#bc they found forgiveness and healed in the end

[t-lostinworlds]

This is such a random train of thought but I came across a comment on a fanfic saying something along the lines of "people don't usually change" / "forgiving them is unrealistic" / "your character is pathetic for giving in" and while valid in some, if not, most cases, thinking that it applies to everyone and everything all the time seems like such an unhealthy mindset to have. In my opinion at least.

Don't get me wrong, I hate it when forgiveness is served on a silver platter where the person apologizes once and then all is suddenly forgiven. But if the person provided an explanation all while not passing it as an excuse, took full accountability of their actions, truly apologized and showed regrets, and then took the time to better themselves, worked hard to improve and then continuously show that they're a much better person now and had grown after years. Is giving a second chance really that criminal? Especially when forgiveness isn't even given right after that and it's still a slow and steady journey of building that trust where everyone's starting on a clean slate rather than jumping right where they left off.

I don't know, maybe this is just me always trying see the good in people, but if you really don't think that a person has the ability to grow and learn from their mistakes, (which everyone will make often) all while constantly showing and proving that they have grown and learn, then that's a bleak way to see things. It's just a sad way of thinking that just because a person made a mistake (obviously depending on the mistake), they're forever branded as a bad person.

It's like, needing people to be perfect and wise right off that bat, putting them on a pedestal where you think they won't ever make mistakes and once they inevitably do, suddenly they're never going to change and learn from it and they're always going to be a horrible person. And that just seems so…toxic.

Obviously, things are much, MUCH more complicated in reality. Some people never do change, some don't deserve forgiveness at all, and some are genuinely just horrible and vile human beings who deserve to rot. But thinking that everyone is like that?

Just, not everything is so black and white you know? Sometimes things are just various shades of grays. Humans are messy and complicated as fuck but that doesn't mean it's a bad thing.

[meo-eiru]

Breaking my lurker status (forgive my english I don't speak the devils tongue/j)

1.-I LOVE YOUR BLOG SO SO SO MUCH PLSSS-- you write so good and you draw even better it's so fun to see a notification pop up bc it also means I can see the silly people that also like your characters just as much as I do! I find it so cute to see all the different ways people live this characters I love it💥💥

2.- I beg of thee, to spare a crumb if One Eyed monster once again (when you have time bc remember to rest, eat and drink aguita💥), I've been OBSESSED with that one since I saw your first post about him, I just find him so endearing!

Like imagine scene! He is just so head over heels over by us but be doesn't have the courage to come talk to us, but oh! What's this? We are going out of our way to talk to him? HE MUST BE DREAMING! And we are just gushing over how cute he looks with his hair covering his face bc it makes him look so tiny and sweet that we can't help but reach to touch his face and in his daze we move just a little bit of his hair and he only notices that we have seen his full face when he can see more clearer (bc having so much hair in front of your only eye must never tough) and he just PANICS-- like just completely and utterly scared that he takes off running already crying and thinking that we will never wanna see him again and that we are disgusted by him, he only stops in an alley far away to catch his breath.

But in his break down he fails to notice how we ran after him, yelling for him to stop, following him to the alley and seeing in a front row seat how he is just completely broken saying between sobs how we'll hate him now.

But we never had hated him to begin with, we found him cute at the start so we got close to him, and when we saw that big doe-eye it was like staring at the most beautiful star in the sky, we would never hate him after all.

He doesn't hear our steps towards him, he only reacts when he feels our hand lightly touch the top of his hair, his head snapping up to see who it was, his heart almost jumping out of his chest when he sees it's us, both with joy and sorrow, I mean, we are probably there to mock him right? To tell him how ugly his one eye is and to tell him we never wanna see him again, after all,

¿If not for that why else would the one person he loves more than everything be there before him after seeing his one eye?

When he only manages to babble a weak - why? Here? You...Huh...? -

But we don't say anything, we just kneel down and hug him, holding him close, letting him cry in our shoulder, with one of our hand rubbing comforting circles on his back and the other petting his hair, waiting for his cries to stop.

When they do all we say is a simple couple of words, almost got loud enough but just for him to hear, leaving his once broken heart renewed and beating so fast he feels he might have a heart attack.

- You are even more beautiful than I could ever imagine... -

Something so little to anyone else, but something so big for him that he doesn't think his fragile heart could take anything else.

But he doesn't need anything else, he only needs this,

He only needs you

(I propose the name Jade for him, ¿why?, bc when I first saw him I related him with one of my favorite gemstones💥)

-Yummy-

Oh my god this healed my soul, improved my grades, my eyes and skin are shining, world peace is happening, global warming ended and there’s no longer world hunger.

It just means so much to him, he’s so different from everyone else, he’s a monster. There’s no way you could love a creature like him who can’t even talk to you directly without exploding from nerves. He’s not handsome, he’s not charismatic, he’s not funny, he’s just a stalker who’s too pathetic to breath the same air as you.

Only thing bringing a bit of solace to him is the fantasies he has about you. Holding hands, going on dates, watching movies and cuddling, you saying you love him even if he’s a monster… Yes fantasies, such a thing can only happen in his fantasies.

So what’s happening right now? Is he dreaming? You’re so warm he can’t think straight. You think he’s beautiful? This can’t be real surely he misheard you. He can’t talk from the tears rolling down his eye. Please forgive him for getting your shoulder wet. He’s so just so, so happy right now. All he can do is hug you back and sob as he prays this is not just a dream.

[p4nishers]

reading fool's fate and its really insane to me that fitz did All That. like. he was ready to sacrifice anything and everything to save beloved and when he realized he couldn't, that beloved had been right all along, he literally begged for forgiveness and still he did not give up hope that beloved was alive until peottre told him otherwise where he almost FAINTED and from then on he was almost dead to the world. burrich, his father in all the ways that mattered, was dying yet he could not grieve bc the fool was already dead. because of him. he went thru the motions, feeling nothing at all, or feeling so much grief it physically drained him. fucking. every single time he even THOUGHT of beloved's dead body he was on the verge of fainting or did faint. but even then he knew he could not and would not go back without burying beloved first bc he never liked the cold he couldn't stay in the ice forever he would hate that. and so he went on and he mourned and mourned and mourned and did not stop and when he found beloved's body he pleaded with everyone to help him, to heal him, what do you mean you couldn't feel him he was there in his arms, fitz was holding him, he was THERE. but they couldn't help him. he wasn't there. and from that point on, fitz was not dead, but something far more dangerous. he was heartbroken. grief stricken. mad with loss. he didn't kill the pale woman bc he didn't want to let go of beloved. he couldn't. and THEN when it was finally time to let him go, he couldn't do it. he said goodbye with the custom of beloved's ppl, naming beloved as fitzchivalry farseer bc he was. he was. his death killed fitzchivalry farseer. let him burn with his beloved. but he could not light the fire. instead he said he would die in place of beloved if only the gods would let him live and when the gods did not help he went into beloved's body, not caring that he might not come back to his own, and fixed him. rebirthed him anew. and they were one. fitz was beloved and beloved was fitz and they did not begin or end. and then he held beloved thru all his nightmares and all his days, missing him even as he was right there. god like why did he do that to me

[viennakarma]

i was thinking of the ending where the reader moves on!! i was interested in what luna would think happened bc i thought she would see that lewis is still clearly in love with her mom but her mom obviously moved onto to fernando.

but i am biased to the ending where reader forgives lewis (bc lewis is my main man <3 hehe) so i really appreciate that perspective!! i do feel like even tho reader has forgiven and moved on by the time luna’s a teen, lewis would low key still carry that guilt. he seems emotionally driven for sure (to me) and he was dreading the day luna found out bc she eventually would, in the age of social media

i would love your thoughts on lewis’ perspective as well (either when it happened or when luna asks him about it) bc as someone who went thru something similar (we were never dating but it still hurt lmao) i still cannot wrap my head around the betrayal even tho it was years ago at this point. so seeing lewis still be in love w reader and truly regret his actions heals a part of me even tho this is fiction hahahahaha.

love your writing btw ❤️❤️❤️

ohhhh thank you so much! I also went through something similar (i guess that's why say something feels so raw to read and all over the place with emotions)

so you wanted to know how lewis would carry that guilt after losing the woman of his life? (evil laugh) it sparked me to write a bit, so here it goes: (keep in mind the post wreck my plans headcanons)

((also, written in the format you = reader))

Growing up, Luna had slowly become aware of her father's feelings for her mom. She knew the story, they had fallen out of love, divorced when you were pregnant with Luna. But as she became a pre-teen, and a teen, she started to really pay attention to the way Lewis looked at you. During her school games, Luna was a midfielder in football, she'd notice how Lewis' gaze would linger on you, the longing almost unbearable for a couple of seconds before he was able to scold his expression and look away. When Fernando arrived, wrangling Luna's younger siblings, Lewis would go back to his normal, polite self. When he'd drop Luna off at your house, Luna would notice the way Lewis stared from his car, looking at you and Fernando playing with the children in the backyard, using water balloons under the heat of the summer, how you'd embrace Luna and immediately let her join in the game. Luna started to grow aware of this, and by the age 15, she'd be completely sure that her dad still had feelings for you, and she would know that you had no feelings for him. Because the way Lewis looked at you was the way you looked at Fernando.

Luna decided to dig up, one night. She had a limited and monitored access to the internet ever since she was little, and with the years, she just wasn’t big on internet and social media, rather spending time with her siblings, her friends and family or her many hobbies. But with google, it didn’t take long for her to find a specific video. It was at a press conference, back when her dad was a racing driver, someone asked him what his thoughts were on his ex-wife, Luna’s mom, dating Fernando, a fellow racing driver.

Luna stared at her dad in the video, the dim in his eyes when he said his marriage had ended for unrelated reasons and that he was the only one to blame, since his loyalty as a husband had faltered and he was the one to fail the vows he had made to you. Luna closed her laptop with a slam. She wasn’t dumb. She was fifteen and loved English classes. She knew what he meant with loyalty faltering.

She got upset, she had never thought cheating was the reason for the divorce, not when you and Lewis had told her that they fell out of love. She grew moody for a couple of days, short tempered and rude, you and Fernando had thought it was only teenager moodiness, so you let Luna be. When she confronted you, two days later, she spilled the truth of what she had found out, Fernando, sensing the moment, took Vicenzo and Benny to his family’s place for the weekend, knowing you and Luna had a big conversation coming.

You explained to Luna what had happened, why you were the one to divorce Lewis. But you were kind, always reminding her that her dad had always been a good father, always taking care of Luna and how you and Lewis loved her no matter what. After that talk, Luna got calmer, but she asked you to not go to her father the following week as they had agreed on. Lewis was distraught when you called him to inform that Luna wasn’t going to his house that week and she didn’t wanna go camping as planned anymore. When you told him over the phone that Luna had found out… you could hear him crying.

After giving Luna a week to give her space, Lewis went to your house to find her. They decided to finally go on that camping trip under the condition that he’d answer all of Luna’s questions about what had happened.

She was silent for most of the trip. Once they arrived at the cabin, they sat in the backyard, Lewis lit up a bonfire and Luna and him sat around it, burning marshmallows in the fire.

“Do you regret it?” Luna asked, breaking the silence. Lewis exhaled for a second.

“Every waking moment,” His voice faltered.

“Why, then?” She muttered, looking straight into the fire.

“I don’t know. Back then I had been upset, having had a couple of bad seasons in Formula 1, feeling useless, feeling like I wasn’t able to do the one thing I knew how. I had a couple of drinks, and someone from my past showed up… And I made a mistake that cost me my happiness, my future and the love of my life. Looking back now, all of those were silly reasons for doing what I did. They weighed nothing compared to your mom and our marriage…” His voice was wet with tears and Luna didn’t have the heart to look at his face yet, “Your mom, she even tried to fix things for a few weeks after I confessed. But I could see… I could see the love she had for me dying more and more every single time. When we signed the divorce, she was already pregnant with you. We decided to become friends to co-parent for you.”

