#because like... lets be real... seeing and learning about what makes people happy... is super cool. the world needs more happiness

[malleleothreesome]

YOUR MALLEUS POST IS JUST!!!!! AGDKFFLSVFL!!!! WHO KNOWS HOW MANY TIMES I RE-READ THAT THING BUT IT WAS WORTH THE WAIT!!!! 😫😭👌🖤💚

I'm so late to this but thank you so much Knight!! 🖤💚🖤💚 I'm so happy you enjoyed Blindfolded Malleus... I was so excited for you to read it, and I'm very happy it lived up to the hype and anticipation!!! Truly, I am so honored and grateful that you would re-read something so long 🥹 it amazes me how supportive you are!! I hope I can continue to write things that you enjoy! One day in the [regretfully] far future I swear to you that I will put out an Idia fic just for you hehehe. I'm so overwhelmed by the amount of things I am excited to write, but I guess that is a wonderful problem to have! I only wish I had more time in the day to write, but alas, such is life. Why the fUCk am I writing so formal right now daiohssadoi;hdSAO not me saying BUT ALAS. SUCH IS LIFE????? It is so.

I'm actually taking a TWELVE DAY vacation from work starting on the 22nd so I might actually do a little request event where people can send me like kink prompts or something. I think that'll be fun!

Okay and FINE I'll do some fluff prompts too for the fluff people but please don't judge my fluff too harshly, I'm still learning!!! For some reason smut just comes naturally dhaDSAHIDDASijdsan I'll start gathering some prompts and we will do a little ask game or something.

📣 By the way FELLOW HONEST THIGH RIDING ANON if you SEE this first of all, ONCE AGAIN: I wish to express my undying devotion to you and your exceptional thought process. I am positively frothing at the mouth over your request and I am PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE I am finally making good progress and it WILL be out soon. We WILL make him cum in his pants. We WILL make him cry, whimper, and moan.

[redvexillum]

"EPISODE 5 ISN'T A RAGATHA EPISO--"

So I just finished watching Episodes 4 and 5 of The Amazing Digital Circus for the third time because I’ve clearly given my life to this show and Gooseworx owns my soul. Genuinely, what phenomenal writing. I've seen mixed reception for episode five but I’m thrilled that the majority of the fandom can agree this episode was amazing. Because that means I can scream with all you FunnyBunny shippers and dedicated emotional wrecks alike.

Now. Let me get into why Episode 5 wasn’t just a Jax episode (though it very much was)—but why it was, at its core, Ragatha’s episode. This is gonna be long and laced with “am I overthinking this?” moments. Buckle up.

WHO IS RAGATHA?

When we first meet her in Episode One, she’s nice. Incredibly kind. Super peppy. But there's this teeny-tiny crack in that candy coating. She spirals, just a little, and we see a nervous, anxious edge slipping through her “positive vibes only” persona.

And that spiral? It’s not a one-time thing. It gets worse. The deeper you go into the series, the more you notice how her overbearing positivity feels less like optimism and more like a coping mechanism. A weaponized smile. She’s not just trying to cheer everyone up, she’s gaslighting herself into believing she has to be happy. She has to be likable. That it’s the only way she’ll be accepted.

And in the Digital Circus, where identity is shredded (like you forget your name for fuck's sakes) and everything’s performative? That’s not just sad...it’s devastating.

EPISODE 4: THE CRACKS BEGIN TO SHOW

Episode Four set the entire foundation. When Ragatha gets “stupid sauce” in her eyes and all her emotional filters drop, you finally see her. She stops curating how she’s perceived and just exists...and what comes out? She reminisces of her life (which gets confirmed in Episode 5). Gangle tries to warn her she might get hurt, and her response is almost eerie in how casually she brushes it off.

Sure, it could be a nod to Raggedy Ann and all that doll-abuse lore, but when you learn about Ragatha’s real past: abusive, narcissistic mother, high-society pressure cooker upbringing...that “hurt” starts feeling very literal. Maybe this line wasn’t just random doll humor. Maybe it’s a whisper of childhood trauma, manifesting through a false smile.

And then comes the Gloink Queen. The way Ragatha lights up at the idea of a mother who genuinely cherishes every single one of her hundreds of children? I fucking felt that. It wasn’t just admiration; it was longing. Desperation. Like she never got that kind of love growing up, so the concept itself is intoxicating. It’s this quiet heartbreak that adds a whole new layer to her need for approval.

She hates Jax. Let’s be real. He antagonizes her constantly, pushes every one of her buttons (he literally threw her in a goddamn vat of boiling oil for fucks sakes). But the part that wrecks me? She doesn’t want him to hate her. Not because she likes him, but because anyone disliking her is unbearable. Being disliked means she failed. Means she’s unworthy. Means she’s alone.

That’s why her facade, this grinning, chipper armour? It's everything. And the more we see of her, the more we understand that it’s crumbling.

I NEED YOU ALL TO LOCK THIS SCENE INTO YOUR BRAINS, OKAY? Because this exact emotional thread gets replayed like a broken record all throughout Episode Five. It’s not just a one-off moment, it’s the theme. The cast knows Ragatha’s cheer is fake. And honestly? It makes sense. They’ve been stuck together for who-knows-how-long, and you learn a lot about someone in that kind of nightmare.

But here’s the thing: when someone keeps pushing toxic positivity, constantly trying to “cheer you up” without actually listening, it doesn’t help. It hurts. It makes the person reaching out feel like they’re talking to a wall. Ragatha so badly wants people to open up to her, but she’s terrified of doing the same in return, and that’s where the entire disconnect lies. She’s hyper-aware of how she’s perceived. Her self-image is a prison. And at the core of it all?

Rejection.

Her biggest, ugliest, most soul-deep fear. Because rejection leads to isolation. And isolation? Leads straight back to the kind of loneliness she probably drowned in as a child.

Now, you're probably wondering: why am I still going off about Episode Four when I promised this was a breakdown of Episode Five?

Because Episode Four is the breadcrumb trail. It's the soft warning. The writer’s subtle little “hey, pay attention to her” moment. It’s the appetizer. It preps us, emotionally and narratively, for the main course of Episode Five, where Ragatha's carefully-constructed image begins to crack and we finally, finally, start to understand the full scope of her trauma.

Let’s address the big criticism real quick: a lot of people think this was a Jax-centric episode. And I get it. Jax got depth, growth, actual backstory. But here’s my take: Jax and Ragatha are each other’s foils.

One is warm, soft-spoken, always smiling, but secretly repressing everything real.

The other is brash, rude, antagonistic—but when he opens up? He’s real. He’s genuine.

They’ve been clashing since Episode One, and their dynamic works because they’re mirrors: distorted, but parallel.

Why was using Jax as Ragatha’s foil so brilliant? Because it does two huge things. First, it finally shows us Jax as a person instead of just telling us he’s a dick with a smile. But more importantly?

It amplifies Ragatha.

A foil, by definition, is a character who highlights the traits of another character by contrasting with them. And what better way to show Ragatha’s entire internal collapse than by placing her beside someone who, while difficult and abrasive, actually manages to connect with someone else?

Because as Jax grows closer to Pomni, the very connection Ragatha has been chasing since Day One, it throws Ragatha’s failures into painful high-def. She’s tried everything. She’s been kind, supportive, the “good friend.” And yet, it’s not her Pomni opens up to. It’s not her Pomni laughs with.

And that is why Episode Five is a Ragatha episode. Maybe not in the obvious, center-stage way. But in the subtle, devastating unraveling that plays out just beneath the surface.

Now, let’s talk receipts. I’ve got observations, breakdowns, and repeat viewings of Episodes Four and Five loaded and ready.

I don’t know if it was a deliberate artistic choice or just an organic part of the scene composition, but I can’t not point out how telling it is that the characters are all paired off: Jax and Pomni, Kinger with Zooble and Gangle, and yet Ragatha? She’s standing off in the distance. Alone. Isolated. Visibly excluded from every natural dynamic.

And I really want to believe that was purposeful. A quiet visual cue for us, the audience, to understand not just the social dynamics of the group, but how deeply disconnected Ragatha truly is from the others.

Honestly, I think this was the moment her carefully held-together mask started to split. The start of the spiral. Go back to the earlier episodes and you’ll start noticing it: Ragatha drops a lot of sharp, snarky comments. Some subtle. Some cutting. Whether intentional or not, those little moments are emotional leaks. She drops her filter more often around Jax, which makes sense, she hates him. She doesn’t bother hiding it. But the fact that her snark surfaces at all tells us something: the mask is slipping.

Think about Episode One, when Ragatha spirals, it’s visceral. It’s raw and disturbing in a way the others’ breakdowns just… aren’t. Why? Because for Ragatha, cracking isn’t just about stress or fear. It’s about exposing something she’s worked so hard to hide: her real, “ugly,” human feelings. She’s repressed them for so long, forced herself to smile through it all, because she believes that if she isn’t likable, if she isn’t “good,” she’ll be abandoned.

And now? That bottle’s starting to shake.

I'll circle back to this moment when I dive into the bar scene later (because oof—there’s so much there), but let’s keep things chronological for now.

Right after Ragatha leaves, Jax drops a line on Pomni: “[She] is taking advantage of you.” And it hits especially hard because just before that, Gangle told Pomni she didn’t think Ragatha was genuine. That? That’s when the discomfort surrounding Ragatha starts to really take shape.

Here’s why I think that hit a nerve with the rest of the cast.

They are all constantly fighting for their sanity. For their identities. They’re trapped in this surreal, terrifying digital purgatory where reality is questionable at best and all they’ve got are each other. That’s it. Just a bunch of strangers trying not to fall apart or, worse, abstract.

And when you're in that space? Vulnerability becomes everything. And it’s risky.

Being vulnerable to the wrong person, someone who doesn’t reciprocate, or worse, uses your openness against you is traumatic. It teaches you to close up. To withdraw.

To stop trying.

Now imagine reaching out to someone like Ragatha, who seems supportive on the surface, who says the right things, but there’s a disconnect. You don’t feel like you’re being seen. You don’t feel safe. You don’t feel like you’re talking to someone who’s willing to meet you in the mess.

And when that happens? Of course they gravitate elsewhere. Of course they pair off, find comfort in each other, and leave her on the fringes.

What hurts the most, though, is this: Ragatha wants connection. She’s starving for it. But she doesn’t know how to give it back in a way that feels real. She’s so wrapped up in being “the nice one,” the peacemaker, the cheerful glue of the group, that she can’t drop the act—even when it’s pushing people away. Even when it’s exactly what’s isolating her.

She wants to be close. She just doesn’t know how to be vulnerable.

Now, the biggest lore drop of Ragatha's past, let's break this down:

Throughout the entire series so far, Ragatha always speaks with this carefully curated tone: gentle, friendly, overly polite. But every time she gets a moment alone to monologue? It always derails. Every time. Her words unravel, her tone falters, and what starts as “everything’s fine” ends with something much darker, much sadder.

And this scene? God. This one hurt. Because when she starts talking about her mother, it stops feeling like just another breakdown. It feels like the core of her trauma is being yanked out into the open. She’s clearly an adult. Had a life. A career. Probably responsibilities and routines. And yet, that wound from her mother is still festering: deep, raw, and most importantly?

