#bc I can't handle that
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throwing up, screaming, crying. y'all send good vibes tomorrow. pray if you do that. idk idk idk.
#vent#personal#I'm going to the cancer doctors with my mom and we should get the final answer#and if she has something I... genuinely will prob not be coming back on here for a good fucking while#bc I can't handle that#and I'll prob lose my mind#but being strong for her. y'all are the only ones who get to see me freaking out#I've never been more fucking scared
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I NEED Loop to be further tormented by finding out confessing to their party doesn't break their loops, and Siffrin wishes to see Loop again so hard he pops out of the favor tree so he gets to be Loop's guide
#isat#isat spoilers#siffrin#loop#I imagine Loop's lack of physical power is the first red herring they get#so Siffrin finds a way to break away from the favor tree and they try the tag-in tag-out AU where Sif handles the fighting#but just exploding the king isn't it either!#and Siffrin got a bit more Character Development so he's the one to be like okay no we HAVE to try talking to the party#which leads to way too many loops where they're just like 'yes yes there's two of us. calm down this is timeloop 101. keep up'#Isa: YOU CAN'T JUST EXPECT US TO ACCEPT THAT?#Loop: oh yeah cause this is SUCH an imposition for you. two of me. like this isn't straight out of your wet dreams#the party: ?!?!???!?!?!#Siffrin: LOOP#Loop: ugh I know I know. banana time#u can tag as ship idc I do think they get frustrated a bunch of loops and make out about it so like#not too many times tho bc I CANNOT bear making this adventure the same level of suffering. cannot stress enough how this would be like#80% silly 20% angst#zilly art#in stars and time
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truly a feast for all of the senses
#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age fanart#dragon age#lucanis dellamorte#davrin datv#rook datv#davrin x lucanis x rook#davrin x lucanis#rook x lucanis#Marisol de Riva#disaster bisexuals truly#but also if lucanis could read their minds he'd probably stab both of them#once again just had a stupid thought and had to draw it#i was torn between it being Neve or Davrin with Rook but went for Davrin bc in the end#i ship Bellara and Neve and Neve and Davrin more than Lucanis and Neve lololol#the shoujo sparkles are probably too cluttered but i still just had a bunch of fun hahahahah#once again doin an upload at 1 in the morning because i can't handle waiting lmao
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on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.
Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.
Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.
Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.
There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.
#svsss#luo binghe#svsss au#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#disciple shen yuan#lbh. visibly exhausted and with twitchy eyes: im fine :) | everyone else: ho no the fuck you ARENT.#SQQ was hysterical not because he found out LBH was half-demon but bc he was having a long-awaited mental breakdown over his autonomy :)#or (limited) lack thereof. he was having a sudden onset crisis of mortality and was handling at quite literally the WORST time. oops#im thinking very hard that LBH would never push his disciple into the abyss especially with no system to force him to. so SQQ either#had to goad him into it (failing always) or throw himself in. he ended up doing it himself but not before some very impressive hysterics.#BUT ALSO. IF THIS HAD BEEN WHERE SQQ WAS THE HALF-HEAVENLY DEMON INSTEAD IT WOULD'VE BEEN SO GREAT.#and by great i mean horribly angsty bc SQQ is NOT doing too hot and has. in very SY-like fashion. convinced himself that LBH will kill him#when he finds out he's a demon. so when it comes out i have this mental image of him lunging at LBH and LBH flinches back. but SQQ wraps hi#hands around the blade of Zheng Yang and yanks it up so the tip of the blade is digging into his chest where is heart is. LBH can't yank th#sword away without risking slicing into SQQ's hands. SQQ's hair has fallen out of its tail/bun and is now messily spilling down his#back and its NO helping the kinda deranged look he has going on. he's visibly shaking and his eyes keep flittering away and back at LBH's#face. SQQ is looking at the messages from the system warning him that he has to go into the abyss or punishment will occur. he's like.#rambling though. talking about how shizun doesn't *like* unclean things and there is nothing more unclean than a demon. like he is#INSISTING. LBH can't?? get a fucking word in. actually. SY isn't listening that much either anyways. too overwhelmed with the system and#the amount of stress he's under and his crumbling mental state and the innate and primal desire to live even when he's standing in front of#his own executioner. it all ends with him sitting on the ground at the lip of the abyss with his hair falling in his face. he looks so#unkempt and fallen apart and so distinctly *non-Shen Qingqiu* that LBH feels physically ill over it. tears are streaming down SQQ's face#and despite everything he is smiling. its not a nice smile. its a very frayed falling apart at the seams about to crack smile.#he tells shizun not to worry about staining his blade with this disciple's filthy blood because this disciple will take care of it himself.#and then he falls into the abyss before luo binghe can so much as grab him. the only reason LBh doesn't literally jump in after him is bc#he was numb with shock and the abyss was already closed before he could feel his legs again :]
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❝This is your only chance, Ai'Mook.❞
CHANYA AMARIT as VIVI and AYA ORAPAN as KAIMOOK episode 8 of LOVE SEA
#chanya amarit#aya orapan#love sea#love sea the series#vimook#vivi x mook#thai bl#wlw#loveseaedit#asianlgbtqdramas#th: love sea#girls love#thai gl#asian gl#bibi gifs#i have three versions of this same take#i used lossy for the first time in one of these#and also listen i see people are not pleased about the development of vimook tbh kind of wish their problems were resolved sooner#HOWEVER#this is by not even 20% as toxic as most bls couples#and people love a toxic bl pairing but suddenly bc it's two women some people can't handle that#mook deserves better? she does#i want vi to talk her feelings out? YES and she probably will if my hunch is right#but wanting a sunshine and rainbows couple just bc they are wlw is boring i want the yearning and the suffering it's what makes it fun#it's the best part actually
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“—and the love you are made of.” (and I love you because you are love)
@lovesick-x-prince what if i cried. HUH.
