#but I only have 1 new years resolution
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Since my mental health has been getting so much better lately, I'm honestly super excited for 2024. I'm not gonna prematurely say "2024 is my year" but I'm definitely excited to see where I'm going from here, since it definitely seems like there's nowhere to go but up.
#simon says#I'm absolutely being a little chattier here but i dont care#just giving a general update#turns out your mental health improves when you quit an addiction and focus on your mental health#and it also turns out that your mental health improves when you take the time to be kind to yourself and learn new things#anyways i really hope I can get some work done on my creative projects this year#but I only have 1 new years resolution#soup quest#it's where I try a bunch of new soups I never had before#try some new stuff and get out of my comfort zone... but like with soup#microdosing leaving the comfort zone via soup quest so I can get that practice in with more important learning moments#but yeah there's the update#im probably gonna post on patreon soon#but for now im just gonna listen to music and chill#good night tumblrinas
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I love and hate getting hit with big project ideas (both of the writing and art variety)
love it bc they seem so fun!! i would like to do them for various reasons! i know finishing would leave me feeling accomplished, id learn some new stuff and practice some skills
hate it cause i have no time to finish and i eventually lose motivation to keep up
#like. id love to start a project kinda like justin veneema(?)'s photography project on insta#but with doing strangers' portraits for free and in a variety of styles#would love to do self portraits and do some hand portraits especially of fingerspelled words/names#would love to do stippling and combine stippling and digital art!#id love to write more of eternal. remaster my old nnt soulmate/soul bond series#write more of notw! get further in the story or write some other starting points#and i want big game projects! wanna collect every item in sdv. fill the botw compendium. restart smash bros and collect all the characters#but timeeeeeeeeeee#i have so much school work. im actually pretty behind in *all* my classes. i still have a couple months left. i need to get my gpa up#i work part time over weekends. in the mornings. im exhausted by noon & my legs are tired and its hot and deli employees can be so annoying#i have an internship. weekly 1 on 1s on zoom that i gotta rush to cause theyre right after my class. only JUST NOW getting#placed at sites and my contract expires in december. takes up middle of two days at least each week#by the time i do get a chance to do whatever i want im tired or have a headache or my brain is fried so i do nothing#this became more venty than i expected but gist is im scrambing#and my early new years resolution (aka starting in mid december) is to manage my time better. and plan time explicitly for myself#amber's shit you can ignore
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scheduled an appointment with my advisor AND signed up for an extra class to get support on my CS classes basically i WILL survive this next quarter even if it kills me!!!!!!!
#new years resolutions: 1. learn to juggle 2. take back control of my academics YIPPEE#and 3. work out more or whatever ig#ALSO 4. STOP SAYING IT COULD BE WORSE!!! literally have had the worst luck lately and it only continues bc i almost got in a car accident#because my car (that i love so much and just got back today) couldn't get enough traction and wouldnt go when I turned onto a busy road#and 5. read more books or whatever#ok. hockey is back tomorrow i will be SO normal once again#also i got a new nail polish so i am a lilac guy just like auston this is so epic#ALSO!!! i got roller blades AND ice skates for christmas!!! literally so excited i keep putting the roller blades on around the house#and i want to wear them outside SO BAD but its raining :( and dark :(((#hope yall have had a nice week <3#heckin rants
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going to explode forever
#i’m still cleaning my room right and i have my shitty old laptop that i bought ~4.5 years ago that got me through college and everything#and it was sooo good i loved her so much !! i still have to use it for editing my amvs too bc the screen resolution is just so much better#than the new computer i bought last may. anyway but i have to connect a keyboard to it and keep it plugged in 24/7 bc it immediately dies#otherwise and certain keys don’t work. like when i say it’s on its last legs i mean it#and it’s crashing more and more lately so i’m too scared to edit anything bc i don’t have anything backed up !!!!!!#but ANYWAY it’s ridiculous to have to have 2 laptops one for editing amvs and one for all my other stuff like browsing and school etc#like that’s taking up so much space it’s such a hassle etc but the laptop i would really need is . $1500 😮💨🤢#and even if i sold my new-used 1 year old laptop it would only go for like. $500-$600 max and i can’t afford $1100 💀 but also i DO have loan#money from school and it WOULD be a big investment but !!! i grew up poor!!!!!! i live in constant fear of big purchases !!!!#but i also know!!! that this big purchase would meet all my needs and last for years!!! anyway. okay i’m done ranting i tired myself out#if ur reading this hi kiss 😘
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I love when Amazon plays itself. It’s genuinely so funny
#so i have this new year’s resolution for 2023 that i’m not buying new books unless i’ve read something from the author before & loved it#and even then i’m going to check the library + any book swaps in my town just to see if i can obtain a copy more sustainably#but there’s a caveat to this. i live in a small town so if i walk into my library there’s a pretty slim chance i’m going to find#the exact book i want. ditto book swaps. tbh the book swaps are a total potluck. sometimes there are gems; sometimes it’s just gardening#and animal husbandry and outdated maps. which is fine if you like that sort of thing but it’s probably not what i’m after#so what i generally do is i place a reservation for a book at the library. i live in the largest (by area anyway) county in england#so there’s a decent chance i’m getting my book eventually. this is good! the only thing is that there’s a £1 charge for requesting a book#i don’t begrudge this because you can sort of pay it whenever. your account won’t lock you out of borrowing unless you have#something like £20 in fines. i always thought it was £10 but then my friend managed to borrow several books for her kiddo despite owing £18#so i think it must be £20+. anyway. so requests cost £1#so i have an exception on my resolution. if the book costs equal to or less than £1; i can buy it instead of getting it from the library#this is where amazon comes in. they were offering the first witcher book for £0.99 a few days ago#i already had a reservation though so i dithered for a day or so and then was like ‘i would kind of like to own it just so i can read it at#my own pace & not be pretty much forced to read it as soon as the library gives it to me’#so i went back to amazon and how much is it now? £4.99#congrats jeff you played yourself. you could’ve had 99p but instead i’m paying the library#tbh i might just make it a rule to pay the library anyway? i’d rather give the library my money than jeff#i just found it funny how they unknowingly lost out on a sale like that. evil corporation gets defeated by small town library#personal
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I completely forgot about the summary of art and I'm not gonna get a chance to do it today, but I'll try and have it posted tomorrow !
#my posts#i did art during every month at least once so yay#its kinda funny bc u can actually tell when im busy based on how much art i post#like i only posted 1 thing in march#which was bc i had a job but after i got let go in april i posted a lot#same w school i did 1 drawing in November that i posted AMD IT WAS SMTH FOR AN ASSIGNMENT#im gonna try and balance this stuff better bc i have some new ocs i wanna draw more#the thing is is that its not even that im too busy its just that school satisfies the side of me that needs to create#but one of my new years resolutions is to draw more and draw consistently#im gonna try for a post for every week
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Thawing Out
collab with @ellecdc
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12
cw: modern au, chronic pain, some talk of traumatic injury
poly!wolfstar x fem!reader ♡ 2.2k words
At five thirty in the morning, you send Sirius a text.
Be on time, and there’s a caramel latte in your future. If you’re late I’m giving it to Marcello.
Marcello is the guy who comes in early every morning to resurface the ice. You actually ordered a drink for him, too, but Sirius doesn’t need to know that.
The morning air is cool and refreshing, sweeping across your cheeks in the self-made breeze of your brisk steps. You can only have one hand in your pocket with the other holding the drink carrier, but you don’t mind the bite of cold on your fingers. You’ve always loved the sharp, clean feel of winter weather. Though Sirius complains this time of year about leaving practice just to encounter yet more cold outside, the chilly air has always made you feel alive, invigorated. It wakes you up as you walk to the rink.
Marcello leaves the staff door open for you every morning so that you can practice early. He’s still out on the Zamboni, so you leave his drink on the front desk where he’ll see it. You know you’re not the first person to the rink, but it surprises you that you’re not the second.
It surprises you even more to find your new coach in the off-ice room.
Remus is lying on the floor, one knee bent and the other ankle crossed over it in a stretch you recognize. His eyes are closed and his expression pinched. His chest rises and falls with deep, measured breaths.
“Hi.”
You try to announce your presence softly, but Remus' eyes fly open like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t be. You find yourself taking a step back as though to avoid frightening him.
“Sorry,” you say automatically, and automatically, Sirius’ For what, doll? sounds in your head like an overplayed song. You set your shoulders back and walk over to Remus, crouching to set his drink beside him on the floor. You’ve wagered your bets on a plain tea; he seems like the no-nonsense sort. “I didn’t expect anyone else here this early, but this is for you.”
“Thanks.” Remus grunts quietly as he sits up, and you pretend you don’t hear. He takes a tentative sip from his cup. You deduce that you’ve wagered correctly when his eyes close blissfully. “I can go if you want the room to stretch.”
“That’s alright. Plenty of room for both of us,” you say awkwardly.
But as soon as you set your foot up on the ballet bar, you second-guess yourself. Is it difficult for him, watching you do things he can no longer do himself? You knew about Remus’ injury—everyone does—but seeing his face creased in pain doing such a simple stretch is another thing entirely.
You watch him covertly as you bend over your leg, feeling the pleasant strain in your muscles, but Remus’ expression doesn’t change. He only stands, taking his ankle in one hand and wrapping the other around the bar as he stretches his quads.
