#bc damn if it was all for nothing

[m4rs-ex3]

things that stella has apparently

a crystal that does NOT look exactly like the moon opal she took in 4x07, but it still could be

two shells that she took from the tidepools

three scrolls and a book, presumably the ones that she took from the bookery, although the only one we saw her take was the sealed one, so....

a big ass nail??

finnegrin's keys, which makes sense but i never realized that she just kept them lol

callum's key, which is even funnier that she just kept it

and then TWO (potentially three [behind the tail]) scumport tokens, which..... terrifies me. i'm praying to GOD that stella just stole those and that rayla didn't go through even more shit for them

[lucyllawless]

[keii]

Drew a nalu sketch bc for some reason my old ass art of them is making its rounds again on here lol

[crimeschild]

the barbie (2023) experience as an afab non binary person is just [reconnecting with your femininity and love for pink bc you couldnt when u were younger bc being too girly will get u made fun of] [feeling guilt bc u dont identify with being a girl but girlhood is so inherently beautiful and magical and no experience is truly like it] [healing the inner child in you by allowing yourself to enjoy dolls and pink and maximalism] [unapologetically letting yourself wear pink and be stereotypically girly in a society where being non binary means you have to be presenting androgynous 24/7] [getting your grown-up heart shattered and then put back together again by your inner child using sparkly glue over and over in the span of two hours] [realizing that no matter what you do you have somewhat experienced girlhood and it shaped you to be the person you are today and you will never get to erase that experience or truly disconnect yourself from it] [appreciating and understanding your mother in a way that you thought wasnt possible without experiecing motherhood]

[sergle]

I'm thinking abt that pretty fall leaves embroidery pattern post and about how like... it is categorically a repost, it's a reupload. right? a thing that is generally disliked. but because it's credited, it's genuinely boosting the artist in question. and it could ALWAYS be like this. reposting content could ALWAYS be a symbiotic relationship, but because sourcing back to the original creator of something is so uncommon, it's just easier to ask people not to repost it at all. and people still don't understand the difference. or they'll go to the effort of cropping out usernames/signatures to repost something, which is More Effort than literally crediting the creator of something you liked enough to want to repost. Like. I literally don't actually care if my own shit gets reposted, you have to understand. I just don't want it STOLEN. But "do not repost" is easier to write on my art than "you can repost this, but don't alter the image/remove my signature, don't you dare write 'credit goes to the artist' because that is not credit, please link back to my original post or someplace that you can actually find me. please use an actual link/url instead of writing a non-clickable link of my username, because making it text instead of a clickable link cuts the number of people who will go to the effort of visiting my own page in Half." All those aggregate themed accounts, those fuckin annoying as hell instagrams and facebook groups that are like "body positive art we love wamen 💕 hashtag feminism" and then MASS-STEAL plus sized art created by women, if pages like these that always go and steal my older self-portraits and other works... If they just put a link to my prints of those pieces in the text of those posts, or, fuck, my commission info page? I would literally be living on the moon right now. I would have a house on the moon

[yuwuta]

Your thing about katsuki losing his shit when u don’t answer his calls is hilarious to me bc he definitely would and since that’s just roommates that implies that when you’re actually like together he’d be so much worse (And eren does this too I can’t help but bring him up)

he takes it so so seriously it’s comical. ever since katsuki started at ua, he’s acted like he’s your government assigned bodyguard, too. and through all the attacks and shit that happened while he was in school, he really doesn’t take any chances, so he needs you to pick up the damn phone when he calls. you guys only became roommates because he was one missed call away from having a heart attack, please he does not play around when it comes to you. showing up to your place of employment at 2pm in full hero gear and dirt on his face because he called you thrice between 11am and 1:32pm and texted twice and you still didn’t answer so he’s coming to check up on you himself.

missing a call from him while you’re on way home from work bc you were underground on the subway, and not even realizing until you open the door and there’s katsuki standing in the entryway with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face and looks to your phone sticking out of your bag, taps on it, and dramatically goes “oh, so it does work!” to which you roll your eyes, and earn a poke to the nose and katsuki grumbling, “answer when i call, dummy,”’ before going back to the kitchen to finish dinner. he’s such a brat about it (and the only reason he didn’t go collect you from the train station out of panic is because you two have each other’s locations now—in an effort to stop dynamight from interrupting your work meetings).

