#but =w= dont gaslight the literal victim please
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
pixlokita · 1 year ago
Text
Fic: -and the literal dead character who can’t even eat or sleep or feel anything and is in eternal agony knew his friend had it worse than them, sure the friend was alive and depressed but being dead meant they weren’t suffering like their alive friend was who btw was also the reason they died slowly and painfully in the first place -
Dead character: -also feels guilty for blaming their friend for literally killing them even though they legit DIED because of them-
Me:
Me: no I’m sure the dead character has it worse.
113 notes · View notes
haunted-house-heart · 2 years ago
Text
living with someone with untreated mental illness is like. i understand why you're like this and i do empathize but also like. jesus fucking christ get some help before i throttle you i stg
#i hate my sis so much. like i get it. i really do. a lot of how she acts is due to mental illness and trauma but at the same time she also#just really shitty. like ik recovery is different for everyone and you move at your own pace but she just. isnt recovering at all it seems#like its been 6yrs since we got out and my mom and i have worked really hard on getting better and changing our behaviors#all the while shes just getting worse and worse to be around. like shes legitimatrly turning into my (abusive) father#its terrifying honestly but we cant do anything about it bc you cant talk to her#you say like ''hey this thing you did upset me can you please try to not do that again'' not angry or anything and she starts crying and#yelling bc youre triggering her and its not fair and nobody loves her and like. i get that some people cry a lot and thats fine! i get that#but its literally impossible to talk to her about anything bc she acts like shes the victim and youre fuckin evil for telling her to please#not put her dirty clothes on my shelf i dont like that please. like thats not an unreasonable request and im not being mean about it! but#im the bad guy for doing anything that critisises her.#and she treats my mom like shit. like i could deal w her being a bitch to me but to momma? fuck no.#i dont believe you owe your parents shit but my mom has been a fucking saint when life dealt her a hand that shouldve made her a devil#she did her absolute best and *she* was the one that sacrificed everything to get us out#and my sister treats her like shes an incapable selfish idiot.#and she never lets me talk. shell talk for an hour about smth she knows i dont care about but when i try to tell her like. hey my fav band#is putting out a new album or smth im real excited about. she gets on her phone and just ignores me.#and she KNOWS this triggers me badly its made me suicidal before and yknow what happened then? i had to apologize for making HER feel bad#she talks over both of us but it you start talking when she was THINKING about talking she has a fit#and she actively tries to gaslight my mom. like im dead fuckin serious my mom has to ask me if smth really happened bc my sis told her it#did/didnt and she has to get me to confirm the truth for her#and she treats her pets like crap she should not be allowed to have pets bc she just loses interest in them and stops taking care of them#and we have to pick up the slack#its literally just like being with my dad again. walking on eggshells all the time#my mom cant watch tv at night bc ellie gets pissed at her for ''waking her up''. even tho she claims she never sleeps.#i hate her so so much i want to punch her i want her to move out i want to never ever see her again#but rn we cant afford to live on our own. so we have to stay with her#anyway.#vent#tw abuse
3 notes · View notes
candyredmusings · 2 years ago
Text
“Another One Of Those ‘Things My Discord Said’ Sentence Starters.
Things taken from DMs and a few group chats from Discord. CW: NSFT Change / Edit as necessary !
i am literally tom cruise
cum is cool.
[NAME]  is fucked up cus he is straight man
[NAME]  show me your fuckin tits
[NAME], you better not be standing catatonic in your room wearing your handmade jigsaw robe again.
its like they creampied me but instead of cum it was new music
like what about my pussy-area makes u think sea cucumber
the mind is weak. but the body is funky
so im reading that fanfic where 1d like, buys your soul or whatever and im shook
well tom servo is a sex god
and then i freaked it
FUCK YOU APPLE JACK FUCK
ILL SLURP WITH YOU
LEMME SHOW U DICK
ITS A SIDE QUEST YOU SILLY BITCH
I’m a zombie the law can’t stop me
LEAVE YOUR GOLDEN UNCRUSTABLES OUT OF MY HOME I WILL NOT FALL VICTIM TO THY TRICKERY
you, telling me to ignore a twink with side swept brown hair? foolish.
