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writersrkive · 3 days ago

Text

Light | Aaron Hotchner

summary: since a few days ago, you have been distracted. Something about the holidays and Christmas is triggering to you. Apparently, the team doesn't notice this, but your boss, of course, does. He is troubled, but when you say that you are sick on Christmas Eve, right before dinner, he is ready to go with you and keep you company. He also appears with a small gift that can cheer you up.

genre: angst, hurt, comfort.

pairing: Aaron Hotchner x bau!gn!reader

warning: holidays and Christmas being a nostalgic/sad holiday to reader, mention of reader not being from Virginia, family issues (reader), reader is new member of the team, allusion of an age gap (not specific), reader being called "kid" two or three times.

a/n: so... maybe I projected myself a bit into this fic. I hope whoever feels like the main character feels some comfort and understanding here. I'm sorry if there's anything wrong with the writing, I haven't edited yet, but I wanted it posted before Christmas (it's 11pm in my country). English isn't my first language, please be kind <3. Merry Christmas reader, thank you for being here one more year! I'm proud of you.

Masterlist Spanish ver. On Wattpad (coming soon)

Christmas isn't what it was a few years ago, but neither was your family. When you decided to move to Virginia, far from home, it was hard for you because despite having a broken family, the feeling of wanting to fix everything for everyone was still there. The holidays, especially Christmas, brought back memories of when everything was fine —or so it seemed—.

The dynamic of the team was like a family, but as the newest member —and one of the youngest— it was hard to feel completely into it. However, you didn't feel as isolated as you did at first. So, they didn't notice how nostalgic and sad your aura was the days before.

Oh, but Aaron, your boss, did.

It started the day that some workmates decorated the office with a mini Christmas tree, lights and bows. Everyone was heading home, except him, as usual. The paper work ended so the stoic man was closing the door of his office when he noticed the way you were standing in front of the tree, almost giving him your back. He could see half of the profile he caught himself admiring often. The lights were reflected in the sad look similar to that of a child hoping to obtain something impossible.

“Why are you still here?” He asked, not scolding, but rather with curiosity.

“Oh, good night Hotch. I was finishing some paperwork.” Your expression showed that you had come out of a trance.

“Are you done?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good. Maybe we can walk to our cars together.”

“Sure.”

He didn't try to make small talk. The feeling of tiredness was in the air, but he also felt that he shouldn't try to break down any kind of personal barrier that you had at that moment. Because despite showing a friendly smile, it was obvious that your mind was somewhere else.

Then, a few days later, you were distracted by something peculiar.

“Hey, are you okay?” Derek asked when he noticed that you weren't listening to his theories. Hotch was talking to a police officer, but he was looking at the way your workmate and you were analyzing the crime scene. “Are you cold?” His teasing smile made you chuckle slightly.

“Yeah. I still haven't gotten used to the weather, sorry.” The lie went unnoticed by your colleague. They were profilers, but you were one too, so it was kind of easy to fake certain things. It wasn't right, but at that time of the year you just wanted to survive. Besides, you couldn't tell them anything, not because you didn't trust them, but because it was too much to handle.

Across the street, Aaron looked in the direction you were looking before Derek spoke to you. It was a park a few blocks away. There was an ice rink, giant decorations, and lots of families gathered around. What could that place have to distract you so much?

There were many other occasions like that. The last time was on Christmas Eve. Months ago, Penelope had decided to buy an instant camera to take photos of the team inside and outside of work, when they had days off.

“Here it is, my beautiful fellas!” The blonde said excitedly. “Your handmade Christmas gift!”

She made all of you sit around the table, so she could put in the center the sparkling red notebook, with silver letters. 'Memories at the BAU' could be read.

“Garcia! It's so beautiful!” Emily said, smiling. Derek hugged his friend in appreciation and JJ got closer to Emily so she could see better.

“Look at that. Always a great time for pasta.” Rossi joked looking at one of the pictures where he could be seen making pasta for dinner after a heavy case.

“Always looking good.” Derek said pointing at a picture of him posing with one of the plushies García had at her office.

“Look at us! But why do you look so sad?” JJ joked looking at a group photo. You could be seen at the back with a forced smile.

“I was a little tired, sorry.” You answered, but the reality was that you had received some messages from your family minutes before that photo was taken.

“Hey, why did you take a photo of me taking a nap?” The confused tone in Spencer's voice made you laugh a little, but Aaron noticed the way your eyes didn't light up.

“Does anyone know where our newest member is?” Derek asked, smiling. He can't help but remember the way Emily, JJ and he teased you before. You started to get late to a few compromises —it happened at work once or twice—, but your boss didn't scold you like he would scold anyone else on the team. “He has a soft spot for someone.” Derek playfully twitched that time, thinking the bags under your eyes weren't caused by anything but work —he was wrong—.

“The kid just sent a message to the group chat.” Rossi announced.

“Sick?” Penelope showed her worry, reading your message.

Aaron felt a weird pinch on the chest. He immediately got even more worried than everyone in Rossi's house, even if his face just tensed a little bit more than usual. In his mind he debated whether to go with you to make sure you were okay, even though it might be intrusive.

Maybe you needed space….

Or maybe there was something else you weren't telling them, just like he noticed before.

“Am… I think I'm a little bit sick too.” He whispered after a while.

“What? We are about to eat dinner.” Emily said a little sad. She was worried about the team's health now that Aaron and you were sick.

“I'll be fine. I'm going to take some food with me in case I get hungry later." His movements were a little fast, as if in a hurry.

“Are you sure you don't need a medic, Aaron?” His old friend said and the boss could sense a little teasing in his tone.

“I'm good, I just need to go right now. I'll see you tomorrow. Everyone, please be safe.” The team could sense sincerity in those words when he gave them one last look, after he took the food, his jacket and his keys, and before stepping out of the house.

“Kid is gonna have some company.” Derek teased and everyone, including Reid, smiled knowing what was going on.

Both of you were surprised when you opened the door. He didn't expect to see you with red puffy eyes and nose, and you didn't expect him there, in front of your house, holding some tuppers with food and something else tangled in his arms.

“Hotch?” Your furrowed eyebrows and tilted head made his chest feel warm. You looked confused and also cute. He felt a little bad to think like that when something was wrong with you.

“I needed to make sure you were okay.” That's all he said.

“Oh… Am… I'm just a little…”

“Sick? I don't think so. You have been acting weird, and Christmas has something to do with that. I know because apparently it triggers something that makes you… sad.” His voice was soft. It felt like he didn't want to expose you, but he needed to show how much he knew about the situation. “I don't think you actually fool them. At least, not now. Maybe in the beginning, but that wasn't my case.” But you did feel exposed, even a little ashamed. The lack of movement told Hotch that you were uncomfortable. “I'm sorry…”

“It's okay. I guess it's impossible to fool S.S.A. Aaron Hotchner.” You showed a sad smile, it was more like a grin. “Wait, what about Jack?”

“He's with his aunt. They were on a trip I couldn't join because of obvious reasons. I guess we can keep each other company.” Little by little he had begun to show a smile that was contagious to you.

“Sure.”

When he walked in he noticed the lack of decorations on the surroundings. There was just a small tree at the back of a hall. It had a start at the top and had some lights and spheres. That was it.

“I'm sorry if I'm being intrusive, but can I ask what's wrong?” he asked when you started to help him to put the food on two plates.

You sighted thinking about all the things you needed to explain so you could give him an answer. “It's complicated. I don't know if I wanna talk about that.”

“That's okay. Then, can you tell me how you are feeling?”

You smiled, knowing he changed the question so as not to make you feel uncomfortable, while still keeping in mind the fact that he needed to know how you were feeling. “Everything brings memories. I'm supposed to be with my family, but what family?” I asked, sitting next to him in the kitchen. “Sometimes I wish things were like before, like having a time machine and just going there: where everyone was. Now I know how heavy the family issues were, but I was a kid so at least I was living in a lie… a good lie.”

“I know family is complicated. There's people who hurt other people, and that's not right, but there's too much.”

“Exactly…”

“But you have a family here too, now.” He whispered. And the way he looked at you made you feel like you weren't alone, at least not how you have thought.

“That's why I bring Rossi's lasagna with me. He's gonna be sad if you don't get to try it.”

Dinner was good. Of course you loved Rossi's cooking, but you came to the conclusion that it was because of the company of your boss. He helped a lot by distracting you, chatting about Jack, some plans outside of work and various things. After a few hours you couldn't handle your curiosity anymore.

“Hotch, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, what is it?” Apparently, your question took him by surprise, perhaps it was the tone in which you spoke to him, almost tenderly.

“What is that?” You pointed at what he left coiled up on the armrest of one of the sofas in your living room. It looked like a silver wire with transparent stuff on it.

“These are Jack's favorite lights. We bought it a few years ago. He loved them until we bought a set of identical, larger lights. Do you want to see?”

“Yes!” Your childish tone made him smile.

He untangled the lights and plugged them into the nearest socket, quickly his hands and the place where the lights rested shone brightly.

“Wow…” It was almost a whisper, but Aaron enjoyed the answer as if it was a shout of joy. “These are beautiful.”

“I knew you liked the lights.”

“Huh? Oh! You mean the night when you caught me staring at the…”

“Yeah.”

“Well, yeah, I liked lights. I think I've always liked them, but at some point the feeling became sad."

“They are for you.”

“No, but, Jack…”

“Like I said, he has new ones, so, there's no problem. He will love that you have them.”

“Can you help me to…” You hesitated.

“Sure. Let's go, where do you want them?”

A fun playlist invaded your house. While Hotch held a ladder and watched your back to see if you lost your balance, you placed the string of lights in the living room window.

“Can you turn them on?” You asked him gently. The decorated window came to life as did your eyes and Aaron couldn't feel calmer as he admired your excited countenance.

“I'm glad you liked them.”

Suddenly, cries of excitement were heard from neighboring houses and some Christmas songs began to play from the speakers of nearby restaurants even louder.

“Merry Christmas, Hotch.” You said when you came down from the ladder. The man who came to brighten your night didn't think that seeing your expression would fill his chest with warmth.

“Merry Christmas, kid.”

You definitely didn't know or would have imagined that the man who watched your back at work was what you needed to feel better. He brought the light you needed for days.

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puckinghischier · 3 days ago

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Can your beautiful mind provide some domestic Christmas Quinn thoughts?

well…i have been thinking about how quinn is 100% one of those men that can’t wrap a present to save his life. so when you’re out doing some last minute shopping one day, he brings all of your presents out of their hiding spot and tries his best.

he starts out on his own, watching youtube videos and tutorials to try and make sure he measures the paper right and creases it properly. but when he ends up with several…wad-looking wrapping jobs he facetimes his mom, recruiting her as a wrapping coach.

“mom, i’ve tried so many times and i just can’t get it right. she’s told me before how much she loved wrapped presents, so i don’t want to just put them all in bags, but i don’t know if i’m going to have much of a choice at this point.”

ellen laughs at her son, pulling out her own wrapping supplies and tries to show him again. she talks him through the whole process, and when he finally wraps a present right, he’s beaming from ear to ear. she stays on the phone and coaches him through the rest of your presents as he thanks his mom over and over again for her help.

just as he’s placed the last one under the tree (the poorly wrapped ones shoved in the back) he hears the door open and in you walk with a hoard of shopping bags on each arm.

when you walk into the living room, eyes glued to the now full space under the tree, your eyes light up.

“quinn, did you wrap all of these?”

he walks over to you, taking some of the bags from your hands. “sure did. all by myself,” he beams at you.

“excuse me, your mother had a hand in this too. where’s my credit?”

you hear ellen’s voice flowing through the speaker of quinn’s phone, the device still propped up on the coffee table, surrounded by wrapping paper.

quinn’s face turns bright red, forgetting his mom was still on the phone. you look at his embarrassed state, endeared more than anything that he cared about wrapping your presents so much, he called his mom as a reinforcement.

“is that true?” he nods his head.

“well, yeah. i kinda botched the first few, and the youtube videos weren’t helping, so aside from taking them all to a store to have someone professionally wrap them for me, mom was my last shot,” he shrugged, embarrassed about the fact his lack of wrapping skills has been outed.

“q, that’s so sweet oh my god,” you gush at him, batting your eyes and bringing your hand to rest over your heart.

“really? you don’t think it’s embarrassing i don’t know how to wrap a present?”

you balk at him, rolling your eyes. “quinn, the fact you went through so much trouble to wrap them, instead of putting them in a bag like every other guy i’ve ever dated, is the sweetest thing ever. why would i care if they’re perfectly wrapped or not?”

“see, quinn! i told you she wouldn’t care if they were perfect!” you hear from his phone, both of you having now forgotten about ellen.

“yeah, quinn. listen to your mother,” you playfully scold him, walking past him so you’re in frame on his phone. “thanks, ellen. what ever would these boys do without you?” you joke with her, earning a laugh.

“oh, you know, probably bug you a lot more than they already do,” she jests back, referencing how often not only your own hughes boy calls you about needing help with finding things around the apartment, or needing you to tell him what the brand name is of that certain kind of protein powder is he likes, but how often his two brothers call you with their own questions and advice requests.

“alright, mom, thanks for your help and all, but i have all the presents wrapped and i need help her put all this stuff away now. i love you, bye,” quinn interrupts the laughter ringing out between you and his mom, picking up his phone and pressing the end call button.

“quinn, you did not just hang up on your mom,” you scold him, gasping at his actions.

“i’d had her on the phone for hours already it’s fine,” he brushes it off. “plus, i don’t think she’d want to witness what i’m about to do,” he walks towards you, pointing up to the mistletoe strung high above your head.

you look back down just as he reaches you, grabbing your face and pulling you in for a very heated kiss.

dropping the bags in your hands, he walks the two of you over to the couch, all mention of gifts and wrapping forgotten.

#quinn hughes #hockey #nhl #quinn hughes fanfiction #quinn hughes fic #quinn hughes fluff #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes x you #quinn hughes x y/n

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mofongomuncher · 2 days ago

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𝘼 𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙛𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧

POV: Telling Ekko you’re pregnant

Im gonna be posting a bunch of lil Ekko oneshots on Wattpad, I feel like this man doesn’t get enough stories and it irkssss me sm. So if you’d like to read more the link is at the end!!

I'm not all that good at writing, I’m also doing this for fun so please go easy on me. I'm hoping to get better as I keep writing. But I still hope you guys enjoy it!! :3

The Firelight base, hidden among the green thick fogs of Zaun, was Ekko's haven. A quiet—peaceful place from the chaos of the Undercity.

His little room at the top of his tree was where he could think, when the weight of leadership felt too heavy—he could sit, take a moment for himself for a little bit.

His room was filled with unfinished projects, blueprints and tools scattered all across his workbench, The lanterns and candles cast a soft, wam glow over the space, giving it a calming, almost ethereal atmosphere.

But tonight...tonight felt different.

Tonight, there was something heavy in the air.

Y/N sat on the edge of his bed, She had something she needed to say. Something that had been on her mind for days now. But the thought of how Ekko would react to it made her heart race like hell.

Ekko was seated at his workbench, tinkering with a device, his brows furrowed in concentration. When Y/N finally spoke, her voice barely rose above a whisper, it stopped him cold.

"Ekko," she began, and when he turned, the look on his face shifted. His precious brown eyes locked onto hers, and for a moment, she saw his guard come down, just a fraction.

He stood, his usual cool confidence flickering for just an instant. "What's up doll? You've been acting different... is something wrong?"

Y/N hesitated.

Fuck This wasn't easy.

How do you tell someone you love so much that their life is about to change forever?

But she couldn't keep it to herself anymore.

"Ekko...I'm pregnant."

Ekko froze. His expression was unreadable for a second before his eyes narrowed, brows drawing together. His mind that was always fast, was now working overtime, processing what the hell she just said.

For a second, the silence felt like a punch to the gut, the weight of his thoughts pressing down on both of them.

"You're... pregnant?" He repeated, his voice low, almost to himself, like he wasn't sure whether to believe it or not. He just stood there, trying to find something to say but was unable to form the words just yet.

Y/N nodded, swallowing hard.

"I found out a little while ago. I just didn't know how to tell you. Hell, I didn't even know how to process it myself."

Ekko rubbed his forehead, He was silent for a moment longer before he spoke, his voice rougher than usual, but it was tinged with concern. "I... I'm not sure what to do with this Y/N...Fuck...I didn't even expect to see this coming.."

Y/N's heart clenched at the uncertainty in his voice. She had been afraid of this, of him not knowing how to react.

she took a deep breath, trying to keep her voice steady. "I didn't expect this either. I'm scared too Ekko. But I don't—I can't to do this alone. I need you."

Ekko didn't move right away, his gaze still locked on her. His hands fidgeted with a loose gear on the workbench, his mind was clearly in a battle between his responsibilities and the unexpected future baby unfolding in front of him.

"Damn..." he muttered, shaking his head, his usual confident demeanor cracked for a moment.

"...I—I don't even know what kind of father I'd be. I barely have time to think straight with everything that's going on lately." His voice softened, but it was raw, honest—Ekko was always the kind of person who wasn't afraid to show what he was feeling around me, even if it made him vulnerable.

"But I'm not gonna back down from it..." "Not from you."

Y/N felt the tension in her chest start to melt away as he spoke.

She stepped closer, her eyes softening, the relief obvious in her expression.

Ekko's eyes softened as he took a step closer, his hand gently cupping her face. "Whatever happens next, we'll figure it out..Like we always do." His smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

He leaned in a little closer, their foreheads brushing together. He seemed to take a moment to just soak it all in, before speaking again, softer this time.

"I love you Y/N."

Y/N's smile softened, feeling her heart swell. But before she could say anything, Ekko's voice had that hint of excitement. "And I'm gonna love our baby too. I'll teach 'em alll the important stuff."

He leaned back a bit, his eyes sparkling with affection. "Can you imagine? A little mini us running around just causing all the trouble, and I'm the one trying to keep it all together while you just—well, you'll be egging 'em on won't you?"

Y/N raised an eyebrow, her lips curling into a playful grin. "Oh absolutely! That little ball of happiness is gonna have all of your genius and a whole lot of my sass... We'll have a little firecracker on our hands."

Ekko's grin grew, the playful energy between them settling into something warm and steady. "They'll be perfect." He stepped in, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead, then slowly brushing his lips against hers in a gentle, lingering kiss.

When they pulled away, he smiled, his hand gently resting on her cheek. "And if they're half as amazing as you, we'll be just fine."

