#bc whatever they intended people aren’t getting it

[trying-to-get-somewhere-real]

i don’t usually add to these kinds of posts but i also prefer s1 to s2 and am particularly interested in you calling it warmer and more comforting! those are not words that would come to mind for me and now i’m going to be thinking about them a lot. bc s2 is less of “everyone yelling at each other in the kitchen” (fishes aside) i think a lot of people find it a more chill watch (maybe an overstatement but something like that). one of my favorite things about s1 was how loud and chaotic it was and how i felt on the verge of a heart attack any moment (affectionate) - but i know a lot of people who found it to be way Too Much. maybe they still enjoyed the show and its realism, but they did not necessarily enjoy the experience of watching a lot of it in real time. and then iirc there was quite a bit of criticism of the deus ex machina of the s1 finale from both critics and the audience. i loved the ending and didn’t care if people found it too pat. and i think s2 sort of shows how the tomato money was not the magic fix-it that it may have appeared to be in the moment (especially for carm), and it makes the s1 finale even stronger in hindsight imo.

for me, separating the core beef/bear family for so much of the season is what makes it less comforting, even though that’s clearly very intentional and pays dividends in certain ways. i just missed a lot of the character dynamics we saw more of in s1.

but i think i’m more forgiving of s2′s shortcomings than i might have otherwise been bc i have seen so many terrible s2’s of great shows. compared with some recent s2′s of other shows that i thought had near-perfect s1′s, the bear did a much much better job, while taking a lot of risks. splitting everyone up and crafting multiple episodes around individual characters in which they interacted mostly w outsiders we had never met before felt super risky to me. in many ways it was a completely different show. i have criticisms for sure, but any time a show changes this much and is still pretty great, i’m legit shocked. still prefer s1, and do find it more uplifting in a way, but i’m still surprised that the transition was handled as well as it was.

some random thoughts as i make a set:

the way throughout s02 carm and syd each carry what their parents give them–syd literally carries around the coach k biography her dad gifted her, and it allows her to not just navigate how to lead and why, but opens up a new form of communication for her through sports–at kasama her server starts a convo with her about coach k; and carm, of course, has his inheritance–the self loathing and denial and harm, the rage, etc.

fak gives claire carm’s real number and the last text exchange before he bails on her carm and syd were talking about fak

went back to s01 and i do prefer it to s02; it’s so much warmer and more genuine, i think, and is sincere without the try-hard vibes s02 has (though s02 is nicer to look at, and beauty (meaning how it’s approached and treated, not necessarily its existence) does matter in visual storytelling and in any art), and is much better with natalie). i also think just the hopeful ending makes it more of a comfort watch than s02, so i feel more comfortable re-watching it. 

[sootsz]

qsmp has accidentally stumbled into a psychology experiment that would make the stanford prison experiment sob in fear. they’ve gotten a bunch of cc’s, and tens of thousands of viewers, to be deeply emotionally connected to pixel eggs. in doing so they’ve presented a problem:

how the fuck do you get outta this

the eggs were obviously never intended to be permanent (logging on every day to do tasks isn’t feasible to upkeep forever) and they were even given a vague limit of When Mama Dragon Comes Back (and then, of course, the “6 days til they die” thing). now you’ve made it so quackity (and his team) have a big ol dilemma, where two things are true: 1) they can’t keep the eggs forever since it’s not sustainable 2) you can’t take away the eggs without, oopsies, emotionally damaging your friends that you invited to have fun on your server.

turns out, when you give a group of humans all their own fully-realized individual who presents as a (weak, vulnerable) child that is in need of care from them, whatever instinct has kept us alive for generations goes “!!!!!” which is both really cool and compassionate, but also kinda concerning!

because, well: not sustainable! and if the eggs aren’t sustainable, what’s the alternative? killing them?? no! just look at jaiden’s reaction to bobby “losing” a life, even when it wasn’t his last one. or bad’s genuinely heart wrenching reaction to dapper losing a life. or how quiet and angry phil got after chayanne and tallulah had a “nightmare,” before it was resolved. that’s not acting. that’s real. what the hell will they do if the eggs actually die? from what i see, the cc’s are taking the “6 days til death” thing as something that’s avoidable. a threat that can be overcome. and for their sake, i hope it is.

ever played a dnd game where you actually feel insulted bc of smth someone’s pc did? yeah. that x20 because there’s SO much overlap between “streamer persona” and “literally just who they are”. and this level of roleplay character bleeding is cool, but i hope the eggs are handled carefully, or all those involved might end up actually hurt.

there’s also the whole added element of fans, many of whom only tune into the streams for egg content. the plot is very egg-centric. the roleplaying and characterization that the cc’s are doing is all centered around the eggs in one way or another. it’s been going on for a month, but it does not feel at all resolved, and plot-wise it would completely mess up so many plot threads happening if the eggs were all to go (charlie’s unresolved deal with lil j, quackity’s goal to bond with tallulah, the trial, etc etc) so if you take away the eggs, you risk messing up the whole vibe they’ve got going on, and facing backlash from fans who are also emotionally compromised by pixel eggs

we inherently want to protect the cute and vulnerable, and by god are these eggs cute and so very fragile. (then, there’s another layer of people’s own issues that they project onto the eggs. be it desire for paternity, some kind of maternal instinct, or, even in the matter of chayanne, using chayanne as a sort of way to cope with loss by making connections between chayanne and technoblade. which is beautiful and very sweet but would give chayanne dying some additional emotionally charged elements which i think should be avoided at all costs). there’s a reason that movies and other media generally do not kill named children characters—audiences really hate it. it’s taboo for good reason.

which leads us to

schrodinger’s egg: until sunday, they r both alive and dead. and this is both good and bad. god help us all

[strawberrystepmom]

some good advice I heard a while back and have been trying to implement in my life since is that it is helpful to actively decenter yourself from other people’s lives. this doesnt mean like withdrawing or avoiding anyone, it means understanding that everyone else has their own world. everyone exists in their own tiny microcosm and oftentimes the terrible ways we assume other people feel about us or the things we are doing are simply not true because (I know this sounds mean) they just don’t really care.

and I don’t mean they don’t care in a cruel way I mean it in a “everyone literally has their own difficulties and struggles and fears every single day they are not obsessing over anything you’re doing the way you may be worried that they are”

as someone who has suffered from intense and at times debilitating anxiety my whole life, this was like clearing clouds in my mind. for the first time I could see that I was making myself the center of other people’s worlds and assuming their feelings instead of taking them at their word or trusting our relationship as friends or coworkers or whatever. it isn’t intended to be unkind when you assume that of other people but it can make you untrustworthy and withdrawn and lonely.

believe that people say wonderful things about you when you aren’t around. trust people who say they’re your friends. for my fellow anxious disposition havers - you are loved. your absence is felt in every room you walk out of. get out of your head and accept your place in people’s hearts bc it’s there and waiting for you.