Hes so hot i briefly started texting like a straight person
and because I’m god and I’ve decided that. No. In fact. I’m not done.
MY DUMB BOTTOM BRAIN FOLLOWS COMMANDS TOO WELL
[NAME], I know you love bloopy reggae jams. Now is not the time
OH THATS WHAT I THOUGHT YOUD SAY YOU STUPID ACCIDENTAL HIMBO DEMON
man i rlly am attracted to paul mccartney.
its not that kennedy was gay af sleeping w jackies fat ass out, he just has a better one-
jealous of my massive honkeers
YOU BRAINCELLED BITCH
this forced open my third eye and i saw the devil--
oh me seeming romantically interested in u is making u uncomfortable?? noted
the only pussy this party city shake out wig looking mother fucker is getting
[NAME]  expose your teeth right fucking now
IN THE DEPARTMENT OF OLD MAN FUCKING, WEVE GOT YOU BEAT
What if we kissed while one of us got called racist and we are both boys
i just jacked it to minecraft piss porn
I will pop a huge tentacle boner
i hate females fr fr
we left u to die to play minecraft
IM GONNA FRICKLE-FRACK YOUR WIFE
CAN I KARATE CHOP IT LIKE IN SPONGEBOB
DWIGHT FROM THE OFFICE IS NOT MY SKRUNKLY
she would never ever take away one of these stupid fucking hats
My brother in Christ you’re being haunted
i want to wring you like a wet towel and slap u against a wall
Yeah you'll come to learn I just have a thing for milk
Piss ur pants harder pls I wanna watch
I'm gonna corn on the kill myself
good morning to parappa and his stans. everyone else..... hi ig
lol look at this clown with no slurs
God has abandoned his children but unfortunately for you I pay child support and I will smite thee.
this is how I reveal myself to be homophobic
I have no sluts
idk what it is abt it but boba makes me become like an actual whore
im homophobic suddenly
he was like ‘You're so big”.... and i just started crying
anyones penis can be hard hes not special
for the love of god please help me
i can talk about piss for hours
im sorry i havent recognized mickey mouse clubhouse ost as the cultural landmark that it is
I ASKED IF WE WOULD RP AFTER FUCKING BIBLE STUDY OR WHATEVER
the benefits of being a yandere is that i dont have to forgive OR forget and I am a living breathing PVP zone so Fuck with me white boy.
When toxic by ashnikko comes on I enter the gaslight gatekeep phases of my girlbosshood
im like a child in line for the newest fucked up disney ride
[NAME] is just all fucking Sorts of fucked up
im clownfaking
why are we here? to suffer? every other day i get messages from a whore
always thinking abt when my friend called me a "white boy whore"
you gotta PUMP the errand girl with cocaine
im beyond shame bc i love all cock try again
people have fetishes.
They really do crucify anyone these days huh
u may have never hungered for cock but you have hungered for a sub sandwich and honestly? theyre basically the same thing-
hi im drawing hentai
[NAME] idk why but that really. makes me want to stab you
“Don't have sex FOMO, [NAME], no! “
“TRY AND NUKE THIS, BITCH.”
“There's a group of golden skeletons behind you hitting the griddy “
“GRANDPA’S ASHES SUCKED MY COCK AND TOOK ME TO ARBYS.”
“You’re lanky with no gender and silly goofy with the rizz it works.”
“You can’t just tell me I could be a Tumblr sexy man to my face at 4:30 PM.”
"I have strong opinions about the soviet union"
“CALL THAT PUSSY THE MATRIX CAUSE IM IN THIS BITCH AND I CANT GET OUT “
“dont cry. 8000 types of reptiles on the planet, okay?”
[NAME] lives his life like he’s an RPG character but picks only the rude dialogue options.”
“I need to beat off to this before God destroys California.”
"No amount of pussy could get me on a rollercoaster with three loops"
"I love your senior citizen pussy"
"Gerber is pretty reliable .. I mean .. The Gerber baby didn't die .... did it?"
“you are white i assume”
"I hate you terrorist, and you may quote me on that"
"I love watching you play minecraft. It's like watching a baby fawn."
"I've never seen old men who fuck harder."
