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seoulzie · 5 months ago

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sleepless encounters

───── CAPELLA ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 1 the brightest star in the northern constellation, auriga

synopsis: beomgyu, a high school insomniac, finds a hidden observatory tower - only to discover another sleepless soul, y/n, already there. trapped together, initial awkwardness gives way to connection as they share their struggles.

彡★ pairing: beomgyu x f!reader 彡★ genre: fluff, angst, strangers to lovers au, university au 彡★ warnings: sleep disorders, mental health issues, physical violence, emotional distress, mild language, family dynamics (i swear its not that serious i just tag a lot)

( this is part of a longer work ) ⤷ read whispers of the unsleeping here!

SEUL SPEAKS! first chapter!! woooo!! aur alps means "alpha auriga" which is another name for the star capella heh i wrote this in the span of two days & it is very much proofread but as always, if i missed anything, pls let me know~!

CHAPTER 1: AUR ALPS word count: 7.5K

the first light of dawn barely peeked through the curtains, rousing you from another restless night. insomnia had been a constant companion for as long as you could remember. frustration gnawed at you with each tick of the clock as minutes bled into an hour.

finally, defeated, you threw off the covers. no point in lying there anymore. you rolled out of bed, rubbed your eyes gritty with fatigue, and began your morning routine.

the routine of getting ready for school felt both familiar and exhausting. each step, from washing your face that felt heavy with sleep to pulling on your uniform, was a battle against fatigue clinging to you like a physical weight. as you slipped on your skirt, your fingers brushed against something unexpected – a crumpled wad of bills tucked into the pocket. a small smile played on your lips. "well, that's a welcome surprise," you thought, tucking the money into your wallet.

descending the stairs, you called out, "mom? are you still here?" but there was no response. you noticed a plate of food on the kitchen table, neatly covered with a note: "have a great day at school! love, mom."

you smiled. your mom always found a way to care for you, even with your busy schedule. you ate your breakfast quickly, savoring the homemade meal, before grabbing your bag and heading out the door.

as you stepped outside, you were greeted by the crisp morning air. a few houses down the street, mr. yu, your neighbor with a permanent scowl etched onto his face, was watering his prized petunias. his eyes inevitably landed on you, his lips pursing in disapproval.

"going to school so early, young lady? wouldn't have thought you were such a studious one," he remarked, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

you just smiled. "good morning, mr. yu. early bird gets the worm, right?" you countered, dodging his veiled criticism. dealing with mr. yu’s daily commentary was an art form you had mastered. a quick joke, a disarming smile, and the grumpy neighbor's negativity usually dissipated. today, however, mr. yu seemed particularly disgruntled.

mr. yu huffed but said nothing more as you walked past him, a playful grin on your face.

you hurried down the street, your pace quickening under mr. yu’s scrutiny. you reached the corner and took a deep breath, the fresh air filling your lungs. the walk to school was unusually quiet. the early hour meant most students were still nestled in their beds, blissfully unaware of your daily struggle to stay awake.

because you had woken up earlier than usual, you realized you had enough time to stop by your favorite café. this was a rare treat since you typically only visited after school. the café was a cozy little spot, with a warm and inviting atmosphere. when you entered, the familiar sound of the door chime welcomed you.

"y/n! an early bird, aren't you?" a friendly voice greeted you as you pushed open the door. it was minho, the barista with a perpetually tired smile.

"couldn't sleep," you confessed sheepishly. "usual?"

minho chuckled, already reaching for your favorite iced caramel latte. "have it right here."

"you know me too well," you grinned, adding, "make it a takeout, please."

minho winked. "coming right up," he said, expertly adding a swirl of whipped cream and a drizzle of caramel sauce.

the coffee was a secret weapon you deployed on these mornings. the cool sweetness was a welcome shock to your system, a temporary antidote to the fatigue clinging to you like cobwebs. while minho finished preparing your order, you whipped out your phone, pretending to be engrossed in a text message.

"here you go, sleepyhead," minho said, sliding the coffee across the counter. "on the house, consider it a pre-dawn pick-me-up."

your eyes widened in surprise. "you don't have to—"

"think of it as an investment in future caffeine sales," minho chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "besides, you always brighten this place up, even at this ungodly hour."

a genuine smile bloomed on your face. grabbing the coffee, you mumbled a thank you before slipping out into the quiet morning.

by the time you reached school, the hallways were still relatively empty. not many students had arrived yet. you wandered through the corridors, enjoying the calm before the storm of a typical school day. eventually, you made your way to your first class. the room was mostly empty except for a few students napping at their desks. you envied how easily they could fall asleep.

settling into your seat, you began organizing your supplies. a few minutes later, your friend jihye walked in, looking surprised to see you.

"morning! you're here early. what's the occasion?" jihye teased, and you just smiled. "just wanted to get a head start today."

jihye, oblivious to your secret, merely shrugged. you settled into your seats, exchanging hushed whispers as the first few students trickled into the classroom.

your conversation was cut short as the teacher walked in and started the lesson. you focused on your work, diligently taking notes and solving problems. despite your lack of sleep, you managed to stay alert.

lunchtime arrived, and the cafeteria buzzed with activity. you sat with jihye and a few other friends, enjoying their usual banter and laughter.

"hey, y/n!," jihye said between bites of her sandwich. "do you want to hang out during free period today? we could go to the library or something."

"actually," you started, your voice soft, "i think i might have to pass on that today. i promised ms. lee i'd help her out with something in the astronomy club during the free period."

jihye's brows furrowed in confusion. "astronomy club? but isn't that, like, completely dead? remember the fire last year?"

you flinched at the memory. the fire that ravaged the observatory tower at the edge of the schoolyard had indeed put a damper on the astronomy club's activities. most students, spooked by the incident, had abandoned the club altogether.

