#but anyway its very been very relieving

[jenivi]

senioritis hitting me hard

[taxinealkaloids]

horrible children who are. so so mean to each other

[milkweedman]

my pieces got accepted to the local museum ! i was quite sure they'd been rejected because i was supposed to hear back over 2 weeks ago, but i guess there were just time issues. am very happy about this !

[seaweedstarshine]

Hi! Long time no yap but I've been really bothered by this thing and I know you're just the person I can go to with this (even if we don't always end up agreeing at times).

I got into a tiff with someone in a comments section of a post that was about Amy (Which character do you think deserved to become a villain? or something similar). They brought up Amy's abuse of her boyfriend. I may have tried to defend Amy (key word is tried. I am officially rubbish at debating) but then I may have said something? Because they said that I (and apparently a lot of other fans) was excusing Amy's abuse because of her trauma. It got me stumped because isn't young Amy's treatment of Rory rooted in her trauma? Did I miss the memo where we separate trauma and abuse? Am I missing something?

That statement bothered me a lot because if there's one thing I never want to do it's defend an abuser. So here I am, humbly asking and hoping to clear the muddy waters.

Your really confused and disturbed moot, Tia 💌

TIA!!!!! Thanks for the ask 💌 , and I send you all the hugs.

Discussion of abuse, trauma, ableism, infidelity, and unhealthy relationship dynamics beneath the cut.

(First off… while I really appreciate your faith in my explaining skills <3 <3 <3 my passion for traumatized characters and mentally ill+neurodivergent rights doesn't make me especially qualified to fully clear muddy waters especially not knowing the full context, but I feel you, and what follows is my informed perspective!)

Speaking generally first, harm done in media is best examined by the impact on the audience, with a different lens than harm done to real people. While relatable experiences in media can be useful and validating and incredibly important, you can’t be “defending an abuser” when the abuse is fictional. It's actually normal for traumatized/ND/mentally ill people to project onto mentally ill villains, when villains are the only significant representation for those stigmatized symptoms in a media landscape that excludes and demonizes us simply for existing. RTD can't stop people who hallucinate from reclaiming the Master's Drums and projecting onto the Master, for example — 90% of the best Doctor Who psychosis fic by psychotic authors is about the Master, whether RTD likes it or not. It's not true crime.

(This is speaking generally. Amy Pond is very much not the Master.)

Abuse is a behavior, and there can be many reasons for it, but reasons based in trauma don’t make it not abuse (some forms of generational trauma can propagate abusive parenting styles, when the parent thinks abusive parenting is normal, or lives entirely vicariously through their child). This absolutely should not be taken to mean trauma correlates with abusive behavior; rather that abusive behaviors from traumatized people are more likely to present in specific ways.

Abuse is also a targeted behavior, based in control — not consistently displayed C-PTSD symptoms as seen in Season 5 Amy Pond through many aspects of her life. Mental health symptoms don't become abuse just because they hinder one partner from meeting the other partner's needs. Any life event can do that.

Without knowing the context of the arguments, this is the aspect of their relationship I've seen you talk about before (which I also feel strongly about), and what I assume is what you were debating? So, here I will talk specifically in regard to Season 5.

We all know Amy — she's never attached to Leadworth because she never wanted to leave Scotland, no steady therapist because none of them stick up for her, can't stick with one job yet her first choice is a job that simulates intimacy because her avoidant behavior (a known trauma response) isn't sustainable to her wellbeing. Rory knows her fears of commitment stem from her repeated abandonments, it’s why he’ll always wait for her, and it's why he blames the Doctor “You make it so they don't want to let you down.”, who apart from having caused a lot of her trauma, has actively taken advantage of her being the “Scottish girl in the English village” who's “still got that accent,” because he wants to feel important, so yeah, I think interpreting Amy's issues (and how Amy and Rory transverse them) as Amy abusing Rory indicates a fundamental misunderstanding of their relationship, as well as a misunderstanding of the (raggedy) Doctor’s role in Amy’s formative self-image (which of course she works through in Season 6, but I am sticking to Season 5).