Completely unresolved.

This is where you see her coping mechanisms in full force. Ragatha has this heartbreaking tendency to downplay her own pain. She’ll smile through it, make a light comment, move on like it doesn’t ache. But it does. And that habit? It sabotages her ability to connect with people in a real, vulnerable way. Because how can someone share mutual pain with you if you never admit to having any? If you can’t even be real with yourself?

Remember when she confessed she hates Jax, but she doesn’t want Jax to hate her? That moment says everything. That desperate need to be liked, even by someone who openly antagonizes her, speaks volumes about her internal wiring. She’s terrified of rejection. Of being disliked. Of being seen as not enough.

And this scene, to me, is one of the most heartbreaking moments in the show. Ragatha is caught in this awful limbo: she wants connection, deeply. She wants friendship, understanding, belonging. But the second she senses discomfort, awkwardness, even the slightest ripple of tension, she backpedals. She shrinks. She brushes it off with a laugh or a sugar-coated phrase. And that’s exactly why the others can’t reach her.

She’s surrounded by people and still completely alone.

This scene also confirms what we’ve suspected all along: her mother had impossibly high standards. That nothing Ragatha did was ever good enough. That she had to perform perfection just to maybe receive love. It was a transaction. "Be the perfect little girl, the perfect daughter, the perfect doll, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll earn affection."

So of course she acts like this now. Of course she wraps herself in forced smiles and gentle words. Because somewhere deep down, she still believes that if she slips, if she messes up, if she shows anything “ugly”...then no one will love her.

Jax was a grade A asshole for this one. No sugarcoating it. He knew how badly Ragatha wanted to be Pomni’s friend. He’s not clueless. So when he swooped in and started getting close to her? Of course it triggered Ragatha. You could practically see her flinch.

And that sting? It echoes through the rest of the episode five from that point onwards. Especially when they get to the ball game scene.

That was the moment Ragatha finally let some of that bottled-up frustration out. She flat-out called Jax out, asking why he was trying to influence Pomni into acting like some careless, insensitive jerk. And yeah, on the surface it seems like just another clash between the two of them, but if you look a little closer (and maybe I’m reaching this), there’s something deeper going on.

From earlier episodes, we’ve seen Ragatha has this habit of telling Pomni how she should feel. She does it in this oddly motherly tone, like she’s trying to guide her, but in a way that almost infantilizes her. In Episode Two, in the candy kingdom bit, Ragatha starts talking to Pomni like she’s a child and Pomni immediately shuts it down: “I’m not a kid.”

That wasn’t just sass.

That was a boundary.

And it clicked for me: Ragatha might be echoing her mother’s behavior here. That condescending tone disguised as “help.” The “cheer up, it’s not that bad” mindset. The insistence that things should be okay, instead of just lettingpeople feel. Maybe that’s all she ever knew. And now, she’s unknowingly replicating it.

So when she follows Pomni’s advice to “try being a jerk sometimes,” and it backfires, when Pomni looks at her, clearly uncomfortable, it hits Ragatha like a rock. That same feeling of rejection, all over again.

And did anyone else notice the glitch when she apologized? Because I sure as hell did. It was subtle, but holy fuck, please don't be the next abstraction!

Then came the "Pomni Saves the Day (Almost)" scene, when it’s her turn to bat. She asks Ragatha if she wants to take her place, to "redeem" herself from her earlier miss. And for just a second, Ragatha lights up. It’s this tiny flicker of hope. Maybe this is her chance. Maybe she can fix things.

Maybe she’s needed.

But then… the game was already over and they won before she had a chance to bat because their evil version is basically KO'd. She turns to Pomni and sees them.

Pomni and Jax. Laughing. Close. Connected.

And suddenly that hope? It deflates.

Just like in the stargazing scene, we get this physical distance motif again. Ragatha is always just far enough to see the connection—but never be part of it. And in that moment, you can see it on her face, this quiet, confused heartbreak. The kind of grief that doesn’t explode...it just sinks in. Like she’s trying to understand why her kindness, her effort, her presence was never enough. Why being “nice” only pushed Pomni further away.

That expression she gives, caught somewhere between confusion, disappointment, and slowly-processed loss? God, that got me. It wrecked me. Because in that moment, she’s not angry. She’s not dramatic.

She’s just... alone.

And then finally… the nail in the coffin. The moment where the silent divide between Pomni and Ragatha becomes undeniable. The moment the entire show has been quietly building toward since Episode One.

Ragatha, who has tried so hard to make Pomni smile. To be her rock. To forge a connection. She wants that closeness. She craves that intimacy. But instead, she watches as Pomni laughs, genuinely, mind you, and effortlessly at Jax’s antics. And the second Pomni notices Ragatha looking? Her smile drops. Instantly. That joy disappears, replaced by awkwardness, tension, that same guarded expression we’ve seen before.

And it says everything.

Pomni can’t be herself around Ragatha. She doesn’t feel safe doing so. She might think Ragatha is a “nice enough” person… but that’s it. That’s where the connection ends. She doesn’t let her guard down. Doesn’t let Ragatha in. Because Ragatha, in all her curated cheer, never really opens up either.

And then the show drives it home with brutal elegance: the group starts to drift off, one by one, naturally falling into their new little dynamics. And Ragatha? Left standing in the middle. Alone. Forgotten. No one turns to her. No one invites her. She’s just there.

For all the time she’s spent in the Digital Circus, Pomni managed to connect with everyone else. Even Jax. And that, right there, is pure devastation for me.

Because all Ragatha has ever known is people-pleasing. That’s how she survives. That’s what she was taught. Be the sunshine, be the good girl, be agreeable and comforting and helpful then you’ll be loved. Then you’ll be safe. But what happens when that mask doesn’t work? When it actually pushes people away instead of bringing them in?

She doesn’t know how to express her loneliness. She doesn’t know how to say, “I’m hurting too.” Because that’s not what was modeled for her. That’s not what her mother taught her.

And this...this right fucking here is why Gooseworx was so right when they said this was a Ragatha episode.

Because Ragatha’s character flaws, the heart of her tragedy, are brought into the light not by spotlighting her, but by quietly contrasting her with a pair of characters we never expected to bond: Jax and Pomni.

From the start, we’re fed this narrative: Jax is an asshole. He teases Pomni. He’s rude, smug, abrasive. And yet… Pomni starts to soften around him. She connects. She even laughs. And you start to wonder...why is he getting through to her when Ragatha can’t?

Because Jax, in his own messed-up way, gets real. He opens up. He admits things. He’s emotionally messy, but it’s genuine. And that rawness, that honesty, is something Ragatha can’t allow herself to show. So while Jax slowly reveals the depth beneath his snark, Ragatha clings to her role: the always-smiling, ever-positive comfort character.

And that contrast? It’s heartbreaking.

You see it at the very end. How alone she is. And the cruel twist? She’s probably the one who needs connection the most. But she’s so stuck in her pattern, so locked in that internalized belief that she has to perform to be loved, that she ends up isolating herself even further.

I can’t stop thinking about this: Ragatha feels like someone who’s spent her entire life just close enough to be seen, but never close enough to be reached. She’s the background character in her own life: present, smiling, helpful… and utterly alone.

And maybe the reason so many people felt like this episode was more about Jax than Ragatha is because we’re supposed to feel her slipping into the background. Just like the cast is starting to overlook her, we as the audience are starting to, too.

That slow fade?

It’s intentional.

Thank you for coming to my rant. I never done a character analysis before, but I just fucking love this series so much.

Read More TADC Character Analysis

[heartyluv]

Not the same anon that originally requested this, but I absolutely loved your fic where Zayne and Sylus react to you saying you want to be the first to die. The way you wrote their reactions was perfect and wonderful to read, and (if you’re interested, of course) I’d love to see how the other three guys would also reply to such a statement c:

I only recently found your account and I can’t wait to read through more of your works <3

Note: I’m so happy that you enjoyed and even more so that you’re considering reading more. It makes me super happy. I’m really hoping I wrote Xavier and Rafayel accurately. I’m kinda nervous about theirs, but I hope you enjoy, luvly!

Warning: Mentions of Xavier in an accident, Mentions of Caleb dying (THEY ARE OKAY!!!)

Link to Zayne and Sylus’ <3

Creds to @/enchanthings-a for the divider!

Rafayel

You were elated when your boyfriend invited you over for a little date in his studio. Of course you said yes, because not only is Rafayel hard to say no to, but his studio is one of your favorite places to be.

It’s where you feel your safest to create, and it’s not just about painting. You draw, color, and even write poetry when you’re there. You completely understood what he meant when he told you that the energy in this place was so empowering because you’ve experienced it first hand.

As you and he work on your own respective projects side by side, he starts telling you about how he recently rewatched Romeo and Juliet. You listened intently, even if you already knew the story. But it was as he told it that you found yourself growing slightly emotional.

The story is something almost everyone is familiar with, whether they learned it in school or took it upon themselves to read it on their own time.

The story of two people loving each other so much and so hard that it kills them, because the mere thought of them not being alive to experience life with you, build a stronger love with you, makes nothing else feel worth it—it’s incredibly heartbreaking. And now that you have a boyfriend, the sentiment is much heavier. The thought of Rafayel dying, stirs a pain so uncomfortable in your chest that you know never, ever want to experience it.

“Hey,” he calls to you gently, noticing how dazed out you seemed. He sees the tears forming right above your waterline when you face him, and immediate concern is etched across his ethereal face.

“Let me guess? It makes you cry too?” he teases, gently rubbing your cheek and smearing a faint light blue paint on your skin. “I’m not ashamed to say that I succumb to the emotions every time myself. I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t.”

But when you don’t laugh, when your lower lip quivers the more you memorize his features like he’ll disappear, he began to realize this has become something he needs to take a little more seriously.

“Did I say something wrong?” he asks innocently, completely dumbfounded by your change in emotions.

“I’m so sorry,” you finally speak, your words fumbling out as you wipe the tears from your eyes. You feel embarrassed, but you know better than to feel that way around him. He always makes sure you know that embarrassment will never be a real thing between you two. Nothing is off-limits. “It just…the story. It makes me think of you—of us.”

He tilts his head, his soft purple hair swaying across his forehead. “Oh? What do you mean?”

You sigh, taking a deep breath as you get ready to lay your little heart out on the table like you’ve done for him dozens of times.

“Rafayel, I legitimately cannot lose you,” you emphasize, feeling your heart thump harder in your chest from intense emotions. Your voice is shaky as you continue. “And I know this is so random and I didn’t mean to make you telling me about your movie night into a whole thing, but the thought of me experiencing anything in this life without you makes me..sick. It would break me. It makes me realize that I have to be the first one to go the day our time on this Earth is up.”

He smiles softly as you, cupping your cheek in his hand. “Have you seen how I act when you take more than five extra minutes to come home?”

That makes you laugh, a joyous feeling sparking in your being. Most people dislike anyone who turns something serious into something lighthearted, but your Raf always has a way of making heavy situations and conversations feel weightless.

“But in all seriousness,” his face shifts to match his tone to let you know that he takes your worries and thoughts seriously. “I don’t want to hear you talk like that. Ever. You know why?” He stands from his stool, walking to stand between your leg where you sit. “Because we are never going to be apart. I’ve already told you before, you’re not allowed to leave me.” He winks, making the tension ease.

