#bet ya can't

[finemealprompt]

DP x DC Prompt #51

Damian would like it on the record that this is Todd's fault. If Todd hadn't encouraged Damian to start making fan art, he wouldn't be in this mess. Stupid Todd, Damian should've known better than to listen to him.

But here he was, blushing like mad as he nervously asked his favorite author to sign the fan art he had made for his book. He was such an idiot! Danny Fenton surely would be-

"Oh this is amazing! Do you have any prints I can buy off of you?"

Damian will swear up and down he did not faint.

[muirmarie]

thinking about if tos mccoy had died before romulus was destroyed, tos spock could've been carrying his not-quite-a-katra during the events of the aos movies

[refinedstorage]

having to pause and evaluate whether or not an art is AI

[incorrect-splatoon]

Dedf1sh: Okay, hum, I never tell you that so before you continue I need to tell you. I am trans.

Callie: Pussy ?

Dedf1sh: Uh no.

Callie: Cock ?

Dedf1sh: Uh yes.

Callie : Great, love both of thoses~

[onnahu]

My dear tumblr friends, look at those little guys! Look!

They're super cute, but also looking like they're constantly judging you.

Anyway, this is a fieldfare or, in my native language - kwiczoł. As a kid I always called them a little eagles, and they may not look like eagles, but if they were bigger, they would look more like an eagle than an eagle does and I stand by that.

And I'm not biased in saying that kwiczoł is more fitting, bc kwik/kwiczeć you can translate to squeal, and this one squeaks like crazy.

But! It's not the reason it's one of my fav birds - definitely top 5.

Fieldfare is a little bird, but there are smaller ones. And, fieldfares are protective of pretty much everything that's smaller than them and a bird. Especially droździki - redwings, likes to group with them. And fieldfares are just like 'Yeah, sure, you can join our little family. You're small and actually pretty similiar to us. New cousin everybody!'.

Anyway, it became a thing in bird world, that in the area that fieldfares have their nests, a lot of little ones are too, so they can use them as protection.

And it's a wild protection. They don't have sharp beaks or claws. What they have is well functioning renal system. So, when they are being attacked, they literally poop-splash their enemies away. Or when any little bird is attacked, really. They're very protecive.

Also, after birdies leave the nests, they sometimes still get feed by their parents. It's just that sweet overbearing parenting when you see your child go and are like 'Maybe they're too thin... I should feed them a little more. Just in case.'.

I fucking love them.

[cautiously0ptimistic]

𝕄𝕪, 𝕞𝕪, 𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕤𝕖 𝕖𝕪𝕖𝕤 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕗𝕚𝕣𝕖;                                          𝕀'𝕞 𝕒 𝕨𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕕 𝕚𝕟𝕤𝕖𝕔𝕥—                                                                            𝕐𝕠𝕦'𝕣𝕖 𝕒 𝕗𝕦𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕒𝕝 𝕡𝕪𝕣𝕖.

[catzgam3rz]

Share all the profile pics u made for urself so far?

Miiiight've missed a few but these were all I could find between scouring my Blog's archive as well as what I had on my current computer lmao

Broadly from around December 2016 - June 2023 :D

More exact dates under the cut!

Left to Right, Top to Bottom

Dec 1 2016, Feb 3 2017, Sep 10 2017

Nov 2 2017, Oct 7 2018, Dec 15 2018

Apr 30 2019, Oct 1 2020, Sept 11 2021,

Nov 29 2020, Mar 1 2021, Oct 13 2021,

Apr 5 2022, Oct 11 2022, Jun 12 2023

[ilikecarsandlike4people]

I've spiked a bit of a fever and my joints feel like fire.... I truly cannot catch a break this year, huh. I am hoping it'll past fast because I can't miss work on Wednesday, but knowing my immune system....... it's a slim chance. I have a few posts lined up so don't worry, but yeah, hands need a break (as does everything else) and I'll be back soon enough. In the meantime, going to use all my available movement and energy on comms, slow but steady progress. Hope you've had a good day, and to those that were watching the 24 race, get some sleep. -R

[skylertheminish]

5. There's a few I'll eat but won't exactly go out of my way to get so meh. I can't stand muscles and such! It's like eating an oily rubber/eraser. Same thing with mushrooms but it's the texture (and the smell when fried). Avocados I'm just not a fan of. I don't get why they're so hyped. Plus they're expensive as all hell in the UK.

This could be fun. I scored 11. How about you?

[finemealprompt]

DP x DC Prompt #71

When Stephanie first discovered her father was Cluemaster, she knew what she had to do. She knew she had to spoil his plans, and make it known to the world. She had to be smart about it, however. If he found out it was her behind it, he could do something bad to her. Or worse, bad to her brother, Danny.

[graunblida]

lexa's gonna challenge mayor fisk to a bench contest ( with the help of envy, of course ). if he wins he'll get a crisp high-five, if she wins she'll get to say " you embarrassed me in front of vanessa " on live television!

[sufficientlylargen]

It always gets me that the name "Gandalf" literally just means "Wand-Elf" or "Stick-Elf". I'm imagining old Gondorians just being like:

Librarian: I saw that weird guy at the library again today.

