#Lucifer has no place that wants him aside from Hell and the demons are a constant reminder of his fall they were the sin that triggered it

[19catsncounting]

Hey does anyone still think about the thematic differences between Supernatural and the Wayward Sisters and how self-isolating male hunters are compared to community-building female hunters and how this was shown from the Harvelles to even arguably Missouri Mosely and even Samuel Campbell who is his daughter's father almost more than a man himself (especially in Season 6) is not immune to this?

And how the Wayward Sisters could have been built not on sacrificing yourself to this singular all-consuming relationship with your brother and sacrificing yourself for the world second or in name only, but instead on what it takes to cut yourself into useful and digestible pieces for the sake of keeping your place in that community because you're almost certain that it's This Community or Solitude Forever (Alex you can never escape the life no matter how much you don't want it you've gotta pitch in do you want your family to die on this hunt Claire you know you'll never find anyone to love you unless you make yourself softer and then are they really loving you are you even worthy of love anymore Jody your husband and son would still be alive if you listened and learned you can't lose another child in every sense you can't quite let your children be defenseless children either and you know so well how sick this fear makes you and how you're dealing with it the wrong way your son got to be a child but your daughters can't be that vulnerable Even Donna you have Your Role to play here you're not good enough as a hunter but you're funny and happy and you don't take up that much space so that's exactly how much space you're given to exist in).

And yes, a lot of these things are echoes of Kripke Supernatural but instead of too-intimate and dark and quiet confessions that the Winchesters share and know that no one else could ever have the context to fully understand it's Community it's All Our Problems the humiliation and shame is all-encompassing because there is no privacy Everyone Sees You Everyone Knows You Everyone Wants To Fix Help You.

[koolades-world]

Demons and Humans not understanding each other

Inspired by several other posts I read about this same thing <3 honestly even if the brothers insisted it was safe, I would consult Satan, Lucifer or Barbatos

this is mostly mammon freaking out

Humans think the deadliest things are like, adorable, like Cerberus. Mammon especially does not understand why Mc wants to run towards the very dangerous, very mad three headed dog. A few times he has had to throw Mc over his shoulder to keep them from staying behind

“MC CERBERUS BEING THE BEST BOY DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS HE WANTS TO KILL US”

“But he’s so cute! He just needs a snuggle buddy”

Humans can also be very stubborn if they’re too hot or cold but refuse to admit it. It’s fine with Lucifer does it because he’s one of the most powerful and therefore resilient demons in Hell, but not so much when Mc does it. Beel and Mammon love playing in the Devildom snow, but given that it’s the Devildom, it’s definitely a lot colder than it is in the human realm. Even after ten layers, Mc is still freezing but refuses to admit it.

“Mc, are ya shivering? I thought ya would be too warm under all that”

“I’m sweating with this one jacket”

“I’ll live! Let’s go back to the snowman”

“no I don’t think you will”

On the same note, sometimes demons forget humans can’t withstand crazy temperatures. Asmo will invite Mc to a popular bathhouse, sauna or hot springs, forgetting that the temperature would literally boil Mc alive

“Hey Asmo this is the place you wanted to go, right?”

“Yes! Isn’t is cute?”

“Everything except the part where I boil alive”

“what!”

Some foods can kill humans just by being near them so imagine how the brother would feel when they learned this, it’s giving that lunatic pudding incident with Diavolo from that one card

“Mc! You’ll love this. Open wide!”

“Asmo I feel funny”

“DO NOT FEED MC THE TAKEOUT LUCIFER SAID ITS DEADLY FOR HUMANS IN LARGE AMOUNTS”

“FUCK NOT AGAIN”

In retrospect, humans probably sleep a lot compared to demons. Some demons probably don’t sleep at all, except Sloth demons. Setting aside about eight to nine hours of the day just to sit idly might not make sense to them until they learn they will shut down without it

“How are you feeling about the exam we just took? Exam week is finally over.”

“Mc? Mc, Satan is talking to you. Why are you on the floor”

“MY HUMAN IS DEAD”

“No, I think they’re just asleep idiot”

“oh. wait, THEYRE ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALL lucifer is gonna kill me”

I’d say both demons and humans are social creatures, but humans will go insane without social interaction. Yeah a demon would probably be upset if they didn’t talk to someone for thousands of years but I don’t think a human could last more than ten without losing grip on reality. Humans tend to copy each other, which is probably bizarre to demons. Humans don’t even understand yawning so demons definitely won’t

Going back to the food thing, demons can probably go ages without eating, besides Gluttony demons. Humans need to eat so frequently compared to them

“So you’re tellin’ me that if Mc doesn’t eat for a whole week, their insides start to eat themselves?!”

“Yes. But, Mc ate a few hours ago.”

(Mammon was already gone when Satan turned back around)

Demons probably also play game that would definitely kill humans. My brother and I used to play crazy games when we were little (our favorite game didn’t have a name but we would put Barbies in the toy train tracks and see what would happen when different Thomas and friends character would hit her. The train tracks would glow in the dark! I did not let him put my favorite doll in the train track and he had to listen since I was the older one, she was not a barbie and had bendy feet? that’s not for now) but we never seriously got at each other throats. I cannot imagine what games demons and demon children must play. Satan was born fully grown but imagine if he was born little and the brothers had to play his favorite games with him. I feel like they would find the Barbie game I played a little weird too. Like, they would probably tell me that I should’ve done it in real life since that would be better experience or something batshit like that

“Aww, Satan, do you remember all the times we played “Five minute eye stab” with Lucifer? You were so cute. Sometimes I think Luci let you win.”

“Do not talk to me Asmodeus.”

“I’m sorry, you played what?”

“One time we gave him an actual knife by accident and since he was good, he ended up stabbing Lucifer’s eye.”

“You’ll be next if you don’t shut up and let me read”

“HE WHAT”

“Oh he’s fine now, clearly. Only took him a few hundred years to regain normal eye functions”

“Can we not talk about this anymore?”

Babe it is a miracle Mc is still alive

[lxkeee]

Helloo, I was wondering if it was alright for u to write a lucifer x male reader where the reader is also a powerful demon and goes with lucifer to visit Charlie in the dad beat dad episode, and Charlie is just like OMG i have two dads now, this is awesome

if u don't write for male reader, then feel free to change or ignore this lol

MY GAYDAR IS NEVER WRONG!

—Lucifer Morningstar x m! Reader

warnings: mentions of s*icide.

When Charlie called Lucifer, he was excited that his daughter wanted to invite him to see the hotel. He thought he would be able to handle it.

In fact, he did not.

The poor man had a complete mental breakdown as he over thought what would happen, how would he act around his daughter, what should he say, and etc.

So, he decided to ask for help and he just knows the right person for that.

His beloved boyfriend of one year, [y/n].

Backstory time,

Lucifer has been seeing and secretly dating the man for a year already, it took a while but he got charmed okay? [Y/n] is literally so charming, very handsome, very chivalrous.... And very tall...

And is a pianist.

Lucifer met [y/n] in a famous restaurant, that only elites or the rich can enter. [Y/n] so happens to own that restaurant.

The only reason he was there at that time was because the other seven deadly sins wanted to have a get together.

As the dinner with the other seven deadly sins progressed, Lucifer was enamored the whole night, his eyes staring at the tall and graceful man sitting in the middle of the restaurant as he played the piano for the guests so beautifully.

Asmodeus even teased him, making the king of hell blush.

That's where his frequent visit to the restaurant started.

Lucifer claims that he just wanted to listen to the man play and nothing else.

Of course, [y/n] noticed his frequent visits and decided to approach the smaller man.

Of course, Lucifer was cautious.

Lucifer was suspicious why the man looked more humane than others, aside from his sharp teeth.

Eventually, the two slowly got along and then slowly developed romantic feelings for each other.

They started telling each other their stories too.

Lucifer found out [y/n] was a pianist when he was still alive, he was born in the 1920's and died in 1945.

[Y/n] died as passionless artist, who lost his inspiration and will to live.

But despite all that, [y/n] managed to find his passion for music again in hell and despite the era he was born in, he managed to go with the flow of time.

Yes, he knows gen z slang 😭

He's got serious problems when it comes to saying "lmao" "purr" and "slay"

Anyways, after finding out and realizing why [y/n] is here is because the sin he committed is that he didn't appreciate the life was given to him and decided to take it away by his own hands.

Lucifer's caution around the man was gone and maybe, not all sinners are bad.

[y/n] confessed first and Lucifer reciprocated by giving the taller man a kiss (he had to pull down [y/n]'s tie okay?)

And Lucifer didn't regret it, [y/n] is a passionate lover. A green flag of all green flags.

“Why are you here? You're so nice, you shouldn't be here.”

“If I was up there, then I wouldn't have the pleasure of meeting you and calling you mine.” [y/n] said with a confused tone.

Unaware rizz.

This man, doesn't know how much his words affect Lucifer.

And the fact he can carry Lucifer bridal style and calls him his muse is the cherry on top.

Anyways, back to the scenario. I'm done with the backstory lmao

Lucifer decided to text [y/n] telling him about the situation, wanting emotional support as he's nervous going to an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar people.

He thought [y/n] wouldn't be able to come as the man got work but he was wrong as not 15 minutes later, [y/n] bursts through the door looking absolutely disheveled.

[y/n] ran like his life depended on it.

“My muse, I am hereeee...” the poor tall man wheezed out, hunched on his knees as he tried to catch his breath.

Lucifer had to help the man out by using his wings to dry him up.

“Better?”

“Better, thanks my love.”

Lucifer had to explain the situation to him on the way to the hotel and [y/n] giving him peptalk after.

After arriving at the hotel, [y/n] stayed at the side while he watched Lucifer interact with the others.

He swore he heard the pink arachnid say, “Is anyone's gaydar going off right now?”

“It's just you, Angel.” the gray haired girl says with a deadpan.

After Charlie introduced the rest, she noticed the taller male companion who came with her dad. The male was just admiring the interior of the hotel.

Tall, dark, and handsome.

“So... Dad, how about you introduce me to your friend that you brought over?” Charlie asked, making the two males flinch in surprise.

[y/n] giggling as he watched the flustered look on Lucifer's face.

The two males just looked at each other, having a silent conversation.

“Do you want to tell her?” is what [y/n]'s facial expression says based on the raised eyebrow.

“I guess it's time to tell her.” Lucifer says through his facial expression, as a sigh left his lips.

The others just stared in silence as the two males looked at each other in silent conversation.

“Charlie, this is [y/n]... My... Significant other.”

After Lucifer introduced the unknown man, Charlie's jaw dropped.

So did the other's.