"i don't need him to KILL i need him to FUCK ME"
"well maybe if you just dicked down your wife she wouldn't have gone on a murderous slut rampage"
"why cant these BIG titty bimbos stop HANGING around me"
73 notes · View notes
constellaj · 3 years ago
Note
Genuine question to your last humorous post (it got a chuckle out of me so thank you for that) would you say Danny ITA here? Or Sidney for that matter? I keep seeing mixed reviews on the both of them in the phandom per this episode and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it!
ok bet
i think danny is 14
heres the thing right is yeah blahblah abuse or whatever bad but a) middle school bullying is always comedically exaggerated for kids media, esp and DP and b) 14 year olds are just like that. like literally the capacity for empathy is not fully developed at that age. this is also recognized in-universe; Vlad goes iirc "of course you wouldnt understand, you're what, fourteen?" and danny says "hello misplaced aggression"-- so applying the "children are shitheads" logic isnt just something I can say from the armchair, but within the show itself. basically i think he gets a bit of a free pass on being an asshole because of the Circumstances that are about being a teenager
2. the argument that "fighting your bullies makes you as bad as them" IS a shit argument, but theres Context DP has
yeah yeah fight back against ur oppressors or w/e (please god remember dp is a show about a nerdy elmersona who thinks hes a better person than he is, and NOT a succint and valuable critique on class relations in contemporary america.) but like. buddy. he can walk thru walls disappear and fly. dudes bringing a gun to a fork fight. if we're reading into deep metaphorical language here then literally whatever danny is doing is 100000% worse than dash. dash does physical assault (bad). DANNY does physical assault (bad), reputational ruining (bad), mental assault/gaslighting (bad), and psychological trauma (very bad. we see in that same episode that getting possessed is absolutely horrifying and dannys just doing it for a Bit. a Joke. a Gag if you will). what I'm saying is if you want to approach this issue as a microcosm of a larger conceptual element, you cannot walk away from here saying danny is NTA. luckily for me i dont give a shit about this point like, at all, and in fact am mostly tired of hearing it
3. fuck sidney
maybe this is rewrite bleed (it is <3 I made him a redditor) but sidney is just so much of a nothing, stupid character it hurts. dude haunted the locker NEXT TO DASH for at least a school year and his first conclusion was that dash was some POOR VICTIM OF BULLYING? if we gloss over that then its just like. what does he do here. 1) terrifies children internationally with that possession sequence 2) traps danny in 50s hell 3) is the episodic antagonist 4) has an annoying voice 5) gets. redeemed? for some ungodly reason? sidney in this ep is a metaphor/stand-in for danny's recompense and Not Bullying, but he's. EVIL? but we're supposed to be chill with it? except when we're not. and SIDNEY bullying bullies is (goood? funny???) except when the narrative needs him to be the Good Person he totally drops that entire personality and is now bffs with dash? i do not understand what the fuck he means within the larger narrative, like at all. as such im just like. fuck this kid fuck this episode in its entirety and it makes me want to disagree with the episode premise just bc its poorly written
4. dash did nothing wrong
dash did nothing wrong. i have a brand to keep but for real tho like, the conceit of this episode is that bullying is normal within the world yeah? like its not GREAT but danny and sidney aren't demonized for it (the conflict is about like. learning to be liked as a person? OKAY fucking ripoff side tangent here but SIDNEY gets to be bffs with DASH and ALSO his 50s bully -- if Sidney is a character parallel to danny WHY DOESNT DANNY BEFRIEND DASH BY THE END OF THE EPISODE? GOD? IT MAKES NO SENSE) and dash's is just like. slightly annoying slapstick. dash's character is also built on super dumb hypermasculine traits like hazing, ie, a bonding experience (even though danny might not see it as such). instead of like. talking w dash. or using his powers to impress him. (you know. what sidney does. right here). danny just goes "die a thousand deaths" and slams his head into a locker. like. bro. Unproductive. PLUS when sidney DOES stop being a shithead to dash (again i will never understand why. hes a fucking trainwreck of a character), dash IMMEDIATELY does a 180? like hazing continues but after the football scene dash is genuinely impressed. bro if you just get on dash's playing field he will literally do nothing. according to this episode anyway
summary: this episode fucking sucks
basically i think this episode is horribly plotted + written and the overall message/theme gets very muddled very quickly because its more of a "what would happen, realistically??" story than a "this is a story with a message that the universe will bend to accommodate" and thats just like. NOT good for this kind of "is he an asshole" discussion. in a realistic setting id say yeah danny ITA because. bro. you could do LITERALLY anything else. but not in a condemnatory way. like if danny was telling this story at college and making fun of himself when he was 14 id be like omggg daniel you did NOT. shut up thats so funny.
