#brie's ask box

[moon-ruled-rising]

I was tagged by @girlwithakiwi for the Self Rec Writer Tag.

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💕💗

(Please note: To protect my work from AI Scraping, my A03 fics are only visible to registered users. Thank you for your understanding.)

begged and borrowed time — If you're going to read a WIP of mine, I suggest this one! I'm really proud of it and it lives rent free in my head always. Submitted for Jonerys Summer Lovin' 2k22. Time Travel, Canon Divergence, Dragons, and Romance— it's everything you could ever want.

The Glass Dagger and the Winter Rose — My first submission to Jonerys Remix 2021. Whenever I'm feeling uninspired I go back and read this one. I love writing fairy tales (or things with a fairy tale tones) and to me, this is just splendid. Cinderella is also my favorite and I combined elements of the Disney live action remake (2015) and the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical. Cinderella AU, Ella!Jon, Prince(ss) Charming!Dany, and an unexpected happy ending. (Available on FFN)

this town's too small too keep secrets — The completed first installment of my High School AU Series. Originally, the whole series was meant to be a single one shot based off a country song but the muse to write a whole series of oneshots hit me like a truck and so I wrote this one as a sort of framing device for all the ones to follow. High School Jonerys, High School RobbxMargaery, lots of inter-personal drama from the parents, Friday Night Lights vibes.

A Christmas Coincidence — The first installment of a series dubbed The Brie-mark Channel. Submitted for Jonerys Winter Wonderland 2k22, this was my first time writing a oneshot like this and I just love the way it turned out. If you want holiday nostalgia, good vibes romance all wrapped into one, then I highly suggest this one.

sad beautiful tragic — Submitted for Jonerys Remix 2023. This one will be slow to update but the first act is up. This was my first time not doing a true 1:1 remix and instead choosing elements about the pairing (Anna/Vronsky (Anna Karenina) for this one) that were intriguing. This is definitely more serious than anything I have ever written before and I am living for the challenge. Adultry, implied age difference/maturity difference, Up-and-Coming Actor!Jon, Actress!Dany reclaiming her career and finding a perhaps misguided sense of self in the meantime. There's drama, angst, I believe it was also described as "a fresh take on Hollywood Noir" so do with that what you will. (Thanks @jellybeanficwriter for that comment, I think about it ALL. THE. TIME.)

As per usual, I'm opening this up to anyone who wants to share their fics! Boast, gloat, and share your lovely art with us!

[moon-ruled-rising]

I'm a little lacking in inspiration right now so maybe this will help! Go ahead and blow up that ask box, I'll answer them when I can!

Fanfic Ask Game (the movie, the sequel)

In celebration of me actually working on a fic, I made y’all an ask game instead of continuing to work on that fic. Pls enjoy.

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

😐 What embarrasses you most about your own writing?

👻 What is one WIP you think you may never pick back up?

👀 Do you have any WIPs that you would never let see the light of day? If yes, what are they about?

📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on?

✏️ Do you write every day?

🖊 Post a snippet from a current WIP.

🏅 What is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc).

😈 Is there anything you enjoy doing that you think your readers hate?

🌙  What time of day do you prefer to write? Why?

👖 Are you a planner, plantser, or pantser? Is it consistent?

📊 Current number of WIPs

👨‍👧‍👧 Do you tell people in real life that you write fic? 

🌝 Who is one character you haven’t yet written for that you would like to?

📝 What is one growth area you have for your writing?

📚 Do you read your own fic?

🌈 What inspired you to write [insert fic here]?

🤔 What is the hardest part of writing fic?

🧠 What’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet?

💻 Do you do research for your fics? What’s the deepest dive you’ve done?

✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing.

💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work?

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

👩‍🏭 If one of your fics was going to get you arrested, which one and why?

⏰ Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?

💋 [Freeform - what is something you want to know about one of poster’s fics?]

[stinkrascal]

human vlad is so fucking ugly wtf

[rowanhoney]

Man Americans weird me out so much

[doggobrie]

i am so broke rn but for the future, is there any way to commission you? i just rlly like your art style :)

Thank you Anon! I’m glad you like my art style, as for commissions I’ve never actually done any before? I work full time and do art as a hobby so I’m not even sure where to start in terms of payment methods/pricing etc. If I ever do commissions I’ll be sure to update y’all on here + twitter probably ^^;

I am open to suggestions tho! I tend to get art block a lot so if anyone has any spn or sdv stuff you wanna see yall can drop them in my ask box!

[heartfullofleeches]

Brie [🌽star Yan] and Roommate Stoner Reader have such a chill bond you can almost forget he's mad in love and wholly obssessed with them-

-

Stoner Reader: Your name is Brie and you have a mouth full of cheese graters- What are the odds-

Brie, playfully shoving them: Jerk- You did not just call my braces cheese graters.

Stoner Reader: Would you prefer I call them "dick shredders"?

Brie: Hey! I can suck dick just fine with these on- I could always give you a demonstration.

Stoner Reader: You'd do all that for little ol' me...

Brie, brushing his hair behind his ear: I'd do anything for you.... A-as your roommate and closest friend, obviously...

-

Brie, Holding a pizza box: Are you cheating on me :,(

Stoner Reader: Wha?... Nice, pizza's here-

Brie: After everything we've been through- You order cheap, greasy pizza instead of asking me to make one for you?

Stoner Reader: You make dinner for us every night plus I'm not in the proper condition to be anywhere near a stove right now, I was trying to give you a break.

Brie: Because that's what I'm supposed to do as your future boyfriend! Gimme your phone- I'm blocking all fast food places within twenty miles of us!

[novarex]

Allright, I'm doing DROW SMASH OR PASS, Legend of Drizzt and Waf of the Spider Queen characters. I've seen this back in the tags and I want to play.

Drizzt Do'Urden - PASS - idk, he's not really my type, and he's just a little bit boring. It would also feel wrong somehow, and I don't know how to explain it. I mean... I wouldn't say no if he asked, but Cattie-Brie would have to be dead and I'd probably ask if he's sure like 10x.

Jarlaxle Baenre - SITUATIONAL - Don't get me wrong, he's lovely, but his personality is too close to mine, and there isn't enough air in one room for the both of us. But get me drunk, and I'd do it for sure.

Gromph Baenre - SMASH - Slamming the smash button until it breaks. If you know me at all you know I'm in love with this pathetic wizard man. He is both brilliant and stupid, and just the right amount of sarcastic, arrogant, sad, and pathetic. I would marry him. He wouldn't get a moment of peace because I'd be trying to entice him into bed 24/7. It's like he was written specifically for me to fall in love with. When he went missing in WOTSQ, I would have turned the city to rubble and made the rivers run red with blood looking for him. I know Cattie-Brie was pissy about the suggestive fantasies he put in her head with psionics, but I would literally learn psionics just to play a game of horny thoughts tag all day.

