#but anyways idk how someone noticed but
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Lmfao I just remembered that dumb story of the school nurse when i was little
#Okay so basically#when i got a really bad skin infection on my neck from being scratched by my guinea pig#it was rlly bad and i had to go to the doctor for it to get multiple prescription creams or something#i even had to get this special shampoo so that my skin wouldnt get irritated more#it was rlly bad and my skin was scabbing and flaking#and anyways my mom had me wear a turtleneck to hide it at school and told me to try not to scratch it#but anyways idk how someone noticed but#one day during class i randomly got called up to the office#i was confused#i went there right#and the nurse is waiting for me#and the nurse takes a look at my neck and says 'poor thing'#she has me sit down#AND SHE GRABS A BANDAID?.#A SMALL REFULAR BANDAID U WOULD USE FOR A CUT#and she tries to get my hair out of the way#and then proceeds to place one bandaid down.#and she tells me im good to go#like: ???#but i still hardly spoke english back then so i didnt even say a word the entire time#also the bandaid didnt even reach my skin it literally only stuck to my hair#when i got home#My mom was FURIOUS#LMFAOOA#i still dont know who reported it bro like just mind ur own business i was already having treatment for it u dont gotta get me sent up#its not like the nurse would do anything 😭#angryborzois rambles
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one day we will talk about how tennis fans talk about/treat players they find attractive versus players they dont…………
#and sorry but. a lot of you do this!#im sure i do it as well#but sometimes it’s just feels like…idk really obvious that that’s what’s happening#idk it pisses me off. but especially with the wta it feels reductive sometimes to call it out#like ‘oh you’re only supporting her bc she’s pretty’ like EWWW. what a nasty thing to say#BUT i do think it’s true sometimes!!!!#not that people only support players they think are pretty#but that people are far more sympathetic or that they’re more likely to get behind a player they aren’t *usually* a fan of#does this make sense?#and i think it extends to the atp as well but partially less obvious bc ppl let men get away with anything anyway lol#lowkey it feels mean to talk about because any comparisons i make have to insinuate someone’s attractiveness…#but like it really feels like the elephant in the room sometimes…like how do you not see what you’re doing here#and can i be real! i think karo is a massive beneficiary of this!#and i think that’s part of why i notice it so much because i notice the way people talk about her and support her (which of course i love)#but then i compare that with other players who have had similar stories…and i feel like i do have the perspective here—#because i see so much of what is said about karo#so it feels quite obvious when she’s honestly? treated *very* well considering her career#we’ve seen plenty of players who have injury issues who are just labeled inconsistent or as having ‘physical issues’#i think karo gets a lot of sympathy in comparison…and id even go so far as to say i think she’s overhyped sometimes!#which i know is a wild thing to say as a huge fan of hers but i think it’s true! idk. this is not really the point but im trying to explain#what i meant by the earlier tags. that some players who are seen as attractive are given way more leniency in general
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can we just talk about how incredible wandee goodday is with their narrative devices though? the foreshadowing is incredible. there's symbolism everywhere. the oyeicher/yakdee juxtapositions are so good. even though their words and actions might contradict each other, everything gets spelled out for us so clearly, it's beautiful.
#i've rewatched it a few times now and just keep finding new things every time#when dee goes to visit yak in the training camp and yak is trying to think of who he likes more? dee's shirt says favorite.#the crosswalk scenes? yeah.#don't get me started on some references possibly to the last episode i've already noticed#the obvious ones are the LED signs in his apartment and the colours of course#idk i feel like the show is SO obvious about literally everything#everything below is just me rambling about nothing#wandee goodday#i have a hard time grasping how some people seem to not understand why the characters do what they do#but then again it's incredibly easy for me in general to be able to see things from someone else's pov especially if we have this much info#like ugh they both just have so many reasons to be doing what they're doing it's so auuguhdghghg boys i get it but auaughfhg#the frustration i understand#we're supposed to be frustrated and annoyed at the miscommunication because we know#but genuinely being mad at them and not understanding why they do what they do????#anyway i think it's great and well set up thank you
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im going into my new work tomorrow, first time ever😐
#i was supposed to go in yesterday but um#so basically i did whatever training i was never even aware existed on a platform i was never told of#which has progress for every lil step i do so my manager literally could see i hadnt even logged on n couldve warned me any time#but never did 4 some reason. like even a days notice like heyyy have u gotta blah done n not as im abt to exit to work#BUT ANYWAYS so i tell her i got it done n shes like awesome i make new schedule (since she said we have 2 completely rid the old one#i dont get an update until 4 days later. all she did was add THREE training days (im supposed to have 6 cus it's a hard job)#on TOP of my old schedule. so i have 3 days i know are training days and then a solo day bcs that solo day was going off my old schedule#so it's like. which days do i go on then. bcs u said i cant come in at all bcs we'll have to make a completely new schedule#and then the new schedule is just. 3 added days. on top of my old one#sunday i was scheduled for training & there was No trainer scheduled with me. it was just me#sunday wasnt one of the 3 new days added. it was from the old schedule she literally told me to ignore#n then all a sudden today i get an email from someone who was supposed to be training me (name not even on the schedule tho)#n shes like hey im in the building are u lost or smthing :)?' mind u im asleep . so she probably thot she was wasting her time for a good hr#i emailed her an apology n an explanation but UGH r u fucking serious?? IF I KNEW THAT WAS A (NEW) TRAINING DAY I WOULDVE WENT#I JUST WANT TO GET USED TO THIS NEW THING & IT'S JUST GETTING FUCKED LIKE I DONT EVEN HAVE A BADGE YET BRO#like i was suspicious of going in sunday bcs it wouldve lined up nicely with the 3 added training days#but manager TOLD me she was adding a whole new training schedule! i double check n all she added were THREE days! thats it!