#because as long as he exist Tim will never be the baby of the family again?

[arabian-batboy]

I honestly never understood how Damian ended up being the most (arguably) hated Batkid in the fandom when his existence never directly effected any other Batkid in a negative way.

Like Barbara was the reason why Cass & Steph got erased from existence, Dick became dumb/a himbo because they want Tim to appear smart, Robin Jason became a problem child in order to portray Dick as the “Golden Child” and literally not one of them is allowed to out-shine Batman because he’s Batman.

Yet I don’t see stans of these character putting half the energy into hating these other characters (which would be dumb, don’t get me wrong, but at least it will make sense) for what their existence has done to their favorite character compared to the amount of hate they have for Damian, who really has nothing to do with anything bad that happened to any Batkids nor does he get any privilege/good treatment at their expense, aside from like one or two superficial comments about him Bruce’s “real” child even though he canonly has the worst/2nd worst relationship with Bruce after maybe Jason.

[trappednyourheart]

The wrong DNA test

( what if, Sheila wasn't really Jason's mother? The system is already corrupted, then what about the test?).

A huge brawl containing every rogue had started at the time of Halloween, causing the people from downtown to fled there home's as joker had clownized the whole neighborhood with his goon's.

Every bats had taken to groups to take out the three parts of Gotham's as the rogue's had started to make alliances, some had lasted quite long while had conflicts, and causing a big damage to Arkham asylum,

It didn't take long before they captured all of them, none of the bats questions as they observed Jason glowing green eyes starting to flick, they thought it was the pit again, growing wary of the cooperation, but Crime alley was involved and that mean business to Red hood's turf.

Catherine todd love her son as her own even if not biological, Jason knew that. But her thing with drugs couldn't make her stop.

Sometimes after that, they could hear Jason humming a tune,a nice melody from Damian's statement saying that Jason muttered to him “ lullaby” as Jason continued to read his book, maybe it could be from Catherine,

they knew how Jason's past with Catherine todd, his mom even if not related, Catherine loves her son like her own kid but her doing drugs and... overdosing couldn't be stop.

Maybe Jason just remembered his mother maybe reminiscing atleast something familiar...even if it was a bad time.

Jason had constantly have been hearing a woman's? Man's? Voice, singing him a lullaby...it soothing, like as if he known and loved this melody...and that's where the dreams kept coming, there was a person, giving him kisses, Talkin to him stories, singing him lullabies and soothing him, he could dream that he was actually a baby, a baby from a normal couple, well don't count the luxurious baby room.

Jason had took out a conspiracies why he was getting this dreams, ( he swears he's not becoming Tim) and voices, maybe like a misshapen memories from the pits of victims? No it's to peaceful for that, maybe magic? He already contacted Constantine but surely hang up after knowing who it was-

Just how is he getting this dreams? Unless it wasn't.... So he proved again his point, he started a DNA test, again but none had records...of Sheila being his biological mother...that was weird, last time he had a test was from the time as robin..and before his-

So he went to that hospital who had said where Sheila had given birth to him, and most of shock is that no one knows a mother giving birth named Sheila haywood but had a document of a baby, of one Jason jay nightingale, the most believing part was that it's the same day he was born in.

His mother, Daniel F. Nightingale was said to be trans as the doctor who help his mother safely delivered him, And saying that his mother loved him,

one Sheila Haywood had the constant trick to get him and taken him as his own, because his mother's family was a wealthy one they practically sold him to her.

Jason had thought that maybe his mother's family never wanted him to have a son with a man from Gotham's crime alley.

Meanwhile Danny had just been YEETED to the DC universe before the start of Batman's justice thing and had been adopted by a very wealthy fruit loops couple as there kid, so he stayed as the couples daughter even pretending, because he owed ghost writer a favor for the last time, and as DC universe exist so it's story, and one thing for sure the child he had to give birth in this universe has a very complicated fate,

he did the one night stand from his supposed friend Willis Todd? He had to befriend him as Dalia F. nightingale the supposed Wealthy daughter who fell in love with a peasant trope, and gotten pregnant making it a scandal, and reaching to his ‘parents’ circle and getting that drama.

But he never thought he would care for his child, his little jay, his ghost side would purr in delight when they held Jason, he was a very hard sucker especially from his pacifier or his breast, it's so weird being in a women body,

but the way his ‘parents’ sold his son to the women who was supposed to get his son killed and being revived by cheap parody ass of ectoplasm.

He went feral, he had an argument to his ‘parents’ but all fell deaf ears, he couldn't find his son in one of the hotels nearby where that BXtch was.

And that time was where his part of the script was fulfilled, ghost writer already took him, both sides of his, were angry.

He. will. get. his. baby. back.

[chocor0se]

i just thought of a twin tim au so here we go:

On fateful day in July, Jack and Janet Drake gave birth to their only son Timothy Jackson Drake, and their only daughter Tiffany Janet Drake. Also known as Tim and Tiff.

When the couple found out they were having twins, Janet was already well into labor. They were already fine with one baby, as they only needed one heir to Drake Industries and since Tim was born first and a boy he would be great for the role, so they didn’t exactly need Tiffany.

But, as Janet and Jack looked at both of their children, they knew they couldn’t put her up for adoption.

Of course, despite the couple being intelligent enough to run a company while simultaneously going on archeological excavations, they weren’t very wise. So when Jack had one, very strange idea, Janet was swept with it immediately.

Tim would be their son in public, and attend all the galas and be groomed to be their heir, and Tiff would be the daughter no one would know of. She would go to a different school, and not be subjected to the intricacies of high society, and only be the Drake daughter once she went inside the safety of the manor.

The Drake family would stay very close, despite the parents frequent travels outside of the country, and Tim and Tiff Drake would stay like this for a very long time.

Growing older, Tim and Tiff would realize that this way of living probably wasn’t necessary, but neither of them had a big problem with it so they never brought it up.

Tiff and Tim would be thick as thieves, and would become fascinated with Batman and Robin together, learning the vigilante’s identities once they saw Robin do the quadruple somersault, something they once saw Dick Grayson do when they were young.

(They both attended Haly’s Circus with their parents, as the Drake’s knew that they probably wouldn’t be recognized there. Dick doesn’t recognize Tim after because he only remembers the twins as a whole)

But one day, tragedy struck the Drake household when the twins were waiting on their parents to come home from a flight. There was an accident.

Jack and Janet never returned home that day, leaving their children behind.

Timothy Drake was put into the care of a nearby foster parent, Bruce Wayne. But as no one else knew of Tiffany Drake’s existence, she would be left behind. The Drake’s secret never to be shared with the public.

But, Tim Drake wasn’t going to leave behind his sister so easily.

After moving into Wayne Manor, Tim Drake would sneak Tiffany in, and she would live there in secret.

Now, the twins must keep Tiffany hidden from the World’s Greatest Detective and his family, or else she would be sent away (at least that’s what they think) while simultaneously coping with their grief and navigating this new life that they’ve found themselves in.

[sardonic-sprite]

Dad!Tim AU pt 6

Bc Q keeps randomly knocking down my door and screaming EIRA every few months/aff

Part 1

Within a week the family has worked together to craft an official statement for the press

If it weren't for goddamn ras tim would be advocating the "keep all reporters and paps the fuck away from my baby" approach, but as it is he just has to try to minimize damage

They hold a small press conference in Wayne tower, where they've got absolute top security around, and Bruce is right by Tim's side expressing unwavering support and 0 judgment as Tim states that he's stepping down from his position (not CEO he was in charge if like R&D since Bruce came back)... in order to care for his infant daughter

Dead silence. Wide-eyed stares

Tim takes a deep deep breath and says

"Her name is Eira Bahar Wayne. Her mother is my best friend *he's a bit choked up, because he's never going to get them to understand exactly what steph is, more than friend, other than lover, one of the most amazing women in the world* and if you will all take a moment now to turn off any flash or recording lights... they'll come out and say hello."

It was a calculated move, introducing Eira literally in Stephs arms. Tim's the famous one, no one will forget that he's a teen parent, that he claimed this kid. He's also eiras literal biological father, she has 23 chromosomes from him and sooner or later that's going to become apparent

She also has 23 chromosomes from a woman who is not steph.

There can't ve any doubt in the publics mind that steph carried and bore Eira, tho, or ras has an in. So Eira meets the world this way, so that the very first pictures to exist of her are *with her mother*, with Steph smiling so lovingly and holding her totally correct, eiras blanket and stephs dress even subtly matching and complimenting Tim's suit.

That's why he goes to meet them, arm around stephs back, and brushes eiras little Itty bitty curls that Tim thinks are from his mom, and they step forward as a unit

He thinks it works

Camera shutters are GOING OFF (thankfully no flash, he didn't want to go red robin on them) and several reporters are awwing and sighing

They ask a few questions, to Tim and to steph. They share facts - eiras birth height and weight, how long Tim and steph have known each other - but not stories - how long wad the birth, did you decide to have a child or happy accident?