"technically, it still exists," you mumbled, avoiding jihye's gaze. "and technically, i'm still the president." a small, defiant part of you swelled with pride. just because everyone else gave up, didn't mean you had to.

jihye's eyes widened. "woah, you serious? you're the sole member of the astronomy club?"

you forced a small smile. "something like that." jihye, bless her heart, could be a tad nosy sometimes. but you couldn't tell her the real reason why you spent your free periods in the observatory. it wasn't about dusty telescopes or gazing at the stars. it was about the only place you could steal a few precious moments of sleep, hidden from the world.

"well," jihye said, her voice softening. "if you're sure about the astronomy club…"

"positive," you chimed in a little too brightly. "rain or shine, duty calls right?"

jihye chuckled, a hint of suspicion lingering in her eyes. "alright, alright. don't overdo it, you. rest is important, even for presidents of dead clubs."

your smile faltered slightly. rest. the very word felt like a cruel joke. "i'll keep that in mind," you managed, forcing a light tone.

the rest of the day passed in a blur of classes, notes, and forced smiles. every stolen glance at the clock felt like an eternity. finally, the sweet chime of the bell at the end of the day signaled freedom, or at least a temporary escape from watchful eyes.

with a mumbled goodbye to jihye, you dashed out of the classroom, your heart pounding in your chest. the observatory stood alone on the edge of the schoolyard, a stark silhouette against the setting sun. it looked forlorn, a forgotten relic of a bygone era. yet, to you, it was a sanctuary, a place where you could finally shed the mask of forced normalcy and surrender to the exhaustion that gnawed inside.

you quickened your pace, reaching the observatory and pushing open the heavy wooden door with a sigh of relief. the musty scent of old books and dust greeted you, a familiar and strangely comforting aroma. you slipped through the door and up a rickety staircase to the top floor with practiced ease.

there, under the expansive dome roof, lay your makeshift haven – a bed of thick comforters and pillows positioned right beneath the open skylight. it wasn't much, but for you, it was peace amidst the relentless war with sleep.

you settled onto your bed, pulling the comforter around you. the warmth and the gentle light filtering through the observatory’s domed roof created a cocoon of comfort. as you lay there, you felt your eyelids grow heavy, the exhaustion from countless sleepless nights finally catching up to her. you took a deep breath, letting the peaceful silence of the observatory lull you into a rare and much-needed sleep.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

today was the day. the day choi beomgyu finally gets some sleep. not the kind you get after cramming for exams or the fitful kind after practice – no, this was pure, uninterrupted shut-eye.

he bolted out of the classroom the second the bell for his free period chimed, ignoring soobin's shouts about lunch "yah, beomgyu! aren't you hungry?" yeah, hungry for sleep, maybe! he weaved through the halls, walking towards the astronomy tower.

of course, fate had other plans. right as he rounded a corner, he practically collided with the bane of his existence – student council president kim jinhyun. now, jinhyun loved to preach about school rules, yet here he was, sprinting down the hallway with a stack of papers clutched in his sweaty hand. hypocrite much?

"watch where you're going!" jinhyun's voice called out. you know you're not supposed to run in the halls," he scolded.

"i wasn't running, i was speed walking," beomgyu protested, keeping his voice carefully neutral. he knew better than to antagonize jinhyun further, especially when the student council president looked like he was about to combust. but he couldn't resist a small jab. "seems a bit hypocritical coming from someone who appears to be auditioning for the track team."

jinhyun's face flushed a deeper shade of red, the color creeping not just up his neck but even to the tips of his perfectly styled hair. "that's not the point," he sputtered, his voice hitching slightly. "there are rules, beomgyu, and they apply to everyone."

beomgyu raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. "of course, president kim. rules are sacred. though, perhaps there should be an amendment for extenuating circumstances? like, say, if someone was tremendously behind schedule due to, i don't know, maybe spilling their precious student council paperwork all over the floor?"

jinhyun's eyes darted down to the stack of papers clutched precariously in his hand. beomgyu couldn't miss the way his grip tightened, his knuckles turning white.

"that's none of your concern," jinhyun snapped, his voice strained. he took a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. "just move aside. i need to get to the faculty lounge… now.”

finally, after navigating the labyrinthine hallways and avoiding further-ins with authority figures, beomgyu arrived at the old astronomical observatory. the door creaked loudly as he pushed it open, and a shaft of dusty sunlight sliced through the gloom, revealing a spiral staircase that corkscrewed upwards, leading him towards the astronomy tower. he hesitated for a moment, peering inside, a mixture of curiosity and trepidation pulling at him.

the observatory was a large, circular room with a domed roof that let in streams of natural light. dust motes floated in the air, and old telescopes and equipment were scattered about. despite the layer of dust and the slightly musty smell, the place had a certain charm. beomgyu took a deep breath, feeling a sense of awe and appreciation for the space.

as he slowly stepped inside, his eyes scanned the room, taking in the scene. but then he noticed something in the corner—a figure laid out on a makeshift bed of thick comforters and pillows. his heart skipped a beat as the realization dawned on him.

why the fuck is there a girl here?

his mind raced as he tried to process the unexpected sight. he had come here to find a quiet place to sleep, not to stumble upon someone else's secret hideout. beomgyu stood there, frozen in place, unsure of what to do next.

would she wake up if he moved closer? should he just leave and find another spot? but where else could he go?

he tiptoed closer, the floorboards groaning under his weight. "hello?" he called out hesitantly. the figure didn't move. he cleared his throat, the sound echoing eerily in the dusty room. "is someone there?"

