#bare with me and my lack of posts
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Y’all I haven’t posted anything in months I’m so sorry
I made this comic months ago but I had like major art block and I didn’t like the way it turned out, but I found it again and maybe it’s not so bad
Based on how me and my brother argue about which way the ketchup bottle should be. Leo’s the right one.
Actually.. vote on it
#rottmnt#tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#art#rise tmnt#bare with me and my lack of posts#trying to adjust to adult life and changes#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#save rise of the tmnt#rise michelangelo#turtle tots#tots#rottmnt tots#rise donnie#rise leo#master splinter#rise splinter#ketchup bottle debate
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mutual orbit
#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#ff14#final fantasy 14#the azim steppe#azim steppe#au ra#xaela#magnai oronir#midlander#hyur#magnai oronir x warrior of light#gpose#wolship#warrior of light#ieeha de verral#ieeha#magnieeha#dont think ive posted them here#im generally a bit self conscious given the numerous amounts of AUs and ships with some overlap here and there#borderline confusing even for me#but feels weird NOT having posted these two given how long ive shipped them in general#love me my bisexual fail king magnai#for context here btw: basically they started butting heads like crazy first meeting. ieeha lacks any respect to speak of irt authority#which obviously magnai bristled at. but as ieeha and the gang stays at the dawn throne for a while he and magnai are forced to interact#where they bicker and argue AND also get to know each other better. ieeha learns a lot about the oronir from him and helps out everywhere#and he gets to know the tribesmen personally as he helps with healing cooking childcare etc. which magnai starts spying on#magnai feels super weird about the whole thing. its good and annoying and confusing and thrilling at the same time and hes getting agitated#and so magnai cant stand looking at him in the end and sends him and gosetsu away. he can barely look at ieeha and its making him lash out#which weirds ieeha out a lot. he thought they were making some progress to at least being civil with each other and hes a little hurt tbh
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“Studies of Elizabeth Woodville […] have been hampered by the continuing fascination with her brother-in-law, Richard III. The Ricardian [and Yorkist] apologetic is now largely dependent upon the argument that the Woodville family posed such a threat to Richard of Gloucester, and the kingdom as a whole, that Gloucester had little option but to take the throne from his Woodville-dominated nephew. Although this argument has [irregularly] been contested, a reassessment of the queen's role in 1483 has not yet been attempted. Michael Bennett, in his 1987 account [...] still dismissed her as `an inveterate intriguer, capable in her vanity and fecklessness of some remarkable shifts and turns'. But more often she is scarcely mentioned in general histories of the period.”
-J.L. Laynesmith, “English Queenship 1445-1503” (thesis for the degree of DPhil in Medieval Studies, University of York, Centre for Medieval Studies, April 1999)
#Every single thing in this remains as true in 2024 as it did when she published it in 1999 btw#historicwomendaily#elizabeth woodville#wars of the roses#my post#Ironically Laynesmith herself is guilty of the same thing: her 'reassessments' of Elizabeth's role are really bad and always favor Richard#(so I don't know how she can call them 'reassessments')#also Laynesmith seems to think that the anti-Woodville argument has been 'repeatedly contested'#I would love to see those arguments because frankly from what I've seen (and I've searched A LOT) they are entirely non-existent#even historians like Rosemary Horrox who analyze Richard III critically retain a very negative and equally condemning view of the Woodville#throughout it all - so I am not sure that counts lol#That being said I'm really glad that Laynesmith pointed out how Elizabeth “is scarcely mentioned in general histories of the period”#because it's absolutely true#Like I said before - even in traditionally negative narratives there is very lacking interest in Elizabeth as a historical figure#She's only relevant for marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard#Most historians barely pay attention to her beyond that#The thing about Elizabeth is that she really has the worst of both worlds - she's vilified and diminished in equal measure#This has a lot to do with her brand of vilification; the persistent need to reaffirm Richard of Gloucester's appeal and authority;#and the very specific anomalous place she occupies in this period of time (between the three dynasties)#In the so-called 'era of queenship studies' where other controversial queens like Eleanor of Aquitaine Isabella of France and#MoA were receiving a great deal of attention and reassessments - Elizabeth remained equally vilified but was also#ultimately still dismissed as someone who 'grounded her queenship in her carnality' (with Edward IV) :/#So when recent 'revisionist' reassessments have depowered her still further...not only are they singularly unhelpful and inaccurate#they are also actively contributing to a major element of her negative historiography that has literally been present across centuries#hence why they annoy me so much#(This is also why Elizabeth is often written as a hysteric with haphazard and incoherent motivations in historical novels btw#It's a direct result of the vilification + diminishment combination that's been so persistent with her)
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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Very few people bothered to find out what S1 Izzy / complex Edward enjoyers were interpreting differently than the "Izzy is Kylo Ren / Ed's his victim" crowd that made us like him in the first place, so it figures that now very few people are bothering to understand what a lot of us are criticizing in S2 while the - shockingly - exact same crowd leads the discussion on how it was a beautiful season and Izzy enjoyers are just incapable of decentering their problematic fave.