Tim kind of wants to punch the guy who asked that but he forces a laugh and says it's rude to ask a lady such things

And then it's over and the next day 3 different newspapers have it as the headline story

Eira becomes a celebrity overnight. All of Gotham is SCREECHING about how adorable she is, how adorable their family is, how Tim is now a DILF (he blocks that tag) how lucky steph is to have Tim and eira

(There's other screeching too, about teen parents and recklessness and gold digging and debauchery and-- Babs keeps all that off Tim's and stephs feeds, monitoring it herself to ensure it never gets too loud)

Tumblr has an EIRA WAYNE PROTECTION SQUAD blog with over a hundred followers, #eiratheadorable is trending on Twitter, and they've recievied probably fifty handmade baby things in the past 2 months - blankets, hats, mittens, an empty scrapbook to fill, a nursery-appropriate superheroes painting

It's a little overwhelming but it's kind of nice

Tim and steoh make sure to go out and be seen every few weeks, together or apart, with eira on their hip, in a baby sling, in a stroller. For the most part people keep a respectful distance as they beam and coo and wave, and anyone who doesn't is quickly blocked by Cass or Damian, or dick when he's in town

(Jason isn't supposed to be alive and Bruce was found to be way too over protective. Tim AGREES but daaaad stop, you can't give away your batman voice bc one idiot had his flash on)

And exactly 3 months after eiras announcement, the perfect amount of time to cement her as part of the family, cute and tiny and lovable, an ideal in Gotham imagination...

Bruce and Talia announce their marriage and the date for a public, FANCY, vow-renewal, and take the people by STORM

Ta da?

[frogonamelon]

To get my emotions of Chapter 66 of @sodaspons's Atlas out of the way: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAsnlsnfsjnk

What could've been <3 :')

Warning: Long and Spoilers

Ok so first of all: The idea that Vee is accidentally completing the coming of age ritual because the only chain she had to sever was Splinter's is so #*@%$^$ funny. Dramatic irony at its finest. Reconciling with what happened to her, who she is, and who she could be by opening herself up to new experiences and character growth my beloved. I'm not crying you're crying.

The idea that, while Vee is completing the original intention on accident through growing up and severing the pain of her past from her, Splinter not only didn't interpret the intention correctly, severing all ties instead of just the toxic ones, he didn't even do that right as he needs to let go of his grief of what could've been and his personal hatred and rivalry with Saki. Yes, absolutely take him down but it's too raw despite having been 20 years and a potential new family since.

Also! Vee and Tang Shen bksdkbsfbskdbksf

All of it! All of the guardians stuff and Shen naming her and calling her perfect when she hasn't heard it before from what could be her own mom that she never got to have I CAN'T

Her holding baby Karai and talking about her own experiences with the boys knowing that the woman in front of her- who named her- will never get that chance my heart breaks!

She could've left! She could've taken Miwa and Venus and left to New York but didn't because the fate of the world demanded she sacrifice herself without knowing she was being sacrificed. With Venus still in play, she could've stopped the kraang but the boys wouldn't exist. And, while there's a chance she would've done it anyway for their sakes and their existence, the choice was made for her and nfksnksdkfbskfbksdbfkd.

Somewhere out there, there is a universes where Shen got to raise Miwa and Vee and got to be the mother figure April never had and Casey doesn't have and got to be a far better mother for Keno and Tim. One where, when given a choice between two ninjas, she chose neither because fate let her choose.

[selkienight60]

🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️〰️🦸‍♂️

birthday bash by yeeyee123

Kon’s pumped that Clark has brought him in to help put together Jon’s 8th birthday party. No really, he is! Just don’t ask him directly about it, or he may need to go leave the room and take a breather. Inhaling helium gas from all those balloons isn’t good for you, you know?

But still your secrets (I will keep) by JUBE514

“What the hell is that, Batman.” Kal’s still not moving but he does look back now. “Because if I didn’t know any better I would say that was me.” “We have intel from a deserter at LexCorp that Luthor had gotten ahold of some of your DNA.” Bruce doesn’t know how to explain this without it … without it being terrible. “Through a fight, through his own strange methods, through kryptonite, who knows. He tried to clone it, but failed-” Kal’s jaw tightens “Bizzaro.” “This is a combination of your genes and a human donor, with some of J’onn’s DNA to hold it together.” Bruce can trace the Martian's contribution with the barest hint of the way the clone’s eye is shaped. Just an impression, a barest hint that would never be connected if Bruce hadn’t seen the files for himself. Kal bites in a terrible sound that emits from somewhere in his chest, a pitched keen that makes the hair on Bruce’s neck stand straight up. “Where is he?” -- Sure, Kryptonians look human enough, but underneath all that flawless tanned human skin rests a creature that came from the stars.

of worry by adelfie

Kon stares at him. “I’ve been dying, and you’ve been doing”— he peers at the monitor to see the last puzzle— “Sudoku?” Tim shrugs. "I'm kind of amazing at it." -- Trapped with Tim and surrounded by kryptonite, Kon's not looking forward to being told off by Superman for all the things he's done wrong. (Or, Kon and Tim annoy a villain and Clark is a Good Dad)

straight on 'til morning by merils

“All children, except one, grow up.” ― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan Kon hasn't been a kid in a long time - he's not stuck at sixteen anymore, and he hasn't been for years; he's twenty-three and living his best life. But the past has funny ways of coming back to haunt everyone when they least expect it, and there's no predicting the storm on the horizon for him. It starts simply, as do most things. Jon turns sixteen. Jon turns sixteen, and Kon suddenly realizes that if anyone were to treat him the way he was treated at sixteen, he'd tear the world apart. The revelations, unfortunately, don't stop there.

tell me that i'm alright by stiless__halee

Jon already gets everything. He gets Metropolis and Smallville and Ma and Lois and Clark with his dumb goofy smiles. Now he’s getting this special version of Superman just because he was lucky enough to come from Lois, the parent who Clark loved. Jon doesn’t have to spend months striving for perfection just to earn Superman’s tolerance. Jon just exists, and that’s enough for Clark. Well, Kon never asked to exist. He never asked for Luthor to make him, and it isn’t fair that he’s the one who’s being punished for it. or The baby of the family never realizes how good they get it.

you found me when no one else was looking by suzukiblu

The boy lifts the torn collar of his shirt and Clark sees a symbol that is so familiar he doesn’t even recognize it, like he wouldn’t recognize his own face if he saw it—like he doesn’t, for a moment—but Kal-El does not care about the symbol or the face, Kal-El cares about the boy.

[justaboymadeofhoneyandglass]

Hi! Me invading your ask box for once! Uno reverse (I'm also @everyone-with-a-para) but here is my underdeveloped Batfam paracosm rambles

So you have Bruce/Batman first of all obviously. The original masked hero and Gotham protector. Very protective of his secret identity. A lot of the Justice League know each other's real names but he still refuses to reveal his. This is mostly to protect his kids at this point, he doesn't want them to be targeted (any more than they already are) because of him.

For a guy who "works alone" he very much does not work alone. He's trying his best to be a good dad. A few of his kids' hero peronas are linked back to his - Red Robin and Robin are known to be his sidekicks and it's known he endorses Signal, Spoiler and Orphan operating in his city (although Orphan's existence is still debated amongst the public but we'll get to her)

He has a strong moral code including a very strict "no killing" rule

Then we come to Dick Grayson, the first Robin. Dick was a circus acrobat who saw his parents murdered during a show. Bruce was at said show and took Dick in bc he also has trauma from watching his parents get shot. Dick trained and became Robin at the ripe old age of 9 so that he wouldn't commit Actual Murder (against the guy who killed his parents). Don't let the smile and the sunny disposition fool you this boy has anger issues

At 15 he and Bruce have a falling out, mostly his own emotional issues but also some grievances with how Bruce fights, and he leaves to stake his own identity. He founded the Titans and eventually changes his hero persona to Nightwing and operates in Blüdhaven, Gotham's sister city. He makes up with Bruce not too long after becoming Nightwing and he makes a point to come round at least once a week for dinner these days

Nightwing is probably currently the most independent persona from Batman as they now have little connection other than occasional team ups. The Titans know Nightwing used to be Robin (because he was when they were founded) and worked with Batman, but only a couple (Starfire and Beast Boy) know his identity, and this and his scary fighting skills have earned him the nickname of "the younger generation's Batman"

Dick also tries to be the most emotionally stable one of the family because he feels like that's his responsibility as the oldest. Emphasis on tries, he still has that simmering rage underneath. He's very protective of his family and god forbid you cross them in front of him. He nicknames a lot of his siblings too. Jason is Little Wing, Tim is Baby Bird and Damian is Baby Wing, as well as any miscellaneous nicknames he comes up with at any given moment

In canon his day job is a police officer but fuck cops, he's a literal vigilante he would never, so in my paracosm he's a part-time firefighter

(This gonna be multiple parts I'm so sorry you activated my infodumping)

hi! First of all I loveee your blog so so much!

Love batman idk shit about his canon personality but this is cool af

Cuteee nicknamessss yess

(ooh yes of course don't worry, feel free to tell me everything hehe)

[imaginespazzi]

Hey bestie,

How are you? I hope you’re doing good! Me? Not so much after reading part 3 😭

My thoughts:

I wasn’t expecting us to finally get the fight from that night, so I was NOT prepared. This - When Azzi’s 18, Paige says those words, ones that sound a lot like giving up, and teaches Azzi that sometimes in life, even the people you thought would never make you feel this way, are the ones who'll break you the most – this broke me babe, and to think Azzi still held on despite everything. Like I know Paige was just hurting but maybe she does deserve the suffering (a little bit) after all.

