#but I am using some of my own experiences to flesh her out. That's all I'm trying to do | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fernandopiastri28 · 1 year ago

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high for this ~ oscar piastri

Notes:

i am officially finished with holidays and back to school :/ so im going to be posting a lot less but i do have a few works just rotting in my drafts so i'll probably just be changing the names of characters and posting them. (not proof read so i apologise if there's any mistakes)

warnings: smut, weed, drug use, mdni

Oscar mindlessly lays sprawled out on his bed, his muscles aching from the gym earlier in the day. He tenderly rubs his hamstring, trying to nurse it back to not being too sore for his match tomorrow.

He has some music playing as quietly as possible, a pulsing tune of some heavy rap. It’s not really to his taste, but he’s bored with his own playlists at the moment. His phone is near the foot of his outstretched left leg, while his right leg is tucked up towards his torso, his knee pointing high towards the ceiling. Both hands are hard at work around his right leg, his fingers pressing into the tough flesh.

He feels a buzz travel through his left foot as his nails dig into his skin. He makes a note to cut them. He hears the buzz too, this time over the sound of the music. He sits up awkwardly, wincing at the strain on his leg. Using his left hand, he picks up his phone and checks the two new messages he’s received.

It’s Talia, unsurprisingly. She should be asleep, though, she promised him she’d start working on fixing her sleep schedule. He clicks the notifications, squinting to see the messages with the medical white lights flashing in his eyes in comparison to the darkened room.

tals🧡: you up?

tals🧡: do u wanna come over

Oscar shifts around in his bed so his back is pressed against a stack of pillows. He brings his hand away from his hamstring, ignoring the dull shoot of pain that runs up his leg once it loses his attention.

They don’t do a lot of sneaking over to each other's houses, simply because they can see enough of one another during school days, so it isn’t anything essential. They get in all the kissing, cuddling, and make outs they want to during the day, so if she’s suggesting this, it means sex.

Not necessarily just sex, anything within the umbrella of sexual activity. Oscar shifts his hips, trying to decide what he wants to do. They live pretty far from each other, meaning for him to sneak over, it's a 25-minute walk each way since he can’t just take the family car. It’s late—nearing midnight—and he’s sore. On the other hand, he’s horny.

And at Talia’s house, she doesn’t live with her parents. She lives with two of her close friends, skipped out on the college experience after her first year. Oscar didn’t get that luxury, much like his older sisters. Both of them lived at home for uni. But while she’s off now in France, he’s still a third year university student. Since her family won’t even be there, they don’t have to worry about being sneaky or quiet.

Oscar: Yeah. See you soon

He unplugs his phone and slips his feet into the pair of slides that are sitting at the foot of his bed. He opens his wardrobe, grazing his fingers over the line up of shirts that rest there. He grabs a graphic white t-shirt, wrestling it on. He cracks open his door, walking past his sister’s and the guest room, both vacant. His parents are on the level upstairs, so they can’t hear any disturbance he’s making.

He settles for catching the bus instead, unwilling to walk up to an hour. He sits down in a row of empty seats, ducking his head down and popping an earbud in. There’s a scarce number of other people on the bus, two girls sitting close together, their heads spinning drunkenly. An old man, greying hair and a newspaper in his callused hands.

tals🧡: come thru window. sammy will bark otherwise.

Oscar replies with the hard thought out reply of a thumbs up before re-pocketing his phone, staring mindlessly out of the window at the dark surroundings that whip by.

Oscar gets off at his stop 10 minutes later, and he’s the last person on the bus by that point. He approaches Talia’s house, not even bothering to go through the front door- Sammy would bark and wake the whole house up. He clicks open the gate, dragging it out only just enough to slip in. He walks across the side of the house, tapping on her bedroom window once he gets to it. He presses a hand to his pocket, making sure the pack of condoms he grabbed are still there.

The curtains swish open and Talia’s standing there, fiddling to get the window open. Once it's open, he feels a rush of cold air hitting him, accompanied by the smell of something almost like diesel. “Hey,” He grins as she leans down.

She narrowly avoids the kiss he’s going for, giving him one on the corner of his mouth. “Sorry- god, it’s dark,” Her shadow rubs her eyes, reaching out a hand to help him in.

Climbing in through the window isn’t a difficult task- just slightly uncomfortable. His crotch rubs against the window pane as he brings his second leg over into her room. Talia wraps her arms around his waist as soon as he’s inside. “Hi, Oscccc,” She looks up at him, her teeth gleaming white.

Just as Oscar is about to reply, the petrol smell hits him even harder. He crinkles his nose, confused as to what it is. “Tals, what the hell have you been smoking in here?,” He laughs, his hands grabbing at her ass to get her to wrap her legs around his waist. His voice is thick with sarcasm, Talia is the furthest thing from a druggy possible.

“Weed,” She rubs her lips into his shoulder, mouthing at the fabric of her shirt. Her mouth is dry, barely wetting the cloth. Oscar’s eyebrows knit, tensing in confusion. “Got a joint, was bored,” She mumbles.

He doesn’t believe what he’s hearing. At the same time, it’s late- his mind is cloudy anyways. He looks past her, at her bed where there’s a metal tin and a joint laying on top of it. Explains the smell then. “Fuck Talia,” He lets out a deep breath, “Maddie and Amber can definitely smell it,” He groans.

Talia laughs, her voice thick and loopy. “Nah, they cleared out tonight so I could do this.” She pulls away from the embrace, tugging him after her by his shirt. She falls back against the bed, her eyes clearly red rimmed from the dim lighting over her bed. “Cmonnn Opie, wanna get stoned with you,”

It’s so strange to see her like this, but he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t hot. It’s so unexpected, such a pleasant surprise from his usually wound up and rule following girlfriend. Oscar’s resistance weakens, the sight of her laying there- a goofy grin plastered across her voice is enough to make the strong man give in.

He hovers over her on the bed, a knee on either side of her hips and a hand on either side of her head. “You’re insane,” His mouth meets red, puffy lips for a kiss. She’s hungry for it, bringing her hands up to his hair to tug him down.

“More,” Talia begs, her voice breathy. Her pupils are huge and there's a spacey look in her eyes. Oscar teases her, shaking his head as he slightly resists kissing her any further than little pecks.

“I want a drag,” He whispers, reaching over her to where the blunt is precariously resting. He places it in between his lips, the bitter taste already seeping into his mouth. “Light it up,” He murmurs around the lump in his mouth.

Her mouth and ears feel as if they’ve been packed with cotton, his voice is far away and just barely a noise. “You don’t know how to,” She giggles weakly, her fingers pinching the fabric of his shirt that hangs down onto her.

Oscar gets off of her, sitting against the head of her bed. His legs are spread, his body slumped down comfortably. “Teach me,” He pats the space in front of his lap, his eyes looking up through his lashes. Talia’s mind is foggy with weed, lust, and need. She’s willing to do anything.

“Take this,” she pushes a plastic water bottle into one of his hands, already unscrewed and partially drunk. “You’re gonna cough a lot- the water will help with that,” she explains, leaning forward with her hands propped up on his quads, pushing the hem of his shorts higher up.

She reaches over to where the bottle had been and her fingers feel numb as they wrap around the lighter. “You feel good?” She asks as he twists the joint around between his lips. He doesn’t quite know how to answer, it feels like a question for after he’s actually smoked it. He nods regardless, tensing his leg muscles under her hands.

“I’m gonna light it, okay?” Another question from her. Her voice is becoming harder to understand, the true effects of the weed settling into her. It’s bizarre to him, this whole situation. “And you just try to inhale as much as possible,” She waits for a nod of competency from him before continuing. “Don’t let it just rest in your throat- it’ll burn. If you can’t do a lot, just do it in small bits,”

Oscar’s hand snakes behind her, resting on the small of her back. “Ready,” He mumbles awkwardly. She clicks down on the lighter and a flame flickers, wavering just below his nose.

“Don’t stress it,” She can see how his eyebrows are still furrowed and his nails are digging into the fabric of her shirt. It’s almost euphoric at first, then it’s hell. Heat fills his mouth and he’s coughing and wheezing. He did exhale- probably too much.

He feels Talia’s hands all over him, her coldness contrasting against the warmth throbbing through himself. She takes the spliff from his mouth, sucking down on it herself. Oscar watches her hazily, his bottom lip tucked under teeth.

“How long have you been doin’ this?” The words feel as if they’re not coming from him. Jesus, surely he’s not baked already. He feels the heavy weight of the joint being pushed between his lips again, his question seemingly going unanswered.

He takes it, breathing it in again. He doesn’t let it rest in his throat, he focuses on the inhale. He doesn’t cough as much this time, but he still guzzles down what’s left in the bottle.

They spend a few minutes alternating the spliff, blowing air into eachothers faces. The room reeks of weed and it’s boiling hot. He wipes the back of his neck with his hand, a line of sweat gathering there. She twists the hem of his shirt between her index and thumb, pulling it up slightly. She doesn’t need to ask- he takes it off for her.

“I started when I first moved here,” She finally answers his question from earlier, dragging a thumb down his cheek, rubbing the back of his jawline. “I think one of Mads’ friends gave her a bunch because she was moving- couldn’t take ‘em. Us three smoked them one night, it was fun,” She mumbles. It means she’s only been doing it for about 3 years now.

He tilts his head, resting it against a pillow. She presses the pad of her thumb into his bottom lip that he’s unconsciously pouting out- asking for either another drag or a kiss. “Wanted to introduce you,” Her lips turn into a smirk, her eyes half-lidded.

“And why’s that?” He teases, his other hand moving down to her ass. Talia looks to the side behind him, a knowing look on her face. She pulls herself into his lap, effectively straddling him.

“I wanted to get high,” She states plainly, “and when I’m high- I’m horny. Wanted to be like that with you,” Her eyes are bright and her cheeky are rosy. Oscar kisses her cheek, experimenting with how his mouth is getting drier and more uncomfortable. Once he feels some moisture returning, he kisses further along her jaw.

She has the spliff in her mouth which forces him away from her mouth. He focuses on her jaw and neck, suckling near her collarbone. She moans, tugging his hair and effectively his head back up. She places the joint in his mouth again and pulls on the pillow behind him. He tilts his head enough for her to move it out of the way, leaving him laying down almost completely flat.

He watches dazily as she pulls her top off, leaving her in a lacy white bra. He reaches out, his fingers barely feeling her flesh. He knows he’s touching her, she’s making noises to confirm it. “ More , more , fuck ,” She’s begging, her voice so desperate. Oscar wishes he wasn’t so fucking spacey right now so he could see how wanton she was over him.

He tips his head forward, looking past where smoke is burning into his eyes. He’s apparently not just touching her bra, he’s touching her fully exposed breast. He hasn’t realised up until this point that he’s actually hard.

“Can I shotgun you?” She asks, her fingers snaking over his nipples. He whimpers at the touch and his mouth drops open around the blunt. He knows he’s out of it, but he’s consciously thinking enough to know that shotgunning is either claiming the front seat in a car, or piercing a beer can and then drinking it as fast as possible.

He settles with the assumption it must be the second one. He lols his head to the side, searching for where the beer is. “Yeah,” He hums, his hand dropping down over the edge of the bed and his hand swinging with the intention of hitting a can that isn’t actually there.

Talia laughs, tugging on his bicep. “Shotgun- I puff smoke into your mouth,” She explains, her voice all raspy from being so dry. Oscar licks over his teeth, his mouth still painfully dry. His mind feels empty, the only resounding thought is just talia, talia, talia. There are a few other ideas, sex stuff, nothing coming close to being as important as making her happy.

She leans forward, plucking the joint from his mouth. He gets a breath of fresh air and begins to gasp for it- a telltale sign he’s had too much in one go. He hollows his cheeks, cleaning the taste of smoke out of his mouth with spit. It’s a useless attempt as it’s already well stained.

She slides two fingers into his mouth, pressing down on his bottom teeth. She lays down on him, her legs still hooked around his hips and a hand pressing to the headboard above him. Their chests are pressing together, her boobs heavy on him. He stares at them, shamelessly, his cock getting even harder to the point he’s beginning to actually feel it.

“Can you suck my cock?” His voice is strangled and on the verge of incoherency because of her digits pressing into his tongue. She nods, kissing the tip of his nose. Her other hand is still holding onto the spliff, just sliding it against her wettened bottom lip. She finally sucks down on it, her lips twisting around it to keep the smoke in.

His mouth opens out of instinct, his eyes going bright just thinking about her mouth. The second their lips meet and he feels a slow release of smoke into his mouth, he feels like he’s dying. His eyes roll back and he grips a hand to the back of her head, pushing their mouths into each other’s harder.

He’s kissing her like it’s the only thing keeping him alive. It’s disgustingly dirty, a combination of spit, teeth, tongues and far too much moaning. Being stoned apparently just makes him feel everything . His lips are on fire, his throat is on fire, his eyes are on fire, his dick is on fire.

Their mouths pull apart, sticky from the remnants of lip gloss that Talia has on. He peppers her face with a few more kisses, desperate for the stinging burn. They look at each other for a few moments, a complete disconnect from the two of them and the rest of the world.

“You still want it?” She’s semi sitting up now, her elbows resting on where his hips are poking out from his low sitting shorts. His mind goes blank at the question, unsure of what she could possibly asking.

“What?” He lets out a puff of air, his hand mindlessly travelling through her hair. She nudges low down on his abdomen with her nose, making a weird squeaking whine.

“Suck you off,” She looks up at him, the green in her eyes barely just a thin ring around her blown up pupils. Oscar nods, shifting further down the bed. Her fingers hook into his waistband, an invitation. His eyes flicker shut, already wasted off the feeling of her hands tugging his shorts down.

Cold air whacks into the tops of his thighs, the dark fluffs of hair standing up. Oscar doesn’t need to tell her what to do, it seems like every time she’s gotten baked before this has been spent with her preparing for this.

Talia begins aimlessly mouthing at his crotch, licking and kissing over where the head is resting. Her mouth is wetter than his, seemingly soaked with saliva. He takes a drag from the blunt, his fingers retracting and stretching to scratch her head. She purrs at the motion, getting more eager around him.

“Cmon princess,” Oscar murmurs, helping to slide his boxers down to mid thigh. He doesn’t wince or shiver when it meets the cold air as there’s barely any time for it to do so. The second he’s fully undressed, her warm mouth is engulfing his length.

She bobs her head up and down, her lips tightening around his shaft and her cheeks hollowing for him. He’s pushing her head down without realising, the pressure is light but definitely suggestive.

She doesn’t gag, just takes him further. He encourages her with a string of moans mindlessly escaping his mouth, mixed in with ‘ oh god, good girl’ and ‘that's perfect, princess, keep going’. He’ll smoke or eat edibles every weekend if this is how getting head feels like when he does.

Her nose presses into his crotch, her throat muscles working hard to accommodate the intrusion of him. He tries to touch her, help her get off while she’s giving him the blowjob he’s ever received but the way she’s lying with the rest of her body so far away, he settles for focusing the pleasure elsewhere.

He rubs his thumbs over her nipples, feeling them harden under his touch. She whimpers and whines, her moans choking into noises that sound like she’s crying. Her face is reddened and her hair is sweaty, her fringe plastered down to her forehead with sweat.

“Close, I’m close,” He twists some of her hair around his index, his middle finger tapping into the top of her hair. She looks up at him with glassy eyes and tensed eyebrows.

“In me,” She gags around his length. She doesn’t need to ask twice. He fucks his hips up into her mouth, forcing a moan and a gag from the back of her throat as he releases into her.

He feels spent, his body aching worse than it did back at home.

She pulls off slowly, her lips oiled with spit and cum. Her neck muscles flicker with tension as she swallows it down. That’s new. She’s strictly been a ‘spitter’ to this very moment. He wipes a drop of cum off her lip and kisses her deep. He tastes himself in her mouth but there's hardly any recognition for it. He doesn’t care enough to be disgusted about it, nothing about kissing her is disgusting.

“You’re perfect,” He slips his tongue into her mouth, tugging her up to be laying on top of him. “Wanna make you feel good,” He moves his head, kissing down her neck.

Talia lets out a noise of confirmation, “please,” she whines burying her fingers against his scalp. From the awkward angle he’s at, he slips her pants down past her ass, her underwear at the same time.

He rubs a finger over her wet hole, teasing it. She lets out a stifled whimper, burying her face further into Oscar’s chest. He slides the finger in slowly, watching the bits of her face that he can see intently. She’s shying away, forcing her face away from his view.

“You’re all shy now?” He teases, massaging one of her breasts with his palm. She doesn’t reply, just keens on him, desperate for more. He pushes his finger fully in, sliding it in and out. “Look at me, pretty,” He kisses her forehead, nudging the spot with his nose.

She reluctantly looks up before snuggling into his neck. It’s a drastic difference from how she was only minutes earlier. He pushes a second finger in, knowing her all too well that she’s needy for it. She groans, scraping her teeth down along his shoulder.

He groans, throwing his head back. He knows what he’s doing, not needing to even look. He pushes in and out, deeper and just as controlled. Her walls tighten around him, her wetness slicking down over his palm and around his wrist. His thumb joins in, rubbing along her clit.

“Oz,” it comes out all jagged and breathy. “Fuck- need to,” She can’t finish her sentences at this point, pushed so close to the edge. He gives her a whisper of allowance, his breath hot against her ear.

“Come for me,” He instructs her, his thumb applying more pressure as he feels a gush of wetness spill down his occupied hand. She’s gasping, panting for air when it happens. His body is still trying to regain full senses from the weed, barely noticing how deep her nails are digging into his sides, leaving red crescent moons into his skin.

Once she’s come down from her high, Talia rolls onto the space next to him on the bed. They watch each other, laying on their sides as they share the joint. They puff smoke at each other, laughing over absolutely nothing.

“You’re staying tonight?” Whether it's a statement or a question is unsure, just how she intended. Oscar cranes his head to where he can see the sun is peeking out and beginning to set.

“Yeah, I’ll stay right here,” He hums as the two of them both nod off to a hazy, stoned induced sleep.

#formula 1 #formula one #f1 #f1 x reader #oscar piastri #oscar piastri smut #oscar piastri x original character

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makeyoumine69 · 11 months ago

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Flesh n' Bones | Hospital AU (INTRO)

PAIRING: Doctor!Patrick Bateman x gn!Nurse!Reader

SUMMARY: My name is Patrick Bateman. I'm 27 years old. I live in the American Gardens building on West 81st Street in New York City. I work as a surgeon at St. Pierce's Hospital—one of the most upscale medical centers in Manhattan—which happens to be owned by my father. And even though I hate my job, sometimes I can find a little bit of fun in making the experience of my patients in the hospital really unforgettable. Not to mention the dozens of missing nurses who definitely regretted crossing the threshold of St. Pierce's Hospital, but who cares—I was the best thing that ever happened to them.

CONTAINS: Swearing, medical procedures, evil plans, gaslighting, pain, blood and injury, interns & internships, power dynamics, flirting, perversion, pet names, Patrick Bateman's POV.

WORDS: 2.4k

A/N: Hello my dears! This story is based on Hospital AU by @peepoo79! Since the first day I saw her Hospital AU comic I was obsessed with this idea so I decided to write it! Since I am not a doctor myself, some things might not be that accurate to medical standards, but I am always open to critique. As always, I hope you enjoy it! Also, many thanks to @mothhmannn for the amazing Patrick art!

LINKS: [MASTERLIST]; [AO3].

October 28, 1987.

Today started so shitty that I didn't even want to go to work, but how could I? I was a fucking surgeon who was supposed to save lives, and when I finally arrived at St. Pierce's Hospital, several nurses crowded around me and started bitching about some shitty stuff I didn't even care about.

"Dr. Bateman, your intern has arrived and is waiting for you in your office," one of the nurses said, handing me a folder of papers. "They seem to be very shy, so please treat them right."

Scowling, I took the papers and nodded. "Uh…Thank you."

Without further ado, I walked past another nurse and down the long corridors, avoiding all of my coworkers as I tried to concentrate on the music blaring from my Walkman headphones. Stopping at the door to my office, I made sure my hair was neatly slicked back before opening the door and stepping inside to see a beautiful person sitting in the chair. The blue medical uniform fit them so well that I even wanted to compliment them, but I stopped myself and just offered them a handshake instead.

"Well, hello there, my name is Dr. Bateman," I smiled and continued to examine my new plaything. "It's...uh...nice to see some young blood in our hospital these days."

You were embarrassed so quickly, probably from such a warm welcome, which was more of an exception for me than a regular thing.

"Thank you, Dr. Bateman...it's an honor to be your intern," you replied politely, trying to hide your nervousness as your hands visibly shook. "This hospital is so...amazing! Literally everything I have seen so far is amazing...including this office!"

The office did look luxurious. Everything screamed wealth and prestige, including the wooden desk and a high-end clock on it, the way you looked at the white leather couch in the corner of the room probably sent shivers down your spine, and somehow I really hoped it did.

"So...when can we start?" You asked as you watched me flip through your portfolio, my face stoic, blank, and absolutely unreadable.

As I stopped flipping through the documents and frowned to add some tension between us, I looked at you stealthily out of the corners of my eyes, and when I saw you chewing on your lower lip, I smiled in wicked satisfaction, but that smile never reached my eyes.

"It's very inspiring that you're so eager to get started," I said, placing several pages on the desk, then picking up my Montblanc pen to make some notes. "I see you've been studying pretty well...considering your grades."

Another shy chuckle fell from your lips at my words. "Oh, I did my best," you replied, settling more comfortably in your chair. "Although I didn't really want to reflect on my college years."

"Why?" I asked, writing down all the personal information I could get from your file, including your address, phone number, blood type...

"It was..." your voice wavered and you paused, causing me to look up at you again. "...hard as hell."

"As it should be. Our jobs require hard work as we carry a huge responsibility on our shoulders," I grinned, closing the folder before I could see the name of the college. "So where did you study exactly?"

Just as you were about to answer, a loud knock on the door rang through the office and I couldn't help but grumble in anger.

Can I have a break, for fuck's sake!

"Come in," I almost barked, my attention shifting away from you as I saw a nurse - one of the hottest hardbodies in our hospital - walk in. "Courtney? What happened?"

"Dr. Bateman..." She walked over to my desk, completely ignoring your presence.

"Yes, Courtney?" My patience was about to explode if she didn't answer right away.

"I know you told us not to bother you with non-emergent cases, but other surgeons are busy," she stammered as our gazes met, her blue eyes seeming to brighten even more. "We have a girl whose hand is so full of broken glass, can you please examine her?"

I sighed before glancing quickly at you, a little impressed that you still hadn't said a word. "Does she have insurance? How old is she?"

"Uh," Courtney hiccuped, looking at the patient's medical card. "I checked her insurance, it's valid and... she's nineteen."

"Nineteen?" I replied, suddenly feeling excited. "Well, I think this can be a good start for your internship. What do you think?"

Courtney seemed to finally notice that we were not alone, her plump lips pursed back into a thin line, and I really wanted to laugh at her reaction, but I told myself to stay professional.

"I'm ready when you are, Dr. Bateman," your suddenly confident voice sounded so challenging that it struck a chord in my chest and brought back a long forgotten feeling of thrill. "I'm sure we'd make a great team under your guidance."

How sweet.

I managed to hold back puke at such a silly, saccharine statement. It reminded me of the cliché every doctor used whenever someone asked them why they chose to work in a hospital.

'Oh, we want to save people's lives! And we're not doing it because doctors have almost the highest salaries in the country!'

I grinned insistently, reveling in my own sense of superiority. "All right then," I stood up and put on my doctor's coat over my custom-made scrubs with my initials on them. "Courtney, give the medical card to the intern."

The woman froze in shock. "But...but I thought I would assist you..."

I rolled my eyes as I checked myself in the mirror, adjusting the collar of my scrubs and pulling up the sleeves a bit to reveal my Rolex. "I think I made it very clear that your help won't be needed this time.”

If we were alone, I would probably just boff her before doing my work and that would help me get rid of her until the next time, but hell no, now I had a pain in the ass. And why should I have to teach an intern when I didn't even ask for one?

Meanwhile, you were waiting for me at the door, holding a medical card to your chest as if Courtney or I were about to snatch it from your hands. After I was completely satisfied with my appearance, I pinned my ID badge to my chest and walked to the door, trying not to stare too much at Courtney's ass while she was doing something at my desk that I never really bothered to know.

"You know what," I stopped suddenly before leaving. "Wait for me here," the blonde nurse turned to look at me, still bent over the table. "We'll discuss your new assignment."

A few minutes later, we finally entered the Surgery Division, and since you were a newbie here, I had to guide you all the way, telling you some things from time to time, and at some point I realized that I didn't really hate it, because I could blather on about being a super professional surgeon, and this whole place being mine.