“I’d swim across every ocean for you a million times over. For a man like me to find and experience the love of someone more glorious than himself, it’s not a privilege I take for granted. I’ve always been Rafayel, but I can admit that I will always be a better him, with you beside me. You add too much value and good to my life for you to ever think that I could actually survive without you. I can deal with a lot, but a world with no you? That’s too harsh.”

He presses his forehead to yours. “You have nothing to worry about. I feel just as intensely as you do, pretty girl. I don’t want you thinking of what could be. Think of everything in between, yeah?”

He leans down to kiss your lips and you desperately cling to him. “You’ll never lose me and l’ll never lose you, fair?”

You chuckle, knowing that conversations like this make his heart hurt, too. Similarly to you, your boyfriend hates the idea of abandonment or being separated from you for any reason. He doesn’t take the idea of it lightly. But when he needs to be stronger for you, there’s nothing powerful enough to crush his will to protect your heart.

“Fair,” you nod with a smile.

“Good. I’m glad we understand each other.” He kisses your nose. “Now, why don’t we go for a walk on the beach? We can see about getting something sweet on the way.” He holds his hand out to you and when you slide your hand into his, you know that no matter what the further holds, thinking of what you have now will always be more important.

Xavier

You almost had a heart attack when the hospital called you to let you know that your boyfriend has been in a car accident. They assured you it wasn’t serious, but the only person you’ve ever loved and accident being in the same sentence, made you experience emotions you never thought you were capable of.

They said he couldn’t have called you himself since he was going through some tests and check ups, but not being able to hear his voice made you feel…insane.

When you ran into the hospital, begging for his name and room number, a nurse walked you to him with too much ease. You needed her to be faster, much faster.

“He’s right there. Room 410,” the lady politely smiles. You can’t bother with kindness, moving past her and rushing into the room. He’s sitting on a hospital bed, his blood pressure being checked by the doctor standing beside him.

“Hon,” he says with slightly wide eyes. “I guess the hospital called you.”

“Xavier, oh my god,” you cry, running towards him. You cup his face in your hands, running your eyes over him like your scan is better than a doctor’s. “Are you in pain? How’s your head? Your body?” His eyes stay on you the whole time as you examine him, the doctor chuckling softly beside you both.

All you smell is alcohol, rubber gloves, and oversaturated—but necessary—cleanliness. You don’t like him here. You don’t like it one bit.

“You’re free to go home,” the doctor confirms. “Just make sure you take the pain medicine if you need it. Other than that, nothing to worry about.”

When the doctor leaves, you finally weep. You thought the absolute worst. You thought you lost him.

“I was so scared,” you cry, resting your head on his shoulder as his hands comes to the back of your head to soothe you. “What happened?”

“The taxi I was taking to come see you…A car came out of nowhere down the intersection on a red light, and it was a hard collision against the backseat area where I sat. I saw it last minute before I was able to move, just barely.”

“Xavier… I..” you trail off, not even wanting to finish. “I can’t lose you, Xav. I would rather die than lose you.”

“You don’t mean that,” he says gently, his hand going down your back.

“I do. I can’t live without you. We can’t control how it ends, but however it does, you can never be the one to go first. I’ll never survive it.”

“And neither would I,” he asserts. “A life without you is a life I don’t care to have. Losing you is essentially the death of me.” It falls silent between you two as he makes you pull back to look at him.

“How about this? How about both of us make it a point to be present for as long as we can. Like you said, while we can’t control the end, we can control what our current reality is. And that’s you and I together, loving each other, being here for each other.”

You nod, melting into his touch as he wipes your stray tears. “Don’t say things like that though, okay? Even in extreme situations as concerning as this. I don’t like to think of anything happening to you just as much as you don’t like it for me. Your life is too important to me for you to say anything so drastic over yourself.”

“You’re right,” you sniffle, making it a point to kiss him again—this time extra hard. “I won’t, I swear. But YOU,” you point a finger at his chest. “You’re not allowed to leave the house for the next…forever!”

He smiles, kissing your hand then pulling you close again to kiss the side of your neck. “I’m sure you’ll make sure of that?”

You run your hand through his hair, giggling as he sporadically places kisses wherever his lips will land. “You can count on it.”

Caleb

You shot out of your sleep, your heart racing and your body dampened with a thin sheen of sweat. Cold wet tears fall down your cheeks and you quickly wipe them away, not liking how they feel on your skin. You blink tiredly in the dark bedroom, looking over to where Caleb is supposed to be. Not only was he not there, but it was cold when you placed your palm against the bed. He’s been gone awhile.

You had another nightmare. For some reason, they’ve been plaguing you more and more lately, their origin not making sense when the events occur in your sleep state. But this one, this was the worst by far.

The imagery of Caleb dead. Shot and killed. It replayed over and over until your mind finally won the right battle, letting you wake up to see your reality. But the fact that Caleb wasn’t beside you, it made you panic.

You threw the blankets back, put your slippers on, and exited the bedroom to search for him. You wouldn’t allow that dream to make you think it was real, that he was actually gone. You refused.

He wasn’t hard to find at all though, sitting in his hobby room, putting together another aircraft set he collected. He heard the door open, turning around to see you. He smiled widely, turning fully in his office chair. You didn’t waste a moment more, walking up to him briskly. He pressed his head to your stomach, kissing it tenderly before looking up at you.

“Why aren’t you in bed?” you question softly.

“Couldn’t sleep,” he shrugs. “Didn’t wanna wake you, so I just came to mess with this.” He sees the sadness on your face, the dewdrop tears that rested on your lashes that you didn’t wipe away when he looks up.

“You’ve been crying?” he stands immediately, ready to handle whatever has his girl in distress. “What happened?”

You try to smile the sadness away, but you see it all over again. You rest your forehead on his chest, your body shaking as you silently cry. You understand that it’s okay—normal, to be emotional about something like this, but you feel like no one will ever get it unless they’ve experienced it. His death… it felt so vivid. It makes your whole body ache.

“I had a nightmare,” you weep, trying to push it out. “That you died, Caleb. It felt so real…I had to make sure. And when you weren’t in bed I…”

“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry,” he whispers, kissing your head before wrapping his arms around you. You press your hands to his back, pressing close just to make sure he’s real.

“I’d die without you, Caleb. I wouldn’t be able to survive…” You choke on your sobs. “I’d rather it be me than you, every time. You don’t understand.”

“Never,” he says sharply, but not to cut. Just to make his point abundantly clear. “Death is never an option for you, do you understand me?” He’s stern, holding your face in his hands.

“I do understand what it’s like to love someone with your whole being, so much so that you can’t differentiate what’s you and what’s them because you’re so intertwined. It’s why I will never let you put me above you. Ever. Because you are what makes me. There is nothing for me if you’re gone.”

You only cry harder, trying to wipe the scene away from your brain and embrace this moment and all the good ones that’ll follow one day.

“I don’t want you to ever speak over yourself like that again. No matter what’s troubling you, causing you pain, rather than wishing it would happen in another way that would only bring you harm, just tell me about it so I can deal with the brunt of it. I’m meant to protect you, let me do that.”

You nod, letting him ease your overwhelming emotions. “I’m sorry,” you say meekly. “Can we go to bed, please? Together?”

“You don’t even need to ask. C’mon.”

He takes your hand, not pushing for details on the dream or the particulars. He’d never imagine making you relive something so traumatizing, even if it was fake. It was real enough to actually hurt you, and that was enough for him to make sure he comforts you to the best of his abilities because you in any type of pain is something he has always vowed to keep you safe from.

[artsy-hobbitses]

Some people got the real problems Some people out of luck Some people think I can solve them Lord heavens above I'm only human after all I'm only human after all Don't put the blame on me Don't put the blame on me

This ended up exactly as I hoped and I'm super happy with it as a back-to-basics piece with only lineart and shading to carry the strength of the message of wanting to be seen as human, feat. the Cold Constructs of TTB (Megatron, Prowl, Ravage, Starscream, Blaster and Laserbeak in that order).

There is quite a bit of symbolism going on here, so if you're interested in an indepth discussion of it, it's all under the cut.

Only the eyes were colored for each character, because in TTB, Cold Constructs are often regarded as ‘soulless’ so it’s more or less highlighting that they ‘have a soul’ in that aspect (eyes being the window to the soul and all).

Bleeding from their barcodes, to show that they are still very much human underneath the thing which makes them ‘less than human’ in the eyes of many,

Most of them looking directly at the audience to challenge their perception of shame in being government-assigned second-class citizens. (CCs learn to keep their gaze low when talking to higher ranked individuals early on)

The poses also speak to the character and how they handle their status as a Cold Construct:

Megatron is readying himself to slug anyone who speaks ill about what he is.

Prowl is stoic about what he is but also learning to be open/trusting about it (this is the most vulnerable position for the code after all, letting anyone see this has to be deliberate act on his end).

Ravage is the one most close up to the audience since he’s the one who’s most in-your-face and unapologetic about what he is.

Starscream is reluctant but defiant about it, and more interestingly, it looks like he’s been stabbed in the back, to show that he was betrayed by the system long before he learned to lie and scheme.

Blaster is the only one who seems to invite the audience, and it’s because unlike the others, his status as a CC was only was outed by himself in adulthood after he’d been accepted as an ordinary man following years of Rewind doing the best to make sure he grew up ‘normal’. He chose to take a stand and used his influence to spread awareness about the issue via his own success as a news reporter, and him reaching out to the audience aims to bridge the divide, and also ask them in a way, to see for themselves just how different his blood is from theirs. at the end of the day. (He is based off IDW Blaster, and has red eyes! As the red-eyes-evil blue-eyes-good divide doesn’t exist in TTB and he’s one of a handful of Autobots that have red ones)

Laserbeak is the only one with her eyes hidden, but that she’s weeping and it looks like her heart is bleeding speaks to how what she is still hurts her even if she tries to put up a blase front.

[wonderjanga]

Marvel on The Masked Singer

This is just a little thingy for me because I’ve been rewatching episodes. Imagine if he was on the Masked Singer? His vocal range would be crazy because I say so. He’d sing an Elvis song one week, and then a Megan Trainor song the week after that. Basically a different genre each week. Also, Mary would be the one picking the songs. She also picked the costume he wore.

The Person who Gives the Singers their Costumes: “Here we are! Take your pick.”

Mary: “We’ll take that one.” *points to a pig costume* (SHAZHAM (🐷) REFERENCE!!!)

Marvel: “But that one’s ugly.”

Mary: “So? It provides more mobility. You’re going to pick that one.”

Marvel: “But, again, it’s ugly.”

Mary: *puts hand up* “I’m sorry, but last time I checked, have you ever participated in a competition like this?”

Marvel: “Well, no, but—”

Mary: “That’s what I thought. We’ll take that one.” *points again to the costume again*

The Person who Gives the Singers their Costumes: *looks to Marvel*

Marvel: *nods head* “She’s uh… She’s the boss.” *sounds intimated*

The Person who Gives the Singers their Costumes: “Uhm…” *looks between the two* “Alright then.” *walks away to a couple other people so they could wheel the costume out, a little baffled they just watched a teenage girl intimidate a grown man*

Marvel: *looks to Mary* “You’re a little bit too into this, you know that?”

