#but also he is an idiot
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Bruce was being watched. Again.
He didn’t know where it was coming from, and that was a problem at the moment. He was hosting another gala, intent on putting on the “Bruice Wayne” mask for the public. None of his children were attending, unfortunately, but everything was going okay so far.
Then he kept feeling a cool breeze on the back of his neck. His hairs stood on end, and he shivered randomly. Someone mentioned that he looked cold. But Bruce wasn’t cold. He was Batman! Batman is never bothered by something stupid like the temperature. It just felt like there were multiple pairs of eyes staring at him from all directions.
Bruce tried to catch whoever it was, but when he looked, there was no one there. He even made extra laps around the room, easily slipping between socialites and chatting his way through the crowd. He scanned the tables, checked the stairs, peeked outside, and even snuck at glance at the chandeliers for fuck’s sake! There was nothing. No cameras, no lingering eyes, nothing.
Bruce could feel his heartbeat quicken. There was something in the room. Something dangerous.
Eventually, the source of his anxiety came to him. The gala was small, being in the middle of the off-season for social events. It was a relatively quiet gathering. Still, Bruce flinched when someone tapped his shoulder from behind when he was making another waltz around the room. He turned, and was faced with a boy no older than 16, but no younger than 14. It was hard to tell his age. He wore an ill-fitted navy suit and scuffed dress shoes. His tie was no where to be seen, and the boy had a platter of finger foods balanced in one hand. He hadn’t heard anyone approach at all.
What made Bruce freeze, however, was the fact that the boy looked exactly like the portraits of the young Thomas Wayne that were hanging innocently in the Wayne family home. His crystal blue eyes seemed to glow in the overhead lights as they bore into Bruce. It felt like the boy could see his soul. The air was more chilled than it had been all night, and everything in Bruce’s mind was screaming DANGER!
“Y’know…” Bruce’s breath caught in his throat as the boy spoke. His midwestern accent was heavy, and the boy took a slow moment to polish off a baked feta bite before continuing. “You look like the kinda guy to have a secret basement. The bloody kind. Nice party, though!” With that, the boy disappeared back into the crowd, taking the cold air with him.
Bruce never got out a word.
———
Danny sees all the wandering souls and shades attached to Bruce Wayne, and comes to the obvious conclusion that the billionaire is a serial killer.
#pondhead blurbs#no beta we die like danny#danny phantom#dp x dc#danny fenton#Bruce Wayne#bruce is very unsettled by this literal child#who looks like a carbon copy of his father when he was a kid#Bruce is stuck between fight or flight whenever danny is around#which makes him freeze up cause he doesn’t know what to do#he’s afraid of this child#danny thinks bruce wayne is a serial killer#and then he sees the other Waynes and is like#‘oh it’s all of them’#‘well I should probably do something about this’#so he accidentally becomes the newest villain because he’s trying to stop both the Batfam and the Waynes from Situations#he is not aware that Bruce is Batman#they’re both funky and the whole city is messing with his Vibes#he cant catch a break#but also he is an idiot#with no self preservation#like#what’s the etiquette for confronting a serial killer?#compliment his party#obviously#dpxdc
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Bruce used Awkward Flirtation. It's a Critical Hit!
Reference under cut
#dreamer doodles#superbat#bruce wayne#clark kent#dick grayson#I have this dumb headcanon where Clark is so used to Bruce's#Brucie persona that his over the top flirting just doesn't register as sincere to Clark#and when Bruce isn't being an obnoxious flirt he's just incredibly awkward and struggles to express his interest#so Clark still doesn't get it#Idk I'm weak for pining idiots#also look at how pretty I drew Dick! :D
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He keeps doing this I’m gonna cry
#also can I just say this was SO sweet from grian and gems pov#gem saying ‘he’s really pathetic. but he’s a good teammate’#and then skizz and mumbo suggesting they kill joel and gem immediately jumps to his defense and calling him ‘our idiot’#and grian joining as well defending him when skizz and mumbo got mad at Joel constantly killing them#meanwhile Joel - completely unaware this is happening - talks about how he feels the need to protect them while they’re in spectator#IM GONNA CRY. THEY MAKE ME SO SICK#smallishbeans#joel smallishbeans#grian#geminitay#wild life spoilers#wild life#wild life smp#trafficblr
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"just as I did, in 1983."
