#autobot cake

[exasperatedoctopus]

Animated Megatron’s god-tier Yes-And game slays me every time. No wonder this guy has successfully Warlord-ed his way through millenia, literally anything can happen to him and he just spin-doctor’s his way to victory

[singingcicadas]

"Rodimus joining the Autobots in Autocracy and being supportive of Optimus makes no sense and is just an example of successful Autobot propaganda b/c he's been exposed to Autobot crimes his whole life and the Autobots forced him to bomb Nyon" will forever be a wild take to me cuz his complete reasoning process is pretty clearly spelled out in the comic? It's like, the main focal point of his entire screentime in Autocracy. For Rodimus there's never been any confusion about the perpetrator behind the "Autobot crimes". There’s Zeta’s crimes and there’s Orion. With a massive distinction between the two. With said distinction being extremely important, because one the first things he says to Orion is literally:

And why does he believe that Orion's different? Because of Orion's speech to the Senate.

Guess what was in that speech:

The origin of the Autobot name. Orion's idealized vision of the freedom and autonomy that the name was meant to represent. Rodimus knew what the true Autobot values were intended to be before the government took the name for their own purposes, and he identified with those values enough to straight up put his life into Orion's hands:

Not just his own life. Everyone in the Acropolex. Everyone in Nyon. Betting on nothing but Orion's conscience. Why would he do this if he didn't already believe Orion to be a good person worthy of a gamble on his trust? If he didn't believe that Orion still held true to his words in the Senate? He knows that Zeta's out for his blood, that Zeta cares nothing about his citizens except bleeding them dry. He's always known the true depths of government atrocities, he lived in the worst of it his whole life. It's why he wired the whole city with bombs as contingency, he always knew it would come down to something like this. But if he thought that Zeta and Orion were no different for their part in the "Autobot crimes", then why would he take Orion to the Acropolex, to see the most vulnerable suffering of their people, and expect him to care enough to side with them against his own government?

Even on the brink of being forced to destroy his own home he's still very aware of who's the real enemy here. After their meeting he's certain that Orion's Autobots are on his side, it was their diversion that bought them enough time to get himself and the few he could out of detonation range. Zeta wants to kill all of them; they're all victims here. Rodimus never blamed Nyon's destruction on anyone other than Zeta, least of all Orion's group.

Imo this... is a completely appropriate and empathetic response to Rodimus' grief? like he does make leadership sound all doom and gloom but it is an accurate reflection of Rodimus' feelings (as well as his own) and he's telling Rodimus that it's okay to feel that way b/c he feels like that too!

The "you faced an impossible situation" bit is just stating the plain truth. Orion isn't condoning or condemning Rodimus' decision, it's not his place to do so. He wasn't the one forced into making the choice, Rodimus was. Rodimus made his choice and now has to live with it. Orion could only offer understanding. like idk what else he could have said, it's not even his place to offer absolution, because even though Rodimus feels guilty he doesn't regret anything. When he defended himself to Bumblebee he used the exact same words Orion did: he did what he had to do.

If the trust he placed in Orion before in the Acropolex was a wild bid in the face of desperation, then the trust that he's placing in Orion now—admitting his guilt and grief, showing vulnerability—is purely of his own choice. To which Orion reciprocated by revealing the weight of his own burdens. This is the kind of interaction that friends share. Which means they're friends now. Is it so unreasonable for Rodimus to want to follow the leadership of a friend, someone whose speech against the Senate that he'd admired, someone who he believed to be different and proved himself as worthy of his trust, someone who he fought beside and saved each other's lives and shared his desire for peace?

Claiming that Rodimus would be averse against joining the Autobots due to their past complicity in crimes under Zeta is vastly misunderstanding his character b/c he's not the type of person who thinks like that. Like for one thing he'd never let historical grudges get in the way of progressing towards a better future (think Lost Light and Megatron). It also completely misses the point of his scene with Orion in the Acropolex, which is about believing the best in people and making the right choices going forward when presented with past mistakes. Also Rodimus isn't stupid he's well aware that Zeta's Autobot cause and Orion's Autobot cause are two completely different things. The first thing Optimus did after becoming Prime was to renounce the old government. Being an Autobot under Optimus would be restoring honour and integrity to the name. if anything that should come off as extra appealing to him cuz he likes restoring stuff like Cyberutopia and the Golden Age.

"Rodimus should join the Decepticons" makes even less sense. Rodimus does come onscreen as an established Decepticon sympathizer but if you think about it his contact with Decepticons is limited to them providing him with weapon supplies. It's a vendor-patron relationship and their goal is to overthrow the government with propaganda keywords being "freedom" "equality" "emancipation" of course he would be a sympathizer. It's a noble cause if looked at from afar. But once the events of Nyon happens he's suddenly forced to get all up and close with Megatron and his higher-ups. and what does he see.

This is how Megatron fought Zeta:

This is what Megatron did to Orion:

This is how Decepticons treat their allies, right after announcing public amnesty:

This is Megatron's opinion of Zeta, after everything he did:

This is Megatron's idea of entertainment:

After seeing all that, isn't it perfectly natural for Rodimus to arrive at this conclusion regarding Megatron and the Decepticons:

Oh my god I can't believe I ever trusted these thugs.

Now that he's seen for himself that the Decepticons are the opposite of freedom, Orion trying to arrest Swindle at the beginning of the comic would have made sense to him. He now gets why they were fighting the Decepticons so hard.