Mary: “Shush. Let me be excited! If you’re going to do this, you’re going to do this to your fullest potential!”

Marvel: *happy to see her having fun with the whole thing* “Yes ma’am.”

The choreography would go crazy too. Like Mary said, he was going to do it to his fullest potential. She’s making him learn how to dance in sync with other dancers all that. One of the only reasons he isn’t completely struggling is that a couple past Champions were dancers, ritual performers/dancers, and so on. As for if he’d win? Maybe. All I know is that absolutely no one guessed him.

Crowd and Judges: “Take off the mask! Take off the mask! Take off the mask!”

Marvel: *takes off the mask*

Show Host: *jaw drop*

Crowd: *jaws drop*

Judges: *jaws drop*

Literally any leaguer whose watching the show: *jaws drop*

Show Host: “Superhero, Captain Marvel???”

Marvel: *little wave*

Show Host: “The winner of Masked Singer season X! Congratulations, you were amazing. Now what brought you to the show?” *hands Marvel a mic*

Marvel: “Uuuh… so I came on the show cause Junior dared me. Uhm I honestly didn’t expect to win.” *gives a thumbs up* “Was super fun though.”

Show Host: “Well that’s amazing!”

And so, Marvel goes home with the trophy. Freddy suggests they melt it down and sell it before Mary tells them it probably isn’t real gold.

The next day at the Watchtower…

Marvel: *Zetas in*

Flash: *zooms over, pointing* “You!”

Marvel: “Me.” *looks around* “Something wrong, Flash?”

Flash: “Yes! You can sing?!”

Marvel: “Oh, uh… You heard about that?”

Flash: “Everyone’s heard about it!”

Marvel: “Oh.”

Flash: “Yeah, ‘oh.’”

*silence*

Flash: “We’re marathoning all the entire season.”

Marvel: “WHAT?”

As for the songs he sang, obviously an Elvis song, and for me, myself and I, Hopelessly Devoted to you by Olivia Newton-John. You can pick the other songs.

[cheeseceli]

Boyfriend Namjoon

Pairing: Kim Namjoon × gn!reader (established relationship)

Genre: fluff, headcanons

Request: Boyfriend namjoon 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

Warnings: mentions of food, he's an idol, mentions of arguments

A/n: apparently Tumblr stopped tagging everything as mature content? That's a win for us!! | Daily click

Hobi ver. | Namjoon ver. | Jimin ver. | Taehyung ver. | Jungkook ver.

Start off by saying that if you are on uni or studying something or idk

You are SO lucky

He's so campus boyfriend material

Except he doesn't even need to be on campus

Whatever the topic is, he can help you study

I love when smart people get together

Late night talks go crazy with this one

You guys can pull a whole all nighter by being philosophical or getting vulnerable with each other

Or maybe just saying nonsense

Either way, it's always a pleasure to stay all night with him

Even if you're both tired by the time the sun comes up

And that also happens when he's on tour

It doesn't matter if it's 2 in the morning where he's at, if you're able to call him, he's enjoying those moments

He's a yearner btw

So he looks at you like you are spring itself

You swear you see his eyes shine whenever you come into the room

Writes a WHOLE album about you

And actually releases it

"People are theorising that Namjoon of BTS might be in a relationship because of that and that and idk what else"

Well

He's tryna confirm those rumours

Not even on purpose

He just loves you so much that he needs to talk about you, even if it's through lyrics, or if the entire world is listening

Really likes to go out on spontaneous dates

But he also likes to plan a lot of them

So maybe museums, parks, picnics or maybe even trips

He likes to make sure you'll enjoy the time spent with him

Even though you'd be happy to just lay down on the couch with him and do nothing all day

Likes to learn everything you might want or need

Learns how to take care of your hair/skin so he can help you when you're too tired to do it yourself

Really really tried to make your favourite dish, even though the first tries failed miserably

He's getting better ok

Obviously he is very determined

His determination also applies to the relationship

So he will make it work

It doesn't matter if he is super famous, if he needs to leave for military or for a tour, if the company or the media is against this

He doesn't care about no one's opinion on this relationship besides yours

So he is very determined about you

That also goes for fights

It's natural to have arguments in a relationship

But he will never let that affect you too much

He loves you too much to lose you because of a stupid mistake or a miscommunication

Also

Whenever he stars to spiral into his own mind, gets stressed or anything

He calls you

You have this crazy ability to ground him

So don't be surprised when he gets stuck on the studio and suddenly calls you, just wanting to hear your voice

But he is also always there for you

We know that guy is a perfect listener and even better adviser

So he is there for you

In your highs and specially in your lows

Sorry but I hope you're not too attached no anything material

Because there's a chance some of your things will get broken 💔

He is clumsy by accident 😭

Won't try to show it too much but kind of lives for your praise

If you compliment him he will get a bit shy

But he is hiding the blush creeping up his neck with all his strength

Overall he is a very sweet boyfriend that kind of wants to stay with you for his entire life

He found peace in you, and he is cherishing you forever

Masterlist | you'll probably like: Espresso

Reminder this is just fiction!! I'm not trying to portray real life and you shouldn't believe that this is how the members actually are. This is just for the vibe and the delulu!

Taglist (open!): @yuyubeans @butnotmontana @sheraayasherrecs @queenofdumbfuckery @lezleeferguson-120

Dividers by @thecutestgrotto | images 1, 2 and 3

[pinkaditty]

Love Type (Tokyo Debunker Ghouls)

hey me again i said id be back quickly and i did mean that.

this will have been queued for an hour at least by the time u see it. rn as i type this im debating using the taglist. i think ill use it. sorry 4 so many tags in a day, i bet ur sick of me

anyways! i had this idea while i was writing the perv!sho x reader thing. i thought about the differences between the ghouls and how they all love differently. at first i wasn't gonna post this, but then my brain wouldn't stop thinking about it so now this exists. its not meant 2 be a useful organization tool 4 the ghouls it's just something i had a little bit of fun with.

note that not every single ghoul is going 2 match the category he was put in exactly. for example, ghouls like luca, yuri, romeo, and even haru could probably fit in more than one of these categories, but i put them in the ones i thought suited them best. wanna discuss? leave a comment or an ask! ill be happy 2 talk it through with u <3.

yes i DID put in hcs about how long they last sexually. no i do NOT regret it. im speaking my TRUTH!!!

The Lover Boys:

Haku, Haru, Sho, Luca, Zenji, Rui

do not last long but recover fast and can go multiple rounds 

prefer switching up their roles (dom→sub, sub→dom) more often 

they love like it's an incurable chronic terminal disease. it's never leaving them.

all-consuming, takes up most their time, they're drowning and falling and losing their minds 4 u

You like to tell yourself you're prepared, but is that ever really true? No, not really. The way his voice drops several octaves into a low purr just from seeing you should've been warning enough as to what you were in for. You didn't expect the all-consuming, suffocating love he'd trapped you in, but were you really complaining? As far as you were concerned, you were also convinced it was meant to be, and if he was a little crazy about it, that was a small price to pay. Of course, you eventually learn why he's crazy about it - he's never had it. The truest feeling of connection, the ability to just let it all go in one person's presence, the time to really feel another person. It's eluded him for so long, and now he has it, but it's threatened by a curse, something he cannot control. It's frightening, and though he tried not to, he ultimately buries you in his love, trying to find a way to make it last. It's okay though. As the threat wanes, so will his suffocation. The love will always be intense, but he will learn how to do it right. 

The Lost Boys:

Towa, Taiga, Jiro, Ed

they last so unbelievably long u don't know how they do it

love in more subtle ways bc 2 them, true love is quiet 

they will do loud and bold professions of it, but the real love is displayed quietly 

prefer 2 stick 2 one role (either dom or sub), not super flexible 

The occasional huge flower bouquet, expensive jewelry set, or new bag were thoughtful, but mostly just for show. He reveled in the attention, the jealous stares, the sucking of teeth, the eye rolls - all of it. Because he had you, not them. But that, of course, isn't all there is to it. While he may be relatively distant in public despite the extravagant gifts, he's rather sweet and attentive in private. He hides it better than a LoverBoy, but in truth, his heart bleeds just like theirs, and he feels the need to consistently strive to win your affections. You're amongst great people, after all. How can he make sure he stands out, all the time, just for you? You understand this, of course, and you're always quick to reassure him. He will give and give and give and give, in so many ways. You almost think he's bottomless, what with how much of himself he offers up, nearly all the time. But it's alright. He will learn to remind himself that he need not give himself away to bits simply to keep your attention, especially when he's already the apple of your eye. The gifts never stop though, and neither does his obvious enjoyment in the attention it gets you. He will never stop showing you off.

The Tragic Boys:

Leo, Subaru, Ren, Kaito, Yuri

love fluctuates. intense then quiet, hot then cold, all-consuming then insignificant 

very transparent ghouls with few layers. what u see is what u get.

often don't last long and take longer to recover 

a little more flexible with role changing, but do have solid preferences 

You are never, ever prepared. He's like a pendulum, swaying back and forth between endless, bountiful devotion and a cold shoulder the following day. He's not sure how to handle this love he has for you. It's unfamiliar, it's big, it's loud, it's petrifying. He's scared he'll do something wrong, and on those days when the fear eats him alive, he closes up, rejecting your presence. But then, he sees how down you are, and knows that wasn't right, so the following day he's at your beck and call. He'll do whatever you ask, just say the word and it's done, for you. His fatal flaw is that he never communicates his deep-seated fears, instead choosing to let them rumble in his gut and disrupt your relationship as a consequence. He wants you, though, and he never wants you to doubt that. He'll communicate eventually, the words spilling out before he can think much of them, apologies and desperate sobs with them. He won't shut down anymore after this, choosing to remain like an open book for you to read at any time. He will learn to hold you the right way, without clamming up nervously when you tell him he's perfect. 

The Silent Boys: 

Tohma, Romeo, Ritsu, Lyca, Alan, Jin

their love is consistent 

never changes, always with immense depth, but never readily apparent 

love is like a pretty serene waterfall with unseen strong currents capable of killing someone 

like to switch it up every now and again (mayyybe dom→sub, sub→dom yk)

last moderately. some might finish fast, some might take a while.

His attitude and demeanor towards you hardly change. He loves you, and he's serious about it, but that won't mean special treatment, extra gifts, or public displays of love. He will love you exactly as he always has, and sees nothing wrong with it. His love is in how he looks out for you, how he worries for you despite himself, how he may allow himself a small smile when you approach, or a sigh heavy laden with devotion, after you wrap your arms around him, and before he pushes you off of him. It's okay because you know how his heart beats erratically in his chest when you approach, which he's strangely good at hiding. You know how his breath hitches in his throat every time he sees you, his eyes glazing over like you're a vision to be committed to memory. You know how he treasures you, his love hidden under his vast sea of responsibilities. Peel the layers back and you'll see he's yours in all ways that matter, but he also knows he can't let that get in the way of his daily life. Once he has the time, and is no longer bearing the weight of prying eyes and overwhelming expectations, he'll build his life around you, to make sure you feel centered in his life, as he does in yours.

well if nobody really likes these at least i had fun. amen!

no blurb 2 put here except that i have a ren fic incoming soon bc my regular [🐟] anon went crazy in my inbox about that boy and his damn collarbones.

y'all have a wonderful day im so tired.

taglist: @cupcakesmoothie @aayakashii @sunskosh @despairingy-obsessed @glamorousspoon @mmy-meow @dailyvahine @diluxama @obscuarysghoulnextdoor @disassociationdive

want 2 join or be removed from the tkdb taglist? let me know!