Y/N's heart fluttered, her smile growing as she met his eyes. "I love you Ekko."

"I love you too Y/N"

#arcane #ekko arcane #ekko #ekko x reader #leauge of legends #arcane season 2 #arcane series #ekko league of legends #ekko x you #lol #fanfic #arcane ekko #ekko lol #league of legends #jinx arcane #jinx #vi arcane #cait arcane #stories

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hxlxnaaa · 3 days ago

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can i pretty please have the extended version of what happens in zaynes exclusive tutorial……. asking for a friend……..

ⁱ ᵃᵐ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠʳⁱᵉⁿᵈ….

𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐮𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥

★ synopsis: an extended version of zaynes exclusive tutorial 5-star ;)

★ character: zayne

★ cw: first person pov, quickie SMUT!!!!, a lot of the dialogue is just taken from the card

★ word count: 3.5k

★ a/n: i literally have not wrote smut since i was at least 13...i lowkey blacked out writing this so if it sucks i'm so sorry. it was good practice though so ty for the request!

Internally, I was dreading this. As a Deepspace Hunter, low-key yet high end, relaxed events were not something I was accustomed to. While it was a nice change from the chaotic atmosphere of my own work, I couldn’t help but worry I may embarrass myself.

When Zayne first invited me, I was a bit surprised he’d ask me of all people. I was sure the man was convinced I’d, at some point during the night, make a fool of him and myself. Though I was pleased he thought of me, and honored to be chosen, it put the stakes of the night higher.

I tried to make myself as fancy as possible, without overdoing it, because I was convinced these people would know I was trying too hard. I mean, they were all top med school alumnus who probably made more in a day than I made in a year.

Walking in with Zayne, the club lighting was low with soft jazz playing in the background. I scanned the perimeter, and observed the people around. Nearly everyone had brought a companion, and I smirked to myself. Mentioning I could tell why he brought me along, I gestured for him to lean down to my level.

“Did you feel left out because everyone else brought someone? Is that why?”

Zayne looked back at me, “Yes. It’s why I invited you.”

“Lame… I thought you’d make up an excuse and deny it.

Bantering with him for a second, one of his classmates approached us. The two make small talk with each other, when the man finally introduces himself as Steven to me, reaching out for a handshake. Before I can even respond, Zayne quickly grabs my hand instead.

“Let’s find a place to sit down and talk.”

Sitting at the bar with Zayne and his classmates, I get to finally turn off my brain and just listen. All of them go on and boast about him, Steven particularly going on about his pool skills. Zayne sits comfortably with the attention, and it’s safe to assume he’s well accustomed to being the center of it all; though it didn’t last when I quickly caught his eye, as he gave me a helpless look.

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” He whispered to me, an edge to his voice that was practically begging me to get him out and away from these people.

Zayne grabs his drink, assuming I was going to agree, and I stop him. He gives me a confused look as I turn my body to fully face him. Deciding to have some fun, the drinks I’ve had giving me some liquid courage-

“I haven’t seen Dr. Zayne play pool either… Is he really that good?” I smiled at him.

He pauses, lips forming into a tight line, “Ah, so you’re ganging up on me.”

I was pushing the right buttons.

While another classmate comes up to Zayne, doting all over him like the others, as he goes on about “hands on learning” with him.

I smirk inwardly, taking a sip out of my wine glass. Oh yeah, I thought to myself, I’m gonna use that one.

After the man leaves, Zayne playfully pinches my ear, “I could see you eavesdropping from a mile away, did you find anything interesting?”

I looked up at him through my eyelashes, “I heard…” Pretending to think for a second, I looked around the room, then back at him, “you’re incredibly considerate to your juniors and are highly respected by everyone, Dr. Zayne”

He sighs, looking away, clearly unsatisfied with my answer. “I guess you can be nice…” I tapped his shoulder.

Zayne raises an eyebrow, “You guess? Do I not treat you well?”

Shrugging, I shake my head and raise my hands, feigning innocence, “It’s hard to say…” I take another sip out of my glass. “You never did any ‘hands-on’ learning with me.” Sticking out my lower lip in a pout, “And everyone says it’s an honor to be taught by you, sir…”

Putting down my wine glass, I sigh, “I wonder when I’ll get to experience it…”

“It seems you truly do want to learn about surgeries.” Zayne retorts.

“Who says it has to be for work?”

He looks at me, almost startled.

“Follow me.”

On the club's second floor, the billiard hall is tucked away, secret, and empty.

Perfect.

Walking forward, I circle around one of the pool tables.

“Why are we playing pool all of a sudden?” Zayne asks from behind me.

I flip my hair and look at him over my shoulder, “Because I wanna learn from you of course. Dr. Steven was praising your pool skills, but you’ve never mentioned them before.” I pushed my back to the table, leaning back on my hands.

Zayne walks up to me, “He was drunk and just rambling.”

“Oh? He said you were really good…” Cocking my head to the side to look at him, he stared back at me with intent, “Like a professional.”

“Maybe because a surgeon has steady hands.”

“Then-” I stood up straight again, crossing my arms and smiling sweetly, “it’d be nice if I could get some tips from you.”

“While I can’t give any tips per se, we can play.” He looks at me and smiles back, “If you want.”

Picking out two cue sticks, handing me the shorter one, he walks to one of the tables in the corner, “Have you played before?”

“Once or twice. People say I have potential,” Zayne raises a brow at my confidence, “but I ‘can play’.”

“Are you gonna be strict with me, sir?” I playfully swing around the cue stick. Zayne crosses his arms, leaning into me, “Strict teachers make outstanding students.” He states, “Let’s start.”

Gesturing for me to go, I lean over the table, feeling his eyes boring into me. I hold my breath as I hit the ball, the only sound in the room the echoes of the balls scattering.

Zayne chuckles under his breath, and I look back at him, “Did I do something wrong, sir?”

“You have more than enough strength. If you adjust your posture, you’ll see better results.”

“I need you to help me identify my weak spots via ‘hands-on learning’, sir.”

I watch as his facade begins to crumble a bit, before he quickly regains himself, “We’ll have to work on your posture then.”

Coming up next to me, I stand up straight as he leans down over the table, “Like this. Place your right foot back…” He strikes, graceful as ever. When I try, I look like a klutz.

Bent over the table, he comes up behind me. “Relax,” He whispers, “you’re too tense.” He places his hand on my back, and almost as a reflex to his touch, my waist immediately bends. “Now you’re too relaxed.” He clicks his tongue as I become jelly under his touch.

“Relax your left arm. Allow it to bend naturally.” His arm snakes up under mine, “Your head, right arm, and the cue stick should form a straight line.”

He places his hand softly on my cheek, shifting my head to the left, “How is it?”

“It,” I winced at the uncomfortable position, “hurts a little.”

I hear him smile, “That means it’s correct.”

Making a face, I try to give him my most pitiful look.

“You’re so harsh, sir.”

He grabs my chin, making me face the table again. The gesture makes me gasp.

“Don’t tilt your head.” Zayne remarks, “You messed up your posture again.”

“Is there an easier way? Like something I can do without much trouble?”

“Yes, but are you sure you want to do it?”

I groan, my body feeling stiff from holding this pose for so long, “Bring it on.”

I feel him shift from beside me, “Don’t move for now.”

Zayne comes up behind me, positioning himself where his chest is flush against my back. Reaching his arms around me, one of his hands comes up to grab mine. Lowering his head, I feel his breath on my neck as his lips settle next to my ear, “Your rhythm with the cue stick…isn’t quite there yet.” My eyelids flutter closed at his voice, “You need more hands-on training.”

He directs me carefully, “You should neither be too fast nor too hesitant.” His words sound distant as all I can focus on is the feeling of his body pressed against mine, as heat spreads in between my thighs.

My hand is enveloped in his, and the back and forth motion of the cue stick slows down, “Move the cue stick three or four times..” He instructs, everything about this feeling overwhelmingly provocative, “Stop at the point closest to the ball…”

“Did you get that?” He whispered, turning his head away from the pool table to face mine.

“Yeah…” Was all I could muster back.

Softly smirking, he turned back to follow my vision, “Keep your eyes on the ball, one…two…three…” I think I may actually combust if he keeps this up.

“Stop, and pull back the cue stick.”

He loosens his grip on me, “Snap out of it. Are you even listening to me?”

No, not really Zayne. I can really only focus on not grinding back into you right now.

“Ah yes,” I cough, “Pull back the stick…”

“Very good, just like that…” I bite back a whimper and the urge to rub my legs together at his praise, he knows good and well what he’s doing.

“Now…strike.”

I hit the ball, and when it goes in I snap out of whatever hypnotic haze I was in.

“It’s in!”

Zayne pulls back, and I stand up straight, placing my hands on my hips. “Did you see that? It was a great shot! I’m so cool…” Flipping my hair over my shoulder, I flash him a smile.

“I did.” He smiles warmly back, “You’re not a total beginner.”

“Maybe it’s because I practice shooting all the time. Or, it’s possible I’m a prodigy…” I started regaining my confidence after it had ever so slowly faltered on the pool table.

“Perhaps.” Zayne shrugs, “To be honest, all you need to be good at pool is…”

He leans over the edge of the table, looking over at me. My breath hitches at the sight.

“A steady hand, precision, and a calm attitude.” His eyes bore into mine, “Once you’ve locked into your target, don’t let go.”

I swallowed. Even though he was clearly talking about the ball, it felt oddly personal.

He has me play a bit more, teaching me as I go. I easily earn his praises and they ring like music in my ears.

“If a student does a good job,” I remind him, “shouldn’t they get a reward?”

He considers it for a second, “What do you want?”

Confidence bubbling up again inside of me, I sigh dramatically. “Well, it might be difficult to hit this next ball. Help me.”

“Is that all?” Zayne asks, clearly not convinced. Pausing before coming to help me, I give him a smug look, “What’s wrong Dr. Zayne? Are you scared?”

I was pushing my luck, and loving every second of it.

He frowned, “Provocation doesn’t work on me.”

“Then come here.” I nodded toward the pool table, giving him a sweet smile.

Zayne inches towards me, only moving slightly closer.

“Closer.” I demand, “Or else I can’t reach it.”

He gives me a confused look, “What exactly…”

I grab him by the collar, pushing him back onto the table. Zaynes cheeks turn pink as he stares up at me with a shocked expression. Lips slightly agape, I can see a million thoughts running behind his eyes. The dumbfounded look on his face makes me want to take him on the table right now.

“Look,” I pout, “the ball’s so far away. I think it’s time to use a cue rest.”

I tap the cue stick on each side of his head. Zayne narrows his eyes at me, “Using cue rests would be overkill.” He sits up, and I use the stick to slowly tug out his tie, “And this,” he glares, “is inappropriate.”

Though he feigns annoyance, the look in his eyes is a dead giveaway.

“But…” I pull the stick away leaning towards him, my breath dusting his ear, “I think you’re enjoying it…” He looks down and away at the table, clearly embarrassed, “I shouldn't have taught you so much” he mutters.

Running my fingers through his dark hair, I slowly tease my hand down his body, caressing his face, down to his chest, down to where I see where he’s aching for me to touch the most. I coo at him when I see the desperate look in his eyes, and quickly snap my hand away before I reach the bulge growing in his nice slacks.

Zaynes face is red hot as he sits up on the table enough that he’s eye level with me, “Who taught you to use your teacher as a cue rest…” he frowns.

“Well,” I place my hand on his chest over his heart, “this cue rests heartbeat is going to ruin my accuracy.” I tut.

“Is it my heartbeat affecting your accuracy, or yours?” His hand comes up to caress my cheek, “If you actually want to learn, I can show you another way…”

Zayne leans in, lips almost to mine before I grab his shoulder and push him back. He looks at me, wide eyed at the denial.

“Sir, this seems to be lacking professionalism.” Crossing my arms across my chest, his lips curve at my attempt to scold him.

“Weren’t you just using me as a cue rest?” He leans back in, “Talking about professionalism… is a bit too late.”

As he grabs me by my waist, I push him back onto the table again as a reply. The gesture only lasts a few seconds before Zayne smiles at me, quickly sitting up and using his hand around my waist to reverse us; flipping me onto my back and onto the table, he settled in between my legs. I squeak at the sudden change, as he now hovers over me, my head caged between his arms.

“Why don’t you let me show you…” Zayne pulls back, standing up straight. He grabs his cue stick, “Watch closely, I’m only going to do it once.”

Pushing his chest against mine, he goes for the ball right behind my head. His head hovers right above my face, and I lean up to place a kiss on his adams apple right as he strikes the ball. I have half a mind to bite into his neck, but he quickly stands back up as he watches the ball go in.

He looks down at me, and I’m sure I look utterly disheveled. From where he stood in between my thighs, my dress had ridden up high enough that every inch of my bottom half was almost on display for him to see. My hair was splayed out around me on the table, and my chest heaved with the breath I was so desperately trying to catch.

The sexual tension that had slowly built up throughout the night was now thick enough to cut with a knife. Smiling softly, Zayne tilts my chin up, caressing my jaw as his thumb slowly parted my lips, dipping it past my teeth and pressing it against my tongue. “Pretty little mouth…” he mutters, staring at the way his finger sits in between my lips. I look up at him through half-lidded eyes, sucking down on his thumb.

He frowns, “Always such a tease.” Zayne sighs, picking up my ankle, pressing a kiss to it. I craved his lips on mine, but I always enjoyed the shows he’d put on for me. He continued to kiss up my calf, closing his eyes as he felt my skin against his lips.

“Zayne.” I demanded, and he looked at me annoyed, as if I was interrupting something.

“Yes?”

“Kiss me…”

He leaned down, nose brushing against mine, but not meeting my lips. I pushed myself up, trying to connect us, but he pulled away at the last second. Frustrated and tired of his games, I grabbed Zayne by his tie, crashing my lips against his, pulling him down on top of me onto the table.

“Behave.” He groaned as I took his bottom lip in my teeth, tugging softly. Grabbing my wrists with his hand, he pinned them above my head. Zayne’s free hand roamed up my thigh, fingers dusting over the place I was praying for him to touch the most.

I squirmed under him as he toyed with the lace on my panties, never dipping his fingers past. His grip on my wrists tightened, lips leaving mine so our eyes could meet. Waves of lust crashed in his green eyes.

“What do you want?” His lips kissed down my neck and chest.

“You to touch me.” I whimpered.

He tsked, “Beg.”

“I’m sorry?”

“You heard me. Or do I need to teach you how to do that too?” Zayne nipped at my collarbone, then kissed the skin.

“Please…”

“What was that?”

“Please, Zayne.” Everytime I said please, his fingers inched closer to the arousal pooling in between my thighs, “Zayne, please, please, fuck, please.”

I felt him smile against my skin, and he dipped a finger inside of me.

Clenching around him, I moaned at the satisfaction.

Zayne groaned, “God, you’re so wet. You’ve been eager all night…” Pumping in and out, I stifled my whimpers and moans against his shoulder. He let go of my wrists, and my hands flew to his collar, gripping for dear life as he added another finger.

Tracing his thumb on my clit, two fingers curling up inside of me, Zayne always knew just how to make me come undone. He could get off on this alone, watching me fall apart underneath him by just his hands. I was seeing stars, thinking nothing could get better than this.

Zayne pulled away, and I cried out at the emptiness. He stood there for a second, just taking all of me in, “You’re so beautiful.” He took off his tie, gently grabbing me by the back of my head and lifting it up so he could tie the fabric around my mouth as a makeshift gag.

“As much as I love to listen to you, I don’t want anybody else to hear. Is that all right?”

I nodded at him and he smiled, petting my cheek, “Good girl.”

Reaching forward, I palmed his hard on through his nice, business slacks. The idea of them being around his ankles as he takes me on this table was enough to almost make me cry from joy. Sighing at the friction, Zaynes eyes fluttered closed, and I worked my hand up and undid his belt. Getting too eager, he freed himself, and slid my panties down to where they loosely dangled off one of my heels.

“I wish I could take my time with you,” He pressed his tip against my opening, “but this will have to do.” Sinking all the way down to the hilt, I choked out a muffled scream, squeezing my eyes shut as the tie killed my lewd noises.

Zayne grabbed my chin, fingers digging into my skin, “Eyes open.” He demanded, pulling out, and slamming back in, “Keep looking.”

Already overwhelmed from the stimulation he provided earlier, tears welled up in my eyes from just how good all of it felt. The impossibly delicious way he could fill me up, lips dancing across my skin as he chased after his own pleasure. His hand gripping into my hips, most likely leaving bruises, as he drilled into me; kissing my palm before biting into the skin to muffle his own groans.

Zayne’s skin glistened with sweat, the top buttons of his shirt undone, his lips red and swollen from my aggressions. He railed into me like a maniac, like he was fucking starving. Gracefully, his hand found its way back in between my thighs, finding the bundle of pleasure that made me cry out. At the feeling I blinked out tears, my eyes burning from the mascara I was practically sobbing away. I was moments away from ruining this table beneath me, and Zayne knew that.

He grabbed my neck, almost as if for stability as he picked up his pace. Desperately rolling his hips against mine, I clenched down around him “Just.. like that, oh... God." He moaned. I lifted my hips up to meet his thrusts, trying to chase my own release and his. Zayne looked me in the eyes, squeezing the hand around my neck, “My girl. Mine.” He groaned.

With one last thrust and his praise, I was screaming behind the tie, shaking from my release beneath him. Digging my nails into his biceps, his hips stuttered, and with a moan he pulled out, finishing all over my nice dress.

Zayne nearly collapsed on top of me as we laid there for a while, just soaking in the aftermath. As he pulled away, I watched him cringe at the mess he had left on me. For some reason, I started laughing.

“What’s that for?” He questioned.

I continued to giggle, “I didn’t know you were that good at pool…”

“If we had more time, I’d show you more of my techniques…”

Slapping him on the shoulder, I sat up, and he swept me off the table and back onto my feet. Brushing my hair with his fingers, he attempted to wipe away the mascara stains on my cheeks. “I know the back way out of here,” He pressed a kiss to my temple.

(divider by cafekitsune)

#zayne x reader #zayne x you #zayne x y/n #love and deepspace zayne #zayne #l&ds zayne #lnds zayne #lads zayne #lads #lnds #lnds smut #lnds fluff #zayne love and deepspace #zayne smut #zayne fluff #zayne x mc #love and deep space

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sylver-star · 1 day ago

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⭑.ᐟ

Neither of you have had a craft day since you were kids, but the sudden urge was too powerful to ignore. So, you and Vernon are now sitting on the floor, making bracelets and putting patches on your clothes. It started out as you needing to mend a pair of jeans, which led to Vernon sitting down next to you with a box of beads that he "borrowed" from Joshua.

