#because we have to put ourselves out
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Jumping onto your post about Tommy and cancel culture. People need to remember the general audience for 9-1-1 is people in their forties and fifties, who most likely did shitty things very similar to the things Tommy did in the begins episodes at one point in their lives, then grew and changed in the same way he did. So the notion that the show would circle back to before this obvious growth and portray him as some sort of irredeemable monster is laughable. Because they would be alienating a big chunk of their audience by doing that.
Post that Anon is talking about for reference (it could also be this one but the other one links back to this one anyway)
This is exactly why I have a love-hate relationship with Josh's monologue from Episode 6!! Because it is absolutely true that younger queer people (or queer people who came out in more recent years) who haven't learned their history could never understand the kind of things people had to do to protect themselves. And I immediately clocked that the whole plotline about Abby was supposed to be an indirect explanation for why Tommy acted the way he did in the flashback episodes and it was actually the writers subtly speaking to the viewers who still didn't understand. And that's such an important conversation to have but I don't know why they didn't just make the episode about that instead of bringing Abby into it.
Like, it would have been so much more impactful and just as easy if, instead of Tommy offhandedly mentioning he was Abby's ex-fiance, Chim and Hen were joking about how Tommy used to act when Gerard was captain of the 118. And instead of Buck not understanding why a gay person in the 2000s wouldn't feel safe enough to come out, he could wrestle with the fact that Tommy had once been a bigot who hurt his friends and we could see him work through that with the viewers.
I dunno if they just didn't know how to write that or if they're afraid they wouldn't be able to redeem Tommy to certain viewers if they acknowledged that part of his backstory and preferred to just keep ignoring it in the hopes that people would just move on. But the fact is that Tommy's story is relatable to so many people who watch 9-1-1 and I'm sure a lot of them were excited to see that portrayed on TV. And I'm just really sad for those people who have to see other fans act like they don't deserve to be happy.
Queer history isn't all drag queens and Stonewall riots. It's also people like Tommy who had to hide who they were and do shit they shouldn't have because not everyone is brave enough to throw the first brick. Even today, being queer in real life isn't always like Heartstopper or Buddie fanfictions. Sometimes it's scary and it's messy and there are so many good people who do a lot of bad shit out of fear. And maybe you don't think that's right but it happens and those people deserve the chance to redeem themselves and be a part of the community. It's time we start telling their stories too, not just the perfectly noble ones.
#maybe you've never actively participated in racist or homophobic actions like tommy did#but if you claim you've never allowed people around you to say something bigoted without speaking up or calling them out#because you were afraid of what would happen to you#you're either a liar or extremely privileged#and you either need to do some soul-searching or you need to sit down learn your history and listen to what others have to say#because i think we can all see a little of ourselves in tommy#and it's so important for us to be able to acknowledge that that behavior isn't right#but it is possible to redeem yourself and make up for it if you put in the work#911 discourse#911 abc#911 show#tommy kinard#bucktommy#tevan#buck x tommy#thank you thank you for the ask
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Friends, I'm taking a break. A REAL break, this bloody revision will get finished when it gets finished because me smashing my face into this manuscript and getting nowhere because I'm so burnt out I can barely function enough to keep afloat let alone do all the heavy lifting I've had to over the past few months, when I'm six chapters from the end, six chapters that a year ago, would have probably been relatively EASY for me to sort out, is STUPID. I want this book, which I LOVE, to be done well more than I want it to be done fast, and I want to be sane afterwards more than either of those things.
#the reasons why I'm in this state? are 98% NOT ON ME#where my 2% are “too inexperienced to recognize I was being asked to do unreasonable and inappropriate amounts of free labour”#and “not putting my foot down the second I started to realize it for fear of tanking my career before it started”#Anyway publishing has done it's best to destroy me and I say YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME#we are taking the time we need to tend to ourselves#our mental health and our precious creative energy in this house#and then FINISHING WHAT WE LOVE IN A WAY WE'RE PROUD OF OUT OF SHEER FUCKING SPITE IF THATS HOW IT HAS TO BE#to delete later probably because yeahhhh
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It just keeps happening
#forgot that both of them are considered 'not alive' through character design#and both of them are old#oh both of them attempt or do commit child murder as well#which is actually pretty standard for a disney property i think#but yeah the insect transformation is pretty niche. especially when its kinda thematically coupled with loss of the self in both cases#though both cases do backtrack on it. and one of them then attempts to go into it again#and then doesnt really make it explode. not their fault admittedly but yeah there is a weird back and forth with that. like ok are we losin#the self in this place or nah? are we literally killing the god we claim to worship (and metaphorically killing the one we do worship)#and putting ourselves in his place or? like is that still on the menu or is that cancelled? like are we just doing it physically#with none of the horrible implications for the state of our psyche now or?#anyway yeah pretty funny#can i have 5 more of these little bitches. new type of guy theyve been testing out for 12 years#ok admittedly i do think the stag beetle one was better because it also incorporated the deer themes. you know because. stag beetle.#and it worked with both deer and insect themes as separate AND joined themes which were then both incorporated into the#stag beetle deal which was also a separate thing#it has more layers and they just work
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"Violet would do it for us" "Yeah, she would.