That's basically the whole thought process for Rodimus joining the Autobots. The logic's pretty sound. There's no "Autobot propaganda" involved anywhere. Rodimus was the one who sought Orion out to make him choose his side. Rodimus was the one who rescued the Autobots from Megatron. Rodimus was the one who asked to join. The Autobots never tried to recruit him.

[autobot2001]

Baking Class

Author: Autobot2001 Henre: Fanfiction Fandom: Transformers Rating: E Warnings: None Pairing: Drift X Jamie (OC) Description: Drift takes Jamie to the bakery for a baking class.

Day 15; @fluffyfebruary: craft @fluffbruary: cord | bakery | honey

Drift found out the local bakery is having a baking class. He’s worried that the class will be baking something Jamie doesn’t like, but he thinks it’ll be fun. Jamie still wants to go to the bakery, even though there are still cookies they bought two days ago.

The two go to the bakery at two the next day. There are three other couples joining the class. The class is making banana date cake with walnuts and honey glaze. “That sounds good,* Drift comments, “we can bring the cake home.”

The two follow the instructions. Putting the first six ingredients in the mixing bowl. Jamie plugs in the hand-held mixer, but it won’t turn on. The cord is damaged. “I’m sorry, but we don’t have another,” the instructor apologizes. The instructor is ready to offer a refund and coupon for another class, but their two students aren’t bothered by having to mix with a wooden spoon. It’s easy for Drift to mix with the wooden spoon.

Once everything is mixed, it’s time to mash bananas and chop the dates. Drift cannot keep Jamie from using her hands to mash the bananas. “Now your hands are a mess,” Drift comments, “go wash them. I’ll chop the dates.” Once the cakes are baking, everyone is dismissed for nintey minutes. By then, the cakes should be ready for glazing.

two hours pass, and everyone has a nice looking cake. Drift and Jamie want to wait until they get home and share with friends. First, the two get dinner.

Drift tries to get Jamie to talk about the class but is unsuccessful. He struggled not to let his mind worry about Jamie’s mental health and why conversation is challenging for her.

When the two get home, they share the cake with their friends. Only two of the eight slices remain, but only because Drift and Jamie shared a slice. The two want to save one slice for Lightning. “So, who do I fight for the last slice?” Sideswipe asks. “No one, that is Drift and Jamie’s,” Sunstreaker argues. Everyone liked the cake and hope Drift and Jamie will make it again.

[shibbydog]

Swiss roll and custard :)

[penny-anna]

G1 megops wedding episode

Exterior: Autobot base

Megatron: Autobots! lay down your weapons. I didn't come here to fight.

Optimus: then what do you want, Megatron?

Megatron: I grow weary of this war. I propose a truce - in accordance with the ancient laws of Cybertron.

*Autobots all gasp*

Spike: what does that mean?

Bumblebee: under the ancient law, a war can be conclusively ended by the leaders of the opposing sides getting married

Spike: oh wow!

Prowl: Optimus, don't listen to him, this is very obviously a trap

Optimus: you're probably right, Prowl, but if there's even the slightest chance of ending this ceaseless war, I must take it.

Optimus: very well, Megatron! I accept.

Interior: Decepticon base

(Megatron is being pinned into a bridal gown by the Constructicons)

Megatron: excellent. everything is going according to my plan. as soon as Optimus and I are wed, we will attack the Autobots. in accordance with the ancient law they will be unwilling to attack their leader's husband so I will defeat them easily. and then I will rule the universe!

Starscream: you know, Megatron, as your maid of honour, I think roses would be a more elegant choice for the bouquet than lillies

Megatron: we're planning an ambush, Starscream, I don't care about the flowers

Starscream: look I just think if we're going to do this we should do it properly

Starscream: and can I just say, as your maid of honour, you have a lot of cheek wearing white!

Interior: Autobot medbay

Optimus: Ratchet, I need to talk to you about the wedding

Ratchet: oh it's about time. Optimus I trust your judgement and all but this whole thing is completely -

Optimus: will you be my best man

Ratchet:

Ratchet, audibly choked up: it would be my honour

Exterior: blasted wilderness

(The wedding party is assembled. Optimus Prime is wearing a tuxedo jacket and bowtie and is standing with his best man and 2 of his groomsmen) (Jazz & Prowl, also wearing bowties)

(Rumble is coming down the aisle. he is the flower girl and he is taking his job very seriously. both the Autobot and Decepticon sides are getting pelted aggressively with flowers)

Sparkplug Witwicky: remind me again why I'm officiating?

Ratchet: well you're a neutral party

Sparkplug: ah this is all pretty weird

Jazz: I wonder where Bumblebee and Spike are? they wouldn't want to miss the ceremony

(Soundwave begins blasting an approximation of the wedding march as Megatron walks down the aisle with his maid of honour (Starscream) and bridesmaids (Skywarp & Thundercracker)

Sparkplug: uh okay. dearly beloved -

Megatron: you don't have to do the whole preamble, human. Ravage! the rings!!

(Ravage comes over with the rings in his mouth)

Megatron: now, with this ring I thee -

(Bumblebee comes racing over to the wedding party. Spike leaps out)

Spike: stop, stop!

Bumblebee: we object!

Spike: you can't go ahead with the wedding! Megatron is already married, and we can prove it!

Megatron:

Optimus:

Ratchet:

Megatron: Starscream you told me you got the divorce finalised

Starscream: I thought you were doing that. weren't you doing that?