a disgruntled groan rumbled from the darkness, punctuated by a grumble that sounded suspiciously like, "leave me alone…" beomgyu couldn't help but stifle a grin.

this wasn't some horror movie, was it? maybe he should just bolt. but then, the figure shifted slightly, the sheet slipping down to reveal a mess of hair and a sliver of a cheek. hesitantly, beomgyu inched closer.

beomgyu debated turning around and leaving. maybe this whole tower idea was a bad one. but curiosity, that pesky little gremlin, wouldn't let him. he wasn't one to back down from a challenge, especially not a challenge shrouded in a sheet.

with a newfound resolve, he tapped the figure lightly on the shoulder. the groan this time was more pronounced, followed by a muffled curse.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

your eyes snapped open, heart hammering against your ribs. a figure loomed over you, shrouded in the dim light filtering through the dusty window.

you scrambled back, grabbing your bag that lay beside the makeshift bed. "uhm… hi?" your voice came out a squeak, barely audible. "what are you doing here?"

the person chuckled, a low, almost amused sound. "i could ask you the same thing"

panic surged through you as you scrambled to your feet, slinging your bag over your shoulder. "i was just… taking a nap. i didn't think anyone would come here," you said quickly, trying to think of an escape plan.

you darted toward the door, yanking on the handle, but it wouldn't budge. you pulled harder, desperation creeping into your movements. you turned to face the boy, your face pale. "did you shut the door?"

the figure stepped closer, the faint sunlight revealing a mop of dark hair. "relax," he said, his voice surprisingly calm. "i didn't lock you in."

you whirled around, fear giving way to a flicker of anger. "then why won't it open?" your eyes darted to the doorknob, a sick feeling settling in your stomach. the lock was busted, hanging crookedly from the frame. this door could only be opened from the outside.

"oh," he said, his voice laced with a hint of surprise. "didn't notice that."

your heart plummeted. trapped in a dusty abandoned tower with a stranger? today couldn't get any worse.

"who are you?" you demanded, voice trembling. "how did you get in here?

he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "look, i'm not some kind of creep, okay? my name's beomgyu. and i was just about to settle in for a nap when i saw you here."

slowly, hesitantly, you lowered the bag clutched protectively to your chest. this beomgyu didn't seem dangerous, more… confused.

"you… you were going to sleep here?" you asked, disbelief coloring your voice.

beomgyu shrugged. "trying to find a place to nap. i've got insomnia, and it's been a real bitch lately. thought this place would be perfect, but looks like someone beat me to it."

you couldn't help but scoff. "clearly."

beomgyu's brow furrowed in frustration. "don't you have your phone?" he asked, his voice laced with a growing edge of impatience. "just call someone for help."

the simple suggestion felt like a punch to the gut. you clutched your bag tighter, an instinctive protectiveness rising within you. you didn't want anyone to see what was inside, especially not the stranger trapped here with you.

"i… i do," you mumbled, your voice barely a whisper. the lie tasted bitter on your tongue, but the idea of handing over your phone, your only lifeline to some semblance of normalcy, was unbearable.

beomgyu's frustration boiled over. "then call whoever you need to get us out of here!" he demanded, his voice sharp.

you flinched at the harsh tone, the urge to lash back rising. but you knew it wasn't his fault. he simply wanted to get out, and your hesitation was making everything more difficult.

taking a deep breath, you forced yourself to explain, surprised by the words tumbling out of your mouth. "it's not that simple," you blurted, the quiet desperation finally bubbling to the surface.

beomgyu blinked, taken aback by your outburst. he stared at you for a long moment, waiting for you to continue.

swallowing the lump in your throat, you spoke again, your voice trembling slightly. "i can't sleep at night," you confessed, the words heavy with a secret you'd held close for so long. "it drives me crazy! i get headaches all day and feel so exhausted, but i can't seem to fall asleep. so, i come here to rest."

a flicker of surprise crossed beomgyu's face, quickly followed by something that looked suspiciously like understanding. the realization seemed to dawn on him slowly, a connection forming between you despite the strange circumstances.

suddenly, a strange sense of vulnerability washed over you. you hadn't meant to reveal your secret, but the words had escaped before you could stop them. here you were, trapped in a dusty room with a stranger, yet you'd opened up a part of yourself you'd kept hidden for so long.

"look," beomgyu said, his voice softer now, the harshness gone. "i get it. i have a friend named soobin. he's one of the few people who knows i have insomnia too. we can call him. he'd be able to help us."

he held out your phone towards you, his eyes searching yours for a flicker of consent. relief washed over you, a wave that calmed the storm of emotions churning within.

maybe, just maybe, this wouldn't be so bad after all.

with a silent nod, you allowed beomgyu to take your phone. as he dialed a number and started explaining your predicament to soobin, you couldn't help but steal a glance at him.

the afternoon sun slanted through the dusty window, painting golden stripes across the floor. beomgyu's voice, low and calming as he spoke with his friend, was a soothing counterpoint to the frantic drumming of your heart. realizing how tense you'd been, you sank back onto the thing you call a bed, the worn blankets offering a surprising sense of comfort.

he finished the call with a sigh of relief. "soobin has class but he'll come get us soon. he should be here in about twenty minutes."

he shuffled closer, settling down beside me on the dusty floor. the proximity sent a jolt through you, but it wasn't the same fear as before. now, it was laced with a strange curiosity.

"you know, i've always been under the impression that you were just a popular stoner, beomgyu," you confessed after he hung up, a wry smile playing on your lips.

he chuckled, running a hand through his hair. "well," he said, a sheepish grin spreading across his face. "i am always sleepy and irritable, so i guess that tracks."