you'd never know my favourite parts of the show are the fucked up insane bits when my first instinct is to draw the cheesiest thing imaginable
#my art#interview with the vampire#iwtv amc#iwtv#armand iwtv#daniel molloy#armand#armandaniel#devils minion#drew this before the finale but idk maybe this is during the unspecified amount of time between armands divorce and daniels press tour#the titian painting doesnt fit at ALL with the timeline btw#i THOUGHT it did bc i assumed 1508 was when armand was turned into a vampire BUT upon reflection thats more likely the year he was born#and even then the painting was made in like 1510 so fuck me i guess. also im foggy on when armand was taken to rome#idk man i havent read the books and i failed art history on two separate occasions i cannot endeavor for accuracy#anyway as much as i love 70s/80s devils minion i have equal love for old man daniel#his cynicism has been tempered by time... refined like a diamond... he dont gaf and bullies his loser vampire and its hilarious#like ''sure yeah fine all these old italian renaissance guys saw ur ethereal otherworldly beauty but literally anybody can see that''#''IM the only mf who gets to experience the incandescent joy of seeing you be a messy idiot''#sidenote trying to make armand look unflattering is impossible u can blame the show for casting the worlds most beautiful man
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I remember discussing Tintin casting choices with a friend from Germany and remarked how it was odd he often has an English accent in adaptations rather than a Belgian one, and my friend just replied "that's because Tintin gives incredibly strong English boy energy (derogatory)"
Here in the UK there's a lot of weird classism tied into accents. Today accent diversity and representation in broadcasting is actively pursued but in Tintin's time there certainly was a preferred accent to have.
imagine this exchange happens between pages 28-29 in The Crab with the Golden Claws
#tintin#adventures of tintin#comic#captain haddock#archibald haddock#snowy#milou#fanart#the crab with the golden claws#i remember tintin crafting a trumpet to communicate with an elephant#and he remarks he must get the accent correct#very odd scenario but it shows he would be a stickler for that sort of thing#i also have to say accents do not indicate how smart someone is#a lot of pundits use an english accent to sound more credible#but i have to say there are a lot of fucking idiots here#me included#thank you 2011 film for validating my scottish haddock headcanon#any french speakers who have read to this point i wonder what your hcs are for his french speaking accent
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"You and me, Ethan. Together we go save Rose, and then we can grind Miranda into paste!"
#ethan winters#karl heisenberg#wintersberg#resident evil#resident evil fanart#rebhfun#resident evil village#resident evil 8#re8#re8 if karl didnt fumble so hard he literally died#anytime i draw wintersberg know that it is under the assumption that karl did not propose to use rosemary as a weapon#it would be incredibly ooc for ethan to agree to something like that and also increidbly immoral 😭#anyone who blames ethan is nuts#why should it have been on ethan to negotiate with the dude who has done nothing to prove himself as trustworthy#karl literally tries to SCARE ethan into taking his deal#thats like a huge sign that its gonna be a horrible partnership#i love karl#hes a great character#but him thinking that ethan would ever accept his deal was just delusional#anyways#ethan was not stupid or wrong for not taking karls deal#anyone who geniunly believes ethan was a idiot for not taking the deal is forgetting that he is in fact his own character#and would rightfully not want to use his baby under a vague deal that doesnt even elaborate on details#a karl and ethan teamup WOULD be cool#but with the deal karl proposed#it was doomed from the start#*rants about why karl and ethan should never teamed up *#*draws wintersberg*#ok rant over whatever
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do skully have pokemon?
Pumpkaboo is the obvious one, but y'know, sometimes the obvious one is the right one! (we'll say SUPER SIZE Pumpkaboo, just for fun. big pumpkin for big skeleton boy.) and another person actually also suggested Greavard, which I somehow hadn't considered, but feels so perfect that I feel like I should have. dangit.