"Louis would do it for us" "...I guess"
WHAT WAS THE REASON. WHY.
I think I know why.
So, yes—when we're trying to get James to help us, Clementine has to walk through the barn with his mask on. AJ's understandably anxious about this, and here's how these optional conversations can go:
Clementine: You know Violet would do it for us. AJ: Yeah... She would.
Clementine: Louis would do it for us. AJ: Yeah. I guess.
So... why? Why this small difference in the way AJ reacts? Or, even in the way Clementine phrases it?
I think it's easier for us who like Louis/clouis to look at this negatively, like "Well, what the hell? That seems unfair."
But, we gotta remember which route this appears in. AJ doesn't say this in Louis' route, he says it in Violet's route where Louis is captured.
In that route, we obviously spend less time with Louis. More importantly, he doesn't get to grow as much as a character. That's the nature of this game; you know less about the one you don't choose.
The player probably didn't go hunting with him, didn't appeal to him, didn't follow him, and definitely didn't save him... meaning the perception of him might not be the greatest depending on the player. Especially if that player is still pissed about his vote... and I think AJ might be echoing some of that doubt.
Violet in Louis' route, at the very least, earns some favor by voting to keep Clementine and AJ. Hence why Clementine is pretty confident that Violet would do this for them and why AJ agrees... even though through meta-knowledge we know that Violet despises Clementine for letting her get captured. So, we could argue that she wouldn't do it for them in that moment. It's all part of the irony that ep3 likes to play into... y'know, "Imagine how Violet will feel when she finds out you came to rescue her. You'll have given her hope again."
Oh, will she have hope again, Lee? Is that what she's going to feel when she sees Clementine again? Are you sure?
But, in Violet's route, Louis is shown to be apologetic but not to have stepped up. He doesn't get the chance to. Hence why Clementine states he'd do it for them without the "you know" and why AJ seems more doubtful.
And the thing is, anyone who knows anything about Louis knows that he would do it no matter the route... but he'd also complain about it, y'know?
Fine, he'll climb up and distract the walkers, but he's gonna make a half-hearted threat about eating first Clem and Violet if he dies. Fine, he'll rub walker guts all over himself, but he's gonna be grumpy about it. Fine, he'll carry the bomb when they infiltrate the boat, but he's gonna be anxious about it the entire time.
Like... sometimes, that's just how Louis is?
If it were him James handed that mask to and asked to walk among walkers, Louis would be like, "Fine, but only because Clem, AJ, and my friends are my reason for existing and without them, I'll die anyway... and because I'll look good in these walker skins."
On the other hand, Violet's more of a "just shut up and do it," kind of gal. You hand her the mask and she'll be like, "Ugh, fine. Let's get this over with."
So yeah, there's a purpose for the slight against Louis there. You don't know him unless you choose him, and if you don't, the game adjusts accordingly.
I also see this sentiment of "Why would AJ say that??" at the end of Louis' route where AJ has the option to question why Clementine's trusting him with an important task.
But, like... you don't have to pick that option. Y'know? I understand being annoyed that it's even there; I was annoyed, too... but, if you like Louis and you understand his arc, you're not going to have AJ say that. Because you know better. You didn't just hear the jokes and the piano. You're making sure AJ didn't stop listening, either.
In my opinion, that choice is there to test you.
So yeah, anon, I hope this reasoning helps.