Remus has long fingers, you’ve noticed. Pianist’s fingers. They make you think of every routine of his you’ve seen a million times, arms and hands always outstretched to emphasize the facile grace of his movements. He was art in motion, in his day. Now you’re not sure what he is. Still lovely, but something else.
“I wanted to apologize.”
Remus’ voice breaks into your reverie so gently that at first you think you’ve imagined it. You look up at him, bemused, and his gaze is steady on yours. It’s that skater’s poise. Quiet, resolute.
“I didn’t mean to shout at you yesterday,” he says. “I was frustrated because I feel like you really could get past that jump with just a tiny adjustment—” his face tenses as some of that frustration seeps back into his voice now, but Remus quells it “—but I shouldn’t have raised my voice. Sirius was right, I wasn’t telling you in a way that was helpful.”
“It’s okay.” Your voice comes out smaller than you mean for it to, but the air in the room feels thick and awkward. You’re not used to needing to have these conversations with people on your team. You, Sirius, and your coach used to be a unit. There was no need for shouting matches and make-ups. You had years of history together; you knew how to handle each other. You miss that ease terribly now.
“What I should have said,” Remus goes on, “is that I’ve noticed you hesitating before a lot of higher difficulty jumps. You’ll be about to go into it, and then you second-guess yourself and under-rotate. That doesn’t work on the ice.”
You drop your gaze, nodding. “I know,” you say as you swap legs on the bar. “I’ll try to stop.”
“We’ll work on it.” Remus’ voice softens, and you glance up to find a sheepish sort of kindness in his eyes. One corner of his mouth lifts tentatively. “And I’ll work on giving better feedback the first time around.”
You return his smile, a heavy load in your chest lifting just slightly. It feels like the return of your cautious optimism from before yesterday’s practice, like flirting with the possibility of everything being all right after all. Maybe you can salvage the season after all.
Sirius practically stomps into the room, dark circles under both eyes and looking like he hates the world and everyone in it. Remus’ almost-smile evaporates.
“Here you are.” You pass Sirius his coffee magnanimously. “Thank you for being on time.”
He takes a long sip. Once he’s finished, he says gravely, “This can’t continue.”
“You’ll get used to it,” you promise as Remus lets his foot drop and steps away from the bar to make room for Sirius.
“Ten minutes of stretching,” your coach says gruffly. You feel your lips purse dissatisfiedly; you take this to mean that although he’s apologized to you, he’s not over his tiff with Sirius from the day before. Remus turns from the room. “I’ll see you out there.”
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
You manage to get through practice without bloodshed. Remus is short and businesslike, but while his pointers don’t leave much room for conversation he does take the time to make sure you understand him and he praises you when you improve. Sirius doesn’t spare many words for your new coach, though you know him saying little is likely an improvement over what he’d have to say if he did speak up. Still, he’s not exactly thorough in making sure Remus doesn’t see the smirks and derisive looks he sends your way every time your coach’s voice reaches you across the ice. The other boy pretends not to notice.
It doesn’t escape you either that Remus has far less critiques for Sirius than for you. Sirius is more likely to get ahead of himself so that he falls out of sync with you, whereas you’re more likely to fall in general.
You didn’t used to be like this. Just a handful of weeks ago you and Sirius were an equal match, but recent events have planted an anxiety in you that makes you bail out of your risker jumps and sabotages your routine. Remus is right; you’re hesitant. Sirius throws himself into every move, full-bodied and artful, but you just can’t do the same. Until you can catch up and get back to where you were, you’re a liability.
You land most of your jumps, fall on more than usual, and by the time practice wraps up you know you’ll be bruised all over. If Remus is frustrated with you again, he’s better at hiding it. He only instructs you to work on whatever mental block is hindering you, promises to see you both tomorrow, and goes.
Then Sirius can’t contain himself any longer.
“God, what a prick,” he fumes as he puts guards on his skates. He starts undoing his laces, nails cut short for the season but still painted a shimmery black. “I hate that stupid line he gets between his eyebrows right before he lays into us. He’s like a sixty-year-old schoolteacher stuck in a twenty-something body.”
You look down to hide a smile. “He was nicer today, though. That’s something.”
Sirius scoffs. “Yeah, so was I. Did you lay into him, too?”
“Didn’t have to,” you say complacently. “He apologized himself. You know, like adults do.”
“Don’t be daft. He’s not taking the high road, he just doesn’t want to lose his job.”
You turn to give Sirius an exasperated look, only he’s looking back at you with a similar expression.
You know Sirius thinks you’re being too trusting of your new coach. He only wants to protect you, both of you, but something he’s never been able to grasp is that optimism doesn’t have to be blind. You can be wary of Remus, can have that same desire to protect the team you and Sirius have built together, and at the same time be hopeful that he really will be the thing you need. You’re desperate to make this work for the both of you. You’re a pair in repair, and though it was your former coach that broke you, if there’s a chance that Remus could fix things you’re ready to welcome him with open arms.
Peter was Sirius’ friend before he was yours. He fell into coaching you both almost by accident, it felt so natural. Both you and Sirius had coaches throughout your childhoods, but it was nice to have someone around your own age, who viewed skating through the same lens as you did and could talk to you on a more personal level. Peter was your friend in a way your other coaches hadn’t been. That made his betrayal sting all the worse.
There had been a hearing, when Peter’s texts came out. The International Skating Union had gotten involved. He’d been sharing things—tips, secrets, videos of your entire routine from start to finish—with another team. It felt odd, reading about it in the news. Almost invasive. It felt like something you should be discussing back at Sirius’, the three of you sat in your usual places around his living room, hashing it out the way you always did. But you weren’t a unit anymore.
Sirius didn’t want another coach at all after that. You could keep each other in check, he said, and realistically anyone you hired would know all about your recent disaster with Peter. Your names were attached to one of the largest figure skating scandals the community had had in years. You saw the logic in your partner’s reluctance, but you still thought you needed an outside perspective to tell you when you both were going wrong. You needed a real coach. Then, you’d thought of Remus.
You wish you could say it was Remus’ illustrious figure skating career that drew you to him. He was the golden boy of the sport for nearly a decade, shooting up into stardom at an unprecedented age. He earned enough medals to likely break whatever shelf his family tried to put them on, and he took home gold for Britain at just seventeen. But truthfully, it was his isolation that appealed to you.
Remus Lupin left the figure skating community entirely after his injury. He’d returned to his hometown in Wales, reportedly to be with his family but more likely to heal—physically and mentally, from the hip dislocation that cost him Worlds and then the rest of his career. By all accounts, he would have been the last person to follow your hearing or any of the ensuing gossip everyone else you spoke to seemed to take as gospel. You had to fight tooth and nail to get Sirius to let you hire Remus, and even still he’s resistant to the addition to your team. But it’s in Sirius’ nature to expect people to hurt him; you have to be the opposite to compensate.
“He said you were right,” you say lightly.
Sirius blinks. “Pardon?”
You shrug, feigning insouciance. “I don’t think it’s likely he’ll ever say it to your face, but this morning Remus told me that you were right, and he does need to communicate his feedback better. He seemed better about it today, right? I think it’s sweet that he’s trying.”
Sirius scowls, standing while you finish packing up. “He’s kissing your ass because he knows you were the one who wanted him. He doesn’t give a shit about us.”
“I didn’t mention anything,” you reply. “And he may not, but he definitely gives a shit about skating. I walked in on him stretching in the off-ice room this morning. It was…sad.” A small part of you feels wrong for sharing this, even with Sirius; it felt like a private moment you’d intruded on, although Remus had been stretching in a public place. “You can tell he really misses it, you know?”
Sirius is quiet for a beat, and when you look over he’s sucking his teeth. Peering at you in that way of his, like he’s got you all figured out.
“You should have a heart-to-heart with him about it,” he says blankly. “He seems like the sort of bloke who really enjoys a pity party.”
“Prick.” You stand, bumping your shoulder into his roughly. Sirius wraps an arm around them to bind you to his side, walking you towards the exit. “We’re stopping for donuts on our way home. You owe me after I bought your coffee.”
“Oi, bribery’s no good if I have to pay it back. And what would your new favorite coach say about us eating those during the season?”
“The same as any coach; nothing, because we’re not gonna tell him.”
#poly!wolfstar olympic au#poly!wolfstar#poly!wolfstar x reader#poly!wolfstar x fem!reader#poly!wolfstar x y/n#poly!wolfstar x you#poly!wolfstar x self insert#poly!wolfstar fanfiction#poly!wolfstar fanfic#poly!wolfstar fic#poly!wolfstar series#poly!wolfstar enemies to lovers#poly!wolfstar angst#poly!wolfstar fluff#poly!wolfstar imagine#poly!wolfstar scenario#poly!wolfstar drabble#poly!wolfstar blurb#poly!wolfstar oneshot#poly!wolfstar one shot#remus lupin x sirius black#remus lupin x sirius black x reader#wolfstar x reader#sirius black#remus lupin#figure skater!sirius#figure skater!reader#coach!remus#sirius black x reader#remus lupin x reader
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I want to speak about why the second part of the Best-True ending of Dragon Age Veilguard pierced me so deeply. The Flycam screenshots are from Aru/Elf botanist (YT linked at the bottom).
To set the tone, the music established the emotive themes of the scene. It speaks to the Lost Elf theme- however it is forever changed and lighter. This elf that was Lost for so many years is now Found. There is hope in the strings, there is redemption in each note. This also speaks to the specific codex from the lighthouse in Solas’ secret room. Not his office at the top of the building, extravagant, beautiful, overshadowing all others and looking down in godly benevolence - his private quarters on the main floor, where parts of his travel with the Inquisition surround him.