[knyontop]

You should totally write like..a zombie reader...x toga... for me because your writing is so awesome sauce😈🔥

₊˚ ‿︵‿୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿ ˚₊

OMG ANYTHING FOR YOU!! Btw I decided to make this yandere just bc i felt like it;3

Tw: possessive behavior, yandere stuff, force feeding, knifes, Toga cutting reader, talks of murder snd stuff.

Ft: Toga Himiko, Dabi, Shigaraki Tomura, Bakugou Katsuki, and our amazing, handsome, beautiful, reader.

Toga:

・When she first saw you she was in such awe.

・LIKE YOUR SO CUTE OMG YOUR THE FIRST ZOMBIE SHES EVER SEEN!!?

・when she first lays eyes on you she KNOWS that she needed to have you.

・she couldn’t wait to see you all covered in blood! Your cute but you would be cuter with a few cuts and scraps~

・Toga makes sure to get some of your blood, Tomura would be happy to have a zombies blood!

・unfortunately, they aren’t here for you there here for Bakugou but before she left she blew you a little kiss before leaving. You were confused to say the least.. (but also flattered)

・ever sense the training camp you’ve been getting weird love notes by your “secret admirer, Toga” she put her name?? I thought it was supposed to be secret??? Whatever😭

・Toga is genuinely soooooooo so so so in love with you.

・your face, your eyes, your body, the way her knife cuts perfectly into your sensitive green skin. She just cant get enough of you she just wants to gobble you up!! (Pun intended)

・the league is getting tired of all her rants about how much she loves you🙁 (hang in there dabi)

・she wants you, no she needs you to be with her forever! And she will have you all to herself. Soon.

・she has to beg Shigaraki to let her kidnap you, he thinks its way to risky! Which is it but hey, you only live once so come help her break into a high school full of kids and heros and kidnap one of the students there! It should be easy enough right? Yeah, yeah they will be fineeeeee..

・you woke up🙁

・Dabi put a heated hand over your mouth, it wasn’t hot enough to burn you just to warn ya that hes willing to kill you right here right now. (BITE HIS FINGERS OFFSIBSUHIBDIYUG)

・him and Toga were able to get you knocked out so it would be easier to bring you back to base~ she was giggling and blushing the wholeeeeeeee wayyyyyyyyyy

・once you wake up, your tied to a chair in a rusty abbandened building with Toga in your lap cooing at you and caressing your face.

・Toga has her knife right at your throat and everything in her wants to push it through and watch your blood drip down your gorgeous body.. but, you would die and Toga would never forgive herself for that soooooooooo just little cuts! (For now)

・sense your a zombie she thinks that you can only eat and drink peoples blood so she tries to make you drink hers, you two would be apart of each other! Isn’t that so romantic!? (She will force you to drink her blood)

・she rants to you about everything, food, missions, life problems, just everything. She acts like she didn’t kidnap you!

・she forces you to say I love you back. (You almost died from blood loss the last time you refused.)

・”Awh your such a cute little zombie!! I just want to cut you alllllllll up!”

・Toga is not the best yandere to be with so i wish you guys good luck, your going to need it.

₊˚ ‿︵‿୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿ ˚₊

This was fun :3

[angy-grrr]

The good old conflict continues over Twitter. According to dudebros, apparently, we are the problem for Hori not making IzuOcha canon. But at the same time, IzuOcha is already canon in an 'implied' sense in the narrative, and that we are delusional for ''denying their canon romance''.

Some people are even trying to argue that Bakugo and Izuku don't have that much of a special bond or relationship. I mean... really? So we just gonna ignore the literal core part of the story, then?

They constantly like to bring the moments like the recent roof scene and how 'Ochako saved Deku when Deku lost control of the black whip'. Let's just ignore that Izuku lost control because someone insulted Bakugo and that Ochako couldn't stop Izuku, she had to get him be 'brainwashed'.

If the roof scene was The Moment, then they would have gone canon right and there, yet they didn't. Oh.... But, yeah, sorry. It's actually our fault that Hori didn't make the straight ship canon in his shounen manga.

When will they stop acting like the straights are oppressed?

BNHA 430 SPOILERS

it’s quite common for manga shonen series to canonize their het ships by showing something romantic without letting us know how they confessed, at least in the original work; they are often already married in a time skip, or they are shown together in the future while at least one of them (usually the woman) blushing, and this is bc of Japanese typical narration - its not driven by the need of a closed conclusion, usually it’s even better the more often it gets.

I recommend checking on kishotenketsu for more on this!

but anyways, the thing with ochako and Izuku is they don’t have any implied romantic moment which lets the intended audience to understand they are in a relationship -the only scene they have together alone in the time skip is with a small panel, which could be valid, but the snow doesn’t imply it’s Christmas (a romantic holiday) as they are wearing their uniforms and probably are still on campus and neither is even blushing or shown being typical teenagers in love, even tho is clear Izuku is still quite like “a boy at heart”, wanting to be called cool by his teacher at 25 (I don’t believe in the perspective many have of him getting all confident about romance and having a flirty attitude towards Ochako or anyone; there’s nothing implying he became that way). Even Ochako doesn’t have her usual blush!

Bc Mr. Compress is under it reading Spinner’s book, along with the melancholy of the winter with the harsher conditions but beautiful landscapes, it creates a bittersweet image in Japanese culture, as far as I know in my research. It’s not “the villains died but hey, the heteros are dating!”, but more about “Tenko and Himiko died, and there’s this memory about them that will always live. Wonder and snow is a time for reflection, with the possibility of a bright future, so Ochako and Izuku, while failing, still have hope to save complete strangers and inspire others to do the same”.