"Look at this one." Vernon holds up a newly made bracelet.

The beads are black and red, but in the middle there are a few white ones with letters on them. "L U V U".

"Luvu?" You snort.

"Love. You," he corrects. "It's cute!"

"It looks like it says luvu," you continue to tease him, but feel a little bad when you look at his disappointed expression. "I luvu you too, though."

Now it was Vernon's turn to snort. He put the bracelet on the floor in front of him, and you put down whatever you're working on to pick it up. You open the clasp and put it over your wrist, which you hold out to Vernon.

"Clasp it for me? Please?"

"You don't have to wear it," he says.

"I want to. Now, clasp it already. I can't do it myself."

He does as you ask, and you happily look at the red and black bracelet. "It's never coming off, just so you know."

"Dork."

"Nerd."

The two of you chuckle and return to your crafts. You've just finished sewing on a patch to Vernon's jean jacket. It was probably too expensive for you to ever afford, but Vernon was adamant that you sew on a patch for him. You hold it up for him to see.

"Oh, that's sick! How did you do the stars? Did you buy a special pen or something?" He reaches out to touch it, but you quickly pull it back.

"Nail polish," you correct him. "And I don't think it's dry yet."

He leans over and looks a bit closer at the design. "You should paint my nails to match."

That's how you end up with Vernon's hands in your lap, a thin brush with black nail polish carefully drawing stars on his nails. As you finish up the final nail, he holds his fingers up to the light.

"That's really cool." He nods in approval.

Some of his nails are completely painted black - a sign of your mistakes - but most have one star covering each of them. "And it'll match the jacket," you add.

"You make me a cooler person," he says, and can't help but laugh at how silly it sounds.

"Please." You roll your eyes, but a part of you feels proud. And you know that you will soon see photos of him, zoomed in on his nails and the details on his jacket, and be able to read the comments thanking his stylist - which just happened to be you.

#seventeen #fluff #vernon #vernon x reader #vernon x you #vernon x y/n #vernon fluff #seventeen x you #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagines #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fluff #svt #syl says☆

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pedroscurls · 3 days ago

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christmas confessions (pt. 5 - day 5)

summary: it's christmas day and you and logan navigate your new relationship and get acquainted with one another. pairing: origins!logan howlett x fem!reader content warnings: smut (18+ mdni), seated cowgirl, fingering, unprotected p in v, these two lovebirds get their happy ending, no use of y/n. word count: 2.4k a/n: merry christmas everyone and happy holidays to those who celebrate (and even to those who don’t - hope you have an amazing day today) 🎄 hope you all enjoyed this little story - i really had so much fun writing it and giving origins logan a happy ending 🥹 pt. 4 | series masterlist.

DAY 5 — You wake up to the feel of Logan’s lips lightly peppering kisses along your shoulder, his strong arms wrapped around you from behind. Yesterday felt like such a dream. This was what you always wanted. He was always what you wanted. Knowing that he felt the same way felt like a weight was lifted off your shoulders. The entire night, you both spent it getting acquainted with each other. His soft kisses, his low growls, the feeling of him pushing into you… It was everything you dreamed of and more.

You slightly stir in his arms and he just pulls you closer, lips now moving to your ear. “Morning, baby,” he whispers.

You smile to yourself and slowly turn on your side to face him, hand coming up to his cheek. Your thumb brushes against his facial hair as you stare deeply into his eyes. “It’s Christmas,” you answer excitedly.

Logan chuckles and nods. “It’s Christmas. Merry Christmas, baby.”

“Merry Christmas, Logan.”

“Think we can spend every Christmas snowed in from now on?” he teases.

You let out a quiet giggle. “Hmm, well you’ll have to meet my family eventually.”

“Of course, but can I have you to myself for a little while longer before we get there?”

“Oh, you’ve got a year,” you grin.

Logan laughs quietly and pecks your lips lightly. “Haven’t slept that good in a while,” Logan admits.

“Maybe you just tired yourself out,” you tease, letting out a quiet yawn.

“Hmm,” he hums, leaning in to brush his nose with yours. “If anyone was tired after what we did last night, it’s you.”

You feel the heat in your cheeks rise as you move your hand from his cheek to move around to the nape of his neck. “Well, you just kept going… even after I felt like I couldn’t anymore.”

He smirks proudly. “Oh, baby,” he whispers, lips brushing against your own. “I just couldn’t get enough of you and the sounds you make, the look on your face when you come…” he growls lowly. “Mmm…”

Gently, you bring your free hand to push against his hard chest as you bite your lower lip. “Logan…”

“Yeah, baby?” he smiles, leaning down to brush his lips against your jawline.

“I’m just a bit sore…”

“Okay,” he whispers.

“But maybe you can help me feel better?”

Logan grins as one of his strong hands moves to hook your leg around his hip. He brings you flush against his growing erection, feeling the thin fabric of your panties and his boxers separating. “Once we start, I may not be able to stop,” he says quietly, feeling your hips roll against him.

“Then don’t,” you answer, leaning in and pressing your lips firmly against his.

—

It’s noon by the time you and Logan get out of bed, but not after hopping into the shower together. You couldn’t get enough of him, just like how he couldn’t get enough of you. You never thought that you’d be here with him, like this. To get to see him come undone, to feel his lips on your most intimate parts of your body, to hear the way he groans and growls when he gets closer and closer to come.

To finally get to hear him tell you that he loves you.

“I love you,” he whispers as he comes up from behind you. Logan’s arms wrap around you from behind, resting his chin on your shoulder as you stand near the stove to begin cooking lunch.

You stop stirring the sauce and gently turn around in his arms, hands snaking up his chest. “I love you too, Logan.”

“So, I got you something.”

“You did?” You ask, your eyes lighting up. “What did you get me?”

“It’s a surprise. Figured we could exchange gifts tonight.”

“I’d really like that,” you answer. “Can we have hot chocolate too?”

He chuckles. “Anything my girl wants, she’s gonna get.”

“You spoil me,” you smile, leaning up on your toes to peck his lips.

“That’s because you deserve the world, baby.”

“Logan…”

“You do,” he says honestly. “And I’ll do my damn best to give it to you.”

You bite your lower lip and card your fingers through his hair, hearing him let out a quiet purr as his eyes flutter in contentment. “You deserve the world too, Logan.”

“I don’t know about that, baby,” he chuckles. “Been alive for so long… have done a lot of things that I regret… lost people that I love and care about. I think maybe I’m just doomed from the start. I’m just trying not to screw this up.”

“You won’t,” you reassure him. “And you’re not doomed.”

“Nothing ever works out for me,” he whispers hesitantly. “And if I’m being honest, it’s only a matter of time before I screw this up too.”

“I’m not going to say it’ll be easy,” you begin. “But I can promise you that I’ll be here for everything; the good, the bad… I want it all as long as it’s with you. I would choose you over and over again, Logan.”

“Why?” He asks, brows furrowed. Logan never thought he was worthy of ever being loved, despite the lingering desire that looms over him. He always felt alone, felt like he just couldn’t belong anywhere, until he met you.

You had felt like home the moment he met you.

“Because you’re worth it… and I believe in you, in us.”

Logan lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding as he suddenly leans in to peck your lips. Wherever you go, Logan knows that he’d follow.

“I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you,” he finally says.

“You’re a good man, Logan,” you say quietly, moving a hand to rest on his cheek. “And I’m a very lucky woman.”

He scoffs playfully. “If anyone’s lucky, sweetheart, it’s me.”

—

Later that night, you’re seated on the floor of the living room with a mug of hot chocolate dressed in one of Logan’s flannels and socks (and nothing else). He’s seated on the couch, staring down at you with a small smile on his lips. You’re so excited to open the gift he’s gotten you just as much as you’re excited to give him the gift you had gotten for him.

He feels a sudden sense of happiness and contentment wash over him. Logan has loved before, but never like this. With you, he feels hopeful. With you, he feels like he can finally live a life that he’s seen so many people live.

A life with someone you love.

To build a home with.

To build a future with.

To settle down, to have kids… to be your husband and eventually a father to your children.

With you, the possibilities are endless.

“Okay, you open yours first.” You grin, handing him a neatly wrapped gift.

Logan takes it from you gently and leans down to kiss your cheek. “Thank you, baby.”

“It’s nothing big,” you tell him. “But I figured that you could put it up somewhere in here.”

He tears open the wrapper and tilts his head. Once he unwraps the gift completely, a large grin lines his lips as he looks down at the small picture frame. Logan runs his thumb across the photograph, glancing over at you then moving his gaze back down to the picture frame in his hands.

“I love it.”

“Do you really?” You ask with a hopeful tone in your voice. “It’s one of my favorite pictures of us. I have it framed at my place and figured you could have one here too.”

He nods, staring down at the picture in the frame. Logan can’t take his eyes off of you; the way your smile meets your eyes, the happiness written all over your features. It was a photograph of the both of you, his arm draped over your shoulder as your face buried into the crook of his neck. It’s obvious that you’re in the middle of laughing and Logan’s surprised at the look on his face too.

His own smile looks relaxed, peaceful and he’s staring down at you with a loving gaze. He loved you then… just as much as he loves you now.

“I love it,” he repeats. Logan stands from the couch and places the picture frame above his fireplace. He grins to himself as he gazes at the frame down to the fire he had going and along to the Christmas tree. For once, his cabin finally feels like home.

“Okay, your turn,” he nods, pointing towards the gift in your hand.

You grin excitedly and begin to rip through the wrapper. Logan lets out a chuckle at the sight of you, so focused and eager to unwrap the gift and find out what’s hidden.

“D’ya like it?” He finally asks, seeing the gift he had gotten you now in full display in front of you.

You nod slowly, tears stoning your eyes as you pull it close to your chest. “I love it, Logan.”

“Yeah?”

“It’s… Perfect.”

“Not a lot of Wolverine plush toys out there,” he points out, moving back to the couch. “And I– I figured you’d like it… that maybe when I’m away or when we’re not together, you have this.”

You nod and then gently set it aside to climb onto the couch with him. You straddle his waist and wrap your arms around him tightly, burying your face into the crook of his neck. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he smiles to himself, arms wrapping tightly around your frame. “Did I do good?” Logan asks honestly.

Slowly, you pull back to look down at him with a small smile and eyes glistening with tears that threaten to spill over. “You did amazing.”

He smiles proudly. “Amazing enough that I get…” he wiggles his brows suggestively.

“Oh, definitely.” You answer, leaning in to press your lips firmly against his own. It’s a slow and intimate kiss, like you’re finally kissing him for the first time. His strong hands move to lift the end of his flannels so that he can rest them on your hips.

Logan plays with the waistband of your panties, gently tugging on them as he moves his lips with your own. Truthfully, he could spend the rest of his days like this with you. When he feels your hips roll against his own, you both let out a quiet groan. He uses this opportunity to deepen the kiss, sliding his tongue past your lips as he moves one hand between your legs instead. Slowly, he pushes your panties off to the side and sinks one digit into your tight heat. You’re already so wet, causing Logan to pull away from the kiss to look at you instead.

Your hands move to his shoulders, gripping it tightly as you feel his finger move in and out of your depths slowly. “Lo– Logan!”

“Already so wet for me,” he points out with a grin. Logan pulls his finger out of you only to slide it back in with another digit. He can feel your walls stretching due to the width of his fingers as he slides both into the knuckle, curling his fingers within your depths.

You let out a loud moan, back arching. “Baby, please,” you beg, walls trembling. “Need you…”

He nods and tugs down his shorts with his boxers, revealing his erected length as it leaks at the tip. He replaces his fingers with his tip, slowly sliding you down onto him. Logan growls at the feeling of your warm and wet her sliding down inch by inch down his throbbing length. He can feel your fingertips dig into his shoulders and it only urges him further.

“Will never get enough of this, of you,” Logan groans, feeling you sit firmly on his lap as his cock remains sheathed inside of you all the way. His eyes flutter when he feels you lift yourself and slide back down. He reaches up and undoes the few buttons on the flannel you’re wearing to reveal your bare front to him.

“You feel so good,” you moan, back arching to expose more of your chest for him. Slowly, you begin to rock forward and backwards in his lap, the hair at his base causing just the right amount of friction against your bundle of nerves.

“Yeah, baby?” He groans, hands moving to your hips to guide your movements. “Tell me how it feels, sweetheart. Fuck,” he grunts.

“S– So deep, so full of you,” you whimper, picking up the pace in your movements. You can feel your peak bearing closer and closer with each roll of your hips and Logan lifts his hips just enough for his tip to nudge at your cervix. You let out a loud moan as a result, hips slowing down as your walls begin to tighten even further around him.

“Fuck, baby– that’s it, take what you need,” Logan groans, watching you in absolute awe.

You collapse against him, face burying into his neck as your body shakes against his own. You slow your movements to a halt as you ride out your climax, but it’s not enough of a break because Logan’s arms wrap around you tightly to keep you flush against him. He grounds his feet into the hardwood floor of his cabin and begins to thrust up into you. Skin slapping against skin echoes throughout his cabin, mixes in with your moans and his low groans.

“Logan!” You exclaim, arms wrapping around his shoulders as he continues his quick and rapid thrusts.

Logan turns his head and gently places a soft kiss on your temple as he pulls out to his tip only to slam back into you; he repeats this movement once, twice, three times before he begins to feel the tightness in his lower abdomen.

He’s close, so fucking close…

“I love you, Logan,” you whisper through your moans. It’s enough for Logan to pull out of you abruptly, reaching down to stroke himself as thick, white ropes of his come lands on your lower abdomen. He lets out a loud groan, body shuddering at his intense release.

“Fuck,” he mumbles. “I love you, baby.”

You smile to yourself and lean in to gently peck his lips. “Merry Christmas, Logan.”

Logan chuckles. “Merry Christmas to you too, sweetheart.”

—-

taglist: @kellyxo1 @misscrissfemmefatale @mooneyloveydovey @oatmilkriver @steviebbboi

#hugh jackman #hugh jackman character #logan howlett #logan howlett fanfiction #logan howlett fanfic #origins!logan #origins logan howlett #wolverine #the wolverine #origins logan howlett fanfic #origins logan howlett fanfiction #origins!logan x reader #origins!logan x female reader #origins!logan x f!reader #story: christmas confessions

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stayteezdreams · 2 days ago

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Christmas Comfort

Plot: You expected to be spending this Christmas alone, left with your own thoughts and loneliness. But your boyfriend and best friends have a surprise for you.

Pairing: Han Jisung x Gn!Reader (est. relationship) + Reader & Stray Kids

A/n's: I'm gonna be real with you, this fic is entirely self serving and a comfort fic for myself. I lost both of my parents this year and they were the only close family I had left. So I will be alone for Christmas for the first time. So I wanted to write something to give myself a little comfort, and help anyone else who might be in a similar situation. I did not give any particulars for why the reader is alone, so hopefully more people can relate if they are alone this Christmas too.

Warnings: Mentions of loneliness, general sadness. Angsty but comforting.

Words: 2k

It felt odd, being alone for Christmas. Before, you would be celebrating with family or friends, enjoying the usual traditions, foods, and movies. You'd have fun decorating the house and the tree. But it was all different this year.

The traditions became memories. The foods unmade; the movies unwatched. Aside from a few decorations you set around your apartment, nothing in your home told you it was Christmas at all. No lights. No tree. No presents. Nothing.

You never really expected that it would end just like that.

If you had known last Christmas would have been the last one you had the way you were used to, you would have cherished it more.

It wasn’t that you hated Christmas now, or didn’t want to celebrate, you just didn’t see the point. Not when you were alone.

You enjoyed talking to your boyfriend Han about all the things he was doing with his family, the group chat between you and the boys was lively. You didn’t tell them how you were feeling, or that you were completely alone. They knew things were different this year, but you had hidden a lot of it from them.

You didn’t want to take away their joy of celebrating with their families after working so hard. They had all been gone for about a week now, and you admittedly did miss them. Their presence made it a lot easier for you to escape the threatening emotions lingering beneath. Now that they were gone, it was getting harder.

It was three days before Christmas, and you could feel it slowly getting harder to feel nothing.

When the boys asked you what you were doing, you never really lied, but you didn’t tell them the whole truth. Yes, you did bake Christmas cookies, but they were for your neighbors you barely even knew. You did decorate, by putting a wreath on your door, and setting out a couple cute pillows.

You weren’t necessarily sad or disappointed in not having a real Christmas this year. But you had to admit, it felt…empty. Nothing would feel the same again and you knew that. But next year, it will be different. It won’t be as difficult to find the familiar Christmas joy. But this year, you would have to grow comfortable with your own company for now. And just hope that the lingering feeling deep in your gut won’t become too unbearable.

You could do this. You can do it. It will be okay. You may be lonely now, but you aren’t alone.

Looking at the group chat as an array of messages came through, you smiled and scoffed at the jokes and playful insults. Something clenched in your chest, and you took a deep breath.

You had such a good handle on your emotions. You were doing okay. You’re okay.

“I’m okay.” You mumbled to yourself, trying to settle your quivering heart.

Setting aside your phone, you went back to reading your book, forgetting about the group chat, and missing the slow awareness by the others that you were slowly talking less and less over the last few days.

You were also unaware of the conversations going on in the group chat you weren’t a part of. The discussions of a plan nearly finished.

Did you think they wouldn’t notice? How you would slowly drop from the conversations that centered around Christmas. That you would be excited for everyone but give vague replies when it came to yourself. Did you think they didn’t know you were alone? That you were hurting in ways you were too afraid to worry them with?

You were family. Even if you convinced yourself, you weren’t as important as that to them.

Han tried to bring you back to visit his family with him, but you had to work. But he also knew it was because it would be difficult for you to adjust right now, to being in the middle of someone else’s Christmas, someone else’s traditions, you wanted familiarity. But you no longer had that.

It was Han’s plan originally, to go home as early as he could, celebrate with his family, and return to you. When the others heard this, they wanted to join too. They all knew how hard this year was for you. And how hard you were trying to hide it. They wanted you to know you weren’t alone, they didn’t want you to wallow in your own pain.

“Hello?” You asked with a smile as you answered Han’s call.