(they can also have little Nightmare Suit costumes :D)
#art#twisted wonderland#pokemon#poketwst#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(sorry for leaving anon off for a while! i've gotten a rash of spam and i'm gonna wait it out a couple days before turning it back on)#also apologies for the rest of this not really being pokemon related#i don't have anything right now for part 4 of the event so i'm gonna use this space to go off about it#because. oh man.#a sad lack of the scullsman but a FEAST of everyone else#gotta love malleus and leona uniting in the common goal of hunting trey down for trying to game their whiny pettiness#(trey doesn't know what to do with someone he can't easily distract with cake)#also further confirmation that malleus WILL kill a small child and leona WILL point and laugh the whole time#also sebek's plans revolving around what he knows he's good at: screaming extremely loudly and hoisting nerds#and let us not forget what i consider to be the crowning jewel#which is jamil figuring out IMMEDIATELY where scully has taken his prisoners#only for everyone else to just. literally refuse to do anything about it.#jamil just standing there and going 'WE KNOW WHERE THEY ARE! WE CAN JUST! GO GET THEM!!!! WHYYY AREN'T WE GOING'#visibly losing his entire mind and it's beautiful#top 10 twst event moments honestly#also some delightful character consistency from jade being all#'actually my dicking around is a sign of my immense trust in your abilities to get things done :)'#'but also consider: there are currently two housewardens chasing a child'#'alternately angrily screaming poetry and begging them not to sue'#'and if you will pardon my city of flowers...there is no fucking way i'm missing that'#lock shock and barrel did not sign up for this. how did these idiots turn out to be somehow weirder than the three of them.#twisted wonderland must be a frightening place indeed
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DC X DP - Mirrors
Did Danny want to live in Gotham? No, of course not. Did he have a choice? Nope. When does he ever?
Now, he may be technically homeless, but he's also technically dead, so human laws technically don't apply to him. So, naturally, he pics out an empty mansion so big even if the owners were to come home, the chances they'd run into each other would be really low, and settles in.
This 'mansion' happens to be Drake Manor. Look, Danny lived in nowhere Illinois and kinda had his hands full dealing with ghosts, a double life, bullies, and being actively hunted. He doesn’t know much about celebrities. If you tell him the name of someone super famous, it might sound vaguely familiar, but that's about it. What he knew was superheroes and vigilantes (some of them, okay, give him a break). That's about it.
So the name Drake in connection with Gotham didn't ring any alarm bells. He did some surface level research: the Drakes are dead, survived by their only child, Timothy Drake-Wayne, who now owns their house but was adopted by some other super rich guy called Bruce Wayne and doesn't live in it, leaving it empty for the foreseeable future.
It was the perfect place!
Danny didn't explore much, partly because he didn't care to and partly because he was too tired to from healing. He cleaned up after himself, used only his bedroom (chosen for being tucked way back and out of the way), the attached bathroom, and the theatre occasionally as a treat. He lived off of the provisions packed for him, ectoplasm and water from the sink.
Cut to, few weeks in.
Danny's got a new routine, he's taken his stitches out, and is still super fucked up, but a lot better than when he arrived. He hasn't been outside since he arrived, but ghosts don't need Vitamin D anyway. Is he slightly depressed? Maybe. But he's also dead, so, bigger priorities.
Tim is looking through his stuff for something or other, and it occurs to him he probably left it next door. He hasn't been to Drake Manor in months, but he sort of really needs this thing, so he sucks it up and borrows a car because like hell is he walking the several miles from this front door to that one.
He goes to his old bedroom, opens the door, and comes face-to-face with himself.
And Danny doesn't know what he's supposed to do in this situation.
Listen, Danny doesn't always make the best decision in the moment. It's a very normal flaw to have! So he tells who can only be Timothy Drake-Wayne himself when asked, that his name is Timothy Drake, and this is his house, and, actually, who are you and how did you get in?
This causes Tim to assume Danny is himself from another dimension who he accidentally dragged to his dimension by messing with the Time Stream to get Bruce back. Danny continues to accidently fuel this misunderstanding without meaning to.
(This is not helped by the fact that a DNA test doesn't disprove this. Danny's DNA is corrupted, but what Tim does get is identical to himself. This is how Danny finds out he was adopted, and how Tim, much later when misunderstandings are cleared, meets the identical twin brother he never knew he had.)