The only thing Charlie can think is “Holy shit, I'll have two dads.”

“SEE?! I FUCKING TOLD YOU THAT MY GAYDAR IS POPPING OFF SINCE THEY ARRIVED”

It was a wild night. From the dad off, some loan sharks deciding to cause a mess. (Charlie has three dads now)

Do you guys want this as a series? I'm thinking of actually writing this concept because aihsjans it's so cutee and interesting 😭🤭

Also, I absolutely write for male readers as I myself is a man 🤭 aosjsi maybe I should write more Lucifer x male! Reader?

[another-lost-mc]

Can you imagine the om! cast flirting with mc and thinking they're mc's only romantic interest when mc already has a booty call at RAD? There are no feelings involved, just intimacy, but still. I think the cast is too arrogant to ever think mc could be interested in anyone else.

(English is not my native language, so please excuse any possible mistakes)

a/n: that’s fair! I mean, mc has needs too, right? maybe trying to hook up with one of the avatars is daunting, but a hot lower-ranking demon lord who promises a good time every once in a while? that could be fun.

➤ when they find out you have a fwb | the demon brothers

0.9k words | nsfw | suggestive | gn!reader

c/w: jealousy and implied dark themes/sketchy behaviour squints at beel and belphie

read more: the dateables | when solomon is your fwb

Lucifer finds it hard to believe at first. Once he knows the demon’s name, he watches you two interact more closely. He picks up on the shared glances and flirtatious touches he somehow missed before. He’s been stewing in his own desires and feelings for you all this time because he wasn’t sure the best way to declare his intentions. He thought subtlety and patience would be best, but perhaps he can admit just this once that he was mistaken. Learning about your dalliances with someone else finally gives him the push to show you what a real demon lover can offer you. Once you have the Avatar of Pride to warm your bed, you'll be satisfied with no one else but him.

Mammon is one part incredulous, one part jealous, and just a teensy bit turned on. He can’t stop staring at the blurry photo Asmo managed to take of you sneaking out of a utility closet at RAD. His cock twitches when he takes in the image of your rumpled clothes and the way your forehead glistens from a light sheen of sweat. He wants to make you look like that, not some random nobody that doesn't deserve you. His mind races when he imagines his own fingers tugging your clothes aside for better access to your naked body. What did you sound like when you tried to muffle your moans so no one would hear you? Mammon would give anything to take that demon’s place. Y’know, both of you have a spare period after lunch—would you follow him into one of the dark corners of RAD for a little fun if he offered? Maybe it’s time for him to find out.

Levi is seething. Mostly he’s angry and jealous and he wants to tear the building to pieces. He’s also ashamed because the fantasy of you dragging him into an empty room at RAD for a midday fuck is hot as hell. He doesn’t think he deserves you, but he knows that the demon you’re fucking doesn’t either. What do they have that he doesn’t? He’s burning with curiosity about your little affair, but he’s incensed by the idea that he might not be good enough for you. Envy can make him a little desperate. He's tempted to beg you for even a morsel of your love and affection. If he's pathetic enough, maybe you'll even take pity on him and oblige.

Satan is furious because he should’ve realized something was going on. The signs are all there and he missed them somehow. It takes all his willpower not to hunt down your little demon friend for daring to touch you that way. Satan is well-versed in human world literature—maybe declaring his intentions with a romantic gesture would convince you to give him a chance instead? Or maybe sweet and romantic love isn’t what you crave. If fast and rough is more to your tastes, all you need to do is mention your friend’s name—you’ll be too fucked out of your mind to remember it by the time he’s finished with you.

Asmo’s reactions are all over the place: he’s giddy that you’re so daring (fucking at RAD of all places!); he’s devastated that you turned to someone else instead of coming to him; and he’s frustrated that he didn’t realize sooner this was even happening. He pays more attention after he catches you the first time, and it seems so obvious when the current of lust between you and your friend flickers with interest throughout the school day. He finds reasons to keep you two from sneaking off together and pretends he’s not jealous every time he interferes. Perhaps when you’re frustrated enough, he can finally entice you to join him for a little pampering session in his room. You seem so frustrated today! But don’t worry—he knows exactly what you need to loosen up.

Beel is one of the few demons that understands what hunger and starvation feels like. Sometimes you need to do whatever it takes to satisfy those cravings, even on a temporary basis. You’re important to him, and he cherishes your friendship. He’s hidden his true desires from you because he doesn’t want to risk losing control if he’s too hasty, too rough, or too demanding before you're ready to embrace being with someone like him. His love is all-consuming and you're a constant strain on his self-control. If you weren’t turning to someone else for affection, maybe he could be patient and satisfy his urges for you elsewhere. Now that he knows someone else has had a taste of you, he wants you even more. When he finally confesses his desire to be with you, he hopes for both your sakes that you feel the same.

Belphie lashes out with barbed insults and backhanded compliments to hide his own hurt and jealousy. You’re not that bad looking for a human, I guess it was only a matter of time before someone wanted to fuck you. Once he learns the truth about that demon you’ve been fooling around with, he’s suddenly glued to your hip like he can’t stand to be parted from you. He’s selfish with your time and clings to you in his bed during naps. He sneaks his way into your dreams because he wants to make sure you’re not dreaming of anyone else. He might even have a private chat with your little friend, but he doesn’t tell you since it’s nothing for you to worry about. It’s a shame that your fuck buddy suddenly decides to call things off between you after that. At least you still have Belphie to comfort you and wipe away your tears. He appreciates you, even if that random asshole doesn’t—the only demon you ever needed has been here for you all along.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Angel, Husk, Alastor, and Pentious x kind!sinner reader

Prize 2/5 for @coldsushisworld !

Notes: they knew reader before they died, making it all the more shocking that they ended up in hell

ANGEL DUST

A mixture of shocked and angry on your behalf. He had overheard from charlie and Lucifer that heaven was strict, and you being here in hell seems to serve as proof. Similar to Husk, Angel makes sure that you dont get dragged into any nasty business. Asides from that, he shows you the ropes of how things work; around the pride ring as well as at the hotel. He confides in you about what's going on in his personal life, though it's not often. He knows you won't judge him for anything, but opening up is still tough. He firmly believes you can be redeemed, if redemption is possible.. after all none of the characters in Hell seem to know what happened to Pentious... theres mixed feelings there, on one hand he wants you to get access to a better place but on the other hes going to miss you. Its selfish, and in a way he starts to pregame the grieving if that makes sense...

HUSK

It deepens his lack of optimism about.. everything really. Out of all the people he knew in his life, you deserved to ascend more than them all. The fact that you're here feels like a punch to the gut. Husk surrounded himself with a lot of people in his life, and in death as well; his belief that the universe isnt fair is cemented. Even still it's nice having a familiar face wandering around. He keeps you filled in on what's going on at the hotel, and hea very adamant that you keep away from sinister characters like Alastor. He doesn't want you to be dragged down into anything... terrible..

ALASTOR

Intruigied but vaguely amused. He already believes that sinners cannot be redeemed so hes not betting much on your redemption. It's nothing against you of course, its just his beliefs in general. When he has the time he does make sure to catch up with you, even jokingly asking if you've gotten meaner since you've died. Conquered any territory during a turf war? Yet any contracts? You still have ownership of your soul, right? Hes fairly sweet and affectionate with you, similarly to how he acts with Mimzy and Rosie. He doesnt have much time to spend with you, however..but anytime there is, you're both left with a good time! Being friends with the radio demon does have its perks, especially when you're too good natured to fight anyone...

SIR PENTIOUS

Confused, mostly. He is happy that you're here, because that means he has a friend down here in Hell. But hes also a little mad at the universe for condemning you. He has a reaction similar to Husk, actually. Even when he gets over the initial shock hes still a little sour about your situation, though its quickly put to the side when you propose hanging out with him.. oh my god please spend time with him he hardly ever gets the excuse to be friends- "besties" as people say nowadays- with other people. Hes lonely and it really shows in your early interactions after reuniting. If this is prior to him joining the hotel he tries to rope you into the turf wars, insisting that power and control is the way to go here in Hell. He promises to share with you, though he never... gets any influence...

[arachniee]

✰ The Arbiter of Justice.

Ex Situationship! Alastor x Female! Overlord Reader , Vox x Female! Overlord Reader, Lucifer x Female! Overlord Reader

₊˚✩彡 Summary: Famously known as hell's only demon that can break contracts between other sinners, you were very sought after by those who wish to free themselves from the wretched hands of their soul owners, much to the dismay (annoyance) of the other Overlords.

₊˚✩彡Notes: okay so, i know you're probably wondering why this came out faster than the parts of my other series, lets just say that i absolutely despised the first drafts i had and had to redo and edit some stuff again, but hey, here you go (this is not proofread, you have been warned)

╰⪼ “Those fuckers are back!”

Vox yelled, flailing his arms out with each syllable that left his petty mouth. Great. First, he found out that the radio demon was back from whatever hole in hell he's been hiding in for the last 7 years, and second, that bitch in the shadows made her appearance again after a whole decade! God, isn't his life just fucking great.

Valentino wanted to snicker, mock him because of his childishness. But he couldn't, for he too was not pleased with someone's return. Sure, he could live without Alastor, and yeah, he could live with the radio demon around. He didn't really care about him, it was only Vox who hated Alastor so much to obviously express it. But the Arbiter? Valentino would even thank any exorcist who manages to kill her. Though, he knew not to expect anything. Since the Vee’s have never really laid a scratch on her skin, no matter what they did. 

“I thought she was gone for good too.”

It's been almost 10 years since she left, leaving the Vee’s to assume (hope) that she'd never return and potentially ruin their status. Ever since her sudden disappearance, they've made it their goal to savour this experience, the feeling of making as many contracts as possible without the restraint from that wretched woman who was dubbed the “Arbiter”.

“Can’t this day get any fucking worse?!” 

Vox was fuming, it was very prominent. Of course he'd be angry, a threat has been posed to his business. With the Arbiter’s return, surely he'll lose most of his employees again! And that is NOT happening. And to add to his already boiling anger, the radio demon is back as well. He could feel the temperature of his screen almost overloading, if he doesn't calm down soon, he might even crack his screen. 

It was only a matter of time ‘til the word reached Velvette, and they were sure that she would also be displeased with the news. All these deals and contracts they made to build themselves up, climb the ranks, all of these may potentially be snatched away by the Arbiter again in a matter of time. They can't afford for that to happen, not now, not again, not ever.

“The upcoming Overlord meeting… Are you going to attend?”

