#because the 2 times i tried i failed
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fakecats · 10 months ago
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hey guys reminder i have an instagram if you want to see just art then go follow it
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silverwhittlingknife · 8 months ago
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So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
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No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
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1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
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2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
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3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
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4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
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5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
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6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
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7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
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8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
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9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
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10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
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11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
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12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
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13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
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14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
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15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
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16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have.  If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
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17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
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17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
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18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
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19) In my head he’s the responsible one.  (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
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20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
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21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
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22) I trust him.  When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
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23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
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24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
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25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
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TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
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#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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leblogreblog · 1 month ago
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Being a Cahir fan from the time before the show came out is so weird cause-
That's. That's litteraly a completely different character.
#each time i see cahir on screen i go 'look how they masacred my boy'#so to get out of the way the biggest differences#he wasnt anyone special in the nilfgaard or its army#hes just some son of a noble made officer that just so happened to be unknowingly responsibe for the most important mission of the war#and he didnt know ciri that long#in books he literally just 1) grabbed ciri 2) brought her out of the burning cintra 3) helped her wash up from the soot and grime#he didnt even exchange with her a single word because out of shock he straight up forgot how and when he woke up she was gone#and then he didn't see her for next five years#the fact that he even found her at all is multiple times described as one step away from a miracle#after failing to bring ciri and insulting the emperor in anger he was straight up inprisoned for few years and was supposed to be hanged#which he wasnt only because he was the only person alive that even knew how ciri looked and they needed him to find her#and then he was sent on a basically sucide mission which was equivalent of ozai sending zuko to find and capture the avatar#everyone knew it was a death sentence either from hands of the empire or people guarding the girl#also he didnt stop the scotiael on thanned#ciri killed all of them leaving cahir as the last of them#then when she tried to kill him she irreperably damaged his hand when he tried to stop her sword and then he begged her to not kill him#when asked for one reason why he reveals that he was the one to bring her out of the burning cintra and while doing so he closes his eyes#(of which ciri doesnt have any recollection besides nightmares about a black knight with wings on his helmet on horseback screaming)#after a while of not being struck he opens his eyes and ciri is gone by then and he passes out from relief and/or the blood loss#and only by then other group of scotiael came to him#after failing once again he is literally sent back in the casket (still alive just trapped in it for convinience) to be executed#the only reason he lives on is because geralt later on accidentally finds him and then frees him#then he has lots of character building that i wont spoil anymore that is straigh up not possible with how the show went on#im just really disappointed#cahir mawr dyffryn aep ceallach#the witcher#the witcher books#the witcher netflix#also in books hes described (by geralt nonetheless) as being less than 25 years old/10 years older than ciri during 'babtism of fire'#my post
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brittlebutch · 11 months ago
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actually it's kind of funny how people will say Alex's fatal flaw is that he 'doesn't ask for help' and that it's his determination to handle things on his own that leads to his deterioration and eventual death when his whole introduction to the present-day timeline was a very literal cry for help that simply went ignored
#N posts stuff#like even if you think alex was lying throughout the entirety of season 2 and he was waiting from the Moment jay showed up#JUST to kill him (Which again i don't think makes much sense when he could have killed Tim & Jay immediately instead of#breaking Tim's leg. anyway) EVEN IF alex spent that whole time lying it doesn't actually change the fact that he would have at least#been Pretending to Ask For Help and if he wasn't lying then he was Literally Asking For Help and it doesn't Actually matter#what intention Alex had because the text is Ambiguous about Alex's honesty during season two; what isn't ambiguous is the way#other characters (specifically Jay) respond to him; like yeah - S2 Brian/Tim were never in one million years going to help Alex with shit#so sort of any argument that brings up Tim as someone who asks for/offers help is borderline meaningless in this era of the series#Jay had the 'opportunity' to help Alex (and i'll get back to that in a sec) but DIDN'T - Jay wasn't Interested in actually offering Alex#'help' bc Jay is ultimately curious about Answers and 'Offering Help' and 'Getting Answers' are two Wildly conflicting goals#Jay thinks Alex has answers and when Alex doesn't Offer these 'Answers' to Jay on a silver platter Jay gets pissed off and paranoid#and starts Stalking Alex bc he thinks it's 'Suspicious' that Alex won't give him the Answers (that Alex probably doesn't Actually have)#ANYWAY. ultimately this post is about how it's absurd when people argue#that individual character choices could have made a difference in the way this series played out - specifically wrt Alex#because EVERYONE in this WHOLE series are being affected by influences outside of their control ; including Brian Tim and Jay#so it's silly when people are like 'if ALEX had just made a different choice For Himself this could have all been avoided' WRONG.#bc Ultimately there's not really a way to 'help' someone else out of this situation - Tim tried and failed Repeatedly#the comics proved he even failed with Jessica - like MH isn't a horror situation where you can kill the big bad#'getting help' is a meaningless argument - what would successfully helping or getting help even look like? anyway.#the sub argument of this post is that Alex's biggest 'sin' is that he doesn't perform emotions the way other people want him to#like Alex is a character with a kind of flat affect - instead of LOOKING scared or grieved he LOOKS bored or angry#and everyone judges him based on that - so Alex is 'Suspicious' he's 'Lying' he's 'Guilty' but all of these deductions are predicated#on the belief that Alex isn't reacting to his circumstances the way a 'Normal' person would - so it MUST all be an act and so he's guilty#so everyone treats him like he's guilty until the end of season two when he's like 'Fuck it FINE i'll be guilty then' and so it goes#not a self-fulfilled prophecy but being Cornered Into a prophecy and then Blamed for it - SAD. anyway
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platypusisnotonfire · 2 months ago
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well.