Abuse is always based in control. That just doesn’t fit here. While Amy's detachment from her real life includes things like calling Rory her “kind of boyfriend” (which she is upfront about to his face; differing commitment levels isn't abuse, though it can be a relationship red flag for both parties IRL) — her Season 5 disregard of Rory’s feelings occurs only in response to the fairytale embodiment of her trauma. It's never a response to Rory; it's a response to the Doctor, who stole her childhood and led her by the hand to her death. She cheats on Rory with the Doctor in her bedroom full of Doctor toys, drawings, models, she made from childhood to early adulthood.

(And yes, like many repeatedly-traumatized people, Amy is prone to being sensitive and reactive. Take her “Well, shut up then!” line in The Big Bang; but given Rory responds to this by hugging her, clearly he doesn’t take it as her actually dismissing him. He knows her better than that.)

And by no means do I meant to imply this is fair to young Rory, poor Rory, who's left struggling with the feeling that his role in her life is in competition with the role of her trauma (aka the Doctor). But not every unhealthy relationship dynamic is unhealthy because of abuse. Labelling Amy's treatment of Rory in Season 5 more accurately isn't the same as excusing her harmful choices — but making mistakes is part of being human, Amy's mistakes are certainly understandable, and she works through them out of love for Rory.

If there's one thing to say about Moffat women, it's that Moffat allows his female characters the same grace that the male characters *coughTENcough* have always had, to hurt and struggle and make realistic mistakes and overcome those mistakes and to heal without being demonized.

Amy isn't perfect, but she is a fully realized character, and her story gives us a resonant depiction of childhood trauma.

[penisbilt]

the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

[jasonisaacs]

aaaaah i woke up feeling super motivated today so i've spent all day working on the next chapter of my lorca/oc fanfic and it's nearly done!! i just need to work a little more on the ending but i want to look at it tomorrow with a fresh mind. omg i'm so happy though 😭💖

[lotussokka]

thinking about jace talking to alec about his conflicting feelings for clary at alec’s “bachelor party”..... he really went to the expert on that topic didnt he?

[caffeinatedopossum]

I just heard someone say that getting married is the hardest thing they've ever done.

I'm sorry but if getting married is the hardest thing you've ever had to do, I don't think I can talk to you. That's fine, that's totally okay if that's hard for you. I just need a long moment of silence for my misjudgment of the average amount of suffering that any given human experiences.

[guinevereslancelot]

I'M NOT GOING BLIND 🥳🥳🥳

[theriverdalereviewer]

PEOPLE OF TUMBLR… YA GIRL IS FINALLY AN EMPLOYED TEACHER!!!

[luminouslotuses]

guys its getting difficult to stay positive about this lol

[drchucktingle]

On your blog you've talked about dealing with chronic as a result from the stress of masking your autism.

It's a bit of a different situation, but my little sister (who we've begun to suspect has adhd) has been experiencing chronic pain in her arms and legs. I may be totally off base, but I was wondering if a similar stess might potentially be a factor in her pain.

If you're willing, would you mind talking about how your pain affected before you found a way to manage it (I tried searching your tumblr, but not much came up, so sorry if I'm asking a question that's already been answered)?

Thanks either way, I love your books. Love is real!

sure buckaroo GOOD QUESTION. i have had chronic pain in some form or another for LONG TIME in a number of STRESS RELATED WAYS. in past it has been cracking teeth from clenching dang jaws while i sleep and things like that, but a few years ago it was FULL ON BODY PAIN AND TIGHTNESS like every muscle was clenching up. went to the doctor over and over all kinds of dang specialists and it was very difficult to figure out what was going on. eventually landed on a sort of nebulous trot of STRESS but i can get more specific.