After some silence, Luna looked at Lewis, the tears in his face.

“Will you forgive me?”

“Of course,” She reached out, wiping his cheeks of tears. He closed his eyes, a weight leaving his shoulders at the acceptance and she hugged him. Lewis couldn’t help but see you in Luna, in her caring embrace and her forgiveness.

After a few quiet moments, Luna pulled back.

“How… How was life when you two were married? You know, before all this?” Luna asked, “Mom never talks about it.”

“Why do you wanna know, baby? It’ll only hurt you…”

“Because I have no idea how it was.”

So he told Luna about random things of those few years you were married. He told her how you’d draw and leave charcoal stains everywhere, and how upset he’d be, Luna would tell him you rarely ever use charcoal nowadays, but every few weeks Fernando buys you new colors of paint and asks you to paint him something. Luna told Lewis how all of Fernando’s offices are full of colorful paints you made him.

Everything Lewis told her, Luna would counter with how things were nowadays. And each time it hurt his heart a little. Fernando didn’t make you travel around the world anymore, Fernando helped you take care of the garden, supporting you most recent hobbies, Fernando who gifted you with a little rescue kitten, a scruffy little thing you had always wanted but didn’t get because the kids were too small back in the day.

Lewis started to see how he had failed you many times even when you were married, even before the cheating. How he had been unsupportive of your hobbies, of your career, of your wishes.

He knew he’d spend the rest of his life wishing he could come back to that one fateful night and never get in a hotel room with that woman. He’d know what to do now. He’d know how to go home straight to you, how to cherish you, how to support you.

But it was too late, and you had found someone who did all that without the need to make a mistake to value you for who you are.

note: damn, this really ran away from my hands too phew

[achaotichuman]

Hello!!! I was wondering if you have recs for pro-Tamlin fics, fics where he gets a happy ending in general? Or where the Night Court get called out on their bullshit with a side of pro Tamlin bc I’d devour them but have a hard time finding them (I love your fics btw)

Sure do!

Pro Tam fics can be difficult to find. I found all of these scrolling through either the Tamlin redemption tag, or the different relationship tags on AO3.

I'll link all the fics here. I'll put all the summaries and the relationship that goes with them, if there is a relationship. This is a list of all my personal favorite Tamlin fics, but these creators make other amazing Tamlin fics, and scrolling the pro Tamlin tag can take you to some really cool fanfiction.

A Court of Threads and Daises by @shi-daisy. Tamlin/Lucien.

Tragedy almost struck the Spring Court when Tamlin Evergreen tried to take his own life. Lucien Vanserra manages to save his former Lord, but not his power.

Now that the Spring Court has a new High Lord and the horrors of war are behind them, both Tamlin and Lucien agree to help the new heir navigate court life and attempt to rebuild the broken Spring Court, along with healing themselves.

They weren't expecting to fall back in love in the process.

A Second Chance by @goforth-ladymidnight. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra. Modern ACOTAR AU – There is a reason that Tamlin disappeared from Lucien's life seven years ago. Lucien just doesn't know what it is. They were more than college roommates; they were best friends. Now, a chance encounter in a bookstore leaves both of them wondering if they can pick up where they left off. A new year is right around the corner, but there is no wiping Tamlin's slate clean. Featuring Jurian and Vassa in supporting roles, this is not a story of redemption, but of finding love—and forgiveness—in the most unlikely of places.

Lovely and Lonely by @praetorqueenreyna. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

"In hindsight, Lucien thinks he fell in love with Tamlin the moment he first laid eyes on him."

**************************

Lucien Vanserra must come to terms with his sexuality, and his complicated feelings for High Lord Tamlin.

Wildflower by @mathiwrites. Tamlin/Rhysand.

Five hundred years before Feyre’s arrival in Prythian, the humans fought against Faeries, led by the King of Hybern, for their Freedom. Tamlin is only seven years old when the war begins, but his family’s involvement and a fated friendship with a handsome young Lord from the Night Court will change his life forever. This is the story of how he becomes the High Lord you know and love, and the redemption story nobody asked for.

TL;DR - before they were enemies, they touched butts.

A Court of Beasts and Chances by M4r0u_Mar. Tamlin/Tarquin.

About a Beast who must be prince and a Prince who wants to be beast. About a Prince who learns of second chances and a Beast who learns of redemption. About looking for love and finding it in the journey rather than the destination.

Or the one where I rewrite ACOTAR to make Tamlin and Tarquin mates.

A Court of Choices Made by Anonymous. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra. Lucien decides to go after Tamlin to pick a fight after his first Winter Solstice with the Night Court.

I see red, I see nothing by AngryRamen. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra. Lucien travels to Amarantha’s domain to try and bid for peace between her and the courts of Prythian. It doesn’t go well.

Still Beautiful, Still Mine by @goforth-ladymidnight. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra. ACOTAR AU - In the weeks following his visit to Amarantha’s Court Under the Mountain, Lucien is still recovering from the loss of his eye. Nuan has made him a replacement out of gold, but the scars on his face are there to stay. When Tamlin comes to see him, Lucien cannot help but relive the events that brought them to this point, if only he could focus on what's standing right in front of him...

A Sunbeam Shining Bright Into the Night by @nocasdatsgay. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

After the Great Rite ritual is completed, Tamlin always goes back to the Manor to see if Lucien is waiting for him. This year he is.

Forbidden by @nocasdatsgay. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra. Calanmai has come once again, but Tamlin isn’t focused on the females waiting for him.

Breezing on by Sprighnt (SliPuP_Slit). Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

His focus was shattered when Feyre dropped onto the bench next to him with a dramatic sigh, “You won’t even say hi after you ditched us last week?”

Lucien rolled his eyes at her antics, “I didn’t ditch you, I was studying for math. The exam of a subject that I need days to prepare for, remember? I didn’t think you’d even notice me gone, what with all the ogling that takes up your time in our practices.”

“Shut up!” She shushed him, glancing around wildly for any eavesdroppers, “what if he heard you?”

——— Lucien has settled into a routine now. He’s finally able to go back to competing after an accident that had him wondering if he’d ever be able to skate competitively again, he’s out of his hellish childhood home, and has friends that make him happy.

By the Fountain by Sprighnt_(SliPuP_Slit). Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

Tamlin is tired of stuffy dinner parties, luckily, he has his best friend, Lucien, to make things more interesting.

———

Tamlin took the time to look at Lucien, who was staring at an elegant fountain nearby. He examined the dip of his nose, the scrunch of his brows, the slight part of his lips that indicated he was contemplating something. Then Lucien’s mouth set in a firm line, meaning he’d made up his mind on whatever the issue was.

Lucien glanced back at him and Tamlin startled at being caught watching. He placed his hand gently on Tamlin’s arm, “I don’t think my father will plan one for me either.”

New Springs by Sprighnt_(SliPuP_Slit). Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

“I can’t be here for as long as you,” she clarifies, gesturing to the forest around them.

“You’re leaving?”

She shrugs, “It’s nice here, but my sisters, my father, they’re my only family. Even if they’re, a little difficult at times, and I don’t want to hurt Tam. I was really in love with him, but, to put it plainly, I’m not like you.”

“Like me,” Lucien repeats, confused, “what do you mean?”

———

In another universe, an alternate timeline, Feyre says “I love you”, before she’s sent off and therefore breaks the curse the way it was supposed to be broken. Things are different.

absolution by @praetorqueenreyna. Feyre/Mercenary Lady, Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

Things didn't work out between Feyre and Tamlin. Years later, they both find love in unexpected places

Beauteous Evening, Calm and Free by franklinarchive. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

Tamlin heals and then he moves on.

Or, what if Sarah J. Maas hadn’t committed ‘character assassination’ against Tamlin?

When The Sun Came Up (I Was Looking At You) by pansexual_intellectual . Jesminda/Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

There was a slight choking sound from the Night Court side of the room, but when you looked, Lucien was expressionless, adjusting his doublet.

It was the worst idea you had ever had. In the shreds of your manor you dropped to your knees. He was gone in the morning, as you knew he would be.

Burning Batter by Sprighnt_(SliPuP_Slit). Tamlin/Rhysand. Rhysand comes over to make cupcakes with Tamlin for Feyre’s upcoming New Year’s party.

A strange thing happened the night of the High Lord meeting by @umthisistheonlyusernamenottaken. Tamlin/Rhysand.

Tamlin shook his head, a small smile on his full lips. “You forget that we were closer than friends once. I know your face. Even when you think you’re being so clever, hiding behind that mask of impassivity, I see you.”

He snarled, even as his heart began to beat faster as the other male approached him.

“You think I didn’t see you? You couldn’t stop looking at me during that meeting.” He took another step closer, and his next words were tinged with playfulness, a hint of the Tamlin he’d used to know.

“Were you thinking of that night too?”

He froze. “What?”

In the Eyes of My Beloved by Alynaw66. Tamlin/Rhysand.

I promise, Rhysand sighs into his mouth; Then down onto the slight curve between his neck and shoulder. Tamlin shivers, feeling dazed. Overwhelmed.

“Another offer,” he begins, one hand sliding down to grip Tamlin’s narrow waist.

(Also fun fact about this fic, I was brought to Tumblr because of a link in the notes, so without this fiction I wouldn't be here)

Stay or Go? by SoulOfStars. Tamlin/Rhysand. Both of their families are dead. Rhysand decides to stay. They fuck in the second chapter.

heaven sent a hurricane by @praetorqueenreyna. Tamlin/Eris Vanserra. After his family is killed and he is crowned High Lord, Tamlin struggles to keep his Court under his control. (Un)Luckily for him, Eris Vanserra steps in to help.

A House of Flame and Flower by Mellowenglishgal. Nesta Archeron/Tamlin, Nesta Archeron/Azriel.

“Spare me the self-righteous lecturing, Feyre. You and your new family believe yourselves superior: that anyone who is not deemed worthy by you must bow or be eliminated. I refuse to bow to those I do not respect: and I owe none of you any such obligation. Nor am I obligated to remain where my autonomy is threatened,” Nesta sighed, gentle yet commanding, her voice low and steady and unyielding. “I renounce all ties to the Night Court. From now on, you are no longer my sister.”

“Where will you go?” Feyre snapped, but Nesta saw it: the sudden realisation that Nesta meant every word.

“That is no longer your business. Goodbye, Feyre,” Nesta said softly. She rose to her feet, elegant as an empress despite her unkempt clothing. As she stared down her youngest sister, Nesta caressed the delicious power shimmering like slumbering embers deep in her heart, until her veins sang with silver fire, pure light, blistering heat, deadly yet silent.

Flame was silent: everything it met shattered and snapped, disintegrating, unable to withstand it.

She was flame. She was undiluted, unrefined, unapologetic power.

She told Feyre, “You will not hear from me again.”

(Side note, I just started reading this fic and it looks FREAKIN amazing) Edit- Anyone who saw that I changed the name of the author to a tag, ignore it, I was wrong.

A Court of Lies and Resurrection by @ashintheairlikesnow. Tamlin/Rhysand. AU: Feyre is dead, torn apart by Amarantha when Tamlin did not send her away in time. Tamlin, forced to submit to Amarantha's terms, finds himself looking for help (and finding affection) in places he never expected, while Lucien allies with an ancient enemy (and one of Rhys's closest friends) to save him. WARNING Extensive explicit adult content, sexual situations, violence, MA

In This Peace Series by @trshtffc, the first fiction in the series is completed The Sorceress . Tamlin/Original Female Character.

Seven years after ACOWAR, Spring Court is struggling to keep from falling apart completely. A mother tries to move on and keep her daughter safe in this chaotic world, but when the young female most needs a friend, she'll give the disgraced High Lord a chance to attone for the pain he has caused, and, perhaps, to finally heal.