Megatron: how are you this incompetent

Rumble: wait so does this mean we aren't ambushing the Autobots

Megatron:

Rumble: well are we?

Optimus:

Megatron: oh let's just skip it all - Decepticons, attack!

Interior: Autobot headquarters

(The humans are eating wedding cake)

Spike: well at least we got cake?

Bumblebee: yeah this could have gone worse

Carly: I thought it was a lovely ceremony up until all the violence

Jazz: at least this way you don't have to spend the rest of your life married to that bum Megatron. right, Optimus?

(Optimus is looking sadly at his wedding ring)

Optimus: yes. that's right.

(roll credits)

[creammints]

Autobot Wheelie is but a child, his purchasing power is fairly mild.

Though when he's out with his dear friend Blurr the price of cake he need not confer!

--------------------------------------------------------

My @secretsolenoid-revived piece for @thenamesblurrito

[transformers-spike]

Out of all the TFP Decepticons (or even the Autobots), who do you think would want the most kids with their (female) human significant other?

Man this gets even better if we interpret this as a complete genetic fuckery where the bots aren't even supposed to reproduce this way Megatron is the type who wants to have a cake and eat it too, so you know his greedy ass wants more than one kid. But for now he's distracted trying to figure out how parenting works and making sure he doesn't crush his extra small offspring. Watch him invent Cybertronian nepotism Starscream uh... probably won't make a good dad, and this goes beyond the whole "being a parent isn't really a thing on Cybertron". He just wants the glory of "discovering" this new mode of reproduction. Parenthood freaks him out. Keep it to one kid, whose life he will be absent from Soundwave wouldn't mind more than one offspring - but have fun being a single parent if he sacrifices himself for Megatron's sake. And if his Lord wants you studied (as long as it doesn't kill you), he will accept on your behalf (Soundwave, you bitch) Shockwave wants would want more kids, but in the name of science. Now watch him enact the most terrifying experiments on other humans (or even his own) and terminate the pregnancies earlier just to study the developmental stages. Knock Out and Breakdown would probably be the only ones able to co-parent even if the other's offspring isn't technically theirs. Even if this doesn't start off as a throuple, it soon becomes one. This will probably lead to a whole "Escaping the Decepticons" plotline because Megatron will want to have tests run on the human and the offspring... Airachnid is... definitely up there when it comes to wanting more offsprings. Seeing how detached she is from others of her own kind, I feel like she will see this as an opportunity to manipulate her kids into trusting her completely and doing her bidding as they grow up. Like making your own child army... just like a real spider-parent. At this point, just go for Dreadwing. I may be influenced by my "Tell me it's alright to cry" fic, but as long as he gets away from the Decepticons he's going to adopt his human's children. He is not coping well with his trauma, so what better thing to do than adopt a bunch of human offspring in the middle of his worst depressive episode? Anyway, if he makes even 1 child with his partner, he's going to be extremely anxious and protective of it. Think of this:

[sparkleresthold]

I'd like that

-Many characters had their baseline colors before the war took place. Once the Autobots won (and directly because of their methods) Cybertron was plunged into a permanent nuclear winter and muted colors became the norm to those who could afford them, usually bots. Everything is either rusting away, flaking or caked in soot, blacks and grays just hide it better.

-Skyfire was initially Starscream's tutor once the latter picked up an interest in Science, he's slightly older than him, but still a kid when they met. They became friends right away.

-Starscream was quite sheltered, and coming from a privileged clan, he hadn't really seen much of the city he was supposed to command one day. Skyfire would help him sneak out every so often, showing him the good and the bad taking place in Vos.

- Skyfire would gently suggest to Starscream that perhaps some of the morals he was taught by Slipstream were wrong. That they weren't inherently better than other frames because they could fly or because they were Vosian, among many other things. Starscream was making some progress on questioning what he considered to be "normal and factual" before the war separated them.

-They would both talk at length about their dreams for the future and even the prospect of exploring Cybertron and beyond, together. In the present, Skyfire still clings onto hope that they might find each other one day.

[blade-liger-4ever]

Why I feel Jack Darby isn't like Orion Pax/Optimus Prime

This is probably not gonna do me any favors in the wider Transformers community, but that's fine; I don't want to be in the good graces of half those people. Besides, I've grown to really dislike Jack over the years, and now that there's a new TF film that actually shows us Optimus and Megatron's past that has everyone cheering, I can actually cite that film in my argument should I encounter any whiners.

Fair warning, this will not be in Jack's favor.

So, as we see of him in Transformers: Prime, Jack had a really poor life. His dad is missing for reasons unknown, his mother is working herself to the bone to keep the roof over their heads, and Jack himself is working a horrid job to try and lift some of the burden from her shoulders. A standard modern day life for teenage boys, right? Oh, and don't forget him going all gaga over prissy cheerleader Sierra; that's of course the icing on the cake of this cut and dry trope, because the loser boy has to have a thing for the social climber girl who he can't recognize as trouble.

However, when he crashes into the Autobot-Decepticon War, Jack is adamant against getting involved. He whines about his new lot in life, complains that he just wants "a normal life", and overall is ungrateful to the Autobots that saved his skin a short time ago. Yes, he pulled through in the five part premiere and did so at other points in the first and even second seasons - but those were all life or death situations.

Every other time, Jack caved to peer pressure and stayed inside the lines. He never stood up to the school bully, let himself get embarrassed by said bully in front of Sierra, and then broke his deal with Arcee by going to an underground race. Heck, if you ask me, the only reason he helped save the bully in that episode was because Jack didn't want to have a dead guy on his conscience. Sure he said "it's the right thing", but where was that nobility when you were ogling your crush throughout the episode, hm?