#asks#twdg clementine#twdg louis#twdg violet#twdg clouis#twdg aj#this one's been in my inbox for a looooong time... sorry about that anon#but yeah this is one of those details that used to bother me so much sksksk#but taking a step back its like well yeah... it makes perfect sense why aj would respond like that#he probably doesn't think of louis as reliable or willing to do it for them because a. the vote even though they worked it out#b. louis got captured so aj doesn't see him step up as clem's second throughout the episode#c. aj is a child who is smart yes but he sees louis differently than clem or we do#this is also one of those little route comparisons that i like to look at like... how the one clem didn't romance/befriend and save#in interpreted by her. the player. and by the one she did romance/befriend and save#because violet's not view favorably by team louis for her behavior in ep3 and that ends up defining her#just as team violet will define louis by his vote in ep2 and that's just the limitation we're putting on ourselves#but then you play the game and see how devastated louis and vi are to have lost each other during the raid...
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😮💨 not my ass putting even more work into my Ymir analysis because I think I'm finally posting it to reddit. Like, my stronger leaning theories have changed a bit and I have to streamline it
#i have to post it#i cannot let The YouTube man put out something first#cause its so much of what ive come to exclusively because of people on Tumblr and y'all#we are right. we cant keep it to ourselves.
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Hey as a super introverted but not shy person I'd just like to say the jokes about extroverts "adopting" introverts to "get them out of their shell" are actually completely unfunny and it just goes to show how little respect a lot of y'all have for the fact that we genuinely don't want excessive social interaction and that y'all are forcing us to do something that brings us extreme physical and mental discomfort because you perceive our introversion as a failing rather than as purely a difference in personality.
We don't need your "help" to socialize. We're not children. We're simply not interested in spending every waking second of our lives talking to people and being talked at in return.
#again i scream from the rooftops that there is a monumental chasm between being shy and actually being an introvert#a shy person is someone who's afraid of social interaction. an extrovert can be naturally shy.#a shy person can WANT lots of social interaction but simply have not learned to feel comfortable in social situations.#people who are just very introverted simply have little desire or capacity for excessive human interaction.#we're not “afraid” of it. we just don't enjoy it and it wears us out.#you don't need to swoop in and save us because we can't handle ourselves. we're perfectly fine thank you#extroverts are constantly demanding that we get out of our comfort zones but few of you are willing to make the alternative more comfortabl#if you're a very extroverted person please do not take it upon yourself to jokingly “adopt” introverts you meet.#it's not funny and it's not helpful. it's irritating that you perceive our quietness and low social battery as something that needs “fixing#we won't miraculously learn to love and be comfortable with excessive human interaction. that's not how we're wired and that's OKAY#i'm honestly getting so sick of the “the lonely introvert and the extrovert who adopted them” memes#i can guarantee you that if you are an extrovert who operates this way then your introvert “friend” is actually probably very uncomfortable#and just don't want to say anything because they think it would be rude to bring up the fact that they don't want what you want from them#this does NOT mean extroverts and introverts cannot be friends nor am i saying all extroverts are annoying or that they all do this#i'm simply saying that if you are very extroverted and you have a friend who's very introverted#then it's on you to be aware of your introvert friend's limited social battery and STOP pressuring them to just “put up with it”#don't spend every second with them constantly talking. be willing to spend some time just in the quiet.#be willing to let them bow out of something if they're exhausted and are low on social energy.#don't expect them to want to come to every meeting or party or get-together because it WILL drain them completely.#be willing to let them spend time alone when they need to to recharge.#letting an introvert cool off and recharge when they need to is ALWAYS going to make social situations less stressful for them.#PLEAAAAASE take their feelings into account and understand that they do NOT perceive social interactions the way you do.#most very introverted people do not find socialization relaxing or invigorating. they don't do it to unwind#they have to unwind AFTER lots of social interaction#that's about it. thank you and good night
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personally, i don’t think anyone should be physically injuring themselves or not taking a single day off in three years in order to care for someone else, but apparently my family knows something i don’t!!!!!!