[verdantmeadows]

So, in case you haven't heard...

Penny, from Scarlet and Violet is officially related to both Peony and Peonia (and, well, Rose too, since he'd be her uncle)! Peony is her father, and Peonia is her sister.

For those unaware, this is Peony.

And this is Peonia!

The woman in this image is (presumably) their mother (unless Penny is a half-sibling or adopted, which I don't think is the case).

And let me just say, this makes me so, so happy, seeing this visual/genetic diversity in a family.

So many people are completely ignorant to how genetics and biracial people can exist and have their genes expressed. Two siblings from a biracial couple, such as a black and white person, can look totally different. One could have curly hair and one could have straight! One could be super light-skinned and the other dark-skinned! Two kids from two parents doesn't mean that they necessarily just get a "mix" of how they both look.

Seeing this represented makes me so happy. I really hope more people realize just how different siblings from interracial couples can look. I really hope people don't erase this aspect of Penny's character, or think that she doesn't look Black enough or enough like a POC.

For a real life example, here are a pair of biracial twins!

(Lucy and Maria Aylmer)

So, basically, the point of this post is this:

Penny is Peonia's sister and Peony's daughter! This was my headcanon for a while, considering her name is Penny and based on Peony, but seeing it confirmed makes me so happy. I want this post to end on the note to inform people that biracial people can look like this. Biracial people can pass completely as white. White-passing biracial people can have dark-skinned parents and family members. Biracial people don't owe you passing as their ethnicity and the ethnicity/race of their family.

Please embrace this aspect of Penny and learn what being biracial can look like! Understand, acknowledge, and accept how biracial people can look! I've already seen people frustrated that Penny doesn't look "Black enough" or saying that her design makes no sense, or that she couldn't possibly be Peony's daughter, which is already a huge issue for REAL LIFE BLACK PEOPLE, who are told this!!! Even if you don't realize it, these thoughts and ideas ARE racist to have. How you view people when they're not real can often be indicative of how you treat them when they ARE real!

I hope that if you didn't already know these things, that you don't feel bad about it, and instead come away with new knowledge and understanding!

Edit: Also she could just be adopted? I meant to say that in this post and forgot. Like, adoption is a thing. Like, we know that Bede was an orphan and all... (I however don't think she was adopted based on her visual similarities)

Additional edit: I'm not trying to imply that their family is Black, either—I mentioned Black biracial families as an example, and also mentioned it at the end because I specifically made this post in response to people saying Penny "isn't black enough" and directing their racism towards Black biracial families. In all likelihood, their family is probably implied to be the Pokémon equivalent of Indian.

Other additional edit: Dialogue in game

Penny also frequently refers to her dad's behaviors that align with how Peony behaves

[soaps-mohawk]

I just saw someone talk about Simon Riley being a rapist and the only way they tried to confirm it is by saying that he is a war criminal and all soldiers are misogynistic and sexist and they also talked about how he dreamt of hurting women in the comics when that's quite literally a normal reaction by being raped by both men and women (what I mean is that abused people sometimes dream of becoming someone they're not and don't want to be) but they conveniently forgot to mention how that "dream" was a nightmare. (Just wanted to rant about this and see your opinion)

The sigh I let out when I saw this ask this morning.

I'm so sick and tired of seeing this discourse. Not just in this fandom but in every fandom. Maybe it's just because I'm old and my frontal lobe is fully developed, or maybe it's because I was in fandom back in the days where there were no tags. You were lucky if you got a warning at the beginning of a fic. Most fics you walked in blind and if you didn't like something? You hit the back button and found something else.

This sudden mainstreaming of fandom has ruined these spaces. People come in, refuse to "learn the rules" that most of us learned by just existing in these spaces and watching others interact. There were no written rules back then. We learned by observing and occasionally being guided on fandom etiquette by those more experienced than us. Now it's just like people come in expecting fandom to be like every other space on the internet and then get defensive and angry when they realize it's not. Fandom is cringy. It's nerdy. It's happy and sunshine and it's dark and ugly like every media out there. Us creators and those of us more experienced in fandom have been screaming how to exist in fandom spaces from the rooftops but no one is listening and then everyone wonders why creators are leaving these spaces. Why fandoms keep getting abandoned.

All of that aside, this discourse about FICTIONAL characters pisses me off. Simon Riley is a FICTIONAL character. He has no morality, there is no right or wrong because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him do whatever you want to do because he's NOT REAL. You can give him wings and have him fly and guess what?? Cool, that can happen because he's NOT REAL. You want to make him a rapist? Cool, you can do that because he's FICTIONAL. You can make him whatever you want to make him because he's a character. He's not a living, breathing human being. There are no consequences of his actions because he's FICTIONAL!!!

Don't even get me started on this sudden discourse about dark fics and dead dove that's appeared recently. Dark media has existed for literal centuries. The Epic of Gilgamesh from 1800 BCE. The Odyssey. Mostellaria by Plautus. The Castle of Otranto published in the 1700s. Frankenstein. Dracula. The works of Edgar Allan Poe. Lolita. Hell, look at the Bible. The Bible, especially the old testament, is fucked up. Even in the watered down, bastardized King James version, the things the old testament "God" supposedly did, when you sit and actually think about them outside the lens of religious brainrot, are super fucked up.

People have been creating dark media for a long time. Horror has existed for a long time because it plays to our worst fears. It gives us a safe way to express those fears and to experience them without having to experience them first hand. You wouldn't bitch at a horror movie director for including things like rape and gore and murder in their movies?? So why is writing different? You think every horror movie director agrees with the things they portray on screen? You think every horror movie director would go out and murder someone just because they made a movie about it? No, because we're allowed to portray things in all forms of media, we're allowed to write things without morally agreeing with them. Guess what, most people that write rape or assault or violence, aren't going out and doing those things in real life. They don't support those things in real life. In fact, people that write dark fanfics are some of the loudest protesters against those things.

If you want to make Simon Riley a real person, guess what? He's not going to be even morally grey. Most people in the military are not good people. They're not. The people that are good people in the military, or were in the military, are the ones saying that the loudest. People that got tricked into joining, people that got promised things, people that did it because they had no other choice and then realized what it was really like after getting in? Those are the people to listen to. Not Call of Duty, not the people trying to convince you to join because they're glorified sales people and have a quota to fill. Look up videos of what happened in Iraq and Afghanistan at the hands of American and British soldiers. You would not like Simon Riley if he were a real person.

But he's not real. He's FICTIONAL. Even as a fictional character, he's not a good person. So many Call of Duty fans put on the blinders and ignore the fact that these men are out here committing awful acts of violence and killing people because they're "the good guys." People love to forget that Price literally kidnapped a woman and a child and had them held at gunpoint to get information out of someone. Not only that, he was okay with it. If he were a real person that did that, you would not be questioning if he were a good person or not. You can tell the people that have never played the games or watched playthroughs, who only know these characters through the lenses of fanfics and artwork and headcanons.

Call of Duty is military propaganda. They paint these men as heroes, make it easy to put the blinders up and ignore the things that are happening, the things they're doing so that they can convince young men that they want to do that and they should join the military so they can go out and do that too. That's Call of Duty's audience. That's who they're creating these games for. These young, impressionable boys who get excited by the violence and the action who will go on to fill quota numbers for recruiters. Call of Duty was not made for us, the people writing fanfiction and creating art for it. This side of the Call of Duty fandom will be the first to tell you all of this.

This side of the fandom creates fanworks which would turn Activision's eyes red. We babygirlify their military propaganda because it actively goes against what Activision is trying to do. It goes against what Call of Duty is at its core. Sure, some people water it down a lot, and others keep it more realistic to what these men would be like in real life, because it's FICTION. You can portray these characters however you want because that's what fiction is for.

And guess what, anon? Rape kinks exist. Consensual non-consent exists. It's well known. And guess what? Victims of sexual assault and rape can develop those kinks as a coping mechanism. Here's a study from the NIH website, and if that's too complex for you, here's a VICE news article that uses that study. People can write rape and rape kinks and CNC and noncon and not support it in real life. People can write those things to bring awareness to the fact that they happen to people in real life, or because people in real life have those kinks. People write those things to help victims, to support them. It's cathartic. Dark media most often is created for catharsis. It gives people an outlet, and it allows people to experience those things in a safe, controlled environment for whatever reason.

And that's the thing, anon. People don't have to give anyone a reason for why the consume that kind of media. Creators don't owe anyone an explanation as to why they create it. It's none of your business, and if you're not comfortable with it, then don't consume it. You can turn off the TV if a horror movie is too much for you. People walk out of theaters all the time because a movie is not what they were expecting, be it because it was bad or because it was too graphic or violent or disgusting. You start reading a book and you don't like it for whatever reason? You put the book down and pick up another. Why do people have such a problem with not reading fanfics they don't like? Why do people have such a hard time just blocking creators that make things they don't want to see. Most dark fic and dead dove creators put ample warnings on their blog and their posts. That's why those tags exist. You don't like it and you don't want to see it? Then block and move on and let others enjoy what they want to enjoy.

You pearl clutchers are ruining fandom and soon there won't be anything for you to enjoy. If you can't handle fandom, then don't be in it. There is no algorithm here. You're going to see things you don't want to see and it's very easy to just block and filter tags. There was a time on Tumblr where you couldn't filter tags. I remember those days. You had to download the X-kit extension to block things, and that only worked on desktop. The fact Tumblr gave us the option to filter tags on the site and on the app was a big deal when it was rolled out. I remember so many people that didn't want to use the app when it first came out because you couldn't block potentially triggering tags.

It's not a creator's problem if you were triggered by their media. Life doesn't come with trigger warnings and it's a blessing that it's become so normalized to include warnings at the beginnings of fics. There's websites that exist for other forms of media that will give trigger warnings. If you can look up trigger warnings for a movie and decide not to watch it, you can look at the trigger warnings for fics and decide not to interact with it. You're not out here emailing the directors and producers of movies that include triggers you don't like, telling them they're awful people for including those things in their movie and they shouldn't. Yet you have no problem coming into the comments and inboxes creators who do this FOR FREE because we wrote one dark fic. Because we wrote something that's triggering to you.

And yes, some abuse victims go on to be abusers, some people continue that cycle because they don't have the help and support to break it. It's a sad thing that happens, but it happens. It happens in the fictional world and it happens in real life. People can make that happen to fictional characters for whatever reasons they want.

