#choi beomgyu fluff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

gyorouis · 2 months ago

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𐙚 BIGGEST PLOT TWIST - CBG.

— it takes you a moment to register who you're looking at, but when you do, your heart skips a beat, it was choi beomgyu.

genre: angst, romance, slow burn (?), fake dating, crack

pairing: playboy!beomgyu x afab!reader

warning: mild language, emotional tension, mentions of avoidance and regret (if i missed anything, pls lmk!)

wordcount: 14.4k (now what...)

now playing: silent sanctuary — kundiman ୨ৎ

“who?” you ask your friend as you hurry to the next class, adjusting the strap of your bag that’s slipping off your shoulder. “who were you talking about again?” you repeat, a bit more impatiently this time, your mind still half-focused on the upcoming quiz.

“beomgyu,” your friend replies nonchalantly, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “i think he’s interested in you.”

you stop dead in your tracks, nearly causing a traffic jam in the hallway as students swerve around you. “choi beomgyu?” you ask, voice tinged with disbelief. “that choi beomgyu?”

your friend just nods, her expression suggesting she’s surprised you hadn’t noticed sooner.

“no way,” you mutter, shaking your head as you start walking again, though your pace is slower now, thoughts racing. “why would he—”

before you can finish the thought, you crash into something solid. something very solid. you stumble back, muttering a quick apology as you bow your head, but the words catch in your throat when you hear a low, almost lazy voice.

“meet me at the field later.”

you look up, startled, and find yourself staring into a pair of dark brown eyes, the kind that seem to see right through you. it takes you a moment to register who you’re looking at, but when you do, your heart skips a beat. choi beomgyu. the choi beomgyu.

he’s taller than you expected, his messy hair falling over his forehead in a way that’s almost annoyingly perfect. headphones hang around his neck, the kind that scream ‘i’m too cool to care about anything.’ you’re too busy taking in the details of his face—sharp jawline, slightly upturned lips, a faint scar on his eyebrow—to realize he’s still waiting for a response.

“so?” he prompts, raising an eyebrow.

“so?” you echo, still trying to wrap your mind around the fact that choi beomgyu is standing in front of you, talking to you.

“meet me at the field later,” he repeats, his voice dropping to a lower, more serious tone that sends a shiver down your spine.

“why would i?” you manage to say, though your voice doesn’t come out as confident as you’d hoped.

he just shrugs, like it doesn’t really matter to him whether you show up or not. then, without another word, he starts walking past you, his presence as overwhelming as the scent of his cologne lingering in the air.

“beomgyu!” you shout after him, more out of frustration than anything else. in a fit of impulse, you grab the nearest thing—your book—and throw it at him. it hits him square in the back, but he doesn’t even flinch. he just glances over his shoulder, smirks, and keeps walking like nothing happened.

“no way… you’re his target for this month?” your friend whispers, eyes wide as she watches the scene unfold.

“what the fuck is wrong with that guy?” you grumble, stomping over to pick up your book, your cheeks burning with a mix of embarrassment and anger. you clutch the book to your chest and head to your room, already dreading whatever chaos beomgyu is about to drag you into.

after a day of mentally wrestling with the absurdity of the situation, you find yourself standing in the middle of the field, arms crossed, glaring at beomgyu who’s leaning casually against a tree. the late afternoon sun casts a warm glow over the grass, but you’re too irritated to appreciate the scene.

“all right, i’m here,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady despite the anger bubbling under the surface. “let’s get this over with. what do you want?”

beomgyu straightens up, a lazy smile spreading across his face as he saunters over to you. “i’m glad you came,” he says, his tone almost too cheerful for your liking.

“don’t get used to it,” you snap back. “just tell me what you want so i can get on with my life.”

“well,” he starts, dragging out the word as if he’s savoring the moment, “i want you to be my girlfriend.”

you stare at him, blinking once, twice, as if you misheard him. “what?”

“you heard me,” he says, leaning in closer, his smile never wavering. “you. girlfriend. me.”

you can’t help but burst out laughing, the sound echoing across the empty field. “hell no! why would i do that? you can use any other girl on campus, why me?”

beomgyu’s smile fades slightly as he sighs, a sound that’s surprisingly genuine. “because if you don’t, i’ll tell your mom that you smoke.”

your laughter dies in your throat as the threat sinks in. “you wouldn’t.”

he raises an eyebrow, that infuriating smirk returning to his lips. “oh, i definitely would. you know how much your mom loves her position at the church. i see you every sunday, acting all sweet and innocent. i don’t think she’d be too happy to find out her little angel has a rebellious streak.”

your mind flashes back to that afternoon a few weeks ago. you were behind the campus, hidden by the trees, sneaking a cigarette to calm your nerves after a particularly rough exam. you thought you were alone—until you heard footsteps and turned to see beomgyu standing there, watching you with a knowing smirk. you had cursed under your breath and quickly stubbed out the cigarette, but the damage was done. he had seen you. and now, he was holding it over your head.

“you’re blackmailing me with this?” you ask incredulously, trying to wrap your head around the ridiculousness of the situation.

“desperate times call for desperate measures,” he says with a shrug, as if this is the most normal thing in the world.

“why?” you demand, crossing your arms tighter as you glare at him. “why do you even need a fake girlfriend?”

he sighs again, running a hand through his hair, messing it up even more. “i want to win her back,” he admits, his voice dropping slightly as if he’s embarrassed to say it out loud.

“who?” you ask, though you already have a sinking feeling you know the answer.

“mari,” he says, confirming your suspicion.

you scoff, remembering the campus gossip from a few weeks ago. everyone was talking about their breakup, how mari had dumped beomgyu out of the blue. some said she had grown tired of his playboy ways, others whispered that she had found someone better. you hadn’t paid much attention to it at the time—beomgyu’s love life was the least of your concerns—but now, it’s coming back to bite you.

“and you think dating me is going to make her jealous?” you ask, still incredulous at the audacity of his plan.

“exactly,” he says, a hint of desperation in his voice now. “she’s insecure about you. she’s envious of your achievements, your grades, how everyone seems to think you’re perfect. i know she’ll want me back if she thinks i’m dating you.”

you stare at him, mouth slightly open in disbelief. “are you fucking kidding me? why the hell would she be insecure about me? she’s mari. the girl who dumped you because you couldn’t keep it in your pants.”

beomgyu winces at your bluntness, but he doesn’t deny it. “look, i know it sounds crazy, but it’s true. she always felt like she couldn’t measure up to you, and if she sees us together, it’ll drive her nuts.”

you shake your head, backing away from him. “no way. i am not getting dragged into your drama. go find someone else to be your fake girlfriend, because i’m not interested. fuck off, beomgyu.”

you turn on your heel, ready to march off and leave this ridiculous conversation behind, but beomgyu calls after you, desperation creeping into his voice. “please. you’re the only one who can make this work.”

you pause, not because you’re considering it, but because you’re genuinely baffled by his persistence. “why me? why does it have to be me?”

he hesitates, then mutters, “because you’re the only one she’s ever seen as competition. if she thinks i’ve moved on to you, she’ll come running back.”

you blink at him, then let out a disbelieving laugh. “are you seriously asking me to pretend to date you just to win back some girl who’s insecure about me? you realize how insane that sounds, right?”

“i know,” he admits, looking genuinely frustrated now. “but it’s the only plan i’ve got. please, just think about it.”

“no,” you say firmly, shaking your head. “it doesn’t even make sense. i don’t know you, and you definitely don’t know me. there’s no way anyone would believe we’re actually dating. it’s just not going to work.”

you turn away from him for good this time. “i’m not going to be your pawn in some stupid game. you can deal with your own problems, beomgyu.”

and with that, you walk away, leaving him standing alone in the field, still trying to figure out how his plan went so wrong.

you walk away, determined to end this bizarre conversation, but beomgyu isn’t one to give up so easily. the next morning, you find him waiting for you outside your first class, leaning against the wall with a smug grin on his face.

“good morning, girlfriend,” he greets you, loud enough for a few students nearby to hear.

you glare at him, refusing to dignify his greeting with a response. instead, you push past him, but he quickly falls into step beside you, still grinning.

“so, did you think about it?” he asks, as if you’ve been considering his ridiculous proposal.

“not for a second,” you reply flatly, quickening your pace, but beomgyu easily keeps up with you.

“come on,” he coaxes, his tone almost teasing. “it’s not like i’m asking for much. just a little fake dating, a few hand-holding sessions, maybe a staged kiss or two...”

you stop walking and turn to face him, your patience already wearing thin. “beomgyu, do you honestly think that’s going to convince me? i have no interest in being part of your weird love triangle.”

“it’s not a triangle,” he corrects, as if that’s the main issue. “it’s more of a... strategic partnership. we both get something out of it.”

“and what exactly do i get out of this?” you ask, folding your arms. “other than a headache and a reputation i don’t want?”

“i’ll make sure you never have to stand in line at the cafeteria again,” he offers, grinning like he’s just proposed the deal of a lifetime. “plus, you’ll have the most popular guy on campus as your boyfriend. that’s gotta be worth something, right?”

“you mean the most annoying guy on campus,” you mutter, shaking your head. “no thanks, beomgyu.”

“okay, okay,” he says, raising his hands in mock surrender. “how about this: i’ll do all your homework for a month.”

“you can barely do your own homework,” you point out, continuing to walk.

“true,” he concedes, quickly catching up to you, “but i can get someone else to do it for me. i know people. you’ll get straight A's, guaranteed.”

“beomgyu, do you seriously think i’m that desperate?”

“desperate? no. smart? definitely,” he replies, that infuriating grin never leaving his face. “i mean, who wouldn’t want a personal assistant to take care of all the boring stuff?”

you stop again, turning to him with a deadpan expression. “do you hear yourself right now? do you really think any of this is convincing?”

he shrugs, not the least bit deterred. “i’m just trying to make it worth your while. besides, think about all the fun we could have. we can prank mari together, stage a dramatic breakup when it’s all over. i’ll even let you be the one to dump me in front of everyone.”

“tempting,” you say sarcastically, “but still a no.”

“you’re really making this difficult,” he sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. “what do i have to do to get you to say yes?”

“nothing,” you say firmly. “because it’s not happening. i’m not interested in fake dating you, or real dating you, or anything that involves you.”

he’s silent for a moment, his usual cocky demeanor slipping just a bit. “you know, i’m actually a decent guy when you get to know me.”

“i’m sure you are,” you reply, rolling your eyes. “but that doesn’t change the fact that i don’t want to be involved in your plan. besides, i don’t even know you, and you don’t know me. there's no way it would make sense that we would date.”

“then let’s get to know each other,” he says, a spark of determination in his eyes. “who knows? maybe you’ll actually like me.”

“highly doubtful,” you retort, turning to walk away again. “find someone else, beomgyu. i’m not interested.”

“but you’re the only one who can pull this off!” he calls after you, but you don’t bother responding.

you keep walking, determined to put as much distance between you and beomgyu as possible. but as you head to your next class, you can’t help but wonder how long he’s going to keep this up—and just how far he’s willing to go to get what he wants.

it’s a friday morning, and you’re already running late for your first class. the last thing you need is another encounter with beomgyu and his relentless pursuit of your agreement. as you swing open the door to your dorm room, ready to dart out, you freeze.

there he is. choi beomgyu, standing right outside your door with a bouquet of slightly wilted flowers in his hand. you groan inwardly, ready to tell him off again, but then you notice something—mari, the girl of his dreams, is also there, coming out of the room next door.

beomgyu straightens up immediately, his usually confident expression tinged with nervousness. he steps forward, holding out the flowers like a peace offering. “mari, these are for you,” he says, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

but mari doesn’t even glance at him. she just walks past, not even sparing him a second look. the flowers droop in his hand, along with his hopeful expression. he watches her walk away, the defeat so clear on his face that you almost feel bad for him. almost.

you find yourself stuck in place, watching this whole scene unfold. beomgyu’s shoulders slump, and he looks down at the flowers as if they’ve personally betrayed him. for a moment, he just stands there, staring at the empty hallway where mari disappeared, looking more lost than you’ve ever seen him.

against your better judgment, you feel a pang of sympathy. maybe he’s not just the arrogant playboy you’ve pegged him for. maybe he’s just a guy who got his heart broken and is trying desperately to fix it.

before you know it, you’re walking toward him. “beomgyu,” you call out, and his head snaps up, surprise flashing in his eyes when he sees you.

“hey,” he says, quickly trying to mask his disappointment with that familiar smirk. “come to finally say yes?”

“no,” you reply, but there’s less bite in your voice than usual. “i came to talk.”

his eyebrows shoot up, clearly not expecting that. “talk? about what? because if it’s about how ridiculous my plan is, i’ve already heard it.”

you roll your eyes. “no, idiot. i’m reconsidering your offer.”

he blinks at you, completely thrown off. “wait, what? you’re... considering it?”

“don’t make me repeat myself,” you snap, though there’s no real heat behind your words. “but before i say anything, we need to lay down some ground rules.”

beomgyu’s smirk returns, and he looks like a kid who just found out christmas came early. “oh, i’m all ears. name your terms.”

you cross your arms, trying to ignore the weird flutter in your chest as you meet his gaze. “first of all, no public displays of affection unless it’s absolutely necessary. and by necessary, i mean only when mari’s around.”

“deal,” he agrees instantly, like he’s already won.

“second, you keep your hands to yourself. no holding hands, no random hugs, and definitely no kissing.”

he holds up his hands in surrender. “got it. i’ll be on my best behavior.”

“third,” you continue, “this ‘relationship’ ends the second mari comes running back to you. no strings attached, no drama, we’re done. understood?”

“crystal clear,” beomgyu says, his grin widening. “so... does this mean you’re in?”

you hesitate, glancing down at the sad bouquet in his hand. it’s clear how much this means to him, even if it’s for the most ridiculous reason. you sigh, knowing full well you’re going to regret this.

“fine,” you mutter, avoiding his eyes. “but this is strictly business, okay?”

“of course,” he agrees, though you can see the glint of amusement in his eyes. “strictly business... with maybe a little bit of fun on the side?”

“no fun,” you correct him, trying to stay firm.

“right, right,” he nods, though his playful grin suggests otherwise. “so, when do we start, girlfriend?”

“don’t call me that,” you grumble, already regretting your decision.

“too late!” he singsongs, spinning around with a dramatic flourish. “oh, this is going to be so much fun.”

you groan, pinching the bridge of your nose. “what have i gotten myself into?”

“don’t worry,” beomgyu says, turning back to you with a wink. “you’ll thank me later. just wait till you see how jealous mari gets. she’s going to be begging me to take her back.”

“you’re delusional,” you mutter, but there’s no denying the tiny thrill of excitement that courses through you. maybe this won’t be so bad. or maybe it’ll be an absolute disaster. either way, you’re in for a wild ride.

“let’s get one thing straight,” you say, stepping closer to him, “i’m only doing this because i feel bad for you, not because i think it’s a good idea.”

“oh, i know,” beomgyu replies with a cheeky grin. “but by the end of this, you might just find out that fake dating me isn’t the worst thing in the world.”

“we’ll see about that,” you retort, but there’s a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. “just don’t mess this up, okay?”

“me? mess up? never,” he declares, puffing out his chest like a cartoon character.

you shake your head, already wondering how you’re going to survive this ridiculous arrangement without losing your mind—or worse, your heart.

you’ve barely had time to wrap your head around this whole fake-dating scheme when beomgyu drags you to meet his friends. the walk to their usual hangout spot is filled with his relentless chatter, and you try to mentally prepare yourself for the chaos you’re about to walk into.

“okay, remember,” beomgyu says, stopping just outside the door to the coffee shop. “just act natural. they’re going to love you.”

“they better,” you mutter, crossing your arms. “if this blows up in our faces, i’m blaming you.”

he just grins, as if your words are a challenge he’s more than ready to take on. “don’t worry. you’ll be fine.”

before you can reply, he pushes the door open, and you’re hit with the sound of laughter and the smell of coffee. the coffee shop is cozy, filled with a mix of students and locals, but your attention is immediately drawn to the group of guys at the back, who are currently in a heated debate over something that sounds like video game stats.

“yo, guys!” beomgyu announces with an exaggerated flourish as you walk in beside him. “look who i brought!”

you’re greeted by a chorus of surprised, then curious, expressions. soobin is the first to speak, his eyes widening as he takes you in. “whoa, beomgyu, did you finally bring someone who isn’t a disaster?”

“hey!” you protest, though you’re more amused than offended.