And to say that he's like Orion Pax after all of the above is an insult to Orion and Optimus' integrity. Can you truly see Optimus whining over his lot in life, being spiteful and rude to guys who were mean to him specifically and not his friends, or just losing brain cells when a pretty girl is involved and getting himself into trouble in a misguided attempt to impress her?

No.

Orion/Optimus would never do that. He'll take the hits to himself and make the best of it with a smile on his face, he'll fight for his friends rather than himself alone, and even if he's head over heels for Ariel/Elita One, he won't compromise himself or his morals just to impress her. Orion/Optimus is better than that, and would never stoop to such actions.

But you know who would do all of that?

This guy.

As TF One shows, Megatron in his youth was much like - gasp - Jack Darby. They both kept their heads low to avoid further ridicule and pain, they never wandered outside the lines for fear of the unknown/repercussions, and despite advocating for a change or better life, they didn't really lift a finger to do that. They both needed an outside force to push them onto a new path. And they both ended up having a low chance of heroism when there was pressure on them: Jack's was anytime Sierra or Vince the Bully was involved, and Megatron's was when the 'Bot responsible for ruining his life and all of Cybertron's population was at his mercy.

Speaking of, what are the odds Jack would have a similar reaction to meeting his father? Yeah sure, he spared Megatron in S1, but Megatron also taunted him by asking what Optimus' response would be if he killed him. Put Jack in a position where he gets to beat up his dad, and are we sure that Optimus would still have that sway over him?

Just ask Sentinel, he can tell you how well that turned out when Orion Pax tried talking down D-16 - oh wait, you can't, because D-16 killed him.

Honestly, there are far more similarities between Jack and Megatron than Jack and Optimus. I'm tired of Jack getting all the love and being heralded as Orion-like or Optimus-like when he never was. He's far closer to Megatron, and if I'm the only one who can see that, fine. I don't care.

These are my observations, my beliefs, and I'm sticking with them.

Now on the same token (but coming later), Smokescreen actually has more in common with Orion Pax/Optimus Prime, something the new TF flick has shown, even if I disapprove of a chunk of the writing and characterization in it. But, given I'm probably setting some people's hair on fire, I'll leave you alone for now to digest this post.

Good day, and remember:

"Autobots, transform and roll out!"

[random-fandom1984]

MASTER LIST

Request are open!

ALLOWED:

●Fluff ●Yandere ●Angst ●Crossovers ●Character x Reader ●Character x Character ●References to other fandoms ●Comfort ●Headcanons ●Reader/Character from one dimension/universe getting sent to a different one (tfp x tfa, trollhunters x zak storm, etc)

●others to be added

NOT ALLOWED:

●NSFW ●Pedophilia ●Incest ●Certain sensitive topics (rape, abuse, etc) ●Other's OC's (I don't have the confidence to do that)

I also have a master list of poems I'm making

Poems Master List

FANDOMS

Transformers

Tfa:

General: - Predacon! Reader in TFA

Optimus Prime - Wattpad Story: Deadly Voice - Yandere! TFP! & TFA! Optimus x Chubby! Gn Reader Ratchet Prowl Bumblebee Bulkhead Jazz Jettwins Ultra Magnus Megatron Starscream (+clones) Lugnut Blitzwing Blackarachnia/Elita-1 Grimlock Wreck-Gar Soundwave Longarm Prime/Shockwave - All It Takes Is A Potion to Show How Much I'm Obsessed With You Wasp/Waspinator

Tfp:

Optimus Prime - Yandere TFP! & TFA! Optimus x Chubby! Gn Reader Ratchet Arcee Cliffjumper Smokescreen Bumblebee - Bumblebee x SG! Cybertronian Reader Bulkhead Wheeljack Ultra Magnus Megatron - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Starscream - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Soundwave - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Shockwave - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Predaking - Decepticons Meets Sparklings 5t3v3(Steve) - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Knockout - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Breakdown - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Dreadwing - Decepticons Meets Sparklings Arachnid Unicron

Tfe

Optimus - Sparklings Megatron - Sparklings Bumblebee - Sparklings Elita-1 - Sparklings Soundwave - Sparklings Shockwave - Sparklings Tarantulas - Sparklings Terrans(PLATONIC ONLY) Swindle Starscream

Tfg1

Optimus Prime - Calling Optimus Prime Dad Prowl Jazz Bumblebee Ratchet Megatron Starscream Skywarp Thundercracker Reflector Soundwave - Soundwave x Cybertronian Reader Part 1 -Clinging to Sanity or Embrace the Fantasy (Yandere! Platonic! Soundwave + teenager! Reader) Shockwave Grimlock Unicron Other Autobots and Decepticons

Tfbw

Optimus Primal Rattrap Rhinox Cheetor -His Sea Goddess (Cheetor x Cybertronian Reader with an Octopus alt-mode) Dinobot Megatron Tarantulas Waspinator

Tfrid2015

Bumblebee Sideswipe Strongarm Fix-it Grimlock Drift Steeljaw Thunderhoof Fracture Underbite Saberhorn

TF1

Orion Pax/Optimus Prime D-16/Megatron B-127/Bumblebee Elita-1 Starscream Soundwave Shockwave Sentinel Prime