#how was *i* supposed to know sunday was supposed to be 1 of those days when ive been staying at home ignoring the schedule u said 2#BCS U SAID 2. AND ALSO. THERE WAS NO TRAINER ON THE SCHEDULE.#even tho the drive is far. i wouldve driven up there today to see if i could shadow if i had known there was someone to shadow there#bcs even if i was wrong abt the day 2 come in at least i wouldnt waste my time but i didnt even know if there was someone there with a#trainer title. so i just missed a day i didnt even know i rlly had. FOR NOTHING. UGHH. I FEEL SO STUPID. I HATE MISCOMMUNICATION#im so scared of coming in now. sverybodys gonna think im dum n what if i have issues training then theyre gonna be like#we spent all this time on bro n he had all this time 2 prepare n he still sucks like damn we should just give up#i would 2 but i hate not seeing things to completion so. ugh. hate it here. idk what 2 say. EMBARRASSING#i hate miscommunications i hate feeling stupid
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tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"
#bakuspeech#number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u#he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up#(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out)#we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment#and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here#but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something#but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku#but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this#this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and#that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing#but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it#its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with#and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually#I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay#but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol#not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real#and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself#and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god#that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao#but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them#have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway
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can I be so open and vulnerable with you guys. the card I was given from people at my old office was sincerely so nice and really validating but also I feel like the main impression I left other people with was "she's really nice" WHICH IS GOOD, I DO WANT TO BE KNOWN AS NICE but also part of me is like... should I maybe strive for "innovative" or "creative" or "a go-getter" because being The Nice One just feels a little mealy-mouthed of me y'know?
#I think there is something to be said here for being so averse to conflict and also such a control freak that I spend incalculable energy on#making other people happy/comfortable/cool-with-me so on and so forth#like this has been a problem in past friendships too as I've grown up#and I've noticed it even online like sometimes I'll have A Take and I won't post it because I don't want to be negative about something#that someone else may like or whatever#which is GOOFY because some of my favorite people are those with strong personalities (bc it's a CLEAR VIEW of that person's personality!!)#and yet here I am like "tee hee I'm so nice everyone likes me because I'm nice anyway when I look in a mirror all i see is a blank wall''#lol y'know? and like no I certainly express opinions and express emotions other than Just Being Happy#and also any waylaid attempts at being so neutral as to not offend people uhhhhh don't work. ask me how I know#(I know because people have hated my guts on the internet before lol)#so it's like: this performance is truly for no one but yourself AND!!!! *AND* it's not even good for you because you might not actually be#being your authentic self#anyways I'm afraid to be a hater and also I'm afraid people won't like me so I try hard to make them like me#and THAT leads to me getting a very nice card about how everyone likes me and me inevitably going: but do they know and like the REAL me#lololololololol that's so goofy#anyway kids be yourselves#also what can I say I derive great pleasure from trying to be the nicest person a cashier interacts with on a given day so#idk there's a middle ground to be struck therein and I'm still navigating it
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some Goodreads reviews are very literally "don't threaten me with a good time"-coded
#romance novel blogging#this is especially true with ~romantasy (fantasy romance) tbh#'all they did was bang' okay yes#and what about it?#the reviews for kerri maniscalco's books are especially hilarious in this regard#but i've noticed it more and more and it's like... again.... NOBODY WANTS TO HAVE FUN ANYMORE#like girl i'm sorry you wanna read 700 pages of someone learning how to spark fire with her fingers#or pull carrots#i would rather..... read about banging#and then there can be an abracadabra fight idk#anyway this is gonna come back to haunt me when i publish a fantasy romance someday but i stand by it
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a great way to combat genAI in the future would be educating kids (and teens and college students and all ppl) on art way more.
