#bad sex ed

[lady-asbestos]

so back in junior high in my repressive, mormon-ass town, I had to take a health class whose sex ed section was essentially “sex is only there for reproduction, queer people don’t exist, contraception doesn’t exist, and if you ever have sex before marriage you’ll explode at the speed of light”. then they gave us this slip where if we signed our name promising to never have sex before marriage we could get a free pizza from dominos, and I just kind of laughed a bit and then signed it because free fucking pizza and like what were they gonna do?

flash forward to now. it’s been like 10 years. i’ve since realized I’m ace. i’ve transed my gender. i’m just generally full of gay. anyways, a memory of that stupid little no-sex coupon i signed popped into my head out of nowhere  and i realized that i have 100% earned that free pizza i got when i was like 13. and you know, i’m sure that this is just exactly what those repressive ultra-mormon curriculum writers had in mind when they made that a part of their repressive sex ed classs.

[owlkhemy]

The Fun of School: Prefixes Edition!

I like to think I am smart. It's. A lie. But anyway, I had some classmates who weren't quite as smart as me. And thus I have memories of that.

In this case, classmates pulling a dumb with prefixes.

The "Sex" "Ed"

Even though it was literally supposed to be mandated in our curriculum, my middle school teachers tended to skimp out on sex ed. (I went to school in rural Canada.) So when we were supposed to have learned stuff in grade seven, we didn't. That led to the grade eight sex ed, aka "One Sentence About Types of Sex and One Month On How To Avoid STIs, and Also Different Sexual Orientations I Guess".

For the record, I realized I was aspec in grade eight. So I already knew a tiny bit about stuff. Particularly what the prefixes of orientations meant. Stuff like "homo-", "hetero-", "bi-", "a-", "pan-", you know.

The teacher told us to try and match the orientation to a prefix. I aced that in my head, pun fully intended, but the rest of my group did not. I remember a conversation like this:

Group: *discussing which one asexual is*

Me: "A" is not at all.

Group: *completely ignores me to keep discussing, for some reason I feel like they might have mixed up pan and ace?*

The Geography Incident

Our amazing geography teacher in ninth grade asked us what "trans" meant, in the sense of "Trans-Canada Highway".

Nobody answered.

The teacher said "It means 'across'."

Cue someone in the back of class being like "Oh, that's what you meant."

The Science Class Incident(s)

The classic mistake, taking the "homo" in Homo sapiens to mean the "homo" in homosexual. That was grade nine. (The first one is Latin for "man", and the second one is Greek for "same". Gay people are not exclusively "man-sexual", nor are humans "wise sames".)

There was another one in grade twelve when our chemistry teacher actually used the example of cis and transgender to make a note of how to remember cis and trans fats (in a respectful way, mind you, she was using them as their meanings of "on same side" and "on different side" essentially).

I fully expect my classmates to have misinterpreted though so I made a thing

Anyway

That's all for this. Just remember guys, prefixes mean stuff! And if you associate a prefix with certain things, don't, because if it's in another word it just means what it means, not that there's a relationship between the things.

Note: I actually find these incidents to be really funny in hindsight, and I don't mean to attack anyone who thought similar things. Everyone does it! Never feel bad about learning things, because without learning things, how would we know that trans fats aren't trans? We wouldn't.

Have a good day y'all!

[fixing-bad-posts]

Lol Children can know and learn about sex. It's why sex ed is in SCHOOL and We absolutely should have it. And you're sick if you think otherwise. love you.

[ambertoadlet]

same

I got haunted by a blue disembodied penis.

[bougiebutchbinch]

AND AND AND. If I may. NO dynamic is more delicious to me than Ed being a very switchy guy who likes to try ALL things, in contrast to Izzy being a very fixed-in-his-ways subby bottom who is nevertheless determined to make his captain happy

which is to say Ed gets really fucking bored of any dynamic after about a week. which is to say they switch it up a lot in the pre-stede era, only it absolutely sucks because Ed has to talk Izzy through it step-by-step and Izzy just is kinda ass at taking initiative, because he wants to be ordered around so very badly slkdfgklsdhgsd

cue Ed sighing and telling Izzy he's 'impossible' and 'it's like pulling teeth with you, mate', which OBVIOUSLY Izzy takes incredibly badly and cries about later in the privacy of his own cabin while flagellating himself literally and figuratively for his Failure to be The Man his captain Needs Him To Be, etc.

and everything is kinda sad and sour until Stede McHorseCock Bonnet swaggers bow-legged into their life and gives them a much needed third wheel on their Reliant Robin

[itsbait]

if you write ed nashton/the riddler as an aggressive, confident dom thats experienced (somehow) and actually knows what hes doing and calls the reader shit like "baby" You are going to super hell. he is not strumming your clit like a harpist at the london philharmonic orchestra he is sweating through his excessive layers the second you get a hand on him and ejaculating in his pants and finding a way to blame you for it so he doesnt die of embarassment from being the clammy involuntary celibate virgin loser that he is. You do not fuck with him like i do. Poser.

