#because I still don’t like these fucking ppl
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i have cut contact with like 3 ppl atp cause of their political views. no i don’t think im being childish. my mother is latina immigrant who has lived here for 20 years and still doesn’t have her citizenship. my grandparents are undocumented. my sister is a lesbian. my father is a muslim refugee. my family owns a small business. i’m a girl who has been told that i most likely cannot survive childbirth. mine and my families rights are on the line in this election, and if trump gets elected into office again then our lives could forever be changed. so when people tell me that they like trump better because they for some reason think he’s gonna lower fucking gas prices then i have absolutely no issue with cutting them out of my life
#vote for those who can’t#my sister is the first person in my family to be able to vote in a us election#my household is happily blue this year#us politics#kamala harris#harris 2024#vote harris#vote kamala#vote democrat#vote blue#donald trump#fuck trump
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why do ppl only say free palestine and not free israel as well? aren’t both people dying on both sides why is one valued over the other ??(genuine question)
why would a “country” that’s been colonizing a land that does not belong to them would need to be free? from killing and raping innocent people? from using “hamas” as an excuse to blow up children and displaced innocents? from stealing their homes?
it’s 2024, and i don’t mean to sound rude, but look up the older nakbas.
this genocide in particular, has been documented for over a year and people still haven’t taken the time to learn, which is really upsetting.
take a minute to watch the videos and pictures of the victims, i promise you, you will not be asking this again once you see ENTIRE FAMILIES with their heads/bodies blown up.
this did not start last year on october 7th.
that fuck ass “country” has been killing, raping, stealing from palestinians from over 60 decades, and not a single country or worldwide organization ever stopped them because they also benefit from this.
especially the usa. they do not give a shit, they’re simply puppets for that “country”, who not so shockingly is also a save heaven for rapists and pedophiles.
the “i*sraeli” government + military proudly posts pictures wearing innocent people’s clothes, especially women’s underwear. they use snipers to SHOOT CHILDREN.
they shoot anyone who attempts to provide medical support to the wounded.
they blew up EVERY.SINGLE.HOSPITAL in Gaza, they’ve killed more children that ANY war in recent history.
they’ve killed more journalists and medical staff than the first and second word war.
they like to use the hamas as an excuse to blow everything up when the real terrorists are them.
personally, i cannot blame the palestinian resistance for defending itself after decades of cold blood murders. i too would be radicalized if i grew up watching every single one of my family members be killed, imprisoned or raped when their only crime was being born palestinian.
for more in depth information i suggest you check letstalkpalestine on instagram, they’ve been explaining absolutely EVERYTHING about this genocide from day one, including why the usa and other european countries take part in this.
#itneverendshere works✨#freepalastine🇵🇸#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#all eyes on palestine
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Okay.
I had to take a break for a few days. I couldn’t even look at anything related to CM/Aaron Hotchner related bc it wasn’t safe. Which sounds dumb but here we are anyway. I’m sad I missed Halloween, I had a spooky fic for it but maybe I’ll post it anyway sometime.
I am still very wary of fandom space. And I probably pushed away a bit chunk of the fandom with my last post but honestly I don’t rly care. Fandom is not a safe place for anyone who isn’t a skinny white girl. That’s just a fact and no, I don’t just mean the CM fandom, I mean any fandom. The rest of us who don’t fit into that particular category have to fight hard and work hard to make spaces that are safe for us. And even then we still have ppl who will try to tell us what to do, or to make us believe otherwise about the characters we love.
I want to make it clear that I am not bothered that the person on AO3 didn’t want to read my fic. Nor do I care that they didn’t want to read it bc it is for plus size readers. I genuinely don’t care what ppl want to do and not do. Read or don’t read my works, that’s your choice. It’s the way they worded it. Like I somehow deceived them into reading gross yucky plus size reader stuff. Plus the fact that they were either a troll or genuinely fucking blind because on AO3 I have that it’s for plus size ppl in the fucking title AND the tags. Easily visible. But yeah, I was already having a bad time online anyway because fatphobia is getting a lot worse online again. So this was just the straw that broke the camels back.
Their comment is gone now, they deleted it themselves but even if they hadn’t, I just want to say you shouldn’t go after ppl and harass them. This doesn’t help anyone, and certainly won’t help them change their ways. They will double down most often and their distain for the communities they already don’t like will just grow. That’s all I’ll say on that now.
