#but as people the women are still written really really well
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I'm really not assuming Harry's identity was fully formed as a toddler. That's simply not supported by science. Harry and Lily do have different life experiences and their personalities are shaped by the people around them and the different difficulties they experience.
I simply noted that in your interpretation, Harry and Lily are completely different because they didn't grow up the same way, and am offering an alternative interpretation to your assertions that 1) Lily had little to no troubles experienced in her childhood, and that 2) Harry's upbringing and misadventures erased any identity he had outside of his abuse or the identity assigned to him by others, by leaning on the way JKR's writing shows us the similarities between Harry and Lily that exist despite the fact that Harry was not raised by her, Harry does not remember her, and in the real world he would have been more likely to adopt the Dursleys' more poisonous traits and beliefs and not share any similarities to his parents at all.
I can agree that something like writing your letters the same way or having a more sarcastic personality is a mild or surface-level trait, but I can't agree with that take for the larger choices Harry and Lily make. Even taking dying out of the equation doesn't remove uncanny similarities. Lily chooses to befriend (and, for quite some time, stay friends with) someone like Severus Snape when class consciousness and peer pressure should have shaken that out of her at age 11--unless it was a core component of her personality. And however much they grow into better versions of themselves later, the same choice can be seen in Harry's choice to befriend Ron and Hermione. Neville and Luna are both more visibly unpopular to the average reader, but first-year Ron is yet another son from a well-known but poor wizarding family with very little social capital, and Hermione is a by-the-books girl with very limited social skills, in the same position as Harry but for the fact that she has no wizarding ancestry or gratitude-inspiring fame to lean on to bolster her more unlikable qualities. Still, Harry bonds with them both anyway. And even these friendships have significant friction that nearly ends them, or does in Lily's case.
Symbolism is so important in the series that I don't think it's incorrect to acknowledge how it turns up in characterization of Lily and Harry. The ways in which they react to things, and the choices they make re: larger concepts like friendship and forgiveness and sacrifice are startlingly similar when you consider their lack of direct contact in the natural world.
(Smaller point, but even though there's no evidence of this in the real world, in the HP world souls do exist and their natures (or at least Harry's and Voldemort's) are extensively discussed in the latter books. So even though it's arguable in the real world whether our personalities are inherent down to our souls, it's not so easy to argue against this in HP, where Dumbledore argues in Deathly Hallows that Harry and Voldemort's souls are incompatible and cannot share space, and doubles down on the assertion when Severus tries to ground the discussion back in minds and Occlumency/Legilimency.)
The fact is, these large and small traits do tell us who Lily and Harry are and they do matter. These snippets of personality are the only way we have of interpreting Lily since she predeceases the entire story, and the only way we have of interpreting Harry outside of his words and perspective.
harry potter is NOT james potter.
I love parallels. I love people reminding others of those they've lost along the way.
But Harry Potter is not James . And that is so vital to his entire character.
When people see Harry, they see James. They see a James who sees the world through Lily's eyes. When they see Harry, they don't see Harry.
And that is so vital to his entire being. It's vital to how people see Harry. The people that didn't know James, see the Boy-Who-Lived.
The people who did, who were close to Harry, to James, to Lily. They see James and Lily Potter. They see the people who died, people they were close to, people they miss every day but will never see again.
Remus, Sirius, Snape, McGonagall.
At first, they see James and Lily. And then when they meet him - apart from Snape- they quickly realise he is anything but.
Harry is not arrogant, rich, spoilt. He doesn't have an ego, he doesn't play pranks, he isn't a chaser, he doesn't pick fights.
Harry isn't exceptionally bright at everything he does, he isn't inconceivably forgiving for those who don't deserve it.
He is not Lily and James.
When peole write Harry as a golden retriever, as effortlessly good at everything, they aren't writing about Harry.
Harry who grew up not wanted. Harry who grew up believing something was wrong with him. Harry who was forced into the wizarding world with no knowledge. Harry who is as stubborn as a mule,. Harry who is loyal to a fault, who forgives those he loves, Harry who isn't his parents.
He has traits of them, their anger, their ability to love, and much much more.
BUT Harry Potter isn't them. He isn't the 'best of them both' he isn't James or Lily or Sirius or Regulus.
Harry Potter is Harry. Just Harry.
And that is why he doesn't get along ith Snape. That's why McGonagall believes Harry dragged Neville out for a joke in first year.
When people see Harry, they don't see Harry. And by writing Harry as somebody else, or as 'so-and-so's child' you're not doing the character justice.
'I want a complex character with complex relationships'
'i want an angry character'
'i want to read a book that makes me think'
you couldn't even handle Harry Potter.
#Harry Potter#Lily Evans#harry and lily#not fireandgold#these traits are just general but they are reflective of Harry and Lily's similar choices across the series#it's my opinion that That Woman (JKR) deliberately waited until the end to give Lily a sliver of characterization to really drive home#her similarity to her son and that Harry sees that too in DH. However waiting until the 11th hour to characterize the mother of the MC#is a poor narrative choice and will not always be received well even if the main idea (sacrificial love and resurrection and redemption)#is pulled off. And imho that's what happened here. It's just one of those things that is worse with rereads and time passing esp when#women are pushing for more progressive representation of female characters whether they are leads or supporting or side ladies.#this goes back to my assertion that Harry should not be written as a carbon copy of Lily or James but he does have some of their traits#just like people in the same family who may have never met may still have similar traits or make similar choices. genetics isn't ironclad#but it can play a part here. but That Woman didn't think that far and neither should we lol. it's all about Meaningful Narrative Choices#and for her it was a meaningful choice to have Harry and Lily both be cheeky kids who write their Gs the same and choose to die for others.#yikes on bikes this is a lot of tags
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we were drunk, it happens part 1 - part 2
pairing: lando norris x verstappen!reader warnings: none? words: 2200
summary: lando and Y/N meet at a dinner with other drivers. they were drunk and landed in bed but what when her brother max finds out
there will probably be a part 2 bc i have many ideas!
this is my first f1 x reader fanfic i have ever written so please be kind
Y/N has never really liked Formula 1 which surprised everyone she told that as she was no one other than Max Verstappenâs little sister. She of course knew the basics and has watched some of the Grands Prix, but she has never enjoyed being there.
But one Friday evening that changed. Her brother had told her that he had been invited to a dinner with some other drivers, and they were allowed to bring a +1 and because Kelly wasnât in Monaco that week, he asked Y/N to come with him.
At first, she was reluctant but eventually she agreed. But now she was standing in front of her mirror and wasnât sure what to wear. What clothes do people wear when they are at a dinner with literal multimillionaires? An hour (and a long call with Kelly) later she was dressed in a simple black dress with a split on the right side, her curled hair falling over her shoulders perfectly.
She felt a bit weird as she stepped down the stairs to her kitchen where she drank a glass of water while waiting for her brother to pick her up, as she had a feeling that she would be absolutely underdressed at the dinner.
Only a few minutes later she heard the doorbell and opened the door to find Max standing in front of her in dark blue jeans and a white button-up shirt.
âHey, are you ready?â, he asked as he pulled her in a quick hug.
âNo. Not really but letâs go. How many people are gonna be at the dinner?â Y/N was a bit worried as she hated to be around too many people â rich and arrogant people in particular as she had experienced that enough when she was still a kid, and her dad had always invited other rich people to their home.
âI only know that Charles will be there, and he will probably bring his girlfriend, Alex. I am sure youâll like her. Also, Lando is probably going to be there as well as Carlos and his girlfriend Rebecca. George is also going to be there and that means his girlfriend will be there as well, Carmen. And probably the other drivers will be there as well, but I am not sure because George has planned it all.â Max paused to look at his little sister. âIf you feel uncomfortable at any point we can just go. But I am sure you will get along just fine with everyone.â
Y/N just nodded as she sat down in the passenger seat of Maxâ car. An Audi RS Q3 he always said was perfect for everyday tasks but Y/N knew he mostly had that car so he could easily drive around with his whole family. Kelly, Penelope and their future baby. Even though nobody knew about the pregnancy yet, not even their parents as Max and Kelly wanted to keep that to themselves for as long as possible.
Only a few minutes later they arrived at a nice and expensive looking restaurant where they stopped in the parking lot.
They stepped in the building where they were greeted by a waitress almost immediately. He brought them to a separated room where some people were already sitting around a big table.
âHi guys. This is Y/N, my sister. She was kind enough to join me today. Y/N, you already know Charles, Carlos, Lando and Oscar? And there is the back we have Lewis, Checo, Yuki, Pierre, Fernando and Francoâ, Max introduced her while his sister tried to continue smiling even though she just wants to be at home and watch on of her favorite tv shows.
âYes, I do. It is really nice to meet yâall. Where can I sit?â, she asked as she didnât want to be standing there being stared at by everyone.
