BEING NEIL FAK’S
GIRLFRIEND
HEADCANONS
pairing: neil fak x blackfem!reader
fandom: the bear (2022—)
i feel like no one really writes for fak and i love him as a character, so why not?
summary: neil fak has a girlfriend, but the guys think he’s bullshitting until she shows up for the opening night of the bear.
contains: lots of words, fluff, richie being richie, cursing, two people who love each other, hating ass motherfuckers, insecurity, fear of rejection.
• it was 2 weeks before the bear’s grand opening.
• neil, carmen, richie, and marcus were all having a smoke break outside in the back just kicking it.
• the guys were talking about various topics until carmy started asking for relationship advice.
• of course richie and marcus are putting in their two cents until they hear….
• “to be honest my girlfriend and i wouldn’t even have to go through that shit. we’d just talk it out and stuff our face afterwards! you and claire bear should do the same.”
• there was a deafening silence from the other men because that came from…fak. neil fak!
• what the guys didn’t know was that neil fak has been in an relationship with you for almost 2 months now. he’s been keeping it under wraps because he knew the guys would shit on him for it, but he had to come clean eventually. you always raved about him to your friends because you’re proud of the adorable, loyal, hilarious neil fak, so why shouldn’t he show the same energy?
• he was still a bit in denial that a woman is actually…attracted to him.
• marcus is like “whoa whoa whoa. hold the fuck up. fak…you got a girl?” he genuinely questioned. now, he was curious!
• carmen was confused as well, but he shrugged it off tbh. as long as fak was happy with someone he genuinely connected with.
• richie doesn’t hesitate to think it’s straight up bullshit. fak can’t talk to a woman without crashing out or making a bumbling fool out of himself. let alone being in a relationship!
• ouch! harsh, richie. fak inwardly cringed because he genuinely thought the same thing he never really felt like he was good enough for that type of thing, but that sinking feeling disappeared at the thought of you when marcus asked how’d you guys met and got together.
• neil could recount that day a million times if he had to.
• you were living it up in your new apartment until your damn refrigerator broke. you didn’t want to go through the hassle of ordering a whole new one, so before doing that you decided to have someone to fix it.
• the only person you ever make an interaction with is your best friend, sydney adamu. you’ve been hyping her up as she goes through the trials and tribulations of rebranding the former restaurant known as “the original beef” to a new type of place.
• you called her up and explained your dilemma.
• “hey, syd. i got a stupid question.”
• “there are no stupid questions, (n/n).”
• you both chuckle at your inside joke, before informing her about the broken refrigerator and asking if she knew anyone who could fix it without charging an arm and a leg.
• “i might know a guy…he’s a bit of a character, but he’s got a heart of fucking gold and he mainly gets the job done. his name is neil fak, but we just call him fak at the restaurant. i’ll see if i can get him to come by tomorrow to look at it. if not, i’ll beat the shit out of him by denying my best friend’s broken fridge.”
• syd’s dry and chaotic humor never fails to make light of the shittiest situation. you quickly agreed because there’s no way you’re gonna let your food rot.
• the next morning, syd sent you a text that fak has accepted the job. you silently cheered and replied by sending her a time and your address to pass on the message.
• fak had been approached by sydney for a side job in the city. he accepted without any question because he could use the extra cash! he told sydney he could go over to your place asap once he knows the time and place. sydney did just that before he gathered all of the necessary equipment before making his way towards your home.
• he went up the stoop and pressed on the doorbell and waited about 10 seconds before he was beheld a vision. a vision with the most alluring, brown eyes and deep bronze toned skin. your natural hair was in the style you desired to be and it looked amazing! not to mention your inviting smile and melodious voice when you introduced yourself.
• “hey! you must be neil fak, right? i’m f/n l/n, i’m a friend of sydney’s.”
• you held out your hand for him to shake. to say that neil was nervous was an understatement. he stammered a bit before getting himself together, giving you an introduction of himself and shaking your hand. something occurred as you two touched hands. fuck, fuck, fuck! he thought as that touch alone made him feel— warm, tingly, safe? but what had him stressed was that his hands tend to get sweaty as shit when he’s nervous.
• “a-ah, y-yeah! i’m neil fak. just call me fak! um, so, uh, you have a broken fridge. let me say this if my fridge ever broke down like that, i personally think that i would fucking explode.”