#i had art classes growing up but i know a lot of ppl didn't and even less kids get art classes nowadays#we need all kinds of art classes too! music and history and painting and woodshop and drawing and life drawing#i think art history is especially important bc it connects us to our past and shows why art is so important#and all kinds of art classes help kids develop different important skills#like fine motor skills and critical thinking and making choices and noticing details and how to really SEE things rather than just looking#and a lot of art skills like woodworking and ceramics and sewing are all very practical basic adult skills that we should all get to learn#there's reasons arts and crafts and other skill based electives are the first to go and its not just bc they're undervalued#its cause a population that feels capable and confident and skilled and knows how to think critically#is harder to make work shitty jobs for shitty pay#harder to control!#same reason they're banning so many books and trying to make education worse#damn maybe i should learn how to teach better#im already planning to at least try doing a workshop for adults but maybe if i end up liking that#i could work towards being able to teach kids#i feel like teaching kids would be harder cause idk what concepts they do or dont know at whatever age they are#id have to do research and maybe talk to someone who has experience teaching art to kids#but even a simple art class would be beneficial i think#like going outside to draw things in nature maybe#or portrait drawing#or a class on how to make comics or animate on paper to impress their friends lol#i would've loved that!#id have to do that with the help of another teacher maybe#idk#vague future plans#anyway the reason education would help combat ai is cause ppl would learn abt what goes onto making art#all the choices and skills and thought#and they'd be able to more easily see the difference btwn real art and ai images and understand why making art is important
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theres a really. special kind of despair in the uncertainty brought about by moments of success and achievement. the inevitable “what now” of reaching your goals. and i kind of wish someone had warned me how hollow graduating university would feel, tbh
#taylor.txt#im miserable primarily for other reasons right now but i dont think i appreciated how much this just…wouldnt feel like anything#i think especially in my case as someone who so desperately needed ‘going away to college’ to get out of my childhood situation#and now for the past 5 years everything ive done has been for the purpose of getting my degree and finishing school#like im fine i guess i just kind of wish i could feel proud of myself or happy its over instead of like dreading the ceremony and feeling#like everything i have to do for grad is just one more thing i have to check off a list. getting my grad photos done felt nice but idk#it kind of feels like no one really cares which. idk why i would expect it to NOT feel that way. but yeah#tl;dr im around Kinda…need to finish stuff up but im over the really busy part of this all. kinda just coasting to the end here tbh#when this is over i’m gonna get to my request fics. prommy. wanted to do them over the long weekend but i was sick :(#anyway like to be clear im fine. people have been pointing out today i seem down and i think embarrassingly a collection of my students#noticed me crying on the bus today but thats life i guess you make do. im sad and thats ok. tbh
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😇
#lmaoooo#so I just got home from hanging out with a friend#and I decided to try on some lingerie#just for fun 😇#and I noticed a set that (I think?) was the first set I ever bought#and I don’t think I’ve ever tried it on?#I might have tried it on but definitely haven’t taken pictures in it#there’s a lot of things I bought that I was going to do/use before I moved but didn’t :(((#anyway#and it’s a cute set with roses on it#(bought it cause rosicheeks get it 🌹🥰)#so I tried it on and I’m like ooo might as well take some pics even tho I don’t look all dolled up but it’s still a cute set#GUYS#idk how to take pictures anymore!!!!#I used to have a whole system when I was at my old place#had my tripod so I could set my phone at whatever angle I wanted#now I’m like#?????#how#to#do this#took a few and there ehhhhh#this is super itchy tho#someone needs to rip it off of me asap#shut up rosie
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I've always liked this line of dialogue from SQX, because it does feel like at the end of the day, no matter how much SQX says he can't stand PM, he does still have a decent grasp of his character.
And on the other side of this, these words are just especially pointed towards Pei Xiu, who does have a good relationship with his boss/ancestor, and also going off his backstory, Pei Ming may well have been the first person in his life to acknowledge him and his talents.
So the whole thing just feels extra sad.