A young woman pointed to the chair right next to hers and opposite three other women, who looked just as good. âYou can sit here. I am Lily by the way. Oscarâs girlfriend. And thatâs Alex, Charlesâ girlfriend and Rebecca. She is Carlosâ girlfriend. And there we have Carmen who is here with George. So, you are Maxâ sister?â
Y/N was a bit taken aback by the kindness of Lily. She didnât think that anyone of the WAGs would be like that. She thought they would be more arrogant. More⌠reserved. Like she used to know them. But Lily and also the others seemed different.
âUhm⌠Yeah, I am. He brought me here because Kellyâs abroad.â Y/N took a sip of the glass of water that was placed in front of her by one of the waitresses.
âOh, thatâs sad I was looking forward to finally meeting her, but it is nice that you are here! Max talks about you a lot. It feels like he loves you more than he loves Kellyâ, Alex said laughing.
âThatâs because he does,â Y/N said and was scared that the others wouldnât get her little joke when they didnât react but sighed relived when they started laughing.
They continued chatting a bit, but Y/N just had eyes for one person in the room. Lando. She had seen him before. Of course. But now that she saw him up closer, she couldnât help but admire his looks. His curls were a nice brown color and couldnât curl more. His eyes were a pretty blue that looked even better with him wearing this blue hoodie right now.
When Lando looked in her direction, she immediately looked away and grabbed her wine glass. No feelings for arrogant multimillionaires. She didnât want, nor did she need that in her life.
 ***
The next morning Y/N woke up with the worst headache existing.
She opened her eyes and regretted it right away when the bright sunlight blended her.
She definitely made a big mistake drinking so much alcohol the day before.
It wasnât until then that she noticed something warm next to her. A body. Not anyoneâs body, she realized when she looked to the right. Lando.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. This canât be real.
But no. This wasnât a dream, she quickly noticed when she wanted to get up and couldnât find her clothes from the day before.
She got up and went to her closet in the exact moment she heard the doorbell ring. Now she remembered why she even woke up in the first place.
Y/N took a hoodie and sweatpants which she put on quickly before going downstairs to open the door.
âHey! Wow, you look even worse than yesterday when you leftâ, Max said, only a second after Y/N had opened the door.
âThanksâ, she groaned. âWhat are you even doing here so early?â
âIt is 1 pm. And I wanted to give you your purse. You forgot it in the car yesterday. Now, are you gonna offer your big brother a coffee as a thank you?â, Max asked and before Y/N could stop him he pushed her to the side and went straight to her kitchen.
âThatâs not a good idea. I wanted to take a shower and then I have an appointment at- â, she couldnât even finish the sentence when she heard her bedroom door open and heard footsteps on the stairs.
Only seconds later, Lando stepped in the kitchen, his hair tousled and only wearing his boxer briefs.
âHey, Y/N do you- â, he immediately stopped when he spotted Max leaning on the counter. âOh fuck.â
He immediately turned around and ran upstairs, figuring out that the following conversation shouldnât happen with him just in his underwear. Â
âLando! You fucking bastard. You slept with my sister?!â Max pushed himself off the counter to run after the Brit while Y/N just stood there, unable to react. And honestly, she didnât even want to react. If she had the choice she would just go outside and hide somewhere to not be involved in the situation, but she knew that wouldnât really work longer than a couple hours, so she could also just get it over with now.
âMax! Stop! Let Lando at least get dressed so he doesnât have to talk to you about all that in just his underwear.â
âHe fucking slept with you! I donât care if he is wearing anything! Lando let me in you canât lock yourself in the bedroom forever!â
Knowing she canât convince Max to go downstairs she made her way upstairs.
âMax. Go downstairs and calm down. We were drunk. I also made the decision yesterday to sleep with him. So go downstairs, while Lando gets dressed, make a cup of coffee and wait.â Y/N glared at her brother, and it finally seemed to convince him.
âFine. But you will both come to me immediately after he got dressed.â Reluctantly, the Dutch made his way to do what Y/N told him to do.
When Max was gone Y/N knocked at the wooden door.
âLando. Itâs me. Let me in.â Only a moment later, the Brit opened the door and peeked outside.
âIs he gone?â, he practically whispered.
Y/N couldnât help but laugh at how scared he looked. âYes, he is. Now let me in because we have to talk about what we say to make sure Max doesnât insult you even more.â
âHow about we donât say anything and just hide in here? I am scared of him, Y/N. I canât go out there again. He will kill me because I slept with you! His little sister!â
âLando. You know we canât do that. We will go out there and tell him that we were drunk, and it wonât happen again. It was a one-time thing, and thatâs- â, Y/N wanted to say more but was interrupted by Lando.
âWhat if it wasnât.â The woman just stared at Lando for a couple seconds, suddenly frozen in place.
âSorry?â
âWhat if- what if I want to do it again? Listen. We had fun together, didnât we? So why donât we continue with it? No feelings, of course. Max would kill us. Just fun.â
Y/N took her time to proceed what Lando had just said. They did, in fact, have fun. But it didnât change the fact that it was stupid. But she couldnât help it. She did like last night. It was one of the best nights of her life.
Lando had known exactly what to do. He touched her in all the right places, he was demanding yet gentle. Rough but soft. It was everything. It was almost intoxicating how he touched her â made her feel seen. Something she hadnât felt in a long time.
âYes. Yes, youâre right. But then, what do we tell my brother?â
âEither the truth or we lie and say it wonât happen again. He doesnât necessarily have to find out, does he? I am for the second option. Less of a risk to be killed, you know? But I think we should just see where the conversation takes us.â
Y/N couldnât help but laugh again.
âOkâ, she nodded. âThen letâs do that.â
Together they went downstairs. Maxâ face was as red as a tomato since he was still mad at Lando. If he was being honest with himself, he knew that Lando wasnât the only guilty one. His sister also decided to sleep with Lando, but it was easier to be mad at a colleague â even â than his little, innocent (or so he had thought) sister.
âSo. Anyone here who wants to explain what happened yesterday?â, Max asked with an annoyed, maybe even hurt, look on his face.
âMax. I promise nothing bad has happened. Lando and I, we were drunk. It happens. I am 22 years old. I am pretty sure you know that what happened yesterday, has happened before. Just with other people. So, please. Donât be mad at Lando for what happened. It was my decision as much as it was his.â
Y/N felt Lando standing next to her. He looked at Max calmly, trying to deescalate a potential argument, by just not saying anything. The Brit knew it was the smartest thing he could do in the moment.
âI know that it is normal what happened. But, Y/N, you also have to understand my point of view. He is a colleague. A rival of mine. And to be honest, he is not known for being the guy for long term relationships. I simply donât want you to get hurt. And definitely not that you will have a broken heart because of him.â Max looked seriously concerned, protective.
âI wonât, Max. I promise. And even if he did break my heart, I would tell you right away so you can kill him on your own as soon as possible.â
The blonde man laughs while nodding. He stepped forward and wrapped Y/N up in his arms.
âOk. I just want you to be happy. Do whatever you want just donât tell me about itâ, he mumbles in his sisterâs hair before releasing her from his hug and turning around.
âI will go now. See you. Bye!â
Lando and Y/N flopped on the couch after saying their goodbyes and just a single minute later, Landoâs phone made a sound that signaled an incoming message.
If you hurt her, you are dead, just so you know. â Max
#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 x female reader#f1 fanfic#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1#f1#formula one#lando norris x reader#lando norris#lando x reader#lando norris x y/n#ln4 x reader#ln4 x y/n
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for all its faults, One Piece never has women inexplicably hate each other for?? no reason?
oda's strong women don't stand around saying how they aren't like other girls then tear each other down - they are always so supportive of each other! its why we can joke that nami is a huge lesbian with the most game of the crew. she always bonds with other women so deeply so quickly without a hint of two faced-ness. its always so genuine and so so sweet.
kaya, vivi, robin, camie, wanda, kiku, even lola-the-homicidal-zombie-warthog who thought nami was stealing her love interest. lola ended up helping nami above all. nami fought a guy she was terrified of for lola! no hesitation!!