Zaknafein Do'Urden - SITUATIONAL - a bit too self righteous for my taste, and I think I'd probably get on his nerves. But I'd never turn down that legendary dick if I had a few shots in me. He's got some anger issues I'd prefer to steer clear of.

Kimmuriel Oblodra - PASS - I just don't think he'd be into it. I would also be incredibly uncomfortable with him having that much access to my thoughts. Unless, of course, he's into the wild fantasies that my brain cooks up...and in that case... we might turn this into a smash.

Rai'gy Bondalek - PASS - Strong possibility that he'd just make me self conscious. He's certainly intriguing, but he'd hate me for sure.

Dinin Do'Urden - SMASH - Dinin, my love. I would scoop him up and take him to a cottage in the woods and make sure his belly is full and his balls are empty and have all of his babies. I would brutally torture and maim anyone who ever dared to hurt him. I would burn cities to ash and end bloodlines for him. Dinin deserves so much better. I'm desperate for more Dinin, especially after the events of Lolth’s Warrior.

Rizzen Do'Urden - SMASH - I'd keep him as a pet. What malice did to him is unforgivable.

Nalfein Do'Urden - SMASH - I don't even know why other than he's pathetic in thre way that I like.

Beniago Baenre - SMASH - He's adorable. I would insist on him in his natural drow form, however. I bet he's a good lover too. In One Eyed Jax, Jarlaxle teases him a bit because he's definitely into human women. He smart, personable, and he definitely knows how to please a woman.

Braelin Janquay - SMASH - He deserves everything. I find him irresistibly adorable. He's spent more of his life outside of Menzoberranzan than in and has a pretty strong disdain for Lolthian culture. He is smart and clever and Jarlaxle adores him. Braelin has also suffered a lot and remains so loyal to Jarlaxle. Everything about him is attractive to me. He has quickly rocketed to my 3rd favorite, with Gromph as my #1 and Dinin as a very close #2.

Valas Hune - SMASH - I feel like we might genuinely get along. He'd be good to go camping with somewhere far from everyone else. I really thrive with one on one interactions, especially someone who needs personal space too.

Ravel Xorlarrin - SMASH- I have amended this to smash. He has grown on me considerably. He's clever and not easily intimidated. I respect that.

Brack'thal Xorlarrin - SMASH - Ok, I know he's only in one book (Charon's Claw) but he checks all of the "he's pathetic and tragic in all the right ways" boxes. His whole story makes me want to swoop him up and carry him off. Charon's Claw starts off so strong with him being kicked around that I just immediately wanted to protect him. His whole story just has me in a grip. It's really a shame we only got one book of him.

Tiago Baenre - HARD PASS - Fuck no. No way. I mean maybe if it gave me the opportunity to cut his throat, then I would make that sacrifice. He's the only irredeemable fuck face I can't find anything to like about. I'd kick him in the nuts.

Dantrag Baenre - SMASH - He definitely knows how to fuck. He's big too, which would be extra fun. I also have a weakness for Baenre boys.

Berg'inyon Baenre - SMASH - He seems like he'd know what he's doing, and if he didn't, he'd learn real quick.

Pharaun Mizzrym - SMASH - Let me be clear... I would not trust him at all. But come on, you know that sex has to be amazing. He knows what he's doing, is so good that he's an arrogant shit about it, and you'll definitely have a lot of orgasms. You know your legs won't work for a week after. There's a reason he's such a pain in Gromp's ass and it's because he's a wildly competent shitass.

Ryld Argith - MAYBE - He's just so practical it hurts. He also just doesn't seem to care that much about anyone other than Pharaun.

Nimor Imphrazel - SMASH - Half drow half dragon rabble rouser? Absolutely sign me the fuck up.

Allright. I'm not sure if I've missed anyone.

Tagging @vspin, @grandma-kei, @drizztdohurtin, and anyone else who wants to play. Feel free just to do the ones you know or add to it. I know I just did dudes.

[spacechalk]

Gouda

“Muriel!” Aziraphale called, head buried in the refrigerator. “Did you eat the gouda?”

            Muriel popped up beside him. “What’s a gouda?” they asked excitedly, eyes roaming the interior of the refrigerator like they were about to witness a new and exotic form of life.

            “It’s cheese,” Aziraphale said. “It comes in a red rind. Like this?” He held up the shards of rind he had found glued to a shelf. Muriel nearly went cross-eyed looking at his fingers.

            “Oh! Yes!” They nodded with satisfaction. “I ate that.”

            Aziraphale sighed. “For future reference,” he said, turning away from the refrigerator with his arms laden, “you’re supposed to peel the rind off. You don’t eat it.”

            “Oh,” Muriel said, expression contemplative. “It did taste bad.”

            “Yes, it would,” Aziraphale said. He began stacking the brie and salami into the basket. Muriel watched with fascination.

            “Can I come on the picnic?” they asked eagerly.

            “Not this time,” Aziraphale said, tucking a jar of olives safely against the side. “We’ll bring you next time, okay?”

            Muriel blew hair out of their face. “Okay,” they said. “Will you tell me all about it when you get back?”

            “I’ll be sure to tell you the highlights,” he said dryly.

Muriel beamed. Leaning forward on the desk with their chin in their hands, they asked, “What are picnics for?”

            Despite himself, Aziraphale cast them a fond smile. “They’re for fun,” he said.

            Muriel kept watching him, eyes round and expectant.

            “We’re going to eat delicious things, take advantage of the spring weather, and enjoy each other’s company,” he said, waving Muriel aside so he could reach the napkins. “Does that help?”

            Muriel scrunched up their face. “And you can only do that outside?”

            Aziraphale smiled. “It’s good to have a change of scenery every now and then,” he said.

            The bell on the door jingled and Crowley’s voice came from the doorway. “Sorry I’m late,” he called. “I couldn’t decide on drinks.” He spotted Aziraphale and Muriel by the desk and started toward them.

            He had dressed for the occasion. A black sunhat with a blue band perched over the braid that trailed down between his shoulder blades. The short, twisted straps on his shirt dress revealed the freckles scattered across his shoulders. The tapered sides of the dress danced beside the knees that were revealed below the hem with each step. The usual silver scarf and necklace were in place. His boots still managed to be loud on the carpet of the shop floor.

            He stopped in front of them and held out the bottles in his arms. “I got a red and champagne,” he said. “All right?”

            Aziraphale ran his hand down the front of the waistcoat he was wearing, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious about it. “Yes,” he said. “Those look lovely, my dear.”