#that said it does bug me that px never seems to feel guilt over his own actions only how those actions affect banyue and pei ming#get it together you sopping wet cat of a man!#i've always wanted to write this but don't have the skills necessary#but i think a lot about if pm's faith in px does feel uncomfortable - is he acknowledging him because he sees his worth#or because he's a pei (something that has never helped px in any way in life)#everyone calls px a nepo baby but no no he's a hard worker and earned what he has#if anything i feel like being pei ming's descendant is still dragging him down because he's the only upper court official we know of#who's playing subordinate to someone else instead of managing his own domain#(fandom always thinks he's middle court but no its stated several times that he ascended properly lol)#(and i just find that beautifully tragic and fitting in his own way)#(px: always the understudy never the lead)#aaaanyway this all contrasts in a fun way with sqx who is the actual nepo baby#is also worshiped in conjunction with someone else BUT never reduced to just that relationship#idk just as pei ming's relationship with both shiblings is important to me#i find sqx's relationship with both peis very fascinating and wish sqx + px could be explored more#and also I want to see where swd + px fit into all of this because there's also so much potential there!#(incidentally the thing that started all of this is i was skimming the russian tl for something the other day)#(and noticed this line was translated as 'pei ming would never behave in such a way')#(and just thought that sqx calling him 'pm' here instead 'your general pei' gives the line a different vibe haha)#(it's sounds both more intimate and pointed if that makes sense?)#(anyway can you tell i am very starved for peixuan content? both peixuans)#tgcf#random tgcf thoughts#shi qingxuan#pei ming#pei xiu
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okay what i have to say is lowkey embarrassing but i wanna bitch and it’s probably only embarrassing to me bc im shy about this stuff anyways the moral of the story is i wanna bitch and u should probably just ignore me. god bless
#honestly halfway through the wedding i did see this guy i thought was rlly cute#like. REALLY cute (so fucking embarrassing)#but i’m too shy to talk to hot people and i’ve never approached anyone before and no one’s ever approached me so i don’t know what to do#idk how to talk to people to begin with let alone like. try to flirt or something#but as the night went on (this is so embarrassing) for some reason i literally couldn’t stop looking at him (kill me)#and he probably definitely noticed me looking at him so he probably thinks im some like. crazy creep or something#but like usually when i see someone attractive im just like oh wow and admire them from afar#but i COULDNT STOP LOOKING AT HIM! WHY! and for some reason i felt like i just really wanted to talk to him#but i didn’t know what to do! i just felt this urge to go try and start a conversation but i just. i couldn’t#and every time i thought i would work up the courage either my sister or my grandmother would come back and hover over me#and i didn’t wanna be like ‘sorry gotta go i need to go embarrass myself in front of this cute guy’#OR he would get up and start taking pictures again. it’s like he knew#he wasn’t even the official photographer he was just one of the guests who clearly wanted to take photos of his friends wedding. which like#is so endearing to me. he has HOBBIES. WOW. (kill me)#idk j can’t even put everything into words i just feel like screaming into a pillow AAAAAAUGHHH#i felt like i was in hs again there was a point i even excused myself to step outside just because he was out there#but he was talking to some old lady. so i was just sitting outside in the grass moping#i feel so stupid i dunno. why am i so worked up about this. i had a few opportunities to approach him and i didnt. because im an idiot#i feel like i’m down so bad which is so STUPID because i don’t even know his name and ill never see him again in my life#so it doesn’t even matter! and every time im like oh oh well it was just random infatuation clearly it wasn’t meant to be#but then i just get upset and all blushy cause he was SO CUTE! and i wanna know more about him! why!#i haven’t felt like this in FOREVER i just feel so stupid for even feeling this way#i know ill be fine in a few days or something but im just like. i wish i could have at least spoken to him once#sigh. idk what’s wrong with me#maybe he’s already dating someone anyways all the cute people seem to already be in relationships#except ME im the only one left. who am I supposed to date!!#i want to jump out the window#snow.txt
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🙄🫠
#yk when i said i'm back to being active on tumblr well yeah 😅#i had to write a seminar paper for uni and it hasn't been going well because i got sick and didn't get much done#well i got an extension luckily but it still was a struggle the topic was just rly difficult to write about#i'm almost done now at least some 300 words i still have to write and then proofread and work on better formulating but yay#i should get it done today but yeah i'll manage so i'll be back when i'm done the latest tmrw#but seminar papers are for real my least favorite part of uni 😅 it's so time consuming and can be a real struggle ugh#i rather write an exam lmao#but anyway i needed to rant ://#my money got stolen 🙃😫#sometimes life just throws some shit at you ugh#like having to write this paper and not having a social life anymore isn't enougj#i don't know how it happened? i mean i don't know for sure but i can't explain it another way#like the money was in my wallet the day before yesterday and yesterday the whole day i didn't use my wallet qnd then it was gone??#maybe while i was at uni football but that's crazy it was not some public place but in a school gym lockerroom??#or maybe someone stole it from my backpack on the street idk?? but i didn't notice#but that was money i got for my birthday from my dad and aunts 😪#and i wanted to buy something nice with it and ig i will anyway but it sucks :((#it was not a little no i had 150€ in my wallet 😭 at least my credit cards are still there ig#but i realize now how stupid that probably was to carry so much money with but i thought it was safe fr#like i have lived in austria all my life and this never happened to me 😫 and it was not like i was walking around with my wallet openly#i mean i will be fine it would be a lot worse if that happened to someone who is just barely getting by but i'm still upset#and my mom told me that apparently it happened to a friend of her as well when she was in my city but like i never heard that before...#from any of my friends ... or maybe it really is that more dangerous with thieves in my uni city but like i wasn't aware#bc i mean in general austria is like a very safe country comparatively and feels like it never was on my mind#maybe it's horrible bad luck but in the future I will be careful to carry any cash with me 🙃
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Didn’t you say once that Oscar was the one who like inherited or bought the place that they run the shop out of and live in? So… is Oscar technically the boss cause he owns the place?