TW for - mentions of suicidal thoughts - mentions of loss of a pregnancy - mentions of sexual abuse - mentions of emotional abuse (toxic relationships and toxic family dinamics) - colourism - LGBT+phobia

(This one was recommended to me in the replies of this post, and it looks so good)

And finally, (shameless self-ad) A Court of Song and Desolation by me. Tamlin/Lucien Vanserra.

She had eyes like starlight and a grin that could outshine the moon, "We'll rule the world."

"What if we fail?"

"Then we'll burn it all down."

In hindsight maybe it could only have ever ended like this. Making a man who was never made to rule, High lord. This was all inevitable.

With his Court in ruins and everyone gone, Tamlin lives amongst the broken pieces of his Court and has no intentions of changing that. Lucien, however, will not stand to leave his oldest friend alone.

When Lucien takes Tamlin back to the human lands, they discover a darkness coming for Prythian. If something does not stop it, it will completely rewrite the way Faeries and humans alike live as they know it

I hope you like these amazing fics as much as I do, anon!

Edit- If anyone has any recommendations for pro Tamlin fics, or anti IC fics, please let me know and I will add them to the list!

[kelongt]

an episode of community that I wouldn't say I hate but also under no condition like is episode 2 of season 6 "Lawnmower Maintenance and Postnatal Care"

It just doesn't make sense to me.

In season 2 episode 13 Annie gets bribed with money by pierce so he can manipulate her into giving him control over the script of a play Annie wrote. Annie, living in a terrible neighborhood and worried about not being able to afford living takes the offer.

And of course when the study group finds out that the play they were partaking in about drugawareness, just for Annie (bc it's a personal cause to her) sold it's message to pierce, they get pretty upset at both Annie and pierce.

This ENTIRE episode we see how Annie (or anyone) shouldn't be depending on someone for /depending on anything, like money.

It's a lesson Annie learns at the end of the episode.

We watch all that and multiple episodes of the study group being a found family and having fun together, trusting eachother and learning from eachother JUST to watch episode 2 of season 6 and find out that oh this ENTIRE time the study group has been taking bribe money (and possible other things) from Brittas Parents BEHIND HER BACK and when she finds out and is visibility upset not just the study group but everyone around her ridicules her for it.

During this whole episode Britta is the butt of the joke for cutting off her parents for guess what, being genuinely toxic shit parents.

Britta has a good reason to hate her parents HOT TAKE this whole episode fails so much in not letting anyone around her see it too but no haha britta is an idiot literally everyone even some random kid on the street hates her

Frankie and Britta bonding is maybe the only thing good abt the episode imo

You could've made this an episode about healing and forgiving and moving on from your past instead of running away from your problems.

You could've made Brittas character even dumber by giving her an utterly ridiculous reason to hate her parents.

You could've maybe made an episode about her brother(s) because as mentioned S1 ep1 she has one (or two idk) or just like over all maybe a cool Episode giving her character more depth again BECAUSE THATS POSSIBLE!!! (SHOCKING I KNOW)

Maybe I forgot to mention a few things this isn't really a deep dive but I just felt like ranting

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi!! Love your acc, it's really useful for fics <33 I was wondering if you knew any fics that elaborated on the morgue scene (the one where john beat up shrelock) bc i always felt it was very brushed over in the series and frankly i think it needed to be elaborated on more.

Hey Nonny!

Ahh, yeah, I think I've been asked this a few times and I've just not ever posted a proper list. So because I need a list for this week, here's all of my TLD-adjacent fics I found doing a tag-search AND from old replies to other asks! Hope you enjoy, and add your own if you have them, friends!

TLD FIX-ITS / AFTERMATH of TLD 

BOOKMARKS

Bridges by sussexbound (M, 6,602 w., 1 Ch || Post-TLD / S4 Fix It, Love Confessions, Mending Relationships, Moving Back In, Pining Sherlock, POV Sherlock, Past Abuse, Shaving) – The silence between them is deafening, interrupted only by the hum of the traffic outside, and the soft click-clunk of the plastic cups Rosie is playing with on the floor beside them. It is the first time they have been alone together, since Sherlock’s birthday. It’s only been two days, but it feels huge, important, like there is a precarious bridge stretched out before them both that they need to at least attempt to traverse.

The In-Between by blueink3 (M, 10,679 w., 1 Ch. || Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Parentlock, Fix-It Fic, Canon Compliant) – Beginning in a Chinese restaurant and ending at the bottom of a well, what about the moments we didn’t see?

Drawn to Stars by Silvergirl (E, 109,272 w., 60 Ch. || S4 Compliant to TLD / TFP Doesn’t Exist, Sherlock’s Italian Adventure, Sherlock/OC and Johnlock, Jealous John, Mutual Pining, Misunderstandings, First Kiss/Time, Idiots in Love, 3 Part Story, Slow Burn, Inexperienced Sherlock, Bottom Sherlock, Introspection, Multiple Alternating First and Third Person POV, Separation and Reconciliation, Emotional Love Making, Love Confessions via Letters, Angst with Happy Ending) – After the Culverton Smith case Sherlock is clean, working, and looking for a romantic partner—since John has told him that’s what he needs. Shame John didn’t mention he was interested in that role himself, before Sherlock went off to Rome with a gorgeous Italian copper to try to fall in love and become a complete human being.  Part 1 of the Drawn to Stars series

MARKED FOR LATER

toasting to grief by slylyaddictedtostories(T, 181 w., 1 Ch. || Poetry || Post T6T / TLD, Missing Scene) – John mussing over a drink about (missing) Sherlock and everything (he) they lost

Reconciliation by standbygo (T, 221 w, 1 Ch. || TLD Missing Scene, 221B Ficlet, Fix it Fic) – A missing scene from S4E2, "The Lying Detective". The hug was beautiful, but I wanted to add to it. My mother once said to me that you can forgive on your own, but you need to reconcile together.

My Heart Beats For You by jalexandria (M, 1,212 w., 1 Ch. || Hanahaki Disease AU || TLD Divergence, Angst, Non-Canonical Character Death, Sad Ending, Drugs, Pining Sherlock, Hurt John, Death Fic) – Things go very, very badly when John makes a horrible mistake.

Sherlock chooses himself by thewallflower07 (G, 2,035 w., 1 Ch. || Post TLD / No TFP, No Parentlock, Dialogue Heavy, Sherlock is a Mess, Sherlock and Feelings, John is Not Good, Angst) – Sherlock is a physical and emotional mess after John beats him bloody during the Culverton Smith case. He visits his therapist, who tells him to be selfish for the first time in his life. When John appears with his daughter and asks him to move back, Sherlock has to make a very difficult decision.

Reasons Wretched and Divine by Anyawen (G, 2,218 w., 1 Ch. || TLD Fix-It, John Has Issues, Admissions, Apologies, Explanations, Conversations, Emotions, Injury Recovery, Hurt/Comfort, Sick Fic, Drama & Angst, Declarations, Suicide, Assault, Marriage, Death, Drug Use, Guilt) – In the aftermath of Smith's arrest, John faces his anger and his regrets, exposing his vulnerabilities to Sherlock. They find ways to heal together.

Antiseptic by LipstickDaddy (G, 3,599 w., 1 Ch. || S4 / TLD Fix-It, Unseen Moments, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional / Psychological Abuse, Mutual Pining, Love Confessions, Protective Mycroft, Protective Greg, BAMF Mrs Hudson, Requited Unrequited Love) – What did John hear on that secret tape from Culverton’s hospital?

It Is What It Is by SpookyPorg (T, 3,874 w., 1 Ch. || TLD Fix It, Angst, Hug Scene, Love Confessions, Pining, Happy Ending, Making Out, Grief, First Kiss / Time) – After the very traumatizing events at the hospital, and John's heroic last-minute rescue, Sherlock is recovering at 221B. Doing his part to keep Sherlock under strict supervision, John pays a visit to his old flat for the first time in months. Reconciliation leads to confession.

The Tragedy Of Us by LipstickDaddy (G, 3,898 w., 2 Ch. || Post TLD, Angst, Romance, Tragedy, Hurt / Comfort, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Miscommunication, Requited Unrequited Love, Ambiguous / Open Ending) – John reflects on his relationship with Sherlock while the man is convalescing in hospital— twice.

wires Series by highfunctioningsociopath (M, 5,000+ w. across 2 works || Series WiP || Post T6T / TLD, Angst, Hurt / No Comfort, Loneliness, Mind Palace, Survivor Guilt, Mental Health Issues, Drug Addiction / Abuse, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Sherlock POV, Missing Scenes, Introspection, Psychological Trauma, Abusive Relationships, Grey Mary, Withdrawal, Depression, Self-Esteem Issues) – The road to Hell is paved with good intentions, after all. It just so happens to be lined with self-destruction.

I Want to Hear You Say It by LollipopCop (M, 8,000 w., 2 Ch. || TLD / S4 Fix It, Suicidal Thoughts, Heavy Angst, Love Confessions, Suffocation, Crying, First Kiss, Pining Sherlock, Happy Ending) – Instead of making Sherlock say he doesn't want to die, Culverton Smith forces Sherlock to repeatedly confess that he loves John before his death.

The Waning of Withdrawal by LoloLolly (E, 8,248 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TLD Fix-It, First Kiss, First Time, Mentions of Abuse, Mentions of Alcoholism, Mentions of Drug Addiction, Sexual Identity, Panic Attacks, PTSD, Sherlock's Scars, Bed Sharing, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Grief, Guilt) – Sherlock holds a weeping John in his arms and… does something that will forever change things between them. For better or worse. He fears the latter.

Slowly Suffocating by meet_me_in_samarra (M, 9,500 w., 7 Ch. || TLD Fix It, Suffocation, Hurt / Comfort, Whump) – Getting suffocated took some time. Enough time for Sherlock to ponder what went wrong. Hopefully also long enough for John to arrive and rescue him. Culverton Smith applied more pressure, impatient to turn Sherlock into a dead thing. A continuous story written for Whumptober 2023, following the 31 prompts for each day.

And Then There Were Two by NimWallace (T, 10,194 w., 20 Ch. || Post S4, Mutual Pining, Case Fic, Slow Burn, Angst, Grief / Mourning, Mystery, Cults) – It's quiet at Baker Street. Too quiet. It's been a year since Mary died, but only a few months since the events of the Final Problem, and Sherlock and John have fallen into a state of despairing and monotony. So when a case involving a vicious cult on the English Country side appears, they quickly jump to go undercover as Sean Harmony and John Wales. But how can Sherlock keep a delicate John from breaking? And how can John come to terms with his love for his detective? Most importantly, what really happened the night of the Final Problem?

The Death and Resurrection of a Beekeeper by shiplocks_of_love (M, 12,922 w., 1 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || TLD / S4 Fix-It Fic, Sherlock’s Retirement, Sussex / Seaside, Brief Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts, Emotional Trauma, Angst with Hopeful Ending, Estranged Friends to Lovers, Partial Epistolary, No Eurus) – Sherlock escapes London for a quiet, solitary life in Sussex, exhausted after the whirlwind of drama following Mary’s death. One day, a letter arrives.

A Midnight Clear by khorazir (T, 13,120 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas-Carol Inspired || Post S3/Post-TLD / TFP Doesn't Exist, Christmas, Angst, Fluff, Pining, Canon-Typical Violence, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Implied / Referenced Drug Use, Magical Realism) – It’s Christmas Eve, and Sherlock is working. Because that’s what he does. He doesn’t need Christmas, or holiday cheer, or even company. He’s fine on his own, thank you very much – until a series of strange encounters on his way back to Baker Street makes him reconsider.

The Ashes on the Ground by 221Beloved (M, 13,545+ w., 5/22 Ch. || WiP || Post-TLD, Miscommunication, Pining, Depression, Angst with Happy Ending, POV Sherlock) –What happens after? After the fire has burnt down and left nothing but ashes? Roughly two and a half years after what happened at Smith's hospital, things have settled. But have they really? Or is it all still hovering. And what if someone whirls up the ashes again? An old acquaintance. Can something new arise from cold ashes? Something stronger?

