#because there's a *small* chance that they could grow and *if* they grow
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Hey so just to add context for the lice thing, bc the tl;dr is that there's more nuance and classism is also a factor
Schools were already doing this well before the pandemic. My younger sister got lice in the spring of 2017 and our local small town high school still had her attend every day while she was treating it, as according to my mom (who's the local teacher's union rep) the school district had recently changed their policy to the above. This was a bit surprising, especially since the district had also recently established a rule that anyone sent home sick couldn't come back to school until they'd had a full 24 hours with no more symptoms. So why would lice be an exception?
Because they found that of all the documented lice cases each year, the vast majority of them would come from the same kids and the same households each time. Which meant those same kids were missing a LOT of school.
I can confirm this from personal experience. Growing up there was a kid in all my elementary and middle school classes, let's call him Aaron. This kid would get lice CONSTANTLY. Like once a month the school nurse would find it, send him home, and then he wouldn't be allowed back until the lice was gone. So after a week he'd be back with a shaved head and all lice supposedly gone, only to have it show back up a few weeks later. Now we rode the same bus, so I saw Aaron's house and could tell that it was....really not in good condition. Point being, I wasn't surprised in the least that there was a recurrent lice infestation that his folks couldn't afford to completely exterminate—that, or they just didn't care. But because of this, Aaron probably missed a combined half-semester of every school year. And yet he still got pushed through to the next grade level year after year, because the school district didn't want to lose funding by holding him back, as alluded to above.
Aaron moved to a different town in middle school and I lost touch with him, so I don't know how he's doing now or how long the lice cycle continued. But I do know that he couldn't have been the only one in this situation, not when like a third of the town I grew up in is at or below the poverty line.
So is needing funding for the school district to blame? Partly, yes. But it's not about the short term of putting more bodies in seats from day to day. It's about how many low income kids they're failing to educate by punishing them for a living situation that the kids can't control. And while I don't necessarily like that lice has a chance to spread in schools more easily now, I can at least respect that it's better than the alternative of denying kids the education they deserve.
CDC voice: "I know I said we'd do something about covid if it got very high again, but we have real tough jobs to do, like removing the recommendations that children with head lice or watery diarrhea be sent home to prevent further spread of their illness."
#lice#head lice#classism#public schools#important#plus like afaik the admins do make a kid disclose if they have lice so the teachers can socially distance them from the other students#and as long as kids know not to share hats or anything then the chances of it spreading are pretty low
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Primarchs + Daughters
My perception of how each Primarch would behave when nosediving into parenthood if they had daughters. Enjoy!
I wanna personally thank @moodymisty because a great deal of their works inspired this piece.
Part 1
Lion El’jonson
The embodiment of 'tough love' made man. Having a daughter doesn’t do much to soften this guy… or at least that’s what others believe. The Dark Angels Legion are probably the only ones aware of the small gestures the Primarch often gives to his little girl in the safety that privacy offers. Where Lion lacks words of compassionate and parental love, he appropriately makes up for it with actions. He isn’t one to go over the top and prefers to give modest gifts to his daughter as the last thing the man wants is to raise a spoiled brat. Father-daughter bonding time can be summarized with strenuous training using the sword. This man will not let his precious Princess go through life without learning how to protect herself, even if he has made an oath to forever shield her too.
Fulgrim
The complete antithesis of Lion. Where this man views the Emperor as the perfection anyone should strive to reach, his beautiful daughter comes close to the second place in fulfilling that ideal. There’s a big fat chance that he teared up a little when his little gem called him Papa for the first time, but managed to wear his ever unshakable mask because he absolutely refuses to break character even in private. Has the mistaken notion that his baby is a blank canvas ready to be painted to its fullest potential; aka, molding her to what HE wants and expects of her. Fulgrim probably spoils her rotten but only through conditions that she must follow, as the Primarch understands the importance of fighting and earning for what you wish to obtain. He makes sure that any of his gene-sons are in her company as he refuses to let even a single scratch happen to his little girl. Honestly, a grown-up version of Fulgrim’s child has the chances to go both opposites of the spectrum with no in betweens: A shy aristocratic lady who is unable to speak her own mind or a completely haughty, sharp and manipulative noble woman. Too much to unpack there, yo.
Perturabo
(Slaps this bastard's head loudly) This bad boy can fit so much family trauma in it! Okay no but seriously, there’s a good reason why so many people agree that this bitch has a thing for gilded cages and all the fucked up poetry that comes with it. The good ol’ classic Greek tragedy of Medea. Perturabo may have big and insane expectations for his gene-sons but when it comes to having a daughter? The apple of his eyes. The sunshine of his life. For this Primarch, his little princess is the only living thing in the entire universe that loves him genuinely and unconditionally, making his love the equivalent of a child crushing a bird between his hands. While still easy to anger and with a resting-bitch face, he is incredibly tame and careful with his girl; always making sure that she is well versed in all kinds of science and engineering that could easily label her as a genius (but we all know how stressful can be to try and live up to big expectations). Most of his Legion finds the child either an annoyance or don’t even care enough beyond the factual point of her being the child of their mighty Primarch, beyond that? This poor girl is probably the loneliest child to ever grace the world. Remember that I referred to this like the Tragedy of Medea? Yeah…
Jaghatai Khan
Probably one of the few best papa-tier out there. This man will see his little daughter and think the only thing a good parent should do: To love and guide. He’ll be not afraid to say “I love you” to his baby girl no matter where they are, but he’ll know when to be stern and wise so she grows to be a fine and humble woman. Honestly, this guy would learn how to make a sling just for the single purpose of having his precious princess close while also being excited to teach her how to ride on a horse like he did in his childhood. The thing that makes this dude the best in this list is that if his daughter ever expresses to follow a different path in life like becoming a remembrancer or anything that doesn’t involve the Imperium, this Chad of a man will look deep into her eyes and tell her that he’ll support her no matter what. The only thing he asks is that she stays in contact as he’ll miss her terribly. Kudos to him, fr.
Leman Russ
Another one for the ‘tough love’ guys list, yo! On his defense! Hear me out… in his defense, this guy was literally raised first by Fenrisian wolves before even knowing what a proper bath entailed, so of course he’ll sometimes be a bit too much on his poor little baby girl. Roughhousing was his best first approach to teach her how to fight, trying to make his little pup have some proper backbone worthy of being called the child of a Primarch. Sometimes he’ll get carried away (either with words or actions) and is in those moments when Leman would learn what genuine and heavy guilt feels like; a very alien emotion for someone as brutal and fierce as he is. There’s no worse feeling than knowing that you are the reason behind your daughter’s tears. No one would ever say it out loud, but the way this giant of a man apologizes is by slowly and silently hugging his little girl while pouting until she hugs him back. He may suck at expressing verbally his love towards his baby, but actions are his best way to communicate and this is something his daughter eventually learns and accepts from him. Forgot to add that the entire Space Wolves Legion are not only suffocatingly protective of their Primarch’s child, but everyone takes turns when she asks them for piggy-rides or let her braid their hair.
Rogal Dorn
I don’t wanna be too mean to this poor man but lord have some mercy, trying to squeeze any emotion that doesn’t range to watching paint dry from this damn guy is already a miracle on its own. He’s probably the kind of dude that’ll leave his poor daughter in the care of his astartes and serfs while he works. Workaholic in bold, yo. It literally will take watching his poor little princess cry her eyes out for him to attempt some bonding time but man he just sucks at trying not to have a stick up his ass (Again, I’m not trying to be mean but god this is painful). This is the kind of man, besides Guilliman, that will search high and low for some paternity books to help him. At the end this father-daughter relationship can be salvageable by having a heart to heart between them both and even then, is the poor girl the one that gives more than she receives. Honestly, any daughter from Dorn has the patience of a saint. Besides this Primarch's ineptitude to properly communicate his feelings, everything else doesn’t change the fact that he loves his little princess and will do anything to make her as happy as possible so he gets some brownie points for the try.
I'll later write the second and third part of this, I swear <333
#warhammer 40k#warhammer 40000#wh40k#primarchs#lion el'jonson#fulgrim#perturabo#jaghatai khan#leman russ#rogal dorn#fatherhood#very very slightly implied primarch x reader#if you squint#implied child negligence#implied yandere perturabo
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…i was so miserable? l. hc smau
26. different (written) wc: 1515
Haechan, as usual, came to the studio first and very early. In fact, he didn't want to come today at all, because he needed to tell you what he knows, otherwise Renjun would do it, and then things would get even worse. But the main reason he didn’t want to come and see you was fear. He was scared and shy to look you in the eyes after finding out you had feelings for him. Of course, he had feelings for you too—very strong ones—but for some reason, your mutual feelings frightened him yesterday. He had been so sure that you would never like him in that way and that he would never have a chance with you. He was prepared for rejection and had accepted that you would never be together. But yesterday, you proved him wrong, and now his head was spinning with emotions. He was overwhelmed and nervous.
Every training session with you had been fun and comfortable, which surprised you. Falling for Haechan after just seven practices wasn’t something you expected. But he truly was special. Haechan was always kind to you. Even when you made mistakes, he never got upset but patiently helped and supported you. He took charge of everything, you could say that he was the leader in your duo and a very caring leader.
Haechan was different. He wasn’t like your ex.
After your breakup with Chanhyun, you were convinced that you didn’t deserve love and that you would never find someone who could truly be a good partner. He never listened to you and pretended that nothing was going on with you and that you didn't have any problems. Chanhyun never cared about you, ignored your feelings as if they didn’t exist. He saw your diaries and notes in secret and hid about it until one day you saw your diary out of place. It broke your heart that even though he saw everything, he didn't try to talk to you. Even when you tried to talk to him and show him how much you were struggling, he remained indifferent.
Haechan was different.
After that experience, you closed yourself off, even from close friends, and only shared your thoughts and feelings online, where no one knew you. You kept telling everyone you were fine, and most people believed you. But not Renjun. Renjun always knew you better than you realized. He saw how unhappy you were with Changhyun and tried to warn you, but you didn’t listen. After your heart was broken, he was the one who stayed by your side. He saw your tears and the depression you sank into. That’s why Renjun became like an older brother to you, protecting, caring for you and didn't let suspicious guys near you. You didn’t mind. At that point, love wasn’t important to you anymore.
You left the café, holding two cheesecakes and a coffee, feeling happy. Today, you and Haechan were finally going to finish your choreography, and you couldn’t wait to show it to your team.
When you entered the studio, you heard familiar music. “Ateez?”
Haechan was sitting on the couch with his phone in hand. Hearing the door open, he looked up. “Oh, Y/N!” “Hi!” you smiled, sitting next to him and placing the cheesecakes and coffee on the small table. “I got one with strawberry and one with chocolate. I hope you’ll like them. This café always has the best cheesecakes!” you said with a sweet smile.
Haechan froze, staring at you. You were so beautiful in that moment, and he felt his love for you grow even stronger. Wait. Love? Did he love you?
“I’m sure they’re the best cheesecakes,” he replied warmly.
You stood up to go change, but suddenly paused as you listened to the music. “Wait, Ateez? Why are you playing them?” “They just had a comeback, so I decided to listen. Plus, you like them.”
You nodded, heading towards the changing room, but a thought crossed your mind: How does he know I like Ateez?
You stopped in the doorway. “Donghyuck?” “Yeah?” “How do you know I like them?”
The air in the room felt heavy. You weren’t smiling anymore, and Haechan noticed, becoming slightly anxious. “You told me! I remember you mentioned them once, so I remembered!” he said, trying to sound confident. “Oh, really?” you replied awkwardly,already believing in his words, but then he added: “I even remember that your bias is Yunho.”
What?
“Yunho?” “Yeah, you like him a lot, don’t you?” “I never said Yunho was my bias.” “You did.” “No.” “Yes, Y/N, you…” “No. My bias is Seonghwa, not Yunho. And, by the way, I’ve never even mentioned Seonghwa before. Yet you’re claiming I talked about Yunho.”
Why was Haechan so sure about this? What made him think that? How did he even know you liked Ateez? Did you ever tell him?
You froze. “Y/N, are you okay?”
Haechan’s behavior was suspicious. You started recalling all the moments when he unexpectedly showed up when you needed something. You thought he was just attentive, but no, that didn’t seem to be the case.
