#because i always have this itch to edit again and again lol

[ginnsbaker]

the cheap printing service i got online just sent me a preview of ILGOSS and even though the softbound is not perfect, i'm in love with it T_T

[repulsiveliquidation]

Did I Cross The Line? || Alexia Putellas

warnings : angst. i am not entirely happy with it but if I kept editing, it would only become worse lol. Loosely inspired by the meaning of ‘Wildflower’ by Billie Eilish.

summary : There were two people to love. Alexia could only have one.

You started off as best friends. Two peas in a pod. One never without the other. You and Alexia were never seen apart from each other. Her mother was like your mother, and vice versa. Both families were like one big one all because Alexia decided she wanted to be friends with you at 4 years old and she kicked a football at you in kindergarten. 

You cried, of course, and she got so scared when the teacher scolded her and called her mother to school for it. She sheepishly apologized and when you accepted it, she kissed your cheek where the ball smacked you. 

“Mami always kisses my booboos so they feel better faster!” 

“Really? My mami does too…” 

A football to the face was the price you paid for a girl whom you would give your life for. 

That was until Jenni came along. 

Alexia looked at her differently. It was new. She’d never been this happy in a relationship before and you could not have been happier for your best friend. 

Alexia was someone who loved her friends. She wasn’t shy to show her affection and to boldly display her feelings. You were more reserved and outwardly didn’t like it when she was being touchy. 

Deep down though, her touch brought calm to your storm. You were always anxious before games and Alexia knew this; she made sure to stand beside you and hold your hand to squeeze three times before you left the tunnel. 

Today, Alexia stood beside you in the tunnel, chatting away to Jenni who was only half listening. Your hands shook with adrenaline and fear, palms itching to reach for Alexia’s hand to calm you down. 

The kind of friend she was to you showed itself in times like these. She could feel the fear radiating off you and without even looking back at you, her hand reaches for yours and you feel your body relax and react to the heat from her palm. 

“You okay? You look pale,” she whispers, looking concerned at you. You look up at her slightly taller figure and nod, gripping her hand tighter. 

“Fine, just nervous for the big game,” you lie, hoping she didn’t see the slight bit of jealousy that creeped into your head. 

“You’ll be fine, hermana, we’ll win this.” 

You nod again, feeling sweat on your brow. She squeezes your hand three times and faces forwards, walking out while you follow. The game went smoothly and you sailed to a 3-0 win easy peasy. 

At training a few days later, you arrive at the changing room a little energized only to be met with screaming. 

You stood at the door and listened carefully, not wanting to interrupt anyone when you recognized the voice yelling her head off. 

Alexia was yelling. 

“She’s my best fucking friend, how could you make me choose?!” 

“Well, she’s all you talk about! If I wanted to know her, I would have wanted to date her instead of you!” 

“You’re not good enough for her!” 

“I’m not good enough?” Jenni laughs, “You’re the one who got rejected when told her I love you while piss fucking drunk! May I add that we were already dating at that point; I knew you loved her and not me!”

”How dare you?!” 

You hear bags being zipped and boots clamoring all over the changing room. Alexia storms out of the room and you back away from the door just in time. She doesn’t even see you standing there pretending you didn’t hear them, seeing Jenni try to run after. She, unlike Alexia, notices you standing there looking like a deer in headlights. 

“Speak of the devil,” Jenni quips mockingly, “you were listening weren’t you?” 

“You didn’t make it hard not to,” you say as you roll your eyes, pushing past Jenni to put your kit bag in your cubby and run after Alexia. 

“Ale!” You call, running through the stadium looking for your best friend. She’s sobbing in her car, crying more when you knock on the passenger window gently. The doors unlock and you quietly climb in. 

“You heard.” 

“I didn’t get there in time to hear all of it, no.”  

“Jenni’s leaving,” Alexia takes a deep breath to stop herself from crying before she continues, “and she’s asked me to come with her.” 

“Why did you say no?” 

The tears start to flow again and she cries harder, now unable to catch her breath. She grabs the steering wheel and still can’t breathe so you take her hands in yours and hope she calms like you do. 

Her panic attack exhausts her and she’s in no condition to drive. A quick text to the group chat and you’ve got both your bags in her car and are on the way to her house. She’s passed out in the passenger seat and snoring a little, still holding your hand in the center console. 

Your hand holding hers feels familiar and comfortable. You’re sure she’s passed out and can’t really feel anything but unbeknownst to you, she was quite aware of her surroundings and knew she was close to home. 

Close to you. 

You really don’t want to wake her but you’ve pulled into her driveway and can hear dogs barking so you tap on her shoulder gently. You’re tempted to kiss the back of her hand but you refrain from it, feeling the restraint tug at your heart. 

She rouses and smiles softly at you, eyes puffy and nose red. She shuffles into the house with you right behind her. 

You make yourself at home, brewing two cups of tea. It fills the house with a lovely smell of jasmine, which eases your anxiety. She takes a mug from you, eyes filling with fresh tears. Her body shakes with fear, brain in overdrive. 

She was always open with you. But this time, her lips stayed sealed. It broke your heart. 

“Alexia, talk to me,” you whisper, eyes searching for hers. She doesn’t look at you, teary eyes instead glued to the floor. 

She sips the tea and it burns her tongue, the sudden rush of pain makes the tears she was fighting with win. They stain her cheeks and reveal her true feelings. 

She loved you. 

And she has for longer than she cares to admit. 

Dating Jenni was just an attempt at denying her feelings. She loved you. But she loved Jenni too. 

It was like she was having an out of body experience. She was sitting right in front of you and she had never seen like you she did right this second. But she knew now that she did in fact see you this way. 

She looked at you differently from Jenni. She took care of you differently from Jenni. She saw you differently from Jenni. She may have loved both of you, but there was a clear difference. 

She did those things differently because she loved you differently. 

She didn’t know you felt the same. You loved Alexia too. Boy did your heart break when they first got together. You wanted to break things she got you. You couldn’t wear her clothes you had in your closet anymore. You pulled away when all you wanted to do was crawl into her skin. 

You had to lie that day at the bar. You had to break her heart. She loved someone else didn’t she? You couldn’t let her be hung up on someone like you when she had someone like Jenni begging for her attention. 

She was La Reina. Two time Ballon d’Or winner. Queen of FC Barcelona. 

You were just…you. 

“I love you!” Alexia yells; fresh hot tears stream down her face. She looked like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. There was a clear release of tension in the room and it was magical.

When her lips touched yours, there were feelings shared that could be left unsaid. Feelings only the two of you needed to know. She loved Jenni, and there was a conversation to be had tomorrow but for today, she had all that she needed to make it through the night. And quite possibly the rest of her life. 

Alexia pulled you into her lap, hands resting on your waist in a deathly grip, clearly afraid you’d just disappear into thin air. 

“I love you too,” you whispered against her lips, feeling her perfect smile adorn her face again. 

As Alexia held you in her arms the rest of the night, you realized something. You were not just…you. 

You were the girl who took a ball to the face like a champ, though it left your cheek bruised for days, all because a 4 year old was too shy to say hello. 

You were the girl who fought a boy twice your size when he tackled Alexia dangerously. 

You were the girl who walked in and out of her house like it was your own. 

You were the girl so scared of walking out onto the pitch you needed your best friend to hold your hand. 

You were the girl Alexia, from the moment she laid her eyes on you at the kindergarten playground, wanted to be friends with her entire life. 

You were wanted, needed and cherished by your best friend. But there was more, so much more left for you to uncover. 

Was the next step in your relationship a line you wanted to cross? 

“Alexia?” you asked, looking back at her. She was smiling and you felt your heart melt. But you remained steadfast. 

“Sí?”

“What are you going to say to Jenni?” 

Alexia’s smile dropped, her arms around you slacked and her face turned into fear. 