• you stood there in silence for a millisecond before you burst out in laughter. fak took the words out of her mouth. she couldn’t deny that it was such a huge inconvenience especially to her love of snacks. “i know that’s right! you’re real for that. sydney has told me some good things about you, neil-er, fak. my bad! but seriously— i believe her when she said you’re a trip, but good people. you’re hilarious! ah, damn, i’m rambling. please come inside.” you stepped back to let him in and lead him to the issue in the kitchen.
• you couldn’t help, but catch a pleasant vibe from the mustached man that was rumbling through the inside and back of your refrigerator. as he was working, you guys just conversed as if you two weren’t strangers. you just clicked instantly!
• to some, fak may have looked like a sleaze with his loud voice, numerous tattoos, interesting fashion choices, short stature, and his bushy stache, but his qualities as a person overshadowed all of those things. deep down he’s caring, sensitive, outgoing, and sometimes he has his moments, but who doesn’t? he also wasn’t making any type of insensitive remarks or jokes (ifykwim).
• once he successfully fixed the fridge, you were so hyped that you gave that man a hug and an enthusiastic handshake thanking him for his help. you asked how much he charged and what payment method worked for him.
• he didn’t want to charge you that much or at all because your constant laughter at his stand up material was filling his heart more than his pocket. he really wanted your number, but he didn’t just want to ask for that without looking stupid, so he suggested apple pay and gave you a discount! smooth move, fak.
•you put your number in his phone, sent him the payment, and let him know that you were saving it because you would like to see him again more often whether it’d be for his services or not, so in a way you urged him to keep yours saved in his phone also.
• fak was crashing out on the inside. did you just say that you want to see him? more often? whether he’s fixing something or not?
•he kept his cool, gathered his equipment, and went on home. from that moment fak felt he found someone and someone found him. not just fixing things or cracking jokes, but for genuine company.
• from that day on, you fak have been texting each other non-stop. checking in, sending memes, having deep conversations about the most insane topics, and laughing out loud late at night on the phone. sometimes he would come over to play a card game, watch a movie, or just kick it with some good food. you’ve never realized how much in common you and fak share. it was just the chemistry that drawn you too closer.
• ya’ll have been talking for about 3 weeks now and you can’t help but to admit that you care for neil…so much! you two are totally different people and to some, you’re built like you’re out of fak’s league. well, fuck whoever says that! looks doesn’t define who you want to spend your time with. everyone’s got their beauty. you could give 2 fucks if people talked about your connection with neil. you were just wondering if he felt the same.
• you invited him to your place to watch a jim carrey double feature of the mask and ace ventura: pet detective. you and fak have always agreed that jim carrey is a comedic genius.
• as you both sit on your couch and watch the credits roll, fak announces that he’ll leave, so that you can get some rest. you can’t sleep knowing you got these feelings and there’s this opportunity right in front of you. you hold on to his hand before he could take another step out of the door. your eyes not pulling from his. he raises his eyebrows as his pupils glint with expectancy, yet worry. he asks you if everything is okay and you swallow before you make your declaration.
• “fak…i need to ask you something. what do you think of me? do you think of me as just a friend? someone to kick it with? or someone to listen to your jokes, fears, hopes, and insecurities? am i someone you that would be proud of the way i’m proud of you? do you see more than just what’s on the outside?” you squeezed his hand.
• you paused to take a breath before you finish.
• “i don’t care what people say about our connection. i need to know because i can’t fucking take it anymore. neil fak, do you care about me the way i care about you?”
• neil was frozen. he absorbed every single syllable that came out of mouth. he has always had those same exact thoughts whether he’s helping to fix an appliance or you two are out trying a new restaurant that one of you recommended. fak thought he was too much of a chickenshit to even cross that line with you. he wanted so badly to express that you mean everything to him. you’re a fucking goddess to him and he’s just…fak. he can’t help, but get a little envious when richie, nat, and carmen had their respective partners while he was although happy for his friends, he was the 7th wheel.
•he’s calmer. he tries to see things with more of an open mind. hell, because of you he’s got a skincare routine! he feels ♾️ % with you if that makes sense. you don’t try to change him because you don’t need nor want to. you just want neil. that loveable person who doesn’t judge you. not just fak the comedian or the handyman.
• f/n…you’re so, so much more than that and i’m so fucking sorry that i didn’t say any of this sooner because i’ve been feeling like this ever since i’ve fixed that refrigerator. i want you to be happy and i want you to laugh a lot. i’ve never really been into this kind of thing before, so i don’t know what exactly i’ll be able to do for you, but i’ll always be by your side…if-if you want me to—mmph!”