#the first one isn’t even this side of the family… 😭😭 everyone is like this#like. of course i can HELP… always down to help!#but i’m not comfortable with EVERYTHING being on me#because i’ve seen what that does to people and it’s… bad!#i just don’t get it… why would you put yourself in that position????#and why would you not plan ahead for something like this?#we just can’t reasonably expect to be able to do everything by ourselves#that’s not fair to us or to the people we’re caring for#i probably shouldn’t have but i called them out directly for seeing suffering as a form of love tonight#and they had NO idea what i was talking about#which is honestly hilarious#we are living on different planets#they both refuse to ask for ANY help unless they ABSOLUTELY have to and grind themselves into the ground for no reason#other than that doing everything themselves at any cost in order to not inconvenience the other person is how they show love#but nooooooo i’m just being craaaaaaazy…
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Hey!! I just wanted to say thanks for all your hard work <3<3
I had been a little down when it came to creating more content or being involved in Zukka side of the fandom but seeing your update reminded me to just have fun. And okay this is going to sound bad but I swear I mean this as a compliment; I thought I was wasting my time working for months and years on the stuff I made, but then I realized your fic series brings me so much joy and I'd never, ever judge you for the amount of effort you put into your writing. Seeing it's actually inspiring, to see that someone holds that much passion and creativity and you are sharing it all for FREE. That a person could take all this time to intricately weave together a story, create memorable OCs, breathe new life and make the ATLA world so much bigger than it ever was in canon.
So thanks for accidentally giving me a kick in the butt to stop being judgy about my own work and making me realize you and every fan creator is AWESOME.
I hope you have a wonderful day, your writing is a blessing.
awwww I wanted to say thank you for sending me this ask! I know it’s not easy to put yourself out there, even on anon, so I think it’s cool you felt confident enough to come here and tell me about how you’re feeling.
I don;t think what you’re saying is bad at all haha, because honestly, I feel the same way. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wondered why the fuck am I still doing this? What’s the point? Do people even still care? What if it’s not good enough? What if people discover I have no fucking idea what I’m doing? Why am i spending so much of my time and effort doing this?? I mean… the self doubt is super real, and shiiiiiit let me discover one person that feeds into my self doubt and I’m full on spiraling haha. (Be nice to creators damn it! we are doing our damn best lol)
I’m really glad you think my fic is awesome, and if it weren’t people like you reminding me, I probably would have given up a long time ago haha. I do give my fic a lot of effort, and I hope you continue to give your creations the same amount of love and effort! I’m sure you’re amazing, and seriously don’t give up! I care about your creations and if I don’t get to stop neither do you! WOHOOO!!
Thanks for the ask anon sorry it took me so long to answer
#I am the kind of person who is like AWWWW NO ASKS…#then I get an ask and I’m like YAY ASK!!!#& then I;m like OH NO HOW DO I ANSWER THIS ASK!?!?!?#but then if I don’t get an ask in a while I assume everyone hates me and then the cycle starts over again when I get another ask#but seriously anon DON’T STOP CREATING!!!!!#I wish the voices in our head weren’t constantly trying to discredit us#I also think the pressure we put on ourselves to be good enough is fucking dumb#like who cares if people like reblog comment kudo all that stuff#but ugh we all care so much#I love that you see all my passion and creativity in LIAB because I do put a lot of effort into that stupid fic#and yeah it stresses me out but when I see that it brings people joy and its worth it#& its not even that it’s stressful to write#I fucking love writing it#but yeah don’t think you’re alone with the ‘what’s the point’ thoughts#I’m sure we’ve all been there#at least I know I have been there#and kind of still am in there hahaha#thanks for this ask anon I hope I didn’t ramble too much#I hope you show me when you create something new! I’d love to see it#LIAB#ask
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i hate living with people who still have high school minds and don’t practice basic respect in sharing spaces with people cause they just have their friends over all the time who r loud asf and no one cleans up after themselves and most of their friends call me a bitch behind my back ig cause i don’t interact w ppl and also yea you’d have a resting bitch face too if ur the houses fucking maid and only actual adult who deals with every fucking thing whatever holy fuck man
#like idk call me a bitch whatever but i think I deserve basic respect in my own goddamn house in which i pay bills in. fuck off.#and yea I have a friend group we hang out but because we’re adults we clean up after ourselves and aren’t obnoxious immature cunts . btw !#also these ppl who call me a bitch either don’t know me or disrespected me in my own home and ‘meant to apologize but is too scared’#ok so u still come into my goddamn fucking house loud asf disrespectful asf messy asf but pretend im not a human being bc ur soooo scared#when u yelled at me and told me to chill and called me a bitch for setting a boundary where I was in the right . and u don’t want to#apologize cause now u suddenly don’t like confrontation… when ur in the wrong … hm!!!! i fucking hate you tai get out of my fucking house#my god#also if this sounds mean it’s because i put up with toooooooo much !!!!!!!!! children!!! im taking care of children against my will im only#22!!! im tired!! and depressed!!! I don’t need this !!!!!!