when you two finally start dating, honestly it calms a bit. naturally, you’re spending more time together, and less virtual communication is needed. his panic really only sets in when there’s an attack or a villain on the run. he calls you before and after missions—sometimes he calls during them, he’s got to make sure that you’re okay, that you’re safe, that he can come back to you when it’s all said and done. all his friends say he’s whipped but katsuki really couldn’t care less, he needs you to be there. and let the record show, that when you call him first, he always comes running

[cdroloisms]

thinking about c!dream earlier on in the server just makes me sad man. like, c!dream has never been a perfect character. he's always been flawed, always been a bit of an asshole, always had control issues. but also he knew that. he tried to work on that. he and tommy were friends, despite being flawed people with their own issues that would bump into conflicts because of the ways that they differed. c!dream tried, god, he tried; he wasn't even on the server, when the drug van happened, and walked into a place with someone who was practically a stranger to him building a wall and calling for war and having turned half the people dream knew against him, apparently, for no reason that he could've known at the time, and he had looked straight at tommy and tubbo and asked if that was what they really wanted when wilbur told them that there was no such thing as dual citizenship. he tells tommy when he has to sell a disc for spirit's leather even though tommy had surrendered the discs to him at the end of the revolution because he knows it'll matter to him. he and tommy truce, multiple times, and c!dream gets tangled into conflicts that literally don't involve him repeatedly and gets targeted Because He's Dream repeatedly and he plays along with that trivia contest and he gives gifts to fundy and tommy after terrorizing them a little for fun and he plays along with the dreamon thing and he keeps getting pulled into fights that weren't his but tries to make them a little more fair when they get him involved. he fucks around with tommy and they have fun, they're friends, and when he and wilbur look like they're in danger dream is one of the first to find them and lend them real, practical, valuable aid. he calls himself "Big D" in that book and he tells the man that wrote him as a tyrant that he doesn't want to be a villain in the story anymore. he asks tommy if he's okay, and watches that kid's back when he walks alone and unarmed into manberg, and fights with him at the battle of the lake and all of that is thrown back in his face as being a lie. half the intial community structures that exist were built by him; the community house, the nether portal and hub, the prime path. during a time where every other piece of leverage got burned or killed (rip the casualties of the pet war), dream was kind of known for being one that could be fairly traded with, that would minimize permanent damage. the kills in the final control room were originally to strip lmanburg of their gear, which he had kept in a chest so it could be returned to them after the war.

like no c!dream isn't perfect at the beginning of the server. yes he's kind of a jerk sometimes, kind of an asshole sometimes, kind of neurotic most of the time. but god dammit like c!dream does try to mitigate the worst of his control issues, when they flare up early on; the initial disc war ends with tommy getting his discs back as well as a stack of diamonds, in exchange for a netherite chestplate. he's a flawed character and he's still someone pretty friendly on the whole to most of the server, he's also kind of just known for being a little weird. he gives gifts randomly. he fixed creeper holes, and houses, and went along with bits. like whatever im a c!drolo c!dream woobifier and i admit it lol but for as much evil as he ends up doing, pretty damn consistently early on, he's . friendly? kind? funny? helpful? their neighbor. their friend. c!dream isn't just some stranger that flew off the handle; he's someone they knew and lived with who had his actions taken in bad faith because the goddamn story said so and kept fucking trying anyway until he believed the lie too. like he was just a guy!! a guy they knew and lived with!!! like my god

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 785: Sakamichi's orders!!

Pag 1

1: From this year

2: I went from the one who receives orders

3: Onoda

Onoda!!

4: to the one who gives orders!!

Pag 2

1: Onoda Sakamichi, third Inter High

Pag 3

1: carrying the same bib number 3 as Makishima, as captain he will make history by making Sohoku win their third championship in a row!!

Pag 4

1: I'll give you your orders

When we enter the mountain, go ahead

Take the lead and climb!!