            “Good,” Crowley said, stowing them in the basket. “Ready to go then?”

            “Just a moment,” Aziraphale said. He retreated to a cabinet and retrieved two boxes of biscuits.

            “Great,” Crowley said, lifting the basket. “Shall we go? We’re burning daylight.”

            “Keep an eye on the shop, will you, Muriel,” Aziraphale called over his shoulder as he took Crowley’s hand and was led out of the shop.

            “Have fun!” Muriel called after them, flapping their hand like they were waving off a naval ship.

__

            Crowley sprawled on the blanket, not bothering to keep his legs together. Aziraphale sat beside him, slightly less buttoned-up than usual with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, leaning back on his hands. He closed his eyes, savoring the breeze.

            Many other people had had the same idea as them and the park was crowded, the grass teeming with children and dogs. One family settled their blanket too far inside the polite distance maintained by strangers and Aziraphale tried not to resent them. He could hear every word they were saying as the children tramped their muddy shoes all over the blanket, one mother searched frantically in the hamper for the juice boxes, and the other mother fought the dog for a ball. He felt a headache coming on.

            Suddenly the babbling of the family turned to shrieks.

            “Ow! Ow! Something’s biting me!”

            “What the hell – ”

            “It’s in my pants!”

            Aziraphale risked a glance over.

            The little family was in chaos as a seething mass rose up from under their blanket and spilled around them. Thousands, possibly millions, of ants emerged seemingly from the earth and swarmed the family. It seems they had set their blanket down directly on a nest.

            The family made a hasty exit, leaving the blanket behind entirely, apparently believing it to be a lost cause. Aziraphale cast his companion a look from under his eyebrows.

            “Crowley,” he said reproachfully.

            Crowley cackled.

            Aziraphale offered a quick prayer that the family’s bites would be soothed and healed. Turning back, he dared to allow himself a moment to admire his counterpart. 

            “That’s a very nice hat, dear,” he said.

            “I burn easily,” Crowley said defensively.

            Aziraphale hesitated, then boldly reached out to skim his fingers over the freckles already blossoming on Crowley’s shoulders. Crowley sucked in a sharp breath.

            “Aziraphale!”

            Aziraphale flinched and pulled back as though caught. Crowley groaned.

            “Aziraphale!” the voice came again.

            “No,” Aziraphale said crossly as Muriel skidded to a stop in front of them. Crowley sat up, waving his hands at Muriel like he was warding off a swarm of flies. “Piss off,” he growled.

            Muriel clasped their hands over their chest, eyes wide. “Please?” they begged. “I don’t know what to do!”

            Aziraphale sighed.

            “Aziraphale,” Crowley said warningly. Aziraphale didn’t heed him.

            “What happened?” he asked wearily.

            Muriel’s face brightened with relief. “Some people came into the shop and they said they wanted to give me books! That’s not how it works, is it?”

            Despite himself, Aziraphale perked up. “Oh? What kind of books did they have?”

            Muriel looked lost. “Ones…in a box?”

            Aziraphale waved a hand. “No matter. Tell them we’ll take them and put them in the back room. Make sure to write down their phone number so we can contact them about payment if we do end up putting any of them on the floor.”

            “If,” Crowley muttered moodily beside him. Aziraphale ignored him.

            “Okay!” Muriel said, immensely relieved. “I can do that!”

            “Yes you can my dear,” Aziraphale said encouragingly as Muriel beamed and took off across the green again.

            “They’re never going to learn if you keep digging them out,” Crowley complained. He waved a hand. “Sink or swim. That’s how you build confidence.”

            “Yes, but everything is so new to them!” Aziraphale said. “Some guidance while they get some experience under their belt will set them up for success later.”

            Crowley rolled his eyes and flopped back onto the blanket. Aziraphale looked down at him. He wiggled a little and then lay down beside him, their shoulders touching. If he tilted his head it would be like he was resting it on Crowley’s shoulder. He promptly did so.

            “How long can picnics last, do you think?” he asked hopefully.

            “Hmm,” Crowley said, faux-thoughtfully. He shifted so that they were pressed more firmly together. Aziraphale tried not to wiggle again. “I was once on picnic that lasted a whole week.”

            Aziraphale tilted his head so he could see his face. “Were you?” he asked fondly. “What happened?”

            “Well, you see, the Mount Auburn Cemetery had just opened and the crowds were bonkers…”

[scribble-dribble-writes]

Plastic Hearts - (17)

<<<Prev Next>>>

---

And so it begins

---

He pulled on the lace to make sure it was tied well but when he was done, you didn’t feel like getting up.

“Is that it? Should that open a portal?”, he rested his hands on his knees.

“I don’t know.”, you murmured tapping the skates together, hoping it was like Dorothy’s shoes.

But nothing happened.

It didn’t thrum with life, it didn’t shimmer, it didn’t do anything it did before.

“The instructions.”, you snapped your fingers to get up enthusiastically but the wheels caused you to stumble instead.

“Woah, woah, woah.”, he exclaimed as he stabilized you, holding onto your forearms. But you inhaled sharply when you tilted your head up, you were mere inches away from his face.

“Steady.”, he whispered as a slow grin spread across his face, his eyes lowering down to your lips.

You hadn’t anticipated for this to take off, for his presence in your life to fall into place so easily. You edged closer, his hands slipping down your arm, the space between you and him had become electric. His eyes spoke a language only you understood. Even silence held the syllables and whispers of his love that there was this new world that had opened itself up to you, where it was only you and him.

“Don’t you dare.”, he chuckled as your lips aligned beneath his.

“Why not?”, you pouted and his grip on your arm grew firm.

“Cause I won’t be able to keep my hands off you and we’ll be here the whole day.”, he pursed his lips, his eyes warning you of all the trouble he was willing to cause.

“Now, the instructions.”, he kissed your forehead as he directed you towards the box the skates were in but when you looked inside, the post-it notes were there but nothing was written on it. No trace of ink or impression of the words that had been there before.

“How convenient.”, you sighed holding up the blank piece of paper.

He rested his chin on his palm as he looked away, lost in thought. When the record player whirred back to life. Ken’s eyes snapped to it and so did yours.

The old radio on the other side began to wake up too. The lights turning on within it’s dial, the nobs rotating between all the available frequencies.

Your phones vibrated within your pockets and when you took it out, the screens were black but it was playing a melody.

So was the radio, even the record player. An eerie tune that was lodged deep in your mind causing the world to spin around you. The lights began to flicker, the room began to shake as though the realms were intersecting. He held you closer, his focus shifting between the shaking objects that surrounded you and the growing noise.

“What do we do now?”, he raised his voice so you could hear.

Familiar words began to appear in your mind’s eye.