You remembered how he suddenly gave you chocolates. How he comforted you when you were anxious. How he unexpectedly suggested going for a walk. How someone "randomly" transferred you money when you needed it. How you suddenly started hearing Ateez songs and that your bias is Yunho. And finally, you noticed how Haechan’s attitude toward you had changed. He became more cautious and caring. If he used to joke around and tease you often, now he was entirely different.
Haechan had changed. Haechan knew.
“Do you know about my Twitter?” you asked sharply, looking at him.
Haechan froze, panic spreading across his face. “T-Twitter? Of course, I know. Everyone knows. You know mine too, right?” He let out an awkward laugh, trying to play it off.
“My private account.”
From his reaction, you realized everything. He knew about your Twitter. He knew all your thoughts and struggles.
Haechan swallowed hard and stood up, looking you in the eye. “Y/N, I...”
“You know about my account, Haechan.”
Haechan froze. You never called him Haechan; you were the only one who always used his real name. Hearing his nickname from you in such a cold tone hurt him deeply. “No, no... I’m Donghyuck, not Haechan,” he stammered.
“And here I thought you were just attentive, but instead, you stayed silent and kept it all to yourself?” Your eyes welled up with tears as you stepped away from him.
Haechan panicked and stepped closer, trying to take your hands in his. “Y/N, let me explain everything... It was an accident...”
“God, Renjun was right...” You stepped even further away and lowered your head. Haechan saw tears streaming down your face.
“Y/N, Y/N, I didn’t mean to. I came across it accidentally, please hear me out.”
“You seriously read everything about me, and...” You raised your head, and Haechan froze. “How am I supposed to dance that choreo with you after this?”
Haechan’s heart shattered. “Please, Y/N, hear me out. I didn’t find out that long ago. I wanted to tell you, but I was scared. I was afraid you’d shut me out. We were never that close, and I thought this was a good way to understand you better. I genuinely wanted to help you.”
“You wanted to know me without asking me directly? You know, maybe it’s my fault for not locking my account. It’s not your fault—it’s mine,” you said bitterly.
“No, Y/N, you’re not to blame. Please, don’t say that.”
“Haechan, I just don’t know how to talk to you now, knowing that you know everything about me. Knowing I..." "...I was so miserable?"
“Y/N, don’t say that. Please. You’re not awful. There’s nothing wrong with this.”
“It hurts to know that you now know my worst secrets, but I don’t know anything about you except the image you show to others.”
Haechan stood there, stunned. He watched you breathe rapidly, and he himself was on the verge of tears. “That’s not true! You know a lot about me already, and if you want, I can open up to you even more.”
“So you know that I have feelings for you,” you interrupted, recalling your tweet.
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry, but I want to go home. I can’t dance,” you said as you started gathering your things.
“Y/N, please don’t shut me out. We need to talk...”
You stayed silent.
“Do you want me to tell Jeno that we can’t show our dance? I’ll tell him it’s my fault. I won’t mention you.”
You still said nothing, a lump in your throat stopping you from speaking. Haechan wanted to hug you but feared crossing another line.
“I...” you stammered. “Tell him whatever you want,” you said and walked out of the studio.
Haechan wanted to run after you. He didn’t want to leave you in such a state, knowing he had caused it. But he stayed frozen, staring at the door, tears welling up in his eyes.
Was Haechan different?
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prev / masterlist / next
note: I put my soul here. It was so funny to me when you all thought that renjun was jealous and in love with her😭 renjun is my favourite here btw
taglist (open) : @alethea-moon @dinonuguaegi @jenoleeaesthetic @gukuwii @doughyk @elsbunny @dudekiss3r @yuthabitz @thegracerammy @soobinbunnie5 @joyzluvr @yewshi @miniature-tragedy @jaymelee @foxy-kitsune @slayhaechan @chibilino @sleepyvic @minkyuncutie @olladecaramelos @samvagejkflxhrt @gomdoleemyson @nctjunie @ypoom151999
#i was so miserable?#haechan fluff#haechan angst#haechan smau#nct smau#nct reactions#haechan x reader#nct haechan#nct x reader#haechan imagines#haechan texts#haechan scenarios#haechan smut#haechan#haechan social media au#haechan suggestive#nct imagine#nct 127#nct dream texts#nct fic#nct imagines#nct texts#nct dream#nct social media au#nct dream angst#nct angst
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Heyy!! first of all your writing is SO GOOD i have come across an amazing writer such as yourself in a long long time. I was wondering if you could write something for remus lupin with the promt 44 in the list? probably like co-workers to lovers kind of a thing. i love him sm i wish he were real ( not that i'd have a chance but still ). THANK YOU SM <33 LOTS OF LOVE
STOP IT, you're making me blush!! You’re so sweet, and I appreciate you taking the time to tell me that—you’ve officially made my day!!
ivy's 1k celebration ❄️ navigation ❄️ prompt list
ˋ°•*⁀➷ REMUS LUPIN #44: "Tell me three reasons why I should put up with you." "Well, for starters, I'm cute."
You leaned against the staffroom door, your eyes locked on the brooding figure hunched over a pile of essays. The quill in Remus Lupin’s hand moved furiously, his brows furrowed in concentration. Honestly, he looked a bit like a kicked puppy—a really cute, endearingly grumpy puppy.
"Oi, Lupin." You sauntered in, plopping into the chair opposite him. "You look like you’re grading the downfall of humanity, not essays."
Without looking up, he muttered, "If you'd read this one, you’d think the same."
You laughed, the sound bright in the dull, parchment-scented room. "Careful, Professor Lupin, your grumpiness is showing."
Remus sighed, finally meeting your gaze, his tired eyes tinged with exasperation. "Some of us take our work seriously."
"And some of us," you shot back with a smirk, "know how to have fun while doing it. You should try it sometime—fun, I mean. It’s delightful."
His lips twitched, almost forming a smile, but he caught himself. "Why are you here, anyway? I thought you were done for the day."
"I was," you said, leaning forward conspiratorially, "but I heard you were holed up here, looking like a medieval monk. Thought I’d check on you."
"How thoughtful," he deadpanned, though the faintest blush dusted his cheeks.
You grinned, knowing you were getting to him. "You’re welcome. Now, I demand your attention for at least five minutes."
"Why?" he asked, tilting his head and raising a brow.
"Because I’m adorable," you quipped, twirling a strand of hair.
"Debatable," he shot back, though his cheeks flushed pinker.
"Rude," you gasped, clutching your chest like he'd just insulted your honor. "You wound me, Lupin."
His lips curved into the tiniest smile, and you knew you had him.
"Fine," he said, sitting back and crossing his arms. "You want my attention? Tell me three reasons why I should put up with you."
You leaned forward, resting your chin on your hand, your smirk growing. "Well, for starters, I’m cute."
"Debatable," he repeated, but his voice was softer, teasing.
"And second," you continued, ignoring him, "I make your dull, miserable days brighter with my sparkling wit and charm."
His eyes rolled, but you caught the corner of his mouth twitching.
"And third," you finished with a dramatic sigh, "you secretly like me and would miss me terribly if I stopped bothering you."
For a moment, he said nothing, his eyes studying you like you were one of his more perplexing students. You felt your pulse quicken, the usual banter hanging in the air like a question left unanswered.
Then he smiled—small and shy, but genuine—and looked down at the essays in front of him.
"You’re insufferable," he said, but there was no heat behind it.
"You’re blushing, Lupin," you teased, your grin widening.
"I’m not," he mumbled, his ears now undeniably red.
"Oh, you are. I win."
"Win what?" he asked, glancing up at you again.
"Whatever this is," you said, motioning between the two of you.
"Well," he said softly, "if this is winning, I think I’m alright with losing."
Your heart skipped a beat, his words sinking in. Was Remus Lupin—grumpy, shy, always-buried-in-books Remus Lupin—flirting with you?
"Careful, Lupin," you said, leaning back in your chair, though your voice was softer now. "You keep talking like that, and I might start to think you like me."
He chuckled, the sound low and warm, and for the first time, he didn’t deny it.
#ivy's soft scribbles ೀ#ivy's 1k celebration ✧₊⁺#frost bite ❄️#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin
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“Yep, all sisters. I’m only a few years older then them, so I got to grow up and try to be a good older brother. Though my sisters are more of the rough and tumble type, it was fun but nowadays I don’t see them too often and it’s not just because of this job. Since one works in a theatre and the other is a lawyer.” He thinks fondly of his sisters, as he’s glad to not really talk about his parents.
At the next question Curly deflates slightly and he hesitates to continue speaking. “It was something.”
[Roll - 18] He might as well continue, it’s not like he can’t trust Pumpkin. “It was a big change, my parents wanted me to get out of Australia as it’s quite small compared to a few other places. So if I went to a high school in a different country it could lead to a better chance in a college in the same country and to eventually a job that lead to making a lot of money.”
“I don’t fault my parents for doing it, since I got to see the world a bit and meet a lot of new people!” He offers a nervous smile.
Restless as he is, Curly wanders aimlessly and sketches a rough diagram of the halls, pausing now and then to answer messages as he goes -- it's when the tablet's battery gets low that he decides to follow the map to backtrack to his room and take a break from wandering.
Except...when he opens the door, there's no familiar paperback on the desk, and the one person in room -- changing clothes, no less -- is definitely not Jim.
This isn't his quarters, clearly, which means...
He blinks at his double before averting his eyes, suddenly embarrassed. "Shit, sorry, I- I didn't mean to intrude, I got turned around."
Well. He'd meant to find his double to ask about the matter of nicknames and color-coding the crews, anyway. Not to mention discussing the uranium situation. He might as well stay for a moment. "...I did have a couple of things to ask about the next time I saw you, though. Do you mind if we talk? I, uh. I can wait outside for a minute, if you'd rather."
( @curlygrant44 )
At seeing his door suddenly opened by his double while he was getting changed does cause a small deer-in-headlights type effect before he blinks and quickly putting his shirt on properly.
"No worries, it happens with the state of the ship." He says as he moves to tidy up the room slightly as he didn't really expect anyone to ever enter the room besides himself.
"But you are quite welcome to come in. Don't mind the small mess? What do you want to talk about since I'm all ears." He offers a small smile before offering his bed to sit on.
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Because the weather is absolute garbage (well below freezing temperatures and snowing) and I'm feeling kinda unmotivated atm here's a small teaser for the next chapter of All Of You, All Of Me (Intertwined) - my bucktommy mpreg fic
The next morning Tommy walked to the coffee shop and arrived early, only to find Evan had also just arrived. “Hey.” He said as he approached Evan.
“Hey, why don’t I grab us drinks while you find us a table?” Evan suggested.
“Sure.” Tommy agreed.
“What do you want? Not that I forgot your usual order but you probably can’t have your usual because the caffeine…” Evan frowned. “Not that I’m trying to police what you eat or drink!” He added quickly.
Tommy had to chuckle a bit at how nervous Evan was. For a moment it could almost be Evan’s regular old nervous excitement and not the new much more complex nervousness that Tommy had instilled in Evan yesterday with just just five words. “You’re fine. Get me a decaf mocha with raspberry syrup-” Tommy could see Evan’s face twisting into one of confusion or perhaps disgust. “It’s what she wants. I’m not exactly a fan but it does taste good.” Tommy explained, gesturing vaguely at his stomach.
“Got it. Coming right up.” Evan nodded and went to order.
Tommy got them a table in a quiet corner of the coffee shop and waited patiently for Evan, who soon came over to the table with their drinks in hand.
“Have you uh, have you had a lot of cravings?” Evan asked as he set Tommy’s drink in front of him, then sat across from Tommy.
“Yeah. This drink is one of two consistent repeat offenders and there’s been lots of one time cravings for different things too.” Tommy nodded. Tommy knew they should be talking about more important things but Evan was nervous and it was probably less nerve-wracking for him if they eased into it, and maybe it’d be easier for Tommy too.
“What’s the other consistent one?” Evan wondered.
“Lucy makes fake gagging noises every time it comes up,” Tommy admitted. “Grilled cheese with peanut butter and tomatoes on it. Usually needs to be on sourdough bread, cinnamon-raisin bread on one particularly notable occasion though.”
“Like all together in the sandwich heated up?” Evan wondered.