there are several things about me that you would never know just from looking or even talking to me for long times. i am a bi buckaroo, i am a non-dysphoric trans buckaroo, i am an autistic buckaroo. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE THINGS IS EITHER HIDDEN AUTOMATICALLY OR I AM SUCH AN EXPERT AT HIDING THAT IT IS SECOND NATURE

autism presents its trot in many ways, so my words do not apply to all, but my version is EXTREME ORGANIZATION AND ENDLESS WORK ETHIC. in way of freud (which is a silly way but sometimes good for symbolism talk) i have what you would call an OVERDEVELOPED SUPER EGO which is a double edged sword. i can write 100s of books at an incredible pace, but also feel like my body is constantly collapsing in on itself

this is not really something i consciously think about much, but eventually these health problems started creeping up. it was all from carrying this mystery tension in my body, because while it feels EASY for me to mask i believe all that tension goes somewhere and it stores up and stores up and stores up.

so i think the HEALTHY way that i have found to deal with this (i think of it as releasing the steam valve a bit so the boiler does not break down) is ART. this space where i am allowed to be CHUCK TINGLE and write without obsessing over the spelling or punctuation, or to loudly express my queerness, or explore gender, and to let my neurotypical mask down DIRECTLY RELIEVES my chronic pain because it literally makes my muscles relax.

when i started out this ARTISTIC TROT as chuck i used a LOT of metaphor to keep my privacy, with different words or different versions of people for different things, and buckaroos found this very funny. as a way to express myself artistically i also liked this metaphor trot a lot, but i have also found that the LESS metaphor i paint over my life as chuck, the better it is for my health. if you have noticed, i talk less about some of the parts of my life that were metaphors, or maybe you have seen that my voice has relaxed a bit in interviews, or that i carry myself a little differently over time, this is partially why. (there is another artistic reason that was a planned trot from the beginning and it has to do with my feelings as a young autistic buckaroo of not fitting in on this timeline, but we can dive into that later).

anyway, as PRACTICAL ADVICE i would say that FINDING A SPACE TO EXPRESS YOURSELF WITHOUT FEAR OR MASKING has been the number one trot for me. that can be a pink bag over your head writing hundreds of erotic shorts, or that can be just laying on the ground howling your heart out, or doing whatever stim you need to do.

i will also say that ONCE I REALIZED IT WAS MUSCLE TENSION getting a physical therapist helped a lot. because there are two sides, you have to start releasing steam from the steam valve, but at the same time youve also gotta start HEALING THE DAMAGE. so i think stretching and techniques like that can be very helpful.

hope that helps buckaroo LOVE IS REAL

[0rph1x]

good morning tumblr dot com im normal again bc we cut contact so just! expect regular nonsensical posting! =D

[lerclan]

duct tape | lando norris

type: written + smau at the end

pairing(s): assistant!reader x lando norris

summary: youve been landos assistant for a while now and you were asked to do the most embarrassing thing ever, but it wasnt you that was the most embarrassed in the situation; it was your boss.

warning(s): a funny and POORLY edited photo of lando norris done by me (i was cackling making it 💀)

fc: luisinha oliveira!

---

"you want me to WHAT???" you spit out your drink.

"kiss him." the photographer, elise, says as you stare at your friend, eyes quite literally bulging out, "come on y/n..."

"you act like i kiss random people for fun." you say as you take a proper sip from your water.

"but hes not a random person?" she fires back as you roll your eyes.

"still. hes my boss and looking at the situation in general, thats quite embarrassing to do." you feel your face heat up, "how about we find someone else? i bet i can call someone with really luscious lips." you take out your phone and start scrolling through your contacts.

"no," she lowers your phone as you look at her, "he said he wanted YOU to do it."

"ME???" your jaw drops as elise starts laughing at your reaction, "youre lying."

"no im not!" she puts her pinky up as you intertwine your pinky with hers, "pinky promise."

"why me though?" you asked her curiously.

"i told him about the idea and how the stylist would do the kiss marks but he said he had the perfect someone to do the kiss marks and said your name." she explains as you give her a look, "okay to make it easier for you, hes gonna have duct tape covering his mouth. its for the aesthetics." your look immediately disappears and is replaced with a relieved expression.

"oh, you shouldve told me that earlier." you say as you finally smile, "that sounds a little bit easier to do."

"my bad, kind of forgot about it till i told you the story. woopsies." you laugh at her as she chuckles cheekily, "lets go to the set, its almost time for him to be ready."

you both arrived at the set and you noticed your boss all geared up next to an f1 car.