I'm 30.
#one minute ago#damn I really REALLY thought I'd have my life more together#I mean to be real I 10000% did not expect to live until 30 good grief#but in my day dreams of 'what I might have been like if I lived to be an adult' this was not it#not still living like an emancipated minor in a 1 1/2 that's not even official it's more of a charity by the people who own the garage#that it's built in#not remembering to eat every day and eating the same 'gotta eat something' random assortment of whatever is in the cabinets#that I've been eating since I was 4#still working 4 jobs and not having my phd yet#literally never gone on one date and still feel too young for a relationship because I don't ever EVER want to be that guy#who doesn't know how to do anything and expects their partner to take care of them#I can barely do laundry and I straight up refuse to do dishes#I buy paper plates and cups#I'm not going to impose that on anyone#I keep thinking when I grow up I can have a relationship but I'm not old enough yet#but buddy I'm a freaking grown up now#30 is no joke#it's official#I just suck.#it's not about age its about being a garbage person#like i would never ever EXPECT my partner to take care of me but in practical terms I would fail at keeping the house clean#and they would pick up the slack becuase they don't want to live in a trash hole and would get mad and/or bitter with me for making them#living alone my bad choices only effect me#when i've lived with roommates in the past this has always been a key point of breakdown#even when I've tried to be extra dilligent I would forget a glass somewhere becuase I planned to reuse it and my roomate would wash it#and be mad that I felt entitled and expected them to clean up after me when I absolutly did NOT in fact I was horrified#that they needed to clean something up after me- I just simply lost track of it. and that was 10000% unfun for everyone involved#I was ashamed 100% of the time and they felt used 100% of the time and no one had a good time
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beanbeanbee · 1 year ago
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First time drawing Kitano/Martin *head in hands*
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ratatatastic · 4 months ago
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there is something so special about self fulfilling prophecies
#txt#i woke up early this morning to take advantage of the good weather after the hurricane left#because i tried to get a skate in yesterday. failed miserably. and made it a maintenance day instead. and had to adjust my wheels.#anyways everyone else thought that as well because there was a lot more people on my route than usual so early in the morning#and i was like 3/4ths of the way through my route and there was this really pretty woman with preformance fans that were flowing so prettily#in the high winds with a cute traditional dress dancing and then i promptly ate shit staring at her because i was trying to slow down#but the winds knocked me off balance and i couldnt catch myself in time because of said staring and realised a little too late she was#filming and she finished her dance stopped filming and turned to me in utter disbelief as she smiled like#YOU COULD JUST PASS BY??? YOU DONT NEED TO STOP??? because she thought i stopped because i didnt want to mess up her video#and i didnt have the heart to tell i only noticed after i was kneeling on the floor waiting for her to finish that i even saw her tripod#and i was like nono!! youre good its okay!!! im okay 👍!!! and scuttled off and went honestly this is what i get for wearing the tank#i got at pride today of all days like this one is on me ive fufilled the prophecy i never wear it out because the sun is a ferocious thing#and the last time i did my shoulders burned pretty bad even with sunscreen but i had a hoodie ontop because it was windy today#and i thought oh its fine itll be fine. chat never change your habits and routines. superstitions are real. and the gods will punish you.#anyways why self fulfilling prophecy. well if you guessed the tank had the best buy logo but instead of “buy” it replaces it with “bi”#youd be correct. and also the disaster bi allegations are very strong with this one.#anyways im think im just afflicted with dumb shit happening when im in the middle of the route because last time a guy did chat me up#while i was resting and invited me back to his hotel room after i yapped his ear off about the pantrs#and i didnt say it but i did turn it down because... the cats were playing in like 2 hours so...#or like that other time-#okay you know what i do have to stop
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fauvester · 6 months ago
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jun wu monroe. very nice king of heaven. no murder at all
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loveletterworm · 1 year ago
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(homestuck specifically does not count here because its too popular and would break the intent of this question. I dont care if you read homestuck. Pretend it doesn't exist for the purposes of this question)
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blueskittlesart · 2 years ago
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YouTube is not ready for your cool and awesome LOZ opinions