Valentino asked, eyebrows furrowed as he waited for Vox’s answer. His question was hinting a very obvious thought, with the return of the radio demon and the arbiter, surely almost every Overlord will be present. No, the Arbiter has never really attended the meeting personally, but they always send a shadow in their place. That's the most interaction a person has with her, aside from those who manage to successfully summon her and make a contract with her for her services. So attending the Overlord meeting and speaking with the shadow would be their only way of communicating with her. That is the only way they'll be able to receive some sort of response. 

Even with how problematic the Arbiter is for them, little to none is known about her. Every person whom she freed from a contract will always do and say the same thing. Their finger pressing to their lips, a eerily soft smile, and a gentle voice that would speak the words;

“Sh, her shadow might hear you!”

Well, that didn't fill up with any context. It was the same actions and answer, no matter how many times a demon would ask them. Did the Arbiter do something to them? Did they say something? Regardless, it was really frustrating. Especially to those who wanted to gather information about her to bring her down. Ehem, the Vee’s, and maybe a few other Overlords.

───〃★

Ever since your disappearance, Alastor and his dear friends were quite bummed (more so than he'd like to admit). And maybe because of the fact that he may favor you more than the others, who knows? But the pain you unknowingly left in his heart was a feeling he could never forget. A feeling he can’t seem to get himself past. Petty, call it as you will. But the memory you engraved in his mind kept him up all night, every night. You consumed him and his thoughts, especially in his sleep.

Which is why he wanted nothing more than to never sleep again.

Despite him not wanting to acknowledge it, he liked you far more than the rest. And he hated himself for it. No matter how hard he tried to avoid any indication of your presence, you still bled into every crevice and corner of this shitty hell hole. Every corner that touched the light and casted shadows, all of it haunted him.

Everything was so similar to you.

So he left. For the longest time, he tried his very best to forget you, spending his time doing who knows what. It has already been 7 years, before he knew it. He knew it was conflicting, but a part of his wretched soul wondered. 

Would you be there on his return?

Most likely not. He hoped that you wouldn’t. But he also hoped to see you, even just once. A single glance at you would’ve made him crumble. The wall that he built to keep romance away, it’ll all come crashing down, without a doubt. 

“Alastor? What’s botherin’ you, dear?” 

A feminine voice cut through the thick tension in the room, a gentle hand resting on his shoulder. Ah, he almost forgot he was in his dear friend’s Emporium. Well, it wasn’t entirely his fault his thoughts wandered off, especially after seeing a picture with a familiar face on it. 

“Oh, worry not, Dear Rosie! Nothing a little work can’t handle!’

He assured her, that wide, signature smile of his visibly staring back at the woman. She mirrored it, though she seemed a little less hostile, even with her razor sharp teeth. She had been worried since Alastor left, of course, but what worried her more was how she’d often find him in a daze, seemingly unaware of everything around. Now, in hell, being unaware of your surroundings is the last thing you want. It’s not like she was doubting his strength and power, oh no. But she really can’t help it. She’s often the one taking care of everyone, so naturally, she wants to be there for him out of instinct. 

“Well, it certainly doesn’t look like it, Cerf.”

A husky voice piped in, peeking from behind the couch that Rosie and the radio demon sat on. Another figure, who seemingly appeared to be a more masculine version of the Cannibal District’s leader. Same pitch black eyes, pale skin and mop of greyish pink stands. Adorned with a rather lavish suit and a light colored fedora that contrasted Rosie’s more pinkish hat. 

“As sharp as always, I see you are!”

“Oh come on, pumpkin! We gotta give Alastor his own personal space, okay? If he doesn’t wanna talk about it then we won’t force him.” 

Rosie interrupted, glancing behind her to finally eye the person that the voice belonged to. The previous smile on her face seemed to grow, of course, why wouldn’t it? Looking at her younger brother has always been pleasing to her, especially since they look too much alike.

“I am well aware, my Rosa. Must you always treat me as an unknowing child?” 

Her younger brother sighed, momentarily closing his eyes and shaking his head left and right, his greyish pink locks swaying with each movement. 

“But my dear, it seems that you are!” 

The radio demon replied to his question. This was one of the ways Alastor tried, in hopes of forgetting you. Spending time with his dearest friends was something he cherished, especially with how much he saw that they genuinely cared for him. But it was a bittersweet feeling. 

How differently would things be if you were still here?

“Word has it that she has finally returned.” 

The same figure from behind the two seated Overlords exclaimed, tone now an octave lower and stirring with an unknowing emotion. Was he trying to be cautious? Or was he trying to not be insensitive towards Alastor’s feelings? Well, whatever the reason, this topic was bound to surface in their conversations anytime soon, so might as well talk about it now.

“My Riose, that is not something you must bring up so suddenly!” 

The said young man let out a huff of air, out of amusement or interest, not quite sure. Gosh, he certainly is still like a child in the two Overlords’ eyes. With a shrug, Riose decided to change the topic. Man, he was expecting to hear more stories about the Arbiter, but that can wait another time perhaps. Once the radio demon has fully moved on, he supposed. 

Alastor knew you were back, he has connections after all. But he hated how he hoped so much that you’d meet again, after all these years. But that was closer to impossible, to be honest. He’s accepted that fact, not fully, but he’s trying. Trying to move on, trying to forget you.

Though Riose had a feeling that he’d share this stuff with you and tell you about the shit the radio demon has been ranting to him and his sister, and unfortunately, you don’t know if you want to let Alastor go yet.

[flower-boi16]

Hellaverse's World Building Problems (100 Follower Special!)

World-building is one of the most important things in any fantasy show, it fleshes out the setting the characters live in and tells you how things work. Unfortunately, Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss have several issues when it comes to they're world-building that harm both series and in this post, I'm going to discuss them.

1. Obsession with Pride

An issue I have with Hellaverse's world-building is that, for some reason, sinners aren't allowed in any other ring outside of the pride ring. So, this creates a few problems. The first is that Hazbin Hotel can now only use one setting rather than the other six it has because the characters are forced to be stuck there, so we'll have to use the same exact setting in a world with six more.

This wouldn't be such a problem if it weren't for the fact that the pride ring itself is an extremely boring setting, it just looks like our world except red, and there's nothing unique or interesting about it aside from there being demons there.

The only place in the pride ring that has any potential to be interesting is cannibal town, and even then, it just looks like a normal town, there isn't exactly any cannibalization in it to be seen.

The other rings at least have interesting themes to them that make them distinct from each other, the pride ring is just some boring city painted in red. Then there's the issue of why sinners are even kept in the pride ring at all?

I'll go into this more later but the hierarchy in hell is very inconsistent at times. Imps are supposed to be lower class than sinners yet they have access to all the rings while sinners can only be in one. So why would Lucifer keep the sinners in the pride ring and only in the pride ring? The show doesn't bother giving an explanation for this at all.

I've seen the argument go around that it makes the exorcists do their job more effectively which while does make sense...it also doesn't exactly do very well for Lucifer as a character if he intentionally kept his own people in one ring so killing them would be easier. It loses a lot of sympathy points for him for me.

Besides, the show itself still needs to explain these plot holes rather than forcing fans to make fan theories over it. Seriously, I searched this question up on Google and I found so many people asking this, and all of the responses to the posts were people just making educated guesses because the show itself never bothered to actually EXPLAIN this.

So it's not even all of Hell having an overpopulation problem, it's just the pride ring specifically because sinners are confined there forever. If Charlie wants to solve Hell's overpopulation problem, why not ask her daddy to let sinners into other rings? (Assuming she doesn't know the actual reason why Heaven does this which totally does create serious issues with the show) Again, it's just the pride ring having an overpopulation problem, not all of Hell, so why Charlie never figured this out is beyond me.

But confining the characters to the pride ring creates more issues than just that, because now the show can't flesh out the other rings because it forces the characters to be stuck in just one.

So, you get the next issue with Hellaverse's world-building...

2. Packing World Building in a spin-off

Because Hazbin Hotel can't flesh out its world itself, it needs to rely on its spin-off, Helluva Boss, to flesh it out instead. This becomes a problem when you look at Hazbin as a stand-alone show separate from Helluva Boss; if you did not watch Helluva Boss, Hazbin's world-building would come across as fairly underdeveloped due to the characters being confined to one ring, so the other rings wouldn't get much fleshing out or development causing Hell as a setting to feel underdeveloped.

Hazbin Hotel is the main series of Hellaverse, it should be able to stand on its own as a stand-alone show and should not need a spin-off to flesh out its world-building. A new viewer should not have to watch a spin-off show to get more out of the main show's world-building, the main show should've fleshed out its world itself rather than rely on a spin-off for it.

This is why confining the characters to just the pride ring is a bad idea, the show can't flesh out its world now and it has to rely on a spin-off series to do that, so in order for a new viewer to experience more of the other rings, they would need to watch a spin-off show which is entirely supplemental material that one normally does not need to watch to understand things about a story.

Without HB, the other rings in Hazbin are very underexplored and underdeveloped, because we never get to see them or flesh them out. It needs to rely on its spin-off to flesh out its world, and that's bad because a spin-off is SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL. A viewer should not need to watch supplemental stuff to understand things about the main show, it should not be a required watch to get more of the world-building fleshed out.

Though, if anything, Helluva Boss just creates more world-building problems within the franchise, such as...

3. Hell's Hierarchy

So, in the Hazbin Hotel, there is a hierarchy in Hell. The order from most power to least is...

Lucifer

Charlie and Lilith

The Seven Deadly Sins

Ars Goetias

Overlords

Sinners

Hell Borns

Imps and Hell-Hounds

The problem here is that Hell's hierarchy is constantly ignored or broken by both of the shows. For example, Sinners and Overlords are confined to only the pride ring, meanwhile, Imps and Hell hounds, who are LOWER CLASS than Sinners and Overlords, are allowed to go to any ring that they like.

Then there's Beelzebub, whose mere existence causes issues. Let's get the obvious out of the way; why is a HELLHOUND one of the deadly sins when those are supposed to be just as lower class as imps? This could work if Beelzebub specifically had the least amount of power of the sins, but she doesn't.

FURTHERMORE, once we just ignore the fact that Beelzebub is a sin despite being a hellhound, we then have to open the can of worms that is her having a boyfriend who is also a hellhound, and...nobody cares about this?

I'm sorry, if a sin is perfectly allowed to date a hell hound in public, then why is it such a big deal when Stolas and Ozzie are caught fucking imps? Do the other sins not know about this??? Does Lucifer not know about this??? If so, why not??? Surely one of them being in a relationship with a hellhound would get they're attention...right?

And if they do know about this then again, why is it such a big deal that a Goetia Prince is sleeping with an imp and a sin, who is ABOVE HIM IN TERMS OF POWER, being in a relationship with a hellhound, who are just as if not MORE lower-class than imps, not? It's a confusing inconsistency.