What was she going to say to Jenni? She was going to break her heart for sure but what would be the right words? Were there the right words to tell your girlfriend you loved someone else and you were only with her because you were in denial? 

The night dragged on that day, on one hand you were over the moon to have Alexia to yourself but you felt bad for Jenni who was also a close friend, knowing she was in for a day she would want over as fast as possible tomorrow. 

“Jenni, just listen to me, please!” 

“There’s nothing to listen to, you’re in love with her and not me. Moving away was a good idea, that way I won’t be a constant reminder of a barrier in your relationship,” Jenni says calmly, standing right in front of the door outside the changing room. She turns, a pained smile on her face. 

“You two deserve each other. Please don’t break her heart like you did mine.” 

Alexia asked you to wait outside and you did, trying your best not to eavesdrop like before. Jenni walks out and you can see how hard she’s trying not to cry. She sees you and sits beside you, an awkward silence in the air. There was a war going on inside you, one that made your anxiety skyrocket. You were shaking, sweat building up on your brow. You tried to hold your own hand to no avail. It was nothing like Alexia’s palm in yours. 

Jenni takes your sweaty palm and rubs the back with her other. 

“Please don’t feel like this is your fault,” she starts, looking at your hand in hers. “We were having problems from the start. She has always loved you in a way that was reserved only for you.” 

You look at her and tears of your own begin to prickle. You felt bad for her; you should be comforting her since she was the one affected by all this and yet here she was comforting you. 

“Jenni…” 

“No, please. She loved me,” she pauses, taking a deep breath, “but she loved you more. More than anything in this world. She told me she was terrified of losing you when we got together. She was always your girl. She was never mine to love.” 

Jenni stands, leaving your hand in your lap and using hers to wipe her tears. 

“She always wished I was you," Jenni says, taking a deep breath, "now she’s got her wish. I just hope she doesn't regret it.”

[petratherrock]

Rewatched the anime again after having a 14794372th reread of the manga and idk why this scene always stuck with me, I remember all the dialogues word by word

Edit : another reason i forgot to mention, it's because the intonation and japanese dialogue is just so...ear candy. Pleasant to my ears lol. Honey's intonation and voice in particular scratches the itch in my brain. Yes I'm that kind of person that'll keep repeating a scene if the voice and intonation sounds pleasing to my ears

I mean among other things, this entire scene just kinda sums up their relationship with Haruhi

There's Tamaki who was worried about Haruhi and wanted her to understand why he was mad at her for not asking for help from the other guys before jumping the jerks at the beach

There's Kyoya who's just silently there, and assisted Tamaki to his room at the end lol because this doesn't really concern him emotionally, but I bet he was concerned too. He's just not as expressive as the others

Honey being the mediator in this situation is so endearing because he's the one who can slow talk it and make Haruhi understand why Tamaki was mad and that they we all were worried abt her safety. Honey is just generally very adorable too!! I love his Japanese va sm, the way she makes Honey sounds so adorable even while he's advising Haruhi and just speaking in general !!! (Momiji Furuba va!!)

The twins laying it out for Haruhi that they were as worried as Tamaki as well and then sighing when Haruhi belatedly realized that they were worried about her safety and not mad because she was a burden to them

Then there's Mori. He may not have a lot to say but he's always there lol. This guy just be standing with his crab with the others squeezing Haruhi. He's that moral support friend xD you can rely on him to be there alright

And also Haruhi's pun. In english, she basically said 'this crab is in-crab-ible' 🤣 she just be punning it out, all while annoyed at Tamaki

[jessiemeows]

have today off bc I have to do a lot of errands at home and I went ahead and stayed up all night finishing the damn game bc I'm insane. I have never seen this scene in my life, as I always free Orpheus. Dare I say........... I will probably no longer be freeing Orpheus. I enjoy this scene much more. Which totally sucks because I HATE the emperor lmfao. I played on balance mode for this because I usually have everyone in my party but since I only had my main four I thought it would be much more difficult, spoilers it was not. I probably could have played on tactician mode but since I also have mods that make it basically honor mode it may have been far harder, who knows. Whenever I play this game again I will probably try to only play with four people, I just enjoy the banter with everyone but I hate how having everyone ruins certain cutscenes :/ I say whenever I play this game again as I'm already itching to replay because I feel empty without it.

Also, why does the brain call Astarion a lord? I didn't ascend him.. Maybe it knew we had 160k gold coins which I guess does make us a lord and lady if we bought estates and stuff which I know damn well Astarion did end up doing. At least in my headcannon, he did. In my head they own 3 different properties, a small house is in the lower city near the Bloomridge area (which is known to be a wealthier area for the lower city), a medium sized property in the upper city between the Wide and the Temples district probably a little smaller than Lady Jannath's Estate, and lastly probably a very large property basically a mansion with a farm and vineyard a few miles away from the outer city that is surrounding the upper city. I have reasons why he would get all these and one day maybe I'll share when I'm not half asleep and delusional. I do have a personal fic i wrote a bit for myself but if I wanted to write all of it out the fic would probably be 900 chapters.

Sorry for whoever is reading this I'm a bit ranty because I'm exhausted being awake for 19 hours lmfao.

My main four are usually my Durge, Astarion, Shadowheart and Gale for some reason they are my favorite to play with. :) Also enjoy my durgey saving Astarion from a tentacle I couldn't edit that bit out lmfao. Anyways goodnight lol.

[gayloraura]

i’ve been itching to try and actually figure stuff out in regards to my “take folklore and run with it” thing for a while now, so yesterday i sat down with a blank notebook and started writing in it. the structure is sort of inspired by videos about commonplace books that i’ve watched in the last week or so, but i’m definitely not using it like people typically use commonplace books lol.

i have a “goal” section at the front (after a few pages of blank space for an index), but it’s turned into more of an overview. just stuff about what core characters there are and where they came from, James’ gender (~ambiguous~), what i’ve decided about the town they live in, etc.

then i went through all of betty (the song) and dissected it, basically. starting with a more “swiftie” POV where James and Betty are already in a relationship, he just fully cheated on her, and now he’s begging her to take him back. i got very critical of James here, i understand why swifties hate him so viscerally. to quote myself: (in regards to the second verse) “where it went wrong was when you cheated on her, you prick”.

i decided there was no way i was going with that narrative as it was - James is really painted as an asshole and it would be difficult to find myself wanting them to be together, if i wanted to make a bunch of other songs about them (which is the entire goal of this project, obviously). so i also wrote down my “alternate interpretation”, which more or less the narrative that i originally had in my head when i first heard the song and had no context all. i’m just gonna put everything that i wrote here because this is my favourite part. (with some grammar & vocab edits, because i can properly do that in a digital medium)

James and Betty are in an extremely homoerotic friendship/situationship, and the song is them (mostly James) trying navigate that while also dealing with a homophobic environment.

Inez’s gossip would be more along the lines of “i saw them doing gay stuff with this random girl”.

“the worst thing i ever did” on its own makes me think of some brutal internalized homophobia, but then we get to the second line and it follows up with “was what i did to you”. like it’s been flipped on its head and James knows that it hurt Betty a lot in couple different ways, so they’re saying “it was the worst thing i ever did because it hurt you, not because it was gay”. (i had a bit trouble phrasing that, so hopefully it’s understandable)

the reason James went along with the affair because they were frustrated with the status of the situationship and wanted to get their mind off of Betty. obviously that didn’t work, and they thought about her the entire time. this part is not much different from the vanilla interpretation, but the main difference is that they weren’t official (or even approaching that), so James looks much less like an asshole.

a point i had always been confused about the vanilla interpretation - i might have just been overthinking it, but whatever the case it helps to have an interpretation that makes sense to me. in the bridge, James says he dreams about kissing her (which i always thought kind of sounded like they never had before), but then at the end says “kissing in my car again” (so they have?). i thought it would make sense if in this “alternate” one, they had kissed once (in James’ car), and it made things awkward. maybe shortly before things got weird?