anyway if im extrapolating whatever message this ep was trying to push, and debating it with the rest of danny phantom tumblr as if it were a cohesive plot worth arguing about, id say ESH. sam is supposed to be a "rebel" yet she hates beating up dash. sidney is supposed to fight for the "little guys" yet he doesnt fucking know dash is the bully. danny psychologically tortures people which i think is probably a war crime.
except dash tho. i have a brand to keep and that means that everything he did in this episode was fine actually. he was having a bad day <3 he beats the shit out of dweebs to cope <3
25 notes · View notes
surfalldaybaby · 4 years ago
Text
”A Very Long and Comprehensive Analysis of Feyre’s Experience w/ Trauma and Abuse
- This is not a kind analysis of Nesta but please still read it if you want. It’s not in the wrong tags tho so please don’t rant about how much you love Nesta. I love that for you. Personally, I hate her. :)
Also- I use many of the quotes that @feysandlover and @dont-rattle-aelin used to prove her point that Nesta is abusive because she pulled many of the really jarring ones. 
I was looking through the Rhysand tag and for some reason someone posted something comparing Nesta and Feyre in terms of their trauma, and they said that Nesta had experienced way more trauma than Feyre and I-
That’s disgusting.
First - don’t compare trauma
Second- they were wrong and lacked critical thinking skills that left out Feyre’s full experience with abuse
Nesta was sexually assaulted ( which nobody talks about enough) and her family’s fortune flipped making them poor overnight. Because of this she fostered anger towards her father. I get that. I sympathize with that. She is then taken away from her life and forcefully changed into fae. I cannot imagine what that felt like for her. It must have been devastating. Her whole identity was shifted in one day and she went from hating fae to being fae. Confusing and overwhelming. She then goes into war and develops PTSD and depression from her experiences. She sees her father die and is unable to reconcile her anger and his death. It’s horrible and I cannot even begin to understand the depth of her emotions here. I have zero issue saying that about Nesta because it’s true she has gone through extaordinary trauma and I cannot imagine how she fully feels. She deals with this trauma in unhealthy ways because they only exacerbate her feelings of worthlessness. Not her fault. However, she also treats Mor and Feyre and Rhys in disrespectful ways and Cassian and her have an unhealthy dynamic where they insult each other. Her and Amren have a shaky and partner like relationship but it is by no means a sturdy one. Az and Nesta don’t seem to have a relationship at all. She has no true healthy relationship with anyone but Elain, and you could argue even that is not truly healthy.
Much of Nesta’s trauma is due to extraneous factors and a multitude or variables. It’s valid and it matters just as much as Feyres. They are both real. However the amount of traumatic experiences she has gone through does not come close to rivaling that of Feyre’s and to even try and compare them is disgusting. Trauma should never be compared but I want to show Feyre’s experience in a broader light to show her development from a scared girl to high lady
Feyre was never an active abuser in any relationship she was always the one being abused. Nesta was abused and she was also the abuser. It is important to point that out because it heavily impacts Feyre’s story.
Also, I believe the reason Feyre became so accustomed and slipped so easily into being a victim to Tamlins abuse is because Feyre was already the victim of emotional abuse from her sisters. We see this everyday, research shows that victims of abuse go back to abusive relationship and form new relationships that center around abuse because they are used to it and find it comforting. This is an extraneous point that you can agree with or can argue against it’s just a personal connection I made. However, it is very evident how Nesta and Elains treatment of Feyre affects her. She has no self confidence, she remains illiterate and with no real knowledge of polite manners ( something important in the real world, something that holds her back from being able to assimilate into the real world), her spirit is broken down at home because she knows  that verbal attacks are going to come and Nesta is going to lash out and say horrible disgusting things to her if she asks her to do something or holds her accountable for her lack of work. She is constantly degraded for everything that she does and it has a pronoucned effect on her psyche throughout the trilogy and novella. 
