of it is that he feels so real. He's an underdog always fighting to be valued, his flaws are on full display. He acts the way we would in the situation. Yeah, he's funny and can be goofy, but he's also someone who's been through shit and is very serious and grounded and is just trying to find his place in the world...like a lot of kids feel. AND THEN, there's the fact he's just such a genuinely good person. Like he always befriends the loner kids, does nice things for people because they ask him to, sacrifices himself over and over his friends. He has such a good heart, he's someone I think we'd all want to be friends with
The fandom is also right in that he's also a sarcastic shit who really does just talk back to the gods
I'm thinking about Percy's fatal flaw (which is identified for the first time in this book) vs Bianca's death. Like, Nico telling him he broke his promise to protect her is about the worst thing you could ever tell Percy. Did I want him to put up more of fight against her taking down Talos? Would he have if they were closer? Does this decision effect later decisions? Idk, I'm just thinking thoughts.
Continuing my point about Percy's Hero's Journey, this book obviously reflects Hercule's story with the Nemean Lion, Erymanthian Boar, Ladon and the Golden Apples, and Atlas. Hercules is THE Greek hero, and that's why it's important in Percy's journey that he rejects Hercule's path (and the path of previous heroes in general) and decide to forge a path of his own
Which leads me to my next point. This book's themes is about how being a hero is not about doing it on your own, your own ego, or your own needs. It's about love and friendship and family and that is what is going to save the world. At the beginning fo the book, Percy is failing a lot, trying to do things on his own. He's jealous of Thalia and the others. But what Percy excels at is saving his friends, working together, leading. He becomes the bait for the skeleton soldiers to save his friends. He puts himself in danger constantly and comes up with solutions to protect his friends. He cares for his friends' feelings. He protects Bessie. He sacrifices himself and chooses to be the child of the prophecy to protect Nico. This is what Percy is best at. This is the kind of hero he is
Perceabeth has a fanatastic explanation on how this book is about love (Sally and Paul, Annabeth and Percy, Dionysus and Ariadne, Zoe and Hercules) and I love it so very much and agree
Continuing my point about the five-book arc: This book is definitely the turning point. Percy's comfortable with the mythical world, his skills, his powers now, and now he has to push himself in new ways, esp emotionally and mentally, to level up. We also see the pieces on the chessboard, Thalia, Nico, Bessie, Mount Tam are clashing together for the first time and creating repercussions. We're still a bit away from the final showdown, but we can see the battle on the horizon. This book is so much more serious and signals what's to come next
I really love how Aphrodite is used here to explore Percy and Ananbeth's growing relationship. Like Percy/the writing are not the type to sit and wax about feelings. Instead we see the Hunters representing the anxiety about their relationship as they grow up. The scarf of Aphrodite showing how much Annabeth thinks about him as he does her. Aphrodite interrupting the quest to call out Percy on why he's really doing this. Aphrodite calling it what it is, a love story.
I mean, Bianca's death is devastating, but I do really like how it's because of an act of love, you know? Like even if she doesn't want the responsibilities of taking care of Nico, she of course loves him . She takes the Hades figurine, knowing she shouldn't, because she loves him and wants him to be happy. I just...I can't fault her
So, I'm not sure how much we talk about this, but I think prophecies will always be fulfilled but they can be fulfilled in multiple ways. Like, there's different ways the "land without rain" gets applied and there's different people who's parent tries to kill them, and it's because of them trying to reason with the prophecy, even prevent it, that the events happen the way they do
In other news, I think this book has the most Olympians introduced to us? Apollo, Artemis, Athena, and Aphrodite
My favorite cover of the series (maybe along w/ TLT). It's an understated scene, but it's the scene directly tying to the theme of the book. Mr. D is calling Percy out for being like all the other heroes, and Percy must now decide if he will be or won't
My current ranking of the series: TLO>TTC>TLT>BOTL (I decided I should be nicer to it)>SOM
The battle at Camp Half Blood is foreshadowed here, and I never caught that!! They said the first step was to take out the heroes!!!
In terms of awe factor, these books have held up over the years very well. However, as a kid, having the cabin counselor meeting in the Big House around the ping pong table was so cool and all, and now as an adult, I'm like...someone get these kids a decent table and snacks lol
To answer my previous post's question, Tyson's shield does come back into play! And there's a reason I don't remember it here!
