#bc of all the negative connotations

[spookykestrel]

I've been awake for an hour and I've already slipped and fallen on the ice and am having an unrelated meltdown in the bathroom at work

[rabble-dabble]

i am not broken, there is nothing fix. im not difficult; im worth loving. im not a manipulator; im just a scared, angry, sensitive person. im not broken; i have childhood ptsd. im not hysterical, i was reacting to something terribly traumatic. There is nothing wrong with me; there was never anything wrong with me. i was a child. i was a child. i was a child. i was a child. i was a child. it didnt break me and it didnt make me stronger. it was just abuse

[postsforphil]

submitting mysteries by the yeah yeah yeahs for phil (seems like his alt rock vibe)

there's something about this song that i think 18-22y/o phil particularly would really enjoy. just the certain pettiness that comes with that age ig, but also the energy of "i can't imagine not coming back to you but also idk who i hate more me or you" is so,,, it's fitting, is what i'll say. i like this submission

[angy-grrr]

There is gonna be more than that coming from the poll, but whatever it is vote Kacchan/Deku for best hero. Idc who wins i just need them to be together again

if they just announced it today without saying anything before, I would probably immediately do it.

Right now im just bitter because of the hype -I thought it would at least slightly relate to the actual story (adaptations of other stories, extra content for the volume which once again may I remind everyone is extremely short, almost half what a manga volume usually looks which is a huge problem).

This disappointed me extremely, as its not even related to any content from the manga beyond the characters it uses. I get that many ppl will work on this, and that artist will get excited over being able to get the spotlight, some will be able to ask specific questions, and a character will get a statue and a movie.

Still extremely disappointed because of the "special project will be announced on the 5th *wink wink*".

I can't feel excitement over it as, in my mind, I lost something that felt better -more content related to the story. So at best this would be "oh cool I can try it", a feeling pretty similar to the other announcements -not my favorite thing in the world, but I wont reject it and try to see what comes out of it.

This isnt at best to me right now

[nexus-nebulae]

oh i cannot wait for the amount of times we're gonna hear new introjects wandering headspace and just going "is that knuckles the echidna." this is hilarious

[bibleofficial]

legal weed comparisons netherlands to us:

- purchase limit (day): 5g vs 1oz

- available to purchase: bud/hash, brownies vs … name a noun ? 😭😭

- percentages: <25% vs >25%

- price 35€/3.5, 15€ fatty prerolls vs just buy it illegally so u don’t have to pay taxes on the same product 😭😭

overall i mean it runs standard to black market broadly for eu it’s just … legal-ish

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[luv-again]

we are not talking abt the fact I'm using shadamytober as writing practice for amy's pov in SLI no we are not

[reblog-house]

iNSaNiTY did SO much for the weirdgirl community in the early twenty tens.

((me, I am the weirdgirl community, in this instance))

[radio-4-is-static]

KATATOKI Teaser | Yojiro Noda x J.I.D Listen to WONDER BOY'S AKUMU CLUB here !!

[autismmusings]

the only stuffed animals that I have ever named were my childhood bear... named bear, my bunny named bunny, my pink pillow named pinky, and my pink bear named pink bear.

[idontmindifuforgetme]

The dialogue around media consumption is so interesting to me bc I have never truly considered things like reading a good book, listening to a good album, reading poetry etc etc media consumption. Not in the sense that you’re not taking in media w these activities, but more so that the words “media consumption” have always held negative connotations to me. There’s an implication that the way you’re consuming media is mindless, or that the media (ie reading literature quotes on twitter) isn’t giving you as much as another piece of media could (ie actually reading the book the quote came from). And tbh since we are all ubiquitously addicted to our screens, I do think there should be a dialogue about media consumption & what it means in today’s terms

[creatingblackcharacters]

A quick search of your blog turned up nothing on the topic yet (though that might not mean much given how infamously bad Tumblr's search function is), but I've found myself in a weird situation: I'm in a furry server where a lot of people have OCs or Fursonas who are raccoons. They're adorable, varied in design and personality, and I love them all, but a lot of folks there have a tendency to refer to them using a... certain shortened version of "raccoon" that is still considered offensive in a lot of places and I myself feel uncomfortable with. That said, the server has lots of international users (including several Black members), and the word has only ever been used as a term of endearment or affection for our furry friends, so I'm genuinely convinced they don't even know that word is considered a slur and really do just think of it as a shortened version of raccoon and nothing more. Furthermore, I'm White myself, so I'm worried that me saying anything by myself will come across as a "White person deciding what Black people are offended by" thing. What would be the best way to try and bring up my concerns with them?