“stupid friends” is an insult to injury for swifties. for me, it means the friends are stupid because they’re homophobic (christians?) like the rest of the school and town (which is great framing for other songs like Love Story). when James says “will you kiss me in front of all your stupid friends”, they’re basically saying “will you care what they think? will you want to be with me out in the open?”. they don’t want to be shoved back into the closet now that they’ve been outed.

lastly, this is more of a nitpick. i’ve always found it strange that a 2 teenagers of the opposite sex would be allowed to spend the night together - i would understand sneaking out (or in?) on occasion, but the song makes it sound like it’s most of the summer. it makes way more sense to me if it was 2 (perceived) girls having sleepovers or something.

[mlobsters]

dad in the garden

acrylic on canvas board 11x8" - painting video below

the sound is something i yoinked from a website that used it as background noise, i couldn't track down the original source but it's labeled summer sounds with wind chimes.

my favorite picture of my dad, he died when I was 16. this is <1991 (we moved from this house when I was 11) but I don't know exactly when. he wasn't home much because he traveled for work and I have a really poor memory, so I have an especially strong fondness for pictures. I don't remember a lot of events but I can remember the picture.

to say I struggled with this would be a massive understatement. I'm not so much done, as mentally done working on it and I can't paint the face and dirt over again for the millionth time. even now I'm itching to fix the dirt! let it go, my friend.

(i, in fact, did not let it go and spent another 30 minutes torturing fiddling with the dirt 🤦)

I left out some of the painting process because it was too long and tedious and I couldn't use more than 20 clips and didn't want to edit it on my laptop just for that reason lol. I enjoyed doing some bits like the fence, trees, the jeans, his arm and watch.

my favorite little thing from this picture is his raybans that he always wore hanging almost invisibly on the chicken wire fence

[lukevonhagen]

my take on marius von hagen: part one, his approach to romance

marius has been with me for over a year now and he pretty much occupies my thoughts 24/7, and this was something i have been itching to write for a while. so... strap in, grab your juice box and your cheetos and let's get this show on the road yeah?

Fair Warning, this will not be under a read more, so i apologize in advance if it gets pretty lengthy. (edit: this post is abt 1.8k words long, wow sorry lol.)

this is going to be a character analysis... sort of; it's an analysis of the version of marius that lives in my brain rent free. given that this is an introductory post to what i believe might be a series of my insane marius ramblings, i think i should provide some insight as to what said marius is like in order for the rest of this post to make sense.

first of all, i embrace realism and i reject canon. in marius' sweet wonders card, he finally reveals the significance of the z dog tag he's always wearing. while i think it's really magical that he was able to move on from blaming himself for his mother's death by having an epiphany staring at the ferris wheel... well, i like to make him worse and i just don't think, ultimately, that it's likely or realistic. the marius in my head has a very hard time trying to justify his own existence. i'm not saying he doesn't want to live, or that he'd put himself in any kind of danger, but i believe that he works very hard in order to justify being alive (to himself). not only does he still grapple with the loss of his mother and the role he believes he had to play in that, but there's a part of him that also blames himself for giann's disappearance.

marius believes that he is a vortex that sucks in everything, that destroys everything in its wake. we know for a fact, above all else, that marius doesn't want other people to have to go down with him.

i also believe (especially due to this description) that marius personally manufactured the image he has as a playboy, as opposed to it being a reputation that was given by others which he eventually leaned into.

allow me to elaborate.

marius, in his desire to avoid people being chewed up in his life and spat back out, would want to control the situation as much as possible. there are a few reasons why i believe he'd make this reputation for himself, which are 1) having control of the narrative of himself and making sure people do underestimate him is precisely how he maintains the upper hand in many scenarios (because let's face it, no one expects ditzy, arrogant marius von hagen to be able to outsmart them), and 2) it's much easier to push people away when he makes himself seem incompetent and undesirable. he may be one of the richest men on the planet, but sometimes money isn't enough to redeem an awful composition.

all of that having been said, marius additionally has to have severe trust issues due to the fact that he has a lot of influence and wealth people undoubtably want to use him for, and said influence is the source of a traumatic experience he went through as a child that would forever change the way he'd interact with others in the future. if you remember, marius vaguely alludes to an incident in will of the trees.

he mentions it again in the card in the darkness when he and rosa get trapped in a dark cave and he begins to panic, only this time he's a little more detailed about what happened to him in order to explain his anxiety to her.

then, he actually gives the details of what happened in his personal story.

mc remembers the hints marius had dropped to her a couple of times regarding this incident, so she then asks:

i don't believe marius actually blamed himself for his mother until this was said about him. his mother is the root of all things; he thinks that if he was never born, she would have never died, and perhaps she and giann would still be around and would be happy and healthy. he convinces himself that his existence destroyed his family. the stress of his feelings and anxiety makes him extremely sick as a kid.

all of this was too much for a young marius; now, remember when i said that i reject canon? that's important, because i don't think he ever properly recovered from this episode. i fully believe that marius does need and should go to therapy as an adult, and hasn't done so. my headcanon as to why he didn't, and why he gives off the impression that he's fine now and everything is fine now, is because he wised up and realized that he was being a burden on others and his mother's death would be in vain if he did so.

marius, tired of being a strain on the people he loves, pretends to be mentally sound to avoid his father and brother worrying about him. the way he chooses to cope with this is to disassociate himself with these events that happened to him, to the point where he talks about them like it wasn't him personally that experienced it. (i might touch upon this again in a future post if it becomes relevant.) he can't let others know that things bother him, because it can be weaponized; it would make him look weak, and the last thing he wants is anyone worrying about him but himself, or anyone to take advantage of that weakness. consider this as a strategy he adopted from the "conceal, don't feel" philosophy.

that having been said, a personal acceptance to "get over it" to stop feeling like he needs an emotional babysitter in his relatives =/= a lack of resentment towards others for how that was handled. marius nearly died due to the cruelty of a jealous relative, and his family was right in trying to protect him (as burdensome as he feels he may is), and he learns pretty quickly that he cannot trust others.

he still is one of the most influential people alive, and that means there's going to be a slew of people walking in and out of the revolving door leading into his life that are going to want to take advantage of that fact. it also goes beyond just people wanting to manipulate him, but he doesn't enjoy playing along in this circus of social hierarchy, and doesn't enjoy the people hanging around in these spaces. because they're ingenuine, they have no merit to him, and quite simply put he's looking to fill his life with color and sincerity.

i propose that... in order to consider a romantic relationship with someone, despite how much he longs for one, he would need to deeply get to know the person first and it would take a significant time to do so... and i know what you're thinking, it's just like a regular relationship, right? getting to know someone before deciding if you want to be with them? except, to marius, this is extreme; this social sphere he occupies has effectively chewed him up and spat him back out, because he's at the top of the top. his father is the wealthiest man in the world. marius by virtue of being a von hagen is essentially on the same level as royalty, and his family name is not enough to protect him. he has to be sharp, and he needs to be alert and constantly on guard.

he'd have no idea what someone's intentions may be with him when he meets them and he knows better than to blindly trust a person's seemingly apparent good faith, but also... he's so worried about dragging people down that he'd be almost afraid to consider it. it isn't enough that people want to use and abuse him to their hearts' content, but they'd try to tear up anyone else who went in there with him, and marius would be afraid of that outcome. he's already ruined the lives of his mother and his brother in his failure to protect them from the circumstances that removed them from his life. he would be unwilling to cause someone else he cares about to be put in the same situation, and he wouldn't be able to bear it if they also ended up abandoning him.

all of that leads me to say: i believe he would be more scared and avoidant upon realizing he was falling in love with someone, rather than immediately trying to pursue it with all he's got like he would his other endeavors.