Guard 1: What weird guy?

Librarian: The old guy with the beard? Kinda elfy-looking, apart from the beard?

Guard 1: Oh, with the big-ass stick?

Librarian: Yeah, looked like he was carrying an entire tree branch.

Guard 2: Yeah, that's the Stick Elf.

Guard 1: Hell yeah, I fuckin' love the Stick Elf.

Librarian: The "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: He comes by every few years, usually after some weird book or other.

Librarian: Oh. Yeah, he wanted a treatise on goblin breeding habits.

Guard 2: Like, how they have sex? We have books on that?

Librarian: Yeah, turns out we do. I was as surprised as you are.

Guard 1: What'd the Stick Elf need a fuckin' goblin-fuckin' book for?

Librarian: I didn't ask. So you just call him "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: I mean, he looks kinda elfy and he always has that stick, so, like, yeah.

Guard 1: Dude also has some fuckin' dope pipeweed.

Guard 2: Oh yeah, his pipeweed is awesome.

Librarian: How long has he been coming here?

Guard 2: Oh, for decades. He's, like, super old.

Guard 1: More like fuckin' centuries. Dude's old as balls.

Guard 2: Wait, really?

Guard 1: Yeah, my gran-gran used to talk about him. She loved his pipeweed too.

Librarian: So he's… an immortal pipeweed dealer?

Guard 2: I think he's just, like, a connoisseur. He doesn't sell it or anything. He just always has some really top-notch pipeweed on him.

Archivist: Oh, are we talking about Stick Elf?

Guard 1: Hell yeah we are!

Librarian: You know about the Stick Elf, too?

Archivist: Oh, totally. Stick-Elf's a super chill dude. Gave me some awesome pipeweed when I was maybe 12, and tee-bee-aitch I think I'm still a little buzzed from it.

Guard 1: What'd I tell ya, fuckin' dope pipeweed!

Archivist: Also he's really old.

Guard 1: Old as balls.

Librarian: Yeah, so Éodan and Jenniforomir were telling me.

Archivist: My grandpa used to tell me stories - he said one time he saw Stick Elf enter a smoke-ring contest.

Guard 1: Ooh, I'll bet he kicked fuckin' ass.

Archivist: Apparently the guy made an entire warship out of smoke and it flew around shooting down the other rings.

Librarian: And how much of this "fuckin' dope" pipeweed had your grandfather had by this point?

Guard 1: No no, that's totally plausible. Dude's got weird elf powers and shit for sure.

Archivist: He brought fireworks for the king's birthday one year, too.

Guard 1: Oh fuck, I forgot about those! Fuckin' incredible fireworks! Dragons and knights and glowy trees and shit! I was fuckin' 6 years old or something, they totally blew my mind. Hey Éodan, did you see that shit?

Guard 2: No, I think that's before I lived in Gondor.

Guard 1: Wait, you're not from here?

Guard 2: Oh, no, I grew up in Rohan. We moved here when I was, like, thirteen because my uncle Éojeff said he could get my dad a sweet job. And also that there were houses that didn't smell like horseshit.

Guard 1: Oh shit, are you related to Éojeff and Éosteve who run that æbleskiver stand on Norndîl St?

Guard 2: Yeah, they're my uncles!

Guard 1: Shit, they cook a fuckin' great æbleskiver!

Librarian: Ok, hold up a sec, "Stick Elf" can't possibly be his real name.

Guard 1: Why not?

Librarian: What? You think his parents named him in the hopes that he would carry around a fucking tree when he got older?

Guard 2: Maybe they gave him the tree when he was born!

Archivist: I don't think a baby could carry that stick.

Guard 1: You ever seen a baby hanging onto something? They're hella strong.

Archivist: It's not a strength thing, their hands are tiny. That staff is enormous!

Guard 1: My halberd's bigger 'n I am, I can hold it just fine.

Archivist: You're not a baby.

Librarian: Also why would elf parents name their kid "stick ELF"?! Presumably they know that their kid's going to be an elf!

Archivist: Is he actually an elf? I didn't think they grew beards.

Guard 1: How'd he get old as balls if he's not an elf?

Guard 2: His ears aren't that pointy. Maybe he's just a really old guy? Like, a Numémoriam or something?

Guard 1: Did you just say "Numémoriam"?

Guard 2: Nûnenorman? Munimõrbitan? Y'know, those guys like the king that can get super old.

Guard 1: You mean the fuckin' Númenóreans?

Guard 2: Yeah, the Númenóreums.

Archivist: Even the Númenóreans don't live THAT long.

Guard 1: Plus he carries that fuckin' stick around.

Guard 2: Wait, what does the stick have to do with it?

Guard 1: That's an elf thing. Y'know, trees and shit? Very elfy.

Librarian: Ok, look, but his parents naming him "Stick Elf" would be weird whether or not he's an elf. In fact, it's even weirder if he's not - what human names their kid "elf"?

Archivist: Huh. Yeah, you're right, he probably does have another name.

Guard 2: Yeah, I guess so.

Librarian: He's been coming here for decades and nobody's ever asked his real name?

