#brb screaming into a fucking pillow

[lucawrites11]

what about friday's match made sarina think YOU KNOW WHAT LET'S DO THE EXACT SAME FUCKING THING??

like i know the goals that were conceded were good goals almost impossible defend but england were slow on the ball, poor in possession, failed to create chances, failed to get players in the box and failed to hold up the ball enough to string a couple of fucking passes together IT'S A JOKE there needs to be a tactical shift and speed introduced to the starting xi

[wistfulwatcher]

EMILY & HOTCH DANCING in 7.24 RUN

[anyasathenaeum]

Listen, I don’t have a type.

*sweating a lil* I swear, I don’t have a type, it’s just-

*sweating profusely* I MAY HAVE A TYPE OKAY MAYBE JUST MAYBE HAVE MERCY

[aiura-stan]

look im not a Saiteru shipper, but Teruhashi’s thoughts being the last and most extensive that break through to Saiki, and her request being a prayer to God, which Saiki answers, and then immediately admits that he likes troublesome things, really fucking gets me

[burningtacozombie]

excuse me for a minute while I'm fanning myself...

[too-many-rooks]

Terrible day at work. Just abysmally bad. The kind of full-disassociation-at-the-bus-stop-staring-into-space-like-a-shell-shocked-trench-soldier bad day. Not crying on the bus being was a major victory.

[becomingabeing]

Nueng, the only son and heir of a mafia family, loved and nurtured and sheltered his whole life while acutely aware that his future is a foregone conclusion telling Palm, the boy who has had to work all his life, with a future that was as uncertain as the choppy waters he loves so much until his father signed his life over to protect another's son, that no one owns his life, does things to me.

[worth-the-chaos]

Guys I fucked up my opportunity for a meet cute with the boy I think is super cute (that I haven’t talked to yet). Fuck.

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

When you love someone so much but you're almost certain that they don't reciprocate but you can't stop looking for signs and there MIGHT be something there but maybe you're just seeing things and you just adore them and can't stop thinking about them and you want to tell them you love them so badly and kiss them and take them on dates and spend the rest of your life with them but you can't risk ruining what you have and

Because

Yeah

[boyslugs]

got told last night that if i ever got a biopic saiorse ronan should be a potential casting for me and i was like "oh nice" because i forgot what she looks like. i have just been reminded what she looks like and HELLO???? I AM FUCKING HONORED???

[burningtacozombie]

at what point am I allowed to just PASS THE FUCK OUT?! this man is... a lot to process...

MORE KING BLORBO BOY TOY. 

*Falls on floor*

[nordarknessdimsthesky]

A linguistic analysis of tumblr hyperbole in the tags

This post expands my previous analysis of hyperbolic reactions to cluster tags by themes. There were too many themes, some of them overlapping, to create a cohesive graph. Instead, I present several overarching themes from a data set of 50 tags observed and documented in various corners of tumblr.

1. Feeling Normal™️

Tags within this cluster profess Normal feelings (read: extreme excitement, enthusiasm, obsession, derangement, etc.).

#mmmmrrrghuhhhhghhh #I'm so normal about it teehee #absolutely not rending my clothing #feeling very normal and not feral at all #i will simply never recover #gif sets sent to personally destroy me #i can't cope #the eyes #i'm a puddle #i am INCONSOLABLE #i am DISTRAUGHT #IM NOT OKKAAAAAAYYYYYY #FEELING TOTALLY ONE HUNDRED PERCENT NORMAL

2. Feralness

The following data points conjure animalistic behavior. There’s a non-zero amount of biting and chewing involved.

#chomping biting barking #biting my arms off #rattling my cage #[incoherent biting noises] #chewing glass #chewing through wood #*shaking the bars of my enclosure* HELLO!!!!!!!! #climbing the walls #biting gnawing chewing #im gonna rip off my front door and eat it

3. Noisy Emotional Outbursts

These tags encompass crying, screaming, yelling, and other loud reactions.

# shaking sobbing crying #SCREAMIIIING BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL #*no thoughts only wailing* #i am SOBBING #IM CRYING LIKE A BITCH #*just fucking yelling* #S C R E A M #screeching into a pillow #brb sobbing for 5-7 business years

4. Throwing

All of these tags except the last one involve being thrown instead of throwing things. I, personally, am entertained by the range of places/situations people are throwing themselves into.

#i am going to THROW MYSELF into the SEA #hurl me into the sea #hurl me into the sun #trebuchet me into the sun #hurl me straight at europa #vent me out of an airlock #slam me against a wall #put me in a box and throw me down the stairs #throwing myself into traffic you know? #just defenestrate me already #defenestrate me #absolutely hurl me through plate glass #i'm going to start tossing furniture

5. Bodily Harm

There’s a good deal of overlap with the previous theme. Nearly all of the tags involving throwing would result in varying degrees of bodily harm. Here are the tags outside of the Throwing subgroup.  

#im going to throw upppppp #tearing my hair out #banging my head against the wall #SCREAMIIIING BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WALL #biting my arms off #microwaving myself #crumple me up and microwave me

6. Absurdism

My personal favorite cluster. The imagery conjured and resulting comedic hyperbole is just [chef’s kiss].