the reason? it's so simple to pursue art. art is an arbitrary passion of his that doesn't impede on anyone else but himself, nor is it influenced by any outside forces; marius has full control over it. the same goes for his company; no one is going to sit there and hold his hand with his newfound ceo duties. he's always been capable of pursuing things on his own. romance is different; romance involves putting his young and fragile heart on the line to go after a whole other independent and outside entity not knowing whether or not he's going to face rejection.

eventually, i believe he'll completely learn to get over the hurdle, but in the interest of transparency... i think he's going to need a nudge from the other person first. a sign it's reciprocated, before he has to put his heart on ice.

i think it's on brand for marius to be a tease when you meet him; it is a genuine facet of his personality, but it's also something that feeds well into his reputation. he's assuming that people are going to know exactly who he is when he runs into them on the street, so he doesn't even bother dropping his pretense. but, i do think that extends... he doesn't drop that mask right away, it takes months and months, and lots of patience and understanding in order to unravel the mystery that is marius von hagen. he's going to want to gauge whether or not it's something he wants to commit to, and if it is, he's going to have to be prepared to unpack all that baggage. he would have to believe that this is going to be a happy ending for him, that his fairytale won't be a tragedy, in order to see a path forward. once marius goes into something, he doesn't step out.

so, he won't put up that much of a fight if he starts to fall in love with you, but that doesn't mean he would be eager make that leap of faith without getting a hint that there will be a safety net ready to catch him when he falls.

[waarmsalad]

Not really quick note: so ive never actually 'finished' any fics so i wasnt sure how to, this is also the first one ive posted on here, id love to have any tips even from people who dont really write, constructive critisism is always welcome. I think i stuck to the theme but im not sure lol. Ive edited most of it but some parts i only skimmed through after writing them so mistakes are probably present, anyways thanks for reading and i hope that this is enjoyable and not too goofy😭

(I love your work so much @mustainegf, thank you for the opportunity!<3)

Words: 2k

Warnings: my writing, fwb but no smut, mostly fluff, making out and a mention of smoking. I dont really think theres anything else

You noticed as you looked out the vehicle's window, intricate patters of frost decorating the glass. It was the middle of winter, and by the looks of it neither you or cliff would be trying to get anywhere else after you arrived at his place.

The changes in recent weather had been drastic. It had rained the night before, but now even the air was frozen forcing previous puddles to be formed into patches of slippery ice.

You two figured that after hitting up the grocery store, which had been before the heavy snowfall, you would hang out, watch a movie, share a smoke or get into some other suggestive activity.

You were quite content in that moment but the thought that you'd spent nights awake about itched at your mind again.

A while back Cliff had suggested to add a twist to your benevolence. "I was just thinkin' cause you're always complaining that you're not getting laid-" he  pauses to smirk. "And I'd also like to have a little fun now and then." He had previously explained that if uou were up to it, a freinds with benefits situation wouldnt be so bad.

Before you answered he made sure that you knew that he only wanted to if you were up for it, and that you could call it off at any point. "Its completely up to you, just think about it." He told you.

And you did. Of course you wanted it, or rather him, but you knew most of these sort of relationships excluded feelings. Cliff hadnt thrown in the rules yet so you asked him about them, clarifying that you were still only pondering the option.

Cliff said to you that he just wanted to discuss where boundaries lied, as well as any thoughts about the arrangement. He mentioned a few other things like being honest, which was important, but he never said anything regarding avoiding any romanticism. So you agreed.

There was this little sliver of hope deep in your heart hoping that maybe he didnt forbid those kind of feelings because he reciprocated them. However you countered with yourself that he would have just asked you out if he did, since he wasnt one to play with a person's emotions.

You opened your mouth to bring up the topic in the car, but stopped yourself. The different ways you believed he would respond forced you to change your mind.

You noticed after the first few weeks of the arrangement that cliff had been acting a little bit different. A change like that had been expected in some way by you, but he just wasn't the same. And though you knew that you should talk to him about it, the tension was currently a little weighted. You didnt feel like adding to it by asking anything that you deemed momentarily 'unnecessary.'

After a couple of minutes he pulled into the driveway, parking the car on the frozen cement with caution. The heater had previously been blasting hot air into the cab of Cliff's car. That being so, once  you opened the door and stepped into the fresh air, a harsh chill immediately encased your entire body.

Cliff quickly grabbed some of the grocery bags from the back, giving you a head start getting to the front door. Once you were inside, cliff swung the door shut, placing the bags down before beginning to shed his basic winter layers.

While you took off your own jacket, he decided to tease you, he grabbed your sides, icy fingers clawing at your covered flesh. His actions caused you to shriek. He snickered at your reaction, which drew out a scoff from your lips. "Meanie" you commented quietly. Cliff only chuckled and shook his head, smiling.

Once the two of you discarded all of your snow-packed apparel, he informed you that he was gonna grab a shit ton of blankets and haul them into the living room after he put the groceries away. "We can do whatever afterward, I just wanna get you warmed up." He winked, nudging you before dissapearing into the hallway.

You smiled, even without any cozy blankets you could feel a little bit of warmth in your heart already.  Although he was only a freind, he took care of you, which you could do by yourself easily but you needed to feel loved, as your life had been all sorts of messed up.

Suddenly remembering that he was nothing more than that; a freind, you started spiraling again. You knew you needed to finally talk to him about his difference in mood toward you, except you were intimidated by all of the possible outcomes.

As soon as you started to feel a farmiliar burn in your face from holding your tears from the confusion and longing, he staggered into the living room before you. A massive pile of blankets and quilts were stacked high in his arms. He struggled to avoid dropping any, but some dispersed onto the hardwood floor.

Luckily that made you smile before you could cry. You tried to stiffle a giggle, however failing miserably. Once he stubbed his toe on the coffee table next to the couch, you knew that was the breaking point. You bursted out laughing while he hissed in pain.

Cliff pouted, dropping all the fabric onto the loveseat. He turned around and huffed. "You're kind of mean yourself there, sweetheart." He claimed, chuckling. You only beamed at him, posing as innocent.

Feeling quite generous afterwards, you assisted in gathering the blankets and stacking them on the  couch neatly. During your time spent on making the couch look nice, your mind nagged at you once again to ask him, but you ignored your own persistence.

Cliff soon heads to the kitchen to grab the snacks and junk you had picked out for the movie, insisting that you pick what to watch while he left you in the den.

Once you finished, you sat down in front of the coffee table and looked under the tv, finding his vhs tape collection. After you sifted through the different movies for a bit, Cliff brought in a large bowl of popcorn and another small bowl of candy, a couple of drinks inside since his hands were mostly full.

"So what did you pick?" He wondered out loud. You grinned and held up the shining. He groans, placing down the bowls. "How many times have we watched that in this room alone??" He teased you.

"I just really love it, theres Shelley Duvall too" you quipped back, ignoring his faux annoyance. "And to be fair, you almost begged me to pick the movie." Cliff nodded, snickering softly. You slid the tape into the vhs player, sitting back onto the couch as soon as the beginning ads start playing.

You were sitting a little ways away from cliff on the couch. He noticed and pulled you toward him, now sitting sideways. Your legs rested over the arm of the loveseat as you flipped some of the blankets onto yourself.

About half an hour into the movie you could feel a new tension build. It had started modestly, but soon it seemed to be intolerable. You turned your neck a little ways to look at cliff, whose eyes were glued onto the screen. Regardless, you could sense that he wss struggling to pay attention to the film.

You looked back, and were on the verge of speaking up when cliff opened his mouth. "I think we should call it off." He said. He couldnt see the the sudden shock that took over your face because he was still staring straight at the TV. There was no real emotion present in his voice when he told you that, which threw you off.

You knew that he was talking about the arramgement  but you wanted to be clear. Shifting in your spot, you asked him, your tone almost more bewildered than you were. "What do you mean call it off?"

"I mean I cant do this anymore." He claimed, finally looking toward you. He winced at your slight scowl. "Thats not a reason Cliff, you said that we had to be honest." He groaned at your reminder and huffed, putting a hand over his face.

