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definitelynotafurinasimp · 1 year ago

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“Love is a rebellious bird that none can tame”

After everything she’s been through, falling in love was the last thing she thought she’d ever achieve. And yet, even though she thought herself completely undeserving of anyone’s feelings, she still yearned for it… Maybe you’ll be the one to grant her wish.

characters: Furina x gn!reader

words: ~6360

warnings: spoilers for the 4.2 Archon Quest and Furina’s Story Quest

a/n: So I thought “let’s write something short for Furina, probably won't take too long”, and here I am now, writing this since thursday and with a total of 12 or so pages...

Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Furina

There were many things that had changed in the life of the human once known as Fontaine’s beloved archon after the waters swept through Fontaine, engulfing the entire nation as prophesied and leaving her crying on the same chair she had sat down almost an hour before, still devastated from everything that had happened, only for the water to recede once more, leaving the city destroyed but its residents unharmed…

In those moments, Furina couldn’t imagine any of her past subjects being willing to ever look her in the eyes with anything but scorn again, considering how she had lied to them all for hundreds of years, pretending to be their Archon when she was nothing more than a normal human girl drawing nearer and nearer to unavoidable doom… She couldn’t imagine things to turn better in her personal life at all either, having been sentenced to death in front of everyone not too long ago… and yet here she was, reading through the script passed to her by the director, being asked for her opinion and recommendations the same way as when she was still putting on that horrible masquerade.

“My eyes can’t spot any glaring sins in writing in this dialogue… in other words, it’s good, as expected from someone as talented as you, director”, Furina responded once her eyes finally separated from the sheets of paper, catching herself falling back into those theatrical speech patterns she had grown so accustomed to, her lips curling into a polite smile as the director thanked her before quickly moving on to talk to another person.

It had taken Furina quite some time to return to the world of acting, and even after her appearance in the little Oceanid she tried restraining herself from diving head-first into the show-biz again and while there was barely a week she didn’t receive an invitation for a role for the next up-and-coming show, not even being asked for an interview first, acting played the second fiddle when compared to trying to get some time for herself. For centuries her every move was intensely watched, with the only hours she was truly alone being when she was asleep, so getting some time where she was free to try her hands at things in the comfort of her new home was a nice change of pace… especially since her cooking might have required some more refining.

But while Furina was finally free to live the life she always wanted… there still weren’t that many people she could call her friends. The traveler and their companion always on all sorts of adventures, while she still hesitated to reach out to her past colleagues, doubting if they even still wanted her around in the first place.

“Mhm, how could I forget I was dealing with the greatest of actors in all of Teyvat, just remember to look at the stairs the next time we’re on stage, we don’t want a repeat of last time, don’t we?”, the voice of one of her fellow actors rang out, causing Furina to look at the source of the sound, only to see a small group of her coworkers huddled around each other, joking and teasing around while rehearsing their lines and laughing at all kinds of stories of their past and inside jokes… both things still seemingly far out of reach for herself, at least for now. She didn’t like to admit it, but she felt a bit jealous.

Suddenly feeling out of place, Furina forced her eyes back onto the papers in her head, trying to read through her scenes once again, only to find her mind filled with all kinds of different thoughts.

Which sauce should I be trying today? Bolognese? Alfredo? Something new might be nice… but do I really feel like experimenting today? Maybe I should just go out to eat once in a while. It felt like a lifetime since I last visited that bakery near the city center… oh yeah, they shut down a generation ago.

Before she knew it, she sunk further and further into her thoughts, only to suddenly be startled when she felt a hand touch her shoulder, causing the culprit to follow suit.

“Oh, sorry! I was just trying to tell you that today’s rehearsal was over, but you seemed spaced out, so I thought…”, you apologized after quickly pulling your hand away, a look of slight embarrassment on your face before it quickly disappeared again, replaced by a smile that made her heart stop. For a split-second, Furina was about to refute your claim of her spacing out in public, her mouth still working on her centuries old autopilot, only for her to stop herself before a tone could come out, giving you a silent nod of her head.

But while this had ought to be it with your conversation for the day, Furina’s mouth refused to close, the realization that if she didn’t do anything about it, she was just going to go home, do the same thing she always did, eat the same meal she had… admittedly grown a bit sick off, even though she’d rather walk through hell and back before admitting to that flying companion of the traveler that they may have been somewhat right to judge her cooking skills, and get not a single step closer to finally using the chance at living the human life she had always wanted, instead just wasting her days with no meaningful connections until her time would run out quickly dawning on her.

And so, before any of her anxieties could stop her words were pouring out of her mouth once again.

“Do you have some spare time to rehearse our dialogues? I didn’t have the chance to see you in action yet, and I’d like to see if you’re worthy of acting alongside me.”

If it wasn’t for her self-control returning to her body at that exact moment, she would have facepalmed herself with enough force to leave an imprint, the cocky remark at the end a textbook example of the bad habits she still struggled getting rid off.

Surprisingly enough however, you didn’t seem insulted, nor disgusted by someone like her, who could not even do anything but watch in her nation's biggest crises, having the galls to look down on someone else. A grin that stretched from ear to ear finding itself on your face instead, your hand reaching out almost instantly as you offered her a handshake.

“Sure, Miss Furina, let me show you what I’m made of.”

Before she could think things over however, her hand had already grown a mind of its own, shaking yours as she spouted out another confident boast.

“Are you out of your mind?! What good does it do to anyone if you go and throw your life away in a pointless duel? You could have at least asked me for my opinion before challenging him out of nowhere!”, you snapped, a mixture of anger and desperation seeping through your voice as you took a step towards Furina, leaning slightly forward, only to jerk back when she did the same, almost making your foreheads collide.

“I don’t belong to you, I don’t have to ask you for permission for anything. Challenging him might not have been the right course of action, I admit that, but at least it is an action. You hear the townsfolk weep whenever he and his band of mercenaries march into the townsquare and extort them for all their worth. So I’m not going to apologize for trying to help instead of just watching from the sidelines as you love to do”, before you could manage to say another word, Furina had turned around and stamped away, completely ignoring you calling out her name before you were all one… once again.

“Well, you are quite talented, I have to admit. I can see why you were hired to play alongside me. Although you still have a long way ahead of you if you wish to get as good as me”, Furina spoke half-jokingly, she never doubted your acting skills in the first place, she had heard of how talented you were after all, but given her excuse earlier, that wasn’t exactly something she could admit.

“Thanks Miss Furina, it’s an honor to hear someone like you say that. I hope I’ll be able to improve my acting while working alongside you”, you were quick to respond, putting your hand on your chest before giving her a small bow, leaving the actress stumped by your sudden modesty.

What’s this? Where are the competitive remarks you had been spewing out during the entirety of your private rehearsal? Why are you so… modest now?

Furina’s expression must have done a great job at revealing her inner monologue as you were quick to respond.

“Is something the matter, Miss Furina?”, you asked in the same calm tone, only for her to quickly turn her head away, as she realized she had been staring.

“N-nothing”, Furina responded in a subdued manner, looking out of the window and watching the streets grow less and less populated as the sun started to set, painting the skies in colors that made her want to whip out her camera and snap a picture or two.

As the silence stretched longer however, and the colors faded from the skies, Furina was teleported back into reality when your footsteps echoed through the room, approaching the front door one step at a time, causing her to turn around to face you once again.

“Thanks a lot, Miss Furina. I’ve learned a lot today”, you stated with a small smile, your hand already touching the doorknob when Furina interrupted your exit.

“Let’s go home together, I’m not too fond of the city's alleyways once they get covered in darkness”, she suggested. The phrase “not too fond” being a bit of an understatement considering her run-in with near death all those moons ago. And yet, Furina couldn’t help but feel a bit silly for asking you to accompany her, she was an adult after all, one that didn’t have that much of a chance to live life yet, but one nonetheless. But before she had the chance to open her mouth and spout an excuse you were already holding the door open for her, gesturing her to step out first.

“And we’ve arrived”, Furina announced, stopping in her tracks so suddenly that it took you a few steps to realize she was no longer by your side, quickly turning around and seeing her proudly point at the building in front of you. It was a lot smaller than you expected, considering she was the previous Archon and still widely appreciated as an actor. The burning lights in one of its windows made it pretty clear that her apartment wasn’t the only one in the building. But it was far from shabby. It had a nice exterior, was located near the city center and only a few steps away from some major shops, a nice house all in all.

“What? Left speechless by my abode? You flatter me”, she asked theatrically once the silence grew a bit too long to be considered anything but awkward, her voice hiding the faintest hint of nervousness.

“It’s pretty, I wish I’d have a place from which everything was as quickly reachable as from here”, you responded, a polite smile making its way onto your face as Furina’s head tilted by a bit.

“Don’t you live somewhere near here?”

A shake of your head was enough to make her eyes widen, but once your response left your mouth, you saw her jaw hit the ground. “I live on the other side of the city, so it’s always a bit of a footmarch to get here.”

“I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have asked you to accompany me if I knew you’d have to march all across the city to get home afterwards”, apologies quickly started flooding out of her mouth, obviously feeling bad about her previous request, but when you simply waved her worries off, she grew silent once again.

“It’s no problem. I look forward to our next rehearsal”, you said your goodbyes, only for Furina’s voice to once again stop you in your tracks.

“Next rehearsal?”

At that exact moment, something in your brain clicked. Today was a one off thing, you had proven your worth as an acting colleague after all, so there was no reason for this to continue. The realization hit like a rock, you had enjoyed it after all, even if you had once again fallen into your old habits of becoming too boastful and competitive once your rehearsal’s started to get into motion.

“Sure, see you tomorrow!”, just as you were starting to think about breaking the silence by apologizing, her voice rang out to snap you out of it, a small smile on her face once you dared to look back up at her.