Like Nesta, Feyre also had to go through her family losing their fortune, she also had to bear the weight of her promise to her mother, she had to support her sisters financially going into the forest alone to hunt animals just as big as herself at 14. She never had money for herself because her sisters took it from her. Like they literally took all her money to buy things they did not need, leaving Feyre with basically nothing.
“I’d love a new cloak,” Elain said at last with a sigh, at the same moment Nesta rose and declared: “I need a new pair of boots.””“I kept quiet, knowing better than to get in the middle of one of their arguments, but I glanced at Nesta’s still-shiny pair by the door. Beside hers, my too-small boots were falling apart at the seams, held together only by fraying laces... I drowned them out as they began quarreling over who would get the money the hide would fetch tomorrow…”
 And Nesta complains and whines and doesn’t stop gaslighting Feyre because of her lack of hard work. But, she doesn’t want to do work herself because she thinks it’s beneath her. 
“I thought you were going to chop wood today. Nesta picked at her long, neat nails. “I hate chopping wood. I always get splinters. She glanced up from beneath her dark lashes. Of all of us, Nesta looked the most like our mother—especially when she wanted something. “Besides, Feyre,” she said with a pout, “you’re so much better at it! It takes you half the time it takes me. Your hands are suited for it—they’re already so rough.” My jaw clenched. “Please,” I asked, calming my breathing, knowing an argument was the last thing I needed or wanted. “Please get up at dawn to chop that wood.” I unbuttoned the top of my tunic. “Or we’ll be eating a cold breakfast.” Her brows narrowed. “I will do no such thing!”
She doesn’t care about Feyre or the fact that starving is their new reality. Poverty is what they live in. We all know if Feyre didn’t go hunting Nesta would be furious at Feyre and belittle her and make her feel small and responsible for their hunger.
“Take those disgusting clothes off.” 
“Any bit of praise for anyone—me, Elain, other villagers—usually resulted in her dismissal.”
“Is there a problem, Feyre?” She flung my name like an insult, and my jaw ached from clenching it so hard.”
“You stink like a pig covered in its own filth. Can’t you at least try to pretend that you’re not an ignorant peasant?”c“Take those disgusting clothes off.” 
“What do you know?” Nesta breathed. “You’re just a half-wild beast with the nerve to bark orders at all hours of the day and night. Keep it up, and someday—someday, Feyre, you’ll have no one left to remember you, or to care that you ever existed.” She stormed off, Elain darting after her, cooing her sympathy. 
Then Tamlim comes and kidnaps her. More trauma. She falls in love with him, I think partly because of Stockholm Syndrome and also because he shows her a level of kindness that she was not given at home, and then he disappears so she has to go back to her life with her sisters. Her sisters have all the benefits of her being stolen away bcs Feyre was able to provide their old house and wealth back through Tamlin’s gift. Her sisters literally never did anything to provide for themselves or help their father or sister. If you really think about that situation as a whole it’s devastating. Then she goes to save Tamlin and finds that her home and her loved one was basically destroyed. She goes to save him.
While under the mountain Amarantha humiliates and tortures her for fun. She makes her run around trying to get away from a monster, her illiteracy is exploited for amusement while she is under pressure of death by fire, she is forced to kill fae in order to save her love, and she has to suffer with her injuries in a basement where everyone is rooting against her.
Then she fucking dies. And like Nesta she is forced to become fae in order to survive. Like she can’t catch a break. Her whole life has really just been horrible and so traumatic. A series of abuses.