"but man," beomgyu sighed, leaning back against the dusty wall, "is this the perfect place to sleep, or what?"

you glanced around the room, taking in the chipped paint, the cobwebs clinging to the corners, and the single, flickering lightbulb hanging precariously from the ceiling. "perfect might be a strong word," you admitted with a smile.

"okay, okay," he conceded, raising his hands in mock surrender. "maybe 'peaceful' is a better description."

there was a moment of silence as you both processed this unexpected connection. you studied beomgyu, noticing the dark circles under his eyes and the tension in his shoulders. you knew all too well the toll insomnia could take.

beomgyu glanced at you, looking thoughtful. "so, how long have you been using this place?"

"a few months," you admitted, your voice barely a whisper. "ever since the fire."

beomgyu's brow furrowed. "the fire?"

you nodded, a flicker of sadness crossing your features. "yeah, the one that ripped through the old science wing last year. remember? they condemned this whole tower as a safety hazard."

a wave of realization washed over beomgyu. the faint smell of smoke that lingered in the air, the boarded-up windows on the lower floors – it all clicked into place.

"so, this has been your secret ever since?" he asked a hint of awe in his voice.

you gave a small smile. "yeah. helps me get through the day without falling apart."

beomgyu nodded, understanding clear in his eyes. "guess we have more in common than i thought."

you fell into an easy conversation, talking about the things that kept you awake at night – the pressure of school, the nagging feeling of never doing enough, the weight of unsaid words hanging heavy in the air. as you were speaking, a heavy silence fell upon the room.

glancing over at beomgyu, you found him slumped against the wall, eyes closed. his normally messy hair seemed even more tousled, and a faint line creased his brow. a small, surprised laugh escaped your lips. here he was, the infamous beomgyu, the guy who seemed to effortlessly glide through life, sound asleep beside you.

a pang of sympathy stabbed at you. maybe his effortless facade wasn't so effortless after all.

shifting carefully, you made yourself a little more comfortable on the makeshift bed. your movements were limited, but you managed to prop yourself up with a pillow. stealing another glance at beomgyu, you noticed the slight rise and fall of his chest, a testament to his deep sleep.

hesitantly, you reached out a hand, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. the gesture felt oddly intimate, yet strangely comforting.

suddenly, beomgyu's head bobbed forward, landing with a soft thud on your shoulder. your breath hitched. in all the years you'd dreamt of sharing this place, a moment of vulnerability, you hadn't imagined it playing out like this.

a blush crept up your cheeks, but before you could react, a tired sigh escaped beomgyu's lips. your options were limited. you could wake him, but he looked so peaceful, so utterly exhausted.

with a resigned sigh, you carefully adjusted yourself, trying to find a comfortable position with his head on your shoulder. the dust motes danced in the afternoon sunbeams, casting playful shadows around the room. despite the unconventional situation, a sense of drowsiness washed over you.

perhaps, just for a little while, getting some sleep wasn't such a bad idea.

soon, your own head was lying atop beomgyu's, and for the first time in a long while, you felt the edges of sleep pulling you in

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

the rusty lock creaked open, jolting you and beomgyu awake. a wave of relief washed over you as soobin, his face etched with amusement, stepped inside.

"looks like i got here just in time," soobin said, his grin widening.

a blush crept up your neck, mirroring the one blooming on beomgyu’s face. relief and a touch of sheepishness washed over you both as you scrambled to your feet, disentangling yourselves in a flurry of fumbled apologies.

stepping out of the dusty observatory and back into the sunlight, your eyes landed on a glint of silver of a pen peeking out from soobin's id holder. a playful idea sparked in your mind.

"hey soobin," you said, "can i borrow that pen for a second?"

without a second thought, soobin unclipped the pen and handed it over. you quickly scribbled something on your palm.

"high five?" you asked beomgyu, extending your hand.

beomgyu, still dazed from his unexpected nap, met your hand with a puzzled slap. the wet ink transferred, and as his eyes landed on his palm, his eyes widened curiously, your number, neatly written, stared back at him.

"only for you!" you called out, a rush of excitement propelling you down the stairs.

soobin watched you go, then glanced at his now empty hand. "she didn't give me back my pen," he remarked, shaking his head with a smile.

beomgyu chuckled, a warm feeling blossoming in his chest. he stared at the number on his hand, the day's events replaying in his mind. maybe the nap hadn't been so bad after all.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

a few days later

beomgyu sat in the nurse’s office, his gaze fixed on the floor. a fresh bandage felt stiff and itchy against his cheek, a reminder of the throbbing ache beneath. he barely acknowledged the nurse as she tended to his wound, too tired and frustrated to engage in conversation.

"looks like someone walked face-first into a door," the nurse remarked, her voice laced with a knowing amusement that made beomgyu clench his jaw. he mumbled a noncommittal reply, his eyes darting to the chipped paint on the wall opposite him, anywhere but the concern etched on the nurse's face.

"you must have some bad luck to end up at the clinic right before the school festival, huh?" the nurse remarked, her tone light and conversational.