Also, and I JUST REALIZED THIS, but what even happens when a sin or goetia is found out to be fucking an imp or hell hound? Seriously, what consequences does that sin or goetia even face? Stolas has been exposed for fucking Blitz ever since the end of season 1 yet he has received NO consequences at all, and like I said, Beezlebulb is allowed to be in a relationship with someone who is on the SAME LEVEL AS IMPS.

So why would Ozzie even need to hide his relationship with Fizz at all? What are the consequences for being in a relationship with a hellhound or imp? So far, there appears to be absolutely none! So why is it even that big of a deal when Stolas gets found out? Why does Ozzie need to hide his relationship with Fizz if there aren't going to be any consequences for it?

These plot holes hurt my BRAIN to think about. There is no consistency here, Hell's Hierarchy barely fucking matters in either of the shows, and characters higher up in the hierarchy are allowed to do SEVERAL things with lower classes and face no consequences despite the show trying to say they would. Oh, but all of what I just mentioned are just issues with HELL's world-building, now it's time to get into...

4. Heaven

I already talked about the problems with Heaven in the show so I won't dwell on the issues I've already talked about too much, however, Heaven still has many world-building issues like Hell does. For one, as I've already pointed out, we don't even know how Heaven even WORKS.

I already asked these questions before but like. How does one get into Heaven? What are the requirements for what make a good or bad person? We don't actually know and we never will because Heaven for SOME REASON doesn't have it's own criteria for what does or doesn't make a good person...

...WHY??!? Why don't they have this??? So how does one even GET into Heaven at all???? We have no idea of how Heaven works because the show never actually bothers putting in the effort to explain that.

Who even decides whether or not to get into Heaven??? Who is in charge of that??? Answer: We don't fucking know. Sera mentions the "divine judgment", which, after a quick Google search, says "the action of God's retributive justice by which the destiny of rational creatures is decided according to their merits and demerits"

So basically god decides who goes into Heaven or Hell, which would make sense...if it weren't for the fact, from what I've heard from other blogs...Viv said that god doesn't exist in HH or HB...so...

...divine judgment by WHO EXACTLY???? The lack of explanation of what does or doesn't get somebody into Heaven is made worse with Pentious getting into Heaven in the season finale.

I have already complained about this multiple times but like. HOW DID PENTIOUS GET INTO HEAVEN???? WHY DID HE GET INTO HEAVEN???????? He literally got killed by Adam! He should be a bunch of energy right out according to the wiki! Yet he makes it into Heaven anyway???? WHY????? The show never explains this at all! The only thing resembling a logical explanation I could find was on the wiki and even then the article was just speculating because again, the show didn't bother to actually explain this.

Viv. Can you PLEASE for the love of god (no pun intended) actually explain the rules of your world and its world-building? People should not have to create theories to patch up plot holes in your world-building, actually, EXPLAIN this shit for once.

Oh, and I'm still not done, because now there's the fact that the entirety of Heaven and most of Heaven's higher-ups except for Sera never knew of the exterminations, which creates MORE plot holes.

Did none of Heaven's citizens or other higher-ups question why the exorcists had BLOOD on them when they came back from Hell? Wouldn't have any of them put two and two together and think "Hey so they are probably killing people down there". Did none of them even question what was the point of the exorcists at all? How was Sera able to hide this stuff? Once again, the show doesn't answer ANY OF THIS.

Oh, and I'm STILL not done, because now, it's time to open the can of worms that apparently does not exist in this universe.....WHY?!?!? According to Google, the angels were created BY GOD. So, if he doesn't exist, how did the angels exist either? Who created them??? Heck, who even created HEAVEN ITSELF?????? Removing god from this universe creates so many issues and breaks the entire show. sigh, ok, I think that's enough....

5. Conclusion

So, Hellaverse's world-building has MANY issues. There are a lot of plot holes and thoughts about it that don't get answered, as well as hell itself, specifically the pride ring being incredibly boring visually. Not to mention a lot of the world-building is packed into a SPIN-OFF SHOW. So...ya, hope you liked my post, and thank y'all for 100 followers! So...bye.

[bloogers-boogers]

~Marriage au~ (part two)

So, I was drawing this post when the idea strikes me kabdksdhsls and now it’s a thing.

We all know the whole idea of Adam becoming a sinner, well that’s basically the start of the story. He becomes a sinner, he gets in the hotel, he manages to make a deal with Lucifer in exchange of his soul, BUT, that’s like way after. Why? Because in this au Adam soul was trapped to some random overlord, no, it’s not Alastor, Vox or Valentino. It’s somebody else just as powerful. The whole reason Adam gave his soul to him wasn’t outta free will, it was because this demon in peculiar has this ability to make people do things they don’t want to do (hypnosis?? Idk similar to Vox ig), which Adam was a victim of. He made Adam “willingly” exchange his soul for an offer. This was before he managed to get to the hotel. So now he’s trapped to this guy.

The only ones who can see Adam being chained are demons that are also on a leash that includes Alastor. And this is how Lucifer found out about it because he overheard Alastor taunt Adam about it with very subtle words but Lucifer caught on immediately.

Which is where the plot begins.

Lucifer takes Adam aside and starts making a huge deal about it which Adam refused to admit it was even true.

Somehow in the long run Lucifer managed to get Adam to blurt out the truth after many attempts to gain his trust or at least make Adam accept his help (didn’t take long tbh, kinda like 2 hours after the confrontation).

So they both went to talk to the demon who owned Adam and Lucifer wasn’t planning on leaving there until he managed to have Adam’s soul free. The bad thing was that this overlord was quite power hungry and the fact that the KING of hell seemed desperate for this soul alone was an opportunity he couldn’t let down (he kinda figured being the first man his soul would be priceless in comparison to other sinners which is why he caught him in the first place but he wouldn’t have guessed that King Morningstar would want it after the battle they had it was shown those two didn’t get along.) but anyways.

So he offered Adam’s soul for the exchange of Lucifer giving up on the throne which was laughable. Lucifer denied, obviously, and Adam just kinda accepted defeat. But Lucifer didn’t give up on that, they tried other methods from ancient scrolls to old rituals but nothing worked to set Adam’s soul free. Lucifer didn’t want to resort to this but he had no other choice by the looks of it. A soul contract is a very powerful thing which is why it’s almost unbreakable, but he was the king of hell. He had an immense power that COULD break a soul contract. But thats only if…

Adam spiritually gives himself to Lucifer in marriage in a holy union. Aka upon the eyes of God.

Which of course this is beyond breaking everything Lucifer stands for and his pride.

So this is where their deal commenced.

“Adam I will set you free, I will put my faith in God again to break that contract, my union with Lilith; everything I fought so hard to keep. I will sacrifice it all, myself, just for you to receive freedom again. But the only thing I ask for in exchange is your soul.”

“Seriously?! After literally everything we did to get myself free from that asshole you’re gonna get my soul stuck to you seconds after?! Speak of the fucking devil.”

“Adam for the love of my damn father! I’m literally sacrificing my marriage, connecting with my dad, throwing my pride away. Literally fucking marrying you! For a whole damn year! for your selfish underserving ass! I must get something back for it. Take it or leave it.”

Adam thought for a bit before shrugging. Yeah, it was a bitch, but it was unlikely for Lucifer to do something that bad when Charlie is involved in Adam’s self growth as a person.

“Okay. Deal,” he extends his hand towards Lucifer assuming it was a normal type of deal and the devil sigh.

Unfortunately for them, a holy marriage is supposed to be set in the tradicional terms.

He summoned a box with a golden serpent ring and kneeled down swallowing his pride and accepting Adam as his spouse.

“Adam, would you, the first man accept me; King Lucifer Morningstar as your faithful and loyal husband?”

This startled Adam of course, cause what the fuck was Lucifer doing.

Adam huffed incredulous, “Loyal I doubt it.”

Lucifer tsk sourly already regretting this but held it in. That could wait after their stupid church wedding.

“But sure, whatever…” Adam blushed embarrassed by the whole thing (after all he never experienced something like this before, a marriage proposal; considering he was already born married or given wives), offering his hand while Lucifer looked up a bit before his gaze fell back down to Adam’s fingers and gently slid the ring on his wedding finger.

Suddenly Lucifer and Adam appear in a church house with the grim reaper as their priest and the wedding begins.

“In the name of God, I, Lucifer Morningstar, take you, Adam, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death. This is my solemn vow."

Adam blushed some more, he wasn’t sure why he was being an emotional bitch about it when all of this wasn’t entirely willing but still, he was actually experiencing a wedding in the point of view of a groom.

Adam wasn’t sure what to say but to replicate Lucifer’s vows.

“In the name of God, I, Adam, take you, Lucifer Morninstar, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death. This is my solemn vow."

Lucifer bit his lip, feeling unsure all of a sudden. Was he really gonna do this just for Adam? He looked at his wedding band; the memories, the only thing he had left linked to Lilith. Once he accepts Adam as his, his ring would evaporate and his soul would forever be bounded to Adam.

He winced his eyes shut letting the reaper finish the ceremony.

“So I will repeat this again, in case someone is already rethinking this and wants to flee to the nearest exit which is right at the left end,” the grim reaper side eyes Lucifer, “Do you Lucifer Morningstar accept Adam to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do.”

“Do you Adam accept Lucifer Morningstar to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I-“

Adam also had his own doubts, his promises to Eve, the connection he once had for her, the faithful and love for the mother of his children. All of that smacked him in the face with each passing second of the ceremony. He hasn’t even thought of Eve in so long.

“I do.”

The reaper gestures Lucifer to give his ring.

Lucifer winced harder feeling a tear wanting to slip out as he starts.

“Adam, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit,” he slid the ring on Adam. Already sensing the ring that belonged to Lilith turning into dust as he stepped back, falling off his fingers ready to be replaced with Adam’s. Shit.

Adam was given a ring to place it on Lucifer’s wedding finger. He gulped, awkwardly getting ready for his part.

“Lucifer, I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit,” he places it on Lucifer’s finger, sealing their bound.

They both watched as the gold of their rings brightened and tightened in their skin.

“I here by declare you; Lucifer Morningstar and Adam Morningstar: king and king consort of hell. You may kiss the groom.”

Adam flinched disgusted, Lucifer cringed while swallowing and mustering the courage to peck Adam quickly.

And that sealed it. In the eyes of the holy spirit they were married. The holy light washed over them as the church bells rang announcing their strong union. Adam’s contract with the overlord broke as the power of their holy union broke it.