#dc x dp#dc x dp prompt#tim and danny are twins#neither of them know it#tim thinks danny is himself from a parallel universe#or something along those lines#danny is an idiot#tim is an idiot#but like smart idiots#danny has no idea how the terrible bluff ended up working out but he's glad the cops haven't been called#danny is playing along#tim is a great detective#but clockwork is also a meddling dick#and danny has ridiculous luck#it's either really good or really bad#usually really bad#misunderstandings#danny phantom#danny fenton#dpxdc#tim failing at keeping danny secret from his brothers#bruce being emotionally constipated#probably#i mean that man is not mentally okay
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seb is lucky ominis cant see ref from triptrippy
#seb getting payback/mishebaving when omi berates him bc he cant see what hes doing........hes such a little shit#i also imagine omi smacking him like YES SEBASTIAN! I KNOW WHAT YOURE DOING YOU IDIOT LOL#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#ominis gaunt#clora clemons#choccyart#also reminds me of when i first played HL and ominis catches the MC coming from the undercroft. i was like#i know its not ideal but couldnt mc just shove by him and quickly run away before he realizes who it is LOL#i (and most others) headcanon ominis being super perceptive tho... hed probs be able to tell anyway😩#which is probs why clora is so nervous in this pic LMAO shes like seb... i dont know HOW but i just know.... OMI CAN STILL SEE YOU
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#what a fucking NERD#Also poor aziraphale he just wanted a lil welcome back kiss from his hot goth boyfriend#pair of idiots i tell thee#good omens#gomens#good omens 2#aziraphale x crowley#ineffable husbands#crowley#aziraphale#aziracrow#crowley x aziraphale#my gifs
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The absolute crime that was Jack Harkness being a total enthusiastically knowledgable technology geek being written out of his character for torchwood. You wanna write a sex icon without his most attractive quality?? Come on now. Give the man his passion back.
#this is also boom town posting because he was SO on it with the tech in that episode and he was SO hot for it and it just gives his#character more dimensions you know?? like he was more than just a hot flirt he was a hot flirty geEK and that should be respected#obviously he’s not written as a clueless idiot in torchwood either but he definitely loses any evidence of his personal hobby and interest#I guess he moves from the tech support and hired muscle to the immortal team leader which is quite a step#torchwood#captain jack harkness#doctor who
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[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]
Hitting a lil' too close to home?
#junie art post#ink sans#error sans#utmv#errorink#implied. but yea not the focus#this has been turning around in my mind for quite some time. im glad to finish it lmao idk if my ramblings make sense even.#so like listen. do you ever think about how similar the function of the utmv is to the dark worlds in deltarune.#in a meta narrative to fandom sense? idk the word#we are making exaggerated expanded worlds of the ordinary tools and entertainment of the real world and make it into something more#isnt that very very interesting?#and we explore every sort of possibility in that creation. both good and bad#and when all is said and done. every possibility found and the entertainment and secrets has all run out#we put it away. abandon and leave it behind#what is left? what happens to the world and characters we have created? can it sustain without us?#what of the ones left in the dark?#idk if yall saw me a few months ago but i reblogged comyet's old post of ink begging us not to leave him alone and to keep creating#yea that never left me#and seeing exactly THAT SCENARIO in deltarune made my brain iTCH#imagine an ink in King's position.... wait isnt that just underverse#mmmmmmm. darkner ink.....#also error is here too. not just for errorink or that i can't separate these two to save my life#but error is also one of the few people to be able to GET IT?? he can hear the creators too. ink cant#but hes pretty much programmed himself to avoid having a mental break down to this via reboot memory loss.#and ink has his own internal coping mechanism (hooray for short term memory loss)#these two idiots will do anything but confront truths lmfao#ahhh my favorite idiots. never change#mmmmm#deltarune
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Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.
But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.
But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.
It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'
#o.#trans#transphobia#transmisogyny#I may or may not be talking about a specific post I saw that made me irritated but I didnt wanna get in an argument with internet strangers#sorry guys I'm still heated over freaking collin allred capitulating to ted cruz and throwing trans girls under the bus bc he didnt have the#guts to stick to his morals#and called them ''this idiotic business with boys in girls sports'' or some crap#as if trans girls don't deserve to play the sports they love. like I imagine if they blocked trans men from being physicists or something#and I just wasn't able to pursue the career I want? that would destroy me#and I still had to vote for him because the other options were ted cruz and some freaking libertarian.#sorry thats all tangential but can we not use the same rhetoric that all these politicians do as an excuse to kick trans women out of public#life PLEASE 🙏#...also I really hate the Popular Transmasc Ideology that says that we all experience life as basically the same as a cis woman & never have#to navigate having male privilege & being an ally to women#and all have some sort of Innate Connection to femaleness or womanhood or whatever bc 'obviously' we all grew up just like girls do#ugh#this one's going out there sans editing so dont yell at me if I worded smth weird please 🙏
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I wonder if any of them knew it was all for her.