Tommy nodded and shrugged. “It's what the kid wants. Can’t wait til she decides she’s sick of them.”
“No kidding.” Evan mumbled and sipped his drink.
“Look, I’m sure you have things you want to say and ask, and so do I. There’s a lot up in the air at the moment and I just want to make something super clear before we get any further.” Tommy told Evan.
“Okay,” Evan sat up straighter and made sure he was showing that he was paying attention.
“I know I told Lucy, to tell Eddie, to tell you this, but I wanted you to hear it from me directly also. If you don’t want to be involved, I don’t expect you to. The last thing I want is for you to feel trapped by this in any way. So, if you’re not interested you can walk away now, no hard feelings. I can’t promise she’ll never get curious or grow up and find you herself, but if you don’t want to be a part of this, I will keep you out of it as much as I can.”
“Tommy I want to be involved-” Evan started.
“And if that is genuinely what you want Evan, then great.” Tommy cut in. “But if you think there is even the smallest chance you’re gonna wake up one day and regret staying, just walk away now. It’s one thing for us to break each other’s hearts, it’d be another to do that to our daughter.”
“I know I just found out but I swear I’m not going anywhere. I- I’ve been a sperm donor before- I told you about Connor and Cameron’s son- and I’m not interested in doing that again, Tommy. I want to be a part of my daughter’s life.” Evan insisted.
Tommy nodded and almost smiled. “Okay.”
(Read the full chapter on ao3)
#911 fanfic#bucktommy#bucktommy fanfic#tommy kinard#evan buckley#ao3 fanfic#mpreg#mpreg tommy#pregnant tommy kinard#current wip
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I wonder if Momo being small will be a saga long plot point or only last till the end of this arc? I was leaning towards the latter at first b/c I figured the author wouldn't want Momo to be out of commission for a long time and the arc directly following her being shrunk was about fairies, but now that the pygmies seem to be a dead end, I'm not so sure. If the first saga was the entire group helping Okarun, and Okarun growing as a person, it would make sense for the second one to be about them helping Momo, and her development. Also, Momo's fighting ability isn't hindered, so she won't be useless plotwise. I could definitely see a bunch of arcs where they follow up on leads about shapeshifting aliens and ghost and such, only to run in to trouble and dead ends, like how looking for Okarun's balls lead them to meet different supernatural phenomena and antagonists and other players were after them as well.
I like both options (I don't really mind that Momo being shrunk down will push back the confession. I think the romance has been really well paced so far, so some dragging now probably won't make me stop liking it), but Momo being small for a long time will mean that she won't be able to act independently for quite a while. Yes, she can definitely still hold her own in fights but she can't like. Go to the grocery store. She needs help eating/drinking, moving around, and because most people can't see her, communicating. She'll also be considered absent from school and she can't go to work or talk to her non paranormal friends or even wear the clothes she likes. Which could be very interesting to explore! Momo having to rely on others much more than she's used to could lead to a lot of fun character interactions and growth. But it might mean that we won't see much of the world outside of the supernatural elements, unlike in the first saga, where we could see the effects of the characters' adventures bleeding into their everyday lives. It also might mean that there will be less chances to show Momo's personality- her confidence, independence, and sense of style.
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isaac with a listener who had a toxic mother growing up?? hurt/comfort please, i've had a rough week :(
Ofcourse my child let mama peppy comfort you may I bless you with a better week
Shadows of the Past
Isaac Rhoades x Pickle
The rain fell steadily against the windows, a soft melody that filled the stillness of the room. You sat curled on the couch, lost in thought, your gaze unfocused on the faint glow of the television. Though Isaac had been in the room with you, you barely noticed when he disappeared into the kitchen. He returned moments later, a warm mug of tea in his hands.
Quietly, he set it down on the table before settling beside you, his movements deliberate and calming. His gaze, piercing yet tender, lingered on you for a moment before he spoke.
“You’re carrying something heavy,” he said softly. “I can see it in the way your shoulders curl, the way your hands tremble. What is it, my love?”
You hesitated, the words caught in your throat. Isaac always had a way of unearthing the thoughts you tried to bury, of coaxing them out into the light with his quiet persistence. But this... this was a pain so deeply ingrained, you weren’t sure how to put it into words.
“It’s nothing,” you murmured, the crack in your voice betraying you.
He moved closer, his hand resting gently on your knee. The touch grounded you, soft yet firm, like a tether keeping you from being swept away. “Don’t do that,” he said, his voice low and steady. “Don’t diminish what you’re feeling. You can tell me. Always.”
A single tear slipped down your cheek, and you looked away, ashamed of your vulnerability. “I was thinking about my mom,” you finally admitted, your voice barely audible.
Isaac didn’t react immediately, but his hand stayed where it was, offering silent support. “Go on,” he urged, his tone a gentle nudge.
You drew a shaky breath, the words spilling out before you could second-guess them. “She wasn’t like most mothers. She was... controlling, cruel. She tore me down every chance she got, made me feel small, like nothing I did was ever good enough. And then, somehow, she’d twist it so I felt like I needed her approval just to exist.”
Isaac’s jaw tightened, a flicker of anger flashing in his eyes, though his grip on your knee remained steady.
“She criticized everything,” you continued, the pain of each memory sharpening your voice. “My looks, my choices, my dreams. She’d compare me to other people, like I was a disappointment she had to endure. And if I ever tried to stand up for myself... she’d guilt me until I felt like the worst person alive.”
Isaac’s hand slid up to cradle your face, his thumb brushing away a tear. When you met his gaze, you saw something that made your breath catch—a depth of emotion so profound, it was almost overwhelming.
“My love,” he began, his voice low and sonorous, each word chosen with precision, “it is an unspeakable cruelty to wound a soul as pure as yours. The torment she inflicted is not your burden to carry—it is a testament to her own inadequacies, her own failure to recognize the radiance you possess.”
The weight of his words settled over you, a soothing balm to the ache in your chest.
“She stole pieces of you, didn’t she?” he asked, his tone a mixture of sorrow and fury. “She took your confidence, your joy, and replaced them with doubt and pain. But hear me now, my love: you are whole. Even with the scars she left behind, you are whole, and you are extraordinary.”
You blinked rapidly, your tears flowing freely now, and Isaac cupped your face with both hands, as if shielding you from the shadows of the past.
“She sought to diminish you because your light outshone her fractured soul,” he continued, his voice soft yet commanding. “But you are brilliance personified. Every scar you bear is a testament to your strength. Every step you take away from her is a victory, a defiance of the narrative she tried to write for you.”
Your voice trembled as you whispered, “Sometimes I still hear her... telling me I’m not enough.”
Isaac’s jaw clenched, and he leaned forward, his forehead resting gently against yours. “Then let my voice rise above hers,” he said, his words a tender vow. “Let me drown out her echoes with truths that are irrefutable: you are enough. More than enough. You are a symphony of grace and resilience, a masterpiece of heart and spirit.”
You closed your eyes, letting his words wash over you, filling the voids left by years of doubt and pain.
“You are the very dynamics of beauty and strength,” Isaac continued, his tone reverent. “And I, who have seen the depths of you, find myself in awe every single day. To me, you are not broken. You are radiant, my love. And no voice, not hers nor anyone else’s, can take that from you.”
You sobbed openly now, your face buried in his chest as his arms wrapped around you, holding you with the unwavering steadiness you so desperately needed.
“I love you,” you whispered, the words fragile yet fervent.
“And I you,” Isaac murmured against your hair, his lips brushing the crown of your head. “With a depth that words cannot fully capture, but I will try, again and again, for as long as you’ll allow me. You are safe here, my heart. Always.”
In his embrace, you felt the chains of your past loosen, the weight of your mother’s voice fading beneath the steady, unrelenting strength of Isaac’s love.
P.S. Hey… hey, you! 🫵🏾 Do you want more Sakuverse gay shit? Hit that follow button and send in a request! You’ll get notifications whenever I post new fics or Sakuverse Reimagined Twist of Fate, and maybe even a chance to have your OC featured in a story.
#sakuverse#zsakuva#peppymintdreamsproduction#isaac rhoades#zsakuva isaac#isaac is angy#sakuverse isaac#isaac rhoades x reader#isaac#isaac x reader#whatcha fina do pickle#pickle is in a bit of a pickle 🤪#angst#angst with a happy ending#ask the mint and you shall receive#ask and you shall receive my dream child
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did yall think i was being facetious? think again!
-the Heaven's unofficial blessing-
[note: this is chinese history rpf not tgcf. it is not about your favourite struggling homosexuals. it is about a different set of struggling homosexuals altogether. you're still welcome to read it though!]
"—and where is the Duke of Pei County?" asked Zhang Liang, "I'd like to see him."
"Oh, uh, certainly, Sir!" cried General Fan Kuai with a rapidly sinking heart. “It’s just that, well, you see…” He quickly cast an eye around the camp as subtly as he could manage, trying—and mostly succeeding—to not look like a retainer whose liege lord had just run off like a randy hunting dog. Shit, shit, shit, but this was on him, let’s be honest. Never assume Liu Bang will stay in the same spot you left him. The fucking Yellow River was less capricious.
"My liege is overseeing the eastern supply depot,” Xiao He lied fluently. Heaven bless the man, he even managed to sound perfectly officious in spite of his stuffy nose, “Sir, why don't you join us for some hot wine while I send a runner to inform him? Duke Liu will make time immediately, I'm sure--"
Zhang Liang raised his hand and pointed behind them, "Could that be him over there?"
Fan Kuai didn't need to check if it was Liu Bang or not. Xiao He's frozen expression told him all that he needed to know. The general took a fortifying breath and slowly turned around, as happily as a man being held at sword-point. What he saw made the amicable smile congeal on his face.
"It's…really too far away to tell," Xiao He said weakly; at the same time, Fan Kuai let out a stifled but very emphatic, "Oh fuck me."
"I think it is him!" Zhang Liang said cheerfully, pointing out the small figure wandering across the distant hillock. Of the three men, he appeared to be the only one who wasn't appalled or even surprised to see Liu Bang—the new Duke of Pei County, beloved leader of the rebel forces and sworn brother to the fearless Lord Xiang Yu—on his hands and knees, rooting through the mud like a prize-winning sow.
Xiao He made a valiant last stand for the sake of their collective dignities, "the wine, Sir, will be getting cold—”
"Duke Liu of Pei County, I presume?" Zhang Liang called out in greeting. His soft, lilting voice barely carried over the din of the infantry and horses. For a miserable, hopeful second the two retainers prayed that Liu Bang wouldn't be able to hear him—but bugger them all, Old Liu's wandering attention had a way of picking up the most minute details when it was least convenient.
"S'goin'on," Liu Bang answered with a toss of his handsome head and a perfunctory bow, all done without getting up. He flashed a winning smile in their general vicinity and went right back to his excavation.
"Good, he doesn't look busy," said Zhang Liang, "I'll give him my regards now," in a flash, the strategist had tied up his trouser legs and was picking his way through the quagmire. The two retainers exchanged a helpless look of commiseration and quickly followed suit.
The muddy hill proved to be no obstacle for tall, gracile Zhang Liang, who floated over the muck as gently as a soap bubble. His hosts, who were both portly men more inclined to grow sideways than upwards, were left behind to slip and slide in every direction except forwards, all while clinging futility to each other’s shoulders and biting back muffled curses.
Xiao He nervously dabbed the sweat from his brow as he stumbled along, cheeks aflame. He had served as an indispensable secretary for three magistrates and wrote calligraphy while still in split-pants. He was uncustomed to such ignominy and looked like he wished the earth would swallow him whole the next time he fell flat on his arse. Fan Kuai could sympathize, he wanted the same thing—except with Liu Bang. This was their one chance to impress a local hero, and now it was all going to dogshit because Liu Xiaoer couldn’t do as he was told for half a fucking sichen.
Zhang Liang, who was nearly at the top, suddenly stopped in his tracks, as if he just noticed he dropped something. He quickly retraced his steps and came back down the hill to help the floundering Xiao He. The strategist was far too slight to act as much of a counterweight, but he made surprisingly effective progress by laying a steadying hand on Xiao He's elbow, and directing him where to step. It improved Fan Kuai’s opinion of him, but not by much.