LEGO MONKIE KID

Mk Mei Red Son Jin & Yin Spider Queen Azure Lion Macaque Sun Wukong Nezha Syntax Huntsman Goliath (Strong Spider) Peng Lady Bone Demon Not Mayor

ZAK STORM

Zak Storm (PLATONIC ONLY) Cece Crogar Clovis (PLATONIC ONLY) Caramba (PLATONIC ONLY) Calabrass (PLATONIC ONLY) Golden Bones

Trollhunters/3Below/Wizards

Angor Rot Gunmar Bular Aaarrrgghh Blinky (Blinkous) Nomura Draal Krel Tarron & Aja Tarron (PLATONIC ONLY) Varvatos Tronos Madu Zadra Zeron Alpha Nari Skrael Bellroc

Cookie Run Kingdom

Gingerbrave (PLATONIC ONLY) Wizard Cookie (PLATONIC ONLY) Strawberry Cookie (PLATONIC ONLY) Custard Cookie Ⅲ (PLATONIC ONLY) Chili Pepper Cookie Licorice Cookie Poison Mushroom Cookie (PLATONIC ONLY) Dark Choco Cookie Red Velvet Cookie Pomegranate Cookie Dark Enchantress Cookie Pure Vanilla Cookie White Lily Cookie Hollyberry Cookie Golden Cheese Cookie Dark Cacao Cookie Princess Cookie (PLATONIC ONLY) Knight Cookie (PLANTONIC ONLY) Caramel Arrow Cookie Crunchy Chip Cookie Affogato Cookie Captain Caviar Cookie Black Pearl Cookie/White Pearl Cookie Shadow Milk Cookie Mystic Flour Cookie

Others to be added

Adventure Time: Fionna & Cake

Fionna Cake (PLATONIC ONLY) Gary Marshall Lee Scarab Prismo Simon (PLATONIC ONLY) Marceline (Vampireworld version) Bonnibell Bubblegum (Vampireworld version)

WHEN REQUESTING (More rules will be added later):

●Include the fact whether or not your request is platonic or romantic; If romantic, is Y/n or character in a relationship, and if not, who is the romantic interest(s)?

●Give me some of the plot of what you're thinking for your request. If you don't, and I don't know what you want it to be about, or I can't think of what to make up- Example:

Optimus x Reader. Angst. Reader is male.

I don't know what the plot should be, or what it should involve. Like, if it's good enough that I can think of what it could be, then yeah, sure, but that will be a rare chance with me. But if it's like this- Example:

Aaarrrgghh x Reader. Comfort. Basically, the reader has had a bad day at work/school, and the two of them just cuddle and enjoy the silence in each other's arms, slowly falling asleep.

Then I will be able to think of how it can go because you gave me what you want to include in your request, but now how, I will be able to get behind that.

● I can make the reader be based off of another character, like- Examples:

-Vox! Reader in Trollhunters

-Reader as Ratchet's little sister in Transformers: Generation 1

Anything! Whatever you want as long as it's allowed.

●If your request involves something that isn't allowed, then it will be ignored.

That's everything for now! Request away!

[lomlhwa]

you're such a nerd (j.ww)

pairing: tutor!wonwoo x student!reader

preview: you really need to pass biology so you asked your teacher to hook you up with a tutor. now, he didn't expect you to literally hook up with your tutor. how could you not? he looks so cute in his glasses.

tags/warnings: fem reader, some biology terms, reader is kinda obsessed with wonu's glasses, voice kink on the reader's part, praise, pet names (baby, baby girl, baby cakes, good girl) academic rewarding, light choking, like one spank, semi-public sex, unprotected penetration (wrap it before you tap it), m & f orgasm

trigger warnings: n/a

wc: 1.4k

song recs for this fic: light a flame by seventeen, kiss me if you can by the boyz, die for you by the weeknd

a/n: can you tell i have a thing for men in glasses? you'll be able to tell as soon as you start reading this fic. also every time i wrote about those roll-y chairs my brain went "AUTOBOTS, ROLL OUT"

then….

“mr. kim i really need to pass your class. are there any students you could hook me up with to tutor me?” you gave your professor your very best puppy dog eyes.

you’re borderline failing this man’s class. a class you need to pass to get your degree. a class you willingly signed up for and you pay money for.

“yeah there is. wait here” he walks away into his office. you hear him pick up his landline phone and dial a number. you take a seat on one of the stools at the counter. 

“he’s on his way. we’ll wait for him.”

about 15 minutes pass before a tall, nerdy looking boy bursts through the door. he almost tumbles over, the handful of books in his hands almost toppling out. he’s adorable. but the cutest thing about him is his circle glasses that he’s pressed back up his nose at least three times already. 

“you said you want me to tutor a student, mr. kim?” he sounds out of breath. did he run all the way here from his dorm? “yes. this is y/n. she’s failing this class and wants some help” your teacher turns to you. “y/n, this is your tutor.” your new tutor waves at you.

“hi, i’m wonwoo. jeon wonwoo.” 

god, his voice. you’re gonna love being his student.

now….

“wonwoo, i don’t get this” you hold up your worksheet to your tutor. over the past couple weeks, you could say you’ve grown close with him. quite close.

“okay, put your listening ears on baby cakes” he rolls his chair over to you. his unhooks his glasses from the collar of his shirt, sliding them up his beautiful nose. 