"yeah, i guess so," beomgyu replied dully, still not looking up.

the nurse, ms. yura, noticed the tired bags under his eyes as she swirled her coffee in her cup. "you know, they say 1 out of 3 people in korea struggle with some kind of sleeping disorder," she commented, her voice taking on a more serious tone. "they know sleep is important and feel pressured to get some, which leads to stress building up. it's a vicious cycle."

beomgyu finally looked up, his expression guarded. "i never said i had trouble sleeping and isn't stress just... i don't know... part of life?"

ms. yura sipped her coffee, considering his words. "there's a 6-second period where your anger peaks when triggered by stress. if you can shut it down in that moment, your anger will subside. you know, sometimes taking a deep breath and counting to ten can really help." her voice held a knowing quality that made beomgyu squirm in his seat

just then, the clinic door swung open, and you strode in, groaning dramatically. "ms. yura~, i got hit by a ball," you whined, rubbing your arm with an exaggerated pout. you stopped short when you saw beomgyu sitting there, and they stared at each other in surprise.

the nurse chuckled awkwardly, glancing between you. "so, you two know each other, huh?"

you quickly looked away, feeling a flush of embarrassment. beomgyu, on the other hand, just sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and oddity about this unexpected encounter.

after ms. yura tended to your minor injury, the two of you left the clinic together, an unusual silence hanging between you.

you walked ahead, happily skipping along. beomgyu trailed behind, his shoulders slumped and a faint grimace playing on his lips, a stark contrast to your sunny mood. you turned back to face him, walking backward with a bright smile. "soo... what happened to your face?" you asked, concern flickering in your eyes.

beomgyu mumbled something inaudible, his gaze fixed firmly on the ground. you tilted your head, urging him to explain further.

"ugh, fine," he sighed, resignation flickering across his features. "some jerk accidentally hit me with a ball," beomgyu replied, his tone flat.

your eyes widened in surprise. "so you hit him back?" the question tumbled out before you could filter it, curiosity bubbling over.

beomgyu shrugged, his expression hardening. "he refused to apologize then i hit him," he muttered, scuffing his shoe against the ground.

you let out a small laugh, shaking your head. "uh, okay then." you decided to switch the topic. "i haven't seen you since that one time. did you get over your sleeplessness?"

beomgyu let out a tired sigh. "no. i was in the middle of a yawn when the ball hit me."

you nodded in understanding. "same here. i haven't slept well in a week. you wanna come to the observatory today?"

beomgyu hesitated, his mind racing. the observatory was a great spot to sleep, but he wasn't sure how to handle... well, you. you were so open and cheerful, the complete opposite of his introverted nature. on top of that, there was the added complication of your smile. it had a way of disarming him, making him feel things he wasn't quite ready to unpack. "well... i'm not sure," he admitted.

you stopped in your tracks, turning to face him with a serious expression. "i need you, beomgyu. because i can't sleep."

the silence stretched, thick with unspoken urgency and beomgyu felt a strange mix of emotions. it was a feeling he wasn't used to. that strange fluttering in his chest? probably just the adrenaline of a near heart attack.

"alright," he said finally, nodding. "i'll come."

your face lit up with a grateful smile, and you continued skipping ahead, humming a cheerful tune. beomgyu followed behind, what did he get himself into?

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

beomgyu made his way to the observatory, his heart pounding with a mix of anticipation and exhaustion. as he climbed the twirly staircase, he was greeted by your head peeping at the top of the staircase.

"oh! you're here!" you called out, a bright smile lighting up your face.

beomgyu nodded, trying to muster a smile in return. "yeah, i'm here."

you made your way to one of the old cabinets in the corner of the room, patting its side with a determined look. "alright! down to business!"

beomgyu got the memo and dropped his bag on the floor, rolling up his sleeves. he walked over to the cabinet, glancing at you. "you want me to help move this?"

"yup," you said cheerfully. "we need to get it down the stairs and out of the way."

beomgyu sighed inwardly. 'damnit, she only asked me to come to help with the labor,' he thought, but he didn't voice his complaint. 'come on, beomgyu,' he scolded himself. 'heavy furniture, not heavy flirting.'

instead, he straightened his back and focused on the practicalities. ducking under the bulky cabinet, he grabbed a side, silently vowing to channel his nervous energy into pure muscle power. across from him, you mirrored his stance.

you grunted with effort, inching the heavy cabinet down the first step. "be careful of the stairs, okay?" you reminded beomgyu, whose back was straining under the weight on his end.

"yeah, yeah," he muttered, eyes narrowed in concentration as he walked backward down the steps. the old wood creaked ominously beneath their combined weight.

you struggled with the weight of the cabinet, both of you straining against the heavy wood. beomgyu felt his arms beginning to shake, the strain quickly becoming too much.

"wait, wait!!" he suddenly yelled, panic rising in his voice. "too heavy, put it down! down!"

"no! it's okay! we can make it!" you responded, your voice strained but determined.

"no, no!" beomgyu insisted, his voice breaking with urgency. "i seriously can't!"

despite your best efforts, the weight of the cabinet became unbearable. you both let go at the same time, the cabinet crashing down the stairs with a thunderous bang, echoing through the empty observatory. both of you stumbled back, breathing heavily and looking at each other with wide eyes.

"well," you said, trying to catch your breath. "that didn't go as planned."

beomgyu shook his head, letting out a half-hearted laugh. "yeah, no kidding."

you stood there for a moment, both of you panting and staring at the now slightly damaged cabinet lying at the bottom of the stairs.

"i don't know why you wanted to clean up so much, all you're gonna do here is sleep," beomgyu remarked, trying to lighten the mood.

"but we have to make enough space for the both of us, no?" you replied with a teasing smile. "plus, if you manage to get some rest here from time to time, then you might spend less time being a grouch."

beomgyu let out a chuckle. "i guess so."

your expression softened as you looked at him. "say, beomgyu, how did you spend your long and boring nights?"