2: It's your order, take the mountain stage on the second day

When times are tough, all you need is one good goal to achieve!! “We'll carry you to the mountain”!!

I'll do my best to preserve my strength!!

3: Think....

Think of what's ahead, of what's happening now, and about the team

Pag 5

1: I have to make the best choice!!

2: Calm down....!!

Pfuuu...

Calm down

Pfuuu...

3: Look around you

4: I have to have a clear picture!!

5: The start of the mountain is approaching

6: The pack's atmosphere is changing!!

Pag 6

1: One person jumped ahead!!

2: The balance is broken!!

3: And several people are following!!

4: It's here, Onoda-kun, are you ready?

Yeah!!

5: The climbers are starting to move!!

Pag 7

1: We're entering the mountain!! From here on we're on the national highway 500!!

Pag 8

1: It's the mountain stage, climbing Mt- Hiko, once a sacred groun in Fukuoka!!

Pag 9

2: Once they pass one of the archways of the huge Shinto shrine made of stone of Mt. Hiko....

3: The real climb starts!!

Pag 10

1: Here Kyushu's Kumamoto Daichi's climber, Fujiwara, is moving!!

Kumadai is moving, chase him!!

2: I'm Higo's new generation, mokkosu!!

3: Waaaa things are getting hectic all of a sudden, teh.....!! They're going one by one chasing Kumadai-san!!

4: Calm down, Rokudai

For now, it's enough that we stay at the front fo the pack. Our problem is....

Waaa, I'm calm...!!

Pag 11

1: Our problem....

2: Our main issue....

3: is when will he move!?

6: Ha.... Hakogaku is moving!?

Is the Sky Prince going!?

He stood up

Pag 13

3: Not... yet!?

4: He just reached out to take the bottle

That scared me...

We've only just entered the mountain so from their point of view it's not time to start yet?

6: Tch

7: Not yet.....?

Pag 14

1: His opponent is Onoda, so it will most probably turn into a close battle... so, thinking about that, he plans on starting from the most efficient place?

2: Could it be that he's waiting for the Mountain King to go?

The other way around....?

3: He plans on going once the “Mountain King” moves?

Manami is

4: waiting for the Mountain King

Is that so?

Waiting for me....

Pag 15

1: …. no!!

2: That's not it!!

3: Think of what's ahead, of what's happening now, and about the team

Teh!?

4: I have to make the best decision

Everyone!!

Pag 16

1: These are your orders!!

2: “Orders”!!

3: “Orders”!!

5: Onoda-san!!

6: Onoda-kun!!

Pag 17

1: 200m from now Manami-kun will move, I'll chase him, and leave everything else to you!!

2: Danchiku-kun!!

Yessir!!

3: Please get ahead, pull the team, and clear the mountain safely

4: Yessir!!

5: Imaizumi-kun and Naruko-kun, from now on preserve your strength and get ready for the finish line

Yeah...

6: Rokudai-kun....

Teh!!

Wait, Onoda

7: How...

Pag 18

1: do you know that Manami is going to move 200m from now!?

5: Telepathy...

6: He's waiting

7: Most likely!!

“Maybe”!!

8: The beginning of this mountain is full of zigzags

9: And Manami-kun's ranks are choosing to ride on the right side very close to the guardrail

10: On the mountain, the pack

Pag 19

1: when it's time to turn a series of zigzags, temporarily stretches vertically

If it's a left turn then the cyclists on the left will take the lead, and if it's a right turn then the cyclists on the right will do that

3: From the course map it says that from the next curve the slope will slightly increase

4: It's just a conjecture, but

5: I think Manami-kun will move there

So he's waiting

For the most advantageous position for jumping forward

Pag 20

1: the next right curve!!

Pag 21

1: Manami?

2: He's going to jump forward!?

3: At the next right curve!!

Pag 25

1: Manami jumped forward!! Here!?

Huuh!?

From the lead of the vertical line!!

He opened a gap too large to close in an instant!!

2: He really jumped forward!!

3: Hakogaku' Manami is pushing on

4: I'm going to accelerate at full throttle!!