I’ll be back to rbing stuff and maybe writing things today, but again I am very wary of fandom now.
Thanks for reading.
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getting all the education/degrees I can and planning so I can get the fuck out of this country >>>>
#🪷—faerie whispers#because I still don’t like these fucking ppl#done all that yip yapping in my ask box and these ppl still suck#idec who wins#I want out of this hellhole. bc were cooked either way#everybody voting for the wrong reasons anyways so who gives a fuck#I’ve been saving and I plan to get one more degree before I leave#I’ve been heavily considering Japan or Germany#there really isn’t shit here for me#ppl always say ‘wont you have to deal w racism/colorism?’#a cop yelled at me to move my truck out in front of a store even tho I’m on a cane and couldn’t walk far#black men literally have been ignoring and treating me like shit for my entire life since elementary school#trust me when I say nothing could be worse than what I’ve gone through#I’m ready to leave#we have no future under a capitalist society#and a government that no matter what prioritizes war and profit over ppl’s lives#I have no intelligent words for this#I’m truly tired#and for all the dumbasses who were pissed off at me for what I said in august#stay mad bc I have nothing for y’all either#y’all owe Palestinians an apology#they’re the main ones suffering from this ignorance#and we’re next
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#like ffs if i wanted Harry Potter stuff i’d follow a Harry Potter account 😾#even before Rowling went mask off I didn’t consider HP to be sufficiently Halloweeny#but the longer she loudly & proudly reigns as Queen Terf#the less forgiving I am to ppl trying to uncritically shove her IP into more general spaces#if u don’t give her money & just wanna go off into yr separate niche nostalgia corner for fanart & fics u do u#but a lot of us don’t wanna be reminded of that bigot’s existence when we’re just trying to get spooky#and don’t give me the whole ‘but it’s got witches in it so it’s Halloweeny by default’ bs#because if ur bar for Halloween content is ‘there’s witches and/or other magic users in it’ then NEWS FLASH#there’s other fantasy movies & books u could get aesthetic quotes & gif material from#that weren’t made by a still very much alive very actively harmful spokesperson of a hate movement#and the Instagram/TikTok ppl can find different music/sounds to sample#halloween#harry potter critical#fuck jk rowling#fuck jkr#halloween blogs#halloween aesthetic#tw harry potter#tw jkr mention#halloween movies
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Why are ppl scared to call it what it is and say we’re still going thru covid on top of seasonal illness. Like. That’s pretty important right. I was watching the news and they were like oh yeah we have an unprecedented number of flu cases “as well as other sicknesses” without actually saying Covid. No announcement abt vaccinations or masking or anything. Also if I hear someone joking abt “war flashbacks” for mentioning covid I fucking hate u
#source: most of my family members are nurses and it was so bad for one of them they had to be put on a ventilator. in the hospital they#worked at. looking back I think I had a reason to feel a little offput by the shows of support early pandemic#with people tying blue ribbons around trees and lighting signs blue to support healthcare workers#I get that it was supposed to be moral support when we couldn’t do anything but follow health advisories#and it did matter to make them feel uplifted and do something than nothing. im not gonna deny that#but. you can still help now. u know that right. you still have a responsibility here#u can still mask up. u can still get vaxxed and call in sick to avoid infecting others#don’t leave it on healthcare workers to pick up the pieces just because they were doing it before. do u think they had a choice?#nobody likes picking up the slack for someone else and now that we have more tools to do smth couldn’t we just. do it????#im not a virologist but i also feel like continuing to let it get worse by letting more mutations develop#could continue to set us back since this virus is pretty good at fucking us up long term and finding new ways to do that#while there are ppl still researching covid which is STILL A RELATIVELY NEW VIRUS. and studying possible treatment and cures#yapping#vent
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god i wish i was hot and charismatic but instead i’m quiet and off putting
#toast text posts#i know this isn’t a thing i should care about#and there’s literally no way to change it#because being charismatic takes too much energy#but damn#people just like charismatic hot ppl#me i gotta work so hard#anyway blah blah#i wish tumblr was still the site where ppl posted over sharing personal posts#i got two mutuals who keep up the noble tradition#why am i sad#also im a hypocrite cuz i am hot..#but nobody notices!! cuz my vibes r very much ‘don’t fucking look at me’
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I rly don’t see how ppl be 20+ shipping kids anymore tbh… like, it’s so rampant and I don’t see the appeal to it anymore being as tho I’m in my late 20’s.