“Good work as always, Miss Furina. It really felt like I was talking to another person just now”, words of praise left your mouth in place of the line you were actually supposed to say, catching her completely off guard to the point her cheeks started to blush a bit.

"T-Thanks? Did you forget your line all of a sudden or did the script change?”, she shot back with a tease, hoping it would be enough to serve as a distraction from her face. Instead of making your eyes look away however, your stare grew more intense, to the point she was fearing she might have said something very insensitive.

“I don’t forget my lines, Miss Furina, that’s not something that happens. Scratch that, I don’t forget lines at all, I’m pretty sure I could recite your part from memory at this point”, you shot back with a big grin on your face, your competitive spirit seemingly having been reawakened.

While Furina herself liked to indulge herself in boasting about her skills from time to time, she learned that there came a time when words alone were no longer satisfactory and had to be backed up by actions, so when she heard your remark she didn’t hesitate for even a second to take you up on it, laughter escaping her mouth as she struck a confident pose.

“Heh, well then, bless me with your performance, oh great and mighty one.”

What followed was silence, as you seemed to get lost in thought, your ear-to-ear grin slowly vanishing as your face returned to normal, but once the actress was finally about to offer you a chance out, you started your monologue. One, which while only seeming slightly familiar to her at first, quickly crystallized itself as none other than her character’s from the little oceanid. And while Furina had to admit to herself that you did a pretty good job remembering it, not only knowing what to say, but also when to pause, making it appear as easy as reading it from a script, the way you tried to imitate her voice even if yours was so different from hers made the corners of her lips curl into a smile. Whether it was out of admiration or meant as a parody of her she didn’t know, what she did know however, was that she couldn’t be angry at you even if you were trying to make fun of her, simply finding herself smiling at the thought.

“So you’re either so obsessed with the idea of impressing me that you learned every single one of my lines from heart, or you’re secretly my biggest fan”, Furina joked, only to find you shooting her a smile.

“I couldn’t help it, the little oceanid was just too good for me not to watch it more than once”, you refuted her accusation, finishing the graceful bow you had tried performing before being interrupted by the person in front of you.

“Well, Miss Furina. You’ve heard my rendition of your lines, so make sure to do your homework and read some of mine. Or are you scared you wouldn’t manage it as stunningly as me”, you challenged her before quickly putting on your jacket, opening the door and holding it open until the two of you had stepped outside.

There was no rational reason for her to accept. Taking on extra work when she already had to study enough lines for the play for no other reason than to fuel your urge for competition? That sounded a bit too absurd, even for her. Especially for her.

“Well, let yourself be amazed. Just don’t come crawling to me afterwards begging me to stop humiliating you so thoroughly.”

As Furina silently watched you chop together whatever ingredients she found at home from the dinner table, she couldn’t help but think about how wrong what was supposed to be nothing but another one of your private rehearsals had turned out…

“Bravo! It almost felt like looking into a mirror”, you exclaimed while clapping once Furina had finished reciting your lines perfectly, striking a pose that practically screamed at you to praise her more, a request you were all too willing to indulge her in.

“I’m starting to worry for every actor’s career, considering how you seem to be able to play every role you can get your hands on, Miss Furina”, you continued, only for her face to get happier with each passing word, before eventually raising her hand.

“This should suffice. Do not fret for your career, I’ll make sure to secure you a role alongside me if you ever find your pool of possibilities to suffer from a drought.”

You had a fully prepared response ready, but when you noticed the dark clouds covering the usually colorful sky, you quickly sidelined your current thoughts, choosing to focus on what seemed important.

“It might not be a bad idea to finish for today. It seems like it’s going to rain… and quite a lot at that”, you stated before pointing out of the window, causing Furina’s eyes to wander to where you’d been pointing, only for her to let out a deep groan.

“Rain? Why now? Couldn’t it have rained at night?” She complained to no one in particular, turning around and grabbing her jacket, giving you a small smile as you held the door open once again before speaking up.

“You should head straight home, or else you might not make it before the rain starts.”

“Heh, I’m not made out of sugar. I’ll be fine”, you joked in a confident tone, almost as if challenging the sky to try and wash you away with a flood, ignoring her attempts at playing the voice of reason…

“How’s the rain?”, you asked from the other room, trying your hardest to multitask everything from holding a conversation, walking around the kitchen, peeling some potatoes, cutting a carrot or two and not starting a house fire by accidentally leaving the stove on for a little too long.

“Not great, it seems to have gotten worse”, Furina responded in a meek voice, continuing to stare out of the window, refusing to look in your general direction, too scared of what sort of look she might find on your face.

“Something wrong? You’re unusually quiet”, you asked, only to get a semi-attentive hum as a response.

If only you had agreed to go home on your own instead of accompanying her, maybe then you wouldn’t have to see the inside of her apartment. Sure, she wasn’t as depressed as she was before rekindling her passion for acting, leaving her home far more often and for different reasons than just to buy macaroni, but that still didn’t mean her home looked too much different from back then.

With how little time she spent in it during the day, going to your private rehearsing sessions whenever she found the time… which she admittedly did have a lot of, and how tired she was when returning home, only wishing to grab a bowl of pasta and sauce before falling asleep almost instantly, there wasn’t exactly that much time she had for cleaning. But it was fine, she was eventually going to get around to do it, tomorrow maybe, she was tired already after all. Unfortunately for her however, the rain came before “tomorrow” could finally make its appearance. Now forced with the choice of either letting you see this rather pathetic side of her or forcing you to go home in this horrible storm, Furina couldn’t stomach the thought of shutting her door in front of you, and so… this happened.

“Here, it’s a recipe my father always used to make whenever there wasn’t much around. It requires little ingredients and tastes pretty good for how little time it takes”, you stated before setting down a plate in front of her, meeting her glance upwards with a smile you hoped would cheer her up somehow.

“Now that I think about it, you would have loved that old man. He had a lot of stories to tell, enough for him to write a small book about them. Apparently they found some popularity abroad for a few years, it would surprise you how much it netted him. Enough to take us on a small holiday abroad”, you talked to fill the silence, sitting down on the opposite chair from her, digging into your meal almost instantly.

“Was your father an adventurer?”, Furina eventually asked, catching you by surprise as you struggled to gulp down the last bite as quickly as possible, not wanting to leave her waiting for a response.

“No, a clerk. Quite a boring job, but what his life missed in adventures, his imagination made up for”, you responded before just as quickly continuing, “My mother however was one, quite a passionate one at that. We couldn’t exactly see her too often because of that, but whenever we did, she returned with all kinds of treasures.”

“I’m sorry”, came the words from Furina’s mouth, almost silent enough for you to miss them, confusing you for a split second, but just as you were about to reassure her that it was fine and she had no need to feel bad for asking about your parents, her voice rang through the room once again. “I should have cleaned up, it’s just that I didn’t know you were going to come over today and… things have been a bit difficult.”

Only at that moment did you look around the room, trying to understand what she was talking about, and sure enough, there were quite a few things one could point out as not exactly being tidy, but considering how much worse apartments you had witnessed over the years, it was nothing too bad. No matter how much she talked herself down, Furina still made sure her home had a certain level of tidiness, after all.

“No need to apologize, it’s really not that bad, especially considering you probably weren’t too used to living alone before. If you need help with anything however, just tell me and I’ll lend you a hand. The only thing I’m judging you for are your acting skills after all”, you responded half-jokingly and while it didn’t seem to have too much of an effect at first, you did notice Furina gradually returning to her usual self during the course of your meal.

Eventually however, the storm finally subsided, leaving you free to finally return home. “Thanks a lot for today’s rehearsal and for letting me stay here instead of walking through the rain. Until next time, Furina”, you said your goodbyes only for Furina to quickly step forward and open the door for you, gesturing you to step through the door with a smile once again adorning her lips.

The following weeks brought surprisingly little changes to Furina’s schedule, something that would have usually meant a lot of discontent from her side, considering how she liked to spice things up every now and again, detesting the idea of living through the same cycle day in and day out. And yet, she found herself rather content with it all. And although your private rehearsals still continued outside of your normal one’s, they strayed further and further from their original goal as time went on, both of you starting to simply use it as a convenient excuse to hang out instead of solely using it to rehearse.

And so, after you had managed to rehearse the few remaining lines until you knew them from both heart and memory, the two of you still found yourself with a lot of time left, the sun still far from setting as it illuminated even the least accessible corners of Fontaine. Furina had nearly suggested parting for the day, when you had come up with a different idea, one she found herself easily getting on board with.

“Would you like to go eat somewhere? I feel like I’m starving”, if it hadn’t been for the sound of your stomach rumbling, Furina could have caught herself thinking you were simply too shy to ask her to spend a bit more time together, and while your face was as red as she imagined her own would be when asking you out on a date, it was a safe bet to say you blushing probably had a lot more to do with the previously mentioned reason than with anything romantic.

And here you were now, sitting at a table for two in a cafe she had always wanted to visit but didn’t find the time to, Furina already having placed her order while you still struggled with choosing what you’d like to eat, intensely staring at the menu in your hand while subconsciously making a… rather cute face. It had taken her quite a bit of convincing to make the cafe owner accept money from her, arguing that there was no reason to treat her any differently from the other citizens since she wasn’t their Archon any more, but even then the two of them could only agree on a discount, and yet all the conflicted feelings the undeserved, preferential treatment made her feel, vanished into thin air while she observed you, a small smile making its way onto her face when your eyes widened the moment they skimmed over the parfait section.

“Looks like you made your decision”, she joked as you got startled by the sound of her voice, your face turning red as you avoided eye-contact.

“No, I was just wondering why they were selling parfaits in a cafe like this. I doubt there’s any children visiting this place”, you argued back, only for the blue-haired girl's smile to get ever so slightly bigger.