“don’t worry,” beomgyu says, nudging you with a smirk. “she’s definitely not a disaster. this is y/n.”

yeonjun squints at you, then at beomgyu. “wait, you’re dating now? i thought this was all just a bad joke.”

“it’s not a joke,” beomgyu says smoothly. “we’re officially... pretending to be a couple.”

hueningkai blinks at him, then bursts into laughter. “oh, this is going to be good. you two look like a sitcom couple.”

“what’s that supposed to mean?” you ask, raising an eyebrow.

“don’t worry about it,” taehyun says with a grin. “it’s just hueningkai being hueningkai. so, what’s your story, y/n? what made you agree to date our resident playboy?”

you start to explain, but soobin cuts you off, leaning forward with a mischievous glint in his eye. “i bet you didn’t know beomgyu is a world-class procrastinator, right? he’s probably going to forget to call you or something.”

“hey!” beomgyu protests, looking genuinely offended. “i’m not that bad!”

“so, tell us,” yeonjun asks, his gaze shifting between you and beomgyu. “what’s the deal with this fake dating? is it a revenge scheme or something?”

“more or less,” you say, giving them a quick rundown of the situation. “beomgyu wants to make someone jealous, and he’s roped me into it.”

taehyun snorts, shaking his head. “classic beomgyu move. always the dramatic one.”

“hey!” beomgyu says again, though he’s trying to hold back a smile. “i’m not dramatic. i’m just... creative.”

“creative?” hueningkai asks, looking genuinely puzzled. “is that what we’re calling this?”

“let’s just say,” you say, deciding to join in the fun, “it’s been an interesting experience so far.”

as the conversation continues, it becomes clear that beomgyu’s friends are a lively bunch, each adding their own flavor of chaos to the mix. there are jokes, random interjections, and a lot of laughter. by the end of the meal, you’re starting to feel like part of the gang—or at least, like you’re not completely out of place.

as you and beomgyu leave the cafe, you find yourself laughing more than you expected. “your friends are... something else,” you say, shaking your head.

“they’re the best,” beomgyu says with a grin. “you did great, though. handled them better than i expected.”

“don’t get used to it,” you reply, though there’s a hint of warmth in your tone. “i’m just here to do a job.”

“sure, sure,” beomgyu says, nudging you playfully. “but i bet you had fun.”

“maybe,” you admit, smiling despite yourself. “just don’t make me do this every day.”

beomgyu's plan to make mari jealous starts to take on a life of its own. what began as a strategic move to win her back morphs into something more complicated as you and beomgyu spend more time together.

you two are in the library, ostensibly studying, but the moment mari walks by, beomgyu wraps his arm around you, pulling you close. you pretend to be engrossed in your notes, but you can’t help but notice the satisfied smirk on beomgyu's face as he leans into you.

“this spot is really quiet,” he says, his voice low. “better for studying together, don’t you think?”

“sure,” you reply, trying to sound disinterested but feeling the warmth of his closeness. “if you say so.”

mari glances over, her eyes narrowing slightly before she walks away. as soon as she's out of sight, beomgyu lets out a dramatic sigh and releases you.

“that was exhausting,” you say, rolling your eyes. “i’m pretty sure we were laying it on thick.”

“hey, we have to sell it,” beomgyu says with a grin. “besides, you did great. mari’s definitely jealous now.”

later that week, you find yourselves at the campus cafe, where you and beomgyu have a standing routine of grabbing coffee after class. beomgyu is, as usual, trying to make you laugh with his ridiculous anecdotes, while you’re genuinely enjoying his company.

“so,” beomgyu says, leaning across the table with a mischievous grin, “what’s the verdict? are you having fun pretending to be my girlfriend?”

“oh, definitely,” you say sarcastically. “it’s like living in a sitcom where i’m the unwilling star.”

“hey, i’m not that bad,” beomgyu protests. “i can be quite charming when i want to be.”

“sure,” you reply with a smirk, “just make sure you don’t charm yourself into a real relationship. i’d hate to see you fall for me.”

“not going to happen,” he says, shaking his head. “but thanks for playing along. mari’s definitely noticed.”

beomgyu starts driving you home after class, a gesture that feels almost normal by now. he’s blasting music and singing along, much to your amusement.

“do you always sing like you’re auditioning for a reality show?” you ask, laughing as he hits a high note.

“only when i’m with you,” he says with a wink. “keeps things interesting.”

when you arrive at your place, you both linger outside your door, chatting casually. but as soon as beomgyu’s car is out of sight, you find yourself glancing at your phone, half expecting a text from him.

one day, you’re waiting outside your last class for beomgyu to show up, and you spot him walking towards you with a bouquet of flowers. it’s all very cliché, but it’s also kind of sweet.

“seriously?” you ask, raising an eyebrow. “flowers? is this part of the act?”

“yep,” beomgyu says with a grin. “i figured it might add a nice touch.”

you take the flowers, laughing despite yourself. “thanks, i guess. though i’m pretty sure this just makes us look like we’re in a rom-com.”

“yeah, whatever works,” beomgyu replies, shrugging. “besides, you look cute holding them.”

the more you two spend time together, the more natural it starts to feel. one day, you’re both in the middle of a heated debate about which pizza topping is superior. as you argue, you realize that you’re genuinely enjoying his company, and maybe you’re even starting to forget that this is all supposed to be fake.

“pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity,” you declare, laughing as beomgyu tries to defend his preference.

“you’re just not cultured enough to appreciate it,” he says, rolling his eyes. “i bet you don’t even like pineapple in general.”

“it’s not about liking pineapple,” you reply. “it’s about the fact that putting it on pizza is just... wrong.”

“you’re wrong,” beomgyu says with a smirk. “and i’m right. end of story.”

“we’ll see about that,” you say, sticking out your tongue playfully.

as the weeks go by, the lines between fake and real start to blur. you catch yourself feeling excited when you see beomgyu, and you even start to look forward to his antics. one day, taehyun catches you and beomgyu in one of your usual playful arguments.

“so,” taehyun says with a smirk, “how’s the fake dating going?”

you and beomgyu exchange a glance, and beomgyu shrugs. “it’s going well. why do you ask?”

“just curious,” taehyun says, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “it looks like you two are having more fun than you let on.”

“we’re just getting into character,” beomgyu says with a grin. “nothing more, nothing less.”

“uh-huh,” taehyun says skeptically. “i’ll believe it when i see it.”

beomgyu’s plan to win mari back is working better than expected, and the fake dating is starting to feel oddly real. you and beomgyu have settled into a rhythm of constant interaction, and your fake relationship has begun to blur with reality.

one afternoon, you’re hanging out at a local park, where beomgyu has suggested you both go for a “romantic stroll” as part of your act. it’s a beautiful day, and you find yourself genuinely enjoying the time spent together.

“i have to admit,” you say, smiling as you walk side by side, “this isn’t half bad.”

“see, i told you,” beomgyu says with a grin. “it’s all about making the best of it.”

you’re both casually chatting about your favorite movies when you spot mari walking towards you. immediately, you cling to beomgyu, leaning into him with exaggerated affection. beomgyu plays along, draping his arm around you and pulling you closer.

“hey, did you miss me?” he asks with a playful wink.

“oh, absolutely,” you reply, looking up at him with faux adoration.

mari’s eyes flicker with annoyance before she quickly walks past. as soon as she’s gone, you and beomgyu burst into laughter.

“that was something,” you say, trying to catch your breath.

“yeah, she definitely noticed,” beomgyu agrees, still chuckling. “good job.”

sometimes, though, you both forget about the act entirely. one evening, you’re lounging on beomgyu’s couch, the room dimly lit by the flickering glow of the TV. the movie is playing softly, but neither of you are paying much attention to the plot. instead, you find yourselves more engrossed in the warmth of each other’s presence.

beomgyu is sprawled out comfortably, and you’re leaning against him, your head resting on his shoulder. the fabric of his hoodie feels soft and comforting against your cheek. you both shift slightly, trying to find the perfect angle that makes the moment feel even more intimate. his arm drapes over your shoulders, pulling you closer. the gentle rise and fall of his chest with each breath creates a soothing rhythm, and the scent of his cologne is faint but pleasant.

“wait,” beomgyu says suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence. he glances over at you with a mischievous grin. just as you were about to shift away, he gently cups your face in his hands, his palms warm against your skin. you freeze for a moment, your breath catching as his fingers lightly brush your hair away from your face. beomgyu’s touch is tender and surprisingly intimate, and he adjusts himself to make you more comfortable, guiding you back into a position where you can both settle in.

“you’re not going anywhere,” he murmurs, his voice low and soft. his touch lingers just a bit longer than necessary, and you can feel the warmth of his hands spreading through you. as you look up at him, his gaze is steady and affectionate, making you feel unexpectedly cherished. the room seems to shrink around you both, leaving only the gentle hum of the movie and the comforting presence of each other.

when taehyun sees you two like this, he can’t help but tease.

“hmm…” he murmurs with a smirk, “looks like the fake dating has become a bit too real.”

you and beomgyu exchange a glance, and beomgyu shrugs with a grin. “maybe. or maybe we’re just really good at this.”

“sure,” taehyun says, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “just remember, i’m watching.”

the night was comfortably cool, the perfect backdrop for a sleepover at soobin’s place. the living room was strewn with blankets and pillows, snacks scattered on the coffee table, and the remnants of a half-finished pizza sat in a greasy box nearby. the boys—yeonjun, soobin, beomgyu, taehyun, and hueningkai—were lounging around, their limbs tangled in a mess of relaxed exhaustion. they’d spent the evening playing games, arguing over who had the best strategy, and yelling at the screen during the latest action movie they’d decided to watch. the room buzzed with the warmth of camaraderie and the occasional burst of laughter.

“i’m telling you, that boss was a complete cheat,” yeonjun groaned, stretching out on the floor with a hand thrown dramatically over his eyes. “like, how are we supposed to beat something that can regenerate every five seconds?”

soobin chuckled from where he was sitting against the couch, a game controller still in his hand. “you just have to be good, yeonjun.”

“says the guy who died like five times before i even got to the boss fight,” yeonjun shot back, making the others snicker.

“hey, i was figuring out the strategy!” soobin protested, but even he was laughing now.

“yeah, yeah, keep telling yourself that,” taehyun added with a smirk as he sprawled out on the other side of the couch, idly tossing a pillow in the air and catching it.

hueningkai, who had been uncharacteristically quiet for a while, suddenly piped up, “so, beomgyu, how’s the whole fake dating thing going with you and y/n?”

at the mention of your name, all eyes turned to beomgyu, who had been absentmindedly scrolling through his phone. he looked up, a slightly startled expression on his face, before a casual smile spread across his lips.

“oh, it’s going pretty well, actually,” beomgyu replied, trying to sound nonchalant. “we’ve been doing our thing, you know, making sure mari sees us together and all that. she definitely seems to be noticing.”

“is she jealous yet?” yeonjun asked, leaning in with a mischievous glint in his eye.

beomgyu hesitated for a moment before shrugging. “i think so? she’s been giving us weird looks every time she sees us together. i’d say the plan is working.”

“but how’s it working for you?” soobin asked, an eyebrow raised. “like, do you actually enjoy spending time with y/n, or is it just all for the show?”

beomgyu opened his mouth to respond, but hueningkai beat him to it, his eyes narrowing slightly as he watched his friend. “you seem to be enjoying it a lot,” hueningkai said, his voice light but pointed. “like, when you were just talking about it now, you looked… happy.”

beomgyu blinked, caught off guard by the observation. “what? no, i mean, yeah, it’s fun. y/n’s cool to hang out with and all, but it’s just for the plan, you know? to make mari jealous.”

“is it, though?” taehyun asked, tilting his head with a curious expression. “because you seemed way more into talking about y/n than you did when you mentioned mari.”

beomgyu frowned, a flicker of confusion crossing his face. “what are you talking about? of course i’m focused on mari. that’s the whole point.”

“but are you?” soobin chimed in, leaning forward with a thoughtful look. “because from what we’ve seen, it looks like you’re more focused on y/n these days.”

“you even stopped mentioning mari’s name in the group chat,” yeonjun added with a teasing grin. “but you bring up y/n all the time. and don’t think we didn’t notice you humming that song she likes the other day.”

beomgyu’s mouth opened and closed, struggling to find the right words. “okay, maybe i’ve been spending a lot of time with y/n, but that’s because of the plan. we have to make it convincing, right?”

hueningkai shook his head, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “you’re convincing someone, all right. but i’m not sure if it’s mari.”

“oh, come on, guys,” beomgyu said, a hint of defensiveness creeping into his tone. “you’re reading way too much into this. i’m just playing my part.”

“sure,” taehyun said, his voice dripping with skepticism. “but here’s the thing—sometimes people get a little too into character, if you know what i mean.”

beomgyu’s gaze flickered between his friends, his mind racing to come up with a counterargument. but the more he thought about it, the more he realized that they might be onto something. lately, he had found himself looking forward to spending time with you, even when it wasn’t necessary for the plan. he enjoyed your banter, the way you laughed at his stupid jokes, the way you leaned into him when you were watching movies together. but surely that didn’t mean anything… right?

“i’m not… i’m not falling for her, if that’s what you’re trying to say,” beomgyu finally said, though his voice lacked the usual confidence. “i’m just… having fun with the whole thing. it’s all part of the game.”

“hmm,” yeonjun hummed, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “if you say so, but don’t be surprised if you wake up one day and realize you’re actually into y/n.”

“that’s not going to happen,” beomgyu insisted, crossing his arms over his chest. “we have an agreement. we’re just helping each other out.”

“whatever helps you sleep at night,” soobin said with a chuckle, shaking his head. “just don’t come crying to us when you realize you’ve caught feelings.”

“i’m not catching feelings,” beomgyu muttered, though his voice sounded less convincing by the second.

the conversation drifted to other topics, but the doubt lingered in beomgyu’s mind. he replayed his interactions with you, trying to convince himself that it was all just part of the act. but as his friends continued to laugh and joke around him, beomgyu found his thoughts drifting back to you, to the warmth of your smile, the comfort of your presence.

and for the first time, he wasn’t so sure if he was just playing a part anymore.

as the week went on, the lines between what was real and what was pretend began to blur for beomgyu. it started subtly, with small moments that seemed insignificant at first but gradually became more difficult to ignore.

the first time was when you both were walking home from campus. the sun was setting, casting a warm glow over everything, and for once, you weren’t paying attention to whether mari was around. beomgyu had his hands shoved in his pockets, trying to act casual, but then you stumbled on a crack in the sidewalk. without thinking, beomgyu reached out and grabbed your hand, steadying you. instead of letting go, you kept your fingers intertwined with his, and you both walked the rest of the way like that, your hands swinging gently between you. neither of you said anything about it, but beomgyu couldn’t stop the small smile that tugged at his lips.

a few days later, you invited beomgyu over to your place to help with some studying. you had an important test coming up, and beomgyu had offered to help you review the material. you both sat on your bed, textbooks spread out in front of you, but as the hours passed, the studying slowly turned into something else. you started playfully quizzing each other, turning the most boring facts into jokes that had you both laughing until your sides hurt. at some point, beomgyu’s head ended up on your lap, and you absentmindedly started running your fingers through his hair while you talked about everything except the test. it felt natural, easy—like you’d done this a thousand times before. neither of you even noticed the time passing until it was late, and beomgyu found himself reluctant to leave.

another day had passed, you and beomgyu are slumped at your place again for another study session. the day had been long and exhausting, and you both needed a break from the relentless grind of academic life. you set up in your room, where you both sank into the comfortable chaos of textbooks and notes strewn about.

as you worked side by side, the air between you felt charged with a different kind of energy than usual. your conversations had taken on a more personal tone, and you found yourselves laughing and teasing each other more frequently. the proximity of being so close, sitting on the edge of your bed with barely any space between you, felt oddly intimate.

eventually, you found yourselves lying back against the pillows, the study session long forgotten. the room was dimly lit by the soft glow of your desk lamp, casting shadows on the walls. you were discussing something trivial, your faces only inches apart, when the conversation started to drift away from the mundane and towards something more personal.

beomgyu’s gaze dropped to your lips, his eyes dark with something you couldn’t quite place. he reached out, brushing a stray strand of hair from your face, and the touch was surprisingly gentle. your breath caught, and for a moment, the world seemed to pause around you.

he moved closer, and you felt the warmth of his breath against your skin. it was as if the entire room had shrunk to just the two of you. his lips were so close to yours that you could almost feel the softness of them, but just before the kiss could happen, you instinctively pulled back.