Just like the whole hospital.

"I think this is our ward," I muttered and opened the door to let you in. " C'mon, don't be shy." I pushed you forward a bit before closing the door behind you.

The patient—a young red-haired girl with big green eyes whose tight top stuck to her chest so that her nipples poked out—looked at us the moment we entered the ward.

"Oh, finally," she mumbled in sheer annoyance, her right hand covered in blood-stained bandages. "I was beginning to think everyone had forgotten about me."

Still nervous, you cleared your throat and quickly looked down at the medical card. "Sorry for the long wait, Miss...Miss Ray," you managed to smile, even though you looked like a patient who was afraid to get treatment, but not her, "My name is (y/n) and this is Dr. Bateman, he's one of the best surgeons in this hospital."

One of the best?

Your slightly incorrect comment made me furrow my brow, but in the next second I was smiling seductively at the girl whose scrutinizing look I couldn't miss. She was pretty attractive, hell, just the fact that she wasn't wearing a bra made her attractive.

With practiced ease, I put on medical gloves after washing my hands very meticulously. Then I glanced at the patient's medical card, not taking it in my hands, but letting you hold it for me.

"Can I take a look?" I finally asked, taking a seat next to the examination table and putting the mask on. Carefully I began to unfold the bandages, the little whimpering the girl made gave me undeniable pleasure. "Well, that doesn't look too bad," I said when I could finally see the wound, and several pieces of glass had sunk quite deep into her flesh. "How did you manage that?"

The girl blushed as I began to examine her forearm, moving higher up to her shoulder, though it wasn't really necessary. I just loved how soft her skin was, as much as I could tell by feeling it through the elastic material of my gloves.

"I...I accidentally broke the mirror." She replied, her breathing uneven and her pulse quickening as I took a moment to check her. "My name is Liza, by the way."

I chuckled charmingly before turning to look at you, as you stood behind my back, watching my work very intently. "Can you bring me forceps? And...a scalpel?"

"Scalpel?" You replied a little confused.

"Yes," I confirmed and repositioned Liza's arm for better access. "And I'll also need a suture kit."

The girl tensed at my words that I would need a scalpel. "Is it...necessary?"

"Hmm?" I hummed, asking her a silent question while you busied yourself with preparing the instruments.

"A scalpel...are you going to make an incision?" Liza asked, giving me a pleading glare, her fear was palpable in the air and I couldn't help but savor it.

"I just want all the instruments to be close by in case I have a need for them, that's all. Now please relax." I murmured this with fake sympathy before resuming the examination, pressing down on one of the shards and making Liza whimper. "Shh, it's okay."

The redhead frowned in pain. "It hurts...doctor...it hurts so much!"

When I heard you return, I removed my fingers from the wound. "All right, no nerve damage and that's good." I smiled, obviously lying, my hand was already extended, ready to take the forceps.

"Your forceps, doctor," the way you said 'doctor' made my eyes glow with a mischievous spark. "Clean and sterilized, just like the scalpel and suture kit."

"Very well," I replied, feeling a chill in the metal in my hand. "Put them here," I tapped the spot on the examination table, wondering how you would do that. "And where's your mask?"

Confused, you stuttered. "Oh...yeah...sorry," you mumbled in embarrassment before putting on a mask. "I'm still a little nervous."

Liza knitted her eyebrows in a skeptical way that almost made me burst out laughing.

Okay, now I'm really starting to like this.

"Don't worry, my pill fairy," I watched you place a metal tray with instruments on the spot I showed you. "It's your first day in the hospital...it's...always a little nerve wracking."

As soon as I said it, you stopped in your tracks, and even though your face was covered by the mask, I was pretty sure you were so damn embarrassed that I was going to burn my finger off your cheek. You didn't make any comments though, which made me a little frustrated, but I didn't show it, I took the forceps more comfortably in my hand and began to remove the broken glass from Liza's shaky arm. The way I used the instruments was always mesmerizing - a work of art - as some nurses said, including Courtney, but today I was trying my best because I wanted to impress you. Shard by shard, I took them all out without causing any pain, something I usually couldn't find anything to be proud of.

"Done," I muttered, throwing the last piece of glass into the steel bow. "You took it so bravely."

The redhead smiled tiredly, trying not to look down at her hand. "Thank you, Doctor."

"You're welcome, sweetheart," I allowed you to clean the wound with the antiseptic and dab it with a swab. "It's my job, after all. Now, (y/n), can you please show me how you were taught to make stitches?"

"Of course, Dr. Bateman," you replied without hesitation, and this kind of obedience seemed to become my personal drug.

Standing up, I took a moment to admire how your uniform accentuated all of your curves, especially the roundness of your ass and the arch of your hips.

Shit, maybe I shouldn't have let Courtney stay in my office?

With these thoughts I leaned against the white wall and took off my mask as I suddenly felt a strong urge to smoke, luckily I still had the box of cigars my father had brought me from Cuba. I imagined inhaling the sharp scent of snuff when Liza's sudden whimper pulled me out of my trance.

"Can I have an anesthetic?" She asked, squirming in her place as she watched you prepare a suture kit.

"Just a local one," I muttered, a bit annoyed. "That will be enough. (Y/n), what should you do before using anesthesia?"

My question made you freeze. "Ask the patient about any allergies?"

"Right, but in this case you can find all the information on the medical card," I took off the gloves and took the card in my hands. "Well, I don't see anything that would prevent us from using bupivacaine."

As Liza sighed with relief and I watched you take a syringe, I had to admit that I was amazed at how carefully and attentively you worked.

Maybe you're not gonna get kicked out of the hospital as fast as I thought.

P.S. Thank you for reading until the end! I don’t have a taglist. You can follow my side blog @makeyoumineagain and turn on notifications to know when I update!

#american psycho #patrick bateman x reader #patrick bateman imagine #patrick bateman #patrick bateman x female reader #patrick bateman x you #slasher x reader #slashers x reader #slasher x you #slasher smut #patrick bateman smut #patrick bateman headcanon #christian bale smut #christian bale x reader #patrick bateman reader #christian bale #patrick bateman imagines #patrick bateman x male reader

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emonaculate · 3 months ago

Text

Looking Out for You

❄ Author's Note: No way! Em has the inspiration to write something? I did not forget about "S?ABT" it is my baby and I am currently revising some of the upcoming chapters I just wanted it to be more fleshed out before posting any updates. Anyways let me know what you guys think of this I am really proud of it and I love hearing your comments!

❄ Synopsis: Yn is grappling with the humbling experience of being gifted kid burnout, burdened by family turmoil, and the weight of her inner demons. Just before her senior year of high school, she's reluctantly roped into volunteering as a counselor and teacher at a winter camp. There, she formally meets Gojo Satoru—an aggravatingly handsome hockey player with an ego to match his skill, all charm, smirks, and know-it-all energy. Y/n doesn’t realize that beneath Gojo’s confident exterior lies a storm of his own—wounds he’s hidden just as deeply as she has.

The vinyl seats of the cruiser stuck to the back of Y/n’s thighs like a second skin, the plastic creaking every time she shifted her weight. Outside, the early winter evening painted the town in a watery gray haze—frosted windows, crooked streetlights buzzing faintly with static, and snow half-melted into dirty slush along the curb. Somewhere nearby, a dog barked like it had something to prove. Just when she thought her day couldn't get any fucking worse.

Y/n sat in the back of the cop car like it was routine—elbows propped on her knees, chin resting in her hand, face unreadable. The flashing lights had long since been turned off, but the phantom red-and-blue still pulsed behind her eyelids like an annoying screensaver. Across the windshield, her mother stood stiff in her department store coat, arms crossed tight over her chest like she was holding herself together just barely. Tired didn’t even begin to cover it. Her voice was low, tense, but Y/n couldn’t make out the words—just saw her lips move with the careful precision of someone trying not to snap. Again.

Next to her, the officer on duty leaned against the car door, one hand on his belt like he wanted this over ten minutes ago. He barely nodded, barely blinked. The third figure was who Y/n assumed to be the unfortunate owner of what she considered her latest masterpiece. Y/n’s gaze drifted lazily to her reflection in the scratched plastic partition, eyes half-lidded with indifference. Deep plum-colored shadows clung beneath her dull, hickory eyes—like bruises left behind by too many sleepless nights. Her hair, once long, uniform, and silken black, now barely grazed her shoulders in uneven layers, dyed a moody shade of wine that clashed with who she used to be.

If someone had shown this version of her to the girl she was five years ago—bright-eyed, polished, full of promise—she would’ve laughed in disbelief. Or cried. Maybe both. Y/n was snapped out of her daze by the creak of the cruiser door swinging open. Cold air rushed in, biting at her cheeks, but she barely flinched. Standing there, silhouetted against the dim streetlights, was the same officer who’d had the unfortunate task of throwing her into the back seat to begin with.

Her gaze drifted up to his face, and a slow, amused smirk tugged at the corner of her mouth. There it was—a purplish bruise blooming across his cheekbone, just below his eye. Sloppy, but satisfying. She remembered the sharp jolt of her elbow making contact, the brief moment of chaos before they’d finally wrestled her into cuffs. Worth it.

“Good evening, officer,” she drawled, voice smooth with mock sweetness.

He didn’t answer, just leveled her with a look that said he was far too tired for her games. She stepped out of the car with practiced ease, shoulders relaxed, like she wasn’t the reason this entire scene had been set in motion. Y/n’s flicker of satisfaction vanished just as quickly as it had come—snuffed out by the sharp, familiar sting of her mother’s voice slicing through the cold air. Her full name. Said with that deadly, no-nonsense cadence that mothers seem to master from the moment they give birth to you. The kind of tone that meant no amount of smirking or silent rebellion was going to save her this time.

Y/n’s eyes flicked away from the officer, her smirk slipping into something colder. She shoved her hands deep into the frayed pockets of her oversized, black, ripped pants—the loose fabric hanging dangerously low on her hips. Her boots crunched softly against the snow-dusted pavement as she started toward her mother, each step weighted with the kind of practiced indifference only a teenage girl with a long list of mistakes could wear well. She didn’t walk fast. Didn’t look sorry. And she sure as hell didn’t plan on explaining herself.

"Yes, mother dearest?" Y/n’s voice dripped with sarcasm, a sickly sweet lilt curling off her tongue as she came to a lazy stop in front of her mother and the elderly shop owner. Her smile was insincere, daring.

Evangeline forced one of her own in return, but the twitch in her eye betrayed her composure. She was clearly clenching her jaw, holding back the thousand thoughts that must have been running through her head—none of them kind. Y/n knew the look well. She'd seen it every time she'd managed to sabotage yet another one of her mother’s carefully cultivated professional relationships. It was starting to become a pattern.

"I believe you owe Mr. Soraoka an apology," Evangeline said evenly, though her voice was tight. "For breaking into his store and destroying his property. You are very, very lucky he’s chosen not to press charges."

Y/n rolled her eyes, slow and deliberate, then turned to the elderly man beside her. He looked as soft as he sounded—kindness etched into the wrinkles of his face, his hands folded gently in front of him.

"Nonsense," Mr. Soraoka said with a chuckle, waving dismissively at Evangeline as if she'd just suggested something absurd. "After all you did for me when my wife passed, helping me manage the will and keep the shop… It’s the least I can do, Mrs. Kashiwagi."

Evangeline froze—her lips parted slightly, like she might correct him. But before she could speak, it was too late. Y/n's eyes glittered with something venomous as her smirk sharpened.

"Oh, you haven’t heard, sir?" she said lightly, though the bitterness was unmistakable. "She got remarried. I’m the only Kashiwagi now. Especially since he’s gone. Guess it’s up to me to carry on the family legacy—"

She didn’t finish. The words caught in her throat, burning like acid as the emotion snuck up on her—uninvited, unwelcome. Her voice faltered, and she blinked fast, hoping it would stop the tears before they had the audacity to fall. Not here. Not in front of her mother.

Especially not in front of her.

"M’going to the car," Y/n mumbled, voice raw and small as she rubbed at her eyes with the back of her hand. Without waiting for a response, she turned on her heel and walked away, ignoring the sound of her mother calling her back.

Evangeline stood still, her shoulders stiff as her daughter disappeared toward the car. Her lips pressed into a hard line, then softened with a sigh—quiet and resigned. She turned back to Mr. Soraoka, offering a hollow laugh that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

"Teenagers…" she muttered. "One minute they’re crawling all over you, and the next they wish you didn’t exist."

Mr. Soraoka didn’t laugh. He watched her carefully, taking in the exhaustion beneath her polished exterior. Her beauty was undeniable—graceful, poised, but weathered by years of silent struggle. It was obvious to anyone who looked close enough: the past four years had worn her thin. The sudden loss of her husband. A daughter spiraling in grief and rebellion. Balancing her career as a foreigner running her own law firm in Tokyo—none of it had been easy.

"Thank you again," she said after a pause, her voice gentler now, bowing slightly in respect. "For not pressing charges. She’s… she’s a good girl. She’s just been through a lot."

Mr. Soraoka nodded slowly, his expression shifting from solemn to certain.

"Actually," he said, tone suddenly firmer, "I do have one request."

Evangeline blinked, caught off guard. There was something knowing in his eyes now—something resolute. He’d seen this before: a teenager so full of anger they couldn’t feel anything else. A family worn thin. A mother doing her best to hold everything together. And he remembered how a place, a purpose, had once helped another broken-hearted Kashiwagi find peace.

"I know exactly what she needs," Mr. Soraoka said, quietly but with conviction.

"It worked for her father. Why not her?"

Y/n lay sprawled on her bed, eyes fixed on the faded constellation stickers scattered across her ceiling—little glimmers of soft green glowing faintly in the dark. They were uneven, a little crooked, their edges peeling with age, but to her, they were perfect. Each one a frozen moment, a quiet echo from a simpler time. She remembered exactly how they got there. It was a memory etched into her mind with sharp clarity—one she often revisited when everything else felt like it was slipping out of focus.

She’d been a wide-eyed little girl, full of wonder and stubborn ideas. And she had begged her father to put the stars up—despite his initial protests about how tacky they would look compared to his carefully curated, traditional Japanese decor. Shoji screens, minimalist calligraphy, warm cedarwood tones… and glow-in-the-dark plastic stars? Absolutely not.

But her father, Harukemi, caved, as he always did when it came to his baby girl. His only baby girl. She remembered sitting on his broad, heavily tattooed shoulders as they worked together to scatter the stickers across the ceiling. Her tiny fingers peeled each one carefully while he guided her from below, one large hand pointing to where each star should go, the other steadying her.

"Why do constellations even exist?" she had asked in that childlike wonder voice that always made him flash his dimple-filled smile.

He hummed thoughtfully before answering, as if plucking the story from the stars themselves.

"They’re people who chose not to be reincarnated," Harukemi said, voice baritone and tender. "Because they wanted to stay close to the one they were fated to love in this life."

Y/n had gone quiet, thinking hard. Then—

"But what if someone chooses to be reincarnated… and their soulmate doesn’t?"

He chuckled, a deep, rumbling sound that vibrated in her small frame. Nothing got past his little girl; her big brain definitely came from Eve.

"Then they become brand new galaxies," he answered, after a short moment of thought. "Endless and vast—so they can keep searching, lifetime after lifetime, until they find each other again."

She placed the final sticker—an uneven little crescent moon—before he gently lifted her from his shoulders and cradled her close to his chest. Warm. Safe. Home. The creak of her bedroom door pulled Y/n abruptly from the safety of her thoughts. She scowled instinctively, already prepared to snap at whoever had dared to interrupt her rare moment of peace. Her expression fell flat the second she saw who it was.

Kiara. Of course. Her fifteen-year-old stepsister stood awkwardly in the doorway, refusing to make eye contact, as if she already knew she was unwelcome.

"Dad cooked, if you're hungry." Kiyara muttered, voice low and uncertain.

Y/n narrowed her eyes, her tone flat and dismissive. "Heard. Now leave."

Kiara hesitated for a moment, her jaw twitching with something unsaid. Then she turned on her heel with a muttered comment under her breath—inaudible but definitely laced with attitude—before slamming the door behind her. Y/n didn’t even flinch.

Instead, she picked up her phone and scrolled aimlessly through her gallery, her thumb pausing on every photo of her father. There were dozens—maybe hundreds. Him beaming behind her as she skated on wobbly legs at the ice rink. The two of them in front of a massive lion enclosure at the zoo. A blurry shot of them eating cotton candy on a roller coaster platform. Them being at the dance studio he taught regularly at. Her sitting on the back of his dangerous motorcycle, holding a box of groceries like it was some grand mission.

They weren’t just photos. They were proof. Little frozen frames of a world where she felt understood. Where someone looked at her and saw her—not a problem to be fixed or a responsibility to pass off. Sometimes she wondered if he was the only person in the whole world who ever truly got her... and now he was gone.

After a while of more bed-rotting, Y/n forced herself up and threw on a random oversized graphic t-shirt and left her room to find something to eat. Like hell she'd eat anything made by that sorry attempt at replacing her father. Instead, she slipped down the hall toward the kitchen, her socks silent against the hardwood floor. The house was too quiet—eerily so. Like it was holding its breath.

She opened the fridge, pulled out a crisp Fuji apple, and set it on the counter. The dull slice of the kitchen knife against the cutting board was rhythmic, familiar. She reached for a slice, but stopped mid-motion. Her eyes caught on something. Or rather—the absence of something. The key. The old brass key that always hung on the tiny hook in the dining room alcove, just beside the display shelf with her dad’s tea set. The key to his study. His sanctuary. It was gone. Y/n’s heart skipped. No. No one touched that room. No one was supposed to.

Her limbs moved before her thoughts could catch up, leaving the apple slices forgotten on the cutting board as she stormed down the hallway, anxiety building in her throat like bile. Her breathing quickened. The world narrowed. The door to his study—a door that had remained sealed since the day of the funeral—was cracked open. Y/n froze for just a moment. Her stomach dropped. Then she pushed it open. Empty. The room was empty.

The shelves that once held her father’s meticulously organized books, his framed photographs and tattoo designs, his incense burner and ink brushes—gone. His desk, where he spent hours scribbling in his worn leather journal, empty. The rug they used to sit on when she’d draw while he worked—rolled up. Even the scent of sandalwood and old paper had vanished, replaced with sterile emptiness.

And then came the sound. It tore out of her chest, raw and guttural—a sharp, shattering cry that cracked through the silence like glass meeting concrete. Not loud. Just devastating. She stood frozen in the center of the hollow room, fists clenched, nails digging crescents into her palms. Her grief was no longer silent. Then came the footsteps. And around the corner, as if summoned by her pain, came him...her mother's new husband, Evan. Holding a box.

Her father’s box. She saw it before she saw the rest of him. The edge of her dad’s favorite scarf hung out from the top, crushed beneath God knows what else—loose papers, a ceramic pen holder, maybe even the sketch of her he kept by the window.

Y/n felt like she was going to explode. There were not enough crude words in the entire world that would help express what exactly she was feeling in the moment.

"What the hell do you think you’re doing?"

Her voice wasn’t loud—but it was sharp, jagged. Evan (the step-father in question) froze mid-step, eyes widening for a second. He looked ridiculous standing there with a cardboard box of memories he had no right to touch.

"Y/n, your mother and I—"

"Don’t. Don’t you dare say her name right now." Her voice wavered slightly, but the fury was taking over, swallowing the ache like a firestorm.

"This was his space. This—this is all I have left of him!"

The older man’s mouth opened, then closed again. He looked down at the box in his hands as if just realizing the weight of what he was holding. It appeared that he was mentally weighing the options of pissing off the angst teenage ticking time bomb or upset his wife. Evan had never been a strong-willed man; he was rather timid in all aspects of his life and preferred to stay out of the limelight whenever possible. How he managed to pull a woman like Evangeline was beyond him.

"Put it down. Now." Y/n stepped forward, eyes blazing.

“Put it down.”

Y/n’s voice trembled, not from fear—but from fury. Her fists were clenched, her entire body taut like a rubber band stretched too tight.

“Put. It. Down.”

Evan didn’t move. He adjusted his grip on the box instead, standing a little taller. “Y/n, this stuff doesn’t belong in a shrine anymore. It’s been four years—your mom and I agreed it was time to clear the space.”

Y/n’s breath caught in her throat.

“You mean erase him.” She sneered at the man.

He exhaled through his nose, clearly trying to stay calm. “That’s not what this is.”

But she was already shaking her head.

“You don’t get to decide when I let him go. You don’t even get to touch his things.”

His jaw tightened. “Y/n—”

“You moved into his house. Slept in his bed. Fucked and married her. You don’t give a damn about what he meant to me!”

That’s when his composure slipped. Y/n had a really bad habit of getting under people's skin and making them feel as ugly as she felt most days on the inside.

“You’ve had four years to grieve, Y/n. How much more do you need?” He let out a sharp, bitter laugh.

The silence that followed was deafening. Even he looked like he hadn’t meant to say it. His face paled instantly, regret flickering across his features like a crack in glass. But the damage was already done.

Y/n’s eyes went wide—then narrowed into a sharp, unforgiving glare. Her grief ignited like gasoline hitting open flame. Without thinking, she lunged forward, her hands grabbing at the box, shoving him backwards, sending some of her father’s belongings tumbling to the ground.

“You selfish—soulless—bastard! Spineless piece of shit” she screamed, shoving him again.

He stumbled, catching himself on the wall, just as Y/n kicked the box across the hall. The contents spilled—a watch, a framed photo of her as a toddler, an old Japanese poetry book. Pieces of a life that didn’t belong to him. Before she could do more, a sharp voice cut through the chaos.

“Y/N!”

Evangeline’s heels clicked furiously across the floor, phone still clutched in hand, freshly off yet another business call. Her expression was tight and tired, but her eyes were blazing.

“What is wrong with you?”

Y/n turned to face her, chest heaving, throat raw.

“Me? What’s wrong with me? Is everyone in this fucking house insane?” Y/n hissed in frustration.

And then it all spilled out—everything she’d been holding in for years.

“You wanna talk about what’s wrong? Let’s start with the fact that you haven’t looked at me since Dad died. You checked out! Mentally, emotionally—everything. And you only got your life together after he showed up!” Y/n jabbed a finger toward her stepfather.

“That’s not true,” Evangeline snapped, her voice dangerously low.

“Oh, please! You left me to drown in this damn house with the ghosts of yesterday, and now you want to punish me for acting out? Maybe if you were actually around, I wouldn’t have turned into this mess you keep trying to fix!”

“You barely passed this semester, Y/n! You don’t even try anymore!” Evangeline’s voice rose with every word, “You walk around looking like you haven’t seen a mirror in weeks! You’re mean, cruel to everyone who tries to care. You shoplift! You vandalize shops! You stopped ice skating—you were good, Y/n. You don't dance anymore You could’ve gone somewhere with it! But you gave up on everything.”

Y/n’s mouth fell open in disbelief. No way. No way her mother could be this delusional. What the fuck do you think happens when you leave a freshly fourteen year old whose father just died alone to process grief?

“You think I gave up? Maybe I just didn’t have anyone left to fight for. Maybe I was too busy surviving in a house where my mother pretended I didn’t exist!”

Evangeline’s eyes burned with unshed tears. She needed to calm down; this is not how she wanted this conversation to go. It wasn't time yet.

“I was grieving too—”

“Bullshit!” Y/n screamed, “You didn’t grieve! You buried yourself in your job and him, and pretended Dad never existed! You left me behind. You weren’t there. Not once. Not when I needed you. Not when I cried for him at night. Not when I stopped eating. Not when I begged for someone to see me—you weren’t there!”

Evangeline’s voice cracked with something low and furious; to hell with trying to spare feelings and save face. Clearly, Y/n only understood when people stooped to her level. She was just as headstrong as Harukemi, only less endearing.

“He might have been your dad…” Evangeline started, teeth clenched,“…but he was my husband. I lost my husband. And now I’m stuck with a horrible, entitled child who blames the whole world for her pain.”

Silence. Time stopped. And then, slowly, Y/n's expression hardened into something unreadable. Her lips parted—and the words came out like venom.

“It should have been you.”

Evangeline went still. The color drained from her face. Her mouth opened slightly in shock—but no words came. Only silence. Cold, sharp, final. Then, as if something inside her snapped, her face shut down. Emotionless. Cold.

“You’ll be attending Tengen’s Star on Ice Camp,” she said flatly, “It’s two months. After that, you’ll finish your final year of high school. Then—when you turn eighteen—you can leave. Go wherever the hell you want. I don’t care anymore. I'm done.”