And it's once again leading to a barrage of posts lecturing us about why the takes they imagine we hold are wrong and supporting the same toxic fandom atmosphere that aimed to harass us all out for a year and a half. Cool. Glad to see no lessons were learned whatsoever.
Only difference is now we actually might leave, on account of you don't generally put up with extended harassment to support a show you don't even think is being written well. 🤷♀️
#it does make sense that the people who liked the aesthetic of S1 and then just wholly made up the underlying story they loved#are jumping to defend a s2 that gives them the look of relationship development - kisses! sex! - but we're criticizing as lacking story lol#like maybe my media literacy is not the problem when you just decide the story is clearly conveying what you want it to 🤷♀️#like i have seen a few izzy enjoyers who also are having fun with it or choosing the most 'benefit of the doubt' reads and good for you all#but i also noticed that S2 has struggled to trend near as much as S1 despite the audience jumping to watch immediately so like.#maybe that says something#our flag means death#ofmd s2#ofmd harassment#this fandom is so fucking toxic#(an insulting post crossing my dash TWICE from two different barely ofmd bloggers during destiel day really ticked me off)#ladyluscinia
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Something I really especially love about btas is that every character is just… a human. Batman doesn't just show up and incapacitate 30 people no issue, he has to fight and brawl with just 1 or 2 henchmen. He can be taken out by hits and poisons and such. The rogues have to surrender when the cops get guns to their faces, and can be overpowered even by normal people. Joker isn't some pure evil incarnation of the Devil or whatever, he's just… a really bad man. Same for every other villain and character. And Bruce actually gets to show personality and emotion beyond Brooking and Grunting. He makes jokes and laughs and gets sad.
I'm really getting to understand why people call this the best Batman adaptation.
#my dc posting#batman#btas#batman the animated series#im not done w it and not even watching it in any particular order#but im currently watching Trial and the rogues are just 👌so peak#''could batman beat superman'' my brother in christ what the fuck are you talking about. he mainly fights like regular ass gangsters and sh#t that's not his natural habitat!!!#like idk when reading comics or fanfic its like. they dont feel grounded in reality anymore#but in btas the movement!!! the fucking movement and timing and lack of embellishment or sometimes even ost!!!#like yeah these are just some ppl in costumes duking it out!! goddd this show is so peak why cant everything be like this#im so tired of modern batman. mr 'i show no emotion ever complete control freak beat my kids' is not my guy!!!#also harley fucks so severely. just all the rogues. they are so horrible and toxic and nothing makes me happier than watching them do fucke#shit#yknow???#this show does apparently then later on commit the unforgivable sin of skipping jason todd in favour of tim#just like young justice#so i'm never gonna watch those seasons/shows#bc jason's my robin and i barely tolerate any other. which sucks bc nobody is interested in putting him in one of these cartoons!!!#shut the fuck up abt tv shows and live action adaptations who cares?? i hate actors and irl shit!!! animate my boy nnnNOW!!
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I miss being younger and believing the queer community was actually a safe space
#turns out white queers hate poc just as much as literally every other white person ever 💔#big bummer for young me man I feel like the part of me that still believed in people being inherently good broke a little more that day#That sounds super dramatic but it's true in a way#hard to have faith in the inherent kindness of humanity when u grow up black in a predominantly white area 💀#this just reminded me but those positivity posts that r like 'people Are kind' and then like say smth oddly profound kind of make me hopeful#but then just kind of upset#they always feel like theyre comming from a place of privilege yknow#like bro i wish strangers were nice to me out of actual kindness#and not a weird need to prove to the world that theyre not racist without actually putting in any effort to be antiracist#'hey look at me treating this black like a human being! see? im an ally! i posted black sqaures in 2020 and have blm in my bio!'#this is bc my local juneteenth festival got canceled due to lack of funding bc. yknow its been 4yrs#everyones (white ppl) moved on#they dont care anymore and they dont need to bc they alr did the bare minimum to absolve themselves of guilt#rant#ig im lucky i live in a super queer town but its so overwhelmingly white it kind if cancels that out yknow#personal#okay to reblog#if u want to ig idk#moth.txt
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Going into the search tab looking for tickle content for a certain fandom and then getting jumpscared by my own posts
#tail talk#sorry for the lack of posts recently btw lol im just really awkward at talking to people and it makes me nervous to post#OH BUT the amount of nice tags on my last post made me so happy thank u if u left tags ily ;_;#I seriously appreciate it so much because im kinda pushing myself out of my comfort zone to make atsv art#because i barely draw anything other than super stylized cartoons/legos recently LOL#bur yeah anyways#in other news 1:im sick (😢) 2: im seeing atsv again soon (😁)