Oh my, what happened to your usual self? Was all it took for you to get self-conscious to be surrounded by strangers in a public place? If so, she was surprised you could walk onto the stage as easily as you did, never so much as showing the slightest hint of nervousness while acting.

“Excuse me, could I have two parfaits please”, she asked the server passing by, only to receive a nod of acknowledgement before they wrote something down.

“Didn’t you already order something?”, was all you had to ask, the slightest hint of teasing in your voice, only for Furina to give you a small smile in return.

“Just demonstrating how easy it can be to pick something. Did it help?”

When she saw you struggle not to smile at her comment, she couldn’t help but congratulate herself by taking a sip of her drink and before she knew it, you had finally managed to order a drink, only for her second order to arrive merely moments after you had done so. Without saying a word, she slid one of the two desserts over to you before quickly making up an excuse to appease your mind.

“I may have ordered a bit too much for myself, would you mind sharing?”

When you finally finished your act of reluctantly accepting the food and took your first bite, only to throw any semblance of ego out of the window as you practically began melting in front of her the second your spoon made contact with the inside of your mouth. It was then that Furina caught herself shamelessly staring at you, ignoring her own food entirely as her stomach was filled with butterflies at the sight of how happy you were. It was cute, there was no use in calling it anything else anymore, and the thought that you were this happy just because of her filled her with an indescribable feeling. Sure, there had been many times she inspired positive feelings in others, but never before in her entire life was it anyone she considered close, so knowing she could make your days a little brighter with small deeds like these gave her hopes that she wasn’t completely without a purpose in life.

She hadn’t even noticed her mouth slightly opening before your voice had brought her back to reality, instantly causing her to turn away as her face heated up.

“Do I have something on my face?”, you asked, only for Furina to try her best at playing it off, nervously piecing her response together word for word until she had found something workable, something that allowed the day to continue for a little bit longer before you eventually had to part ways.

As time went on, both of you began to care less and less about the big show on your doorstep, you had spent more time than anyone reciting your lines, learning them until you knew them better than their author, studied your choreography until you were certain you would be able to seamlessly perform your roles even in pitch-black darkness and were instead spending most of your time together doing what you wanted, already having practiced everything there was...

Well, there was one more scene left for the two of you to rehearse. One you two had procrastinated on for weeks. Was it because it was the final scene in the play or because the longer Furina got to know you, the more nervous she became whenever it got closer. You had miraculously avoided having to rehearse it with the others around, Furina bluffing her way out of it by telling the director doing so was just a waste of time, since it only required the two of you and you had practiced it often enough in private for there to be any need. The whole discussion was embarrassing, but far less mentally scarring than it would have been if she hadn’t said anything.

That being said, today was the last chance to rehearse it, and while neither of you had any problems with anything up until now, you could see her grow more and more tense with every word you spoke.

“I have many regrets in my life, whether one of my many mistakes and shortcomings, or moments in which I stood and watched while I should have acted. I chose to follow you, even though it meant I’d see many of those I treasured the most leave without saying their goodbyes. I fought with you at least as often as I fought by your side, often facing death head on, and still I wear more scars on my heart than on my body”, you spoke with an aura of certainty, one that forced people to listen whether they wanted to or not, your voice was strict as if lecturing someone yet still carried a hint of gratitude, one getting more noticeable once your face softened, “And yet, if I were given the chance to go back in time and change things, I wouldn’t. Because no matter how much misery this path I took led me to, it also allowed me to stay by your side, something I wouldn’t trade for anything this world has to offer.”

“Why?”, Furina asked in a tone that was as soft as it was confused, only for you to smile in response, one, while amused in nature, still shined as radiantly as a stagelight.

“Because I love you.”

Furina was a masterful actress, being able to come up with suitable responses on the go and, with the exception of a few cases, never breaking character. And yet, even though she knew fully well what the script intended for you to do, when you started to slowly lean in, she just couldn’t do it, shutting her eyes in embarrassment as her face turned red enough to match a tomato.

“I-I’m sorry, I can’t!”, she practically screamed in your face, only to immediately apologize, feeling herself shrinking as she wished for nothing more than to sink through the floor. And yet, her wish wasn’t granted, and instead she found herself still standing in front of you the next time she opened her eyes, just in a far more pathetic manner than previously.

When Furina looked up at your face however, the shocked look on your face spoke more than a million words, your questions being so clearly on display that they might as well just be written all over your forehead.

“No problem, I’m sure it must be awkward to do this with a friend, even if it’s just for show… Ah, just imagine someone else, like a-... celebrity you had a crush on… or a cardboard cut-out of yourself”, you tried to lift the mood with a small joke, barely managing to raise the corners of your lips yourself when you saw her still worried face.

“I-... never did this before”, Furina murmured out, barely loud enough for it to be intelligible, and yet, you picked up on it, immediately raising your eyebrows.

“Kiss someone for a play?”, you asked, only for the former Archon to shake her head, her face turning a deep red as you saw her struggle to speak.

“Kiss… someone.” It shouldn’t be such a big deal, she spent the last 500 years playing the role of the Archon of Fontaine, never as much as making a single meaningful human connection, so her not having a slither of romantic experience was nothing surprising. Kissing anyone else for a play also wouldn’t have been that difficult, since Furina was sure she’d be able to enter her professional mode and just see it as a normal part of her career, and yet, with you, she found the task almost insurmountable, her heart beating with such ferocity and pace that it was a wonder you couldn’t hear it while she grew so nervous that it became difficult to breathe whenever you said or did anything romantic… even if it was clearly just part of the script.

“Oh”, was all you managed to say, a downcast expression setting on your face for a split second before it quickly vanished, replaced with an apologetic smile. “I’m very sorry I have to be your first, I’m sure you’d want to save it for someone special, but considering we don’t have any rehearsals until the show anymore we have to practice the scene today”, you stated only for worry to once again fill your mind when Furina didn’t seem to react at all, simply having shut her eyes while taking deep breaths, only to suddenly spring in action the moment you opened your mouth to say something once again, pressing her lips against yours with such determination that it took you completely off-guard, before eventually pulling away.

“There’s no one else I’d want to give my first kiss to more than you”, Furina spoke, having summoned enough courage to finally speak again, although her voice was still somewhat shaky. It took you a few moments to finally comprehend what was happening, although by the time you did, she had already started her next sentence.

“I love you. I don’t know for how long, but I know why. I love to make you smile, I love to hear your laugh. I love that you didn’t judge me no matter how arrogant and overly brazen I can be from time to time or no matter what a mess I am outside of acting. Without you my only interactions would either be for work or with the shop owner. I’ve learned and experienced so much these past few months, and I know it wouldn’t have been possible on my own. You confide in me so much, and I wish for nothing more than to finally start doing the same, but I still can’t bring myself to do it when there’s just the smallest possibility of us not seeing each other again once this play is done. So will you please tell me how you feel so I can put either my wishes or fears to rest?”

Now that Furina voiced her feelings, she felt herself deflate like a balloon, all of her summoned courage leaving her body as she started to squirm at how cheesy she sounded, but before she could fall into old habits and start looking for an escape, she was brought back to reality by the feeling of her hands being taken into yours, causing her to look up for a split-second, one long enough for you to give her your answer by placing your lips on her’s.

“Was that enough to get my feelings across, Furina?” The moment the words left your mouth, Furina embraced you in a hug, holding onto you as if her life depended on it before you quickly put your arms around her as well, only for the sound of her sobbing to cause a mixture of worry and confusion to flare up inside of you. Just as you were about to comfort her however, you were interrupted by a giggle, faint at first but growing louder until Furina was laughing to herself in between her tears, her lips curled into a genuine smile as she pulled back and looked you in the eyes, her own slightly puffy.

“We can celebrate later, we still have a scene to practice.”

#genshin x reader #genshin impact #furina x you #furina #furina x y/n #furina x reader

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robinasnyder · 5 months ago

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I am one of those people who will pay to read Wayne Family Adventures ahead. So like, spoilers through episode 6, but I need to have feelings.

First off, holy shit, wfa coming in hot and not slowing down!

Second of all, continuing Duke and Jason's story lines from previous seasons, plus continuing similar themes and characterizations from Red Hood ant the Outlaws.

Third, so, I like that while they haven't been able to talk Bruce down from his loner nonsense, that he and Dick are able to come to some agreement that he needs to walk it back some, that he needs to contact his kids and actually try to fix things even if he's not ready to take the ban off yet.

Fourth, I love Jason’s ptsd episode, the way Dick went after him immediately (while waving everyone else off to not make Jason feel cornered), the way Dick's able to talk Jason down. I love the contrasting of what Jason's saying vs what he's meaning. I love that Jason chose to leave, recognizing that he'd make things harder on himself and everyone else and that he needed to remove himself from the situation. But also that Dick called Artemis and Biz. And I love that when A and B can't talk him around, they call in the big guns (Roy).

I love how we see Bruce and his kids all having similar actions, like both Bruce and Duke reminding themselves that panic will keep them from being able to act. I loved how Bruce is scared when he realizes Jason disappeared, but takes Dick's phone call and listens to Dick about needing to let him go. And Dick's reassurance that he sent help.

I love Bruce being worried and upset because Damian left the manor and he wants him to come back, that he recognizes that he did hurt Damian (and all of his kids).

I love how, while Jason is the one getting the longer arc so far, the story treats Jason, Duke and Barbara's trauma from the Joker as carrying equal weight and importance to them individually. I love how everyone recognizes why Bruce is acting the way he is, and also calls him out on it, because his fear and trauma is making him lash out and they all know it and it's not okay. Also, Jom Gordon's trauma with the Joker is noted as well, in the grim way he tells Batman he hopes Batman can catch him quickly.

And, on a happier (ish) note, I love that Duke thinks of Bruce when he thinks of home.