The entire summer scene was fucking elite. Poor Katie and Tim, they just wanted a. nice. family. dinner!! And instead they had to sit through their daughter’s gay ass drama lmao, #freeKatieandTim

The bros standing ten toes down for Pazzi ✊ Jon and José not even trying sent me, like no sorry, P is our sister-in-law but we appreciate you dropping by. AND DREW, our MVP - Drew had looked over to Azzi then, his eyes wide and accusing, “you can’t be Azzi’s girlfriend.” – little man was a bit traumatised, like sorry pookie who is this girl and why is she claiming to be something she can’t possibly be? He’s the GOAT fr, I know when he and P got back home, he scolded tf outta her and it went something like- Drew: “Why are you letting Azzi be other people’s girlfriend?? That’s OUR pookie.” P: “I know, I’m trying bro!”. Drew: “Well try harder!!” *stomps away*.

Then the Cayman Islands - UCLA and UConn to each other: 😡😤🔪🤬🖕👿 while Azzi and Paige: 🥰😍🫂🤩💗👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 and then there’s probably Carol like: 😩 (she’s so over all this)

And then the ending! I’m guessing P left without saying goodbye because she probably saw the text from Zoe and once again was promptly reminded of their reality? 🥺

Speaking of Zoe, oh girl I’m so sorry, you deserve better – like damn, she just wanted to share some fucking pizza!!

Also, jealous Azzi making an appearance! (I’m such a shameful sucker for the jealous Paige and Azzi trope, I’m sorry!)

Oh and one final thing on part 3 – babe I know you said writing **** was taking years off your life, but we really appreciate your sacrifice because it was absolute 🔥🔥

What’s next (potentially)?

Oh man where to from here huh… I feel like Paige is eventually gonna get to the point where she's like "choose me, pick me", only to realise that Azzi just can’t do it cause she can't trust her with her heart, and I know it's gonna hurt bad. And even though Paige needs and wants more, she’ll also take whatever she can get even if it’s slowly killing her, because it’s Azzi and she’d rather have a little bit of her than none at all 😔

Also, a tension-filled game between them in the final 4 coming up maybe??

That part where Katie shoots Azzi a look of disappointment – I wonder if momma Fudd will ever call out Azzi over whatever’s happening between her and Paige and poor Zoe?

Either way, something tells me we’ve still got a lot of angst coming our way, and look as much as I want our babies to finally just get their shit together, I just can’t say no to more angst you know, I’m just a girl. 🤷‍♀️

Oh and this part - she’s even less sure about how she’d survived that one year where they’d practically lived in each other’s skins – is this something (I'm guessing this is their covid era?) we go into a bit more?? I do love all the allusions/references to how long they’ve always been something more and the blurring of the lines but never fully crossing it obviously until that fateful summer of 2022. I guess it does explain somewhat, though, why Paige felt so betrayed about Azzi not choosing her (UConn) because baby girl probably thought “ok once we’re both at UConn, we can finally be together 😌” - like her dream/vision of them playing together and also being together got ripped away from her ❤️‍🩹

As always, bestie, thank you for existing, thank you for your talent and for being so generous in sharing it with us. You outdo yourself every. fucking. time. 💐

Quick non-ucla fic side note: ESPN’s Bracketology having Utah and UConn on opposing sides of the bracket, so basically they’re saying Utah vs UConn championship game where I get to watch AP and PB ball out? Yeah ok, give it to me. 🤪 #APHiveUP (but bleed blue always ofc)

Favourite quote/line:

“You always say the right things,” Paige says quietly, and then even quieter, she whispers under her breath, “you make it so hard Az.”

Big love always 💗,

-🙋‍♀️

Hi bestie,

Omg I'm sorry....again 😭

I was gonna wait a little longer with the fight but it felt right to have it in this chapter and I wanted it to be from Azzi's perspective because it would hit just a little harder

Poor Katie and Tim fr like they should have just gone on a cute date instead of having to deal with this craziness

The brothers are the biggest Pazzi shippers like they're actually tired of their sister's bullshit at this point. Drew with the biggest truth ever really just shut everybody else up. "GET OUR POOKIE BACK BEFORE I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING" - Drew Bueckers at some point probably

I was gonna add a line about Carol and Charisma just frowning at their teammates and being all exasperated and then fully forgot lmao but yeah UCLA and UConn are big mad at each other. Though writing Nika and KK are Muhl and Arnold felt so weird.

Bestie you might be the only person who got my hint which apparently was not as obvious as I thought 😭

Zoe, poor girlie pop, y'all are gonna be absolute wrecked for her soon because girlie's just a sweetheart who does not deserve this but got caught in it anyway

Jealous Azzi might actually be worse than jealous Paige in this universe lmao but the waitress was doing *too much*

Part 4 is honestly a bit of a mystery to me because I've dug myself a bit of a hole but never fear, I will angst myself out of it somehow. 😭

#APHiveUp YES EXACTLY BESTIE!! Utah vs UConn for the national championship because actually AP vs AE would be pretty fun too and listen not to get at my girl AP, but AE would win that and then UConn would win and that's the only valid ending.

As always, thank you for being here bestie. I love your long asks and how much you just get me and the UCLA fic which really wouldn't even be a thing without you.

Love you babes <3

[chen-chen-chen-again-chen]

WIP Wednesday

Thank you for the tags, @martsonmars, @artsyunderstudy, @cutestkilla, @bookish-bogwitch, @sailorblossoms, and @hushed-chorus!!!

Once more, I bring shitpost energy to WIP Wednesday! I’ve been having Way Too Much Fun playing with Canva lately, so I mocked up some clothes from my ongoing WIP, Jelly Babies. Behold the shirt that Gregory stole from Simon: 

Hello tags, more clothes, stories about clothes, and a bonus pic of The Artist as a Victorian Baby (XD) under the cut!

And here is Sophie's sweatshirt, a Christmas present from Tyr:

I’m honestly furious that Canva doesn’t give me the option to make this entire sweatshirt tie-dye. COWARDS. The text is based on Lizzo’s Tiny Desk. 

Here is the shirt that Tyr is wearing at dinner:

This is a real shirt, and a shout out to my spouse's friend Tim, who will never read this or my fic. Hi Tim!!!! The first time I met Tim, he went on a long, intense monologue about Desert Bus (which New York Times called The Very Worst Video Game Ever Created) and the very cool charity event Desert Bus for Hope. Tim actually did design some art for DBfH, which is insanely awesome.

He's a very nice dude and the most wonderful DM; he did a one-off Christmas campaign for us a few years ago where he let me be Genji, a fuckboi YT influencer geisha/bard whose winter outfit was a red knitted thong, a cropped jacket, and no shirt (my nips were always tastefully covered).

I will always remember how, on the afternoon of his wedding, Tim said, "I feel like I'm DM'ing right now. I've set the context, gathered the players, and I'm just here to see this unfold."

Sadly, I don’t have a graphic yet of the God’s Gym shirt:

Gregory borrowed some of Simon’s clothes to sleep in, so he’s in old basketball shorts and a very soft, faded t-shirt that says “GOD’S GYM” and has a picture of Jacob wrestling with an angel. It’s extremely gay. 

This is A REAL SHIRT, owned by a professor of one of my high school English teachers. I’ve never seen the shirt with my own human eyes; it exists in the sacred homoerotic theatre of my mind. At some point, I think I need to actually draw it / design it so I can wear it on my bod.

And lastly, as a bonus, here is a (very blurry, low-res picture of a) picture of The Artist as a Victorian Baby that inspired the photo of Baby!Swithin.

“He just,” Gregory chokes, “he somehow looks SO BORED and yet SO SERIOUS?? He’s just a baby and yet his eyes look a HUNDRED YEARS OLD?? Why does this photo look like it was taken in the Victorian era? How is he so adorable?” 

I wish I could share the entire photo, because part of what makes it hilarious is that the rest of my family looks perfectly normal and happy and very 90s. And then. There’s me. The Grim Spectre. But like, a baby.

TRUE STORY: My best friend did lose her tiny mind over this photo, and she did save it as her lock screen. Every once in a while, she’d catch people doing a double take at her phone. She’s white, and I’m sure people assumed she had adopted an Asian baby. Whenever anyone asked, she would just say, nonchalantly, “Oh yeah, that’s my best friend,” and refuse to explain any further.

As always, pressure-free hello tags! @captain-aralias, @excalisbury, @facewithoutheart, @fatalfangirl, @ionlydrinkhotwater, @johnwgrey, @larkral, @moodandmist, @nightimedreamersworld, @raenestee, @thewholelemon,  @whogaveyoupermission, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe  

[ironstrangeao3]

Sand Castles and Garden of Thorns

by Loriavx

Aaron Strange had nothing, then she got everything she never knew she wanted, and then suddenly she had nothing again.

Damian Wayne had everything he had ever wanted. He had just started learning to be better so he's worthy of it when suddenly his everything is gone.