When Lavellan speaks to Solas, she is using a resolute voice, almost chastising him for thinking he has to do this alone. He has her, and she will keep reminding him.
Solas implores her to think of the dangers the journey he is going on will have, his head is down to show the residual shame and his plea for her safety. But also a part of him hopes. The reason all he says is that “there will be danger” is a statement of warning but not fully imploring her to stay. His heart has a pause, he is prioritising her safety and wants her aware of the dangers.
This is the shot normally, the downward and side tilt are clear making the imploring effect of his words resonate further. Unlike before where he only looked at her for small spans of time his attention is fully focused since being absolved of his duty. After she responds that she will be with him, forever no matter what, he shifts. This is akin to when making vows “I stay with you in sickness and in death” but they are crossing the boundaries of mortality. This is “I stay with you in any plight, any condition, any reality. I commit my eternity to you”
Her response is an amalgamation of the following:
1) You are not alone in it emotionally and mentally as I am with you
2) Physically I am with you to endure it with you
3) Our joined manifestations will make it a better place quite literally, so the bleak darkness that could have encroached will not exist when we are together
This is also validated a bit by Trick Weekes QA:
She then states their love is eternal, and she chooses to walk on any path with him fully and wholly. A love that transcends time, mortal barriers, immortality, the different realms of existence. This combined with their standing pose as if at the altar of a wedding is the final part of her vows. Said in the same hallelujah pattern and in elven as he would speak - she commits to his language (mentally and emotionally) so he best will understand her declaration. (This is confirmed by @northgalis on Twitter).
This, in front of the witnesses who are the allies who helped them unite in their union, Rook and Morrigan whilst overseen by the Veil itself in the position of holiness. His blood is the bond they now share, the new blood magic in a way that ties them to a new fate of their own making. The veil that brought them together in the beginning of the journey they now tread into together.
Then they confirm their vows with a kiss, she pulls him in first, similarly to their first kiss in the fade and he reciprocates. Solas is weakened, hurting, feeling unworthy of the brightest soul in the universe but she chooses him and he finally submits to his desire and need for her. His duty now to himself, atonement and the woman who chose him with it all in mind.
Aru’s flycam footage also shows the kiss being deeper and him actively
After the kiss, he SMILES. The ending is now so much less bleak it is tender, it is soft it is comfort, it is peace.
A smiling glance. meeting at a crescendo; a shared moment of understanding;
Screenshot from Daoithe on Tumblr.
He then proceeds to thank Rook, for helping him see when he allowed himself to be so plagued by grief and guilt and not giving up on him as it could have turned to despair, revenge and anger, like all the other endings which I hate because they go against his very nature. The other endings spit in the face of his complexity the story keeps explicitly imploring you to see and have empathy. Solas is a spirit of wisdom, when guilt festers that wisdom manifests in the worst possible ways. And with no one to listen and read between the lines, the fate he is subjected too is far too unkind. But here, he not only is freed of his guilt but also, just as importantly and very implicitly, his fear of dying alone.
If you have played inquisition you will recall there is a moment near the climax of Here Lies the Abyss where Inquisitor and their chosen companions go into the Fade. Solas is easily one of the most fascinating and best companions to take with you as he from the onset has been a “Fade expert” and his lines throughout are intriguing and educational. During the quest you come across graves embodying the different characters biggest fears. And Solas? Dying alone. The god who went against everyone he knew for a better world, whose empathy only continued to hurt him and freed others with hopes to better the world is the most lonely man. And he is terrified and within himself brought low by his loneliness in his commitment to the path he feels he must take. This is why the next part transcends the scene.
After the kiss which confirmed their bond and pact - binding them together with love and empathy, wisdom and curiosity married - he thanks rook and looks back at Lavellan, his Vhenan. And it is a *micro second* shot that completely defeats me. His head held high, the concerned imploring tilt gone as he holds his chin higher in appreciation, respect and awe for the woman who chose him. The love of his life, his eternal companion. The only one to truly fully see him, respect him, and love him wholly. Who has forgiven him and chooses a path which only leads to him. He is honoured to be loved by her, and will work to be the better man he feels she deserves, but also beginning to accept that her love for him is in any form he takes. The one he prizes above all others, chose him, and he will never be alone - and that is everything.
Seeing completely, and being wholly seen.
This scene literally destroyed me in the best way. I am left hollow with love and adoration for this character and his relationship to his love Lavellan and no other romance will meet the threshold they have created for me. It is not Solavellan hell no longer, they have transcended to Solavellan heaven.
My playthrough video of the second half of the ending sequence.
Here is Arus Flycam YT video for reference:
Arus Flycam Lavellan POV of the True - Best ending
youtube
#Youtube#Solas#Solavellan#dragon age solas#solas dragon age#solas dread wolf#solas x inquisitor#lavellan#solas x female lavellan#Solavellan heaven
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✍️Introduction and Masterlist✍️
About me: Hi! I'm Kacie, I'm 21, and I use she/her/any pronouns. I'm from the UK but I'm currently an English Teacher in South Korea (if you want to know more I'm totally open to conversations about it!) and this is my side blog, so I follow and respond to comments from @studykac
Writing: At this point in time. I only write for Spencer Reid. I will pass on any requests that focus on other characters because I don't currently write for them. A lot of my work is also NSFW. If you are under the age of 18, do NOT interact with any of my posts that are tagged #maturereiding - please block this tag!! When my requests are open you can request through the Ask box, or through DMs, but please keep in mind I do have a full time job, so I will do my best to get things out quickly. You can find my recommendations in the tag #reiderrecommends!
Other interests: kpop, especially Seventeen, SHINee, NCT and BTS, Criminal Minds (obv), NCIS, reading any genre of books (here's a link for my GoodReads page), Percy Jackson, languages (learning Korean currently!), English Literature, Jane Austen etc.
Requests are: CLOSED - find my request guidelines here!
Writing:
Spencer Reid x Reader NSFW
Everyone Looks Better in a Sundress // 3.8k
Summary: The AC at the BAU decides to take a holiday during a summer heatwave, and when you decide the FBI’s dress code is merely a suggestion, you unwittingly catch Spencer’s eye.
Warnings: Dom!Spencer, sub!reader, semi-public sex, fingering, car sex, degradation, name-calling, edging, praise-kink, dumbification
Everyone Looks Better in a Sundress pt. 2 // 2.4K
Summary: After a hot encounter in your car, Spencer pulls you inside your apartment hoping to give you some more relief from the heat.
Warnings: Dom!Spencer, sub!Reader, soft Dom, oral (M receiving), pet names, degradation, face fucking, messy sex, creampie, breeding kink
Margaritas and Mistakes // Part 1 // Part 2
Summary: On a group night out, you get a little more drunk than you want to, and when Spencer shows up looking like the love of your life and not just your coworker, you realise that the margarita’s are having more of an effect than they should be.
Warnings: Suggestive language, dirty talk, heavy petting, hickeys, making out, mentions of arousal etc. (part one)
Show You What Devotion Is ❤️🔥
Summary: After a lustful encounter on the jet, you and Spencer decide to try out a friends-with-benefits relationship. What you didn't expect was for his sex drive to be so high, and your need for him to overpower your ability to function properly.
Warnings: So many, check the post for details.
More Than Words 🫶 // 8k
Summary: After telling a white lie to your family about your relationship status, you're forced to ask your coworker Spencer to pretend to be your boyfriend for a weekend wedding.
Warnings: Mostly fluff, penetrative sex, creampie, mentions of Spencer's childhood.
The Us That Could've Been 💔 // 5.7k
Summary: They say to get over a man, you have to get under another. Spencer isn't sure why the idea of you doing just that makes him feel so bad.
Warnings: angst, unprotected sex, creampie, spoilers for season 8, mentions of Maeve, Spencer is emotionally illiterate etc.
Unhappy Holidays 👻🦃🎄🎆// 5k
Summary: You're unlucky enough to run into Spencer Reid at holiday celebrations four years in a row. In the New Year, you're resolving to rid him from your mind forever, but you never were one to stick to resolutions 👻🦃🎄🎆
Warnings: Enemies to lovers, low-key work rivals, semi-public sex, car sex, hate sex, fingering, thigh riding, creampie, unprotected sex (no condoms but contraceptive mentioned), slight spoilers for s4 of Criminal Minds (but not really).
Flirting with the FBI // 7.1k
Summary: To catch a killer, you have to first out him on the FBI's radar. By hacking their systems and flirting with Spencer Reid, of course.
Warnings: Rough sex, Dom Spencer, bimbofication, dacryphilia, unprotected sex, creampie, fingering, use of slut and good girl, more in the fic warnings.
Spencer Reid x Reader SFW
The Lightbulb Moment // 4.8k
Summary: You want Spencer all to yourself for the first few months of your relationship and he's only too happy to comply. Unfortunately, you're two dumbasses who can't keep their hands off one another.
Just Hanging Out // 3k
Summary: To kick off your vacation, you find yourself at Rossi's mansion with your team for a big summer barbeque. A hammock in the garden catches your eye, and you enlist Reid to help you have some fun in the sun.
(Not smut but highly suggestive, read at your own discretion).
Isn't She Pretty, Daddy? // 2k
Summary: You're a teacher, and you have to call in one of your students' parents to talk about their recent troubling behaviour. It's more embarrassing than you thought when Spencer Reid shows up.