Entitled by Ranowa (T, 14,023 w., 2 Ch. || TLD Timeline, Canon-Typical Violence, Drug Use, Paternal Lestrade, John’s a Bit Not Good, Sherlock is a Mess) – Lestrade draws a line, because he knows Sherlock won't. 

Hope is a Subtle Glutton by isitandwonder (E, 15,753 w., 1 Ch. || No Johnlock, Sherlock/OMC, Racism, Aftermath of Violence, Happy Ending) – This is a story about Sherlock Holmes finally finding love and the happiness he deserves - just not with John Watson.

Angry Men by FawnHickory (M, 16,975 w., 16 Ch. || WiP || Post TLD Morgue Incident, Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Self Examination, Big Brother Mycroft, Past Abuse, Sad Sherlock) – Greg gave John some things to consider in Destroy Him. John faces some uncomfortable truths about himself. Part 2 of the A Good Man and An Angry Man

What It Can Be by amaruuk (T, 18,310 w., 1 Ch. || Post TLD, Healing Friendship, Mutual Pining, First Kisses, Cake) – "Which is why we're all taking it in turns to keep you off the sweeties." With the help of his friends, Sherlock is healing from drug overuse and physical injuries. He is also trying to salvage his friendship with John with the hope that, perhaps, they can make it something more.

Hot Water Bottle by khorazir (T, 18,436 w., 1 Ch. || Post TLD / TFP Doesn’t Exist, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Misunderstandings, Communication, Demisexual Sherlock, Bisexual John, Autumn, Bed Sharing, Developing Relationship, First Kiss) – A case in one of the remotest corners of the Lake District, a storm, an inn, a broken boiler, a room with two beds but only one hot water bottle, and two men who have a lot to sort out between them – all of this makes for a night to remember.

Contrition by sussexbound (E, 18,556+ w., 5/? Ch. || WiP || Post-S4/TFP Didn’t Happen, Rosie Doesn’t Exist, T6T/TLD is Canon, Year After TLD, Light BDSM, Soft Dom Sherlock / Sub John, Punishment, Light Bondage, Light Masochism / No Sadism, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Tenderness, Aftercare, Forgiveness, Edging, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Mutual Masturbation, Hand Jobs, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Frottage, Communication, Sexual Negotiation, Sexual Tension, Spanking, Head Injury, Anal Sex) – “You’ve been tense ever since we got back, itching for a fight, all your usual tells, but why…?” The truth strikes like lightning. “Oh… Oh! You’re not angry at me. Not this time. Well—maybe a little. But mostly, mostly you’re angry at yourself. Why? For falling behind? For not being there in time. For not taking Wilkes down fast enough?” Sherlock waves a dismissive hand. “It doesn’t really matter.” He lifts a finger to his swollen cheek and cut eyebrow. “You blame yourself for this. And you offered to fix it. But I wouldn’t let you, and… But that’s not what you really want, anyway, is it?” John looks stunned, a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming lorry, frozen, waiting for the lethal strike. “You don’t want me to let you help. At least not right away. No. What you want, what you really want is—punishment.”

The Nearer Your Destination by Silvergirl (E, 18,949  w., 6 Ch. || Post-TLD, Established Relationship, Wedding, Venice Honeymoon, Parentlock, Jealousy) – After a December wedding, Sherlock takes John to Venice for a February honeymoon. It's absolutely perfect, up until the moment he hears John growl, "What the hell is Zanardi doing here?" Part 4 of the Drawn to Stars series

Repentance by LollipopCop (E, 19,782 w., 2 Ch. || Post-TLD/Post S4 Fix It, Not TFP-Compliant, John-Centric, Angst, Self-Loathing, Hugging, First Kiss/Time, Rosie, Love Confessions, Crying, John’s Issues) – John cannot understand why Sherlock even wants to look at him after the horrible way he acted, and his guilt is destroying him. Why doesn’t Sherlock snap at him, scream at him, treat him the way he deserves?

The Slings and Arrows of Outrageous Misfortune by Sherlockwatsonholmesblog (M, 20,455+ w., 4/7 Ch || Post TLD, Five Stages of Grief, Estranged Friends to Lovers, Implied / Referenced Suicide, Self Hatred, Slow Burn, Emotional Trauma, Recovery) – There seems to be something tragic in a friendship so coloured by romance, for they have loved each other immensely. However, Some Days, love isn’t enough. Sherlock and John persevering, as always.

Becoming Us (A reunion in three parts) by addicted2hugh (E, 23,207 w., 3 Ch. || S4 Fix It, Pining Sherlock, Grief/Mourning, Hurt Sherlock, Hurt/Comfort, Protective John, First Time, POV Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Light Parentlock, Bottom Sherlock, Self-Harm, Drug Addiction, Sherlock is a Mess) – After watching Mary's last message, Sherlock and John try to be the "Baker Street Boys" again. Rebuilding the destroyed flat is the easy part. Will they manage to rebuild their friendship as well? And what did Mary mean when she said: "And if I'm gone, I know what you could become."?

Danger Nights by khorazir (T, 23,591 w., 3 Ch. || Post-TLD, Friends to Lovers, Mentioned Parentlock, Pining, First Kiss/Time, Winter, Folklore, Wales, Spooky Elements, Bed Sharing, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Spooky Elements) – According to folklore, the nights between Christmas and Twelfth Night are the most dangerous of the year. During them, the Wild Hunt rides, and ghosts and demons come out to haunt unsuspecting and misbehaving folk. An investigation of a series of strange occurrences leads John and Sherlock to Hay-on-Wye on the Welsh Marches, to face ghosts weird and ancient as well as close and personal – and perhaps to start the new year on a more hopeful note than the previous one.

the silence of your words by dyingofangst (E, 27,326 w., 6 Ch. || Post TLD / TFP Isn’t Canon, Case Fic, Estranged Friends to Lovers, Kidnapping, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Angst with Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Bed Sharing, Night Conversations, Self-Esteem Issues) – Three years after John decided to distance himself from Sherlock, Rosie is kidnapped and John asks for Sherlock's help. But they're not what they used to be, and even if they learned how to heal on their own, there are still many things left unsaid between them, things they'll have to put aside to focus on finding Rosie, while both hoping it's not too late.

under the burden of solitude by subtext-is-my-division (E, 27,947 w., 5 Ch. || S3/S4 Fix It/Post TLD, Angst, Grief/Mourning, First Kiss, Mentions of Rape, Hurt/Comfort, Pining Sherlock, Sherlock POV, Fantasies, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Suicidal Thoughts Mentions, Five and Ones) – Five times they shared a bed platonically, and one time they didn't.

Entangled by missselene (E, 29,044 w., 13 Ch. || Original Male Character, One-Sided Johnlock, Online Dating, Lonely Sherlock, Dancing, First Kiss, Oblivious John, Dev. Rel., Jealous John) – Sherlock knows John will never return his feelings. So what if he decided to look for love elsewhere? Part 1 of the Sherlock & Sanjay series

Lessons in Astronomy Series by CaitlinFairchild (E, 31,164 w. across 3 stories || Angst, Post S3, Grief/Mourning, Mildly DubCon, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Physical Abuse, Oral/Anal Sex, Unrequited Love, Pining, Sibling Incest (No Actual Holmescest), Masturbation, Accidental Voyeurism, Drug Addiction, Romance, Dev. Rel., Trust Issues, Happy Ending) – In a different time, a more naive time, Sherlock thought he was the star and John the satellite, circling him in worshipful orbit. He knows now that was never true. John was always the sun, bright and fierce, and Sherlock was the pale, cold moon, his only heat coming from the light he reflected. And then his sun went into supernova. Moriarty said he would burn him and he has, and John is the fire, his rage and grief incinerating Sherlock, burning the heart out of him in the end, turning him into nothing but cinder and ash. And now the supernova is collapsing, a black hole born where there was once warmth and heat and love, and Sherlock is being pulled down, down past the event horizon, into the endless frozen void where nothing can ever escape.

A Case for Domestic Propinquity by SilentAuror (E, 32,308 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TFP / Post S4 Fix It, Romance, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Domesticity) – As Sherlock and John renovate Baker Street with Rosie underfoot, Sherlock can't help but wondering how he could possibly convince John to just stay indefinitely... [TRANSLATIONS: 中文-普通话國語] | Русский]

Afghan Bullets, Beards, and Unlocked Bedroom Doors Series by addicted2hugh (E, 38,761+ w. across 2 works || WiP || Post-S4, Bearded John, Porn With Feelings, Friends to Lovers, First Time, Virgin Sherlock, References to Canon, Flashbacks, Mutual Pining, Hurt/Comfort, Drug Use, References to Suicide, Grief/Mourning, Top Sherlock, Reunion) – Set after series 4. The boys are living together again, and John's new style drives Sherlock crazy. He's trying to keep his besotted heart and over-excited libido a secret, but John has other plans. Lots. Of. SEX. And love.

A Thing With Peas by khorazir (M, 39,5537 w., 3 Ch. || Post-S3/Post-TLD/TFP Doesn't Exist, Fluff and Angst, Communication, Demisexual Sherlock, Asexuality, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Pining, Idiots in Love, Friends to Lovers, Developing Relationship, Implied / Referenced Drug Use, Parentlock, First Kiss) – Sherlock does the laundry. John cooks a thing with peas. They talk. Finally.

Limerence by SherlockWatson_Holmes (NR, 41,763 w., 17 Ch. || S4 / TLD Fix It, Character Death, Drug Use, Slow Burn, Angst with Happy Ending) – Limerence (noun); The state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person: typically characterised by a strong desire to maintain a relationship with the object of love and have one’s feelings reciprocated. S4 fix-it, starting on the tarmac.

Nocturne by SilentAuror (E, 47,927 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4 / S4 Fix It, Trauma, Bed Sharing, Friends to Lovers, POV John, Sherlock Whump) – When Sherlock is injured at a crime, an avalanche of suppressed trauma opens up. John ends up moving into his bedroom to ward off the nightmares, hoping against hope that this arrangement can last indefinitely. This is a story of nights spent together, trauma recovery, and John finally learning some truths long hidden.

The Night Is Darkest by missselene (E, 48,461 w., 8 Ch. || Post-TLD, Extremely Dub Con, S4 Rage Monster John, Insecure Sherlock, Self-Esteem Issues, Sexual Exploration, Healing, Self Care, Self Acceptance, Sexual Exploration, Casual Sex, Gentle Sex, Sherlock/OMC, Threesome with 2 OMCs, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Communication, Internalized Homophobia, Relationship Negotiation) –  Sherlock Holmes would do anything for John Watson... and that includes letting John do whatever he wants to him. What would it take for Sherlock to stand up for himself and finally start taking care of his own needs?

Borrowed Ghosts by DiscordantWords (M, 57,216 w., 10 Ch. || TLD Divergence / TFP Doesn’t Exist, Minor Lestrolly, Pining Sherlock, John’s a Mess, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Ghost Mary, Guilt, Forgiveness, Drinking, No Hug Scene) – In the aftermath of the Culverton Smith case, John spent one painfully stilted afternoon hanging out with Sherlock. He counted the minutes, finished his tea, and left for home without ever clearing the air between them.And once he'd left, he found it very hard to go back.

Lost In A Good Book by khorazir (M, 68,552 w., 6 Ch. || Magical Realism / Discworld Elements || Post TLD, Miscommunication, L-Space, Developing Relationship, Parentlock, Demisexual Sherlock, Bisexual John, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Bookshop) – After chasing a criminal into a poky second-hand bookshop, John and Sherlock find themselves not only stuck in the building, but in L-space itself. With things still raw and unsettled between them after the events surrounding the Culverton Smith case, this adds another dimension to their predicament, which not only constitutes of finding a way out of the shop (while avoiding getting murdered by the criminal), but also to finally address the issues between them.