Go, Onoda-kun!!

[m00ngbin]

ITS TFS TUESDAY.

Chapter 26!!!! The last chapter in act two!!!! (ARUAGJRRGAJEH)

Oh the original thing the 2nd image is from is the Tome (reigen) manga where ONE is advertising the mp100 stageplay btw

One of the top contenders for my favorite page and it's not even canon to the story or anything

[n1blakelover]

i feel like i’m the only one that doesn’t want arc 3 (seasons 8-10) to be set far into the future. like im talking 10 years into the future. because i know that if this happens and the characters are in marriages and have their own children then the story is more than likely going to be about their children and i personally want to know more about the characters we’ve been with, not their kids. don’t get me wrong, i would love to see domestic rayllum and their kids and how all the other characters have grown up, but i don’t want those children to be the focus. i want more of the characters we already know and love. which is why if we do get arc 3, i want it to still be about our main characters (obviously while branching out to seeing others like how arc 2 has branched out to lux aurea) and their conflicts and stories and lives. i’ve seen a lot of theories for how they could still be the focus and my favorite one is probably with the antagonists being the cosmic order against our characters

[chamm0y]

yeah ok thanks

[possamble]

What are your headcanons about Marcille's mom if you have any? It's interesting that what drew Donato to her was cause she lived the history he studied, or that was said somewhere at least. She must've had an interesting life.

so this was going to be just a normal answer but then I realized I have a Lot of Things To Say. so here goes, a compilation of what we know for a fact from the canon, what I've extrapolated from the visual cues and details, and my theories based on all of that.

Things we know for a fact about Marcille's mother because they were explicitly stated in the manga and supplemental materials:

She was a court mage for a Tall-man kingdom at the southern part of the Northern Continent

Donato, a court historian, fell in love with her because she had lived through the history he was studying, and he courted her for 17 years (age 15 to 32) before getting married

She was a cheerful person who rarely showed extreme emotion and took things as they came

She always cooked a huge meal for Marcille on her birthdays

She remarried a gnome after Donato's death and a short distance away from Marcille's childhood home

Pipi, Marcille's pet bird, was actually older than Marcille and originally belonged to her mother (bird died at 62)

She was extremely heartbroken when Donato died and ultimately ended up instilling a deep fear of mortality in Marcille with her words

the only time she showed extreme emotion in front of her family was when Donato could no longer eat his favourite dish near the end of his life.

She scolded Marcille for being cruel to ants (implying she can have a stern side when needed)

Things that are explicitly shown but mostly through visual cues

She has a very distinctive style of dress always involving a ribbon choker (mirroring Marcille's habit of always wearing a matching choker with any of her outfits that don't cover her neck)

She was almost stereotypically good at housekeeping and traditionally "wifely" things (very frequently depicted wearing an apron or doing some domestic chore when not at work, seems to have been an avid cook).

She knits? (also, note the affectionate smile as she's looking at Donato and Marcille reading a book together in the full panel)

She was as excited for Marcille's milestones as Donato was.

She didn't tell Marcille much about elven food

(there are a couple things that this panel in particular implies:

She lived a good deal of her life (if not being born and raised) in a mainly elven country in the West, implied by her knowing enough of an elven region's cuisine to prefer Tall-man food over it

seems to have a pretty carefree and casual demeanour overall, if this is how she replied to Marcille asking her about it (sounds like she never gave her culinary preferences that much thought to begin with)

slightly related to number 2, it seems like she and Marcille had a fairly casual parent-child dynamic (especially in comparison to the Toudens' memory of their father)

(local elf tastes Italian food once and never goes back))

However, she seems a lot more... serious in most of the other times we see her? Almost like the very stereotypical archetype of a graceful elf.

Subsequent conclusions about her personality:

Usually pretty carefree and cheerful at home, has been a loving and attentive parent throughout Marcille's childhood (while not being so doting that she didn't discipline Marcille).

Slightly more conjectural theories on her personality:

Had a much more graceful and professional personality at work, which would explain the more serious portraits we see of her.

Given that both she and Donato had positions at the royal court, it seems a little odd that she'd go out of her way to do all the housework herself, so maybe she just enjoyed doing it?