“Do you need help, too, General?” Zhang Liang asked pleasantly, pausing to hold out a slender white hand that looked like it had never done anything more strenuous than grind ink. Fan Kuai gave a monosyllabic response to the negative, and the hand disappeared back into its sleeve, though the strategist’s bland smile had not budged an inch.
After what seemed like an epoch of struggling, they finally rounded the hump and came to a plateau that was tolerably dry. The rainwater had been coaxed downhill by the persistent wooing of gravity, and both men breathed a sigh of relief to have solid ground under their feet at last. There was Liu Bang, the colossal pain-in-the-arse himself, staring intently at two deep, parallel furrows in the ground. The gently sloping hill was covered by these jagged trails, stretching at least three-quarters of a li east and west. Each one was around two hands deep and mathematically regular. They were wagon-wheel tracks made by the retreating Qin army six days ago. Their passage had savagely gouged out the wet mud, and the sun had baked it solid, turning the field around them as wrinkled and craterous as the face of a one-hundred-year-old man.
Liu Bang was kneeling on some dusty, yellow clay, now rendered brick-hard by the sun. He was trying to dig up—or rather, chip away at something with the aid of a twig—and had been going at it for some time without much success, judging by the pile of broken sticks beside him.
When the group appeared in his line of sight, the duke looked up with a smile and cried, "Ah, Secretary Xiao, there you are! Just the man I wanted to see!”
“My liege?” Xiao He panted, trying to retrieve one of his shoes which had been sucked off by the mud.
“Here,” like a magician performing a trick, Liu Bang produced a bundle of dirty roots and pressed it warmly into Xiao He’s hands, “I got some wild ginger for your cold.”
“My liege—” Xiao He protested weakly, probably because he didn’t want to go back down that god-forsaken hill with gravity working against him and one hand impeded, but this was interrupted by a phlegmy chest-cough which rendered his argument moot before it could be voiced—so he was left standing there with his arms outstretched, shoe in one hand, ginger in the other, and in the span of those five coughs, Liu Bang’s attention had already packed up and moved along. The Duke turned to Zhang Liang and said solemnly, “Strategist Zhang, on behalf of the Chu Kingdom, we are deeply honoured to welcome your presence again.”
“Likewise, Duke Liu.”
“What’s mine is yours, Sir, you need only ask. Chu is eager to help you in any way in order to fight our common enemy.”
“Your generosity is greatly appreciated, my lord.”
Fan Kuai let out a sigh of relief. All right, so that wasn’t a total unmitigated disaster. He had been a little apprehensive that Liu Bang wouldn't recognise their guest, he had only spoken to Zhang Liang once in passing, and that had been at Xiang Yu’s extravagant banquet two months prior. Well, jokes on him; Old Liu never forgot a face. The speech itself was faultless too—he just wished the bastard didn't have dirt smeared on his nose.
“Nice weather, eh?” Liu Bang blew a few loose strands of hair from his eyes. He was no less sweaty or flushed than his men, the only difference was that exertion looked good on him. Handsome buggers like Liu Xiaoer were born with that aura about them, Fan Kuai noted with a touch of angry fondness, it was the one degree of difference that poets used to separate the florid jowl from the rosy cheek. He was also no less dirty than the other men; the only difference was that he did not give a damn and, thus, was quite content.
Liu Bang caught Fan Kuai’s eye and grinned unreservedly, as if he’d been waiting all day for him to come along. His smile shamed the sun, and Fan Kuai felt the edge of his own mouth creep upwards without his permission. The general frowned harder to compensate. Fuck, it was hard to stay mad at Liu Bang when he was like this. The man's excitement rubbed off like coal dust. One touch and everyone had sooty faces. He had been jealous of Liu Bang, once upon a time, back when he was an attractive, popular, charming boy. The sharp edge of resentment had long been worn smooth by age and intimacy. The years hadn't improved Fan Kuai's own looks, but it had given him wisdom. His childhood feelings had been rooted in fear—fear of being tossed aside like an old toy after this beautiful scatterbrain got bored of him. The thirty years they had spent together had proven otherwise. Liu Bang might get bored of games and objects, but he never got bored of people.
The Duke of Pei County turned his head to wipe his sweaty brow against his shoulder. It was the same habit he had preserved from childhood, except now his eyes had crow’s feet, his hair was more grey than black, and there was a real sword hanging from his belt instead of a stick.
"Lost yer keys, did ye?" Fan Kuai grumbled, switching to the informal ‘you’ to make a show of displeasure. He shrugged off the pointed look Xiao He gave him. He didn't give a dog's arse that the so-called genius could hear them bicker. Their 'fearless leader' was literally wiggling in the dirt like a fucking worm, what was there left to salvage? They hadn't so much as lost face as drop-kicked it straight off the edge of a cliff.
Liu Bang only grinned in response, "gotta knife?"
Both men answered without hesitation. Years of fielding Liu Bang's non-sequiturs had made them very mentally agile.
"Unfortunately not, my liege."
"Fuck no," growled Fan Kuai, "and even if I did, I wouldn't let ye dig around the dirt with it!"
Xiao He looked like he wanted to dive head-first off the proverbial cliff, after their proverbial dignity, "General, please mind your language…"
"Aw, what a shame," Liu Bang clicked his tongue thoughtfully, "See, the ground's packed solid but I think I can get it out if I had the right tool..."
Fan Kuai rolled his eyes, "just use yer sword."
Liu Bang laughed "Old General Fan, it's always blunt force with you! I might chip it if I do that."
"—and ye still haven't told us what 'it' is!"
"My lord," said Xiao He, endeavouring to get a word in edgeways, "we have a guest here—"
"My hair! Of course!" Liu Bang shouted; his delight was so violent that Zhang Liang, who had been hovering in the background, silently watching the show with his unblinking owl eyes, flinched and covered his ears.
'So much for a military genius,' Fan Kuai thought wryly, 'the only thing that white-faced little wimp is good for is a bed-warmer. He wouldn't last two seconds on a battlefield—' and then his attention was monopolized once again by Liu Bang. The duke had pulled out his ivory hairpin and was using it to scratch the clay crust with tiny, careful strokes. In spite of his annoyance, Fan Kuai couldn't help but be impressed. In a world where most people thought in straight lines, Liu Bang's mind was capable of moving sideways. Four-fifths of the time, it was a right fucking hassle that led them down all sorts of convoluted paths, but that remaining one-fifth was worth staying around for.
Xiao He winced, “My liege, I seem to recall that hairpin was part of your wife's dowery."
The blood drained from Liu Bang’s face "Oh, shit…" After a moment of consideration, he set his jaw manfully and resumed his digging, "fuck it, it's already chipped. Ain't no point in quitting halfway, I gotta see this thing through till the end."
"You're a braver man than me," Fan Kuai muttered; the mere thought of Liu Bang's wife, Lu Zhi, had him subconsciously slipping back into the formal ‘you’. Heaven might have failed to bestow Fan Kuai with looks or charm, but he definitely lucked out in marrying the other Lu sister.
The hairpin began to grind against pieces of half-buried gravel with a hair-raising screech. The sound made Zhang Liang leap backwards as if he had been burned; his entire face was scrunched up in extreme distaste as if the awful sound was assaulting all five of his senses at once, not just his hearing, but smell, sight, touch and taste as well.
Fan Kuai laughed rudely. Call it pay-back for the impromptu mud bath or whatever, but that little white-face deserved to be knocked down a few pegs. To his disappointment, Zhang Liang did not seem to register the insult, or even his presence for that matter. He had eyes only for Liu Bang. Far from being angry, the strategist seemed to grow more and more excited with each pass of the hairpin. Nothing showed on his oddly blank face, of course, but he was leaning forward at an oblique angle that was growing steeper by degrees, and his hands were fluttering slightly in his sleeves. Fan Kuai was not easily given to flights of fancy, but he thought he saw a ghostly fire dancing in his eyes. Suddenly, the rumours about Zhang Liang being a wizard seemed a little less implausible.
"Got it!" Liu Bang gave a triumphant hoot and held aloft his prize.
General Fan Kuai had made a careful show of being aloof up until this point, but now he pushed forward to see it. The dirty object was no bigger than Liu Bang's palm, it was flat and circular, with a square hole in the middle. It looked like a big version of the First Emperor's half-liang coins. A length of frayed, muddy string was tied to one end. The four men recognised it immediately as a jade pendant, the type that fancy gentlemen were supposed to hang on their waists—something they couldn't afford, even if they pooled all their money together.
"Nice!" Fan Kuai bellowed, clapping Liu Bang on the back. No need to call in the oracle, this was an auspicious sign if there ever was one!
“A lovely find, my liege,” replied Xiao He evenly, “shall we make our way back now? We can celebrate with some hot wine—”
"I was following a rabbit over on that ridge yonder," the duke grinned, "Old Fan, we gotta set some snares later, I have a mighty hankering for stew. It'll go down great with the wolfberries I saw—anyways, the rabbit ran off, but I saw something glimmering over here, so I came up for a look. Good thing I did, eh? All that hard work paid off!”
A pale, delicate hand reached into the midst of their circle and paused in front of Liu Bang, palm held up expectantly, “Duke Liu, may I wash it for you?" Zhang Liang asked, his head tilted to one side in a bird-like manner. His other hand held a water gourd that Fan Kuai could have sworn up and down had not been there before.
"Sure, thanks!" Liu Bang was as friendly with strangers as he was with his bosom friends, "is Sir familiar with gemstones?"
Most people—experts, that is—would have done a whole song and dance about how they were talentless mediocrities who would sully the noble art of gem appraisal if they tried their hand at it. Zhang Liang just answered seriously, "Yes, I am."
"Great, then can you tell me what type of jade this is?"
Zhang Liang took his time washing Liu Bang’s pendant, gently rubbing the carved groves with the tip of his forefinger. After satisfying some standard apparent only to himself, he held it up to the afternoon sun and examined it with one eye half-shut. The jade hung suspended between his fingers, dripping and sparkling like a piece of heaven that had fallen to earth, "this is serpentine."
To hell with the complicated jargon, "Is it valuable?" Fan Kuai asked eagerly.
Zhang Liang gave him an infuriating half-smile, "No."
"Why not?" Liu Bang cried, looking offended on the jade's behalf, as if it was his darling little daughter being rejected by a suitor, "what could it possibly be lacking? It's elegant, polished, and has a ton of character! The outside is round like Heaven, the inside is square like the earth, and look here, it’s got these two blue lines running through it, just like the Long River and Yellow River! Now that’s a good luck charm if I’ve ever seen it!"
"All that is true, but beauty is not what makes a gemstone valuable,” Zhang Liang replied, his smile growing exponentially along the twin axes of opaque and infuriating, "Scarcity is what makes it valuable. Everyone covets what no one else can have. A piece of mutton-fat jade is worth ten times its weight in gold because it's hard to come by, not because a white rock is inherently more lovely to the eye than a blue rock.”
Fan Kuai snorted rudely. Sure, he knew next to nothing about jade or whatever nonsense Zhang Liang was sprouting, but he could smell a huckster from thirty li away—in no small part because he was in-laws to one of Pei County’s finest ones, “And I suppose we should just leave this ‘worthless’ piece of jade in your reliable hands?”
Zhang Liang handed the pendant back to Liu Bang without looking twice at Fan Kuai, “It is not mine to keep. Besides, General Fan, I did not say it was worthless.”
“You calling me a liar, Sir?” The ‘Sir’ was enunciated in the same tones as ‘shithead.’
“I'm saying you misunderstood my meaning, General. I did not say it is worthless, I said it had no value.”
Liu Bang was enjoying the absurd discussion immensely, “But jade is jade, Sir. That’s why it’s valuable. Not only does it ward off evil, it’s also very useful. It’s extremely hard and doesn’t tarnish, so it’s good for pins and cups. People even used it for weapons in the olden days before bronze.”
“Yes, but it is not inherently worth as much as we pay for it," Zhang Liang replied. "It is valuable because we agree it is. Imagine what would happen if precious gemstones grew on trees,” Liu Bang grinned at the mental image he was painting. “The value of jade would plummet overnight. People would still use it of course, for the reasons you stated, but it would no longer be a precious item that costs many strings of cash. Children would use it to play knucklebones. The First Emperor’s Heirloom Seal would be no better than a pickle weight.”