#its lame when nami and robin get sidelined in fights and the way oda draws womens figures is god awful#but as people the women are still written really really well#kiku was more zoro and choppers friend than hers but nami still no hesitation was like hell yea new friend#this is a series about LOVE man god its so good#one piece#meta#says ser
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Stampede aka another episode of luffy turning haters into dick riders just with his kind and big heart
#i might understand all the robin law fanfare... its been 26 minutes of stampede......#frobin reigns supreme imo still.....#VICEADMIRAL MOMONGA TOCAME LA PORONGA??? HELLO#THE LOG POSE TO LAUGH TALE???? and hancock arrived â¤ď¸â¤ď¸#usopp saving luffh omg.....#blonde buggy..... why are we doing this to out beautiful women...#fujitora is on his own frequency... here you go a meteorite.. whatever happens to all of you and our troops happens goodbye#mihawk intervened bc zoro couldn't do it omg.... nami keep watch he is going to end it all tonight jesus#also persona following mihaw for a second movie ajdjaks.... i love them together honestly#brosalino is the kuma guy's uncle????? nepotism......#calling this guy the heir of the demon.... taking blame off ace akdjsksn.... you know whats funny in movies garp is very like thoughtful and#comprehensive of others peoples issues and then you get to how he raised luffy and like.... wouldn't that have been good there....#and with ace too lmao.... i mean he didnt have abandonment issues but just wait and see to a 10yo asking if he is worthy of living idk...#i get the meaning of it and what he meant but we all know ace didnt get that at the time until luffy got there#usopp.... see how when oda writes the movies it feels different.... first steong world with namo and now stampede with usopp...#the relationship moments really hit.. i was gonna comment about zoro and the cursed sword but that was just focusing on him#well this one wasnt written by oda but supervised i will take it....#hina taking the kids aldjakskal...... smoker and hina best straight ship behind frobin imo..... baby 5 x sai number 3 spot#sabo....... actually thank you bc smoker thinks he can take anybody#hancock and buggy AJSJAKAKLQQ omg usopp dont cry....... luffy will KILL that guy for making usopp feel like that lmao YEAAAH!!!!!#law smoker sabo the luffy lover squad..... each in their own way lmao#hancock its been so long how are you <3 omg law what are you doing here <3 my brother sabo hello.#crocodile made the plan of course.... luffy lover member too#usopps bullets omg....#sanji and zoro against lucci omg..... YEAAAHHHH#wait a second straw hat crew costume by uniqlo design team??? THE DRIP!!!#luffy seeing ace beside luffy with the fire goodbye.... he is EVERYWHERE#talking tag#watching one piece#watching one piece movies
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when a regretevator headcanon pisses you off so much that you become a feminist
#i wish this was a joke i really do#but like. transmasc bive really made me think about why i was so happy to have a character like bive#and why it is so rare to find interesting/funny female characters in media#and how even when a female character isnt just pathetic and weak shes always still responsible or at least aesthetically pleasing#in a way that male characters dont tend to be a lot of the time#and that just got me thinking more about how women tend to act in mainstream media (indie projects often arent prone to this)#and why i worry about getting bullied for things like not caring about my clothes and not wearing makeup and allat#in a way that the boys in my school just. dont need to care about#and how nearly every girl i know cares about their appearance in some respect and none of the boys i know do#transmasc bive feels like someone saying âa well written female character who doesnt adhere to the expectations of society? nah thats a man#CANT I JUST NOT ADHERE TO THE EXPECTATIONS OF SOCIETY AND ALSO USE SHE/HER IN PEACE???? GOD#and im not saying that transmasc people go through less than women do because thats not true#nor am i saying that transmasc people dont deserve rep!!! i think trans rep is a great thing when youre not slapping it on a character that#is breaking gender stereotypes by being a woman#i just think. what a coincidence that people headcanon bive as transmasc more than any other female character in regretevator.#and why do they headcanon the canon she/her character as transmasc instead of transfemme. IM IN FAVOUR OF TRANSFEMME BIVE!!!#i cant speak on behalf of the trans community in general but like!! transfemme people deserve recognition too!!!#make prototype transmasc! make infected transmasc! make MR transmasc for all i care!#heck make mozelle transmasc if you want! we stan gender non comformity here!#but bive? BACK THE FUCK OFF#please dont take away my well written gender non conforming female character away from me#shocker! not all girls who dont care about their appearance or being feminine turn out to be transmasc! some are Just Like That!#i got carried away there#i typed all this out on christmas day but im gonna post it later because. rambling about feminism and bive isnt very uh. christmasy
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Yesterday I saw this tweet quoting a list of the âao3 ship stats of 2023â and they were talking about how out of 100 ships, the list only had 27 women total. Then someone said that couldnât simply be just misogyny, and another person said they had seen others explaining they mostly ship male characters because women are badly written/under developed, and I mean⌠Please, thatâs such bullshit! It made me sad, and also it made me think of these characters weâve been loving for so long and despite them being written by men, and sometimes being BADLY written or written ooc, theyâre still so important and itâs so worth exploring their layers and giving them voice. I just wish female fic writers would step up and write about ourselves, write characters we can relate, flesh them outâweâre in 2024, ffs! How can we blame men for not writing women well and then just dedicate our time and creativity to write this so called interesting fictional men we have love or whatever? Sorry, I know this sounds more angsty than anything but it really pissed me off. We need to stop calling male blorbos âbaby girlâ and start writing and voicing real baby girls!!! (That obviously includes wlw relationships!) Thatâs why I love this blog so much, btw. Thatâs why when I thought of venting about it I thought: oh, she would understand! Thank you for always talking about Marissaâs layers and potential, thanks for making women who relate to her in some level feel understood. đŤśđť
Oh wow, that's crazy. But also... unsurprising. So that's 27 total women out of 200 characters/individuals? Jesus. I'm not terribly versed in modern fandom (or even, like, old fandom, really) but male characters have historically been babied and loved on more. I don't really get it. A huge chunk of that is they were created and crafted by men and those stories come from a patriarchal perspective. How shows/stories shape and shift can really define how things are written moving forward and it's frankly true that audiences are much more harsh about the fallibility of female characters than they are of their male counterparts. I personally think it stems from men being generally terrible irl so people take male characters and run with them because it's safe and comforting rather than dealing with the reality of dudes irl.
You're right, we need to stand up for the ladies!! And that absolutely includes wlw relationships!
You're very sweet. I love Marissa. I could talk about her all day. It blows my mind that people still misunderstand her in 2024.
#ask#anonymous#i detest when my fave character on an ensemble ends up being a guy. like goddamn i had one job#it happens very seldom but like.... yeah. dawson's creek in particular#i do think part of it is women are historically written terribly like you said#but to me that's all the more motivation to write stuff for them to rectify things#not lean into male arcs instead or whatever#imagine me caring much for manpain...... just wouldn't happen#unless it's pacey witter crying#but like i said that's rare#dc hated their women tho so it's not my fault. well joey becomes a mary sue but other than that. that's a form of hatred sort of#while the oc really just hated marissa. to the nth degree#and kirsten lowkey but that's another story#i just realized this ask is literally âshe's everything... he's just kenâ#and people losing their minds over ken#i think it's more the power of ryan gosling than anything but still
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as a russian who doesn't talk to russian people online what the shit is happening there hello
look man i myself have put in the effort to Not talk to online russians for like (checks hand) 7 or so years (of course iâve met some really great ones but this isnât about them and they probably know it) but iâm sure the community didnât change much. actually from the glimpses i see it seems to have gotten worse. donât even get me startedddddd man
#Like okay first we have the misogynist dudebros. not a category exclusive to online russians but#there are so many itâs fucking crazy. homophobic to hell and back and Will hate on you for no reason#alpha male type mfs who hate women but will still harass them because of course they will#the second category of course is weird unironic fujoshis who are also usually proshippers#and they are either 12 (forgivable) or 25 and the thing is you can NEVER tell. But itâs kind of fucked how#acceptable it is to just straight up fetishize gay men (hell probably not only them) in online russian communities#and listen to me. the secret third category is that there is no third category. Both of these categories are racist#deer was right i have never seen a community more racist or xenophobic than fucking online russians#you draw a character one shade darker than their usual skintone and suddenly you got annoying as fuck russians in your comments going#BRO BURNT IN THE SUNNN đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł ENGLISH FANDOM LOOK WHAT YOUâVE DONE !!! <- in recent times they have taken to blaming the english fandom for#âwokefyingâ their sacred online russian spaces. Of course we can only be woke enough to fetishize gay men. god forbid black people exist#now the actual third category is the online russian tĐľrf/radfĐľm community. it seems recent to me but also as i said i have not really#interacted with russian comminity as a whole for a long while. But yea anyways theyâre crazy i dont think i have to explain this one#but theyâre somehow more evil and miserable than the ones youâre used to#another recent one is the russian twitterians ⌠iâve only seen glimpses of them as well as i dont use twitter#but you will not believe the shit these mfs try to pull. They try to get you to stop swearing at all bc they find a way to make every#russian swear word offensive. AND they speak fucking ⌠englussian. rusglish. Half of their sentences are just english words written in#russian letters. all the same buzzwords english speaking twitter users like to say!#if youâve never seen a russian talk about feminization or gatekeeping or being woke or yadda yadda. Well i have#itâs bad. theyâre just very very terminally online#and donât worry the last two categories will also always be racist/xenophobic even if the last one tries to seem Progressive#donât know if i missed anytning but those are just the Specific Types of annoying asf online russians that i have noticed and have been#observing from a safe distance like a scientist#my point is keep not talking to russian people#cramswering#edit: I FORGOT BUT DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HOW ONLINE RUSSIANS TREAT TRANS PEOPLE#YOU CANNOT IMAGINE THE WAY THEY REACT TO TRANS HEADCANONS ITâS LIKE THE END OF THE WORLD TO THEM. OR TRANS CHARACTERS#OR GOD FORBID ACTUAL REAL LIFE TRANS PEOPLE. itâs actually quite incredible how bigoted online russians are
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what some of the undertale fandom did with grillby fucking fascinates me like my god
#random thoughts#he has 2 (two) count em TWO lines#and a bunch of people were just like 'yeah lets just shove him and sans together thats fine'#which like? it's cute and he has a cool (ha!) character design but WHAT#but i do feel like it's a case of fans taking a male side character and a male main character and shoving them together#instead of engaging with a ship involving a woman#or however you phrase that idk#just like. toriel was RIGHT THERE.#what the fuck was that other ship. grillster? that was even funnier#gaster doesn't even have any canon dialogue IN GAME#they really took the two skinniest (?) men in the game and slammed em together like barbie dolls#there are so many well written women in undertale god. just any woman.#and so many canon relationships that are so engaging like jesus#alphys and undyne. bratty and catty. those two gay guards.#hell if you want two characters who don't engage with each other and are basically blank slates do burgerpants and nice cream guy#WHAT IS SO INTERESTING ABOUT THE FIRE MAN#is it the suit#ALSO WTF WAS UP WITH FUCKED UP SANSBY WEEK#i still have that tag blocked yall were being mean to sans for no reason#grillby is such a fucking nonentity he doesn't even have his own fandom wikipage#he is lumped in with the drunk bunny who. guess what. canonically flirts with sans and has more than two lines#match made in heaven i tells ya#listen im not gonna act like i dont also think grillby is hot#oh wait hold the fuck on someone's on the roof of the apartments across from me#what the fuck#i live on the second floor how tf did they get up therr
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thinking about that one post about "he's a girl to me" or whatever. and that has me thinking about heavensward so much. and also stormblood! kinda just ffxiv in general but I feel the later expansions have this issue less but ESPECIALLY like. estinien, aymeric, and zenos when compared to the actual women in the expansion. it feels to me like the women of the expansion are by and far overlooked by people for the sake of the men and that general "he's so girl to me" contributes to it. Like there ARE women right there you know. like there are very very very good women just a few feet to the left. you can talk about how girlie estinien is to you but like. ysayle is right there. you can talk about how babygirl zenos is but also. there's fordola. you know that right. like you can enjoy the women too. it's ok.