I think is more about them and the villains, everyone becoming heroes on their own by helping others no matter their “oficial status”. the funniest part? It could be more romantic and imply they are together quite easy if only Horikoshi decided to actually make them a duo and be basically destined to be together helping others if he didn’t choose Katsuki to fulfill that role. He could have just highlighted her with the suit thing, extend her hand, smile at him telling him to do his best, etc. But nah, let’s just have Katsuki tell him to come with him as a hero and imply they hold hands or extend their hands to the other even if they aren’t in need of saving.

Yeah, that’s bc he’s scared of shippers. Sure sure, whatever helps them sleep at night yk?

[ouidamforeman]

This may make me look like an idiot bc I can’t articulate myself BUT!!!!!!!! Big Queer Good Omens meta incoming

I want to talk about This Neil Gaiman ask for a minute because I figured out why I really like his blanket response to this “discourse” a lot but still somewhat disagree on the nuance, and why fandom attitudes about this bother me much much more than his open ended response like this one

Under a read more because im going to get Insane

First of all this is going to be riddled with my own viewpoints on queerness as a transmasculine nonbinary person who reads too much theory so if u disagree please be polite lol

So like. To begin with I really don’t think Neil is obligated to understand these nuances or even comment on them, let alone explain them to fans desperate for validation, so the fact that he’s been able to answer so eloquently is pretty impressive considering how vicious fandom is. But I want to specifically talk about what I think he means here and why that seems to bother fandom so much sometimes, and how fan interpretation of these ideas he presents can get Really weird and interesting imo.

In my view, Neil is answering this from a Doylist perspective, as in like. To the real life human audience, angels and demons are inherently queer because they don’t fit into traditional human definitions of genders and sexualities. This especially comes across in his insistence that Aziraphale and Crowley aren’t gay because they aren’t human men, but they ARE queer. This literally just looks to me like him saying “yeah so no angels and demons fit into these categories so they’re definitely queer from our perspective but I understand ‘gay’ as being two men and i don’t think that fits because it’s narrow” and while I disagree on some nuances here for reasons I’ll get into I think this makes total sense as an author describing how, from his perspective, an audience is intended to view these nonhuman characters.

However, I’m much more interested in a more Watsonian explanation of how A&C are queer, one that’s much more relativistic and honestly not something I expect Neil to go over every time he gets another ask about this???? My opinion has always been that A&C choosing human queer masculinity is significant and that it gives evidence to them being nonbinary, transmasc, gay, ace, aro, anything that people headcanon really. Because they are presenting themselves as queer in a HUMAN way in universe imo, which makes them queer not just by the standards of the audience but by the standards of other angels and demons in the story? I think that the fact that they were created as sexless and genderless and then CHOSE human gender presentations, whether nonbinary or not, that reflected themselves, and then them being in love with each other in a human way IS what makes them queer, not Just the idea that an angel without a gender or sexuality/romantic or other relationship orientation is inherently queer from the average human’s perspective. People who just want them to be Human Cis Gay Men are really missing this idea I think.

The thing is though. And I don’t think this is Neil’s problem to solve or whatever, nor does it mean “stop liking that angels and demons are genderless”. The thing that annoys the shit out of me. Is that fandom, even queer fandom, took Neil’s Doylist explanation of celestial beings’ gender status and just didn’t think any further about it. To this day people insist that A&C MUST be nonbinary forever just because they’re an angel and demon and were made that way. Like literally just inventing Fantasy Biological Essentialism again which is annoying as hell to me, another nonbinary person. Again, the fact that they were created without any sense of gender or biological sex and then chose any humanish gender for themselves at all whether nonbinary or not is what makes them queer in universe I feel. I think the “they’re an angel and demon so they’re inherently nonbinary and can’t be anything else” is shit tbh.

To reiterate, I think Neil is responding about this from a Doylist perspective aka “to the real life audience all angels and demons are queer because they don’t fit into human genders and sexualities” but I am focused much more on the Watsonian idea that A&C are queer in universe bc angels and demons can choose their gender presentations like humans can and everyone else hasn’t figured it out bc they haven’t been on earth to figure out what gender even is. I feel fandom gets weird about this because lots of people still see gender as something solely internal and inherent, when I genuinely don’t think that’s all it is. It’s internal feeling, external projection/behavior, and both of those as a reflection of social experience all at once. The feelings and internal sense of Knowing your gender or lack thereof is inherent to your self identity, but your gender is also informed by what you understand genders as, and what presentations you understand and have access to! Aziraphale and Crowley can be Human Genders because, because they’ve been on earth, they 1)know what gender is, 2)can see those feelings reflected in themselves, and 3)through that understanding choose how to present based on their feelings! They don’t just have to be genderless celestial beings in the sense angels are if they don’t feel like it anymore! They can be like “oh actually I’m a queer man” or “oh I’m nonbinary but in the way that I’m among humans and I’m not a man or woman.” I just feel like only considering them queer from a human or angel perspective but not both is sort of undermining the themes in the text against bioessentialism in favor of the instant validation of “oh they’re angels so they must be nonbinary.” Perhaps having any human gender presentation is queer to the average angel. Our internal feelings and sense of self knowledge as queer people is inherent. How we act on those things and assign meaning and labels to them can be anything! A&C can be anything they feel like! They don’t have to be the classic celestial beings above gender! I feel like they would love and have fallen into human gender customs just from so long on earth, and that doesn’t mean they can’t be nonbinary or agender. It means they, as a part of humanity, saw and understood human genders and realized what gender they were in relation, whatever you headcanon that to be. And that’s more queer than “god made them without sex and gender so I guess their species makes them inherently one thing”!!!!!!

[gothcsz]

Hiiiii! I hope this ask doesn’t come across as rude, bc I genuinely mean it in the sincerest, most flattering way that I possibly can.

I’m so desperate to read Neighbours, I keep seeing loads of good things about it and everyone seems to be raving over the ending, and the buzz and excitement it has generated is all over my dash! You must feel so lucky to have such wonderful readers who share your excitement!

My only problem is that I’ve had approximately 9 mental breakdowns in the last seven days alone (tip me) so I’m not sure I’m ready for the angst! 🥲 how angsty are we talking here? Like on a scale of 1 (happy ending) (I know it’s not a 1) to 10 (just kill me dead it would hurt less)?

And if I decide it’s maybe too much for me right now (but believe me, it’s up there on my tbr!), are there any of your other series/one shots you’d recommend that aren’t as angsty that I could get stuck into?