#he doesn't want to be holding the Hand pin he wants to be holding HER#oh god am i about to become a corlys account? like rhaenys first and foremost but damn it if this man hasn't wormed his way into my heart#as much as i do agree he is an IDIOT#he's also ripping my guts out and i feel sorry for the man#like he's not THAT bad (on a westeros scale)#just let the man GRIEVE#(but also at the same time - corlys - pull yourself together)#i am so down bad for this line of baela to now guide corlys into this new phase#rhaenys is going to HAUNT this guy <3#steve toussaint#corlys velaryon#house of the dragon#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon spoilers#rhaenys targaryen#rhaenys x corlys#eve best
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Just thinking about s4 but when Alpha!Eddie grabs Steve to shove the bottle against his neck, he doesn't realize Steve is an omega and accidentally scruffs him. And Steve is just boneless, kinda goes down. And Eddie isn't expecting deadweight and almost falls ontop of Steve but realizes what's happening (let's just say he's fought off a few bullies who scruffed members of his pack). He immediately drops the bottle and holds onto Steve, who tries to scent Eddie. Just shoves his face into Eddie's neck and nuzzles it, lets out a purr unintentionally.
#Obviously from then on it would be different because Eddie's inner alpha would be like I GOTTA PROTECT THIS SELFSACRIFICING IDIOT#And Steve is just like wow Eddie can manhandle him?? He's so strong!! Eddie stole a van??? He's such a provider!!#Steve still has the 6 nuggets convo with Nancy and Eddie overhears still and is like trying to calculate how many names he can come up with#Eddie throwing his vest so Steve will be covered in his scent cause Nancy is also an alpha and no thank you look at ME Steve#Steve has those cartoon hearts floating around his head and is batting his eyes watching Eddie mess around with Dustin#Oh I could go on#When Steve gets scruffed and starts purring Robin is just standing there like 🧍♀��#Robin turns every once in awhile while the two are flirting and looks at an imaginary camera with a ARE YOU SEEING THIS look#Anyways when Vecna gets defeated and torn to smithereens and the upside down starts to close permanently#And Eddie recovers in the hospital (still got hurt) Steve is very territorial and sits by his side the entire time#Wayne walks in and pulls a Robin just goes 🧍♀️ and walks back out for a moment#Wayne is like who is the omega (as if he doesn't know he just wants to see Eddie's response and make him sweat)#And Steve is all indignant like I am your future son in law the future mother of your grandkids#And Eddie is blushing and twirling his hair and biting his lip he's 3 seconds away from asking to bite his mating gland#Oh I could still go on but...I shant...(I will later)#Steddie#Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson#Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson#omega!steve harrington#alpha!eddie munson#eddie munson/steve harrington#eddie munson x steve harrington#Omegaverse#Jade is talking
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Imagine, if you will, Respawn ending up in the least important town in all of Illinois hoping to lay low for a while whilst planning to completely wreck Damian’s shit only to get shot at by some rogue government agents, kill said government agents, accidentally out some meta kid to the entire town while he tries to keep him from killing more government agents (who have not stopped shooting at either of them), save him by coincidence while making his escape, and having to flee the state with said weird metahuman kid (he’s like the third person to ever treat him like an actual human so he decided not to leave him behind) on the world’s third-worst roadtrip in order to rock up to Batman’s actual house to convince him to clear their names and get rid of the anti-ecto acts, with his only point of bartering being him pinky promising that he’ll definitely stop trying to kill Damian this time
And all of this happens over the course of like three days
#spook speaks#dcxdp#dpxdc#dcxdp prompt#dcxdp crossover#basically respawn having like. the second-worst week of his life#and danny only getting to live because he treated him with basic human decency#bruce opening the door to respawn and some scrawny teen he’s become incredibly codependent with and running with the assumption that he’s#known him for years only to find out that they’ve gotten like this in under 72 hours. diabolical#damian wants to beat respawn’s ass SO bad but everyone’s pitying him and happy that he’s defending a civilian(?) instead of being evil#and he KNOWS that respawn also wants to fight to the death but he won’t SAY it because he’s not an idiot and is fully taking advantage of#the situation#danny is just in the background eating B’s rich people food and vibing
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