“Babbyyyy.” He said loudly, making you chuckle.

“Yes?”

“What are you doing?”

“I just went on a walk remember. Oh, then I stopped at a little café, but I’, heading back home now. How about you? Did you go to the market with your mom?”

“Nope!”

“Oh, then what?”

“I was preparing a secret Christmas surprise.”

“Uh oh.”

“Uh-oh? What do you mean uh-oh?!” His sassy tone made you laugh. “I’ll have you know it’s the best surprise I’ve ever pulled off!”

“Oh really? What is this surprise then?”

“I’m not telling you now!”

You laughed, “Oh come on! I wanna know!”

“You really wanna know?”

“Yes.”

“Let me ask you something first.”

“Okay?”

“Are you okay?”

Your heart jumped a bit, and you let out a soft laugh, though it was forced. “What?”

“You haven’t been responding to the group chat, and your texts with me are always vague. I wanted to know if you were lying about being okay.”

Your heart was pounding a bit now, “Why are you suddenly asking that?”

“Because I want you to know I noticed. That I didn’t miss it. That none of us did.”

You stopped in your tracks for a moment, how could you expect Han to not notice you weren’t okay? He noticed everything about you, even when he wasn’t there. It was one of the reasons you loved him so much. He saw you, in ways no one else did.

The boys too. They were always there when you needed them, even when you didn’t ask. They always noticed when you went quiet for a little too long. They noticed when you seemed withdrawn or evasive. And then they wouldn’t leave you alone until you told them everything.

Halfway through your walk today, you spent a little too long thinking about the things you no longer had. You cried. For the first time in a while. You had always stopped the tears before they fell, but today you couldn’t.

It was Christmas and you were so sad.

But Han made you smile, and you loved him for that. And now he was telling you he knew, somehow, that you weren’t okay anymore. That you failed at keeping it together.

“You knew this Christmas was going to be a hard one for me.” You said softly.

He asked if you wanted him to stay, to not go home, but you refused. You would not take that from him, no matter what was going on with you. So, he left, reluctantly, but he left.

“Of course I knew.”

You felt tears brimming in your eyes again as you reached your door. “I was just hoping I was wrong.” You finished softly.

“Hey baby?” Han’s voice was suddenly quiet.

“Hmm?” You unlocked your door, waiting for his response.

“Merry Christmas.”

As the door swung open, you came face to face with not only Han, phone still to his ear, but all of the boys, sitting around your living room. Their faces held smiles, as they anxiously waited for your reaction to them being here.

Your house was covered in Christmas lights and decorations. And in the previously empty corner, was a large Christmas tree. On the wall, a line of stockings filled with what you assumed was candy.

Littering the tables and floor were various loose decorations, tinsel and boxes. You assumed while you had gone out, Han, having his own key, snuck all of them in and they decorated your house as much as they could before you returned.

“Wh- how-“you hesitated as you looked around at them in surprise.

“Surprise!” They all cheered out, Changbin tossing tinsel in the air as Lee Know twirled around some ribbon.

Your eyes locked with Han’s as he slowly put down the phone with a grin. Unable to stop the sudden emotions that came over you, tears became obvious as you stared at them all, still in shock, but overcome with emotions you had been repressing.

Their faces changed from bright smiles to looks of concern mixed with relief. This is what they wanted, but they hated it at the same time. You needed to let everything out that you had been holding in. And now it was happening.

Han rushed forward and pulled you into a hug, the others stood around, allowing him the moment as you cried into his shoulder.

He gently swayed you as he hushed you and gently rubbed his hands down your back. “I know baby. But I’m here now, okay?”

Slowly, the others surrounded you, hugging you and patting your head, giving you comforting words and reassurance.

After a few moments you stepped away from Han and looked around at them before letting out a strangled laugh, knowing you must look terrible now. “Why did you all come here?”

“Because you’re our family Y/n.” Chris said as if it was obvious. “And we never leave our family alone.”

“We’re sorry we didn’t tell you we were going to come back.” Felix added in, “Originally it was just Han’s idea, then we all decided we wanted to surprise you too.”

“We hated that you were suffering alone without telling us.” Hyunjin broke in, a frown on his face.

You looked at Han, “You were always planning on coming back early?”

He nodded, “You told me I had to go see my family, I did.”

“But it’s Christmas.”

“Exactly!” Lee Know said with a somewhat harsh, but at the same time caring, tone, “And you were alone. That’s unacceptable.”

“We got to spend time with our families.” Chris started, “And now we are doing it again, here, with you.”

You sniffled again as another wave of emotions threatened to spill out. You wanted to protest some more, but you knew there was no point. They were here now, and even if part of you wished they hadn’t left their families for you, you were relieved, and so grateful that they cared enough for you to come back.

“Thank you.” You mumbled out as you repressed the urge to cry again.

Seungmin ruffled your hair, “Don’t cry anymore Y/n, you’re ugly when you cry!”

Turning, you smacked him, making him laugh, which in return made you smile. Changbin grabbed at him while jokingly cursing at him for what he said.

Han grabbed you and pulled you back into his chest as he playfully pointed threateningly at Seungmin before he wrapped his arms protectively around you.

After everyone settled down, and you had finished crying, for the most part. You sat down on the couches as the boys decided to surprise you with presents.

“What are all these?”

“We got you presents, duh!” Seungmin said as he waved one in front of your face.

“Oh, wait!” You said as you rose before sprinting off to another room. When you came back, you had a large box in your hand full of wrapped presents. “I planned to give these to you when you came back.”

There was a chorus of ‘awes’ and gasps as you set down the box of their presents.

“Gift exchange!” Han said happily as he pulled you into his lap.

As everyone playfully argued about who should open something first, you looked around at them with a grateful smile.

Yes, the heartache of change still sat heavy in your chest. But one thing that would never change was this. Your found family. The ones who knew you inside and out.

Han, who loved every part of you and accepted you. Who always made you smile and feel wanted.

And your friends, your brothers, who took care of you in ways you never had before.

Yes, things were different now, and the pain of that would still linger for a long time. But you had them. You weren’t alone. Not anymore, and never again.

xx End xx

And that's it for the 12 Days of Christmas 2024!

I know if sort of ended on an angsty note, but I hope you all enjoyed the fics!

((Taglist Form))

12 Days of Christmas Taglist: @multi-fandommaniac, @mbruben-stein

General Taglist: @charmsprout, @brattybunfornct, @bahng-chrizz, @otakutrash669,

@tinyelfperson, @pinievsev, @teenyfinds, @everythingboutkpop,

@shymexican, @stillwjk-channie-lixie, @alexxavicry

Stray Kids Taglist: @laylasbunbunny, @skz1-4-3, @prettymiye0n, @thunderous-wolf, @thedistractedwriter,

@briqnne, @dinossaurz, @carattinymoa, @stay3096,

@vnessalau, @3rachasninja, @life-is-a-game-of-thrones

Han: @dear-dreamie

#han jisung x reader #han jisung/reader #han x reader #han/reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids/reader #stray kids & reader #han imagine #han jisung imagine #stray kids imagine #skz imagine #12 days of christmas #kpop fanfic #kpop imagine

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deansapplepie · 21 hours ago

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Ya’re also good at keeping me on track

Summary: Your hands are hurt and Daryl take care of them.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader

A/N: Indulging myself a little since I’m sewing the crochet cardigan I’m making and my hands hurt.

You were the seamstress of the community, that had been your job for a long time. Making clothes edible to dress, fixing them and making them fit. A job that became worse when the winter was close. You always had much job this time of the year, you felt in your core the necessity to fix as much clothes as you could… to even make them if necessary, you just didn’t want your family, friends and all the children feeling cold.

Also because of that, your hands were always hurt. Your fingers were sore by pulling threads all day, the tip of your fingers hurt because of the times you accidentally sticked the needle on them. Your wrists were in pain by the repetitive movements, and your back… you didn’t even wanted to think about it.

All of that was forgotten by the end of the day, when your lover had to stop you and tell it was enough. “C’mere.” Daryl would gently say as he took the fabric and needle from your hand and put them away in a basket.

“I was just finishing this one…” You would almost pout when telling him, but definitely not fight, never fight. The way you saw this moment was like him saving you from yourself.

“Ya always say that sweetheart.” He said as he sat you on the bed. “Now let me see these beautiful hands.”

“I’m just worried people will be warm on winter.” You explained as you let him examine your hands.

“Well, I’ll look for clothes if that means ya’re not pushing yourself much.” Of course he would throw this card, always the provider, always scavenging for supplies.

“You won’t Mr. Dixon.” You replied, a serious but worried look on your face. “If I sew this much everyday is to guarantee you’re not risking yourself for it.”

“Looking for supplies is basically my job, darling.” He said as he ran his hands on yours with some cream and what scented as essential oil.

“Hunting is also your job.”

“Also risky, sunshine.” He pointed out while he finished his work on spreading the ointment.

“Anyways, sewing clothes is my job and the only thing I’m useful in the community. So… let me do it.” You answered and observed as he put some bandages around your hands so it would protect it from the sensitivity and let it absorb the ointment.

“Ya’re also good at keeping me on track.” He said as he finished his job.

“Cheesy.” You teased him.

“But ya love me.”

“I really do.”

You leaned forward and pressed a tender kiss on his lips.

Wanna be added to my tag list? Let me know. (Please tell me if you want to be tagged on everything or just specific series) Everything Taglist: @lilyevanstan1325 @hayley1998 @vaniniweenie @cupidelocke @avabh12 @whore4romance @dixondystopia @dixons-sunshine @bigbaldheadname @negansbestie @gabriella-aesthetic @fluffy-dixon @lunajay33

#daryl dixon #the walking dead #daryl x reader #the walking dead daryl #twd daryl #twd #deansapplepie #daryl fanfiction #daryl x y/n #daryl dixon x reader

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lunajay33 · 1 day ago

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Suppose to be You

•🖤🍑🏹🧟‍♀️•

Summary: You’re Shane’s girlfriend but when the apocalypse hits you find him changing and find yourself leaning more towards the only person who gives you the time of day, also you’re Rick’s younger sister

Pairing: Shane x f!reader, Daryl Dixon x f!reader

Warning: Shane’s a cheater obvi, harsh words, Merle

•Masterlist•

I first met Shane when my older brother Rick first started bringing him around the house, I never thought much of him but as we got older he started flirting and we only started dating when I turned 22, about a year ago, it’s been fun but then I lost my brother and then the world got taken over by walkers and that leads to now, camped out in a quarry on the outskirts of Atlanta

We took my sister in law, Lori and my nephew with us but after being here for a while Shane’s been treating me differently, like I’m just a burden to him

Sitting around the fire I’m sat across from Shane as he’s right next to Lori, I understand him wanting to console her her husband died, but he was my brother and I’m Shane’s girlfriend I just thought he’d try to console me even just a little

“You alright sweetie?” Dale asks from next to me

“Oh I’m fine thanks for asking though” I smile trying to brush it off but inside I’m hurting deeply like I’m loosing everything

“I think I’m just gonna head to bed early” I say standing up to leave, all Shane did was glance at me before his eyes went back to the fire, Carl got up and gave me a quick hug

“Night auntie y/n” he smiles, he’s always been the sweetest kid

“Night honey” I walk away as the cool of the night started to envelope me, instead of going back to the tent I went down to the quarry shore, I knew how to take care of myself around walkers I just need to be alone

I sat down feeling all the pressure weighing down on my chest, I lost my brother, then the world ends and now my boyfriend treats me like garbage, what else do I have…….whats the point

Finally letting the tears fall I let it all out before I hear branched snapping behind me, I turn nervously wiping the tears away sighing in relief when I realize it’s just Daryl Dixon, thankfully not accompanied by his ass of a brother Merle

“What’re ya doin down here alone” he asks his eyes squinted at me but for some reason he didn’t make me nervous

“Ummm just needed to get away, what’re you doing down here?”

“Just came back from a hunt saw ya down here……wanted ta check on ya”

My heart skipped a beat, something I haven’t felt in a long time now

“Come on let’s get ya ta bed” he huffed motioning back towards the path, it was a silent walk up to the camp but it was a comfortable silence

I got to mine and Shane’s tent when I hear his fast heavy footsteps heading our way

“The hell are you doing alone with Daryl Dixon” he groans gripping my arm and roughly pulling me away from Daryl

“Shane that hurts, he was just keeping me company�� I look back at Daryl and I swear if looks could kill Shane would definitely be dead on the ground

“Get lost Dixon, go back to your dick of a brother” Daryl’s eyes landed on mine and I could see them soften before he left, the further the got the more I wanted to run to him instead of being near the person I should be safe with

“The hell were you thinking”

“Like you’d care” I sigh looking down to the ground

“What’re you talking about you’re my girlfriend of course I care”

“I can’t do this right now Shane I just wanna go to bed, I think I’m gonna stay with Carl tonight, Lori can stay with you bet she’ll love that” I brush him off and walk past him to the smaller tent Carl and Lori stayed in, thankfully they were still out so I could just finally have a moment of peace

How could I feel more peace and safety around a redneck man that I barely know, than my boyfriend I’ve known almost my whole life

I quickly drifted off to sleep welcoming the darkness

•

I woke up early the next morning to the subtle chirping of birds, I quietly left the tent trying not to wake up a still sleeping Carl

Looking around there wasn’t anyone up yet so I went at sat at the camp fire that still had some embers burning

“Hey, what’re ya doing up so early” I hear next to me seeing it’s Daryl again, usually he’d have a snippy attitude with the others in the camp but lately he’s been nice to me and I honestly didn’t care why I just needed someone to cheer me up

“Just couldn’t sleep much I guess, I’ve got a lot on my mind” I say poking at the fire

“Here” he grunted handing me a granola bar he must’ve gotten from his stash

“Thanks”

Then he was gone dissapearing through the thick tree line most likely going for a hunt again

Slowly people started to filter out of their tents and start getting ready for the day, I see Shane making his way towards me with his typical scowl that he never use to use towards me, I look away and turn my back to him

“Have you calmed down since last night” I scoff looking up at him as he towered over me trying to scare me asserting his dominance

“Just leave me alone, you only act like I matter when someone else is giving me attention, tell me do you even love me anymore?” He paused for a moment before answering

“Of course you just gotta stop being selfish I’m trying to console a grieving widow”

“Yeah well he was my brother Shane, did you forget that, just get away from me” I brush past him going towards the trees for some peace and quiet but when I’m deeper in the woods I feel him behind me squeezing my shoulder and he pushes me against a tree

“Shane what are you doing let me go”

“You better watch your mouth don’t forget who saved you when all this started” now he’s trying to guilt trip me

“I could’ve made it on my own, I probably would’ve been happier alone” he raised his hand before a bow zipped between us landing on the tree next to us

“You touch her like that again don’t think I would beat your ass down” Daryl growled coming closer taking my hand and putting me behind him as he stared down Shane

“You think you could take me Dixon, you may be a filthy redneck but don’t think I won’t take YOU”

“Shane just go away, why don’t you go check on poor Lori” I say holding onto Daryl’s arm tighter out of fear, a fear I’ve never felt around Shane before

He huffed before tromping off back towards the camp, when he was far enough away I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding as I let all the emotions flood me

“God Daryl I’m so sorry to get you mixed in this, I don’t…..I don’t know why he’s like this, he never us to treat me like this and I’m…..I’m scared to be around him now” he takes both my shoulders in his hands and makes me face him gently

“It ain’t yer fault peach, I’ve been around my share of angry men and he’s a ticking time bomb, ya can’t be stay around him”

“If you can’t tell I don’t have no where else to go” my chest felt like it had a thousand bricks on it

“Ya can stay next ta me, we got an extra tent”

“Are you sure, what about Merle won’t he be mad”

“I can deal with that grump, come on let’s get ya settled” I’ve never heard Daryl speak so much but I can’t complain he’s like my saviour right now

•

We got the little tent sat up next to him that was a bit further away from the others but I didn’t care much, the further I am from Shane the better

“Thanks for all this Daryl” I say as we both finally settle down around the fire he sat up since night was falling

“Look at this, my lil bro got himself some tail” Daryl was cut of before he could speak by Merle’s grating voice as he plopped down across from us at the fire

“Merle give it up”

“She staying here now, good ta know we got some action right next door” he grins that sends unsettling chills down my spine

“I’m not doing that Merle for the thousandth time, I just needed some space”

“Finally figured out yer cop boyfriend is cheatin on ya?” My heart stopped, suddenly everything made sense, why he always stayed with Lori, why they’d both dissapear at the same time, why Lori could barely look me in the eyes

“Oh my god I feel so stupid how did I not notice I must look so pathetic to everyone” I groan as I drop my head in my hands

“He dont deserve ya, he’s the pathetic one” Daryl said softly as I heard Merle’s steps retreating into his tent, Daryl must’ve shooed him off

“You know why my brother first got shot I was a mess, couldn’t leave his side I was always so filled with anxiety I was basically wasting away but one day Shane convinced me to take a day to myself so I did, I went home and cleaned up and everything, the next thing I know Shane is busting in dragging me to the truck telling me everyone is dropping like flies and my brothers dead, then suddenly he treats me like a piece of trash, only Lori mattered, and…..he almost hit me today, that’s not the man I knew something’s wrong with him, sure he’s always been a bit hot tempered but this is different and all I can think about is……what is he comes after me again but no one’s there to help me” I sigh finally letting everything off my chest

“Ya ain’t goin no where alone anymore, I’ll protect ya” he said gently placing a hand on my back for a moment before it was gone again

“I can’t ask that of you, I’m not your problem”

“Believe it or not, yer the only person in this camp that doesn’t drive me up the wall, I’d like ta keep ya around a lil longer” he smiled as his words cheered me up a bit, I’ve never seen him genuinely smile and it’s making me feel all light headed

“Let’s head to bed……it’s been a long day” I stand up heading to my little tent as he did his next to mine

“Night D”

“Night Peach” his gaze stayed on me for a moment longer before he entered his tent, only making me think what life would be like if I had met Daryl first maybe I’d me happier

•

Part 2 is on its way!! Lmk how you liked this chapter

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bunnivez · 2 days ago

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˗ˏˋ 𝐘𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐬𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫, 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 ´ˎ˗

⟡ ݁₊ . Waking up early in the morning, you notice a nicely wrapped box with a pretty bow, on top of it— laid a nicely folded letter with your name on it. Upon inspecting the mysterious gift; you came to a realization of who the gift is from. Your heart flutters with warmth, it seems your lover didn’t forget.