“A pickle weight!” Liu Bang laughed uproariously, slapping his knee. In spite of his good humour, the stubborn set of Liu Bang’s chin told Fan Kuai he wanted to argue the point further but could not think of a good rebuttal. Fan Kuai wanted to help, but was equally at a loss. The whole thing felt wrong, like someone saying up was down, like a fundamental truth was being questioned. He almost said, ‘You could sell the jade,’ but to who, exactly? Even he could spot the holes in that logic. Everyone already had it, and jade had limited uses as a practical item. It wasn’t something that could be consumed either, like firewood, or an extra joint of pork you could salt up and hang in the cellar.
“I suppose the analogy is like counterfeiting currency,” Xiao He mused, coming to their rescue. It was amazing how gallant a fat, balding man with a runny nose could be, under the right circumstances, “if there is too much cash in circulation, it will devalue the official mint.”
“What he said,” Fan Kuai agreed confidently.
“You can certainly see it that way,” Zhang Liang replied, but his eyes were still boring into Liu Bang, like he was hoping to strike a secret wellspring somewhere inside him, but a wellspring of what, exactly? “Duke of Pei County, if you wish to sell this pendant, do not accept an offer of less than ten strings of cash. That is my final appraisal, should you choose to accept it.”
“I trust Zhang Zifang wholeheartedly!” said Liu Bang warmly, he rubbed his bearded chin, “but I’ve decided I won’t be selling. It doesn’t seem right to give this jade to someone who only cares about how much money it’s worth. They won’t appreciate it’s beauty like I do. Besides, I was the one who got my hands dirty, I deserve a little keepsake for the effort. It'll make a funny story to tell my grandkids, if nothing else.” notes:
haha this one was really on the nose guys, but what i can i say, subtlety is not my middle name: liu bang is able climb out of the quagmire and obtain the 'mandate of heaven' because of his opportunistic nature, stubbornness, willingness to get his hands dirty, and some very talented, ride-or-die friends.
Liu Xiaoer: "second-son Liu" childhood nickname based on birth order. Can also be slang for "waiter," given how in-demand he is. I think his more "official" nickname should be Liu Erlang, "Lang" meaning "handsome young man".
"little white face" 小白脸-- twink/ boytoy / kept man.
wolfberries: fun fact, the word 枸杞 sounds like "dogberries" in chinese but it actually a different word. in any case, it still fits the extended dog metaphor, hell, he even digs out the jade with a piece of ivory, which is a fancy tooth!
Fan Kuai is married to Lu Xu, younger sister to Liu Bang's wife, Lu Zhi. man im really enjoying building up Lu Zhi's entrance like she's the secret final boss. yes, it doesn't escape my notice that people seem more scared of her than the actual fucking qin army.
banliang round coins with square holes were standardised during the reign of QSH. A jade pendant in this shape would have been highly unusual (i've never seen one) but there's nothing inherently unlucky/taboo about it (and tbh it's just here for the metaphor) so I'll give it a B- for historical accuracy.
blue and green were called the same thing during this time period 青.
the chu-han contention is rapidly becoming the heartwarming human interest story of a bunch of people coming togather to help a guy with unmedicated adhd ace his job interview
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if i had a nickel for each otp i have that's destined not to be together because ultimately their stories are not about a happy romance but rather of coming-of-age/maturity and deep mutual affection that can't be destroyed even by the bittersweetness of the narrative and the recognition of the barriers that stop them from being together, then i'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.
#when i was watching escaflowne all i could think about was the parallels between hitomi x van and merrick x shayla#like the stories and ships are so different but so similar#because even though i felt robbed of the ending in wild force#i still (begrudgingly) admit that raising our hopes for them getting together only to dash them was compelling and realistic#because their roles are so different that they're always doomed: even if merrick had fallen asleep with shayla in animarium#it still wouldn't have given them a happy ending or a chance for them to really be together#because they'd be asleep for what? another few millenia? and that's assuming the orgs ever return#if the orgs don't return then they'd be asleep forever but if they do then they wouldn't be able to enjoy anything just constantly waiting#for escaflowne too even though van and hitomi love each other and helped each other grow hitomi could never forsake her world for gaea#imo they both want to preserve the fondness for each other as smth sweet and not allow it to grow into a reminder of a bloodthirsty past#but let their memory cement a moment of hope and coming of age#merrick baliton x princess shayla#shayla x merrick#power rangers wild force#van fanel#hitomi kanzaki#tenkuu no escaflowne#the vision of escaflowne#escaflowne#my post#thoughts#fandom things#van x hitomi#sherrick#princess shayla#merrick baliton#i also feel like this could apply for gregor and luxa too#slightly#someone please be in the same small fandoms as me
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Looks like my loser liver is staying intact. I have two small lesions on my liver--which is not as scary as it sounds! They're called hemangiomas and are basically clumps of blood vessels. As it is, considering that I have no symptoms and am otherwise in good health, they're nothing for me to be worried about.
But, at the same time, it's not a good idea to go cutting around them. And it also doesn't make my liver the best choice for the recipient.
Next step is to start the process of kidney donation. Which I'm cautiously optimistic about, because the scans didn't find anything wrong with those guys. I guess, in one way, it's selfishly good news, because kidney donation is significantly safer, but it's still a huge bummer. Ah, well. I'll just have to thinking about kidney puns instead of liver puns.
#the organ trail#what's a girl gotta do to get someone to carve out her organs?#silver lining#i got a bunch of testing that i never would have gotten otherwise at my age#and it's not bad to have confirmation that that my heart and lungs are completely normal#and my liver is functioning fine#(i'll have to get them checked in a year#because there's a *small* chance that they could grow and *if* they grow#there's a *small* chance they could cause problems#and even then the treatment is simple)#getting even more tmi#i found out i have to get a mammogram because the mri found something#which again is almost certainly nothing to be worried about#and that on one hand sucks#but it's way better than it being there and me not knowing it
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you're on your own, kid marauder characters:
regulus black
emmeline vance
remus lupin
mary macdonald
peter pettigrew
#the turning their backs on those closest to them in order to fulfill a dream they have#and ending up in misery. loneliness. and regret.#but they still wouldn't have changed anything if they could#regulus black growing up feeling alone. especially when sirius gets put in gryffindor and leaves him behind.#and he has to make a decision for himself. and turns to darkness because that's whats near him. that's what stayed with him.#but it isn't what he thought it could be. and he destroys it. or aims to. and as such burns the friendship of everyone he knows#emmeline vance growing up a dreamer. wanting to make be important. fighting for attention from her parents that they gave to her siblings#and she joins the order. a place she could finally be recognised and seen. but she's not part of Dumbledore's plan#so she gets no big missions. makes no big changes. and she misses her chance with the first war. she feels like a failed soldier#she tries to become an auror. but fails the process. her newts not good enough. so instead joins the british muggle military#but then the order is remade and dumbledore grasps her back. and she willingly lets him because perhaps finally its her turn#to be recognised for her bravery and her life and her talent. and nothing matters but that. it is what her entire life was for.#and it ends in death. a small recognition for her sacrifice. but nothing like she wanted#remus lupin growing up isolated and alone because of who he is. he was taught to make it on his own#that he didn't need friends in his life. that wasn't an option for him.#but he made some regardless. and it was the most important thing to him. and he owed it all to dumbledore#so he did everything dumbledore told him too. he owed him his entire life. and lost it all as a result.#mary macdonald not wanting to give her life to a fight thats meant to be protecting people like her#so she leaves everything behind. her friends protesting her decision but nothing could make her stay#and she gains everything she could dream of by losing everything she had#peter pettigrew growing up isolated but his creativity knew no bounds. he had dreams of starting a band. of people buying his art.#but the war took that opportunity. that hope. those dreams and instead he focused solely on one dream. survival.#so he did anything he could to maintain it. no matter what it took. or what he had to take#marauders era#marauders#regulus black#emmeline vance#remus lupin#mary macdonald#peter pettigrew
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the depth of abandonment trauma i'm discovering i have is kind of insane
#my dad was absent by choice and my mom by circumstance and i raised myself#god. that's fucked up#i saw a reel earlier about growing up with an absent mother and it just stung me to my core#all the little things i forgot. coming to her about something and i couldn't show her it. she would be napping or praying or something#and want me to leave her alone. or i would want to tell her about things and she wouldn't feel well and i would never get the chance#i asked her so many times when i was a teenager if we could do things and she was always too busy or not feeling well or forgot#or couldnt or wasnt interested. and then she would complain we never spent time together or did anything fun#she didnt go to any of my plays. or my graduation celebrations#or my choir performances. i had to drop clubs to take care of her#she would be on the phone when i needed to talk to her about things or ignore me after my dad gave me verbal beatings to sleep#and i would have to sit in the hall and cry quietly from like ages 7-10 for her to pay any attention when it got late#i had to hide food wrappers in the trash because she restricted the kind of food i could eat and did the crunchy mom food shaming thing#i didnt tell her about my friends or my life or my online world or even when i was being stalked by my ex. because she wouldn't listen#i just felt quiet and small and worthless around her. nothing was ever a big enough problem for her for it to be worth anything more than a#one-off discussion that she would forget about. all she ever talked about was my brother and she gave him so many more chances than me#i love her still. she's done a lot of good things for me and my partner#and she's learning how to be better and she tried her best with a tbi and shitty marriage and other stuff#that being said. she still doesnt feel like my mother#an aunt if anything. but i dont think i can ever really see her as my mother#because she took all my care and kindness and then left me to raise myself when i needed her. both intentionally and not#and i dont know how to forgive her for that#wow! thats therapy topics for latwer. goddamn.#vent
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Shy
Pairing: Logan Howlett x Reader
Warnings: swearing, suggestive content
Summary: you have a crush on a certain co-worker but are too shy to tell him. so someone does it for you.
Word count: 2.6k
A/N: THIS WAS A REQUEST BUT WHEN I TRIED TO REPLY TO IT IT DIDNT LET ME AND DELETED IT INSTEAD (also jean is a meddling little shit in this and u just gotta accept that)
You watched him from across the hall greedily, eyes drinking in his panting form, the sweat coating his chest and back, the strained muscles underneath his wife beater tank top. Logan was a sight for sore eyes on a normal day, but when he was working out? He had you practically rabid for him.
You were sitting on one of the benches, a forgotten book in your hand you hadn’t glanced at in ages, preferring to treat yourself to the image of Logan Howlett hot and sweaty while working out. There were a few other X-men exercising alongside him, and others on the bench with you hanging out so you weren’t too out of place, but everyone could see the way you looked at Logan.
Everyone but Logan himself.
You’d joined the team a few months ago- 5 to be exact- after whispers had gotten to you of a safe space for mutants. Having hidden your true genetic code from everyone else in your life, you jumped at the chance of not having to hide anymore. With your unique skill set too- the ability to formulate and present illusions- you were an exceptional addition to both the X-men and the teaching staff.
You thrived at the X mansion. The kids loved you, you got along well with your fellow teammates, and you had suggested and helped act on several improvements to both the school and the team. You were a good addition, and the other mutants were grateful to have you there.
You’d just had one problem when acclimating to the school. Your teeny, tiny, incredibly small crush on your fellow professor, Logan Howlett. At first you really had thought it would be no big deal. Just a co-worker you had noticed was slightly attractive. That’s all. Other mutants had told you he was hard to talk to, and had a gruff, moody personality, so you’d thought the attraction would soon fade.
Unfortunately it had only grown. The first time you’d realised, shit, this might actually be a problem, was when you’d gone to get a glass of water in the middle of the night and found Logan leaning against the kitchen counter, shirtless, with a beer in hand.
You’d been so flustered, eyes continuously betraying you and straying to his chest that you’d blurted out the first thing that came to your head, “how’d you get beer in here?”
Logan had chuckled, observing you as he brought the beer bottle to his mouth for a sip. “Why? Want some Sweetheart?”
You’d felt heat rise to your face at the nickname, shaking your head. “No, I was just curious.”
Logan stared at you a second longer, eyes trailing your figure appreciatively before shrugging. “Your loss. And unfortunately I can't tell you how I got it. Gotta keep it a secret lest Xavier finds out.”
You were too flustered to argue so you’d just nodded, mumbled a quick goodbye, and quickly walked back to your bedroom. You hadn’t even gotten your glass of water.