I’ve read unscripted desire and I absolutely adore your writing style and that series as a whole!

Like I say, I hope this didn’t come across as rude, I sincerely mean it in the most complementary of ways, and I’m sorry if it’s come across as any way other than intended!

I hope you’re am having a great weekend 💕

OMG HI HELLO MEGHAN! this wasn't rude at all, i'm actually so endeared at the fact you came into my inbox to ask this 🖤

raving? oh jeez, i didn't know that that was happening (sorry i have to make a meme reference any chance i get) listen, i thank my lucky stars every day for all the cool people who take the time out of their day to read the musings that live in my head 24/7. it really means a lot to me. whether it's 1 person or 100! on the dash, we all fam

okay well, firstly, i relate to that mental breakdown bit so hard omfg i literally spent majority of last week sick + depressed + rotting in bed because i was so sad (could it be a correlation to me finishing neighbors? perhaps... maybe...) i hope you're doing better now though, darling!

secondly, honestly i think it's a strong 7? but maybe my rating is skewed because of how much i've stared at each part while working on it LOL i tried to keep the vibes as similar as i could to narcos, if that's any help 🖤

wow i might actually pass out from how sweet you are UGH okay in terms of series recs, ME PERSONALLY, i would direct you to fantasize... (which i still have to finish but shh) if you're into frisky feline fun and a lil bit of angst. the smut in it is my absolute fave! or onlyfans!javi (closely aligned to pornstar!javi but they're different okay of!javi is modern) because he was hot and i need to subscribe to his page (i also have to write a pt 2 for that ...)

thank you for dropping by! i'd love to hear your thoughts on whatever it is you decide to read and i really appreciate ya being interested in my works 🥹🖤

[theeminentlyimpractical]

Something I think is often missing from the “shop local” refrain is the importance of consistency and building community in a local economy. I go to two local farmers markets pretty much every weekend, and have for nearly a decade at this point.

Today I went for a small handful of stone fruit and a pastry. I ended up coming home with a bag full of eggplants, carrots, and a massive amount of kale simply because one of the farmers (Gali) wanted to get rid of stuff. I didn’t even buy anything from her this week.

When markets were closed during the pandemic a baker (Joseph) saw me driving and backed up in traffic to say hi. He also razzes me across the market if I’m late, because it makes people stare and he thinks it’s funny. Recently I told a farmer (Mark) that I had been going to another market and he said “WOW. I see how it is,” as if I was cheating on him. One of the beef ranchers (Sarah) texted me a recipe after we got to talking. The pork farmer (Steve) has been in bad health lately, so a bunch of us are putting together a care package for him and his wife.

I pay cash (cash is king, baby) so if I don’t have enough I’ll often be extended an informal line of credit bc they know I’m good for it the next week, the way credit was initially intended to be used! Credit card fees eat into their already meager profit line, so it is above all a sign of respect to their hard work to take the time to withdraw cash to have on hand.

Of course, the deals aren’t the point. I didn’t set out intending to get free stuff. It is a byproduct of a mutual relationship, a sense of shared community, built over years. I got some sprouts today from a new-ish vendor, and saw that a few trays were almost empty, so I just told them, “fill me up with whatever you want to get rid of,” and they were delighted. Take the time to care, instead of treating it as a purely transactional relationship. Build community through commerce, and rote errands become moments of human connection.

[venture-through-the-mist]

Warframe Stuff…Because Why Not?

So, seeing as this page is definitely turning into a Warframe-specific blog (not that I hadn’t completely intended for that to happen, but that’s beside the point lol), I figured I’d post a little bit of a Warframe-specific introduction, to go along with my main one. I’ll probably try and update this somewhat frequently with any new links/posts/etc that I come up with, just so it’s easier for people to find things on my page.

Featured/Frequently Used Tags: warframe; lotus warframe; warframe spoilers; mist’s writing; mist’s personal rambles

For right now, I won’t be sharing my IGN, but that’s more because I don’t really tend to friend or chat with people that I don’t know well, so I don’t want an influx of random messages or requests lol.

Mastery Rank: I’m currently MR 17, though I’d probably be higher if I hadn’t spent my first 3-ish months as a Warframe player absolutely refusing to craft or use any Warframe other than my starter. Seriously…my second frame was Excalibur Umbra…I did not build a second frame until I played The Sacrifice quest, and at the time, if I could’ve avoided it, I would’ve.

Main Warframes: I’m a Mag and Saryn main at heart. Mag was the frame that I started out with, and I absolutely fell in love with her gameplay. I got into playing Saryn due to a friend’s recommendation for Steel Path, and honestly wasn’t expecting to enjoy her gameplay as much as I do, but I actually find her quite fun to play.

In general, I tend to enjoy the crowd-control frames or the ones that can do a ton of damage super quickly. I don’t usually enjoy support-type frames as much, but that’s just because my gameplay style tends to be more ‘Shoot/stab first, ask questions later’. Other frames that I like but aren’t my mains include: Gyre, Dante, and Revenant. Titania’s fun too, though I’m not nearly good enough to play her without bashing into every single wall on the map.

Although the frames listed above are ones that I like, I’ll never criticize or fault to someone for liking another frame. My view on the game is very much along the lines of “there’s a playstyle for everybody, and there’s no ‘good’ or ‘bad’ Warframe”.

Main Weapons: I absolutely love using the Nataruk. I really enjoy bows for whatever reason, and so this has been my go-to ever since I completed The New War. For melee weapons, I quite like the Harmony, but honestly as long as it isn’t a Glaive-type weapon, I’ll probably enjoy it (learning the Xoris was…more of a struggle than I’d care to admit). I never really care that much about my secondaries, so usually I use whatever.

Other Game-Related Info: I play on iOS! When I first started back in October or November of 2023 (I think, at least), I was genuinely shocked at the quality of the game and the fact that there’s so much content, with it still being free to play. The app is definitely still a little buggy, but that’s to be expected, and it still runs better than the vast majority of other mobile games I’ve played.

I tend to enjoy a little bit of everything the game has to offer. One week, I’ll be super into farming Duviri stuff, the next I’ll be focused on Railjack (as annoying as it is to me, I’m still trying to get Sevagoth). Or maybe one day I’ll be cracking relics nonstop and then switch to working through the Steel Path. I never really know what I’m going to do on any given day lol. I’ve been really enjoying running Netracells lately, not that I’m that good at them. I don’t usually play the Conclave, but that’s mostly because I can never figure out how it actually works (and…also partially bc I don’t like Teshin).