After Adam’s little scene of being set free from his contract was done, everything vanished and suddenly they were at a hotel room, lighted by candles and seductive music.

They both looked around, Adam confused, Lucifer just startled by the abruptness.

“Yeah. This is where things get awkward,” Lucifer admitted.

So a week passes and they act like all of that never happened. Everyone at the HOTEL was oblivious of the whole thing but eventually the news spreads around and Charlie finds out from a sinner.

“King Morningstar! Congratulations for your beautiful groom,” he then bows at both Adam and Lucifer.

Lucifer tenses when it happens and notices Charlie’s odd stare.

“I don’t know what he’s talking about, haha, he must be a little cookoo,” he swirls his finger next to his head, nervous. Adam just face palms by how awful Lucifer is at lying.

Of course Charlie doesn’t seem to believe his bullshit so Lucifer quits it.

“Okay, it’s not what you think and it’s absolutely TEMPORARY,” he explains in a quickly fashion, “Adam was trapped, I offered my help, the guy wanted the throne I denied. Only method to get Adam free was something more powerful than a soul contract and that was a holy marriage. And now, we’re married. Temporarily.”

Somehow, and as weird as it was, Charlie and the rest kinda swept it udder a rug. So the whole incident was kinda not a big deal (bc it’s not legit if they don’t actually like each other, still weird tho), both acted like normal and normally they’d just tried laughing off any comments about their marriage. Until it actually becomes a big deal.

When Lucifer starts feeling awkward or annoyed when someone approaches Adam with all intentions on trying to fuck him.

“AHAHA! Wowie! How fun, now get your filthy hands off my husband.”

And everytime Adam would question that, Lucifer would shrug it off as.

“I have to keep the part.”

You can imagine the drama, mix and confusing feelings and new found jealousy. And all of that in this.

So yeah. Thats the au 😭

[defectivevillain]

set your wings on fire

pairing: obey me! brothers & reader (can be platonic or romantic)

reader’s pronouns: he/him

Summary: The brothers react to you bringing a “friend” home.

lil disclaimer: the brothers are a bit manipulative here. then again, they are demons, after all. 

author’s note: the title is from cocoa hooves by glass animals cause I'm obsessed with it rn teehee

Lucifer

Lucifer greets your new friend with a polite smile and a firm handshake. There is no hint of any animosity or dislike anywhere in his posture. Everything about him screams calm, collected, and composed. 

His eyes, on the other hand... There’s a malicious gleam in his eyes that suggests that he will rip this guy apart if he so much as lays a finger on you. 

Lucifer makes sure to accidentally use his powers to obliterate a piece of trash he finds laying on the floor. The discarded piece of paper—which he has a nagging feeling Mammon just tossed there—is reduced to a pile of ashes. The floorboard where it rested is charred and blackened. Lucifer takes sufficient satisfaction in the slightly fearful expression on your new friend’s face. 

He’ll also interrupt the two of you several times throughout your little hang outs. Lucifer will stop by just to check in. As he does so, he makes sure to loom menacingly in the doorway—daring this new demon to try anything. 

Hell, sometimes Lucifer will just engineer excuses to get you out of the room and away from that friend of yours. He’ll make something up about Mammon getting into a fight with Levi over his credit card—which, honestly, isn’t entirely out of the realm of possibilities anyway—and you’ll be distanced from that meddlesome lowly demon before you know it.

Lucifer won’t brag about himself or boast about his achievements in the way some of his brothers are wont to do. He’s too prideful for that; he’s above that kind of behavior. Instead, the Avatar of Pride will aim a critical stare at this friend of yours. The oldest brother’s mere existence outclasses this random guy—a fact he is sure to remind the worm of.  

Mammon

Mammon digs his nails into his palms and resists the extremely compelling urge to slice this demon in half. He refuses to believe that some upstart can waltz into the House of Lamentations and talk to you, his human. 

He’s always casually slipping in suggestions about expensive things to do and places to go, just to establish his superiority over the guy. Mammon will ask him if he’s ever been to a restaurant that is notorious for being extremely expensive in the Devildom. Your demon friend will deny ever going there and Mammon will casually mention how he’s friends with the owner. The Avatar of Greed will look for outlets in the conversation and strike viciously, until the demon is left feeling humiliated and outclassed.

Although, that’s not to say that Mammon is always cunning and thoughtful. Sometimes, he’ll resort to simply sticking to you like glue. He’ll be constantly touching you—throwing an arm around your shoulders, clasping your hand in his, patting your head. You’re always a bit thrown off whenever he does those sorts of things, but the slight pinkness to his cheeks tells you that he doesn’t have malicious intentions. 

You’re certain you’ve never seen Mammon showboat as much as he does whenever your friend is around. You want to confront him about it, but you know it won’t get you anywhere. 

One day, Mammon pulls you aside and takes a deep breath. He seems uncharacteristically nervous, in your eyes. The demon averts his eyes as he starts to speak. “Human, don’t even think about making a pact with that guy.”

Of course, “that guy” is super vague, so you have to ask him for clarification. The Avatar of Greed groans in annoyance. “The guy. You know. Your new friend or whatever.” Once you finally catch on, you throw him a disbelieving glance. For once, Mammon isn’t flustered at being caught. His expression is dead serious. You agree at once, not liking the sharp glint in his eyes. 

Leviathan

Leviathan becomes rather snappy and irritated. He’s quick to murmur insults under his breath or make derogatory comments about the guy. 

He is the Avatar of Envy, after all. Levi will be positively smoldering at the thought of this random demon successfully gaining your attention. What does this guy have that he doesn’t?! The very thought refuses to leave his mind.

Leviathan will try to play some games to keep his mind off of the thought, but he simply can’t distract himself. He’s just mindlessly playing, to the point where he finds himself staring at the in-game avatar’s death screen for a few minutes before processing that he died. 

After that rather embarrassing failure, Levi gives up on feigning disinterest and decides to hang around you [and, by extension, this new friend of yours]. He asks the guy questions about video games he’s claimed to play, making sure to disprove him at every turn. Leviathan will make comments like: “Oh, you said that was your favorite game? Interesting. I don’t remember the antagonist dying in that one... Perhaps it really isn’t your favorite.” 

Levi will take any chance he gets to knock this other demon down several pedestals. Fortunately, it isn’t exactly hard—the guy is kind of stupid. At least, that’s what Leviathan thinks. You don’t seem to mind that, annoyingly enough.

[One time, you even come across Levi staring off into space and muttering something about incompetent normies. You don't think much of it at the time and Levi doesn’t mention it again.] 

Maybe, if Leviathan is feeling particularly annoyed and frustrated, he’ll pull your friend aside and glare at him. Levi will transform into his demon form and look down at the guy, a disgusted expression on his face. “Just what does he see in you?” He’ll say, with nothing but contempt in his voice. 

Satan

Satan is a complete and utter asshole to this new demon, point blank. He doesn't desire to make friends with him, doesn’t desire to even pretend that he can tolerate him. No, when Satan sees this demon practically hanging off your arm, he immediately wants to make his life absolutely miserable. 

So, that’s what he does. Sometimes, Satan will purposefully rip up one of the floorboards, just to get your new friend to trip. Other times, he’ll manipulate the air temperature in the room you’re occupying—just so he can walk in with a sweater or an ice pack for you before your friend can. 

Satan makes sure to maintain his composure whenever you’re around. The moment you’re not present, however, he’s quick to snap. He’ll clench his fists and just scream, grabbing the closest object and throwing it at the wall. Thankfully, his brothers are far accustomed to his rage fits and they don’t bother to intervene. Satan goes to the secret alcove behind his bedroom—his rage room, as he likes to call it—and doesn’t exit for an hour.

You will never notice Satan’s wrath unless he wants you to. He’s experienced and powerful enough to know how to hide his feelings, even when they threaten to swallow him whole. Your new demon friend will certainly notice—as he’s on the receiving end of Satan’s anger—but you will not. 

Satan is all about pretense. He’ll be sickly sweet to the guy when you’re around. When you’re not around... Safe to say, your new friend doesn’t know what’s coming. 

Asmodeus

Asmodeus walks over to your room, fully intent on kidnapping you for a shopping trip, when he meets eyes with another demon. He stares at the stranger for a few seconds before looking around the room to find you. You get up and wave at him.

“Who’s your friend?” Asmodeus asks casually. He's not quite sure if he’s displaying tranquility, because he feels as if he’s shaking in frustration and anger. Why would you need another demon to talk to? He's right here, after all. Ugh. Even his mediocre brothers are better than this random guy. Asmodeus’s thoughts must show on his face, because you raise an eyebrow at him in response. Silence stretches across the space before your new friend introduces himself.

The demon reaches out to shake his hand—quite uncommon for demons, Asmodeus thinks critically. The Avatar of Lust makes sure to accidentally swipe his hand and release a slight wave of magic. It’s far from a full display of his power, but it should be enough to convince this demon that he means business. Sure enough, your new friend shrinks back and looks away. Victory.

From then on, Asmodeus makes sure to walk by and lock eyes with the demon. Every time the guy is in the mansion, Asmo is conveniently around the corner or down the hall. [He knows you’re onto him, but he can't find it in himself to care.]

One notable instance, Asmodeus walks by to find the demon alone. You must be grabbing water or something. This is his chance! Asmodeus strolls over to the guy, glaring at him. “He’s my precious canvas,” Asmodeus whispers directly in his ear, content with how the demon flinches at the proximity. His fingers twitch to claw at the guy’s neck, but he resists the urge. “If you touch him, I will ruin you.” Asmodeus settles for dragging a sharp nail down the demon’s cheek. The Avatar of Lust takes satisfaction in the startled exhale that he lets out.

“Do we understand each other?” Asmodeus then asks cheerily. He doesn’t bother to wait for an answer, instead simply turning around and walking away.

Beelzebub

Beelzebub doesn’t quite understand the weird feeling in his chest when you introduce him to this demon friend of yours. Whatever it is, he doesn’t like it one bit. He especially doesn’t like the hunger in your friend’s eyes. 

Beelzebub isn’t super comfortable with people he doesn’t know, so he mostly sticks to himself. However, you and your friend will sometimes frequent the kitchen for a quick snack and, well, the kitchen is practically Beel’s second bedroom. He runs into the demon more times than he’d like. 

That other demon ruins his appetite, Beelzebub realizes. Whenever he sees the guy, he gets a strange churning feeling in his stomach. The Avatar of Gluttony doesn’t quite know what it means, other than the fact that he hates it. 

Sometimes, Beel will bake treats for you and just for you. He'll make sure to give them to you when your friend is present, before exclaiming that the baked goods are for you and only for you. You always throw him a confused look at that, but he doesn’t care. 