🤣🤣🤣🤣 the irony here is that some people would consider the Black people in your server that very four letter word for allowing it to happen. Because I would DEFINITELY be side eyeing folks if they were Black, specifically African American where the term originated and they should be aware of the history.

I see where you're coming from, as that word is not something that nonblack folk have the right to use, especially in accusation towards Black people. The context of the word makes it ineffective if it doesn't come from another Black person.

Really, all you can do is ask. "Hey, I've learned recently that this word has a heavy negative connotation; are our Black members in the group comfortable with us using it? Is there something we should be aware of to make sure that we're being inclusive and not accidentally using slurs?" That way the floor is open for Black users to say yay or nay. Because you might assume they don't know, but meanwhile they know very well, but want to be included so badly that they don't say anything bc "oh well, they don't mean this in a racist way".

You ALSO have to make sure that if nonblack members of the group act an ass, that you're willing to stand on it. Don't say "hey, we want you to be safe" and then allow people to punish Black users for speaking up! Otherwise you're just saying "we're all equal" and then it's just an unsafe environment where we clearly aren't equal.

[chantillyxlacey]

i've seen a lot of takes (i am using the word 'take' absolutely neutrally here; and i'm specifying neutrality bc i have started to see that word as having inherently negative connotations in this context and i have no idea if that's just a Me Problem but i figured specificity couldn't hurt)

okay, that got away from me, let me start again

i've seen a lot of takes about The Damsel that have to do with idealization being another kind of dehumanization and how she's Like She Is because you/TLQ are projecting a fantasy onto her and sanding away any traits that don't fit into that fantasy and rendering her into little more than a vessel for your/TLQ's wish fulfillment

and i don't necessarily think that's *wrong* either-- but i think that's also not the complete picture, and that only looking that that half of the image does kind of tend to paint TLQ in an unfairly bad light

because the thing is, in The Damsel's route, TLQ is ALSO being reduced to an archetype just as much as The Damsel herself is! The Princess becomes the quintessential fairytale fair-maiden-in-distress that exists only to be rescued by a knight-in-shining-armor; and TLQ-- if you allow them to be guided entirely by The Smitten-- becomes that quintessential fairytale knight-in-shining-armor that only exists to rescue the fair-maiden-in-distress

The Damsel says over and over, explicitly, that "I just want to make you happy!" and The Smitten in this route is equally preoccupied with making HER happy-- he even says it directly if you start deconstructing her. every other part of his identity has been subsumed to revolve entirely around her just as much as the reverse is true for her.

(speaking of the Deconstructed Damsel, i've also seen Smitten's reaction to that touted as him not caring about her agency-- but again, i always read that as him being unable to see any flaws in her rather than being pleased with the idea of her being biddable, specifically. if you halt the deconstruction his reaction is "she's ALWAYS been perfect" -- he'd think that no matter what she did or said, because his identity revolves around her the exact way that hers revolves around him/TLQ)

even the actions that lead to HEA fit into this, i think-- i read that moment as less The Smitten lashing out at her because she didn't live up to his fantasy-- it still happens even after she's said "i guess we can stay, if that's what you want"-- she's giving The Smitten what he wants, but he's still distressed because SHE'S not happy

i think it's more The Smitten feeling that HE hadn't lived up to HIS half of their shared fantasy. if she's not happy with the idea of "all we need is each other" then it must be because HE failed somehow. if she needs or wants more than him, it must be because HE is not enough.

if he was just better at playing his part, if he just offered her more, if he was just clearer about his devotion--

"if we just showed her the contents of our heart, she'd be happy"

that's not to say that what The Smitten does in HEA isn't incredibly toxic for both of them-- it definitely is, and it clearly makes both the Princess and TLQ miserable. "everything she doesn't know she wants" is a bad mindset to approach a relationship with, whether that mindset is reached through controlling selfishness or a desperation to appease (and i definitely think Smitten is motivated by the latter-- it's no coincidence that we arrive at HEA through a literal and fatal act of self mutilation)

he's definitely the antagonist of HEA, in that he is what TLQ and the Princess and the player need to overcome, but he's not a VILLAIN (which i think is most clearly illustrated in the moment where the Princess admits she's unhappy, that she's never been happy here, and his reaction is to GIVE UP instead of lash out harder)

i never got the sense that The Smitten was ever putting any blame on The Damsel-- he always considered *himself* to be the problem-- he puppeteers TLQ just as much as he does the Princess, even if we can't hear him while she can, and he asks TLQ/the player through her "isn't this enough? isn't this what you wanted?"

which in and of itself is an unhealthy way to approach a relationship-- blaming oneself for every bit of conflict or lapse in synchronicity is just as harmful as laying all the blame on the other person. there IS no blame-- sometimes people disagree or have conflicting needs or desires, and that's not anybody's "fault" because that's just how people and relationships WORK.