There had been other similar instances over the past few months. Logan just had a way to get under your skin, to cause your heart to go into cardiac arrest every time he looked at you, which made it hard to conceal your ever growing crush on him from literally everyone. Even your students knew about it, or at least had their suspicions, and you prayed they were too intimidated by Logan to ask him any questions about it. The last thing you needed was to get humiliated and have to pack up all your things and leave the home you had just created for yourself because you could no longer look any of your co-workers or students in the eyes again.
Especially Logan.
Things had escalated until you could barely look Logan in the eye anymore, and actively avoided him at all costs. The last thing you wanted to do was embarrass yourself in front of him, and though it was unpleasant you’d decided the best course of action was just to steer clear of him altogether.
Still, you allowed yourself some enjoyment, like watching Logan workout from afar while in a room full of people. The onlookers weren’t the best, but it was better than being alone with him when who knows what would happen.
“Like what you see?”
Storm’s voice dragged you out of your ogling, and you turned to her with a sheepish expression. “Maybe.”
She gave you a knowing look, raising her eyebrows. You ignored it, because you’d heard her suggestions many times before and found they didn’t align with your own interests.
“Go and tell him how you feel.”
And embarrass yourself when he inevitably rejects you? No thanks. You were more comfortable with keeping your feelings suppressed, continuously shoving them down, building a brick wall between them and you, to permanently keep them out. Yet for every single brick you added somewhere below you could feel three more being punched out, slowly destroying your barricades bit by bit.
Your eyes strayed back to Logan, like they always did, yet surprise striked you when you couldn’t find him. Your eyes scanned the room like a man on a mission, only to realise too late Logan was heading towards you, a towel in his sweaty grip.
He greeted Storm with a nod before his gaze zeroed in on you, and you mentally added another brick to your shield, determined to keep him out this time.
“Y/n,” he greeted, eyes never straying from your face.
You looked down, fidgeting with your hands. “Logan,” and, because you were incredibly weak willed- “did you have a good workout?”
You swear as you looked back up at him you saw the remnants of a smile on his face, but it was gone in the blink of an eye so you couldn’t be completely sure. You don’t think Logan had ever smiled at you, and you felt the bricks within you start to wobble.
“It was alright,” he said curtly, ever the man of few words. He lingered though, as if debating to say something, when it came out anyway. “I’d like it if you joined us next time.”
You felt your heartbeat increase. You felt the jump and the rapid incline as you processed what he said, your mind swimming.
“Me? But I just do illusions… I don’t have a fight worthy mutation.”
“Which is exactly why you should workout. Build your strength so you don’t need to rely on others and can trust your own body to do the job, regardless of mutations.”
It was the most you think Logan had ever spoken to you all at once, and you were suddenly feeling very dizzy. Logan wanted you to workout with him, to spend time with him. Could you imagine? Standing alongside him while he panted. Sparring and ending up underneath him, his entire body weight crushing you between him. It was almost too much to think about.
You cleared your throat, trying to clear your mind of unhelpful distractions, and found your eyes glued to Logan as he brought the towel to wipe the sweat from his throat, his muscles straining right in front you as he reached behind the back of his neck, wiping the sheen of sweat from his body.
You were staring, you knew that, but you just couldn’t find it in you to look away. It was a godly sight, Logan in front of you, sweaty and staring right at you. How were you supposed to look away?
“Uhm,” you mumbled when Storm stepped on your foot. If she’d noticed your ogling Logan certainly must have, and you felt heat rise to your face at the thought. “Yeah, maybe. I’ll think about it.”
Logan looked at you again, really looked at you, before nodding, slinging the towel over a shoulder. “I hope to see you there.”
And with that he walked away, and you felt the bricks tumbling, clattering away inside you, and you could do nothing to stop it until you felt bare and vulnerable, watching the man walk away with the realisation this might be more than just a silly crush.
You couldn’t let that happen. Couldn’t let yourself go too far, even though you could already feel yourself falling. You needed stronger defences, more barricades and walls. And if that meant more space between you and Logan, more avoiding and distance, well, you’d do it. You couldn’ let yourself go past the point of no return with him. You couldn’t.
Your avoidance of Logan had continued ten-fold. Whenever he entered a room you would exit. You would no longer spend time watching him workout or teach or do anything, really. You stayed as isolated from him as possible, and when you couldn’t you stayed silent, eyes fixed ahead of you rather than on him.
Others had noticed. You heard the rumours, whispers of a fight, a break up that occurred between the two of you. It was laughable, the idea that you and Logan had ever been together in the first place.
It was working though, or so you thought. You could feel your shields and barricades strengthening each day, and you continued to build them higher and higher, in the hopes you would eventually not need to avoid Logan, for he would no longer have any effect on you.
Until then you were determined to avoid Logan and spend as little time with him as possible. Unfortunately Logan did not share that sentiment.
You’d just finished up a class, instructing your students to have their homework prepared for next lesson and watched them all file out the door when Logan entered. It was so unexpected you hadn’t a chance to leave before he was upon you, his figure towering over your frame. His arms were crossed and he watched you with a frown on his face, yet you weren’t afraid of it anymore. Sure, you had been originally, but soon you’d discovered behind the frown was usually no ill intent, so you weren’t nervous.
Well you were, extremely so, but not about that.
“Oh, Logan,” you managed, swallowing thickly. “What are you doing here?”
Logan crossed his arms. “We need to talk.”
You winced. “We do?”
He let out an aggravated huff. “LIsten, I don’t know what I did to make you so pissed at me but it can’t be this bad-”
You interrupted him, confused. “Wait, what?”
He sent you a look. “You. Being mad at me. I don’t know why.”
“I’m not mad at you.”
Logan paused, looking at you with a scrutinising gaze. “Yes you are.”
You scoffed at him wrongly telling you how you felt. “No, I’m not.”
“So why are you ignoring me? And don’t say you haven't-” Logan said, noticing you’d opened your mouth to defend yourself. “I know you are. You have been avoiding me for weeks, and if you’re not angry at me I can see no other fathomable reason for why you’re acting like I have the plague.”
I frowned. “You noticed that?”
Logan scoffed. “Of course I noticed it. You don’t even come to training anymore, not even to watch like you used to. Why?”
You shifted uncomfortably on your feet. You obviously couldn’t tell him the real reason, otherwise all the hard work you’d done would be for nothing because you’d end up humiliated and rejected anyway, but you knew Logan could tell when someone was lying from their pulse spiking, and yours certainly would if you lied about this.
You grappled for something to say, anything, to shake him off your trail. “I have to prepare for another class-”
“You’re not preparing for shit until you tell me what’s wrong,” Logan practically growled. “I can stay here all day Bub.”
Well shit. You didn’t really have another choice. You were going to have to tell him about your feelings for him. Literally anything else would have been better. Anything else.
At that exact moment Jean walked into your classroom and relief bloomed in your chest. You were saved, you were safe. You could use Jean as an excuse and-
“She was avoiding you because she has the hots for you, Logan. Something every single person in this school knows except you.”
Well, not anything else apparently.
Logan let out a noise of surprise and looked at you, but your eyes were glued to Jean, horror and betrayal painted on your face. She mouthed ‘your welcome’ and left. What the fuck? Was that the only reason she entered, to butt into your private conversation?
“Y/n. Was what Jean said true?”
You opened your mouth and then closed it, looking like something akin to a gaping fish. “Define truth.”
Logan narrowed his eyes at you, not at all amused, and his silence forced you to continue.
You sighed, preparing yourself for the inevitable heartbreak to come. “Yes, it’s true, alright, but I never intended to act on it and I won’t act on it so you’re fine-”
“Who said I didn’t want you to act on it?”
You started. “W-what?”
Logan took another step until your chest was suddenly pressed against his. “Did I stutter?”
You felt like you were going to stutter if you said anything, so you sort of just… stood there. Waiting. For what exactly, you weren’t sure. Some clarity maybe?
Certainly not Logan grabbing you by the waist and kissing you, so firm and confident you couldn’t help but melt into his embrace. His hands were grabbing your waist, finding the dips in your curves and squeezing there, grabbing them and tugging you towards him.
His lips dragged across yours, adding an air of desperation to the kiss. You couldn’t help but bring your hand up to cup his cheek, thumb stroking his bearded jaw as he kissed you deeper, seeming for all the world like he was never going to stop. You were powerless to stop it, and you found you didn’t even want to. Your walls were crumbling and you gladly let them if it meant you could continue kissing this man.
Logan hefted you up onto your desk and you let out a gasp, muffled by Logan’s lips. He smiled into the kiss anyway, amused by your surprise, and placed his hands on your knees to part them so he could get between your legs.
You immediately wrapped your legs around his waist, something he liked if the pleased grunt from his throat was anything to go by. His kissing became more fevoured, like he wanted to devour you, and you gladly let yourself drown in him.
That was until the school bell rang, startling you both out of the kiss. Or rather, just you, because Logan seemed content to move to your neck when your lips stopped responding.
“Logan,” you murmured. “I have a class to teach.”
Logan made an angry grunt and continued placing open mouthed kisses to your collarbone. You laughed and gently pushed him away, causing the man to growl and look at you with such irritation you’d think you interrupted his wedding or something.
“I’m busy here,” Logan said.
You had to physically swallow the breathless sigh threatening to escape your lips, instead saying, “we can continue this later.”
“We will continue this later.”
You smiled, almost shyly, which was ironic considering he was still between your legs. “Yeah?”
Logan moved forward so he could whisper into your ear. “Now that I have you Bub, I ain’t ever letting go.”
He pulled back and your smile widened, making a mental note to thank Jean when you next saw her. “I can live with that.”
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett#x men#x men fanfiction#x men x reader#x reader#james howlett#james howlett x reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#jean grey
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making the bed [c.sc]
MDNI, 18+
SUMMARY | you and seungcheol’s marriage is hanging on by a thread. separate rooms, broken conversations, and barely any contact, it's clear that what you once had is slipping away. desperate for a second chance, you both turn to couples therapy, but when intimacy—or the lack of it—becomes the topic of conversation, everything changes.
PAIRING | husband!seungcheol x afab!reader
CONTENT | nonidol!seungcheol, angst, bad relationships, miscommunication, fingering, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie
WORDS | 4.9k
A/N | quick disclaimer i know nothing about therapy sessions, so there may be inaccuracies. i loooved writing this ! i hope u enjoy it as much as i did, pls pls pls leave feedback if u can. ty <3 not proofread !!!
you woke up to yet another feeling of cold sheets beside you. the sun peeking through the curtains, the cool breeze of air conditioning meeting your skin. you shivered at the sensation. you patted seungcheol’s side of the bed, knowing you would be disappointed yet again. your eyes fluttered open, the sight of neatly tucked sheets on the opposite side of the bed made your heart heavy. as if he hadn’t slept there at all.
for months now, your marriage had a cloud looming over it. love that was once warm had grown cold and silent, reduced to taking care of household necessities and meaningless small talk. you couldn’t remember the last time you felt comforted by your husband of three years. and even if you did, the memory wouldn’t bring any comfort.
seungcheol’s career was at its peak. he was a few steps closer to getting promoted to a higher position at the firm he worked at. of course, along with this almost promotion, he had to sacrifice spending time with you. he was never home most days of the week. and if he were home, he would instead be resting and catching up on whatever sports he watched on tv.
needless to say, you were getting tired of that routine. you felt lonely. you tried to keep yourself busy with work or even joining a pilates class, but every corner reminded you of how much you missed your husband. the sight of other wives being picked up from work or how some husbands would join their wives for workouts. the feeling was gnawing at your chest.
you and seungcheol didn’t fight. in fact, you barely even talked. you resorted to cooking his favorite meals–which were mostly piling up in the fridge because he was never home–and steaming his suits for him. the silence that gathered in your home was louder than any argument could ever be.
it was strange, living together, yet he felt farther than when he went on his business trips.
you loved seungcheol. you were so in love with him that the thought of losing him terrified you. but sometimes you wonder if love alone was enough to hold your marriage together. you often thought about what went wrong, questioning if you ever did something to make him lose interest in you.
you sighed, pulling the covers off you to prepare for the day. after showering and brushing your teeth, you headed to the kitchen to make lunch. the silent air greeting you as you walked through your shared apartment. you decided to make coffee for your husband, even if deep down you knew it would just grow cold. you wanted to show your affection for him somehow.
you took a sip of coffee from your cup, the bitterness lingering longer than usual. you glanced at the clock, seeing it was almost time for your therapy appointment.
it was your idea to attend couples’ therapy, seeing it as a last resort to salvage your crumbling marriage. when you first suggested it to seungcheol, he was hesitant and weary about the idea of running to another person about your problems. but seeing that it would mean a lot to you, and he didn’t want to put up a fight, he agreed to give it a try.
you hadn’t seen seungcheol since the previous morning when he hastily left for work. bidding you goodbye with a tired smile when he left you alone in the kitchen. a small part of you was worried he had forgotten about the appointment, not wanting to be disappointed, so you decided to send him a text.
wifey <3: hi, just wanted to remind you about our appointment at 2 pm
you stared at the screen, fingers dancing anxiously as you awaited his response.
cheolie <3: yea, i'll meet u there
that was it. no greeting, no apology for not coming home the night before. you pursed your lips at his response. feeling somewhat disappointed with his nonchalance. you convinced yourself that he was preoccupied with his career, too busy to send you a proper response. but nevertheless you decided to brush it off, tucking your phone in your bag as you got ready to head out.
when you arrived at the clinic, you couldn’t help but glance around the waiting area to find a glimpse of your husband. but to your dismay, you were the first one to arrive. you took a seat in one of the empty chairs, scrolling mindlessly through your phone in an attempt to ignore the tightening feeling in your chest.
exactly a minute before the clock struck 2, the doors swung open, and seungcheol walked in. his hair was messy, bags surrounded his eyes, and his shoulders slumped. he looked like hell, you couldn’t help but wonder if this was affecting him more than it was affecting you. his eyes landed on you and he made his way towards you, sinking in the seat beside you.