A wish. Ask for a wish. What do you wish?

A wish for?

You closed your eyes shut as you began to concentrate. The answer was at the tip of your tongue.

“All it takes is a wish to come back.”, you uttered the words and it struck you.

The noise died down but you couldn’t feel the floor beneath you anymore.

“Uhh, Brie.”, Ken mumbled when you opened your eyes to see you were beginning to float, so was he and all the items in the room.

You blurt out a laugh at the insanity of all this, that this was the world you had come from, this was where you had belonged before, in all this chaos.

“Is this supposed to happen?”, he cocked his head to the side and his fingers intertwined with yours to keep him from moving away.

“Anything is possible now, Ken.”, you shrugged your shoulders.

“We’re in transit.”, you observed your surroundings, it began to shift between the real and the imaginary.

“Ok so that means, I need to wish us back.”, you tell him what was to be done next to which he nodded.

So you held his hands in yours and closed your eyes again, trying to not think about everything that was going on around you.

“I wish to go back.”, you said the words but you didn’t feel its meaning and weight as you said it.

The silence broke to have a distorted voice, the spirit of the tunnel, grumble in anger.

YOU WISH TO BE REAL

The voice thundered but it wasn’t wrong. You wanted to save Barbieland but you longed to come back here, where the risks were dangerous but the outcome was not decided by how children used you in their story. You could create your own story.

You opened your eyes to see that your apartment had faded, now a swirl of darkness was beginning to envelope you and all you felt in that moment was fear.

You didn’t know what to do next and it felt like time was running out. Ken caught your gaze knowing you were beginning to panic.

“How can I wish for something I don’t want?”, you asked and he took a second to respond.

“Then think of something you do want.”, he smiled.

But he didn’t stop there. He held the back of your neck as he slowly placed his forehead on yours such that his thoughts could be masked as yours for a brief second.

“Your bakery near the corner of the street that overlooked the beach. Our evening walks by the park. Our dream house where we can hide away so that the night never ends and I can dance with you to wipe away my blues.”, he began to narrate and you could see it like a movie in your head.

That even in Barbieland, with your job and Ken, it would become perfect. Suddenly it was something you could wish for but even before you could wish to be back, he spoke the words.

“We wish to be back.”, he whispered and the darkness covered you whole.

The world was pitch black and all you could feel was the steady sound of his heart as he wrapped his arms protectively around you.

“How did you do it?”, you asked as the dust storm raged around you.

“My wish in the tunnel was to be anywhere you are.”, he spoke into your ear.

When it clicked, he had disguised his true desire to live a life with you in the real world by replacing the elements with those found in Barbieland.

“You tricked the riddle.”, you laughed as your eyes lit up.

“Bingo.”, he said and laughed as he held your gaze with a mischievous look.

But your feet hit the ground and the darkness around you both fell away like sand. You felt your heart drop to your stomach but it was Ken’s gasp that made you place your hand over you mouth in disbelief.

The sky was dark orange, the sun almost blackened. The land had lost its pink zeal and Barbieland looked like it was dealing with the plague. The city was abandoned with cars and accessories resting on the road like the kids had forgotten them in the playground. The buildings were broken down while some had parts of it missing.

You turned to catch a glimpse of a familiar place, the walls were gone and so was most of its content inside it. Your bakery looked like it was where all this black goo had begun to ebb from.

Ken saw the damage around him and as grateful as he was to finally be back, guilt stung him too. Somewhere in between saving the world and falling in love with you, he had taken a little extra time in being selfish. To linger around you, to spend those few nights in your presence when he should have been here.

But he paused, as much as the guilt wanted him to feel bad about his decisions. He knew he didn’t regret any of it, cause if he did, then that would mean he regretted you. He turned to look at you.

How could he ever regret having known you?

You were his dream come true.

So he kept his head high. He still had time, the needle still had room between were it was and the end of the red zone on his watch. He caught sight of your skates, confused that it having entered Barbieland hadn’t caused it to revive itself.

You removed the skates when a wheel cracked under your weight. The pink gleam only began to vanish further. You looked up at Ken only to see that his gaze was already on you, he bit his lower lip when he saw the broken wheel. His eyes held a determination you had never seen before.

“We have to find Weird Barbie.”, he told you. You looked ahead at the long desolate road that awaited you.

---

Tags:

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[ladylooch]

I need a little bit of sub (ish) Nico. Like I can’t let him be in charge all the time. Gotta girl boss him a little bit

A/N: I am blaming the summer heat in my state as well for my thoughts tonight… hahahah I’m not sorry. Which is why I still need to find Jesus. Hahahaha. I’m a lil drunky. 

Word Count: 730

The summer heat is getting to you.

And so are the defined curves of Nico’s abdomen where he is flipping off the dock with his brother, Luca. You can’t help but stare, even as Nina tries to engage you in conversation. 

��Hey.” Nina nudges your leg with her foot.

“Hm?”

“I said do you need more wine?”

“Yeah, ah… I’ll get it.” You offer, jumping at the chance to grab Nico to help. You should be a good hostess. “Neeks, baby, can you come up with me and help bring the next round of snacks down?”

“Yeah!” He calls as he uses the ladder to leave the lake. 

You head up together. Nico is dripping along the way as he towels off as much as he can during your walk. He ditches the towel on the deck before entering the kitchen behind you.

“Baby, you need more sunscreen.” He murmurs, pressing his thumb into your shoulder where red blushes your skin. “Grab some from the bathroom and I’ll put it on you.” 

After grabbing the white wine from the fridge, you pause by the counter, watching him go into the pantry. You open the cork stuffed into the top, taking two big glugs of courage before following your boyfriend into the walk-in space. He is examining two different kinds of crackers putting one back on the shelf to read the other box. He has a thing about matching crackers with the right cheese. It must be a Swiss thing because Nina does it too.

“Are we having brie or manchego?” He asks, shoving his wet hair back from his forehead. The action has you sweating. You fly forward into the pantry, shutting the door and leaning your back against it. Nico slowly travels his gaze along your body, noticing the distinct points of your nipples against the swimsuit top. “Hi.”

“Hi.” You breathe, practically panting. “You‘re driving me crazy.” 

“I’m sorry?” He chuckles.

“I don’t think you are.” You tell him. “At least not sorry enough.” Nico’s thick eyebrows dance up his forehead in amusement. You walk towards him, wasting no time in pushing your hand into his board shorts. He thickens in your hand. The box of crackers falls to the panty floor. “Here’s the deal. I can’t wait. Not one more minute without you bending me over and fucking me so hard I can’t breathe.”

“Jesus, babe.” He moans as you slide your thumb over the slit of his head. “Oh my god.” You squeeze him tighter until his knees buckle.