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this past year my work has started offering special seasonal round cakes. we don't order them to the store, the warehouse just sends out whatever the higherups think we need, which is of course always erring on the side of sending too many cakes, because it's better to have too much than to sell out
for most of the year this isn't that much of an issue. the pink cakes we sell at valentines and mother's day, and the rainbow and confetti cakes we get in the summer are popular sellers all year and they last 10 months in the freezer so there's no rush to get rid of them right away. for halloween and especially christmas this is a much bigger issue, since those colours are more distinctly holiday colours
christmas has been especially especially a big problem because christmas is such a huge sale time for grocery stores! we better send a lot of cakes! but like. who the fuck buys cake for christmas. if you're buying desserts for christmas you're getting cookies or dainty trays, or if you are getting a cake you're getting a yule log. nobody is buying just a christmas themed birthday cake. combine that with our new showcase where customers have to ask us to get the cakes out for them, and our higher-than-ever prices that customers are given ample time to think about while trying to get our attention, killing nearly all impulse buys, these cakes aren't moving. I'm pumping these cakes out as fast as I can but they just sit there for a week and expire. I think 15 total sales so far is a generous estimate, I think it's probably closer to 8.
but these boxes of cake keep showing up, and they're big boxes, and they're sending so many. we're running out of not just shelf space but floor space as well in the freezer, and everything is stacked to the ceiling
and the extra special thing is that we have two varieties of christmas cake. one is "merry berry", which is just vanilla cake with a mix berry filling. hardly seems that festive at all, but it'll be easy to sell after christmas. of course, that's not the one they keep sending. the one that keeps showing up is "holiday confetti" which is just a confetti cake but with only red and green sprinkles. okay that makes more sense, but a difficult sell after this next week and we have at least 15 boxes of them left in the freezer and each box has 12 cakes in it. I think we're going to have to lie and tell people it's just confetti cake and maybe they won't notice or care that it's missing most of the other colours
#idk why they don't do like a chocolate cake with a mint filling or something#seasonal but still something that'd sell after christmas#AND it'd be a chocolate cake too!#we hardly ever have chocolate cakes out anymore because they keep sending us all these seasonal vanilla cakes that we need to get rid of#we do actually offer mint chocolate as a regular product but we have to mix the filling and cut and fill the cakes ourselves#so of course it doesn't get made ever bc that's a lot of work#when you could just put out some of the hundreds of pre-assembled cakes they give us
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cant stop thinking abt that reply to bram's post abt the abusive cluster b parents so just know if u were abused like that, first of all, samesies and it gave me cluster b pds as a result, second of all, i promise no one whos calling for understanding of cluster b ppl is invalidating ur experiences. if u feel like they ARE, i sincerely hope u realise u dont have to have a medical explanation for why others suck. if ur parents sucked, u can just say that, and its freeing, and focusing on behavioural patterns instead of diagnoses (which u most likely dont have access to when it comes to strangers) will allow u to weed out actual bad ppl and keep urself safe(er)
#i understand its easy and comfortable to latch onto labels especially when it comes to parents#i did it#then i was diagnosed w the same shit#that was my turning point i think#when i realised we have the same shit and yet i am actively working very hard to be kind and compassionate#i dont go out of my way to be mean#at some point u have to realise that some ppl r just evil and mean spirited#and pds arent indicative of how self aware or kind or polite or compassionate someone is#i'd argue most of us put in SO much work to know ourselves and our potentially harmful behavioural patterns#way more than a neurotypical who never bothered to look inward for even a second#'these stereotypes dont come from nothing'#no shit! my dad called me both borderline and narcissist as insults AND I TURNED OUT TO HAVE BOTH#but let me tell u smth#most of my symptoms? are fucking survival mechanisms i learned as a child to avoid getting hurt. because thats what the brain does.#u know what else didnt come from thin air? sayings like hurt people hurt people#plus my victim complex allows me to write banger complaint letters now so theres that#look around u and be very comfortable w the fact that ur probably surrounded by a bunch of cluster b ppl that u adore#bc we're just ppl too#and ur doing urself a disservice trying to spot us#cluster b ppl can be evil ppl just as neurotypicals but they can also be ur friend who struggles w insecurities and is a huge ppl pleaser#bc they read the ableist posts too and they know everyone in the mainstream world thinks theyre evil#and when if u told them 'well my cluster b parents were abusive' in a less accusatory tone#maybe theyd look u in the eye w compassion and say 'yea i know how that feels and im here for u'