˗ˏˋ ꒰ 𝐋𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ꒱ ˎˊ˗

Dear (Y/n), Merry Christmas to my pretty girl, hopefubly you didn't think I'd forget to get you a present. Honestly I feel kinda corny doing this, i'm not really used to it but 1 figured it would bring a smile to your face. Hopefully you like my gift, I actually made it myself. It took me hours, deadass; but you know i'll do anything for my baby.. Love, Zoya

You giggled softly at your girlfriend’s letter before unwrapping the small pretty box. You were met with a hard cover purple box this time, and inside it contained a beautiful handmade bracelet with beads of your favorite colors. It was honestly surprising to know Zoya made it, you’d think it would end up messy but it was actually the opposite. Well, you have to give her credit; she is a fast learner.

As you put on the bracelet you notice a small note at the bottom of the box; I’ll be picking you up at 2, make sure to wear something warm and easy to move on.! What does she have planned?

Dear (Y/n), Merry Christmas Princess! I Really hope you like my present, I thought it would look cute on you and it's really helpful, especially in this weather. Apart from that, it will come in handly later for what I have planned. I'll be picking you up around 11; pretty early, I know, but I promise it will be worth it, you'll see.. Love, Cinnabar

Your lips parted slightly as you read the letter; a date??? You set the letter aside and unwrapped the box. Inside contained a lovely fluffy sweater of your favorite color(s). It was very pretty and warm, Cinnabar was right, it looks very helpful with the cold weather. However, what exactly is the occasion?

You took some time thinking until you remembered. She mentioned once about wanting to ride her horse with you on a snowy day, specifically at a park she knew where the view was beautiful. You quickly get ready with a huge smile on your face.

Merry Christmas to my sweet angel <3 I hope you like my gift, I made it just for you, it took me hours but it was all worth it, especially when I know it will bring a smile to that sweet face of yours. I love you so much baby, and I hope my present brings you some comfort for when you need it and i’m not there. Once again, Merry Christma, angel… with lots of love and kisses, Garofano

You smiled as you read the letter, her handwriting was neat and beautiful, you’ll save it like the other letters she has written you. The way that even through letter— she still calls you her angel. Your eyes looked at the pretty, purple with green stripes box with a nice white ribbon on it. As you held the box, you realized it was pretty light, it didn’t make much noise either when you shook it.

Lifting the lid, you quickly gasp and take out the hand made gift Garofano made. It was a plushie of you! It looked so cute and silly; she added a lot of detail to the outfit. You hugged the plushie happily before whipping out your phone and sending a picture of you holding the plushie to Garofano, letting her know just how happy her present made you.

Меrry Christmas baby! Im your dear sweet santa clause this Christmas ho ho ho :p. You know, photos are very impertant. They capture and freeze moments and carry many memories. I sound really poetic now, but in sure you can already guess what I got you. Hopefully with this we can capture happy moments of our own… Love, Deren

You giggled and neatly folded the letter. Your girlfriend had a way of bringing humor even in letters and it always made you crack a smile. You opened the box, first undoing the pink ribbon. Inside the box laid two items, a Polaroid camera which you first notice, and a hard cover book. You smiled in excitement and grab the book first, opening it to see the first page covered in pictures of you and Deren— taken by herself.

As you turned the other pages, the rest were left blank. You glanced at the polaroid camera, Deren left the rest for you to fill on your own. Capture the happy moments in life and glue it all in the book to look back to. Oh once she comes back theres no way you will let her go.

────୨ৎ────

©bunnivez — do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or adapt my works without my permission.

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tinietaehyun · 1 day ago

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INVITE: Always & Forever

[Vampire!Beomgyu x Herbalist!Reader] [Part II - Sequel] [One-shot]

Pairing: Vampire!Beomgyu x Herbalist!Reader

Genre(s): Supernatural, romance, angst, action, forbidden!love, fantasy, thriller.

Contains: Profanity, mentions of biting, blood, injury, death, suggestive/mature themes, established relationship, graphic depictions of injury, violence.

Links: Invite (Part I) || Masterlist

Summary: His fangs graze your neck causing you to shiver, each night in his embrace and each day, walking hand in hand. A secret romance, a dark secret only you two knew, and if it came out to the rest of the villagers that the very vampire they were on the hunt for was the one you were courting? Then well… it’d certainly make things unfortunate wouldn’t it.

Just how long could you two slip away under the dark, keep your rendezvous a secret? Slip your love under the rug before it could end disastrously?

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I couldn’t protect you, sweet healer,” he breathes. You cup his cheek shakily, “You need not be sorry, Beomgyu. It’s them.”

Utter bliss, the warmth of your bare body against his felt heavenly against his own cold skin. How pliant, how soft, tender, the curves that he couldn’t get out of his mind— sweet moans, and gasps. It was indeed a night he’d not forget for a long time, if not ever.

You lay wrapped in his embrace, face nuzzled into his chest, hair dishevelled, the bite marks on your neck and shoulders now fading leaving a shadow of a memory. The only marks that remain are dozens of love bites littered across the canvas of your skin.

You both cherished moment like this. After a passionate encounter, the simple morning with the sun gleaming through the tattered curtains. You knew the moment you saw Beomgyu perched devilishly on your balcony yesterday night, it was bound to occur. A nuzzle here, a peck there. A small nibble of blood, he said, one more bite, he said. One thing led to the next, and in moment you two were in bed together.

It had been just over six months since you and Beomgyu had officially began courting each other (albeit secretly of course), the villagers had noticed that the number of attacks had declined massively. Of course they would, after all, you’d provide Beomgyu with just enough sustenance. He relished your blood like no other, loved the flavour and essence of it, he’d never get enough. He had always insisted that he wouldn’t feed off you daily, he wanted you to have strength, and not just use you as food, no matter how much you insisted it was fine.

From the loving look in his gaze, the way he cupped your cheek, ran his fingers through your hair, tightly wrapped his arms around you, you could tell this vampire, was utterly and astoundingly in love with you. And you? You were just as infatuated and deeply in love with him as he was. He took over your thoughts and despite your bickering (which you oh, so loved) — you couldn’t get enough of him!

His groan makes your eyes flutter open and you shift yourself to crane your head up to meet his gaze. Oh how beautiful he was, although not surprising for a vampire. His dark locks dishevelled, his gaze drops to meet yours, a spark of mischief lighting up in them, lips quirking into a smirk.

Before you know it, Beomgyu dips his head down nuzzling into your neck and inhaling deeply sending a shiver down your spine, followed by a quick nip to your earlobe. “Morning, little healer. How are you feeling? Do need to be patched up yourself?” He litters kisses up your neck making you giggle, his hair being ticklish, “I was rather rough, hm? I couldn’t help myself, just seeing you after you went on that two day herb expedition, it drove me crazy, you understand, right?”

You coo, running your fingers through his hair, “Mm, I’m not complaining.” He muses, “Yesterday, you definitely weren’t… in that case,” his hand trails down your waist and your eyes widen as you realise what he intends to do, “No, no! Up, up, up, you mischievous vamp, I have to open up the shop.”

He pouts, “Come now, sweet healer, surely your customers can wait for an hour…” he pauses, “Or two?” You playfully smack his shoulder as you wrestle your way out of his grasp, “Nope, no bargaining, no bartering, no concessions. I’m serious. Behave.”

He huffs, “My, my dear healer, so cruel to your lover. I just wished to show you how much I missed you.”

“You act as though I were gone for a week or two, it was only two days,” you hum amused getting ready to bathe. His eyes flit over your form as you rush around, “Those two days felt like two centuries, my sweet healer, you simply don’t understand.”

Rolling your eyes, you grab a towel, “Well, I can’t help you there, your perception of time seems to be rather warped, Beomgyu.” You pause, “Ah wait, you were careful right? I mean for food. I wasn’t there to feed you and-“

He sits up tousling his hair and he peers at your seriously, “I know, I know. You told me an uncountable amount of times before you left, to not be reckless or lose control. Do not worry, I stuck to cattle and a rabbit…mostly,” he grimaces, “Awful, by the way.”

You scoff, “Just animal blood right?” He sheepishly grins, “Uhm, maybe one human.” You glare, “I’m going to kill you, the villagers will have our heads on stakes. Both of us. They’ll think I’m a heretic. Or that I’ve been enthralled and kill you first and then me.”

As much as your relationship blossomed over these months, you both knew there one major issue that held you two back. His identity as a vampire — enemy of the village, a sadistic monster feared by all. And your identity as a mere human, siding with said monster, and heinously giving him your blood. That’d make you the child of the devil himself in the village leader’s eyes! They’d drive the both of you out; pitchforks and flaming torches and ruckus roars.

You shake your head removing that scary image. You didn’t want that, neither did he. So you both were cautious, incredibly so, or well, tried to be. It was hard, the village was a small place, there was always someone everywhere, eyes everywhere. You’d mostly meet up at night, where everyone mostly stayed indoors due to fear of…well your lover.

His arrogance and over-confidence in his ability to not get caught always set you on edge, made you paranoid. You chided him many times of course. Beomgyu sighs, “I’m sorry, I know, but… he was injured and well…it just, after that disgusting animal blood, I couldn’t help myself, you know?” You deadpan, “Just…you know we can’t afford to be careless. No one saw you right?”

“Yes, yes, I made sure no one was nearby and as usual erased his memory.” Your shoulders relax and you huff, “Two days and you can’t even wait for me.” He gets up stretching, your eyes flitting to the way his muscles flex, he catches your gaze with a smirk, “My offer for some morning fun still stands?”

You glare softly, “Very amusing, Beomgyu.” He shrugs, running his fingers through his dark brown locks, “A valiant effort from my end.” Shaking your head, you smile exasperated, “Anyway, we have to be careful, the villagers you know…”

Beomgyu walks up to you, wrapping his strong arms around you from behind as he nuzzles into the crook of your neck and murmurs, “I know, I know, sweet healer. You mean the world to me, the last thing I’d want is for you to be taken away from me.” His gaze noticeably darks and his grasp around you tightens, “I’d never let that fucking happen. I don’t care who I have to hurt.”

You twist around his arms with a smile cupping his cheek and then pinching it as he glares waving away your hand, “Are you cooing at me?” You pout, “So protective aren’t we? But I’d rather not have such bloodshed, no? We have to avoid such an outcome.” He presses his lips against your forehead tenderly before leaning his own against yours, “Mm, I suppose so, dear healer. Makes sense considering your occupation that you’d not want any casualties.”

You scoff and he murmurs, “I just think it’s a shame I cannot show you off, arm in arm, proclaim to the world that you are mine and mine alone. That we must hide.” You frown momentarily and sigh, “I…I know, Beomgyu. I’ve thought about it a lot too. But with the way society is and all..I’d not want to take the chance to lose you—even if it means utter secrecy.” He nods, eyes closing in bitter understanding.

Your days are spent in your shop preparing remedies with the much loved company of your salacious yet romantic lover. He made your dreary days and monotonous routines not so boring. He even accompanied you to collect herbs, worrying about you going into the woods by yourself.

You found solace in his arms and so did he in yours. His cold lifeless body felt lit with renewed life, as though he were truly living again. Everything about you, your endearing mannerisms, the way you spoke to him, that adorable look of concentration whenever you were using the mortar pestle on some particularly pesky herbs or how you’d gaze up at him with the most heart-stopping stare. All of it, everything about you just seemed to make life all the more worthwhile— something he could come back to each day, not just focusing on his pursuit of sustenance.

Meanwhile, your days were filled with a tender warmth and beautiful joy. Some days where he wouldn’t visit your shop, pester you like he always did, you felt empty. You relished the way his large hands fit with yours, the way his fingers intertwine with yours and squeeze reassuringly, his hushed whispers, his ticklish pecks along your neck. You adored it, and he adored doing such things to see your flustered and endearing reaction.

Although he was a pest whilst working, although you bickered back and forth, you knew he had your heart in his hands, without a doubt. From the way he gazed at you with such love, it was indeed the same for him.

Sighing, you grind the herbs in the mortar and yelp as you feel cold hands on your shoulders. His husky voice caressing your left ear, “Miss me, sweet healer?”

You peer over your shoulder with a snarky smile, “What makes you think that? Of course not.” You see the tip of his tongue flick over the point of one of his fangs in delight, a habit you noticed when he was in a playful or flirtatious mood.

“Oh really, hm? I find that rather hard to believe.” His hands trail down your arms leaving goosebumps before settling on your hips giving them a firm squeeze as he rests his chin down onto your shoulder. “Mm… so warm.”

You muse, “I’m beginning to think you’re a reptile with how much you adore my body heat.” He scoffs nuzzling into your neck, “Don’t be rude, I am not some pathetic snake or lizard.”

“You’re practically cold-blooded, in a sense, no? An overgrown reptile, but I suppose bat would be more accurate. Mosquito also works-“ You murmur amused as you continue adding more variety of herbs and plants to the grinded mixture. Beomgyu deadpans at you and you snicker.

Beomgyu huffs, “That’s a very ignorant assumption, healer. I’m wounded.” A chuckle leaves your lips, “Oh my poor Beomgyu, are your feelings hurt?” He rolls his eyes, “How, you torment your lover so, dearest healer, how cruel can you be? I flourish you with countless compliments, and this is how I get repaid?”

You feel him deeply inhale— he always did love your neck. Your scent, oh, and of course your blood. As twisted as it sounded, you couldn’t help but feel utter pleasure when he sinks his teeth into the crook of your neck, the scandalous gulps and slurps, the feel of his wet tongue lapping against your skin. It was all so much- even the mere thought of it had you writhing. However, he never took too much. Just enough, you always knew he was paranoid, claimed he had good control— which he did. There was no lapses or moments where you ever felt unsafe or in danger with him.

“Mm…” he inhales again, “….fuck, you smell exquisite.” You wince with a smile feeling his fangs graze your skin and you whine, “Beomgyu, I swear- I’m in the middle of-“

A brief peck lands on your skin as his hands caress your sides, “I know, I know, sweet healer, you’re in the middle of work. Don’t worry, I’ll behave myself, like a good vampire. Okay? No need to get yourself into a fluster.”

With an exasperated sigh, you resume your work. Your own desires and hungers making the simple task that you do for a living much more difficult to focus on— all the while, your lover clings onto your from behind content to bask in your radiating warmth.

As you pour the grinded mixture into a quaint glass bottle and plug it with a cork, he eases up from you with a stretch, “It’s your birthday soon, right?” Beomgyu asks with a playful gleam in his gaze.

You wrap some twine around the neck of the glass bottle, threading the label through it and you raise a brow, “…yes, why do you ask?” Beomgyu smirks with a shrug resting his hands into his pockets, “Mm, just wanted to spoil my lovely little healer that day. I had a few things in mind.”

“Such as?” You inquire curiously. He walks up to you placing his index finger atop your lips and whispers, “That’s a surprise.”

You scoff, “If it involves carrying me over your shoulder upstairs, and spending the night-“ His eyes twinkle, “Well, I won’t deny that outcome, but aside from that finale, I had a few other things in mind that day. As I said, sweet healer, a surprise.”

You mirror his smirk, “Alright then, Beomgyu. I look forward to it.” You’d be spending your birthday with him, for the first time. No, in fact it would be the first time you’d be spending your birthday, not working alone for once. The notion of this, makes your heart swell.

Beomgyu leans down cupping the back of your head placing a tender kiss on the tip of your nose and then on your lips, “You can wait a few days right?” You hum, “I can be the very picture of patience.” He muses, “Good.”

So, as you said, you waited, went about your days with him in bliss and most importantly anticipation. Indeed, it had been a long time since you were truly excited for your birthday— something you had always considered rather lacklustre, as ordinary as a normal day. But this time, things were different!

And so with great anticipation, you await the day of your birthday.

On that day, you wake up to find your vampiric lover perched on your window sill with a bouquet of fresh roses as the sunlight glimmers across his skin. With a flourish in his steps, he kicks off his boots, falling into your blanket as you wrap your arms around him in an embrace filled with laughter and affection. You take the blood-red roses admiring their beauty.

“Stunning flowers, for my stunning healer, happy birthday, my love,” he murmurs, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. The two of you make breakfast, nothing too special, but he was adamant that you closed shop today— claiming today was about you. That you would be fine not working for one day; that you deserve a break.

Reluctantly, you admit, Beomgyu was right. It felt good to not wake up so early, bustle downstairs, shovel your breakfast down and begin working, grinding powders, sifting, boiling and bubbling herbal potions and elixirs.

Putting on your nicest dress, you laugh as he tugs your hand, tugging you along the cobblestone streets pushing past other villagers— some looking at the two of you with disdain, others in envy and some in awe. Two young (well, one young) lovers hand in hand laughing— a perfect sight.

“I have quite the things planned for you,” he muses, squeezing your hand. You beam up at him, “Is that so? The anticipation is killing me!” He leans down, moving a stray strand of hair from your face and tucking it behind your ear with a tender smile (almost tender enough to make you forget what he truly is).

The day starts off with visiting the village bakery, where he buys you the treats that you mentioned you like. The delicious sweet bursts of flavour, butter, sugar and honey with a tinge of vanilla. Perfectly warm and crispy layers which breaks into a satisfying crunch as you bite down.

Followed by him dragging you along to the village market on the outskirts. Beomgyu always knew you enjoyed the various little trinkets and things they brought from other regions, whether it be useful for your occupation or something you personally enjoyed.

Both of you walk hand in hand admiring the various stalls. Pieces of rare jewels, rings and earrings, little bottles, utensils, charms, bowls, lamps, writing quills, cloaks— everything.

You gasp feeling the fabric of one dark blue cloak, “It’s so soft.” The merchant grins, “Fresh off the looks of the south, young lady. Wish to try it on?”

Beomgyu muses, answering before you could, “She would love to, isn’t that right? It’s your birthday, after all?” He glances at you taking the cloak. Beomgyu leans down, swooping the cloak around you, bringing it over your shoulders and hooking the clasp together, face inches from yours. Your heart races as you gaze at him; a dumb grin on your face.

“Birthday, eh? In that case I suppose I can shimmy the price down a little,” the merchant clasps his hands. Beomgyu gazes down at you with an expression of endearment, “You look truly lovely in this.”

“The young man‘s as right as rain, you look lovely,” the merchant gleams, “Now about payment…” Beomgyu and you deadpan as you mutter, “Oh of course. Should have known that compliment wasn’t genuine.” Beomgyu snorts.