“You’re going to take me from behind. We’re going to finish in two minutes. And we are going to walk back down to the lake without one single hair out of place.” 

“I wanna fuck you on the floor.” He whines slightly.

“No. Against the cabinet.” You slap his cheek lightly, then wiggle out of your bottoms.

You bend over in front of him, gripping the base of his dick to push through your folds roughly. Nico’s hands ghost along your hips as you push yourself back onto him.  “Oh.” You sigh in pleasure. “Ah.” You gnaw your bottom lip, bouncing back until your ass claps against this abdomen. Nico presses his butt against the opposite cabinet, then winds a hand around to your stomach to pull you flush with him. His hips angle up and down with your movements. 

“Tell me how pretty I am.” You insist, fingernails piercing at the taut skin of his abdomen.

“So fucking pretty.” His teeth are gritted. “Fuck, you’re so wet.” He moans, tightening his thighs to stay standing. You reach for your hip, lacing your fingers together as you feel your orgasm coil.

“Play with my clit.” You move his hand to between your folds, immediately inhaling sharply at his touch there. “Like that. Please.” You moan holding his wrist there, feeling the beads of his bracelets indent your palm. You grind against his hand as you buck against him. You grab his other hand, putting it over your mouth to catch your scream. He moans your name as he comes too, filling your heat with sticky ribbons.

Your afterglow assaults you. Making you lazy as you redress yourself then turn to tuck Nico back into his shorts. His stunned expression has you chuckling as you grab the box of crackers he dropped. You extend them to him. He takes them with an astonished laugh.

“What just happened?” He asks, lacing your fingers together after dropping the crackers again. He tugs you closer, shoving his other hand in your hair as he kisses you.

“It was my turn to call the shots.” 

“Can we expand more on that later?”

“Sure, if I feel like it.” You lick along the seam of his lips, then return to the kitchen to pour two fresh glasses of wine.

If Nico’s siblings knew what you were doing up there, they have no reaction to it when you both return to the dock. 

“You didn’t get sunscreen.” Nico murmurs, kissing your cheek as you settle back into your chair. 

“Sorry, I got distracted.” You both chuckle and share another kiss. Nico takes off at full speed, jumping into the lake with a large cannon ball to splash you with droplets of water. 

He’ll pay for that later. 

[liggy-not-potter]

intro

hello :3 i’m liggy, i go by she/her pronouns, i’m 14 (a minor, don’t be creepy), acespec and possibly arospec. if you follow me i will most likely refer to you as my child out of a mom friend habit.

hobbies

i’m a freaking nerd, so book and movie recs are welcome! i’m in a lot of fandoms, so i probably can’t list them all here. harry potter, both canon era and marauders (fuck jkr) and the fanfic i’m writing where harry has a sister no one knew abt. (posting that on ao3). legendborn by tracy deonn, percy jackson (i’m not done with it so no spoilers please), mcu, the owl house, gravity falls, amphibia

i write songs and poetry, i play piano, ukulele, violin and guitar i like drawing but i’m not very good at it all the time, i have thousands of failed art pieces.

dni

the usual. if you discriminate against any minorities or hate people solely because of a group they belong to (religion/lack thereof, race, sexuality, gender orientation)

random shit about liggy

i have a gluten intolerance meaning i can’t have anything containing wheat, and i make jokes about it. well, brie does most the joking.

i have adhd and most likely a hint of something else neurodivergent. i’m a mess, but at least i’m not boringly neurotypical ur local owl (do not ask questions) i’m a minor so don’t be creepy, i don’t care abt interacting with adults as long as you aren’t being a creep i refer to myself in the third person sometimes, get the fuck over it gryffindor - enfp - scorpio

the rats (my moots) @jamespotterbbg — kay — my first moot, chaotic, mentally ill as the rest of this site, is the reason i��ve even interacted with half of these people @garden-of-runar — runaround — talented poet, fellow defender of bagels, absolutely and entirely concerning, you’ll never know her next move @melonhead10 — wife of mine — silly little rat, one of the only people on here i know irl, rarely online bc strict parents, if she is online it’s to look at shiny duo and tangled the series @eef-stars — british ethan — the gay dad friend of this whole hellsite. king of deactivating and coming back out of nowhere. happily in love with @kawaiibarty @kawaiibarty — james the baked bean — short, gay and irresponsible. has too many doggies but we don’t care bc doggies are great. changes his url every two seconds. in love with @eef-stars @tequilaqueen — bea — possibly an alcoholic, you’ll never know. hates bagels and commits war crimes. @picklerab23 — dill — lives in a jar on a shelf in a grocery store in wales. speaks in consonants and y’s. @crowleys-mortalcounterpart — brie — my child. genderfluid lesbian variant of remus lupin. descendant of the scottish. some unknown flavor of neurodivergent. i also know them irl. @0urazz — satan — brie’s sister and my daughter. chaos incarnate, addicted to regretevator and some other random ass roblox games. one step away from being gen alpha. the attention span and brain capacity of a grain of rice. violently affectionate. ik her irl as well @thejudeduarte — jude — cruel prince and legendborn fan. really nice and sometimes chaotic. @iamaladder — stepladder (ethan’s version) — chaotic aarakocra boi, old crusty man (in other words a year older than me) another person i know irl @thestrawberryapologist — mari — purchaser of jams, very goofy, does silly sitcom rp with me, recently returned to tumblr after disappearing on us

(if u want to be added ask me, i just gotta save it)

interactions

blow up my ask box, tag me on stuff, and message me all you want. i love being on here and talking to people and making friends <3

my pinterest poetry side blog: @liggy-attempts-poetry ask game: here ask game 2: here moodboard on banner is a collage on my pinterest

my tags: liggy rambles: all my random ass posts liggy found an ask: i answer asks liggy attempts to sing: i sing liggy attempts poetry: my (likely reblogged from side-blog) poetry nonsense liggy special: i most likely did something fucking stupid jam murder sitcom: a silly sitcom thing i do with mari to the queue you go motherfucker: my queued posts, likely because i’m out of townliggy rambles in the tags: i rant to everyone and no one in the tags

[royalsunshinehotel]

Hey, could you please (if your up to it, that is) do some headcanons with Dev Patel preferences about how each one will propose?

Proposal Preference (Dev Patel)

GIF by jcylenz

Anwar Kharral (Skins UK) Anwar's proposal is flashy of course. You really do see it coming from a mile away, and you better believe that the ring is insane. I don't think he's a comic book girlypop, but this doesn't mean he won't buy you something akin to Brie Larson's take on Thanos's Infinity gauntlet. If you're not careful, he's gonna take you to the top of a skyscraper and ask, and helicopter you off to an exotic location. Careful babe.