“so, a chromosomal mutation is a mutation involving a long segment of dna. these mutations can involve deletions, insertions, inversions, or translocations of sections or segments of dna” you nod, trying your best to pay attention. “...and in some cases, deleted portions may attach to other chromosomes, disrupting both the chromosomes losing the dna and the one gaining it.” you nod again, the movement being so mindless.

“you won’t pass bio if you keep zoning out like that. i just explained chromosomal mutation and you weren’t listening. that was your one shot, baby girl” he flicks you lightly on the forehead before rolling away again. 

“no no no, one more time wonwoo” you roll yourself over to him and pull him back to your desk. he rolls his eyes and playfully tries to pull himself away from you. “i already explained it to you though” you manage to pull him back and he pouts. 

“one last time” you push your worksheet towards him. “explain it differently this time. like a chromosomal mutation remix” you giggle. 

“ugh okay so, chromosomal mutations can result from errors in dna replication during cell division, exposure to mutagens or a viral infection” you nod, actually listening this time. watching his plump lips move helped you really listen in. “...and chromosome abnormalities often happen due to errors during dividing of sex cells, meiosis or errors during dividing of other cells, mitosis.” 

“okay, now do your worksheet” he slides it back over to you. you expect him to roll away from you, but he doesn’t. he hovers next to you, inspecting your answers. you don’t notice at first, but his hand slowly trails up your thigh.

when you finally realize, it’s because it slides all the way back down to your knee. you erase your previously written answer and try something else. it must’ve been right because his hand moved up again. you figured out his system. 

wrong answer? hand back down at the knee. right answer? hand moves up and under your tennis skirt. 

you finally get to the last question; a question about the cause of chromosome abnormalities. unfortunately, you’re blanking at what wonwoo told you. his hand had fully come up to your core and he had been playing with your clit over your panties for the past 10 minutes. your brain was becoming hazy. 

“i taught you this less than an hour ago, baby girl. if you get this right, i’ll let you cum. come on, it’s the last question” your breathing hitched and you nod. you focus in and try and remember the answer. you write down your answer and wonwoo pounces on you. 

he mashes your lips together in a rough, sloppy kiss. he licks over your bottom lip and you open your mouth instinctively. a loud whine leaves your throat as his hand keeps it’s ministrations going.

“cum for me baby. you did so well” his mouth leaves yours and trails wet kisses all over your throat. he breathes heaving in your ear, his other hand coming up to push his glasses up.

“please, ah, please keep talking” you whine, shifting uncomfortably in your chair. “i need your voice.” he smirks at you. he knew his voice was nice. but the fact that it’s helping you get off? that was amazing to him.

“come on, baby girl. you deserve it. you’re doing so well for me. my good, sweet girl”  the mix of his heavy breathing, his sweaty musk and his words sends you over the edge. your hand flies down to his wrist to slow him down. “there you go, that’s it. that’s my good girl.” 

you lean your head back on the chair, catching your breath. he picks you up out of your chair, flipping you around and bending you over. the coldness of the desk on your arms shocks you and you jolt a little. 

“god, baby. you look so pretty in your little skirt” he says as he flips it up. he takes his glasses off and places them on the table. “no no no, please, keep them on. you look so good with them on” you beg. “you can’t even see me” he laughs. you hand them back to him, turning at the waist to glance at him. “just do it.”

he slides his glasses back up his nose and sighs. he pulls your panties down to your mid-thighs. he pulls his pants down the same length on his own legs. “i would really like to have you screaming my name, but we are kind of in public. i’m gonna need you to be quiet.” 

out of nowhere, he plants a hard spank on your now exposed ass. you squeal, your hand coming up to cover your mouth. “knew you’d like that, baby” he teases. he palms his length and teases your hole with his tip. 

he rests his hands on your hips as he pushes into you, his pelvis meeting with your ass. he lets out a deep breath, one of his hands falling on the desk next to your ribs. “fuck, my god baby girl” his voice is low and it makes you clench tightly around him. 

he drags out of you slowly before slamming back into you, your ass jiggling at the contact. your arms weaken almost instantly, laying down onto the table. wonwoo reaches around you and rips open your button-up shirt, the buttons popping off and scattering all over the floor. 

“wonwoo!” you cry out. “sorry, baby. i got impatient” he digs his fingers into your hips and sets a steady pace. his fingers are sure to leave marks on your skin. marks you’ll be admiring for days in the mirror. 

he presses your head into the desk. your mouth hangs open, drool pooling next to your face. your eyes roll into the back of your head repeatedly. 

“what can chromosomal mutations involve?” he says suddenly. “what?” you pant. “what can chromosomal mutations involve? give me the right answer and i’ll let you cum” he attaches the pad of his pointer finger to your clit, speeding up your oncoming orgasm. “oh my god uh” you pause to rack your brain for the answer. 

as your orgasm threatens to crash down on you, you blurt out the answer. “mutations can involve deletions, insertions, inversions, or translocations of sections or segments of dna” you cry out, your orgasm causing you to twitch on the table. “fuck fuck fuck, good girl” he pulls out of you, letting his orgasm spill onto your skirt. 

you pick your head up off the table and wipe the drool off the side of your face. “y’know, when you asked mr. kim to hook you up with a tutor, he didn’t mean for you to hook up with your tutor” he pulls your panties back up your legs and flips your skirt back down. 

“you got the last question wrong by the way” he nods towards your paper. “but by then, i couldn’t keep it in my pants” he kisses your drooly lips, smiling at you. “what the fuck, wonwoo.”

“sorry, baby cakes. do it again and maybe we’ll go for round two.” 