I do want them to go back to silly stuff, but I am enjoying this because it feels like an extension of the serious episodes they've done, while also giving a chance for the characters to attempt to handle a bad situation in the healthies way possible.

Aaaand I'm totally ready to have my heart broken (in the good way and in the bad way), but I'm going to go in optimistic.

#batman #batman wayne family adventures #wayne family adventures #wfa #dc comics #dc #spoilers

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luciaintheskyainthi · 3 months ago

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I'm not so bold as to ask for spoilers but,,, would you be willing to share ideas that didn't make the cut or like almost fic ideas?? I hunger for more

Hahaha I like to stay veeery hush hush about spoilers, but here are a couple of things that didn't make the cut in Existential Crisis Mode:

In my original drafting notes, I put Jason as the one to suggest he and Peter suggest to fake date after Dick misinterprets Peter's presence. I changed it 'cause I didn't think that made much sense for Jason's character (to push onto Peter)

This fic was in its infancy while I was still reading Red Hood: Outlaw and didn't know they'd broken up, so I had been tossing up the idea of Peter joining the Outlaws (I really love Biz and Artemis!!). I was floating around some alternate names for him as a consequence, like Nonesuch, Nomad (screw originality), Spectre or something equally angsty to highlight Peter's feeling of displacement. I actually still love that idea (of Peter with the Outlaws. I reckon him and Artemis would be the best of pals at annoying Jason, and it would be ADORABLE seeing him and Bizzaro together), so if someone could do that for me, it'd be much appreciated TYVM 😹🤭 (Or who knows, maybe sometime far in the future I'll do it anyway....)

Dog was a last minute addition in the writing of chapter 2 and I've never looked back.

Jason was going to drag Cass around to his place (pre family gathering) to get a read on Peter... but Pete managed to show to Jason (through Dog) the kind of person he is, so that never came to fruition.

The origins, organisation and motivations of the cult to come have changed quite substantially (and that's all I'm saying on the matter) 😘

#fanfic #existential crisis mode #peter parker #jason todd #peter parker x jason todd #crossover #marvel x dc

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rtfics · 2 months ago

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Seeing BJ2 the 3rd time.

LONG & FILLED WITH SPOILERS

SO much to think about, and my memory is shit.

I rapidly scribbled notes during the film. But when I got home and tried to read them:

So here's an overview. I'll post other details if I ever translate my notes.

First, the casting was perfection. I'd never seen Jenny Ortega, Justin Theroux, and Monica Bellucci before, so for me they were the characters.

It was interesting that the film opens with the Warner Brothers Studio lot in black & white. Why B&W? It sort of sets the tone.

Donna Summer singing lines from "MacArthur's Park" was a foreshadowing. This film was made by a guy who was a teen in the 70s, and it's for others his age (he's only 2 years older than me). BJ2 is packed with 70s nostalgia that only those who were alive then would get.

This sequel was also made for die-hard fans of the original Beetlejuice. Burton took special care to give us the Winter River we love, but updated it to show the story and its characters aren't stuck in the past. The covered bridge is there, the church, cemetery, Miss Shannon's, and fire station are there, and so is the Maitland's building, but it's a coffee shop now.

Seeing Lydia as shell-shocked and pill-popping threw me, but the plot gave it sense (I'll go into detail in a separate post).

Rory, OMFG, I've known Rory. Anyone who's had anything to do with the entertainment/media biz, even peripherally, knows Rory. His "enabler" bullshit was so spot-on; faking that he's going to get Lydia off her dependency on drugs while keeping her hooked by making it seem that he's doing it because she's begging him. Classic user methodology. You just know he's the one who got her on "coping" pills in the first place; all the better to manipulate her. I loathed him immediately.

I adore what they did with Delia. It completely fucking made sense, and followed what's happened in the modern NYC Arts scene. I love how she and Lydia now get along, I mean, shit, Lydia's in her 50s and Delia's in her 70s, they're both middle-aged women, and, bless their hearts, the screenwriters and Burton made them act like grown women.

Astrid seemed older than 16 to me, but hey, I'm not around teenagers these days. I appreciated that she wasn't a brat. Her resentment and having her back up were appropriate for her family situation; a beloved father whose body was never found (I think); a mom always working or promoting because of Rory, doped on pills and famous for being a ghost-seeing nutjob, who can't see Astrid's father. That's a lot to deal with.

The way they handled Charles was perfect, especially his claymation demise. His afterlife body was comically gross, and an ingenious way of including Charles in the film without having to recast another actor, except for his voice. Charles being in the Netherworld provides a great thread to Delia's later death. His headstone being the shape of a shark's fin was a humorously grim touch.

The Sylvia Young Theatre School Choir sang at Charles' funeral, and their voices were beautiful.

Arthur Conti was fantastic as Jeremy (70s teens remember his grandfather, Scottish actor Tom Conti). His American accent was flawless. He was the perfect balance of cute and mature, and his niceness made his being evil all the worse; while Astrid says the incantation you can see him slightly out of focus behind her, smiling in a chilling way. I love that there isn't the slightest hint that he's a multiple murderer, and of his own parents! When he's about to get his passport stamped he shows absolutely no remorse toward Astrid, which makes his damnation all the sweeter.

Beetlejuice . . . . What can I say? Michael Keaton created Beetlejuice as we know him, and he fit right back in character as easily as drawing breath. His body language, his weird way of walking, his expressions, everything is just as you'd expect Beej to be. But then we get to see more! I can't express how happy I was to see Beej's origin story, which turned the throw-away line about having a pretty good time during the Black Death into something more substantial. Seeing Keaton as human Beej was a delight.

An important detail was that, even though Beej says his heart had long since withered, he fell for Delores. He says he was "bewitched." Perhaps not love, but lust certainly. It's quite clear that Delores was much higher in social station than Beetlejuice, so he must have thought he'd won the lottery with her choosing him. My god, his ego had no problem with his drunken ass being hauled to bed by his new wife, and his enthusiasm was huge. I love that they gave him the gut in his human form (Keaton doesn't have one).

Richard was the nice guy I hoped he would be. But it was telling that, when he says goodbye to Lydia at the ladder in the mausoleum, they don't hug. They don't even shake hands. It shows the truth of Lydia's previous statement to Astrid that she and Richard's relationship had ended long before his death.

Wolf is every 70s crime drama/movie distilled. Hammy, over the top, constantly spouting his Catch Phrase.

Why are there so many shrunken head guys? And why did Beej hire people who can't talk to answer his phones? It's loony and fits the Netherworld random logic. They're Beej's Minions.

I've seen a lot of people on tumblr, as well as professional movie critics, say there were "too many villains" and that the plot was "too hard to follow."

For those who agree with this, I recommend you never attempt to read anything by Charles Dickens, Alexandre Dumas, Victor Hugo, Edgar Allan Poe's detective stories, or Agatha Christie. Because your brains would fry.

Look, there are two villains. Just two.

Delores poisoned Beetlejuice, he killed her with an axe in revenge, in the Afterlife she reassembles and hunts him down, killing others in her wake, which sets Wolf Jackson and the Ghoul Squad after her, until she's defeated with a sandworm.

Rory has been manipulating Lydia, keeping her doped, gas-lighting her, until under the Truth Serum injected by Beej he spills the beans and Lydia rejects him, until he's eaten at the same time as Delores by the sandworm.

As for "Delores and Rory weren't given enough story," what more do you want? How Delores joined a soul-sucking cult? How Rory became a user, seeking out vulnerable, grieving women to exploit? We learn as much as we need to. Anything more would have stuffed the film with unnecessary crap.

The only shit I didn't care for was the baby.

The whole Counseling scene was a big gross-out, and I'm sure Tim Burton intended it that way. The original couldn't have been more gross than it was or it would have earned an R Rating, keeping out everyone under the age of 18 (21 in some states; this was the 80s). But now, Burton could be a lot more graphic. I was stunned that he had Lydia go through the "pregnancy," but it obviously didn't hurt her. For me Babyjuice has no point. It doesn't advance the plot, and its reappearance only drives home the weirdness of the ending.

What the ever fuck was the ending??

Especially Astrid giving birth to the Beetlebaby. It would suggest Beetlejuice is its father, which means he and Astrid had sex. Which we can be pretty sure they didn't . . ? In the counseling scene Beej refers to the baby as his "inner child." So its not his literal child? Even so, why would Astrid give birth to it the same way her mother did?

I've read all the theories about the ending, and at this point one's as good as the other. Perhaps that's the point: To keep us all guessing. Because I'm sure, all along, there's been a plan for Beetlejuice 3, IF this movie was a hit. If it wasn't, if it bombed (since 2010 all of Burton's films have bombed), the ending would lead to speculation forever, to people writing fucking dissertations about its symbology and metaphors, etc.

But if it was a hit, which it is, the seeds are there for a third and final film. But so fucking murky no one can guess what it'll be like.

The only part of the ending I liked was Beej shaking awake and saying, as he glances at Lydia, "I just had the weirdest dream." And Lydia looking over. Not terrified. Not screaming or leaping out of bed. Not seeing the indentation in the pillow and yelling in protest. Just staring.

Do I want a third film?

I love Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. I love it more every time I watch it. I accept everything in it as canon, even the baby, resentfully.

But Burton might fuck up the last one. He might do things I never wanted to be canon. When a sequel is made of a hit film, the creators sometimes become self-conscious. BJ2 wasn't, because it'd been 36 years since the original. They had no idea whether this version would fly. Since it has, massively, I'm afraid the screenwriters and Burton may become too aware of the audience and try to cater to it. OR they'll go the opposite direction and try to come up with a plot they think fans would never imagine.

So I'm pretty much stuck in the same place I was before I saw Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. Wary, skeptical, and cynical.