I've written dark fics. I've written several. I consume "disturbing" media for fun. I've read books and watched movies that would send these pearl clutchers to the hospital. Hell, I've probably written things (some published, some that will never see the light of day) that would turn these pearl clutchers inside out. Guess what? That's okay because it's FICTION. It's cathartic. I don't have to give my reasons why because it's no one's business except those I decide to tell because I trust them and I know they'll support me. I don't support those things in real life. Just because I write for Call of Duty doesn't mean I support the things the game portrays. If you consume Call of Duty media be it the games or fanfiction, does that mean you support what the game supports? What the creators of the games support? What militaries around the world support?

Think about that next time.

I’ve made my stance very clear here before, but I’ll do it again. In real life, I am anti military, anti war, anti gun violence, anti genocide, anti fascism, anti terf, anti homophobia, anti conservative, anti rape, anti domestic violence, anti colonialism and pro choice.

Just because I may create or consume media with those things in it, does not mean I support them. It's high time some of these pearl clutchers learn that.

The next time you want to come into a creator's inbox or comments and spew hatred towards them because of the things they write, why don't you do something useful with your time instead.

This will be my only discussion on this topic. I will not be answering any more asks like this. I will delete and block anyone who tries to come "well actually"-ing into my inbox. If you don't agree with this stance, then get off my blog and block me.

[thiscityneedslessfog]

I have to say, I want to think about my two favorite Persona 4 characters, Rise Kujikawa and Yosuke Hanamura. And I realized something:

They’re pretty similar, huh? Both Rise and Yosuke put up a cheerful front because they’re both well-known—Rise is beloved as a teen idol while Yosuke is hated for being the Junes manager’s son, but it leads to the same outcome of them having to hide a lot of themselves. I mean Jiraiya directly calls Yosuke out on it with talking about how sociable Yosuke tries to be.

And Himiko… holy shit, Himiko. She’s easily the most unnerving Shadow because she represents Rise’s sheer terror at what she’ll find if she drops the mask. Is she nothing? Is she just a doll to be played with? She’s certainly a case of Rise’s objectification by the media being internalized, and Rise’s dungeon indicates her knowledge of everyone watching her every move. I really want to talk about Rise’s dungeon in a post of its own because it’s one of my favorites and crowned Rise my favorite character!

This leads to Rise and Yosuke both being isolated from their peers and unable to make friends their age. It’s to the point that Yosuke mentions in his Rank 3 that he doesn’t change his address in hopes that his former friends will talk to him again.

And for Rise, she internalizes the mistreatment she gets. She gets brutally insulted by Himiko. Himiko mocks Rise’s desire to find someone she can let down walls around, sexualizing it like Himiko knows the people around her and Rise—her full self—would and have done. I couldn’t fit Himiko’s whole rant into this screenshot, she literally calls her a slut-shamey insult.

This leads to them latching RIGHT onto Yu Narukami when he befriends them both. They have a friend. A real, genuine friend. Yosuke had one before but she got murdered by the Midnight Channel Killer the day before he faced Jiraiya. Rise openly has a crush, and you’d be forgiven for thinking Yosuke has one too via some of his lines. Not to mention his love for Saki because she… just wasn’t an ass to him over being the Junes manager’s son. She was actually pretty great, from what you learn in Yosuke and Naoki’s social links. You find that he gets attached to pretty much anyone who tries to see past the whole “Junes manager’s son” thing, just like Rise gets attached to pretty much anyone who tries to see past the whole “Risette” thing.

They’re also both incredibly kindhearted and put others before themself, always. In Rise’s later ranks, she talks about a young girl who writes her letters, and who she always looks forward to reading, and how that girl’s happiness gave her drive to keep going even as being objectified drained her of her passion.

I mean, that girl was the final push to bring her back into showbiz, as she mentions in her epilogue rank.

And on Yosuke’s end, take some of his dungeon dialogue for example—in lower ranks of Yukiko’s, if you have both him and Yukiko off the team, she talks about part time jobs. Yosuke assumes the inn’s in a rut and immediately offers financial help.

I… guess I have a type in favorite characters, huh? I’d have to see them in comparison with my favorite characters of other works, but that’s super interesting that my favorites are so similar…

[rambosgirl]

I love your writing and you portray Rambo so well ty for all the content of him I am starving 💕💕💕🤝

If you want could I get hcs of John comforting reader on her period or how he'd deal with comforting her crying or hurt in general? Thank you sm I hope you have a nice day!! ❤🥺

Yesss I love this request! And thank you so much for the kind words and the support <333

this is just headcanons, if you want a full fic, let me know

Masterlist

John Rambo comforting you on your period HCs:

First off, John hates seeing you hurting, whether you're experiencing cramps or just stubbed your toe

He's seen too many people he cares about in pain, so it really does affect him and he wishes he could take your pain away more than anything

Speaking of pain, he knows it well and probably has a lot of training and experience with coping mechanisms for physical pain. He would probably teach you some when the body aches and cramps get really bad

But if we're being real here, he probably wouldn't know much about it at first, being around mostly men for so long. He knows the basics, but stuff like hormone levels and why you start crying out of nowhere is beyond him

But he's a fast learner if you take the time to tell him about it

He also learns how to comfort you in the way you want pretty quickly

You want snacks?? He's going to the grocery store and getting you your favorites. You want cuddles and a movie? He's a little stiff with cuddles at first but he's trying ok?? Want to use his hand as a heating pad? His answer is YES because he's a walking furnace and he knows it.

he WILL draw you a bath if you want it, he doesn't know what the candles and flower petals do, but it seems to make you happy, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

One of his love languages is 100% acts of service - he just loves doing domestic things for you <3

So he's really good about comforting you with the physical aspect of the WORST time of the month but with the emotional side? He just has less practice with that

because why are you crying again?

what do you mean you don't know?

He eventually just goes with it (he secretly finds it cute - not that you're feeling bad, just the way you look up at him when you admit you have no idea why you're sobbing)

Your brain and body works so differently than his, he actually finds it so interesting and beautiful, and he reminds you of this all the time

He definitely holds you when you cry and runs his hands through your hair, which is SUPER relaxing.

He takes your mood swings so well, he knows it's not anyone's fault (probably) it's just the hormones doing their thing

He's so respectful about it too - if you say you want company, he'll stay with you, if you say you want to be left alone, he'll leave you be, but he'll stay close enough so if you need anything from him he can help you

always reminds you that the pain will pass, he loves you, and that you are so so strong and you can make it through

[no-psi-nan]

One thing I never see people talk about is that canonically, Terusai is super one-sided...

From SAIKI'S side.

Over the course of the series, Saiki's respect for Teruhashi grows with every interaction. He bends over backwards to prevent her feelings from being hurt, he puts less and less effort into avoiding her, he looks after her safety and happiness, he risks his reputation by publicly rescuing her, he's fascinated by her beauty the one time he gets to admire her, she galvanizes him into action when he's in shock about the meteor and the "return" of his powers.

On the other hand, Teruhashi starts caring about the fake fanboy version of him she invented, and over time, grows comfortable with the fake silent glum mask he projects. She doesn't find him physically attractive and she struggles to compliment him to his grandfather. She likes how safe he makes her feel, and finds his presence comforting, but at no time does she know his actual personality, nor does she really make any real attempt to get to know him better, instead focusing on ways to impress him and make him "offu". She knows that her fanclub could put him in danger (hence tossing her chocolates out the window) but still calls on them to force him to hang out with her on multiple occasions.

In order for them to have a real relationship, Teruhashi would have to learn Saiki's actual personality and decide whether she likes it as much as the fake versions she fell in love with.

But for that to happen, Saiki would have to reveal his powers (prerequisite for showing his real personality), which would immediately force Teruhashi to face three MAJOR crises:

The INCREDIBLE mortification of blindly chasing after someone who could hear every one of her mean/rude/bizarre/thirsty thoughts and who was trying to let her down gently the whole time for SIX FUCKING YEARS, all while she made SO much trouble for him

The subsequent reckoning about what it means to be a "perfect pretty girl" after finding out someone was watching her struggle and fail at it, plus the possibility that people only like her because her beauty is a magical power like Saiki's ESP, and NOT because any inherent goodness or effort on her own behalf

The fact that her fans almost killed both Saiki and Nendo when he was "powerless", and the realization that the Kokomins (whether part of the club or not) have almost certainly hurt many people on her behalf, and that she herself has mobilized them against Saiki before. Also the fact that they actually control her almost as much as she controls them, because she has to work so hard to meet and exceed their expectations

While Saiki already knows and likes her for who she is, Teruhashi (who regularly goes to mental and physical extremes to maintain her persona) is going to have to grapple with her own sense of self before she can even really find out what Saiki's actually like, much less have a healthy relationship with him.

And meanwhile Saiki knows that dating Teruhashi would be a major risk for him, as much as he might like to, because she attracts so much attention that it would constantly risk his identity.

There's so much baggage they have to work through in canon in order to finally be on the same page, and so much to explore psychologically, especially when you remember that Teruhashi is also apparently only 5 minutes away from starting a cult based on like every canon AU hsfjdlshfks.

She's under a huge amount of stress! Has been for a long time! And then if the guy she thought she knew turned out to be a god, sometimes even The God she prays to, what's that going to do to her psyche??

Anyways this post got away from me but there's so much fertile ground for really interesting analysis and character development! But I've never seen anyone tackle any of this so I figured I'd type it up in case people didn't realize just HOW bonkers it all is lol!

[sturnzsblog]

Empty dreams and false promises 6

summary: y/n life changes and not for the best she is forced to move in with three people that she barely knows. She ends up falling for one of these strangers, but who will it be?

Warnings: mentions of death, stalking, drugs ( not actual use) and smut! this is for all parts of the story! please let me know if i missed any!

It had officially been a week since my first day of school.

Seven days of waking up early, learning the confusing layout of the hallways, meeting people I barely remembered the names of, and finding little spots of peace wherever I could—like walking to class with Mandy and Lisa, or talking with Matt about our favorite music while he drove me home.

Seven days since the garage incident. Chris hadn’t said much to me since then. And maybe that was a good thing. I didn’t know what I’d say back.

But tonight, the whole “family” sat at the massive dinner table Jimmy had set, bowls of food passed around as music played softly from the kitchen speakers. The chandelier above us flickered warmly, and for a moment, it almost felt… normal.

“How was school, Y/N?” Jimmy asked, dabbing his mouth with a napkin.

I swallowed a bite of roasted chicken and smiled. “It was actually really good today.”

Matt looked up from his plate and smiled back at me, a soft glint of pride in his eyes.

“Yeah? You finally memorized your schedule?” he teased.

“Barely,” I laughed. “But I didn’t get lost, so I’m counting it as a win.”

Jimmy nodded approvingly. “Good. Glad to hear you’re settling in.”

There was a pause, and I decided to go for it.

“Actually, I was wondering if I could invite a couple of my friends over this weekend? Just for a few hours or something casual.”

“sure honey i don’t see why not. what are there names?” he smiles happily

“mandy and lisa! there super sweet. mandy can be a bit much but she’s fun”

I had friends. Real ones. Mandy and Lisa — girls who sat with me at lunch, laughed with me in class, and actually liked me. So when I asked Jimmy at dinner if they could come over, I expected him to say yes.

which i’m happy because He did.

But not everyone was thrilled.

“Mandy and Lisa?” Matt asked, pausing with his fork halfway to his mouth.