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feeling cute might nuke some of my fics and leave them to die and rot forever in the deepest recesses of my mind forever forgotten due to the feeling of incompetency in my work and a touch of something lacking in my writing haha what a silly thought amirite
#mhie rambles#this is a personal thing rn so i think i might make a new tag for this#please reblog fics with tags. like genuinely this is the BARE MINIMUM if you enjoy my work#Just spam the tags from the og post n ur done. It's. That. Simple.#Likes r good likes r great!! But this isn't Insta where likes r predominantly the reason why a post prospers#SO PLEASE IF YOU LIKE MY WORK#N want to continue seeing me post more then please#reblog#leave a nice comment if you feel like it#I CANT BELIEVE I HAVE TO SAY THIS BUT THE SERIOUS LACK OF INTERACTION IN TUMBLR WJEN THERE R AMAZING FICS BEING BURIED IN THE DUST IS#devastating.#i shuld rlly get a new tag for this#Will delete ltr
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Their friendship is actually so special to me,.,,, fucked up bug and her Little Guy friend who may or may not be a fucking parasite. They make me go insane
#not rw#ava ocs#ava oc#avm oc#avm ocs#Sketch Tag#Circe Tag#ok theres the sorting tags out. its Sketch and Circe 2 of my stick ocs!!!!!#they're so cool. im working on a whole fucking essay of a post for Circe since she won the poll#sketch was actually the weird little fucking Anomaly who kisses demigods. he's best friends with this cynical bug#they would Kill for eachother. sketch actualy ends up doing so for circe's sake. so.#their friendship is so special to me bc. sketch is confused by the fact everyone finds his lack of fur and general build unnerving#and thus thinks something is wrong with him on a Fundamental level.#meanwhile circe has issues because her own creator/mother said she'd be worthless if she ever left her home.#and then when they barely manage to escape fucking -death-#full on getting half of their entire being corrupted and split into a Separate Entity.#they still cant get over the ingrained idea that shes utterly worthless because shes left the pc. so circe is Destructive and Violent.#with her two siblings (dark and chosen lmao. dark found circe in a dumpster and was like “hey can we keep this thing it looks funny”).#ALSO circe has Chronic Pain Shit goin on. hacks up black gunk every morning and cant fly for long periods of time bc#the exertion makes her joint aches unbearable.#they're best friends. mlm and wlw solidarity but they're both bisexual
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Find it very interesting that Chai is labeled as a slacker and is on paper having no prior work experience + is called an idiot on several occasions + is stated to be a college dropout
And somehow he managed to get into college in the first place
I'm going to be contrarian and say this man actually had a scholarship but struggled with certain aspects of academia, consequently losing the funding he needed and forcing him to struggle to find a career with no credentials and no experience
#mel talks hi fi rush#you can find ways to get through school by doing the bare minimum#and with how Chai is I'm willing to bet he saddled up a bunch of extracurriculars that helped him qualify#for said scholarships#I would even goes as far to say he is fully capable of studying things he has interest in but#lacked a support network to assist with things he struggled with#and who is to say he didn't do odd jobs or run errands to get enough to survive#but had no idea how to put that in a resume#the beacon (original intro song / streamer mode version) has very telling lyrics to me#also unrelated but the disability commentary is there and it leaves such an impact in my eyes#will one day make a post talking about my favorite line#edit: saw a lot of people saying it's not a serious game so Chai might have just dropped out to get said arm#which I'm not... a fan of#I could see the possibility and 100% get behind the reasoning#and still manage to make it super angsty because (vague gesture)#but this makes way more sense to me personally#gods is it apparent I have no one to infodump and discuss this game with
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I really need friends I can talk to about my ocs but I don't and also I don't even know what I'd say but I think if I had friends to talk about it with I'd learn how to talk about my ocs
#tide of consciousness#This is the only place I do it and I barely do it even to start with#God my problem is I do not talk enough at all and there's too many words in my brain and body and it's killing all my cells#Augh the fucking yearning is back I need to kill it with hammers#I want to say something like I miss when I had friends I talked about it with but hardly have ever or maybe never#And not for lack of friends it's my own fault because I never talk bc someone convinced me that no one cares#I DON'T TALK!!! I DON'T TALK ABOUT ANYTHING#This is the only place with people that I even begin to touch on the things I would want to talk about#And I don't ever actually say anything much despite all these posts#And it's never TO someone. It's close enough to human interaction that it feels like I'm accomplishing something#But even if people see it there's no one really there. No one talks back. I never say anything much anyway#I feel so broken and stupid all the time
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Do you not interact with the rgg fandom as much as you did before? I remember back then you’d tweet and reply quite a bit but now you just post art every now and then is there a specific reason?