This Would Make You Happy? by Ranowa (M, 71,217 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TLD Fix It, Past Viclock, Past Sherlock/OMC, Therapy, Protective John, Drug Use, Pining, Autistic Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending) – John, more than anything else, wants Sherlock to be happy. Sherlock, more than anything else, wants to make John happy. These two goals are not as in sync as one would think.

"Merry Christmas" I wrapped it up and sent it with a note saying "I love you" by starrysummernights (E, 135,132+ w., 30/31 Ch. || WIP || Post S4, Slow Burn, Mary is Not Nice, Christmas, Fluff, Smut, Angst, Parentlock, Past Torture / Rape) – John has moved back into 221B with his daughter Rosie after Mary was killed, but things are not exactly comfortable between him and Sherlock. After everything that has happened, they are trying to become friends again...and maybe something more. What better time than the Christmas season?! Takes place after TLD.

Limitless Ocean by angel-loving-star (M, 150,730+ w., 21/36 Ch. || WIP || Post-TLD / S4 Fix It, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, John's PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, Sherlock Whump, Alcohol Abuse, Past Drug Addiction, Fluff, Parentlock, Coming Out, Nightmares, Panic / Anxiety Attacks, Dissociation, Alternating POV, Suicidal Ideation, Self-Harm Ideation, Internalized Homophobia, Closeted John, Angst, Insomnia, Domestics, Cuddling / Snuggling, Gay Sherlock) – Sherlock is recovering from the Culverton Smith case. But there are some things that time or body can't heal. When John and Rosie unexpectedly move back in 221B the day after Sherlock's birthday, nothing is as it used to be. Both he and John are treading on thin ice. It is only a matter of time until the first cracks appear. Until they begin to sink into the freezing waters of the ocean beneath, and are forced to face their demons, each other, and what has been lurking in the dark for far, far too long. Until it is only them, the promise of sky above the surface, and the limitless ocean flooding into their hearts.

The Chemist by TheGracefulBlueCat (M, 158,385 w., 46/? Ch. || WiP || TLD Fix-It, Drug Use and Withdrawal, Hurt/Comfort, Doctor John, Protective Mycroft, Sick Sherlock, Medical Procedures, Grief/Mourning, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Nightmares, Mental Health Issues, Victorian Sherlock, Asperger’s Sherlock, Sherlock Is Not Okay, Papa Lestrade, Drunkenness, Autistic Sherlock, Synesthesia, Insecure Sherlock, Angst, Sick Fic, Case Fic, Asylums) – Sherlock returns to Baker Street and faces detox. But he feels too exhausted and bad to go through it fully conscious, so he - once more - uses his mind palace to distract him with an old case. But due to his drug issues and the tension between him and John things don’t work as smoothly as everyone hoped they would, confronting Sherlock and all his friends with more of their demons than they would have liked to.

Radioactive Trees In A Red Forest by Maribor_Petrichor (E, 280,251 w., 73 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Post-S4, Suicidal Ideations, Alcohol / Rx Drug Abuse, Coming Out / Bisexual John, Seizures, Past/Referenced/Implied Child Abuse, Hallucinations, Rehab, Celibacy, Sobriety / Relapse, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Psychological Trauma, Nice /Not Anti-Mary, John’s POV, Parentlock, First Time, Angst, Switchlock, Angst with Happy Ending) – John Watson is what happens when a man can no longer see a reason to go on. John Watson is what happens when a man starts to let go. "It is what it is." John Watson is what happens when what "it is" becomes too much to bear. This is a story of the life, death, and resurrection of John Hamish Watson.

[charles-simmons]

Very unpopular opinion, but I love the Dsmp canon ending

Specially after we found out they've lived multiple lives (as Eret said, it was like a cycle. Every time it resets, they just start again with no memory). So, PLEASE, let me explain this one

I think a big part of the reason why people dislike that ending is bc it felt like the story was interrupted and there still so much to happen and to develop, but personally, that's part of their tragedy. All of those people, living together over and over again in different complex and messed up lives that they don't quite get an end to.

There was still so much left to happen for those people. So many unsolved mysteries, so many people that never got to heal. It's extremely frustrating to think about it, and there were probably so many other lives where the same thing happened. To me, it adds such a cool layer to their story and it leaves us wondering if in a next live (or in the past ones) they ever got their actual ending. Will their souls ever truly rest? Or are they doomed to never getting closure?

Now, another reason people don't like it's bc of Tommy saying sorry to Dream, which also sounds crazy to me, because that was perfect

It wasn't like was he was forgiving him, or even as if Dream was being redeemed. To be honest, it wasn't even that much about Dream at all.

It's about Tommy. Because no matter how much people hurt Tommy, he genuinely believed no one truly deserved dying. The only reason he was even doing that plan was because he thought killing dream and punz was the only option left. So when he realized that maybe there could be another way, he instantly regretted his decision. He was apologizing for taking away their lives, taking away their chances of changing. It's really not about if they deserved it or not (like, c'mon, dream did abuse him), it's about how Tommy died trying to believe there could be good in people, even people who did terrible things. And that shows so much about him. How even after all that trauma, the hope never left him. You might think that's just being naive, and it probably was, but it's something in Tommy that survived through everything. It's a huge part of his character that never quite died, even after all his deaths.

He and Dream becoming friends in the next life was also interesting, and it would've been awesome to see how that went. In better situations, did Dream ever got to the point he previously had? Are people really inherently bad or toxic, or could've they grew into a healthy friendship? Also, did Tubbo and Tommy got close in that life too? They did stay together until the end of the world, but after that?

Seriously, it had potential. It's a shame we didn't get that sequel, but even without it, I don't think the ending is as half as bad as people say it is. It's not perfect, but it's still kind of awesome.

Well, if you hate the ending and still read this, a particular thank you to you. Also, if you disagree with what I said, feel free to give your reasons, I'll read them too :3 /gen

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

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1. Hi! For the next fic finder, can you please help me find a modern wangxian omegaverse? Its a survival dating show where the participant doing challange with their choice of partner. JYL and JZX was mentioned as a participant in previous season. At the last challange, it's a mating run where WWX and LWJ get trapped in a cave because of earthquake. Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

FOUND! 🧡 shoot your shot -- hot or knot by defractum (nyargles) (E, 51k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Reality Show, Hunger Games Setting, Canon-Typical Violence, Extremely Dubious Consent, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Humor, Additional Warnings In Author's Notes)

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2. hello! it's been bugging me and I'm thinking of this fic where lxc turns himself into a baby and wangxian end up having to raise him all over again bc he leaves a letter telling them he doesn't want to remember all the sworn brother debacle??? I can't find it AT ALL I'm going crazy please helpp... and thank you for your hard work all the time we really appreciate it !!!!!

FOUND? how do i forgive myself (for losing so much time) by thunderwear (M, 26k, WangXian, Age Regression/De-Aging, Kid Fic, Accidental Baby Acquisition, of sorts, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Sharing a Bed, yunmeng bros reconciliation, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Pining, 50 percent angst and 50 percent domestic fluff, read end notes for warnings, Post-Canon)

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3. Hi hi! Im trying to find this one fic its alternate - canon divergence, where Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing get married / together and thanks to that the remnants are safe, the stygian amulet is made into a bracelet I thinnnk, and the whole story Jin Guanshan and JGY are trying to use sect politics to get it from then, at almost the end someone tries to drown Wei Wuxian at Lotus pier, and there’s a confrontation with JGY, Xue Yang and WangXian / Jiang/Wens where everything is revealed? Thank you!!! @memeismemeismeme

was the person who tried to drown wwx Jin Zixun, and did wwx somehow access LWJ’s core from afar?

FOUND! Hope Dangling by a String by KouriArashi (M, 70k, wangxian, canon divergence, fix-it, everyone lives, angst w happy ending, hurt/comfort, psychic bond, telepathy, communication, emotional/psychological abuse, jiang family feels, lan family feels, canon-typical violence, canon-typical politics, improper use of sacred forehead ribbons, gratuitous hair washing) Isn't #3 "hope dangling from a string"? The drawing/core accessing is in chapter 11

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4. Hi!!! I've read this before, I just stopped reading it because it's still WIP.

What I remember is that it's like a Time Travel fix-it story?? But instead of Wei Wuxian, it's Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng that got sent back and tries to make everything right ??

THANK YOU IN ADVANCE!!!! @gideonmorningstar

FOUND? ❤️ For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by sami (E, 65k, WangXian, Time Travel, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Yunmeng Shuangjie, Canon Divergence, Asexual JC, First Time, Getting Together, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ)

FOUND? A Matter of Time by mrcformoso (E, 44k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, POV LWJ, POV JC, Dark LWJ, Manipulation, Grooming, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Consensual Underage Sex, Except problematic please read warning in first chapter, Blood and Violence, Insane LWJ, Manic LWJ, Conditioning, WWX is a Lán, Minor Character Death, Confused JC, Golden Core Reveal, Good Friend NHS, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiāngs, Abusive Jiāng Family, Jiāng Family Bashing, Jiāng Family Critical, POV NHS, Dark NHS, Anal Sex, Marathon Sex, Dual Cultivation, Qīnghéng-jūn Lives, LWJ Has a Big Dick, WWX Self-Lubricates, Plot Twists, Porn With Plot, Scheming NHS, Manipulative NHS, BAMF LWJ, BAMF WWX)

FOUND? Brother-In-Law's by Loveable_Psychopath (M, 324k, WIP, XuanLi, WangXian, Memories, Butterfly Effect, Sexual assualt, Self Harm / Self Doubt, Canon Divergence, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rape Recovery, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, PTSD, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Warning: JGS, Emotional Manipulation, Time Travel Fix-It, Second Chances)

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5. Hey so I can't find this one fic

Wei ying is a hitch hiker and he ends up going with lan wangji who's on his own roadtrip when he meets him at a gas station and in the end we find the reason why he's hitch hiking and on the run @yilingpatriarchsimp

FOUND? vintage youth by sami (E, 13k, WangXian, Modern AU, references to past LWJ/others, references to past WWX/WQ, Family, Sexual Tension, set in the early 90s, Background Xicheng) I think #5 is vintage youth by sami, this is how wangxian run into each other at the beginning.

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6. Help please? I think it was on tumblr here. Modern day fic where Madam Lan is alive and LZ and WY get together as teens but the Jiang's kick WY out and he comes to live with the Lans who all love and adore him. Later on LX brings Meng Yao, who he is dating, to met the family. Meng Yao doesn't get a warm reception and gets jealous of how the Lans treat WY. LX then explains WY history with the Lan family which Meng Yao tries to use against WY. The family then gets mad at LX for telling. Thanks! @isis-moon

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7. hi hi hope you're doing well hehe

was wondering if someone knows about this fic where wwx gets kidnapped and lwj uses chenqing to find him

thank you!!

FOUND? something wild calls you home by Fleetling (T, 8k, WangXian, Kidnapping, nhs is only there briefly, resentful energy, the fic where lwj plays chenqing, Rescue, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Light Angst, Happy Ending)

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8. Hi, for the fic finder, hope you guys can help me. I am looking for i fic a saw i while a go it was an arranged marriage, female Wei Ying, where the Lans are like tea merchants (?) i think, and Lan Zhan was being pressure to get married and he ends up choosing Wei Ying to marry because she was ''unkidnappable''. The Nie brothers are also in the stories as sisters. The fic had about 8 to 10 chapters, i cant find again and i think i had seen it in a post here but im not sure, pls help @omgnuttytale

FOUND! a harmony between qin and se by Alaceron (E, 62k, WangXian, Gender Changes, Historical, Female WWX)

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9. I lost this fic ages ago and have no clue how to find it: WWX and JC have just gotten to gusu for lectures and plan for WWX to ask the LAN for sanctuary to get away from Madam Yu. I remember in a chapter WWX explains to LXC why he's asking for sanctuary and shows the whip marks on his back and is rushed to the healers.