Beel is also fond of showing off his razor sharp teeth to this demon friend of yours. It’s amusing to see the guy clam up next to you, eyes wide as he looks at Beelzebub’s dangerous teeth. Beel always shoots him a sharp grin after that. 

One time, Beelzebub walks into the kitchen to find the two of you already sitting there. You’re quick to involve him in the conversation and, despite his gratitude, Beel can’t register anything except for annoyance. He blurts out the first thing he can think of. “I've never eaten another demon before...” Beelzebub frowns, looking your new friend up and down with hungry eyes. Of course, he’d never actually eat a demon—that’d be cannibalism. However, the remark incites a horrified reaction from your new friend and Beel has to mentally pat himself on the back for that one.

Belphegor

Belphegor despises your new friend from the moment he lays eyes on him. He loathes the guy’s mere existence. Everything about him just irks Belphegor. This demon tries way too hard and it makes him sick to his stomach. 

Whenever the demon tries to get your attention or make rather obvious moves, Belphegor will be right behind him, cruelly laughing at him. His amusement will key you into the fact that the guy is vying for your attention and failing. It’s just wonderful!

Belphegor soon finds that just taunting the guy isn’t enough. He contemplates killing him, but he knows that you’d never forgive him. The Avatar of Sloth then comes up with an idea. If he can’t take your meddlesome friend out of the equation, he’ll just take you out of it.

Belphegor won’t hurt you, of course. 

In fact, it’s comically easy to pull at your strings a bit—to fool your body into becoming more exhausted than normal. From there, well, it’s child’s play. Belphegor will enter the room and make an offhanded comment about how you’re looking more tired than usual. He’ll escort you back to your room and then firmly tell your new acquaintance that you need time to rest. It’s a foolproof plan. Your friend can’t resist, lest he risk looking callous and heartless. Meanwhile, Belphegor can nap with you—alone and unbothered. He smirks to himself and ignores the questioning look you send him.

[sparkbeast20]

aside from obm lucifer, whb kings would sweep the floor with their obm counterparts

I love my demon brothers... But if I have to say...

Most of them sadly, maybe cause Solmare isn't using the demon brothers powers or they just slap *they cast a spell that solve the problem*

Note: Even though I believe that power scaling is a big components in battle/fights. I'm a truly believe in David and Goliath style of fighting. Where strength isn't everything you can outwit your opponent it just leans on how experience they are.

Let start, I'm open to debate with these.

WHB!Mammon has defense and OM!Mammon has speed. WHB!M can create a building around him or use his shield to protect him, OM!M has to be quick about it. Cause once shield is up or his protection, OM!M hope that WHB!M ran out of his power. Cause WHB!M has one of the best defenses.

WHB!Leviathan and OM!Leviathan is the closest I could see matching, both can summon monsters and both can survive being underwater.

WHB!Belphegor and OM!Belphegor, Hm... Sorry, Belphie. But have you seen Beleth's event where WHB!Belph place everyone what is close to a infinite tsukuyomi/Genjutsu and he turned into a three eye skeleton that shoot lasers. Though, WHB!Belph had said that he might be powerful but because of his sin. He won't fight as much. OM!Belphie has a chance if he attacks first.

WHB!Satan and OM!Satan, you might think that is a brain and brawns fight. But WHB!S knows his ways around a battle field, hell he lives to the fight and violent. I kinda think that OM!S has a chance if he can outsmart him with traps and curses. But OM!S has to deal with WHB!S devil form.

WHB!Asmodeus and WHB!Asmodeus... *Leaving out the they'll just fuck joke here* Both seem to have mind altering powers, however again WHB!A has experience in battles... *insert that one official pic of him fighting with his dick out.* OM!A might have fought in the celestial war, and I doubt that Asmo would fight him.

WHB!Beelzebub and OM!Beelzebub, OM!B has the strength and durability that can last a fight, so WHB!B has to outsmart him by using all his ability to tire him out.

These are my thought and I'll happy to hear from people's thought on the brothers vs Kings.

I've been think of these demons/devils fighting ever since Asmodeus from WHB was revealed, I want to do a second part of my om x whb fic.

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

angel being away on a mission pertaining to a demonic activity outbreak she was tasked with controlling and she comes home the next day still wounded bc she was attacked with a demon blade covered in satanic viper venom (I pulled that out of my ass but yeah ofc Lucifer would create his own supernatural species of snakes for the irony, kinda like how he created hell hounds), which takes longer to heal and demonrry is going insane because he can’t do anything about it.

Can’t help her heal faster because the venom was designed to nullify magic and has to run its own course. Can’t punish whoever is responsible because it would give them away. Can’t do anything but watch her suffer the couple days it takes her to fully recover.

So he’s forced to stew in his own anger and worry and spends the time tearing into punching bags relentlessly to air out his emotions, breaking blades into shrapnel from throwing them so hard during practice, waiting on her every need despite her protests, and feels like his chest is being torn open again whenever he helps her change her bandages because even though the damage is healing, it was a deep injury and looks ghastly. And even though she tries to hide it, he can see whenever she bites into her cheek to avoid showing the pain on her face because she doesn’t want to stress him out further.

He just can’t stop thinking about what could have happened if the blade had found a worst place instead of just grazing her side. How she could have died and there would have been nothing he could do about it. How he wouldn’t have even been able to say goodbye or mourn her properly because her body would have been taken to heaven for last rites. How he would have had to find out through Niall, of all people, if the angel put aside his own hatred and deemed him worthy of knowing. It’s no secret he despises Harry, and the only thing that keeps Niall from killing him on sight is their mutual love for his girlfriend. He’d probably withhold the truth just to spite him.

Harry eventually comes to the conclusion that if he ever lost her like that— so suddenly, so violently— he’d end up dead for good. He would wind up getting himself killed because the reality of the situation is he would have gone ballistic for revenge, regardless of the consequences.

[luceafarul-de-dimineata]

Tired dad!Lucifer AU - Part 2

(This was written before the Gamigin event, so there's a lot of OOC elements. Not proof read because checking is for losers)

Lucifer turns around annoyed and defeated and watches as Morax is playing with the children. It was a sort of rythm game that was alien to him, though all childish endeavors where unfamiliar for a being that never existed outside the age of 30.

Morax and the kids: A-ram-zam-zam A-ram-zam-zam guli guli guli ram-zam-zam

Lucifer: Stop hypnotising the demons, you know that hypnotheraphy is bullshit.

Morax: I'm not hynotising them, we're just playing. I actually got to learn their names. Come on guys, how about we show his Majesty Lucifer what you learned today!

All the kids say their names in unison which ends up sounding like a mess. Morax giggles and tells them in a soft voice

Morax: Come on, one at a time. Let's go from left to right.

Satan: I'm Satan.

Asmodeus: My name is Asmodeus, but you can call me by your name.

Lucifer: That song hasn't come out yet, so none of us understand the reference.

Mammon: My name is Mammon.

Beelzebub: What were we doing? (Mammon whispers in his ear something) ah! yeah! Beelzebub.

Leviathan: Leviathan, and you better remember it.

Morax: Of course we will, sweetie.

Leviathan: Don't ever call me that.

Belphegor: ...

Satan: His name is Belphegor, but since he arrived here, he's been sleeping.

Lucifer: I wish all of you were as quiet as him... or weren't born

Morax: Your majesty, don't say that in front of the children! That's why doors exist!

Morax pulls Lucifer aside and whispers to him

Morax: Your majesty, we should be kinder to them! They just started existing, they probably don't even know where the pancreas is. They look up to you the same way I have all my life...

Lucifer: Good point, I should probably change my parenting technique. The world doesn't need 6 more versions of you.

Morax: Because I'm your favourite and unique and unreplacable

Lucifer: Because I don't want them to be such papa-lapte as you.

When Morax pouted Lucifer added under his breath so Morax could barely hear it: And because you're unique.

Lucifer: Ok, now that we know eachother, we're going to look around the place so you may discover how wonderful hell is.

Satan: We already know how it looks like.

Lucifer: No you don't. Also, I'm the adult here, so you do as I say.

Leviathan rolls his eyes and hides in his coffin.

Leviathan: Wake me up when he dies brutally or something.

Beelzebub: Could you drink your own piss?

Asmodeus: You could. I've seen people do it.

Beelzebub: How does it taste?

Asmodeus: I... actually don't know that. Wanna try?

Lucifer: No no no! Nobody is drinking piss on my watch! You are going to be nice obedient children that I can forget about.

Asmodeus: I'll be as obedient as you want me to be, daddy.

Lucifer: For some reason, you saying it makes it feel disgusting.

Asmodeus: Making people nervous is my hobby.

Lucifer: Why can't you have a normal hobby like... sewing or singing?

Beelzebub with a bottle of piss in hand: Ok I did it, wanna take shots of it?

Lucifer takes the bottle and throws it away: You're not drinking eachother's piss!

Satan: Are we playing catch? I wanna play catch! Last to reach the bottle has to wake up Belphegor!

All the kids run after the bottle, including Morax. That leaves Lucifer as the only one left.

Satan: You have to wake up, Belphegor, loser! I didn't know angels were so slow!

Lucifer: You fucker... you mother fucker, I will beat the shit out of you! I'll whip some sense into you!

Satan laughs at Lucifer's empty threat before a load grumbaling sound breaks the tension.

Beelzebub: I'm hungry...

Morax: Oh, I could prepare something for you. Now, that reminds me, it's dinner time!

Satan snickers and stares at Lucifer as if provoking him.

Satan: You have to wake up Belphegor for dinner. If you menage to do that, then I'll consider listening to your orders.

Lucifer sighs and glares back: Why would I listen to someone like you?

Satan: Only strong people can see Belphegor awake and live to tell the tale. You have to prove that you're strong.

Lucifer: How do I know you're not lying?

Satan: What's lying?

All the devils looked confused at Lucifer who, in turn, looked confused back.

Lucifer: Ok, how hard could it be to wake that guy up?

[hiemaldesirae]

Swap AU:

Vox's Goetia (we need a name for him...umm because he's where Vox gets the extras for the fight against Heaven; got any ideas?) looks like a Griffin. He's got a Lion lower half and eagle upper half but his colors are shades of blue. (You see why Vox proposed that deal.)

The crew work on defense for days. Vox goes to Lucifer to ask about Angel weaknesses and informs him about Adam's threats against Charlie and the Hotel, and that's how the hotel crew gets informed of angel weaknesses. Lucifer tells, after all why should he keep Heaven's weakness a secret when they're coming for his daughter?