Now taping all the evidence together and toeing the line between analysis and fanfiction:

It's clear that she loved Donato very much and was utterly devastated by losing him. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me in what little we see of her:

Doesn't she seem... angry? The way she's gritting her teeth, clutching the tablecloth, and how this is the first and only time we see her eyes opened that wide. In the following panel, you see her being quiet and dejected after her initial outburst. She's still crying very intensely, but her brows are furrowed, and she's not really responding to Donato's affection in her body language.

We're not told the details of how she felt about losing Donato other than that it upset her. But this, to me, implies that she was angry and resented that he was aging, that the end of his life was approaching. An "it's not fair" type of preemptive grief. And if this was the first and last time she cried like this in front of her family, she was either very good at coping in private... or very bad at letting herself feel unpleasant emotions until they become unavoidable and end up overwhelming her.

It's not too remarkable a detail on the surface. It's even reminiscent of what the audience has seen of Marcille. But... when it comes to the big picture, you'd think an elf who voluntarily chose to marry a tall-man and have a half-elf child would have been better prepared for this.

It kind of recontextualizes her cheerfulness to me.

"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay!" (or some variation thereof, depending on what translation you have).

And this is stated to contrast her extreme grief when finally confronting Donato's failing body and eventual death. But I'm wondering if... maybe this optimism was why she was so upset. What if she went into all of it thinking "everything's gonna be okay"? What if she was a little young by elven standards, and just followed her heart thinking that her own resilience would get her through anything?

Of course, only to get completely overwhelmed when she actually loses Donato. She turns into a completely different person. And that's heartbreaking on its own-- but what the audience sees is the effect it had on Marcille. Can you imagine being her, watching your invincible and upbeat mother suddenly lose all the light in her eyes in one go?

I've already made a huge post about how I think Marcille models her "work persona" off her mother, but another thing that stuck with me as I was looking for more details in the manga was this:

copy pasting from the other post i made about it lmao it's like... the second she resigns herself to lifelong pain and terror, there's another portrait of her mother facing her like this. with their heads bowed, in mirrored body language of resignation and despair and sorrow. Except it's posed like Marcille is still looking at her mother but her mother is looking away.

It took me a second to realize, but I think that it's a visual metaphor for the fact that Marcille's mother was the only long-lived role model she had-- and she failed to model healthy grief for her daughter. I don't say this as an accusation or to disparage her as a character, but just as a matter of fact. In her, Marcille was seeing herself older and losing a short-lived spouse or loved one of her own, and all she saw was hopelessness.

But her mother didn't mean to instill hopelessness and terror in her. She wasn't really thinking of how it would truly affect Marcille at all (at least, that's how I'm interpreting her looking down and away from Marcille in the metaphor), she was just sad. And she, in her own way, was trying to protect her daughter and help her prepare for future losses.

What she meant was "loss is inevitable, and you have to learn how to be in pain but live on anyway." What Marcille heard was "loss is inevitable, and you will be scared and hurt for the rest of your life."

Again. Marcille's mother doesn't feature explicitly in the story the way her father does -- but in so many ways, her shadow, her silhouette, her reflection is always hanging over Marcille.

All that to say... headcanon-wise (everything from here on is 100% without evidence lmao), I'd like to think that she matured and realized that she failed Marcille. I imagine her being regretful about it, wanting a chance to fix it but never finding a way to insert herself back into Marcille's life when Marcille is so so so busy becoming the most accomplished mage possible. I imagine her being herself again, now, so many years after her loss and after remarrying -- but with her cheerfulness tempered with a lot more wisdom and the pain of having gone through loss like that. I think the second Marcille actually tells her what happened in the dungeon, she'd want to go running to her daughter again -- if Marcille tells her the full truth instead of just being embarrassed she let things get that far. (oh, the tragedy of her wanting to be more like her mother and an accomplished adult who doesn't need to be babied... being embarrassed to actually tell her mother how much she fucked up...)