#I’m grown….. it always baffles me to see it like man I don’t care I don’t find joy in it anymore since I’m not a teenager#I just look at them and think they’re like my fake son… daughter nephew niece whatever lol#give me the struggling and mentally fucked up 20+ year old give me those middle age bitches man if I’m going to like a ship now anyway#like i don’t care about the romance between kids man it sucks that this is such a huge thing in most fandom spaces#not that I participate in said spaces since ppl are annoying and embarrassing#also very nasty#sns is diff tho like that’s a whole other thing 🪽#sns is just a classic it’s legendary it transcends space and time it it-#I’m so glad that jjk is full of adults tho lmfaoo#one of Gege’s only W’s… especially impressive for a shounen#i like jjk outside of the goiji pairings too like I just genuinely enjoy it despite how awful it is now lol#again#I do think that ppl need to learn how to become more comfortable with enjoying media outside of shipping tho#like there’s nothing wrong with it obviously but I’m talking more like how tons of ppl only get into a new series for the sole purpose#of shipping instead of engaging with said media and the story that it’s trying to tell…#this is why fanon and wild insane hc’s usually get out of control too to the point where those who might be interested in checking out#a series might be deterred because they don’t even know what the show is about because the only stuff that ppl see about the thing is ship#stuff and like discourse#and the behavior of the fans…#these ppl be 30+ arguing with teenagers man it’s crazy to me#I just think there needs to be a balance lol#like still go crazy. Have fun and all but you get it#but anyway. with all that being said! Goiji stays winning in my heart 🚶🏾♀️#rambling
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god i cannot wait to be off these steroids…
#marzi speaks#marzivents#<- it’s late n i’m kinda pent up abt this#i’m so TIRED of themmmm#i’m probs gonna be on them for the rest of the year. which SUCKSSS#i don’t like how many ppl comment on the moon face#i don’t mind it. like i look in a mirror and i’m okay.#it’s a little weird. but like. just because it’s different. like getting used to a new haircut#but every time i see someone for the first time in a bit it’s ‘woah your face got rounder’#and i have to go ‘oh yeah it’s water retention- steroids thing it’ll go away when i’m able to go off ‘em’#and they go ‘oh alright :) you still look good btw don’t worry’#and i just. i HATE how people talk about it!! like jfc. it’s so clear that they think it’s like kinda sad#my dad said he thinks it’s cute and he’s the only one i actually think is telling the truth there#my mom and i agree that it doesn’t matter. but even then she tries to tell me not to panic#like a little extra squish in my face is something to panic over#it’s so clear that so many people see it as another thing to pity#oh poor thing. has that chronic illness for the rest of her life. and the steroids made her jaw look rounder :(#like jfc i knew fatphobia was prevalent but come the fuck on. literally i’m like barely retaining water for steroids too#like. i’m still very much skinny (i JUST finished being malnourished ffs) but bc i’m retaining water in my face#now ppl feel the need to comfort me. over this tiny cosmetic thing that does not matter#like. i wouldn’t feel weird abt it if it weren’t for everyone else making it such a THING. why is everyone so weird about it#i’m not insecure about it but when ppl try to comfort me or go ‘it’s not that bad’ it makes me feel like i’m SUPPOSED to be insecure abt it#and it drives me NUTS. bc there are things about being on steroids that i would love to be comforted about#but the water retention is not one of them. i couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the water retention#y’know what i’d like to be comforted over? the mood swings. the irritability. the insomnia. the appetite fluctuation#the slow healing of skin. thinning and dryness in the skin. having to take like 3 other medications alongside the steroid#bc taking the steroid causes side effects that need to be medically treated or prevented#even outside of the steroid! i’d like some comfort about having to build back my stamina from scratch#i’d like some comfort about having the worst balance i’ve had in years#there’s. more to this. but i’m out of tags. maybe i’ll make some replies idk. i’m just. UGH
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The things I want to say about mei mei’s character and the way the fandom reacts to and treats her vs the way they treat male characters who do shitty things… but I know y’all would crucify me
#I’m just saying. there is definitely a double standard#you don’t have to like her. I get it.#but the hate she receives compared to the way ppl react to characters like toji and sukuna and even fucking naoya#is so fucking unfair and ridiculous#it’s giving…. misogyny#we can forgive male characters for literally anything and still like them#but a female character does something undesirable and she’s irredeemable and anyone who still likes her#well it’s obvious it’s because they’re a bad person who condones everything she did#I just 😒😒😒#anyways#kaz rambles
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i feel like a part of my soul has been ripped from my chest and i dont know why.