"i used to kill time by looking at stuff on my phone, but i quit after reading that led displays can mess with your sleep," beomgyu said, pausing for a moment. "so i started doing stuff like reading books and listening to the radio... but even when i got to bed, my mind would just wander for hours until morning eventually came."

suddenly, you perked up. "getting depressed about lack of sleep and worrying about a bunch of problems we can't solve..."

you pushed yourself to your feet, the gentle creak of the floorboards chipping. walking towards a seemingly innocuous lever near the observatory deck, you gestured for beomgyu to follow. "let’s make things fun" your voice tinged with enthusiasm. "whether we have a good time or a bad one, the morning sun's still gonna be the same,"

turning your back on him, you reached for the lever. with a satisfying whirring sound, the entire roof dome of the observatory groaned into motion, slowly peeling back to reveal a breathtaking vista. the sky, once tinged with the remnants of sunset, was now a breathtaking tapestry woven with a million stars. the vast expanse, sprinkled with celestial diamonds, stretched out before you, an invitation to lose yourself in its infinite depths.

you turned your back, looking up at the sky of twinkling hues. "let's revive the astronomy club."

beomgyu stared at you, the beauty of the sunset mirrored in his eyes. the sense of purpose and camaraderie he felt in that moment was something he hadn't experienced in a long time. he nodded slowly, a smile forming on his lips. "yeah, let's do it."

you beamed at him, your liveliness infectious. "great! we'll start by cleaning up this place and making it a proper clubroom again."

beomgyu sighed, glancing back at the cabinet. "but let's take a break before we move that thing again."

you laughed. "agreed. come on, let's take a seat and enjoy the view for a bit."

you sat down side by side, looking up at the sky through the open dome. the sense of peace and companionship you shared in that moment was a welcome respite from your usual sleepless nights.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

the city of yeosu had transformed into a canvas bathed in the cool hues of twilight. the once vibrant streets, normally teeming with daytime energy, had surrendered to a quiet languor. the only sounds that dared to pierce the stillness were the soft hum of distant traffic lights and the occasional rustle of a breeze whispering secrets through the trees. streetlights cast long, dramatic shadows, their gentle glow illuminating a city settling into a peaceful slumber. even the usual neon signs, usually vying for attention, seemed to have dimmed their vibrancy, creating a scene painted in shades of twilight blues and inky blacks.

high-rise buildings, once bastions of bustling activity, now stood as silent sentinels, their windows like scattered stars, each holding a story of its own. some windows remained dark, reflecting the serenity of the night, while others, adorned with a warm glow, hinted at pockets of life within. these illuminated windows paint a picture of solitude, each one a portal into a private world where dreams danced, or perhaps anxieties kept sleepless company.

you and beomgyu had agreed to meet on the bridge after the city curfew, but both of you were still wide awake and had nothing better to do. the bridge, a favorite local spot, offered a picturesque view of the canal flowing underneath and the moonlight reflecting off the water’s surface. as beomgyu approached the meeting point, he saw you already there, skipping along the bridge's edge, your movements carefree and light.

a nervous chuckle escaped beomgyu's lips. "i can't believe we're actually doing this," he confessed, his voice a low rumble that barely carried over the gentle lapping of water against the bridge's pilings. a mix of excitement and apprehension warred within him, a knot of butterflies churning in his stomach.

"ohh?" you teased, turning to face him with a playful grin. "i had a nervous fit when i snuck out of my house, but i've always wanted to do this! just walking around town at night." you gestured towards the city sprawled out before you "just imagine," you continued, your voice hushed with a thrill, "the entire city practically to ourselves!"

as you admire the buildings, their outlines softened by the dim glow of the streetlights. "so! where do you wanna go? should we just follow the canal down the river?"

beomgyu shook his head, a ghost of a smile tugging at his lips despite his nerves. "no, it's safer to walk through the districts since it would give us more places to hide if someone spots us."

"good point," y/n agreed, and they started walking through the quiet districts of yeosu.

the night unfolded like a storybook, each page filled with unexpected delights. you were a whirlwind, your contagious energy propelling you forward with an almost reckless abandon. you’d dart ahead, your laughter echoing through the quiet streets, only to abruptly halt, your figure framed by a splash of moonlight, as you realized you’d outpaced your companion.

beomgyu would smile, shaking his head fondly as he caught up. the rhythmic tap of his shoes on the pavement provided a steady counterpoint to the city's hushed symphony. you navigated the labyrinth of alleyways and backstreets, your footsteps echoing softly, each reverberation of the sleeping city.

along your journey, you stumbled upon hidden gems: a quaint bookstore with its windows a mosaic of forgotten stories, a tiny park where a lone bench offered a serene respite from the urban hustle, and a charming café that seemed to defy the night's slumber with its inviting glow. it was in front of one such café that you found yourselves captivated. through the large glass windows, a tantalizing display of pastries beckoned, a masterpiece of sugary artistry. each treat was a miniature work of edible art, its perfect form and vibrant colors a testament to the baker's skill. your mouths watered as they imagined the taste of those flaky croissants and creamy éclairs.

at a vending machine, you decided to treat beomgyu to some drinks, a small gesture of thanks for his company on this impromptu adventure.

with coins slotted in, you selected two cans, the machine's gears whirring to life. a tense silence filled the air as you waited for the coveted drop. then, with a jarring clang, two aluminum cans tumbled down the chute, their impact echoing through the narrow space.

you both jumped, your hearts pounding in your chests. a wave of embarrassment washed over you, your eyes darting around to ensure no one had witnessed your clumsy moment. thankfully, the alley remained deserted, the only sound of your rapid breathing.

as you continued walking, you noticed beomgyu's bag. it hung awkwardly from his shoulder, its contents seemingly heavy. “hey, what’s in the bag? it looks full,” you asked, curiosity piqued.

"oh, my bag?" beomgyu replied. "it's just a camera with a tripod."