She turned and walked away. Her pathetic husband followed right behind her, calling after her, but to no avail. Kiyara, who had witnessed the closing remarks, looked at her stepsister with a sad expression on her face as she bent down and picked up the items that had fallen out of the box. Y/n watched the girl with an unreadable expression as Kiyara finally sat the box down in front of her before making a quiet exit out of the hall.

Y/n stood there, still breathing hard, her chest tight, her throat raw. The box lay at her feet—scattered memories of a better time. She didn't cry. She just stood there. Alone. Again.

The weeks leading up to Y/n’s departure bled together in cold silence. She spent most of her time barricaded in her room, headphones in, lights off, buried beneath thick blankets like a fortress. When the walls felt too tight or the air too stale, she’d slip out unnoticed, making her way to the same ice rink she’d frequented as a child.

She never brought her skates. She just watched. Children laughed as they stumbled on the ice, couples clung to one another for balance, and seasoned skaters sliced across the frozen surface like it was second nature. It should have brought her joy—the sound of blades scraping ice, the smell of hot chocolate, the familiar hum of music from the old speakers—but now, it just felt like another reminder of everything she'd lost. Of everything that had changed.

No words had been exchanged between her and Evangeline since that day. Not a glance. Not a knock on the door. Nothing. The house was too big for that kind of silence, but somehow, they managed. And that, in itself, said everything. It was clear where the two stood now. No bridges left to burn. Just ash and distance.

Y/n told herself she was fine with that; she was seventeen now, anyway, only a couple of months left, and she could go wherever she wanted. Finally free. Finally unburdened. She could leave soon—really leave—and never come back. No more suffocating conversations. No more sideways looks. No more pretending. No regrets.

At least, that’s what she whispered to herself as she stared at the rink through fogged glass, heart aching in a way she couldn’t quite name. Because grief had a funny way of hiding itself in the quiet. And loneliness? It was best disguised as freedom. The night of her departure arrived cloaked in a thick, still quiet—the kind that seemed to hang in the air like a breath being held.

Y/n stood in the middle of her dimly lit room, zipping up the second of two small duffle bags. She hadn’t bothered to organize them with any real thought. A few sweaters, worn jeans, a couple pairs of shoes, and the same black hoodie she always wore when she didn’t want to be noticed. That was enough. It wasn’t like she cared to impress anyone at the camp. She wasn't going to make friends. She wasn’t going to start over.

She was just… going. She threw the bags near her bedroom door and sat down on the edge of her bed, the mattress creaking slightly under her weight. Her eyes flicked up to the ceiling, where the faded glow-in-the-dark constellation stickers still clung stubbornly to the plaster like ghosts of her childhood. They didn’t shine like they used to.

She leaned over to grab the crumpled scarf from her nightstand—the one that had belonged to her father. She wasn’t sure when she’d started sleeping with it under her pillow, but the scent had long since faded. Still, her fingers ran over the frayed edge like it might anchor her to something—anything—that felt real.

No one had said goodbye. Evangeline hadn’t even come to her room. Not that she expected her to. Not anymore. Y/n gave one last glance around the space that had once been her whole world before standing up, slipping her duffle straps over her shoulders. As she opened her bedroom door, the hallway light buzzed dimly above her. She didn’t look back. There was nothing left here for her to hold onto.

Just before leaving her room, Y/n paused. Her eyes lingered on the worn pair of ice skates tucked in the corner beneath her bookshelf—dust collecting lightly on the laces, blades dulled from lack of use. She told herself it was pointless to bring them. But her hand reached out anyway. Just in case.

The train platform was quiet, kissed by early morning frost and a sky still painted in faded hues of lavender and silver. Y/n boarded the nearly empty carriage, choosing a window seat near the back where she could stretch out, headphones already looped around her neck.

As the train lurched into motion, the city bled away behind her, tall buildings and traffic slowly giving way to open roads and fields blanketed in snow. They passed through valleys where the sun peeked through clouds, casting golden halos over snow-covered pines. Mountains loomed in the distance, their ridges softened by white drifts, like powdered sugar over a dream.

Snowflakes danced against the windows, soft and slow, like the sky was exhaling. Y/n leaned against the glass, pressing her cheek to the chill. She thumbed through her phone until she found it—the wedding playlist. The one her dad had made for Evangeline all those years ago. An odd mix of Motown classics, begging and pleading R&B (Harukemi's words, not hers), soft jazz, and powerful Japanese ballads her father had adored. She pressed play. Let it wash over her. She didn’t cry. She just... listened. And slowly, the lull of the train and the warmth of the music pulled her into sleep. When she woke, the train had stopped moving. A soft nudge pulled her from her dreams.

“Hey,” a voice said gently. “We’re here. You slept for a while.”

Y/n blinked groggily, squinting against the now-orange glow of the setting sun slanting through the train windows. She turned to find herself not alone, as she had thought. Her head had somehow—and she had no idea how—ended up resting against a stranger’s shoulder. A boy. He wore distressed black jeans, a tattered band tee under a plaid flannel, and a chain hanging from his belt loop. His ears were lined with mismatched silver piercings, and a subtle nose ring curved through his nostril. His shaggy shoulder-length dark brown hair peeked out from under a beanie that looked like it had seen better days. Despite the grunge armor, his expression was soft. Genuinely concerned.

“I—” Y/n scrambled upright, suddenly embarrassed at just how long she had been lying on him. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to—fall asleep—on you.”

He smiled a little, brushing off his shoulder like it was nothing. “It’s alright. You looked tired.”

His voice was calm. Unassuming. Not what she expected. Y/n mumbled a vague “thanks” under her breath, already avoiding eye contact as she grabbed her bags and skates. Her body was stiff from the five-hour nap, her pride even stiffer. She didn’t know what was worse—accidentally sleeping on a stranger or the fact that it had been the best sleep she’d had in months. No point in thinking about it now. She had a camp to survive. The cold bit at Y/n’s cheeks the moment she stepped off the train, her boots crunching into fresh snow that sparkled like crushed diamonds beneath the setting sun. Her breath came out in visible puffs as she took in the scene around her.

Everywhere she looked, groups of late teens and young adults were laughing, hugging, or shouting each other’s names across the platform. Some had clearly been coming to this camp for years—joking like old friends reunited. It was loud, chaotic, and warm in that annoying way that made her feel even more isolated. She kept her distance, clutching the strap of her bag tightly as she walked past them. Her skates were slung over her shoulder, bouncing lightly with every step. Then, her eyes lifted.

Beyond the crowd, the camp stretched out like something from a storybook. Wooden lodges lined with twinkling string lights. Candy cane–striped poles marking the paths. Icicles dripping from rooftops. Flakes of snow gently drifted down in slow spirals from the mountain ranges behind the camp, making the whole place look like a snow globe someone had just shaken. It was... beautiful. Painfully so.

“Still not impressed?”

A hand landed gently on her shoulder. Y/n shivered from the cold feeling of metal touching her exposed skin. Maybe wearing an off-shoulder sweatshirt wasn't the best idea. Just how many rings did one person need to wear on one hand? Y/n turned and met the gentle gaze of the boy from the train. He stood beside her now, lips tilted into a slight half-smile. It was like he was silently telling her to get used to seeing him because he wasn't going anywhere.

“Choso,” he said simply, offering the name like a quiet olive branch.

Y/n gave a small nod. “Y/n.”

He glanced around the camp. “Looks like we’re stuck here for a while.”

She let out a soft exhale through her nose. “Fantastic.”

Before either of them could say more, movement pulled their attention toward the entrance gates of the camp, where a raised wooden stage stood decorated with garlands of evergreen and silver ribbon.

Five figures approached it, stepping up onto the platform, followed closely by none other than Mr. Soraoka himself—his cane tapping lightly against the wood as he smiled at the crowd. Y/n’s eyes flicked to the five people flanking him. They were clearly counselors or returning seniors, dressed more put together than the chaos of everyone else. But one in particular stood out—like an explosion of sunlight on a cloudy day. A tall boy.

His hair was impossibly white—almost the same color as the snow around them—and fluffed out like freshly fallen powder. His skin glowed under the lights with a slight tan, and his eyes, an electric blue, scanned the crowd with practiced ease. Thick-rimmed glasses rested lazily on top of his head, pushed up like he hadn’t decided if he needed them or not.

He wore a baby blue oversized crewneck on it was a small logo belonging to a brand Y/n did could not make out, with a crisp white collared shirt peeking out from underneath the crewneck. The sleeves strained slightly over thick, muscular arms, the kind you wouldn’t expect someone so pretty to have. His legs, despite being mostly covered by mid-length khaki cargo shorts (how was he not cold?), still showcased evidence of a life well-lived—small bandaids, healed scrapes, light bruises like he collected them for fun. And on his feet—classic tan Timberlands, dusted in snow. He was… effortlessly chaotic. And irritatingly eye-catching.

The murmurs of the crowd quieted as Mr. Soraoka stepped to the center of the small wooden stage, the falling snow settling softly on his dark wool coat. Though his age showed in the curve of his spine and the lines around his kind eyes, his voice rang out strong and full of warmth.

“Welcome, welcome, my dear volunteers,” he began, raising his arms wide. “I must say, seeing all of you here so early, so eager to give back… it fills this old heart with joy.”

A soft round of applause rippled through the crowd.

“This camp,” he continued, motioning to the snow-covered grounds behind him, “was founded many years ago by my great-grandfather, Tengen. A man with a wild soul and a heart bigger than this mountain. He believed in the magic of youth, in the gift of joy, and most importantly—in the power of discovery.”

He paused, letting the wind carry his words.

“Tengen’s Star on Ice wasn’t just a winter camp. It was a place for children to find themselves, to build confidence through skill, to make friends who feel like family, and to create memories that last lifetimes.”

All around Y/n, heads nodded in agreement. It was clear—most of these people had lived that magic.

“Many of you were once those wide-eyed kids, bundled in oversized scarves and falling on your faces in the snow,” Mr. Soraoka chuckled, the crowd joining him. “And now look at you. Back here again, this time not as campers, but as guides. Mentors. Counselors. It’s your turn now—to carry the torch, to be the magic for someone else.”

Y/n’s eyes drifted upward, snowflakes catching in her lashes. Something in her chest shifted, uncomfortably so.

“And now,” Mr. Soraoka smiled, “let me introduce the people who have not only walked this path before you—but have practically carved it into the snow.”

He gestured to the five figures lined up beside him.

“First, our head counselors. You’ll report to them with questions, concerns, or if you simply need someone to talk to. Think of them as an extension of me; if they say it.. I said it.”

One by one, they stepped forward.

“Suguru Geto, let's make this break a good one. ” The tall, calm boy with a soft bun gave a graceful bow, hands tucked neatly behind his back. While he appeared kind and sweet, his baggy attire gave a different impression, especially with the piercing through his lip, and the slight condescending look as he gazed down at the crowd.

“Shoko Ieiri, stay out of the infirmary this year, please.” A girl with short, choppy hair and tired but kind eyes waved lazily, cigarette tucked behind one ear despite the posted no-smoking sign nearby.

“Utahime Iori, I'll do my best to not let you all down.” Stern and elegant, she bowed crisply, her dark bob unmoving even in the breeze.

“Nanami Kento,” who seemed to be the only counselor who wore a uniform, even in the snow, nodded sharply. “Follow the rules,” he said flatly. “And we’ll all survive the winter.”

Soft laughter bubbled through the group.

“And finally,” Mr. Soraoka sighed as though preparing himself, “Gojo Satoru.”

So his name was Gojo Satoru. The name fit him oddly. He stepped forward, flashing a blinding smile as he lifted his hands to gesture a peace sign.

“Call me Gojo,” He introduced himself innocently before sticking his tongue out and tugging his oversized baby blue sweater halfway up to reveal a flash of a very well-defined set of abs beneath.

The crowd erupted. Cheers, whoops, and groans of recognition. Utahime muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like a curse. Shoko rolled her eyes. Nanami visibly pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Put your damn shirt down, Satoru,” Suguru sighed, though the corner of his mouth betrayed a smirk.

Gojo obeyed—eventually—and shot the crowd a wink.

Mr. Soraoka let out a deep belly laugh. “If I were twenty years younger, I’d be just like him.”

Then, his eyes scanned the crowd again. Y/n shifted uncomfortably. Something about the look he was giving… And then it happened. The old man’s grin widened.

“This year,” he said, his voice now layered with something impish, “we’re doing things a little differently. In the spirit of growth—and to make this year even more unforgettable—we’re not stopping at five head counselors.”

A hush fell over the crowd, followed by an excited murmur.

“We’ve decided to add one more.”

Cheers. Whispers. A few confused expressions.

“Settle down,” came Nanami’s sharp tone, instantly restoring order.

“Thank you, Kento,” Mr. Soraoka chuckled. Then he straightened, his voice rising with significance.

“I would like to welcome our sixth counselor this year—a new face to some of you, perhaps. But to me… someone I’ve watched grow from a bright-eyed little girl to a force of her own.”

Y/n’s blood ran cold. Oh, no.

“Please welcome… Y/n Kashiwagi. Come on up here, my dear.”

A thousand eyes turned. Y/n froze. She didn’t move. Gojo’s eyebrow arched with intrigue. Choso looked over at her with a flicker of concern.

Mr. Soraoka just smiled warmly. “Don’t be shy now.”

Y/n’s legs felt like lead as she forced one foot in front of the other, the snow crunching softly beneath her boots as she reluctantly made her way toward the stage. The murmurs were like thunder in her ears. She kept her gaze low, wishing she could melt into the ice-covered ground. This had to be his twisted revenge for what she did to his shop. She didn’t belong here. She wasn’t like them. Just as she was about to step up, a sharp voice pierced through the cold air like a dagger.

“Excuse me,” a girl’s voice snapped. “Why is it that some random newcomer gets to be a counselor, but people who’ve attended this camp for years are overlooked?”

A ripple of gasps spread through the crowd like wildfire. More voices rose in agreement.

“Yeah, that’s not fair—”

“She’s never even been a camper—”

“What makes her so special?”

Y/n’s chest tightened as the angry buzz of the crowd grew louder, the warmth in her cheeks turning into a stifling burn. Her breath hitched in her throat. She didn’t know where to look. Her vision blurred. Her heart raced. They were right. They didn’t know her. And they already hated her. She didn’t even see Choso move until his hand engulfed hers—cool, large, steady.

“C’mon,” he said, voice low but firm, pulling her gently but quickly away from the center of attention.

She stumbled for a moment, overwhelmed by the noise, the eyes, the shame. She didn’t like being touched, not really, but this… this wasn’t bad. This was grounding. Her panic softened into a numb daze as Choso guided her down a snow-dusted path toward the staff cabins. They passed rows of tall pine trees, the smell of fresh snow and wood smoke hanging in the air. The camp’s chatter faded behind them, replaced by the quiet crunch of boots in the snow and Y/n’s quickened breathing.

Choso stopped at one of the cabins—dark wood, slightly weathered, icicles dangling from the roof. He pushed the door open and led her inside before shutting it behind them with a soft click. The cabin was small but warm, rustic with a couple of bunk beds, soft blankets folded neatly, and a heater humming softly in the corner. Y/n stood frozen in place, unsure of what to say, what to feel, what to do. She looked up only to find Choso staring at her, one dark brow raised in quiet question. His look wasn’t judgmental—it was curious. Calm. Like he was trying to figure her out, but wouldn’t press if she didn’t want to explain. Y/n felt her hands clench at her sides.

“I didn’t know,” she muttered. “They didn’t tell me. I didn’t ask to be some special sixth counselor or whatever.”

Choso nodded once, slowly. Still silent.

“I just… I didn’t even want to come here.”

Still nothing. His silence was almost irritating. But not in a bad way. More like… it gave her space to think. She hadn't ever experienced such kindness from a total stranger. This camp is way too weird.

Y/n sighed heavily, shoulders sagging. “All I wanted to do was coast through this whole thing. Now everyone knows who I am and already has some stupid ass opinion. So that’s great.”

Choso finally moved. He leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his black long-sleeve, still silent but exuding a calm that somehow made the air less suffocating. She looked at him again. The nose ring. The dark eyes. The face tattoo across the bridge of his nose. The chipped black nail polish on his fingers. The cool indifference in his stance. And yet, he’d pulled her out of the fire without hesitation. She swallowed thickly and turned away, hugging her arms around herself.

“…Thanks,” she said quietly, almost too soft to hear.

Choso shrugged. “Didn’t want you to pass out on me. You looked like you were gonna.”

Y/n huffed a laugh, bitter and embarrassed.

He looked over at her again. “You good?”

She hesitated, then gave a weak nod.

He pushed off the wall and walked toward the door, pausing before opening it. “Take a breath. Let ’em cool off. I’ll be outside.”

Then, without waiting for a response, he stepped out into the snow and shut the door behind him. Y/n was left in the still cabin, her chest slowly rising and falling as she stared at the closed door, wondering why the hell he had helped her. And more importantly—what the hell she was supposed to do now?

Y/n sat on the edge of one of the lower bunks, the tension still coiled tight in her chest like a snake ready to strike. She sighed and raised a hand to her head, running her fingers through the thick, dyed strands of her hair—a nervous tick she hadn’t realized she’d started doing again. But her fingers snagged halfway through.

“Shit,” she muttered, wincing as she tugged them free. Her hair was dry and tangled from weeks of neglect. Frizzy at the ends, dull in color, no real shape. And her hoodie had a paint stain across the sleeve from when she "accidentally" vandalized the corner store with her latest emotional outburst.

For the first time in months… she felt it. That weird gnawing feeling in her gut. Self-consciousness. Y/n stared down at her scuffed boots. The old ones her dad bought her for a winter trip years ago. They were still her favorite, but the soles were half worn. She bit the inside of her cheek and slapped both cheeks lightly.

"Pull it together," she whispered to herself. "They don’t know you. They don’t matter."

But the truth was—they did. Somehow, this place already felt heavier than home. Like the air here carried expectations she hadn’t agreed to meet. That speech, that title, those eyes. All of it made her feel like she’d walked into a play halfway through and someone shoved her on stage without a script. She needed to find Mr. Soraoka. Say something. Apologize, maybe. Explain that she had zero business mentoring anyone when she could barely take care of herself. Offer to clean bathrooms, collect trash, whatever. Anything but being a counselor.

She stood, ready to do just that when the cabin door creaked open. Nanami Kento. Blond hair perfectly parted. Sweater vest and slacks like he stepped out of a different universe. His eyes didn’t just look at her—they evaluated. Cold. Precise. Y/n stiffened under his stare.

“Mr. Soraoka wishes to see you,” he said, voice clipped, professional. “Now. His office. The rest of the counselors will be present.”

The air in the room seemed to drop ten degrees. Y/n opened her mouth to speak—maybe to ask if she had to go, or why everyone was there—but Nanami had already turned on his heel, expecting her to follow. She exhaled shakily and grabbed her hoodie, yanking it straight over her shoulder. No more time for breathing. No more space to think.

Y/n trailed behind Nanami, the silence between them almost comforting in its awkwardness. No lecturing, no side-eyeing, no passive aggressive remarks—just quiet footsteps crunching against the snow-packed gravel path. But even that peace was short-lived. As they passed the last staff cabin, Choso stood waiting. Arms crossed, brows knit together, that ever-present calm demeanor fraying at the edges. The worry on his face was so out of place on someone who looked like he regularly got into fights behind convenience stores.

Y/n’s steps slowed, and before she could overthink it, she gave him a small, reassuring smile. Barely there, but honest. Choso blinked at her in surprise—just for a moment—before giving a subtle nod in return. Maybe… tolerating one person here wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.

Her eyes drifted to the windows they passed. The reflections were not kind. Each glimpse at herself dragged her confidence down another notch. Her hoodie hung awkwardly, the sleeves bunched at the elbows, the frizz of her hair puffing like an unbrushed storm cloud. Dark under-eyes. Dull complexion. Just a mess.

Y/n clicked her tongue in annoyance. “Son of a bitch”

With a few deft motions, she tugged a loose drawstring from her hoodie and quickly pulled her curls into a high puff, gently leaving a few strands out in the front to soften the look and avoid pulling too tight. She tied the paint-stained hoodie around her waist in a practiced swoop, letting it cover the worst of her jeans, then adjusted her off-shoulder sweatshirt so it slouched in a purposeful, grungy kind of way.

She bent to fix the cuffs of her ripped jeans, folding them neatly above her winter boots before retightening the laces with quick, precise tugs. Was this her best? No. But it was the version of her that wouldn’t walk into a room looking like she just lost a bar fight with her bedroom mirror. Nanami paused just before the door to Mr. Soraoka’s office. He glanced back at her—just a second longer than necessary.

“You look… better,” he said, then cleared his throat as if the words tasted weird.

Y/n quirked a brow at him.

“I meant… composed.”

She almost laughed. Almost.

But then, his expression softened, only slightly. His eyes lowered in thought, then lifted to meet hers as he spoke quietly.

“Don’t stress too much.”

It wasn’t warm. It wasn’t casual. But coming from Nanami Kento, who she had already deduced did not hold his tongue by any means at all. That was practically a bear hug of encouragement. Y/n nodded once, then followed him as he pushed open the door. Inside, five pairs of eyes turned toward her.

Mr. Soraoka smiled warmly from behind his old oak desk, surrounded by Gojo, Suguru, Shoko, Utahime, and Nanami—who stepped aside to stand near the back. The room crackled with layered personalities and long-standing familiarity. And then there was Y/n. The outsider. She swallowed hard and kept her chin up. Time to find out what the hell this was all about. Or get on her knees and beg for him to have mercy. Mr. Soraoka’s warm expression brightened the moment Y/n stepped into the room. He sat up straighter in his worn leather chair, the aged wood creaking beneath him as he adjusted himself with purpose.

“Ah, Y/n,” he said, voice honey-smooth with that signature glint of affection only old mentors seemed to master. “I’m glad you came so quickly.”

His voice lowered in tone—not scolding, not stern, but something in between serious and apologetic. “First and foremost, allow me to offer a proper apology. What happened earlier… that introduction, the crowd, the chaos—it wasn’t right to spring that on you the way I did. That should’ve been a private conversation, not some grand stage reveal.”

Y/n blinked slowly but kept her gaze fixed on him, her posture stiff but not defensive anymore. His words—while they didn’t erase what happened—meant something. Enough to let her exhale, even if only just a little.

“I take full responsibility for the discomfort you endured,” he added. “It was unfair.”

She nodded, barely. Just enough. Mr. Soraoka’s eyes crinkled slightly, the smile that returned was softer this time—gentler.

“But I do mean what I said. You are the sixth counselor this year. That’s not a stunt. It’s not some filler role. It’s real.”

Y/n’s brows creased, but she said nothing.

He chuckled quietly. “I knew it from the moment we crossed paths in that shop downtown. You remember—the one you decided to redecorate with spray paint and attitude?”

The tension in her shoulders spiked immediately. Ah. There it was. The first true reaction. Her jaw clenched instinctively, but her gaze faltered—just for a second. The surprise, the unease at that being brought up in front of the others—until she realized… they weren’t reacting.A quick glance confirmed it: confusion colored the faces of Gojo, Suguru, Shoko, Utahime, and even Nanami. They didn’t know. Mr. Soraoka hadn’t told them anything. And that... was a relief.

She opened her mouth, her voice dry as dust. “I think you’re making a mistake.”

His brow rose, but he stayed silent.

“I didn’t come here to inspire anyone or… make kids feel magical or whatever. I’m just here to cruise through winter break and stay out of trouble.” She tried to keep her tone measured, but it wavered on the edges. “That’s it.”

Mr. Soraoka’s smile disappeared—not into disappointment, but into something far heavier. A solemn silence settled over him before he gently waved his hand toward the counselors.

“Would you all give us a moment?” he asked softly.

Gojo made a dramatic sound of disappointment but stood anyway. Suguru sighed, sharing a look with Shoko as they both gave Y/n a final, unreadable glance. Utahime said nothing, her expression unreadable. Nanami was the last to leave, giving Y/n a longer look than the others before quietly stepping out and closing the door behind him. And then it was just them. Mr. Soraoka and Y/n.

The old man leaned forward slightly, fingers lacing together atop the desk. When he spoke, his voice was low.

“You’re right. You didn’t come here for this.”

Y/n didn’t respond. Just stood stiffly.

“But Y/n�� you’re not here by accident. You may not believe in fate, or timing, or second chances. That’s fine. I won’t try to change that today. But I will tell you this: I see something in you. The kind of something that Tengen dreamed this camp would uncover in people. Even if they don’t see it in themselves.”

Y/n’s lips parted slightly, unsure what to say to that.