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"I know you keep saying you're doing stuff to help your mental health, and I know you try to track your moods and have a routine and stuff but you really need to try harder to not get so stressed about things" bestie when I say I'm trying to help my mental health, yeah I'm doing that stuff, but I'm also:
using DBT techniques to improve my emotional regulation, which takes a lot of energy because I have to focus on taking a step back and doing that while experiencing strong emotions that make that hard
actively unlearning unhealthy coping mechanisms and trying to replace them with healthier reactions to things, which once again requires catching myself doing stuff while experiencing strong emotions that make it harder to think rationally
working through shit like core beliefs to figure out why I act in certain ways and then challenge those beliefs to slowly fix things from the ground up (have you ever dug into core beliefs? it's a great way to end up sobbing for 2 hours straight while half your life suddenly clicks together and makes sense in a way it never had before)
basically improvising exposure therapy for various triggers because I don't have access to actual therapy so I've gotta DIY this shit if I actually want to get better at handling my triggers
having to work through processing years of trauma, abuse, etc, most of which gets brought up randomly and then I have to deal with it whether I'm in a good place to do that or not
and a whole bunch of other exhausting shit I can't remember off the top of my head because I'm brain foggy and have a migraine right now
and I'm having to do all this on top of repeatedly getting so ill I can't keep up with basic chores and experience the kind of symptoms and pain levels people would normally go to the hospital for on a daily basis and just having to try and carry on as normal anyway because I have no other choice, not to mention all the various stressors piling up in the background that I'm having to process and deal with.
"you need to try harder to not get stressed about things" says the person who won't even begin working on their own deeply unhealthy behaviours that negatively effect everyone around them because "that's a lot of work and I don't want to have to do all that"
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#posts made on pain meds#had a deeply infuriating conversation earlier and this comment was just one little thing in the middle of that shitshow#but it has really driven home the point that people don't realise that when I say we're doing a lot to manage our mental health#I mean we're having to teach ourselves healthy coping mechanisms and emotional regulation#while in an amount of pain that would have a lot of people in the ER screaming that the staff because they can't regulate shit in that stat#and then also being thrown straight into intensely triggering and stressful situations that we can't get out of and just have to deal with#like yeah actually I've seen how ''normal'' people react to the pain of a dislocated rib#and I know that on a daily basis for the last month I've been in significantly more pain that I get from dislocated ribs#quite frankly it would be perfectly understandable if I just laid on the floor and screamed for several hours a day#but instead I'm criticised if I can't regulate my emotions to the same level as a mentally healthy person who isn't in pain#regardless of how much effort I'm actually putting in#and the fact that it's basically impossible to regulate your emotions properly when you're in this much pain#the fact that I'm still using DBT techniques and taking a step back to figure out how to handle emotions in a healthy way#is quite frankly a fucking miracle but it's still gonna get treated like I'm doing the bare minimum
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ok this is unprompted but if you pride yourself on being the reason people leave a space for something they genuinely love and have done no objective wrong - youre a piece of shit btw. like full send youre horrible.
#cheeri rants#this is brought on by me finally letting myself get back into smth i loved for like 5-6 years#and got squicked out of by senseless witch hunts and trans/misogyny and the like#im really sitting here remembering all the nights i stayed up with amazing friends#the shoulders i cried on and the hands i held for others#the people who stood with me through some of the toughest times i can remember#we all loved the same silly things#we all poured bits of ourselves into everything we created and we shared that with everyone#i still so vividly remember lamenting that id never get to see our interest irl#and someone i didnt even know all that well dm’d me a few days later asking if i had venmo or paypal#because they were going to give me $50 to buy a ticket. they wanted to go but couldnt#for some reason i cant remember but they gave me their own money and told me to please enjoy in their place#and you know what? i fucking cried that night. you dont see that anymore#the all-nighters i pulled with my best friend watching the live reruns of our interest before we even got into the fandom#doing my homework while we were on facetime together squealing#and all of this came to a screeching halt because of some . PEOPLE.#who figured we were having fun the wrong way because they didnt like it#and we put up all the flashing neon signs to warn people#warn them of smth they should have already known#and just because people ignored those signs it was taken out on us anyway#and i have never been so heartbroken to watch one by one as some of the brightest people i ever knew#started leaving. breaking down. their light was being stomped out because some assholes cant mind their own#and i will be fucking damned before i stand by and let that happen again. to anyone.