Tony Stark decided to take his ex-boyfriend's daughter and his ex-rival's son under his wings because their respective parents got blipped. Now, he had to take care of two multi-national companies and two thirteen-years-old who hates each other's guts and would one hundred percent turn a verbal fight to a physical one in a heartbeat.

At least they're can quietly exist in each others' presence and are willing to cooperate in the most basic sense 90% of the time.

If nobody opens their mouth, that is.

Words: 9296, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Doctor Strange (Movies)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Damian Wayne, Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark, Stephen Strange, Peter Parker, Bruce Wayne, Selina Kyle, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Cassandra Cain, Stephanie Brown, Pepper Potts, Wong (Marvel), Happy Hogan, Loki (Marvel), Talia al Ghul, Most of them are only mentioned at first because they got blipped

Relationships: Damian Wayne/Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark/Stephen Strange, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Stephen Strange & Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark & Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark & Damian Wayne, Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne

Additional Tags: Protective Tony Stark, Protective Stephen Strange, BAMF Tony Stark, BAMF Stephen Strange, Slow Burn, Supremefamily, Not Civil War Team Captain America Friendly, perhaps, I'm still working on my grudge, I'm still working on my grudge okay, No Beta We Die Like Tony's and Stephen's Relationship in this Fic, At least that means we lived again, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, this is a long ride, Forced Proximity, This Fic Happens During the Blip, Five years baby, Five years of longing for Stephen Strange by Tony Stark, Middle School, High School, Past Child Abuse, past human experimentation, Past Torture, Domestic, Somehow Very Domestic, Sorcerers Dimensional-Reality Problem Bullshits, Cults, More cults, The League of Assassins (DCU), Found Family, M A G I C, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everyone Eventually Lives, Everyone Has Issues, Crossover, Trauma, lots of trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Enemies to Lovers, More like Enemies to 'Who did this.' to 'I trust you.' to 'Don't leave'

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/47946151

[phoenixkaptain]

I posted 425 times in 2022

That's 124 more posts than 2021!

281 posts created (66%)

144 posts reblogged (34%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thelittleredheadedmusician

@satire-please

@diemarysues

@frostedpuffs

@broosepayne

I tagged 390 of my posts in 2022

Only 8% of my posts had no tags

#the inane ramblings of a madman - 122 posts

#star wars - 111 posts

#luke skywalker - 75 posts

#tim drake - 55 posts

#anakin skywalker - 55 posts

#dc - 53 posts

#batman - 49 posts

#robin - 45 posts

#obi wan kenobi - 43 posts

#star wars prequels - 40 posts

Longest Tag: 106 characters

#everyone else: he hid in rafters for ten hours until starfire showed up bc she was the only person he knew

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

A New Hope is a lot funnier when you realize that Darth Vader tells everyone he thinks Obi-Wan is there and everyone is probably thinking “I thought you got over this”

2,036 notes - Posted September 20, 2022

#4

Tim Drake as a character is really funny because on the outside, he gives off this aura of always knowing what to do and what’s coming next and being able to predict his enemies next ten moves, but on the inside he has no idea what’s going on and is riding by the seat of his pants the whole time.

Like, he has the best poker face of any character ever. People look at him and think “Lucky I’m with Robin who knows what he’s doing :)” and Tim’s brain is playing staticky elevator music.

3,130 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

#3

One of my fave things about Wei Ying is that when he fantasized about living with Lan Zhan, he imagined Lan Zhan staying home and mending clothes and cooking and cleaning and just generally waiting for Wei Ying to get back. Because Wei Ying imagined that he would go out and hunt or fish or farm. Wei Ying’s dirty fantasy was that Lan Zhan would live a domestic life with him where he provided food (at least ingredients).

It will never stop being funny that, in the WangXian dynamic, the man who is rumoured to have had sex with so many women as well as had virgins (for their blood? For the sex? For fun? Who knows? Have a virgin!) just hanging around, he fantasized about having a domestic life and farming and fishing. And the “Light Bearing Lord” who came from a respected family and is known as cold and standoffish and feared as much as he’s respected, he fantasized about sex eight times a day with his husband.

It’s hilarious! But, it is also terribly sad!

Wei Ying just wants a home. A place he can go where someone is waiting for him. A place that he can go to and the someone waiting for him is happy that he’s there. A place where he can relax and have fun and his idea of fun is fishing, hunting, and farming. A place where he’s allowed to just be himself, no pretending necessary, he can just exist and have someone exist by his side in harmony.

And then, while I’m thinking about this, I remember that my actual favourite thing from the book is when Wei Ying sits on Little Apple and has Lan Wangji pull the reins because he remembers his mom sitting while his dad pulled the reins. And he thinks about how great it would be if they had a kid so that the kid could sit on Lan Zhan’s shoulders like he sat on his dad’s shoulders. And he recreates this scene, this innocuous scene and it makes him so happy and Lan Zhan doesn’t even question for a milisecond why Wei Ying wants him to do this after he realizes that it makes Wei Ying happy.

They just… am love each other… so much… for so long… and they… they… they are they and that is wonderful…

3,159 notes - Posted March 13, 2022

#2

Din Djarin and Luke Skywalker are both two men who get progressively scarier the more you watch them.

Like, Luke in A New Hope was baby af. He was a child. Even in the Empire Strikes Back, what a little guy. A tiny fellow.

Then boom, Return of the Jedi, and Luke is smiling and like “Tell these Ewoks that you are their God and that if they do not release us, you will be Angered…” He is in all black, he is missing a hand, he has gone off the rails conpletely. He’s like “How will I tell Leia that we’re siblings? …Oh! I know! Riddles!” Luke Skywalker gets struck by Force Lightning like nine times and still gets up and drags his dad’s lifeless body out. There were moments one might look at him and think, “no, ur wrong, he still babie” but you are the wrong one! He goes into Jabba’s Palace and straight up stands there smiling and threatening him the whole time. He’s standing on a plank over the Sarlacc and he’s still like “So this is how you’d like to play :)” Luke straight up snapped, he got spooky by the end of the og trilogy.

Din Djarin, straight off the back, is kind of intimidating. He is a man in full armour who hunts people and freezes them in carbonite and appears behind their shoulders when they least expect it. But, after Grogu shows up, you probably think “this man is weak to this baby, he will become soft” but no! The opposite happens!

I’m talking about episode 6. The Prisoner. I have wanted desperately to talk about this for days, but have only just found the words to do so. Let me explain.

Din Djarin is filmed and edited like a horror movie villain. Like a supernatural force of evil who stalks his prey. Straight up like a slasher villain out of the eighties. There’s hints of this beforehand, what with Din appearing behind a guy in the very first episode, and the fact that he has been shot point blank (many times) but no matter how many times he falls, he always gets back up. Okay, that’s all fine and good.

But episode 6 goes beyond that. He stalks a bunch if assholes through flickering red lights. He splits them up, he takes them out one by one, and the last person standing manages to get out, thinks they’ve escaped, only to die (technically) at Din’s hand anyway. He is straight up a horror movie villain I don’t know how else to explain it, he is a horror movie villain.

Don’t take this the wrong way. Being spooky and intimidating isn’t a bad thing, especially not in Star Wars! Luke Skywalker and his ability to say terrible things while smiling, Din Djarin and his predilection for appearing right behind someone, these ar egood things. I like these things a lot. I love these. I love that Luke is the cutest little scary fella in the galaxy. I love that Din is the most awkward little scary fella in the galaxy. I think it’s great.

Why do I bring this up?

Well, for one, I have been trying to word my view on Din Djarin for days now. I love this man, I have to mock him or I’ll feel incomplete. And I think it’s a disservice to pretend that Luke isn’t a person who most people in the Star Wars universe think about and shiver. Don’t get me wrong, I love sunshine boy Luke, but he isn’t really like that, at least not by this point in the series. He just strikes me as the type of person to say incredibly dark, deranged things with a blank face, then smile at cute kittens. Luke is messed up, and we should talk about it more because it’s very interesting to explore the various ways he’s messed up.

But for another, I am a big fan of Din and Luke being buddies who go absolutely anywhere and scare the shit out of people. A Mandalorian next to a Jedi Knight? Two people who eat Storm Troopers for breakfast?? Can you imagine how much the fragments of the Empire that are still left are quaking??? Those two would go absolutelu anywhere and the anyone on planet who ever sided with the Empire would give themselves up or run, immediately.

Like, Din singlehandedly took out that whole troop on Nevarro. All by himself, he shot out all of the Storm Troopers and everyone inside and I like to think there are whispered stories about him similar to the ones about the Boogeyman.

Now, I know Luke didn’t actually kill the Emperor and Darth Vader, but does anyone in universe know that? Or does everyone think that Luke not only blew up the Death Star, but he also murdered the two head honchos and came out completely unscathed? Luke is definitely a boogeyman.

I don’t know. Something about two terrifying men walking into a bar full of Imperials only to walk out five minutes later of a bar full of dead Imperials just really fills me with joy. Something about the mental image I have of Storm Troopers fearfully sharing increasingly terrifying stories about these two makes me happy. I like bad people being scared shitless, all right? Sue me.