“beomgyu…” you began, but your voice trailed off, unsure of how to voice the confusion and intensity of the moment.

beomgyu didn’t pull away. instead, he held your hand to the side, his fingers intertwined with yours. his eyes were searching yours, and then he slowly lowered his forehead to rest against yours. the touch was light, almost electric, and it made your heart race in a way you hadn’t expected.

he smiled, a goofy, tender smile that seemed to light up his whole face. “we should probably stop before we both do something we’ll regret,” he murmured, his voice warm and soft.

you couldn’t help but smile back, despite the whirlwind of emotions stirring inside you. “yeah,” you said, though the word felt inadequate to describe the mix of feelings bubbling up.

you stayed like that for a while, foreheads touching, hands clasped, sharing a quiet, intimate moment that felt like it was suspended in time. it wasn’t quite a kiss, but it was something that seemed to say more than words ever could. the tension between you both was palpable, but for now, this closeness was enough.

by the end of the week, you both had a habit of texting each other goodnight, a ritual that wasn’t part of the original plan. it had started as a simple check-in, a way to make sure you were both still on the same page with the whole fake dating thing. but soon, the texts became longer, more personal. you’d talk about your day, share random thoughts, and sometimes even vent about things that were bothering you. one night, as you both lay in your respective beds, you texted him about how stressed you were about an upcoming project. without thinking, beomgyu called you, his voice soft and comforting as he reassured you that you’d do great. you talked on the phone until you were both too tired to keep your eyes open, and as you said goodnight, beomgyu realized that he was looking forward to these conversations more than anything else.

each of these moments felt like something more, something real, but neither of you acknowledged it. you both continued the act, telling yourselves that it was all for mari’s sake, but the truth was becoming harder to deny. the time you spent together wasn’t about making someone else jealous anymore—it was about enjoying each other’s company, about the comfort and happiness you found in each other. and the more it happened, the less beomgyu could ignore the fact that his feelings were beginning to shift.

you’re sprinting down the hallways to beomgyu’s dorm room, the excitement bubbling inside you like a pot about to boil over. you’ve agreed to have dinner together, and for some reason, today feels different. the anticipation is almost palpable, and you find yourself grinning as you approach his door.

when you reach his room, beomgyu is already standing outside, waiting for you. as soon as he sees you, his face lights up with a warm, genuine smile. his arms open wide, and you don’t hesitate to leap into his embrace. the hug is snug and comforting, and you relish the moment, closing your eyes and breathing in the familiar scent of his cologne. it feels like a slice of normalcy in the midst of everything else.

but after a few moments, the cozy warmth of the hug starts to feel a bit too intense. you pull back slightly, your mind suddenly racing. why did you react so eagerly? and why were you so excited to see beomgyu in the first place? there’s no way in hell that mari is here, so why did you just jump into his arms like that?

you push the thoughts aside and try to focus on the dinner ahead. beomgyu chats about the new place he found for dinner, and you laugh at his enthusiastic descriptions. but the question lingers in your mind, gnawing at you throughout the evening.

as soon as you woke up the next morning, you decide you need to talk to someone about these confusing feelings. you meet up with your friend in the library, a quiet spot where you can discuss things without too much interruption. you settle into a corner with a stack of textbooks and a cup of coffee, you spill everything. you recount the moments with beomgyu, the playful arguments, the unexpected intimacy, and the recent realization of your growing attachment. you talk about how he’s started to feel like more than just a partner in a fake relationship.

your friend listens intently, her expression shifting from curiosity to something more knowing as you speak. when you finish, she leans back, taking a sip of her coffee before giving you a serious look.

“uh… girl,” she starts, her tone a mix of sympathy and amusement, “you like him.”

the words hit you like a ton of bricks. you stare at her, feeling as if the ground beneath you has suddenly given way. flashbacks of your time with beomgyu flood your mind—his laughter, the way he looked at you, the way he made you feel. the memories you’d convinced yourself were just part of the act now seem so much more significant.

“no,” you say, shaking your head, trying to deny it, but the truth is clear in your heart. “no way. it’s just—”

“it’s not just anything,” your friend interrupts gently. “you’re not just pretending anymore. you’re feeling something real.”

the weight of her words settles over you, and you find yourself sinking into a deep realization. everything you’ve felt for beomgyu, the warmth, the excitement, the moments of genuine connection—they’re not just part of the act. they’ve become something real, something beyond the pretense you started with.

you sit in silence, trying to process the overwhelming truth. the fake relationship you thought was just a game has turned into something you can’t ignore. and now, more than ever, you’re forced to confront the fact that your feelings for beomgyu are anything but fake. your friend reaches over, giving your hand a reassuring squeeze. “so what are you going to do?”

before you can answer, beomgyu walks into the library, a casual smile on his face. he’s clearly lost in thought, and before you can react, he leans down and plants a soft kiss on your forehead. the gesture is so natural, so unguarded, that it makes your heart skip a beat.

your friend’s eyes widen at the sight, and you feel yourself blushing furiously. you force a smile and quickly stand up, pulling beomgyu out of the library. “hey, let’s go. we’ve got plans.”

beomgyu looks at you with a puzzled expression, but he follows your lead. as you walk down the hall, you can’t help but replay the kiss in your mind, your friend’s words echoing in your ears. you’re left grappling with the realization that your feelings for beomgyu are more than just part of the fake relationship you started. you’re walking side by side with beomgyu, your mind racing with thoughts and emotions. the kiss on your forehead from earlier still lingers in your mind, and the weight of your friend's revelation feels heavier with every step.

as you reach a quiet corner of the campus, you finally stop, turning to face beomgyu. he looks at you, his expression open and curious.

“beomgyu,” you start, trying to steady your voice, “why do you keep doing things like that? like kissing me on the forehead or hugging me? it’s starting to feel... more real, and I need to understand why.”

beomgyu’s face flushes slightly, and he looks genuinely perplexed. “what do you mean? i thought we were just playing the part. i didn’t think it was a big deal.”

“it is a big deal!” you snap, your frustration boiling over. “i thought this was just a game, but it’s like you’re crossing lines without realizing it. and now, i’m confused about everything. about us.”

beomgyu’s eyes widen in surprise, and he opens his mouth to respond, but you cut him off. “you keep acting like you care, but when i try to talk about it, you just brush it off. what am i supposed to think?”

the argument escalates, voices rising as you both express your frustrations. emotions are raw and tangled, and neither of you is entirely sure how to untangle them.

just as you’re about to turn and walk away, beomgyu reaches out and grabs your hand, his grip gentle but firm. “wait,” he says quietly, his voice almost a whisper. “i… i don’t know why i do that myself.”

the simple, honest admission hits you hard. your eyes fill with tears, and you struggle to keep your composure. you were expecting something that would make you want to run into his arms, to hear something that would make sense of your feelings. but instead, his words are a confirmation of your fears—that he’s just as confused as you are.

you pull your hand away, your tears threatening to spill over. “if you don’t know why you’re doing this, then how am i supposed to understand? i need more than uncertainty, beomgyu. i need to know where we stand.”

beomgyu looks at you, his own confusion evident. “but... i thought... i thought we had something. i wanted to... i don’t know, i wanted to be close to you. is this too much?”

the sincerity in his voice makes your heart ache, but you can’t ignore the clarity you need. you take a step back, shaking your head. “well then i need to figure things out for myself, i guess. let go of my hand, please.”

with that, you turn and walk away, leaving beomgyu standing there, his face a mixture of hurt and confusion. he watches you go, the weight of the moment settling heavily on his shoulders. he’s left alone, grappling with his own tangled feelings and the realization that he doesn’t have all the answers.

as you disappear from view, beomgyu is left in a storm of his own emotions. he’s unsure of what he really wants or why he’s acted the way he has, but he knows he misses the clarity and the connection he had with you.

just like that, you were gone from beomgyu’s life. each day without him felt like a piece of you had been torn away, leaving a raw ache that settled deep in your bones. it was an emptiness that you didn’t know how to fill, a gnawing pain that woke you up in the middle of the night and made your days feel like a blur. you tried to push it away, to ignore the memories that crept in at the edges of your mind, but they were relentless. the way beomgyu had looked at you, the way he had said he thought you had something—it haunted you. it made you feel sick to your stomach, a twisting, nauseating sensation that wouldn’t leave.

this wasn’t what you had planned. none of this was supposed to happen. you were supposed to play the part, help him out, and move on. you weren’t supposed to fall in love with him.

the last day of the week finally arrived, and with it came the same dull ache that had been with you since you last spoke to beomgyu. you had been avoiding him, avoiding his friends, avoiding everything that reminded you of him. but it was impossible to avoid your own thoughts. they swirled around you, suffocating and relentless.

you hadn’t planned on seeing beomgyu again so soon, but he had tried to talk to you just a day after your confrontation. you had thought that maybe, just maybe, you could clear the air. but it had only made everything worse.

the memory of that conversation played over and over in your mind like a broken record.

“what are we, really? what do you want us to be?” you had asked him, your voice trembling with nerves. you hated how vulnerable you felt, how exposed.

he had looked down, his brows furrowed as if he was deep in thought. but to you, it felt like he was stalling, like he didn’t know what to say—or worse, like he didn’t care enough to say anything.

“you’re still in love with her, right?” the words had slipped out before you could stop them. you had forced a smile, trying to lighten the mood, but it felt hollow. “funny of me, i almost forgot why we’re here in the first place.”

he didn’t respond, and his silence felt like a knife twisting in your chest.

“well,” you had said, standing up to leave, “i guess we can let everybody know that we’ve already broken up, yeah?” you tried to sound casual, but your voice wavered.

that’s when he had finally looked up, and you had seen it—his eyes were red, swollen, like he had spent the night crying. your heart had twisted at the sight, but you couldn’t bring yourself to ask him about it. you had convinced yourself it was because of mari.

“what?” he had whispered, his voice cracking.

“let’s break the deal. this is where we draw the line, beomgyu.” you had forced a smile, trying to hide the tears that were threatening to spill over. “one of our deals was not to fall, right? well, it broke. i broke it.”

you had laughed bitterly, trying to brush it off, but the pain was too real, too raw.

and then, in the softest whisper, he had said, “and if i told you i broke it first?”

you hadn’t heard him clearly. the wind had chosen that exact moment to gust past, carrying his words away. “what?” you had asked, your heart pounding in your chest, desperate to understand, but at the same time terrified of what he might say.

he chuckled to himself, a bitter, hollow sound that made your skin prickle with unease. it was as if the universe had conspired against him, against the both of you, making sure that this moment, this crucial confession, was lost to the wind. the absurdity of it all struck him, and his chuckle turned into a resigned laugh, a sound that held no joy, only the weight of what could have been.

“what?” you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper, the situation feeling more and more surreal by the second. the laughter that bubbled out of him only deepened the confusion, as if the universe was playing some cruel joke on you both.

but he had stayed silent after that, his gaze dropping to the ground, a heavy, unspoken truth lingering in the space between you. it was like he had accepted the inevitable, that the universe had already made its decision, and fighting it was pointless.

you stood there for a moment, waiting, hoping he might say something—anything—that would make sense of this mess, but nothing came. the silence was deafening, a void that swallowed any last remnants of hope you had left.“i’m going now,” you finally said, your voice trembling as you turned your back on him, trying to keep your composure. you couldn’t bear to stay any longer, not when the weight of unspoken words hung so heavily in the air. “congrats on winning her again in advance.”

and with those words, you walked away, leaving beomgyu standing there, the echo of your footsteps fading into the distance as he watched you disappear. a part of you hoped he would call out to you, stop you, explain himself. but he didn’t, and that silence spoke louder than any words ever could. you didn’t see the way beomgyu looked at you, didn’t hear him whisper, “fucking coward…” to himself.

since that day, you had done everything you could to avoid him. but rumors had a way of finding you, and when you heard that mari had been seen with beomgyu again, it had felt like a punch to the gut. you had told yourself it was just gossip, that people were reading too much into things. but now, standing there in the hallway, frozen in place, you couldn’t deny what you were seeing.

there they were—mari and beomgyu, walking together, her arm looped around his as if nothing had ever happened, as if you had never existed in his life.

fuck.

the sight of them together sent a wave of nausea crashing over you. you barely made it to the nearest bathroom before the bile rose in your throat. you retched, your stomach heaving violently, but nothing came out. it wasn’t food poisoning or heartburn. it was heartbreak, pure and simple, tearing you apart from the inside out.

you gripped the edge of the sink, breathing heavily, trying to steady yourself. you couldn’t let this get to you. you were stronger than this. you knew these feelings would fade eventually, but right now, they felt like they were drowning you.

you splashed cold water on your face, trying to wash away the tears that had mingled with your sweat. when you looked up into the mirror, you barely recognized the person staring back at you. your eyes were red-rimmed, your face pale, and you looked… broken.

“get a grip,” you whispered to yourself, your voice shaky. “you’re more than this. you’re more than him.”

but even as you said the words, you didn’t believe them. the image of mari wrapped around beomgyu was seared into your mind, a painful reminder that you had fallen for someone who was never yours to begin with.

you took a deep breath, trying to gather your strength. you couldn’t fall apart now. not when you had been so close to moving on, to putting this all behind you. but the truth was, you weren’t ready. you didn’t know when you would be. all you knew was that the pain was still there, lurking just beneath the surface, waiting for any excuse to pull you back under.

as you stared at your reflection, you realized that you had two choices. you could let this destroy you, or you could find a way to move on. but how do you move on from something that was never real to begin with? how do you heal from a wound that was self-inflicted, from a love that was built on lies?

the questions swirled in your mind, unanswered and unrelenting. you didn’t have the answers yet, but you knew one thing for certain—you couldn’t keep going like this. something had to change. you had to find a way to let go of beomgyu, even if it felt like tearing your own heart out in the process.

the days passed slowly, each one dragging you further into a state of numbness. it was as if the world had lost its color, everything dull and muted in the wake of your heartbreak. and every time you saw beomgyu with mari, that numbness would briefly be shattered, replaced by a sharp, stabbing pain that left you breathless.

the first time after that hallway encounter, you saw them at the coffee shop near campus. they were sitting at a table by the window, mari laughing at something beomgyu had said. you froze in your tracks, heart pounding in your chest. and then beomgyu looked up, his eyes meeting yours. there was something in his gaze, something you couldn’t quite place. it wasn’t guilt, but it wasn’t indifference either. it was something that made your stomach twist in knots, something you didn’t want to identify, didn’t want to recognize.

you quickly turned away, pretending you hadn’t seen them, and hurried out of the coffee shop, your chest tight with the effort of holding back tears.

the next time, it was in the library. you had been trying to focus on your work, burying yourself in your studies to distract yourself from the thoughts of beomgyu that never seemed to leave you alone. and then, out of the corner of your eye, you saw them—mari and beomgyu, walking down one of the aisles, his hand resting lightly on her back as they searched for a book.

you tried to look away, to focus on the words in front of you, but your eyes betrayed you, flickering back to them again and again. and then, as if he could feel your gaze, beomgyu looked over at you. again, that look. that look that held something you couldn’t decipher, something that made your heart clench painfully in your chest.

you quickly gathered your things and left the library, your hands shaking as you tried to hold yourself together.

and then there was the time in the cafeteria, when you saw them sitting together at a table, sharing a meal. beomgyu’s eyes met yours as soon as you walked in, and for a moment, it felt like the whole world had stopped. there was that look again, the one that made you feel like you were on the verge of understanding something, but the moment you reached for it, it slipped away, leaving you more confused and hurt than before.

you didn’t stay in the cafeteria. you couldn’t. you turned on your heel and walked out, the ache in your chest growing stronger with each passing day.

it was unbearable, this constant reminder of what you had lost, of what you had never truly had in the first place. and every time you saw them together, it felt like a fresh wound, reopening the pain you had been trying so hard to heal.

but what hurt the most was that look in beomgyu’s eyes. that look that you couldn’t understand, that you didn’t want to understand. because deep down, you knew that if you tried to figure it out, if you tried to decipher what it meant, you would only end up hurting yourself more.

so you avoided him as best you could, avoided the places you knew he would be, avoided the people who might mention him. but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t avoid the memories, couldn’t avoid the thoughts that haunted you day and night.

and every time you saw him, every time you caught that look in his eyes, it felt like the ground was slipping out from under you, like you were falling all over again. but this time, there was no one to catch you. no one to stop the pain from tearing you apart.and so, you kept running, kept trying to escape the feelings that threatened to consume you. but no matter how far you ran, you couldn’t outrun the truth. you had fallen for beomgyu, and now you were paying the price.

you were tucked away in the quietest corner of the library, the soft rustle of pages turning the only sound accompanying your thoughts. you’d chosen this spot deliberately, hoping to escape into your books and leave everything else behind. but even in the silence, your mind was anything but quiet. every word you read seemed to dissolve into thoughts of him—of beomgyu, and the way he had infiltrated your every waking moment.

the door to the library creaked open, but you didn’t look up. you heard footsteps approaching, slow and deliberate, until they stopped right beside you. the chair opposite you scraped against the floor as it was pulled out. you didn’t need to look to know who it was. you could tell by the way the air seemed to shift around you, by the way your pulse quickened involuntarily.