#im gonna rip off my front door and eat it #crumple me up and microwave me #put me in a box and throw me down the stairs #defenestrate me #absolutely hurl me through plate glass

7. Keysmashes

These tags center less around meaning and more around style, so they form the last group. A handful of these could fall under Noisy Emotional Outbursts because they represent reaction noises. In my linguistic judgment, keysmashing increases the hyperbole – consider augh versus aughfhghghghhh – the latter reads as prolonged and more intense emotionally.

#aghdjakgsjadhjaka * #hrhrhrhgnnnghhhhh #aughfhghghghhh #mmmmrrrghuhhhhghhh #I'm so normal about it teehee #waughfhghghh #oughhhhghghhh

*one digression in a friend discord server was how people interpret keysmashes in their minds. Some hear the first couple letters and then some sputtering, others hear static. It’s a common joke that you need a minor in linguistics to understand conversations in this friend group. Such is the nature of things when the chaos linguist energy is strong.

[moodywyrm]

Cockwarming w ellie, except you get too worked up n start pushing onto it and then the rest is alll u babe🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

nonnie the noise I let out was fucking inhuman ,,,,, u can't just say this shit to me i'll go insane

I imagine that Ellie can be such a lil shit when she wants to be, so just fucking imagine coming to her all needy n whiny n hor knee one day, literally begging her to fuck you (in a cool consensual way). n she's like sorry baby I have work to do (no she doesn't) but you can sit on my strap n wait for me like a good girl :) (it's all part of her plan) n ur like ok yeah I'll take it pls bb

so she makes u strip, n then she strips down to a wife pleaser (way cuter name for those tank tops) n her boxers, puts on the strap, sits down n her big gaming chair n hauls u onto her lap. helps u sink down, but right as u try to start bouncing she holds u down with her deceptively strong arms.

'no baby, we made a deal. just sit here n be good for me' n ur all pouty but u agree, draping ur arms around her shoulders n tucking ur face into her neck, pressing ur tits against her chest, trying to just zone out, maybe snooze (probably not) while u wait for her. n Ellie, the lil shit, is really just doing some busy work that she could absolutely delay. so she starts running a hand up n down ur back, making u shiver, wiggling 'to get more comfortable' but really just so the 6in girthy strap shifts around inside u n makes u squirm. it takes like fifteen minutes for u to snap out of it n realize what she's doing, bc she hasn't typed or moved anything on her desk for a while, caught up in teasing u. n u, mildly annoyed at her antics, just sit up and brace both hands against her shoulders, pushing her against the back of the chair n frowning.

'ur just teasing me for fun >:(' all pouty. n she's like ??? no??? (liar) n she's about to get back to her antics when u pull her hands of ur waist and hold them down against the arm rest, basically pinning her down while u start grinding against her. u tip ur head back n starting bouncing, whining and moaning for her, n she swears she's never seen u look so needy. ur covered in a sheen of sweat from her teasing, ur neck all pretty n exposed, ur tits bouncing n ur thighs slapping against hers, n she can't do a goddamn thing.

'fuck, baby, u really needed me, huh?' she murmurs, trying to move her hands n moaning when u move one to ur waist n the other to ur tits. u lean forward, ur tits in her face, n place ur hands on the back of the gaming chair so u can bounce even harder. the change in pace n position makes the strap hit her clit through the boxers, n she moans so loud it catches her off guard. she's basically pawing at u, mouthing at ur tits n whispering praises against ur skin, her eyes rolling back with the friction against her clit getting more n more intense.

n then, u switch to grinding, pulling her face away from ur tits n holding it in both hands while u kiss her, sloppy n whiny but so fucking good. the grinding puts constant, delicious pressure on her cunt n her legs start shaking. knowing she's about to snap, she moves one hand down to ur sweet lil cunt n starts toying with ur clit, moaning into ur mouth when u let out the sweetest, choked out lil whine, shaking against her as she pushes u over the edge, one hand still toying with ur sensitive nipples. seeing u cum for her so prettily really fucking does it for her, bc she starts cumming so hard she whites out for second, panting into ur mouth as u whine, the both of u writhing n moaning n gripping at each other as u ride out ur highs.

once u both come down n are trying to regain ur breathing, she just goes 'holy shit' n u look at her n give her a lil smack on the arm, more of a pat really, before going 'u asshole' n giving her a sweet lil kiss <3

i need to go scream into my pillow brb

[for-a-longlongtime]

CALLING ALL THE BISEXUALS

it appears we have been summoned

by the bi lighting*

to come look at him

LOOKIT.

Stop it he's so fucking beautiful

i can't even stand it anymore

brb need to go scream in a pillow

(* bisexual lighting is a cinematic/art thing, yes)

ty @magpiepills for the line 'summoning the bisexuals', I just had to make a post with it 💜

(I'm not defining him ok, I'm just pointing out the bat signal for all of us bi's here on Tumblr so don't come for me, just enjoy the pretty picture)

honary mention to @immarocketman because i swear to god I had to take a second look, for a moment i thought it was one of your gorgeous Din paintings!