You fumble with the clasp to take the cloak off and Beomgyu raises a hand signalling you to halt, as he places a small pouch on the wooden table. “I’ll give you half of what’s in here,” he bargains. The merchant takes a quick peek inside and grimaces, “I don’t know about that young man, this cloak is quite the-“

Beomgyu leans forward cupping his hand over the man’s ear as he whispers something and you see the man pale instantly. Your brows furrow as he abruptly takes the pouch pouring out half, counting the coins and the merchant beams waveringly, “Pleasure doing business with ya!”

Blinking confused, you question Beomgyu who seems to hum pleasantly leading you off. “Did you just pay for this cloak- you didn’t have to-“ He murmurs, “I wanted to.”

Your mind recollects the events and you muse dryly, “He changed his mind quick, what did you tell him?” Beomgyu leans down whispering into your ear, “I told him, I’d rip him limb from limb as soon as the sun sets and he closes up his stall.”

You stiffen peering up at him with a glare, “Beomgyu! I swear-!” The passersby look on at your scolding tone and he throws his head back laughing, “Oh, your expression- priceless!” He chuckles, “I was joking, sweet healer, no need to get in such a panic.”

Rolling your eyes, you scoff, “That’s what I thought. So what did, get him scared then?” Beomgyu muses, “You know the tavern I work at right? He’s a regular there. Drinks himself into a babbling fool every night after he closes up his stall here. Told him I’d make sure he’d never get a drink again.”

You sigh; of course that’s all it took for a drunkard to crumble. Shaking your head, you laugh breathlessly, “Seriously…you are something else.” Beomgyu smiles, “Yes, yes, I know little healer, I am a genius,” his expression becomes serious, “But really, I wanted to get you the cloak, you always mentioned how during your little expeditions to the forest, you would feel a little cold, so here. Secondly, I saw the adorable little sparkle in your eyes that you get when you really want something.”

You flush, were you that obvious? He took notice of all your little quirks and mannerisms with such ease? A touching warmth spreads throughout your chest, “Thank you, Beomgyu.” He grins, “You’ll have more to thank me for later, so hold off for now, okay?”

You both spend the day walking around the village enjoying each other’s company. It had been such a long time since you had felt such contentment, such…comfort.

As the sun melts into the horizon, he seems to joy dragging you with him as you pant. “Goodness, Beomgyu… I’m dying for breath here.”

He shushes you, “Oh come now, we’re almost there. You can hike all you want for your herbs but not for me, or for your birthday! This spot is one I’ve just recently discovered whilst hunting for deer.”

You grumble making your way up the faded path, pushing past the brambles and foliage, the steepness increasing gradually. After awhile, he finally pushes through some overhanging branches and vines like curtains and lets you go first.

Your jaw drops ajar as you see the sky, painted dark with sparkles of glitter— the stars. Twinkling and glimmering above. The last vestiges of subtle orange fading away into the horizon and the moon slowly shows itself behind the tuft of grey clouds.

You tilt your head down seeing the village from a slight distance away and you finally figure out where you both were. It was that small little set of cliffs nearby the village overlooking it. You’d never gone there before, fearing it was too much of a climb for you—especially alone. It wasn’t the highest cliff but just enough to see the village with its small hints of light from the houses.

“…so beautiful,” you whisper in awe as you sit down on the grass. Beomgyu sits behind you, you scoot yourself back— your back resting against his chest, elbows resting on his thighs. His head on your right shoulder and his strong arms around you.

The subtle sound of your breathing merges with the sounds of the breeze, rustling trees, the hooting owls, chirping crickets and low gargles of toads. It was simply amazing, so serene, so peaceful.

“I love this,” you softly say. Beomgyu mumbles, “I love this too. I figured you would like this spot. I only discovered it a few days ago, I never expected to bring you here— but it just struck me when I sat here two days ago. It would be the perfect way to end off the day.”

“It is,” you breathe, closing your eyes, “It really is.” A pause of comforting silence ensues and you smile, “Thank you for everything, Beomgyu.”

You crane your head to gaze up at him, seeing the gentle moonlight caress his visage in a hauntingly beautiful manner. “Thank you…for doing all this. I never thought any of this was possible for me.”

“Why?” He questions, “You are deserving of love, is everyone not?” Your eyes glisten, “Yes. Yes they are, but it’s unfortunate, this world. Not everyone gets the privilege of it. Of such tender love like this.” You both go silent. Beomgyu cups your cheek, thumb caressing your cheekbone, “Indeed. Sweet healer, it is as you said. Nevertheless, I am glad I have you.”

He litters kisses down your neck, “All mine.” Beomgyu nuzzles the curve of your neck, “I’m all yours, yes?” A breathy giggle leaves your lips as your hand reaches back up into his luscious brown locks, “Yes, Beomgyu. All mine.”

As you lay your head against his firm chest, you feel his arms leave your sides and your brows furrow going to turn around and he chides playfully, “Stay still, sweet healer. Always in such a flurry.”

“What are you-“ you ask only to see a glistening pendant dangle down in front of your vision before gliding down onto your neck as he fastens the clasp on the back of your neck. The cool metal makes the hairs on your skin rise; your skin prickles with shock and cold.

Your lips quiver as you fiddle with the small pendant. A simple black metal heart. You gaze back at him, eyes watering and spluttering emotionally, “Beomgyu, you already bought me that cloak- the baked good- you spent so much-“

Amused by your babbling, he shushes you softly, “Relax, relax…sweetheart. No need to fret, I had bought this necklace a month back. I had seen another man make a necklace for his wife. I had thought it was a good idea, seeing that you liked jewellery, but often wear the same few.” He touches the heart nestled just above your chest, “This way, you may be reminded of me, even when you go out on those trips of yours. Or when I am not around.”

You glance at his neck, empty. You pout, “I wish we could match.” Beomgyu sighs smiling, “Ah well, one necklace was quite the pretty penny, my lovely healer, so your dear lover must be without a matching necklace,” he muses leaning down, “For now that is.”

You coo, “Then it’s settled, on your birthday then.” Beomgyu smirks, the one you love very much. “Don’t even think about it.” You twist back around, “Too late, we’ll be matching soon enough, or at least before the end of next year.”

Beomgyu snickers, “Far be it from me, to dissuade you.” His hands rest back on your waist and you both continue in tranquil conversation. The air is hazy, flirty and warm; gentle touches and caresses become more daring, his hands sliding and groping gently making you writhe at a loss for breath.

His fingers glide along your bodice, his other trailing down your skirt, gathering up the fabric. Tensions rise, the pent up desire which lingered throughout the day, all bubbling up at once with the moon as your witness.

Beomgyu whispers, “I think one more gift should make things just about perfect, should it not?” You whisper back playfully, “Is that so? What were you thinking?”

He hums, fangs grazing your neck, hands becoming increasingly bold, “Something I know you like very, very much. So do I, in fact.” You reply breathily, “I see, then by all means…” you trail off.

As much as the two of you wished to embrace each other under the stars, secluded in this little haven, it seems nature had different plans. Your quaint little fear of random beetles alongside the mosquitos nipping at you were quite frankly spoiling the heated mood.

You huff as you both walk back grumpily down the path and he snorts, “Easy now, sweet healer, we can have so much more fun back at your place, no? No need to look so down.” You glance at him, sneakily murmuring, “You also looked rather disappointed, you know.”

Beomgyu shrugs, lips cracking into a stupidly wide grin as laughter tumbles out of him, “Well, it is a shame when we were just getting to the good part that a large beetle decides to fly in the midst of our passionate lip lock. That scream,” he cackles almost stumbling over a rock, “Oh- that was hilarious.”

Deadpanning, you rip away your hand with a huff, “Of course it was funny to you, it wasn’t attempting to land on you. Stupid thing. Couldn’t it see we were busy?”

He snickers, “Well, perhaps none of the creatures wanted a show.” You scoff, rolling your eyes as he grabs your hand again, “Tsk, don’t pout, sweet healer. I’ll make up for lost time,” his tone darkens deliciously as he nears your ear.

You both reach the village streets, most had retreated into their homes, of course due to the curfew and fear of the oh so terrifying vampire. The very vampire you were walking hand in hand with. The streets were most empty, a few stray cats and dogs running here and there, one or two people closing their windows.

A few eyes linger your way but nothing is said— they had most likely suspected that you were both returning home. You murmur, “Huh… it really is so quiet out here. Scary actually without a lot of the lights. Once everyone’s shutters are shut, it looks completely different.”

Beomgyu remains unfazed, “It’s alright.” You scoff, “You say that because you hunt at this time. Be it human or animal.” He smirks, “Well, what can I say? My vision is simply superior in the dark. It only makes sense.”

You snicker, “They’ve all gone to bed and shut their windows, because of you. This entire curfew is because of you. To think they’re all scared of you.” His brows furrow, “What’s that supposed to mean? You make it sound as though I am not a predator.”

You pause regarding him from head to toe and he huffs. “Maybe not to you per se, but I am a predator nonetheless.” You shrug walking ahead, intentionally provoking him, “I don’t see it. To be fair, when we first met you actually were a little bit scary, but now, you just seem so soft and-“

Before you could get the words out, you find yourself being tugged into the nearest alley between two houses, wrists pinned beside your head. Beomgyu’s eyes take on a dangerous otherworldly glow, he leans down, “Is that so? We can’t have you forgetting what I am, can we? I seem to recall you relishing when I sink my fangs into your neck and drink that sweet, sweet sanguine nectar, hm?”

You shiver, “So?” You challenge and he smirks devilishly, “Oh no, I meant nothing by it. You’ve always been a little different than your cowardly villagers. Twisted little thing, aren’t you? Not that I mind, of course.”

You tilt your head to the side, your hair falling away from your neck salaciously, you smirk to yourself seeing his gaze flit down to your neck. Beomgyu’s voice huskily hums, “Oh, I see what you’re doing.”

You feign innocence, “Hm?” Beomgyu hums alluringly, “Ah, wanting to get bitten? On your birthday too? My, my, sweet healer, you’re more depraved than I thought.”

Well, you couldn’t help it when it always felt so good— and it almost always led to a rather pleasurable outcome. You shrug, “I don’t know what you mean.” He parts his lips showing his fangs about to sink down before a loud clattering sound shatters the intense moment.

Beomgyu pulls away and you shakily place a hand over your palpitating heart. Wait. You shake your head clearing your mind. What the hell were you two thinking? You were both in public— the streets, whilst rather empty, were not completely free of people. Anyone could have passed by!

You clutch your head panic filling your system, “Beomgyu, we shouldn’t have been so reckless- we got so carried away and if it weren’t for that we’d have foolishly continued-“ you begin rambling. He holds your arms calming you down, “Hey, hey, sweet healer, easy now. Easy. No one saw us. Look?”

He pulls your reluctantly form out of the alley and points toward the crate of bottles that had been tipped over, “Just crate tipped over, probably some stray dog or cat. You know how it is. Look around, not a single person in sight.” Beomgyu squeezes your hands, “But you’re right, we were reckless. Let gets home, don’t worry, okay? We’re okay. We’re okay.”

You nod calming yourself. Thank goodness you didn’t let it continue into him biting down into you. You couldn’t take that chance of any passerby just randomly taking a glimpse in.

As you both arrive at your place, the door slams shut, impassioned kisses, giggles and embraces fill your room as you both wish to carry on where you left off.

As his fangs sink into your soft flesh eliciting a gasp from your lips, you feel the sensation of doubt creep in the back of your consciousness. A crate like that… could it really have been knocked over by a mere cat or dog? It seemed so heavy.

No…it was fine. Beomgyu showed you the empty street— you saw with your own eyes, not a single soul out there. So why were you anxious?

And so, you forcibly shove that thought back into the recesses of your mind, as your hands tangle into his hair as Beomgyu gulps down the heavenly sanguine.

It would be fine.

That’s what you wish you could say. How wrong you were. The thought, that very thought about the crate being heavy— heavier than a small cat or dog could knock over.

You wished it had been a large dog or something of the sort. Not a person. You both had thought you had been sly, caught yourselves in the alley before you got too reckless.

But no, it was too late. It was too late when you heard the ruckus in the early hours of the morning. A grumbling roar of distress and anger outside your window. You sit up abruptly as you focus on the chants.

“Traitor! Scum! Come out! Come out! Vampire! Vampire!” Your heart drops. This had to be a nightmare!

Various other insults are thrown at your house by what you assume is a large gathering in front of your house ready to barge in at any second. You hear the clatter of metal and wood.

Beomgyu seems to be up already and you see him hastily getting dressed, lacing up his boots. You see the tension in his brow, the shaking of his hands, his shaky breaths. He glances up and he murmurs, “You’re awake. Oh, Y/n…” his voice cracks.

Instantly you find your eyes watering. Indeed, it seemed yesterday really was too good to be true. He rushes over cupping your cheeks, “Get dressed, my love. Look at me. Look at me,” Beomgyu grasps your chin, “I’ve got you. I won’t let anything happen to you okay?”

Tears stream down your face as you cover his hands with yours, sobs wracking your body, “Oh Beomgyu, I..” you can barely get the words out as you hyperventilate, “I’m… I can’t believe this— why- we were doing so well-“ He cups the back of your head pulling you in for a tight embrace. You hear the pain in his voice as he soothes you, “I know, I know. I thought…I thought we could keep it a secret too.”

As always, the universe had its cruel way of exposing any and all secrets one way or another. Two foolish lovers who had the gall to be happy with each other.

Beomgyu tilts your head up to meet his gaze and he firmly utters, “Stay focused. We…we need to get out of here.”

The roar of the crowd outside and clattering makes it difficult for him to focus. Your heart pounds as you get up hastily putting on your dress. He paces around, “I… I had thought it was a stray or something, I didn’t expect… someone to have watched us.” Beomgyu threads his fingers stressfully through his locks.

Clumsily, you lace up your boots and gaze at him. Cautiously you make your way to the shutters and ever so slightly peek down. A gasp escapes your lips and your knees buckle at the sight— nearly half the village there in front of your house chanting and roaring, pitchforks and torches in hand as the dangerous hue of dawn paints their faces.

They had one intention. To get rid of the vampire that lurked in the village, your lover.

And then get rid of you. A traitor.

Fraternising with…a demon, a bloodsucker.

“Open the door, herbalist and surrender willingly or we will break in!” A man’s voice bellows— presumably the village head. Quivering, you gaze at Beomgyu, who’s gaze has hardened. Even he looks unsure as to what to do.

He helps you stand with a hand and he finally speaks tensely, “Do you trust me?” You’re caught off guard by the question. Beomgyu repeats, this time more firmly, “Do you trust me, Y/n?”

You nod, the words, “Yes, of course,” leaving your lips breathlessly. He takes your wrist guiding you downstairs and you follow clumsily. You see your back door in the kitchen. Beomgyu snarls seeing them banging on it too— that route wasn’t an option.

Your entire house groans and creaks— any second they were about to barge in, rip him to shreds and do god knows what, to you!

Once again he leads you upstairs; grip borderline painful on your wrist and he opens the shutters wide making your eyes widen and the crowd’s chants fall silent. You stammer, “Beomgyu- what are you-“

Beomgyu’s gaze blazes fiercely into yours, “Take my hand.” You peer at his hand before taking it and he hoists himself onto your rooftop. He pulls you up effortlessly onto the rooftop and you scream as a roof tile falls below but he has you securely in his arms.

The crowds goes into uproar calling you terrible names, calling him a monster, you as his thrall. Panting, he commands, “We are going by rooftop, you hear me? Get on my back.”

He hoists you onto his back and you cling on dearly as he runs with superhuman speed, jumping across the rooftops on your street. The crowd’s roar increases as they follow along in pursuit. You close your eyes wishing to block all this out— you wish the entire earth would swallow you whole.

Why did this entire thing have to happen? Tears wet your cheeks again.

Rooftop to rooftop, he stumbles, patchwork nearly collapsing at one point, roof tiles going flying into the crowd below before he makes a risky jump onto the ground, you both fall to the floor rolling and you hiss in pain, the ground grazing your limbs painfully.

You barely have time to register your injuries as he roughly tugs you up, “Up, up, up!” You cry out as you push yourself to stand and you both run.

You hear the village head again, “Over there, by the arch! They’re headin’ out of the village! Men! Go, go, go!”

You weep and he snarls breathing heavily, “I’ve got you, healer, please, focus, focus for me. Just a little more, just a little- ah, more!” Your legs burn immensely, lungs searing for breath, wind flaps through your hair.

Over-exertion hits you, knees buckling and you sob, “Beomgyu, go- I’m only holding you back,” you cry out, “Just go-“

Anger is visible on his visage and enraged he snaps, “I’m not leaving you for them to punish you, you’re mine. You’re who I love, what lover would I be to sacrifice you for my own escape? Don’t be fucking stupid.”

You sob, shaking your head, “Beomgyu-“ In agitation, he hoists you onto his back and you yelp, clinging onto his neck, “Keep that mouth shut, got that? I’m not leaving you behind.”

With inhumane speed and agility, he winds his way through the trees. You realise where he’s taking the both of you, winding up the familiar harsh terrain. That spot on the cliff, notoriously hard to reach. The people would struggle and it would give you enough time to at least gather yourselves, see where you should head next.

You gaze behind, the crowd no longer in view, their sound growing fainter and fainter and soon you both stand in the same spot. The morning sun in full shine. You hug him tightly, “Beomgyu…” He hugs you back littering your forehead with kisses of desperation, “I know.” You whimper, “They’ll kill you. They’ll kill you, Beomgyu. I can’t…”

Beomgyu caresses the back of your head murmuring, “You don’t think it’s that easy, do you? I don’t die easy. Unless they have got silver or a huge stake, neither of which I saw in that crowd.” He peers down at you cupping your cheek, “Maybe garlic perhaps, the real weapon.”

Harshly, you smack his arm, sniffling, “Now’s not the time for joking.” He smiles painfully, “Alright, alright, but they’re definitely struggling up the incline that’s for sure. I don’t think they saw where we went, it’s hard to see in that dense foliage anyway. We have a little breathing room.”

You murmur, “I don’t want to risk it. We’ve got to get moving. Not everyone is going to give up so quickly, Beomgyu. There’ll definitely be a few who attempt to come up here. We’ve got to move.”