Book 2 has so many iconic scenes, but I think a lot of personal favorites are in this one, including: the Erymanthian Boar, Nereus, Hoover Dam, Smithsonian
My personal favorite scene is him choosing the prophecy for himself (imo, the book should've ended with that as the cliffhanger but I digress) because the amount of courage and love Percy has to do that is incredible. Close second is the reveal of Nico as the son of Hades. Like, I think I'm so used to him being the son of Hades now, that I forgot HOW BATSHIT INSANE THIS REVEAL WAS
I know we learn what Clarisse found on her secret mission, but I don't remember what it is (Also shoutout to PJO Riordan bc I have so much faith that the little references he drops do matter, whereas in the latter series I read, I don't have that same confidence)
Speaking of reference, Nico talks about resurrecting the dead early on, ooohhh~
Percy Jackson bought a toy rat from a rundown store in a rundown town in the middle of nowhere in the middle of a very dangerous quest just because he felt bad for the store clerk, and that is why he is better than all of us
#pjo#percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#the titan's curse#ttc#agent book reactions#agent h#book review#ya book review#the only reason I am not more insane about bts is bc I’m already insane about my number one boy Percy Jackson#I accurately spotted BOTL in 2-second bg shot of Abbott Elementary (Zoo Balloon) that's how insane I am
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A shipping trope I’ve noticed
So no two ships are ever exactly the same as they come from different fandoms, different levels of canonness, different levels of toxicity, and all that shit. But there are definitely tropes. Like certain types of characters that are often shipped together.
There’s one in particular that I have decided to try to emulate in my own original work, because I personally believe it to be the most fun and I’ve never seen a lesbian version of it done. It’s always two guys or a girl and a guy, never two girls.
This trope is one that I feel goes unnoticed by most people despite the fact that it’s usually like THE ship of the fandom it’s from. I’ve only ever seen it handled in a way I truly liked once. And that was because unlike in most cases the creator himself had some level of belief in the ship but intentionally left it ambiguous rather than it just being the fans who decided it should be this way putting in all the leg work themselves to build the ship from the ground up and neglecting canon details such as how the characters actually interacted meaning it would probably be toxic.
I like to call this ship the “Lovable Psychopaths” trope.
A basic rundown of what it is, is we got as usual, two characters, a usually very dark setting and plot although this isn’t entirely required, as well as usually some very amoral cast members, but again, not required.
One of these two characters is a complete fucking lunatic. Very outwardly so. Maybe not right away, but they show their cards pretty fast if it’s not literally one of the first things we learn about them. They tend to be violent, totally insane, they have a tragic past which isn’t IMMEDIATELY explored but it very likely will be and will impact the audiences views on the characters greatly. The character is again, insane, and usually completely evil or at least a rival character, or a villain for a little while, but they are more often than not one of if not the most popular character in the story due to their dialogue, appearance, demeanour and backstory making them highly endearing. They usually are the one with a more obvious thing for the other character although this is not required. This is also where I find it’s often mishandled by a one sided thing that may not even be a crush at all being seen as mutual love.
The other character is usually less liked, but honestly a much more in depth and interesting character if the fans weren’t so busy being distracted by all the other shit going on. The character tends to, but doesn’t have to at all, seem outwardly very sane, very reserved, and sort of like a foil to the other character. This is not at all the case. In fact, this character tends to be WAY more messed up than the other character ever could be. They are completely messed up, twice as tragic at times, capable of far far worse crimes for instance playing a somewhat active role in causing the apocalypse or killing god. This character is often also interpreted as an UwU femboy if male, or as a tsundere softie if male or female, which pisses me off but ok go off. This character is very interesting in the way the act, they usually take on a protagonist role and regardless of what their actual relationship is with the other character wether they are a friend or enemy, they interact a lot, tend to be at odds with eachother, and have an interesting dynamic.
This ship occurs a lot, and I have yet to see anyone ever bring it up.
I believe if handled incorrectly, and by that I mean it having no canon bearings and being entirely collective headcanon, it is one of the worst tropes ever. I think things that save it is if both characters are decidedly better people by the ending, if there was even a hint of intention from the creator to even have these characters have a bond, if they have any positive interactions, and for gods sake if they are both legal, not related, not at a major power imbalance, it’s not obviously one sided, and not overtly stating that their negative traits are not negative and that neither character is capable of being held accountable for any of their actions.
Other people might have mentioned this I’ve just never seen it in any “shipping dynamics” images which is weird because I’ve been in multiple fandoms where it’s happened and happened to be front and centre, so it feels like no one has really given it much thought.
I’ll talk about how I plan to utilize this in a repost of this with no tags attached because I do not feel it to be related nor do I want to force anyone into hearing stuff about my project.
#ship dynamics#fandom dynamics#ship#No proshippers proshippers go away characters must be around the same age not related and not blatantly toxic#I’ve seen this a lot#fandom culture#trust me I’ve been in like 7 fandoms by now I know what I’m talking about with reoccurring stuff#again no pro#I am not in favour of that#I’m not sending death threats to pros like some assholes do but I just don’t appreciate it generally
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