3,422 notes - Posted July 31, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I think Tim is the cryptid of the superhero community. Hear me out:

In Young Justice, it’s explicitly stated multiple times that Tim Drake’s Robin has never been caught on film. There are no pictures or videos. Even earlier on, in World’s Finest Three, Tim gets Superboy to take all of the credit for taking down Metallo and Poison Ivy (something even the reporters find hard to believe) because Tim can’t let anyone know it was Robin.

Furthermore in Young Justice, the ongoing conflict between Robin and his team is that they find it hard to trust him because he can’t reveal his identity to them. But more than that, he can’t reveal his identity to anyone, he isn’t supposed to let anyone know that Robin even exists. There are fake “files” on all of the characters and even the government doesn’t know who the f Robin is, and the file questions whether or not he actually exists.

Then, there’s the part of the comics where Tim is forced to give up Robin, and Steph replaces him for a bit, and literally nobody outside of Gotham knows. He didn’t tell his friends, Bruce didn’t tell anyone, nobody knows that Tim isn’t Robin anymore. And then, he comes back. Just as out of the blue.

In the Red Robin run, it’s canon that nobody knows where Tim is aside from Ra’s al Ghul (who stalked him from the start and so shouldn’t count). Oracle doesn’t know where he is, none of his friends know (two of them are “dead,” so it’d be hard for them to know), everyone who runs into him is like “??? who tf???” Even Dick only has a vague idea. The whole point of Tam’s side plot is that it is nigh impossible to find Tim unless he decides to collapse onto your hotel room’s bed while bleeding out next to an assassin. As one does.

What does this mean?

It means that some superheroes definitely don’t believe that Tim exists, probably the younger ones. Superman or someone is like “Man, I miss the Robin that didn’t threaten me with swords,” and they’re like “Dick?” “No.” “Jason?” “No.” “??? The girl one?” “No.”

Like, some people have definitely never seen/heard of this weird third Robin, and they definitely think it’s something the older heroes are making up to mess with them. On conspiracy boards in Gotham, some people tell tale of the third Robin, the one that came before the Stabby Robin, and other people are like “You’re making this up! This guy doesn’t exist!”

I bet Duke is occasionally like “Hey, I haven’t seen Tim in like three weeks, is he still alive?” And someone else (Dick or Bruce) is just like “What are you talking about? Tim’s been sitting over in that corner.” And Duke just sees Tim unmoving in a corner, and is like “…that doesn’t answer the question, is he still alive?”

Tim is canonically, in the comics, the best at remaining unseen. He’s a cryptid. Kon and Bart tell horror stories about him and have blurry photos (taken blurrily on purpose in the same vein as Big Foot) that they show younger heroes. Jason occasionally regales his goons with stories of a creepy stalker child who fights crime. Dick tells his coworkers about his brothers but they don’t believe Tim exists because everytime they ask for a photo of him, Dick just shrugs and says he’s a bit camera shy. Damian complains about his brothers and all of his classmates are kind of worried he made up Tim, because he’s never come (it’s funny to imagine Jason and Dick and Bruce all coming to pick up Damian from school. It’s funnier to imagine that even Cass has picked him up). Several workers at Wayne Enterprises think that “Tim Drake-Wayne” is just a made up entity to keep the company out of enemy hands.

Tim is a cryptid, thanks for coming to my TED Talk

3,978 notes - Posted April 28, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Sand Castles and Garden of Thorns

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/oUHA2Ty

by Loriavx

Aaron Strange had nothing, then she got everything she never knew she wanted, and then suddenly she had nothing again.

Damian Wayne had everything he had ever wanted. He had just started learning to be better so he's worthy of it when suddenly his everything is gone.

Tony Stark decided to take his ex-boyfriend's daughter and his ex-rival's son under his wings because their respective parents got blipped. Now, he had to take care of two multi-national companies and two thirteen-years-old who hates each other's guts and would one hundred percent turn a verbal fight to a physical one in a heartbeat.

At least they're can quietly exist in each others' presence and are willing to cooperate in the most basic sense 90% of the time.

If nobody opens their mouth, that is.

Words: 9296, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Doctor Strange (Movies)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Categories: F/M, Gen, M/M

Characters: Damian Wayne, Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark, Stephen Strange, Peter Parker, Bruce Wayne, Selina Kyle, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Cassandra Cain, Stephanie Brown, Pepper Potts, Wong (Marvel), Happy Hogan, Loki (Marvel), Talia al Ghul, Most of them are only mentioned at first because they got blipped

Relationships: Damian Wayne/Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark/Stephen Strange, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Stephen Strange & Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark & Original Female Character(s), Tony Stark & Damian Wayne, Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne

Additional Tags: Protective Tony Stark, Protective Stephen Strange, BAMF Tony Stark, BAMF Stephen Strange, Slow Burn, Supremefamily, Not Civil War Team Captain America Friendly, perhaps, I'm still working on my grudge, I'm still working on my grudge okay, No Beta We Die Like Tony's and Stephen's Relationship in this Fic, At least that means we lived again, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, this is a long ride, Forced Proximity, This Fic Happens During the Blip, Five years baby, Five years of longing for Stephen Strange by Tony Stark, Middle School, High School, Past Child Abuse, past human experimentation, Past Torture, Domestic, Somehow Very Domestic, Sorcerers Dimensional-Reality Problem Bullshits, Cults, More cults, The League of Assassins (DCU), Found Family, M A G I C, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everyone Eventually Lives, Everyone Has Issues, Crossover, Trauma, lots of trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Enemies to Lovers, More like Enemies to 'Who did this.' to 'I trust you.' to 'Don't leave'

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/oUHA2Ty

[redrobin-detective]

Jack and Janet Drake

I keep reading Tim Drake centered fics and finding so many varied and interesting takes on the Drakes so I thought I’d put out my own. 

Janet Drake was born into the monied Drake family. They weren’t as old or as wealthy as some of the other Gotham families but the name had power and influence. She was the youngest, far removed from the inner works of the business but still benefitting from it. As a young girl, she was brought up in society, a darling doll then a debutante. Her mother, like so many others, pushed her to try and snatch the reclusive Bruce Wayne but it never really interested her. As a pampered young woman who never had to worry about anything nor had anything really expected of her, she decided to go her own way. The delicate socialite lifestyle wasn’t really for her, she liked history, she liked the dirt. She studied archeology at Gotham University and that’s where she met Jack.

Unlike her privileged upbringing, Jack had it much harder growing up. He wasn’t living in poverty, in the worst parts of Gotham but it still wasn’t great. From a young age he had to work but it rankled him to work hard and have his money taken away for family things. His father was abusive and his mother overworked and he resented them and their miserable lifestyle. He met Janet at university while he was working 2 jobs to pay for school. They hit it off right away, both being passionate for the study of the past and craving the exciting, wandering existence of an active archeologist instead of being bound by desks and books. Everyone around them said it wouldn’t last, that they weren’t suited for the long term. They were right.

Jack was so different from everyone she’d known. Initially said yes to his dates because it would annoy her mother but soon found common ground in complaining about parents and things. She liked that he had some roughness to him, like she was getting a taste of the ‘real world’. It didn’t help that he was attractive and she liked being something of a sugar mama to him, it made her feel good. She didn’t understand him at all when she married him, considering him more like a partner/helper for work than a true husband. Yes he was cute and charming but she never thought of him as an equal. Not really. As they continued on, all the parts of him she’d found ‘charming’ before were now annoying and aggressive. 

Jack genuinely liked Janet but her entitlement, stubbornness and lack of practical understanding about the world angered him. He kept a tight lid on his frustration while they were dating and into their early marriage but as time continued he began resenting the differences between them more and more. He would think later that they would have stayed better as casual friends and was big enough to admit one big reason he got down on one knee is the guaranteed funding source being married to a Drake would have for their, his, expeditions. Kind of shady he would say but he was an angry, broke college kid.  

They married against her parents’ wishes in a small ceremony. Janet was determined to go through and, as a younger daughter who wasn’t in a position to inherit, it was allowed. Jack changed his name to Drake. They finished their degrees and began their expeditions which were also just travel excuses. Jack and Janet wined and dined and travelled on the Drake’s dime and it was good. Jack, who resented Janet’s stuck up attitude, soon become swept up in the glamor of it as well. He tried to leave the old him behind. 

Several years into their marriage, Janet unexpectedly fell pregnant. They had agreed early on that they wouldn’t have kids as they travelled too much. An abortion was planned and never followed though, maybe a kid would be fun, maybe it would save their marriage. Less than a year later, Timothy Jackson Drake was born. Jack and Janet were happy, loved their kid but they didn’t love all that came with being parents. Janet had a hard time bonding, postpartum depression and Tim being an obnoxious, fussy baby made spending time with him unwelcome. Jack was determined to be a better father than his abusive one and thought providing financially would make things better. But though they did love Tim, the allure of travel called so they often left him with Nannies and housekeepers while they jetted off. Janet and thus Tim were Jewish but Janet was overall indifferent, she did occasionally get bursts of interest and celebrate at random with Tim which remain some of his happiest childhood memories with his mom. 