Vox then puts a big order of Angelic steel in for Carmine, paying extra to have it arrive early, which it does so he and Pentious can build turrets and drones to shoot down the exterminators. They have a blast.

Also: fun facts:

Vox's sensors and subconscious relax and recognize Alastor's scent as safe, even though Vox himself cannot smell anything. The sensor's database has recognized certain scents as family (Husk's, Vel's, Val's) lover's/husband's (Alastor's) little sister (Charlie's) my duck loving liege lord who might be my friend too? (Lucifer) the crazy exorcist chick whose now treating me with kid gloves--IT WAS ONE PANIC ATTACK! (Vaggie) Val's weird Spider who keeps taking photos and I know is stealing my shit (Angel Dust) The Best Little Engineer That Could (Sir Pentious) The Engineer's less then steller sidekicks 1-8 (Eggbois) the chick that keeps blowing up the wall (Cherri Bomb)

Angel Dust does do more then steal. He brings in Alastor's cooking to the Hotel, and Vox who does miss homemade jambalaya jumps at the chance to eat it. Vox just devours it. (Of course Angel lied and told him it was set aside for Niffty and Velvette for working so hard. He wasn't going to tell him Alastor had been waiting at the door of V-tower with the large Tupperware bowl with strict instructions that only Vox got what was inside.)

Vox actually turns in early--he'd been stressing out with Adam's threat laying over him and the thought of a true death coming for him hasn't sat well, but the warmth of good food made him sleepy and he goes to bed. He's barely asleep when Alastor joins him, gently petting his rabbit ears and murmuring his undying devotion to sleeping Vox's ears.

uhhh. drawing from the demons of the ars goetia grimoire, seir could work as a name? according to his description, seir can go to any place on earth in a matter of seconds to accomplish the will of the conjurer (possibly explaining how vox can use him for errands and such), and hes not a particularly evil demon. he's also a prince of hell, so that makes his and stolas' relation even closer since there seems to be only 7 of them in the ars goetia grimore

HAHAHA awww bonding time with pentious and vox!!! i still stand by the fact that i think vox should get to say kys to at least ONE other person in the swap au. i simply believe my wife should be allowed to cyberbully whoever he wants <3 also i imagine lucifer would show up to help with fortifications too, no? i just cant see him leaving his daughter and friend alone to deal with the fallout while not leaving the palace... though admittedly, i am a bit biased from what electric mentioned.

me after i die. HE STILL RECOGNIZES AL AS HIS LOVER...... auwgudawgh...... imgonna be SICK. what the HELL did they even fight about because clearly it wasnt enough to keep both of them from pining for each other... AUAUWGAHAH every time you come in my inbox its like another plane (angst( striking the twin towers (my heart)

and i am SUCH a fucking sucker for radiostatics love language being food. the idea that al nabs / has angel nab voxs stuff so that he can stake his claim but he also makes him food.... just stop being cryptic and TELL HIM YOUR SHIT !!! god i hate them. dysfunctional ass toxic couple theyre the WORST. and al. please for the love of god just be a Normal Person and STOP BREAKING INTO VOXS BED AT NIGHt ?!!?!?? just one normal thing from you. god damn its like if he doesnt act like a freak he loses 20 years off his lifespan or something

[obey-me-disaster]

(HEADCANON) I've actually been meaning to ask you this for a while!! But would Luci, Mammon, Satan, Asmo, Beel + The side characters be willing to adopt? Let's say Mc's completely infertile, but they want to start a family. Which brings the question: Would the children be either from the Devildom or from the Human Realm? Trust that I will be binge reading all of your posts after I send this ask

A/N:Sorry for the late reply, I have been sent to tumblr prison for a while so I couldn't receive asks and stuff like that.

This is more focused on where they adopt the kid from rather than raising a kid, so if you want something along those lines, feel free to send another request! ^-^

All of the characters x gn!MC adopting a kid

They basically adopted Luke already so I am sure all of them will be more than ok with adoption. 😭😭

Simeon is Luke's legal guardian so he would 100% be on board with getting another kid.

Mammon pretty much adopted a child back in the human world too.

The demon brothers despite not being related by blood still see eachother as a family(basically adopted each other as family).

Family is more than just blood relation to all of the characters, so I doubt adoption would be a problem. They will still see the kid as part of their family.

Now onto whatever they would adopt from the human world or somewhere else:

Both options are sad if you stay and think about it. Adopt a human kid and your partner has to see both you and their child die from old age. Adopt a demon child and you'll never really get the chance to see them grow and they will have to see their parents die.

Lucifer

Don't you two have Satan already as a child??

He is pretty tied to Devildom so he can't really leave and bringing a human kid around could be dangerous.

The relations between Devildom and human world did get better but he doesn't want to risk it so he would prefer to adopt from Devildom.

He is already looking after his brothers and Diavolo, so what is another one. Hell! The kid might be better behaved than them.

Since Satan got born out of Lucifer's wrath...does that mean Lucifer can make other demon spawns out of his emotions???

Mammon

He already takes care of a girl from the human world, you two might as well adopt her.

Since he isn't as tied down to Devildom as others so he doesn't have any problems with adopting from the human world and moving there. He is already pretty familiar with place.

I feel like he would want to adopt more from the human world because of the girl he took under his wing. But he doesn't have any real problems with a demon kid either and would love them all the same.

Leviathan

He is still an admiral right?? So I feel like he is still pretty tied to Devildom, even if his title is of no use.

Since he is more tied to Devildom you two are most likely to adopt from there too. But if you really want to adopt from the human world he won't argue about it. He will love and take care of the kid either way.

Satan

I feel like he would prefer a demon kid more because he is afraid of hurting a human kid by accident since they tend to be way more fragile than a demon child.

He is just as afraid of hurting a demon child too because of his wrath. He just doesn't want to be a failure of a dad.

There is also the fact that is part of the demon elite, so he is also a bit tied to Devildom. No way as much as others but still, it would make it difficult for him to adopt a kid from the human world with you.

Asmodeus

Look me in the eyes and tell me he doesn't have already a bunch of kids walking this earth both in the human world and Devildom maybe Celestial Realm as well

Jokes aside he doesn't have a preference about it, so it will be up to you to decide from where do you want to adopt.

You would think he wouldn't be able to really leave Devildom due to his fans but that's actually not a problem?? Somehow??

Beelzebub

He doesn't care about where the kid is from, it doesn't make that MUCH of a difference to him.

He will maybe want a human child just a little bit more so you could actually watch them grow. He feels like it wouldn't be fair to you to not be able to watch your child grow, even if that means he will have to watch both of you die from old age unless 👀👀👀

Belphegor

After the whole attic incident he finally could let himself love the human world again just as he did in his younger days. Because of that he might prefer a human child just a little bit more

At the same time, he doesn't feel like he shouldn't after hating humanity for such a long time. He has mixed feelings about either choice

Diavolo

Because he is the king of Devildom he will need to have a demon child. Personally he would also love to adopt from the human world too but he knows that it will not be possible.

There is also the fact that he can't leave Devildom to go stay and raise children in the human world and he would hate to bring a human child in Devildom until the relations between the two worlds are way better.

Barbatos

He has to stay by Diavolo's side in Devildom, so he is against adopting a child from the human world and bring them in a dangerous place for them.

If there comes a future where Devildom becomes a safer place for humans he might think of also adopting a child from the human world.

Solomon

At first it was a no brainer to think that a child from the human was the obvious answear but when you stay and think about it...he would also want a child with a longer life span.

He is really conflicted about it so he leaves the final choice up to you. Either choice would be ok.

Simeon

Is Luke not enough for the two of you?

I don't think this time will be between a child from Devildom or the human world but a kid from the Celestial Realm or human world.

Tho with how....complicated things are up in the Celestial Realm in general I think the more obvious choice would be to adopt from the human world.

SPOILERS FROM SEASON 4!!!

Since he became a human with a normal human life span, adopting a child from the human world is really the only sensible option at that point.

END OF SPOILERS!!

Mephistopheles

He is part of the nobility so even if he wanted to adopt a child from the human world he wouldn't really be able to due to his status

Friendly reminder that while he acts like an ass to everyone he has a big soft spot for kids, no matter the realm they come from! Idk how relevant is to the ask, but I think it's cute.

Thirteen

I guess every world is good to adopt a kid from??? She is a reaper, not really belonging to ONE specific realm. At least that's how the game shows it.

It's really up to MC to decide

Now I have this mental image of her having to lead both your soul and her kid's soul to wherever souls go to once both of you die :')

Raphael

Again, it's between Celestial Realm and human world. Just imagine how the Celestial Realm would react to an angel adopting a demon kid and bringing them to past the Heaven's gates.

Unlike Simeon who isn't as tied to Celestial Realm, he has to stay there and idk how much the Celestial Realm is willing to let a human child run around.

MC has been there once(twice practically...It's hard to explain without spoiling something from season 3) but still...better adopt an angel child.

MC is more likely to be allowed in the Celestial Realm than some human kid.

[hazbeans-for-thee]

Radioapple Week Day Three - Deal

Characters: Lucifer, Alastor, Alastor's shadow

Warnings: None

Word count: 796

Summary: A little mischievous shadow decides to pay Lucifer a visit upon Alastor's request. What might he find while he's there?

Alastor watched as Lucifer ducked into his room at the end of the hallway. His lip curled in slight annoyance as he huffed an irritated sigh.

That snake of a demon has been avoiding him nearly all week! What few jabs he has been able to thrown at the king were simply being laughed off or completely ignored! This was their game they played, and Lucifer was breaking the rules. He hummed in thought as he turned around, casting a shadow on the opposite wall that began to twitch with life. Maybe he could get some usefulness out of this mischief maker.

"Go and see what our majesty is busying himself with that is so much more important to him," Alastor commanded. The shadow's mouth glowed a bright green as it slipped onto the floor and underneath the bedroom door.

Inside his room, Lucifer was sitting on his workdesk, his legs crossed as he examined the duck in his hand. "I think that color is right..." he muttered as he tilted it in the light. It was painted a dark red shade, almost like the color of blood. After a few more moments of pondering, he scowled and tossed the duck aside- right into a pile of discarded pile of ducks colored in various shades and hues of red. He stuffed his face in his hands and groaned. "No, no, it's not right, none of these are right! How the hell am I supposed to even tell what color it's supposed to be! I can't just go and compare swatches or something, he'd know immediately what's going on! Why can't I just-"

Lucifer paused as he heard the sound of rustling. His tail suddenly appeared and swished behind him as his eyes darted around the room. "Alright, who's pulling the funny business?" he asked as he hopped down from the desk. "If this is some kind of prank, I'm not falling for it..." he quickly spun on his heel and came face to face with the moving shadow. He pointed at it, and a burst of gold magic erupted from his fingertips, causing the shadow to freeze in place when it was hit.