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I don't wanna go to wooooooorkkkk I wanna stay home and write a manifesto on how capitalism has genuinely rewired the human brain to be desensitized to others suffering and how society finds constant pain and stress as a normal part of life, as if it isnt a direct cause of the constant affirmation that we aren't enough if we around breaking ourselves for a system with no sympathy for us.
#and also how destroyug ourselves for a company is consideted ok but putting others in your community before yourself isnt#and also how were all taught to be selfish and ignorant to others problems because we should focus on making the world fit us as individuals#instead of BUILDING a work that accomodates us all and allows for the social aspect of being human#care and protection and loylty to one anothers safety and happiness#being human isnt about having the most complex bra ik n and being able to create currency#its about using our complex brain to help ine another out#to evolve all together#how are we devolvibg back into indovidualism
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My final thoughts about the reporter:
I think it’s crazy to just pass judgment on that situation without looking at the context. I can understand why, but going so far as to read into what someone’s saying and suggesting that they believe their struggle (which, mind you, is also a genocide) is more important due to some inherent “Arab antiblackness”… Without any attempt to directly reach out for clarification. As they’re pointing out aid that should have gone to your country…
I’m going to trust the Sudanese woman who repeated the reporter’s words verbatim and explained exactly what he said. To me that’s a much better contextualization than “sksksk me and the girlies think what he said was super racist, he thinks his struggle is more important than ours, if you know you know!”
Especially given that he stands to materially gain… what, exactly, from the alleged antiblack sentiment? What does he stand to gain from demeaning the tragedy of another group of people in favor of his own? The answer is not hardly clear enough for me to levy that judgment against him, I’m sorry. Especially without at least trying to have a conversation about it first.
A lot of us are going to have to work harder to contextualize both what we see and what people are saying about what we see. It’s uncomfortable, but it’s necessary. We need to be able to think for ourselves. And we don’t have to agree on everything, nor will we. But being able to have these conversations (both among ourselves as to whether something really is antiblackness and with the people who we feel have hurt us) is necessary. If we can’t ask one another, “Do we really think this is the case? Is this indeed what’s going on?” then we’re just setting ourselves up for critical judgment errors in the future.
#at this point though: any request to bring up “discourse” is a red flag#to what material end are we having this discourse?#and if we’re talking about something someone has done that we don’t like…#why not just address them personally and see if those feelings can’t get sorted out?#we owe ourselves and our allies a chance at conversation#hopefully that makes sense#if you’ve seen the video and you feel like he says something egregious after considering his words… so be it!#at least you gave it thought#I think I’m just wary of “take my word for it” when you’re actively putting words in someone’s mouth#especially given the way AI images and videos are poised to skew any “reality” we see on here#especially since not everyone is who they say they are online#i feel like I needed to say something about this before moving on#because it’s important and it underlines how we should be thinking moving forward
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How would you recommend someone who's been here awhile as a whump blogger get more... engagement? I will post ask games and get virtually no ask or such. :( when I first started I had crazy engagement but now it's just gone. Makes me feel a little bad like I did something wrong? Aaa I'm sorry xx
Ahahaa anon this is an interesting ask to get at an interesting time. I’m going to do my best to help and give advice with what I’ve been wanting to try out as this is something that I have been thinking about a lot lately as well. I’m going to put this below a cut as I often feel. Weird talking about things regarding engagement and I understand some people don’t like those conversations but y know it is what it is
Let me start off with, I’m sure you didn’t do anything wrong friend! I have noticed engagement has gone down a lot lately, not just in myself but in blogs that I follow that were VERY active and got lots of engagement back when they first started posting, and while they’re still very active and absolutely fantastic and talented writers, they still aren’t getting the attention they used to. I want to add a quick disclaimer that I understand engagement and attention is not everything, that we are supposed to create for ourselves, we are not simply content machines here to please an audience but also. When you go from having constant engagement with your work to what feels like none, it does feel a little discouraging, if not a lot discouraging and leave you wondering what changed. I think that’s normal. While we should create with ourselves in mind, it’s also just human nature to want to connect and interact with others who also enjoy our creations!