and ofc genuine actual transfem headcanons are SO fucking good. I love them so much. keep going. But like that post has said, when it's only men in the fandom being treated as "he's so girl" (AND NEVER WOMAN!!!! ALWAYS GIRL!!!!!) it gets really really fucking tiring.
i love estinien! I really like Zenos! I get it! And if they are your favorite characters and you want specifically content about them and to make content specifically about them that is FINE!! but also, holy shit is it exhausting when it's like 99% about them and not a single glimpse towards the women of the story. yeah ffxiv's writing has a huuuuuuge fucking issue with women. and also.
#i dunno it's hard to write something ranty like this without it feeling like#i'm bashing people for their faves. i'm not!!!#im just a really fucking tired lesbian who wants to see women get content#and not just the men of the media with the excuse 'he's so girlie to me' or WHATEVER!!!!#please for the love of god like. it almost feels like people are scared to hc characters as trans.#and if you don't want to who CARES but also come on. come on do it. your faves are trans now. enjoy.#anyways. sorry for the rant. bleh.#I'M JUST MAD WHEN THERE ARE SUPER WELL WRITTEN WOMEN 20 FEET TO THE LEFT WHO GET ENTIRELY IGNOREDDDDDD#ok. 'super well written' is sometimes an exaggeration. and fuck it i'll admit it. MY babygirl has her issues.#you can really feel the pivot where they were like 'oh fuck we don't want her to be a VILLAIN villain what do we do'#'we already had her evil cackle at ish/gard being assaulted and people dying. what now.'#and her death. i've screamed about it enough.#but my point stands she's still just as solid as the other characters. give her some love.#ok. that's all. rant over.
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Black Widow: Deadly Origin (2010) #2 and #4
#I also really liked this aspect of Natashaâs characterization#her struggling with how she relates to and uses men#the contrast between the flatness when Tonyâs no longer playing her game#and when sheâs working Clint#compared to the intensity in her conversation with Steve who she has an actual real relationship with thatâs not at all based in attraction#but the fact that sheâs still that willing to betray people#well⌠men#also the fact that this book worked through the history of the various characters that Natasha has been closely associated with#meaning the men that sheâs been involved with#her relationships with women were limited to talking about Bobbi when Bobbi was unconscious and one panel with Yelena#itâs said in Captain America (2005) that Natasha really respects Sharon Carter#but I donât know how much theyâve actually been depicted together#my Natasha readings have been really patchy#so I donât know to what extent sheâs been written as having actual fleshed out relationships with other women throughout her history#also I will say that I was surprised that there wasnât a flashback scene recontextualizing Natashaâs history with Nick Fury#that felt conspicuous when their relationship came across as significant in the Natasha comics I have read#marvel#natasha romanoff#steve rogers#my posts#comic panels
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i guess this is the year i learn stuff about myself if nothing else.
#like I learnt that i like working around people#not like in a office setting of the same 4 people all day all week#I like interacting with lots of people during the day#they're fascinating#another thing i learnt is that I like to DO things - accomplish things#and well who doesn't you'll tell me#but it's not a given tbf#like I actually feel good when I've written something / worked something out in the courthouse#but also at home#I should be doing more stuff#I've also learnt that apparently i don't care that much about makeup and clothes#like sure i like pretty clothes#but im. not willing to sacrifice being comfortable just to look stylish#(this sounds very dumb ik but the amount of women i see walking around in impossible shoes and outfits ALL DAY LONG-- why girl whyy)#ive also learnt that I've actually been in love only once in my whole life#and that im in love with that person still#which is both tragic and very beautiful i guess?#just to end this list and go to sleep#apparently i really enjoy going to concerts alone#it's very freeing for someone who always feels like they're out of place#and not behaving ârightâ#im gonna adjourn this list methinks before the end of the year
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Twenty years ago, February 15th, 2004, I got married for the first time.
It was twenty years earlier than I ever expected to.
To celebrate/comemorate the date, I'm sitting down to write out everything I remember as I remember it. No checking all the pictures I took or all the times I've written about this before. I'm not going to turn to my husband (of twenty years, how the f'ing hell) to remember a detail for me.
This is not a 100% accurate recounting of that first wild weekend in San Francisco. But it -is- a 100% accurate recounting of how I remember it today, twenty years after the fact.
Join me below, if you would.
2004 was an election year, and much like conservatives are whipping up anti-trans hysteria and anti-trans bills and propositions to drive out the vote today, in 2004 it was all anti-gay stuff. Specifically, preventing the evil scourge of same-sex marriage from destroying everything good and decent in the world.
Enter Gavin Newstrom. At the time, he was the newly elected mayor of San Francisco. Despite living next door to the city all my life, I hadnât even heard of the man until Valentines Day 2004 when he announced that gay marriage was legal in San Francisco and started marrying people at city hall.
It was a political stunt. It was very obviously a political stunt. That shit was illegal, after all. But it was a very sweet political stunt. I still remember the front page photo of two ancient women hugging each other forehead to forehead and crying happy tears.
But it was only going to last for as long as it took for the California legal system to come in and make them knock it off.
The next day, weâre on the phone with an acquaintance, and she casually mentions that sheâs surprised the two of us arenât up at San Francisco getting married with everyone else.
âEveryone else?â Goes I, âI thought they wouldâve shut that down already?â
âOh no!â goes she, âThe courts arenât open until Tuesday. Presidents Day on Monday and all. Theyâre doing them all weekend long!â
We didnât know because social media wasnât a thing yet. I only knew as much about it as Iâd read on CNN, and most of the blogs I was following were more focused on what bullshit President George W Bush was up to that day.
"Well shit", me and my man go, "do you wanna?" I mean, itâs a political stunt, it wont really mean anything, but weâre not going to get another chance like this for at least 20 years. Why not?
The next day, Sunday, we get up early. We drive north to the southern-most BART station. We load onto Bay Area Rapid Transit, and rattle back and forth all the way to the San Francisco City Hall stop.
We had slightly miscalculated.
Apparently, demand for marriages was far outstripping the staff they had on hand to process them. Who knew. Everyone whoâd gotten turned away Saturday had been given tickets with times to show up Sunday to get their marriages done. My babe and I, we could either wait to see if there was a space that opened up, or come back the next day, Monday.
âIsnât City Hall closed on Monday?â I asked. âItâs a holidayâ
âOh sure,â they reply, âbut people are allowed to volunteer their time to come in and work on stuff anyways. And we have a lot of people who want to volunteer their time to have the marriage licensing offices open tomorrow.â
âOh cool,â we go, âBackup.â
âMake sure youâre here if you do,â they say, âbecause the California Supreme Court is back in session Tuesday, and will be reviewing the motion that got filed to shut us down.â
And all this shit is super not-legal, so theyâll totally be shutting us down goes unsaid.