Series
That's What You Get // complete 💕
Summary: After three weeks on a case in Vegas and a particularly draining phone call from your mother, you decide to take Reid up on his offer to show you the sights of Las Vegas. When you wake up the next morning, you realise that one of the sights was a 24hour Wedding Parlor, and that you're now Mrs Reid.
Genres: Fluff, smut in later chapters, angst in later chapters, happy ending.
Playlist: Me and You in 2024
Summary: One song fic a week throughout 2024!
Genres: Various, check individual chapters for specific warnings!♡
Answered Requests
(NSFW) Request inspired by Taylor Swift's False God 🙏// 2.2k
(NSFW) Request for a soft!Dom Spencer with cockwarming and breeding kink 💕 // 2k words
(NSFW) Request for Reader introducing vanilla!Spencer to a BDSM lifestyle ✨// 0.7k words
(SFW) Request for Reader kidnapped by unsub and saved by Spencer 💕 // 2.2k
(SFW) Request for pregnant Reader and Spencer who is an absolute fool for her 🌸 // 1.2k
(SFW) Request for shamelessly flirting with an oblivious Spencer 😊// 2k
(NSFW) Request for post-Maeve Spencer who uses sex as a coping mechanism 🫡//4.6k
(NSFW) Request for alt!sub!Reader meeting the team for the first time (and they totally think she's the Dom) 🤭// 1.5k
(NSFW) Request for CNC office sex with Spencer 🚫// 1k
(SFW) Request for Spencer finding out you knew Emily was alive 😿// 0.7k
(SFW) Request for training session with Spencer 🤼♀️// 1.8k
(SFW) Request for I Can See You inspired angst 🥺// 1.7k
(NSFW) Request for Spencer making the reader beg for it ❤️🔥// 1.6k
(NSFW) Request for CNC with soft!Dom Spencer - shower sex 💦// 1.3k
(NSFW) PROMPT REQUEST - Professor Reid doesn't know he's distracting the class 👓// 3k
(NSFW) Request for Sub!Spencer begging reader to dominate him 🫣// 1.7k
(NSFW) Request for Genophobic virgin!Reader ❤️🩹// 5k
(NSFW) Request for Professor Spencer with a jealous gf 🐺//2k
(SFW) Request for reader helping Spencer through recovery 🤕// 1k
(NSFW) Request for possessive Spencer reacting to your little black dress 💃// 2.5k
(NSFW) PROMPT REQUEST - Undercover with an "excited" Spencer 🕵♂️// 3.6k
(SFW) Request for playing video games with Spencer 🎮// 1k
(NSFW) PROMPT REQUEST - munch! Spencer is obsessed with you 👅// 2k
(SFW) Request for Spencer babying an oblivious reader 👶// 2k
(NSFW) PROMPT REQUEST - sharing a cold bed with Frenemy Spencer 🛌// 3.5k
(NSFW) Request for reader being distracted while Spencer is reading 📚// 1k
(NSFW) Request for Pillow fort sex with Spencer ⛺️// 2k
(NSFW) Request for car confession and oral with Spencer 🚗// 1.7k
(NSFW) Request for dancing the night away with Spencer 💃// 2.5k
(NSFW) Request for the morning after Spencer loses his V-Card 😶// 0.7k
(NSFW) Request for reader confessing to Spencer when he's in his anthrax shower 🚿// 0.7k
(NSFW) Request for Spencer finding readers unusual sensitive area 🤝// 3.5k
(NSFW) Request for Spencer and Hotch!Reader secret relationship 🤐// 6k
(SFW) Request for reader being jealous of Spencer and Lila 🤽♀️// 2.1k
(NSFW) Request for gun kink 🔫//3k
(SFW) Request for Shy! Spencer and Flirty!Reader 🫣 // 2.3k
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#criminal minds#reiderrecommends#spencer reid fanfic#Masterlist#criminal minds fanfiction
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Use your 3rd house & Mercury for manifestation
Finding your own manifestation method that gives consistent results, at a consistent frequency is peak life magic for me.
My manifestation method is called "Written coloured words on calendar". I have a theory that since Mercury is associated with The Magician in Tarot, it has something to do with manifesting, especially by using verbal or written words. Mercury will help manifesting the themes of the house that it rules. While the energy of the planet that rules your 3rd house will be the tool to communicate and express your messages.
Do give it a try and tell me if it's effective for you too. If you have your own manifestation method, feel free to spread the magic.
1. What you need
Coloured pens (the colour of the ink of the pen or the lead if you are using pencils, not the colour of the case)
A calendar that has space to write on (other things like a piece of paper or notebook don't work)
Basic astrology knowledge & your chart: you should know what planet rules your 3rd house and what house does Mercury rule in your chart
2. How I do it
The colour: Choose the pen with the colour that matches the colour associated with the planet that rules your 3rd house.
The phrase: I write "I want/need change" with that coloured pen around the space of the present day on the calendar. The phrase should be short, with a broad meaning, conveys the matters related to the house that Mercury rules in your chart. Don't be too specific like I want a red dress or I want 100$, start with general terms like asking for changes, surprises, chances, opportunities, helps, guidance.
Timing: the manifestation will happen within the next week, without fail, this is how it worked for me, the speed might depend on the planet that rules your 3rd house.
Example of how it works: I have Mercury rules my 3rd house & 6th house so it can be straightforward, whenever I wrote "I want change" with green (colour of Mercury) pen on the calendar, within the next week, a new business partnership/offer & more works (3rd & 6th house matters) appeared, I met someone new who would have Gemini or Virgo or both placements in their chart, who I would do business with, work with, travel with or became my friend (3rd & 6th house matters).
*Notes:
So you won't be able to manifest other things related to different houses & planets other than 3rd house and Mercury? → Most likely, I've tried with different houses & planets but it usually had short-term effect or no observable effect, while 3rd house and Mercury gave more long-term effects.
Each manifestation works only once, if you want it to happen again, you will need to write again.
3. Colours associated with each planet & their effect
Here is the list of effects I have observed through the years practising this. It can change depending on your chart though, try to experiment with each one yourself.
Yellow - Sun: Joyful events
Grey - Moon: No observable effect
Green - Mercury: Business, friendships, partnerships (strongest manifestation power, at least for me)
Pink - Venus: Interactions, pleasant exchanges
Red - Mars, Black - Pluto: Immediate unpleasant effects like traffic problems, meeting people in bad moods, troubles with machines, things become more hectic
Navy - Saturn, Blue - Uranus, Teal - Neptune : No observable effect
Purple - Neptune/Jupiter : Increase or decrease of interactions with people, can give rise to popularity but can also slow down your progress (I haven't really figured out this one yet)
Orange - Jupiter: Chances to expand your perspective, be more brave, test your resolution and faith. Some events can be negative at first but will turn out alright, after that you will learn some valuable lessons.
About me | Masterpost
#magick#witchcraft#witches#witchblr#witch community#astrology#pick a card#astro community#astro notes#astro observations#tarotblr#tarot community#manifesting#manifestation method#law of assumption#loa#loa tips#loa tumblr#tips#colors#color astrology#3rd house#mercury#color magick#metaphysics
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My 2025 Resolutions List
Pre-New Years Resolutions (Nov/Dec 2024)
MY TIP: I think it’s important to establish pre-new year resolutions to get the momentum going for the new year. The best way to go about it is to look at your NY resolutions first, then see what you can do beforehand to prepare and those would be your Pre-New Years Resolutions
1. Prioritize Health + Fitness: Commit to a consistent fitness routine that enhances my body and confidence. I’m going to achieve this by attending 4-5 fitness sessions per week, stay disciplined with a healthy eating plan (with holiday plate exceptions), and setting physical milestones (like weighing X amount of lbs by 1/1/25)
2. Personal Branding Solid Foundation: Get clear on what personal brand I’d like to create for myself and indulge heavily in content and experiences that embody this ideal image I have for myself. I’ll achieve this by constantly checking in with myself by asking “is this on-brand with who I’d like to become?”
3. Build my Luxury Sales Career: ***For the record, I’m in luxury real estate (I’m licensed in 2 states) and international yacht sales.*** I’d like to grow on social media with my business accounts and reach my accounts to 400,000 across all of my BUSINESS platforms (right now I have a little over 350,000 followers)
2025 New Years Resolutions
1. Keep every promise I make to myself if it’s going to benefit me. I’ll make changes if something better comes along
2. Start taking reformer Pilates on a more regular basis
3. Get my desired hair length without extensions
4. Get back into coed stunting/tumbling (I was a cheerleader all my life and still love it in my 20s)
5. No more blackout nights when I drink (embarrassing but I’m such a lightweight)
6. Get back down to 110-115lbs
7. Start dating again, but dating guys that actually meet my standards and not settling because I’m bored or feeling lonely
8. Make the most $ I’ve ever made annually
9. Start fresh with my personal social media and keep my IG followers to under 10,000 (for those of you who don’t know or are new, my personal TikTok has over 1M followers and my IG is close to 800K). The issue is that I have more male followers than I do women and I want to change my IG to friends/family/acquantances/brands/women. I don’t even get paid all that much on IG anymore but TikTok I do so that’ll stay.
10. Break the habit of buying a sweet treat every single day
11. Lower my A1C to under 4.8 (it’s at 5.0 rn)
12. Practice buying quality, no matter the price point. I should be able to afford what I want if I hit my annual income goal.