"a camera? why?" you asked, curious.

a sheepish grin spread across beomgyu’s face. “well, you know, just in case we get caught,” he said, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “we can say we’re part of the photography club or something. maybe they’ll let us off with a warning." beomgyu explained, taking the camera out of the bag.

"but wouldn't taking pictures at night makes us seem like some kind of creepers?" y/n teased, making beomgyu freeze up.

he hadn't thought of it that way. "oh, i didn't consider that..."

“so, is photography your hobby or something?” y/n asked, her curiosity reignited.

"no, it's just a present my dad randomly gave me for christmas," beomgyu said, a hint of nostalgia in his voice. "back when i was in 5th grade, i really wanted this one game console, so i cried and made a big deal out of it when he gave me this instead."

y/n giggled again, making beomgyu crack a smile. "what's so funny?" he asked.

"nothing, just... you crying over gifts is hilarious," y/n replied.

beomgyu grinned. “hey, i was just a kid,” he defended himself playfully. “what about you? what were you like?”

a thoughtful expression crossed your face. “i was pretty frail as a kid,” you began, your voice soft. “spent a lot of time in the hospital. had to learn how to build up my stamina.” your tone was light, but the words carried a weight that surprised beomgyu.

"hospitalized?" beomgyu said, concern in his voice.

"mhm," y/n replied

just then, beomgyu stopped in his tracks, making y/n look back. a distant metallic click echoed in the night, followed by the rhythmic cadence of rubber against the pavement. heart pounding, beomgyu turned to see the source of the noise: a lone police officer, his bicycle casting a long, ominous shadow as he pedaled toward them.

quickly, beomgyu and y/n found shelter at a bus stop, ducking to avoid being spotted. the officer, as if sensing their presence, slowed his pace. the beam of his flashlight swept the area, its light growing brighter with each passing second. y/n's breath caught in her throat as the light drew closer, inching dangerously close to their hiding spot. beomgyu's grip on her hand tightened, his body shielding her as much as possible.

then, as suddenly as it had begun, the ordeal ended. the flashlight passed over their heads, its beam disappearing into the darkness. a sigh of relief escaped beomgyu's lips, his body relaxing slightly. y/n's grip on his shirt loosened, but she remained frozen in place, her mind racing.

"he's gone," beomgyu whispered, his voice hoarse with relief. his eyes, wide with fear just moments ago, now held a flicker of resolve. "we have to move."

back on their way to the riverside, y/n picked up their previous conversation. "back to our conversation, i'm totally okay now!" she said with a grin. "i did gymnastics which made me super flexible, but since i was so frail as a kid, i was averse to being a burden. that's why i really don't want anyone to know about my lack of sleep."

beomgyu stared at her, admiration in his eyes as she looked over the river. when she lifted her gaze from the water to the stars, beomgyu followed her gaze.

"you know, maybe being sleepless isn't so bad if you get to see beautiful scenes like this," y/n said softly.

beomgyu nodded, wishing he could capture the moment forever. then he realized he could. he pulled out his camera from its bag. first, he focused his lens on the celestial canvas above. the camera captured the myriad of stars, each one a tiny diamond scattered across the velvet expanse.

next, he turned his attention to the moon, its ethereal glow casting an enchanting spell over the world below. then, the river, a shimmering silver serpent winding its way through the night, became the subject of his lens.

as he took photos, his lens suddenly caught you in the frame. your silhouette is outlined by the soft moonlight. without thinking, he pressed the shutter, capturing you in a moment of grace. it was a candid shot, but when the camera clicked, you noticed and struck a pose, making beomgyu chuckle as he continued taking photos of you.

the night slowly gave way to dawn, and the first light of sunrise painted the sky in hues of gold and pink. you now sat on the edge of the bridge, your feet dangling over the side.

"morning is here," you chirped.

"that figures. now i'm sleepy," beomgyu replied, yawning. you both yawned in unison, then shared a giggle.

up until recently, you hadn't talked to each other at all. but now, here you were exploring the town at night together. when you were around, all the boring and sleepless nights became exciting and beomgyu couldn't help but wonder what kind of relationship this was becoming.

as the sun's shine glared on them, you skipped ahead and called out, "this is my house! thanks for walking me home."

beomgyu nodded, a reluctant smile tugging at his lips. instead of the usual goodbye, he offered a playful grin. "see you today," he said, his voice filled with a newfound lightness. you returned his smile, your eyes sparkling with a mix of amusement and something deeper.

you both laughed, knowing you had class in just a few hours. despite the lack of sleep, the night had brought them closer, and for the first time in a long time, they felt a sense of companionship that made their sleepless nights a little less lonely.

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hi-avathisside · 4 months ago