"i thought the set would be more scandalously themed, but this is so much better than what i anticipated." you let a breath out as elise laughs at you.

"do you think im a pornographer or something? gosh have faith in your friends innocence." she rolls her eyes jokingly and it was your turn to laugh now.

landos head instantly turned to your direction as he heard your laughter. he didnt know if you had agreed to the suggestion, but he hoped that elise didnt bring it up since he was feeling a little embarrassed now for acting impulsively with suggesting you to do the kiss marks instead of the stylist.

with how caught up he was in his thoughts, stressing over his impulsive move, he didnt realize that you guys were in front of him.

"lando? landooo???" you say waving your hands in front of his face.

"oh–yes? hi?" he says as he finally snaps out of it.

"you were zoning out. what were you thinking about this time?" you asked as he smiles.

"nothing in particular, just a little nervous on what to do in this photoshoot." he admits mostly.

"youre gonna do good, boss. dont worry about anything! just do what you usually do, your fans are gonna love it no matter what." you comfort him with a smile as he reciprocates the same expression.

you guys stare into each others eyes for a bit until elise finally interrupted you both.

"ahem! love birds can you guys contain yourselves for a sec–" you slap her shoulder lightly as she laughs at it as landos face turns a bit red, "i was just kidding!! anyways...im just here to tell you that y/n agreed to the idea, so ill be back with some duct tape and red lipstick." she walks off and you were left with lando.

"so...you agreed???" he asks as he feels his face heating up more from the fact that you agreed.

"yeah, at first i thought i was kissing you straight up...which is a very hard task to do considering our positions, but she told me you were gonna have duct tape over your mouth; so its like an indirect kiss. which i can mostly do." you answer his question with a small chuckle as he feels his face heat up more, "are you good, lan? youre looking kinda...red?? ish???"

"yeah, no, im fine. this is fine. im perfectly normal." he says quickly as you eye him out.

you reached for his forehead and noticed it was a little warmer.

"are you sure? you feel a little warm." you say as you start to panic thinking about his schedule for today.

"y/n, i am perfectly fine. its just the suit..." he lies as you look at him with doubtful eyes.

before you could pester him more, elise came back with red lipstick and duct tape just like she said.

"here, put this on your lips and also tape his mouth shut." she says as you grab the items.

"it will probably do us a favor if his mouth is taped shut." you joke as he rolls his eyes at you.

"gosh whats that supposed to mean?" he side eyes you as you laugh.

"it means..." you drag on as he looks at you, waiting for you to answer his question.

"it means wha—" his sentence gets cut off by you taping his mouth, "hmf mhmhf!!" he tries to talk but it comes out muffled.

"what did he say?" elise asks as you both laugh at his attempt.

"he probably said 'you muppet!', to insult me or something." you answer her, mimicking landos voice.

"sounds like him alright. perfect impression!!" she says as you take a small bow.

you put the duct tape down and opened the lipstick so you could put it on, kiss him, and get done with it already.

"you ready, lan?" you ask him as he puts his hands up to rip the tape off his mouth half way.

"no–wait. i need like a drink or something..." he comes up with an excuse as he feels his face get hot again due to the situation he put himself in.

"come on lando..its a quick peck and boom were finished!" you reassure him feeling a little flustered as you realize what youre actually doing, "come here."

he dodges you as you glare at him.

"WAIT. PLEASE GIVE ME A SECOND." he yells out as you roll your eyes getting impatient.

"okay fine." you go back to the spot you were standing in.

you look at him grab a bottle of water to drink and he starts fanning himself.

"are you sure youre good?" you asked as he nods his head quickly.

"dont worry about him, y/n. hes just feeling a little flustered because hes getting an indirect ki—" elise gets cut off by an empty water bottle getting thrown at her, "what the hell LANDO." she throws the water bottle back at him.

you laugh at their little squabble until the water bottle hit you and now theyre the ones laughing at you.

"I ALWAYS CATCH STRAY BULLETS I SWEAR. cant laugh in peace anymore..." you say as they laugh harder, "ANYWAYS, lando come here and let me kiss you." you feel your face heat up as soon as you realized what you really said.