“You’re not broken,” he added gently. “You’re grieving. And grief can make you feel ugly. It can make you act ugly. But it doesn’t make you unworthy of healing. Or of finding something beautiful on the other side.”

The words hit deeper than Y/n was ready for. She felt her throat tighten but shoved the emotion down like second nature. Mr. Soraoka leaned forward again, the lines in his face deepening—not from age, but from the weight of memory.

“You’re right, Y/n. You didn’t come here to be anyone’s role model. And maybe you think I’m making a mistake choosing you. But I didn’t choose you because I expected perfection.”

His gaze sharpened, eyes locked onto hers with an intensity that made her freeze.

“I chose you because I knew your father.”

Y/n’s lips parted, and this time she couldn’t hide the flicker of surprise that crossed her face.

“I watched Harukemi grow up at this very camp,” Mr. Soraoka continued, voice dropping to something close to reverence. “From the first time he stepped onto the ice, all knees and nerves, to the day he left with more confidence and kindness than most men twice his age. I knew him before he was your father. Before he met your mother. Before the world shaped him into who he became.”

Y/n’s throat tightened, but she remained still, unsure where this was going.

“I have things,” he said slowly, deliberately. “Items. Stories. Pieces of him that no one else alive knows about or has seen. Things that could help you understand the man he was… the kind of father he tried to be even when you weren’t looking.”

Her breath caught, lashes lowering slightly as if she could hide from the sheer weight of those words.

“But here’s the deal, Y/n. A gamble, if you will.” Mr. Soraoka stood now, walking around the desk until he was just a few steps in front of her. “Complete one full day. One. Be present, be part of this. At the end of that day… I’ll give you something that belonged to Harukemi. Something real. And I’ll tell you the story behind it.”

Y/n’s heart pounded.

“But if you walk away now,” he added, the finality in his tone razor sharp, “then you’ll walk away from all of it. No second chances. No pleading, no begging, no matter how much you want to know. The door will close.”

Silence stretched between them like the hush before a winter storm.

“You choose, Y/n. Stay… and learn something that only I can give you. Or leave… and carry that emptiness forever.”

For a long moment, Y/n didn’t speak. Her eyes, which usually carried the weight of indifference and veiled frustration, shimmered with something unfamiliar—something raw. The crack in her armor was small, but undeniable. Her fingers moved slowly, as if unsure of themselves, until they gently wrapped around Mr. Soraoka’s weathered hand. The contact was soft, tentative, but sincere. Her thumb brushed against a callus near his knuckle, and her voice came out quieter than even she expected.

“What do I need to do first?”

Mr. Soraoka blinked, surprised—almost taken aback by the sudden shift in the girl who’d spent every second resisting connection like it was poison. But his surprise melted into something warmer, something deeply paternal. He smiled—no, beamed—and with his other hand, he gave her knuckles the gentlest rub, like how a father might comfort a child afraid of falling again.

“The first day is the easiest,” he said gently. “Today’s just about getting to know the other staff. Mingle, talk, let people see you. Let yourself… be seen.”

Y/n swallowed hard, trying to process the flood of unfamiliar emotions that stirred in her chest.

“You’ll be spending the next sixty-eight days with these people,” he continued. “You don’t have to make best friends, not today. But I want you to try. And even if it takes a minute—or a few—just keep trying. That’s all I ask.”

His words sat with her like a small fire in the cold.

“If you make it through the day,” he added, giving her hand one final squeeze before letting go, “come to my office tomorrow morning. I’ll be waiting—and I’ll bring something of Harukemi’s with me. A story worth hearing.”

Y/n nodded once, the motion stiff but full of intent.

As she stepped back, her chest felt tighter—but not in the suffocating way it usually did. This was different. Something was pulling her forward now, however fragile the thread might be.And for the first time in a long time, she whispered inside her own head: Okay. Just try.

The first staff mixer of the day had quickly devolved into a teeth-grinding cacophony of I love love! and camp is like, totally the best way to discover your true self! sentiments. Y/n sat cross-legged in the circle of counselors and volunteers, her hoodie sleeves pulled down over her hands and her expression utterly unreadable—except for the eye twitch that had made a persistent home on her left side. If she heard one more sentence that ended in “because love is the answer,” she might actually commit a felony... well another felony.

Would Dad be disappointed if I just… didn’t see this through? she thought, rubbing the back of her neck with a groan only she could hear. Her spiral of internal sarcasm was interrupted by a voice that struck her as familiar and annoying all in one.

“Huh?” Y/n asked, blinking as her focus snapped back to reality.

The same girl from earlier—the one who had pitched a fit about Y/n being named a counselor—was smirking at her with forced sweetness. But the second Y/n’s bored, flat tone hit the air, the smirk dissolved like sugar in water.

“I asked you a question. Are you even paying attention?” the girl pouted, clearly hoping to provoke something that just wasn’t going to come.

Y/n blinked once, slowly, then rolled her eyes and said absolutely nothing. Not today. She wasn’t going to get baited into a scene—not when she had something to prove. Something real. This girl and her issues weren’t her problem. Then, like a spotlight cutting through stage fog, a voice rang out over the chatter:

“Yo, newbie!”

Every head turned at the sound of Gojo’s voice—loud, smooth, and dripping with charisma he didn’t even try to contain.

“Come here,” he called, waving his long arm in a wide arc like a kid summoning a lost puppy. “All of us counselors wanna bond with you!”

There was a grin plastered on his face like he knew something she didn’t. Which made Y/n’s stomach twist with suspicion. What the hell does this guy want? She wondered, closing her eyes and grinding her molars together for just a second before forcing herself to stand up.

She didn't say a word to the group she was leaving behind—especially not to the pouty girl who now looked even more irritated at Y/n’s lack of reaction. She walked Gojo, who stood alone by an old totem pole wrapped in sparkling fairy lights and delicate snowflake garlands. Everything in the camp so far has screamed whimsical winter vibes—everything but the six-foot-something man himself. The closer Y/n got, the more aware she became of how tall Gojo actually was. He wasn’t just tall—he was tall tall. And it wasn’t just his height. His presence practically buzzed in the air, if chaos could wear sunglasses and crack jokes, it would look just like him.

Gojo’s bright blue eyes—so eerily similar to the icy wonderland around them—met hers. He smiled like the two of them were old friends even though they’d barely shared two words.

“Man, you’re tiny,” he said with a faux-pity sigh, resting his elbow on top of her head like she was furniture. “You sure you’re not here for the junior skaters' camp?”

Y/n glared up at him, deadpan. He was annoyingly even more good-looking up close. With how close they were, Y/n realized that he had healed cuts and scrapes on his face. Some of them looked as if they were deep and painful when they were first formed, but it did nothing to falter his beauty. Feeling as though she had been staring at him for far too long to be normal, Y/n opened her mouth.

“Touch me again and I’ll snap your arm like a twig.”

Gojo laughed—hard. A rich, full laugh that turned a few heads. But instead of being offended, he looked delighted. Almost as if the reaction Y/n gave is exactly what he wanted.

“Oh, I like you,” he said, taking a step back and motioning her to follow. “C’mon. We’ve got a game going—‘Two Truths and a Lie: Counselor Edition.’ You better not be boring.”

Y/n sighed but followed anyway. She had a deal to keep. Sixty-eight days. One day at a time. And if she had to deal with Gojo’s walking chaos generator of a personality to get there... fuck it we ball.

Y/n followed Gojo through the corridors of the camp, feeling the sharp bite of cold air through the large windows that dotted the halls. The camp was built like a small village, with sprawling cabins and wooden walkways that led to cozy rooms hidden away from the bustling activity outside. Gojo hummed a catchy tune as they walked, clearly unbothered by the chilly atmosphere, his hands tucked in his jacket pockets. Y/n, for her part, felt a prickling sense of unease, but she didn’t let it show—her mind was already somewhere else, counting down the minutes until she could disappear back into the shadows.

After a few turns, Gojo stopped in front of what appeared to be a newer small building that had a red door. He pulled out a key chain from under his shirt and inserted the key into the door lock.

"Alright, welcome to our little slice of peace," Gojo announced as he pushed the door open wide. Y/n stepped through, her eyes immediately scanning the room.

It was small—cozy, even—with soft lighting and plush chairs. A fireplace crackled in the corner, and a table was cluttered with snacks, drinks, and half-opened board games. But what stood out most was the atmosphere: the room was intimate, and there was a quiet, relaxed air to it that Y/n wasn’t expecting. Only the six counselors were inside, lounging around like old friends, casual and easy in a way Y/n wasn’t used to seeing from adults. This wasn’t the bustling mess of the camp’s main hall; this was a special break room, the kind of place that only certain people had access to.

“Okay,” Gojo continued, his eyes scanning the room. “We’ve got short-pint here, which means it’s time to get to know each other better. Two Truths and a Lie—camp edition. Don’t worry, I’ll play nice this time and keep it PG.”

Y/n glanced around, trying to get a sense of who the others were. There was the tall, gruff teen from earlier—Nanami, the one who had looked through her like she was invisible. He was leaning against the wall, arms crossed, his usual stern expression softened slightly, though Y/n could tell that he was still sizing her up. Then there was Suguru, the one with the quiet energy, sitting on the armrest of one of the chairs, chewing on something that looked like a granola bar. Shoko, the girl with sharp eyes and a cool demeanor, was sprawled out on the couch with her feet propped up on the cushion reading some magazine. Utahime, the more composed one with a delicate smile, was seated at the table, sketching away in a drawing book.

Gojo, ever the center of attention, leaned against the doorframe with that infuriatingly confident smile of his. He glanced over at Y/n jerking his head ever so slightly to encourage her to find a spot to sit. Y/n opted to sit in the bright red bean bag chair conveniently away from everyone else's seats.

“Alright, two truths and a lie: 1) I’ve been to five countries before I turned 10. 2) I can tie cherry stems in my mouth with nothing but my tongue. 3) I can do fifty pullups if not more in less than ten minutes.”

The others immediately started muttering among themselves, trying to guess which was the lie. Except for Suguru; who seemingly already knew the answer.

Y/n wasn’t interested in playing. Instead, she stood at the back of the group, arms crossed, watching them all interact. The banter was lighthearted, but it felt... forced to her, as if everyone was playing a role they were expected to fill. Her gaze flickered to Gojo, she was confused on why he seemed so adamant about the "bonding" game. It was clear they all knew each other so why do this?

Nanami, not one for games, didn’t waste any time. “The amount of countries is the lie; You've travelled to far more. You probably have been banned in a few of them.”

“Hey! I am always on my best behavior.... in foreign countries.” Gojo protested with a mock offended expression, puffing out his chest dramatically. “But you’re right— I think it was twenty seven? I don't really remember. That’s was my lie.”

“Alright, my turn,” Suguru said, sitting up. “1) I strategically complete 1000 brushes of my hair at night. 2) I used to collect rare insects. 3) I can hold my breath for over five minutes.”

“Man, I’d like to see that first one. Mr. Barbie,” Shoko teased with a smirk. “You definitely don’t strike me as flower, gleam, and glow type”

Suguru shrugged casually, clearly unfazed. “If you're ever stuck outside my tower, I would not let my hair down for you.”

They went around the circle, each counselor revealing little facts about themselves—some true, some not. Y/n couldn’t help but listen, though she wasn’t quite participating. The game remained lighthearted among all of the teens. Even Nanami participated.. When it was Y/n’s turn, Gojo raised his eyebrows, clearly expecting some kind of spectacular reveal.

“Well?” he prodded. “Your turn, short-pint.”

Y/n didn’t answer immediately; she only frowned in annoyance from the already aggravating nickname. She wasn't even short; he was just a fucking giant. She let the silence stretch, allowing the weight of her words to settle. What should she say? Be honest? Lie? With a glance at each of the counselors, she finally spoke, her voice casual but flat.

“Um.. Okay. 1) I have three tattoos. 2) I once did a backflip on ice in skates. 3) My nipples are pierced.”

A small choking noise came immediately from Nanami's mouth as he looked away from Y/n. Shoko and Utahime doubled over in laughter at the blush rising on the blonde's face. Suguru smirked slightly before nodding in approval while Gojo's eyes flickered down to her chest, but came back up as he felt the hard shove from Suguru on his side.

"What? I just wanted to confirm." Gojo shrugged, holding back a laugh

“I wonder which one could be the lie?” Utahime asked, cutting Gojo off between her giggles.

Y/n didn’t respond, instead letting the silence drag on. There was something satisfying about making them work for her attention. Nanami let out a quiet sigh, adjusting the sleeves of his sweater as he finally looked back at Y/n. “The lie is the piercings” he stated firmly.

“Aw... boo... I had mad respect for you” Shoko pouted, tossing a piece of popcorn into her mouth without missing a beat.

Gojo laughed, “I think you just wanted to see them, Shoko."

“Like you weren't staring. ” Suguru teased with a small smile, to which Gojo gasped and elbowed his friend playfully.

“Now that,” Gojo said, “was for research nothing more.”

Y/n rolled her eyes. “You both are exhausting. But yes that is the lie. ”

Gojo placed a hand over his heart. “What are you saying fuck me for? What did I do?”

Despite herself, a small chuckle escaped her lips. Just barely. It died quickly, but it had happened, and unfortunately for her, they all noticed.

“So,” Utahime said with a curious smile, “you really have tattoos? But you're so young though”

Y/n shrugged and leaned back against the wall, crossing her arms. “Not that young; I'm 17.”

“Definitely the youngest here. You're the baby now” Shoko said. “Utahime is the oldest so she'll take good care of you.”

Gojo tilted his head, watching her a little more closely now. “You're 17? Jeez, I feel old now. I almost 19.”

“You are only a year and some change older than me; relax buddy. Y/n replied, tapping her foot against the wooden floor lazily. "I'll be 18 soon anyways."

There was a brief silence, one that was more curious than awkward. It felt like—for the first time—Y/n wasn’t a ghost hovering on the edge of the group. She’d slipped into the fold without fully meaning to. She wasn't sure how to feel about these people as of yet, but it was clear that she was going to be around them often so being cordial was the best option.

“You’re an interesting one,” Gojo said, looking Y/n up and down with an unreadable expression. “We are gonna have so much fun together.”

“Is that so?” Y/n replied; despite her dry tone, she had the faintest flicker of a smirk playing on her lips.

Utahime stood and clapped her hands together. “Alright, enough bonding for now. Let’s get ready for dinner prep before people start trying to eat each other.”

Everyone slowly began to rise, stretching and finishing their snacks. As they filtered out of the room, Gojo lingered behind, giving Y/n a glance as he pulled open the door.

“You’re better at this than you think,” he said casually.

“I’m not trying,” Y/n replied, blinking owlishly at the man.

Gojo grinned, showing off that award-winning smile again. “Exactly.”

The mess hall had transformed. What once looked like a basic communal dining area was now buzzing with preparation and purpose. Lights dimmed just slightly, casting a warm hue across the wood-paneled walls. The long dining tables had been cleaned, lined with simple but elegant tablecloths, and set with actual cutlery—none of the flimsy plastic Y/n was expecting. She stood near the entrance, watching the chaos unfold like an outsider at a stage production. Everyone had slipped seamlessly into their roles, as if this dance had been rehearsed a thousand times.

Utahime was in full organizer mode, her brow furrowed in concentration as she hung subtle winter-themed garlands near the windows and placed small battery-operated candles at the center of each table. Her movements were quick, efficient, and entirely focused. Geto was at the far end of the hall, bent over the sound system tucked into a wooden corner shelf. Soft instrumental music floated from the speakers, nothing overpowering, just ambiance. He adjusted the volume, then turned to angle the small spotlight in a way that wouldn’t blind anyone but would still keep the area well-lit. He nodded to himself, clearly satisfied.

Near the kitchen entrance, Shoko stood over a series of prepared plates, moving with practiced ease. She wore an apron—probably stolen from a cartoon character’s wardrobe—that said “Too Tired to Function,” and yet she looked perfectly at ease as she added garnishes to the steaming dishes, inspecting each one before sliding it down to the next station. Gojo, unsurprisingly, had the least structured role, and yet somehow the most chaotic. He flitted between the stove and the prep counter, grabbing a small container of chili flakes to add a final kick to one of the trays of roasted vegetables. His sleeves were rolled up, and there was flour on the side of his cheek like some weird war paint. He whistled while he worked, completely in his own world.

Then there was Nanami. Clipboard in hand, glasses pushed up the bridge of his nose, he looked like the most intimidating camp counselor anyone had ever seen—but damn if things weren’t running smoothly under his watch. He kept a close eye on the clock and called out time checks every so often, reminding people of deadlines with all the grace of a seasoned drill sergeant.

Y/n swallowed hard. How the hell did they do this every day? It wasn’t just the physical labor—it was the energy, the care, the constant alertness to everyone else’s needs. She felt like her chest was tightening just watching it. It was too much. No one had ever expected her to take care of anyone else. Hell, half the time she forgot to eat herself. And now here she was, in a room full of people that made this look easy. She didn’t realize how long she’d been standing frozen near the door until she heard someone call her name.

“Y/n!” Shoko’s voice rang out, sharp but not unkind. The older girl glanced up from the stack of plates she was organizing and gave a slight nod toward the drink pitchers on the side cart. “Can you help pour drinks and set them out on the tables outside?”

Y/n blinked. “Uh… yeah. Sure.”

She moved toward the cart, grabbing a few empty glasses and a pitcher of lemonade. Her hands weren’t exactly steady, but she focused on not spilling anything. That was manageable, right? Just pour drinks. Carry them outside. Don’t trip. Don’t overthink it. As she stepped outside, the cool air hit her skin, a small comfort to balance out the buzzing anxiety in her chest. She walked between the tables, setting down the drinks carefully, letting the music and the warmth inside trail behind her like a distant hum. The scent of warm food and crisp winter air blended together as everyone finally took their seats at the long outdoor table, the sky now cloaked in hues of navy and deep violet. String lights overhead blinked softly like distant stars, casting a golden glow over everyone’s faces. Laughter was easy, and for a brief moment, the stress of preparation melted away into the steam rising from their plates.

Y/n sat toward the end of the table, a plate of food in front of her she hadn’t quite touched yet. Her eyes drifted from person to person, watching the way they filled the space around her—Utahime smiling politely between bites, Suguru teasing Gojo for putting too much heat on the vegetables, Shoko sipping from a mug that probably had more than hot chocolate in it, and Nanami chewing quietly but listening to every word. It was… weird. The ease of it all.

“Man, I can’t wait for the kids to get here,” Gojo said with a bright grin, his voice rising above the low murmur of conversation. “That’s when things really start. Chaos, excitement, and endless requests for extra dessert—what’s not to love?”

“They really are the heart of the camp,” Utahime added, folding her napkin neatly into her lap. “Some of them look forward to this all year.”

“Even the ones who pretend they hate it,” Shoko chimed in, arching a brow in Y/n’s direction.

Y/n blinked, caught off guard. She gave a noncommittal shrug and picked at a piece of bread on her plate.

Suguru leaned back in his chair. “You’ll see. First-timers are always a little overwhelmed, but when the kids get here… things shift.”

“I’m not really a kid person,” Y/n muttered under her breath, but no one seemed to hear her. Or maybe they just chose not to.

Nanami finally set down his fork, brushing his fingers with a napkin before clearing his throat in that quiet, no-nonsense way of his.

“Speaking of which,” he said, glancing at Y/n. “You’ll need to be tested before the week ends.”

Y/n’s gaze snapped toward him, her brows furrowing. “Tested?”

“Ice skating,” he said plainly. “You’re set to be one of the instructors this year. It’s one of the more popular activities, and we can’t have someone teaching if they don’t know the basics. Safety and skill go hand-in-hand.”

Y/n nearly choked on her water. “You want me to teach a bunch of kids how to ice skate?”

Nanami’s expression didn’t change. “It’s part of your counselor assignment.”

“Do you even know if I can skate?”

“That’s why you’re being tested.”

Gojo leaned in from across the table, grinning like a troublemaker with a front-row seat to the drama. “C’mon, it'll be fun. Worst case scenario, you fall on your ass, and we all laugh before taking to our best nurse, Shoko.”

"Nurse in training." Shoko correct, “But he's right. The best-case scenario though, is you impress us all and become the camp’s unexpected prodigy.”

Y/n stared down at her plate, lips pressing into a tight line. Why did it feel like everyone here was always ten steps ahead of her? Like they knew exactly where she was supposed to fit in, even when she didn’t? She didn’t answer—not right away, at least. But something about the way they were talking… they weren’t mocking her. Not really. They were including her, in the same breath they teased and pushed. Like she was already expected to rise to the occasion. God, her dad really had to be some kind of saint if this was the kind of world he belonged to.

Y/n finally picked up her fork and stabbed a carrot. “Fine. But if I break something, I’m haunting all of you.”

Gojo raised his cup like a toast. “Deal.”

After dinner, the warm, comforting chatter in the mess hall slowly gave way to the clatter of dishes being cleared and chairs scraping against the wooden floors. Everyone moved with purpose, each counselor seamlessly falling into their roles—Gojo cracking jokes while rinsing plates, Utahime stacking chairs with practiced grace, Nanami double-checking everyone’s assigned tasks, and Shoko wiping down tables in calm, efficient motions. Even Suguru, quiet as ever, was collecting the leftover decorations with a lazy rhythm.

Y/n did her part without complaint, but her hands were clumsy. Her thoughts spun in circles, spiraling fast. You’ll be tested… to see if you're fit to teach the kids how to skate. Nanami had said it so casually during dinner, but the words hadn’t stopped replaying in her head since. Skating. Teaching skating. Her stomach was twisted in a series of tight, painful knots—more like cramps now. She hadn’t skated in years. Not seriously, anyway. Not since... well, it didn’t matter. What mattered was that they expected her to be responsible for actual children. Children who would look to her for guidance and trust her to keep them safe on the ice.

God. She could barely take care of herself.

Once the mess hall was back in order, Nanami dismissed them for personal wind-down time. “Two hours. Be where you need to be.”

Y/n wasted no time slipping out. The cold air hit her like a slap the moment she stepped outside, but she welcomed it. The quiet of the night was a relief compared to the buzz in her head. By the time she reached her private cabin—one of the perks of being a counselor—she was moving on autopilot. Her fingers fumbled with the zipper of her jacket, and her eyes drifted toward the bed where her old skates hung loosely from the post. Mocking her. Daring her. She stared at them for what felt like an eternity before moving. Fifteen minutes later, she was slipping out the back of the cabin dressed in clothes she definitely hadn’t packed with skating in mind: form-fitting black flare leggings, a pastel pink tank top she hadn’t worn in months, and her zip-up hoodie drawn tightly.

The path to the rink was lit by soft, overhead bulbs strung between the trees like fairy lights, but her focus was razor sharp. When she finally found the main door to the rink, it was locked. That didn’t stop her. Locks were more like suggestions to someone with her history. She crouched down, worked quickly, and with a satisfying click, the door creaked open. She stepped inside, pulling it shut quietly behind her. The rink stretched out in front of her, vast and untouched under the dim lights. The stillness made her heart race. Her breath puffed out in soft clouds as she stepped toward the edge and slipped off her hoodie, folding it neatly by the boards. Now exposed to the cold, she felt everything sharper—each sound, each memory that the ice awakened beneath her skin.

She laced up her skates with shaking hands, trying to ignore the swell of bittersweet feeling pressing against her ribcage. The last time she skated… it had felt like freedom. Now it felt like pressure. Like expectation. With a slow inhale, she stood. The first step onto the ice nearly sent her sprawling. She caught herself against the boards with a curse and a wince. The cold was biting through her clothes and into her bones now, but she didn’t stop. She pushed forward, unsteady, her legs unsure, and her balance off. She fell. Hard. The second time, it hurt less. The third time, she didn’t fall; she began to remember.

It wasn’t graceful. Her movements were stiff, her knees too locked, her posture too guarded—but there was something there. Muscle memory kicking in. Every pass across the rink got a little smoother. Every fall hurt a little less. She kept going. Again and again.

By the time she glided toward the center of the ice without stumbling, her breath was heaving and her body was shaking—but not from the cold. It was something else. Something raw and strange. She closed her eyes. The ice was silent beneath her. Her father had skated here. Maybe even stood right here.

If you make it through all the activities today, I’ll give you an item that belonged to Harukemi and tell you the story surrounding it. Her fingers curled at her sides. There were things she needed to know. Y/n opened her eyes and took a deep, measured breath. She wasn’t ready for kids. She wasn’t ready to be seen, not really. But maybe she could try. If she kept falling, she’d just have to keep getting up. One skate pushed forward, then the other.