"Aha! Gotcha bitch!" he exclaimed as he stepped toward the shadow that was now stuck to the wall. "You're tall, dark and creepy's little buddy, yeah? I bet he sent you, didn't he?" The shadow scowled back in response. "Don't worry, I'm not gonna hurt you. In fact... I might need your assistance for a little project of mine. If you help out, and promise not to tell, I'll let you go. How's that sound?"

The shadow seemed to huff in annoyance before it nodded in agreement.

"Perfect!" Lucifer motioned to the pile of red ducks on the floor. "You see, I'm working on a little gift. It's a duck that plays a little song and can dance to it! Pre-programmed with five snippets of songs from the thirties! But I want it to match Alastor's red, and I've gone through at least a hundred prototypes, and I just don't feel like I've gotten the shade right. And since you're literally attached to the guy, you're the perfect one to ask!"

The shadow seemed to bristle a little with pride. Lucifer snapped his fingers, allowing it to escape momentarily from the wall but not from the room. It sunk down into the pile and rummaged around before producing a duck in its hand.

"That one looks good?" Lucifer asked, and the shadow nodded. "Much appreciated! Now, do you plan on telling Alastor about this?"

The shadow shook its head.

"No-?" Lucifer exclaimed in bewilderment. "What, do you want something else too?"

The shadow nodded and held out its hand, palm facing the floor. It took Lucifer a moment before he realized what it was asking for.

"Oh, you want a kiss on the hand...?" The shadow nodded once again, and Lucifer found a fond smile crossing his face. "Just like Alastor, always trying to pull a fast one on me." He took the shadow's hand in his own - it felt a little odd to be holding something that isn't supposed to be corporeal - and placed a small kiss on the back. "There, the deal is set."

The shadow grinned and made a motion of zipping its lips shut. Lucifer laughed and snapped his fingers again. "Alright, you're free to go." The shadow gave a salute before sinking out of the room.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"What the hell do you mean, 'he caught you'??"

The shadow's ears fell flat against it's head as it noddded.

Alastor groaned in frustration as he rubbed his temples with his fingers. "You choose the worst times to be incompetent."

While Alastor wasn't looking, the shadow's lips curled up into a grin.

[fullofbees]

@poopenfarten420: I've come across your Beelzebub lactation kink on ao3 and loved it so much it made me crawl back on my knees to hell itself (tumblr) to beg you for more. This time I'd like to see the MC actually get to milk him themselves!  Your writing is delightfully filthy, I'm looking forward to whatever else you'll write in the future! A/N: HELLO YES I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, I PROMISE I AM BACK AND WILL BE WRITING THAT GOOD GOOD SMUT

CW: Lactation kink (again), male breast milk, breast milk as lube (kinda), no penetration just hand stuff

»»----------► GN!Reader

It was hard to be around Beel for a while after the incident in the kitchen. In truth, everything had returned to normal. Classes continued, mayhem ensued, and Lucifer lectured in vain. Yet you couldn’t be in the same room as the sixth born without making a fool of yourself. 

Just this week alone, you have smacked into six doors, three tables, and nearly tripped down the academy’s stairs all because you can’t tear your eyes away from Beel. Your habitually organized notes have been abandoned for doodles of the demon. Textbooks have been left at home to free up space in your bag for his favorite snacks. You now attend every Fangol practice, annoying the cheerleaders when you whoop and holler whenever Beel scores. 

The others have noticed your infatuated behavior, but if any of them knew about your little dairy mishap, you’re thankful for their silence on the matter. You’d quite simply die if they tried to bring it up. You were embarrassed by your lovesick schoolgirl behavior, finding it mortifying how hot your cheeks burn with every quick glance, any lingering touch. Hells, even just the sound of his stomach grumbling would send a thrill through your body. 

Yet the demon has consumed your mind in its entirety. Beelzebub graces your dreams, and dominates your waking thoughts; you’re restless, easily distracted, and oh so fucking horny. Damn near every night since, you can be found touching yourself to the memory of his promise; you swear you can still taste him on your tongue. You wanted—no needed—to devour him. 

The only solace you’ve found is knowing that Beel is just as infatuated as you are. You’ve always had a close bond since you made your pact, but now, both of you are damn near inseparable. Even Belphegor has had to intervene, either kicking you out or dragging Beel back to their shared room, grumbling through lazy yawns about it being unfair.  

That doesn’t stop you and the sixth-born from sending each other texts. Many nights have you forgone sleep just to talk to him, heart fluttering in your chest every time you see the three dots appear. That didn’t last long though, as Lucifer and Satan decided to put aside their differences to create a curse that wouldn’t allow you to use your D.D.D. after a certain hour. At least jealousy was one thing they could agree on. 

You turn to your side, taking your frustration out on your blankets as you kick them into place. The alarm clock on the bedside table reads 23:58. You’ve been locked in your room since 9 PM, with Lucifer saying that you can ‘get used to it’ until your grades are back to normal.  

Yet, in an act of stupid defiance, you spent that time staring blankly at the ceiling. You tried to go to bed early, but your late nights sexting trysts have ruined your sleep schedule. Normally, you’d watch a video or listen to some music to fall asleep, but the curse has already infected your phone, making it impossible to use.  

Perhaps this was for the best. You needed to focus. 

Quiet knocks interrupt your pity party. You ignore them, figuring it’s the creaky floorboards of the old, haunted house.  

Until they sound again, though faster this time, and followed by a hushed call of your name.  

Immediately, you fling your blankets off your body, hissing when your feet meet cold floor. But you push through the discomfort on your tiptoes as you hurry to the door. 

You’d always recognize that voice.  

Your favorite gluttonous demon is leaning against the frame when you open the door, his normally fluffy hair bogged down to his skin by a thin sheen of sweat, and cheeks deliciously flushed. He visibly tenses when he meets your gaze, and even though Beel is twice your height, he turns his attention to the floor, blush deepening as if the wrong reaction will cut the gentle giant down.  

“Beel, what are you--” 

“I think... it’s time.” 

Though a flush creeps from the tip of your ears and down your neck, you wordlessly open the door wider and gesture for him to come inside. The demon shuffles into the room with a relieved smile. 

The weight of what’s about to happen has you momentarily pause, a whirlwind of nerves yet eagerness churning in your gut. You lock the door once it’s closed, a futile effort against your supernatural housemates, but it grants you some peace of mind as you make sense of your dizzying thoughts. 

You’re disturbed from your mind a second time by a low groan coming from behind you. When you turn, you see that Beelzebub has already made himself comfortable on your bed, palming his hardening cock through his pajama pants.   

It’s like a switch flipped, all your anxiety disappears amongst the yearning you’ve been keeping at bay. It isn’t long before you’re at his side, whispering praise as you press two fingers to his lips and then into his mouth. The groans he releases as he sucks on your digits reverberates through your body, and you shiver as goosebumps cover your skin. 

Beel’s happily compliant when you push a third finger into his mouth, doesn’t shy away from gagging when you slip a little too deep. You remove your drenched fingers, a trail of saliva connecting back to his lips as you admire the wetness.  

He whines when you tug on his bottoms, hips unsteady when he raises them so you can pull the material down. Teasing the tip of his cock with your spit-soaked fingers has him throwing his head back against your pillows.  

You take the time to admire the demon below you as he pants and whimpers under your touch. He wears a black muscle tank with the academy’s mascot on it, the logo faded and cracking from age. It’s what lies underneath the shirt that sends another hum of need between your thighs.  

Straining against the fabric are Beel’s pecs, so swollen with milk that it pulls the cloth taut. You can’t stop yourself from licking your lips as you realize that you’re finally going to be able to taste him again. Reaching forward, you press your fingers into his flesh, though hesitant and careful in case the muscle is too sore. 

The demon gasps, chest arching into your touch before releasing a shaky and pitiful whimper. 

“P-Please... so full...” He groans. You know he isn’t lying; a dark circle has formed on his shirt, damp and growing from such little stimulation.  

There’s something intoxicating about having the Avatar of Gluttony, a seemingly bottomless pit of a creature, mewling beneath you about being full. It sends a warm thrill through your body, and the excitement you feel comes to a head. Any remaining hesitancies are banished. It’s time to stop wasting time.  

You separate from Beel so that you can stand, and watch as he grits his teeth, a low growl rumbling from his chest. You can’t help the giggle that escapes you; he’s just so cute when he’s desperate.  

Beelzebub allows you to maneuver him without complaint, though his impatience grows every time you don’t touch him where he wants. Sitting behind him, you guide the demon to rest into your embrace, his head against your chest as you idly play with his hair. 

“Stroke yourself for me.” You command.  

He obeys, frantically taking hold of his cock. You watch with delight as he reduces himself to groans and whispered mutterings of ‘fuck’, hips bucking into his own fist.  

Hands slowly creep down his sides until they meet the edge of his tank, taking hold of the fabric and beginning an equally slow ascent. Inch by inch, you expose the warm skin of his torso, and again he whimpers when your hands brush against his nipples. 

“Open.” 

Beel’s lips part, tongue slightly sticking out; you believe he’s waiting for your fingers again. Instead, you push the bundled material of his shirt into his mouth, simply instructing, “Hold this for me.” 

None of the images your mind has conjured up could compare to the sight before you. A delectable blush spreads down the demon’s neck and chest, though the rosy hue is strongest around his pert and puffy nipples. Milk dribbles from the pec that you had pressed on earlier; the liquid rolls down his torso and you didn’t expect it settling in the lines of his abs to be so fucking hot.  

You need to see more. 

He is not shy with his moans, however muffled they may be, when you cup his pecs and eagerly squeeze them between your fingers. Milk springs forth in a steady stream before cascading down his torso, some joining the growing pool on his abdomen while the rest begins to drench the sheets below.  

The hand stroking his cock becomes erratic; he doesn’t even care that his hand is becoming soaked in his own lactate. It seems to spur him on, the liquid making it easier for his fingers to glide against the silken skin. You are a willing spectator in this moment, watching with awe as the demon before you loses himself completely.  

Tears stream down his face when he cums; you chastise yourself for imagining their salty flavor paired with the sweetness from his chest. Still, when he collapses against your chest, you see the pearly beads of his spend decorating his skin and mixing with his milk. And though your mind, or more likely your loins, tell you to reach out and taste the heady combination, you remind yourself to savor the moment. 

Beel’s cock has yet to soften, and it looks like you’ve barely made a dent in the swelling of his pecs. 

Your patience shall be rewarded greatly by the end of the night.

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