#but God Damn it was an experience
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this is very important and everyone needs to know:
after nearly half a year and two accidental restarts:
i have finished homestuck
ā¢:3
#ā¢:)#homestuck#just a few days off of 413 unfortunately#but God Damn it was an experience#i enjoyed all of it. rest assured the brainrot is extreme and the hyperfixation will last much longer probably
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I was telling my dad about ao3 and he asked "But why would anyone do it if they're not being paid?" And that genuinely makes me so sad. The fact that the majority of people are told things are only worth doing if there is financial gain in it. Oh you're an artist? Artists don't make any money.
Sometimes the point isn't money. Sometimes it's just to create.
#like god damn have some joy#in my experience doing things for reasons other than money is far more rewarding or enjoyable#its literally been studied and proven that doing things for money and or superficial rewards takes the joy out of tasks#in people and other animals#anti capitalism#anti capitalist#ao3#fanfic#fanfiction#ofc doing art for money is 100% fine and okay#its just that isnt the only reason ever for everyone#loz posts
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two stupid losers end up on cover of vogue
#i finally finished this damn thing oh my god. ngl i enjoyed it less and less the more i rendered but it was a learning experience nonetheles#my art#art#gorillaz#gorillaz oc#angelica valentin#Ć”ngel#angel#2d gorillaz#my ocs#ocs#artists on tumblr#digital art#illustration#vogue mockup#fashion magazine#magazine mockup#magazine#vogue#oc x canon#i have no idea why the quality is shit but tbh idegaf anymore š cant figure it out and im tired. need this out ā¼ļø
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Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending
#I like to believe that there is a universe where they get to grow old together#just one#look once upon a time I read a fic that had me bawling my fuckin eyes out where they get to grow old together#I do want to say that I believe in personal growth and I think that Curt can 100% have a happy ending without Owen- where he can grow#away from that experience and where he can healthily cope with the trauma he ended up with#where he can find solace in something other than alcohol and where he can find it in himself to forge new relationships and build his#connections with people like Tatiana#etc etc#I just want to make it known that this is one of many happy endings that could happen#(amongst the several sad ones that I know also exist)#ALSO I wanted to draw the old men and I do what I want#but yeah something something if the universe is infinite /ref#maybe this is a universe where the banana incident never happened and they were able to retire together#ough#the curtwen feels are really getting me today#I adore them#also I used a new brush ive been having fun with this past week#doesnāt it look cool?#I really like drawing with it and I like how it looks so#we might be seeing more of this one in the future#although 6b is still my guy#damn yāknow hypothetically- if Owen (depending on the au) and Curt lived to be in their 60s (at least) they would witness the first Pride#god can you imagine that?#At the very least Curt being around for stonewall and everything that came after that with queer rights#FUCK anyways#fun fact: a group of frogs is called an army#isnāt that cute#reminds me of that one person on TikTok that raised like a thousand frogs- they had a literal army of frogs#crazy#curtwen week
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Something something youāre talking to a friend who says something cringe/embarrassing/etc and say āKate Laswell herself couldnāt waterboard that information out of meā and lo and behold who is behind you but none other than the woman the myth the legend herself
#au shes not married yet because youāre the girl#she then drowns you in that pussy AYO#*ba dum tiss*#kate laswell#kate laswell x reader#one of these days Ill finish one of my 12 projects and post something thatās not a fever induced thought experiment#i think im ovulating#ive been losing my god damn mind this week
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I blocked them because they called me a bitch and their blog looked like it sucked, but finally..! AT LAST... someone on god's favorite website has called me "a pronoun person". What a magical insult. Yes, I am. I am a Pronoun Person. Behold!! My pronouns. I display them for all to see and admire.