•that was all you needed to hear before you pulled him for a kiss. it took him a moment to melt into it, so you started it off gentle and sweet as you wanted to take this relationship one step at a time, so you and neil would always ride the same wave together.
• after fak finishes retelling his friends how you guys came to be. they started bombarding him with all sorts of questions.
• “is she hot?” “what’s her name again?” “what does she do for a living?” “ have you guys fucked?” “do you have a pic of her?”
• fak was overwhelmed trying to answer each question except that fourth one which earned richie a whack to the head by carmen for asking some personal shit like that. “have some fucking class, will you?”
• fak refused to show any pictures you two share together. it was definitely not because he thought you were unattractive. fuck, no! you’re the most gorgeous woman he’s ever had the pleasure of breathing the same air with. like he thought before, the guys (especially richie) would think he’s got the pictures of the internet or some shit. he had a way better idea than that: he was going to invite you to opening night to watch him work and make these fuckers eat their words. he told them to watch for the girl in the red dress and the name for the table is f/n.
• 2 weeks til open has passed and the bear is now ready to welcome the community with open arms.
•everyone was shitting bricks, but they’ve worked their asses off for this vision and they can’t pussy out now.
• fak had tingles from head to toe.
• you and him usually had casual outings, so it would be the first time you saw him in his brown suit and you in that red dress you ordered from fashion nova for this event. it looked good on the model of the pic you sent, but fak’s round face flushed with red envisioning the clothing on you.
• the doors flipped open and the patrons for the first night of many are greeted by fak or richie then escorted to their tables as their meals are being meticulously prepared.
• richie’s eyes are perusing around the place before they stop on a feminine silhouette and— holy fucking shit. who is she?
• the red satin accentuated her body. highlighting every bump and curve. the dress had spaghetti straps and was low-cut, exposing the shimmering, melanated skin of her arms and chest. her hair was curled and styled to perfection as the amber hue in her pupils are made noticeable by the violet eyeshadow that was applied on the lid as well as her full lips were painted like a red candied apple.
• goddamn, she was like a fucking…real life jessica rabbit, but hotter. if it wasn’t for whoever the lucky bastard is with her, eva would’ve had a new stepmom a-fucking-sap!
• his trance is broken from a female voice. “excuse me, i have a reservation under the name, f/n. my boyfriend works here actually. i think i see him right over there!”
• cue the record scratching. richie may forget alot of things, but he never forgot when fak told him and the guys about this mysterious girlfriend of his named…holy fuck!
• the girl in the red dress. f/n. it’s you! you’re the one who stole neil fak’s heart. richie was feeling like the biggest idiot in the universe as he saw fak catch your glimpse from across the room before excusing himself from a table and power walking in your direction to take you into a loving embrace before you plant ruby your lips on his mustached ones.
• you just couldn’t help yourself! you know he’s at work, but he looks so cute and professional in his brown suit and slicked back low ponytail. he’s also wearing that new cologne you randomly gifted him and now you really don’t want to leave his side. your man, your man, your man.
• neil took it upon himself to escort and seat you at your table. he enthusiastically explains tonight’s menu with such confidence and passion as you peer lovingly at him through your lashes with a palm under your chin.
• don’t you just love it when your partner’s in their element?
• fak excuses himself back to the kitchen to find richie already crashing out to carmy and marcus.
• “guys! it’s fak’s girlfriend. she’s fucking real…and hot as fuck! look out there at table 9, the broad in the red dress. that’s all fucking fak!”
• fak lets out an exclamation for richie to cool that shit down, but deep down he was eating it up as carmy and marcus peered out to see the hype at table 9 and what they saw had them gagged.
• marcus’ jaw dropped and his heart thumped at the sight of you. “oh…”
• carmy’s eyes looked upon you, his eyebrows raised as his cheeks fluttered with red, finishing marcus’ sentence, “shit.”
• he already felt bad considering the fact that he has a girlfriend. (not for long after tonight)
• neil grinned as the guys gave their envious, but sincere congratulations to him before they got too distracted to get back to work.
• neil fak was indeed blessed as he waved at the woman in red at table 9. his abdomen rumbled with butterflies as you waved back and blew a good luck kiss in his direction.
• yes, you were all fak, but fak was all you too.