#Beetlejuice Beetlejuice #beetlejuice #Beetlejuice 2 #Beetlejuice sequel #Beetlejuice 2 review sort of #Michael Keaton #winona ryder #jenny ortega #catherine o'hara #justin theroux #monica bellucci #willem dafoe

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the-knight-of-destiny · 7 months ago

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On Fantasy High, Redemption, and Agency (General Spoilers for Junior Year, sort of?) Also this post about FHJY is long as fuck, as all of mine are getting. In short it's my understanding of how Brennan Lee Mulligan sets up the teenage villains of Fantasy High.

Fair warning, this is LOOOONG below the cut.

Y'know when I said I wasn't going to talk about Ratgrinder discourse? I lied.

So Brennan as a DM has a very specific narrative language for how a villain is 'redeemable' and it primarily has to do with the level of agency a villain has in their actions. This isn't particularly hard to notice when you look at our very own (and fan favorite) reformed villain squad.

Starting with Ragh, while he was in his right mind for most of his villainy in Freshman Year, he really didn't do too much other than beat people up and be a bully? While he worked with Daybreak on some level, he wasn't anything more than muscle and not very in on most of the plans. There was also some implication of grooming and manipulation from Daybreak to Ragh.

Zayn as an example also helps build this thesis, while he also hasn't done a TON evil he's generally a bit more discerning than Ragh. However he builds the understanding of how Fantasy High looks at it's redeemed teenage villains, when Zayn is found as a ghost he explicitly calls out Daybreak as being the only reason he's still housed, were he not to go along with the Freshman Year scheme he'd have been sent back to his abusive parents, the foster system, or homeless as like, a fifteen year old boy.

But the actual silver bullet to understanding this is Aelwyn, to preface. Aelwyn fucking sucks in freshman year, way worse than Ragh or Zayn. She's also responsible for way worse than any other teenage villain in the series. She's arguably committed worse than Dayne Blayde or Penelope Everpetal, but there's an important component to her redemption in Sophmore Year, something Brennan has her stay conscious despite making death saves to explain.

In tears Aelwyn notes that Kalina was actively threatening to kill her had she not complied with the Kalvaxus plan.

So there's a running theme here, Ragh didn't seem to have much of an idea of what the wider plan even was and was just muscle, Zayn was under significant threat to his personal safety (and unbeknownst to him, also under threat of death, a threat that actually gets carried out), and Aelwyn was literally convinced she'd be murdered for not complying.

This tracks with the teen villains who DON'T get redeemed by the way, Dayne had no qualms about casually murdering his classmates with a great sword, Penelope didn't seem to mind the idea of throwing her best friend Kalvaxus for a power play. They both get killed because they don't seem to really care what happened, were fully complicit, and had no form of remorse at all.

This leaves us with our code to cracking if Brennan sees the Ratgrinders as possibly worthy of redemption (IMO, signs point to yes, but it's complicated.) We know the Ratgrinders are being manipulated heavily by Porter (I have so many more thoughts about Jace's place in this but that's for a whole other post,) however they don't have Ragh's excuse of being mostly in the dark.

Kipperlilly and Oisin for sure know exactly what's going on, and the rest (sans Buddy) probably do too. The actual question is how much does Ankarna rage affect one's reasoning, and the thing that's interesting about how the Ratgrinders have been set up is that question is sincerely ambiguous.

Signs point to the corruption needing some sort of genuine anger or frustration to latch onto, but this is my first hot take here. This isn't really that damning? Pre-Rage Kipperlilly said some concerning things, in private confidential counseling. She (at the time) understood her fixation on Riz was a problem and perhaps not fair. Oisin probably was mildly frustrated or saddened a girl he had a crush on didn't notice him, but to cast Pre-Rage Oisin as a full on Biz Glitterdew incel is, in my opinion, unlikely. Ruben was already seeking attention but wasn't anything worse than a mildly annoying teenage boy, etc.

These aren't exactly 'good' feelings but they are pretty normal for 14-15 year olds. Pre-Rage Ratgrinders really aren't that much worse than Pre-Character Development Bad Kids, let's not forget that they too definitely act out in really mean, unfair ways at around the same time as Pre-Rage Ratgrinders (Fig and Fabian, most notably.)

As for agency though, they clearly have a bit more of it than previous teenage villains, and are a bit more aware of their actions. They're not under direct threat of violence like Aelwyn or Zayn (though the way Porter and Jace act around them may make that threat implicit.) and they don't have Ragh's excuse of being seemingly largely in the dark.

The Ratgrinders I feel are an intentional test for the Bad Kids (and the Intrepid Heroes as players) because they're significantly more antagonistic than previous teenage villains. Heck, even ones that turned out totally evil. Dayne's kinda chill to the Bad Kids initially, Penelope is a bit backhanded but she isn't outright mean. If you count him, even Johnny Spells humors Riz and is relatively lax to him. Ragh's honestly way more harsh for most of the first half of Freshman Year, Zayn's initially more rude and confrontational to them too.

That said they're both being influenced by a much worse adult (Like everyone in the Reformed Villain Squad) and have a rage god clouding their judgement to an unknown degree. If we follow previously established patterns, they're salvageable by the story's own logic.

The test is for the party, it's easy to forgive Zayn when he openly cries and apologizes immediately when finally confronted about his place in the villain plot, it's easier to forgive Aelwyn when she openly puts herself in harm's way and almost dies to save Adaine.

It's going to be harder, emotionally, for both the player characters and the players themselves to forgive the Ratgrinders and recognize they're also victims in some sense when the Ratgrinders have been actively fucking with the Bad Kids for the whole season, and taking an obvious amount of satisfaction in it.

The challenge Brennan has set up for the party, I feel, is a test of their character. Fighting a possibly ascended god Porter is gonna be a lot easier without a whole other party of enemies in the fight (and even much easier if you can convince some to fight alongside you as a part of heroes.)

#fhjy #fhjy spoilers #fhjy meta #dimension 20 #rat grinders #brennan lee mulligan #i just think there is a good discussion about the line between us as viewers and the players at the table to be had #like we haven't been immersing ourselves AS characters getting toyed with by the ratgrinders for over 20 hours of playtime #the reason they seemed to want to recruit mary ann was because shes funny and hasnt actively antagonized anyone #there's something to be said about how PC morality towards NPCs often stems from how fun the NPC is for the player to interact with #like the bad kids hated kipperlilly and treated her terribly way before she did anything mean or evil to them #mostly just because they thought she was annoying this is how npc treatment goes in most dnd campaigns d20 or not

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lowkeyed1 · 1 year ago

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Willow Month 2023: Day 3 - Favorite Episode This is a tough call for me, because it's very close. I love Episode 7: Across the Shattered Sea because it has so much gorgeous character development for everyone and so much beautiful scenery, but Episode 4: Whispers of Nockmaar just barely shades it. I think it's the whump. This ep is basically 45 minutes of whumping on poor Graydon and.... he suffers beautifully.

This poor kid starts off the ep infected with dark magic. He and the group both know it will eventually corrupt his entire system, cause him to become possessed and try to kill everyone, and they will have to kill him. And they spend the first part of the episode chaining him up and not doing anything about it, except Elora comforting him.

They finally decide to do something and this leads to him restrained even more, splayed out on some kind of bench. He spends a lot of time writhing and moaning in pain. They tear his shirt open while he gasps, exposing horrific scarring he feels deeply ashamed of and doesn't want to talk about, while he sweats and groans even more.

Then they throw a bucket of liquid on him while he writhes around some more and it's obviously painful and I should probably just acknowledge it's not just the whump I love in this episode? They did NOT have to make this whole thing so BDSM but they really did, god bless them. Plus lovely grace notes in the script referring to him being ravaged and also reamed -_-

ANYWAY we go on from here to his having hallucinations about his painful past, then the possession really starts to set in and he gets aggressive, then starts talking in the voices of loved ones to scare and distract people. Then we have a break in the action and when we get back to Graydon...

well. all right then. Spoiler, he's fully possessed here but acting like he's not. You can tell because they flat-ironed his hair! Lol, but also he's uncharacteristically comfortable with his exposed flesh and touching other people which seems like a nice, subtle hint.

Trust me, Graydon in his right mind is never leaving that many buttons unbuttoned. He leads Elora up to the tower so he can complete the banishment ritual Bavmorda was trying to do to baby Elora at the end of the movie, but then everyone else shows up and he gets whumped on some more...

Literally I would die, as an actor, if I had Erin and Ruby holding me down and Amar crawling on top of me and pretending to pummel me but like. That's the biz, I guess?

At any rate, Kit convinces Elora that she is magic enough to fix this, so she goes and almost-but-not-quite kisses him (she does call it a kiss later) and sucks the evil out of him. He tells her he never doubted her, and the boy is clearly smitten after that

Unfortunately, Elora had a vision of him shoving his brother out of a tree when he was possessed as a child and feels like he might be sketchy. So he's giving her a big smitten smile when they leave....

(credit to willowgifsdaily for this gif)

...but that smile starts to falter bc she's giving him this look in return, yikes

Anyway, that was good wholesome fun for the whole family and kudos to Disney+ for realizing they needed to put in a bondage-themed whumpfest to really sell me on the show! And kudos once again to my boy Tony Revolori, who sells every inch of this episode just amazingly. The emotional range is all over the place and there's no part where he falters in just performing the absolute shit out of this one. This episode changed my brain chemistry forever, I think. And that is why Whispers of Nockmaar is my favorite episode of WIllow! Send help!

#willowmonth2023 #willow series #willow 2022 #graydon hastur #whispers of nockmaar #save willow #posts where i make my kinks obvious #but tbh i feel like probably it was already obvious XD #whump

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remidyal · 8 months ago

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Bad Ideas of the Day Part 8 - The Ocho

Part 8 of the series of my occasional roundup of my bad ideas of the day from the D20 Fanfic Discord, as always the link back to the prior one is available here and as always anyone who wants to do something with these ideas is moreeeee than welcome to do so, though I'd love to hear about it!