Gojo hadn’t meant to follow her. Honestly, he was just heading back from dropping off a crate of leftover pantry goods when he saw movement by the rink’s side building. The soft sound of the front door creaking open caught his attention. It wasn’t supposed to be open. Not this late. Not when everything was shut down. Curiosity piqued, he slipped into the shadows. He found himself leaning against the outer wall of the rink, tucked just far enough in the darkness to go unnoticed. Through the high glass windows, he saw her. Y/n.

At first, she was just a bundled shape by the boards, sitting still, head low, lacing up skates. He almost turned away—figured maybe she needed the ice to think, and honestly, everyone at this camp had their thing. But then she stood. And fell. Gojo winced a little, covering his mouth as a quiet laugh slipped out. It wasn’t mocking—there was something oddly endearing about it. The girl who stared everyone down with that deadpan glare was out here looking like a newborn deer on ice. She pushed herself back up, brushed frost from her leggings, and tried again. And again.

Each fall brought another smirk tugging at Gojo’s lips, an itch in his fingers to step out and help her up, make a dumb joke, pull her in close and show her how it’s done. But something about the way she gritted her teeth, how she refused to give up, made him hold back. She didn’t need saving. So he stayed there, in the dark. Then something happened. Without warning—like flipping a switch—her body began to remember. Her skates stopped scraping clumsily against the ice. Her posture straightened, her movements shifted. The unsure fumbling turned to gliding, then to spinning, then to soaring. Her arms flowed out at her sides, chest lifted, eyes half-closed like she was listening to music no one else could hear.

Gojo squinted; he had to be seeing incorrectly.

He reached up and pulled his prescription glasses from his head and slipped them onto his face. The world sharpened instantly, and his breath caught in his throat. Wow. That was all he could think. Y/n—this messy, sharp-tongued, dry-humored girl who barely spoke in full sentences—was glowing. Not just metaphorically. It was like something deep inside her had been ignited. Her usual dull aura, that heavy fog she dragged behind her like a second skin, was gone. In its place was something radiant. Beautiful. Light that didn’t just shine—it danced. It reached out and touched everything around her, rippling across the ice like sunbeams caught in snow.

She skated like she belonged to the air itself.

Her hair was freed from the makeshift hair tie she had and bounced with every move she made, arms cutting clean lines through the frosted night, her tank top clinging to her in soft pastel hues that contrasted the raw power of her movement. There was elegance there, but also pain. Precision and chaos, perfectly blended. Every turn of her skate, every breath she took—it was art. And Gojo couldn’t look away. His fingers curled slightly against the wooden paneling he leaned on. His heart didn’t race—he wouldn’t even call it that—but something in his chest shifted. Twitched. Pulled.

He didn’t understand it, not yet. But something about her—this girl who barely spoke, who looked at the world like it had already disappointed her beyond repair—was beginning to unravel a knot inside of him he didn’t know existed. She looked free and he wanted that freedom desperately. Her movements were strategically calculated like his were. She moved on her own accord and still managed to look graceful. He needed to feel that free at least once in his life; especially before his parents do anymore damage.

❄ Author's Note: I know this is long... probably the longest thing I have ever written. It started off as a drabble, but I got carried away. I plan to post part two sometime this week, but I really really am proud of it. I have always been a sucker for cheesy high school romcoms and decided that Gojo didn't belong in Shonen but a Shoujo so I am making it happen my damn-self. I plan for this to be finished in eight parts and have five major plot points to meet, and then random little scenarios that I have thought were cute and needed to see. This is a Gojo-centered fic, so no other love interests will be an option, but more characters will be mentioned, and Y/n will interact with everyone individually. I can answer any questions in the comments! Thank you to all who read the entire thing! You guys mean the world to me

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gravehags · 11 months ago

Text

the fabric of your flesh

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x f!Reader (Curator!Reader), Cirrus x f!Reader x Cumulus

Rating: EXPLICIT, MDNI

Tags: oh god where to begin, threesome, oral (m receiving), oral (f receiving), making out, serious relationship conversations, consensual infidelity, titty sucking, QUINT STRAP, masturbation, voyeurism, copia in the cuck chair, copia getting his balls slapped for being a little shit

Words: 7,300

Summary: You've always liked the ghoulettes. Maybe a little too much for your own good.