He mumbled something, but you couldnt hear him cause he spoke so quietly. "What?" You asked. This time he spoke louder. "I didnt mean for it to happen!" He stated, which confused you.

"For what to happen?" you were confused, the movie continued to play in the background as you scoffed at him again.

He sighed "Im sorry" he said quietly. "What happened Cliff?" You huffed, getting a little tired of going back and a little concerned. "What did you do?"

"I love you." He says bluntly, he was unable to look you in the eye as he scrunched his face and stood up.

You sat on the couch, no words could explain how many emotions were trying to unscramble themselves in your brain, but the gears started turning so you tried. "Cliff I-" you sputtered. "Why were you apologising before?"

He raised an eyebrow and dropped his hands to his side, your sudden calmness unnerved him. "I thought that it was a basic kind of 'rule' in these kinds of...relationships" He raised an eyebrow.

"Well you never mentioned it." You told him. He thought back to when he suggested it and nodded. "I guess I didnt but I thought that you'd-" he began ro ramble again before you cut him off.

"I love you too, cliff." God, was that a great way to shut him up at first his expression was flat. Eventually he just stood and smiled like a little kid. He did nothing until you rolled your eyes and patted the couch. "Just come here, you dumbass," you chuckled and shook your head. He obliged, pulling you even closer once he sat down.

For a moment you two just looked at eachother admiringly. You had thought Cliff was at an absolute loss of words but he proved you wrong. "Can I kiss you?" He wondered out loud. You smiled and reached your hands to hold both sides of his face, bringing him forward and allowing him to reach your lips in a soft kiss.

You had kissed Cliff before, but this time it felt different. It didnt feel rushed or cloddish. It was sensual, and a little strange. You felt as if every weight had been lifted off of your shoulders. Butterflies started stirring in your stomach, which  made you feel giggly and lovesick.

Slowly, the kisses moved on to small touches, and though it had almost been a routine as well, this too felt different for you and cliff. It felt strange, but amazing both at once.

You broke away and tucked your head into the crook if his neck, littering small kisses and nips on his skin. Cliff groaned and made little sounds every once in a while, he smiled widely, basking in the moment.

Your tounge darted out and you licked over where you had nipped, smoothing over some of the purple marks you had sucked as well.

You kissed back up his jawline to his face, planting a singular kiss on his cheek before pulling away to gaze at him again. His eyes flutter open, his grin staying as it was as he sinks into the back cushions.

He holds you by the small of your back with both hands as you straddle him. Leaning forward, you hug him. "Can we just stay like this?" You asked, feeling no urgency for anything at the moment. Cliff agreed, smiling and kissing your cheek before rubbing your back, the light pressure making you sigh happily.

He held you close. It felt good, to finally be like that with him. The tension was long dissipated and he made it clear that he was only acting strange as to not scare you away with his confession.

The only occurence that disturbed your peaceful atmosphere being a playful popcorn fight, which started because of a small tiff about the movie neither of you remembered by the time it was over.

AGHHHHH idk how anybody writes anything so fast ive been working and procrastinating on working on this for probably four or five days😭

I really hope this was okay, thank youu<3

[josephtrohman]

sorry if you’ve been asked this before, would you be willing to spare some joetrick fic recs? i’m getting super back into them and the bandom so wanted to jump back in with some recs maybe!! (do you still prefer top joe? do you have any toppy patrick? if thats not your bag i don’t mind i’ll honesty take anything you think is well written atp 😁 ty!!!)

i’m sorry it’s taken me a couple days to answer this anon!!! finals got me both tweaking and sleep deprived at the same time somehow. also tho let it be known there is nothing to be sorry for at allllll omg, and there Never is, imagine my inbox as a safe warm place where i’m always here for ANYTHING. anyways, i have answered some joetrick fic recs earlier, here is the link to that post which has my crème de la crème joetrick fics, but i always have more in my back pocket!!! start with that other post’s list tho first for sure!!!! just bc they are THEE BEST. ok gonna put the rest under a break here (including my answers to ur question LOLL) :3

i truthfully have mellowed out when it comes to top/bottom preferences lol (i wonder if ur an og follower and saw my ask from like 2016 that i may have answered more intensely about preferring top joe and oh god the 'bottom patrick network' i was in way back when networks were a thing HDKDJDKDJSJ). i actually really enjoy top patrick/bottom joe in this day and age but there is like. none still. so i dont have much to offer u 💔 but im working on something and so is a fobtwt friend of mine so keep ur eyes peeled!!!

i combed my archive and found u my (very) slim pickings for toppy patrick. which imo is a disgrace and i Have contributed to this pattern of mostly bottom patrick w my fics BUT i hope to change this fact as i have a wip that’s just pwp top patrick/bottom joe maybe coming in the next several months LOLLLL (also my fobtwt friend as i mentioned). but i’ll start with the closest things i can find. i’m gonna break it down with the kind of adjacent to ur request fics First and then give a few more recs after :)

an exploration of the bounds of venus by disloyalorder. this might be the only top patrick pure joetrick smut on ao3 (that i found well-written enough to save at least <3). it’s got a heavy dose of mommy kink/mommy dom stuff so i guess if that’s not ur thing then u really will have to stay tuned for my fic ;) haha

wasted summer by terriblewritings. shoutout to the author for dropping it in my inbox!!! it has the mommy kink too and a liiiiiiittle talk of weight just in an appreciative way idk but a warning; it’s toppy patrick in the sense of dom patrick bc there’s no penetration, but it’s rly good!!! author says there might be more coming too ;3

token by gigantic. this one i found on total accident, i had been digging around on this user’s livejournal because they have two PHENOMENAL wentzman fics up (if u want those recs too lmk) but basically this one is joe on a gay sex mission lol, it is explicit but ofc when u get to the goods (aka the JOETRICK SCENE) it's all fade-to-black instead 💔 but still SOOOOO good so unbelievably well written!!!

i had it listed it in the other rec ask, but bdsm by heyginger has a brief mention of joe riding patrick (not explicit smut tho lol) AND of patrick tying joe up so it feels on the toppy patrick side for sure :)

also for good measure, though patrick is not toppy to JOE in these ones, there are two jeterick fics that feature patrick topping pete while joe does stuff to them etc just maybe to scratch a similar itch? lay your head down -- and feel the beat and two's company, three's just right both by likeasugarcube.

begging all ao3 writers to PLEASEEE write more top patrick/bottom joe joetrick fics i want to read joe get fucked like he deserves <3 ok anyways

EDITING THIS ASK FROM THREE MONTHS IN THE FUTURE TO SAY i have a top patrick joetrick fic up NAOW anon if you happen to return to this ask again anon. addicted to the way i feel when i think of you by josephtrohman aka yours truly ;3 (AND EDITING AGAIN TO SAY I HAVE A TOP PATRICK PUPPY PLAY JOETRICK FIC)

and now here r some general recs that aren’t toppy patrick related :)

my tongue is my choir by coricomille. patrick is mute (mixon is their vocalist) and it’s a wonderfully written, very sweet fic!!!

capture the phrases by rosiedoesfic. patrick has a secret admirer in the form of anonymous post it notes. so good<3

expensive mistakes by rosiedoesfic. cute little fic about the insta posts in mania era that had very joetricky captions :')

the cure to growing older by rosiedoesfic. a au fic where joe and patrick have been friends since they were little kids, a very cute growing up together type story :)

message in a bottle by bunnytrohman. a sweet lil getting together fic sent during 2ourdust. saur beautiful and the world needs more fics set in the stardust era imo!!!

take a breath (i know what's behind that door) by thesecondshow. joe checks in on/takes care of patrick right after the we liked you better fat post. really really beautifully written <3 (hai mitch if u see this)

your secret's out by the_seventh_avenger. cute lil fic, honestly hard to summarize with a lil blurb without giving everything away but love it so much!!