13. Move to (a different city local to me) in downtown and live at (one of the new high rises they are building)
14. Become more photogenic without nitpicking every single thing about me with each picture I take— this also goes hand in hand with no longer using filters on my photos or making any changes
15. Renew my passport (I’ve been extremely lazy to do so) and travel more. My goal is to travel at least 3 times AT LEAST out of state, preferably out of country if time/work allows
16. Get close with God again. He is the only reason I got to where I am today and then I fell off.
17. Prioritize in taking care of myself and treating myself like a princess. I should always be checking in with myself by asking “is this on-brand with who I’m becoming?” and act accordingly.
18. Start going out more— go to more events, dinners, say yes to invites more, date. I’d like to increase my social calendar to at least once a week. By the end of the year, I’d like to be social at least 3-4x per week.
19. Reset my gut health and actually feel like I’m in my 20s and not in my 90s
20. Become completely unbothered and know when to emotionally detach (or avoid attachment altogether— seriously)
21. Stop oversharing… being exclusive with information about me/my life
22. Don’t dream big, but dream bigger
23. Stop being so trusting and forgiving— HUGE lesson I learned in 2024.
I’m sure I’ll be adding to this list. But any personal posts regarding my own rebrand and level up will be under the hashtag on my blog #2025. I will constantly be updating from now until the end of 2025.
#2025#level up#self care#level up journey#personal development#femininity#hypergamy#leveling up journey#that girl#leveling up#leveled up woman#leveling up tips#level up tips#femininity tips#glow up tips#self care tips#glow up journey#glow up#femininity journey#feminine journey#dream girl journey#dream girl aesthetic#dream girl#it girl aesthetic#it girl#self development#self improvement#hypergamous dating#hypergamous lifestyle#hypergamous
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A very long meta explaining why the confession scene in Good Omens is the best that has ever been written and performed on screen
First of, the scene begins with two different realisations that makes each of them believe that their dynamic will significantly change (Crowley wanting to confess his love and Aziraphale wanting to break out the news about heaven). This, you can see, creates an unprecedented shift in their energy, makes them super excited (Azi) and super nervous (Crowley) to break the news to one another. And despite the two matters being drastically different, when Aziraphale begins his revelation we don't get the Miscommunication trope where Crowley listens to the offer and passively retreats back his emotions. No. He is steadfast in his resolution, in his love for Aziraphale.
And that right here is king attitude no.1, because even if Aziraphale just threw something so godforsaken on him, he won't allow himself to be cowardly or let go of the one person he loves more than eternity. Crowley still bares his heart, still lets it all out, because he will not lose Aziraphale in his naivete of still believing that Heaven is good and Hell is evil. (I write this with supreme detachment of my own beliefs lol) He tries to make Aziraphale understand that sides didn't do them any good the past 6000 years, that the only solid foundation they ever had was them, and that Crowley would rather have them than have everything.
The way you hear Tennant's voice breaking when he said “And we spent our whole existence pretending that we aren’t”, is the perfect reflection of how Crowley genuinely despairs the time they lost and wouldn't have any more of it. And even with how bare and raw he's feeling with revealing all this, he still goes on. He still tries to tell him and I would like to spend our whole existence together, but struggles and struggles because he's strung wide open. But he keeps trying.
Now you see here a moment of disbelief on Aziraphale's behalf, because he doesn't understand why Crowley would refuse going back to heaven with him when all Aziraphale remembers of Angel!Crowley was how utterly bright his eyes shone when he lit up the stars and surely Crowley must miss that too? He wants the same thing Crowley is saying, just in a different dimension. The “I can make a difference” immediately changes to “We can make a difference” because that's all what’s ever been for Aziraphale; them changing the small engines of the world according to their partnered will. He is genuinely benign and not ill-intentioned when he says “Nothing lasts forever”, because he truly wants a better life for them, a better existence. And that's when it gets better: Crowley has his walls back up, he's walking away, because he can't bear that he was never enough as he is for Aziraphale. That he was never worth reciprocation.
But Aziraphale doesn't let him leave.
And that is king attitude no.2, because he doesn't want Crowley to leave when things are strewn all over the place that they don't know where they stand. All Aziraphale ever wanted was for them to stand on the same ground. He asks him to come back to him but hides it by finishing it with “to heaven!” because the whole conversation is going too fast for him, and he's undergoing a religious crisis of sorts that does not end in 6000 years, yet even so he still doesn't want to lose Crowley because he's everything he has and he can't do it without him and “I — I need you!”
And that's when it gets reaaally interesting. Aziraphale's expression then turns from sorrowful desperation to rageful desperation, because he's baring his heart and Crowley is walking away from him. Their solid ground is completely shaken when he says “I don't think you understand what I'm offering you” because he's trying to be subtle about his love for Crowley and still direct as much as he can, but Crowley responds with a condescending “I think I understand a whole lot better than you do” and if this isn't peak human beings in their arguments, I don't know what is. Because we all think we are so misunderstood every time we get into an argument with someone we love, and we absolutely despise it when we feel patronized, so it's no wonder Aziraphale bitterly says “Then there's nothing more to say”, because if Crowley understands, truly does, then he'd see right past his fear to how much he loves the ground Crowley walks over.
And on the other hand I don't believe Crowley truly meant to be patronizing, but in a desperate last attempt he wanted to make Aziraphale understand what he is trying to say, what he spent his entire eternity feeling for Aziraphale, what Aziraphale would be giving up if he goes to heaven. What their life sounds like with no nightingales.
“You idiot, we could've been.. us” is the very culmination of love confessions. It took every single emotion and equated it. Tennant's delivery of it was unsurpassed in the way that it truly covers everything. And the way he grabbed Aziraphale, not entirely lovingly but desperately and angrily and, honest to God, awfully, is the reason why their kiss is so perfect. No queerbaiting, no beating around bushes. It is raw and sad and giving and agonising. Crowley wants to say see what you're giving up? See what we can have? And all Aziraphale thinks is how could you lay this on me now after everything, after every chance we could've been something, after me loving you from the first time I've met you. He's angry towards himself too, because nothing he can offer Crowley will be good enough that he chooses him instead of his choices. Sheen's choice in making his character grab Crowley's shoulder and let it go and then grab it once more in desperation is so unexplainably perfect of how much Aziraphale wants to hold onto Crowley.
But in the back of his mind, Crowley isn't choosing the same. Instead, Crowley's choosing to run from something that no doubt will rebound in their faces. They are angels and demons of heaven and hell, how could Crowley expect they could run and hide without being a repercussion later on? At least what Aziraphale is suggesting ensures that they will have a high position of power, enough to make them together, enough to make them happy, but instead, Crowley is walking away.
And when Crowley lets go of him, not the other way around because of course it is Crowley who must let go and detach from the utter pain that pierced his heart, you can see his expression being one of defeated longing. He sees all expressions passing across Aziraphale, sees how torn apart the other man is, too, and awaits just a semblance of anything they could work with. But instead, Aziraphale's face closes, and he tells Crowley “I forgive you”, and Crowley thinks this must be his second falling, because he's never felt more pain. “Don’t bother”, he says, yet still waits for Aziraphale outside and doesn't leave until Aziraphale has left him. Because in the end, Crowley would always be there for Aziraphale, even if he doesn’t feel worthy of it.
And that, my beloveds, is why eternity will remember this scene.
#good omens#good omens 2#good omens spoilers#david tennant#michael sheen#good omens meta#LJ metas#regulusrules metas
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Mark Rothko Untitled 1969 Acrylic on wove paper 60 1/2 x 47 9/16 in. (153.7 x 120.8 cm) Collection National Gallery of Art, Gift of The Mark Rothko Foundation, Inc., © Kate Rothko Prizel and Christopher Rothko
Notes for Rothko nerds:
I have tried for ten years to figure out how many Black and Gray and Brown and Gray Rothkos there are from 1968/1969. These numbers are still unknown to me and I think maybe to everyone as Rothko expert David Anfam, before his recent death, told me he thought it was an unresolved issue.
There may be as many as 20 (or more) Brown and Gray paintings on paper and over the years I have posted many of them. Better scans are available to me now, so when you look at some of these it's possible I have (possibly unknowingly!) posted it before. But I have chosen to solider on in this manner because certainly the resolution quality of a new scan I post will be better and usually it will be more accurate. "Accurate" is not a word that goes well with Rothko photography and everyone knows who ever tried to take a picture of one. But that's part of why I don't mind a repeat here and there as many looks may actually provide a clearer picture of the artwork than one.
The ones I have seen in person, of course, I am a much better judge of. They tend to my eyes to be darker than the usual catalog photography, maybe for obvious practical reasons. Here's where I could say something dumb about the journey, not the destination, but my general feeling is that if I don't mind considering how much I have pored over them, I am hoping neither will you.
You can donate to my efforts here (only if you're easily able)
#mark rothko#markrothko#rothko#daily rothko#dailyrothko#abstract expressionism#modern art#abstraction#colorfield#ab ex#colorfield painting#mid century#1969
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Extortion (18+)
Jimmy Uso x Black Fem Reader
Warning: 18+ Content, detailed storyline with SMUT, MINORS DO NOT ENTER
Summary: Eight months into your relationship with Jonathan Fatu (aka Jimmy Uso), things start to feel strained. When you first met Jonathan, you had no idea who he was, as you weren't into sports, so you had no knowledge of his WWE legacy or the spotlight it would bring. As his girlfriend, you were now facing pressures you never expected, and the constant attention was beginning to take a toll on your mental health. In an effort to reconnect and help you clear your head, Jonathan decides to take you on a five-day trip to Costa Rica, promising a distraction-free escape. At a private villa, you both agree to turn off your phones and focus on nothing but each other. On the morning of your final day, you and Jonathan get carried away on the balcony, unaware that you're being watched…
Word Count: 4.6k
A/N: This will be my first shot at writing on here so please bear with me. I apologize in advance for any grammar errors or typos.