That’s not even all! She goes home and is deeply depressed and struggling with PTSD and Tamlin, who she literally was tortured and died to save, takes advantage of her sexually because he is too scared to acknowledge that she is struggling. He uses her body for his pleasure while she throws up every night after he leaves her bedroom due to the nightmares she gets from saving hundreds of fae. She is also forced to fit into a box that she doesn’t want- wearing dresses, pretending to be happy, becoming a figurehead as Tamlins bride knowing that it means she will have to be submissive and have children. Lucien emotionally abused her and ignores her obvious depression because of his own fear of what Tamlin would say. He is a bystander. She is so broken that she stops caring about everything, even painting, the one thing she always loved. Then he traps her in his house which is traumatizing again because she was just trapped under the mountain! Even the people she loved, the people she trusted, continually can’t stop abusing her.
She finds happiness and stability later on after intensive work on herself, and months of building healthy relationships, but she is still troubled because of the guilt she feels from the townsfolks anger and their sense of righteousness for her actions even though she did the best she could in every circumstance. When she goes to try and save those townspeople it becomes clear that Nesta still hates her. She shows Feyre no kindness. The only reason she is allowed to use the house, the one that Feyre got for them, was because of Elain. Even after that Nesta insults her repeatedly for being fae. Those statments from the first book that I quoted higher up in this post are just a small part of how she speaks to Feyre in the following three books after she finds out that she is fae. Even after Feyre saves her and supports her she continues abusing and blaming Feyre. She continues to insult. degrade, shame, and humiliate her to uplift her own lack of self worth. Its a technique to stop her own insecurity and depression but it is in no way excusable. It’s no wonder Rhysand hates her. She abused his mate for years- something that he experienced under the mountain (shame, gaslighting, and humiliation). That is her life. She goes on to see her father murdered. She suffered so much in such a short amount of time is a wonder she wasn’t more broken.
Don’t come to me saying Nesta experienced more trauma to prove your point that Nesta is a good person and not responsible for her actions because she “feels to much” and is a woman that is cruel, and prideful, and unapologetic “bcs that’s who she is.” She has to be held accountable for her actions, her attitude, and her lack of words and apologies to everyone she wronged- especially her sister.
Feyre sacrifices her childhood, her body, her mental health, and her life in order to provide the stability that her sisters felt was their norm. They are inherently priviledged because of that sacrifice. They felt and still feel entitled to her money, and her loyalty, and that of her friends and mate. They survive because of Feyre. And Feyre never once called them out on their behavior, not even when they continually disrespected her after she provided them with a place to live and money to live off of. This was due to her feelings of guilt and the trauma that she had continually been victim to as a child and in Tamlins court.
Some of y’all use the excuse that they never asked Feyre to do any of that and I’m genuinely appalled that that is even a response to her genuine sacrifice. Her mother asked her to take care of them. Nobody was stepping up. Nesta was not going to go into the forest and neither was Elain, both for different but equally disappointing reasons. They both would have let the family starve. Also, Nesta and Elain were both older than her. Elain and Nesta as Feyre’s old sisters should have, and had a responsibility, to ensure that Feyre didn’t have to do what she did. Their apathy and ungrateful attitude is disgusting. Disgusting and unforgivable. Sure, Feyre may have been able to do it but she never should have had to. The three of them should have figured out a plan of equal work to give and take and survive. Y’all saying that Feyre never had to do that I- ... do you not have a family? Do you not have loved ones? You don’t have to do something to help your family, but you do it anyway because you love them and you hate to see them suffer. It’s just that usually you aren’t being exploited and taken advantage of at 14, for years on end, because the sentiment is usually reciprocated.
Perhaps if they had taken better care of their younger sister she would not have been in the woods and killed the fae. Perhaps all three of them would have bore the brunt of their fathers injury together and made a family. Perhaps if she hadn’t killed the fae in the forest when she was starving due to her sisters laziness, Elain and Nesta would never have been forced into being fae.
They neglected Feyre. They aren’t as responsible for her as their father ofc but they actively neglected her and Nesta even slut shamed her for her consensual sexual relationship with Isaac. The one thing she had that her sisters couldn’t take and Nesta called her filthy and disgusting for it.
“At least I don’t have to resort to rutting in the hay with Isaac Hale like an animal.” 
Nesta remains unapologetic and to me she is not a feminist character. Sarah J Mass tried to use her as that trope to fulfill her idea of a “powerful woman” icon but she’s just a cruel and traumatized woman who people let off the hook. She gets away with it because she gaslights other characters while taking no responsibility for herself. She was abused and traumatized herself but that’s never an excuse for her in turn abusing someone else.