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We donât get in Saturday. We wind up hanging out most of the day, though.
Itâs⌠incredible. I can say, without hyperbole, that I have never experienced so much concentrated joy and happiness and celebration of othersâ joy and happiness in all my life before or since. My face literally ached from grinning. Every other minute, a new couple was coming out of City Hall, waving their paperwork to the crowd and cheering and leaping and skipping. Two glorious Latina women in full Mariachi band outfits came out, one in the arms of another. A pair of Jewish boys with their families and Rabbi. One couple managed to get a Just Married convertible arranged complete with tin-cans tied to the bumper to drive off in. More than once I was giving some rice to throw at whoever was coming out next.
At some point in the mid-afternoon, there was a sudden wave of extra cheering from the several hundred of us gathered at the steps, even though no one was coming out. There was a group going up the steps to head inside, with some generic black-haired shiny guy at the front. My not-yet-husband nudged me, âThatâs Newsom.â He said, because he knew I was hopeless about matching names and people.
Ooooooh, I go. That explains it. Then I joined in the cheers. He waved and ducked inside.
So dusk is starting to fall. Itâs February, so itâs only six or so, but itâs getting dark.
âShould we just try getting in line for tomorrow -now-?â we ask.
âYeah, Iâm afraid thatâs not going to be possible.â One of the volunteers tells us. âWeâre not allowed to have people hang out overnight like this unless there are facilities for them and security. Weâd need Porta-Poties for a thousand people and police patrols and the whole lot, and no one had time to get all that organized. Your best bet is to get home, sleep, and then catch the first BART train up at 5am and keep your fingers crossed.
Monday is the last day to do this, after all.
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So we go home. We crash out early. We wake up at 4:00. We drive an hour to hit the BART station. We get the first train up. We arrive at City Hall at 6:30AM.
The line stretches around the entirety of San Francisco City Hall. You could toss a can of Coke from the end of the line to the people whoâre up to be first through the doors and not have to worry about cracking it open after.
âUh.â We go. âWhat the fuck is -this-?â
So.
Remember why they werenât going to be able to have people hang out overnight?
Turns out, enough SF cops were willing to volunteer unpaid time to do patrols to cover security. And some anonymous person delivered over a dozen Porta-Poties thatâd gotten dropped off around 8 the night before.
Itâs 6:30 am, there are almost a thousand people in front of us in line to get this literal once in a lifetime marriage, the last chance we expect to have for at least 15 more years (it was 2004, gay rights were getting shoved back on every front. It was not looking good. We were just happy we lived in California were we at least werenât likely to loose job protections any time soon.).
Then it starts to rain.
We had not dressed for rain.
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Here is how the next six hours go.
Weâre in line. Once the doors open at 7am, it will creep forward at a slow crawl. Itâs around 7 when someone shows up with garbage bags for everyone. Cut holes for the head and arms and youâve got a makeshift raincoat! So youâve got hundreds of gays and lesbians decked out in the nicest shit they could get on short notice wearing trashbags over it.
Everyone is so happy.
Everyone is so nervous/scared/frantic that we wont be able to get through the doors before they close for the day.
People online start making delivery orders.
Coffee and bagels are ordered in bulk and delivered to City Hall for whoever needs it. We get pizza. We get roses. Random people come by who just want to give hugs to people in line because theyâre just so happy for us. The tour busses make detours to go past the lines. Chinese tourists lean out with their cameras and shout GOOD LUCK while car horns honk.
A single sad man holding a Bible tries to talk people out of doing this, tells us all weâre sinning and to please donât. He gives up after an hour. A nun replaces him with a small sign about how this is against Godâs will. She leaves after it disintegrates in the rain.
The day before, when it was sunny, there had been a lot of protestors. Including a large Muslim group with their signs about how âNot even DOGS do such things!â Which⌠Yes they do.
A lot of snide words are said (by me) about how the fact that weâre willing to come out in the rain to do this while theyâre not willing to come out in the rain to protest it proves who actually gives an actual shit about the topic.
Time passes. I measure it based on which side of City Hall weâre on. The doors face East. We start on Northside. Coffee and trashbags are delivered when weâre on the North Side. Pizza first starts showing up when weâre on Westside, which is also where I see Bible Man and Nun. Roses are delivered on Southside. And so forth.
00000
We have Line Neighbors.
Ahead of us are a gay couple a decade or two older than us. Theyâve been together for eight years. The older one is a school teacher. He has his coat collar up and turns away from any news cameras that come near while we reposition ourselves between the lenses and him. Heâs worried about the parents of one of his students seeing him on the news and getting him fired. The younger one will step away to get interviewed on his own later on. They drove down for the weekend once they heard what was going on. Theyâd started around the same time we did, coming from the Northeast, and are parked in a nearby garage.
The most perky energetic joyful woman Iâve ever met shows up right after we turned the corner to Southside to tackle the younger of the two into a hug. Sheâs their local friend whoâd just gotten their message about what theyâre doing and she will NOT be missing this. She is -so- happy for them. Her friends cry on her shoulders at her unconditional joy.
Behind us are a lesbian couple whoâd been up in San Francisco to celebrate their 12th anniversary together. âWe met here Valentines Day weekend! We live down in San Diego, now, but we like to come up for the weekend because itâs our first love city.â
âThen they announced -this-,â the other one says, âand we canât leave until we get married. I called work Sunday and told them I calling in sick until Wednesday.â
âI told them why,â her partner says, âI donât care if they want to give me trouble for it. This is worth it. Fuck them.â
My husband-to-be and I look at each other. Weâve been together for not even two years at this point. Less than two years. Is it right for us to be here? Weâre potentially taking a spot from another couple thatâd been together longer, who needed it more, who deserved it more.â
âDonât you fucking dare.â Says the 40-something gay couple in front of us.
âThis is as much for you as it is for us!â says the lesbian couple whoâve been together for over a decade behind us.
âYou kids are too cute together,â says the gay coupleâs friend. âyou -have- to. Someday -youâre- going to be the old gay couple thatâs been together for years and years, and you deserve to have been married by then.â
We stay in line.
Itâs while weâre on the Southside of City Hall, just about to turn the corner to Eastside at long last that we pick up our own companions. A white woman who reminds me an awful lot of my aunt with a four year old black boy riding on her shoulders. âCan we say weâre with you? His uncles are already inside and theyâre not letting anyone in who isnât with a couple right there.â âOf course!â we say.
The kid is so very confused about what all the big deal is, but thereâs free pizza and the busses keep driving by and honking, so heâs having a great time.
We pass by a statue of Lincoln with âMarriage for All!â and "Gay Rights are Human Rights!" flags tucked in the crooks of his arms and hanging off his hat.
Itâs about noon, noon-thirty when we finally make it through the doors and out of the rain.
Theyâve promised that anyone whoâs inside when the doors shut will get married. We made it. Weâre safe.
We still have a -long- way to go.
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Theyâre trying to fit as many people into City Hall as possible. Partially to get people out of the rain, mostly to get as many people indoors as possible. The line now stretches down into the basement and up side stairs and through hallways Iâm not entirely sure the public should ever be given access to. We crawl along slowly but surely.
Itâs after weâve gone through the low-ceiling basement hallways past offices and storage and back up another set of staircases and are going through a back hallway of low-ranked functionary offices that someone comes along handing out the paperwork. âItâs an hour or so until you hit the office, but take the time to fill these out so you donât have to do it there!â
We spend our time filling out the paperwork against walls, against backs, on stone floors, on books.
We enter one of the public areas, filled with displays and photos of City Hall Demonstrations of years past.
I take pictures of the big black and white photo of the Abraham Lincoln statue holding banners and signs against segregation and for civil rights.
The four year old boy we helped get inside runs past us around this time, chased by a blond haired girl about his own age, both perused by an exhausted looking teenager helplessly begging them to stop running.
Everyone is wet and exhausted and vibrating with anticipation and the building-wide aura of happiness that infuses everything.
The line goes into the marriage office. A dozen people are at the desk, shoulder to shoulder, far more than it was built to have working it at once.
A Sister of Perpetual Indulgence is directing people to city officials the moment they open up. Sheâs done up in her nun getup with all her makeup on and her beard is fluffed and be-glittered and on point. âOh, I was here yesterday getting married myself, but today Iâm acting as your guide. Number 4 sweeties, and -Congradulatiooooons!-â
The guy behind the counter has been there since six. Itâs now 1:30. Heâs still giddy with joy. He counts our money. He takes our paperwork, reviews it, stamps it, sends off the parts he needs to, and hands the rest back to us. âAlright, go to the Rotunda, theyâll direct you to someone whoâll do the ceremony. Then, if you want the certificate, theyâll direct you to -that- line.â âCanât you just mail it to us?â âNormally, yeah, but the moment the courts shut us down, weâre not going to be allowed to.â
We take our paperwork and join the line to the Rotunda.