“mari’s not here,” you said flatly, eyes still fixed on the page in front of you.

“i know,” beomgyu’s voice was quiet, almost hesitant. “i’m not here for her.”

“then who?” you finally turned a page, though you hadn’t read a single word.

“you. i need to talk to you.”

you clenched your jaw, refusing to look at him. “we’ve already talked.”

there was a brief pause, and when he spoke again, his voice was softer. “please?”

“what did i say?” you mumbled, your resolve wavering slightly.

he shifted in his seat, leaning closer. “can you at least look at me while you say it?” he whispered, the proximity of his voice sending a shiver down your spine.

you took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his words pressing against your heart. “fine,” you said, finally lifting your gaze to meet his. “no. i don’t want to talk to you.”

beomgyu’s eyes searched yours, as if trying to find something, anything, that might contradict your words. “come on,” he said softly, his voice laced with a kind of desperation you weren’t used to hearing from him. “one last time?”

you stared at him for a moment, your heart pounding in your chest. “say it here,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

beomgyu bit his lip, his expression troubled as he looked down at the table, gathering his thoughts. He took a deep breath, his shoulders rising and falling as if he was about to say something that had been weighing on him for a long time. “look, i know you’ve been seeing mari and i around these past few days and—”

“and i don’t care,” you cut him off, the words coming out harsher than you intended. you looked away again, trying to ignore the sting of tears that threatened to spill.

he pursed his lips, his eyes flickering with something you couldn’t quite place. “i know you don’t,” he said quietly. “but i… i care about what you think.”

his words hit you like a punch to the gut, knocking the air out of your lungs. you froze, your mind reeling as you tried to comprehend what he had just said. there was something in his voice, something raw and vulnerable that you hadn’t expected. and just like that, all the walls you had built around your heart started to crumble.

panic surged through you, and without thinking, you stood up abruptly, the chair scraping loudly against the floor. you didn’t care that people were staring, didn’t care about the noise you’d made. all you cared about was getting away from him, from the confusion and the pain that threatened to consume you.

you ran out of the library, your footsteps echoing through the empty halls as you made your way to the school field. the sky was already painted in hues of gray and blue as the sun began to set, but you barely noticed. you stopped in the middle of the field, doubling over as you tried to catch your breath, your heart pounding in your chest.

you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to force the tears back, but it was no use. they fell anyway, hot and heavy, as you let out a shaky breath. you hated this feeling, this sinking sensation in your chest that made you feel like you were being swallowed whole. why did he have to say that? why did he have to make things even more complicated when you were already trying so hard to move on?

you exhaled loudly, swiping at the tears that kept escaping despite your best efforts. and then you heard it—the sound of footsteps pounding against the grass, getting closer and closer. you didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. you could feel his presence before you even saw him.

when you finally did turn, there he was—beomgyu, panting as he stopped in his tracks a few feet away from you. his hair was slightly disheveled, and there was a desperate look in his eyes that made your heart twist painfully in your chest.

“why do you have to do this?” you asked, your voice cracking.

“do what?” beomgyu said, still trying to catch his breath.

“this,” you gestured between the two of you, your voice thick with emotion. “why can’t you just leave me alone?”

he looked at you, his brows furrowed in confusion. “what do you mean?”

“fuck, can’t you understand that i’m avoiding you?” you said, your voice rising with frustration.

“i know,” he admitted, his eyes never leaving yours. “that’s what i’m wondering.”

you let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. “wondering? you’re actually wondering why i’m avoiding you?”

“yes,” he said, his voice tinged with desperation. “why? why are you avoiding me?”

before you could answer, a loud crack of thunder echoed in the distance, and as if on cue, the sky opened up, rain pouring down in thick sheets. you could barely hear anything over the roar of the storm, but you could still hear him. you could still hear the hurt in his voice, the confusion, the desperation.

“you’re supposed to be fine now,” you said, your voice trembling. “mari’s back. you have her back already. don’t break a sweat over me.”

beomgyu took a step closer, the rain soaking through his clothes, but he didn’t seem to care. “why did you stop seeing me after that day?” he asked, his voice barely audible over the downpour.

you shook your head, refusing to meet his gaze. “didn’t you hear me? go back to mari now.”

but he didn’t move. instead, he took another step closer, his eyes locked onto yours. “why did you stop seeing me after that day?” he asked again, his voice firmer this time, demanding an answer.

you swallowed hard, your heart racing in your chest. you could feel the tears mixing with the rain on your cheeks, could feel the way your resolve was slowly crumbling under his gaze. “because i crossed the line,” you finally whispered, the words barely making it past your lips.

beomgyu’s eyes widened in surprise, and for a moment, he was silent, the rain continuing to pour down around you. then, he spoke, his voice soft, almost tender. “did you even ask if i crossed the line too?”

you looked up at him, your breath catching in your throat. “what?” you asked, your voice barely audible over the rain.

“you didn’t even ask if i crossed the line too,” he repeated, his eyes searching yours for some kind of understanding.

“why would i?” you asked, your voice wavering. “why would i ask that?”

“because i was waiting,” he said, his voice cracking slightly. “i was waiting for you to ask me. until now. i was waiting, y/n.”

you stared at him, your heart pounding in your chest. the rain was coming down harder now, soaking through your clothes, but you barely noticed. all you could see was him—all you could hear were his words, echoing in your mind.

“waiting for what?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. you could feel the weight of his gaze on you, could feel the way his words were slowly breaking down the walls you had built around your heart.

beomgyu took another step closer, and now he was only inches away from you. his hand reached out, hesitating for a moment before gently cupping your cheek, his thumb brushing away a tear that had mixed with the rain. “i was waiting for you to ask me,” he repeated softly, his voice full of emotion. “because i wanted you to know that i crossed the line too. i crossed it the moment i realized i cared about you more than i ever cared about anyone else.”

your breath hitched in your throat, your mind reeling as you tried to process his words. “what are you saying?” you asked, your voice trembling.

“i’m saying that mari and i aren’t back together,” beomgyu said, his eyes locked onto yours. “we never were. we both decided we didn’t want to get back together. and do you know why?”

you shook your head, unable to speak, unable to think.

“because i realized that what i wanted—what i needed—was you,” he said, his voice breaking slightly on the last word.

you felt your heart skip a beat, your breath catching in your throat. “beomgyu…” you started, but he cut you off.

“no, listen to me,” he said, his voice urgent. “i know i’ve hurt you. i know i’ve made mistakes. but i need you to understand that this… this thing between us, it’s not something i can just ignore. it’s not something i want to ignore.”

“but i can’t…” you whispered, your voice trembling.

“why?” beomgyu asked, his eyes searching yours, desperate for an answer.

“yeah, i was also wondering why?” yeonjun’s voice snapped him back to reality, breaking the heavy silence with an uncomfortable question. his arm was lazily draped around his girlfriend’s shoulder, fingers tracing slow circles on her arm like it was the easiest thing in the world.

beomgyu’s shoulders tensed. he tried to shrug it off, but the weight of the past still clung to him, suffocating. “i don’t know,” he muttered, forcing a weak smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “can we just... change the topic?”

his friends exchanged glances. the table fell into an awkward silence, the kind that makes you painfully aware of every second dragging by. beomgyu could feel the weight of their stares, each one laced with concern, curiosity... and pity. god, he hated pity.

soobin was the first to speak up, his voice soft but probing, “don’t tell us you still haven’t moved on?”

beomgyu’s jaw clenched. he didn’t answer. instead, he dropped his gaze to his phone, scrolling aimlessly through the home screen—anything to avoid meeting their eyes. the memories of you, of that night, of your final words, were like ghosts that refused to leave him alone.

“come on, gyu,” taehyun chimed in, leaning forward with that look of hesitant sympathy. “it’s been years. you can’t keep... holding on.”

but beomgyu didn’t respond. his thumb hovered over the screen, frozen. he couldn’t tell them that no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t let go. that the thought of you—your voice, your smile, your scent—still haunted him.

and then, he heard it. a voice. not just any voice, but a name, your name, cutting through the low hum of the party like a punch to the gut.

his heart stuttered. slowly, he lifted his head, searching through the crowd, scanning faces. and that’s when he saw you. or rather, your back—long, wavy hair cascading down, brushing just above your waist. you were wearing a black silk dress, elegant and simple, the kind of dress that made you look effortlessly beautiful.

he blinked, trying to convince himself he was hallucinating, that it couldn’t be you. but then you turned.

and there it was. that smile. the smile he hadn’t seen in years but could still picture perfectly.

the room around him seemed to blur, the voices of his friends fading into the background. everything, everyone, became a distant hum as his eyes locked onto you. it was like the world had pressed pause, and all that existed was you.

“gyu?” yeonjun’s girlfriend whispered, gently nudging him. “you okay?”

he wasn’t. he wasn’t okay at all.

because there you were, laughing, hugging someone, completely unaware of him, and it hit him all over again. the overwhelming realization that you had moved on, that your life had continued without him in it. the years of unanswered questions, of wondering what could’ve been, came crashing down.

“is that...?” kai trailed off, squinting at you from across the room.

“it is,” soobin said quietly. “it’s y/n.”

beomgyu swallowed hard. his throat was dry, his palms clammy. he didn’t know what to do, how to react. he had imagined this moment—seeing you again—a hundred times in his head. but none of those versions had prepared him for the way his heart would ache, seeing you look so... happy.

he caught a glimpse of your face as you turned, your smile lighting up the room—god, that smile. it was the same one that used to make his heart race, the one he’d replay in his mind for years after you disappeared. but this time, something was different. you weren’t just any girl in the crowd; you were you, the one person who knew him in ways no one else ever could.

his heart pounded in his chest as your eyes flickered over to him, and for a split second, your gazes locked. there was a flash of something in your eyes—something unmistakable, like recognition mixed with longing—but then, almost instantly, you looked away, breaking the connection as if it had burned you.

beomgyu’s breath caught. he saw it, that hesitation, that tiny crack in the facade. it wasn’t just indifference; it was fear. fear of what? of him? of the past? or maybe—just perhaps—of the feelings you were trying so hard to bury.

you turned to the friend beside you, laughing at something she said, but beomgyu knew. he knew that look, that nervous shift in your posture, the way your fingers tugged at the hem of your dress as if grounding yourself. you were avoiding him—not because you didn’t care, but because you cared too much.

and that realization hit him harder than he expected.

he wanted to walk over, to say something, anything that could close the distance between you, but his legs felt like lead. the years of unresolved tension, the things left unsaid, all weighed down on him, keeping him rooted in place.

“gyu?” soobin’s voice broke through his daze, soft and full of concern. “you okay, man?”

but beomgyu barely heard him. his mind was consumed by the look you had given him, the way you’d turned away, not out of indifference, but out of fear. you were scared—just like him.

and now, for the first time in years, he wasn’t sure whether that made things easier... or infinitely harder.

you knew it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened. after a few polite exchanges with old classmates and empty laughter at jokes you weren’t really listening to, you slipped away from the crowd. outside, the cold gleam of the moonlight bathed the night, offering a quiet escape from the chaos inside.

you leaned against the railing, the cool night air brushing against your skin, making it prickle. the muffled sounds of laughter and conversation from the party felt distant, like they belonged to someone else’s life. out here, everything seemed easier—away from the noise, away from the weight of the past. but then you heard footsteps approaching, and you knew that brief moment of peace was about to end.

you felt his presence before you even saw him. it was the way the air subtly shifted—the familiar, electric tension that always seemed to fill the space between you and him.

and now, here he was, standing just a few feet away, the same intensity in his gaze that always made your heart race. there was no avoiding it this time. this conversation, this closure—it had been hanging in the air for too long, waiting to happen.

beomgyu stopped beside you, his presence unmistakable, even without a word. neither of you spoke for a moment, both too aware of the unfinished business lingering between you. it was inevitable—you knew this conversation was coming the moment you saw him tonight. you just didn’t expect it to feel this hard.

“been a while,” he finally said, his voice quiet, like he didn’t want to disturb the fragile calm of the night.

“yeah,” you replied, eyes still fixed on the skyline ahead. “it has.”

more silence. you could sense him struggling to find the right words, just like you were. it was strange how, after everything, the words seemed harder now than they had ever been.

“i saw you inside,” he started again, hands shoved deep in his pockets. “wasn’t expecting that.”

you let out a small breath, not quite a laugh. “neither was i.”

his gaze flicked over to you, and even though you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, you could feel it—could feel the weight of it, how he was waiting for something. an explanation maybe. or maybe just permission to ask the questions he hadn’t been able to all this time.

“why did you leave?” he finally asked, the question hanging between you, unfinished and unresolved.

your grip tightened on the railing, and you stared hard at the city lights, hoping they’d provide some kind of answer. “i don’t know,” you said, though you both knew that wasn’t the full truth. “i guess… it was too much. everything. you and me, what happened… i couldn’t handle it.”

beomgyu didn’t say anything right away, and you could tell he was processing it, trying to figure out what you really meant. “but you never gave me a chance to fix it,” he said quietly, almost like he was afraid of sounding bitter.

you nodded, biting the inside of your cheek. “i know. i thought… if i left, maybe it would be easier for both of us.”

he let out a low, humorless laugh. “easier? is that what you thought?”

“i don’t know what i thought,” you admitted, finally turning to face him. the way his expression shifted when your eyes met—it was like seeing all the pieces of something broken but still sharp, still able to cut. “i wasn’t ready, gyu. i couldn’t keep up with how fast things were going, and instead of telling you that, i ran.”

he watched you for a moment, his lips pressed together like he was holding back everything he’d wanted to say for years. “and what about now?”

the question was simple, but it carried so much weight. what about now? were things really any different? had time changed anything? you wanted to say something definitive, something that would make sense of the mess you’d left behind, but the truth was, you didn’t know. you hadn’t let yourself think about it for so long.

“i don’t know,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

he let out a long breath, his shoulders sagging just a little. “you know, it wasn’t about me choosing you back then,” he said, his voice more measured now, quieter. “i chose you, but it felt like you didn’t choose me. and i get it, i didn’t know what you were going through. but you didn’t give me a chance to understand.”

his words hit hard because they were true. you hadn’t chosen him, not really. not when it counted.

“i was scared,” you admitted. “of what we had. how much it mattered. i didn’t want to mess it up, so i thought leaving would keep things from getting worse.”

he nodded, a slow, deliberate motion like he was processing the layers of it. “and did it?”

you shook your head. “no.”

the silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable, but it was heavy with everything unsaid. you both stood there, letting the moment stretch between you, the years of distance and unresolved feelings catching up.

“so what now?” he asked, the question open-ended, without any pressure or expectations behind it. he wasn’t asking for a second chance. he wasn’t asking for you to make a decision right here, right now. it was more like he was asking if there was still a way forward, whatever that might look like.

“i don’t know, gyu,” you said honestly, looking down at the space between your feet. “i don’t know what happens next. but i didn’t come here expecting… this. to talk to you. to face all of this again.”

“me neither,” he said softly. “but here we are.”

another pause. you both knew this wasn’t something that could be fixed tonight, maybe not even ever. but there was a calm in the way he was looking at you now, like he wasn’t trying to fix it. he just wanted to understand, to finally have some clarity, even if it was incomplete.

“i didn’t expect seeing you again to still feel like this,” you said quietly, more to yourself than to him.

he smiled then—not a wide smile, not even a particularly happy one, but one that showed a kind of quiet acceptance. “yeah. me too.”

you weren’t sure what to say next, if there was anything left to say. but the air between you felt lighter now, less heavy with the weight of what you had both been carrying for so long.

“maybe we weren’t ready back then,” he said suddenly, breaking the silence. “maybe we needed the time apart. but if i’m being honest, i never stopped thinking about what could’ve been.”

you looked at him, really looked at him this time, and saw the quiet honesty in his expression. “me too,” you admitted.

beomgyu let out a small sigh, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, like he wasn’t used to being this open. “it’s weird, right? how time changes things, but also doesn’t. i thought by now i’d have it all figured out. but here i am, still trying to make sense of it.”