alpha dog by bunnytrohman. puppy play joetrick. i needn’t say more READ THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

leaving it there bc looking at my bookmark list there aren't like a TON more that i even really could rec so i'll save those for if someone else asks in another 10 months <3 lol love u anon my inbox (and dms!!! if u wanna reveal urself but no pressure) is always open to discuss these fics or ANYTHING too 💖

[theemporium]

just found out ur a swiftie, or at least listen to her… do you have like top 5 fav songs of all time by her?? or a fav song from each album if that’s too difficult to narrow down lol

oh god okay okay okay

out of the woods - it will forever be my top song no matter what!! idk even know why but it just always fucking hits for me and i will scream the bridge from the top of my lungs

seven - once again i have very little explanation other than i adore this song and it was one of my favs from folklore for aaaaages and it made me happy to see people appreciate it more

long live - she is iconic and it just makes me spiral. it also does not help that i keep seeing sad devils edits to it all over my fyp because they are shattering my heart

that's the way i loved you - i think its from a writer's brain perspective but the way it's just the perfect wee story? ugh i am obsessed and it feels validating in the sense that all my fav people in love triangles fit this long

false god - it just itches a part of my brain and i could write a million and one different fics and blurbs with the song playing in the background

(also the last two is another huge reason why i am team conrad in tsitp lol)

[manonamora-if]

March Check-In

Lol. We definitely were not back on track here. We tried and SUPER FAILED at going back to the schedule.

Will March be better? Let's find out together...

Onto the usual index:

Recap of last month’s progress

IF Events in the Next Month

Plan for the next month

Still long post under the break. If you want a mini version, head over to itch.io!

February Progress

Welp... there wasn't much of a list in the January Check-in, since it was the retrospective, which included the yearly plan. Still, I did make a mini one on itch. Put together we'd get:

Play more IF and maybe review. ✅

Finish the coding of Harcourt Ch5 ❌ and editing of Ch6 ❌

Fix one of the semi-completed games: ❌

Complete the Vamp/Smoochie jam entry✅

Heyyyy 50/50. Passable grade!

I've passed the very funny number of 420 reviews on the IFDB recently, mainly working my way through the French games (since there are very few reviews and French IF peeps are neat people). There are 300+ games left on that side, it will take me a while to get there but I'm making progress (almost done with 2023!). If my pace continues... I might be able to reach 2nd place in the ranking before my 1 year anniversary of reviewing games (mid-may). Also somewhat related, I've been trying to rate more games on itch too :)

I said I would finish the coding of Harcourt... and then didn't. But MelS was more productive than me, and he finished the first draft of Chapter 6 earlier than planned... which I haven't finished commenting on either... So :/

I also didn't fix any semi-completed games. So there.

But I managed to make it for the Queer Vampire Jam and the Smoochie Jam with Teatime with a Vampire ! A 20k-long trippy game with a hot vampire and a weird show...

AND AND I finally fixed my website and my itch.io profile. It has a cool feature on the front page. And we did a little AMA a few weeks ago!

Honestly, I thought I would have been done with Teatime two weeks before it actually was completed. So that threw a wrench in the rest. And probably having to moderate a few events at once...

And the extra day clearly didn't help.

EDIT: I TOTES FORGOT, but I updated DOL-OS for an extra QOL screen at the start.

What’s happening in March?

There's always something happening in the IF world. I don't think I ever find all that happens anyway... but. Here's the ones I know!

Today is the last day to submit a Spring Thing intent! (ranked)

he Queer Vampire Game Jam ends in about three weeks. Got a vampire/human story with a LGBT+ cast? Then this is the event for you! (unranked) Also they are doing a fundraising/matching donation with submissions!

The SeedComp! (Sprouting) extended the deadline for a few more days! See @seedcomp-if for more info ;) (ranked)

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2024 se termine Lundi! Viendez faire des histoires en français!! <3 (ranked, duh)

The next @neointeractives mini-jam will all be about bringing back old jams... Check out the Revival Jam !

The Text Adventure Literacy Jam 2024 just started! It will be looking for "parser for beginners" entries until May!

Note: @neointeractives will have jams all year long. One a month/or so. And the next Planting Round of @seedcomp-if will start as soon as the results are dropped.

The PLANtm for March

Busy plan once again. Here are the thing I'm hoping to do or finish this month:

Complete my French Comp entry. The deadline is in 3 days. Will I make it? Probably. Will it be good? Probably be not because I've been writing it only in the past two weeks. You can expect some "love" letters though...

Complete my SpringThing entry. It will be all about fixing typos and potential bug. The code will be ready next week anyway. Maybe slap some cool-er animations.

Play more games! Consider this done. There's the Smoochie Jam, the SeedComp! and the FrenchComp right there...

Finish the Code Ch5 of Harcourt and edit Ch6. At least one round of edits would be good. So I can put MelS to work again.

Finish fixing The Roads Not Taken. I'm so sorry babe. I'm not avoiding you I swear. I actually haven't bee on the computer with your files this month...

LET'S DO THIS! WE CAN DO IT!

~

The 2024 To-Do List:

I have done nothing here. So here's the list again for nothing.

The hopefully maybe easy to handle To-Do:

fix the bugs in EDOC + overall the French version to match

fix the bugs of TRNT + find a way to add the missing pieces (giving up on the translation)

fixing the interface of LPM and the popups + check animal interactions

figure out the One-Button JavaScrip/jQuery issue...

edit the loading screens of the completed tiny games to include the program/format logo at least.

The 'Need a Bunch of Content to update but it's planned!' To-Do:

Update my website (bunch new title - also I don't think the logo clicky thing work...) + redo my itch page

Finish TTATEH (MelS dependent - this year should be it - for real)

Finish Exquisite Cadaver (half-way mark by this summer - manif)

Finish P-Rix - Space Trucker (main path at least)

Update CRWL (it's been almost two years... I'm getting ashamed)

The Unlikely But it Would be Dope To-Do

Finish The Dinner as it was planned (and translate)

Finish In the Blink of an Eye as it was planned (and retranslate)

Finish The Rye in the Dark City

Fixing TTTT (at least fixing, maybe try adding some storylets)

And finally The 'It's impossible, but one can wish' TO-DO:

Remaster SPS IH (if I managed to start this after completing the rest... I'm going to eat a whole sheet cake).

Start the IFComp project (2025? Might end up being a ST?)

[bairdcrevan]

Writing Update January 2023

Your prodigal transformers fanfic writer is back at it lol or at least trying to be! I’ve got a lot of plans coming up and I’m using these periodic posts to keep myself accountable and let you know what I’m working on.

First is EarthSpark SoundStar:

Not Starved but Famished on Ao3 (EarthSpark Soundwave/Starscream)

Wrote this before the second half of Season 1, so I think some things will end up being wrong- but it was fun to write and think about. Soundwave and Starscream have a conversation after not seeing each other for some time.

Coming to you soon is Febuwhump: lol get excited, these babies hurt-

The long awaited next installment of:

Pacifcation Link on Ao3 Starscream/Shockwave and Starscream/Thundercracker/Skywarp

Chapter 42 is getting uploaded on Friday 1/27, even if it kills me.

Edit: I DID IT: Chapter 42 up and ready for you

It’s been almost written for more than six months, but a combination of health crap related to BITLET made writing awful. I don’t know how I got my big bang fic done, honestly when every square inch of my body was going through intense, incessant itching.

Had a great conversation with some friends about Paci and the direction I was always heading, but they helped me with some specifics that had been bothering me. I’m trying to overwrite chapters so that I can do weekly updates again- and you all deserve the closure. I have these presents I wrapped a while ago in the fic and it’s time to open them.

This fic is going on three years old (holy shit lmfao). Let’s get this baby to the finish line.