GIF by murddockz

Neal Sampat (The Newsroom) I think Neal gets kinda corny with it. He's away on an assignment, for about a month, and you're just at home and at work, languishing without him. You're chilling in the break room one night during a broadcast when Will proposes to you on Neal's behalf, during the broadcast. You turn around and your idiot has sneaked in to the building, and is currently on one knee waiting for an answer.

GIF by pateldevs

Saroo Brierly (LION) You guys have a beach proposal, obviously. The two of you, together, can come across as his being athletic, doing sporty things, and you watching from the beach, in a chair with an alcoholic beverage. It's a good dynamic, and it works. Saroo proposes, you can tell he's taking it so seriously, but there is definitely a seal corpse washed up nearby and he's actively trying to block it from your view, but it's okay. It's a good omen, you think.

GIF by miss-lauryn-hill

Sanjay Menha (The Wedding Guest) Honest to God, I think it's so quiet and so romantic. Jay spouts something that sounds like a Hozier song, how he'll "find you in every lifetime," and the two of you go back to bed asap. It's probably early in the morning, likely dawn, and you've just made him so happy.

GIF by spiderliliez

David Copperfield You see it coming from a mile away, because he's been agonizing over every single detail. It's beautiful, romantic, and a picnic, near the beach, but close enough to the house where you won't have to worry about sand and wind. To be honest, I feel like David may choke up and get sniffly before he actually gets the words out, so you have to simply take the ring box from him and lay on top of him to calm him down. He feels strongly about this okay?

GIF by jcylenz

Joshua Madika (Modern Love) If there's one thing that Joshua's gonna do, he's gonna make you feel special. But he's not gonna scare you. His money has been a divide between the two of you before, so he keeps it low key. Joshua buys a restaurant out for the evening so he gets to have a subtle flex, and have you all to himself. He enjoys watching you try every food you've ever seen online, and he loves it even more when you say tell him 'yes'.

GIF by ofallingstar

Gawain (The Green Knight) From the bottom of my heart, I truly think Gawain would rather have to propose to him. He is a prince, he is next in line for the throne. You will have to spell it out for him that you want him forever. These other bitches (read: princesses and aristocracy) shouldn't even try, to be honest.

GIF by irlvernon

The Kid (Monkey Man) I think the marriage concept is pretty foreign to him, but if the situation arises where he should need to braid you a blade of grass, he's gonna do it. He's gonna be with you forever, and he's going to do it.

[joyful-enchantress]

Evergreen | Loki x Fem!Reader

banner created by the amazing @springdandelixn

A/N: Hello! Enjoy this festive drabble that I wrote for @fictive-sl0th as part of the Secret Santa fic exchange that she so graciously organized. This can be read alone, but could also be considered a companion to I'm Dreaming of a Green Christmas.

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 1.3k (I know, I know... not technically a drabble)

Christmas Eve.

It was a special day for you and Loki -- it was the day he finally asked to court you after more than a year of relentlessly flirting with each other and finding every excuse to be together.

As you reminisced, you absent-mindedly reached your delicate fingers up to toy with the emerald pendant resting against your collarbone; Loki had gifted it to you this very night two years ago, when you both came to your senses and freed the feelings you had been harboring for each other for so long. You couldn't help the smile that graced your lips at the memory. He was your best friend. Your soulmate. Your person.

As always, you and Loki were planning to do your gift exchange for each other tonight, in the privacy of his own quarters. It was one of your favorite traditions you had begun with him, and it gave the two of you time to yourselves, away from the hubbub that inevitably would come tomorrow with Christmas Day in the Avengers Tower.

To celebrate the two years that you and Loki have been officially together, you wanted to do something special. For his gift this year, you had designed and ordered a custom Movado watch for him. The timepiece boasted a two-tone wrist strap of shining silver and yellow gold; the signature 12 o’clock dot and slender hands were cast in yellow gold, and set inside the golden case was the most stunning emerald green dial. On the back of the case you had engraved: The time I spend with you will never be enough. I love you, Loki. It was sleek, elegant, and beautiful — just like him.

The time came for you to head to Loki’s and you could barely contain your excitement; you restlessly bounced and rocked on the balls of your feet as you waited for the elevator to arrive on his floor. The gift box in your hands — blanketed in sleek black wrapping paper and tied off with a glittering emerald green ribbon — complemented your outfit perfectly. A skin-tight black turtleneck was tucked into a tea-length satin skirt of the richest emerald. Your look was completed with sparkling gold heels and, of course, your necklace.

The elevator dinged, signaling your arrival, and you rushed out and nearly skipped the whole way to his door. Before you could even knock, the door swung open, revealing the object of all your love, adoration, and desire.

“Loki…” you breathed. You would never tire of laying eyes on him — each time you did, it felt like the first. His raven curls were neatly slicked back, framing his perfect, angular face. He flashed you a beaming smile and his emerald eyes were alight with excitement and adoration. He was dressed to the nines, in his go-to all-black suit and tie combo, the tie clip you gifted him two years ago displayed proudly against his chest, the single emerald on it glittering when it caught the light. He was beautiful. And he was yours.

"Darling," he returned, "You look absolutely stunning." As he said it, he took your face in his hands and lowered his face to yours, meeting your lips in the most sensual kiss. It was slow and gentle, but there was an urgency to it, as if he might never get to kiss you again. Was he nervous about something?

"Merry Christmas and Happy Anniversary, Lohks. I've been looking forward to seeing you all day."

"As have I, my love. Every moment I'm not with you seems to drag on for eternity," he whispered against your lips. "Happy Anniversary and Merry Christmas, Y/N"

Once you peeled yourselves away from each other and made your way inside his quarters, you placed the gift box under the tree, and you noticed that it was the only one there. That's strange, you briefly thought to yourself for a passing moment, but there were more important matters at hand -- such as the devastatingly good-looking god sitting on the couch waiting for you to join him. You sat down together and enjoyed the hot cocoa he had made, complete with marshmallows and peppermint sticks.

"You're certainly dressed up this year, Loki. I mean, you always look dashingly handsome, of course, but a full suit and tie this year? I'm a lucky lady," you smirked at him.

He chuckled at your remark. God how you loved his laugh. "I wanted to brandish the exquisite gift you bestowed on me two years ago, darling," he explained while gesturing to the tie clip. "And that required wearing a tie. Plus," he continued, looking directly into your eyes, "this is a rather special day, as it marks two years that we've been together romantically. And I couldn't be happier, Y/N."

"Neither could I," you sighed contentedly.

As you sipped your hot cocoa, chatting and sharing the occasional chocolate-laced kiss, Christmas music was softly playing in the background. Everything was perfect in this moment.