[windswhispvrs]

𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐀 time when her vision had been clouded by her own denial -- that their little girl was gone. amara would cling to the memories with every ounce of her being, no matter how much such force left her fingers battered and bruised. how purple they became. ignorance is a brutal yet beautiful monster -- hanging its glamor over her eyes before she could even blink. it had always been better this way, when she was alone. no one to shield from the horror stories of the world, no one to save from themselves. and yet, the loneliness she had come to know so well had not just managed to overcome her -- but render her unable to speak of its existence.

while it may not have shown in her words ( in true fashion -- out of her own self-preservation ), today, it showed in her actions. for so many years luke and amara's unity had stood stronger than any wall of brick and mortar, any iron of steel. in the days after she had set the papers that damned them on the antique kitchen table, amara followed the same path she had tread down her entire life: swallow it. swallow down the pain until your throat runs dryer than sandpaper, until you are gasping for air, choking on all the things you've done, the mistakes you've made. the pain will go away eventually.

temporary anguish for hopefully permanent salvation. even if hope may be a fools game, the reflex has become engrained with her, woven into the fabric of her being.

the man who stood across from her felt so familiar -- dare she say it -- like returning home. perhaps what scared her the most was that she had never had a true home before. there are times she thinks back to the trailer where she spent the formative years of her life, the one she had tried so desperately to hide from him, hide from jessica. and while it is the inhabitants who make a home, she had found some kind of twisted comfort in the thought of it meeting its demise. a trial by fire. roaches. it had never been a home to her, nothing more than a dilapidated set of four walls littered with the shards of her childhood.

something in her hates how scared he is to approach her, but the thought is quickly swept away when she reminds herself that such a reaction is her doing. it is she who pushed him out to sea. while the effects of the passage of time have made themselves known, so much of him remains untouched. the same stance. the way his eyes wrinkle at the edges as he squints. when you succumb to devotion, when it's broken -- you're left with the reminder that you've learned to love absolutely everything about its subject. even the things that seem so simple, the minute details.

what do you think she'd be up to nowadays? the question tortures her more than she cared to admit. her subconscious would construct timeline after timeline that would never come true. " i- " amara begins, hand coming to rest over her heart, as she did in times where she missed her daughter the most. she would live forever there. " i just hope she would be better than us. better than we ever were. " five years. five years of missed birthdays, holidays, successes and failures. something in her cracks open all over again when she thinks about their last conversation, knowing what she knows now...

" nothing feels right without her. "

Walking with purposeful slowness from the parking lot to the gravesite, Luke thinks how unfair it is that time continues to pass after the most important people in your life die.

Five years. Had it really only been five years? He thinks about five years, considers how in such a short amount of time he and Amara had met Jessica for the first time, watched her eyes open and recognize them, learn to laugh and talk and walk and decide her favorite color. That time moved so quickly, but now that she was gone, the days felt only like...waiting. Waiting until the day he could see her again.

Amara is already here: he'd seen her car in the parking lot, but now he sees her standing by the tombstone, holding a bouquet. He's nervous - he considers that maybe their meeting is a bad idea and he expects to dread the sight of her, but the closer he gets, Luke realizes that his love for Amara is as strong as ever, even after everything. Perhaps grief was good for putting things in perspective.

Luke comes to stand alongside her, tries not to disrupt but he startles her just with crunching of grass underfoot. He puts his hands in the pockets of his jeans, braces his shoulders against the sudden cold, and ducks his head in a little nod. "Yeah," he answers after a long moment, and his voice wants to break too, but he pulls it together. A mother's grief needed its space; no matter how painful this was for him, it had to be leagues worse for her. "What do you think she'd be up to nowadays?"

[ohsc]

nsfw headcanons you ask? don’t mind if i do :) LMAO

sam and a spit kink…. LISTEN, it won’t leave my mind and i just can not stop thinking about messy dirty make-out sessions omfg i need to be PUT DOWN

and dean? to me, personally, would fuckin LOVE his partner riding him, just the position and even just thigh riding he’d fucking EAT IT UP like he’d be smug as hell with his partner using him to get off while he just sits there, encouraging but also like ‘aw, you need help?’ like 😵‍💫🙂‍↕️

i’ve thought about this too much bc i’m ovulating IS THAT TMI AHSJDKSJS IDK 😭

SAM AND A SPIT KINK AKDJWKFKE AAGH BRB SCREAMING INTO MY PILLOW YES

honestly feel like sam loves like getting filthy with sex when he gets into it, like messy make outs and spit ( @sammyluvr put the idea of him being turned on by his partner drooling into my head and i can’t get it out) and i mean. i think it’s a solid agreement across the entire fandom that he likes to eat his partner out and he gets messy with it literally like a starved man. also feel like he’s the type to like cum on his partner’s belly/chest because the sight drives him CRAZY

AND YES THAT IS LITERALLY DEAN AODJWD OH MY GOD listen that man low-key LOVES being on the bottom he loves being ridden like gripping onto his partners hips and getting to look up at them and kiss at their chest and neck and YES he’s such a smug asshole he’d be teasing the ENTIRE time

ilysm destiny i need to go take a cold shower now 😵‍💫😵‍💫