Another fic that needs to hit the finish line:

Link to Exchanging Fire on Ao3 Starscream/Skyfire, Starscream/Jetfire, Starscream/Starscream/Skyfire (and other permutations lol)

Target Fic finish date: February 2023

This one is fun because of IDW Shattered Glass’s comics renewing everyone’s love for SG. I’m excited for the final swell here too and we are close to the finale, so we just have to write what I have planned. This is another one approaching 3 years old, omfg.

And I will SERIOUSLY reconsider ever writing a “meet your doppleganger” fanfic when they share the same name again. It has been HARD lol

And the last one that is majorly on the docket:

Link to Queen on the Throne on Ao3 Starscream/Optimus

Target next chapter: February 2023

This one I am excited to write for you because of what happens next- and it is always on my mind. Recent IRL experiences definitely will color some of the next chapters and give you some LOVELY angst you get to consume lol. This one is quickly crawling up through my ranks of top fics- outpacing a lot of what I had already finished. So again, happy to update it and reach the next steps for you, because the reception has been so nice.

I think that’s enough lol and I will likely break ALL of this- but I like setting high goals for myself lol

[bottlecaprabbitgames]

Weekly Update for 27 March, 2023

Howdy, folks! Welcome to the last update of March! Time really has flown, jesus-

Mind Games: Trepidation

Onto our favorite subject! If you guys haven't seen, there have been multiple edits pushed for mostly Chapter 1 and 2 this week! These edits have added new options to some dialogue choices, some customisation choices, and some variation to certain spots where I saw I favored sarcastic MCs over others. There have been a couple of grammar fixes pushed in Chapter 3, 4, and 5, but I have not done a more thorough editing of those chapters; after putting in some achievements, my brain kinda just. Flat-lined and needed a break, lol!

I have gotten LOADS done on Chapter 6! I am actually in Scene 3/4 for the rough draft, with about half of Scene 3's rough draft completed. Again, the rough draft is just me going through and picking one option for each branch and getting through the story so I know where it'll go when I go back to flesh it out! However, that's still a LOT of progress!!! The whole chapter is at about 5,600 words, and before doing the update I had started editing Scene 1 for a bit to start fleshing out so it's not so much work later.

A few things with MG:T:

In case you aren't aware, MG:T is only expected to be 9 Chapters, NOT including Interludes and the Epilogue. We are over 50% done with the game! VERY EXCITING!!! (Especially as I am ITCHING to get to book 2, lol!)

Chapter 6 is expected to be out in April. I will be releasing it in full as I'm expecting it to be a small to average size chapter.

I am always open to feedback and suggestions! Honestly, I would REALLY LOVE for you folks to tell me where you think improvements could be made or where you'd like to see more choices/what kind of choices you want to see more of. Be the change you want to see, lol!!

Remember: Every time an update is pushed, your saves will be corrupted! I try to push things all at once, but I never know how much I'll get done at any one time so sometimes I push smaller updates over a course of a day. If you aren't seeing anything new, it might be because your save is before the update was pushed!

I am still checking this Google Form! I am considering making one that is all about feedback and suggestions, and I DO check the one that's listed there daily! I actually have an active list of suggestions and stuff people have given me, and I do try to take the stuff you guys tell me needs fixing and put those fixes into the game!! Those of you who have answered the feedback section have been amazingly helpful and I appreciate it so much!!!

In case you missed it, I do have a page up now that has a list of all the free scenarios I've posted in the past and present, at least, the ones I could find! It also has a list of sneak peeks from Patreon I've posted! Some of them are a bit outdated as they're from, like, when I first started writing the game back in 2018-2019, but they're still enjoyable!

There is a poll up on Patreon right now that ends in 2 weeks! It's letting Patrons vote for which RO(s) will 100% be featured in April's scenarios for Patreon, and as a special treat, one of the 2 chosen ROs will be available to the lower tier as well! And, the lower tier can always vote in polls. The tier prices are $3 and $10, with $3 opening up polls, a sneak peek, discord benefits, weekly update+ content, and credits mentions (I will be putting every Patron I've had in the past in the credits of the game(s) they were supporting me during development!), with occasional monthly bonuses. The $10 tier opens up EVERYTHING I have, and everything that gets posted monthly!

I think that's all I got to tell y'all this week! See you at the next update! (Where I can hopefully confirm being done with at least one of the scenes in Chapter 6, hehe.)

[thepocket221]

Can you do Lorelai Blyndeff on a date with her s/o?

GASP THATS CUTE ACTUALLY OMG

edit: it kept deleting parts of fic so i’m getting rid of the cut! LONG POST WOOOO

On a Date with Lorelai Blyndeff!

🐰🫧💖💜

For her, the destination for your date was just a hop, skip, and a jump. However, you lived further away, so you had to resort to taking the bus. It didn’t help that it was fairly loud and really, really gross.. and that it was a bit behind schedule. Not only yours, but the entire bus times were 5 minutes behind! It began to eat at you; the thought that your significant other might think you’re standing her up! You quickly pull your phone out to reassure her that you would in fact be there! Despite your frantic frenzy to text your girlfriend, your attention had been brought to the the slowing down of the very long vehicle. Okay, this had to be your stop…

It was.

Your unfinished text was shut off with your phone and shoved into your pocket as you scurried off the bus, thanking the bus driver as you left.

It was a little ways off from where you wanted, but you know, running is and option.

An option you didn’t hesitate in making!

You bolted down the sidewalk to your girlfriend, Lorelai Blyndeff, who was looking at her phone; her mannerisms were rather worried.

“L-LORI!!” You yelled with the small amount of breath you had left. Okay, maybe running wasn’t the best option; could have thought that one out more, huh..

Her melancholy body language immediately changed as she quickly turned around, “UGH!! What took you so long!” She pouted playfully only to stumble backwards when you quite literally jumped into her arms. She gave you a lovingly-aggressive hug back.

“hEY-” she nearly pushed the little wind left whilst picking you up and spinning the two of you on the ball of her foot, “some of us don’t live conveniently around the corner from cute shops, LORI.” you teased back as she let your feet touch the floor again. Was she always that strong?? The thought itched the back of your mind.

“Plus, the bus was running late. I tried to text you but I got here as soon as I was about to send it.” You mentioned.

“OH” her shocked demeanor became more known, “Not gonna lie, when I saw how long you were typing, I thought you were breaking up with me.”

“NO!!!?!?!” you huffed, remembering how out of breath you were, “I was [GASP] running here.”

“I could not tell lol.” She teased.

Upon recollecting yourself and your ability to breathe, you were able to take in her full outfit. ‘Oh, she actually went through with it.’ you thought in a positive connotation. She was cosplaying a rather familiar-looking bunny. The way she perfectly styled her hair to look like bunny ears was adorable; she was so creative!

“God, you’re so pretty!” You gushed at your lovely gal pal.

The lovely little Lori in question put a hand on her cheek, twirled her hair, and averted her eyes from you to in her blushy state, “Pfft, aww thanks!” With the same hand that was on her cheek, she removed from there only to make a playful shooing motion at you.

“Anywho, before my little sister bursts a blood vessel because I’m not at work (when i have the day off by the way) let’s go in! I’ve been dying to go here with you!!” Her annoyed tone at the mention of her sister was whisked away as she took your hand and brought you into the café.

The amount of days Lorelai “had off” were very concerning.. Especially considering her family’s financial situation. But if she wanted to spend them with you? You could let the malpractice slide for now.

As soon as the two of you had entered the shop, the little treats, drinks, and various merchandise that seemingly littered the many shelves in a rather hurried-decorative manner had her mesmerized. You too of course, but you were more focused on her lovely flabbergasted expression. She absolutely loved everything she was taking in, even if it was extremely overpriced!

What mainly caught your attention though, was an adorable bunny backpack. It was small in size but oh-so-very-soft to the touch! It wasn’t really Lori’s favorite color, but there’s nothing dye can’t fix! But if you wanted to get it for her, it wouldn’t be today. You can’t just buy a present for someone when they’re in the same store as you! How do you hide that?