If youâve seen James Bond: A View to a Kill, youâve seen the San Francisco City Hall Rotunda. There are literally a dozen spots set up along the balconies that overlook the open area where marriage officials and witnesses are gathered and are just processing people through as fast as they can.
Thatâs for the people who didnât bring their own wedding officials.
Thereâs a Catholic-adjacent couple there who seem to have brought their entire families -and- the priest on the main steps. Theyâre doing the whole damn thing. Thereâs at least one more Rabbi at work, I canât remember what else. Just that there was a -lot-.
We get directed to the second story, northside. The San Francisco City Treasurer is one of our two witnesses. Our marriage officient is some other elected official I cannot remember for the life of me (and I'm only writing down what I can actively remember, so I can't turn to my husband next to me and ask, but he'll have remembered because that's what he does.)
I have a wilting lily flower tucked into my shirt pocket. My pants have water stains up to the knees. My hair is still wet from the rain, I am blubbering, and I canât get the ring on my husbandâs finger. The picture is a treat, I tell you.
There really isnât a word for the mix of emotions I had at that time. Complete disbelief that this was reality and was happening. Relief that weâd made it. Awe at how many dozens of people had personally cheered for us along the way and the hundreds to thousands whoâd cheered for us generally.
Then we're married.
Then we get in line to get our license.
Itâs another hour. This time, the line goes through the higher stories. Then snakes around and goes past the doorway to the mayorâs office.
Mayor Newsom is not in today. And will be having trouble getting into his office on Tuesday because of the absolute barricade of letters and flowers and folded up notes and stuffed animals and City Hall maps with black marked âTHANK YOU!âs that have been piled up against it.
We make it to the marriage records office.
I take a picture of my now husband standing in front of a case of the marriage records for 1902-1912. Numerous kids are curled up in corners sleeping. My own memory is spotty. I just know we got the papers, and then weâre done with lines. We get out, we head to the front entrance, and we walk out onto the City Hall steps.
It's almost 3PM.
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There are cheers, thereâs rice thrown at us, there are hundreds of people celebrating us with unconditional love and joy and I had never before felt the goodness that exists in humanity to such an extent. Itâs no longer raining, just a light sprinkle, but there are still no protestors. Thereâs barely even any news vans.
We make our way through the gauntlet, we get hands shaked, people with signs reading âCongratulations!â jump up and down for us. We hit the sidewalks, and we begin to limp our way back to the BART station.
Iâm at the BART station, weâre waiting for our train back south, and Iâm sitting on the ground leaning against a pillar and in danger of falling asleep when a nondescript young man stops in front of me and shuffles his feet nervously. âHey. I just- I saw you guys, down at City Hall, and I just⌠Iâm so happy for you. Iâm so proud of what you could do. Iâm- Iâm just really glad, glad you could get to do this.â
He shakes my hand, clasps it with both of his and shakes it. I thank him and he smiles and then hurries away as fast as he can without running.
Our train arrives and the trip south passes in a semilucid blur.
We get back to our car and climb in.
Itâs 4:30 and we are starving.
Thereâs a Carls Jr near the station that we stop off at and have our first official meal as a married couple. We sit by the window and watch people walking past and pick out others who are returning from San Francisco. We're all easy to pick out, what with the combination of giddiness and water damage.
We get home about 6-7. We take the dog out for a good long walk after being left alone for two days in a row. We shower. We bundle ourselves up. We bury ourselves in blankets and curl up and just sort of sit adrift in the surrealness of what weâd just done.
We wake up the next day, Tuesday, to read that the California State Supreme Court has rejected the petition to shut down the San Francisco weddings because the paperwork had a misplaced comma that made the meaning of one phrase unclear.
The State Supreme Court would proceed to play similar bureaucratic tricks to drag the process out for nearly a full month before they have nothing left and finally shut down Mayor Newsomâs marriages.
My parents had been out of state at the time at a convention. They were flying into SFO about the same moment we were walking out of City Hall. I apologized to them later for not waiting and my mom all but shook me by the shoulders. âNo! No one knew that theyâd go on for so long! You did what you needed to do! Iâll just be there for the next one!â
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It was just a piece of paper. Legally, it didnât even hold any weight thirty days later. My philosophy at the time was âmarriage really isnât that important, aside from the legal benefits. Itâs just confirming what you already have.â
But maybe itâs just societal weight, or ingrained culture, or something, but it was different after. The way I described it at the time, and Iâve never really come up with a better metaphor is, âItâs like we were both holding onto each other in the middle of the ocean in the middle of a storm. We were keeping each other above water, we were each otherâs support. But then we got this piece of paper. And it was like the ground rose up to meet our feet. We were still in an ocean, still in the middle of a storm, but there was a solid foundation beneath our feet. We still supported each other, but there was this other thing that was also keeping our heads above the water.
It was different. It was better. It made things more solid and real.
I am forever grateful for all the forces and all the people who came together to make it possible. Itâs been twenty years and weâre still together and still married.
We did a domestic partnership a year later to get the legal paperwork. Weâd done a private ceremony with proper rings (not just ones grabbed out of the husbandâs collection hours before) before then. And in 2008, we did a legal marriage again.
Rushed. In a hurry. Because there was Proposition 13 to be voted on which would make them all illegal again if it passed.
It did, but we were already married at that point, and they couldnât negate it that time.
Another few years after that, the Supreme Court finally threw up their hands and said "Fine! It's been legal in places and nothing's caught on fire or been devoured by locusts. It's legal everywhere. Shut up about it!"
And that was that.
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When I was in highschool, in the late 90s, I didnât expect to see legal gay marriage until I was in my 50s. I just couldnât see how the American public as it was would ever be okay with it.
I never expected to be getting married within five years. I never expected it to be legal nationwide before Iâd barely started by 30s. I never thought Iâd be in my 40s and itâd be such a non-issue that the conservative rabble rousers wouldâve had to move onto other wedge issues altogether.
I never thought that I could introduce another man as my husband and absolutely no one involved would so much as blink.
I never thought Iâd live in this world.
And itâs twenty years later today. I wonder how our line buddies are doing. Those babies who were running around the wide open rooms playing tag will have graduated college by now. The kids whose parents the one line-buddy was worried would see him are probably married too now. Some of them to others of the same gender.
I donât have some greater message to make with all this. Other then, culture can shift suddenly in ways you canât predict. For good or ill. Mainly this is just me remembering the craziest fucking 36 hours of my life twenty years after the fact and sharing them with all of you.
The future weâre resigned to doesnât have to be the one we live in. Society can shift faster than you think. The unimaginable of twenty years ago is the baseline reality of today.
And always remember that the people who want to get married will show up by the thousands in rain that none of those whoâre against it will brave.
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Oh boy. You know, I really love how you've cut some of those panels out. Here's a little more context on Oliver very clearly laying a solid chunk of what's wrong with Jason at Bruce's feet:
And you know what, you're right! No one's ever obligated to forgive everyone or anyone ever! But also guess what! You're also ignoring like... a lot of stuff actually. You think the batarang is the only thing people have an issue with.... as if it exists in a vacuum as the only thing Bruce has ever done wrong to Jason ever? Because most people aren't so much mad over a single incident as we are over it happening again and again and again.
RHATO Rebirth v2 #25
Batman and Robin uhhh Issue 6 I think? Going off the omnibus, sorry
Batman #138* *yes I'm aware that Bruce is being influenced by "Zur-En-Arr" in this, but honestly? I've always felt that this & the Batman & Robin one were some of the more in-character examples of Bruce's flaws manifesting in abusive ways
Or maybe some of these are too recent. Let's talk my personal favorite little beef that I like to contrast with Ollie:
Batman #424-425 The Diplomat's Son & Consequences
Ollie, on the other hand, when his charge commits a murder that Ollie thought could be prevented:
Now there's something to be said for how the writers for these stories had very different opinions of the sidekicks that were responsible, Starlin, for example, fucking hated Jason (Well, Robin in general) and wanted him dead, and it's deliberately set up to be a question of whether or not Jason actually did. Regardless, Bruce pretty cleanly absolves himself of any wrongdoing in his upbringing of Jason, whereas Ollie takes responsibility for Mia being in the position that she even could/would make that kind of call. And at this point, Oliver had Mia with him for a lot less time than Bruce had had Jason.
If it was Just the batarang, then, frankly, I think it's be a lot less controversial. This isn't even everything OR the worst panels from those incidents!!! I'm just cherrypicking, just like you were. And you know what, let me add this:
According to Bruce, Ollie's a pretty forgiving guy, it looks like. And if we're taking more Rebirth into account, Oliver was pretty chill about Cheshire hanging out with his family, and she's definitely caused her fair share of problems for the family and world at large on scales Jason has yet to even touch*, regardless of if she's Lian's mom. *some of Jade's crimes are dubiously canon, but with the reality mashing from Convergence in a way all of it is.