© lomlhwa 2023

[artsy-hobbitses]

Are there any facts or headcanons you can share about Megatron?

-Cracks knuckles- By which you mean old man Morgantron, boy do I.

LOVES dogs. Thaddeus/Terminus used to own a mining dog that would help pull carts, a Bernese Mountain named Boudicca which both he and a young Morgan would dote over. While Bouda passed away in his late teens, that childish adoration for dogs hasn't diminished, and has instead been transferred to Old Fella---an old pit bull rescued and initially intended for rehoming by Barricade/Barrin, who eventually couldn't find the heart to give him up. Megs often has Old Fella curled up at his feet while he's catching up on reading in his free time.

Has a surprising sweet tooth. Sugar was a luxury in Morgan's childhood and not something Thaddeus couldn't afford very often on miner pay, and what sweet food was common there were coal miner cakes… which are loved but an acquired taste. His guilty pleasures include Mars Bars which a young!Omar/OP would share with him through the fence that separated them as children, and more poignantly, Brooklyn-style Blackout Cake since it was tradition for Thaddeus to get him a slice of it for his birthday every year until they were shipped off to Messatine.

Within Morgan's personal office in a glass case is an old blood-spattered and battered copy of Umar ibn al-Khattâb: His Life and Times (Volume One). This is the very first book he read outside of what was greenlit/approved for the manual class and was lent to him decades ago by a young Omar, who threw it over the fence they would talk through, for him to catch. It had been confiscated from him during a spotcheck, but he found it years and years later in a HR contraband warehouse and he's kept it guarded ever since. What he doesn't know is that Omar still has the second volume of that book (there are two) kept in the same manner.

Secretly listens in on Omar's increasingly popular book club sessions (Part of an Autobot PR programme after they figured out that Omar had a voice fit for ASMR and people genuinely wanted to hear him read to them) on the radio during nights where he's feeling particularly lonely and melancholy.

Is an excellent fiddler. However, was not allowed to bring his instrument to Messatine and hasn't played since.

Morgan can cook, but is primarily relegated to British pub fare. Makes a mean steak and ale pie, one of his favorite foods. He also serves potential Decepticon recruits slices of coal miner cake he bakes during their first meet/interview (he does not tell them he baked it) to see how they react. If they act like they're too good for the humble bit of joy miners like him partook in, they're out.

Morgan does not have a great sense of direction, because when you're living 80% of your life underground, everything looks the same and you simply follow the neatly delineated cart tracks to your workplace or berth. Tracks above ground ie. roads are. Messy, and very confusing. He gets lost more easily than one might expect.

He has however, a sharper than usual sense of smell, which helped him out a lot as a miner when it came to seeking out fresh air and quickly identifying toxic or flammable gases emitted underground.

He is also in Grimlock/Graeme's team of Sometimes Cannibalism Is Correct. Those guards who beat to death a miner in front of him while he was on Mining Outpost C-12? He found two of them years and years later (he never forgot their voices over the miner's pleas) as a gladiator, killed the one who struck the first blow and ate their heart (they had no hearts to begin with, he surmises, so really, they're not missing anything) while the other watched. This was symbolic of his hatred for them, but also to loosen the remaining guard's lips about Decimus' movements after the incident up to this point, and for sure, it worked.

No longer gets drunk (he assumes his gladiatorial 'upgrades' are part of the reason for this), deeply wishes he still could sometimes.

Morgan forged his own armor pieces as a gladiator, and this is something that has carried on into the present, as he helps forge the armor the inner circle Deceptions wear, which is then programmed by Shockwave (the exception is Starscream/Stefan, who has been using a prototype armored flightsuit made by Senator Shockwave/Sharifuddin from day one). He uses this time as a one on one session to get to know them better.

Still visits the little public library in the Dead End that Omar set up in honor of him every now and then when he needs somewhere quiet to collect his thoughts and slog through paperwork.

Is the asshole who dog-ears books, but in his defense, he'd never seen a book in his community as a child that wasn't banged up to hell and back---what mattered were the contents. The SOLE exception here is the book that OP gave him and was confiscated from him. It's more than a book; it's a gift from his oldest friend.

"You didn't ask, I don't see why it's an issue" gay. Though one can't tell from first glance because Impactor will bring up the time that he booked a male and female stripper for Megs as a 20th birthday surprise/joke, and came back to find both of them engrossed listening to Megs reading his notes for Towards Peace and discussing it between the three of them. Basically, he's Enjolras (cause above all) for everything and everyone except Prime.

If you're an enemy he respects, he'll kill you himself and make it quick. If he hates you, he'll prolong it. If you don't register on his radar/aren't worth the effort, you get Tarn.

Suffers from a mild case of black lung carried over from his mining days, which only becomes more apparent in his 50s, as his healing factor slowly decreases.

[autobot2001]

Another Good Day

Author: Autobot2001 Henre: Fanfiction Fandom: Transformers Rating: E Warning: None pairing: Drift X Jamie (OC) Description: Cogman and Vivian has another idea of how Drift and Jamie can spend time together.

@fluffyfebruary: partners @fluffbruary: tea cakes | flood | feature

Crosshairs and Drift sit on the couch in the living room, listening to the crackling fire. It's one in the morning, and neither can sleep. Jamie's mental health and lack of interest worries them. "You should go to bed," Drift says, "if this insomnia is going to keep up and I use all my holoform's energy—." "Then you should also go to bed. We're partners in battle and — what?" Crosshairs asks, seeing Drift's smile. "Just thinking about how our relationship is." "I already said the only thing I'd change is Jamie's mental health and that damn chemical in her blood. I love both my battle partners. We are partner guardians to Jamie, but I think we're more like a family. I worry about you and Jamie," Drift rests his head on Crosshairs' shoulder and yawns, "come on, I'm not letting you sleep in here." The two stand up, the fire is out, and the two go upstairs.