Aside from that matter, there was quite a more pressing one at hand: who’s paying for what?

“So uh,,” you piped up, “sorry to ask again, but were you paying for the drinks or was I? I mean, I don’t mind! I just wasted to make sure-”

“Chill, sweet thing. You can pay for yourself, don’t worry about me!” She pointed her thumb back at herself in her usual, overly-confident manor, “My dad slipped me some extra cash, so I could even pay for you!” she grinned.

You wanted to question how Martin was allowed to have any sort of “extra money”, but hey, if Lori was happy, you could let it slide for now.

“Not to mention my 20% discount on food and drink!” Her thumbs quickly turned to a finger gun which she pointed at you! And she winked! Ooh, sassy!

You let out a giggle, “Hehe, alrighty.”

——

The drinks you two had ordered were absolutely scrummy! Just cram-jam full of flavor! Not to mention the chips she had bought were to die for! This place was definitely worth the wait.

“This was a lot of fun!” you began, giving a little kiss to your girlfriend, “Even if it were for a short time, I’m glad i got to spend it with you, Lori.”

The sincerity of your words cut through her heart as she looked at you with dumb tears appearing in the corner of her eye, “Aww, really?” Did she not hear that enough??

“Yeah of course!” You hugged her.

The hug lasted a bit longer than you expected. You didn’t mind of course, you loved your girlfriend and wanted her to feel loved too.

When the two of yo let go of each other, a rather suspicious noise came from behind your back.

‘Shit.’ You thought, ‘Maybe she didn’t hear tha-

“Oh? Did you buy something else?” She gave you a skeptical glance, trying to see what was behind you.

“O-OH- No..! Just the,” what could you possibly make up on the fly that she would totally believe, “The fake plant….?” Nailed it.

“Babe.” Her skepticism turned to a harsh-looking dead pan stare, “Babe, now you have to show me. That was so bad.!” She laughed.

Dammit.

“Okay yeah, that’s fair.” You easily gave up. I mean, you were going to give this to her anyways—just not in its current condition— so it’s not like this is really spoiling any big surprise.

When Lorelai had mentioned they would be going back outside due to the crowd forming, you saw your opportunity! You stated you were going to look around a bit more and that you would meet her on the bench with all of the fake, decorative plants on it. She slipped you a kiss and agreed. Once she had left, you rushed to the bunny plush-shaped backpack and almost slammed it on the counter, “How much for this?” You quickly questioned the cashier. They said 45$, you said sure, and now here you are, the surprise spoiled for you significant other. Darn packaging!!

Nonetheless, youu obliged with her request and brought forth the very crinkly bag, “You can go ahead and open it. I was gonna keep it a surprise until Valentine’s Day, but since I kinda ruined it..” You shrugged with a slightly embarrassed giggled while handing Lorelai the bag.

She took it and immediately looked inside. Her gasp made her sound like the was having a heart attack, and it didn’t help that she dropped the bag. Her agape mouth trembled with glee as her hands began to shake, “OMG BABE YOU DIDN’T!!!?!??!” She quickly picked the bag back up to only pull out another bag! But this was not just any bag! It was the cute little bunny backpack!

“I LITERALLY- OMG I-“ HER EXCITEMENT CANNOT BE CONTAINED!! She hastily grabbed you by your shirt’s collar and pulled you in for a quick yet genuine kiss on the lips. It only lasted a second, but holy balls did it feel like an eternity went by when she did, “I LOVE IT!!!!” She squeezed it.

“Really? I thought-”

“WHATEVER YOU THOUGHT IS COOL AND ALL BUT I WILL LOVE AND CHERISH THIS FOREVER OMG I LOVE YOU!!!” Man she really did like bunnies, huh.

You giggled as you managed to find one of her hands and slipped it into your own, “I’m glad, Lori.” You kissed her hand.

Today was a good day.

[clownfucker9000]

3 6 9 11 12 and ACD for Ishtar

Booboo the Fool: 3.-How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?) just as with eating he doesnt really need to sleep to function but he does it anyway, in this case bc being unconscious is a nice break from everything that happens around him. Luckily for him hes able to just close his eyes and will himself to sleep god i wish that were me

6.-Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable? since he was brought into existence hes always been told that everything the cult does is For A Reason and that it has to be done that exact same way because theres no second chances or opportunities so hes internalized that preeettyyy deeply

9.-Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word? oh absolutely, thats a side effect of hanging around Jazz tbh; and yeah he does, he told one of the highest ranking members of the cult to their face to "shut the fuck up" one day they were being way too fucking pedantic. That might have been the one and only time Jazz looked at him with something resembling pride :3c

11.-How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)? again, its in the cult's best interests to keep him as in the dark and as ignorant as possible, so he has learn not to ask questions out loud; hes not stupid though and if its something he really wants clarified and thinks he can get away with he will try to find a way to search for answers. If its something very minor tho he might straight up just ask Jazz when theyre alone

12.-How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach? thats what his bestie Jazz is for :3c 4 me :3c A) Why are you excited about this character? i love tragedy i love suffering i love weird codependence and hes made for that skjhjkhfkjfsdj

C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story? at first yeah, when he was fresh out of being a fan oc, but i thought at least aesthetically he would fit in in Jazz's universe and from there their dynamic and his role in the story were constantly changing until i got to where he is now lol

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look? surprisingly enough he is one of the few ocs i have that havent had much of a change since i created him i mean he looks different every time i draw him but thats skill issue on my part

[sammyluvr]

hey mari! how are you?? i just wanted to say that i love your writing so much, and you’ve somewhat inspired me to continue writing on tumblr but i don’t really know what i’m doing, so if you have any tips that would be AMAZING <33

have an amazing day lovely!!

hey there darling!! i'm well, how are you my sweets!

ahhh i'm so flatter argh thank you so so very much!! i'm so happy and honored to hear that i've inspired you at least a little bit!! i will do my very best to give some general tips!! and then if you have any specific questions about any parts of the writing process (i guess my writing process since we all do it differently) then just shoot me as many asks as you like!

so yeah i kinda just blabbed about my personal writing process, i hope something in here is helpful!

my biggest thing i'd say is to not force yourself! sometimes to get unstuck, you may need to do something to break back into writing, but in general for me, i get too frustrated if i try to force things. you are writing for you, so don't ever feel like you have to do something you don't want to. if you need a break, be it ten minutes or literal years LOL then take your break! it's your craft and you can do whatever you want with it! along with that, write what you want!! if you're inspired by something, go for it! and if you're not, don't stress it <3

for me, sometimes i'm inspired enough to just bang it out right then and there, but most often, i need to do some planning first, because i tend to get stuck. writing out a bullet point list things that happen or are said or even just vibes within the story i want to write really takes away the pressure of getting it "right" for me. i tend to plan in completely informal writing and i also write it in a separate document to separate it from the formal writing of the actual story. i also don't always plan the whole way through because i just have to get the writing out that i've planned so far! then when i get stuck again, i go back to planning or take a break!

go with the flow and let yourself do what feels most natural or helpful. if you're itching to write, skip planning and flesh out details or plot holes that you missed later! or if you really wanna start, but don't know how, start word vomiting your thoughts and ideas onto a page and don't worry about it being coherent lol. that usually helps me get my thoughts in order so i can start writing! ofc, this might not be your process, but you can try out different things until you find what generally works best for you <3

last and maybe more important thing is cliche, but just write!! try and let go of your expectations and let it happen. you can always edit and improve and ask for help and all that! don't compare yourself to other writers, but instead try and find out what you like about their stuff and try to apply it to your own writing! you'll do awesome my love <33

hmmm lets see there's different aspects of actually writing like dialogue, prose, description, plot, etc that i could get into but that would make this post very very long and i'm not exactly sure what you feeling like you don't know what you're doing with, so lmk if you have any specific questions!

thank you!! you have an amazing wonderful day today as well!! <33