Now I don’t mean to say that Nesta or Elain are irredeemable. Frankly I think they both have potential to be good characters if they just apologized to Feyre in the next book, and really put those sentiments into actions. I do think Nesta is a bad person right now, I think she’s an abuser. And I think it’s hard for abusers to change their pattern of abuse. Elain is less of an outright abuser and more complicit in the abuse. I don’t know if either of them can change, but they definitely won’t if people keep letting them off the hook for their disgusting behavior. I am not impressed or charmed by either of them. Until they show a hint of gratitude and remorse to their sister because as y’all can tell she went through hell to make sure they were taken care of. Not to say that they didn’t do anything for Feyre. They both  had important roles to play in the war, and they do have their moments of kindness and bravery and showed they cared for Feyre but abusers can be kind and considerate and brave one minute and then switch up just as fast. It’s about showing a consistent pattern of respect and love. 
Just because Feyre took care of Elain and Nesta their whole damn life does not mean she has to be responsible for them as high lady. Also she is not responsible for knowing how to deal with their trauma. Her own abuse, and lack of real world experience- because Nesta and Elain never taught her to read, and Nesta continually degraded and made cruel remarks to Feyre about her lack of manners “ disgusting pig, take off your clothes didn’t anyone teach you ...” (manners she didn’t develop because she was in the forest)- means she is not perfect at confronting Nestas PTSD or depression. Feyre’s intention was always good, whereas you can’t tell me that Nestas was good and pure. She is not exempt from being respectful and kind because she is hurt and has mental illnesses. She is not exempt from apologizing because she “feels to much.”
This applies to all of the IC as well. They are all healing. They all experienced trauma that rivals what Feyre went through. It’s no wonder they built a family from that shared bond. They are healing together- not healed. Nesta is not entitled to Feyre’s care or her friends kindness. She is not entitled to be added into the group painting or their secret jokes or parties because she continues to push them all away. Then she insults them and disrespects them. The inner circle has already suffered so much they are not exactly going to be open to accepting Nesta knowing her history and her current actions and remarks, and the history of the IC. Do y’all not remember Mors family nailing a stake into her body for losing her virginity? Or Cassian, Az, and Rhys being forced to bond together to survive, being called bastards, and being ganged up on by all their peers? Rhys being sexually abused for 50 years and seeing his parents murdered? Az being stuck in a basement so long he became the shadows and his hands being burned so badly they were hard to look at? Or Amren being in the wrong body for centuries and still she and all of the IC remain a family because they try to understand each other and their experiences. Nesta was not only rude to them she was cruel and spiteful, especially to their high lady, and they don’t need an excuse, but especially as victims of abuse, they are not perfect, and they sure as hell are not obligated to embrace Nesta into their family. The IC and Feyre deserve better.
A lot of people have posed the argument that if Nesta was male everyone would love her but I disagree. If an older brother let his sister go hunting alone in the woods for years while sitting on his ass, slut shamed her and called her dirty and disgusting, blamed her for her family’s poverty and spoke to her like she was trash for years and years, verbally and emotionally belittled her, felt entitled to her possessions and her kindness while they were both struggling to heal from abuse, predisposes his sister to accepting abuse as a form of relationship, and then rather than apologize “steels [her] back” and says nothing-not even an apology or a thank you for saving their life tenfold- he would never even have gotten a redemption story, or a mate, let alone a 700 page book. He would be the most hated character in the series but because it’s Nesta and she’s a woman and y’all pose her as this feminist it’s okay that shes abusive all throughout the series.