Even if no one finds it thanks for the work you out into this blog, it's a Delight 💜🖤💜🖤💜🖤💜

FOUND! Sanctuary by lindgrsl77 (Not Rated, 13k, WIP, WangXian, Abuse, not graphic, Protective Siblings, LXC is a big brother to all, Hurt/Comfort)

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10. hello im in search of a fic but i cant recall the plot im so sorry 😞 i only remember that the fic uses the chinese names of the locations in mdzs (buye tian, luanzung gang etc), not the english translations. it's possibly a canon divergence fic or a time travel one. im sorry if i can't provide more data but i would appreciate any help thank you

FOUND! Restoration by ritualist (M, 84k, WangXian, Fairy Tale Elements, Non-Linear Narrative, Time Skips, Time Shenanigans, YLLZ WWX, Sentient Burial Mounds, Sunshot Campaign, Politics, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, JGS Is His Own Content Warning, Necromancy, Surgery, Identity Issues, Masks, Yílíng Wèi Sect, Love at First Sight, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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11. Looking for two fics:

A) The one where wwx explodes a wen’s head because they were going to kill lwj. I remember wwx being injured in this fic and constantly in bed save for sitting at the table working on wards and talismans. He made talismans for lwj to use while he was away fighting. I remember jzx helping wwx change his bandages and helping him to the battle field because he couldn’t walk well. On the battle field wwx sees lwj about to be killed by a wen and makes the wen’s head explode. I think lwj in that scene chose his last view to be the sky instead of his killer’s face but he instead got covered in blood and brain matter. All this takes place in cloud recesses btw.

B) The one where wwx is immortal (i think) and lwj lives in the burial mounds with him and the wen remnants. I’m not sure how they get to this point but they travel to Qinghe to ask for his help with something I think but wwx ends up sending nmj is dying and helps him too. I remember more or less the conversation when wwx met nmj went like “huh this is a bit awkward. Sorry to ask but you DO know you’re dying right?” And nmj responds something like “yes, I’m aware.”

Thanks for your time and help! 💜 @jikcf

11A)

FOUND? 🧡 To have and to hold by Moominmammashandbag (M, 78k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Major character injury, CQL verse, Happy Ending)

11B)

FOUND? 💖 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Arranged Marriage, political scheming, Gratuitous Domesticity, Pining, slow burn, The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known, bottom LWJ)

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12. Hi! Please help me find these two series A) This one is of Jin Zixuan seeing Wei Wuxian kind of sickly and deciding tot ake care of him, int he series is different AU's but it's more of Jin Zixuan being a little stabby. Um in one of the fics of the series it was revealed that Jin Zixun is an ahh because Jin Guangshit decided to groom him and you know. B) This one is more mature because it's of wangxian teaching xicheng how to spice up their sex life by teaching them foreplay and so on

Um Hi again. I'm asking for two again one series and one also series but I'm more looking for the first book. C) So wei wuxian accidentally pulls off lan wangji's ribbon and the two get married, in the 2nd fic of the series it's of wei wuxian saying he wants a divorce but just lists more stuff of them being a cute couple D) This fic is of wangxian during cloud recesses era and wei wuxian is trans ftm. I believe it might have time travelling that's all I remember sorry

E) Hi again for the third time, instead of two books I'm asking for one. This is modern au and college au. Wangxian are roommates and I believe both of them or just Lan Wangji is/are a musician but Lan Wangji is deaf. and Nie Huaisang is kind of protective of Lan Wangji but yeah @thatperson0-0

12A)

FOUND? Coping Techniques for the Clueless and Socially Disadvantaged by meyari (G, 2k, Pre-Relationship, background wangxian, Slice of Life, slice of war, PTSD, Canon Compliant, Sunshot Campaign) One of my favorites.

12C)

FOUND? A Ribbon Beats a Red String of Fate (Restricted) Series by Titans_R_Us (T, 16k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Fluff and Crack, supportive families, Mutual Pining, Temporary Separation)

12D)

FOUND? 💖 It is a serious thing just to be alive by Itgoeson (E, 57k, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-It of Sorts, Established Relationship, Trans Male Character, Happy Ending, transphobia does not exist because i simply Do Not Vibe with it, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grinding, mentions of dysphoria, War, Canon-Typical Violence, Sunshot Campaign) the first fic in the Invitation ‘Verse series

12E)

FOUND? Comfortable Silence by WritersBlock823 (rdlaserna) (E, 65k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Mutual Pining, Deaf!musician LWJ, College/University, Musician WWX, Rimming, Anal Sex, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, Oral Sex, Dry Humping, minor breath play, Anal Fingering, Accidental Semi-public Exhibitionism, Bottom LWJ/Top WWX, Fluff, Deep Throating, Sexual Harassment, Minor Violence, Blood and Violence, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending)

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13. Hi, can you pls help me find a pic,

It's Modern au, lan zhan got into an accident and lost his memories. The fic also have moon river song as wangji's favourite song hus mother used to sing. It was full of insecurities and wangji wondering if he's a good enough partner and all.

I basically remember the whole fic but forgot the name and can't seem to find it.

Thank you for the help @vantae0417

In the fic wei ying was not a musician but was married to lan zhan already and they were living together and basically wei ying was being a brat and asked wangji to buy him chocolate milk and wangji got into an accident while getting it, when wangji woke up he had forgotten wei ying and about their relationship, so when he found out he he got a husband now get got all insecure because we'll wei ying was acting nervous and almost crying because he felt guilty for accident but wangji thought that he was a abusive husband and that is marriage was not a good one and all

After they went home and some wei ying cried and told him about his guilt wangji asked him if he's not a good husband and wei ying comforted wangji.

They were both probably teachers in this fic and were about to adopt yuan

is Wei ying a music store owner and was Lan zhan involved with crime?

NOT FOUND! Across the street to another life by danegen (M, 99k, WangXian, Modern AU, unleashed au Family Fluff, Set in America, Hurt/Comfort, Past Child Abuse, Addiction, Crime, Amnesia, Ableist, Language, another fridged mother, POV Alternating, past wwx/ofc, past wwx/omc, Medium parent YZY, A-Yuan is wwx's biological son, Musicians, Happy Ending)

FOUND! remind me why I love you by AG1234VL (M, 44k, WangXian, Minor XiCheng, Past XiYao, Modern AU, Temporary Amnesia, Light Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, sort-of crack treated seriously, WangXian Pining, Except They're Already Married, Hair Brushing, Childhood Trauma, Past Abuse L, Fluff and Angst, Crying WWX, Jealous LWJ, Forehead Kisses, Family Feels, Bottom!LWJ, versatile!wangxian, smitten!lwj, flirty!wwx, horny!wangxian, Mental Illness, Non-main Character Suicide, Non-Sexual Intimacy, but also sexual intimacy, brief discussions about grief)

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14. Hello, me again! 😆 I'm looking for another wangxian fic that I would like to re-read. What I remember is: Jiang Cheng kills Lan Zhan in some sort of time travel ritual (?). Jiang Cheng then goes back to the past, but the ritual has erased Lan Wangji from existence. Even so, in this new timeline both Lan Xichen & Wei Ying feel that something/someone is missing. JC eventually reverses the ritual, LZ comes back, and LX & WY are NOT happy with the revelations. Please help me find it! 😢 @dreammaiden21

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15. I lost a fic! It is pre-WangXian and is told from, I think, alternate POV of LXC and JC (it is not XiCheng, that I remember, it's just from their perspectives). It's post Sunshot and Jiang Cheng uses an old treaty with the Lan that was some kind of "in the future" betrothal agreement in order to open negotiations for trade, using WWX as the bait. What I remember is that he was not expecting the Lan to take it seriously, but LWJ VERY MUCH DID. Help? @kimboo-york

FOUND! Alas, Disasterous Miscalculations Align Sects with Sudden Summer Weddings by mondengel (G, 3k, WangXian, Humor, Arranged Marriage)

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16. Hello!! I've been trying to find a fic where Lwj doesn't know that the elders told Lsz to stop calling him a-die, and just assumed it was Lsz's choice. It hurt him, but he didn't complain because he wanted it to be Lsz's choice. When Wwx comes back and Lsz is really close with him and starts calling him baba, Lwj starts thinking that Lsz stopped seeing him as a father back then because he was such an awful father that even someone who didn't get to raise him (Wwx) still managed to be a better father in the little time he had. I remember he feels guilty for feeling jealous of the close relationship Wwx and Lsz have. He gets depressed about it, and Wwx notices. He questions Lwj and Lwj confesses everythingto him. Wwx goes to inquire Lsz about why he treats Lwj so impersonally and formally. I think Lz has a panic attack at some point.

SIMILAR! The seasons change (but I love you the same) by kdkdkd (G, 7k, WangXian, Single Father LWJ, Thirteen Years, Fatherhood, Growing Up, Fluff, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grief, Insecurity, Love, Canon Compliant, headcanons, Music Hall, Single Parent LWJ, Dad LWJ, Badass LWJ, Annoying Lan Elders get put in their place and fired, Thirteen Years of WWX's Death) is very similar but set when Lan Yuan is still a child

FOUND? Silver & Gold by beeswaxing (E, 198k, wangxian, JL/LSZ, LJY/OYZZ, Post-Canon, Canon Divergence, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Age Regression/De-Aging, Fix-It of Sorts, Family Bonding, Established Relationship, Cuddling & Snuggling, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Literal Sleeping Together, Romance, BAMF WWX, Mutual Pining, Horny Teenagers, Underage Kissing, Protective WWX, Fluff) could be Silver and Gold by Beeswaxing, chapter 13, scene below the delicious pic of WWX. WWX is questioning LSZ about what he calls LWJ and why.

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17. I'm going crazy looking for a fic I read where the Wen remnants send wwx and a-yuan away to Qinghe to look for help destroying the yin amulet, and somewhere along the line: wwx finds out the wens intended for them not to come back via a letter wq left, nmj and wwx exchange secrets(golden core + nie sabers), and I believe it ends with them giving the current nie ancestors the amulet to fight for eternity, instead of spirits and corpses. I am in your debt if you can find it &lt;;3 @tupperwareofoddities

FOUND! The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence)

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18. Hi! A friend recommended me a fic and neither of us can find it anywhere. I really want to read it and am hoping you or your followers can help.

it's jiang cheng-centric, set largely at lotus pier, he does embroidery (and it *is* complete, so it's not The Fic You Can Find By Searching For Embroidery), definitely post-sunshot and i think probably post-canon, and he *might* have been like cursed or something

Thank you for all the work you do! @cadencekismet

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19. Hi (＾▽＾) for the fic finder I have been looking for one set after the SSC, LQR is humming? whistling? a lan song at WWX that reveal that WWX is possets? and he then quickly beg LQR for help before the thing posessing? him take control again. hope you have a great day/night! thanks a lot! you are amazing people ♡

FOUND! A Kiss to Break a Curse (or rather, Possession.) by Silver_Flame_2724 (T, 1k, WangXian, Demonic Possession, Lán Music, Magical Kisses, Love Confessions, Sort of?, more like, Marriage Proposal, Alchemy, Pills, Fluff)

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20. Hello, I'm wondering if you know or might be able to help find a fic. It's a modern au, WQ and WN inherit a run-down house, and WWX is ride or die for them, of course, only to be surprised when both LWJ and JC are equally willing to put their lives on hold to support. JYL and JZX are together and the only reason she doesn't go with is that she's heavily pregnant. Also inc. Madam Yu not telling the boys that JYL had gone into labour as it was 'their fault for leaving in the first place'. Thank you in advance for any help! @katonahottinroof

are they fixing up the run down house?