“hey.” he said softly, eyes barely meeting yours. hearing his voice reminded you how much you missed him.
“hi.” your eyes scanning him. you heart fluttered at the proximity between the two of you. you weren’t sure whether you were just touch deprived or you just missed your husband too much–it was probably a mix of both–but the thought of having him close to you made your head slightly dizzy. your mouth opened to speak but decided against it. you wanted to tell him that you were glad he made it and how much it mattered to you. but words felt too heavy to speak, so you enjoyed the silent company he provided instead.
the therapist’s door opened, and a nurse emerged, calling his and yours’ last name. you both stood up, walking inside the room side-by-side, hands almost grazing each other.
you and seungcheol settled on the couch in front of the therapist. she offered you a soft smile, eyes flicking between the two of you.
“hi, mr. and mrs. choi. how are you two feeling today?” she asked, her tone gently with a hint of curiosity.
your eyes shifted to seungcheol, wanting to see if he would speak first. he shifted in his seat, clearing his throat. “it’s been… a busy week.” he let out, eyes glancing between you and the therapist.
your lips formed into a frown, fingers fiddling with each other. “it has been tough. recently i’ve been feeling like we’ve been living separate lives despite sharing the same space.” you forced yourself to speak, the words falling out of your mouth before you could even comprehend them. “i’m afraid that if we let it happen for too long, we might lose each other in the process.”
you could feel seungcheol’s gaze on you, his once tired eyes growing soft from taking you in. he could tell you were extremely upset, your lips quivering and your hands playing with one another–which you only did when you were visibly upset. he wanted to reach for your hand, to provide you with comfort. but his cowardness was taking over him.
she leaned forward, her voice soft but firm. “i see. this must be incredibly difficult for both of you.” her eyes flickered between the two of you. “if you both want to reconnect, we need to address the emotional and physical barrier forming between you.”
you felt a lump form in your throat at her words. you glanced at seungcheol only to find him staring at you. his expression was guarded and unreadable. you felt tiny under his gaze, not used to the intensity of his eyes on you.
the therapist cleared her throat, drawing both of your attention to her. “the effort you two took to meet me today is a sign that you both want to save this relationship, but it seems that there’s a lot of distance–both emotional and physical.” you shifted in your seat at her words. you couldn’t deny the truth; it had been a while since you had a proper conversation with seungcheol, let alone a moment of intimacy. “when was the last time you two… shared a moment of true closeness?” her question was left open. still, you and seungcheol know her meaning was leading to one thing.
your cheeks burned slightly at the thought of it. it had been months since you last shared a bed, weeks since he last held you close; you couldn’t even remember the last time you had sex. you glanced at your husband, wondering if he felt the same embarrassment or if the thought of this issue would bring him back to you.
seungcheol let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, a hand rummaging through his hair. “i-i don’t know, it has been a while.” he admitted, voice so soft you barely caught on to what he was saying. “i’ve been too caught up with stuff at work, i don’t think we’ve shared a bed in a while.” hearing him admit your problems made your heart ache. he was capable of acknowledging his mistakes, yet he made no effort to correct them.
she gave you both a sympathetic look. “it’s not uncommon for couples under this kind of strain to lose touch emotionally and physically. often, intimacy is the first thing to slip, but it’s also one of the most important bridges to reconnecting. i’d like to encourage you both to try spending time together, maybe even share the same bed, and just… see how that feels.”
the suggestion lingered in the air. silence erupting from the two of you as you processed her words. glancing at seungcheol, whose gaze was fixated on the floor while it seemed like he was in deep thought. seungcheol lifted his head, facing you briefly, his eyes filled with vulnerability for the first time in a long time. you caught your bottom lip between your teeth, nodding at your therapist while sending her a soft smile.
the session ended with an agreement to try. hoping that the words you heard today were a head start to fixing your crumbling marriage.
seungcheol mentioned that he had to return to work but promised to be home early. without having a choice, you went separate ways and decided to go home. your heart was heavy on the drive home. you weren’t sure how he took the session today and all you wanted was to talk to him, to hold him, for him to remind you that everything would be okay and that he loved you.
as the afternoon turned into evening, you couldn’t help but pace around the apartment. you already tried everything to keep your mind off of what happened today, but it was nearly impossible. your habit of cleaning every surface took place, every inch of the house spotless as you awaited your husband’s return. even catching up on your favorite series couldn’t help you keep your mind at ease.
you found yourself checking your phone every so often, the time taunting you as it nearly reached 7 pm and there were still no signs of seungcheol. you sighed, feeling a twinge of disappointment form in your heart. not wanting to feel the empty space of the house any longer, you decided to get ready for bed.
after taking a shower and doing your skincare, exhaustion begins to seep through your body. you felt stupid, stupid to think that seungcheol wanted it to work as much as you did. you started to accept that maybe he no longer needed you, no longer felt the same affection he had for you when you first started going out.
you lay in bed, going under the covers as tears escaped your eyes. the memories of you and your husband’s early days haunting you, wondering where it all went wrong.
you hadn’t noticed that you cried yourself to sleep. the sound of rustling around awoke you from your slumber. with heavy eyes, you tried to make out the source of the noise.
“fuck.” seungcheol whispered as he dropped his phone that had his flashlight on as he tried to navigate the room in the dark.
“cheol?” you mumbled, hand rubbing your eye as you sat in bed. seungcheol turned to face you with an apologetic look on his face.
“y/n!” he said, surprised, guilty that he had woken you up. “did i wake you? i’m sorry, i was trying to find a change of clothes.”
you leaned over the bedside table, turning on the lamp to provide light for him. eyes secretly glancing at the time, seeing that it was only 8 pm. “don’t apologize, this is your room too.” you said, but it felt more like a reminder than a statement; it had been so long since he slept here with you.
without saying a word, he stepped towards the bed, sitting on the edge while his back faced you. his shoulders were tense; you could tell he had much on his mind.
you watched with worried eyes as he sighed before he turned to face you. “i’m sorry, y/n.” his gaze was soft, lips dry as he mustered up the courage to speak to you. you inched towards him in bed, sitting directly in front of his body that was turned to you. “i know i’ve been… absent these past couple of weeks, months even. and your head was probably filled with thoughts about what was going on, and i-“ he gulped, tears forming in his eyes. it had been so long since he opened his feelings to you since he looked at you with warm eyes and honesty. the nights you spent alone and mornings waking up next to an untouched bed flashed before you. “i was trying to prove something… to myself, to you.” he admitted, his eyes filled with shame and regret. still, you listened to his words intently. “i thought that if i kept my head down and focused on work, i could finally give us this picture-perfect life that you deserve. and i-i thought you’d be okay with waiting.”
you took a moment to register his words. your fingers absentmindedly fiddling with one another–which he caught. you hadn’t been okay. the loneliness swallowed you these past few months, and his physical distance from you only made it worse. you missed him. you missed his scent, his touch–his hand on your back as you slept, the feeling of his arms around your shoulders, the way he pulled you close in his sleep. you missed the feeling of his soft lips, the feeling of his hands on your body. it had been so long since you felt good.
“you have no idea how hard it’s been, seungcheol.” you started, voice almost trembling as you spoke. “going to bed alone, having no clue if you’d even come home to me. i felt like i was losing you, little by little.”
“god, no.” for the first time in forever, seungcheol reached for your hands instinctively. comfort rushing through your body by his touch. he held your hands tightly, his eyes pleading. “i thought i was doing this for us, y/n, but i was being so selfish. i pushed you away. i pushed us away.” his voice cracked, pain written all over his face. “i missed you. i missed everything about you. i missed us.” he admitted, his thumb gliding over your hands in an attempt to provide solace. “i didn’t want to fail you, y/n.”
his eyes shut, a tear slipping down his cheek. you reached out to cup his face, your thumb wiping away his tears. you felt him lean against your touch, making your heart ache. you couldn’t remember the last time he had been this vulnerable with you. you could see how deeply he felt the loss, even if he had hidden it from you.
seungcheol’s eyes fluttered opened, his voice barely above a whisper. “i promise i’ll make up for the lost time. i want to show you that i’m here and i’m sorry. you’re not losing me.”
his words impacted you harder than you had expected, providing you with both comfort and hurt. it felt silly to be so relieved by his simple promise. but after longing for him for so long, you couldn’t help it. it was exactly what you were waiting to hear. the assurance from him was more than enough to give you ease.
instead of saying anything, you leaned forward and rested your forehead against his. he exhaled softly at your touch. god, you missed him. it meant everything to you that he was here. actually here.
“cheol.” you mumbled, eyes shutting. “i missed you so much.”
you felt him nod lightly. “i know, angel.” hearing his pet name for you flooded you with warm memories. “i missed you, too. more than you could imagine.” his hand slid to the back of your neck. you pulled away from his forehead, eyes staring up at him as he rubbed the skin. slightly shivering at his touch as it reached down into the parts of you that had felt cold and empty for so long. “let me make up for the lost time.” his voice was deep as his gaze on you darkened.
your eyes fluttered open, gaze falling to his lips. you let your hands slide down his shoulder, almost pulling his body close to you. he leaned closer to you, his breath fanning your face, lips brushing against yours. you melted into his touch as he connected his lips with yours. your hands finding their way to his chest as the kiss deepened, feeling his heartbeat beneath your fingertips. it reminded you that he was actually here, and you weren’t alone as you had felt for all those months.
seungcheol wrapped his arms around your waist as he laid you on the bed, your back meeting the soft sheets as he climbed between your legs. his thigh rubbing against your core that was growing warm with his every touch. feeling the tension between you dissipate with each kiss and touch. the gap between the two of you shrinking as he showed you just how much he missed you.
his fingers made their way to the hem of your shirt, pulling away from your lips to tug the fabric off your body, leaving your upper half naked. he groaned at the sight of you, reminding him how much he missed seeing your body. “god, i missed you.” he whispered before leaning down and pressing his lips to yours. moaning when his hand slipped between your legs, hand cupping your pussy that was growing wet at his mere touch. your body craving him more than you anticipated.