a/n: this fic takes place sometime after the events of sweet treat, a short little fic i wrote which sets the stage for the events of this piece. this is the longest single thing i've ever written so you know. enjoy lmao.

~~~

“Cardinal, what are your thoughts on sharing?”

Copia sets down the document he was reviewing and leans back in his chair, looking up at the ghoulette looming over his desk.

“It’s eh, a nice concept,” he says slowly, eyes flicking from Cirrus’ face to Cumulus seated behind her. “Is there something you…have in mind?”

“Your girl,” Cirrus says bluntly, and Cumulus yanks her backwards to sit in the chair next to her and give her a stern look. Copia’s eyebrows raise and he reaches up to stroke his mustache.

“What Cirrus was trying to say,” Cumulus begins, giving Cirrus another sideways glance, “is that we noticed there’s some um. Tension. Amongst us. And it’s not romantic,” she says in a rush, raising her hands placatingly when Copia opens his mouth, “we have no designs on her heart. That thoroughly belongs to you. What we mean is ah…more physical.”

A silence falls in the office as Copia watches his ghoulettes carefully while trying to fight back a smile.

“I see,” he says solemnly, leaning forward to steeple his hands, “have you discussed this with her?”

“We didn’t want to uh, step on any toes. So no. Not yet, anyway.”

He lets the silence simmer for a moment, watching Cirrus look around the room and Cumulus anxiously rub her hands. When he begins to laugh it makes both of them jump in their seats.

“Ladies,” he chuckles, “as if I haven’t seen your hungry eyes on her at every turn. I am very glad that you asked me for permission but the person you really need to speak to is her.”

A beat passes.

“So…is that a yes?” Cirrus asks, leaning forward.

“From me, sì. Under one condition, naturalmente.”

The ghoulettes look to one another.

“I get to watch.”

Cirrus snickers and Cumulus smiles.

“Oh that was a given, of course. But…you’re open to it?”

He smiles fondly at them.

“Sì, sì, I think it’s only fair to let her experience being with a woman or, eh. Women. Since she came to me untouched.”

“She what?!”

Once again he has to smother his laughter and instead looks at their gobsmacked faces kindly.

“Oh yes, you didn’t know? Despite her inexperience, however, she’s always been rather eh, voracious. And well…she’s not so inexperienced now I suppose, heh.” His eyes briefly unfocus as his mind conjures images of you in a litany of positions, eagerly and loudly taking him deep inside your–

Cumulus clears her throat politely.

“W-what…what were we talking about?”

“Your mate and her considerable sexual appetite,” Cirrus says wryly. Copia flushes deeply and fusses with his cassock, ignoring the bulge in his lap currently being hidden from view by his desk.

“Eh, right, right. Well as I said, this is ultimately her decision so uh, by all means. I think she’s working in the archives today.”

The ghoulettes stand and Cirrus gives him a slight bow before they turn to leave.

“Best of luck, my ghoulettes,” he calls to them as they walk out, surreptitiously adjusting himself. When the door shuts behind him he sags against the back of his chair.

This is going to prove interesting.

—

“Knock knock.”

You turn to look at the door and see two figures slip into the room - Copia’s ghoulettes, Cumulus and Cirrus. Your face splits in a smile - and your cheeks flush - as you wave the two in.

“Come on in, I’m just going through some of these old purchasing records for the collection. I–sorry, neither of you want to hear about this,” you say sheepishly, tucking your hair behind your ear.

Cirrus hops up to sit on one of the research tables while Cumulus leans on it next to her.

“We’d love to hear about it,” Cumulus murmurs.

You laugh. “You’re both very kind but not even Copia can listen to me talk about this kind of thing without nodding off no matter how hard he tries. I won’t subject you to it. How can I help you, though? Surely you didn’t come down here just to see me.”

“And if we did?” Cirrus purrs, leaning forward and putting her palms on her knees. Cumulus shoots her a sideways glance, lips tugging downwards in a slight frown.

There they are. Those butterflies ricocheting off the inside of your stomach every time you have an encounter with the two of them. The butterflies that make you sick if you allow yourself to linger on them. The butterflies that whisper accusations of infidelity in your ear.

“T-Then I’m sorry to disappoint you, ladies, for not being a more entertaining host.”

“Actually,” Cumulus says, her voice soft, “we wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Oh?” you’ve abandoned the stack of record books to fidget with your hands.

“Something um, personal.”

Cirrus hops down from the table and slowly begins to advance on you, lips curving into a smile that shows the points of her canines. It’s predatory and devious and utterly delicious and you’re terrified. She backs you against a bookcase and props her hand above your head, her breath stirring the flyaways on the side of your face.

“Cirrus!” Cumulus barks, “You’re freaking her out, knock it off!”

Cirrus whips around.

“What? I just figured the best way to get what we want is to show her what we want.”

“And w-what do you want?”

Your voice is small, your concentration mainly focused on how you’re going to explain this should any unexpected visitors walk in. Cirrus still looms above you but is pulled away roughly by Cumulus, giving you an opportunity to breathe once again.

“Angel,” the shorter ghoulette breathes and the pet name makes your knees wobble traitorously, “We had a conversation with the Cardinal earlier - about this thing going on between the three of us.”

“N-nothing’s going on,” you whisper, panicked. “What…what did you say to him?”

“This is going really well, ‘Lus” Cirrus groans, collapsing in a desk chair.

“Fuck,” Cumulus swears under her breath, “okay let’s back up. Start with the basics. We like you.”

“…I like you too.”

“Allow me to be more specific. We like you. As in we want you.”

Your mouth gapes but no words come out.

“As in,” Cirrus says, spinning in the chair, “as in we want to do filthy, unspeakable, unholy things to you. And don’t act surprised - we can smell it on you. You want it too.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” you scoff, cheeks flushed and arms crossed defensively, “I-I would never be unfaithful to Copia, regardless of what you smell on me.”

“We know, hon,” Cumulus murmurs, “which brings us back to the conversation we had with him earlier today.”

“You spoke with him about–about—”

“Sharing you?” Cirrus smirks, “Yeah. And he was open to it, under one condition - and provided that you are open to it, of course.”

“Sharing me? What like some kind of fucked up romantic timeshare situation? He was open to that?”

“Oh, don’t worry - we have no designs on your romantic relationship. We would never do that to the Cardinal. What we propose is purely physical.”

You go quiet for a moment, heart racing.

“What was Copia’s condition? Apart from my consent.”

“He wants to watch,” Cirrus says, lips curling into a filthy grin.

Your cheeks are so hot you swear you’re going to pass out, but no longer from embarrassment or stress.

From arousal.

“The two of you…really want me?”

Both ghoulettes laugh incredulously.

“Is that so hard to believe?” Cumulus says, stepping forward to toy with the loose ends of your hair. “Pretty little thing like you? Always being so sweet to us - to all the ghouls? We would be honored to have you.”

“And have you we would,” Cirrus growls, rising from her seat to advance on you once more, “Over and over until you beg for us to stop. Get you so drunk on pussy you can’t think anymore. All while your beloved mate watches us. So what do you say?”

When your eyes slide closed and head tilts back, a small whimper escapes you and you hear Cumulus sharply inhale.

“Think that’s a ‘yes’, ‘Lus.”

“I want to hear her say it,” Cumulus breathes, “Go on, angel. Tell us what you want.”

“Want…” your voice comes out in a rasp, “want you both. Want you to fuck me until I forget my own name. Want to taste you. And I want Copia to watch as you use my body for your own pleasure. Please. Please I–”

Your words are cut off as Cumulus lunges forward and slides her fingers to cup the base of your skull as her soft lips press against yours. She’s languorous about it - decadent - teasing your mouth open to slide her tongue against yours. You hear Cirrus whine and Cumulus chuckles into your mouth before pulling away. Before you can say a word, the taller ghoulette is upon you, backing you into the bookcase once more. Her kiss is more forceful than Cumulus’ - though no less enjoyable - and you gasp in delight when she slots a firm thigh in between your legs. When your hips rut against her, she pulls back.

“The Cardinal was right,” Cirrus grins, “you are a voracious little thing, aren’t you?”

You laugh, hands brushing her waist.

“He said that about me?”

“Mmhmm,” Cumulus says with a smile, “so…when do you want us?”

“Let me text Copia, tell him to come down here and I’ll let you bend me over a desk right here and now.”

The ghoulettes erupt in laughter.

“Oh no, angel, we’re going to do this right. We want you in a proper bed where we can take our time with you, yeah?”

“Hmm, if you insist,” you say with a pout, cocking your head to the side. “I’ll talk to him and see what works best. Soon.”

Cirrus bends down and drags the tip of her tongue along your lower lip, making you whimper. She steps back, allowing Cumulus to step in and run her lips along your jawline before kissing you softly.

“Can’t wait to give the Cardinal a show,” she breathes. “See you around, angel.”

“Mmhmm,” you confirm, and as soon as they came in, they’re gone. You sigh heavily.

Your conversation with your lover tonight should prove interesting. And you intend on showing him just how thankful you are.

—--

After the two of you converse on the matter - at great length until you’re both exhausted - you’re collapsed halfway on his chest as the two of you catch your breath. As you roll off him, you laugh.

“I gotta be honest, love, I’m a little bit surprised.”

“Hmm?” he says, angling himself to look at you. “What do you mean?”

“This whole thing with the ghoulettes. I never thought you would ever want to uh, share me. Especially considering I have caught you on multiple occasions chastising siblings and ghouls for giving me the once-over.”

“Eh, noticed that, did you?” Copia says, cheeks flushing, “Well, I don’t know. Part of me feels bad for scooping you up before you got a chance to…explore your desires. Especially with women so…” he finishes lamely.

“Uh-huh. Very kind of you. And certainly not because you have a filthy fantasy about watching me get destroyed by two beautiful, infernal women. Surely that has nothing to do with it.”

“Amore!” Copia objects, placing a hand to his heart, “My intentions are pure!”

“Oh, of course,” you smirk, rolling your eyes, “When the ghoulettes approached you, you definitely weren’t thinking about how pretty I’d look getting my titties sucked and pussy ate - my cheeks all flushed and sweaty as I moan wantonly, my eyes on you from the bed while they–”

“Enough!” Copia croaks, head falling back against the pillow. “Cazzo, are you trying to get me to cum in the sheets?”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” you snark, hand drifting down to cup the length of him. “Though I’m not sure I’ve had enough of you yet, Your Eminence.”

You shift the bedcovers, laying a line of fervent kisses down his chest.

“Again, amore?”

You place several wet kisses to his belly, grinning up at him.

“Don’t say that as if you’re not enjoying every second of this. We spent almost a whole year in each other’s presence without fucking each other’s brains out. That’s a lot of time to make up for, beloved.”

He chuckles, threading his fingers through your hair as you lick a stripe up his cock.

“You’re insatiable, diavoletta mia.”

“That’s what the ghoulettes said that you said about me. As if you didn’t keep me locked in your bedroom for almost three days after the first time we made love.”

“Mmm let’s do that aga–ah!”

You’ve had enough chatter, and show him so by slipping the length of him into your eager mouth. He’s silent for only a moment, hips flexing against you, before he begins babbling praise.

“Perfetta ragazza,” he groans as your head bobs to take him deeper, “you’re too–hnngh–good to this old man. Always knew that–ah–mouth of yours would look good like this. And that tongue, Sathanas…”

You chuckle around him, sliding off just enough to suckle the swollen head, making him moan and fist your hair. He ruts jerkily against you so you hold him down, thumbs caressing his hip bones as your tongue traces up his length.

“You’re right, you know,” he pants, “This–ah–thing with the ghoulettes? S-somewhat selfish reasons. Every time I see you with them I-I picture you in this bed, p-pleasuring each other. I trust them, trust that they will not–ah–overstep–fuck, amore!”

You’ve taken him back as far as you can and swallowed around him, hand gently massaging his balls. His breath comes in sharp whines as he fights to not thrust dumbly into you, chasing his pleasure. He’s close, you can tell by the broken way he spouts his praise, so you double down and hollow your cheeks.

“Cazzo, cazzo, caz–oh dolcezza, j-just like that. A-almost there, fuck baby.”

You pull off him just enough to suck on the head and, resting it on your tongue, your hand rockets up and down the wet length of him. He lifts his head up and looks into your half-lidded eyes and with a groan his cock spasms against your tongue, spurting his seed into your open and eager mouth.

“That’s it, amore, take it,” he sighs, rutting his hips against your mouth, “Fuck, you look beautiful like this.”

Your lips wrap around his softening cock for a moment, sucking any remnants off of him before pulling off with a pop and making a big show of swallowing and sitting back on your haunches. Copia lets out a tired laugh but he’s got a glint in his eye as his gaze roves your naked form.

“Get up here,” he growls, crooking a finger at you. Slowly, you crawl along his body until your breasts are flush against his chest hair and you can feel his breath against your lips.

“No,” he says patiently, raising a finger to tap on his mustache, “here.”

“Again, amore?” you ask, mocking his earlier words.

“Shall I tie you up and hold you down to have my meal instead?” his hands grip at the meat of your ass, urging you upwards. “Come. Here. Now.”

Oh, how you love when the bossy Cardinal comes out.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

You’re naked and bent over one of the drawers you’ve hijacked from Copia, rifling through various pieces of lace and silk. The man in question is leaning against the doorway to his bedroom, arms crossed as he observes you.

“What’s the fuss, amore?”

“The fuss–” you say, standing up and putting your hands on your hips, “--is I cannot figure out what I’m going to wear for this…rendezvous.”

“Eh, traditionally I think it’s done in the nude.”

You glare at him and brandish a pale pink mesh thong in his direction.

“You know what I mean, I have to make a…a good impression. Sexy. I can’t just answer the door with my tits and coochie out like ‘hello welcome to the filth den’. I mean, come on, I agonized over what to wear when I went to seduce you too.”

“Did you?” he asks, eyebrows raised as he ambles over to you, “Ah, now that was memorable. Seeing you sitting in my chair in that pretty little virginal cream silk slip, waiting for me. Ready for me. Mmm cara, so eager–”

Abruptly he pulls you backwards against his chest, fingers sliding down your belly before teasing at the heat of you.

“Copia, my love, as much as I appreciate where this is going,” you murmur, “they’re going to be here in twenty minutes and respectfully, I’m not giving them sloppy seconds.”

“Ugh, fine,” he growls, relinquishing his grip on you. “What about that eh, dark blue silk piece you have? With the lace along the neckline? It looks so pretty with your hair.”

Huh. There’s a thought.

You bend over to do some more digging - ignoring the way Copia is insistently grinding against your ass - and locate it with a triumphant noise. You turn in his grip and kiss him firmly.

“My love, this was inspired, I–” there’s something familiar nudging against you and you look up at him, “Don’t get excited so soon my love, I’d hate for you to uh - finish before anything even begins.”

“Ah dolcezza, I might be in my fifties but have I not proven to have the stamina of Zeus himself?”

“Zeus, huh?” you say, giving him a look, “I certainly hope you don’t have his sense of fidelity, too.”

He looks affronted. It’s cute.

“Amore, you question my faithfulness? You question my devotion? I would never touch another. You, on the other hand. Oh, you were just waiting for this opportunity, weren’t you?”

He’s got an evil little grin on his face and you know he’s trying to get a rise out of you but your lips dip down into a frown and your heart sinks.

“Copia, you know I would never…maybe this isn’t a good idea,” you sigh deeply, biting your lip as tears well in your eyes.

“Oh amore mio,” he says softly, cupping your cheeks in his hands, “I was only teasing! If you are not comfortable with this, say the word and I will end it immediatamente. Truly though, it’s okay, huh? People do eh, exploring all the time while still maintaining loyalty to a partner. And I trust both them and you. My desires are inconsequential - but allow me to give you this gift, sì?”

You nod slowly.

“I love you,” you murmur, reaching up to take his hands in yours, “so much. So much it scares me sometimes, you know? I would never, ever want to do anything that would hurt you.”

He kisses each of your hands.

“And I love you. I know you wouldn’t hurt me but if you have any uncertainty, know that I am A-OK with this. Prometto. Nothing will ever come between us but Sathanas you are going to look so lovely spread out beneath them. On top of them. Sideways, even.”

You sniffle and laugh.

“Hmm,” your eyes glaze over for a moment, “what do you think they’re going to do to me, Cope?”

“Anything. Everything. Kiss and lick and suck and fuck…they’re going to take you apart, dolcezza.”

You shiver.

“Getting me all worked up, Cardinal,” you breathe, the tip of your tongue sliding out to wet your lips.

“I would be a poor host if I did not, eh, ready the party favor, hmm?”

Stepping back with a smile, you slide the midnight blue slip over your head and look in the mirror to loosen your hair from its messy bun.

“Perfetta,” Copia whispers, watching you adjust strands so they fall just right, “they will not be able to resist you.”

“And I will not offer any resistance,” you say quietly, turning away from the mirror to face your beloved. You smooth your hands down the front of his black suit and smile.

“I can do this,” you murmur, those familiar butterflies back in your stomach.

“Only if you want to but yes, I believe you can,” he smiles, fussing at your hair. Abruptly, you grab him by the back of the head and slot your lips against his in an aggressive kiss that slowly turns more lazy and soft. You feel a throb from between your thighs as he whimpers when you suck on his tongue and slowly pull away.

“Good luck tonight,” you purr, “don’t give up the game too quickly, hmm?”

He laughs.

“I had plenty of solo practice drawing things out before we got together, thank you very much.”

“Oh yeah?” you say, cocking your head, “Surely you weren’t thinking of me any of those times…”

“Surely not,” he shakes his head with a smile, “Surely there was another curator who liked to smile at me so prettily and shake her ass so tantalizingly whenever she walked in front of me in tight little skirts. That curator was always so kind to this lecherous old Cardinal. Mmm she was so sweet and soft and–eh, what were we talking about?”

“How you used to shamelessly jack off after staring at my ass?”

“No, no, that was the other curator–”

You roll your eyes and reach your hand down to cup his bulge, making him whine and buck into your touch.

“Easy, dolcezza, easy…I am in a fragile state.”

“‘Fragile state’ my ass,” you grin, “I’ve seen you roll off of me and not ten minutes later hop back on like I’m a pony at a state fair.”

“Ah, not entirely accurate,” he says, lifting a pedantic finger, “you are slightly nicer looking than a pony.”

You slap his balls sharply, causing him to double over with a yelp.

“Just for that, I’m definitely going to leave you for a ghoulette now. Maybe a ghoul too. Who knows?”

“Amore!” he wheeze-laughs, comically cupping himself, “be sweet to me, huh? I might not survive tonight after watching what they do with you…”

“Povera mia,” you croon, “to be fair, I might not survive, myself. I–”

Three knocks sound at the door to Copia’s quarters and you exhale heavily.

“Do you want me to–”

“Yeah,” you nod, walking over to the bed and lowering yourself to sit on the end, facing the doorway. Your heart thuds in your chest as you watch your beloved amble over to the door and open it, smiling when you hear his familiar odd little noises as he stands aside and gestures for your guests to come in. When the ghoulettes step through the threshold your breath catches in your throat. It’s not exactly that you’d forgotten how beautiful they both are but Sathanas it continuously takes you by surprise. They’re both wearing casual clothing - Cirrus in a large t-shirt and basketball shorts and Cumulus in a floral robe - and an anxious laugh bleats out of you before you can smother it. Cumulus is preoccupied with saying something to Copia but Cirrus hears it and gives you a sly grin and a cocked brow. When Copia extends his arm to gesture towards you, your heart plummets into your stomach.

“He–” your voice comes out thick and croaky, “hey, you two. P-please, come in.”

Cumulus favors you with a soft, reassuring smile as she comes to sit next to you. Cirrus plops down on the other side, a hand pushing into the plush red duvet.

“Nice place,” she says, looking around the paneled room, “really elegant.”

“Not my place,” you admit sheepishly, “this is all him.” You point to Copia, who is busy settling into the high backed chair in the corner of the room. He smiles.

“Don’t let her fool you, her room is just as nice. Lots of blues. You’d like it, Cumulus.”

The aforementioned ghoulette laughs quietly, and when she reaches up a hand to brush your hair off your shoulder you want to kick yourself for the way you jump.

“Nervous, angel?” Cirrus asks, flopping backwards onto the bed and letting her fingers dance at the small of your back. You laugh, too loud.

“Y-yeah. Yeah I’m really fucking nervous.”

“What part are you nervous about, sweetheart?” Cumulus asks, shifting her body to face you.

“Uh…everything? The fact that I’ve never been with anyone but Copia, the fact that I’m committing physical infidelity, the fact that you two are so goddamn beautiful, the fact that the man I love is going to be watching…take your pick.”

“Amore, if my presence is causing you any grief I would be happy to le–”

“No,” you say quickly, and you hate the panic in your voice, “No. Please, I need you here. You know how I am, it’s the anxiety. I want to do this for you.”

“For yourself too, I hope,” Cirrus comments from her spot behind you, “unless we’ve been misreading the vibes…?”

“No. Not at all. The vibes are…absolutely there. Incredibly there, in fact. I-I want this,” you look to Cumulus, “I want you. Both.”

“Atta girl,” Cirrus purrs and you don’t even have to look at her to know she’s got a filthy grin curling her lips, “come on, angel. We’ll put on a good show for the Cardinal.”

You look over at Copia, the rapid rise and fall of his chest from the promises of what lie ahead making you ache. Cirrus stands, taking off her shirt in a smooth motion and tossing it to the floor.

“C’mon,” she says, shimmying her shorts and underwear off and climbing onto the bed, “get over here.”

Cumulus snorts as she gets up and you turn, crawling towards Cirrus who is resting against the pillows. When you settle in next to her you finally get a good look at her - all long legs and rounded hips and dusky nipples. You know you’re breathing too loud and then out of the corner of your eye you see Cumulus drop her robe. Cirrus’ chuckle at the whine that comes out of you fans your hair, which she idly twirls between her fingers.

“Perfect, isn’t she?” she asks, looking over at the other ghoulette. You nod. Perfect is an understatement. A rounded belly, large, lush breasts and generous thighs between which are nestled a thatch of white curls. Her tail waves lazily behind her as she uses her hands to trace the path of your gaze. She approaches the other side of the bed and slides in behind you.

“This is pretty,” Cumulus comments, fingers brushing the hem of your blue slip, “keep it on for a little longer, hmm? I like the way it looks on you.”

You nod dumbly and shift to lie on your back. When you do, you catch a glimpse of Copia in the corner. His hand rests in his lap, fingers twitching towards his bulge but he doesn’t touch himself. Not yet. His eyes gleam at you. You’ve got your hands folded on your belly trying desperately not to gawk at either of the beautiful, nude women you’re sandwiched in between.

“Can we touch you?” Cirrus murmurs, ghosting a hand over you.

“Please. Please.”

She smiles and when she lowers her hand to brush against your own you let out a deep exhale. All she’s doing is letting her fingertips glide along the backs of your hands, but it makes you dizzy. When Cumulus reaches down to brush along your thigh, your breath hitches in your throat.

“So sensitive,” Cumulus breathes, dragging her fingers up and over your hip to cradle your belly. You had almost forgotten how the two of them sport a cooling touch - something that comes rocketing back when you feel the almost painful tautness of your nipples. Judging from the low noise that comes out of Cirrus, she’s noticed it too.

“Mmm, pretty little thing,” she purrs, reaching a hand to cup your breast and thumb your nipple through the fabric, “Already so excited for us, ‘Lus.”

“Sure is,” Cumulus agrees, her lips tracing the shell of your ear, “Tell us what you want, angel.”

“K-kiss me. Please.”

“Begs pretty, too,” Cirrus chuckles, “Can’t wait to hear more of that later when I’m making you see stars. Go on, ‘Lus. You’re the one who couldn’t stop talking about her lips.”

Your head turns slightly to face the shorter ghoulette, stomach swooping when she leans in and blows against your lips. You shiver comically and with a smile she reaches a hand up to cup your cheek.

“Ready?” she asks, so softly only you can hear. You nod. When she leans in to capture your lips with hers, you feel as if a dam has broken inside you. All your previous hesitation is gone as you bury your fingers into her curls and pull her towards you, tongue dancing with hers. She’s just as decadent about it as you remember from that day in the archives, soft and yielding as you whimper into each other’s mouths. You’re vaguely aware of Cirrus breathing a curse next to you as Cumulus drapes her body halfway onto yours, hands kneading flesh through fabric. And speaking of fabric–

“This has to come off. Now.” Cumulus groans while pulling away for breath. She’s got one hand gripping the hem of your slip and eagerly shimmying it off your body, pausing to let you lift your hips and sit up to expedite its removal. When the offending garment is finally off, Cumulus skillfully tosses it over to Copia, who catches it with a gasp. You see him press the silk to his cheek, savoring the remnants of warmth from your body and the sight makes you feral.

“Well, well, well, look at you,” Cirrus breathes with a small laugh, “just as soft and lovely as we always knew you would be, right ‘Lus?”

You don’t wait to hear Cumulus’ answer before lunging upwards and slotting your lips against Cirrus’. The taller ghoulette is shocked for only a moment before gripping your thigh and hitching it up on her hip. Where Cumulus’ kiss felt like a dance, Cirrus’ feels like a domination and one you are more than happy to yield to. Teeth chase tongues and when her claws bite into the meat of your waist, you whine into her mouth. When she pulls away you pursue her but she pushes you down into the mattress.

“The Cardinal was right about you,” she grins, “Filthy little thing.”

“If you’re this eager for him, I understand him keeping you from the ghouls,” Cumulus murmurs, “Lucky he likes us best. Shame for the boys, but we’re perfectly fine keeping you all to ourselves.”

“Poor Aether,” Cirrus laughs, “wants you so bad and can’t have you. We promise we won’t be mean and tell him anything about tonight. Much.”

Your head is spinning with arousal, the thought of the ghoulettes tormenting the strong ghoul with sordid details about bedding you causing your clit to throb. Before you can linger on it any further, Cumulus drags her tongue over your clavicle, making you shiver. As if coordinated, both ghoulettes slide down your body until their breath ghosts over your nipples. Your cheeks are hot as Cirrus flicks the tip of her tongue out to graze it. Teasingly she drags the muscle around your areola, avoiding where you want her most and making you whimper pathetically.

“Don’t be cruel, Cir,” Cumulus chastises, placing soft, sucking kisses into the meat of your breast.

“Wanna hear how pretty she begs for me,” she says, smoothing a hand over your belly, “Come on angel, tell me what you want.”

“Suck my tits,” you eke out and Cirrus laughs.

“Oh, the Cardinal’s delicate flower knows how to be direct. I like that,” she pulls back slightly and turns her head to address Copia, “She always this good for you?”

“Better,” you hear Copia rasp and another throb thrums from between your legs.

“Well,” she says, turning her attention back to your breast, “good girls always get what they ask for, right ‘Lus?”

“Then quit talking and fucking give it to me already,” you grit out. Cumulus lets out a delighted noise and Cirrus’ claws bite into your flesh before she drags the flat of her tongue over your hardened nipple. When she finally wraps her lips around the bud and sucks, your hand flies to the back of her head. She’s vicious with her attentions, nipping with sharp canines - Cumulus on the other hand returns to sucking bruises into your other breast, her hand drifting further south. When she firmly cups your mound in her palm a sigh escapes you.

“So good,” you murmur, stroking Cirrus’ dark hair. The tall ghoulette pulls off you with a pop and gives you a grin. Gently, you urge Cumulus back up to face you so you can slide your lips against hers, hand kneading her breast.

“She likes that,” Cirrus breathes, “Loves having her tits played with.”

You moan into Cumulus’ mouth before pulling back for breath. With a firm shove you push the shorter ghoulette flat on her back, dragging your tongue down her sternum. As soon as your lips make contact with her nipple she lets out a whine that goes straight to your cunt. You lap eagerly, rolling her other bud between your fingers as Cirrus settles in behind you to place wet kisses on your shoulder. Out of the corner of your eye you see Copia with his cock in his gloved hand, panting as he stares at you. You’re filled with affection and, with an immense desire to put on a good show for him, you sit up and swing your leg over Cumulus to straddle her. Cirrus falls on her back, clapping as you lower your mouth to sloppily kiss Cumulus.

“Mmm, initiative,” Cirrus purrs, sitting up and delivering a sharp, pleasurable slap to your ass that jolts you forward, “we like that. Keep going, girls. I’ll be back.”

You pull away and grasp for Cirrus, who slides off the bed and reaches to a bag you hadn’t seen either of them come in with. Before you can see what she pulls out, Cumulus grabs the back of your head and pulls you down to where she can drag her teeth along your throat. Her claws scrape at your scalp and you delightedly let her tug you where she wants you. Something about the way her belly presses against yours makes you flush from head to toe. You feel…decadent. Hedonistic. It’s intoxicating and you want nothing more than to show the ghoulette beneath you exactly how good she’s making you feel.

“I know that look,” Cirrus says with a grin, “go on, angel. Make her sing for you.”

I’m going to make you sing, bellezza.

Instantly, you’re taken back to your first night with Copia and you let out a breathy laugh before looking down at Cumulus, who gazes up at you with pupils blown.

“I’ve never done this before,” you murmur and she smiles.

“You’re more familiar with the terrain than you realize. I’ll tell you what feels good, okay?”

You nod and slowly begin to maneuver yourself down her body, kissing and licking every inch of skin available to you. When you settle between her spread thighs and place a kiss to her mound, she lets out a soft sigh. Delicately, you use your thumbs to spread her open and immediately begin salivating when you see how deliciously wet she is. She twitches when your heavy exhale ghosts over her cunt.

“Go on, pretty girl,” you hear Cirrus say encouragingly from behind you, her hands smoothing over your hips. “I’ve got something real special for you.”

As your lips make contact with Cumulus’ slick folds you gasp. Behind you, Cirrus drags the head of what you assume is a silicone cock through your own folds, causing you to arch your back. When you pull away to look back at her she chides you.

“Keep your eyes on the prize, angel. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”

Well. You don’t need telling twice.

With as much fervor as you kissed her, you slide your lips and tongue over her folds, delighting in the way her hand flies to your hair. She’s right, of course, you’re familiar with the general terrain and when the tip of your tongue grazes her swollen clit, she gasps your name. From behind you, you feel the head of the cock drag through your folds again and gently, Cirrus eases the thick tip inside you. You whine into Cumulus’ cunt, hungry for more, but Cirrus holds your hips steady to keep you from bucking backwards.

“Sweet–ah–sweet Aether…used his quintessence on this strap, you know that? Makes it feel like it’s actually a part of me. Poor ghoul had n-no idea who it was going to be used on. Keep going, angel. Want to see you t-take her apart.”

Panting and desperate for her to fill you up, you lower your mouth again to lap up Cumulus’ slick. When your tongue eases inside her she lets out a loud, long moan.

“Good girl,” Cirrus breathes, “g-good–fuck.”

Fuck is right. With agonizing slowness she pushes the strap in and your jaw hangs open at the stretch. Copia is nothing to sneeze at, and he’s thick too, but this you feel in your guts. Your arms wobble as they struggle to hold you up and when Cirrus bottoms out with a groan you let out a pathetic whimper.

“H-how does she feel, Cir?”

You can hear Cirrus panting roughly behind you, hands smoothing over your ass.

“Unholy fucking hell, ‘Lus, hot and wet and t-tight, fuck. I–”

You squeeze around her as hard as you can and Cirrus cuts off with a sharp gasp and a broken moan. When you crane your head to look at her over your shoulder, you give her a grin and she lets out a breathy laugh.

“Oh Cardinal, she’s wicked.”

You hear Copia let out a low chuckle from behind you and it makes your cunt spasm around Cirrus.

“Finish your task, angel,” she coos and you glance up at Cumulus who looks down at you and wets her lips. Feeling deliciously full of both Cirrus’ cock and renewed fervor, you lower your head and slowly drag your tongue though her folds.

“That’s it,” Cirrus murmurs, slowly pulling out of you then pushing back in, “c’mon baby, show her how much you like her.”

So you do.

You’ve got your hands wrapped around Cumulus’ generous thighs, fingers digging hard enough to bruise as you alternate between fucking her with your tongue and circling her clit. Cirrus’ thrusts are deep and forceful, pumping in and out of you while streams of filth slide out of her mouth.

“That’s it, honey,” Cumulus whimpers from above you, burying her fingers in your hair and bucking her hips against your mouth, “so good for me, right there, right–fuck!”

Her praise ceases as you wrap your lips around her clit and suck. Cirrus moans and her pace quickens, fucking into you with less and less abandon. From behind you you hear a strangled amore mio and you know that Copia is close. The visual of his gloved hand wetly sliding along his cock, the taste of Cumulus beneath you, and the mounting pressure of Cirrus’ cock inside you make you feel like you’re going insane. Your moans are muffled, your mouth thoroughly occupied with suckling at Cumulus’ swollen clit while she cries out above you.

“Please, please, please,” she whines, “so close, so fucking close honey, don’t stop!”