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"I just feel like you always mad at me over some shit that I can't fully control"
There it was. You and Jonathan were finally having the conversation you'd both been avoiding since arriving in Costa Rica four days ago. The first few days had been filled with beach relaxation, dining out, and exploring shops—anything to distract from the real reason for this sudden vacation. But now, on the sun-drenched balcony of the private villa you and Jonathan were sharing, it was time to confront the elephant in the room and address the growing distance between you two.
"I just didn't think it would be this hard Jon." You stated to him as you shifted your eyes from the intensity of his stare down to the watermelon you were currently having for breakfast. You picked up your fork and pushed the pieces around for a split second before deciding you weren't hungry.
"You didn't think what would be this hard baby?" Jonathan's voice was soft as he leaned closer, his cold pancakes and bacon long forgotten as he fully focused on nothing but you.
"Being in this relationship." you confessed, finally voicing what you'd been holding in for months. You loved him deeply and understood that all relationships had their challenges, but sometimes it felt like things were harder than they needed to be.
If you'd known then what you knew now, eight months ago, when you met Jonathan at the gym, you might have thought twice about giving him your number. But as the memory crept back into your mind you knew you were lying to yourself. He had you the moment his eyes locked on yours.
8 months ago you decided to fulfill your cliché New Year's resolution of hitting the gym more. You were desperately in need of a fresh start so you picked a new gym that was miles away from your old one. On one particular night, you couldn't fall asleep no matter what you tried, so around 1 am, you drove to that gym to see what it was like. Luckily for you when you arrived there were only about 3 other people in attendance. The normal people obviously sleeping at this hour. You quickly walked over and blended in with the others as you placed your AirPods in and began your routine.
About 20 minutes into your workout, that was when you first noticed him.
You were minding your business until you glanced over and almost choked on the water you were sipping. Damn, you thought, as your eyes involuntarily traveled from his neatly braided hair down to his broad shoulders. He was lifting weights, his back flexing with every rep unbeknownst to him feeding into your weird quirk for backs. If he looked this good from behind you couldn't help but wonder how much better it got from the front.
You soon got the answer to your inquiry as the man abruptly turned around and caught you staring. He indeed did look better from the front something you weren't at all surprised about. Your heart fell to your ass as you wondered if he could feel you watching him. Was that why he turned around so suddenly? You awkwardly held eye contact with him for a few seconds then sheepishly went back to your routine. But still, you just couldn't keep your eyes off of him. You felt like a creep as every so often your eyes would wander over to him only to be caught again and again. But yet ....... you swore that some of those times he was already the first one looking.
On maybe your 5th time of being caught he surprisingly started walking over to you. When he made it to where he was standing right in front of you, you removed your AirPods to give him your undivided attention.
"You don't have to be scared to approach me." He said his voice deep and playful sending a shiver through you.
"I don't bite or nothing." He added with a smile that made your knees almost give out on you. You assumed that he was boldly saying that you shouldn't be afraid to shoot your shot. But then he soon revealed that he was a Pro Wrestler who was signed with the WWE and he thought you were eyeballing him because you were too shy to ask for an autograph. It was a funny misunderstanding and you quickly explained to him that you didn't know him from anywhere which he took absolutely no offense to as you both laughed it off. You still had to come up with a reason for why you were watching him though. You opted to go with honesty and told him it was because you found him attractive. You weren't normally that up front but somehow this perfect stranger was already making you feel comfortable. He took the compliment with another flash of that breathtaking smile of his then introduced himself as Jonathan Fatu. You in return introduced yourself as Y/N and you guys chatted for a spell before he admitted that he found you attractive also. Before you left the gym he asked if he could keep in contact with you and that's where things started.
You soon found out that on top of being violently fine, Jonathan was also funny, kind, humble and extremely attentive. Everything that you could've asked for in a man and definitely a major step up from the last person you were entertaining. Things were perfect in your eyes with Jonathan when your relationship was kept between you two. But then 4 months into dating he wanted you to come to one of his matches. He ended up getting a little too friendly with you in front of the cameras and that's when people started talking. Then the problems came. First, it started with some of Jonathan's overzealous fans taking a special interest in your relationship. They started feeling the need to tag you in everything and bombard you daily with unsolicited opinions. Most of his fans were kind enough, but the trolls were relentless. Some even blamed you for Jonathan not dating one of the female wrestlers they thought he belonged with. Then came the gossip blogs getting too invested in your personal life. All of this unwanted attention was solely based on the fact that you were now Jimmy Uso's girlfriend.
You tried your best to ignore everything. You didn't enjoy being in those crowded arenas but you could tell that Jonathan loved when you came to see him. So you did that for him. You powered through all of the invasive and sometimes hateful comments. You powered through Jonathan's hectic schedule. Out of a 7-day week, you were lucky if you would get 2 full days with him but you had fallen in love so you were willing to deal with it.
But a few weeks close to a month ago your facade started to crack. You found yourself snapping at Jonathan, holding grudges, and letting your frustrations fester instead of speaking up. But you were scared. Scared that your feelings wouldn't be validated, that maybe Jonathan would think you were just looking for a reason to complain.
Of course, like most humans, he had his spare share of flaws but above it all he was genuinely such a loving man. He treated you like you were his whole world.
Like now, for instance. He sensed that something was wrong with you and cleared his whole schedule, something that was nearly impossible to do, so y'all could have this time together. So why couldn't you just suck it up?
"You know what...... never mind Jon. It's not that important," you spoke to him, plastering a fake smile on your face deciding that sucking it up was exactly what you were gonna do. Here you had this beautiful view and this beautiful man. Why ruin it over something so trivial?
"I've just been a little stressed out lately but it's fine," you said and before Jonathan could respond you stood to your feet. You fixed your robe as you slowly walked over to the railing of the balcony. You let your eyes roam over the awe-inducing scenery as you worked on swallowing your feelings ..... again. But it wasn't long before you felt Jonathan's hands on your hips gently pulling you into his arms.
"Nah don't do that Y/N." He said, his breath warm against your ear. "If it's got you feeling a way towards me then it is important."
You two stood there silently for a beat then he grabbed your hand and led you over to the couch that was placed in the corner of the balcony. He sat down and then silently tapped his lap indicating that he wanted you to join him. Without protest, you straddled his lap, your body instinctively seeking comfort in his presence.
"Get it off your chest." Jonathan urged his dark eyes locking on yours as you placed your hands on his shoulders. You signed, your heart beginning to pound but you knew that you had to speak up if you two were ever going to reach a resolution.
"I love you, Jon. You know that," you said beginning to speak freely without worrying too much about the consequences. "But it's just that at times everything that comes with being with you ....... it all gets to be too much"
"The lights.... the cameras.... the attention. I just wanted you, Jonathan. I never wanted all of this. Before you, my life was so simple. I could say, go, and do whatever I wanted. But now I have all of these eyes on me. " you laid out to him as he focused on you intently. His eyes caught your every move as he silently allowed you to pour out your heart without any interruption.
"I know you can't change who you are Jon and I wouldn't want you to. I love that you get to live out your family's legacy. But this lifestyle..... your lifestyle .... I don't think it's for me." you finalized what you were feeling to him and now all you had to do was wait to see how he was going to react.
"So.... wait a minute..... what does that mean?" Jonathan asked as you watched confusion arise on his beautiful brown features. He adjusted you on his lap as he tightened his grip around your waist.
"You saying you don't want to be with me no more Y/N"
Visual hurt flashed in his eyes as he searched your face for understanding. This was another reason why you'd been afraid to bring it up. You didn't want him to jump to conclusions. But you understood his reaction. Jonathan couldn't change who he was, and what he represented meant the world to him. If you couldn't handle the spotlight that came with being committed to him, maybe the only option was to walk away. But despite that, you also knew that you were in too deep to go anywhere now.
"No, that's not what I'm saying, Jon. I'm just telling you what's been bothering me." you quickly reassured him as you moved your hand up to gently cup the side of his face. You felt his body relax again under your touch.
"I won't lie like the thought hasn't crossed my mind though." You admitted to him. "But I'm in love with you, Jonathan. And that's bigger than anything else I may be feeling."
You sighed then said, "I just get a little overwhelmed sometimes." You ran your fingers through his hair, one of your favorite things about him, before dropping your hand back down to rest on his shoulder.
"You need to tell me when you're feeling like that Y/N so we can figure it out together," Jonathan spoke, his tone soft and comforting. "And when I can I'll take you away from it for a little while."
"I'm use to my lifestyle 'cause I've been in it all of my life but I know everything can't be easy for you 100 percent of the time. But don't bottle that shit up. Just talk to me whenever you feeling like you can't handle it. Alright?" he told you, his eyes reflecting how much he meant every word. You nodded at him in response feeling 10 times better now that you two had finally confronted the issue. Of course, talking about it wouldn't make things cease to exist. Tomorrow Costa Rica would be over and the real world would be waiting. But at least you knew now that whenever things got too tough you could have a moment with Jonathan about it.