THAT WAS AN IDEA I HAD YEAH!!!!!!!!! i do think its a very funny idea if mochi does not actually own the lease to the building so one of them has the leverage to hold it over her head. cant be mean to oscar otherwise hes gonna kick us out LOL
but i think she does own the actual shop!!! hed be more like a landlord at that point
i had that idea back before lime joined the m34th because reasonably at that point oscar would be the only one with actual income, but actually now that lime has a really good job it wouldnt be too farfetched to say that hes the one who bought the house........hm.....
#lime being able to hold the whole ass house over mochis head whenever they have a fight is hilarious#(get out of my house) and no one can do anything because his name is the only one on the deed#anyway. all that to say. yes someone else technically owns the building#any of them would be the worst landlord ever because they wouldnt do anything#coco would complain about a broken pipe and immedately they phone it over to mochi#her magic handles all the house repairs#(though idk how much the house breaks...the inside is all magic)#(its bigger on the inside than on the outside)#mochi turned a creaky old 2 bed 1 bath into a 4 bed 4 bath with an attic and storage room#(the bedrooms nicely hidden so if any non-magic guest comes over they dont really notice how much bigger it is on the inside)
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ik i talk abt high control groups kinda often but i do encourage anyone involved in discourse in any capacity to watch folding ideas' "this is financial advice" video, because a lot of what he says about the gamestop apes being a self-organizing high control group imo also explains the more toxic discourse tendencies, and i feel like most discussion around high-control groups on here focuses on the tradtional kind that has one or a few distinct leaders which makes it harder to draw parallels between the signs. so i think its important to point out that these kinds of groups can still create that same energy as a unit even if there isn't one specific person calling the shots
#origibberish#namely the signs ive noticed most over the years are obviously internal jargon‚ thats kind of a given when working with microlabels#but see also transmed/truscum/trender/tucute/acey/theyfab/transandrophobia truther/etc etc etc#ideas being boiled down to short gotchas that just get ping ponged back and forth#see The Entirely Of Any Ace Discourse Argument for that but again see 'theyre just trans mras'#and the tendancy for members to turn on anyone who steps out of line even a little#omg i cqnt believe i forgot pro/anti discourse too theyre really bad about all of these on both sides#oh or another example would be steven universe discourse#like 'it endorses letting fascists off the hook' would just get thrown around as if it was undisputed fact despite there being MILES#of shit going on in the background to get to that#anyways. yeah 👍 keeping this in mind has already made a huge difference in how i engage in online discussions#and has also been a good rule of thumb for when to Stop engaging with someone#where if theyre displaying these signs thank you i do not want to be part of this#and like yes that goes for people youre arguing with but it obviously /ESPECIALLY/ goes for people you like#if you have a friend who you feel like you cant say anything that disagrees with them or theyll freak out at you. you dont have to keep#being friends with them. if being around someone makes you uncomfortable and you constantly find yourself making excuses for why#they treat you the way they do then thats a bad sign#and like with that i really hope ive managed to yknow. create a nice space here where ppl feel safe bringing stuff up?#idk
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Kung Fu Panda 4 is about generative AI and how inferior it is to real art made by real people
#idk whether someone already said it#but other than all the other themes I fully think this is the meta-theme of the movie#anyway I’m genuinely floored how not one out of FOUR movies is bad or uninspired#kung fu panda#dreamworks#the only thing I wanna know is why the furious five weren’t in it#like I fully think there’s something other than ‘they were on other missions’#and that’s very suspicious to me#it makes me think they were fired for joining the writers’ strike or something#and that sours my enjoyment unfortunately#because other than that I can’t really find any noticeable flaw in the movie itself
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