Onto the next thing, I have a few theories as to why engagement in general may have gone down. Obviously, I don’t know who you are or what your specific situation is so these may not apply! But they are things I think about when I think about this
Personally, I joined as a whump blog in 2019 and gained a bit of a following RIGHT before Covid lockdowns. Around this time a lot of people were home, a lot of people had way more time to write, to read, to interact with each other, I recall this time as being very active for everybody, between the Whump community online and whump discord servers, nobody had anywhere to go or anything else to do so we were all online indulging in what may have been a new hobby and new and exciting space for some people.
Following that, Covid lockdowns ended. People went back to work, back to school, and suddenly a lot of us just. Can’t be as active as we used to. This community seems to be full of neurodivergent people, I imagine a lot of us are struggling to balance school/work, household responsibilities, and our hobbies and things like writing or keeping up with our favorite series may fall to the side unfortunately. People graduated high school, started college, started jobs, these will take up a lot of time so I’m not really surprised to see a decrease in general activity.
So just like those things mean a lot less people are likely to be active as much as they used to, it may also mean you aren’t as active as you used to be. Again, I don’t know your situation personally, but I went back to work in February of 2021 and since then I have written. Less and less. It’s actually kind of depressing when I see time stamps on things and realize how little I wrote at all in 2022 because work was such a drain on me and even now, I struggle to have the time, energy, and inspiration all at the same time to write when I have other things that need to be done as well. My own engagement has gone down significantly since when I first started, so I understand exactly what your talking about, I post about my oc’s constantly but I struggle to really write and it’s very rare to get asks about them the way that I used to (that’s not to say it never happens and I love seeing the ones I do get in my inbox but I have noticed a change that I don’t think is exactly significant to just myself)
(Split this up cuz it was too long for one lmao) I mostly assume it’s due to less people being active as per the reasons mentioned above, there are names I used to see often that have since disappeared and I think about often, but also I know it’s partly on me because I just. Don’t write as much as I used to. People engaged when I had writing for them to engage with. I don’t have that very often any more so they don’t have anything to work with. That’s understandable. I often find myself getting in a mood where I’ve convinced myself everyone has lost interest and if I’m being completely honest that poll I posted was to see if something I was wondering about was correct because I have always noticed a slight uptick in asks or requests regarding one OC but unfortunately I still write primarily for myself and that one OC just. Isn’t the one I want to focus on all the time and I worried I was failing a lot of people by focusing on what I liked.
Anyways that’s all to say. I understand what you mean and this has also been on my mind a lot lately. But I’ve also been thinking about what to do about it.
For one thing, for the same reasons I don’t write as much as I used to, I also don’t read as much as I used to, I miss connecting with other people over THEIR work as well. That doesn’t always mean they’ll be into my stuff, they don’t have to be! I love that they’re creating at all and I want to enjoy it and engage with them over their creations as well! Of course I understand we shouldn’t be interacting just in the hopes it’ll draw attention to ourselves, but it’s also the natural outcome of things. If we aren’t able to reach out to others, they likely won’t reach out to us or look into what we’re doing. There’s quite a few of us, it’s easy to miss some really awesome blogs and really awesome work just because we end up in our own little circles.
Posting your writing or art or whatever it may be regularly, especially being sure to put it in the Whump community tags allows for more people to keep up with it or new people to find and support you and potentially garner new interest if you feel like people have lost interest in what you make. Personally, my goal with doing whumptober is to start writing and posting somewhat regularly again, in a way that more and new people may see it. This is also something I need to fix up but having a good master list is great for people who are new and want to catch up!
And not to sound like hopelessly optimistic but like. Don’t give up. And focus on creating with yourself in mind. You didn’t do something wrong, things have just changed, I forgot to mention this above as it just came to me but I remembered tumblr started doing that thing where you need an account to send anon asks which will have axed a lot of people who were lurking without an account and didn’t want to make one. I know it feels disheartening and discouraging because we want people to enjoy our work but the only way to get that is to keep working. Your work still has value even if people aren’t engaging the way they used to and I’m sure that it’s great! The people who love it the same as you do will find it I’m sure, and I’m wishing you the best of luck!
#I’m sorry anon I hope that this can be of some assistance#I think there are some things we can do to help the situation and other things are just kind of#how things are given everything going on y know#I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong and I know this can be very disheartening#I’ve talked about it on my other blog some but I often worry people have just. completely lost interest#but then I’m like. no. those people are still here. and /I/ haven’t lost interest. so even if everyone is sick of me#I will continue posting because it makes me happy#do what makes you happy friend and I know we can’t control others actions#but I think the people who share our interests will find us#if we put ourselves out there enough#anonymous
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