This list contains spoilers for FHJY through current as of writing (episode 10) as many of the ideas on this edition involve events from this season; I've put it below the read more for that reason. Some of the ideas mark where spoilers are contained up through.

Bad Idea of the Day, Trust Issues Edition, FHJY spoilers through episode four: Fabian, wanting to cash out but not wanting to give Chungledown Bim 18 million gold pieces, tries to find a convincing nemesis who the bank will believe and who will use the money they get in a way that won't bother him, such as to further shitting in his mouth. He finds someone who both has a history that often leads to nemesis-dom and is willing to commit major financial crimes for money: His ex-girlfriend, Aelwyn Abernant. Now, they just need to stage a public enough fight to get her on the list before he cashes out…

Bad idea of the day, Total Party Kill edition: The bad kids and Aelwyn cut a little TOO loose during the fight at Ostentatia's, and instead of nobody getting THAT hurt during the timestop they actually collapse the house on top of all the hudol kids inside, landing all of them in a world of trouble BEFORE they can meet up with Biz…

Bad idea of the day, 'fake' dating edition: Kristen decides that she can maybe make her parents okay with her being a lesbian if she starts off with the worst possible partner for her parents and then backs down to just a normal girl like Tracker. So she asks her friendly local tiefling to come with her to a family dinner as her girlfriend…

Bad idea of the day, the beauty of nature edition: On a trip to the far haven woods to spy on the ratgrinders, Adaine is alarmed to discover that as she grows up the Oracle becomes imbibed with full disney princess powers, and it is very difficult to go about one's business sneakily when all the trees and wildlife are constantly singing to her as she goes

Bad Idea of the Day, spoilers through JY episode 5 edition: In the middle of a fight of gods at the mall, one man whose soul truly represents the very worst the mall has to offer appears, immune to the rage from the stars, wielding a comically large sword and looking like a reject from the Armour Zombie and Lich catalogue: One Cody Walsh.

Bad idea of the day part two, I can't believe I forgot about this detail from the Seven edition: The Ministry of Adventure, in a timeline where their shit isn't pushed in by the Seven, send one of their honeytrap agents to try to ensnare one of the brightest up and coming adventurers in all of Solace. Then, when that one fails, they send another, and another. How is eligible bachelor detective Riz Gukgak seeing through all of their schemes, they wonder?

Bad idea of the day, reclassification edition, JY spoilers through six: In a determination to make certain Kristen can stay in school even without a god, the Bad Kids look for another class to fit Kristen into. Can she try out for Rogue or Fighter or anything else without stabbing herself with her -3 dex?

Bad idea of the day, backup escape routes edition, spoilers through episode 5 of Junior Year: Instead of being bailed out by Connor Counterspell, the Bad Kids are forced to take a different exit from the Mall of the Synod of Spyre through the only obvious portal: The one into the strudel dimension in Oodles of Strudels. There, they find themselves in not just a strudel dimension, but in fact an entire plane of pastry, including a giant octopus-esque monster who is very angry with Adaine in particular as the strudel she has been chopping has been one of its tendrils. Can they survive long enough for Adaine to hit level 13 and get Plane Shift, or will they fall to the forces of the Pop-Tart King?

Bad idea of the day, impractical bard forms edition: Encouraged towards something that is 'respectable' and in which her 'lack of wizardly talent' won't be as much of an impediment, Adaine ends up a bard of visual arts. Specifically, oil paintings. Can she be a useful party member with a form of bardic work in which even a simple spell takes an hour, just because it's the sort of thing that's okay in Fallinel's high society?

Bad idea of the day, soulmates edition: Every pirate gets a birthmark that appears within the first few years of their life indicating the highest rank they'll ever hold on a crew. Bill Seacaster's heart is crushed when his darling boy Fabian's birthmark appears and indicates that he'll never be higher than a First Mate.

Bad idea of the day, courtesy of tumblr edition: Adaine, party wizard, has a sister with crazy drug dealing stories and a dad with crazy drug dealing stories and a need for cash. Who could have seen, when she started drug dealing at parties, that it would end in crazy stories and pain?

Bad idea of the day, Fantasy High edition, spoilers through episode 7 JY: The bad kids do, in fact, do drugs at the party, and there's a fight to the death with Grix during the assembly instead of happening later. Can they rally the other students to not be cowards for once?

Bad idea of the day, stop spreading the news edition: Pete and Maddy lead a strike force against the evil wizard who is running the New York Times and using it to spread all sorts of hate and propaganda, especially on a personal level to them the transphobia.

Bad idea of the day, Aguefort didn't know what he was doing REALLY edition: After the murder-suicide in the cafeteria, left with nobody but the corpses of three staff members and some other confused freshmen, Gorgug Thistlespring and Kristen Applebees are brought back from the dead… Shame their souls went into the wrong bodies, isn't it?

Bad idea of the day, wizard tomes editions: Less a plot idea and more just a general notion, we need more cursed items, and in particular here I'm thinking cursed spellbooks. Give Adaine a book that seers knowledge out of her brain, or reverses portent rolls to be the opposite of what she thinks she's doing, maybe (Though actually on that latter note - it would be EXTREMELY on the nose, should Adaine ever become a follower of Cassandra, if her portents stopped working as she became only able to see the worst that was to come but not prevent it.)

Bad idea of the day, keep your friends close and your frenemies closer edition: In the time in between The Unsleeping City 1 and 2, an insurance investigator comes knocking about a very suspicious house fire. Sofia thinks she'll be fine… until she realizes that the investigator is also going to ask Ricky, as the heroic firefighter who first responded to the scene. Can she train Ricky into convincingly lying, or will she be visiting that famous New York prison of Riker's Island?

Bad idea of the day, class swap secret santa edition: Following a decree from Arthur Aguefort that students are too reluctant to try new things and they should dabble more, every student at the Adventuring Academy is required to try out a class they have not previously attended for two weeks that the rest of their party secretly votes on without consulting each other. What will each Bad Kid be stuck doing, and can everyone else figure out a class they're certain Fig has never snuck into?

Bad idea of the day, stunning strike edition: Realizing that they're being exploited by a system that risks their lives and pays them only with grades, not money, for saving the world, the students of Aguefort go on strike. Can they remain united in the face of the Ministry of Adventure and their union-busting assassination squads?

Bad idea of the day, dirty laundry edition, spoilers through jy 10: Taking Adaine's offer to come over and do her laundry while under the invisibility spell so she can avoid people other than Adaine caring for her, Aelwyn unfortunately triggers an investigation from Fig, Kristen, and Sandra Lynn into why their washing machine is suddenly haunted and running on its own. Can she remain unnoticed without causing a problem, or will Kristen banishing her clothing to the Elemental Plane of Detergent?

Bad idea of the day, with grating power comes grating responsibility edition: Adaine never manages to become much of a wizard, but instead manages to tap into something even more core to her personality than the anxiety: Being a petty insulting brat, and finding herself a Lore Bard on the strength of study + cutting words combined. How does her family handle it when the bickering at the table becomes much more deadly?

#fhjy #fhjy spoilers #dimension 20 #fanfic #fantasy high #bad ideas #riz gukgak #adaine abernant #kristen applebees #fabian seacaster #figueroth faeth

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hozaloza · 8 months ago

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When a crackship turned normal ship is becoming your comfort ship and it swims in your head 24/7

anyways

I'm really considering gonna rewrite some of the infection AU just to include this dumb ship ☠️

LISTEN IT'S MY AU, I DO WHAT I WANT--

Okay fr, it's not a big difference, so it's not like I had a drastic change

Anyways I'm pretty sure I've never shared this artwork for it here,,, here it is! Alex Laurier, caretaker of the kids, but mainly Ashlyn.

No matter what he is doing, if Ashlyn needs him or if he is tasked to do an assignment with Ashlyn, he must go, no ifs or buts.

We do not speak of his arm. No one speaks of the incident.

Infection Au lore drop here. No spoilers for the deep lore, just putting it behind a read more bc I can

In the facility, he was given access to an area where he does physical assignments with Ashlyn Banner. These are randomly assigned by the man who runs the research.

This all started when they took a field trip to Savannah, GA. The group was looking around, having fun, and overall having a great time. At some point, they remembered they had signed up for a tour in the area a week before the trip, and they decided to check if they even still had it opened. Luckily, they did, so the group walked to where the Sorrel-Weed house was and were met by a woman with piercings. She welcomed them in, checking that they were the group she was touring before beginning the tour. It was the usual biz; she gave facts, showed them rooms, and would discuss the paranormal activity of the house. While the tour guide was showing them the Francis Sorrel Library, her phone suddenly went off.

"Ah...I'm so sorry, this is my emergency phone. I have to get it." She picked up while walking out of the room. "Please stay here while I get this. Don't touch any of the items while I'm gone, I'll be right back!"

With that, the tour lady leaves.

She leaves the room to actually discuss an actual emergency (something was going on at the facility she worked at).

And while she was gone, Aiden decided to peak out the door to see where she went off to.

"Um, Aiden? What are you doing?" Logan asked. "Checking to make sure the coast is clear, duh" Aiden replied, walking out the door.

So, he forces the group to follow him so they could explore. Tay was all over for this idea, just wanting to look around.

While they looked around, Ashlyn got a strange feeling in her stomach. She felt as though they should head back to the room before the tour guide came back. But she didn't speak up. Eventually they make it to the basement (I'm assuming, idk I've never been to the Sorrel-Weed house), and Ashlyn senses a strange presence in the room. She looks over to where the phantom was in the canon, but nothing is there. "Whatcha looking at?" Aiden asked, scaring Ashlyn. "Ah! Stop sneaking up on me like that!" She yelled. Aiden turned to where she was looking at and started walking towards the room. "What are--" "Oooh, what's this?" Aiden interrupted. The others followed behind, and Ashlyn had no choice but to follow.