#it's the stupidest insult#also this is either god's favorite website or the website furthest from god#depending on your experience at any given time#and yes this person was commenting on that god damn mister beast post#catie talks
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I'm sorry I let down my guard.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#xue yang#xiao xingchen#God DAMN this scene was brutal. Season 2 episode 2 is almost nothing but misery and anguish#Helena by Nickle Creek does not quite fit the comic's vibe but it is absolutely a Xue Yang song so I linked it.#The change from āHelena don't walk away...(gentle)ā to āHELENA. DON'T WALK AWAY (threat)ā is fantastic.#And āDon't waste your pretty sympathy - I'll always be just fineā. Xue Yang core.#Okay now for the real meat. Disclaimer first: *I really like XY.* I think he's a great character. I think his actions consistently-#come from a place of deep trauma. While his reactions and actions put him in a villainous role he is still human about his hurt#and what I'm about to say is NOT intended to be a statement of causality or villianize a group of misunderstood people.#So with that said...Man oh man does Xue Yang have a lot of BPD traits. More that just 'character who is chronically manipulative'.#The impulsivity and emotional reactions and seeking stability makes him feel like he needs that control. What other choice is there?#The part that really gets me is how he *wants* to be safe and happy. But his past experiences tell him how thats impossible#He's the kind of person who goes 'if you don't like me then you better hate me for something substantial". All (pos) or All (neg)#''Love me entirely or Hate me. But don't you dare leave me or forget about me.''#Not at all comfortable saying 'BPD coded'. Im not a psychiatrist. Just that he has TRAITS. Feel free to disagree or add your thoughts.#ppl with bpd also are not a monolith and everyone has very different experiences. Xue yang is very complex. People more so.
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I'm fully convinced that Feen wasn't a precious angel and was a massive brat in his own way. If he didn't get his favorite part in a play or if his artwork would get lambasted by a teacher he'd throw the most diva fit and insist how unfair the world is. He also most likely thought his peers were less talented than him and would freely butt in to critique their work only to cry foul if the same would be done to him. He was born petty.
On the right is an imagined scenario of him and Miles being study buddies. Everyone would have such a miserable time together <3.
#ace attorney#ace attorney fanart#fanart#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#feenie#bratworth#narumitsu#wrightworth#bratfeen#I both love and hate that these clowns have so many different tags#the studying is from fucking experience#there were times in college when i god damn ugly cried from sheer frustration
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hi! while i do not consider myself a āp.roshipperā as i dislike the term, i am very much a believer of anti censorship, āship and let shipā and letting people do whatever tf they want because it does not concern me and fiction is fiction. if i see content i dislike, i block and move on. i suggest you do the same. act like an adult, mind your business, and donāt be weird.
that being said, if you donāt like this, pls unfollow or block me bc those against this sentiment are not ones i want around me.
#iāve been seeing āthis person is a pro.shipper!ā and āblock these tags so they canāt find you!ā nonsense and like#oh my god grow up#mind your damn business#curate your experience but leave other people alone#hope that helps š#my words
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#i love this god damn website#people are sooo normal abt trans women talking abt their experiences here#fucking hilarious that the first post is literally implying that most of this ādiscourseā is coming#from transfems commenting on ātrans men just talking about their oppressionā MY DUDE YOURE AT THE TOP OF THE TRANSMISOGYNY TAG
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lestat de lioncourt - on the deer which runs faster than itself. HĆ©lĆØne Cixous, Stigmata / Anne Rice, The Vampire Lestat / Interview with a Vampire (2022) / Catherine Malabou, Ontology of the Accident / Czeslaw Milosz, New and Collected Poems: 1931-2001 / Louis Moe, Allegory / Ovid, Metamorphoses / Ethel Cain, Ptolomea / The Company of Wolves (1984) / Lingua Ignota, I WHO BEND THE TALL GRASSES / Hugh Parry, Ovid's Metamorphoses: Violence in a Pastoral Landscape.