"Thank you for understanding Jon. I feel so much better now." you expressed to him. Feeling so overcome with gratitude you tilted your head down and placed a light peck on his lips that he surprisingly didn't return. He sat there in a dead silence that began to make you get all anxious about the situation again.
"I don't" he finally spoke. His face was stern and his dark eyes glared into yours. You searched his facial features for a hint of amusement but found none.
"I don't like you having crazy ass thoughts about not wanting to be with me." He spoke as he moved his hands from around your waist to slowly trail them up your robe all the while keeping his eyes locked on yours. As his big hands gripped your thighs with a possessive firmness, you instantly knew exactly where his mind had shifted. And you were 100 percent with it.
"You gotta make that shit up to me." He said with a smile as he took hold of the string that was holding your robe in place.
"I'll try" you responded playfully as he fully undid the string.
"You gone do more than that." He commented as he pulled the top half of your robe down your shoulders revealing your breast to the open air because all you had on underneath was a pair of panties. Gently grabbing you by the neck with one hand Jonathan pulled your mouth to his. He ran his tongue along your bottom lip before closing in on the kiss. As you two fell into a familiar rhythm you felt his other hand moving up your stomach until it reached one of your breasts. As he slowly started caressing the nipple with his thumb his mouth moved from yours down to your neck. After planting a few kisses along your collarbone he then moved his full attention down to your chest.
"Ummm" a soft moan left your lips as his warm tongue connected with your right nipple as he used his hand to play with and tease the other. You were so wrapped up in pleasure that it barely crossed your mind that you and Jonathan were basically outside right now. You had never engaged in sex in a place that wasn't closed off. Whether it was a bedroom, a bathroom, a car, whatever. Each place had always had a door to close you two off from the rest of the world. So being out on this balcony was a new experience for you. You thought that maybe you should tell Jonathan to move things inside but you didn't want to interrupt the current state he had you in. Besides the villa was private. The workers were on call so you and Jonathan were the only two in the house. There was nothing to stress about. So you allowed your mind and body to be completely immersed in the moment as you felt your wetness and desperate need for Jonathan grow.
"You been playing with me since we got here but I got you," Jonathan told you bringing your mind back to him as he tilted his head back to look at you. You knew that he was referring to the fact that you hadn't done anything sexual with him since the plane landed. In your previous relationship, sex was used to cover up most of the issues you and that person had. Nothing was ever discussed, talked out, or even really resolved. You didn't want to start that habit with Jonathan so you thought it would be better to abstain from doing anything with him on this little vacation until things were figured out. It wasn't easy because Jonathan tried every trick in the book but you stood your ground spamming the hell out of that I'm just not in the mood excuse. Which was definitely a bald-faced lie. You've wanted Jonathan in the worst way since you guys arrived. So bad that you even started dreaming about it. Lucky for you things were okay enough for you to now indulge. So indulge… you would.
"Take these off," Jonathan told you as he reached down and tugged at the brim of your panties. Obeying him you removed yourself from his lap and stood to your feet. You took your robe the rest of the way off letting it hit the balcony floor followed by your underwear. The sun and Jonathan's eyes were glued to your naked body as he took you in. 8 months later he still had that same hunger in his eyes each time you two found yourselves in this position. Looking into your eyes Jonathan then stood to his feet also. His 6'3 frame towered over you as he came out of his boxers and the grey sweatpants he had on. You both were now naked as the day you came into this world out on a balcony in Costa Rica but that was the last thing on your minds. The sexual tension was thick in the air as Jonathan sat back down on the couch while taking hold of your hand. He tried pulling you back down on his lap but you had something else in mind. You reached past him and grabbed one of the pillows off of the couch. You dropped the pillow down on the floor between his legs before dropping down to your knees on top of it. You watched Jonathan run his tongue across his lips at the sight as you took his dick into your hands.
"You look so fucking good." He complimented you as you slowly stroked his dick up and down with your manicured fingers while keeping your eyes on his. Deciding not to tease him any longer you shifted your focus down to what was in your hands. Picking up a little more speed with your stroking you took the tip of his dick into your mouth and started slowly running your tongue around it.
"Shit" you heard Jonathan grunt as you took as much of him as you could into your mouth coating him in your saliva. You suddenly felt him grab hold of the braids you got solely for coming to Costa Rica. He gathered them into a makeshift ponytail as you went to work on his dick. Jonathan moaned and cussed as you completely lost yourself in pleasing him. His moans were always the most intoxicating thing to you so it wasn't long before you felt yourself throbbing with urgent need. Not being able to resist you let go of his dick with one hand to reach down to please yourself while tending him. You gently rubbed your clit as you took some time to spit on Jonathan's dick before taking him into your mouth again. You shoved him so far into your mouth that his dick was damn near down your throat but at times like this, you didn't care if you suffocated. Jonathan used your hair to guide you up and down to his liking while your fingers slipped over your clit as your wetness became almost unbearable. You knew Jonathan's body well at this point so you knew when he was near his climax. You felt that feeling coming as he gripped your hair tighter and barely could sit still on the couch.
"Fuck Y/N" he grunted softly before shooting his seed into your mouth. You caught as much as you could and collected the rest before swallowing.
"Come here" Jonathan told you while helping you up. Neither one of you were anywhere close to being done with the session yet so within seconds you found yourself sliding down onto his dick. This was what your body was craving the most and yet the feeling was still overpowering as you came all the way down on his full length.
"S-shit" you let out as your body shuddered at the feeling of him having him inside of you. Jonathan's hand was back around your throat again as you begin to bounce up and down on his dick. How wet you were could be heard as Jonathan moved his hips up to meet you halfway every single time.
"Look at me Y/N" you heard his voice say not even realizing that your eyes were closed. You were so focused on trying not to cum too soon as his dick repeatedly connected with your g-spot. You listened to him and opened your eyes to the best of your ability and found his eyes fixated on your face like they always were anytime he had you in this position. He leaned in and pulled you into a kiss as he wrapped his other arm around your waist. Holding you tighter he picked up his pace and began to pound into your wetness from below.
"J-Jon" you moaned his name as you broke the kiss. You were in fear that you were going to bite down and draw blood from his lip something you couldn't do especially with his profession.
"Look at you," Jonathan said as he watched the faces you made as you took every inch of him.
"You not going nowhere .... you love this dick too much" he gloated. In response, your eyes retreated to the back of your head. Jonathan who always spoke such sweet words to you turned into a totally different person when he was fucking you. And you enjoyed every minute of it.
"Tell me you love this dick Y/N" he demanded from you as his grip on your neck got tighter and your need to cum grew stronger.
"I l-love it J-Jon" you muttered followed by many profanities as his pace quickened and you fought to keep up. You could feel your walls clenching around him indicating that you were losing the fight. Your climax was so close that you could feel it darting up your legs.
"I can't hear you. Speak the fuck up." Jonathan commanded.
"I love it" you whined out louder as your climax reached the pit of your stomach.
"FUCK ... I love it." came out louder as you bounced on Jonathan's dick with more determination than ever as your whole body became heated all over.
"Cum for me then." He told you as he released your neck and reached down to massage your clit to aid you in reaching your peak. It only took a minute of feeling Jonathan's fingers on your clit combined with his dick hitting your g spot before you found yourself making a mess on his lap. Your climax hit you full force as your body twitched and shook as Jonathan's dick became drenched in your cum. Not long afterwards he cursed and shot his load into you while repeatedly saying your name. You both were breathless and it took serval minutes to come back down to earth. Once you did you cleaned yourselves up and decided to spend the rest of your last day in Costa Rica out and about.
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Day 6 came quicker than you wanted but it was time to pack for your flight back to the United States in a few hours.
"Shit, I hope I didn't miss nothing too important," Jonathan said while you sat on the bed folding clothes and putting them back into your suitcase while he turned on his phone which had been off for the last 5 days. You both made a mutual agreement to ignore the rest of the world so your phones were shut off immediately after arriving. You tried to convince Jonathan that ditching his phone wasn't needed because you understood that he was a very busy person but he insisted on focusing on nothing but you on this trip.
Your phone remained shut off on the nightstand because you didn't feel as compelled to get back on it as him. Your mom and best friend could wait.
"Damn," you commented to Jonathan while lifting your brows at him because when he did power his phone back on it began to bing and buzz in his hand nonstop.
"Shit, I got like 30 missed calls from Tamina," he told you referring to his manager.
"Go handle it I'll finish packing for you." You told him. You knew that if she called that many times then it had to be something beyond urgent. Jonathan left the room as you continued to collect yours and his belongings. As you moved around the room you wondered what could be so urgent while at the same time hoping it wasn't that big of a deal. It took a little over 30 minutes for Jonathan to return to the room. When he came scrolling back in the look on his face told you that whatever Tamina was calling him about was indeed a big ass deal.
"Baby sit down." He told you.
"What is it Jon?" you asked him as you ignored his request for you to sit down.
"I don't know how to explain or tell you this so here," he said while holding out his phone to you. You were confused and your heartbeat quickened as you took hold of his phone. When you looked down the first thing you saw was what looked like an email with a few attachments.