[this-world-of-beautiful-monsters]

if you look at it through smudgy/rosecolored glasses long enough the 1x8 dinner scene is really just helaegon trying very hard and absolutely failing to talk jacela into a foursome.

[volo-thereforeiam]

What a way to turn real scientific facts into an anti-men rhetoric. While it's true, one need to be pregnant with the same person a ton before they turn "ugly" or "beautiful", which most of the time relative to each individuals anyway (i.e. fat lips don't look good on everyone, so does button nose). And even then, most of the worry that comes with this phenomenon is the pregnant individual getting more prone to certain illnesses like autoimmune disorders. Not something as shallow as outward appearance.

No, keeping the body count low don't help nor worsen the situation. The sperms alone don't alter someone's genetic code. The foetus does, because the cell transfer happened between the pregnant person and their foetus. So unless they're pregnant with the sex partner, the sex partner's DNA has no other way to affect theirs. Of all the reasons to not have sex, this is by far one of the weakest.

Also, misogynist DNA? By that logic at some point in time all humans on earth will be misogynist because as we already established, men's DNA can be absorbed by women via the foetus; and passed on to the children, girls or boys. And if anyone believe that misogyny is a product of nature instead of nurture, why do anything to spread the idea of feminism? Unless it's as extreme as termination of all humans, anything we do to fight misogyny is useless because the idea of misogyny is imprinted on the DNA.

This is why i keep my body count low, maybe the stereotype of women going crazy and becoming misogynists after you become a whore is true. Im not a virtuous person hut ive always felt like the girls who fuck hoards of dudes slowly become women haters who can only be friends with other dudes and i think this could actually provide some scientific evidence to back up my thoery. Theyve absorbed too much misogynist dna. Dont let anyone raw dog you and dont let ‘m finish in you, you might become a misogynist. Careful who u breed with!

[fangedfcker]

vampire sub x priest dom who keeps "accidentally" burning them with the crucifix on their rosary...

anon I like your mind.

being marked up, knowing if I move or flinch away I'd make it worse.

being bent over a pew with them behind me, leaning over so it brushes my back, pushing me down and leaning further in the closer they get so the crucifix rests on my back, and I know the only way to get it away is to get them off.

sitting chest to chest on their lap, crucifix just happening to be pressed to where my heart is but they won't let me go or pull away. maybe even play dumb about what's burning me. or just soothe me and tell me I'm being so good when I cling to them and plead for mercy.

[cowchickenbeefpork]

tbh I don’t even ship edlee in a traditional way like no these two don’t have any romantic or maybe even sexual attraction to eachother but do you know what they do have? Desperation. They are desperate and lonely let me cook let me cook

[heavencasteel420]

I just really like the idea of Steve showing up at the Byers house in the aftermath of S1 and announcing his fear that Jonathan has gotten Pregnant by the Demogorgon (because it drooled in his mouth). And at first Jonathan is like “is this a new form of bullying or do you need to go to the hospital” and Nancy (who is also there) is like “please, Steve, we’re really busy trying to figure out how to deal with the rumors you accidentally spread about me and Jonathan worshiping the devil, plus the rumors Jonathan accidentally spread about someone in this house having a baby.” But it’s been such a weird week and Steve is so genuinely agitated that five minutes later Jonathan is all “holy shit I cannot have a baby right now, there’s too much going ON” and Nancy is earnestly debating Steve about whether they do alternate-dimension abortions on cis dudes in Indianapolis or whether that’s more of a Chicago thing or maybe the Lab can just abort that thang?