"Well, darling, shall we exchange gifts then, before we get too lost in each other to remember or care?" he asked as he brushed his nose against your neck.

"Yes!" you exclaimed as you popped up from the couch and began walking towards the tree to retrieve his gift, blabbering on as you did. "Oh, Loki, I'm so excited for you to open yours, I really hope you like it. I wanted to do something a bit more special this year and --"

You were cut off mid-sentence and your jaw went slack at the sight before you as you turned around, Loki's watch box clasped tightly in your hand. Your best friend and lover was down on one knee, holding in his hands a small box that contained the most beautiful diamond ring you had ever seen. The ring had a twisted band of both platinum and yellow gold. The platinum parts of the twist were encrusted with emeralds, and led directly to the center stone -- a sparkling princess cut diamond -- where they formed a loose halo.

You gasped, speechless, as you approached him.

"Y/N, darling, I love you with everything that I am, and I toiled for weeks, endeavoring to come up with the perfect way to propose to you. Since you are deserving of all the Nine Realms, I wanted to make sure my proposal was lavish enough to reflect that. But then, I realized, there is nothing flashy or performative about our love. Our love is real, it is steadfast, and it is something that comes along once in a generation. It is timeless and beautiful to behold, without even trying. So here I am, in the one place we spend the most time together -- the place where we have shared the most treasured memories and sweet nothings -- asking you to spend the rest of your life with me. Y/N, will you do me the undeniable honor of becoming my wife?"

Tears of joy sprang from your eyes as you listened to him. You couldn't believe it. This was really happening.

"Of course I will," you managed to speak, "Yes, Loki, I'll marry you!"

At your words, he rose from his feet and placed the gorgeous ring on your left ring finger. Looking at him, you would have thought he had just conquered all Nine Realms, with the way his chest swelled with pride and his eyes swam with unshed tears of awe and adoration -- for you.

He wrapped you in a warm embrace and kissed you with more fire and passion than ever before, his soft lips moving against yours in a dance of celebratory ownership. Gone was the urgency from earlier; he was able to take his time now, knowing that you agreed to remain his for all your days.

You would happily don his colors forever. Ever his. Evergreen.

--------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed it! The 3-word prompt I was given to write towards was "Christmas Eve proposal" Many thanks to @fictive-sl0th for the prompt, for organizing this Secret Santa event, and for allowing me to participate, even though I was a late submission. You are a gem.

If you would like to see pictures of the watch and the ring from this fic, I have included them below.

[thewritingofspencerrose]

A Grid Thanksgiving

Logan Sargeant x OC

"And that closes up this wrap up for Vegas, we'll see you all next week in Abu Dhabi," an official closes, glancing around the room for someone to take the microphone from him, Logan Sargeant of all people being the one to do so, stepping on to the stage in an unusual move.

"Uh, if the grid could stick around for just a couple minutes that'd be great," the Williams driver requests, drivers left and right sharing looks.

And they wait, the crews and principles exiting the room before Logan, now without the microphone, has everyone crowd around.

"What's up kid?" Daniel is the one to ask, one brow raised at the American driver.

"I actually was sent on a mission from the missus-"

"You have a missus?" Max asks, the idea setting in over the last few races that he may not be all that young anymore.

Logan chuckles, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck with a nod. "Yeah, I'm going to try to not take that as an insult."

"That's not what he meant," Charles corrects, waving his hand. "You just do not seem as the type to settle down young and we haven't seen any woman with you around the paddock or online."

Logan knows they're right, but that doesn't change the fact that he's tired of always experiencing these assumptions.

"Welp, for eight months now we've been married, her names Brooke, and she sent me to work today with one request."

"Which was?" Oscar questions, expecting something outside the box from the woman who somehow manages his close friend.

"If you all out be available and on location next Tuesday, we've rented a rental apartment rather than a hotel room, and she was hoping you all and your significant others may be willing to join us for Thanksgiving."

"Isn't that typically on Thursdays?" Lando asks, already knowing the answer but hoping for something more.

"It is, but with the race and everything we won't be able to make it home to be with our families, so she got her heart set on cooking a traditional thanksgiving meal for all of you," Logan explains, knowing the request may be a stretch in a lot of places. As much as they respect one another, they are also all still competitors, even if Max and Red Bull had already won. "Its just an open invite, she just really loves the concept of taking a day to appreciate what you're grateful for and keeps saying she's grateful for all of you, even though she only knows you two," He finishes explaining, gesturing to Alex and Oscar. "And none of you have to come, absolutely don't feel like you've got to."

"When will you need numbers by?" Max speaks up, giving the boy a rare grin for a competitor. "I'll have to see if Kelly and P will be traveling with me."

And Logan beams, because at the very least, at least a few drivers are considering the offer.

"Sunday or Monday, Brie isn't planning to shop for anything until Monday."

Max nods, a simple gesture to wrap up the impromptu meeting.

——————————————————————————————————

"Baby, you said to invite the grid, why are you so surprised?" Lo questions with a chuckle, making me want to throw my whisk at him/

"Because I wasn't expecting a good chunk of them to text saying yes! How does Lewis Hamilton even have my number?!"

"He asked me for it so I sent it in the driver's chat," He explains simply, taking a finished dish from my hands to the kitchen island that we set up as a buffet. "Who ended up being available?"

"Carlos, Charles and Alex, Lando, Oscar and Lily, Lewis, Max with Kelly and P, Pierre and Kika, Yuki, George and Carmen, and Alex and Lily," I list smiling brightly at how bustling this home will be in no more than half an hour. "Valterri and the Haas men texted saying they would love to come but they were going home for a beat instead of straight here," I explain, scooping the whipped topping into the bag and twisting it shut.

"Wow, half the grid, good job Baby," Lo compliments, wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my temple.

"You're just lucky I didn't invite your boss just to get more baby snuggles," I can't help but jest, but he doesn't look remotely upset at the idea, smiling with a look in his eyes that I just can't place. "What's that look for?"

"You act like I wouldn't love to see you wondering around with a baby, although I'd prefer it to be ours," He admits, making my heart soar. It's before I can answer however that the doorbell rings, calling him away from a conversation we've had many times.

"Brie!" Lily exclaims as Oscar quietly follows her in, Lando following his teammate.

"Lils, it's been too long," I greet her with a hug, pulling both of the Mclaren drivers into hugs as well. "You need to come to more races, I'm always lonely."

"And what am I, chopped liver?" Kelly asks, announcing her little family's arrival, Max clapping Lo on the back as her little girl runs into my legs.

"B!"

"P! I've missed you sweetie," I coo, pulling her onto my hip and kissing her cheek, hugging Kelly and Max.

"P, what do we say to Brie and Logan?" Max prompts, smiling softly at his little girl and I.