Chris didn’t even bother to hide his reaction. He dropped his fork onto his plate with a loud clang and leaned back in his chair like the name alone gave him a headache.

“Please tell me it’s not Mandy Turner,” Chris said flatly.

I blinked. “Yeah… why?”

Jimmy adjusted his glasses. “Y/N, she’s not exactly known for being… the most stable girl in town.”

���She stalked this house for months,” Chris said, voice colder now. “Used to sit outside the gate in her mom’s minivan just staring. I caught her once, like full-on hiding behind the hedge.”

“She was just a kid,” I said, trying to keep my voice steady. “People do stupid things. That doesn’t mean she’s like that now.”

Matt shot Chris a look like he was trying to silently calm him down, but Chris ignored it.

“I told you already,” Chris said sharply. “She’s trouble.”

“I already invited her,” I muttered.

Chris clenched his jaw. “Of course you did.”

⸻

Later That Night

When the doorbell rang, I didn’t hesitate.

Mandy stood on the porch looking like she stepped out of a catalog — perfect curls, tight dress, sparkly heels that didn’t match the casual vibe at all. Lisa stood beside her in sneakers and jeans, clearly more comfortable.

“This place is insane,” Mandy said, stepping inside with wide eyes. “Like, what?! You live here?”

“Yeah,” I said, already regretting this. “Come on in.”

They followed me into the living room, gushing over everything. The gold-trimmed staircase. The massive chandelier. The freaking indoor fountain like it wasn’t completely unnecessary.

“You live with Chris Sturniolo?” Mandy asked, eyes lit up. “You didn’t tell me that part.”

I cringed. “I didn’t think it mattered.”

Lisa laughed, plopping down on the couch. “To Mandy it definitely does.”

Mandy smirked and flopped beside her, already making herself at home. “I used to be so obsessed with him. I followed him through Whole Foods once just to see what kind of milk he drinks.”

I stared at her. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope,” she said proudly. “Almond, if you’re curious.”

Lisa snorted, but I didn’t laugh.

Something about the way Mandy spoke — so careless, so intense — started to bother me.

“He’s so hot though,” she said, picking at the popcorn bowl. “Like, in a way that makes you want to do stupid things. If I lived here, I’d be sneaking into his room at night.”

“Okay…” I muttered.

“I’d let him ruin me,” she said casually, like she was reading from a menu. “God, I bet he’s mean in bed. Those are the best ones.”

“Alright, that’s enough,” I snapped, standing up. “You need to go.”

Mandy blinked, shocked. “What?”

“You’re crossing a line,” I said firmly. “You’re in his house, talking about him like he’s some object. It’s gross. Lisa, you can stay if you want. But Mandy? You need to leave.”

Lisa looked between us, clearly uncomfortable. Mandy, on the other hand, stood up slow — her lips parted in a smirk.

“Wow. Getting protective now?” she mocked. “You barely even know him.”

“I don’t have to know him to know you’re being disrespectful.”

“I bet you’re just mad I said it out loud,” she said, stepping closer. “You probably want him too.”

Before I could reply, heavy footsteps echoed from upstairs.

Chris.

He came down the stairs fast, in sweats and a hoodie, eyes locked on Mandy like he’d heard every word.

“What the hell is going on?” he asked, voice low and sharp.

Mandy straightened, like she wanted to pose for him. “We were just talking—”

“No. You were running your mouth,” he snapped. “I told you to stay away from this house. And you’re back here talking about sneaking into my room?”

Mandy’s face went pale.

“Get out,” Chris said, pointing at the door.

“You don’t have to be such an asshole,” she muttered.

“I told her,” he growled, turning on me. “Didn’t I tell you? I fucking told you not to bring her here.”

I took a step back, stunned by the sudden heat in his voice. “Chris, I—”

“Next time,” he said, voice raised, “listen. Yeah?”

The room was so quiet I could hear Lisa’s soft breathing. I didn’t reply. I couldn’t. His words felt like a slap, and all I could do was stare at the floor, blinking back the sting in my eyes.

Mandy stormed out, Lisa following awkwardly, whispering an apology as she passed.

The door slammed.

Chris stood in the middle of the room, chest rising and falling hard, like he didn’t even mean to yell—like he was just as pissed at himself as he was at me.

But I didn’t care.

I turned and walked straight to my room.

Slammed the door behind me.

And for the first time since moving here…

I really wanted to go home.

hey, i kinda love mean chris?

Janae 💋

[pastafossa]

hi pasta ! i’ve been a long time fan of you and your work, your writing is by far my favorite so far for matt that you’ve reignited me to write fanfics again ! i think you’re incredibly talented and so smart in your way of designing a story so vividly it just sparked my desire to to create again after my 30th reread of TRT. it is totally okay if you choose not to answer these but i have a couple of questions for writers? i have written fanfics before but they never came out to my liking (i never published them😅) so i’m looking to improve it and better my understanding of creating content that i like and am proud of!

the questions !! :

what are some things and tricks to writing lively, real dialogue? i find when i write sometimes my characters seem dull and cardboard like. i want it to flow naturally god dammit !

how do you go about characterization and staying true to it as your character develop and evolve? and to riff off of this question what is some additional research you would do to get the nature of your chosen character (ex, matt) right?

what are ways to better your writing? for example highlighting a characters complex emotions, describing the scenery around, detailed fight scenes and car chases, etc, etc. and not just them but silly grammatical errors and simple vocab. (i’m trilingual so it get a bit fuzzy remember all the rules of every language 😭) your foreshadowing game is just chefs kiss cuz you would sit on something and brush past it but it’ll make its comeback 20 chaps later, HOW??

and lastly, what is your advice to planning a long story? what are some steps you take to je respect the timeline of a show or a movie and how do you fit your OC into it? as well as making the OC’s backstory fit in. speaking of backstory and lore, i find it so hard to fit in believable, human lore to my OC and not make it super childish. i think you did such an interesting job with project beagle, the antagonist, the body swapping, the symbolism, etc, that it just feel so canon to me.

well thats all i have to ask, i hope it’s not too much, you really are such an awesome artist and i admire your work as a writer so much! thank you for sharing your stories on here/ao3. ❤️

Oh my gosh, this is so sweet! I'm absolutely gd honored you love TRT this much, I'm so, so happy it could help make you want to write fic again! 😭😭😭 Seriously, one of the things that just makes me absolutely delighted is when something I've made could lead to more things being made in turn, cause I don't just love Matt and Daredevil and TRT, I love stories in general! The world needs more of them, so this is FUCKING AWESOME. And I'm happy to answer these questions as best I can!

I'm also going to put this behind a see-more tag cause it's long LOL.

Token Matt gif just for fun. LET'S GET STARTED.

Natural, lively dialogue: Ooooh this is a fun question I haven't gotten asked before I don't think. I won't lie, part of it absolutely the immersion with all the shows, movies, and books I take in. But there's another element I was taught in creative writing classes - the idea that sometimes you should read as a writer. That is: read while asking yourself, 'how did they do that? Why? How did they foreshadow this?' Etc. You can do the same thing with characters speaking and with people. Listen to how these characters speak, how similar people speak, and try to get a feel for how they talk. I'll use contractions as an example. Most people use contractions, for example (at least in the US), in natural flowing dialogue. It's shorter, it's more casual, whereas they might speak more formally (less contractions) in a professional setting like a courtroom or when they're really angry and speaking somewhat threateningly. They also might not use contractions for other reasons - in TRT Ciro tends to use fewer contractions when speaking English, both because he's a classy guy and because English isn't his native language (he learned it more formally). I also try to treat each character as having their own natural accent (which can also show a bit of their personality). Matt rambles when he's nervous, but his dialogue gets sharp and choppy when he's furious (Devil wants to act, not talk). Foggy loves metaphors and has a lot of swings up and down in tone for emphasis (Grew up a theatre kid). When Jane in TRT is feeling particularly cold, she starts dropping unnecessary words from her sentences so they're shorter (more efficient + trained to give immediate answers without flourish). Sometimes it can also help to listen to the dialogue you write or have it go through a text-to-speech program so you can hear if it sounds stilted, but I've found the ability to detect stilted dialogue is just something you have to practice!

Keeping true to the character while letting them evolve: this is ALSO A FUN QUESTION. Especially because something I was taught is that, generally speaking (always exceptions): a stagnant character is a boring character. They need to struggle with who they are, and grow or devolve as a person. They need to learn. I knew I wanted that to happen in TRT, so yeah, a big question was how I could show characters growing while also keeping them the characters we know and love. And for me it was about figuring out what the basic building blocks of those characters were, and making sure they were always present, because an apple pie should always, in theory, come out of the oven an apple pie, even if it's been changed some by baking. Things like Matt's struggle with his faith, the way he's sorta incapable of finding a middle ground between Devil and Matt Murdock, his refusal to ignore injustice, his trauma and fear of abandonment, his love of the Kitchen, his anger issues and the ensuing impulsivity, these are all building blocks for him. These do not change. What changes is how they manifest, and what he does with them. Matt learns he can trust Jane with his trauma and fear of abandonment. She helps calm his anger. The building blocks are all still there. Some of them just get arranged a little differently as he grows. Same with Jane and how she has grown. She's always going to have Hound Mode floating around in the back of her head. Security will always be her biggest concern, her motivator. She's always going to be the one who prefers to think and plan. She'll always feel a little weird about personal identity, and be able to flip through lies and false faces with the best of them. But she'll handle all of that differently as she grows alongside Matt. The plot is baking them, changing those pies in the oven, but their base ingredients are something I'm super careful to keep consistent. That I think is one of my secrets since this has been going on 8 years now!

Additional research for characterization: I am always, always, always going to recommend good psychology research (I loved this shit in college, especially developmental psychology, and fortunately there's a TON that's easily accessible online and doesn't require any classes). For Matt, that would be psychological things like... what does repeated abandonment do to a person when they're a kid? How does abandonment and parental loss shape their attachment styles and relationships later in life (hint: it's not great)? We know he has untreated depression, so what's going on in his brain considering he's pushing all that down? What would the day-to-day struggle being exposed to all that crime and pain do (research into things like the mental health of paramedics and social workers, etc)? Dissect these characters like little bugs, put them on your table, and try to figure out why someone would do what they do. Be curious, basically!

How To Improve In General: I LOVE THAT YOU BROUGHT UP MY FORESHADOWING FIRST OFF, I'LL ANSWER THAT IN THE NEXT BIT FOR PLANNING BUT. For me this is a couple things. The biggest one is reading, reading, reading. Read professional stuff in addition to fanfic. Read in your chosen genre. Read writers you want to write like! Read writers who are writing what you want to learn! And when you do, ask yourself how they did what you want to do. I have one book series that's my absolute favorite, I've read it over and over and over again. And it's very likely that someone who's read that book series and TRT would be able to spot the influence that book series has had on Jane's character voice, how I write action scenes, morally grey characters, etc. So that's where some of it comes from! For things like detailed emotions and sensations, my favorite book is The Emotion Thesaurus! I've found I don't need it as much now because I've gotten the hang of it, but it's still good to have there as a refresher. And for things like grammar and simple vocab, not only will reading help, but I'd also open the door to any fandom friends who might beta read for you! I've been writing fic since I was... hrrgh, quite young. And I'm super grateful for the betas over the years that would go over my fic and leave notes - notes not just on what they had changed but why: why they changed this punctuation, why they broke up this sentence, why they capitalized this or lower-cased that. That helped a ton! But yeah, when in doubt, grab an author you love and open it up and go, '...Ok, so how did you do this???' Also holy hell, you're triilingual so you already get a TON of kudos here on learning how multiple languages work, YOU GOT THIS.