“cheol, i need you.” you whimpered against his lips as his fingers traced over your clothed core. desperation lacing from your voice made him grow hard against his suit. feeling his hard-on against your thigh. your hands reached up to undo his tie before unbuttoning his shirt. he hovered over you to give you more access, sliding the shirt off once you were done. you shamelessly checked him out, running your fingers over his chiseled chest. you almost forgotten how much you loved his body.
seungcheol hooked his fingers around the waistband of your shorts and underwear. sliding them down your legs, feeling your arousal sticking to the fabric. in a swift movement, he inched his body down the bed until his head was in between your thighs, face dangerously close to your throbbing pussy. he took a whiff, your familiar scent welcoming him. “you smell amazing, baby.” his arm hooked around and over your thigh, pulling your body close to him. bringing two fingers up to your entrance, collecting your arousal, and spreading it up to your clit. “so wet and needy for me.”
you moaned at his touch, hips bucking upwards as you tried to get more friction but his grip around you prevented you from moving. he softly smiled at your state, wasting no time in pressing his tongue against your clit. you gasped, hand flying down to grip his hair.
seungcheol ran his tongue up and down your folds, lips sucking on your clit, occasionally flicking his tongue over the sensitive bud. the sudden movements had your back arching off the bed, hand gripping the sheets beneath you as his tongue lapped your hole. “f-feels so good.” you whimpered.
his free hand snaked around your body, his thumb circling your clit while his tongue fucked your entrance. the sensation driving you crazy as you let out curses. he knew your body all too well. he knew exactly how to push you over the edge even after all these months.
“my pretty girl. i bet your pussy was waiting for me, hm?” he hummed against your folds, the vibrations sending shocks throughout your body. you lifted your head to meet his gaze, his eyes flickering to yours. maintaining eye contact, he slipped his fingers down your core, abruptly inserting two of them inside you. you could barely let out words once you felt his digits curl inside you. he beamed once he saw you writhe beneath his touch, glad that you weren’t that disconnected from each other in every way.
seungcheol pressed his mouth against your clit, sucking on the bud as his fingers relentlessly fucked your hole. thrusting them in and out of you in addicting movements. your hips jerk up from the overwhelming pleasure. toes curling as you felt a knot form in your stomach.
“p-please, cheolie, i want to cum.” your voice shaking as he continued his movements. your hand reaching up to your breast, squeezing them as you felt your orgasm forming.
“let it out, angel.” he whispered against your clit, sucking on it harshly to the point tears fill your eyes. without warning, you came undone with his fingers in you, cursing his name. your insides clenching around his digits as his movements slowed down. you head thrown back against the mattress as you let out shaky breaths.
seungcheol detached his mouth from your clit, pulling his fingers away before entrapping them with his lips. savouring your cum to account for the many months that went by without tasting you. “my good girl.”
seungcheol kneeled between your legs, his cock hard against his stomach–you hadn’t even noticed he took his pants off. you lifted your head to face him, mouth watering at the sight. nearly forgetting how big and thick his cock was. you wrapped your fingers around his length, pumping it lightly before stroking it. his hips inching towards you as he leaned into your touch. your thumb running over his tip that was leaking with precum. you looked at him through your lashes, but his eyes were already dark and focused on you.
“fuck, baby.” he grunted once you jerked him off, but his hand reached for your wrist to prevent your movement. “stop teasing, princess. i need my cock inside your pussy.” his confession made sparks shoot throughout your body and onto your cunt.
seungcheol positioned his body between your legs, gripping his cock in one hand, aligning it with your entrance. you couldn’t help the moans that escaped your lips as he glided the tip of his cock along your folds, spreading your wetness before sinking into you. you gasped at the size of his length. your fingernails digging (careful not to hurt him) into his shoulders as you adjusted to his size.
“i know, baby.” his voice soothed you, hushing you as tears threatened to escape your eyes. fuck, you forgot how his dick felt inside you. “you’re taking me so well, angel.” he pressed kisses all over your face.
once he was balls deep in you, he stayed still for a moment. letting you get used to the sensation, he reached for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours.
“m-move, please.” your voice barely a whisper. “you’re so big, cheolie.”
seungcheol growled at your words, slowly starting to move his hips. “missed your pussy, baby.” you felt every inch of his cock in you, insides splitting from his size. your insides burning, but it felt so fucking good. you bucked your hips, meeting his thrusts.
he took this as a sign to gradually increase his speed, his hips rocking into you faster. your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, pulling him even closer to you, scared that if you let go, he’ll disappear again.
the proximity allowing him to bury his cock deeper into you. in a swift motion, he pulled his cock out before slamming his hips against yours. sounds of skin slapping filling the room, along the moans that emit from you and the groans that escape his throat. he buried his face into your neck, leaving soft kisses against the skin.
“you feel so fucking good, shit.” his hand sneaked to your breast, taking your nipple in between his fingers, circling the sensitive bud. the rough pad of his thumb and index adding to the overwhelming pleasure. “fuck, i’m never leaving you alone ever again.”
you don’t know if it was his words or the pleasure from his cock that brought tears to your eyes. he pulled away from your neck, towering over you as he held eye contact with you. “my pretty wife, i love you so much.”
“i-i love you, cheol.” you breathed out, feeling him twitch inside you from your confession. the words felt foreign from your lips, but the feeling was reeling in so many memories. he picked up his pace again, relentlessly fucking you as if to remind you that he’s here now.
seungcheol leaned forward, capturing your lips with his. the kiss was more passionate and needy, his taste leaving you intoxicated. his hand inching down to your clit, rubbing circles on the nub. the stimulation building your orgasm even more. he knew you were getting close when you clenched around him, driving him to fuck into you deeper and harder.
“are you gonna cum for me, angel?” his voice deep as he watched you squirm underneath his touch. he latched his lips to your chest, sucking on the skin softly, enough to surely leave a mark. the overwhelming amount of pleasure he was providing was enough to drive you insane. the coil in your stomach begging to be released. “cum all over my cock, baby, let me feel you.” with the encouragement of his words, you released all over his cock. stars clouding your vision as you ride out your high. “s-shit, baby.” the sight of you cumming on his cock was enough to send seungcheol over the edge. with a few final thrusts, his warm seed burst inside you, painting your walls white, groans filling the room.
seungcheol slowly retreated his cock from you, his cum spilling from your pussy. you winced at the sticky feeling. he pressed a quick kiss on your forehead before he disappeared into the bathroom and grabbed a towel which he ran under cold water. he returned and immediately nursed you, dragging the towel up and down your entrance which made you giggle.
“thank you.” you mumbled as he went to return the towel in the bathroom.
“anything for my beautiful wife.” seungcheol grabbed a shirt from the closet, handing it to you because he knew how much you loved wearing his shirts to bed. even helping you slip it on your body. your heart warmed at the sight of him taking care of you. you barely noticed that he climbed into bed and pulled you close to his chest. “i told you, i’ll make it up to you, my love.” he whispered, pressing a kiss on the side of your head.
you could only nod at his words, feeling slumber take over you. hearing him whisper how much he loved you before falling unconscious.
-
you woke up to the warmth of a body shifting beside you, feeling the familiar weight of your husband’s arm around your waist. the soft morning light greeted you as you opened your eyes. you glanced at his sleeping figure, taking in the sight of his relaxed face, lashes resting against cheeks and lips slightly parted. he was still here. your heart was pounding so loudly that you were sure he'd hear it if he were awake.
your hand reached up to brush away the strands of hair falling onto his face. but before you could do so, his eyes fluttered open, a soft smile forming on his lips as he focused on you.
“g’morning.” seungcheol mumbled, voice deep and husky, still laced with sleep.
“good morning.” you responded, unable to hide the chipper in your voice. you rested your hand on his bare chest, rubbing the skin comfortingly, slightly scared that you were in a dream.
his hand fell to your back, pulling your body close to him. “i meant it, you know.” he whispered, his thumb rubbing circles along your back. “i don’t want us to fall apart again.”
your chest tightened at his words, but this time, the ache was different–it was hopeful. “neither do i.” leaning your head against his neck, softly kissing the skin.
“you have me forever, baby.” he said, a promise that felt as grounding as his touch on your body.
you closed your eyes, letting the warmth of his embrace engulf you. comfortable silence taking over as you lay there in each other’s arms. you both knew this was just the start of finding your way back to one another.
#💌 — reqs#FEEDBACK PLSSSS#choi seungcheol#seventeen#svt#scoups#seungcheol imagines#scoups imagines#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#seungcheol angst#scoups angst#seventeen angst#svt angst#seungcheol smut#scoups smut#seventeen smut#svt smut#seungcheol x reader#scoups x reader#seventeen x reader#svt x reader
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“You shouldn’t be up this late”
Bakugo’s voice whispered, filling the silence in the dorm kitchen. He was right, and usually you weren’t. You valued your sleep, often being one of the first in the class to call it a night. But tonight was different. Your thoughts, your heart, were restless. Despite following your nighttime routine, which was curated specifically to help you wind down and rest, you still found yourself tossing and turning. Not even your ocean sounds could help you drift to sleep. Thats why when Bakugo spoke, you sighed heavily and let your shoulders droop.
“Yeah. I know.”
He took a few steps toward you, leaning against the countertop. “So what’s got you awake?” You shrugged at him, watching the water in the electric kettle begin to form small bubbles. “Dunno…just can’t sleep I guess.” You looked over to him, taking soft note of his tired eyes and disheveled hair. “And you? You aren’t usually awake at this time either.” He shrugged right back at you. “Dunno…can’t sleep I guess” he echoed your words, and it made you smile just a bit.
You both knew why the other was awake, or at least you both had some inkling. Between how the ambush attack played out and Midoriya running away, neither of you have had time to really process all of what has gone on. You haven’t had time to think about how your lives had been flipped one eighty. But since Midoriya was back safe and sound, and there was no real information on the League or their next move, everything was at a standstill. That meant your brain was finally coming up to speed on what had gone on recently…and it was overwhelming. It felt like your mind was in over drive, thinking so many thoughts at once that it was causing you to lose sleep.
“…There’s a lot of water in this kettle. Would you like some tea?” Bakugo didn’t answer, just walked over to the mug cabinet and grabbed both of your designated mugs. Yours had your hero insignia, and he had his. It was Nezu’s Christmas gift for all of the hero course students. Bakugo opened the tea drawer, grabbing you each a packet of sleepytime zen tea before walking back over to you. You worked in silence then, enjoying each other’s company as you made your own cups.
Your relationship with Bakugo was unique. You admired him, even when he was a bit of an asshole at the beginning of the school year. You’ve enjoyed watching him grow and working beside him as a teammate. You were inspired by his tenacity and drive. You liked how smart and witty he was, and how he could be funny even when he didn’t realize it. It also didn’t hurt that he was actually pretty cute. And all of the same things went for you in his eyes. He admired your kindness and your courage. He was inspired by the way you had such a big heart but you were no push over, standing up to him when he got too rough with his words or during training. In his eyes, it was like you were one of the only people to give him a chance, getting to know him past his rough exterior. You two had gotten closer during the year, training and studying together sometimes. You began to sit next to him for lunch, stealing small pieces of chicken from his plate while he stole beef from yours. You were the only one with that privilege. Eventually, you became this unlabeled, unspoken thing. You didn’t have to confess your feelings because he knew, and you knew how he felt about you even if he’s never admitted it.
You softly sipped your tea, allowing the warm liquid to run down your throat and causing you to sigh. He stirred his own cup, watching the spoon go around and around. Technically, there was nothing else for you two to do in the kitchen. Technically, you could’ve parted ways right here and drank your own cups in your rooms. But you couldn’t bear to leave him. Deep down, you both didn’t want to be alone tonight.
“Bakugo?” He looked up as you said his name. “Could I sleep over in your room tonight? I don’t think I want to be alone”
All he did was scoff, pick up his mug and began walking towards the staircase. When he realized you weren’t following, he scowled and turned to look at you.
“Let’s go brat. I’m missing out on my beauty sleep”
Part two
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Ps: im starting to do requests! So if you have an idea for me, go ahead and put it in my asks <3
#boko no hero academia#bakugo x black reader#mha#mha fic#bnha x reader#katsuki bakugo mha#mha headcanons#bnha bakugo katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo x reader#katsuki x y/n#mha katsuki bakugo#katsuki bakugo fluff#katsuki x reader#bakugo katsuki#bakugou katsuki#bakugo katuski#bnha bakugou#bakugou x reader#mha bakugou#bakugo x y/n#bakugo x you#bakugo x reader fluff#my hero academy fanfiction#my hero acedamia#my hero academia fic#my hero academia fanfic#my hero academia#bakugo fic#bakugo fanfic
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