"yeah let her kiss you lando." elise chimes in with a little melody.

"not like that–you know what–gosh whatever come on lando, you have places to be after this." you say finally grabbing his arm as he gets closer to you.

"okay, just do it..." he says as he grabs your arms and puts it around his neck, "WAIT WAIT WAIT AAAAHHHH!!" he yells out as he sees how close you guys are.

"LANDO MAN UP GOSH." you finally grab his face and kissed him on both of his cheeks, his forehead, and his lips. directly. completely forgetting the fact that his mouth was not taped shut.

you both dont notice that you guys were kissing lips directly until you both heard a camera click. you guys pulled back and thats when you noticed his lips completely covered in red.

"OH MY GOOOOSHHHH!!!!" elise squeals out as your eyes widen.

"I AM SO SORRY LANDO. I FORGOT YOU DIDNT HAVE IT ON–" you get cut off by lando.

"no, no. its totally fine, y/n...youre good. simple mistake. im completely normal and youre completely normal." he smiles at you, ready to explode from holding in a scream, as you smile back out of relief.

"also...ELISE DELETE THAT RIGHT NOW." you jump her as shes fighting for her life.

you suddenly feel somebody pull you back, which was lando with a huge grin.

"elise, let me see the photo." he says as you look at him.

elise unlocks her phone and pulls up the photo of you and lando kissing, which was a pretty cute angle and photo. you cursed her photography skills.

"you should totally send me that." he says as your jaw drops, "what? its a cute photo of us." he says not knowing where the confidence suddenly came from.

"before y/n dies from a heart attack, have her kiss you again. WITH the tape on this time." elise says as you felt your eye twitch, jaw still on the floor.

you eventually snapped out of shock and reapplied the lipstick so it was more pigmented and you kissed him again, with the tape over his mouth. you looked up at him and realized that he was smiling. you didnt know why, well you had a hint but you didnt wanna act on it.

lando quickly finished his photoshoot and now it was time to go to another place for an interview. you both entered the car and you were met with silence until he spoke up.

"sooo...do you maybe wanna go out for dinner tonight?" he asks breaking the silence as you look at him.

"arent you hanging out with carlos tonight??" you question him as he cheekily smiles at you.

"not–" he takes out his phone and texts carlos something and looks up to look at you, "anymore."

you laugh at his little act and smiled warmly.

"id love to have dinner with you, lan." you met eye contact as he smiles from ear to ear.

he grabs your hand and intertwines them together, keeping it that way till you both arrived at the interview place.

---

landonorris

Liked by ynnn, mclaren, elise_amor, and 1,272,183 others

landonorris dropping in with a kiss 💋

tagged: eaphotography

View all 21,612 comments

---

mclaren our driver has never looked better! 🧡

landonorris thanks, mclaren!!! 🧡🧡🧡

user1 OMG I AM SCREAMINGAHEB

user2 HE LOOKS SO FINE OH MY GOSH

user3 WHY DOES HE LOOK SO SEXY ��😻😻

user4 real question tho...who gave him those marks? 🤨🤨🤨

user5 probably the stylist or something

eaphotography nuh uh

user5 HUHH???

eaphotography 🤫🧏‍♀️

user6 HELPPPP

user7 im so jealous of the person that did that 😭😭😭

user8 CHAT I WANT HIM SO BAD

carlossainz55 wow is that why you were busy mate?

landonorris no? 🙄

carlossainz55 elise sent me a photo, are you sure? 😒😒

landonorris SHHHHHH

elise_amor LMFAOOO

ynnn MAN WHAT THE FLIP DELETE IT

elise_amor NEVERRRR. YOU GUYS LOOK TOO CUTE.

user9 photo? 🤨

ynnn NOTHING.

user10 what if this was a soft launch or something 😻😻😻

landonorris yeah..that would be totes..crazy...👀

user10 IT IS?!?&2&:

ynnn LANDO SHUT UP.

user11 GUYS LANDO AND HIS ASSISTANT, Y/N, ARE DATING 😳😳😳

user10 I AGREE W YOU

user12 how??