Archivist: I dunno what to tell you, he's Stick Elf. Even his library card just says 'Stick Elf'.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah, the Stick Elf!

Guard 2: Maybe we could, like, ask him his name sometime?

Guard 1: Hey, look, Elrond's over there. He's old as balls too, maybe he knows?

Guard 2: Oh, we shouldn't interru-

Guard 1: HEY ELROND, YOU'RE OLD AS BALLS, RIGHT? WHAT'S THAT OLD ELF WITH THE STICK'S NAME?

Elrond (coming over): Do you mean an old man cloaked all in grey and blue, leaning on a rough-cut staff, who came to the great library this day?

Guard 1: Yeah, the Stick-Elf!

Guard 2: (Sorry to bother you, sir...)

Librarian: He's got to have a real name besides 'the Stick Elf', right?

Elrond: Indeed, for no elf is he. You speak of the wizard Olórin, wisest of the Maiar, older even than Eä itself. Many are his names in many countries: Tharkûn among the Dwarves; Incánus to the south; Mithrandir he is called among my people, the Grey Pilgrim.

Librarian: Oh.

Elrond: And here in the North he is called Stick-Elf.

Librarian: Oh.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah!

[teledyn]

No need to know your own limits, we have that covered.

[outtamynoggin]

Bruce's emotional support system

Tim: *To Jason who just walked in* Bruce is brooding into his eggs again.

Bruce: *glaring at Tim* I'm fine

Alfred: Sir, I distinctly recall making french omelette, not poached eggs.

Jason: *ignoring Bruce* Is he crying about Dick again?

Barbara: Of course he is. Who else?

Jason: I can't believe I was raised by a man who can’t function without a circus acrobat holding his hand. One is crazier than the other and ya never know who.

Alfred: Master Dick is currently busy with other matters.

Jason: With who??

Barbara: The Titans

Jason: ...oh. I kinda get it now

Tim: Yeah, Bruce isn't getting him back for a while. The Titans would riot first.

Bruce: I. Do. Not. Need. Dick.

Barbara: You literally texted him 40 times, called him 4 times, and intercepted Titans communications twice just this morning to command him to come back to Gotham 'this instant' for a city emergency. It just turned 7 AM three minutes ago.

Bruce: ...He's neglecting his duty!

Barbara: *deadpan* There is absolutely no emergency. There isn't even a mouse making trouble right now.

Bruce: *angrily storming down to the batcave*

Barbara: *Drinking another cup of coffee* How much do you want to bet that he's going down there to spy on Dick.

Jason: Nothing. Here's a better offer - how much do you wanna bet on what Dick'll do when he finds out Bruce has been spying on him?

Tim: I'm in!

[daisukekambehateaccount]

negativity ahead be cautious

is feeling indescribably shitty every single day even more so than normal for the past three months seasonal depression even if there are only 2 seasons in your country

[angelsrcute]

I suck his dick, it's big, it's very-very big! ᝰ.ᐟ✮⋆˙

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who'd make you cockwarm him while he works, the door unlocked, his dick so close to your g-spot but he wouldn't let you move! hands keeping your waist in place as his dick keeps you all stuffed n warm.

“I'll be done soon, sweetheart, you can wait a little more right? So, be a good girl n stop movin’ so much.”

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who'd praise you for sucking him off so good, tears forming at the corner of your eyes as you try not to gag on his huge dick. Guiding your tongue on his dick, gently holding your hair, shooting thick ropes of cum in your mouth.

“God, your mouth feels so good, my sweets. Keep goin’ alright? looking so pretty f’ me.”

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who'd taunt n insult you while you gag on his dick, roughly grabbing your hair and making you take him fully. Your mascara n lipstick all ruined, eyes rollin’ back when he cums in your mouth. :(

“You look like some cheap whore like this, y'know. I bet you're getting wet from me degrading you, hm? As expected.”

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who'd fuck you in a mating press, his big cock stretching your insides, hitting your womb. Pressin’ his hand on your tummy to feel his dick in you, making you whine. Your tummy already full from how much he cums, you definitely can't go for another round.. + he's gonna fuck you till you need a wheelchair.

“It won't fit? Don't worry, darlin’. Gonna make your cunt remember my dick, don't worry! Even if it does forgets, I'll just fuck ya again.”

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who'd fuck you till your dumb n can only think of him and his dick if you do decide to act all bratty or he'd just tie you up n put a vibrator on your clit and watch as you squirm around trying to get a release, but he turns off the vibrator just when you're gonna cum. :(

"Should've thought before being like that, what did you expect, princess? acting all flirty with that random guy, trying to make me jealous."

◟♡ ˒ ʾʾ — who’re either super experienced from sleeping around or just fucking virgin losers, walkin’ around with that big ass dick in his pants.

— FYODOR, Leona, Dazai, NIKOLAI, Beel, Chuuya, Diavolo, SEBEK, Lucifer, Malleus, MAMMON, Jack, Blade, Neuvillette, Sampo, IDIA, Zhongli, Scara, CHILDE, TOJI, Jing yuan, Gojo, Sukuna, NANAMI, Dr. ratio, Wriothesley, ALHAITHAM, CATER + your favs.