#lestat de lioncourt#lestat#interview with the vampire#fascinating how thematically and psychologically intertwined these two traumatic events (wolves / magnus) are for lestatā¦#when nicki jokingly asks if lestat became a werewolf after his first near-death experience. like Ok.#thereās ofc this through-line of pushing beyond the limits of form when flight is no longer an optionāi.e. transforming.#for characters in myth this is often salvation. their gods aiding them in their time of need#but for lestat there would be no divine intervention.#(unless you count magnus as this force. which. is another topic entirely)#the transformation isnāt the escape; itās what heās trying to escape from#āknowing the only release was the birth or my own deathā ā> āonly death or radical transformation offers any releaseā ā> āthe emptiness of#death and still i said No.ā and even then thatās not The End. the Wolf is deadāonly you still have to walk all those miles in the snow.#also the stomach-dropping line of āBut it was happening again.ā so fucking sickening. the admission. the futility of the effort.#as well as gabrielle expressing the Horrific pain of birthing her first child. knowing she had Eight.#itās about surviving beyond enduring beyond living beyond dying!! even if that endurance is the very thing that damns you#cw rape#cw sa#cw animal death#tvl#the vampire lestat#iwtv#long post#web weaving
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I always think well if I dated a man, I wouldn't feel as insane. I wouldn't feel so awful or jealous. And then I remember why I came to the conclusion that I'm a lesbian. I just wouldn't care if it were a man. I just can't bring myself to care about men like that šš©š
#personal#I've definitely been like oh hes paying attention to another girl thats a shame :((( about it like damn you were supposed to pine for me#forever and ever#but its never like I'm going to kill someone over it. I don't feel sick about it. I don't feel bone crushing sorrow#šš#but I feel like maybe I experience comphet a tad? because I look at cute couples like jenna and julien#or jessi and ty and wish to have that. like i want what they have so bad but also that will never be me because im gay#i wish there was more lesbian and gay rep in media#god does not LIKE ME . he said here is. bad parents who hate you. here is bpd and other undiagnosed issues#and other undiagnosed issues that were probably half the reason you felt so isolated in your high school experience. thanks to bad parents#here is š©· COMPHET!!!!!!!!!!@@ you're actually GAY and those boys you were crazy for? yeah . they were cute and all but thats IT#NO emotional connection!!!! none at ALL!!!!! ššš you also don't feel sexually attracted to them either ā”#but what DO i feel for men?? just comphet? I feel something I think but its not love. its not a craving . its like#I want to be worshipped by a man and then tell him no š©· i want nothing to do with you but you should like me actually#??????????????????#does that make me a bad person? do I care if it does? I mean
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worst feeling is watching yourself start to have some of the major symptoms of your mental illness come back and not being able to do anything to stop it
#and dreading the worst ones making an appearance#cause god fucking damn it i was doing so well and then it all goes away like that#please tell me this isn't a unique experience because it feels like i've lost all progress even though this situation is#is completely out of my control#tldr it just fucking sucks and i'm angry#mental health#personal
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GOD OF WAR RAGNARĆK (2022) Dev. Santa Monica Studio
#anyway im like. not fine!!! this was a real experience for me#god of war#gowedit#god of war ragnarok#gow ragnarok#atreus god of war#kratos god of war#video game#videogameedit#gamingedit#dailygaming#godofwaredit#kratos x atreus#my damn heart#**
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#rvb restoration#red vs blue#red vs. blue#im not ready to experience this#im so god damn excited#i will weep violently
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I never thought I'd say this, but there's no way I'm one of the only ones here that isn't chronically online. Right? Right??
#PLEASE don't tell me this is genuinely how all of you view this#I'm not gonna make a longer post unless prompted but. there's no way so many of you are this chronically online. there's just no way#I mean this is the nicest way possible btw#some of y'all need to get some friends IRL. like genuinely.#if y'all are thinking that its evil to draw teens smoking weed or for there to be 2 year age gaps in high school relationships-#you do NOT know enough people. I'm being serious#don't get me wrong; some of the things being talked about are serious issues#(I am basically only referring to Louis when I say this. I hope you're doing okay man)#but the rest is stuff that is just so stupid I swear#I don't like engaging in drama hence why I'm not gonna tag the fandom or make this a big post outside of the tags#So much of this is the kind of thing you'd see in a 2018 DA ranters video and that is NOT a good thing#the combination of a lack of nuance + being teens with no life experience + hard opinions is soooooo ass#like this feels like the beginning of a clique who hates artistic expression#I saw one of the posts talking about how people in this fandom should basically be only wholesome or else you're evil and just. What??#Not how art works. not how liking a thing works. stop trying to police the people around you#when I say 'you' I am referring to the amorphous blob of people I'm targeting this rant at and not everyone btw#and I thought that me with my mental health testing approved black & white thinking pattern was bad. god damn#sorry for these tags being so long and ranty I just needed to yap about how I think a lot of this is stupid#if anyone following me doesn't want to follow me anymore due to this that's fine. idrc tbh#I could also like explain anything I mean in an actual post if anyone is confused by any of this#but otherwise this is my two cents#andy rambles
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