There's also the tension of her having remarried -- I know that there's at least a little bit of resentment that Marcille harbours about that, because she's childish like that at heart even if she makes an effort not to externalize it. I think that her mother would be aware of that, potentially adding to her sense of guilt and apprehension at trying to reappear/intrude on Marcille's life. I honestly don't think Marcille has met her stepfather -- or even considers him a stepfather rather than "mama's new husband" and kind of a total stranger. I think she and her mother actively don't talk about it in their correspondence, like an elephant in the room.

but, ultimately, I think her mother is on her side no matter what. Ancient magic? Dark necromancy? Sure, she'll feel guilty and like she was partially responsible for setting Marcille down such a painful path, but she wouldn't care. that's her daughter!! she would've moved back west and been petitioning for her at the court, buying a house right next to the Canaries barracks and visiting her every day that she wasn't on a mission. And if her husband had opinions on Marcille becoming a "dark arts user," he either gets over it or it's divorce with him. Yes, she might have had her optimism completely humbled by losing Donato like that -- but she's still headstrong and self-assured and she doesn't care what people think of her. It's her way or the highway and she's always going to be in Marcille's corner.

(She also needs a name lol. I went with Juno, just to be cute about "Marcille"s closest real life equivalent being Marcella, which is the female version of Marcellus, which in turn is a diminutive of Marcus, which was derived from Mars. Absolutely in love with Marcille potentially being named after Ares/Mars the fucking god of war btw)

[birdcatt]

ok so i KNOW hero/darkrai and/or partner/darkrai is very much a road of hurt/comfort. HOWEVER i think hero/partner/darkrai has Comedic Potential

forbidden version where leaf doesn't have floppy ears below the cut

[citrusai]

weekes saying all that mythal shit is up to interpretation is so weird to me because instead of worrying about leaving all of solas' past up to vague interpretation to (new) players because you're too chickenshit to stand by your established lore you could've focused on ghilan'nain and elgar'nan and who they were and what they became. elgar'nan literally let the other evanuris slay his wife and he watched on, and then he rotted in a prison made by what he referred to as his wife's "lapdog" and second in command general. and what of ghilan'nain? what is their relationship? why is it just the two of them in that prison when there were more evanuris trapped in there? why are they simultaneously this omnipotent threat capable of spawning blight at will but also two dimensional villains chasing their own tails half the game while solas just poses and speaks in his riddles in the fade. also a fragment of mythal is inside of morrigan, does no part of her gaf that her husband is literally terrorizing the world she loves? hello??

[kyoukorpse]

need to draw narinder when he was first indoctrined by chirin bc heeeee was definitely not As Large, not skinny, but he gained a lot of weight from just... being fed. so much.

chirin has been fasting for a long time (when they first started as a vessel they deadass forgot to eat all the time and would pass out randomly) but becoming an infant god they stop eating entirely and just remember when to feed their followers when they're hungry or give them resources to feed themselves ofc

but narinder was a god for eons and its like wtf do u feed a god who's mortal now and How Much should u. so they just fed him so much. they fed him like u would a highschool football player. they also put him everywhere in every job possible to see what he would excel at but that took forever since he was dogshit at everything for a while (eventually he would become best at "assisting" with difficult followers and going on missions, but also helping with heavy lifting in construction n whatnot).

so. obviously over time he became built like a philips refrigerator. lmao.

[feroluce]

Belobog was my fave main quest but a lot of it is so. Contradictory. It's like they had multiple groups doing different shit and none of them checked in with each other for consistency. And you see this so much in Gepard's profile.

So in the main quest, they made him unfailingly, unquestionably loyal to Cocolia. Gepard's character arc is him learning to question authority etc etc. And this isn't even a bad thing; that's a story worth telling! It makes good conflict between him and Serval! And I love that we got Gepard as a boss battle and I get to see him all the time in SU!

But then you look at his character stories and it's like. The complete opposite.

According to his profile, Gepard has already HAD this awakening, long before the Astral Express, and he'd already decided Cocolia sucks. Even outside of his stories, there's a pretty damning readable between him and Pela.

He even disobeyed direct orders right in front of her- he has been disobeying orders for a while now!