Ollie is a lot of hot air. I love the man, and he'll rip anyone and everyone a new one at the drop of a hat for any godsdamned reason. Pretty sure he's called Bruce and Barry and Hal all fascists before, so he has no hesitation in saying the absolute worst about people while... still having a relatively decent relationship with them in the long run, actually. Hal even used to be a villain for a while and Oliver was forced to kill him and now they're buds again. An alternate version of Hal that is STILL that villain continues to torment Oliver and his family.
Would Jason need to actually work to earn forgiveness from the Arrows? Probably. But he's still friends with Roy now (yes, CURRENTLY. AS HE HAS BEEN FOR OVER A DECADE he hasn't even been features in much w/ Roy lately but it has been REFERENCED), and even if it was small that olive branch of helping Roy and Lian reunite (and their general friendship, actually) isn't something that Ollie would just brush off, just as he wouldn't just brush off the events of Seeing Red.
But, in the grand scheme of things, kidnapping her, sending him on a wild goose chase across town, "having a talk" (mia's words) then letting her leave unharmed, and blowing up a building behind her is honestly small potatoes in comparison to the Repeated incidents of textbook abusive relationships that goes on between Bruce and Jason. (And I cannot overemphasize how little Mia was injured by this incident.)
Of course Olie was talking shit about Jason in the interim, Red Hood is incredibly dangerous, and he's scared for her safety. You can SEE how stumped he is by her coming out of this completely unharmed. Plus! This is hot on the heels of her return after the Dr Light Incident, and Ollie has every right to be scared out of his fucking mind.
But when it comes down to it, Mia Was Not Harmed. I will not stop saying that. Because in the world of villains and superheroes and red Hood doing significantly worse shit to other characters, this is NOTHING. Even actually within Arrow comics???? This WAS NOTHING.
And oh my god "He did the same thing Joker did" okay so where do I start with this
a) that was the point, obviously.
b) he didn't, actually.
c) that was the worst description of both incidents I've ever read in my entire life. Joker didn't "take a kid from his father and torture him and make him doubt his place in his family" unless you're talking about the fucking Arkham 'verse!
c2) actually let's break down that description: "took a kid from their father figure" Joker didn't take Jason, he was sold out by his mom. "Beat them up" understatement, but go off. "Tortured them mentally about their place in their family" not really. Joker just beat him nearly to death laughing for the most part, Jason's doubts about it came after he came back to life and saw news that Joker was still alive.
d) hmmm I wonder who said it was just Jason messing with Bruce...
Hm. Yeah. Bruce is definitely the most reliable source for Jason's intentions. I mean, was it generally to spite Bruce? Probably, yeah. But Jason's very good at multitasking and layering his intentions.
e) once again, Mia was not harmed. Jason spent most of their sparring match on the defensive, And only hit Her, physically, like, four times? and all of them in retaliation to her getting in close and hitting him first*? (And, trust me, if Jason can pull the hypercompetent bullshit that is "Seemingly shooting wildly but managing to hit nothing but THE STRING OF MIA'S BOW while also accounting for how she'd dodge" he could do sooooo much worse.) Notably, he briefly had her pinned to the floor with his hands around her throat... and then let up just after he held it long enough to make his point *Note: this is not a justification, she had every reason to fight back with everything she had and what Jason does is very fucked up on like...a normalscale. But it's worth noting he was Very Visibly and outright explicitly "teaching" her throughout it and it's soooo much less than any other villain has done to her.
This doesn't read to me "Making her doubt her place in her family" so much as "Emphasizing their similarities" this is the kind of speech the villain gives when he's trying to recruit the hero. (something which, hilariously, he mocked the idea of in UTH) But you know, all interpretations of canon are valid, although...
Funny enough, this also is very much not what Joker Did, actually. I mean, I don't recall Joker letting Jason have ANY agency at all, really. Just started breaking bones.
Now, I didn't post all of them because if I kept going it'd just be the whole comic, but yeah he does very much air out his daddy issues and compare them to her relationship with Ollie. It's clear that while he does know a lot about Mia... he also doesn't know much about Ollie. At least, not personality wise. Not how much genuinely better he is at this whole parenting gig.
This is so, so much easier to forgive, conceptually, than everything that goes on in the Batfam both from and to Jason and from and to OTHER MEMBERS OF THE BATFAM without involving Jason at all!!! (Birthdays, amirite?)
And, honestly, I'm probably seeing a lot of the posts that you are, and the ones making the Jason & Ollie bonding posts? Aren't really the same ones going on about the Batarang Incident. We've moved on to the rest of the, gestures above, Patterns of Abuse. If we discuss anything past post-crisis at all. (Speaking of post crisis, I actually remember Jason doing a pretty big solid for one of Oliver's close friends... hmmmmmm. Oh, yeah, he helped out when Black Lightning was framed for murder by Slade so good that even HE thought he did it! Granted, that was pre-Mia. So he's not going to stop being wary, but it's not like Jason hasn't done good things that affected people close to Ollie either.)
And if Jason's emotions aren't an excuse, than, well, Bruce's aren't really an excuse either, are they?
Jason's not even the only one who gets abusive treatment from Bruce. And regardless of your personal interpretations of whether or not it's a valid Batman characterization, after multiple writers have written this kind of thing across multiple continuities, there comes a point when you have to accept that this is a genuine flaw that Bruce carries and find a way to reconcile it with everything else.
And if we're going off of canon-gospel, Jason's own behavior has steadily trended towards more and more fangless, more palatable, in a way that given exposure Oliver would probably tolerate, considering all the others that he tends to tolerate. He still seems to regard the Batclan in general as a dumpster fire, "None of my kids would take a shot at me" he says, completely correct, while Batman's kids wouldn't even hesitate. He rolled up with unsolicited advice about Batman's relationships multiple times, all correct, and gotten shot down or ignored as if his significantly fewer incidents of being a shitty parent that he's very self-aware about somehow make him unqualified to speak at all!
Sometimes the reason that people are writing this, is because they like Ollie more than Bruce, because he knows how to actually apologize and actually do better. And trying to ignore canon in favor of making "good dad" Bruce stories, can wear you down when you just keep seeing Bruce depicted worse and worse and worse, and so maybe you want to start seeing the people trapped in Bruce's vortex move away from that.
And among those in that vortex, Jason has it the worst. Like, this isn't a competition. Some of the shitty stuff that Bruce does to him could be argued to be just responses to what he does himself (victim-blamey, but you know what let's pretend it makes things okay) like uth, or RHATOv2#25 But... Batman & Robin? "Oh Bruce was upset about Damian."
What was it you said? Oh, that's right: "Your feelings being valid don't excuse the harm you do, guys."
Gotham War? I'm sure you'll make excuses for Bruce there. I mean, maybe implementing it was Zur, but, frankly, that "Failsafe"? That has "Bruce genuinely thought this" written all over it. Hypocrite. Considering what his response was to the last time someone messed with his mind.
Oliver... kind of is the canon version of fanon's "good dad Bruce" tbh. And sometimes people make that connection, see those parallels, and want to play with that. It's just a what if.
You know that thing about tragedies about how if anything happened any differently it could have been prevented, that someone could have been saved? Ollie fucks up, but, fundamentally, if Ollie had been in Bruce's position, he would have saved Jason, not by doing the impossible of making it there in time, but by putting Jason first and having healthy communication lmao. Because Bruce very explicitly didn't! He didn't want to talk about it because he was scared of the truth! Or, he was scared of what he believed to be the truth, which would be that Jason had killed. And that it wasn't Bruce's fault. Because it's never Bruce's fault if he failed to raise Jason in that way that took that instinct out. It's not his responsibility to have realized, as the adult in the situation, that Jason maybe shouldn't have been exposed to so much rape and murder at an impressionable age. It's not his responsibility to keep better track of his barely teenaged son who's going through severe trauma right in front of him because they failed to enact justice on someone.
And Bruce had a lot to say about what he thought about Jason that varied and, honestly, rang more as projecting his own issues onto Jason than matching up what was actually happening on the page. Better meta-writers than I have discussed how rarely we get Jason's POV in these situations, that we're TOLD a lot about Jason by everyone else who has an agenda to frame Jason in a certain way.
If you hate Jason Todd, or hate jayroy, then block the damn tags & add it to a content filter bcs generally the latter is always marked. if it's someone on your dash reblogging them and it's not tagged/hiding it then ask them to tag it so you can filter it or stop following them idc. Don't pretend your cherry picking of canon and willful out-of-context misinterpretations is any better than anyone else's.
I have seen many posts and fanfics who are going "Oliver works with Jason to annoy Bruce!", "Oliver protecting Jason from Bruce!", "Oliver deciding to annoy Bruce by being like a father figure to Jason!", "Oliver being so happy for Roy and Jason being together!", and etc, but in canon, Oliver HATES his guts.