Sometime midway through Tim’s early childhood, Janet’s elder sibling died suddenly leaving them with majority holding in Drake Industries, something neither of them wanted. They only knew how to spend money, not make it and had no idea how to control a business. Jack and Janet’s marriage had already begun showing cracks when Tim was a baby but this really tipped them over the edge. Screaming arguments became the norm as they tried to balance their expeditions and the company. Tim became less and less of a priority as he was getting older and could manage on his own. To be independent was the best thing a child could be. They loved him, doted on him when they were home but they made it clear they had other more important things to do. Tim was never truly neglected, he had food and shelter arranged, someone was always checking on him and his parents DID call and write. It was just very formal and very distant.

Tim had plenty of freedom to indulge in his hobbies behind his parents’ backs when they were either out of the country or trying to sort through DI’s board of directors. He loved his folks, treasured them like rare artifacts he knew of fleetingly and thus coveted. But he also knew not to expect anything from them. He knew things were stressful between them, was very nervous about a potential divorce around the corner but unsure of what to do about it. Robin distracted him from a lot of those fears until they no longer became relevant. It took a while for Tim to cry over his mom’s death and in the end it was because he hadn’t really known her at all and now never would. 

Jack really only properly looked at Tim once coming out his coma and realizing his kid was a teenager and he had no idea who he was. Tried to parent, had no idea how, was emotionally abusive and manipulative to Tim to try and be the son Jack thought he needed. Fell in love with Dana who he freely admits he loved more than he did Janet. Couldn’t open up to Tim, was unable to see Tim as he was instead of who he expected him to be. They struggled to bridge the gap and were only just getting there when Jack was killed. Tim cried right away because he’d had a taste of what a true parent could be only to be taken away without ever knowing more. 

TLDR: Jack and Janet were both flawed, selfish but very human people who probably shouldn’t have married but did for various reasons. They never planned on having kids so Tim was a surprise they had but refused to really alter their life in any way to suit the new addition. The growing cracks in their marriage following Tim’s birth and sudden acquisition of DI lead to a downward spiral that was only cut off by Janet’s death and Jack’s injury. Jack tried later but his selfishness and short sightedness made it hard for him to connect to Tim until it was too late. 

[stxleslyds]

you know how dc keeps forcing this sudden "we're a family" narrative out of nowhere? I'd love batfam content but years of hurt among them make the recent content seem unearned.

bc you know more about dick and jason than the others, how do you think they would realistically become family to each other, or would it even be in character for them to be the "bros" they're written as now?

Oh anon, this question is amazing, I love it! I saw it when I woke up and since then my brain has been brewing this answer, I was thinking about it as I brushed my teeth and as I was making breakfast, and now I am ready to give you the answer, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed thinking/writing about it!

DC keeps forcing the wrong relationships, and they keep forcing the wrong centre of this supposed family, they make it out to be the Bat-Family when in reality the Bat (Bruce) should have never been invited to this party.

This is why I give you the… Dick-Family!

Oh yeah baby, I am going there. Dick is the centre of this “family”, he is the guy who is actually connected with everyone, he has been around for so long and he has been present when almost all of the remaining characters were introduced! Bruce might have come first but that guy has nothing on Dick Grayson.

Dick has cared and loved for everyone in this family in a true and beautiful way, no matter how much fanon and DC try to tell us otherwise. This man was an amazing son to Bruce and Alfred (my love for Alfred and Dick is brought to you by @hood-ex), a fantastic brother to Jason, Tim and Cass as well as a phenomenal father/older brother to Damian.

Dick Grayson is the centre of this whole thing, and thanks to DC now being an Omniverse I will be able to explain my line of thoughts. But first let me clear some ideas up.

The way I see it Jason would only get along good enough with Dick. I am not here for Jason and Tim having brunch together (honestly, Lobdell, what were you thinking), Jason never cared for Tim, and then writers that didn’t know how the Red Hood worked made him try to kill Tim so, to me, that relationship is non-existent, Jason doesn’t really perceive Tim (yet).

Jason and Damian, listen, I know that there is this fanon theory that Jason knew and cared for Damian while he was in the League, but that is just fanon talk and it doesn’t really fit in canon either. Jason wasn’t really capable of doing much other than fight, and after he was put in the Lazarus Pit he either had to leave because Ra’s wanted to kill him or Talia took him to the All-Castle. So, Jason’s only real interactions with Damian would be when Jason was written as a crazy, blood thirsty dude that actually tried to harm a child. So, him and Damian wouldn’t really have a good relationship (yet).

Jason and Cass… that’s just a no. Jason and Barbara, I mean Barbara was older than Dick when she first met Jason, so they wouldn’t have much of a relationship.

Now, lets move on to how I will make the Dick-Family work.

Dick (bless him) actually talks and listens to people, unlike Bruce, so the change would start there. Let’s set the timeline, I will stand right after the events of Under the Red Hood. Bruce just chose saving Joker over letting Jason kill the Joker and the building they were in exploded.

Batman keeps on being himself (trash) and Jason, having survived the explosion, moves on to keep on building his empire. He really wants to control the drug trade in Gotham, so he works on that, he slowly but surely takes his place as a drug lord again and is a constant pain in Black Mask’s ass.

While Jason is doing that, Dick is trying to put together his life after Bludhaven was attacked with Chemo. Let’s say that Bludhaven isn’t completely erased from the map but he does have to leave so the city can be re-built. He goes to Gotham, where the Red Hood works.

Let’s say that Alfred told Dick who was under the Red Hood, so Dick being a good brother goes looking for Jason. Their first interaction out of the mask wouldn’t be nice, Jason barely remembers his life before the pit and he really is convinced that Dick is the absolute worst.

But then Jason being a nosy man would make an appearance, for some reason, let’s say that he hacks into the Batcave and when he does that he finds some footage… The footage in question would be the one which shows Bruce punching Dick and sort of blaming him for Jason’s death. (Oh yeah, I am going there). The footage will make a memory come to mind, Dick taking Jason on a skying trip.

So, the next time that Dick and Jason see each other is because Jason went looking for Dick and here is where these two actually talk. The way I see it, Dick is more flexible with the no killing rule, he has worked many times with people that are villains or that just have different ways of doing things. So, I think that he would understand where Jason’s coming from with his ideas. As they begin to understand one another Jason begins to recover more and more memories from before the Pit.

They get together once a week and they chat about life as well as vigilante stuff. They become friends.

At the same time Dick is also very good friends with Tim and also acts like the amazing big brother he is with him. They chat, they sometimes work together and one day they come across a very complicated situation involving a new drug being introduced in Gotham.

Dick would call Jason and now both of them and Tim are reunited in a safe house working together so this new drug doesn’t fall in the wrong hands. Jason and Tim wouldn’t really like each other. Both of them are there for Dick and because they have to get the job done.

That’s how I see Dick forming the Dick-Family unconsciously. Hell, I will introduce Barbara now. Do you guys remember that in UtRH Barbara was mad with Bruce and didn’t want to work with him but she was still in contact with Dick? Well, I am using that so it can fit my narrative.

Dick, Jason and Tim need more intel so Dick calls Oracle (real Oracle) and because Barbara trusts Dick she works with them.

Here is where it gets interesting, through Barbara, Dick meets Cass, through Tim he meets Stephanie. You see that Dick’s connections are leading him to form a group of people. Cass and Stephanie are trained by Babs and Dick and they become the new Batgirls.

As all of that keeps developing Jason and Dick become “partners in crime” they help each other, they start building a brotherly relationship again. Although Jason refuses to say that out loud.

Then comes in Damian, a difficult child if there has ever been one but he has Bruce so Dick doesn’t have to jump in that fast… right?

Oh brother! Bruce is dead (omg what would we do? Battle for the cowl maybe? No!). with Bruce gone there is only one person who can take his place and everyone knows it has to be Dick.

Dick would feel a lot of things as he is taking Bruce’s place as Batman but he has a group of people ready to back him up (Alfred, Jason, Tim, Babs, Cass, Steph), and he also has to take care of Damian, he is a child and with his father gone then maybe his mother would want to take him back to the League of Assassins, Dick obviously doesn’t want that so he talks to Tim and tells him that he sees him as his equal and that he has a plan to make Damian stay and it involves making Damian his new Robin.

Tim would obviously be sad and a little hurt, but he understands Dick’s decision because they talked about it and Dick actually took the time to explain why he was doing what he was doing (really DC half of the problems you guys come up could be fixed in seconds if people would only take some time to just TALK!).

Dick and Damian work as Batman and Robin and Dick starts assuming the position of his father. They would live with Alfred in the penthouse and maybe Tim will join them from time to time (when he wasn’t busy with Young Justice/Teen Titans stuff). Slowly Dick and Damian will become the Dynamic Duo that we love today.

So, Dick would have his own Robin, Oracle (who is also managing her own team with Black Canary and (why not) the Batgirls), Red Robin and Red Hood working with him if he needs them. They are always a call away. Jason is the most difficult to reach and he will only involve himself in that kind of drama if its about controlling the drug trade or scaring the living shit out of some very shady people.

So, Red Hood wouldn’t be working with the new (and improved) Batman but Jason would hang out with Dick sometimes.

From there they build up. Dick renovates Arkham Asylum and makes it work they way that it is supposed to work. He might also recruit Catwoman when he needs someone really sneaky, they have known each other for so long, I bet Selina loves Dick, she would certainly help him out.