"One of the workers must've tipped somebody off or something. I don't know how this shit happened. This villa was supposed to be private." Jonathan said to you as you read the email and became mortified. Suddenly you started to feel a little dizzy as you tried to process what you just read. Whoever sent the email was demanding 50 thousand dollars to be sent to them or they were going to sell some inappropriate images of you and Jonathan to the highest bidder. All you could think was who, what, and how? On top of being modified, you became sick to your stomach as you opened the attached files and saw pictures of you and Jonathan out on the balcony yesterday morning. The pictures were slightly blurry and looked like they were taken from a very far distance. But because of Jonathan's hair and his distinct tribal tattoos, it was easy to tell that it was either him or his twin brother Joshua. This was just yesterday morning so you wondered how in the hell could someone get ahold of something like this so quickly. But then you connected that if the person took those pictures yesterday morning then they had the whole rest of the day to send the information around. They did this without you and Jonathan knowing a thing because your phones were off.
Overcome with a feeling that you couldn't put into words your breathing became labored as you could visibly see the room start spinning before you.
"Baby, are you alright?" Jonathan's voice questioned you. It sounded like it came from a great distance, but he was standing right in front of you. The room began to spin faster as you stumbled back. Jonathan moving closer to you was the last thing you remembered before things went completely black.
#jimmy uso#jimmy uso x black reader#jimmy uso smut#jimmy uso x oc#jimmy uso x you#jimmy uso x reader#the bloodline x reader#jimmy uso fanfiction#wwe imagine#black writers#black women writers#black reader
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I have seen little to no support for the strike from fellow Canadians about the current Canadian Postal workers who are out there protesting for better work conditions. Canadian Postal workers =/= Canada post. Currently workers are striking for pay that has been stagnated as well as benefits being halted. Some of the things I want to debunk with all anti-worker talk about the strike. 1) "Our tax dollars pay for them! They should just go back to work! They are losing money!" False! They aren't GOVERNMENT JOBS they are a CROWN CORPORATION, they are still structured and operated as a legal corporation. The head people are still CEOS who get paid millions in bonuses as the corporation fails or makes bad decisions such as buying new vehicles that make workers feel unsafe, can't fit in urban areas, cost so much more! 2) "They don't provide a useful service its only flyers" "what about my cheque!" It can't be both, you can't claim Canada Post workers are useless for spam mail while also touting small businesses are failing, people needing their pay, and delivering where other courier services wont! Currently Canadian Postal workers will deliver benefit checks and child support on volunteer. 3)"Why are they striking now when its busiest??" They are striking now because it will affect you to care, its moot point to strike when there is little to no leverage against. THATS THE POINT OF ANY PROTEST! Show solidarity with the workers, if you have issues and want the strike to end complain to the company to work with the union (who have been asking for a resolution for years before wanting to strike) RAISE AWARENESS FOR IT.
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Empty Movement's 2023 Revolutionary Girl Utena UPDATE
Fashionably late? As always. 2023 was a HUGE year for Empty Movement, so much so that to confess, we did a big fail in actually keeping up with sharing the stuff we did! OOPS. So finally, we proudly bring you: all the Revolutionary Girl Utena content we dropped in 2023. Essays, artbooks, CD information, you name it. Click below for the entire site update, or get it at the source, as always, at ohtori.nu.
In Analysis (Fan Essays): • seebee's essay The Power of Living an Embodying Narrative is about more than Utena, it's about the fandom--including us. We were both interviewed for this piece, and the result is an absolutely beautiful essay that has helped inform how we do Utena stuff going forward. Thank you so much for letting us be part of this! • seebee's VIDEO essay FILM CUTS BACK | transfeminism in utena absolutely blew our minds and it's so good we're listing it. Look at the title. Just go watch it, it rules. • Nicole Winchester's essay No Choice But To Become Witches: The Bishōjo-Demonic Phallic Mother Dichotomy in Revolutionary Girl Utena catches you up to speed on the academic discussion around what might best be described as the shoujo manga iteration of the Madonna-Whore complex. Then, naturally, it finds plenty to say about Utena. Great work that was well worth the coding!
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In From the Mouths of Babes (Translated Meta/Creator Content): • Cross X Talk, A Round Table Discussion Commemorating the Second Musical Utena GOGAI FUCKIN' GOGAI. Nagumo and friends bring us the final untranslated part of the 2019 Black Rose Musical's program guide: the monster interview with Ikuhara and the director of the musicals, Yoshitani. INCREDIBLE content here that 100% lives up to the first musical's similar encounter! A must read!! • The Rose Apocalypse's Ei Takatori Interview The director of the mysterious 1999 musical (yes the machine gun one, and YES WE HAVE MORE INFORMATION ABOUT IT COMING) interviewed in The Rose Apocalypse book. This...is that. Thank you so much to iris hahn for translating, and I can't wait to bring you more of this mythology!!! • The Utena Dossier Animage Magazine's June 1997 supplemental, this 36-page Utena tome has ben translated by Nagumo with editing by Ayu Ohseki. Because so much of the content is in its visual presentation, I worked the translation into the original scans! Check it out! (PS. Yes that is an entirely different gallery on the emptymovement.com domain, no this won't stay there, yes it has been a weird couple years.) The Dossier includes two long interviews that are also worked into html pages for easy viewing! The Auspicious Joining of Manga and Anime: Saito and Hasegawa For Whom the Director Smiles: Ikuhara and Kitakubo
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In Historia Arcana & The Bibliothèque (Untranslated Resources): • There are a lot of changes happening in this arena!!! How and where to place different materials has been a moving target, so I'll do my best! The sites don't quite reflect this yet, but Historia Arcana will be for cover to cover Utena media, including special magazine publications. Something Eternal's gallery, the Bibliothèque, will be for magazine articles, clippings, and other things. Major artbooks will likely be in both places, cross referenced. New books in Historia Arcana: • The Rose Spiral: Reflections on the Mythology of Utena While not strictly official, this is a fan published book of in depth analysis of Utena, circa 1998! Yep, cover to cover. • Revolution Dictionary (OST 1 First Press Bonus) Cross-referenced from Audiology, this is the bonus dictionary you only got if you grabbed it early! Cool! • Revolutionary Girl Utena Making of Visuals Book Art of UTENA I am mentioning this for completions sake and because I already uploaded it, but this is a cover to cover high resolution, uncleaned scan of the 1999 Art of Utena artbook. I am going to clean the scans, and ultimately be posting the official artbooks elsewhere. • Revolutionary Girl Utena Photobook: Rose Memories This special Animage bonus could be purchased for 700 yen, and back then, was probably a great way to keep the anime in your pocket! It's entirely shots from the TV series, though, so there's nothing specifically new. But I scan it all, baby. New books in the Bibliothèque: • Chiho Saito's 1999 Revolutionary Girl Utena Original Illustration Collection HI THIS IS A VERY BIG DEAL. Read more about why when you visit! TLDR? Here's some of the best artwork of Utena, rescanned and remastered by yours truly to be the best big big scans of big big beautiful Chiho Saito Art. This is a feast. I even made myself a calendar! (Note that the price is such that I don't make a profit on these, so if you're looking to donate, definitely go by other routes, haha.) You will find multiple ways to obtain the scans, and in more than one size. Either way you soak up the rays, enjoy 'em! New articles and clips in the Bibliothèque: • H! Rockin' on Japan Magazine Saito X Oikawa This fashion music magazine's July 1999 article has ALREADY BEEN TRANSLATED? Like, I am going to add the translation officially to the site of course, but holy hell Nagumo is amazing!! This article is actually the origin of a Saito art piece that uh, well. Now we know she went to a love hotel with movie Akio's VA. Cool! Anyway check it out! • Comickers Magazine, August 1997 This absolute monster find is an industry-focused magazine with this gorgeous spread and interview with Chiho Saito. It gets into how she does things. The making of Utena. All kinds of stuff. I'd LOVE to know more about this one!! • Comickers Magazine, June 1998 Again, an industry-focused publication, this time it's exploring the manga and the anime and how they compare. Again looks like a tasty meal!! • Volks Magazine, Spring 2022 YEP SCANS OF THE BOOK OF THE DOLLFIES. For a lot of us, this is at close as we get to these ludicrously gorgeous dolls. I included a few extra pages because they were just fuckin' cool and felt relevant. • Sega Saturn Magazine, December 1997 One of two grabs I got recently on Yahoo! Japan! This appears to be the first look announcement of the 1998 Utena video game! (Yes we have more on it, yes we will eventually post links.) • Sega Saturn Magazine, April 1998 This feature brings attention to the voice actors, who are all returning for the game! • Dengeki G's Magazine, January 1998 Another gaming focused magazine, with frankly a more adult edge, cheaply lets the readers know about Utena. These three game magazine moments are just a bizarre reminder of how we did things before the internet, LMAO
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In Audiology (Music and CD Information): • Complete information about the STAR CHILD - Girls Character Song Best album! You also definitely can't grab the two new remix tracks there. • Did you know there was a first press bonus dictionary for the first OST? I DIDN'T UNTIL RECENTLY. Now I know all about it, and so can you. Check it out! Obviously, scans available, both here and in Historia Arcana. • I FINALLY acquired a complete set of the Utena CD singles!! Check out complete track lists, scans, and information for ALL FIVE Utena singles. Yes. Including the movie Akio guy's one.
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In The Doujinshi Gallery: • Several dozen dounjinshi were uploaded earlier in the year, and can be found listed on the Site Update archive here.
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That's all for now, folks! There's so so so much coming. I have the episode 18 and 20 (!!!!) storyboards to scan, as well as a fully translated scanlation of The Duelist Bible. We're planning to do something for Anthy's rare LEAP YEAR birthday coming up, probably a musical stream or something! Love!
#revolutionary girl utena#rgu#empty movement#empty movement update#utena meta#chiho saito#shoujo kakumei utena#utena movie#utena merch#utena
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