You double down and take a page from Copia’s playbook, taking a finger and teasing at her entrance. Slowly, you sink it in knuckle deep and crook it searching for that sweet spot. When she screams your name you know you’ve found it, delighting in the way her cunt clenches around you. When she shatters, she pulls your hair hard enough to hurt but you don’t care, not with the way she whimpers your name like a prayer. The sounds she makes only inflame your passion further and you want nothing more than to wrench another orgasm out of her but suddenly she’s pushing you away. Taking the hint you pull back and suddenly Cirrus’ hand wraps around your shoulder.

“My turn,” she snarls, yanking you towards her and causing your back to arch. Her steady thrusts become sharper, harder, as she pounds into you and makes you see stars. Wrapping her hand around your throat she pulls your back flush against her.

“Look at him,” she growls, her breath hot in your ear, “Look at what you do to him.”

You turn your head to look at your beloved and a gasp hiccups out of your throat. He’s hunched in on himself, gazing up at you with his paints streaked down his face and his mouth hung open in a moan. His hand squeezes at his reddened, leaking cock, hips fucking upwards into his fist. Cirrus holds you in place, her hand seeking your sweat-slick breast to pinch sharply at your nipple as she fucks ruthlessly into you. You cry out, pushing backwards to meet her thrusts.

“I know you’re close, angel,” she groans, hips jackhammering into you hard enough you can’t catch your breath, “mmm fuck gonna–ah–gonna fill this pretty little cunt up. Gonna–ah-ah-fuck, baby!”

“Give it to me, Cir,” you whine, “just like that, j–Copia!”

You cum with a cry, watching as Copia spasms, painting his fist and chest with rope upon rope of his seed. Behind you Cirrus thrusts three times more before you feel her fill you up. You’re trembling in her tight grip as she empties herself into you, her forehead pressed against your shoulder. Copia is looking at you with nothing but pure adoration as you struggle to catch your breath. A silence settles among the four of you and you break Copia’s gaze to look down at Cumulus.

“Beautiful,” she breathes with a wide smile, “fucking beautiful. Look at you.”

You let out a short, delirious laugh and Cirrus mouths weakly at your shoulder.

“You were perfect,” she murmurs into your ear, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, “just like we knew you’d be. Wasn’t she, Cardinal?”

Copia’s head is tipped back against the chair, eyes trained on the ceiling.

“She always is. Always. Amata mia.”

Gently, Cirrus extricates herself from you and the slide of the rigid silicone dildo as it exits your cunt makes you gasp. Weakly, you crawl forwards to Cumulus’ embrace and collapse next to her. Cirrus follows after a moment, slipping in beside you.

“So, how was it?”

Your gaze lingers on the canopy above you and you tip your head to lean against Cumulus.

“Wow,” you say with a dazed smile, “women, huh?”

Cirrus barks out a laugh. You feel your eyelids get heavy as you watch Copia get up and go into the bathroom.

“Don’t fall asleep on us,” Cumulus nudges you, “we’re not done with you yet.”

You whine but you can’t deny the delicious ache coming from between your thighs.

“I’m gonna need a snack, then,” you say with a sigh.

“Anything you want, bellezza,” Copia says, returning to the bedroom, half cleaned up, “I am your servant.”

Hmm. Now that’s a thought.

“Bring me some grapes, a bag of chips, and a pint of ice cream and I’ll show the girls how pretty I look when I bounce on your cock, huh?”

Cumulus lets out a soft gasp and Cirrus’ eyebrows shoot up.

“What flavor?” Copia rasps out, reaching down to adjust the bulge in his pants.

Mmm. You could get used to this.

#curator reader series #cardinl copia x reader #cardinal copia x female reader #cirrus x reader x cumulus #cirrus x reader #cumulus x reader #the band ghost #the band ghost fic #rachel writes

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lemedstudent2021 · 1 month ago

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hiiiiiii :)

so i'm writing some fanfic where the characters get into a plane crash and have to survive on their own with limited medical supplies/knowledge (the characters are age 12-15 but some of them have first aid knowledge to an extent) and i have some Questions (if u don't mind me asking)

(before i start this is SHAMELESSLY inspired by the greys anatomy season 8 finale where the plane crashes)

can you use fire to cauterise open wounds to stop bleeding? or would that just bring further complications?

can you use safety pins as makeshift staples (if you loop them so the skin shuts properly)

the only character who knows how to properly suture needs sutures to stop bleeding out, is it realistic for him to instruct the two other least injured people to suture him up (he can't use his hands) without blacking out from pain?

injuries the characters have: (what is the treatment protocol for each of these?)

one character gets her leg broken with bone exposed (eventually it has to be amputated)

one dislocates his shoulder

one person's hand gets stuck in the debris

someone gets debris in her stomach

one person just has superficial wounds

one character gets debris stuck in her leg

they all have heavy bruising and scrapes as well but those are treatable

things the characters do know how to do:

tie a makeshift tourniquet (advice: do not practise tying tourniquets on yourself because it's quite painful)

suture (one person)

insert a needle into someone's veins (same person)

apply compression bandages to stop bleeding

other super basic stuff (apply plasters, tie an arm sling, etc)

the very basics of cauterising a wound

supplies they have:

tranquiliser guns (limited, and the tranq guns are suited to taking down dinosaurs but they work on humans too)

hand sanitiser and rubbing alcohol (limited)

two basic first aid kits with needle and thread

a knife

cloth to use as bandages and tourniquet material

oxygen (from the plane)

possibly an iv drip???

matchsticks (limited) to make fire to sterilise things and to heat the knife for cauterisation

debris from the plane for splints

food and water (limited)

also how does one put a dislocated joint back into its socket? particularly the shoulder?

sorry if this is super long and for asking so many questions lol. feel free to answer whenever :) and it's completely fine if u don't know (duh) i can research myself but i am sure you're more accurate than a search engine

hope u are having a wonderful day <3

beloved hiiii :D

oooh exciting!! ngl i havent watched any medical shows lol so i dont have any pop culture knowledge (the writing in said shows isnt always the most accurate as u probably already know lol) BUTT tis a famous trope/ au setting so lets see what we got >:)

(also ofc??? love answering ur questions and stuff in general!! and if i dont anything we can always learn together XD)

disclaimer i will be freestyling these okay i dont have any experience in trauma surgery lol but heres what i do got right off the bat:

aight first off cauterisation is indeed used to stop severe bleeding *when all other means have been used* and an open flame is definately not the way to go for tha (burns can be extremely dangerous and a. cause fluid loss and b. increase the risk for nasty infections that can lead to sepsis and death)

instead id suggest heating up metal (like a scrap from the aircraft or sum) via the fire and then applying it to the wound :3

assuming u mean the surgical staples: yes and no? lol obv since this is an emergency there is little space to be picky abt equipment, so honestly safety pins would work ig but i think theyd keep coming loose (oh the agony)

i messed around with one of mine just now and the line that locks into the head (?) is pretty straight so i kinda doubt itll be able to like close flesh the way one imagines it to but its literally fiction lol we can suspend our belief far more than this. as long as its closed properly go for it lmao i give u my blessing XD

yeah sure!! since the patient is awake and aware enough to be able to assess and give instruction i see no reason as to why not lol.

btw in case of an amputation or extremely severe bleeding id recommend using a tourniquet (lots of tutorials online!) to compress the artery and minimise the bleeding :D (ooh maybe u can use the cautery thing here too)

OMG I READ THE FUTURE AHA (my condolences) okay so the amputation will be at the knee level (which afaik is the hardest kind of amputation to perform joint wise lmao. good luck with that) presumably. theyll need a tourniquette as mentioned above, very sharp knife or something to hack away at the flesh and tendons (very tough) and ligaments around the knee socket (even tougher i think). and lots of bandages for the stump

now had they recieived the needed medical attention i doubt theyd need to go up to the knee (there are shin level amputations) but since theyre kids and all alone with no guide or anything idk if theyll be able to save the lower leg bones or even cut though them if they could (i doubt med supplies include saws lol) so yeah thats my reasoning at least.

dislocation is a relatively easy fix (compared to everyhting else lol) but it depends on where the humerus (arm bone) is:

based on which kind of dislocation the direction of pull is determined, but again relatively simple no blood no mess

there are a few maneuvers/ techniques u might want to look up like hippocratic and spaso/ reverse stimson (both for anterior btw)

a hand getting stuck i assume means impaled? oof thats going to hurt. well broken hand bones are pretty rough to deal with in the wild, since all bones need proper realignment to avoid further pain and complications when the body heals itself (did u know that if a fracture heals wrong they have to break it and reset it? yeah.) so im not sure honestly ig it depends on what u have in mind for them

again not too sure what stomach means exactly; are her guts poking out? just bleeding from scratches? depends on what ur going for!! lmk btw and feel free to send more asks ill look up and find what we need to know :D

impaled leg i take it? as the above u need to know what condition shes in exactly like arterial puncture probably means severe bleeding and death honestly, lmk what u have in mind!!

superficial wounds need cleaning and patching up, sometimes if theres like unclean areas of said wounds they need to be scraped off (debridement) esp if theres like scraps or dirt or anything on the wound. what fun!

again for the cautery i think an open flame would heat up the knife much faster than a match lol (also they need to be preserved. also also they wouldnt last long enough i think)

not at all pookie i had so much fun going over everything!! hopefully this is coherent and useful for u ajsdhsjjdhfn

#inbox shenanigans #med stuff #plane crash #emergency first aid

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aalinaaaaaa · 6 months ago

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Author Ask Tag

Thank you to @tildeathiwillwrite for the tag <333

—

What is the main lesson of your story? Why did you choose it?

In reference to Obsidian Sapphires (because that’s the wip whose theme and message I’ve fleshed out the most), the core lesson would be to not let ambitions of grandeur, perfection, divinity, etc derail you from the things you have/the people you love, and that even the most seemingly perfect solutions can still cause tragedy. The central identity of Obsidian Sapphires was always in relation to family, personal identity and the Allaitri Chalice was central to Eshani’s goals even from the first ever draft. This draft focuses on the Chalice and its ramifications as a result of it being openly used in society.

What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding?

A lot of it is inspired by my perspective, my experiences, etc. It draws heavily on certain aspects of my home country, and also some of my own thoughts too. For instance, Helindians being maestros at non-alcoholic fruity drinks derived from my own wish fulfillment! I don’t drink, I’ve never had a drop of alcohol in my life.

It also contains a lot of nature, because it’s a direct contrast to how sterile and corporate the real-world is and I think it really helps make the world very aesthetic, very alluring, somewhere that people would get sucked into and never want to leave. A faerie-style honey trap, if you will.

I'm going to give a specific mention of Morilaste, for it takes a certain amount of its inspiration from Italian art and history. This really became apparent after my visit to Milan and Venice, because I was in awe at the art and architecture. The scale, the details, the artistry, everything. Absolutely stunning. I find that when I'm in or near places like cathedrals and other highly grand, artistic structures, it feels otherworldly. I am awestruck that people made these, that people put funding, time and effort into these grand structures, and we get to benefit from the fruits of their artistry hundreds and thousands of years later. (This is why minimalistic, corporate-hellscape buildings of the modern age break my heart)

And it's that sense of otherworldliness that I want to evoke when designing Morilaste, because I want it to capture the aura of divinity that the court's namesake sought for. I want to use the sheer scale of it to encapsulate just how much of a beautiful, deadly trap it is, and how it contrasts and complements the way ordinary Helindians perceive it from the outside, with basically nothing but rumours and stories to rely on.

What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness or help the reader grow as a person?

Alycja’s trying to prove herself to others, reclaim her innocence in the face of those trying to misconstrue her motives. She wants to be loved, she wants to be admired, and her ordeal is coming at a time when she’s at the start of her teenage years, a pivotal time when she is beginning to flesh out her own identity separate from her identity as part of her family. Her arc is one of the most prominent ones in terms of the theme, because her choices threaten a touch of tragedy almost no matter which path she takes. In a sense, it’s a warning to not let others take advantage of you, and also an affirmation that there is a lot of power in one’s own decisions, even in the face of things that are outside of one’s control.

As for Eshani, she’s also trying to prove herself, but more to repair relations with the people she cares about. She knows what she wants, but her arc is about actually confronting the reality of her desires, and her realising that she wasn’t ready yet. This occurs all while balancing the responsibilities of her current place in life, trying to claw her way out without betraying so many people. She carries a lot of guilt, and the message I want to portray through her endeavour is that the past is the past, it cannot be changed, but the next best thing is to do something now, in the present. Dwelling on what could’ve been is what sets her back, and I look forward to the part where her character development fully clicks into place, I think it’s kinda beautiful (and it fits with the theme and her goals :DDD)

How many chapters is your story going to have?

I’ve an estimate of 30, but this could easily change.

Is it fan fiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Original content, planned to go on my blog :D

When did you start writing?

Wow, it’s been ten, going on eleven years at this stage!

Do you have any words of encouragement for fellow writers of writeblr? What other writers do you follow?

Don’t give up on your ideas! And especially don’t delete them. Stash them away, let them ferment, make sure they’re written down somewhere (and not just on a computer, physical notes are important too). You’ll never know when your ideas may germinate and go full circle. And even if they don’t go anywhere, there’s value even in those ideas just existing. (Side note, people love deleted scenes and snippets!)

I follow so many fantastic, talented, creative writers on here (and I know a decent amount in real life too!), that I would break the tags per post limit so many times over. For the writers that I mention here, consider yourselves tagged for this game, and also here’s an Open Tag for anyone/everyone who wants to answer these <3

@seastarblue @bardic-tales @ominous-faechild @leahnardo-da-veggie @the-ellia-west @vesanal @thebookishkiwi @jev-urisk @cljordan-imperium @ieppiq @angelfevr @gioiaalbanoart @guessillcallitart @thereadingfoz @honeybewrites @oliolioxenfreewrites @theglitchywriterboi @corinneglass @rae-butter @oros-ash3s @mundanemoongirl @scarletteflamerald @midnight-and-his-melodiverse @ceph-the-ghost-writer @flock-from-the-void @tryingtimi @outpost51 @mattresses-and-macaroni @limitlesswritingvoid @agirlandherquill @space-writes @winterandwords @finickyfelix @wintherlywords @druidx @avrablake @inkednotebook @lizardperson @ineedaplacetostay @gaslightwestern @satohqbanana @acertainmoshke @sleepyowlwrites @talesofsorrowandofruin @talesfromaurea @the-golden-comet @bi-focal12 @write-with-will @glassstardust22124 <333

#writeblr #writeblr community #tag game #writeblr tag game #author ask tag #obsidian sapphires #a healing for the birds

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doiliedaze · 3 months ago

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Apple Of My Eye: part 3

Warnings: anxiety, mini anxiety attack, talking about being raped, road-trip, girlfriends who aren’t girlfriends who’re obviously girlfriends who become official girlfriends, lost losers who somewhat hold each other accountable, reassurance, first kiss, cuddling, reader forces Abby to get a matching piercing (if your partner really doesn’t want something don’t force them that shit ain’t cute), rambles of affection

Genre: fluff, angst

A/n: I strongly suggest that if the themes above are too much than don’t read! I’ve never written an anxiety attack but I researched and paid attention to what people have talked about as positive representation of what an actual anxiety attack feels like. I’ve only experienced mild anxiety so I’ll tie in my own personal experiences just to flesh it out. I’m not tying in my own personal experiences with rape hence why I’ll be using they/them referring to the person and I’ll be keeping the details vague in certain areas. I wanted this to be four parts but I was starting to feel like I was stretching it so last part dolls🎉

1 , 2 , 3

───────┈ · ·

Atlanta.

I thought I’d never be back in this horrid city. There’s a lot that it has to offer but it can suck your soul; it definitely took mine.

Abby is still running I can see it in her eyes, but who am I to judge I’m just the same.

She suggested staying with my family but I don’t even want them to know I’m here. Thank the heavens she knew not to push and we stayed in a hotel. I’ve actually been to this one before. It was for a birthday party!

There are some memories here I’d hold onto but one shadows the others.

Abby’s gently shakes me as she notices I’m zoning out, “what’s on your mind sugar?”

Her words alone make me tear up, “im just ready to get these five days over with.” Her fingers gently move up to hold my cheek, “we don’t have to stay here if you don’t want to.”

“That’ll be too easy!” I sigh as I lay back. I can tell my attitude is off-putting but my energy is drained. Running is all I’ve done, so to just spend a couple days here will prove something to myself. That I can live again.

Abby lays on me, her presence comforting me. My hands graze her back slowly as I try not to sniffle.

“You don’t have to prove anything y’know?” She whispers as her fingers entangle with mine.

“I know” I mumble biting my lip, “but I want to…”

“You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. You try so hard at everything you do even if you’re uncomfortable! I know it’s corny to say but it’s true.”

I chuckle slightly, “you sound like you’re on a tv show” she snorts, “my advice is that bad?” I nod knowing regardless her advice always makes my chest feel warm. “Seriously though thank you” I wipe my eyes and squeeze her hand. “You’re welcome” she whispers and presses a soft kiss to my forehead.

A warm smile spreads across my face, “let’s go see Atlanta.”

With that came a whirlwind of me dragging Abby everywhere like a lost puppy. She gets distracted by everything and especially if it’s something to read. At times her spacial awareness can be low to say the least.

I showed her so many of the places I use to hang-out at! We were roaming the whole day and I almost forgot about all my anxieties.

Atlanta truly shines in the night, despite all the hooka smoke and bad weed lingering in the air.

“Wanna do something impulsive?” I say, as we sit at a red light on the way back to hotel. She hums in response slightly turning her head to me. She’s so serious when she drives.

“Let’s get matching piercings!” She laughs in my face, her stoic expression melting away. “Absolutely not!”

That absolutely not turned into her squeezing the life out of my hand as it was her turn to get her belly buttoned pierced. She looks at me and mouths, “I could almost hate you” and I mouth back, “you never could” and she chuckles.

“See that wasn’t that bad!” I say as we walk out, “my stomach feels like it’s paralyzed!”

“You’re so dramatic!”

“Says the queen of drama please!” She rolls her eyes and she struggles to get the keys out her pocket.

“Says the girl who forced me to go Seattle and cried in the rain?”

“Too soon” she laughs as she gets into the car slowly. I was about to get into the car when I felt the need to turn around. My body felt like there was eyes boring into the back of me so sneaking I peak over my shoulder.

Dread fills my chest. It looks like them but I’m not sure. I don’t want to stare to be sure. My body betrays me as it doesn’t move. My knees feel my jelly and my heart is thumping in my throat. I feel a twitch in my fingers and my eyes burn.

It doesn’t take Abby to realize I’m not in the car and she comes in my line of sight. She moves to hold my shoulders and in an instant it feels as though my body will operate with me instead of against me.

Shakily I back away, “I’m okay just don’t touch me please” instantly she puts her hands up and says. “Did something happen?” I just shake my head no and get in the car.

The ride back was silent and swift. Her eye peeking over at me any chance she got. I am trying to keep my breathing even and gnawing at my cuticles.

As soon as we entered the room, I head into the bathroom to splash some water on my face.

I felt like a freak, like I just ruined the day. Hell this whole trip! I couldn’t even realize I started crying until I felt Abby wrap herself around me.

Typically this sudden touch would send me in a frenzy but at this moment it’s what I need. I wrap my arms around hers and squeeze with all my might.

My eye line is blurry and my head is pounding. All the emotions I’ve been holding is getting stuck in my throat like vomit. My legs give out and she sits us on the floor. Sobbing I curl into her.

Her scent, that scent I become so enchanted by now feels like a safety net. Her breathing soothes me as I blink away tears and try to match it. Moments like this I wish I could nuzzle into pumpkins soft fur or rub biscuits head to calm myself down.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She whispers when she sees I’ve calmed down. In total honesty I don’t but I should.

“Abby I-” was all I could get out before a sense of shame washed over me. I’ve never talked about this with anyone in great detail. My worst fear is her view of me shifting…or mine of hers. What if she thinks I deserved it? What if she hurts me too? It’s not in her character but I didn’t think the same about them at first.

“We don’t have to right now…or ever okay?”

Quickly I shake my head no, “I want to just…this is new okay?”

She gives me a curt nod. I let the silence fill the room until I felt the weight lift a little.

“There was a person…who looked like someone I use to know.” I say as I tuck my head into her slightly but not enough to where she wouldn’t be able to hear me.

“That person and I were close. I would go to them about everything and we’d talk everyday. They just became apart of my routine. Now as you know I don’t like to drink it just doesn’t make me feel good.” I pause as I felt a ramble about to come and she gave me a gentle squeeze of encouragement.

“One night we were at their place and we were on the couch, huddled up which wasn’t new for us. They kept suggesting to try this drink, and that drink. At first I really didn’t want to but I took a different sips then my stomach just started to hurt. Obviously I didn’t have enough to get drunk not even tipsy but it made me feel weird. I couldn’t really understand why because I don’t know my limits with alcohol. Regardless I expressed this and they suggested for me to go lay down; which I did. Next thing I know they are on top of me and…well after that I isolated myself. Everywhere reminded me of something and I couldn’t take it anymore! So I prayed and prayed for an answer on what to do and then my pops wanted to stop running the farm. It was my opportunity to start over!”

I move out of her arms so I could sit up and face her, “I understand that it wasn’t my fault and I shouldn’t have internalize it and project it onto Atlanta or anyone trying to be something in my life but I…I just didn’t have the strength and I so desperately want it Abs.”

There was a slew of emotions across her face. She took a deep breath struggling to find her words. “There’s strength in getting away. Trauma can haunt you in unspeakable ways, there’s no weakness in knowing when to walk away.”

There was a silence that fell over us…again. “So…it wouldn’t be horrible if we leave?”

“No sugar, you came back and you tried. That’s all that matters.” She said as we both slowly rise.

We were silent packing up and signing out. The wind howls as we settled into the car. This time leaving Atlanta doesn’t feel as bad. Like Abby said I tried and that’s what mattered. I finally got a part of it off my chest. With that and the hum of the radio, I was lulled to sleep.

The drive is long, it’s almost twelve hours and Abby is persistent on not letting me drive. I’m fine with that as long as we take stops! We don’t stop in Alabama but we do stop in New Orleans.

Definitely stocked up on food and gave us an idea for a later trip!

The pit stops to clean our piercings were definitely a highlight in my book!

When we arrive back at the house it was mid afternoon and my grandpa knew we were coming so he prepared a meal for us.

He stayed with us till nightfall and I felt a weight of awkwardness fall over us. We’ve talked about everything besides where we stand together.

If there’s only one thing I learned on this trip, it’s that I’m braver than I think. We’re on our spot, cuddled up on the porch swing.

As I was going to talk so did she. We erupt into laughter and smiles. She wraps her arm around me slowly and I grab her hand to let her know she can hold me tight.

“So…I guess we both have something to say?” I say looking up at her. “You should go first.” Her cheeks red and her gaze soft.

“I think you need to go first, you look like you’re gonna explode with anxiety!” I nuzzle my face against her hand.

She swallows slowly before saying, “I like you…a lot and I would love for you to give me a chance? I’d understand more now than ever if you don’t feel the same way or-”

I cut the poor thing off by kiss her gently. I place my free hand on her chest pulling her collar some. Abby’s shoulders drop and her fingers entangle into mine.

Her lips are soft and her kiss is timid. When I move to pull away her face follows mine. Her eyes wide with an unwavering gaze.

“Is that a yes or?”

“Yes Abby of course!” I laugh, “I’d never just kiss you if it wasn’t!”

“You never know it could’ve been a trail kiss!”

“That’s not a thing…”

“Says who? I could see that being a thing.”

I roll my eyes at her nervous ramble excuse of flirting. It’s corny but it works on her.

As the stars peek out more and more and the air whistles, I relax myself into the arms I never knew would become my safety.

───────┈ · ·

A/n: dolls this series was so emotional for me to write (hence why it took forever for me to get this one done) and I just hope someone enjoyed it and found some comfort in it🫶🏿

Taglist: @manfuckthisimout @bambishaven @femme-historian @furrytaesss @milanyas @highnfemme @5seos

Dividers- @dollywons

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coriphallus · 8 months ago

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DA: The Veilguard Spoiler Review pt3 - Politiks

oh my little void in this world wide web, we are really in it now.

a little PSA before you read this word vomit, i am from westernmost middle east, and that will inform much of what i know about the topics i discuss. i wont know about race politics of america or the intricacies of it beyond what i can see online but as an immigrant i do have some perspective on western experience. so when i talk about heavy topics it will come from a foreign place. i do understand and admit that i cannot ignore that BW is a north american studio and that colours every theme they touch.

so there are two angles to approach this, 1st is to assess DAV on its own and 2nd is to assess it as a part of a whole and continuation of a franchise.

lets get 1st out of the way, its safely uncontroversial beyond taash's story. and eff-plays voiced my feeling verbatim on that subject more succinctly than anything i can possibly write.

2nd is very, very grim.

every DA game that came before had been interlaced with politics of its world so severely that its absence is disorienting. every game you were given the choice to change the political landscape of the countries youre playing in, for better or for worse. even the 2nd game with its vastly smaller scale sees hawke trying to navigate through their life as an immigrant, even at the games climax you are given a choice to drastically alter how this uprising will be remembered and it tells hawke that there are no half measures, they need to pick a side.

"Slavery or no, flesh is always for sale."

in my very first DAV playthrough i picked a shadow dragon elf, i didnt give her any backstory as i though being an elf in minrathous would shape her world view regardless.

first scene i got when organising my room rook pulls out the SHACKLES of a slave shes freed as she reminisces about how much good shes done, and puts them on her bedside. then proceeds to talk to a book and say "everybody looks down on elves but we were here first >:c"

(at this point i rerolled my character so i dont yet know how shadow dragon background plays out.)

at the very beginning of the game we see similar shackles and varric informs us that solas hates slavery, hes been freeing them.

when we make it to minrathous we learn that these people in neves circle have been freeing slaves.

alright so, the heavy handed deliveries aside, what purpose do all these scenes/expositions serve?

well, it makes these people look good. we know theres slavery in this part of thedas and these people are fighting against it not by any elaborate means but dont worry kitten <3.

[i had to look up the english for some of these terms so feel free to correct me if im wrong] patterson describes slavery as "one of the most extreme forms of the relation of domination, approaching the limits of total power from the viewpoint of the master, and of total powerlessness from the viewpoint of the slave". death of the soul, death of what makes one human -and for the purposes of this section- death in the eyes of state. slavery has such a long history that predates early modern colonization of africa by thousands of years. it is a staple of human history and where we have come from shapes what we are now. we can shun it, call it abhorrent but we cant pretend it never happened. theres always been people dead in the eyes of state.

heres the uncomfortable truth, there aint never been enough steel in the world to hold every hittite or mittani slave. to assume slavery is people getting abducted and put to irons is as naïve as human trafficking being a rando ruffying you and hauling you across the sea in a crate. yea, it could happen but 99% of the time its just a waste of time to physically hold someone against their will by force. and this idea makes us think its this far off thing that happened thousands of years ago by bad individuals doing very comically bad things, which is a very deliberate choice, because to depict period accurate slavery would be to portray social and economical classes, and that would be confronting how little we've changed in certain aspects.

people were born into that caste, shaped by it, worn down by it, and abused by it systematically.

in DAI Dorian says something -apparently- very controversial that i dont think this fandom has fully unpacked, and i aint gonna do that here either because im not remotely qualified. he likens the working class of south to slavery of north, theres no way to engage with this argument in any meaningful way, even as an elf, and in general people brush it off as dorians pro-slavery rhetorics.

try as DAV might to disregard, we actually did meet an ex-slave and trafficking victims on three separate occasions, and the games have set a premise already. we got to talk about their unique circumstances, and they were handled with some measure of dept. maybe you liked them, maybe you didnt, but you knew them and that makes a difference. they had agency in their own stories. a far cry from DAVs nameless faceless props for righteous gentiles to circle jerk about.

but, sure, lets tell ourselves showing them would be too gratuitous.

can you imagine how batshit insane it would look if zevran kept the belt her husband used to beat isabela with as a trinket, to display in his tent? that scene with rook disturbed me more than most anything in this entire franchise and coming from an anders supporter, thats saying something.

this is how little the writers were willing to engage with their source material. this is how little they are willing to engage with the world around them.

which makes the next blunder inevitable.

alot has been said about the absurdity of elves feeling responsible for the events of DAV, but maybe this hasnt been said enough; this is a blatant fascist rhetoric.

i will spell it out though, even though i never thought it needed to be said, the social performance of accountability indicates that the party who has done harm has benefited and continues to benefit from that harm, this is why reparations are paid, and thats what "check your priviledge" means. elves in DA have never benefited in any way from the warmongering of evanuris, they were enslaved by them.

to say that these people should feel some sort of responsibility towards what befell dwarves is a fascist rhetoric used irl to offload responsibility and divide and alienate the opposition further from eachother.

i cant tell you if this mouth piece is same everywhere but i know a few people who have clocked it immediately so im gonna assume it was obvious. and truthfully, i wouldnt even be annoyed if i thought it was intentional. genuinely, one of my favourite games is an unapologetic military propaganda whos protagonist would make ayn rand write sonnets about, and the game knows what it is. but no, i fully believe the studio tried to address the criticism they got about their lackluster handling of elves and either completely misunderstood or willfully disregarded the experiences of marginalised peoples that the games drew inspiration from.

the writing is so hollow beyond horrible dialogue that when writing an enby character whos also multicultural they didnt even notice the parallel theyve created. i know this because after an entire plotline about their struggle with binaries their story concludes with a binary decision on their culture. this just confirms to me that any dept this game has is completely accidental.

imma level with yall i dont subscribe to the belief that you need to have some type of experiences to write some type of characters and i find that "ofc a white person wrote it so..." response very tired because yea we should be allowed to expect more from white people. i too had OCs of different cultures that i wasnt very familiar with and handled poorly, but unlike me, a company can afford a consultant.

i played greedfall recently, and sure the maori tattoos were a shit decision, and im disappointed that after all the criticism they still stuck with it, and yes maybe its story was not sensitive enough but you know what? as the person whos recommended it to me said, i rather have a story who boldly engages with its own themes than one whos terrified of them. say what you will about its shortcomings but at least at the end of that game you can have an ending where the colonizers leave for good, and yes their plague is not healed but the narrative doesnt punish the natives for their isolationism. i am glad that the game allows that catharsis to its players.