NOT FOUND! Once Upon a Place by zeldasayre (E, 80k, WangXian, House restoration, Falling In Love, Misunderstandings, Enemies to Lovers, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Bisexual WWX, Trans Male WWX, Gay LWJ, JYL & LWJ Friendship, Modern AU, Set somewhere in America, Tattoo Artist WWX, Librarian LWJ, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Domestic) is the one I'm thinking abt

FOUND! the ship sways but the heart is steady by taizi (T, 9k, WangXian, ChengQing, Modern AU, Established Relationship, Families of Choice, Adopted Sibling Relationship, Past Child Abuse, Protective JC, Soft WangXian)

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[jemmo]

i cant even begin to explain how interesting i found this ep, but i think it all centres on night saying that day was a crybaby as a child, and yet in this ep he’s the one we see cry the least. and while i dont want to diminish how insanely difficult it is for day to lose his sight completely, i mean, we all saw the end of last weeks ep, i find it so interesting that it was the other people in his family that struggled with it the most, in their own ways. it makes me think about how for day, this is something he’s known is coming, and it’s only he who knows how his sight is deteriorating, so it’s not a shock, and while it’s upsetting for mohk, day confides in him enough that he knew it was coming to, and they had that cathartic moment together. but for his mom and for night, they didn’t see it coming, which is why it’s completely understandable that she panics. it might not seem like panic on the surface bc she’s a very put together woman, but the need to protect day and keep him away from any possible harm and do it herself, it tells us that she’s panicking, both bc this change they thought they could beat by getting a transplant before it got this bad, but also bc it brings to the surface that for all this time, the last months of day having some sight, she’s been absent and swamped with work and hasn’t been there with day, taking care of him, doing things with him, enriching that time, and the guilt makes her double down, at the expense of day. and it’s nothing anyone but herself can deal with, address that feeling and know that maybe she could’ve done different, done better, but ultimately that time has passed and change can only be made now, in the present.

and for night, wow. i wanna commend mark so much bc for me, he managed to capture that sense of a child in an adults body so well, bc this ep was about him healing that child inside of him that felt second best and not cared for like his brother was. and it says a lot that he cried more when his mother made his favourite dish after so many years than he did when day forgave him, bc for the whole show we think that the heaviness he is carrying is the guilt of the accident, but it’s only in the past few eps we really know what the root of it all is. and that’s not to say that day forgives him lightly, he absolutely doesn’t, it says more about how he actually has been keeping count of all that night has been doing to make it up to him, from taking him to go with mohk on the trip to bringing him a phone, night has constantly been trying to show that he does care, and none of it feels insincere, like just trying to get rid of a guilty conscience, he actually wants to be the big brother he wasn’t before. and when he cries at his favourite meal, it feels cathartic not just for all the obvious reasons of feeling loved and included, but for night that’s been doing all this stuff to show day he cares, finally someone is doing that for him, and it’s like he finally knows what that feels like on both sides, for someone to care enough to do something like that for you, and to receive that act of love. finally, it feels like all that care he was showing other people is being returned to him, and it’s not out of courtesy, it’s bc they care for him just as much as he cares for them.

[inadvisablebutinevitable]

hellooo how would you rank the aftg characters personally? like in order of favorite to least favorite?

bestie I actually wrote a whole thesis essay response before realizing how unhinged it is so here is the abridged version: (note this is all for the canon versions of these characters, fanon ratings would probably be different)

Neil Josten

David Wymack

Nicky Hemmick (I know I know but it will take me 1000000 years to explain all my Nicky thoughts)

Kevin Day

Matt Boyd

Andrew Minyard (WHY IS HE THIS LOW?? Guys I don’t know I do love him I promise I would do anything for him)

Allison Reynolds

Jean Moreau (once again should be higher I love him I do)

Danielle Wilds (her and Allison could also swap places and I’d still be like “yeah that’s right” bc I love them both)

Catalina Alvarez (my fave tsc character besides Jean she means everything to me you don’t understand)

Jeremy Knox (I love him I do I just know nothing abt him)

Renee Walker (it physically hurts me to put her this low I love her so much I would die for her)

Laila Dermott

Aaron Minyard (don’t come at me pls I like him and I love fanon Aaron I just wasn’t Aaron’s number one fan in canon but I still have so much love and respect for him I swear)

Seth Gordon

I don’t really hate any of these characters I swear (except Riko he’s ranked so low he didn’t deserve a spot on the list) ((he’s a compelling villain tho)) (((Tetsuji is ranked like -100000000 I will never forgive Tetsuji ever)))

if you really want my never ending thoughts here they are under the cut:

warning for a long ass post I’m so sorry because sometimes even I can’t focus enough to read my own long posts

I have spent so long staring at this ask and trying to figure out how I can pit my children against each other but here is my best try: (this is in order of how much I enjoyed their characters personally when I was reading. The list would prob be different if I was ranking them as people and not as characters):

Neil Josten. It’s always gonna be Neil I’m sorry. Recency bias means that I’m currently thinking (and posting) abt Jean 24/7 but Neil Josten will always take the cake for me in ways I can’t even articulate. His dry humour and narrative choices always have me in stitches. He’s got so much trauma but he doesn’t want to do anything about it but push it down until he meets people he cares about and they found family him into actually healing. He cares so deeply and loves in such a subtle but incredibly strong way. I don’t know how to even express this without saying that the reason I can’t put aftg down every time I pick it up is because of Neil. He tells the story in a way that makes me want to know everything about literally every scene. It’s all Nora ofc but the personality between the lines is how I define “Neil” and I will never not love it. You’ve got me going and now I’m not gonna stop. I can’t even apologize for the length bc I will never apologize for yapping about Neil Josten I say that shit with my FULL CHEST

David Wymack. Do I even have to explain myself here? Those are his fucking KIDS and he would do ANYTHING for them while being a SASSY LITTLE SHIT about it the whole time plus he’s a DILF I would kill and die for him.

Nicky Hemmick don't shoot me pls LOOK do I think what he did to Neil in Edens was at all ok? Absolutely not. When I first read tfc I was HARDCORE hating on Nicky and then trk and tkm made him one of my favourite characters. I don’t think he’s perfect but I love the way he loves. It isn’t hard for him, none of the monsters had to prove themselves to Nicky, or even try to be a decent friend for Nicky to automatically decide that these were his people and that he cares about them. When we meet him Aaron is a homophobic dick to him and Andrew literally pulls a knife on him and yet we immediately find out that he willingly dropped everything and moved an ocean away from his home and his boyfriend to raise them both in the US and not ONCE does he act like he seriously regrets it. Me? I would be holding that shit over their heads every time they act disrespectful but for Nicky loving them despite the shit they put him through is not even a question. It’s not even just the twins too. That one scene where Neil asks “are we? Friends?” And Nicky is SO SHOCKED that Neil didn’t know and goes “oh kiddo of course!!” is my Roman Empire. Plus he’s hilarious obviously.

Kevin Day guys I love him ok, the first two books he compelled me but TKM he POPPED OFF. “I’ve never been skiiing” BANGER “I’m gonna be the deadliest piece on the board” GOOSEBUMPS, “My father comes to all my games” HAD ME IN TEARS. Don’t even get me STARTED on that sexy ass racquet hand switch at championships I’m going to combust. I love that he’s literally obsessed with exy and has the most complicated relationships with the mc’s of every book and yet steals the show every time. Kevin Day I love you.

Matt Boyd. I love him because he would love me for putting Neil first and kill me for not putting Dan before him. He loves his girlfriend and his homies and his sport and cars in that order. He’s a golden retriever who saw a team full of scary-ass wolves and still tries to be friends with them. He wasn’t a part of the “clique” that Neil was in but he did not let that affect his perception or love for Neil in any way. He’s been to hell and came out with just as much love in his heart as he did when he came in. He told Neil that he didn’t know if Andrew would be good for him but then he saw that Andrew fought Kevin for him and decided that he approved bc all that mattered to him was that Neil had someone who would defend him the way Matt would. Then he immediately becomes the #1 wingman right before the shower scene bc he would rather die than cockblock his homie. I love him so much

Andrew Minyard. Like Nicky, I was absolutely a HATER in book one and then he became one of my faves. I like that he’s brave and determined, standing despite everything when the world tried to put him down, but not without his flaws. I really appreciate that Andrew isn’t perfect, he struggles, he’s violent when it’s necessary and sometimes when it’s not. I love how he was always willing to protect Neil, despite everything in him telling him that Neil couldn’t be trusted. He’s a flawed man, but at his core, a good one.

Allison Reynolds is that girl. She reminds me of Andrew (both of them would kill me for saying that) because she takes no shit and gives no fucks. She’s who 16 year old me wanted to be when I grew up. She goes through every emotion in these books and comes out full of righteous anger and uses that to kick the raven’s ASSES and I’m so here for that

Jean Moreau. It’s weird to me that he’s so low because I love him he’s my special boy. I thought that he was interesting in TRK but Riko was a more compelling villain to me. Then ofc we learn that he was never meant to be the villain and he was ranked just below Kevin for me because I just wanted him to be happy. Then tsc happened and he became my hyper fixation. He has a VERY similar sense of humor as Neil except for Neil his jokes were directed at abnormal behaviour, and for Jean he just gets so appalled at the most normal things. I digress about his humor I love Jean and if u want to know why just read literally any of my posts

Danielle Wilds is my GIRL. Her story compels me so much and I really wish we got more backstory for her (obvs we got plenty considering the cast of characters is so huge but still… I want more). She loves her team so much despite everything and she works so hard to keep them together I wanna give her a hug and a kiss. (That scene in TKM right after Andrew breaks Riko’s arm Dan was the FIRST one to find Neil and she was so concerned about him she cares about him so much STOP they’re FAMILY I LOVE THEM)

Catalina Alvarez was my favourite character in tsc (aside from Jean) because I love her so much. @theresalwaysafiresomewhere said that cat reminds her of me and it was still to this day the best compliment I’ve ever received. I cannot name a single thing abt cat I don’t like so I’m just gonna keep going.

Jeremy Knox is only this low bc I still know nothing about this man. Reading his pov and seeing him thru Jean’s eyes was helpful in securing him a spot in my list of faves tho, I want to know everything about him please Nora please

Renee Walker also should not be this low it physically hurts me to put her here but like most other characters in this half of the list, she didn’t compel me as much until tkm. Just a personal thing I guess. I do love her though and I wish she got more time with Jean. It still bothers me that she loved Jean but was the bigger person about it and knew that they weren’t at the right place in their lives, and yet we don’t get to see how making this decision affects her. I think she deserves to be loved more. I hope she gets a happy ending the same way Jean does.

Laila Dermott I love her I just don’t really know enough abt her

Aaron Minyard I like him I promise I do he’s got some of the best one-liners! He killed drake did all that in college with an gf and all the power to him but really I think that fanon aaron just appealed to me way more. Canon Aaron just annoyed me because— gunshots actually you know what maybe it’s once again because unreliable narrator Neil hated him and Neil’s my fave so I had to be a hater too 😔

Seth. I know some fans love him and I respect that but I just… idk I don’t see the appeal. Fanon Seth is great tho I’m a fan.

Canon Thea is somewhere on this list near Laila again bc I love her but I don’t know enough about her to be like “yeah she’s my fave”. The version of Thea I created in my head based on the crumbs the books and the ec gave us, on the other hand… she’d probably be somewhere up there with Kevin

[withered--s0uls]

Chat...

Cyn,,,

rambling ab how I see DAS!Cyn in the lyrics

"in the city of the dead

i lay stuck inside my bed

the house burns down around me

the language of the lost

pouring from their open mouths

nobody can hear a thing

suddenly i’m breathing in the smoke

surrounded by the bodies

as i’m tugging on my chains

i’ll be swallowed by the flames

freedom dripping from the sink"

⬆️ The Solver taking over her mind and body slowly

"i don’t need forgiveness

i just wanna talk and for you to listen

i know i’d only raise the suspicion of my cause

my burns they throb to the beat of your heart"

&

"temperament or sickness?

holler all you want, no one ever listens

if only i had raised my suspicion of the cause

would you have noticed it at all?"