But as all things do, this happy and well-connected Dick-Family is disrupted when Bruce comes back, he inserts himself slowly back into his role as Batman and as he does that Dick starts to move away from it.

But Dick’s connections are strong and well cared for, so, even when he goes back to Bludhaven and starts fresh (again) as Nightwing those connections remain. Oracle still gives him intel, Robin and Red Robin come over to Bludhaven to patrol, maybe they even have their own rooms at Dick’s place.

With Bludhaven functioning again, all of the terrible people that were working there also come back, maybe some of them never left and they have been corrupting the city from its very core. So, when Jason tells Dick that he would like to expand his operations to Bludhaven, Dick says yes, as long as Jason keeps him updated on his work and also lets him know what is going on.

I think it works! What do you guys think so far?

From then on with the whole Dick-Family being connected and strong I think they can actually act and solve their problems as a family. All those arcs that didn’t work very well because Bruce was in the middle of it being a jerk, I think they will work if Dick is at the centre of it. Let’s say that Bruce hid the fact that Joker knows their identities and all that, with such a strong family the second that the Joker tries to manipulate Jason into believing that he created him, Dick will come out of the shadows and shut that bullshit down. If Joker tries to do something to the Circus, then the Birds of Prey and the Robins will be there in seconds helping Dick.

The Court of Owls, those little shits wouldn’t stand a chance against this team, this force of nature! Jason would be the one working from afar because you know my boy wouldn’t be subjected to the “no-killing” rule but if he does it, he has to do it away from the children (Damian) and away from Cass, if he doesn’t want to know real trouble. (He probably arranged those things with Dick a long time ago and he is happy with it).

Now, please forgive me but for angst reasons I will actually let the events of, Batman Incorporated #8, Forever Evil, Nightwing #30 and Spyral run its course.

Let me explain, after Damian’s death Dick holds the Dick-Family together, as well as Bruce because he is amazing like that, but then after Dick supposedly dies, things change just a little bit. Jason would retreat back to his own corner because the only thing attaching him to the Dick-Family was Dick but he would also keep his eyes open and he might also have a direct line with Oracle if things go south.

Aside from Jason, I do see the others working on keeping their connections intact. When Damian eventually returns the land of the living, I can see all of them coming together even more because that’s what Dick would have wanted.

And then Dick will come back from Spyral and here is where the Dick-Family will show the “Bat-Family” why its superior to it in every aspect possible.

The Dick-Family will notice that something must have happened, Dick would never play dead and leave them like that, but Dick loves Bruce and he doesn’t want to tell them the truth, Bruce has no memories now and his family doesn’t deserve that kind of drama BUT Jason and Tim are suspicious, they know Dick at this point and they trust him so they firmly believe that he is hiding something to protect someone. And here is where life repeats itself. Let’s review the Batcave’s footage, yes, I did it again, I just love the fact that Bruce has footage of himself being the absolute worst to his kids, how does DC not use it! Anyway, Tim and Jason find the footage from the events of Nightwing #30 and suddenly the Dick-Family have their “Dick defence squad” jackets on and they are ready to party.

After all that Bruce eventually gets his memories back and he is held accountable for his actions. Also, around this time the events of Robin War would have already happened so Duke is also introduced. Dick lets him join and all that, and then Duke and Cass become besties and they work together.

And yeah, as Rebirth comes closer the Dick-Family would be more united than ever.

The end.

That is how I would have done it. But this way is slow, and DC wouldn’t be able to monetize it as much as they would want.

Jason wouldn’t be giving hugs and calling everyone their brother or sister, he will only get along with Dick and he would be professional with everyone else.

Tim and Damian would get along but they wouldn’t go for ice cream together on a sunny day. Steph and Damian would and so would Cass and Tim or Cass and Duke.

Oracle would work with Dick and the others as a side thing because her main thing would be the Birds of Prey, this time with Helena too.

Alfred would spend his time with Bruce but he would also be very aware of Dick and his influence on everyone around them. Bruce eventually would be integrated to the Dick-Family because Dick is a sweetheart but Dick would also make Bruce follow his rules, Dick is a little bean but he is also the most badass person in the room (whichever room) so you better listen to what he has to say.

The Dick-Family would be something that grows silently and doesn’t need a “Joker War” in order for them to be there for each other, they would try their best each step of the way and they will talk things out when mistakes are made.

This is the way that I see this family dynamic working.

I would even go as far as to say that Talia can be part of the Dick-Family because she is connected to three people, Dick, Damian and Jason.

Dick is the person with most connections in the DC Universe, the Titans, the Justice League, Deathstroke, they all have connections to this treasure of a man. If he needs help in Gotham or Bludhaven then he can call people from the “first circle”, if things are beyond a “street level” threat them he can call the Titans and if shit really hits the fan, Clark and the others are a call away.

Anyway, this was unnecessarily long, I am sorry about it but I am also not because I really don’t know how to answer your question without going on a long rant.

In conclusion the Bat-Family doesn’t work and sadly it wouldn’t work no matter how much they force it. These people don’t have connections, Bruce is not able to make connections between people. And DC has erased entire relationships that Dick used to have. I mean, they got rid of Dick and Tim being close brothers just so they could give us a shitty brunch between Tim and Jason? Only yesterday we saw a true and beautiful interaction between Dick and Damian.

DC is handling the “Bat-Family” in all the worst possible ways. It just doesn’t work.

They should have used Dick all those years ago and they shouldn’t have destroyed Jason’s characterization with Lobdell’s ideas.

So, sadly, my dear anon, I don’t see the Bat-Family as a in character thing for any of these people as they are written currently, but I hope that you enjoyed my version of it. May the Dick-Family bring everyone who reads about it a little joy!

[sardonic-sprite]

Part 4 of Dad!Tim AU!

(Thanks for reminding me Q /gen)

(Tw for... idk general shitty stone-age misogyny?)

Part 1

They've had Eira for a month now, and honestly... Bruce was wondering when this would happen

He's very glad that Jason's at home with Tim tonight, because otherwise God only knows what would have happened, but there'd have been a lot more blood, Bruce is sure

Instead it's just him and Damian at the very edge of the city limits when a woman, bleeding and disheveled and bruised, nearly past recognition, sprints close, slows to a stagger, and collapses on her knees before them, one hand reaching out to fist in each of their cloaks as she gasps for breath

But Bruce could never not know those green eyes. The ones his smallest son shares with his

"MOTHER!"

"Talia! What the hell-"

But he doesn't wonder for long. And again, he really should have known it would happen by now

A group of assassins steps out of the shadows, weapons raised and still wet with Talia's blood. She drags herself up, beside Bruce, in front of Damian, and raises her own sword, but Bruce steps in the middle, finding that ice-cold place of fury that he's struggled for half a year now to keep hidden from his children because of how ugly it is

"Stay out of my city," he snarls. He reminds them of the piss-poor but completely binding treaty, that the league is forbidden to cross the city limits

"Except to redress grievances, Detective."

"You wanna talk about *grievances?*"

But the assassin just smirks. He starts pontificating about children and fathers and PROPERTY like its still the damn stone age. Then he starts pushing the idea of claiming ownership, as pointed as his weapon, and says, "The boy Lord Ra's is willing to grant you. But you are now harboring two stolen possessions of the Demon's Head, and he wants his property back."

Talia spits out a string of Arabic, all words Bruce has heard, but never in so... creative an order. Behind them both, Damian stifles something that might be either a sob or a giggle. Or a choking on air.

This is why Bruce is glad Jason is at home

What Bruce wants to say - shout - is that Talia is a WOMAN and Eira is a BABY and they are HUMAN PEOPLE not CATTLE and HOW DARE RA'S--

What he says, moving his hand behind his back to signal Damian to turn on his comm, maximum reciever volume, is that Ra's is not in fact the nearest male relative of woman or child

Talia's nearest man? Its Bruce. Yeah. Do they wanna see the marriage license? Talia smirks next to him, because they've had that thing ready for this exact situation for YEARS

He feels shitty claiming "ownership" but he knows Ra's is the shitty one and Talia knows what Bruce really means.

Damian makes another very odd noise.

Anyway, Eira? Did Ra's forget that Tim is her fucking FATHER? They've got birth records RIGHT NOW stating that she belongs to HIM, proving her legal existence and citizenship and EVERYTHING.

The assassins hesitate. Bruce knows they're searching. He prays. Talia's hand finds his and squeezes. The marriage record is there, one hundred percent legal, witnessed, valid, only kept secret because thats what had suited them for so long.

The birth certificate... all those other documents...

Its clear the assassin is suspicious, but Bruce thanks God for Barbara’s speed, because the assassin can't tell him the records aren't there. Can't even prove they were dashed together by one woman in the space of five minutes

"As you can see," Bruce says, grin downright feral, "They are both within my protection. Come one step closer to my family and it will be Ra's who violates the treaty

And I *will not hesitate* to call the entire Justice League to war."

The assassin scowls.

But they all melt away, conceding defeat.