real
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drysauce · 7 months ago
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truly a blessing that im not home right now or i don't what i'd do to my roommate. fucking audacity
#long story short results from the final test from water constructiona got posted#she got the 9th highest score out of all 150 people#i barely passed having 2 points over the limit and our 3rd friend was short on 3 points so she will have to retake#mind you that last girl was the one who actually put the most work into this out of us three#she actually thoroughly prepared me while i read the presentations twice and my roommate didn't do anything at all#roommate got a cheat sheet minutes before the test from some rando and just copied the answers that were there#and now is boasting how she got one of the top scores without wasting any time#got lucky okay that's life#but then on the general uni group chat one guy asked about when's the 2nd try for the test#and i response to which my roommate on our private group started a whole ass monologue#that how in the worst HE didn't pass this. he was always getting top scores from all the subject. he got a 5.0 from hydrology#well shut the fuck up he's just some guy who's a student like anyone else#it's not set in stone that he'll always have top scores because it's just fucking hard anyway can do worse sometimes even top students#maybe he was tired maybe he didn't have time to study maybe he didn't have any cheat sheets and just tried to rely on his knowledge#anything can happen and he can get any grade just like anyone can#very few things piss me off as much as people saying stuff like her#i got so heated up over this that my head started to hurt#i hate it here#this is what makes me always so damn anxious before any test#because if i fail everyone always starts asking what happened and how ME out of all people didn't pass#so now when dhe started saying this about that guy it just hit to close to home i guess#i need to go on a walk to cool down
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timesskip · 1 year ago
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ok Im back
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kyouka-supremacy · 2 years ago
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_
#random rambles#The last ask sent me on five different tangents I wasted the whole afternoon over#I opted against adding this to the ask because it'd be unrespectful to Anon but if I don't let it out somewhere I'll die#Everyone knows how beyond what it may look like that I don't like bsd and that includes Beast#But the ask touches the exact reason why I think Beast ultimately fails as a story#because it constantly tries to frame Akutagawa as evil and heartless; but what's framed as his most cruel action#- the one of mindlessly slaughtering his enemies at the start - is itself moved by love#And I know someone in the wings is already arguing#“that's the whole point. the reader is supposed to see through it‚ and see that Akutagawa wasn't inherently evil to begin with”#… But I don't think that's the case. This is not the place to talk about it but at the same time I don't want to make a post about it#but at the same time I feel like I won't have peace untill I've brought this up.#That's not the case because 1) Dazai says it's not the case‚ and Dazai is the character with most authority in the entire franchise#and 2) Ryuunosuke's later scene with Gin reinforces the fact that Akutagawa's action was cruel and inhuman#But it's not true. It's just that the author is a little nihilist that doesn't believe humans are inherently good.#So please let's just stop pretending they aren't? Because bsd fans. in my very humble opinion - are in severe need of someone#to remember them they are free to like aspects of the franchise even without acting like its morals aren't completely fucked up#Sorry for derailing it's been tormenting me since forever I desperately needed to mention it somewhere.#I've recently read someone say that bsd sustained that humans are inherently good and like... What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck.#Like there ARE series that do that? T/pn is one of them? Read t/pn if you want that? It's good?#But bsd definitely doesn't c'mon it's not that hard#Ugh. sorry for this. It was just to say#I love Beast but I don't like bsd and Beast is part of bsd and Beast does ultimately adhere to bsd's fucked up morals Kyotag out#I'm just saying we should all be able to recognize where our personal worldviwes end and where the author's start.#If you don't you aren't reading you're projecting#I'm not even rereading this#if I'll overthink it a second more I know it'll end up together with my millions black posts at the bottom of my drafts#Post
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mainfaggot · 1 year ago
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everyone is always distancing themselves from me and i cant help but feel like im just deeply pathetic
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terrorbirb · 1 year ago
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I think permanent corrective actions and root cause analysis exist solely to cause people with OCD and anxiety disorders to ruin their brains.