...can you believe i wrote out all of this when my original intention was to lay out an entirely different point about a read on The Damsel/HEA routes that wasn't about relationships at all?

OKAY!

THAT GOT AWAY FROM ME LET ME START AGAIN

so i don't think that looking at The Damsel/HEA through a lens of "what does this say about relationships and expectations and respecting other people's agency" is incorrect-- clearly i have a lot of thoughts about that lens!

but i wanted to offer another one that i haven't seen yet:

The Damsel/HEA route as a commentary on what makes a satisfying narrative

if you play out The Damsel route just single-mindedly taking actions to free her-- it's kinda dull, isn't it? like-- it's not without its charms! The Smitten is silly and entertaining and the Narrator's exaggerated pettiness is very funny! but ultimately, that's about it.

potential sources of conflict are brushed aside-- if you took the blade with you, you just drop it and it gets forgotten; the Damsel's hand slips right out of the manacle with no effort or harm; when the Narrator locks the basement door, every 'choice' you make just magically unlocks it right away. and then you're outside, what you wanted to do from the start. ...so what do we do now?

nothing, actually. the chapter ends, and there is no chapter 3. the game itself continues, but that ending feels about as substantial as the Narrator's "Good Ending" where you follow his instructions without question and accomplish his goal immediately.

if you DON'T take either of the actions that lead to one of Damsel's chapter 3's, there's very little variation in The Damsel's story-- pretty much all of it comes down to slight differences in dialogue. there's no "the princess kills you" outcome. the closest thing to an alternate end to The Damsel is if you deconstruct her-- and even then, it feels like less an "alternate route" and more like-- a cheeky acknowledgement of the lack of substance, because that isn't a bug, it's a feature!

but if you introduce conflict-- either in the more direct sense by slaying The Damsel or in the more interpersonal sense by highlighting a mis-match in her and TLQ's desires-- suddenly the story opens up! there are a bunch of new possibilities and a bunch of new outcomes, and all of them are more interesting than "you achieve your goal with trivial effort, hooray!"

Even if you wind up finishing HEA on a note that is superficially very similar to the easy end of The Damsel's route-- you leave hand in hand with her, the narrator conceding defeat, and the last image of her before TSM takes her is a warm, tender smile-- it FEELS so much more like a genuine happy ending-- even though the Princess' face is still streaked and stained from her tears. BECAUSE of that.

it's one of the most heartwarming moments in the game, and one that has made me misty eyed every time i've seen it, and it's BECAUSE of the conflict you had to go through to get there.

conflict is what drives a compelling narrative, is the takeaway. it precludes PERFECT endings, perhaps, but not happy endings-- it's what makes those imperfect happy endings feel substantial and earned.

even the dinner and the board game contribute to the idea-- the description of the food is some really lovely writing, to the point where i sat through and listened to it all again even though i knew nothing really happens during it-- but *nothing really happens during it*. it doesn't move the narrative forward-- you're just as hungry as you were when you started. it just stalls the story in place, and every time you go through it again it's less satisfying until it's outright unpleasant. the description of the meal also notably gets simpler each time, and less detailed-- there's only so much that you can say about it before you run out of things to describe.

the board game is similar-- the way that it's described the first time you play even sounds like the description of an exciting story! and then the board resets, and you do it all again just the same. and so on. the game/story stops being exciting and the wins or losses stop feeling like they mean anything-- because is conflict really conflict, is a challenge really a challenge, if you're always tracing the same path, always making moves where you already know the outcome? it becomes "a slog towards the end"

and this is how i tie the idea of "what Damsel/HEA has to say about relationships" and "what Damsel/HEA has to say about narratives" together:

ultimately, the statements can be summarized the same way "whether in a narrative or a relationship, 'perfection' is unattainable, but you wouldn't actually want it anyway"

conflict, substance, variety

in a relationship there will always be differences of opinion, differing goals etc-- variety between the members of the relationship, knowing and sharing this substantial and non-superficial information about one another, navigating the resultant conflict-- that's what allows the relationship to grow and deepen, and what allows the people in it to grow as individuals as well.

in a narrative, or in Narratives, as a whole, conflict is what makes things HAPPEN, substance makes them feel like what happens MATTERS, like something is being communicated, variety means that you're learning or considering something new-- and those are what make a narrative capable of impacting a person, of changing them, of being remembered

[princessjojo-x]

Venus Synastry

ignore the crossed out parts, that’s only for me & my chart

💝 venus conjunct venus - partners express love in the same way as one another. however, sometimes it’s too much of the same energy causing partners to clash over their more challenging venus traits. this aspect works best if the venus signs aren’t in detriment or malefic.