DAV could have had 300 well thought-out endings and still not please everyone, but the endings they chose to include directly implicates the group theyre trying to appease and its literally just people who either want to punch or kiss solas, thats how fucking deep they think their fanbase it. not the people who wanted to end slavery, or achieve equilibrium with beings no matter how alien they are. or people who wanted to see a culture connect with its roots etc etc.

and maybe they were right, many people have been enjoying this game immensely and i am just, so fucking jealous. i wish i liked this game and enjoyed it and didnt want to tear out my hair every second i spent in treviso. i wish i wasnt seething white knuckling my sink like an insane person when a little kid wrote to crow rook that hes recruiting orphans now. i wish i had any belief in this game to read that as satire.

at least i wish i felt any form of vindication when i immediately realised this game was going to be a soulless cashgrab that unashamedly uses the name of a popular IP to push a sub-par product earlier this year, i just spend 80+ hours watching a company parade the carcass of a franchise i loved and beat it like a pinata as it continuously slapped me on the face with a botched wax figure of it.

i just feel this profound sense of sadness. i wish this game didnt exist. and no i dont feel any kind of brand loyalty, even when i actively enjoyed their work i didnt but i definitely dont now, not after 3 consecutive games that theyve delivered with more or less the same problems. as the company is today, i dont care whether bw survives or not, its been made clear time and again that the bw i liked is long gone and bw today is clearly not interested in making games for me.

even as i write this i dont feel fuelled by my anger for DAV but by the love a have for what came before. i still think the story deserved better, the fans deserved better, the people who contributed into making DA universe what it was before DAV deserved better. and, as rook told harding, our anger is justified.

but, hey. hair looks really good.

#veilguard critical #da:tv spoilers #bioware critical #personal #tw: abuse #tw: slavery #long post

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simpingforbots · 7 months ago

Note

Hello! I'm kinda new here in your blog and I saw those "what if a human ended on Cybertron" and I just love those stories they're so good

No need to do it now cuz idk if you are taking requests but could you make More of them? A part 6 with souls prime and amalgamous prime

hello there! thanks for letting me know that you like my stories and i will try my best as i am sort of new to Transformers. i got in to transformers thanks to Bay movies, Transformers prime, transformers animated and now Transformers One. So please forgive me if i might be incorrect. i will do my best.

What if human ended up in Transformers one.

part 6 (requests)

Solus Prime

(reade in this situation are female)

Being the first fembot of Cybertron is nothing easy, especialy when you have this much weight on your shoulders. Even if she found joy in creating things, the constant need for weapons was becoming exhausting. thankfully Megatronus were there to comfort her, even if they had some fights here and there, it was something good. So when something small and week showed up on surface of Cybertron, being chased by Quintessons, the injustice towards such pathetic creature fired Solus right up and they took care of those pathetic, ugly, disgusting bug creatures. They smashed them all with their hammer, letting their fiery side out along with all the frustration, all while YOU scrambled for safety to let those huge creatures duke it out. Though you did not stayed hidden for long as you wanted. A servo reached in to the hiding spot you were in, apparently not small enough for them to reach in at all, easily puling them out. After expecting this small creature they were shocked to see that it was as same frame as her, meaning she must be not the only fembot, even if in weird fleshy body. A small creature with no clear way of defending them self against harsh environment of Cybertron. So she takes you with to Iacon to keep you safe from anything dangerous and started working on creating something to help communicate. it is a bit hard as your little chirps were hard to decipherer, but signs were easy to learn. And let's just say you were also subjected to her little experiments as now SHE had a whole new reason to create.

Amalgamous Prime

Being the most unserious of all thirteen, Amalgamous felt a bit out of place time to time. he just wanted others to be a bit more... unserious all the time, this constant monogamy of data pads, meetings and fighting was surreally exhaustion for every one. He did felt a bit jealouse a bit of Solus and Megatronus since they started seeing each other, even if it was "privet secret" between 13 primes, he still wanted something else. He would venture to surface time to time, just exploring away, watching strange deer creatures "graze". Or change in to something else and joing his "subject" and wonder around Iacon. he found you in one of dark markets that he knew was illegal, yet still something about you caught his single optic. Purchasing you along with some book about "hoomans" he returned to the palace, knowing that now he had something to break the rutine. At first it was hard as you most of time hid away, to scared, but overtime you grew used to this strange bot, snickering quietly at his "tricks". after some time you were comfortable enough to laugh along side him at his little pranks.

Zeta Prime

So much responsibly for one bot - having matrix of leadership, being leader of 13 Primes, taking care of entire civilization and defending them from quinteson will be a tool to any one, no mater if they were born to do this. at first Zeta refused to believe that HE - the matrix bearer - was tiered, but in the end no one can escape the truth. It did not helped that a suden raid on Quintessons ship brought a small flesh being in to his existence. so much needed to be done so taking care of something so small and fragile was really not in his plans. But he was sort of stuck with you and just kept you in a cage, for your own safety of course, he does not want any bot to step on you by excident. If you behaved and did not flipped him off or yell something in strange language - you would be reworded by being let out of the cage and let to wonder his table while he was buissy. He would drift away from data pads just to play with you, rolling pen between him and you, chuckling seeing how hard you had to push just to roll it towards him, or simply watch you doodle inside one of the pads he would push towards you, giving the smallest pen he could find to doodle in, finding that it was one of a few ways you can communicate with him through doodles. and apparently he has a new name - Crown, about which he did not complain about.

part1 part2 part3 part4 part5

#transformers #transformers x reader #transformers one #transformers x human

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peggyao3 · 10 months ago

Text

Relic - Pt. 10 "Fettered Flesh"

PAIRING: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Unnamed Ambiguous FMC

SUMMARY: ✧ Dreams are messages from the deep ✧

A woman from the unknown comes to Feyd in his dreams and his nights become his days as he flees to the dreamscape to escape the nightmares that haunt his waking hours.

TAGS: 18+, smut, she/her AFAB FMC, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, oral sex, Porn with Plot, Feyd-Rautha's black cum and big cock, Praise Kink, Body Worship, angst/hurt and comfort, drama, fluff, Frank Herbert would frown, some politics, implied/referenced (child) abuse❗, Trauma, mentions of suicidal thoughts❗, Healing, Strangers to Lovers, falling in love, Vulnerable/Emotional/Possessive Feyd, Feyd is a sweet baby who did nothing wrong and I WILL pamper him, nurture not nature, Stockholm Syndrome but in a consensual way, lucid dreaming, implied/referenced cannibalism❗, Murder, Female rage, Teaching the Universe about Feminism, Angst with a Happy Ending

WORD COUNT: 5k

A/N: HELLO PRECIOUS PEOPLE 💕 Shit hits the Giedi Prime fan, so get out your umbrellas!! I feel like with every chapter I'm getting more excited 🥹 And everyone who has left a comment is to blame 😭 I appreciate it so greatly 😭 I've recently started an internship thingy (in a manner of baby's first real job experience lmao), so I have a bit less time to write, but chapter 11 and 12 are finished already, so I do have a bit of food in stock 💪

Reposted from my Ao3 💕| Masterlist | Relic Masterlist

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

← Previous Chapter, Next Chapter →

Day 5

Jealousy is a beast, but loneliness is a monster.

Jealousy ignites with fiery tendrils but loneliness drowns you slowly until you're staring up from the bottom of the pitch black sea, yearning for the light.

All day she's been mulling over the three woman-creatures, Feyd's "pets". What is it that infuriates her the most? The physical violence? The fear of what they might have done to her - Death, torture or worse? Their derogatory status? Their beastliness grafted into female bodies, paired with the fact that Feyd has been bedding them at some point?

Without thinking about it, and perhaps it is tactless, she has been pouring her heart out to Lilia while the attentive handmaid is treating her scabbed injuries from last night. Now it is evident that wound management is a well-needed skill around the Harkonnen palace. The sarcophagus is safely folded up and her new weapon is tucked into one of the compartments.

"Am I overreacting?!" She asks, even though - hell no - she knows she isn't, but a part of her soul yearns for human connection, affirmation, camaraderie, friendship. It feels so good to be talking to someone who is not the man she thought she knew or the belittling Bene Gesserit sisters.

"Hmm," Lilia begins tentatively and the glowglobe light brings out the unusual color of her eyes as she tilts her head, so amber that they almost appear golden. "While I'll say it's never been common for the na-Baron to practice monogamy… I'll also say that I'd be quite furious at my husband if he had three women on the side." Her voice quivers upon women, as if it repels her to describe the three beings as such. The spider in the Baron's throne room may be the most harmless monster to roam these halls.

The engineer's questions chip away and it becomes perfectly clear that it's the jealousy that cuts the deepest, even with her superficial wounds cared for, a blade is wedged inside her guts that will keep on cutting.

"And do these 'pets' have handmaids too?" A self-destructive question to determine where her own status truly lies. What's a bride but another pet to him?

"They used to have handmaids…" Lilia hesitates. "But they always ended up eating them. I'm glad to be assigned to you, my Lady."

Great. There she has another horror to add to the menagerie.

Lilia continues: "If it calms you, I doubt there will be any further incidences with them. The na-Baron has been in an, uhm, unstable mood since last night." The maid's posture turns rigid. She shouldn't be speaking about the na-Baron like that, but the Earth woman's emotions are contagious. Lilia will get herself killed if she's not careful. She's been telling that to herself since she was a little girl.

"Unstable, uh-huh, well so am I."

The Harkonnen woman nods and decides it is best not to elaborate on what it means when Feyd-Rautha is having the worst day of his life.

Vladimir Harkonnen chuckles with delight at his nephew's distress and the infantile killing spree that has been painting the halls black since last night.

It took even less time than he expected, for the new woman to be disgusted by his poor nephew and he cannot hold it against her. Feyd-Rautha is a raging child in an unfortunately manly body.

The Baron is well-entertained by the hollow screams that blare down the hallways. First the three harpies. A shame, they had helped keep Feyd settled so nicely and they hadn't been cheap either. It's also a shame that the Bene Tleilax don't offer bulk discount, considering the number of Gholas the Baron saw himself forced to commission for the little game his nephew and he have been playing.

Next on Feyd's blade was the guard at his little witch's door, then anyone who crossed his path in the night, all the while Feyd was chafing with desire to be cut and hurt. But no one outside of the ring is allowed to raise their blades against the Baron's heir apparent, unless instructed by the Harkonnen sovereign himself.

Some fire has returned to his nephew since the woman's arrival and he appreciates that, yes, he does, but he will keep a sharp eye on the two of them. He has no doubt that she's a Bene Gesserit agent who has implanted phantasms in Feyd-Rautha's mind, but Vladimir is willing to play the sisterhood's game, for his nephew's sake, even though he had sworn to never let a witch enter his fortress again.

Not since Lady Margot Fenring had tried to steal his lovely boy's precious seed. Luckily, Feyd's blade had worked quicker than the thief's vocal chords.

But Valdimir is willing to adapt. The boy had been boring him to death for the past two years and he used to be so entertaining and feisty!

In the evening hours after a night and day of bloodshed, Feyd still has stamina (a trait the Baron cherishes so dearly about his nephew) and comes barging into the guarded dining room, bringing with him the cloying scent of blood that sticks to the tacky soles of his boots. He wears the clothes of yesterday and blood lust in his eyes.

Careful now.

Vladimir gives no sign to the guards, chews without haste and takes a noisy gulp of wine, making sure a bead rolls down the folds of his massive neck. The muscle at his nephew's jaw twitches and his fingers strangulate the blood-slick handle of his blade.

The eight arm-legged arachnid creature shivers in its basket under the table, eager to get to Feyd, partly because his boots smell yummy, but it doesn't dare move away from the Baron's feed. Smart thing.

"Don't look at me like that. It's not my fault that she doesn't like you, boy."

Feyd halts as if struck by one of the bolts of infrared lightning that cook the atmosphere during the summer months. Tension strains his neck, a bull ready to charge at his Matador and for a second the Baron thinks he'll have to switch on his shield ring. But his nephew turns and barges off with bouncing, stomping steps, draining his stamina and wetting his knives on everything that breathes, when the only one he really wants to kill sits fat and mighty on his throne.

It's almost cute, Vladimir thinks. The boy could kill him so easily now, if he really put his cunning, little mind to it. He's strong enough, smart enough, but his spirit - that's the crux. Feyd's spirit is broken and riddled with fear of the punishments. The last time he tried was at 17 and then never again.

Ah-h-h, yes, the Baron has conditioned him well and he considers it his retirement plan. Age hasn't left the Harkonnen sovereign unscathed and while his mind may still be sharp (or else how would he have come up with such a genius plan!), his morbidly obese body fully relies on the protection of his shield ring, guards, lung machine and poison snoopers. But as long as the boy still fears him, the deadliest threat within these halls remains on a pretty, silver leash.

The fire of jealousy has dwindled down and now all she does is miss him, sitting lonely in her room, lonely on this planet, lonely in the universe with only inanimate objects and the virtual messages and images of dead people to keep her company. None of this can ever compare to the warm hands of her beloved and his smile, the roundness of his cheeks and his painted teeth. She misses the way his eyes used to crinkle just for her. He had made her believe that only she could make him smile and offer a sliver of peace to his soul.

It's been two years since their last dream. Why wouldn't he have taken other women?

He said he "hasn't touched them". Since when? Since he learned she's alive? Since their first dreams? Ever?

She regrets now that she denied him when he knocked on her door an hour ago. The bitter guilt of disgracing oneself crawls over her when she slowly moves towards the door, but her self-respect has cauterized and become cinders along with her fury. Feeling sick to her stomach, she places her hand on the panel and the heavy door slides open.

Finding herself face to back with a guard in bulky plate armor, she halts. She wouldn't know where exactly to find Feyd's room anyway. The man turns on his heels and salutes briskly before returning his hand to the hilt of his saber.

"Good evening. Ah, wait, are you… New?" She blurts out, not meaning to seem disrespectful. The Harkonnens often do look quite alike to her, but she could have sworn the old guard was a little shorter.

"Yes, my Lady." The man looks right above the crown of her head, avoiding her eyes.

"What happened to the other guard?"

"He was replaced, my Lady."

That does make sense and she's almost a little relieved. She wouldn't want anyone who'd let these bloodthirsty creatures inside to guard her and her most valuable possession. However, she still hopes this incident won't ruin his chances of employment indefinitely.

"I see." She glances cautiously down the austere corridor. Past the windows, there is only blackness and the occasional faraway rumble from the factories. "Do you have to stand here all night? Your feet must be hurting. What about a chair?"

"I'm not allowed such luxuries."

"Says who? You can't excel at your job while being overworked and your feet are aching in those boots."

The man wonders if the na-Baron's Lady wishes to insult or test him. "I am at full capacity, my Lady!" He salutes again. "I have no complaints about my boots."

"Fine, alright. Could you please point me the way to Feyd's room then? I want to see him. No need to accompany me, I'm sure I'll find it, just make sure no one enters my room, please?"

"Sorry!" The man extends his arm to the side, stopping her advance around him without laying a finger on the Lady. "The na-Baron has ordered this door to be sealed unless he or your handmaid demand entrance."

"Well I don't demand entrance, I want to exit. I want to see Feyd."

The guard grows queasy. That scenario was not included in his instructions. To be fair, the briefing for his new position can be considered rudimental at best but he didn't complain. Up here has been the safest spot in the palace tonight. "The na-Baron doesn't welcome visitors in his private quarters."

"But I'm his…" She swallows uncomfortably. "Betrothed, or am I not?"

"You are, my Lady."

"So, couldn't you perhaps call him?"

The poor guard's expression says 'I'd rather not'. The na-Baron has only just settled, finally, and even the dumbest desert rat knows not to wake a sleeping tiger. All evening long he's been wondering how many of his comrades will be dead come the morning and he doesn't want to be the next one to become fodder for the slaves' food rations. "I'm sorry, my Lady. It is against the protocol to disturb the na-Baron at night unless there is an emergency. Is there an emergency?"

"No…" The woman's expression twists into defeat and she pads backwards with slackened shoulders and somber eyes. "I'm sorry to have bothered you."

The door slides shut and she is too sad to even be angry about her gentle imprisonment. There's nothing out there for her anyway, except for Feyd, and if he doesn't want to see her…

Self-destructive thoughts sprout from the cinders in her chest and grow into the wildest phantasms. The guard was too kind to tell her Feyd has visitors in his room. Perhaps he explicitly decreed that she is not to join him.

To prevent herself from hurtling into a bottomless spiral, she must find a distraction. Nearly choking on bitter tears, she opens up the virtual app drawer that she's most familiar with and selects the 3d-modeling tool. A nice, little task to keep her thoughts from straying is exactly what she needs, and so she settles down on the bed and begins to design a practical, foldable, printable chair for her guard, thoughtfully optimizing stability and the required resources.

The engineer doesn't notice when her tears dry, but they do.

Day 6

She sleeps awfully that night, despite the chip's helpful sleeping program consisting of gentle rain and soothing frequencies. It can't have been much longer than two hours when she is awoken by a knock on the door, followed by another, more insistent one a moment later.

The 3d-modeling interface still overlays reality when her eyes snap open and her sluggish brain activity requires a moment to shut it down. She was almost finished with the printable chair parts last night, but she must have dozed off eventually.

The knocking persists and she calls: "Lilia?"

A pause. "It's me." An unmistakable, deep and raspy voice comes muffled from the other side. Feyd-Rautha, freshly showered and dressed in a clean, casual suit, leans his forehead against the cool, thick plastic, breathing hard and fast so that his respiration condenses on the door. Waiting, he pleads silently for mercy. He cannot do this anymore, doesn't want to kill anymore just to feel something other than fear.

She freezes, legs half swung off the mattress as anxiety twists her belly. All of her jealousy comes crashing back and a little demon whispers poison in her ear: Go back to your hyenas and toy around with them, not me!

When silence is the answer to Feyd's timid greeting, his stomach drops as if filled with lead. Blood pounds in his ears like the war drums on his birthdays and his breath becomes shallow, so that he no longer even hears the guard's antsy shuffling. What will he do if she never forgives him?

A harrowing need for violence flashes through him cold and dark and his twitching hand jerks for the blade at his hip but the door rushes open before he can brandish it and his woman faces him with crossed arms, her face puffy from sleep but her eyes are wide and vulnerable.

She beckons him to enter and he follows, eyes racing to the crowns of thorns in the vase, the sarcophagus, the ruffled bed, everything the way it was. How does she deal with pain?!

"Hello," Feyd mumbles, voice reduced to a tiny, grated whisper.

"Hello."

"Can we… talk?"

The relic nods and waits, clammy fingers clutching her sleeves. But then Feyd says… nothing. His eyes are focused on an imaginary point somewhere behind her navel and his jaws strain as if chewing a brick.

So, she begins: "I'm sorry, but I was very upset." She paces, shoulders drawn up. "I know that customs are different around here, I mean, they obviously are," she guffaws quietly and shakes her head. "But where I'm from, it requires consent to have more than one partner and I never gave you that consent. I've never given my consent to anything that's happened to me since I woke up! And then I found out you're alive and I can be with you and I really believed everything would finally be better, but you-" Her voice hiccups. "I'm very upset, okay?" Her lips twist and she lifts a hand to her mouth, sobbing quietly into her palm. "You're so different in real life."

Feyd's frozen limbs regain their agility and he jumps to her side as she tries to turn away, a swift predator despite his anguish. He clutches her by the arms. "Wait! Remind me. H-How was I in our dreams?"

"I- I don't know, you looked happy." Her arms burn where he's holding onto her with his broad palms and long fingers. "And you were kind."

"Have I not been kind to you?"

"To me, yes. But being kind only to me is not enough." She shakes her head bitterly.

"What do you want me to do?"

"Be honest with me. Who are these three?! They said you don't play with them anymore like you used to, and they hurt me, Feyd!" She writhes out of his clenched fists and he lets her because when her fingers skim his wrists, all his muscles go weak. She yanks up her shirt, showing off the healing gash on her waist.

Feyd wants to kill his darlings all over again and his sinful mouth twists into anger. "They used to be my pets. Pleasure slaves, if you will. Just some meaningless toys, nothing more, I swear it to you."

"Pleasure slaves!" She blurts out, shaking her head. At least he's being honest but - what the fuck?! "You-" Stumbling over her own words, she backs away from him with disgust. "Who are you? Who the fuck are you?"

More violence waits on her tongue. Does he respect anyone other than himself?

"You know me! You know who I am, where are you going?!" Doesn't she know she knows more about him than anyone else?

"I don't know shit about you!" She yells. "Where were you last night?"

"What?" All color is drained from his face. How could she know?

"Were you with them because I couldn't perform the way you wanted the other day?"

"What are you talking about?!" Feyd tries to grasp her by the arms once more but she twists away. If anything, he is at blame for being unable to make his woman comfortable enough to reach her release. What a pitiful good-for-nothing he is, pathetic down to the last, rotting cell. "I haven't touched my pets since I met you and that's the truth!"

"Oh, yeah? Then why was I not allowed to see you at night?"

"What makes you say that?"

"I tried to come to you last night, but the guard at my door said I'm supposed to stay in this room! So, were you with them?!"

Feyd stops his advance and an incredulous shimmer glazes over his blinking eyes. He could have held her last night, against his hurting heart. A dizzying lightness befalls his chest and sorrow becomes anger and anger wings his footsteps when he turns to the door, grinning, then giggling. Feyd slams his veined hand against the panel so hard, the screen cracks and inky blood slips down the valleys of his palm.

"Feyd? Feyd! What are you-"

The baffled guard faces the snickering na-Baron behind the opening door, last night's tiger resurrected like a Ghola for one last kill. A stammered 'my Lord' on diddering lips. Feyd-Rautha looks as bestial as his hyenas with prowling steps and rolling shoulders, searing eyes locked on his unmoving prey.

"You told my woman she couldn't see me last night? S'that right?" A slip of pink peeks out of the ghastly frame of black, gnashing teeth.

"My Lord, I beg your mercy, I didn't wish to distur-"

Metal flashes. The relic screams as the length of Feyd-Rautha's blade carves into the guard's pallid neck, Adam's apple bulging and sitting on the knife like a popped, black cherry. Blood sputters around Feyd's clenched fingers and laughter has faded from his lungs at once. He digs deeper as the guard draws in gurgling breaths, bubbles of air swimming in the blood around the metal.

The relic freezes like a mouse, glued to the spot as if she might turn invisible to the cold eyes of the beast who wears her lover's clothes. He looks nothing like Feyd-Rautha now, his features empty and alien with eyes that don't feel and hands unfazed by the death that stains them in thick, inky streams that roll down his victim's neck.

This is how the universe sees him.

Feyd's blade slashes sideways, spraying a half moon of blood across the corridor and when the guard stumbles, he falls back into the na-Baron's knife, adding a vertical gash to the horizontal one, tip sinking into the flesh under his jaws, and with a jerk - up into his tongue.

The man grunts, still clinging to his life by a thread, and lurches forwards without drawing his sword. His head falls on Feyd-Rautha's shoulder. Feet shuffle in a grotesque waltz and Feyd's bloody fingers slip around the taller man's neck, holding him there while his blade plunges into his belly between armor plates so deftly, he could find all the weak spots blindfolded. The body slackens, weighing down on Feyd-Rautha whose ichor dripping fingers aren't ready to let go.

Shuk! Shuk!

Is the sound of his blade sinking into soft flesh and viscera, whipping back out with a spray of blood and entrails.

The Bene Gesserit may have proclaimed her human, but the adrenaline that sets her nerves ablaze is a gift from her ancestors, animals, because that's what humans are at the end or the day when facing a bigger predator.

Fwump.

Feyd looks her way, the dead body dropped, and blood covers his hand like a shiny glove of ink, dripping down the blade tip in a drizzling stream. The light catches on the sharp edges of his alabaster skull and all she sees is a new, terrifying breed of human, birthed by a world of poison and decay. There are millennia between them. They may share the same DNA but that doesn't mean he is not an alien to her.

In the end, the man from her dreams is not the man of her dreams.

Out the door? - Blocked! Death!

Off the balcony?! - Death!

To the Sarcophagus then. To her gun.

She turns and sprints, feet skidding over the shards of her rose-colored glasses, but Feyd pounces, a beast hungry for carnage, and catches her around the waist, hurling her backwards with the strength of three men. His blade clatters to the ground.

"No, wait. No. NO! NO! You can't go," he howls. "You cannot leave me!"

Wailing, she thrashes in his grasp and slams her elbow into his guts, her foot against his shin, then his crotch and the soft flesh there is squashed by her heel. When his hold slackens, she twists away and bolts, bare toes slipping across icy marble, but blood-smeared fingers find her shoulder, tearing on the fabric. She throws herself away from him so hard, the seam starts coming apart, so his other hand flies to her throat, steel-hard fingers curling around clammy flesh, yanking her around and against the wall.

She can't be looking at him like that, like he's the devil. Like he looks at his uncle.

Desperately, his lips search for hers but she jerks her head to the side, bites, scratches, nails burrowing into his throat. No is the word that Feyd-Rautha raps out between violent kisses that seek her pulse point with his tongue and teeth, no, she can't ever leave him, no, not ever, even if she hates him like everyone else. Her fear poisons the sweat on her neck and her nails don't egg him on, they hurt. He takes a knee to the guts and his lungs pop open for a harrowed cry.

Pain used to be pleasure but everything hurts, she doesn't love him anymore. One more meek and quiet final 'no' as he abandons the assault on her neck and his slackened arms wrap around her middle, hiding his face from rejection in her shoulder's soft flesh. Tears drip hotly, finally. All day and all night he's been waiting for the cathartic downpour, but not even the most pitiful plea could rouse a sliver of empathy in the hollow of his chest. Now he bawls like a baby forgotten in its crib and his blood-soaked hands seek purchase at the back of her shirt.

The woman grows still, nails still wedged inside the bloody crescent indents in his neck. Her lungs ache when she draws a trembling breath and Feyd-Rautha's hard, heavy chest moves with her, no more fight left in him. Quietly, she cries with him and curls her arms around his round shoulders, holding him there as he clings to her like an abandoned child and sheds tears for all the hurt and all the fear.

The man of her dreams is still there, somewhere, under the alien shell, vulnerable, weeping.

"You hate me, don't you?" A broken sob.

Looking over his head, the dead guard's viscera glitters darkly on the hallway and she is surprised to realize that even now, she doesn't hate him.

Feyd continues: "This is why I never wanted you to know who I am. I am awful."

"You're not awful," she whispers, fingers slipping around the back of his head, nails rimmed darkly by Feyd's blood.

"I have to be awful. I was born to be awful."

"That's not true…" He was groomed to be awful.

But Feyd isn't finished. In a fashion of now or never, confessions spill out of him like poison rain. "I killed my mother when I was four. I don't remember why. I killed my pets. I kill men for sport. I kill people for fun. I kill because it's the only thing I can do. Yesterday, I-" His voice breaks. "I killed anyone I could find and no one fought back. I lo-o-ost count."

A full glass can't get any fuller when pouring more water, so shock and disgust are lost to the acceptance that has smoothed over the crescendo. They're just information to be added into a folder in her head. Feyd killed his mother. Feyd kills people for fun. Still, she holds him, fingers sliding up and down the back of his head as his shaky sobbing turns breathless and ugly.

"Okay," she whispers and rests her cheek on his head, exhaling softly so her warm breath fans his scalp. "For fun?"

"Ye-e-es."

"So, you had fun last night when you-" She swallows. "Killed?"

"No."

She lets out a thoughtful hum and Feyd's grip on the small of her back tightens. Still, he doesn't dare look at her and tears and snot have soaked her shirt. With her emotions currently defective, her ability for logic is still sharp, and so she concludes, it does all make sense.

Her poor Feyd, a current had pulled him under when he was barely a child and then layer after layer, he has been building his armor so as not to drown in the maelstrom of abuse. With every kill, a little boy has been screaming for help in an empty room.

Soft lips press a kiss to the crown of his head and Feyd's breath trembles in her hold, a beast tamed by a loving caress. That's all it takes.

Just because she understands his actions, doesn't mean she endorses them.

"Will you still be my wife?"

"I haven't decided yet." Another kiss so gentle, it taunts the corpses stacked up in the processing hall.

"So, we're no longer engaged?"

"I don't think we ever were, not to me. But that doesn't mean I don't love you."

Dizzily, Feyd-Rautha raises himself. If not for the fingers twisted into his woman's shirt, he might just topple back into the spinning vortex at whose edge he is teetering now, one foot in heartbreak, the other in salvation. Blue eyes crack open, rimmed with dark blood vessels. She doesn't flinch, doesn't bolt, only her hands slide to the front of his suit and slip under the lapels, thumb rubbing where his heart hammers.

Feyd sees the tracks of dried tears on her cheeks and the shadow of horror tucked away in the corners of her eyes in a way that is all too familiar to him. More than anything, he wants to delete the images from her head and close the door, kick the blade under the bed, pretend it never happened. He tried to do everything right, got her flowers, hid her away in her own room away from state matters, made love to her with all his heart, but at the end of the day he is still who he is when he can't hide within a dream and it'll never be enough.

"Feyd, is… Is Lilia okay?"

"Yes, she is," comes the earnest reply and she exhales shakily, head sinking against Feyd's chest, arms sliding around his waist beneath the suit where his skin is burning hot.

"Thank God." Her voice warbles, the only warning before her knees give out and every other muscle along with them. The pair sink to the cold, hard ground. "I just want to go home," she sobs and crawls in her beloved's lap which is still the only place in the cold, hard universe that soothes her soul.

Not her sarcophagus, although it is tempting to freeze herself up again and sleep forever. No, it is still him. A new home, not what she had imagined, but a home.

"Me too," Feyd sighs and squishes his cheek against the top of her head, closing his eyes to envision the bedroom of their shared dream, blue pillows, a white bed, a softly rustling fern in a terracotta pot, her in his arms. Home.

How easy it would be to demand of him: 'If you kill one more innocent, I will leave you!' But she might just kill more than she saves that way, and maybe him too, and maybe herself.

"Feyd, can you-" She sniffles. "If you get angry again, please never hurt Lilia. And whoever the new guard will be, don’t hurt him either. Can you do that for me please?"

"I promise." He squeezes her tight, eyes screwed up so tightly that he sees only dizzying stars. "I love you. I'm sorry."

She cannot fix the whole world, but she can start where she can see. It's not a solution, but a sapling, and a sapling can grow.

Mother Father How did I end up here, stone bound? All I feel ist the striking distance to the clouds My flesh is fettered on the skin of the soil But even so I almost reach the sparks in the void Sailing through the vacuum, am I drowned or alive?

- Cepheus by Fewjar

A/N: Okay, I promise promise this was the angstiest chapter, we're climbing uphill from here!! 🥺🥺🥺 Hand over your guesses, what do you think will happen from here? 😌💕 Thank you so much for all of your time!

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