Now for the ‘fun’ stuff! I’ve been writing little things for my Operator since I started playing, and so sometimes I might post some things here relating to her or my Drifter. I also have an AO3 account, so I’ll post any fanfics on there as well.

Characters: Mag (Operator); Lēna (Drifter)

A lot of what I write has to do with exploring the relationship dynamics between Lotus and my Operator, Mag, especially as they—and the other Tenno by extension—become more of a ‘family’ after The New War, however, I have also written some more Lotus- or Mag-centric fics that don’t dive into that dynamic. I’ve also written a few that explore the dynamic between Lotus and my Drifter, Lēna (no, that does not involve shipping them, that’s just not my cup of tea lol). In general, I don’t tend to write a lot of shipping stuff, I like to focus on platonic/friend/familial relationships lol (I like to read that sort of stuff, I just don’t write it for whatever reason).

My Writing: AO3 or mist’s writing

Ongoing Series: Petals May Wilt (But We Can’t Let Them Wither)

My ask box is open for any questions/comments/etc, so feel free to send something in, and I’ll usually answer it as quickly as I’m able to!

[thebeardedsir]

WRT the pronoun question post, (also I’m not getting mad at you or trying to say you’re a bad person, I’m just trying to explain it bc you asked) :

Firstly not all trans people feel the same about being asked their pronouns. For most of us it’s okay/something we’re used to, but we aren’t a monolith; we each feel differently about issues facing our community.

The situation this post is describing is this: a cis person sees you, and thinks you look like you might be transgender but they’re not sure. They are very interested in finding out if your AGAB is what they think it is, but want to maintain a veneer of liberal/lefty politics. They ask you for your pronouns, and they will derive background information from your answer. If you are petite and don’t have a beard but say he/him they’re going to assume you’re assigned female at birth. If your very tall and and have a strong jawline they’ll assume you’re assigned male at birth. They’re not asking because the care about gendering you correctly, they’re asking for the same reason people ask what’s in your pants when your trans; and what’s worse is they know they shouldn’t do that so they’re trying to dress it up in inclusive language.

Asking people for their pronouns is not inherently good or bad. It depends on the context. If I meet someone and am unsure of their pronouns, I can ask them in private. If I meet them in the context of an inclusive social group or LGBT space I can ask them fairly openly. If I’m say, at my job or school, it’s best not to ask because it puts them in the awkward position of potentially having to put themselves, or lie and make you misgender them. Having been in that position before, it’s fucking awful.

Most of the time when I meet other trans people I don’t have to ask; in a social context I usually hear someone else use their pronouns first, or they’ll gender themselves in other ways to signal what their pronouns are. If I’m unsure but can’t ask for whatever reason, I’ll just avoid gendering them, or depending on context (ie. is it safe to be trans where we are) gender them in a way that reflects their presentation rather than whatever I may assume their AGAB is.

There’s a lot of subtlety at play here that’s probably difficult to grasp as a cis person. This post was kind of meant to be an intra-community thing. We’re not saying no one should ever ask pronouns, we’re discussing a specific micro aggression that a lot of us have experienced.

As a cis person, the just try your best to be kind, be mindful of peoples safety/comfort when asking for pronouns, and apologise briefly (don’t make a big deal out of it) if you make a mistake. You don’t need to understand the nuances of the trans experience, you just need to listen and be respectful. I can just about promise you that no trans person is going to throw it back in your face if you ask them their pronouns irl.

I don’t think I should have to explain why lying about “asking everyone” their pronouns to cover the fact that you’re socially inept around trans people is kind of a dick move.

The answer is sometimes people step on each other’s toes and feelings get hurt. All we can do is try our best to treat each other with respect.

I'd definitely prefer people come off anon to have this kind of discussion, but you're taking me in good faith and you've said a lot to help me understand the context which I appreciate.

"This post was kind of meant to be an intra-community thing."

I think that is where I made my biggest mistake. When I see something on social media I don't always take into account what the intended context is, because so much of the time these things will inevitably break containment and be misconstrued in the worst possible ways (perhaps present example included).

As a cis person I got to thinking about the kind of interactions I've had where asking for pronouns felt like the best possible way to start a social interaction. With my own anxieties, having that starting point can definitely feel like some solid ground to getting to know people in a way that I've been told is good and relatively safe. Living in a pretty lefty area, I hadn't thought about the more volatile repercussions of having these kinds of conversations in a public setting.

And yeah, obviously lying about the way you're choosing to interact with someone is fucked. I never meant to assert otherwise.

[likesunsetorange]

omg can i hear your thoughts about annie/armin as peeta/katniss i’ve been saying this for such a long time

omg yes!!! thank you for asking like nobody ever really sends me asks so this is so fun to me!!! also i’m sorry for getting on this train late but i’ve seen the light finally!

(also putting the preview thing bc i went on a long ass tangent, i told y’all if you get me started on this i won’t stfu 😭)

but my mutuals and i have been talking about it and we were saying how katniss is definitely not the kind of person who ever wanted to be a hero. she certainly isn’t a selfish person (her volunteering for prim shows this), but she never intended to be the forefront of a revolution. also katniss is very socially inept and pretty unaware, she thinks everyone hates her or she doesn’t like people but she constantly goes out of her way for people bc she cares! i think these are really similar (in my head at least) to how annie is. annie only became a warrior to help her dad (well he also kinda forced her but anyways), and her intention was always just to get back home to him, so that kinda reminds me of katniss. also annie is perceived as mean and aloof, but she’s just not the most social person and isn’t the best as socializing (i think this is most shown in aot jr high), and kind of misinterprets social situations, very similar to katniss! i think annie is a very caring and kind person but her situations have led her to be closed off and causing her goals to be the forefront of her mind, but towards the end of the series she realizes that people do care for her and starts to be more trusting/open (i.e. armin/mikasa/even reiner a bit) and we see a more lighthearted side of her (the okapi scene LOL)!! i think katniss and annie aren’t exactly the same but i see so many similarities between them, even with the whole aruani interaction too, it reminds me a lot of some of the more vulnerable everlark scenes. also annie is very aggressive and so is katniss, and that whole scene where katniss throws peeta into the wall after the whole “if it weren’t for the baby” shenanigans, that’s annie as hell LOL she wouldn’t want to be perceived as weak or vulnerable, it’s just not her