⬆️ Her relationship with DAS!V, she knows V is suspicious of her as is. Cyn blames herself for what happens and doesn't think she deserves to be forgiven. She just wants V & co to understand where the line between her and the Solver falls

"am i a robot or a doll?

am i anything at all?

maybe a soul like me

doesn’t even need to know

am i big or am i small?

hunching over standing tall?

i lost my identity

oh so very long ago"

&

"as i woke up from the dream

i had lost all self esteem

the burning home had cowed me

i thought that i was safe

now i’ll never be the same

tossed aside for making a scene

do i know who i pretend to be?

of whom am i a copy?

yes it made me who i am

but i’ll never understand

why it had to happen to me"

⬆️ Cyn honestly doesn't know who she is anymore, or who she's expected to be. I wont go into her backstory pre manor too much bc ✨spoilers✨ BUT pretty much from the day she booted up people expected her to be a specific way. It didn't end well and then her second chance was ruined by the Solver, who corrupted so much of her that people see them as the same person. That whole trauma also shaped her, she's different than how she used to be.

"software update, reinstall

scary things i can’t recall

making the best of it"

&

"ones and zeros

true or false?

reset system to default

faking the rest of it, but i can’t remember why"

⬆️ PTSD flashbacks and her desperately trying to erase that part of her.

"never even knowing why

on my knees i try to crawl

fire breaking in the walls / fire charred collapsing walls

calling out for somebody

knowing i’ll get no reply"

⬆️ NOT regular DAS -- BUT Trapped/Hivemind Cyn which means also Trapped Dormancy Cyn... calling out to N in the void of her mind...

"not robot nor a doll

i’m not anything at all

i’m just and entity finding out the way to go

but these fingers and these palms, full of love despite the scars

they show indisputably

i have so much more to grow

oh, i can change i can evolve

i can get up when i fall

i’ll live contentedly

i don’t need a reason why standing tall and standing strong

i have found where I belong in the arms of somebody

there is no more need to cry"

⬆️ Healing under the care of her family :)

[lesbianbanana]

Let's talk abt Percy and Nico.

Percy gets a lot of hate for Nico - how he "unfairly villainized him", how he let him run away, how he did a lot of things.

But let's not forget, Percy was a traumatised teenager. Percy, amidst other things, watched a 12 year old sacrifice her life. A 12 year old with a day and a half of training and whom he'd sworn to protect. A 12 year old whose body they never found and who probably didn't even get a funeral or a burial shroud.

Percy was the one who had to tell her ten year old brother that she was dead, with only a figurine to offer the boy. One who'd he promised he'd try to protect his sister. One who had literally nothing and no one else. He watched Nico run away, and believed it was his fault. He didn't follow, not because he didn't want to, but because Nico had stopped him from doing so long enough to disappear. Percy still searched the woods, full of monsters, for this kid for hours before admitting defeat. And he looked everywhere else for Nico for months afterwards.

Percy did not villainize Nico. He did not assume Nico hated him and wanted him dead for no reason. Nico told Percy himself that he hated him, and Percy believed he deserved it. He assumed Nico wanted him dead because Percy truly believed that for allowing Bianca to die, he deserved death. Percy validated Nico hatred for him because Percy himself hated himself so much bc of the incident.

In the demigod files, there's a short story where Percy, Nico, and Thalia meet Melinoe (at least I'm pretty sure it's her). Percy is shown to have come to terms with the deaths of his friends, but I just don't think that's true. Maybe Bianca's ghost forgiving him helped him come to terms with her death and move on, but he certainly hadn't before that.

And when Nico disappears after the titan war, Percy lets him go not because he's a terrible person, but because he understood that Nico needed to find a place to call home where he could grieve and heal and find happiness, and at that time that place was not camp half-blood. Percy offered everything he had to Nico, and it was not enough. Percy was not in a position mentally to offer the comfort that Nico needed, and it was not his responsibility to, because he was a child. Percy let Nico go because he understood that when Nico was ready, he would come back if he wanted to. He couldn't force him to stay.

The next time Nico pops up for Percy - after Camp Jupiter - Nico's in danger. The argument is mainly between Jason, Leo, and Hazel, while Percy notably stays silent. I believe that this is because Nico's imminent danger has triggered a bout of memories for him. Bianca, the whole experience with Nico during BotL, etc. I honestly don't think he was all that present.

At the end of the series, when Nico confesses his crush, Percy is surprised. Percy probably still believed that Nico hated him - maybe not wanted him dead, but certainly despised him. He still believed Nico blamed him for Bianca's death, because a small part of Percy still blamed himself. He shock wasn't "I'm not good enough for you??" It was "You don't hate me?"

What happened to Nico was not Percy's fault, but Percy has a major guilt complex and blames himself for it anyway. Anyways yeah.

[ghoulsbian]

001 with Mutsaura for the ask thing?

heavy breathing

you got it!! i'm happy to answer this!! i never get to talk about them except for with my friend allan (@holyhounddog, follow him! he makes amazing art.)

HERE WE GO!! mutsaura:

- when i started shipping it: i started shipping it back when the :re chapters were still coming out, specifically when mucchan and sanny started to team up. i immediately fell in love with the pairing. it very quickly replaced mutsurie as my favorite mutsuki pairing and has remained as my number one. there's something so spicy about them that just piques my interest. toxic yaoi to healthy yaoi (in the epilogue). DELICIOUS.

- my thoughts: probably in my top five tokyo ghoul ships. not exactly sure where but yeah. they have so much going for them- size difference, mutual understanding of each other, making each other worse, going from toxic to healthy, etc. they're both really hot. they also stayed close with each other after the events of the final arc too and that makes me sooo happy. they really grew together and found wellness together.

- what makes me happy about them: i think that shinsanpei could offer mutsuki some sort of safety that no one else could. sanny is a man who accepted all of mutsuki, all of his faults and flaws and errors. he wasn't someone mutsuki had to hide even a portion of himself from. sanny accepted him at his craziest and unhealthiest, though sanchan was pretty crazy and unhealthy himself, and stayed with him as he got better too. i think they could be true soulmates. maybe they had a period of time where they thought it was only their craziness that brought them together, but they realized it was so much more than that.

- what makes me sad about them: i think that during their healing processes, there was a LOT of unraveling of the poor ways in which they treated each other during their dual insanity. it was a very emotional period of time for the both of them. i think that mutsuki also had to learn to love in a new way that wasn't pure obsession. i think he offered himself in that way to sanny but sanny downright refused, and it made mutsuki lash out cuz he felt unloved, but he came to understand shinsanpei's reasoning for doing so.

(i'm skipping over the fanfic questions bc i don't really read fanfic at all anymore, whoops)

- who i'd be comfortable with them ending up with if not each other: for mutsuki, definitely urie. though, i don't really see anyone else for sanchan. i know people ship him with touma but i feel indifferent towards that.

- my happily ever after for them: they ultimately leave anything related to ghouls and travel the world together. they end up with a cat that they carry around in one of those pet backpacks as they travel too. they end up living somewhere by the ocean, by a beach. they live a calm and unassuming life, not forgetting the people they used to be but forgiving themselves for it. they send postcards to the old quinx members and the kaneki family periodically too. AAGGHH!!

- who is the big/little spoon: i think mutsuki would feel emasculated for a bit if sanny tried to be the big spoon for him. so mutsuki was the big spoon at all times for a while. but mutsuki eventually caved, tentatively allowing sanny to be the big spoon. they agreed that if mutsuki felt too uncomfortable they would stop immediately. mutsuki was very tense at first, but slowly relaxed into shinsanpei's arms. it felt very nice for him. he'd never allowed anyone to hold him like that. he can't get enough afterwards. nowadays sanchan is the usual big spoon.

- what is their favorite non-sexual activity: bathing and showering together. mutsuki was very averse to the bathtub for a long time, because of his childhood trauma. he got extremely triggered and broke down the first time they tried the bathtub together, so they kind of worked up to it more gradually after that. it's now a fun activity they like doing a lot.

hope these are good :3

[ladysophiebeckett]

Your mind is really superior, your Cartagena head canon is on point. I always wondered why Armando looked so upset when he found out Betty had been in Cartagena during the time she disappeared. I mean I understand that he could have been surprised she was ever outside of Bogotá, but he seemed almost angry to find this out. Or maybe he remembered the time he saw her on TV but thought his mind was playing tricks on him, now he knew it was real, and he didn't deal with it so well 😂😂

he's not necessarily angry, but he is a mixture of shocked and hurt (even tho he has no right to be) as u can see here:

so shocked by the revelation that he had to take his glasses off. the thing is, he went crazy looking for her, wondering where she could be and to find out that she never even left colombia. she was like, an hour plane ride away the entire time. and he didn't know. and no one would tell him bc she left orders to specifically not tell him. so for him, cartagena is always going to be the place she went to to get away from him. even tho for her, its the place where she healed and learned to forgive him.

i dont even think he remembers seeing her on tv. he doesn't have the full knowledge of how she ended up in cartagena bc when he mentions it to mario, mario says 'oh so she left for cartagena out of spite?'--(rough translation)--and armando nods. which we know isn't completely true. yes, we know she was also planning on leaving ecomoda but she never had a location getaway planned. like armando said, she left all the money and her family is poor. for armando, finding out where she had been this whole time is simply painful for him.

[pain-is-too-tired]

asking shit again bc im bored and i love reading your ideas <3

would really love to know more about your ideas or hcs for borrowers au? no pressure, but im kinda hooked on the idea lol

Can't remember all I've already rambled about so forgive me if I repeat stuff but-

Kronos and Minos have very different ways on how they handle borrowers but they are very similar in ways as well.

Minos of course likes to experiment on them. Test their endurance, resolve, etc. Idk if any of y'all watched Muppets From Space, but imagine that lab scene with Rizzo. Pretty much what Chris is dealing with but worse.

Kronos just likes to mess/toy with any borrowers he captures. Having Luke trust him to stay in the complex he owns is really him playing the long game really. Though he isn't as interested in just messing with Luke as he seems to have more of a odd fondness for him. More so like a pet more than anything tho.

Both also are not like by the ones living in the complex.

Which is just typical landlord and tenant relationship tbh hdgdf

But Kronos is pretty cruel to his tenants, is a way that he's probably treat them like he does borrowers of he could. The oldest of the tenants become ultra protective of the younger due to this.

When Luke tells Lee about him trusting Kronos means well or whatever, Lee immediately is like-

"It took him a week to get mold from out of the vents. Dude you are not safe with that man."

Thing is, Luke does slowly peice together that Kronos (and Minos) isn't good. But he's much too scared to do anything about it, he has a bad habit of thinking mainly for himself at times. He's far to scared of getting killed or worse so it's easy him just to stay in Kronos good side.

That, and Kronos tends to boost his ego. Makes it hard for him to think about how much the others around him are suffering.

The other borrowers, however, are not as willing to just take it.

Charles becomes ultra protective of those around him. Especially as one of their previous homes had been Gaea's, who had hurt and nearly killed Leo and Hazel.

Bianca is just as protective; given, again, Hazel had been hurt before. Causing her to be super protective of her younger siblings.

Also, struggle to decide which Percy and Annabeth would be for a bit, but I've decided have Percy as a Borrower and Annabeth as another tenant in collage.

Percy is also very protective in typical Percy fashion. Not just for his little cousins(Bianca, Nico and Hazel) but his little brother Tyson.

When Chris first goes missing, Percy's one the first to go looking for him, which leads him to getting caught by Annabeth. If course their first run in is tense but Percy slowly starts warming to Annabeth who's also still unsure what to make of him.

He also ends up being found by Lee after an argument with Luke leads him to get hurt by a snake they stumble on. Lee helps heals him and also precedes to chew out Luke next time he sees him.

Also. Borrowers 100% purr in my head. After being found and in healing, Chris is in a comatose state for awhile. Clarisse, Silena and Charles are all worried of course. But one day why they're checking in on Chris he just starts purring.

Silena and Clarisse are taken aback at first, but Charles is immediately ecstatic. Purring is a good sign he's getting better!

Had to draw it of course-