When they're gone, Talia sways and nearly collapses again, but Bruce and Damian catch her and call for the car

They go home

Part 5

[loyalshipper]

May I introduce the Tumblr DC community to one of my two favorite Batfam AUs I have created. Bruce Wayne owns a hotel/museum near an ocean cliff and still has a chronic adoption problem but doesn’t fight crime. (If anyone writes this you can make it to where heroes still exist, the Batfam are the inly no capes)

WE still exists but it isn’t run by Bruce it is run by Lucius because back in the 60s Thomas and Martha bought the hotel and wanted that to be their legacy. They still die the same way but Bruce puts all his efforts into running and blossoming the hotel which was his parent’s dream project.

I’ll get back into the hotel in a minute I’m taking about the kids now

Dick is gotten a similar way, he visits the Cape with Haly’s Circus, his parents die because of faulty wiring sold to the circus by Zucco and Dick becomes an orphan. Bruce just so happened to use his one night off in a while to go see the circus. He keeps thinking about Dick and ends up adopting him. He helps Dick and the Circus bring Zucco to justice and sues the hell out of him and shuts down his business. (Adopted at 8))

Jason was found living in one of the shut down rooms of the hotel. Because his dad left and was in prison and his mom od. So Bruce treats him like a wild animal and starts to leave food out on a regular schedule until Jason gets comfortable with him and he adopts Jason. (five years younger than Dick)

Tim was the son of two wealthy archaeologists who were gone 11 out of the 12 months. Bruce met Tim because he liked to come into the museum and take pictures of the museum exhibits and hotel architecture and shoreline which he would develop and give copies to Bruce. So he opens his house to this little boy with a penchant for photography. Until one day Tim’e parents call Tim telling him that they are staying in Egypt permanently because the archeological dig is producing wonderous results and they’ll be hiring him an around the clock sitter. Only for Tim to wait three weeks and no one shows up. They went so far as to fire Ms. Mac but never hired a sitter for their son. So he goes to Bruce in tears and explains everything, because this is it-his parents finally did abandon him, and Bruce sues them for custody of Tim. (Three years younger than Jason, adopted at 7)

Damian was the result of a relationship Bruce had in college while studying hotel management and hospitality. Talia is the daughter of a hotel conglomerate owner who is currently trying to buy Bruce’s hotel so it can be torn down and Ra’s can built a new hyper expensive hotel in its place. Damian was sent to live with Bruce to try and get Bruce to have Damian inherit the hotel so Ra’s can get it and destroy it, but that backfired because instead Damian falls in love with the hotel and his new family (reluctantly) and wants to see the hotel and museum flourish, not tear down this historical piece of architecture to replace it with a soulless hotel only available to the wealthy elite. But something available to everyone that families vacation to because there is so much history and beauty in a thing that has stood for centuries. So Damian turns against Ra’s. Due not that while Damian and Tim do have a sibling rivalry it is not as vicious and cutting as it is in canon. They love each other they just don’t mesh well while in the same room. And yes, Damian still has his variety of pets (7 years younger than Tim)

Cass came to the hotel with her “father,” David Cain, who went to the Cape for business, and just ended up leaving and forgetting Cass at the hotel. He was still abusive and Cass had trouble speaking but he wasn’t “turn Cass into the world’s greatest assassin” abusive. After Bruce finds Cass, he sues Cain for parental custody and then ruins his life unrepentantly. (Couple of months older than Jason)

After Martha and Thomas died, Alfred took over managing the hotel while Bruce was still growing up and while he was getting his degrees, now he is the grandfather to Bruce’s many kids and helps to keep them running and cared for while they run and care for the hotel. He’s also the one that helps the new kids transfer into the life of running a hotel.

Barbara is the daughter of the Police Comissioner still who became friends with Dick and works, first part time at the museum/hotel and then full time. Same with Steph and Tim (1 year older than Dick)

Cullen and Harper work at the museum, Helena works at the hotel. Carrie does both. Duke is the newest acquisition. Only, his parents disappeared and no one has been able to find them yet. So Bruce currently had temporary custody of Duke who lives at the hotel with everyone. (Harper is a year older than Tim, Cullen is a year younger than Tim, Carrie is the same age as Jason, Duke is a few months younger than Tim)

Each person has different jobs. (Dick is concierge/check-in, Jason does guided history tours of the hotel/museum/grounds, Tim works in financials because he deals with the least amount of people, Helena, Carrie and Steph are both maids, Carrie also does janitorial stuff with Cullen, Barbara works hotel check-in with Dick, Barbara and Harper work cashier at the gift shop, Duke doesn’t have a job yet because he is still dealing with the disappearance of his parents, Damian does every job to see where he fits in best.

JARRO IS THE FAMILY PET STARFISH THAT TIM ADOPTED WHEN HE FIRST JOINED THE FAMILY AND RESCUED FROM BEING EATEN OFF THE BEACH

The hotel is still fully staffed with not-batkids, like grounds keepers and other hotel cleaners and janitors.

Location time!

I’m turning Gotham nicer and changing the geography of the city.

The hotel Museum rests about 200 yds from a cliff that overlooks a beach. There is a well maintained stair case put into the cliff for people to walk down, as well as a longer gravel path that follows the cliff edge down to the shoreline. It is frequented by seals, sea lions, and in the distance, dolphins and whales. The hotel it’s self has about 100 or so acres of land and a long drive but it is technically within walking distance to the city. And it’s a normal coastal town with a port and touristic areas. Kinda eerie at night when the fog rolls in but that’s part of the charm of the NorthEast.

Selina is just Bruce’s friend in this. She is Helena’s mother and Bruce was a surrogate for her. She decided she wanted a baby and Bruce offered to be a donor. So Selina had Helena and Bruce is part of her life but not as her dad, which was the agreement. Selina takes care of the stray animals on the grounds and favors the cats.

Clark is a reporter that was tasked to right an article on the hotel and it’s history, became good friends with Bruce and brings his family (Lois, Jon, Bizarro, Kon, Kara, Lena, Chris, Ma, Pa, and Lex) on vacation to it every year. Lex and Clark are divorced husbands that left on good terms and are friendly enough to coparent their son, Connor, who was made the same way as canon but less hush hush and illegally, Kara is Clark’s cousin and Lena is her fiancée, Lois is his wife, Jon and Bizarro are their two biological sons (Bizarro has autism), Chris is their foster son. Bizarro latches onto Jason in a way that he hasn’t before and always loves coming to the hotel, Jon and Chris are best friends with Damian, Connor and Tim are long distance dating.

Collin, Maya, and Maps are Damian’s best friends from school (Damian has a crush on Collin) and he’s trying to convince them to join the hotel staff like his siblings’ friends but they are a) too young and b) not interested.

Roy has all of his problems as in canon and gets help for it, so as a way to try and bring the family closer, Oliver and Dinah arrange a vacation to the hotel for them Roy and Lian. As a stepping stone kind of thing. Get away from daily stress. Roy is resistant at first until he and Jason hit it off and start talking and Jason talks sense into him and they strike up a friendship turned romance.

The Flashfam visit the museum diring a countrywide roadtrip and mad the stop because Bart is a history buff and wouldn’t stop talking about it the entire trip. He becomes fast friends with Tim and is the only person to ever get a Tim Wayne history tour. No matter what Kon tells you he is super salty about it. Wally and Dick were internet friends and used the roadtrip as a way to be able to meet up.

Thad is the obligatory complainer who doesn’t want to stay in a musty old hotel.

Ivy is the main grounds keeper and is in charge of the native wildlife sanctuary most of the land is used for, as well as taking care of the native plantlife and lives in town with her girlfriend, Harley. Harley helps the kids prank Bruce.

Harley is a children’s psychiatrist hired by Bruce to help the kids deal with their various traumas. Her coming to the hotel for sessions is how she and Ivy met.

They started dating between Dick and Jason and Dick talks up each of them to the other, but each individual kid that comes in think they’d be cute together (since they are both professional while working there isn’t immediate proof that they are dating. But they will flirt with each other if they see each other) and it’s basically a right if passage to try and convince their siblings to help them get together and then try and set them up on their own and find out the hard way that they’re already together. They love seeing all the different way the kids try and set them up. They tend to go along with it until either the kids realise or they take pity on them.

Their favorite was Damian’s where he set up an entire romantic dinner at the hotel restaurant and Dick managed to slyly convince him to set it on a certain day that turned out to be Harley and Ivy’s anniversary.

Alfred is the head chef for the hotel, making room service meals and the breakfast buffet line up. Jason will help him out if he isn’t busy with other things.

Victor Fries and his wife hold an ice cream social ever summer at the hotel with all the ice cream flavors they came up with over the last year.

Edward Nygma, famous escape room designer, is hired to make an escape room themed on the hotel and museum that is built on the grounds near the main building.

Another ritual that starts, begins with Tim, where the older siblings convince the newest one that the hotel is haunted and Jason takes them on a “haunted ghost tour” of the abandoned part of the hotel (the part that is too dilapidated and run down to remodel safely) while the others are stationed at different parts of the hotel and grounds to run whatever scenario to scare the new kid. The only one that hasn’t been done to is Cass because even after several years she still jumps a little too hard at loud noises. But one time Jason accident closed a door a little too harshly while Cass and Tim were doing something and it caused her to jump so hard she knocked over Tim and started crying. They were contemplating whether she was strong enough to do it or not and that cemented that she wasn’t.

Tim and Cass are nearly inseparable and are commonly referred to as the Wayne Twins. For Halloween they decided to go as each other.