485 notes · View notes
b00bconnoisseur · 3 years ago
Text
Under the cut im just ranting abt my mom so you dont needa read or anything 🤷🏽
I am just so fed up w my mom and am so goddamn close to telling her bitch ass motherfuckin self off for how shit she is to everyone especially my lil sister who takes the absolute most shit from my mom cause shes so far gone wrapped into her mindgames that we can see that she doesnt. We see and know that shes a narcissistic abusive (emotionally, mentally, and even has been physically) gaslighting manipulative homophobic racist and annoying bitch ass motherfucker who calls herself a mother but aint shit. Shes so shitty so thats why she aint got any frens, over half her kids hate her, her husband dont like her, family members dont like her, her DAD dont even want her in his house and only lets us live there because his grandchildren (us) and has said multiple times that if it wasnt for us he wouldnt let her stay w him at all point blank, alotta strangers dont like her, even all the librarians i knew at the library didnt like her and she knows it, she also gets karma n wonders why she gets so much bad luck, etc. She aint got anyone and thats cause shes a cunt. Once we all leave her she'll have no one and will be alone and miserable and i cant wait to hear abt her breaking.
I just so bad want to just yell at her abt how shitty and manipulative and abusive she is and how bad of a mother she is and how i so bad want to leave her, like legit leave to across the country cause i wouldnt live in the same state as hee cause ik how crazy she is and she'd try n find me, and wanna cut her outta my life completely point blank
Like how does she expect me or anyone else to like her when she just uses people and gets mad when ppl dont do what she wants n doesnt get her way, yells n screams her lungs out abt EVERYTHING, etc. She feels so entitled and that shes such a victim at all times that literally when i finally CAME OUT AND ALSO SAID I HAD A GIRLFRIEND she had a full argument with me the next morning and when i was loudly balling my goddamn eyes out IN FRONT OF HER from how mean n shit she was being to me she was like "why are YOU crying?" and played victim and said i was being rude n not considerate of how she would feel abt me telling her i was gay and said she would've just wished i waited another like 6 months till i was 18 to say anything. And she still continues to be homophobic
Anyway not the point but LIKE. Shes so trash n i cant stand her omfg
And she has serious shit wrong w her and bothers everyone w her mental shit. Like its not even "hey can i talk to you about this?" Like she constantly every second of the day talks about herself. She tells every single thought that goes thru her brain at every second ABOUT THE DUMBEST SHIT LIKE "i had a thought about what if i got possessed or you got possessed or i switched bodies with this person in the tv or you or you did or anyone or any" to my SIBLINGS and if they arent listening or dont respond or are like "um" she gets so angry and plays victim. She acts lik a full blown child i cant stress this enough. Shes so annoying and im just. And like she literally annoys everyone and makes everyone uncomfortable and irritated with how much she just keeps talking abt every fucking tiny dumb thought she has and i literally starting crying cause i couldnt take it anymore. Like she was and is heavily affecting my mental health n i told her that and she was just like "um you hurt my feelings, youre so mean" and shes SO MUCH WORSE NOW. I literally cant take it. If she was someone else id block them or cut them out of my life for how toxic and shit she is. Theres a difference between talking abt your mental shit and then forcing everything youre feeling onto everyone and getting mad when theyre tired of hearing it. Like i definitely have mental issues of my own but i dont go to my gf or frens every second and tell all my shit cause who tf does that and also theyre gonna be annoyed to hell w me and be like "bitch please stop we're tired"
Anyway i hate my mom
2 notes · View notes
lizparkcr · 7 years ago
Text
small vent abt antis or whatever, please feel free to ignore
yknow what one of the things that pisses me off the absolute most abt the whole “you can’t ship/say/do this unless you’re a victim and are using it as a coping mechanism” is that  people are pressured into revealing personal and painful stories of victimhood in order to try and defend themselves and “justify” what they’re doing (to people who literally have the power to not interact w them) and then antis or whoever don’t even believe them and call them liars 
shit like “you wouldn’t do this if you were really abused/affected etc” “you would understand how we feel if you are/were an actual victim” and like what the fuck??? w hat the fukc????
i dont understand how ppl can be so fucking vile and hypocritical and use such backwards fucking logic??
“we are pro safe coping” fuck off man honestly you’re not pro safe anything like what are you actually doing to help kids in fandom stay safe?? creating block lists and encouraging harassment (bc no matter how much you say “dont harass these ppl just block them” you are creating targets for harassment regardless) and forcing -- quite often victims and vulnerable -- people into the spotlight of discourse when they’d been minding their own goddamn business, and gaslighting?? great job well done fuck off
0 notes