“i guess we’re both still figuring it out,” you said, offering a small smile.

he glanced at you, his expression soft but serious. “whatever happens next… i just want you to know that you didn’t mess anything up. at least, not in the way you think. maybe we didn’t work out back then, but that doesn’t mean you weren’t important to me. you still are.”

the weight of his words settled between you, but it wasn’t suffocating. it felt… freeing, in a way.

“thank you,” you said quietly, not knowing what else to say, but feeling the sincerity of his words sink in.

beomgyu’s gaze lingered on you for a moment longer, then he nodded. “i guess this is where we leave it for now.”

you nodded in return, knowing that this conversation wasn’t about a grand reconciliation or a definitive ending. it was just… what it was. two people who had shared something, acknowledging that they didn’t have all the answers but were willing to let the uncertainty hang between them without needing to force it into something more.

“take care of yourself,” you said softly, the words feeling right even though they were simple.

“you too,” he replied, and for a moment, you could swear there was a flicker of something more in his eyes. not hope exactly, but not closure either.

and as he walked away, disappearing back into the party, you stood there, feeling lighter than you had in years. the future was uncertain, but for the first time, that uncertainty didn’t feel so heavy.

maybe, just maybe, there was room for something new between you both—whatever that might be.

and for now, that was enough.

gyo's note: hey guys! first off, i owe you all an apology for not posting in such a long time. uni has been absolutely hectic, and balancing everything has been a bit overwhelming. i’ve missed being here and sharing my stories with you all, but i needed to focus on my studies for a bit. i hope you understand. to make sure i stay consistent without falling behind in uni, i’ve decided to post twice a month—every tuesday and thursday. this way, i can still share updates and new stories with you all without compromising my schedule too much. i hope this works for everyone!

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delcakoo · 2 years ago

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omg pls idk if u did it but chapstick challenge w beomgyu would be the cutest thing ever ☹️☹️

chapstick challenge w/ beomgyu ♡̩͙ˊˎ!

your wish is my command anonnie :D

“okay,” beomgyu shrugs, throwing his phone on the couch. “anything to do with kissing you has an automatic yes from me.”

you originally thought it’d take a couple tries to convince your boyfriend to do the new, stupid challenge floating around social media, but surprisingly, it only took one puny attempt and undetailed explanation to get him on board.

of course, his reason for participation being that the ‘chapstick challenge’ involved kissing — and the simple fact that it was a challenge, and beomgyu never turned down one of those.

you blink. “oh. i wasn’t expecting a yes that quick.” you stand from the couch, pacing off to the bedroom. “let me go get the chapsticks then, big shot.” he snickers at your nickname, manspreading confidently as you eventually rush back in with a red tie and a packet of flavored lip product hidden behind your back.

once you kneel down and set your phone up on the coffee table, beomgyu takes a seat right next to you while begrudgingly tying the neckpiece over his eyes, lips perked up in determination .

as soon as the fabric is secured around his face, he starts cluelessly swinging his arms around in search of you, struggling to find your figure as your apply a grape flavoured lip balm. “yah, is this a prank? where are you?”

rolling your eyes at his impatience, you cup his cheeks to let him know you hadn’t abandoned him, giggling when he flinches and lets out a surprised yelp. “okay, ready for the first one?” you inquire.

immediately, beomgyu puckers his lips in an exaggerated manner. “i’ve been ready. c’mon, baby.”

deciding to spare some mercy and not tease, you lean in, kissing him softly. beomgyu on the other hand is more than eager to feel you; bringing you closer by your waist to deepen the kiss. at first, you believe it’s part of his strategy to win as he licks your lips innocently — but that all goes down the drain the second he playfully shoves his tongue into your mouth.

you hastily pull away, sending him a displeased glare even if he can’t see it. “beomgyu,” you scold, watching the blind idiot lean forward in an attempt to kiss you again with no avail, “i know what you’re doing.”

“what! i did nothing!” he defends in a honest tone, but you quickly catch on to the miniature, smug smirk on his now wet lips.

“you’re supposed to be guessing flavours, not making out with me!”

he pouts, sitting criss cross again. “but making out’s more fun, don’t you think?”

“gyu, if you don’t want to—“

before you can move to stand up, you’re already being pushed back down by your shoulder. “okay, okay! geez, you’re so strict,” he grumbles jokingly. “i’m gonna try for real this time, seriously.”

you sigh, reaching across the table to apply a new, fresh layer of grape chapstick. “alright then, ready?”

beomgyu nods, sitting in anticipation as you hold his arms still and bring him into another sweet kiss. you don’t move much, letting your boyfriend start his seemingly focused investigation. suddenly, he bends lower to suck your bottom lip for a few seconds, making your brows furrow in confusion.

“hmm.. what could it be..” he mumbles in a serious tone, and yet you swear you see him try to stifle a laugh.

gaining more suspicion by the minute, you raise a brow. “babe, it seriously can’t be that hard. i purposely chose an easy flavor first.”

beomgyu rudely ignores your words, much too busy resuming his hasty attack on your lips with his own. it’s messy and downright aggressive as he takes turns kissing every inch of your upper and bottom lip, tongue mischievously poking out every once in a while. at this point, you doubt there’s any chapstick left on your lips, but you couldn’t deny that all the affection you were receiving was appealing.

you take it all back when you’re abruptly hit with a gentle nip of pain. “ow!” you snap, glaring down at the boy who had just bit your bottom lip. “what the hell was that for?”

snickering, he takes off the makeshift blindfold. “sorry, just felt like it.” realising this whole idea was a total fail, you huff in defeat, watching as beomgyu licks his lips before humming in satisfaction.

you send him an unimpressed frown, “can you at least guess the flavor?”

“grape,” he instantly replies, “i already knew that since the first kiss.”

you pause, jaw dropping as you attempt to process his confession. it was truly a mystery how you ended up dating the biggest dork on planet earth. “gyu, are you kidding me?!”

even if he’s anything but, beomgyu shrugs with innocent eyes before tossing the blindfold over to you. “nope. now put this on, baby. it’s your turn to kiss me, don’t you think?”

clearly, your boyfriend wasn’t here to guess lip balm flavors. you groan, picking up the tie and accepting your defeat, watching beomgyu reach over for the chapstick with his classic, stupid grin on his face.

woops this was longer than i anticipated 😭 still not gonna add my taglist tho jshdj, if u enjoyed reblogs/comments r appreciated!

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createdbytragedy · 5 months ago

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GOODBYE KISS

Pairing: Choi Beomgyu x reader Genre: Fluff, established relationship Warning: None A/N: Just a small drabble after a long break. I actually forget that the millions of scenarios and fanfics ideas in my head aren't gonna write itself. "Its getting late, you should go....." you mumbled to your boyfriend, breaking away from his kiss. "I have 10 minutes more," he stated, capturing your lips once again, his big hands rubbing your back up and down, down and up, soothing you from whatever stressed and doubt you had before. He always did that. Kisses you senseless until you forgot all about the world around you and the only thing you can feel was his presence and his lips dancing with yours. "Don't wanna go tonight~" he whined, pulling out but still holding your chin as he looked at you lovingly. You chuckled," You never wanna go, Gyu" "Don't wanna leave you." he mumbled, wrapping his arms around you to pull you closer as he placed soft little kisses on your cheeks and forehead, making you giggle. His embrace was so warm, so comfortable and so perfect. Like his arms were made to hold you. Like you were made for each other, after all. You almost felt selfish, wanting him to keep him all to yourself. Maybe make him stay tonight. You knew he would if you just say the word but the rational side you of you knew he had to go. There were other people out there who needed him too. And right now, his fans needed him. "Are you gonna miss me while I'm gone?" he asked, looking at you with those golden eyes that always made your heart skip a beat. "Of course, baby. Will miss you every minute and every second. " You answered, smiling at him. He smiled back, content with the assurance. "DO you --" he was cut off by the horn honking from outside your shared apartment several times a row. Beomgyu groaned, hesitantly retracting his arms from your waist. "ARGHHH!! don't wanna go yet..." he pouted. You smiled, standing up and cupping his cheek. "Just 3 to 4 weeks baby. Then I'm all yours again. You can do it for me, right?" He nodded. For you? Yes, he could. "Don't skip meals and drink lots of water. And I'll call you whenever I'm free. I love you a lot, okay?" You smiled, " I know, baby. I love you more." You said, pulling him into a hug that he melts into. His soft chuckle vibrating in your ear. "Gonna marry you one day." he whispered. The horn honked once again. This time, longer and more consistent. You laughed together before making your way to the door. "Goodnight, sweetheart. Have a good sleep tonight, hm." He said, walking out the door. "You too, honey. Let me know when you reached." you smiled as you watched Beomgyu make his way to the black limo standing outside. His head turn every second, smiling and waving at you until he was inside and the limo drove off. You sigh, closing the door and making your way inside the house that felt too empty without the presence of your boyfriend. You turned on the lights of the kitchen, ready to do the dishes you procrastinated to spend more time with him. You were putting on the apron when you heard the front door open. Your heart skipping a beat at the possibility of a robbery, until you heard the familiar footsteps. "Huh? Gyu, did you forget some---" in a second, you were swiped off the ground, the apron falling from your hands as Beomgyu held you, placing a passionate kiss on your lips. It didn't take long for you to respond, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting go of the world once more. His kisses always felt like that. Passionate enough to make you think you were dreaming. He pulled out first, grinning at you with twinkling eyes as he spoke. "I forgot my goodbye kiss."

#txt #fluff #beomgyu #beomgyu x reader #txt fluff #txt x reader #fanfiction #kpop #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu drabble #choi beomgyu x reader #choi beomgyu fluff #choi beomgyu scenarios #txt scenarios

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jjunieworld · 10 months ago

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“i dare you to kiss the prettiest girl in the room” ｡ﾟ･ 💋

pairing: choi beomgyu x fem!reader genre: fluff, bestfriends to lovers, a little bit of angst, drinking/mentions of alcohol, non idol!au, y/n overthinking synopsis: you and your bestfriend beomgyu decide on going to a new year’s eve party so you’re not bored at the start of the new year. the party goers suggest that you all should play truth or dare. one of beomgyu’s friends decides to dare him to kiss the prettiest girl in the room, knowing you have a crush on him. word count: 2.3k┊masterlist a/n: i really wanted to make a fic based off of this scene from the perks of being a wallflower since i recently watched it! i’ve seen so many other people write fics about this and i thought it would be fun to join! the perks of being a wallflower is literally one of my favorite books and movies of all time. enjoy! ♡

another year, same old you. the same you who had a crush on your best friend since you were six years old. the same old you who had to watch him kiss other girls on new year’s eve, girls that would never be you. the same old you that had to bite back your pain and smile at him, telling him how happy you are about his new relationship that will ultimately end up failing. the same old you who will always love him.

beomgyu sat next to you, flipping lazily through channels on the tv. it was new year’s eve and the two of you were sitting in his apartment bored out of your minds. this year you suggested spending the holiday in, together. just the two of you.

secretly you had hoped that with this arrangement you’d be the girl he would kiss this year, but it seemed like he would rather be anywhere else right now than in his place with you. beomgyu’s phone buzzed and he grabbed it from the table. you looked over curiously and saw him typing rapidly with a small smile on his face.

“what is it?” you joked lightly, hoping to not sound displeased. beomgyu raised his eyebrows and glanced at you, letting out a “huh? oh!” the smile started to falter on your face. was he texting some girl?

“it’s taehyun! he’s texting me about the small little get-together he’s having right now for new years. he asked if we’d wanna come over,” beomgyu replied. your heart dropped as he stared at you, awaiting your answer. if you left, your only chance would be ruined. but if you stayed, who knows if it’ll even happen? that you’d finally get a kiss from your best friend beomgyu.

when you didn’t answer right away, you saw his shoulders deflate a bit. “i know you wanted it to be just the two of us, but there’s really nothing to do. i don’t even have any alcohol! and it’s not a huge party, just a small one! we’re gonna know everyone there!” you sighed as you looked back at the tv. it was some random fantasy show rerun episode where the villain was the darkness personified. you’ve seen it a million times before. you looked back to beomgyu and forced a small smile on your face. “okay, let’s go then!”

beomgyu jumped to his feet and cheered, doing a little dance. that brought out a laugh from you. he always knew how to make you laugh. how to lift your spirits and make you feel better. beomgyu was the bestest friend you could ever ask for, and you were glad to have him in your life.

it didn’t take long to get to taehyun’s place. he didn’t live that far away from beomgyu’s apartment. beomgyu was right when he said it wasn’t a large party. you don’t even think the amount of people here could count as a party.

the party goers consisted of you and beomgyu, beomgyu’s four friends, and two girls who you recognized, but didn’t really know. they were already pretty tipsy when you and beomgyu had arrived; ushering you in with wide smiles and pink tinged faces.

you were also friends with beomgyu’s four friends, yeonjun, soobin, taehyun, and hueningkai. they pulled you into hugs as you made your way to taehyun’s living room. drinks were poured for you and beomgyu and you drank them greedily.

you were in the kitchen, pouring yourself another drink when yeonjun walked in. you gave him a soft greeting as you turned to lean on the counter and drink from your cup. “expecting a new year’s kiss from beomgyu this year?” yeonjun asked you as he poured more alcohol into his own cup. you almost choked on your drink.

“wh-what are you talking about?” you stuttered, turning to him. yeonjun leaned against the table next to you and looked out into the living room where everyone else was. they were laughing loudly, sitting around in a circle. “come on, y/n… you and i both know that you’re in love with beomgyu. i mean, it’s so obvious i don’t know how he doesn’t see it.” yeonjun chuckled slightly and took a sip from his red solo cup.

your mind flashed back to the moment you knew you were gonna love beomgyu forever. love him more, deeper, than just platonic friendship love. to the moment you fell for him, and fell hard.

it was fifth grade, and you were having a hard time making friends that weren’t beomgyu. he had encouraged you to go up to some girls at recess you vaguely knew and befriend them. let’s just say that it didn’t go the way he intended.

you had went up to the three girls, a shy smile on your face and your cheeks heated from your growing crush on beomgyu, and began conversing with them about the my littlest pet shop toys they were surrounding. “i like your lps’s! i have a bunch at home that my mom had gotten for me! i can show you some time if you like!” the girl in the middle looked up at you from her crouched position, an eyebrow raised. there was a pink password journal tucked under her arm.

“why would i care about your littlest pet shop toys when i have my own? i own them all, containers of them.” the girl spat, causing her two friends to giggle. “yeah, she probably has the knockoff ones, she looks poor!” the one friend added. the other two laughed at that and the other friend then added, “she probably doesn’t even have some.” she looked at you as she stood to her feet, crossing her arms. “i bet she lied.”

the two girls who were still crouched also stood, looking you up and down. they had collected the spare toys off the concrete and held them in their hands. the girl in the middle scoffed at you, and turned to play somewhere else, her friends following.

you stood there in shock at the exchange. at how mean those girls were for absolutely no reason. you then felt a hand on your shoulder and beomgyu was in front of you. he must’ve saw the whole thing go down. you looked around you anxiously, looking to see if anyone else saw as embarrassment clouded you.

beomgyu cupped your face and made you look back at him. “nobody else saw, just me. don’t worry. those girls were jerks and didn’t deserve your friendship anyways.” beomgyu said softly as he wiped the fallen tears from your cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. “come on, let’s go join the double dutch game.” he grabbed your wrist and pulled you over to where most of the kids outside were.

you knew that no matter what, no matter the situation or the outcome, beomgyu would always be there for you. would always be there by your side, a comforting hand on your shoulder. you knew that he would always wipe away your tears and take your mind off whatever was hurting you. on that playground, the mulch beneath your feet as you ran to the sidewalk for double dutch, is when you had fallen in love with beomgyu.

sighing as you downed the rest of your drink, you turned to yeonjun. “you know he doesn’t see me that way,” you said, trying to hide the sadness from your voice. yeonjun just shrugged a little, pushing off the counter. “you never know…” you raised a questioning eyebrow at his retreating body. what was that supposed to mean?

you followed yeonjun back out to the rest of the group. you sat down in your place on the floor beside beomgyu. he smiled softly at you, nudging your shoulder a little. “we should play truth or dare!” soobin suddenly exclaimed, silencing the conversations that were being had around the circle. there were some ‘ooo’s around the circle. your heart beat a little faster. you had never really liked truth or dare, always picking truth when asked. people would always get mad that you never picked dare, but you didn’t want to do any dares. especially any crazy dares. “we should!” shuhua, one of the girls who you vaguely recognized, said. “yeah! it will be fun!” the other girl, yuqi, added.