as for armin, armin is literally the equivalent to peeta to me. armin is actually my favorite character after eremika, so i adore the fact that he’s so similar to my favorite book character. i think armin is one of the most kind characters in the story, and his genuine care and devotion to mikasa and eren make me love him so much, but armin is also definitely a very manipulative person. he knew how to manipulate situations to his advantage in order to achieve whatever it is he wanted, and that’s definitely in line with peeta. peeta put on a performance as much as katniss did, but because he knew how to work the room and use his charms to his advantage. i 100% without any thread of doubt in me know armin is capable of pulling off the baby stint, because he would think of the same scenario, using the capitol’s pity to their advantage. being able to be manipulative stems from your ability to read people and your intelligence, and we can tell that armin is good at both of those (how he got eren to confess his true feelings for mikasa just by fucking around with him lol)!! also cute blond boy, blue eyes that’s so armin!!!! but beyond all the manipulation and working for the cameras, peeta did have a genuine care and he loved katniss his whole life, and armin had always been interested in annie as well and she was a bit naive to it too.

honestly i was never the biggest aruani fan (i like them but they’re not a fav basically) but seeing their everlark parallels made me have a new appreciation for the ship!! i could honestly say more but i just woke up and i can’t think of as many canon references to as i’d like!!! but sorry for going on a whole tangent i just love the hunger games a lot 😭

[hellsvestibule]

I miss academia only in the literary field tbh. Bc I always enjoyed reading and analysis but I kind of -need- to be prompted, I -need- other people to ask me things, bc otherwise I’m putting statements out there into the void unprompted vs whatever the spiritual successor is to your teacher handing you a sheet which says “what do you think this means” with the explicit understanding and willingness to offer you the grace your personal perspective on this author is going to be fucking limited, your intention to research them in their totality might be nonexistent. and this isn’t a moral defect, you just fucking want to read Something and talk about what you just read, 5 minutes ago. But you also aren’t seeking to be regarded as an expert, or someone who wants to read nonstop in perpetuity till you feel like you’ve learned Nothing, which is what I feel like a lot of people who read and discourse a lot about reading sometimes do.

Some people never stop they never pull back long enough to apply that knowledge to the present, which is why they exist in a sphere separate from normal people, who rightfully feel condescended to by this. Bc your basis and understanding of intelligence is “have you collected enough Information” to even be allowed to to perceive and form opinions on this isolated instance of what you’ve read. Instead it becomes a Sisyphyian task of further and further education which will lead you in circles and convince you that you can never know enough. Ergo you can never Be enough, to be worthy of stating your own opinions. Did you research the surrounding historical context? Have you read all of this authors works? Have you read the inspiring literature? Are you eager to provide in depth analysis and condemnation of this authors problematic opinions?

Wheras I want to sort of, beg to the importance and validity of sometimes having a limited perspective, and needing to clumsily navigate the learning process, rather than immediately being presumed one of 2 alternatives, an expert, or someone with no right to speak on a subject, period.

Can -you- the person who is more educated than me, summarize whatever makes this prolonged research and knowledge of the subject important, sustinctly, within reason, or are you presuming the need to engage with this thing in its entirety is necessarily meaningful to my capabilities as a human.

When engaging w someone less educated than you, on any subject, it’s your duty as the expert, within reason, Not to gatekeep people who are just passing through. I.e. when a non artist shows me a drawing, i do not critique them as someone who intends to spend 20+ years getting to the level of skill and understanding I am at, I speak to them as a person passively engaging with a hobby and praise them for their attempts, offering minimal advice if they are interested. Ask yourself. Are you actually keen on imparting this wisdom on others or are you just weaponizing it to make them feel stupid and morally deficient.

[alyjojo]

Thinking of You - June 🤞 2024 - Cancer

Whole of their energy towards Cancer: Page of Pentacles

In the preshuffle I saw a break between you and this person, and the sentiment that you’d like to work things out and move forward, but that they’re a “my way or the highway” sort of person, very arrogant, bossy and demanding - and you can’t really work with that, can you? I’m not seeing the same cards here, but I am seeing Marionette, which shows you feeling controlled by them. If you speak your mind or try to bring resolution, you’re dealing with someone who is going to act out and “punish” you for doing so. Is that who they are or this specific situation, idk, I find it hard to believe this behavior can only be one situation, yanno? So that’s for you to chew on.

I do see them wanting to apologize for whatever has happened, two cards showing an apology here, and it may be a message - along with something. Doing you a favor, offering you something, a gift, some kind of tangible thing you can see or touch. This isn’t over.

Feelings: Death rev

See? Not over. Not to them. This would also indicate there’s been no *real* action taken. So if you live together, they may not be speaking but they’re one room away and don’t intend on actually going anywhere. No effort being made to leave, but there’s no conversation telling you how they feel either - and an apology is pending but not reality, yet.

Intentions: The Moon

Whatever your issue is, they don’t really understand - so them apologizing is kinda pointless but they know it’s what you want and what they have to do to get back into your good graces. Do they mean it? No, not really, they don’t even know what they did wrong. They’re afraid of losing you though. The Hanged Man rev clarifies as like…an *inability* to see outside of their own perspective. They literally can’t. Maybe you went silent and didn’t tell them why you’re upset. The Devil rev is positive though, sorta. Do they have good intentions - yes. Do they have any idea how to fix the problem you have without knowing what that is - no. If you would consider them or something they’ve done/said as toxic, they don’t know that or have no idea how to change it.

Actions: The Fool

They’re just gonna YOLO it, they’re coming back around to try and talk to you, butter you up. Maybe offer you something. Cook you dinner. Take you out. Anything, but again there’s some kind of gift or tangible thing involved. That’s their thing. They want the stress to end, don’t like not speaking, they just want everything to get better and today we start over. Everything is fixed now. I can’t see your perspective with that but that’s their perspective. You’re seeing manipulative and I’m just seeing clueless. Could be, you’d know best.

Messages:

Their side:

- OBSESSED 🤩

- Boujee

Your side:

- Marriage Material 💍

- Honest!