[rainandsugarcane2000]

sure they "teach about consent" in sex ed but when have they ever taught you how to say no? and that it okay to just say no. you can say no.

but seriously why dont they teach you how to say no?? what if im making out with someone and i just wanna kiss them and cuddle and stuff and they start getting handsy and i dont want it? they dont teach you how to say no in sex ed. in that situation i wouldnt even know what to do and i would continue to let it happen even if i didnt want it. they need to teach actual good sex ed. "its not appropriate to teach that stuff!!" okay so you want your kids to get sexually assulted? or hurt themselves by not properly taking care of personal toys? or get sick because theyre doing something dangerous? why is it not appropriate huh? nobody is jacking off in class calm down. and teachers need to stop with the "kids shouldnt even be having sex we shouldnt teach this stuff its sexualizing the kids" or whatever bullshit, we arent freaking out cuz youre teaching us about intercourse. no, you the ADULTS are unnecessarily sexualizing kids, why are you thinking like that? nobody is getting all hot and bothered cuz youre teaching us how to be safe, we were gonna fuck anyway might as well not get hurt. please do better.

[sarucane]

Why did Ed headbutt Stede?

This one is fairly straightforward in the show but also fun to rant about so here goes!

I think the short version of this answer is "because Ed had no other way to communicate FUCK OFF at that moment." Ed can't talk, doesn't seem able to move, and is very unclear on exactly what's going on and what he's doing (even a while later he has a deeply revealing conversation with a confused rabbit--he's definitely not all there in this moment). Still, Stede's wrong when he suggests it was an accident: Ed owns the action later when he yells "I'm glad it hurt, that's the point of head butts!"

That being said, it's worth taking in the context for a sec, because Ed does love Stede and there is a theoretical potential for this to go to a very dark place. Balancing the violence of the pirate world with portraying healthy relationships is quite a challenge for these writers, as it'd be easy to tip over from healthy to very unhealthy.

In the same episode, Mary gets stabbed in the back quite deeply (it's knocking on bones) and it barely bleeds, let alone hurts once it's out. Ed and Stede have both been run through with swords but since "the important bits" didn't get hit, they needed no recovery time. Hell, Ed got shot in the arm and hit in the face with a cannonball in S2E2 and he's fine by halfway through E3. A headbutt is nothing on this show, it's like a kid elbowing another kid on the bus.

Ed head butts Stede because he's angry and in emotional pain, he's a pirate and pirates (not to mention many humans) express emotions through violence, and Ed can't break a chair or smash something--so the headbutt is the only available option.

And in terms of walking that line between health and unhealthy/violent relationship: the headbutt not only does not take place while Ed and Stede are in a relationship, it is itself a way of Ed saying "WE ARE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP 'CAUSE YOU DUMPED ME FUCK OFF." When Ed is in possession of his faculties, he is still using violence to externalize emotions, but Stede is emphatically not a target of that violence.

Ed doesn't even look at Stede from the moment the anger starts rising, and he turns his back on Stede and moves to another part of the room entirely to smash shit. Not the most mature response, but consistent with Ed's character and history while also pointedly sidestepping that dangerous territory.

And Ed's anger fueling the headbutt is completely justified.

Stede and Ed are often in different emotional places within their relationship, but they're rarely as far apart as at the beginning of episode 3. Stede is acting (in fairness understandably given the near death thing) absolutely no differently than he would if they were, at that moment, in a romantic relationship (which fits with his whole "I didn't dump him, we're on a break" schtick). But Stede quite brutally broke Ed's heart, triggering a crisis that led to Ed being so convinced he's "not loveable" that he despaired of living at all.

Stede says "I thought I lost you," and the only appropriate response to that is "YOU DID," and that needs to be made clear to Stede, because there's a difference between "being on different pages in a relationship" and "being on different pages about a relationship existing." Ed is hurt, badly, and Stede's total lack of acknowledgement of that is absolutely infuriating. Like Ed says, hurt is the point of head butts: Ed was hurting and Stede wasn't, and that distance in experiences demanded a response, so Ed seized on the only one available to him.

[alectoperdita]

ok i know what i said earlier but consider the opposite happening

hacker!Seto calling hitter!Jou "daddy," maybe being a little cheeky, and Jou goes flaccid 😂

[kasumingo]

it's utterly wild how transparent people are about depicting "problematic things" in stories, because people keep repeating that it's good if it isn't romanticized but cannot define romanticization, cannot tell romanticization and depiction apart and outright shun artists and writers who clearly condemn and repeat themselves over and over again what function in the story the unpleasant themes have

[bimboficationblues]

so bewildering to me that so many straight people seemingly are not aware that if PIV is not working for whatever reason you can just do something else