Beomgyu nods, gaze hardening, “Yes, if I remember, there’s another town just to the East,” he points out over a rocky outcrop, a faint path leading into some woods, he continues speaking, “We can’t stay there for long, they’re awfully weary of vampires in that town, but it’s ideal for a night’s stay. Then, in the morning, we can journey up further East. There’s a few more villages and towns that way—following the river. The further we get, the better. North is out of the question-“

As he speaks your gaze flits to behind him and you feel your entire soul leaving your body as you see a small glimmer in the foliage and before the scream leaves your mouth, the arrow coated in a metallic substance flies and swivels elegantly in the air.

You instinctively shove Beomgyu out of the way, almost off the cliff— the arrow missing him just enough to lodge itself into your neck. A choked gargle escapes your throat and you feel a metallic iron taste fill your mouth.

The village head scraped up and bruised tumbles out of the foliage with his bow in hand, a few more arrows ready.

Beomgyu freezes for a moment— gaze flitting between the village head and you. His lips part, but no breath escapes him. The village head bellows, “You foolish woman— that was meant for the vampire! No matter—“ He sheathes another arrow positioning it— but before he could even aim it, you see red.

Red, a lot of red. Your knees buckle. You gaze at the liquid dripping down your chest, a bloody mixture of silver and blood. Blood drips down your chin—- vision blurring.

Truly, you were a fool. Most of those in love were fools. He could have handled that himself, why did you play the hero? You didn’t know.

Your body just instinctively moved by itself. How stupid, to protect him. Protect what? A vampire? You knew silver was a poison— leading to deaths for vampires if not treated.

So? Did you really have to push him aside and get it shot in you instead?

You see more red, this time not your own. Your vision goes in and out of focus as you witness Beomgyu like you’ve never seen before.

Blood spraying, agonising screams, flesh tearing, bone snapping, disgusting squelches. You gather from the image in front of you, just how vicious your lover could be when he wanted to.

From the disheveled locks partially covering his gleaming dark red irises like some sort of veil of death to his hands covered and dripping in blood and god knows what else of what was left of the village head.

Beomgyu saw red and so did you. He killed right in front of you. Tore a man limb from limb. For you.

Tears drip down your face from the searing pain; you collapse onto your side making his head snap toward you, breaking him out of his bloodthirsty rampage.

Within seconds, he’s by your side cradling your weakened form, curses falling from his lips, enraged words aimed at the humans from the village. His voice cracks, “Oh my sweet, sweet healer, why? You are so…” he closes his eyes bellying his anger, “I told you, I could handle it. Handle everything. Why couldn’t you just sit back? Did you not think I…” he chokes up.

Beomgyu sniffles as tears run down his icy blood splattered cheeks, “You fool. You fucking fool, I can’t believe…” he clutches you, “Those fucking bastards, arrows coated with silver.”

You weakly gaze up at him, unable to move, unable to speak, not even a pitiful rasp. All you could do was stare up at his pretty face.

Perhaps, this was fate, you think. How it was meant to be, your consequences of mingling with the supernatural, not staying within your confines. He gazes at your neck and you see his red eyes darken, fangs glistening. You wonder, what was he thinking?

Finally, your vision goes dark— you don’t seem to be hurting anymore, rather you feel as though you’re wrapped in a cold embrace, on a winter’s night. Frigid, alone but painless.

As you go limp in his arms, panic surges in Beomgyu’s system, as he shakes you. He splutters, voice shattering, “No, no, no,” he pants out, “Wake up, fucking wake up.”

Beomgyu gazes down at your neck. He couldn’t let you go. He didn’t know… would you be content to die, or would you be happy to join him in his eternal prison of immortality?

He couldn’t ask you—- what would you want? Did you love him so dearly you’d be willing to spend an eternity with him? Was he delusional to think that way?

Was he selfish for what he was about to do? Would you hate him for turning you into what he was? He didn’t care. He wanted to see you alive, or alive in at least some sense of the word.

Was it a punishment or renewal? So, so many questions. But with each second, his chances of saving you were slim.

Thus, Beomgyu leans down, with a grimace he pulls the arrow out, blood spurting onto the grass. He whispers, placing a kiss atop your head, “I’m sorry, my dearest healer, for what I am about to do. Forgive me.”

With that, his fangs sink into the other side of your neck, as his hand cradles the back of your head. He gulps, downing every drop of your life source, the rich flavour he once craved now seeming horridly bitter. Tears roll down his face as he continues drinking and draining you of your blood.

Tormented apologies mentally scream in his mind as he resumes his onslaught. Would you hate him for this? Would you have preferred death?

Rustling occurs behind him but he doesn’t care. He had to drain you before the warmth left your body, before your systems shut off completely.

A few men poke their heads out of the foliage and stumble back mortified at the bloody scene, what was left of their leader, the sight of Beomgyu feeding mercilessly on what seemed to them as your corpse.

It was enough to have them running off, wretching and almost fainting. Let them run for now. He’d hunt down each one of them if this did not work out. Make everyone of these foolish villagers pay.

With a final grunt, he pulls away, gazing down at your lifeless body; stiff and pale. Only the tiniest hint of blood left in you.

Beomgyu grunts, taking your body into his arms and he begins walking, he needs to get you somewhere to rest, to be without stress or threat. Would you even wake up? He didn’t know, did he take too much? There had to be just enough left— he had never drained someone before, never turned someone.

If you did never wake up— he’d never forgive himself. Taking your blood on top of that for no real outcome. He shudders at the thought. No. You had to.

Hours pass, darkness, utter silence. Nothingness. The crackling of fire in the distance soon arises, a faint breeze brushing against your skin makes you writhe. One by one, you could feel your face, your limbs.

One by one, more and more noises around you pile up, layering atop one another, your senses fall back into place and you feel your chest grow not warm, but deathly cold.

Finally, as your lungs will with air, you inhale as deeply as you possibly could.

“Y/n! Y/n- oh my god, Y/n- you’re breathing,” a muffled voice resounds and instantly your eyes snap open. You sit up abruptly clutching your chest.

Your heart- wait, your heart.

You feel your chest as you pant raggedly for breath. No heartbeat. Your skin…no longer that comforting warmth. Your ears ring painfully and memories flood your consciousness as you groan clutching your head.

“Gently now, oh fuck, fuck, fuck, oh goodness, Y/n. My sweet healer, my love,” you hear the presence beside you call out cradling you in his icy arms. You glance up wearily and see him.

Choi Beomgyu.

His eyes glistening, a single tear drips down. He was crying. The orange hues of the crackling fire paint his face as he cups your cold cheek, “You’re alive. I… I didn’t think you’d make it. I-I thought I took too much.”

Took too much? You glance at your hands. You gasp— your neck! The arrow. You feel your neck feeling no scab, no injury. “My injury… Beomgyu-“ you stammer. He glances at you in silence as he takes your hands, “Y/n…I..”

Your body lacks warmth, your heart no longer beats, there’s a scratchy dryness in the back of your throat. Your horrendous injury, now, miraculously healed without so much as a scar or scab.

The pieces click into place forming an astounding conclusion. You whisper, afraid, “You…you, turned me?”

His silence has all the answers you need. You glance down at your hands, you were…alive. That meant you had experienced death.

He had brought you back…this time to the land of the undead. Of the immortal.

You were one of the same.

Beomgyu’s voice cracks, “You must despise me for making that choice for you. I… I couldn’t-“ he struggles to get the words out, “I couldn’t let you die. I couldn’t stand the thought of your life being taken.” He gazes at you with such a pained gaze, “I love you, I love you far too much to let you go, is that too selfish of me? Did I bring you back against your wishes?”

Your lips part, words not coming out, as you tremble, tears dripping down your cheeks at the impassioned words. He murmurs weakly, “Forgive me, my sweet healer, for being so selfish. You have all the reasons to despise me. But…I just couldn’t…couldn’t let you die.”

You sadly smile wiping away his tears with your thumbs, “I don’t hate you, you fool. You saved me.” His eyes widen, going speechless; lower lip quivering at your words. You sniffle with a wavering laugh, “I…I’m surprised, I… I would have never thought you’d turn me. I thought you’d never cross that boundary just because,” your voice cracks, “just because it’s me.”

He presses his forehead to yours chidingly, “I’d have no need to do such a thing if you did not play hero, you idiot,” he sighs pained, “Do you understand how horrible it was to see you bleeding out, life draining from your eyes? With an arrow meant for me? Not you?”

You cup his cheek nuzzling his nose with yours, “I know…I should have stayed down. I’m sorry for scaring you, Beomgyu.” He trembles, “I…having to drain you, I..” he murmurs shakily, “Never again. Never again.”

All of a sudden, Beomgyu embraces you tightly, his head in the crook of your neck, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry I couldn’t protect you, sweet healer,” he breathes. You cup his cheek shakily, “You need not be sorry, Beomgyu. It was them.”

For a few minutes you stay like this, in each other’s arms, sat atop a log beside a fire. You gaze up at the forest foliage above, you had many questions as to how you got here, how long had you been out. But for now, you were simply content to be in his arms, with him.

Beomgyu whispers, “Your life…that you left behind, your precious little shop, my sweet healer. You left that behind because of me, I’m so sorry. We’ll… we’ll set up a new one elsewhere, far away. I’ll make sure of it.”

Your cold lips press a kiss onto his own before you wearily gaze into his eyes, “I know you will. But for now, Beomgyu. One step at a time.” You shift yourself to lean against his chest, “I feel tired.”

He hums softly, “Then sleep. I’ll be there for you when the dawn next comes. And the next, and for many more.”

You muse half deliriously from drowsiness, “Until the end of time?” A scoff leaves his lips at your audacity, not even having fed, a newborn vampire at best and yet…

Beomgyu smiles tenderly as he repeats in assertion, “Until the end of time, sweet healer. Until the end of time. Always and forever.”

Taglist:

@beomnioa @gyu-tori @immelissaaa @haowonbins @hyunelixbun @woncheecks @dalkom-han @tyongluvs @tubaturighthere @lun4mizuka @blazesimps @usuallyunlikelyfox

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maudie-duan · 3 days ago

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Summary: What happens when the man you've loved since childhood decides he's ready to settle down, but it turns out you are no longer his forever. How would you cope with the sudden engagement? For Blair, it's a hard pill to swallow, knowing that the beautiful girl smiling in all his pictures will get her forever. I guess it's a blue Christmas this year.

A/N: I have to make a confession: I hate Christmas music, but the first time I heard Sabrina Carpenter's 'Cindy Lou Who' I knew this was my kind of Christmas song. I love a sad song, and this song feeds my "angsty soul," So please give it a listen before you read. This whole story is my interpretation of the song. Hope you like it. Happy Holidays enjoy!!!!

Requests: Here

Word Count: 6K

Warning: Mentions of Sex, Strong Angst and Langue, Family Dynamics, Mentions of Pregnancy, Heartbreak.

I don’t think sneaking my ex-boyfriend out of my parent’s house is the best look for anyone on Christmas morning, but technically, it’s still Christmas Eve if you haven’t gone to sleep yet, right?

To be fair, he was the one knocking on my window, stumbling his way to my bed. Casually, bringing up the past, circling back to things I thought I had already unpacked with my best friend after I scrolled his girlfriend’s social media, backtracking five years, to be honest, she had me broader line obsessed.

He made his way to my bed and in between my legs, touching place and sharing space in the best way we knew how, and that’s the funny thing about having history with someone—sometimes it makes it harder to say no when it’s knowingly what you want the second they step foot into a place that once served as a sanctuary to you both—a garden where words weaved trust, that turned into secrets, carving out a space of our very own; a world that we created and while he wasn’t my first kiss he was everything else.

I’ve lost track of how many times our words of forever were passed between our mouths, tangled in shared breaths of “I swear until the day I die, I’m yours.” When you’re young, you believe it because it’s all you have—and we took that with us when we thought we were ready for the world—two foolish kids on an endeavor to forge these grown-up dreams of a grand gesture without a second thought, only relying on the word “love,” like love could weather any storm.

The hardest lesson we learned was that love isn’t always enough. Sometimes, you can love someone with all your being and forget that they’re not a possession—but a person. Was that our mistake? I don’t know, but we wanted to be our own people at some point and find ourselves outside of only identifying as “we.”

Let me tell you, that’s a hard pill to swallow, and from time to time, I still find myself choking on it, especially when it is obvious we still click—we didn’t need sex to know that we still worked, fit together like a puzzle that had been forgotten, and dusted off, only to find that you still had every single piece. Still, when Harry tried to kiss me goodbye, I pulled away.

“Hey—what is it…tell me?” he asks

“Nothing…it’s just late. You know how my mom is about Christmas morning.” I lie because the reality of his leaving is starting to sink in. I’m not ready for him to leave, but we both knew that there would be an ending to this.

He laughs, attempting to shrug his jacket on, and I glimpse the joy of the familiar memory dance across his features, “Yeah, she can be kind of crazy, right?”

“Yeah—but not any crazier than your mom,” I laugh.

“Hey now—actually…you know they kind of feed off each others crazy…” He says, fighting to find the sleeve of his jacket, and when I reach to help, something falls from his pocket, a loud thud clashing against the hardwood floor. I look down, thinking he knocked something off my shelf, but then I see it.

We both stare at the ground, a small box lying in the space between us, “You shouldn’t have…” I declare, bending down—Looking back now, I don’t know what I was thinking—You know this tends to happen when you rely on your wit to get you out of awkward situations. I thought it would be cute and clever. I would open the box, and it wouldn’t be exactly what I knew it was—a ring, but not just any ring—the ring.

“Hey—hey—hey…give me that,” He jokes, trying to turn it into a game, but I’m in too deep to give it up. I can only focus on getting a peek at the ring, which is now a broken promise, and right this second, I’m desperate enough to open this box—basque in the feeling of the “what if” this was mine.

I turn away, shoving his hand out of the way, compulsively straining to get a look at this ring, immediately getting aggressive when he tries to reach over my shoulder. “Stop Harry—” I urge.

“Come on, Blair—this isn’t funny…” He says, unamused, but he’s too late, and as I shove my elbow into his ribs, the box is flipping open, the glint of the diamond catching the light of the moon shining through the window. He stops then because what’s the use, right? Here it is—the ring—perfect, everything I would have wanted. It’s almost like a slap in the face, like he looked back on one of the many pictures I sent over the years, thinking one day this would be me.

The ring is stunningly beautiful. There is so little light yet it’s drawn to every facet; immaculate, precise cuts creating the perfect sparkle. There is nothing humble about it, but nothing seems to be humble about him anymore, including his life choices—and here I am, holding my breath, afraid to move, listening to his flustered exhale when I slam the box closed, a loud clap shut.

Without a word, I nudge him away from me, “Blair, listen—I was going to tell you…”

“When—? Before or after we had sex, Harry…Is that what this was?” I yell.

He panics and cups a hand over my mouth. It’s not hard, but it annoys the hell out of me, and I wrench his arm away, forcing him toward the window, “Don’t you fucking do that—you don’t get to do that—”

“I’m sorry—but seriously, Blair, let’s not wake your family,”

I let out a dry laugh, “Oh—trust me, they would understand—” I seeth.

“Oh, for fucks sake, Blair, that’s not fair—I don’t know what this was…I just really wanted to see you—” he says, raking a hand through his hair, a deep crease forming between his brows, and he licks his lips, running a hand down his face as he turns away.

“What do you want me to do? This is the way it’s supposed to work out. You know my family …I don’t really have a say. You know that—”

“Please—Harry—you’re almost 30 years old. You don’t think you have any say in your life?”

He turns around, a condescending laugh filling the space, “You of all people should understand…”

“Well—I thought I did…but I don’t think I do anymore. It just doesn’t make sense…none of this seems to make sense anymore. I don’t understand how we could be perfectly fine one day, and as soon as your dad put you on the path to be a partner at his firm—which we both knew would happen—” I start.

He shakes his head, pinching his lower lip between his thumb and index finger, contemplating my words, “Help me make it; make sense. When we knew all along what the path was going to be. Were did “WE” get lost because I did nothing but support you, and then you went away on that trip with your family—”

“And you’re on about this again…” he interrupts, words cutting like knives because this was the theme of some of our biggest arguments.

I’m shaking my head this time, confusion inching through my brain, straining to grasp for details I thought I packed away. “Now that’s not fair…” I force, my throat burning with the effort of biting back tears.

“Listen—this is my fault—” he says, reaching for the box, “I shouldn’t have come. I knew this would be a bad idea, but I just—”

I grasp onto the box, wanting to catch his eyes. I want to see the regret, “Tell me, does it hurt you, hurting me…I could have waited for your mom’s Facebook post…I know she’s over the moon with her…just fucking smitten that’s she’s everything and more—”

“I should go,” he says, his eyes darting to the window before he slides the box into his pocket. He opens the window, and the cold breeze flits into the dark room, reminding me of how little I have on. My eyes float to the bed, already mourning us like a fading memory—disappointment crawling up my spine, the sick twist of regret already tearing at my emotions as tears fill my eyes.

“Yeah, this was a bad idea…” I tell him, choking on the words, and I can feel my body starting to tremble. I want him gone, forever, to leave and be with his girlfriend, who will get him in the daylight. Who will kiss the mouth of the man I love for the rest of her life—and I’m sick—sick with the thought of them—and damn—This was easier when there was distance when I could pretend he didn’t exist.

“I’m sorry, bee—” He whispers, a slight trimmer in his voice as he reaches out to me, and let him because if this is all that is left. I want that last kiss. I want a kiss from the lips that were once mine, but when he pulls me in, I reach for his face, and he interjects, grasping my hands in his, denying me my one last wish.

“Harry…” I whisper, hot tears burning my eyes, “It’s just you and me right now…” I plead because he has that look of goodbye in his eyes; the reality setting in, like me standing here in his old tee-shirt, is too real for him—The cold draft of the air brings the world in with it. Yes, I feel it too, but his hands are so warm, his face is so sweet and kind, and I know what he’s about to do.

“Bee—” He tries, swallowing hard, like the words are stuck in his throat, tears drawing in his eyes, and he rubs his lips together, shaking his head as his eyes dart to our hands, and I grip his hands harder because he’s going to leave—he’s going to leave, and I’m never going to get his back; This man—the love of my life. There’s never a time he hasn’t had me, and he’s going to leave, he’s going to move on, and he will still have me because I could never let him go.

And when the tears spill over and fall down his cheeks, my body aches with a longing that’s so deep in my bone it hurts—my love for him hurts so fucking bad that I don’t think I’ll ever not love him or not want to be with him. He’s standing here breaking my heart all over again, and I still love him. I still want him always and forever like he fucking promised me because he did promise, and now she gets him; she gets to have my always and forever.