#is this a bad time to mention i dont even believe in souls?#i really dk why.#no this isnt abt jiro somehow apparently having a loving family#(ok like. at least 1/4 of it is BUT STILL. NOT THE POINT)#(part of me feels awkward abt it bc just. huh? youre telling me. this guy. that i basically am the irl version of. has a loving family???)#(/j and all but just. idk part of me feels awkward now? it just. a guy who blew himself up for most of the same ideals i have)#(gets to have the one thing i yearn so very hard for. everyday of my life. but can never have.)#(ill get over this in like. 2 hours. hopefully. most of thats just shock anyways.)#just. for the past some days. besides a couple things and people. hurt and love havent really. made me feel much of anything#like being cared for by actual ppl even online. yeah. it still does but#even my fantasies don’t entertain me anymore#oh god am i becoming lopt. save me fuck#UNLESS this means i get mason as my bf. then hell fucking yeah (kidding kidding kIDDINGG i dont wanna be lopt. please.)#but srsly. usually i can envoke some sorta reaction from myself if its brutal enough#but. nothing.#id assume that im over doing it usually. but i havent in a good while#maybe this is some what where my art/writers block is coming from#whatever this hell is.#time to go on a spiral of mildly depressing and somewhat cryptic posts (cryptic if i didnt info dump in the tags that is)#why is it so hard to confront issues when you dont even know what the issue is?#i just. wanna be able to make myself feel something.#not in a “i have no one but myself” way for once. just. i dont wanna have to rely on others for my emotions#i want to feel a pang of hurt. yet it feels so empty. i dont want to harm myself. i just want to feel it.#anyways ig.#ig im gonna just sleep#which tbh im growing to hate bc like. i feel all i do is sleep. i sleep to avoid how much my own body hurts. i sleep to ignore my issues#i sleep to ignore the fact i keep forgetting to respond to people even though ik i have to at some point. i sleep to avoid the dread of not#getting anything done. i sleep just because im bored.#and im tired of sleeping.#but. it feels worse awake. my body hurts. my mind hurts. it all just hurts.
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my grandma may not be able to stand up by herself or walk or talk in full sentences but she still managed to bodyshame the nurse and my mom during her appointment !!! the human spirit will always prevail!!!!!
#hahahahaha do you ever think about how every women in ur life hates her body and has a fucked up realtionship with food hahahahaha#like even at 80 years old ur still going to bodyshame ppl because we’ve been taught it since birth and even when u forget everything you#never forget that being fat is the worst thing to ever happen#sooooo funny!!!!!!!!!#(obivously i don’t mean that but like that’s what we’re told!!!!)#no hate to grandma but like god it makes me so sad#you can’t break the cycle!!!!!!!!!!!#mari.txt#food/#fatphobia/
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today is not a good brain day
#I’m not fucking evil for not supporting an animal abuser right. I can still call myself a trans ally and not support an animal abuser right#Right#ppl say “love all trans women no matter what” and I try but I don’t want to unconditionally support someone who would actually try and kill#My pets if she saw them.#It’s not transphobic to hate a girl who sees a picture of an irl animal and describes how she wants to rape it right#Because I feel like I’m being a bad ally
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love realizing i have dysphoria from something i THOUGHT i fixed a year ago that’s so fucking cool
#i’m so fucking frustrated. this was expensive and it only SLIGHTLY solved the problem#listen to your gut if a surgeon isnt 100% what you want go to a different fucking surgeon. ugh#i’m so angry i’ve been wondering for MONTHS why i still had so much dysmorphia tuuurns out it’s. dysphoria!!1 cool!!!!!!!#i’m also angry that i know if i say anything there’s a good chance ppl will be like ‘this is why plastic surgery is bad’#god. it solved some things for sure mt surgeon just didn’t do everything i thought he was going to#i don’t even regret the procedure i just wish i went with a different person#don’t get surgery in SAV if you can help it the healthcare down there is horrible#nick.txt#vent#i know it’s dysphoria because if i see myself from a diff angle we’re totally fine#it’s just. straight on. ugh. UGH!!!!!