“me first! me first!” hueningkai raced out, and then leaned forward onto his crossed legs. he turned to look at yeonjun. “yeonjun, truth or dare?” yeonjun’s answer was immediate, “come on now! look at who you’re talking to!”

“i dare you…” kai trailed off for a moment, “to kiss shuhua.” shuhua laughed as she turned to yeonjun. there were some whoops from your friends and you chuckled at them.

“y/n, i heard you got into that one art school. congratulations!” soobin spoke across the circle at you. you smiled warmly, putting a hand to your chest lightly. “thank you! it really means a lot, soobin. this one over here…” you looked pointedly over to beomgyu, “still hasn’t even congratulated me yet.” a shocked gasp came from taehyun and beomgyu held his hands up in defense. “but it’s okay, i forgive him.”

taehyun laughed and then added, “we’ll be going to the same place. i’m glad i’ll get to see a friendly face, that school is so huge!” yeonjun then loudly cleared his throat. playfully glaring at you all. “you guys are about to miss some super hot gay on gay action!”

the group laughed loudly and focused their attention back on yeonjun and shuhua. he cupped her face and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders as yeonjun pressed his lips to hers. they dramatically made out for a second before pulling away. the group let out a chorus of ews and disgusted faces.

yeonjun laughed. “my turn! hmm, let me think—beomgyu.” his gaze landed heavily on you for a moment before trailing to beomgyu and you cowered slightly. you thought about the question yeonjun would ask him, what truth he’d pull from him. no doubt it was going to be about you being in love with beomgyu in some way. maybe, “how does it feel to have a close friend be in love with you?” or, “are you in love with someone at the moment?”

“dare,” beomgyu immediately replied. yeonjun smiled mischievously. “i dare you to kiss the prettiest girl in the room… on the lips. keyword: girl, because you know i got all you bitches beat!” he said, pointing around the circle at you, shuhua, and yuqi. the three of you let out laughs. yeonjun was right, who wouldn’t want to kiss him?

beomgyu then turned to you, pressing his lips softly to yours. your eyes widened in shock as your hands hung in the air. he pulled away, looking at you shyly, his cheeks a deeper pink than before. there was a small smile on his lips. yeonjun jumped up suddenly, whooping the air as he cheered. “i fucking called it! kai you owe me fifty dollars!” kai’s hand slammed down on his thigh in disappointment, “damn it!” you looked around the circle in shock.

your gaze traveled back to beomgyu’s. he was already staring at you, waiting for you to say something. you can tell he was getting anxious. he really thought you were the prettiest girl in the room? you cupped his face softly and kissed him again. he pulled you closer to him as he kissed you back. you heard clapping from around you and pulled away in slight embarrassment. you definitely would’ve been more embarrassed and a lot less bold had it not been for the alcohol.

“happy new year!” yuqi yelled just as you pulled away, blowing into a party horn and jumping to her feet also. you and beomgyu looked over at the tv that was playing silently behind you. the countdown was at zero and the screen played fireworks and various people kissing under the night sky. your friends stood to their feet, throwing confetti from seemingly nowhere and blowing into horns as they celebrated.

beomgyu held your hands in his, he was pretty drunk, but not enough to not be aware of what he was doing. “y/n… i’ve been in love with you since like, the third grade. never in my wildest dreams did i think you would ever like me back.” he stated softly, you were close enough to hear him though. “beomgyu, i have loved you all this time... why did you never tell me? all this wasted time of us apart that could’ve been spent as us together.” you replied, staring into his eyes. you still couldn’t believe this was actually happening.

he had just shrugged a little. “you’re my best friend, y/nie. i didn’t want to lose you over feelings you may or may not have reciprocated.” beomgyu rubbed a thumb over your cheek, right under your eye. it was something that he did constantly any time you were this close, and it use to drive you crazy. “but now that i know you love me back, we can spend our time together. as a couple?” he smiled sheepishly.

you giggled as you pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “as a couple,” you echoed, smiling warmly up at him as you pressed another kiss to his lips.

taglist: @jjunberry @gothgyuu @spooksh0wbabe @beargyuuzz @kittyhyuka @hueningm1ckey @dani-is-tired

masterlist┊request rules (⋟﹏⋞)* ੈ ˖♡‧˚

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seoulzie · 4 months ago

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summer lovin'

synopsis: a sun-soaked beach day turns unexpectedly tense when a stranger encroaches on the couple's idyllic summer outing

彡 pairing: beomgyu x afab!reader 彡 genre: fluff, suggestive (?) 彡 warnings: explicit content, foul language, unwanted advances, physical intimacy, moaning ???

SEUL SPEAKS! its been awhile... i took a lil vacation so i couldn't write as often ㅠㅠ hope this somehow makes up for it!

the summer sun blazed overhead, casting golden rays over the bustling beach. the sound of waves crashing against the shore mingled with laughter and the distant calls of seagulls. you and beomgyu had decided to spend the day soaking up the sun and enjoying the carefree atmosphere. the beach was crowded, but it only added to the vibrant energy of the day.

the beach was a bustling tapestry of colorful umbrellas, sunbathers, and playful children building sandcastles as you and beomgyu searched for the perfect spot to claim as your own. the rhythmic crash of waves provided a soothing soundtrack to your search.

finally, you stumbled upon a secluded patch of sand, just a stone’s throw from the water’s edge. it was sheltered by a cluster of palm trees, offering dappled shade and a sense of privacy. beomgyu spread out the large, striped beach blanket with a satisfied grin while you set about anchoring the umbrella firmly into the sand.

as soon as the last grain of sand was settled, you couldn’t contain your excitement any longer, with a squeal of delight, you bounced on your toes, your eyes fixed on the shimmering expanse of blue.

"let's go swim!" you said, already taking a step towards the water.

beomgyu grabbed your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. "whoa, hold on there, fishy," he said with a laugh. "don't forget to put on sunscreen. i don't want you to come crying to me because you look like a boiled lobster."

you pouted but couldn't help but laugh at his words. "fine, fine. hand it over."

he pulled out a bottle of sunscreen from the beach bag and handed it to you. you quickly applied it to your arms and legs, eager to get into the water. when you finished, you realized you couldn't reach your back.

"can you help me with my back?" you asked, holding out the bottle to beomgyu.

he smirked, “what do i get in return?" he teased, his eyes glinting with amusement.

you leaned in slightly, "how about i make it worth your while?" you suggested, your voice low and inviting.

a shameless smile crept across his face. the world seemed to slow down for a moment as you locked eyes with him. the promise of something more hung heavy in the air.

but then, as if snapping out of a trance, he chuckled, "alright, alright, you tease," and took the bottle of sunscreen from you

you turned around and pulled your hair to the side, exposing your back to him. the sun warmed your skin, but the anticipation of his touch made it feel like a furnace.

he squeezed a generous amount of sunscreen onto his fingers, and you felt a shiver run through you as the cool liquid touched your heated skin. his hands were soft but firm, the touch sending a delicious chill across your back. the initial sensation of the sunscreen was a stark contrast to the warmth of his fingers, making every stroke feel electric.

beomgyu's fingers moved slowly, almost tauntingly, as he spread the sunscreen across your back. the sensation was a mixture of pleasure and vulnerability. you could feel the warmth of his palms and the gentle pressure of his fingertips as he worked. his touch was deliberate, and as his hands moved lower, a tension began to build between you.

the sensuality of his touch was palpable, each movement infused with a tender yet provocative intent. his fingertips traced intricate patterns over your skin, barely brushing over the sensitive areas, which made you gasp involuntarily.

you closed your eyes, trying to focus on the feel of the sunscreen, but it was difficult to concentrate. every brush of his hands sent a ripple of sensation through your body. you could feel your heart pounding in your chest.

his palms pressed down lightly, spreading the sunscreen with careful, deliberate pressure. it wasn’t just the sensation of the sunscreen but the way his touch seemed to linger just a fraction too long, savoring the contact. as he moved closer to your lower back, you could feel the warmth of his breath mixing with the lingering coolness of the sunscreen, creating a blend of sensations.

with each movement, beomgyu’s fingers seemed to dance closer to your hips, where the skin was more sensitive. he paused there for a moment, his hands hovering tantalizingly close. the tension in the air was thick enough to be cut with a knife, and you could feel your heart racing, pounding heavily against your ribcage. the anticipation was almost unbearable.

finally, as his hands neared the edge of your lower back, you let out a soft moan, unable to stifle the response to his lingering touch. he chuckled, the sound a low, sultry rumble that resonated through his chest and made your skin prickle with awareness. his breath was warm and teasing against your sensitive skin, his touch leaving a trail of heat that lingered long after he’d finished.

"relax," he murmured, his voice low and husky. "i won't bite."

but you knew better. his touch was a bite of its own, a thrilling, intoxicating poison and you were completely under his spell.

as he finished applying the sunscreen, and his hands lingered on your skin for a moment longer before pulling away. you turned to face him, your heart still racing. he was looking at you with a knowing smile, his eyes filled with a desire that matched your own.

as beomgyu finished spreading the sunscreen across your back, his hands lingering just a bit longer than necessary, you turned around to face him, a playful glint in your eye.

“well, if this is your way of convincing me to stay out of the sun, i might just end up needing a second dose,” you teased, your voice dripping with amusement. “you’re dangerously good at this.”

beomgyu’s eyes sparkled with desire. he leaned in closer, his lips almost brushing against yours. “is that so? maybe i should find more excuses to touch you like this,” he murmured, his breath warm and tantalizing against your face.

before he could close the distance, you grinned mischievously and darted away, your laughter ringing out as you made a beeline for the sea. “you’ll have to catch me first!” you called over your shoulder, your voice carrying a hint of challenge.

beomgyu’s expression shifted from surprised to amused as he watched you sprint towards the water. his eyes followed you with a mix of affection and exasperation, clearly entertained by your playful escape. “you’re impossible!” he shouted after you, shaking his head with a grin as he took off in pursuit.

𓏲 𓇼 * ~ !

as the day wore on, you and beomgyu took breaks from swimming to relax on the beach, build sandcastles, and enjoy the snacks you had brought. it was a perfect day, filled with laughter and joy.

eventually, the heat became intense, and you decided to take a break from the water. beomgyu offered to get some food for both of you, suggesting you stay behind and relax under the umbrella.

"i'll be right back," he said, flashing a smile before heading off towards the food stalls.

you settled down on the blanket, enjoying the shade and the gentle breeze coming from the ocean. as you watched the waves, a guy from a nearby group playing beach volleyball noticed you and walked over, a confident smile on his face.

"hey there," he greeted, looking you up and down. "you here alone?"

you shook your head. "no, i'm with my boyfriend. he's just getting us some food."

he raised an eyebrow, clearly not believing you. "boyfriend, huh? well, if he's not around, maybe i can keep you company?"

you shifted uncomfortably, not wanting to be rude but also not interested. "no, thanks. i'm fine."

joon, the guy, persisted, stepping a bit closer. "come on, just a chat. you look like you could use some fun."

the closer he got, the more uncomfortable you felt. you could sense his gaze lingering on you, making your skin crawl. "seriously, i'm not interested," you said more firmly, hoping he'd take the hint.

hyeonu smirked, leaning in. "are you sure about that? you seem a bit lonely."

before you could respond, you saw beomgyu approaching, his expression darkening as he took in the scene. he walked straight up to hyeonu, standing between the two of you.

"is there a problem here?" beomgyu asked, his tone firm and cold.

hyeonu glanced at beomgyu and then went back to you. "just talking to your girl, man. no harm done."

beomgyu's eyes narrowed. "well, she's not interested. so, if you don't mind, fuck off and let us enjoy our day."

hyeonu held up his hands in mock surrender. "alright, alright. didn't mean to cause any trouble." he backed away, rejoining his group.

you turned to beomgyu, feeling a mix of relief and gratitude. "thanks, gyu."

he sighed, obviously still agrivated "who the fuck was he?"

you smiled and reached up to cup his face, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "you don't have to worry. i'm all yours."

the tension left his shoulders. but his grumbling continued. "that guy was such an asshole. like, seriously, who does he think he is? just coming over and—"

you cut him off with another kiss, your lips gentle but firm against his. "gyu, it's okay. he's gone now."

he sighed against your lips, his frustration slowly dissipating. "i just hate seeing guys like that. they have no respect."

"i know," you whispered, kissing him again. "but i'm with you. no one else."

beomgyu's arms wrapped around you, pulling you close. "yeah, you're right. i just... i can't help it sometimes."

you smiled against his lips, feeling his tension melt away with each kiss. "it's okay. now, let's enjoy this food you got."

he grinned and nodded, setting the food down on the blanket. you both sat down and started eating, the earlier tension melting away with each bite.

as the sun began its descent, casting a golden glow over the beach, you and beomgyu walked hand-in-hand along the shore. the sky was a canvas of pink, orange, and purple, streaked with the softest hues of blue. the rhythmic crash of waves against the rocks provided a soothing soundtrack to your peaceful stroll.

you paused to watch the waves, the salty spray misting your skin. the world seemed to slow down as you took in the beauty of the sunset. turning to beomgyu, you found him watching you with a tender expression in his eyes.

"this was the perfect day," you said, your voice soft. the gentle breeze carried your words away, but the look in beomgyu's eyes told you he had heard.

he smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "it was," he agreed, his voice filled with a contentment that mirrored your own. "i'm glad i got to spend it with you."

you leaned in and kissed him softly. the taste of salt and sun was on his lips, and it was intoxicating. as you pulled away, you looked into his eyes. they were filled with a love so deep and profound, it took your breath away.

"me too," you whispered, your heart full.

they walked on in companionable silence for a while, their hands clasped tightly together. the fading light cast long shadows, stretching out across the sand. the air was cool now, carrying the promise of a crisp evening.

"i don't want this day to end," you said, breaking the silence.

beomgyu squeezed your hand. "we don't have to let it," he replied. "we can make more days like this."

a warmth spread through you and this time iit was more than just the lingering warmth of the sun. it was the warmth of love, of shared experiences. you turned to face him, your eyes sparkling with a mixture of happiness and anticipation.

"i like the sound of that," you replied.

as darkness began to envelop the beach, you and beomgyu made your way back to the car. the drive home was quiet, filled with the comfortable silence of two people deeply connected. the memory of the day, from the laughter-filled morning to the intimate sunset, was etched into your mind. and as you drifted off to sleep that night, with beomgyu's arm around you, you knew that this was just the beginning of the story.

⋆˚࿔ taglist! @flowzel , @izzyy-stuff , @tjneeygyvz, @beombeomlovesme, @s0urcherry , @rianrishu, @blossommi ⤷ want to get notified? click here!

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milkbobatyun · 5 months ago

Text

xoxo, hugs and kisses: tomorrow x together

genre: fluff, scenario-based, ot5

summary: you are a simple person. you see a cute trend on tiktok for couples? of course you're going to try it out with your beloved tubatu lover. after all, who are they to say no to you?

word count: 2092

a/n: something slightly different to my usual taehyun-focused fics, this amazing idea came from none other than @yeonjunsfox ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡) it took me a while to put together cus i wanted to post it with all the members together. i tried to make this as accurate as possible to their irl personalities (or at least from my understanding of their personalities) the images i've added are for visual reference and are not mine, credit goes to their original owners.

your inspiration came from your endless scrolling on tiktok one fateful night. it only took 3 videos of watching couples try the trend of the lipstick kiss challenge for you to be tempted into trying it with your own boyfriend and it went a little bit like this:

yeonjun:

it was perfect timing that you asked actually. he had just received a package from dior, requesting that he promote their new series of lipstick shades, so clearly, he was delighted you’d ask.

he would definitely be super cocky about it. once he deemed that there are enough kiss marks on his face, he would begin an entire photoshoot, with you being his dedicated photographer.

under the street lamp, in the park, in the reflection of the nearby convenience store mirror, no matter where, he would be there, striking a pose and showing off the kiss marks.

in fact, when the cashier working the late night shift was greeted by the sight of yeonjun strutting into the store with you in tow and shades of red littering his face, the worker was both confused and concerned. what the hell happened??

seeing the worker’s confused face, yeonjun would grab your wrist, dragging you to the counter, motioning to the kiss marks on his face before pointing out your smudged lipstick.