"Thank you for inviting us to your American holiday!" She thanks, kissing my cheek before fist bumping Lo.

"I am so happy you all could come," I assure, looking around the progressively filling kitchen. "I love that we're all able to be together for one of my favorite holidays."

She smiles brightly, Max coming up to take her from me with the reasoning that I should be greeting guests as Alex and his Lily walk in, the Lily's being introduced.

And I can't help but smile around me, my heart warm as Lo joins me, wrapping me in his arms.

"Is this everything you wanted?" He asks, words whispering in my ear as he leans on my shoulder.

"Everything and more Lo, everything and more."

[heartfullofleeches]

What if darling orders from a different restaurant and brie coincidentally arrives right when the actual delivery person does? I feel like he'd be jealous af

Yan "Pizza Boy" + Reader

-

Who is that-

Arriving at your street, tires screech to a hault as your home rolls into view. The driver takes a second look. Then a third - knuckles white as fingers clench around the steering wheel.

A car he's never seen before sits in the little parking spot outside your house. His parking spot. Some old, beat up hatchback painted the ugliest shade of blue he'd ever seen - tape covering its left tail light and bumper held on by zip ties. By now, the delivery boy has made enough visits to your home to recognize cars of your friends and loved ones. Who is this? The flickering sign atop the rusting hunk of metal lifted some of the weight from his shoulders - only to crush him with a new fear as the other driver casual steps out of his vehicle, carrying bag strapped to his shoulder.

"Oh, hell no-"

Brie curses under his breath - pulling into your neighbor's driveway with one hand on the wheel as he reaches into the passenger seat with the other. He quickly gathers his things, kicking the driver's side door open as he goes to exit - hissing in frustration as his seat belt digs into the flesh of his neck. He unbuckles himself, shutting the door behind him with the heel of his sneaker as he races across your neighbor's yard. He slows down to carefully step over their hedges right as the other delivery person reaches your porch. Brie curses again-

"Oh my God! There's someone hiding in the back of that blue car with the dirty windows!"

The delivery person runs off back to their car. With little time to celebrate his victory, Brie marches up to your front door and rings the doorbell. You looked surprised - yet oddly happy to see him. His heart flutters.

"You?"

Brie beans from ear to ear "Yup! It's me! Got another pizza for you here. Same as the last."

"Thank you, but I already ordered from someplace else. Couldn't find anywhere nearby with alfredo sauce pizza so I had to settle for the usual."

You were looking for him?.... The place he works for that is. Brie shoves the box against your chest, biting down the scream ready to escape. "Don't worry, this one's on the house too. We're still experimenting with the recipe so it isn't available on our menu yet. I'm sure my boss will be happy to hear you enjoyed it."

"Well... Since it's free I guess it wouldn't hurt to take it off your hands. Won't have to order out for a week at this rate. Do you have a number I can reach you at?"

Multiple issues could arise from giving you his personal number - Brie was too excited to dwell on future problems when he had your attention now.

"Sure! Do you have a pen and paper?"

In the time it takes you to retrieve said items the other delivery person returns. He looks at Brie, a flicker of recognition in his eyes as he inspects his face.

"Hey... Aren't you-"

"Their boyfriend attacked a guy once."

The delivery driver looks taken aback. "What did you say?"

"I had a friend who worked at this one other pizza place. He had a black eye the last time we met. Said the person with the exact address had a scary looking boyfriend who thought he was flirting with them. He moved last we and I think I know why."

Brie's smile widen as the wobble in the other man's voice. "Hey, man... It's not cool to joke like that. If you're trying to scare me off you'll have to try harder than that."

"If that's what you want-"

Brie drops the conversation there. No point in wasting any more of his precious time - not with you standing there, pen and a small notepad in hand.

"Thank you~" Brie scribbles down his number, tearing off a page of paper beneath the one he wrote on as he hands the notepad back to you - pen still in his possession. With other matters to attend to, asking for it back was the last thing on your mind as you then turn to properly greet the other driver. Brie turns on his heels and makes his way down your driveway, checking over his shoulder as he drops the pen off the sidewalk - watching it roll by the rear bumper of the car.

"Whoops- Looks l dropped my pen."

Brie crotches down to grab the pen, eyes scanning the dented license plate as his fingers graze the pen. He picks it up, jotting down the license plate on the scrap of paper as he stands and walks off in the direction of his car.

One light broken is bad enough. He wonders how that other driver's boss would feel with all four smashed.

[ferretburger]

Crazy motherfucker named Joost Klein

Ik werd gepest op het schoolplein, nu heb ikke hoofdpijn (au)

Ik was 13 maar geen 13 in een dozijn

Paar jaar geleden en m'n bril die was gestroomlijnd

Ik had een dicht gordijn bij mijn kozijn

Ik zou ook boos zijn zonder mijn co-sign

En ze vragen mij: "Joost Klein

Hoe de fuck kan jij zo groot zijn?"

Ben in Oost-Berlijn, ik drink mijn rode wijn

M'n psychiater zei mij: "Jij hebt borderline"

Die woorden deden pijn

Net als stekels van een porcupine

Maar toch ben ik fris, net Robijn

Jij bent een pestkop, nee, je kan niet zo zijn

Check m'n website, dit is mijn domein

Maar na 20 jaar online, ben ik liever offline

Ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline (yes)

Ik, ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Ik, ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Werd geschopt, werd geslagen

Maar de pestkop noemde het plagen, dus ikke mocht niet klagen (wat?)

Mijn docent zei: "Je mag me alles vragen, er zijn geen domme vragen"

Dus ik vroeg: "Waar is mijn vader?"

Tien jaar later, ik drip zonder lekkage

M'n strafblad is wit, net wc-papier van Page

Ik ging door allemaal fases, ik luister André Hazes

Ik passeer de revue en ik passeer de passage

Mijn brein is een gekke salade

M'n leven is een quiz, je kan het antwoord niet raden

Net Kud, ik heb die groene en die paarse

Ze noemde me pappie, maar ikke ben geen Kraantje

Ik wacht al jaren en maanden

Maar ik blijf net als mijn ovaties staande

Ik teken graag op beslagen ramen

Ze wil m'n C-O-C-K net Baantjer, whut

Ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Ik, ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline (ah, yeah)

Ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Ik, ik ben liever offline, ik ben liever offline

Ik voel me Kooten en de Bie

Bitch, ik wil wat noten bij m'n brie

Joost Klein en de Tantu van de Beats

Da's een hele mooie symfonie

Ik voel me Kooten en de Bie

Bitch, ik wil wat noten bij m'n brie

Joost Klein en de Tantu van de Beats

Da's een hele mooie symfonie

joost are you invading my ask box now