Possible signs:

Heavy Pisces, Gemini & Virgo

If you’re dealing with:

Temperance shows a chill month with calm and balanced interactions - or that’s the goal. 10 Swords rev underneath could be like playing damage control or trying to put the pieces back together after a difficult situation you or others have endured - which you’re doing successfully. At least you’re not drama, but you can’t help what other people do 🤷‍♂️

Aries - doesn’t come around or make an effort because they don’t see the potential of it going anywhere positive

Taurus - can’t continue moving in a new direction bc they can’t break free from something old

Gemini - there’s unfinished business and a lot of healing that needs to take place here 🤕

Cancer - a secret or hidden information coming out makes the decision they weren’t actively trying to make before - now they can’t

Leo - feels abandoned by you, like you aren’t giving what they are and that the connection isn’t reciprocated, could be financially

Virgo - moving forward in a positive direction, both of you are creating exactly what you want

Libra - quitting something, could happen very quickly

Scorpio - defending flirtatious behavior because they will die being ��right” - or switch it - someone isn’t interested in the other’s perspective

Sagittarius - done talking to or having anything to do with you, could be a person firing you - or they’re just…a harsh, sharp talker, greedy, time is money and they’re being rude or calling you out - or switch it 😬

Capricorn - confused about what the decision to make is - regarding everything in their life

Aquarius - cutting through delusion and bs, it would be silly to try and come at them any way but *logical*, if it’s a romantic thing, they think you’re full of bologna or starry eyed over nothing

Pisces - if you’re waiting for this person to grow up, enjoy waiting forever, your version of grow up will never be their reality - 3 Wands rev indicates never

[dodger-sister]

Sufficiently freaked out enough I turned on the alarm & locked the doors & put a chair under the door handle. Yesterday we rescued a cat that we had seen around the neighborhood the last week or so. She was on our porch staring in at Sis, so Sis went out & the cat jumped in her arms & started loving on Sis.

So we started our rescue routine: put her in basement guest room separate from our animals, posted on my FB & 2 local missing pet groups, called the shelter (waiting for call back) & intended to take her in to get scanned for a chip, if needed by tomorrow.

Today on 1 of the FB groups there was a comment “that’s my cat”. Something about it felt weird. When my dog went missing & ppl posted they saw him here or there, trying to help us catch him, I would reply “omg thank you, yes thats my dog!” Or whatevs. She just posts, “thats my cat.” So I went to her FB & it looked legit enough, just tons of other ppl’s missing animals & motorcycles. *But* there was no post about her missing a cat. Scrolled back 3 months, nothing. I was going to message her & ask for a photo of the cat, just to verify, since ppl do use cats as bait for dog fights around here. I understand when you are missing an animal, you can be beside yourself, so I shoulda messaged her immediately, but I was tending to things with my own pets & around the house & didnt respond immediately (ie within the hour). Thats on me.

But then I get a phone call, “you found a cat, thats our cat,” from some dude. I said “howd you get this number?” He says, “From the internet, you can search anybody nowadays.” GUYS, my FB profile name is my nickname, not my legal name! You cant search me & find me bc all searchable stuff is either from voter registration or state ID. How did he connect my nickname to my legal name? WTF. Then he says, “my gf is out looking for him - it’s a him - right now. I just gave her your address - *says my address* - that’s you, right?” Im shaking now. “How do you have my address? Someone is just coming to my house?!” I tell him I will NOT be answering the door until my sister is also here. He says, “she’s a 65 year old lady, its fine.” I said, “no, its not & my dog is super protective of me & he doesn’t let me open the door for strangers.” He says, “just bring the cat out to her then .” I stupidly, giving away that I’m disabled or whatevs, said, “cat is downstairs & I can’t do the stairs, you’ll have to wait until my sister comes home. Tell your gf to come back at 5.”

I ask if the number he has called from is his & he says yes & gives me his name. I say I’ll have my sister call to arrange a pick up. Im outside, so I go in, lock all the door, cant get the 1 door to lock properly so I put the chair there. I also turned on alarm & have my dog here, but Im freaked.

I inform Sis & she calls him. He tells her he got my number from 1 of those online Find A People sites. Thats a creepy thing to do. & then to just send someone to your house. What if a stranger just showed up at your front door asking about SM post you had made, without you having given out your info? How would you feel? Sis told him to send her a photo to prove is their cat. So then I go back to the missing animal site & there are a few more comments from the same lady, 1 saying his name is Cletus & the other saying, “We live on *street around the corner*. Please is a outdoor cat. Let him out & he will come back home”.

Ya’ll we live in the city limits! Yeah it’s only a 35k population but we have busy streets & a huge drug problem, have been labeled in the top 10 worst cities in our state, just a bad place to let your animals roam free if you want them to stay safe. Not to mention we aren’t far from the city edges, where we have coyotes. I know I had indoor/outdoor cats in my early 20s in town, but I was young & stupid & raised with barn cats so didn’t know any better. This lady is 65 years old! Yes I’m judging!

My friend is coming to stay this weekend & wanted to adopt the cat. If is theirs, obvs we hafta return it, but Id rather my friend adopt it. Rather my friend than ppl who let it roam in the city & then stalk you online & call you outta the blue & try to roll up on your house unannounced. Fuuuuuck. Also yeah he went missing, bc he begged us to let him in our house, we thought we were helping!

(Anyways, by the time I typed all this, it has been confirmed he is their cat, so we will return it to them later. In a public meet up spot.). But ya’ll, I’m wigging. WTF?

[the1975attheirverybest]

So I read the Buzzfeed article that’s been going around and ngl it’s pretty brutal… as a newer fan, I never listened to podcast so this is the first I’m hearing about the whole�� “ghetto gaggers” thing.

Is it real? Was Matty serious? Is there more context/info people aren’t getting? Did he ever elaborate on that? Bc right now I’m kinda… Icked out a bit. Please tell me it’s not as bad as it looks.

- 🔆

So, we had our debate about this a couple of months ago. I’ll summarize and give context and do my best to be impartial.

Synopsis and context:

What happened was, Adam and Nick (the two hosts of the podcast) were talking about visiting London and stuff. Then, Adam said that he was there recently. Visiting with his gf. He even texted Matty to come party with them. Matty said that he has to do a show the next day and doesn’t want to go out, but that they can come round to his house and hang out if they want. So, they did. Adam’s gf brought a bunch of her friends with her, too.