Now he’s pulling away, and I won’t let him go; I can’t let him go. “Bee…please…” he begs softly.

“I love you,” I cry out, “I love you so much, H—” and he pulls me into his body, letting me sob into his chest, my hot breath seeping into his body, and I breathe him in, trying to memorize our scent, but it there like muscle memory something I could never forget.

“You know I love you, Bee…” he breathes, pressing a warm kiss to the top of my head, “You know I will always love you, but you know that we can never do this again…”

His words slice through my pain, filling me with rage, and he’s right. We can’t do this ever again; he doesn’t get to have me like this and go back to her—and I’m so fucking mad at myself for falling into his trap because I’ve been so good. I can’t even remember the last time I talked to him. He knew what would happen when he knocked on my window, and I was so stupid to let him—yet here he is still wielding his power.

“You have to go,” I tell him, trying to force myself from his arms, and Harry’s grip tightens.

“I’m sorry, Bee—”

“No—this was wrong—this was all wrong, and you shouldn’t have done this…we shouldn’t have done this—”

I push him toward the window, angry adrenaline a trimmer in my fingertips when I bring a shaky hand up to tuck my hair behind my ear, “You did this to us…” I tell him.

“I’m—” he starts, and I know he’s just going to try and apologize, but that will never be enough, not when I know what happens next—and what? Did he use me? Did he feel sad and come looking for my sympathy?

“Leave—” I spit.

“Bee…come on—”

“Leave!” I say louder, loud enough to send an echo through the room. He stiffens, his panic reaching his face, and I cross my arms over my chest.

“Fine—” he hisses, his hair falling into his face as he bends his body halfway through the window. Harry doesn’t even look back; he doesn’t even give me a tiny morsel of hope, and I don’t know what I was expecting. Then Harry is out the window, and I slam it shut, swiping the curtains closed.

“Merry fucking Christmas, you Asshole…” I breathe, falling onto the bed to cry.

…

Here’s the thing about Christmas in my house: we wake up and celebrate, and nothing else is allowed. It’s the one time of the year when my mom is allowed to live in the delusion that everything is merry and bright. There’s no space to be sad. She’s up with the rising sun, her hair perfectly manicured, her make-up set for pictures, wrapped in a festive robe she just “rolled out of bed” in, and then she’s on to two more outfit changes.

So this morning, when I woke, ready to welcome her joyful cheer, I was surprised to see none. I found her standing at the sink, my dad leaning against the counter like I had just interrupted a fight, maybe some disagreement they didn’t want me part of. My first thought was that they knew. They saw Harry leaving, or maybe my voice had carried, and they heard me arguing with him.

It was like being a teenager all over again as I walked toward the coffee maker to pour myself a cup. Without fail, the clink of the dish against the stone countertop ricochets through the thick silence in the room, making me jumpy; the slurp of the pour is interrupted when my mom speaks. “All I’m going to say is let’s get through this day. I don’t want to talk about it. We can call all touch base once everyone is gone—Bee, will you stay longer this time or not?”

I’m in the midst of taking a sip, and the hot liquid hits my top lip, burning me as my eyes move from my dad to my mom in question, confused by whatever this is that I walked in on, “I wasn’t sure if I wanted to stay longer…I have a project—”

“Can you—?” she asks flatly like you better say “yes.”

I look to my dad, who raises his brows, eyes widening, and he blows out a breath, his lip puffing as he brings his coffee to his mouth, “Fine.” I answer because it doesn’t seem like there’s any other option.

And that was it—She switched up her mood as quickly as the conversation ended. I stood there sipping my coffee, mentally preparing, and that’s how we carried on, pushing it under the rug.

It started with presents, each gift given its proper praise, mom all smiles, dad snapping pictures, my sister nudging my shoulder as a constant reminder to keep up the show, and it was perfect—it was— but every time the camera flashed. I could feel myself drifting to the thought of all the pictures that would greet me when I opened my phone—How her red lips and long dark hair would steal my breath, her beauty outshining us all.

She became the jealous quake in my bones at the thought of Harry down on one knee, entrancing my thoughts, repeatedly threatening to pull me out of the moment—and now my mom is shouting from across the room, bidding for my attention, as I try and swallow the persistent lump burning a hole in my throat, making every word a battle of will to say the most straight-forward sentence—and it wasn’t fair; It wasn’t fair that I got to sit with it all day—a reel of memories cascading through my mind, always the slightest reminder to remind me of the past.

The smallest gestures, a deep-seeded pain strangling my insides; all my dad had to do was glance down at his watch. The watch Harry gave him when he turned forty or every time my mom tucked her behind her ear, I caught sight of the diamond earrings he got her and his mom, making them both laugh the last Christmas we all shared because that was our thing—it almost doesn’t seem real that our moms used to be best friends, nowadays it feels like a lifetime since they even shared one word, my mom growing bitter the day Harry broke my heart.

A sudden breakup can wreck anyone, and inherently, our families became the collateral damage, causing a complicated ripple through our families, a rigid divide that none of us knew how to address, let alone manage any semblance of a relationship; maybe that was our fault. I couldn’t be his friend. It hurt too much to try and mask my feelings, to manipulate them into something they weren’t, like right now—how I’m torturing myself, scrolling through social media, almost hoping I’ll see the pictures I know his mom will post. Perhaps it will be what I need; to rip the bandaid off, the right push I need to fucking move on because I don’t know how much longer I can live in the misery of what was and wasn’t.

Dissasoiating—the word of the day—a single word that could describe my whole day because somehow it’s dinner, and I’m sitting around the table trying to piece together the lapse in time I’ve lost. All it takes is one look at my mom to straighten up and be present. I don’t even know what they’re talking about, nor do I care, but when my cousin Jenny asks me to pass the potatoes, and the light captures the glint of her new engagement ring, my stomach drops, the hideous ache of jealousy climbing up my spine, and I’m sick again, my stomach turning at the thought, that maybe he’s already done it, maybe he’s asked her and she’s wearing his ring on her finger, and they’re sitting around the table; and every time she takes a bite it reflects the light from the chandler, everyone smiling because what a happy time, what a perfect day; what a bright fucking future they have.

This time, I can’t control it; it’s all too much, and I’m scraping the chair back, politely excusing myself, then bounding to the upstairs bathroom, yanking my phone from my pocket—and without a passing thought, I’m doing it—I’m calling Harry—by the first ring, I’m in panic mode, pacing back and forth, willing myself to end the call, trying to keep the phone from sliding down my sweaty palm.

I’m all adrenaline as I force the phone against my ear, the ring getting louder, and each time it rings, a gnarled knot of guilt builds in the depth of my belly. I keep looking to the toilet on the verge of falling to my knees and heaving anything that made its way to my stomach—then Harry forwards the fucking call to voicemail, and tears are spilling over my lids, my whole body hot, like maybe I’ll combust right here, explode with the fury of heat rising in my body.

I’m surprising myself when I press his name again, bringing the phone back to my ear, and I hold my breath, waiting for the first ring. It rings and then rings again, and by the third ring, I think I might get through—and it’s all a joke because yeah fucking right—By the fifth ring, I’m second-guessing myself again, shame eating away at my flesh, and then he’s forwarding the call again—my shame flying out the window.

Okay, yes, maybe this is the part where I tell you I should be embarrassed—but fuck it, I’m calling again, losing myself a little more each time he forwards my call. By the 8th call, I’m tormenting myself, a pitiful excuse of a human on the ground so caught up in my own grief that I don’t even hear my sister knocking on the door. The knock sounds, making my heart leap in my chest, the fear of being caught ripping through like an earth quack, and I’m up, catching sight of my reflection in the mirror, not even recognizing the person looking back at me.

I haven’t felt this desperate since we broke up, like an anxious tick buzzing under my skin. The humiliation of it all is a time bomb, counting down the seconds until it ignites inside me—and I’m there. I ignore the steady stream of knocks and crouch down like the monster I’ve become because I can’t look at myself and do what I know I’m about to do—it’s my one last stance, and I shoot Harry a text:

“Your a fucking coward!” I send and then realize I used the wrong fucking “your,” and my pride won’t let me go out like this. I send a quick “you’re” to fix my mistake and watch the screen, knowing he is now more aware of his than before. When the line changes from “delivered” to “read,” I watch the tiny dots collect in the corner of the screen, awaiting his reply—they appear and disappear several times until it finally stops altogether, and he leaves me on read.

Just as I’m about to send “fuck you!” my sister opens the door, pushing the bobby pin she used to pick the lock back into her hair, and closes the door behind her. “Dude, whatever is going on right now—you need to get it together—it’s one fucking day, okay…that’s all mom asks for, and she’s down there growing impatient. So seriously…if you’re up here freaking out about another dude you met on a dating app—like this isn’t the time—”

“I had sex with Harry—” I confess right then and there because I know this will be the only thing that will make her understand.

“No—” she says, pulling a handful of toilet paper from the roll, “We’re not doing this right now…” She wipes the tears from my face and forces me out of the bathroom and into my room.

“You have two minutes to get your shit together. I need Mom to be in a good mood today…listen, I have big shit going on too, but you don’t see me up here crying—” and she’s right. I saw her pregnancy test in our shared bathroom trash. She must have been panicked when she half-assed her wrapping job on her test. I know I taught her better than that, but this was what I needed to pull myself back up.

I came down the stairs with a smile. Everyone in the sitting room was having coffee and dessert; this was the last stretch. This is all we had left, and then I can check my phone that my sister made me leave upstairs—and so I would drone on keeping up with conversations, tossing out witty remakes, bringing laughter and joy to everyone around, and when my mom sent me a genuine smile, I felt myself smiling back, enjoying the company of my family; and when dad slipped me the “good” eggnog I realized that there’s nothing better at taking the edge off then alcohol.

Four eggnogs in on an empty stomach, and I was working the room, exaggerating about my life and all the projects I’ve taken on at work, dodging questions about my dating life, and when my grandma brought up Harry four times, dammit, I didn’t even flinch, I just kept the conversation moving, filter out the emotions coursing through me like a breeze on a sunny day, right before a summer storm sets in. I even kept it cute and classy when cousin Jen took her engagement ring on a tour around the room, gutting me like a fish when she said, “I never thought I would get married before you…you know…like you and Harry were like “it” you know—” and I’m smiling again, getting a nod of approval from mom when she hears me congratulate Jen again, admiring her beautiful ring.

By eggnog five, I’m switching to “what he’s having,” I shout to my dad as I watched him pour, maybe whisky over the rocks, a shallow pour, but it packed a punch. I knew it was time to dial it back when I found myself leaning over Jenny, who was flipping between her social platforms, landing on Facebook, where I know for a fact Harry’s mom would be posting, taking care to tag everyone in each photo—which brings me back to the time when dear ole’ cousin Jenny started following Harry. It was Christmas break, we had just turned fifteen, and I could tell she had a crush on him. She spent all Christmas break following us around, cornering him anytime she could get him alone; I had to share my bed with her that Christmas, and I remember how miserable I was without the gift of Harry crawling through my window on Christmas Eve.

It’s wild to think of how feeble my grasp on time was when we were young, how a couple of weeks could feel like an eternity; it’s been less than a day since I saw him last. How am I supposed to go a lifetime of never hearing his voice again, to look into those green eyes that have seen me through so many changes, not to feel those hands that have cradled me like a child, held me like a lover, squeezing and pulling me into shapes that fit him; arms that carried and lifted me to heights that I could never have reached on my own—and maybe I speaking figuratively because no one has carried me at my worst or lifted me at my best until I was the best version of myself, but isn’t funny how the people that bring out our best know exactly how to rally the worst parts of us.

Mom taps her dessert spoon to her glass, grabbing everyone’s attention. It’s time for her big send-off speech. My eyes dart to my sister leaning against the fireplace, rolling her eyes, “I just want to start by saying I’m so thrilled that you’ve all chosen to spend this joyous holiday with us…you all know this is my absolute favorite holiday and every year I look forward to spending it with each and every one of you—” she tells us raising her glass, and everyone knows what’s coming next and as she starts her final lines— the same lines she uses every year—my sister sends me a wink mouthing the lines in unison with our mother.

“There’s no time like Christmas to let you know how appreciated you are. I feel honored to call you family…” and her hook, line, and sinker is, “May the light of Christmas warm your hearts this holiday season and remember love is the true spirit of Christmas—”

My throat burns as she finishes, “And always know how much I love you and always will…so before I start getting too emotional, I better cut myself off—” she laughs, wiping a tear from her eye, and as much as I hate how crazy she gets about Christmas, she really is amazing at being so selfless; to give everyone such a beautiful day, and I’m so grateful for her and my family, and then the doorbell rings taken everyone by surprise. We all freeze, eyes moving around the room because we’re all here, and no one is expecting anyone.

“Fred—” my mom calls to my dad. “Are we expecting anyone else?”

My dad’s reaction is slow, but he launches himself from the chair and excuses himself. When he comes back, he looks bewildered, half-tipsy as he shrugs his shoulder to tell us no one was there—and that was that. No one blinked an eye—yet my first thought was Harry, and I felt myself slipping because the whole day had passed; certainly, theirs was over by now, and the thought had me breaking my own heart, picturing her in his old bed, the whole family tucked away in their rooms, still riding out the high of such a magically joyful day.

And she’ll kiss his lip and say, “I love you.” He’ll lay her down in the bed I gave myself to him in, and he’ll make love to her like he loved me last night, and there is no end; there’s no end to the torture of it all because how can one person fuse themselves to every fiber of my being—and more importantly how could I still allow it?

As the last guest passed our threshold, Mom, being the gracious host she was, sent them off with candies and cookies, and I stood there wishing I was more like her, like my sister, who could always pretend, who knew how to wear “the smile” like a badge of honor. I wondered why this all had to be so hard. Why is love all or nothing? Why can’t we flip a switch and “poof,” it’s gone?

I watched my mom close the door, my siblings dispersing, and my dad already making his way back to his chair, but my mom just stood there. She let out a heavy sigh, her once perfect posture decompressing as she held on to the doorknob, “Oh Bee—” she said, eventually turning around to face me, and suddenly it looked like the weight of the day had finally caught up to her beautiful features, now tired—a mournful pinch between her brows, pursuing her lip while her eyes roamed my face. I’m trying my hardest to keep it together because there is something about that look a mom can give, that “I can fix everything with a hug” look.

“Do you need anything…I didn’t sleep very well last night. I was thinking of calling it early. if that’s okay?” I ask

“Oh honey, don’t worry about it…it’s been a long day for everyone,” she states, unbuttoning the first two buttons of her silk blouse, that mourful look still lacing her features.

“Let’s just deal with the clean up tomorrow…sound good, baby?” she tells me, slinging an arm around my shoulder, “I know today was hard for you…Thank you for being such a good sport. I’m so proud of the way you handled yourself. You did a beautiful job, sweetie.” Her words catch me off guard, and I turn to face her, my throat burning at the thought that she knows everything.

I swallow hard, opening my mouth to let out the words building up, but I can only manage a small whimper. “Listen, honey,” Mom starts, and I’m already a puddle in her arms, wanting my mommy to make it all better.

“I’m not going to lie and say it gets better, but one day, it’s not going to hurt as bad as it hurts right now, and eventually, when you find someone new—”

I gasped out a sob then, her words hitting every sore spot on my body, “Shhh—Shh—I know baby, I know—but listen,” She said, cradling my face in her hands, “I know that this isn’t what you want to hear—”

“But one day you will find someone new, and they’ll be just enough to get you over that last slump of pain, and maybe if you’re lucky enough…which I know you are…Harry will become a pleasant memory of the past, baby, because both of you were so lucky to have what you had. Not everyone will get to say they had a love like the two of you shared, and that is so so special, honey, so special—”

The tears are rolling down my cheeks faster than my mom can swipe them away, and it’s taking every ounce of strength I have to keep myself upright, “I love him so much—” I push past the sob, shuttering through me.

“I know, honey, I know—one of the hardest lessons we can learn is to let the people we love go, let them go so they can be free, and if it’s meant to be, they’ll come back—”

“I can’t, Mom, I can’t do it,” I cry, trying to bury my face into her shoulder, but she has a firm grip on it. Blair Marie, you are so strong, honey, and we are all here for you. You can do this, okay?” she says, nodding her head up and down.

“Okay?” She asks again, and I nod in agreement, “Listen—between you and me, we’re going to have our hands full anyway, right? Don’t think I don’t know about your sister—she’s next.”

I’m stunned into silence. “Yeah, I know. That’s how I felt at first. Honey, I love you. I am here for you. Now go get some rest…” she says, pushing me toward the stairs.

“Oh—and hopefully, we aren’t expecting any unexpected guests this evening….”

I shake my head, “I—”

“Yeah, slamming your window at the crack of dawn is a dead give away—”

Somehow, she manages to get a smile out of me, and I roll my eyes, ready to make my way up the stairs, “Hey, Mom, thank you for making today so beautiful…it really was beautiful.” I tell her.

“Oh—! And Mom, thank you for those kind words. I love you.” she smiles, placing a hand over her heart, and we share a look of knowing—and without a doubt, that woman managed to lift my spirits—again. She’s too good at that; she is father fucking Christmas.

And while my heart still felt heavy, I felt like I could get through this night. I would march into my room, head straight for my phone, and turn it off; there would be no doomsday scrolling. I would take a shower, hell maybe even take a hot bath to rid myself of this day—Maybe I would even start packing away everything in my childhood room that reminded me of him, set myself up for the next year, and seriously, it was amazing how quickly the motivation surged up my chest; almost bursting at the seams with the very thought of it.

So by the time I turned my knob, I was ready, so fucking ready—But as the door clicked open, a cold chill grazed over my wrist. All I saw was my curtains billowing back and forth with the breeze flowing in and out of my window, and I rushed over to shut the damn window because I didn’t remember opening it, but maybe my sister opened it while I was fixing my make up earlier and that’s when I hear it:

“Bee—”

I slam the window shut, panic rushing through me, every limb of my body shaking with it as I turn toward the sound. And there he is, the love of my life, sitting on the edge of my bed, hunched over with his face buried in his hands, and when he looks up. I can tell he’s been crying, and he pulls a small box from his pocket and places it on the nightstand, right next to the very same box that held his future, and all he says is, “I couldn’t do it—”

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