Planning a long story: now's the part where I make people groan but the biggest advice is to outline, I know a ton of us heard it in school and ignored it because pfft but THE OUTLINE REALLY IS IMPORTANT. This is how I was able to foreshadow things ages in advance - I knew what was coming in the future so I was able to leave breadcrumbs earlier on. This also meant I was able to figure out how certain dominoes would tip (like when TRT's original plotlines would change something in canon) or when there were gaps in Daredevil's timeline that I could neatly settle into. Knowing the entirety of the story and having it all laid out also meant it was easier to change things or work to make sure TRT fit into the Daredevil/Marvel Universe like a puzzle piece. That was one of the steps for me both when it came to respecting the timeline (not that you need to! That was a personal choice for me) and with making sure the lore all fit in. I love the Marvel universe, have since I was a kid, so I was able to tap some of their fun recurring tropes and themes (Evil scientists, secret government projects, Mutants/Enhanced characters in hiding) and instead of trying to make it new, I tried to do my own spin on it instead because I know this sort of thing already exists there, and threw in some of the other general genre tropes I enjoy (love me some symbolic otherworlds and psychic connections). I think for an OC like this, that's sort of the key. Their backstories will fit because they're built on power structures and building blocks that already exist. It's just about finding a little section that hasn't been told yet. That's where this type of OC flourishes: in these little gaps between walls and load-bearing pillars, a story and character you wouldn't find all that unusual if they popped up as a side character in canon, all to explore some part of the world that hasn't really been fleshed out yet. AND if desired, I think there's something to be said for matching just how grounded/fantastical your show/movie is. Daredevil is very, very grounded. People get hurt. They die. These aren't Avengers-level Gods who can take a lightning strike. So I respected that with Jane, who gets hurt... fairly often, tbh. I also leaned into, yet again, a story gap in that while a lot of the people running around with the Devil (Frank, Elektra, Stick, Jess and Luke, etc) are GOOD at fighting, Jane's specialty is NOT fighting, generally, even if she's pretty damn good with a gun and quick with her knife. Her specialty is getting away, so it gives us new things to explore in terms of threats and fight scenes!

I hope all of this helps! Everyone gets better with practice, so don't be afraid to put your stuff out there! God knows I've got old fanfic floating around the internet, and a lot of my early stuff wasn't anywhere near what TRT is. But I also couldn't have gotten to TRT without writing it, posting it, and learning from it. <3

[whorejolras]

Happy International Whores’ Day from your favourite whorejolras

What’s International Whores’ Day? Is that real? Yes!

Today is the 50th anniversary of the sex worker occupation of a Saint-Nizier Church in Lyon, France. Workers banded together on June 2nd to occupy the church for eight days to protest against the criminalisation of sex work (though it was technically “legalised” they still faced fines, police violence, and arrests) and unsafe working conditions created by the laws and policing in place.

Today while we remember and honour generations of workers who have fought for the safety and decriminalisation of sex work, and for our right to live free of stigma and discrimination, I am also feeling some more personal feelings about my place here as an out sex worker in this lil les mis fandom, how far we’ve come in two short years.

I was super apprehensive about outing myself when I rejoined les mis fandom space, but wanted to do it to try to challenge the attitude and hopefully make it safer for those who come after me, even when just engaging with silly little fandom spaces. Because it might be silly and small but it is significant to me for myself and other workers to be able to relax and enjoy the things we enjoy and let our guard down in our down time without being smacked in the face by stigma and discrimination and hurtful takes on things we live.

It was especially frustrating when engaging with a piece of media that depicts sex work in a nuanced, historical, and sometimes accurate but also sometimes deeply misunderstood way. It was frustrating to see people who politically agree with the themes of the novel and musical - prison abolition, political uprisings, power to the working class - and still shit on sex workers and argue with me about legalisation and criminalisation. It was fucking insulting to see people use language about a sex working character in the novel that dehumanises both her and sex workers reading their analysis.

But I’m so glad I did, that I made this page and joined communities like les mis letters, where I really felt heard and held in understanding by people who were genuinely learning from what I had to say. I’ve been so proud to see ongoing policies put in place to strive to make them safer for sex workers. I especially want to thank mod @secretmellowblog for the good work done there.

I’m so glad I decided to incorporate my own sex worker headcanons into my writing, and that this has connected me to readers who have felt seen and relieved to see a realistic and normal depiction of sex work, free from stigma and harmful stereotypes.

I am so, so, so fucking glad I created les mis if fantine had a gun on discord. In trying to make a server where sex worker sensitivity was at the core of our ethos, we made a space that has allowed so many people who I absolutely adore to learn and grow and engage with things like sexuality, as a whole and their own, gender expression, politics, drugs and harm reduction, even just sex ed and skill sharing, in an open and positive way. I am so so so proud of the people I’ve met and come to love in this space.

I knew in my heart that although a small percent of people here are bigoted, a lot of people simply didn’t know better. I believed - even when I doubted it - that if I could just be loud enough and talk to enough people and keep posting my bullshit (and occasionally get frustrated and go off at the people who said hurtful things) that maybe things could get like 5% better on this little corner of the internet.

All I wanted for myself was to be able to relax and enjoy my doomed yaoi without being hit by whorephobia every two seconds. What I’ve started, and what you’ve helped me do, is so much fucking better than that. ILY guys. Happy International Whores’ Day.

-

You can read more about IWD here.

And here. And here.

[lady-griffin]

I’ve not seen the movie and I don’t ever intend to - but I have to ask, what’s the point of making Nani want to be a marine biologist?

Because from where I’m standing, it seems like the creators of this remake didn’t think og Nani was admirable enough or worth rooting for, so they made this change to her (which feels very elitist and gross to me) as well as use it to be this flimsy excuse to justify separating the sisters, so everyone “wins” and gets what they “want.”

And the thing is, I don’t think Nani wanting to be a marine biologist is this inherently bad idea; I feel like it could’ve worked in so many different ways if that character change had actually been willing to you know impact the character of Nani and the story, she’s in.

Was one of their parents a scientist? Specifically, a marine biologist? Were both of them scientists?

Does Nani have specific happy memories doing little science experiments with her parents or collecting sea samples and just studying the world and her home?

Is Nani curious and fascinated by anything new and simply wants to learn and explore the world? Does she want to protect marine life? Is she interested in a specific species? Or is she just more interested in studying and gathering data and making sense of the world around her?

Is one of the reasons Nani struggles with keeping down a job is because she’s deeply unhappy in these jobs that don't challenge or engage with her on an intellectual level? That could’ve been a good connection between her and Lilo.

Or do all these jobs she currently qualifies for are part of the tourism industry which Nani has her own issues with because of her love and interest in marine life? Does she feel like tourism negatively impacts her home on that level? Does she feel stifled and limited in these jobs, but she can’t let it show (especially not to Lilo) because she needs a job to keep Lilo and that’s more important to her?

Is marine biology something she can bond over and share with Lilo? Or does it slightly put them in conflict?

In the original movie, Lilo felt like she couldn’t give Pudge a tuna sandwich because that would make her a monster, but Nani could be like – fish eat other fish all the time, Lilo, it’s fine. That’s how the world works. Or is Nani like, Lilo you can’t give this fish a peanut butter sandwich but since Pudge is this type of fish his diet would consist of this and this. And in doing that we see a compromise between the sisters or is Lilo still against it, because to make Pudge happy she knows he has to have a peanut butter sandwich?

Does Nani’s love for marine biology help her encourage and support Lilo’s love and interest in things? Or is this something that might make it hard for her to relate to Lilo, but despite the struggle, she still makes sure to give Lilo what she needs, even if she doesn’t fully get it herself?

Is Nani specifically interested in this really absurd marine life aspect that most people wouldn’t even know about let alone think is cool or worthwhile; and yet we see how much Nani loves this one thing? You could’ve had a story element of how Nani herself doesn’t quite fit in as her real self, which is just another layer onto why she’s so fiercely protective over Lilo and makes sure Lilo doesn’t feel the need to change who she is.

Do we see how much Lilo loves and admires her sister when we see Nani get super passionate about this thing that she apparently loves so much that it’s more important to her than staying with Lilo? Is Nani giving up her dream an added level of guilt for Lilo and makes her think she ruins everything and Nani would be better off with a rabbit?

Is this ever used as a starting off point for a sad, quiet moment between Lilo and Stitch? Where Lilo says she knows she’s keeping Stitch away from who he wants to be, just like she’s doing Nani. And we see how this little girl is far more mature than we initially gave her credit for but at the time, she’s also just this little kid, who doesn’t fully understand that Nani needs Lilo as much a Lilo needs Nani?

Lilo finds comfort in creativity and stories. Pudge the fish is a great example of that, but going further we also saw in the og movie that creativity was a healthy outlet for Lilo and aside from her not being an experiment designed to only destroy, Lilo’s creativity is something that differentiates her from Stitch. We saw how one of the keys to Stitch changing is Lilo telling him to create rather than destroy and he starts with creating a mini San Fransico (to destroy) but later she also teaches him how to dance (something he enjoyed).

Is Nani’s interest in marine biology, used to contrast with that side of Lilo? Because unlike her sister, Nani doesn’t find comfort and solace in creativity and stories, but instead facts and logic.

Is she at all curious about this animal that is in no way a dog? Does she think Stitch is some kind of unknown, undiscovered species or perhaps a native Hawaiian species once thought extinct?

Does she have any desire to figure out Stitch? Either out of simple curiosity or because she has no idea what he is and she needs facts to make sense of what’s happening?

Is marine biology used at all to parallel or contrast Nani to Pleakley, who in the real movie was passionate about protecting the mosquito population? Seriously, Nani and Pleakley having a similarity in wanting to protect endangered species could have been an interesting change.

Or is Nani being a scientist used as a way to contrast her to the unredeemed mad scientist of Jumba and she’s an example of what a scientist should be like, unlike him?

Does Stitch learn something about himself and others in seeing how Nani acts and uses science versus Jumba?

Like when Jumba wants to learn about something he takes it apart and doesn’t care about the damage he does, while Nani leaves the thing alone and studies it carefully, making sure to leave as little impact on the wildlife as she can.

While Gantu is not in this insulting remake, this changed to Nani could've been used to show her contrasting with him and his worldview.

Gantu had never seen anything like Stitch and he immediately wanted to destroy Stitch, and think he’s this vile, flawed thing. While in contrast, maybe because of her background with marine biology, Nani just sees Stitch as another life, no less deserving than any other.

I can think of so many different possibilities of how Nani wanting to be a marine biologist could’ve been used to add a different layer to the story or take it in a new direction that doesn’t insult the original movie – but from what I’ve heard, the movie doesn’t do any of that.

So, what’s the point of making this change if you’re not actually going to use it to change the character in a way that enhances your story and themes?