💝 venus conjunct mars - this aspect indicates partners progressing at a high speed. they may become sexual with each other quickly due to the guaranteed sexual attraction. however, partners may get under each others skin & mars especially isn’t afraid to bite back. usually mars takes on the masculine role & makes the first move on venus. whereas venus takes on the more feminine, passive & seductive role.

💝 venus conjunct sun - this interaction played out differently to what i expected. firstly, the connection didn’t feel that sexual or romantic. consequently, the chemistry wasn’t strong enough to warrant any sort of longing for him. this may may be an outcome of the traditional gender roles being reversed, with the man’s femininity amplified through his venus & the woman’s masculinity amplified through her sun. secondly, i felt it was a very “all or nothing” rxship; it felt too demanding & i felt suffocated at times. however, these rxship always take on the qualities of the sign the conjunction is in. in my case, it was in aries, which would explain why i felt that way. regardless, within this rxship venus is responsible for the harmony & functionality. venus seeks attention & validation from sun.

💝 venus trine saturn - found in many long term rxships (libra/aquarius venus or capricorn/virgo saturn)

💝 venus conjunct juno - juno views venus as perfection personified (leo venus or taurus juno)

💝 venus conjunct pluto - both partners feel intense emotions for eachother even when they're not together. pluto sometimes wants to control venus into only looking & thinking abt them. (sag venus)

💝 venus opposite venus - this aspect promises powerful physical attraction & undeniable passion. oppositions in astrology often represent polarity, two energies in tension, pulling in opposite directions. partners have different needs, values, desires, love styles & rxship expectations. although the difference can lead to conflict & misunderstandings, it creates a sense of intrigue & fascination for one another. partners are drawn to each other’s differences & find they complement each other well. for example, a a scorpio venus man & a taurus venus woman: he is drawn to her grounded & steady nature, whilst she is intrigued by his intensity & mystery.the difference pushes both partners out of their comfort zones which can feel exciting & daunting simultaneously. the push & pull dynamic can result in cat & mouse games or subtle mind games. partners give very subtle hints & vibes to each other but there’s always one partner who is more oblivious than the other.

💝 venus square venus - unresolved trauma from both parties taint the rxship. partners may have different love languages & polarising tastes, for example, music, lifestyles, slightly trivial things. despite the negative connotation attached to this aspect, it is very common aspect within couples. partners can be very loyal to each other but have a very different way of showing it. (aqua/leo venus)

💝 venus opposite rising - usually venus thinks rising is extremely physically attractive whilst rising only has a mild attraction to venus. but once they get to know each other rising starts to feel deeply attracted to venus. this is a rxship that gets better with time. (cap venus or scorpio rising)

💝 venus opposite pluto - instability (gemini venus/ scorpio pluto)

💝 venus square mars - these planets reflect our desires & passions. harsh aspects (square/opposite) between the two it indicates hesitation & restraint regarding intimacy. this aspect specifically can be an challenging & awkward bc there’s tension that neither partners are comfortable with. one partner (typically mars) is active/aggressive whilst the other partner (typically genus) is passive/stable. mars can come off too strong & this makes venus feel repulsed. partners need patience & maturity to work through their differences &!understand one another. (leo/aquarius/scorpio venus or mars)

💝 venus square pluto - creates a lot of sexual tension between the two. pluto becomes very possessive & jealous over venus, even if they’re not together, pluto will act like venus is theirs. however, pluto tends to be very lowkey abt their feelings it’s rare anyone will notice. (aqua/leo pluto or virgo/pisc venus)

💝 venus square eros - lack of common ground (leo/aqua eros or scorpio/taurus venus)

💝 venus square saturn - painful aspect. saturn feels like they’re babysitting venus. venus feels misunderstood & isn’t able to express themselves. saturn restricts venus from being able to express any kind of loving venus like nature. a very binding aspects regardless of how much partners love or hate one another. however, venus is going to feel frozen & very misunderstood. venus is restricted from expressing lighthearted affection & is giving negative undertones from saturn. also, this aspect indicates a slow burn rxship & taking a long time to finally get together. (leo/aquarius saturn of virgo/pisces venus)