So I've decided I'm marrying the two different sides of this into a 1.5k fic-ish thingy, because I think there's some fun potential there with Gepard not trusting Cocolia, but still having to pretend to be a good obedient little soldier.

Anyway. I love to think of it as like. Gepard knows Cocolia has sunk into her apathy. He can see it in her eyes every time he looks at her. She doesn't care. Not about him, not about Pela, not about all his soldiers on the frontlines giving their lives to protect the citizens. And that's... It makes him bristle a bit, but ok. Gepard can deal with this. Even if Cocolia no longer cares, as long as she does her job then it's fine. Having compassion behind an action doesn't matter as much as the action itself. If Cocolia's heart is no longer swayed, then he'll just have to care twice as hard to pick up the slack. He considers it part of his duty as a captain of the guard anyway. It's fine. Gepard can deal with it.

And then, Cocolia starts coming down to the restricted zone. Issuing direct orders.

And Gepard realizes he is in way over his head.

Because Cocolia orders him to stay back and issue commands from the ramparts, away from all his comrades, away from where he can protect them.

Gepard had thought nothing could be as bad as watching a fellow guard die right next to him. But the first time he watches someone struck by a killing blow, so far away, it hurts. Every defensive scar across his arms itches, his fingers curl in want of a weapon, the cold cannot numb his hands enough as they desperately ache for his shield. It hurts.

Gepard tries to find any reason to stay. Because surely... He knows Cocolia has lost her love for her people, but surely... She wouldn't...

One day, Cocolia orders for their gunners to advance 20 yards. There are no survivors. She almost looks like she smiles.

Gepard doesn't sleep that night.

Pela brings him the report at the end of the first month; and then the month after that, and the month after that. A significant uptick in losses, and all of it started on that first day Cocolia started overriding his authority and issuing her own orders. The ends of Gepard's pens have all been nearly chewed off. Pela outright calls Cocolia an idiot, and Gepard corrects her. Cocolia isn't an idiot. Gepard had known her through Serval, knew her through all her college years and then some, and he knows how intelligent she is. It's not that she's stupid, and it's not that she's inexperienced, it's nothing of the sort.

Cocolia knows exactly what she's doing.

She must, there's no way she could make such a horrible mess of things so badly by accident. And Pela, quick as a whip, sharp as a tack, always too smart for her own good, catches onto the meaning behind Gepard's correction without any further prompting. The tent goes deathly quiet, nothing but the wind howling outside.

"...She's trying to kill us," Pela whispers, her voice swiftly suffocated by the silence.

Gepard swallows. He can't bring himself to correct her this time. There is nothing he could say that he would actually mean.

His gaze drops, back down to his desk and the reports on it. The names aren't listed, just the numbers, but Gepard knows them, knew them, and there must be something wrong, something he's missing, because why, why would she-? What could this possibly accomplish-?

“Gepard! Focus!” Something snaps right under his nose, and Gepard startles, eyes instantly honing in on Pela's irritated face as she leans over his desk. She holds his gaze for a moment before she huffs and begins to pace, wedges a knuckle between her teeth and bites like Gepard hasn't seen her do since cadet school.

Pela angrily strides from one end of his tent to the other, words hissed between her grit teeth. “What are we going to do?” In the dim lighting, Gepard can just barely see the damp spot of blood weeping under her gloves. “We need a plan.”

“A plan?”

“Wh- Yes, a plan! Unless you want more people to die!” Pela rounds on him then, all the wrath of a blizzard, winds roaring and snow sharp enough to cut.

“We don't even know-”

“What does it matter?! She killed-!!” Pela cuts off with a garbled noise when Gepard leaps up from his desk, hastily shoves his hand over her mouth. The prosthetic, not the flesh one, because he knows better than to assume Pela won't seize the opportunity to leave teeth marks in his skin.

“You're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry; you're right. But you need to keep quiet.” Pela quirks an eyebrow at him and Gepard can read the question in her face. “Because we both saw what she did to Serval,” he hisses.