“yeah, this piece of work, was made by them.” he gleefully announces.

hearing him brag about this to everyone he meets, whether it be some diligently exercising ahjummas, a young couple simply walking their dog, or the stray cat caught up in his mischief, it never failed to make you turn a shade of crimson similar to your lipstick shade, making your face burn and your ears heat up.

if you thought he was bad enough when you were doing the photoshoot, filming that tiktok for the promotional video was something else.

setting up the phone, you put on the perfect shade of red, pretending to accidentally smudge it so yeonjun would wipe it away with his thumb.

he did do that and following the script, leaned in for the kiss, with love and something a little bit more in his eyes.

when the both of you broke away from your kiss, it only took one look in the phone camera for you to confidently say that he smudged your lipstick even more than it was before.

you shot yeonjun a look of disapproval, but all you got in return was a cheeky grin.

you best bet that he would put the photos you took to good use, posting them on his instagram page as a hard launch of you.

soobin:

oh boy was soobin ecstatic that you had asked him to do the challenge with him.

with an excited little cheer, he would get everything ready for you, helping you to amass your collection of lipsticks, even offering to go out and quickly go buy more if you dont have that many lying around.

like yeonjun, soobin would want to take a photoshoot, but much more toned-down and subtle. he would sneak photos while you’re distracted with planting kisses around his face.

soobin’s long body is stretched out on his bed in the dorm, in a leisurely manner, while you’re perched comfortably on his legs while you begin to make your masterpiece

your plans of planting as many kisses as possible is disrupted by your new fixation on his squishy cheeks and cute dimples. even while you’re pinching and kneading his cheeks like a cat would while making biscuits, soobin would be sneaking photos of your hands squishing his cheeks.

you’ll only remember to go back to your duties of blessing his handsome face with kisses when soobin begins pouting and teasingly complaining that his cheeks are red from your pinching. that is a bold-faced lie and we all know that. his face is red from all the love and attention he’s been receiving from you.

the filming process is successful, with little mishap occurring. the video idea originally was already cute enough, but what the tiktok managed to capture was pure gold.

when the camera had panned to soobin, he looked in your direction with a look of pure love and adoration. a look where people could easily tell, you were the center of his universe. MOA familiar with his different smiles could immediately deduce that this smile was different from his usual eye smile, dimple smile. this was a smile of a soobin well and truly in love. with a gentle wipe of his thumb, the smudged lipstick is removed, instead replaced with a soft, loving kiss on your lips.

to MOA’s delight and surprise, a new cover of #monthlysoobin is revealed in his latest monthly update. a subtle and cute post of the silhouette of soobin and you in the process of filming is showcased on soobin’s public instagram account as a soft launch of your relationship.

beomgyu:

you immediately regretted announcing your idea to him at 2 am in the morning, while you were doom scrolling. boy, his gleeful exclamation could probably be heard from the other side of the dorm. in fact, it probably woke up his poor band mates. regardless, their love for him was never-ending, so beomgyu was most likely politely excused the next morning.

hearing your proposal, he would turn to you with the biggest, silliest, love-sick grin, stretching from one side of his face to the other.

he’s more than ready to go zooming around and collecting up all the lipstick you’ve gradually moved into their dorm, though his injury prevented him from such excess exercise. instead, he watches you impatiently as you scurry around, snatching up all the available lipstick you can find that’s lying about.

beomgyu’s almost bouncing off the bed in excitement when you begin setting up. even before you’ve applied the first shade of lipstick, he’s thrust his head forward, eyes shut in anticipation, brushing back his own hair and leaving his forehead on display, ready to be adorned with your beautiful kisses.

the first half of the video goes without any accidents, though when it’s beomgyu’s turn to wipe the lipstick, he decides to become a little mischievous.

the camera captures the exact moment the thought crosses his mind. his eyes light up with a bright, gleeful spark as he cleans your smudged lipstick diligently.

grabbing a nearby lipstick, beomgyu dabs his thumbpad against the lipstick, smudging the pigmented colour of the stick onto his thumb, before his eyes look up at you. with a final cheeky smirk on his face, he smudges the colour onto your forehead.

“simba~” he gleefully announces.

a delighted laugh falls from your lips, amused by your boyfriend’s classic antics. lifting your finger, you smudge the lipstick on his forehead in turn, blessing him also with the “simba”.

when beomgyu posts on his personal instagram next, it’s a cheesy reenactment of the opening scene of lion king.

it was taken after his leg had healed and the two of you were sporting traffic cones on your heads. with the fuzzy orange streetlight in the background and shining as a spotlight, which also doubled as a stand-in for the sun, it was the perfect blend of romantic and chaotic.

taehyun:

he’s so cutie patootie about it. he tries to act all cool and ‘yup, i totally guessed that when you looked at me with that face’ but he cracks under your teasingly unamused face, giving up and doing a happy little cheer and the little hand clap thing, with his eyes scrunched up while his cat-like smile takes over his face.

with such an infectious little smile, your own frown and upset at your plans being thwarted turned itself upside down and you were grinning like the lovesick idiot you were.

next thing you know, your small collection of lipstick shades has mysteriously grown larger overnight and taehyun has no idea how that happened. coincidence? i think not.

when you interrogate taehyun on why there’s so much lipstick when you have enough already and it’s just one. flipping. video. that you’re filming for, he just nonchalantly shrugs and returns your questions with a quick remark.

“firstly, it’s you, so i don’t mind it anyways, secondly that’s what all my money’s for. to spend it on things you need.”

he says all that cheesy and gooey stuff with only a hint of a cheeky grin, his dimple half showing. clearly, he was not sorry.

before you film the video, you smother taehyun with loads of kisses. he tries to pretend that he isn’t enjoying all the attention, but underneath the ‘cool guy’ facade, he was puffed up and arrogantly gleaming at the attention, like a proud peacock.

when you accidentally smudge the lipstick, as according to script, taehyun’s hand appears and he wipes off the smudge with a look of concentration. a pity that the camera didn’t manage to capture his face in that moment, he was looking at your face with the bright spark of awe in his eyes.

unfortunately, when the camera pans to taehyun, he pretends to be cooly looking at his phone, pretending to be unaware of the camera on him, nor of the multitude of kiss marks on his face. a quick side-eye of the phone screen gave him a peek the artwork on his face. try as he might, taehyun can’t help but break into a slight smirk.

afterall, who doesn’t like appreciating the art of their favourite artist, who also happens to be their lover?

to your disappointment, the moment the camera stops recording, taehyun drops his phone on the soft mattress of the bed before locking eyes with you. he looks at you in such a way that reminds you of a cat getting ready to pounce, cute little butt wiggle and all.

without warning, taehyun launching himself from his side of the bed onto you, arms and legs sticking out to the side like a sugar glider, before he playfully pins you to the bed, giving you your fair share of kisses on your face.

later that night on weverse, a sneaky little squirrel posts an image of your cheeks smooshed together, the lipstick on it forming a heart shape.

huening kai:

he’s relatively calm on the outside, in the fact that he doesn’t end up screaming. instead, he turns to you, eyes lit up and a smile spreading across his face, a look of pure delight evident. he was so ready to do a tiktok trend with his favourite person.

you shower him in kisses. every time you land a kiss on his face, you’re greeted with his unmistakable laugh. with huening kai, you wouldn’t even be able to begin filming until he’s certain that there are enough kisses on his face. spoiler: there is never enough kisses on his face.

he would point at places where he thinks you’ve missed a spot, but there’s usually only a pinch of space left. when you deny him a kiss because of the lack of space, he gets all pouty and sad. he knows that his puppy eyes are your biggest weakness and you can’t say no, so that’s exactly what he uses against you.

with a sigh, you give in, smooshing his face in more loving kisses.

when the camera is propped up, everything goes as planned, though huening kai does come in a little bit late for his cue, mostly because he was distracted by the deity of beauty in front of him.

you think you’re done? no. huening pulls out his whole collection of plushies and (cutely) demands that you bestow a kiss on all of them. afterall, you’re technically the parent of his plushies, his children must be getting some love.

when you’re finally done with all of his plushies, he hands you a miniso penguin plushie that he had been keeping hidden under his pile of soft toys that frankly takes up half of his side of the bed.

“i saw it in a miniso shop while we were on tour and it reminded me of you and me. they’re a pair, so they can never be separated.”

on his next weverse post, MOA saw that it was a pair of miniso penguins, one was pink with a bridal veil, while the other was a grey penguin with a smart tophat and bowtie. what made MOA go crazy however, was the fact that both penguins were marked with a slight imprint of some coloured lipstick.

∧,,,∧

( ̳• · • ̳) © curated with love by milkbobayun 2024

/ づ ♡

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beom1e · 4 months ago

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jerk! giving up

between a friend from college coming to visit and the common occurrence of yeonjun putting his relationship before your friendship, the last thing you need is beomgyu waiting to poke his nose where it doesn’t belong. but despite his need to fight with you on everything, his actions show a completely different side of him. a side that cares for you.

pairing choi beomgyu x fem! reader

genre humour, angst, fluff, guitarist! beomgyu

warning cursing, alcohol, hangover, nausea, jealousy

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you fixed your hair in the mirror, trying to find the perfect balance between messy and neat. the door into the bathroom on beomgyu’s side pushed open, and you cursed under your breath as he stepped into the room. you straightened up and looked at him expectantly, waiting for his harsh words or at the very least a complaint. he stayed silent.

his eyes trailed across your figure. you were dressed in a way he’d never seen you dress before, and you were wearing a much more mature style of makeup. you were looking at him through narrowed eyes beneath a sultry smokey-eye, and your lips were painted a seductive red. he swallowed thickly and averted his gaze towards the linoleum floor.

‘why are you staring at me?’ you rolled your eyes and turned back to the mirror to dab at your lipstick.

‘you look ridiculous,’ he lied. ‘where are you going?’

‘a friend of mine from school is coming to visit,’ you explained. ‘we’re going to hit the club and then she’s going to crash here for the night. so, please, knock before you barge in like you just did.’

‘is that really a good idea?’ he raised a brow.

‘what, clubbing?’ you scoffed. ‘okay, grandpa.’

‘drowning your sorrows with alcohol,’ he stated. ‘it’s only your fault that yeonjun made a move on that music store girl. you should have been clear about your feelings.’

‘stay out of it,’ you sighed, looking down at your hands that were gripping firmly onto the sink’s edge. ‘why are you even talking to me? we’re not friends.’

‘and whose fault is that?’ he shot back. you groaned with frustration as you headed back into your bedroom. ‘you’re the one always pushing me away.’

‘huh?’ you spun on your heel to face him. he’d stopped under your doorway. ‘because there was no reason for you to act like such a dick the other day. one second you’re this guy who went to college but loved music more than his degree, the next you’re an insufferable piece of shit who would do anything to piss me off. and you had the audacity to come knocking on my bedroom door as if that’d solve anything.’

‘i’ll leave,’ he rolled his eyes. still, he felt guilt consume him and this sense of doom as he wondered if you’d ever speak to him again. ‘and i’ll use taehyun’s bathroom.’

why did he care? he wanted to rip his hair out of his scalp at the mere thought that he’d grown to care for you.

he was a better person than you knew. he loved those closest to him intensely. he was the best at giving advice and thought of music as a healthy escape. he’d taken great care when editing the songs you’d originally wrote, always turning to the rest of the band for confirmation that it wouldn’t bother you before the music was officially released. yet, somehow, you had this idea in your head that he’d waltzed into the space you left behind and hated you for even existing. that wasn’t the case, you’d just failed to make an initial connection.

still, something had changed.

he could only ever think of you as the girl who showed up out of the blue and claimed that he’d stolen her life. the girl who went out of her way to push him to the limits. but now, you were this girl chasing a life you didn’t want and leaving behind a dream too far out of reach. the girl who lost her hometown, her friends, her music, her childhood sweetheart, and now her second chance at having it all again.

if he could, he would be hitting his head against the wall and praying for the return of the surface-level impression he used to have of you. but he recalled the way you rushed to wipe away your tears and the cracking of your voice. he thought about it a lot. he thought about you a lot. he always had, honestly. despite the jealousy, he’d always wondered about this ray of sunshine his friends had always described. he wanted to meet the genius behind the lyrics. he wanted to make you proud. and then he began to think about you after your first meeting, and where he went wrong. he tried to ignore it and blame it on your childish feud, but no one else thinks so often of a girl they claim to dislike.

he closed your bedroom door with a huff.

you headed towards your bedside table and dug your hand into the bag of gummy worms kai had bought for you the other day. as your teeth pulled back against the gummy treat, your phone began to ring. it was yeonjun. you stared at the screen and waited for his contact photo to disappear. a scanned photograph of your childhood selves sharing an electric guitar at the music store you had once loved so dearly. you really had to get around to changing it, probably to a selfie taken right from his instagram.

the room fell silent after the ringtone stopped. and then your phone began to ring and buzz with text messages from your best friend. you squealed excitedly and jumped up from the bed, knocking the pack of gummy worms to the ground.

taehyun stopped in his tracks as you pulled open your bedroom door. you sent him a smile as you skipped down the hallway and headed for the staircase. as your feet met the final step, you heard her voice as she was escorted into the seating area by soobin. you rushed towards them with another excited squeal, causing soobin to jump and yelp.

‘y/n!’ she called as she ran towards you. your arms wrapped around one another out of instinct, and she began to jump up and down with you in her arms. she leaned in closer and lowered her voice. ‘why didn’t you warn me about how rich they all are? i would have tried harder with my appearance.’

‘oh, please,’ you rolled your eyes and looped your arm through hers. ‘come on, i’ll show you to my room. oh, and i share a bathroom with this really annoying guy but he promised to not use it while you’re here.’

‘really annoying guy?’ she turned her head towards you and raised a brow. ‘you mean beomgyu?’

‘precisely,’ you nodded shortly.

‘yeonjun is calling you again,’ your best friend spoke before continuing to sip from her straw. your gaze cast down towards your phone before you shrugged. ‘what’s up with you two?’

‘literally nothing, as always,’ you sighed. ‘he met this girl and the rest is history. i refuse to entertain him any longer.’

‘you’re giving up on him?’ she raised a brow, shock evident in her expression. for as long as she had known you, yeonjun seemed to be the only guy you’d ever truly wanted.

‘he’s not the only guy in the world,’ you rolled your eyes and picked up your glass. you stirred the icy liquid with your straw as you stared at the base of the glass. ‘i’ve dated other guys and had no issue before. i think i only wanted him because he was like this connection to my childhood, and being here just makes me nostalgic. but i’m not a child anymore. i mean, look around, there’s a hundred guys in here alone.’

‘just don’t do anything stupid,’ she warned as she finished her drink. ‘and don’t go home with any of them. how on earth would i find that awkwardly hidden mansion all on my own?’

you laughed audibly. it felt good to see her again. she was a reminder of the life you had now, after spending too much time in a world you no longer belonged in. the five boys were just a friend group of yours, nothing more. you didn’t live here anymore, you didn’t make music, you weren’t going to fit perfectly back into their lives. you had a career to chase and a group of wonderful people in another city. you had past loves, mistakes, memories, favourite spots, records of your time at college. what did you have here besides a lost dream?

‘should we dance?’ you smiled as you set your glass down.

‘obviously,’ she pulled herself up and threw her bag over her shoulder.

you grabbed the remainder of your things and abandoned the table you had been sitting at for over an hour now. your friend reached for your hand and began to pull you through the centre of the crowd. to her, it was just a bunch of strangers together in one room. to you, it was the people you had sat beside at a desk during your school years, still waiting around in this town for something great to happen to them. hopelessly holding onto the love they have for their hometown, and not the desire to move onto bigger things.

you would have been the same, had you been given the chance. to sit and wait around for your music career to take off, and never receive a full education. your parents wanted more for you. still, you wondered if things would have went your way had you stayed. would you been as successful as beomgyu is now?

the most popular songs of the week played through the speakers, regularly being mixed together in order to create a messy transition. it was exactly what you’d expect from the sole club in your town. you still managed to enjoy yourself.

you weren’t sure how long you’d been there, dancing and singing along to the songs that you actually knew. not that it mattered, you had nowhere to be and nobody waiting on you.

beomgyu could have told you. he’d been watching you for the past hour, refusing any offers to dance as he leaned back in his position on the couch. conversation fell short in front of him, and he’d been working on the same drink for as long as you’d been dancing. something about the way you moved was purely mesmerising. there was yet another side of you that he might’ve missed had he stayed cemented in his opinion of you. as your eyes landed on him, he dropped his gaze to his glass sitting on the table in front of him.