They saw a small plant like material in the corner, it's pattern sort of resembling a smile if you really squinted your eyes.

"Say, didn't Logan tell us his grandparents run a plant shop?" Aiden asked, "Um…it's flowers actu--" "Same thing! So, what kind of plant is it?" Aiden asked curiously. Logan took a closer look, but he scrunched his brows, stepping back. "I'm… I'm not sure. Looks nothing like what I've studied." "Maybe we can ask the tour guide when she finds us? She's bound to know--" Before Taylor finished her sentence, Aiden threw a book at the plant, which caused it to release a cloud of smoke. COUGH COUGH "AIDEN!! What the hell was that for?!" Tyler yelled out, gagging as he was unfortunately close to it. Aiden coughed harder than him, having been the one who got the most in his lungs. "I'm sorry! I got curious if it would do something when I threw a book at it!" "What did you think the plant was going to do?? Read us a bedtime story?" Ashlyn wheezed as she wiped the dust off her face. She observed it closely, wondering what the particles even were. 'This…. this doesn't look normal…' Ashlyn thought. "Excuse me?? What are you kids doing down here?? I told y'all to stay in the room!" The tour guide stated. The kids turned around, Whoops, they've been caught. Sigh "Never mind, y'all are young, I can't blame anybody. Let's head back to continue the tour…" She stated, rubbing her eyes.

Ashlyn felt wary of the plant, but it didn't really matter to her. 'It's not our problem anymore.' she thought.

...

The dust never left.

(woah Hoza actually wrote the beginning??) Anyways, that's all I'm sharing, ty for reading my Infection AU snip-shots.

#school bus graveyard #webtoon #ashlyn banner #logan fields #alex laurier #aiden clark #ben clark #taylor hernandez #tyler hernandez #sbg infection au #infection au #snip shot #one shot

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jakesbrain · 2 months ago

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My opinions on The Substance

This is going to be a review, more or less, so I've done my best to avoid giving away the entire movie for those who have yet to see it. I am writing around spoilers and discussing the film in vague and general terms without telling too much of what's actually in it. If you're interested, read on.

TWs: Medical stuff, gore, body horror, mental health, unhealthy standards

I'll get right to the point. This film is brutal, as much of a pitch-black comedy as Dr. Strangelove and simultaneously as horrific as David Cronenberg's darkest work. The fundamental problem that it addresses, as a satire, is the hypocrisy of the entertainment biz; while that's been spoken of many a time before, this film aims its attack squarely at the fact that supposedly progressive and enlightened Hollywood still harbors attitudes toward sex and aging so hideously retrograde as to make the most diehard alt-righter cringe. You are asked to imagine that somebody out there is offering a way to beat that disastrous system, a way to become once again the kind of person Hollywood wants you to be (especially if you're female) — young, fit and pretty. Although only for seven days at a time.

The premise is more fantasy than science fiction; no effort is made to explain how the Substance does what it does, and we never learn anything at all about the company behind it. But it's not long into this movie that the fantasy recedes and the real visceral body horror begins, starting at the moment when Demi Moore's character ties her arm up like a junkie and injects into it a clear, puke-green "ACTIVATOR" fluid that looks like something Herbert West might have cooked up — and the film never really lets up after that. The effects of her new addiction, as she begins flouting the simple but clear warnings provided, begin to pile up quickly... and with them some of the most incredible makeup and practical effects seen in horror in years, maybe even in decades. Seriously, Rob Bottin and Screaming Mad George would be proud of an achievement like this; everything on screen is stunningly imagined and conceived, and the sheer grotesqueness of what you're seeing just grows and swells until a literally explosive ending.

The acting by the two leads is award-worthy at all times, even when it's not naturalistic; this is arguably the greatest performance of Demi Moore's career, and the real-life subtext just adds depth to it. Moore and Margaret Qualley do a great deal of wordless, physical acting here that speaks volumes; as the film gets more and more outlandish, they never fail to sell it. The whole movie exists in a dreamlike heightened reality that feels practically Lynchian (or even Kubrickian), and some over-the-top performances by the supporting cast — especially a hilariously evil turn by Dennis Quaid — only add to that impression.

The characters' attitudes are some of the most pointed bits of the satire. What does Elisabeth Sparkle, a/k/a Sue, do with a second lease on life and youth? Does she go back into acting, start her career over, become an Oscar-caliber star once again? Fuck no, she just wants her TV show back, no matter how much she gets ogled for it. She has been put through the Hollywood meat grinder so hard that she can't think of a better idea; she doesn't want to be accomplished again, she only wants to be desirable and desired again. That is the only thing that gives her — Elisabeth or Sue — a sense of fulfillment. And she cannot feel desirable in her older body anymore: so much so that she stands up a date with a man who is genuinely in awe of her (the only such example in the entire film) because she can't make herself look the way she wants to look. No wonder her newly created double selves (which, the creators of the Substance remind her repeatedly and fruitlessly, are still only one person) begin to resent and act out against each other — Elisabeth is bitter that Sue is eclipsing her and achieving the kind of success she herself can now only dream about, and Sue despises having to go back to being Elisabeth every other week when all Elisabeth ever does is hide at home and veg out.

The Substance wears its influences on its sleeve: Cronenberg is only the most obvious point of reference, although you could probably throw Brian Yuzna, John Carpenter and Frank Henenlotter in there as well; the practical effects and makeup, as I've said, are stunningly imagined and conceived. The careful use of the camera, in combination with the incredibly detailed and vivid set design, suggests comparisons to Stanley Kubrick and maybe even Wes Anderson at his darkest. But I really can't think of anything to compare the last act of the film to. Some might call it drawn-out, but really the agony of it seeming like it would never end just added to the overall effect of pure dread. You keep wondering how it can possibly get worse, and then it gets far worse. The audience I saw The Substance with spent the last fifteen minutes laughing in horror, if there is such a thing; the whole ending sequence is simultaneously shocking, nauseating, cathartic, and hysterically funny.

This film does not aim to terrify or frighten, except after you leave the theater and start thinking about the real-life implications of it; there are no real jump scares except for a few Catapult Nightmares. What it really wants to do is horrify, quite a different proposition, and in that respect it succeeds wildly. The Substance is both very funny, in a Strangelovian sense, and profoundly disturbing — and I should say it deserves to be seen in a packed theater.

#movies #movie review #the substance #tw medical #tw mental health #tw g0re #tw body horror

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mail-me-a-snail · 10 months ago

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pls i hope you give us your Vance related PL thoughts one day <3 I’m sure he has a normal time of it

oh man. i could gush for hours about phantom liberty. dlcs dont usually engage me--the most "recent" exception having been destiny 2's last dlc with activision, forsaken--but phantom liberty gripped me by the membrane and throttled me within an inch of my life.

i mean, if it did that to me, imagine what it did to vance.

(spoilers follow)

it isn't 't the first time vance has gotten a holo from an unknown number.

that's the biz; most clients want secrecy. the private type don't trust fixers--they don't do middlemen. they cut straight to the point. vance has dealt with these kinds of clients before. they don't know the streets like he does; they don't give a shit to, either.

they give him the gist of what they want done; the finer details don't matter. job's a job--as long as he takes care of the gonk who needs flatlining, or klep whatever needs klepping, the scratch'll come through, no problem.

that's how it's supposed to go.

but songbird opens with this: she knows what's happening to him. she knows about the relic's slow poison; she knows about vance, who he was, is, and pretends to be; and she knows how to help.

the promise of a cure colors her tone, but she knows better than to make it here and now on the holo. so she asks vance to meet her at the gate to dogtown.

vance is fresh off a gig. he's maybe a kilometer from dogtown proper, can see the open, rounded top of the stadium peeking out from behind the buildings in the distance. black smoke rises over the skyline. seems there's always a fire in dogtown.

he had been nursing a cigarette on his bike--jackie's arch--when songbird had called him. he flicks what remains of the cigarette onto the pavement. grinds it out under his heel. he mounts the arch.

private-types always end up asking to meet at a secondary location.

this--this part of the routine that's been ingrained in him for the past year or so--he knows how to follow.

the malfunction tears through his parts with the precision of a ripper's scalpel.

it knows where to curl its long, electric-blue fingers in his internal wires. it knows how hard to tug; it doesn't stop, either. the force of it sours, taut, in the back of vance's throat.

the silver prongs connected to his spine rattle. they shake until they buzz--then that buzz sharpens into ringing. one constant note, ringing into eternity, rising without changing pitch.

it aches from within vance's very teeth. sits heavy on his useless tongue--the same tongue he fears that he'll end up biting during one of these seizures.

there was a time when the relic thought him still human. it's only recently that it's learned the true nature of its host. it's only recently that it's found out how much more it can feed on.

it's only recently that it's started affecting johnny, too.

he doesn't know how it happens--doesn't know if johnny's starting to share his pain, or if they're feeling each other's in a tenuous feedback loop.

either way, the relic is decaying, and it's taking them with it.

vance curls up against the nearest solid mass he can find; remembers he has to breathe; forgets, exactly, how to do that; reaches for johnny, who's seizing right in front of him--

and songbird reaches back.

she touches his shoulder. her hand carries no weight other than that of buzzing static. the sound bleeds into the malfunction's miasma of noise. she speaks, carefully, calmly, but whatever she says, the relic swallows.

her words seem to please it, however--because a few moments later, the malfunction trickles away. it leaves nothing in its wake but a bone-deep soreness and a few blue tessellations crackling across johnny's non-corporeal form.