[the thing causing big emotion]
#I am still sick but this WOKE me from my GRAVE#“double wedding” they say like I'm supposed to stay completely normal about that#and @ you!! YOUUU!! the vows. the VOWS. them referencing the poem. grian's version. nay PROCLAMATION. the CHALLENGE#I NEED to BITE SOMETHING /vpos#no i have not read past this point in the chapter bc i know the end'll emotionally destroy me and i can't handle that rn ha h#but my god#trafficshipping#desert duo#scarian#third life#grian#goodtimeswithscar#no i cannot stop thinking about the vows#this is now canon to me with how marriage ceremonies work in the nebulous worlds of mc#i mean. refrencing the end poem like that??? and seemingly subconsciously too?? GENIOUS#i am going to return to my grave now adios>>#cau's art
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looking back on a crime scene that he created
#edward elric#fullmetal alchemist#color study#photoshop#bro fuck photoshop and fuck my computer bc I don't run anything but the internet and ps on this rickety thing and it still can't handle it#fma03#fma#fmab#I'm SORRY he always ends up cuter than I intend#he was supposed to look annoyed but he just looks small and sad sawree#fan art#art#this pose is not my fave at all but. whatever
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space sweepers but they're delivery people and are at no point on screen through the entire movie
#fantasy high#riz gukgak#kristen applebees#gorgug thistlespring#adaine abernant#fabian seacaster#figueroth faeth#the bad kids#half tempted to say these names are forum handles they use so much it pretty much became their professional names lol#I keep them teenagers bc its funnier that way#no real lore I just like drawing this. but I do think abt how theyre all weirdos too also bc thats funny to me#riz is a huge conspiracyhead who does everything by hands. he has a casio fx-570 in mint condition. nobody knows how he's maintaining it#he is nonetheless Really Good at his job. which somewhat tracks bc it's a job that requires keeping up with interstation conflicts#and new policies and an obsessive amount of planning. but he is Too Good at it. and also he dresses like that#kristen has the atomic engine that theoretically lets her unmake and remake matters with her mind. but it consumes a huge amount#of energy so it's mostly useless. she's still a cult survivor also#gorgug lives his entire life on a ship with his parents who quit a cushy deal maintaining a space station bc he wouldn't be allowed on#the low gravity let him grow very tall but also his oxygen saturation is pretty bad so he's got breathing support#fig is a robot who just found out she's a robot like two months ago. she's been assuming everyone's a robot like her and she's been feeling#very betrayed by her mom lying about that part. she's on a body mod spree which is rough bc system-specific parts are expensive#and so is adapting random parts to her system#fabian's still a pirate captain's son. can't say anything that'd be able to get the vibes across clearer than that#adaine went to tech/business school. she put her monthly allowance towards an ecoterrorist group in her academy which turned out to be an o#and she's currently wanted by UTS. more than fabian. which makes him slightly mad#she's also acquired a passion for low-tech weaponry on the way. she likes ice picks and cleavers#I think up all of this for no reason except that once again the idea of all these people being 1/teens and 2/on the same ship to be posties#is hilarious to me. esp. if they were in a forum group chat beforehand
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scenes that make me wanna eat drywall dust
#qkdraws#id in alt#haikyuu#kageyama tobio#hinata shouyou#tumblr can't even handle 4k images i had to compress this one. smh#did some layer fuckery to get the motion blur to work. the screenshots of this fuckery r kinda silly#this bitch rly is pieced together like a puzzle. kageyama himself is like.sliced in twain.#twain.that's a fun word#i've learned from past projects that blurring specific parts of an image is more complicated than just pressing the blur button#example: the blurring around lumen's hands in that suncaster pic of them all lying down in the grass#(i recognize a lot of people who will see this will see it in the haikyuu tag and have no idea who that is.roll w it)#the edges of her hands r still sharp in that image bc <3 i did it wrong<3#idk how to explain it but like#if u don't Also draw what's underneath whatever ur blurring it will not look right#especially if all ur colors r neatly snuggled up together and not overlapping (which i tend to snuggle them instead of overlap)#then the colors ur blurring have an empty Canvas Color beneath them that pokes out#this is prolly common knowledge to most people. in retrospect it seems like common sense. however (doesn't elaborate)
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Henlo
Proof of life with a backlog of Vani from 2022 feat old nickname bc why not bdjd
These days (outside of hyperfixating on different media) I have been just doodling and because of them being just sketches, I may or may not show later, so for now I thought in sharing some other stuff