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maybe i should talk/show more about my oc now that i’m thinking… idk! everyone is doing something for their ocs/self inserts idfkkkk…
like i just made her for funsies like haha what if i’m eltingville also everyone is eltingville/northwest why not do it…
#nobody will care anyways ANWAYS#she could be based in worse part of me to show and how toxic someone can be with their friends#or also based on how people have treated me back then when i was a teen and met some not so good friends…#yeah… maybe it could be like that but she would be very much a men hater god so toxic so she would never meet those nerd boys#is not like she wants to anyways BUT i think she meets Josh NOT in the comic store#but in some random store that sells everything yknow and they both saw a book/comic they both liked so much and then started to argue#but Vick is kinda the same as Bill and she doesn’t take a no (although she’s not physically violent like Bill but she has a big mouth)#but she’s a loser so she stfu to Josh and get the book. until they made some weird decision bc he never saw a girl like that#or fought with a girl about something he likes more than just getting insulted from his back so like they would exchange numbers/socialmedia#to read the book they want aaand that’s how they became friends because then josh started to chat more with her yknow#bc they both like akira and also robots so bc he is autistic and annoying he can’t stop yapping now that he has a friend#if he thinks that’s a friend bc Vick always blocks him bc he is so fucking annoying. yknow. meeting more toxic ppl in his life poor guy#but yeah that will be the arc of her i guess she’s also pretty lonely but the thing is she got used to it so she likes it#although doesn’t like to deal with idiots and that’s the first guy friend she ever had#her other best friend and only friend (also half toxic relationship but she treats her better) is with fake geek girl#they are from the same school and Vick always give her terrible advices and how men are terrible blah blah blah actual nonsense#also Vick is like the toxic equivalent of Bill in a girl but less violent and not that loser (she is tho)#so she will put fake geek girl into problems when she didn’t do anything and it was all Vick faults! so yeah that’s their friendship#it’s like Jerry and Bill but girls and they don’t punch each other or insult each other. but is still toxic#SO YEAH AHAHHA A LOT OF YAPPING IN HERE ABOUT MY OC MAYBE I SHOULD DRAW HER#i guess idk maybe yes maybe nah too busy
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What do u think about aoyama from bnha? :)
I’ve been out of the bnha circle for awhile, but I always liked him!!! He was one of the characters that seemed like he would’ve been a great friend to Izuku even if circumstances had been different and Izuku had never gone to UA, if that makes sense? Like whether Izuku had a quirk that destroyed his body similar to Aoyama or Izuku was still quirkless, I just see Aoyama as wanting to be his friend tbh. I vaguely remember reading a fic where he and Izuku were friends and I loved that dynamic a lot
I saw some posts about him being revealed as the traitor recently and I wasn’t too surprised to hear it, he was almost pointedly inconspicuous as a character and there wasn’t as much deep-diving into his backstory as the other 1-A students’ when we were first learning about them. I think he’s a neat character especially with that context, and with the reveal I think there’s great potential for some damn good angst and hurt/comfort fics tbh
(Also: as a girlie with chronic stomach issues, I’m always gonna stan a tummy-hurty king 👑✨)
#starlight fandom#starlight anon#thepossumsaretakingover#Aoyama is lowkey proof that even in slash-dominated-fandoms we still have some misogyny and sexism to unpack tbh#because he’s kinda been set up as a really fucking cool character that I think ppl could ship with any of their faves#but at least when I’ve seen him in fics he’s always been delegated to Background Gay Guy Friend#because he’s kinda twinky and flamboyant and fans don’t REALLY like feminine men as much as they claim imho#anyway getting off that soap box - I like him; I think he’s neat; there’s a lot of cool stuff to consider -#with him being the traitor and being blackmailed/threatened into it#and the parallels between him and Izuku and how he never has had a moment of peace#give me some soft hurt-comfort for Aoyama where someone draws him a bath and rubs his shoulders until he cries#I think he deserves it!!!! that’s just a kid!!!!!#also thank you for asking!!!!!!! hope you have a good day!!!!!!
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