the large lapels of songbird's jacket curl around her throat. beneath that and a number of colorful pins, she wears a rather nondescript netrunning suit in contrast. vance doesn't miss the cyberdeck attached to her hip.

she looks like any other runner. in fact, vance had traipsed around night city in something similar an eternity ago--only difference being the absence of his team colors of hexagonal red-and-black.

but she's got no symbols of her own. no iconography denoting her allegiance to any one patron. he would've taken her for one of the afterlife's enny-a-dozen netrunners, then--had it not been for the fact that she could see johnny.

she touches him, too. she grasps the ghost's shoulder as easily as if--as if...she were a ghost herself.

data crackles in vance's ear; it's not the relic's tell-tale, almost musical blue purr. he usually welcomes the sound because it means johnny's somewhere around him, some lame-ass quip ready to fall from his lips.

but this data is red and black and angry and alive.

it writhes; spits; it takes johnny with it.

for the first time in the past few months, vance's head falls quiet.

it's so quiet that the absence feels more like a cavity.

it aches like one, too.

she's not like any other runner, if she can do that.

the realization leaves him reeling with more than just the after-effects of a relic malfunction: it's got him dizzy with the idea that she's like him.

songbird doesn't win vance over by taking johnny away from him. he can feel her confusion with that underlying her every instruction, but she's got bigger things to worry about.

ask any of the techies from his arasaka days and they'd tell you this: vance is the last person to give a shit about the president of the NUSA.

he's not an NUSA citizen; he's especially not about to lick her heels just 'cause she used to run militech, either. his parents had fought in the war she had started all those years ago--it's in his corpo blood to hate her, or, at least, what she stands for.

but a job's a job, and song's not gonna give johnny up until vance swallows his pride.

he'll do as she says. he's got too much to lose not to.

that same red data plays with vance's surroundings as songbird talks to him. she props open doors; gets rusted old elevators groaning back to life; all from the relative safety of--wherever she is.

that takes skill. splitting himself in two like that--he could never pull that trick off, not for lack of trying.

granted, arasaka hadn't built him to be stationary. they had made sure he'd always be on the move. they had grafted an entire torso's worth of realskinn onto him so his machine parts could breathe in the cool, polluted air of night city as he ran through its gutter-like streets.

and that living data--it's as bright as copper and just as conducive; it carries with it that same, rotting taste. it's not just any fancy code. it's not even something that could be called a runner's signature; calling it that would imply it's likely to allow someone ownership.

that code isn't just black with ICE--it is ICE. it's several layers of thick, hostile ICE.

vance had only seen such a thing in cyberspace. way out there, lurking on the horizon, ever-present and closely guarded.

(because of the highly personalized nature of cyberspace, perhaps vance had invited it to stay).

even with his pull in arasaka's ranks, neither the techies or netwatch would've ever let him touch the blackwall.

but song's got it eating out of the palm of her hand.

...which means rosalind myer's been keeping what she doesn't understand on a leash for the past decade, and no one's been the wiser.

not even arasaka.

later, when he looks rosalind in the eye as he digs the tracker out of her neck--his touch comes too soft for someone like her, he realizes, though he doesn't do so on purpose--he wonders if she knows who, or what, he is.

if, if she does, then she must know what arasaka had intended him to be--why wouldn't she, after all, when song had been the one to order him after her?

johnny fills their first night in dogtown with doubt.

"this a normal tuesday for ya, v?" he asks vance. the ghost sits backwards on a rusted old folding chair in front of him. "savin' the skin of the fuckin' president of the NUSA?"

"sure," vance answers. he can't sleep. hasn't tried.

they both listen to myers breathing on the next mattress over for few moments.

then, he continues, quieter this time. "way things'll be goin', seems we're punchin' hansen's ticket same time next week."

johnny rests his chin on his crossed arms. his chrome arm gleams in the low, blue light coming from what could generously be called a window.

"think you're gonna be outta here that fast?" johnny shakes his head. "ain't how quick myers and her ilk operate."

"bureaucracy, that it? gotta wait for the paperwork to zero hansen?"

(he's not a stranger to the concept, but he had figured he had left that sort of thing behind.)

the ghost hums as the thought passes through their shared subconscious.

"'s not the NUSA tellin' ya to zero 'im. that's how they do biz: they get an idea in your head, and--'fore ya know it--they're washing their hands of you."

vance sighs; one long, full body sigh, broad shoulders rising and falling with it. this scop again.

he eases backwards into the mattress that he sits on. a spring digs against his back. he runs his hands down his face; the monowire pads pressed into his palms are marble smooth on his cheeks. he sets his hands on his chest.

data purrs--relic blue, this time--as johnny manifests beside him.

the latter turns his head to the former. johnny's eyes remain on the ceiling; his features are hard to discern from the stark shadows falling across his face. his long hair fans out around him. it's easy to forget, sometimes, especially in quiet moments like this, that johnny isn't even really there.

vance takes the illusion as it is, without question, and follows johnny's eyes to the popcorned ceiling.

"don't doubt you know what you're talkin' about," vance offers.

"but you're still gonna help 'er," johnny counters, quickly.

"mmhmm."

he makes a show of sighing. "why am i not surprised?"

"'cause you'd do the same."

"bullshit."

"so, yer sayin'--" vance props himself up on one elbow, dog tags coming to dangle around his neck-- "that even if there's a pretty damn real possibility of gettin' you off the relic--

"--big fuckin' if, don't ya think--"

"--you ain't even gonna stick around to find out if it's true?"

"there it is again--if, v, if."

"but what if it is true?" vance tips his head. "what if song really could help us?"

johnny finally looks at him. his lips are pressed into a thin line; he's not pleased. "what the hell was it that i just said, v? they get an idea in yer head--"

"--then they wash their hands of ya. i know." he lies back down, the motion a concession in and of itself. "heard ya the first time."

"ya got too much hope than what's good for ya, v." johnny turns on his side to face him. "'s how they get their claws in you. promise you one thing, quid-pro-quo, and they'll lead you down a shithole of your own makin'. just can't see how far you've dug yourself 'til you're lookin' up from rock bottom."

"fuck," vance breathes, amused. he meets johnny's eyes with a grin. "run that last line by me one more time, johnny--gotta make sure i got it down for the silverhand doctrine."

"oh--" johnny laughs, dry but warm-- "fuck off, v."

vance meets reed in the following days; he had almost missed the pressure of a gun nestling between his ribs. then, alex, if that really is her name this time.

he sees how the years between them have soured--both the time they had spent on the field together, and the time they had spent apart afterwards.

he learns how song had betrayed reed--on rosalind's orders.

just how far does the shithole go?

can't answer that without stopping to look up.

and they can't stop, not yet; hansen's playing diplomat with night city's brightest and boldest, songbird's in her cage, and the black sapphire's looking like the place to be.

vance doesn't miss johnny's glance over--doesn't miss how quickly johnny looks away when he catches the ghost staring, either.

the shell of johnny's ear and the red piercings clipped into the cartilage face vance. the latter pale in comparison to the blush dusting johnny's scruffy cheek.

vance sidles up to him--away from reed's eyes--and leans into his space. the black mesh stretching across his stomach and chest whispers with the motion. it's soft against his exposed skin. he tucks his hands behind his back.

"like what you see?" vance teases, in a murmur.

johnny finds the sea of other brightly colored guests very interesting all of a sudden. he's so intrigued by them that he doesn't dignify vance's question with a response.

it's at the black sapphire that vance sees so mi for what she really is: little of flesh, all machine. myers had not done for song what arasaka had done for vance; she hadn't deigned to hide the true nature of her prize netrunner.

white, block letters run up song's spine and spell MILITECH. myers hadn't bothered hide the mark of her allegiance, either.

or, perhaps, the mark of her owner.

embossed letters spell ARASAKA on vance's innermost machine parts. when he sees song's back for the first time, he swears he can almost feel those letters start to itch.

even after vance learned what song had done to reed; had learned how far she was willing to go; how much she was willing to give; he would have never turned her in.

it's not because reed and alex had needlessly killed the two netrunners they had stolen the identities of. it's not because reed makes his skin crawl, reminding him too much of white, sterile clinics and martyr-like vows of loyalty and the absence of a worthwhile life outside of bureaucratic routine. it's not because of so mi's promise to help him, either.

he doesn't turn her in because if it had been him in her shoes--and it could've very easily turned out that way for him, had arasaka pushed him a little farther--he would've done anything to be free, too.

she is not like him--that implies they're on equal footing.

no, she is exactly what arasaka had wanted. she is what they had spent ten years trying to (unknowingly) replicate. she is the perfection of red and black and angry and alive data.

she had existed this whole time--and vance had had no idea.

he and johnny have a bond that goes beyond flesh and bone and chrome. if there's ever a day where they're finally separated, vance will think that separation only superficial.

but vance and songbird...

songbird is the netrunner vance would've been had arasaka kept going. if they hadn't resigned to throwing him out when they deemed him "obsolete".

if song hadn't chipped through the blackwall of her own volition--would rosalind myers, former ceo of arasaka's rival company militech, still have kept her around?

if vance had gone against arasaka's wishes and interacted with the blackwall--would they have called him obsolete?

would he have even met johnny? so mi?

how deep would they have been willing to dig themselves if it meant having a chance at survival?

it's like johnny had said--can't answer that without looking up from rock bottom.

but all vance sees is song leaving him behind; all he sees is the promise she had never truly made; all he sees are stars.

#asks #vance #OH MAN THIS GOT SO LONG. IF YOU MADE IT THIS FAR THANK YOU FOR READING #BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST SORRY I GOT REALLY AUTISTIC.#WHOOOWEEE #my writing #im so fuckign eeped up man #phantom liberty #phantom liberty spoilers

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