#totes bro#every time i make a mistake i make 3 mistakes#1 i mixed up letters in a word and pulled the wrong thing#2 i know i mix up numbers and letters so i should have had a system in place to prevent this#3 whatever system i come up with is guaranteed to not be permanent so if anything similar happens its also my fault#and then it's 'if you keep asking why what is the cause of the problem'#and the answer cant be human error or lack of funds so its some system i didnt design always#and this is sthe same thing if someone else makes a mistake because i didn't design a process that would have prevented that#and once again whatever i do change is guaranteed to fail in the future and then it's nicole didnt you try to fix this already#but often its like some tangential problem like i pulled the wrong qty of the right item#i tell my therapists this and they ask is there an answer where i am not to blame in this entire company and the answer is no#♥️#because I design the processes and if people dont follow the processes its because i designed them wrong#anyway! having really bad anxiety hours#I've tried to bring this up and I get told 'well design a better process where this isnt the problem ' and that.... misses the point#Because now the problem is i feel anxious because i failed to make processes that are infallible (which is the expectation) and so i need t#make a process to handle my anxiety which is guaranteed to fail#and is also my fault that i feel the anxiety because why didn't i correct for this sooner when i started my anxiety#they say these things like 'look on the bright side you can improve' and really i cant because even if i do i wont fully improve#which you know makes the permanent corrective action not permanent#and they say you know permanent doesnt mean definitely permanent but then any time theres a problem theyre like 'why wasnt it permanently..#and i try to say you told me last time permanent doesnt mean permanent and its no. bad. youre just trying to stop short of a well polished#process. look at 5s#and it starts over and over and over#i try to say the way we do this doesnt work for me because everything is my fault even if its someone elses error#and because it causes me anxiety because I know no process is perfect but it was supposed to be permanent#but hr my bosses everyone just do not empathize with me at all and cant figure out why im anxious and how this makes it worse#because there's room for improvement!#also if its not clear many of the mistakes are because im dyslexic
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kupfergeist · 1 year ago
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You know, I considered keeping these in my inbox, make it an aquarium, but I think it's best if I set them free Just look at how shiny they are!! Absolutely lovely little dudes, I love their coloring and frilly fins
#thank you so much for sending me these!!#they made my week tbh#goofy little fellas#Their names are really interesting too! They are also called 'Devils Hole Fish' in english#And 'Teufelskärpfling' in german which roughly translates to 'Devils finfish' in english#They are about 2 to 3 cm long which is like one or two inches I think? I have no idea about inches and all that#The individuals in this image are (as seen in the file name) male which can be seen in their blue color; in general they are silvery white#(with in general I mean outside the mating season; the female fish are silver all the time iirc)#They are endangered and only live in one place which is also where they were discovered around 1830? or 1890...or 1930? I hate numbers :(#it's one of those I'm sure#That place would be a limestone basin above a warm water source called the Devils hole (hence the name of the fish)#That water source is located 15m underneath the ground and the basin above it is about as big as a small room I'd say#People have tried to grow the population artifically but it failed which is tragic since the population in that basin is still declining#as far as I know at least; it's possible I missed something and it went back up again but last I knew there were like only... 110 of them?#This is because of a pump station located very closely to this Devil's hole (can you see I find that name is amusing?)#is stopping the water in that basin from rising; and therefore endangering the habitat of these fish#The close by Hover Damn is also responsible for this and researching this I did not expect this name to pop up#Fallout New Vegas follows me everywhere it would seem#And also! They eat diatoms which are some funky looking things as well! Algae if I remember correctly#I highly highly highly recommend looking at pictures of those#They are pretty pretty; trust me on this#Also; and feel free to ignore this; but these guys give me Mirage and V1 from Ultrakill vibes#based on the color mostly#Although really; show me anything blue and metallic and I will find a way to make it about them#Don't even get me started on color associations; I will not shut up and that is a promise#I could make one of those 5 hour breakdowns of why which shade of any color makes me think of the little idiots that occupy my mind 24/7
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