Here is a compilation of Oliver thinking or talking about Jason from Seeing Red, which is the first Red Hood's story after Under The Red Hood, and the one time Oliver and Jason interracted in canon (if I'm not mistaken, they never did since):
For the last one, he is talking to Bruce and Jason is one of the "every damned manner of sociopathic fruit fly".
And like, Oliver and the Arrowfam are 100% justified in their dislike or hate. He literally pulled the same shit Joker did on them: took a teenager away from her father figure, beat her up, torture her mentally about her place in her new family and her usefulness, make her and her guardian think he was going to kill her, explode the building she was in in front of her father figure to make him believe he was too late... And all of that to get to Batman. He doesn't give a shit about Oliver or Mia, it's about Batman, it's about Bruce. Just like when the Joker killed him, it wasn't about him, it was about Batman.
And it doesn't matter that Jason changed, because others aren't obligated to forgive someone because they redeemed themselves. I do not believe that Oliver is fine with Jason, he is probably not very happy he hangs around Roy, and does NOT want him near Mia ever again, and certainly not his granddaughter, Liam. That's the man that kidnapped his daughter because he was mad at his own father, nope. He knows how it is to be annoyed with the Bat, and it doesn't justify this.
I can hear y'all seeing disregarding canon is fine, and yes, sure. But also, folks, you are such hypocrites if you want to keep in that Bruce threw a batarang at Jason's neck, and erase how it was an accident ("Batman doesn't make mistakes!" Firstly, he does, canonically, make huge mistakes sometimes. Secondly, the man was an emotional wreck, his son had come back to life and had been killing people and his other son, Dick, was maybe dead because his city just exploded. He is human, not a machine! Thirdly, it is simply fucking stupid for a character who is against killing to willingly inflict such a mortal wound.), but Jason being a huge asshole to others is either erased or excusable (your feelings being valid don't excuse the harm you do, guys). Talk about favoritism.
#dc#sidenote seeing red was written by winick just as UTH was and it's worth noting he is kind of ableist#for all that there's a lot of good stuff he writes he does so love to throw around terms like sociopath or psychosis like it's candy#tbh if Oliver knew half the Shit that Bruce does to Jason he would turn to bitch Bruce out again because how can you think that's helping#Even WITHOUT LIKING JASON he would call Bruce out because as I posted he VERY MUCH DID DO THAT. MULTIPLE TIMES.#also most of the ollie being a good dad to Jason posts going around right now are from someone who hasn't read RHATO and hates it#in fact a majority of jayroys you see fucking hate RHATO and have their own version of it in attempt to reconcile conflicting canon#But everyone just really wants to feel morally superior yeah?#I actually also very much love Bruce and it's very painful to me to see canon make him so cruel & abusive. over and over and over again.#Sometimes it's exhausting to try and reconcile all of that.#You stop making excuses.#Jason has done less and less harm over the years as writers generally try to redeem him despite the classism in their portrayals.#Bruce? has only gone on to do more and more harm to the people close to him with more and more in universe justifications.#And parental abuse is a lot more of a Real Issue that people relate to. That canon has accidentally made incredibly realistic portrayals of#Despite the fantastical proportions of some of it. And yet he's still a good man.#But no matter what Jason does to improve himself and be better he's still just the fuck up and wrong huh?#Sure there's no real reason for any of that.#At the end of the day Oliver's line with Jason would be whether or not Mia has the capacity to forgive and tolerate him.#And she would give Jason no end of shit but ALSO she values Roy & his opinions very highly#and you don't have to ship them for her to look at their CANON FRIENDSHIP and think âwell. If you see something in him then sure.â#âBut if he tries anything I'm taking the shotâ and Jason would respect that.#Mia cares so little she ain't even kicked Jason in the balls like Tim did#I always hate using Jade for this bcs I DC hates asian women but she did like nuke a whole fucking country.#which made no sense on a number of fronts but that's not the point. If we only accepted which comics âmade senseâ we wouldn't read comics#Jade nguyen I'm so sorry bbg but I'm makign a point even if I hate to do it.
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Hey so like many of you, I saw that article about how people are going into college having read no classic books. And believe it or not, I've been pissed about this for years. Like the article revealed, a good chunk of American Schools don't require students to actually read books, rather they just give them an excerpt and tell them how to feel about it. Which is bullshit.
So like. As a positivity post, let's use this time to recommend actually good classic books that you've actually enjoyed reading! I know that Dracula Daily and Epic the Musical have wonderfully tricked y'all into reading Dracula and The Odyssey, and I've seen a resurgence of Picture of Dorian Gray readership out of spite for N-tflix, so let's keep the ball rolling!
My absolute favorite books of all time are The Haunting of Hill House and We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson. Classic psychological horror books about unhinged women.
I adore The Bad Seed by William March. It's widely considered to be the first "creepy child" book in American literature, so reading it now you're like "wow that's kinda cliche- oh my god this is what started it. This was ground zero."
I remember the feelings of validation I got when people realized Dracula wasn't actually a love story. For further feelings of validation, please read Frankenstein by Mary Shelley and The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. There's a lot the more popular adaptations missed out on.
Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier is an absolute gem of a book. It's a slow-build psychological study so it may not be for everyone, but damn do the plot twists hit. It's a really good book to go into blind, but I will say that its handling of abuse victims is actually insanely good for the time period it was written in.
Moving on from horror, you know people who say "I loved this book so much I couldn't put it down"? That was me as a kid reading A Little Princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Picked it up while bored at the library and was glued to it until I finished it.
Peter Pan and Wendy by JM Barrie was also a childhood favorite of mine. Next time someone bitches about Woke Casting, tell them that the original 1911 Peter Pan novel had canon nonbinary fairies.
Watership Down by Richard Adams is my sister Cori's favorite book period. If you were a Warrior Cats, Guardians of Ga'Hoole or Wings of Fire kid, you owe a metric fuckton to Watership Down and its "little animals on a big adventure" setup.
A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry was a play and not a book first, but damn if it isn't a good fucking read. It was also named after a Langston Hughes poem, who's also an absolutely incredible author.
Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury is a book I absolutely adore and will defend until the day I die. It's so friggin good, y'all, I love it more than anything. You like people breaking out of fascist brainwashing? You like reading and value knowledge? You wanna see a guy basically predict the future of television back in 1953? Read Fahrenheit.
Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain and To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee are considered required reading for a reason: they're both really good books about young white children unlearning the racial biases of their time. Huck Finn specifically has the main character being told that he will go to hell if he frees a slave, and deciding eternal damnation would be worth it.
As a sidenote, another Mark Twain book I was obsessed with as a kid was A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Exactly what it says on the tin, incredibly insane read.
If Beale Street Could Talk by James Baldwin is a heartbreaking but powerful book and a look at the racism of the time while still centering the love the two black protagonists feel for each other. Giovanni's Room by the same author is one that focuses on a MLM man struggling with his sexuality, and it's really important to see from the perspective of a queer man living in the 50sâ as well as Baldwin's autobiographical novel, Go Tell it on the Mountain.
Agatha Christie mysteries are all still absolutely iconic, but Murder on the Orient Express is such a good read whether or not you know the end twist.
Maybe-controversial-maybe-not take: Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov is a good book if you have reading comprehension. No, you're not supposed to like the main character. He pretty much spells that out for you at the end ffs.
Animal Farm by George Orwell was another favorite of mine; it was written as an obvious metaphor for the rise of fascism in Russia at the time and boy does it hit even now.
And finally, please read Shakespeare plays. As soon as you get used to their way of talking, they're not as hard to understand as people will lead you to believe. My absolute favorite is Twelfth Night- crossdressing, bisexual love triangles, yellow stockings... it's all a joy.
and those are just the ones i thought of off the top of my head! What're your guys' favorite classic books? Let's make everyone a reading list!
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okay finally dleepy.time I think good lord I wish i had the sleepy medicines but I'm OUT . I was reading tjis long form fic I've been reading too but it got so tense and bitter (THE ROMANXE TENSION AND FUMBLED BAG MOMENTS) ouhhhh
#i gotta be so careful reading fic exploring internalized homophobia & the . they kissed but got scared & the otjer blames himself#scared tjis fic gonna hurt me in tje end but for now its really well written and good#as a gay man who used to date women its refreshing seeing a richie where its like oh yeah hes dated women hes been w women but He Is Gay .#not enougj people understand the nuance of yeah you coulda still enjoyed the relationships w women bht ultimately its not the Big Spark of#Joy ... vs tje most popilar of uhh actually thats impossible . its misery only until#until you are out and gay and like wow that was all da WORST EVER pretend it didnt happen#i think i lost how i was wanting to word it . đ oh yeah people like naw youre just bi . i love bi peeps but its not always the case ...#idk im on my pissed abt confirmed canon people getting put as bi or pan but this is a personal gripe#either way . FIC GOOD !!!!#does a bear blog in the woods
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