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8, 14, 23
For either of the Miyajis. Or both ;)
Ohhh, love this one! Thank you so much for sending the numbers! Of course, I will do both of them! To visually separate the post I will use the orange heart for Kiyoshi 🧡 and the yellow heart for Yuuya 💛
8. What's something that the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?
Kiyoshi 🧡 :
Of course it has to be the fandom's need to exaggerate Kiyoshi's bad temper and tendencies to say some foul things. My man has a bad temper, yes, but the fandom is acting like he can't chill, like everything pisses him off all the time and that just makes him look like a terrible person. We've seen him relaxed when he was walking with Taisuke after the exams that day. We know he is actually pretty generous and kind, he literally gave his personal items to Shintaro because they were his lucky items. We heard how genuine and sweet he can be when he finds Shintaro and Kazunari fooling around with the piano (from the special CD). People act like he is just angry all the time and ignore his better sides and all of his other qualities, hobbies and personality traits. He is just a little moody and irritable, like all of us are sometimes. He is just a human, he experiences ups and he experiences downs, he has good and he has bad days. His foul language also has nothing to do with his actions! Has he ever thrown a pineapple on someone's head? Has he ever buried, fried, ran someone over with Shinsuke's pick up truck? I don't think so. The worst he's done was smack the back of Shintaro's head to help him regain his composure. He's all bark, no bite and I will say that a million times if I have to!
Yuuya 💛 :
People usually ignore his existence, which I obviously don't like. When they don't, which is rare, they tend to do the same thing they do to his brother. They make him out to be nothing but an angry, violent man, which I might dislike even more! Just because his brother is a little moody and irritable doesn't mean that Yuuya is, too! We've seen him throw a basketball on Kazunari's head with the signature 'I will kick you' and people decided to base his personality off that one moment. There isn't much about him, but we do know a few interesting things that his personality could be based off. We know he has a picture of Tae-Chan on his phone (which is pretty cute and wholesome if you ask me), that he becomes the captain of the Shutoku Basketball Club (which is a pretty big achievement), that his eyes are same as his brothers, that he is a Taurus (a sign that's known for being very stubborn and hard-working but also very sweet, genuine, family-oriented and honest) and that he got angry when someone humiliated his big brother on National TV (I would be pissed, too). All of that, and people choose to take the one characteristic they already took for his brother and exaggerate it. I just really wish people didn't do that.
14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character?
Kiyoshi 🧡 :
I always thought Kiyoshi's hair looked really soft and fluffy and I would like to believe that it's something he would also love to achieve with his fashion. I think he would prefer style to comfort and that he would wear something rather classy as well. So, he would likely wear a vest and a shirt, some comfortable dress pants and dress shoes. When he's feeling cozy and comfortable he would wear a shirt underneath a stylish sweater with baggy jeans and with some comfortable sneakers, or dress shoes yet again. What would make him achieve the soft look would be pastel colors! So, imagine all of that in beige, baby blue, light orange, pink, lavender... He wouldn't add any unnecessary accessories, as he believes that keeping it simple is the best way to make a good outfit. He would not look for any attention with his fashion, and this is something that looks average enough, but still fashionable and stylish! I am not sure what that fashion aesthetic is called, but my Pinterest research says it's something like soft-boy and light academia!
Yuuya 💛 :
His hair suggests that he likes to look a little sharper and a little more dangerous than an average person. I can see him wear something rather punk and emo, something that would make him look a little unapproachable and a little scary. With that said, he would mostly wear darker and non-saturated colors, as well as rough textures like leather or denim! Considering we've seen him wear a skirt, I wouldn't be surprised if he was comfortable with wearing feminine clothes or even makeup. Jackets, vests, crop-tops, band t-shirts, baggy or tight, low-rise pants, skirts, shorts, baggy pants and ripped versions of all those items would make up 99% of his wardrobe. I can also see him adding lots of interesting accessories like rings, belts, chains, necklaces, earrings! He would absolutely kill the style if he had some extra ear or face piercings and wore something like a smeared black eyeliner! Not sure what this aesthetic is called yet again, but I hope you got the idea of what I meant!
23. Favorite picture of this character?
Picking only one is tough, so I will make categories yet again! Unfortunately, Yuuya doesn't have a lot of screenshots and almost no appearances in the Replace Plus novels, games, CDs and the movie... Still, I included everything I could find!
Kiyoshi 🧡 :
Anime screencap:
Manga panel (half of the page):
'See you next week!' card:
Replace Plus novel panel:
Cross Colors picture:
Yuuya 💛 :
Anime screenshot:
Manga panel:
BONUS Replace Plus novel panel:
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