i interact with the rgg fandom as much as i always have, i just post art less compared to the like. comic-a-day thing i had going on a while ago lol
and there's no decisive reason for that: i just dont have any rgg to post ! whenever people inbox me here though i'm fully prepared to write a 30-tag ramble in response; even if i dont post about a thing i'm always excited to talk about it :]
#snap chats#if you feel as though theres been a lack of asks as of late then its because. Theres Been A Lack Of Asks LMAO#i generally answer all asks unless its something like. tumblr eats it or its asinine but my tolerance for 'asinine' is high so lol#ive posted near every ask ive gotten for the past some years so rest assured im set to talk bout most things#i got sleeper agents for my interests anyhow even if i have a different 'main' one i can always be dragged back with a good convo#like i was talking about kiryu with my brother yesterday since we were talkin about charas with good intentions but awkward executions#and then i went into a ramble about kiryu and daigo so rveakjvkw#but on twitter /specifically/ i like. never tweeted non-art things about rgg LOL what do i hate myself#and i usually only talk to people on twitter if they reach out to me or tag me in something which. no one does 💀💀💀#i talk to some mutuals on priv though but that's always been really sparse- i dont seek out interactions i just feel awkward about it#overall im generally really secluded when it comes to interacting with fandom i like barely look in tags or look for discussions#maybe when i JUST join one but once ive like. 'moved in' so to speak i stop going in there all together unless i get really bored#its not that i GREATLY prefer being alone or anything like that. i just. post when i feel like it and thatll be that vlkeajkal#if i see anything i like on my tl or dashboard then thats like 90 thousand bonus points but otherwise Yeah
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#Don't mind me I just need to vent real quick#Ignore this post by all means#Just feeling anxious af right now#Have barely been able to sleep the last two weeks#Plus I'm feeling even more I'll than usual and it just won't pass#Might be down to lack of sleep ofc#Or stress#Cuz I'm basically stressed 24/7 for no reason#Eitherway my gut keeps telling me something is seriously wrong#Like I'm seriously ill#But ofc I can't tell whether that's just anxiety#My doctor just gives me a shrug whenever I show up there#And getting a therapist in this economy is almost impossible#They don't even put you on waiting lists anymore cuz they're just too long#I wouldn't even know which type of therapy to go for anymore#Cuz my diagnoses are a giant cluster fuck and I don't know what to tackle first#It's just a tad bit overwhelming at times#Sorry#Needed to let this out somewhere real quick#Illness tw#Mental illness tw#nonsims#saviorhide
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i only came here to compliment yves at first but now im laugh crying at the braincell hot potato between daisuke and dark that i was JUST thinking about all morning
#*･ﾟ⊰ 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐒. ⊱ ✦ › OUT.#before lain even tagged me i literally had a post in my drafts#that was straight up just like 'dark is so smart but so stupid'#<- guy who picks all the +4 braincell options but truly. legitimately. only has one single precious shiny braincell#like a quarter#to daisuke's half-eaten potato chip braincell#jabwjjkjjgkjfjkj#PLEASE. little lotte is thinking of everything and nothing out here#dai nearly dies like 3 times then just forgets abt the fact. doesnt even bring it up again. moves on.com#but with barely any processing. dai at all times is just coasting. 'wow that was weird. that happened ig. anyways-'#OK. SWEATS. YELLS#idk if ill write anyth tonight im sooo lacking on sleep and i was busy today... still am busy#consider things more on the probably not writing end. im going to sleep so soon i bet
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people claim to understand that progress isn't linear and recovery can take a long time until it becomes personally inconvenient to them and then you're just a stupid lazy bastard to them no matter how you behaved before you became outwardly sick or how hard you've been trying to get better. and i will be mad about that forever
#text post#vent#venting#vent post#chronic illness#mental illness#progress is not linear#recovery takes time#ive only been diagnosed and trying treatments for my autoimmune disease for 1yr#ive been sick for closer to 5#i just got covid for the second time in january and its fucked up all the progress#that i was making#and now rather than try to support me through a major setback#everyone is acting like i just dont have my shut together and im not trying#meanwhile i am doing my best to keep up when walking a single flight of stairs is still hard for me#and there are very few people who meaningfully recognize how hard this is for me#i used to work three jobs while going to school full time seeing my family frequently#AND having a social life and maintaining my ltr#now im married yeah but i only do one wfm full time job barely engage with my hobbies#see my family and friends infrequently and tbh barely leave my house#and its not for any lack of wanting to#its because i CANT#and even fewer people are making am efforts to accommodate me#so i force myself to occasionally go out and see people#and then need to recover for two weeks#and they dont even appreciate how HARD it is#so much of the effort disabled put into their interactions with abled or just differently#disabled loved ones goes completely unnoticed because its expected as the bare minimum another can do#but rhe bare minimum to them is the absolute best you yourself can give#and nobody cares
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