user11 i saw them kiss last night at this one restaurant

ynnn @/landonorris YOU SAID IT WAS A BLIND SPOT...

landonorris woops...cats out of the bag ig ☺️☺️☺️

user11 OH MY GOSH!/!/&2&:

user10 WHAT THE SIGMA

lerclan HELPPP THE PHOTO IS SO FUNNY

---

ynnn

Liked by elise_amor, landonorris, carlossainz55, and 26,173 others

ynnn bro cannot keep his mouth shut. BRING BACK THE DUCT TAPE.

tagged: landonorris

View all 2 comments

---

landonorris IM SORRY IM JUST HAPPY BABE 😻

ynnn youre lucky youre cute ❤️

Comments on this post have been limited

---

authors note(s): iaheiqhehwjq i hope this was good cuz i absolutely had no plot line 💀

ALSO YOU DK HOW BAD I WAS DYING AT ME EDITING THAT PHOTO OF LANDO I LITERALLY COULD NOT BREATHE 😭😭😭

[seaweedstarshine]

—on the topic of psychotic Summers brothers, I only just caught up with six months of X-Men after stopping for six months the topic of Gabriel referring to the tags of my last X-Men post a month ago — but I was happy to see Scott's torture-induced psychosis didn't (definitively) turn out just to be that he'd calculated what others hadn't. Yes, the woman he'd accurately calculated would save him was Dr. Gregor, not Jean, but that doesn't change that he remained unsure if Jean was real (and thought she was alive) while the all-seeing Enigma knew on the contrary that Scott was delusional because Phoenix thus equally (an equivocation which casts further doubt of Scott's fiery visions ever being genuine, as Jean's dying mind had departed Scott well before Mother Righteous sacrificed Jean's dead fragmented self for Dominion, before Scott was tortured) Jean — were so utterly dead that Rachel and Hope had to cancel out death to reverse it. Yet Scott, hyper-vigilant traumatized autistic brain-damaged neurodivergent soldier that he is, seemingly accomplished all these strategic calculations while having a psychotic “break,” which is extremely in character for him—

[urlocaldesertdweller]

Activities that he loves to do with you! (Stanford x reader) fluff

Both before and after the accident he loves to sketch you in a pile of separate journals

we’ve seen his drawings, he is an observational artist and boy are you his number one muse!

of course he only really does it when he finds you in pose while working or just doing basic things like sitting, eating, or reading.

he loves to think that he’s been really good at keeping his sketch of you a secret but he’s awful at keep secrets with the way you can hear his pen or pencil quickly scratch on the paper with his eyes peeping from above the journal to look at his lovely muse.

he always adds a description or story to your pose to fill in the blank space, but its most of the time compliments and words of admiration towards you his loving partner<3

also makes notes about some of his fantasies with you, ranging from wanting to call you sickeningly sweet nicknames to how much he’ll feel on the brink of insanity with seeing your face and hearing your voice.

ahem, anyway music and slow dancing is something more rare for him to come around with you. Imagine a record playing of one of his favorite songs decades ago and the two of you sway together holding one another in your arms and fingers.

your feet move slowly as you spin around in your sunset lit kitchen, the music swells both of your hearts as Ford stuffs his face between your neck and shoulder enjoying this moment to its very last second.

its one of his, surprisingly bigger ways to relieve stress or tension. god it makes him feel young, you make him feel young.

this is a very intimate moment so please let him come to you and let him take his time, with vinyl records in his arms with his dancing shoes on. (im imaging the end of Steve Rogers/Peggy Carter’s slow dance at the end of End Game, thats you right there with Ford)

watching the stars during warm but cool summer nights is killing two birds with one stone! you sit on the secret balcony on the side of the roof and the two of you just watch the stars and occasional meteor showers.

some times during the summer the weather is perfect enough for you to sleep there in each-others arms all night<3

young or old, Stanford has so much love to give! he can be shy at first of course but all it takes is you to encourage him and prove that he can be quite the charmer himself!!!

@fluffymarshmalllows @valneeds they both are the real miracles, their expectations push and inspire me to write more! so i thank u!!