Matty says they ended up talking about music and he put YouTube on his tv and they watched a bunch of stuff. The ladies started dancing and having fun. Eventually, they left. While outside, waiting for their Uber, one of the girls discovered she had forgotten her water bottle. So she ran back inside to get it, and she walked in on Matty touching himself.

That’s the end of the story. Matty laughed and said that “the order of operations as a single man in his 30s is that you have a wank and you go to bed.” And that he just feels bad because it was the girl, olive (that’s her name), she seemed sweet and innocent and it’s kind of embarrassing for him cuz it wasn’t even 30 seconds after they’d left. Like they were all still outside.

That’s when ADAM NOT MATTY said “yeah you were probably watch Ghetto Gaggers jerking off” [for context: ghetto Gaggers is a professional porn site that specializes in “white men on black women”] and Matty just laughed. Nick then said something about how wild it is that you can now watch porn on tv and they moved the conversation towards whether or not it’s better to put it on the big screen. Matty said something about preferring to watch it on his phone. Someone made a joke about how it can even be played on Apple Watch and imagined a guy at yoga trying to do a workout and his watch starts to play porn and stuff. Type dude humor. Whatever.

Fan “analysis”

Everyone took the Ghetto Gaggers thing and ran with it. Some opinions are more valid than other. I present them to your judgement as follows.

When the pod first aired, of course people crucified him for it.

When we discussed it on here someone pointed out that the line “cuming to her lookalikes” is starting to make a lot more sense now.

We discussed whether porn categories like white men x black women is just kink, racial fetishizing, etc. should we be condemning Matty’s taste and behavior, all that stuff.

MY PERSONAL TAKE

it was a disgusting joke. But it was a joke. Cuz Adam is the one who made it, not Matty. Matty stated the facts of what happened. That he started touching himself as soon as his guests left and that he feels like Olive thinks he’s a creep etc. idk if you’re familiar with Adam and Nick’s work but they had a show before this one called “Cum Town” part of it included making up distasteful “jingles” about cumming lmao. Like songs where they replace lyrics with awful sexual jokes. So, this is super on par with Adam’s sense of humor. He probably just said it to be provocative. Like, in his head, he was probably like “what’s the worst thing that Matty could have been jerking off to? Ghetto Gaggers.” NOW, it gets even more fucked up if Adam said that BECAUSE he knew of Matty’s recent split from Twigs and was therefore implying that Matty fetishes black women. But because I was not inside Adam’s head, I don’t know if that’s the case. I don’t know if it was intended to be an insult towards twigs or to simply be something for shock value. Either way, it was a disgusting joke. But it was a joke and I don’t think we should treat it as fact or freak out about Matty’s personal values because of it.

That said….the entire podcast was laced with shit like this so it just kind of came up as one of a million other things that people were upset about. Buzzfeed needs to fuck off.

Hope this helps. Sorry if it doesn’t :(

[infinitelyweary]

Mmmmmm…

Most of the people I’ve seen who have no/little interest in the books are black/poc fans of the show. The show, which has two black leads and engages with race (specifically blackness) in a way that is constructive and critical of white hegemony as opposed to the books which are decidedly less so.

I think it’s pretty reductive to say black/poc fans of a tv show are being “shallow” or “obsessed with complete moral purity” for not wanting to read a book that expresses racist ideas about black people/pocs, or for being uncomfortable with (or “contemptuous of”) fans who are uncritically enthusiastic about the same. I can’t speak for white show fans who aren’t interested in the books, but I don’t think they should be lumped in with “moral purity obsessives” for being openly critical of/not wanting to read a book series rife with racist ideology either.

You say (paraphrasing) “I get how the bits and pieces of ignorance that bleed through her writing…could dissuade someone from reading the books.” Okay, so you do understand that some fans would be uncomfortable with the racism in TVC and would not read it as a result.

But then you say “Do you really refuse to engage with anything made by people that haven’t reached whatever level of enlightenment you deem necessary? Aren’t you tired?” So now it’s incredible to you that someone wouldn’t want to engage with TVC due to the racist elements? Which is it? Aren’t we tired of what? Not reading books we don’t want to read?

It’s interesting that you frame your argument around the racism in anne rice’s books, but then you claim it “seems” like the outright dismissal of her work is the result of “obsession with complete moral purity”. Why would an anti-racist fan’s dismissal of a racist work not be due to a disinterest in reading something racist? Why rearrange “some people might not want to read the books bc of the racism” into “ppl who refuse to read the books are moral purity obsessives”? Why attempt to minimize the racism of the books by saying anne was not “remarkably racist”? If those who stubbornly refuse to read her are simply “obsessed with moral purity” with only “shallow criticism” to offer wouldn’t the degree of racism in her books be irrelevant to your argument?

As a black fan who loves the show and has a love/hate relationship with the books (which yes, I am currently reading) the hate side of which is in part due to the racist elements, the false dichotomy presented in a lot of the discourse (including your post) around them which tends to separate fans into “ppl who read the books/moral purists”, is deeply frustrating. Some people just don’t want to read a racist book for fun. It doesn’t make them a moral obsessive or close-minded or “shallow”. Some people who do read the books will have criticism of them, and sometimes that criticism will concern race. That’s not an obsession with moral purity, it’s just critical thinking.

I’m sure you didn’t intend it this way, but this post feels more like a desire to silence discussions of racism in the books than an interest in a more nuanced view of anne’s work.

Was Anne Rice racist? I'm sure she was, but like, not remarkably so. no more racist than any other ignorant white person who has long since settled into their beliefs. I completely understand why one would be uncomfortable with that. I get how the bits and pieces of ignorance that bleed through in her writing, as well as some of the heavier themes she wrote about, could dissuade someone from reading the books. I'm not saying anyone has to read the books. But the complete dismissal of anything she's ever written solely on the basis that "Anne Rice was racist", as well as the contempt towards anyone that does engage with the source material which I have seen swathes of the amc iwtv fandom engage in seem like shallow criticism derived from an obsession with complete moral purity. More so than any kind of problem with the actual content of said books at least.

It's not a phenomenon exclusive to either iwtv or racism but. Do you really refuse to engage with anything made by people that haven't reached whatever level of 'enlightenment' you deem necessary? Aren't you tired?