#Vanitas#Kingdom hearts#Kh#Vanitas kh#artist on tumblr#Digital art#Fanart#My art#Archive log#Works log#I have shared sketches art and cosplay should I also share photography?#I have a lot of stuff I never shared bc “u should have different accs” but my brain can't handle it (I TRIED) I even have a hard time just#Sharing it in a lot of socials so I refuse to share in different accounts kwhrje I'll just make a mess. It's my corner after all right?#I wanna be seen as a person not a corporation or a machine... so It could be ok... also I may try to at last fuse#Different creative stuff to feel it less weird or unconnected hmm yea it sounds nice. Like u know collages or drawing over photos
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yeah yeah swap spit with that freaky nerd with the substance abuse metaphor
#fiddlestan#i love them#they are both freaks#also i just love stanley a lot#i can't handle fiddlestan fics where fidds just projects ford onto stan bc i get SAD for him#my poor princess don't worry fiddleford will choose you in MY ideas#get their middle aged man on#thirsty thirties#my art#fanart#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart
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does anyone else also experience like, horrible caffeine intolerance..........i made the grave mistake of 'wanting to drink a nice cup of milk tea' and now im suffering the consequences (incurable migraine). typing this while coughing blood like a sickly victorian child who has just contracted smallpox
#text#i need to know im not alone in this#i forgor tea is also caffeine...#i can't even handle moderately strong teas GOD#painkillers don't work too😁awesome#if i drink coffee the migraine is instantaneous so i know i fucked up#not that i ever drink coffee to begin with bc of this#i was lulled into a false sense of security by delicious thai milk tea...........................#i used to take painkillers for cramps but it would just transfer my cramps into a headache#and i figured out IT WAS BECAUSE IT HAD CAFFEINE#i know its bc caffeine is analgesic but goddamn#if ur reading this and you can process caffeine normally. pls be thankful#when im sleepy i just have to make it through sheer will and determination
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ouh? mod appreciation time? okay so your writing is phenomenal and it has heavily inspired my own writing. whenever i analyze its themes and ideas, i can trace a lot of it back to you :)
oh and i discovered tpoh as a young teen. i was terribly afraid of the dark and always slept with a flashlight on hand. however, that one scene where rgb helped hero be not afraid of the dark helped me get over my fear :D
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Me, waking up this morning, having completely forgotten about the new Ghost song dropping, watching the music video: "...Is four in the morning too early to be Satanized? Should I have coffee first? Surely coffee first..."
#lamp rambles#shitghosting#nameless ghouls#ghost band#the band ghost#ghost bc#funny how I was joking with my brother about becoming a nun if I can't handle the next month at work#it was coffee first
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✨ Triple Baka Solver and CinnaNmoroll ! ✨
#monigotesfeos#murder drones#murder drones fanart#murder drones uzi#uzi doorman#murder drones doll#md doll#murder drones cyn#md cyn#murder drones n#serial designation n#ok#I know the girls' “costumes” are missing a lot of details but#they are TOO MANY and my little brain can't handle it#and Cinnamoroll N bc WHYNOT#thanks to my friend for supporting the idea
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"Louis and Armand were still in love in Dubai!!" "Louis and Armand never loved each other!!" - no. it's worse. they were on the precipice of something good, but Armand couldn't recognize that, so he ruined everything they had, right when Louis had actually come to love him. the love was there for a fleeting moment and it was ruined irreversibly, never to return, even after decades they'd spent together out of desperation and spite. it's worse and that's the point
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#amc iwtv#louis de pointe du lac#the vampire armand#like. i don't understand how anyone would buy into one story or the other#when it's so very clear what the truth actually is#armand could've had everything he'd ever wanted#and he destroyed it all himself because he is a coward. everything he does is out of cowardice or desperation or impulse#he doesn't really scheme. he just reacts. and half the time it's with lies and manipulations#because he's Scared. he's still so deeply hurt. he's so lonely. and he could not bring himself to trust Louis#even though he couldn't resist developing that relationship either#your honour he is traumatized and stupid#i love him#i think there's also a primary audience reason why some people are so averse to the truth of their relationship#it's bc a lot of people don't like/can't handle the idea of love being both real and temporary#as well as something that can be destroyed so completely
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