With how late they went to bed, both mechs slept in until nine. "So much for a workout," Crosshairs complains. "Lazy aft," Drift teases, "go now. You'll be done by the time Jamie is awake." Crosshairs doesn't bother convincing Drift to join him. Drift lies next to Jamie, wondering what the plan for today could be. This changes to thinking about how much he loves Jamie. Drift isn't bothered that this has happened frequently in the past few weeks. He loves every physical feature about her. He's not sure if he should like Jamie's short stature as it's an effect of the chemical that was injected to kill her twenty-one years ago. Drift loves Jamie's personality, save for her mental health. To Drift, his relationship with his cross-dimensional traveler is like romantic relationships on Cybertron; not always perfect. The two in the relationship know to accept flaws happen unless it's accepting a toxic relationship. He's seen on Earth there's too much of an expectation for the relationship to be perfect. Drift didn't realize how long he'd thought about Jamie until he felt her move. "Good morning," Drift smiles. "Sleep." "Nope, it's ten in the morning. Time to get up." Drift holds onto Jamie and gets off the bed. He carries her out of the room.

Crosshairs is displeased seeing Drift walk into the kitchen. "You ruined it!" He complains. Drift sees that Crosshairs had planned to bring breakfast upstairs. How long of a workout did he do? Drift questions, seeing Crosshairs made pancakes. He sets Jamie on a bar stool at the island and sits next to her. Crosshairs made Jamie and himself coffee while he made Drift tea. It's quiet while the three eat.

The two mechs talk about the plan for the day while cleaning the kitchen. Other than deciding not to go out, they're still determining what the plan is for the day.

The day is the same as most days until the three walk into the kitchen at three. The femme watches Drift get the box of nut bars from the cabinet. She tells Drift Cogman made tea cakes. Crosshairs smiles, knowing what Cogman and Vivian planned. "Go be with your partner," he tells Drift. Crosshairs watches as Drift takes Jamie's hand and takes her to the living room. He smiles, seeing the two doing something together. He doesn't consider Vivian or himself creating opportunities for Drift and Jamie to do something together as unusual. Vivian follows with a tray prepared with a plate of tea cakes, a small stainless steel pitcher with hot water, a creamer full of milk, two cups with tea bags placed in them, and a small sugar bowl. Cogman walks into the kitchen, just missing Vivian leaving. Crosshairs tells him that Drift and Jamie went to the living room, and Vivian brought the tray.

Drift knows what Cogman and Vivian are trying to do. He doesn't mind their help. The coffee table is moved in front of the sectional. Drift finds a movie to watch as the two enjoy tea and tea cakes. Jamie leans on Drift when she's not drinking her tea. Sunstreaker found out where Drift and Jamie were and snuck a few pictures. He smiles as he takes them. Drift will love these. Sunstreaker thinks. He closes the door before either realize it's open and goes upstairs to print the pictures.

Drift and Jamie stay in the living room until dinner. By then, the movie is over. The others see how happy Drift and Jamie are. Regretting they didn't think of helping the two do things together sooner. Hoping to keep it up.

[shibbydog]

Cake, and robots! Cake, cake, and robots!

[witchofthesouls]

Cybertronians would lose their minds over mushrooms because what do you mind they just quickly sprout after the rain while other plants need way longer time to grow

The deeper they go into fungi, the more mental anguish it gives Cybertronians because even that mystery corner of biology confuses humans, too.

Bless their sparks because it's a mindbender because the Autobots are used to non-living fuel sources, so it's wild to them that there are different types and approaches to it. Like yeast. It's used in bread, and yet humans can get yeast infections? How??? Too many sandwiches and donuts?

(On a side note, due to when and where the Autobots had landed, everything with bread with filling and eaten by hand is a sandwich to them. Hamburgers and hotdogs. Dumplings, buns, and calzones are sealed sandwiches. Tacos and pizza are flatbread, open sandwiches. Pies and cakes are dessert sandwiches.

It's the bread bowl that causes fierce debate.)

[cozzzynook]

For the Angsty Starbee ask. I can only image the very confused look Megatron has when he sees the Seeker's return from their 'raid'

Thundercracker is mostly un-harmed save for a few dents while Skywarp is head to toe covered in cake, engex and has a few deep wounds but a pleased overjoyed look on his face.

Starscream hasn't returned yet and the only answer the other seekers have given him is that 'He's on his honeymoon', Strange Megatron didn't know his SIC had a conjunx.

This is hilarious.

Star finally comes back months later with a happy conjunx in his arms and the large pile of data work he’d completed and up to date info he asked, yes actually asked, Soundwave to send him. Gives it to Megatron, tells him this is his conjunx Bee who will be staying with him and his trine who is no longer an autobot but not a decepticon and just goes off to the seeker quarters to introduce him to the other fliers.

Megs is looking so disturbed and shocked because one, thats Optimus Primes son and two, Starscream came in wearing feminine jewels and silks with a conjunx that WAS OBVIOUSLY OPTIMUS PRIMES SON!!!

Soundwave has to catch Megatron when he faints lol