💝 venus square rising - partners have different social preferences, love languages or lifestyles which causes tension or discomfort. rising is not just how you look but how you act too. venus dislikes how rising acts & carries themselves. rising is probably not venus’s usual type & venus may have not noticed rising straight away. rising may feel unloved & unwanted by venus. rising may feel they’re not attractive enough for venus or that venus is too good for them. also, partners sweep problems under the carpet to maintain harmony but overtime this turns into hate & resentment. on the bright side, they are usually viewed as an attractive duo or the “it couple”. (leo/aquarius asc or libra/aries venus)

💝 venus square neptune - doubts from venus preventing trust (leo/aquarius neptune or taurus/scorpio venus)

💝 venus square uranus - this connection usually ends abruptly. one partner, usually uranus will ghost/leave when venus least expects it. (taurus/scorpio venus or leo/aqua uranus)

[imustbenuts]

nuts reading trigun in japanese 3 - "weirdo" and vash's pronoun switching

disclaimer: my jp reading posts are all for triangulation purposes and nothing else. scanlating mangas is tough work. @-@ i know this.

"Weirdo"

the word 'weirdo' in 2024 english carries connotations of neutral-bad or positive depending on the context of the speaker. depending on how one curates their internet space, weirdo often leans more positively with the same meaning as eccentric, but not always.

however, but in JP, "weird" is more specific and often negative. there's the well known, hentai 変態 (ie. deviant, pervert, freak, extremely negative in tone), and in this case, kimochi warui 気持ち悪い (gross, off-putting, bad vibes). eccentrics are more as 変人 henjin and carries a more neutral tone.

in this panel here papa nebreska uses 気持ち悪い in katakana キモチワルイ in reaction to vash busting his ass saving people and putting out of harms' way. vash's vibes are so off putting to this wanted man he's actually creeped out.

this is particularly interesting to me bc the english translation didn't end up portraying how utterly weird vash's mindset is fully. it wasnt until wolfwood points out how flawed vash's pacifist mindset do i get a proper frame of reference of norms in this world, but i might be having skill issues in english comprehension. ;w;

Pronoun switching

quick. 俺 Ore! 僕 Boku! 私 Watashi! they all mean "I", and there's 2 spectrum of expressions going on here thats commonly believed. 1st being Masculinity to Femininity. what's the 2nd?

the answer is... Rudeness/Assertiveness to Politeness. and gosh does vash switch a lot between Boku and Ore in the first 4 chapters of this manga lmao.

(to be clear, while i am aware of trans hc thats very popular in the fandom, im not at all diminishing or talking about gender expression specifically. im talking about what vash is presenting himself as in context.)

so to perhaps oversimplify this, in JP the idea of politeness and hierarchy is so super duper important, its very built into the language itself. and Japanese is a very high context language. if someone of a higher or equal standing uses "Ore", its totally fine. but if someone of a lower standing uses "Ore", they've committed a social faux pas.

as an obvious example, if a fresh new employee approaches his Boss with "Ore", he's potentially getting dressing down in the company. maybe in front of his coworkers. if this employee forgoes polite speech (keigo) and uses a too Assertive and Casual speech, they've Really Fucked Up and are one foot out the door.

this is also tied up in gender to some extent, hence why girls using Ore is incredibly uncommon, but guys would use Watashi in certain contexts such as talking to their Boss. (woo woo the forces of hierarchy/patriarchy... or something.)

so. vash switches his pronouns for the same effect. when he uses Ore, he's making himself sound more assertive and confident. when he uses Boku, he's often making himself sound less threatening, smaller, open, and trying to avoid conflict.

sound familiar?

bc if you translated all of that into a character design instead of relying on just jp pronouns, we'd get TriStamp Vash.

slight spoilers, but this is even true in one of the tensest moments between vash and wolfwood, where the latter provokes vash and tears into his pacifism ideology. vash sticks with boku in this scene as he says his piece.

if he ever uses watashi, it's bc he wants to be polite straight out of the gate with an air of formality. (this is japanese manners and the proper approach to talking to strangers. mainly to get a feel for each others standing without offense until context changes.)

i also wanna point out maybe something obvious here but.

real life pronoun switching in japanese is a COMMON thing. no one ever really sticks to 1 pronoun bc of Good Manners and the aforementioned hierarchical systems in place. it is only mostly in anime/manga and video games where characters overly prefer 1 due to this being a good shorthand for characterization. this being how rude or polite they are, and in some cases, Gender.