It's amazing the snow plains haven't thawed out yet, the amount of heat Pela can put behind a glare. The mere mention of Serval, and the smoking ruins Cocolia had made of her life and career, have her bristling up like a riled cat. The sudden hot breath she takes fans fog across his metal skin, and Gepard wisely keeps it in place until Pela finally sighs and reaches up, taps her fingertips against the back of his hand.

The second she's free, Pela bats him away and then her knuckle is right back between her teeth again, Gepard leaning back against his desk with his arms crossed to watch her resume her pacing. “If we spread the word, she'll have us discharged and make sure we can't even touch the frontlines,” Pela's voice seethes like an open sore. Gepard nods but keeps his silence. He knows better than to get in her way.

“And if you and I are both out of the picture, Belobog is fucked.” A little harsher than how he would have put it, but there's no denying that they're both important to the city's survival. Pela has the restricted zone running as efficiently as ever, and Gepard had become the youngest captain on record for a reason. “We need to keep this tight under wraps, at least for now… It can't leak to anyone higher up the chain.” Another nod. “Serval might know other discontents…” Another n-

Gepard's head snaps up. “No.”

“No what?”

“No. We're not involving Serval in this.”

Somehow, even the same tone that leaves entire squadrons shaking in their boots has never worked on her. “You're not deciding that for her, Gepard.”

Pela hadn't seen the worst of it, though, back when his sister had just been banned from the Architects. Serval's pride hadn't allowed it. Pela wasn't the one to find her passed out bottle still in hand, hadn't been the one to wash the sick out of her hair or carry her to bed. 

Serval still has trouble thinking clearly when it comes to Cocolia, still can't quite bring herself to be objective. And Gepard maybe doesn't want her to be purely objective- but he would worry a lot less if she thought twice before she acted more often.

“At least let me be the one to bring it up to her.”

“Whatever, fine,” Pela gestures affirmatively at him as she paces past, and Gepard sighs. Good, at least that's one thing he can help.

From there, it's a lot of hemming and hawing and frustration. Cocolia has them under her boot, and Gepard and Pela both know it. Even with the way she's been cracking down on freedoms lately, Cocolia is still, overall, liked by the people. It's unlikely anyone would believe them. They don't even have solid proof, because most people don't know Cocolia as well as they do and won't see the clues in the same light. 

The Fragmentum has been ramping up in recent years, too. Everyone is struggling just to survive as is, they can't afford a fight on two fronts. Gepard is a damn good captain, one of the best for that matter. But they're at a massive disadvantage, his experience is narrowed to fighting a defensive battle against monsters, that's all he's ever done. That's all anyone there has ever done. He has no way of finding first-hand knowledge for taking the offensive against a human opponent, and if he goes at this blind, there's no way he'll get everyone out unscathed. He's going to lose people. He's going to lose a lot of people.

He'd never thought before that Cocolia would have it in her to have someone killed. And with this new knowledge, he has no guarantee she won't go after Serval or Lynx if she decides to retaliate.

Gepard has to remind himself to breathe when he realizes this.

Pela writes down every name the two of them can come up with. Lists and lists of names and groups and anyone they can think of who might be an ally in all of this. They memorize every bit of it, make their plans of who to talk to and when. Gepard watches the sparks reflect off Pela's glasses as they burn the evidence together.

Pela finally leaves, far too late to make it home, but says she wants to stay in the restricted zone anyway to investigate. Gepard watches her make her way in the direction of Dunn's tent, watches her back until she's out of his sight and squashes down the urge to follow and keep an eye on her. His tent feels empty.

In the morning, Gepard is up before the wake up bells. He drags himself out of bed, leads his soldiers through their morning training. The same people gravitate to each other everyday. Friend groups and training partners. There's an ongoing rivalry between a few squadrons that everyone bets on. Some of them have lockets around their necks, keepsakes, mementos. Some of them wear wedding rings.

Gepard is suddenly, painfully aware of something acidic clawing at the inside of his throat, of a heavy weight low in his chest that blooms, takes up room until it threatens to spread his ribs. His mouth tastes of bile and blood.

He rearranges the schedules. Puts himself down for every open patrol into the Fragmentum, makes sure he'll be on the frontlines every single time Cocolia visits.

He only hopes that it's enough.