Text

Trigger Warning: Mental health, indications of suıcıde

Sept aa gaya aur pata bhi nahi chala, aaj teachers day hai aur pichla teacher's day mujhe bakhoobi yaad hai. yaar yeh samay bhi na kitni ajeeb cheez hai jitni upma se upma karu kam hai, kahu ki yeh samay inn ghirte- hatte baadlon ki tarah hai aur inn patton ke girne ki tarah hai aur iss toofan ke jaane ki tarah hai. yeh samay woh pighalti ice-cream ki tarah hai, woh signal badalne ki tarah hai, achaanak aane waali modoslaadhar baarish ki tarah hai aur aasmaan mai. ek indradhanush ki tarah hai toh bhi shayad kam hoga. Yeh saal kaise beeta pata hi nahinchala, yoon bhadrapad aa gaya aur keval kuch mahine hi bache hain yeh saal khatam hone main. yeh samay bhi na bohot kamaal hai. Pichle septmeber mujhe laga tha, ki shayad nahi ho paayega. Yeh zindagi, mujhse nahi ho paayegi, kyonki yaar mushkil hota hai, har din hospital jaana aur phir kaam, kaam aur hospital, lekin humne kiya. September guzra, ek ek din gine the humne ungliyon par zaroor, lekin kab december aa gaya pata hi nahi chala. Naye saal ki kuch zyada khushi nahi thi, bas yahi dua thi ki yeh sal khishiyaan laaye. January, fervary ek aisi hawa ka jhonka laaye jisse hum aaj tak waakif hi nahi the. Aur yeh hawa ka jhonka jis dhara se aaya tha humari zulfe udane ke liye, waise hi chala gaya, shayad kuch bikhri zulfe chhod gaya. Yeh saal guzar toh raha tha, lekin aisa lag raha tha ki hum sthir haim kuch badal nahi raha tha. Jitni bhi koshish kar lo yeh patthar hil hi nahi raha, yeh dhakkan khul hi nahi raha. Phir kya, socha aise rote hue raatein guzaarna thik nahi hai, yoon ghar main band rehna thik nahi hai, kuch toh galat hai. Madad li, shayad kuch behtar hua, shayad nahi. lekin inn sab ke beech, maine bohot yaadein banayi. Woh ek baarish, woh ek sunset, aur na jaane kitne saari hassi joh shayad nahi hoti agar maine zindagi ka haath chhod diya hota. Kuch din aise bhi the jinmein mujhe laga ki isse khush toh main nahi jo sakti, kuch raatein iss kadar thi ki mujhe laga ki mujhse dukhi koi nahi ho sakta. Ho sakta ho ki aapka samay itna achha na chal raha ho, lekin phir bhi, samay kaisa bhi ho, yeh chhoti chhoti khudhiyaan zaroor laata hain. September aa gaya aaj aur pata bhi nahi chala. Shayad, woh dhakkan thoda dheela ho gaya.

सितंबर आ गया और पता भी नहीं चला, आज टीचर्स दे है और इससे पिछला शिक्षक दिवस मुझे याद है। यार ये समय भी ना कितनी अजीब चीज़ है, जितनी उपमा से उपमा कम है, कहू की ये समय इन घिरते-हटते बादलों की तरह है और इन पत्तों के गिरने की तरह है और इ�� तूफ़ान के जाने की तरह है। ये समय वो ��िगलती आइसक्रीम की तरह है, वो सिग्नल बदलने की तरह है, अचानक आने वाली मूसलाधार बारिश की तरह है और आसमान में एक इंद्रधनुष की तरह है तो शायद काम होगा। ये साल कैसे बीता पता ही नहीं, यूं भाद्रपद आ गया और केवल कुछ महीने ही बचे हैं ये साल खत्म होने में। ये समय भी ना बहुत कमाल है। पिछले सितंबर मुझे लगा था, शायद नहीं हो पाएगा। ये जिंदगी, मुझसे नहीं हो पाएगी, क्योंकि यार मुश्किल होता है, हर दिन हॉस्पिटल जाना और फिर काम, काम और हॉस्पिटल, लेकिन हमने किया। सितंबर गुजरा, एक एक दिन गिनें थे हमने उंगलियों पर जरूर, लेकिन दिसंबर कब आ गया पता ही नहीं चला। नए साल की कुछ ज्यादा खुशी नहीं थी, बस यहीं दुआ थी कि ये साल खुशियां लाए। जनवरी, फरवरी एक ऐसी हवा का झोंका लाए जिसे हम आज तक वाकिफ ही नहीं थे। और ये हवा का झोंका जिस धारा से आया था हमारी जुल्फे उड़ान के लिए, वैसे ही चला गया, शायद कुछ बिखरी जुल्फे छोड़ गया। ये साल गुजर तो रहा था, लेकिन ऐसा लग रहा था कि हम स्थिर हैं, कुछ बदल नहीं रहा था। जितनी भी कोशिश कर लो ये पत्थर हिल ही नहीं रहा, ये धक्कन खुल ही नहीं रहा। फिर क्या, सोचा ऐसे रोते हुए रातें गुज़ारना ठीक नहीं है, यूं घर में बंद रहना ठीक नहीं है, कुछ तो गलत है। मदद ली, शायद कुछ बेहतर हुआ, शायद नहीं। लेकिन इन सब के बीच, मैंने बहुत यादें बनाईं। वो एक बारिश, वो एक सनसैट, और ना जाने कितनी सारी हंसी जो शायद नहीं होती अगर मैंने जिंदगी का हाथ छोड़ दिया होता। कुछ दिन ऐसे भी थे जिनमें मुझे लगा कि मुझसे ज्यादा खुश कोई नहीं है, कुछ रातें इस कदर थी कि मुझे लगा कि मुझसे दुखी कोई नहीं हो सकता। हो सकता है कि आपका समय इतना अच्छा न चल रहा हो, लेकिन फिर भी, समय कैसा भी हो, ये छोटी-छोटी खुशियां जरूर लाता है। सितंबर आ गया आज और पता भी नहीं चला। शायद, वो धक्कन थोड़ा ढीला हो गया।

wrote this at 8:30 am, first thought in the morning. It's because I never thought I could make it to September. I'm glad. Life throws shit at you, but please remember to breathe, and it'll pass on. Sept-Dec patch was very rough for me, but it passed and I'm glad it did. This is your reminder that it'll pass.

#desi #desi teen #pyaar #poetry #love #shayari #desi love #desi aesthetic #being desi #desi tumblr #desiblr #spilled poetry #spilled feelings #spilled thoughts #spilled words #heartbreak era #ava writes #written by ava

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