‘unbelievable,’ you sighed, and grabbed your friend’s arm in order to switch places with her. ‘beomgyu is here.’

she made a move to look past you, her eyes landing on him instantaneously. her mouth fell agape as she turned her attention back to you.

‘that’s beomgyu?’ she smirked. ‘he’s hot! why are you wasting your time whining about how annoying he is? have him!’

‘have him?’ you brought up your index finger and pretended to gag. ‘i’d rather have a shark bite off each of my limbs.’

‘god, you’re so dramatic,’ she rolled her eyes. ‘he’s literally cute, successful, and rich. and you share a bathroom with him! he’s literally right in front of you.’

‘okay, and?’ you shook your head. ‘sometimes there’s a door right in front of me, doesn’t mean i should go and bang my head against it. same experience, honestly.’

‘somebody needs another drink,’ she rolled her eyes and stepped away from you.

almost as if you could sense him coming, you spun around with your arms folded and found yourself glaring up at beomgyu. he held his hands up in defence and wordlessly slipped past you.

‘what are you doing here?’ you called out to him, making him pause and turn back to you.

‘i was having fun with my friends,’ he started. ‘but now it seems like i’m about to have my night ruined by you.’

‘that’s rich,’ you clicked your tongue. ‘is sitting there staring me down really your idea of fun?’

‘i wasn’t staring you down,’ he narrowed his eyes. ‘and what do you know about fun? aren’t you here just to forget about your feelings for yeonjun?’

‘shut up,’ you waved him off and followed in the path your friend had taken only minutes ago. ‘it has nothing to do with you. like i said, just stay out of it.’

‘you know what your issue is?’ he followed behind you, a sly smirk on his lips. ‘you bite the bait far too easily.’

‘you know what your issue is?’ you aggressively poked at his chest, taking a step toward him. ‘that little taste of fame gave you some sort of god complex, and now you think you’re above me because you played some guitar and slightly changed my sentence structure. everywhere i go, you’re waiting there ready to knock me down even when i feel like i’m on my last legs. you’re a jerk, beomgyu. a first-class asshole unable to have a little bit of respect for anyone but himself. you’re so far out of touch, and you don’t even realise it.’

‘and what are you?’ he retaliated, feeling his heart ache beneath his ribcage. ‘besides a girl so set on making me miserable? everything is just a competition to you. we wouldn’t even be having this fight if you were able to be in my presence without looking for a place to start. and i’m sorry that you gave up on your dreams to go to university, but you can’t continue to punish me for doing the opposite.’

‘just stay away from me,’

‘gladly,’

how could the day possibly go worse?

after drinking too far past your limits, you would have collapsed if not for beomgyu keeping you upright. he carried your drunken self out of the club and got the three of you into an uber. and then it was up to him to get you up the staircase and down the hall into your bedroom. recalling it all the moment you woke up, you’d thrown your pillow against the wall connected to your shared bathroom out of both anger and humiliation. your best friend groaned and begged you to shut up whilst the headache came on.

you felt as if you might die all the way over to the shower. and on the floor of the shower, because standing made you feel as if you were about to puke. and when you brushed your teeth, the mint flavour was nauseating to say the least.

but none of that mattered when you managed you bring yourself downstairs for something to eat. and there stood yeonjun, the girl from the music store, and the sound of their laughter as they bonded over the simple action of making an omelette. you turned with the intention to retreat, bumping into your friend who forcefully shoved you forward.

‘you hungry?’ yeonjun spoke, leaning back against the counter. ‘’gyu told me what happened.’

‘oh, yippee,’ you rolled your eyes. ‘i’m not hungry.’

‘she is,’ your friend interrupted, nudging you with her elbow. ‘thanks for the offer, yeonjun, but my uber is here.’

‘you’re leaving?’ you turned to face her with hurt in your expression. ‘already?’

‘i’m sorry,’ she wrapped her arms around your shoulders and pulled you into a hug. ‘i’ll text you when i get back.’

‘oh, okay,’ you frowned as she pulled away.

‘it was nice meeting you all,’ she waved as she stepped towards the door out of the room and into the entrance hall. ‘and tell beomgyu thanks from me.’

she left you there, and the energy of the room seemed to drop. you cleared your throat and turned towards the seating area where taehyun was sitting and scrolling on his phone.

‘are you busy today, y/n?’ the girl spoke. you stopped in your tracks, locking eyes with taehyun who seemed to display his concern. ‘me and ‘jun are going out for dinner later. thought you might need a little bit of a pick-me-up.’

it would have rude to decline her invitation, so you went. unwillingly so. just you, her, and yeonjun for the entire day.

she remained attached to him for the entire time. she gripped onto his bicep and bounced as she spoke, a kind smile on her lips. it infuriated you, and knowing that she wasn’t intending to hurt you just infuriated you further. you didn’t want to be so angry with her or yeonjun. but he was your yeonjun, until he suddenly wasn’t. and seeing him fall for somebody else made you feel sick to your stomach.

arriving home was a blessing. if you ignored the fact that she was going to be staying over. in his room, in his bed.

beomgyu knew exactly what to expect. he pushed open your bedroom door and softly closed it behind himself. you hardly had the energy to fight with him, only lifting your gaze momentarily to check who it was coming to disturb your peace. he was fiddling with a pick between his fingers and leaning against your bedroom door. his heart ached once more when you looked up at him with sadness in your gaze.

‘i know you don’t want to see me,’ he shrugged. ‘whether it be because of the argument we had last night, or the fact that i was the one who had to deal with the state you got yourself into. but our rooms are very close, and i can’t just sit there listening to you sob by yourself.’

‘i don’t want to talk about it,’ you sniffled and dropped your legs to lay out in front of you. ‘but thanks for getting me home safe last night.’

‘we don’t have to talk about it,’ he awkwardly chewed the inside of his cheek as you continued to stare up at him.

‘you can sit down,’ you laughed shortly and patted the space beside you on the bed.

beomgyu sunk into the mattress at your side. you watched him as he fiddled with a loose thread on his jeans.

‘can i just clear some things up here?’ he avoided your eyes, but caught sight of your short nod. ‘first of all, i don’t hate you. nor do i intend to hurt you every time we bump into each other. it actually pains me to know that’s how you feel. and i don’t have a god complex, i just started giving you the same energy that you gave me, and i didn’t know how to stop.’

‘so it’s all my fault?’ you rolled your eyes.

‘will you cry again if i say that it is?’ he smiled slightly, trying to lighten the heavy air that surrounded you both.

‘you’re the worst,’ you sniffled once more and began wiping at your tears with the sleeve of your hoodie. ‘but thank you trying to explain, i guess.’

‘i’m sorry,’ he sighed. ‘sometimes i overstep, i know. i was having too much fun getting a reaction out of you. but i can see that you don’t need that right now.’

‘don’t you dare bring up yeonjun again,’ you rolled your eyes, suppressing your smile.

‘is he not the reason behind your current state?’ he pushed.

‘still not talking about it,’ you sighed, and pulled your knees back against your chest once more. ‘i’m sorry for being a bitch to you all of the time, too. i do always seem to bite.’

‘can i ask you a personal question?’ he tilted his head to the side as he looked down at you.

‘go ahead,’ you shrugged.

‘why did you move away?’ he looked over your features to make sure he hadn’t made you uncomfortable. ‘i mean, there’s a university here. i would know, i went to it.’

‘my parents wanted me to be away from the distraction of the band,’ she frowned. ‘they said i wouldn’t do well if i was too busy playing around with my guitar. so they bought a house far from here and took me with them.’

‘that sucks,’ beomgyu nodded to himself as an agreement. ‘do you still play?’

‘no,’ you huffed. ‘my guitar’s currently collecting dust in an unpacked box at my parents’ place. it’s been there since the end of my first year, when i stopped coming here so often.’

‘do you regret it?’

‘getting an education?’

‘giving up on music,’

‘i miss the people i shared that hobby with more than the hobby itself,’ you began to fiddle with the fabric of your pyjama pants. ‘this band used to be my whole world. and yeonjun was the one who told me that going to college was for the best. i was naive to think they’d wait for me to return.’

‘it wasn’t planned,’ he made sure to look into your eyes. ‘me, joining the band. i bumped into yeonjun at the reopening of the music store and we talked about guitars for a while. after a few months of friendship, we started playing together. it was all supposed to be experimental.’

‘oh, how humble,’ you laughed. ‘i like your songs. they have nothing on my own, of course, but…’

‘i actually really loved your original songs,’ he smiled, staring down at his hands. ‘i felt bad changing them, but they all told me you wouldn’t mind if it was for the sake of the band. oh how wrong they were.’

‘you guys made me look like a ghostwriter,’ you rolled your eyes. ‘i don’t even have a mention on your socials.’

‘take it up with kai,’ he held his hands out in defence, shrugging. ‘i don’t even have the passwords.’

the two of you laughed in sync, eyes locked. your laugh faded into an appreciative smile, and beomgyu bit down into his tongue before he could tell you how pretty your smile was.

beomgyu couldn’t think of anything worse to be doing with his spare time. and not because you were directly involved, but because he’d already been sitting for far too long under the fluorescent lights of the changing rooms.

you’d step out, and taehyun would go over to observe. he gave you his honest opinion and the two of you discussed each of the dresses in heavy detail. meanwhile, beomgyu sat scrolling on his phone. occasionally, taehyun would snap at him to pay attention. and then minutes later, he would go straight back to staring aimlessly at the screen in a doom-scroll.

he was halfway to announcing his need to grab a drink due to the hot weather, when you stepped out in this dark blue dress that had him stumbling over his words before he could even speak them. his gaze darted back down to the floor as he cleared his throat, but you didn’t miss the look in his eyes. you felt your cheeks burn as you smoothed down the fabric and turned to face taehyun.

he began his rant of how this dress was the right one, as your attention shifted to the boy staring hard at his phone.

beomgyu looked so attractive in that moment. his legs spread out as an armrest for his forearms, the phone between his hands and his head dipped forward. but not too forward, as his features were still visible. the sleeves of his light grey hoodie had been rolled up, and his brown hair was attractively messy. with the recent events that had occurred, you began to wonder if he found you attractive. he’d stared you down enough times over the past week to suggest it.

and you wondered if you found him attractive in return.

you smiled to yourself as you nodded in agreement with taehyun, deciding that you’d finally found a dress for graduation. whether it had been for beomgyu’s gaze or taehyun gushing about how perfect it was didn’t matter.

sitting back against your headboard, you tossed your phone down onto the bed and dropped your head into the hands. a deep sigh left your lips as images of beomgyu clouded your thoughts.

following the purchase of your dress, the three of you grabbed a soft pretzel and a refreshing soda before walking aimlessly around the mall. at every joke cracked by taehyun, you found yourself holding back a laugh in favour of hearing beomgyu’s deep chuckle. your eyes seemed to block out the third-wheel standing between you, expression curious as you looked over beomgyu’s figure over and over again.

his hair was falling perfectly over his forehead, and his black headphones wrapped around his neck were the ideal contrast to his light hoodie. every time he ran his fingers through his brown hair, you felt yourself growing giddy.

all of a sudden, you were crushing on beomgyu.

maybe it was due to the passionate nature of your relationship, or maybe it was due to the softness in his gaze you only recently had the pleasure of experiencing. whatever it was, your friend had been right in her words. you lived mere metres away from him, your bedrooms connected by a singular bathroom. he played the guitar, sang, and was a talented composer. not to mention he was attractive, and there was no denying it. and his attentions remained solely on you. there was nobody else.

well, nobody other than yeonjun, but that was a hopeless feat.

time had already been wasted. you weren’t sure of the future, and you had wasted the perfect opportunity of beomgyu and his closeness. you groaned as you fell back against your bed.

you buried your face into your pillow and screamed into its material, willing the plaguing thoughts of beomgyu to disappear. but they wouldn’t, and a part of you didn’t want them to. a part of you wanted to steep in the feeling of a fresh crush, smiling to yourself as you thought of his voice and his smile and his hair and the fact that he was only metres away from you at all times.

but then you remembered that you were supposed to hate him. he got on your nerves, he overstepped, he spoke in a way that intended to knock you down a few pegs.

but the look in his eyes as you stepped out in that dress…

you pulled yourself up out of bed, feeling a headache coming on from all of the conflicting thoughts. your hand clutched the side of your head as you pulled open your bedroom door and headed down the corridor. the lights were off downstairs, it being late by now, except for the dimmed lights left on in the kitchen as they always were.

as you pulled open the fridge, you jumped at the sound of someone placing a glass down beside you.

‘sorry,’ beomgyu laughed shortly. ‘i thought you knew i was down here.’

‘evidently not,’ you grabbed a water bottle and closed the fridge softly. ‘what are you doing still up?’

‘i’m always up late,’ he shrugged, leaning back against the counter. ‘my schedule is messed up. the downside of not having a real job. why are you up?’

‘headache,’ you frowned. ‘i’ve got a lot on my mind.’

‘like what?’ he tilted his head in question, feeling bold. maybe it was the outfit you were wearing, being a t-shirt and some bed shorts he struggled to keep his eyes off. ‘your mind’s far too pretty to be full of worries.’

‘are you flirting with me?’ you raised a brow.

‘depends,’ he shrugged nonchalantly. ‘do you want me to flirt with you?’

‘uh…’ you avoided his burning gaze. ‘are you feeling okay? you didn’t hit your head on a cabinet or anything, did you?’

‘is that your way of flirting?’ he narrowed his eyes. ‘at least you think i’m tall.’

‘you’re acting weird,’ your response only received a shrug.

‘am i acting weird or are you oblivious?’

‘oblivious to what?’

‘nevermind,’ he pushed up away from the counter and began to walk away. ‘goodnight, y/n.’

‘you’re leaving?’ you set down the still unopened bottle of water and felt your expression drop with disappointment.

‘yeah, you’re not playing along,’ he sighed. ‘you’re no fun.’

‘i am fun,’ you shot back. ‘you just… caught me off guard.’

‘why?’ he raised a brow. ‘because you didn’t realise there’s other aspects of my personality besides being a jerk.’

‘because i wasn’t expecting you to be so bold,’ you rolled your eyes. ‘but hey, at least you admitted to being a jerk. self-awareness sure is sexy.’

‘oh so you think i’m sexy?’ he teased, leaning his head against the archway.

‘i think you need to go lie down,’ you narrowed your eyes suspiciously.

‘will you lie down with me?’ a smirk broke out across his features.

‘oh, as if,’ you scoffed. ‘i’m going to bed now.’

you stepped past beomgyu, turning your head back to see his gaze was indeed following after you. as you headed for your room, you tried to shake off the thoughts and the conversation you just shared. it was like you were in some sort of alternate reality all of a sudden, one where there hadn’t been weeks of mutual dislike passed between the two of you.

a sigh left your lips as you closed the door behind yourself. the headache remained, perhaps even stronger now.

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sungbeam · 1 year ago

Text

𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞

gamer/streamer!choi beomgyu x f!reader

1.5k words, fluff/comfort, reader has hair long enough for a claw clip, strawberries, est. relationship au, the background info dump in the beginning was for my own entertainment tbh

Choi Beomgyu loved you.

Sometimes he wondered how you could possibly love someone like him—a loser who streamed League half the day away, lived in his pajamas, and dropped out of college to play video games for hundreds of thousands of people online. He barely went out of the house, unless it was to touch grass, but he had managed to snag your attention nonetheless.

He liked to joke that you were in it for his celebrity status. It was made all the more ironic, since you had no idea who he was when he'd first introduced himself to you in the self-checkout aisle of a grocery store, and you'd stared at him like he was high. Beomgyu, humbled to all hell, had stuttered out an apology and bowed about ninety degrees—then asked for your number like a normal person.

Ah, good times.

He'd then somehow mustered up enough swagger to date you for two years and counting. And now, you were moved in and got to hear him yell at a handful of computer monitors for twelve hours a day. (Love was funny, wasn't it?)

But if forever was the sweetest con, then dear god, he hoped he could pull this one off.

It was during one of his streams that he heard the front door slam from his office. He had just finished a round, and when he had heard the door but not your voice, he pushed back from his desk so he could lean back and give you a holler. "Yn! Yn-ie! Babyyyyy!"

He waited a beat.

A frown curled his mouth downward when he didn't hear your reply. Uh oh.

Tongue in cheek, Beomgyu used his feet to bring him back to his computer screen. His eyes flickered with the pace at which his chat flew past. "Hey chat, I need to check up on my girl. I'll be right back. Go get a snack or something."

With that, he dumped his headset onto the desk and raced out of the office.

He flew out into the main living space of the apartment, his eyes scanning the premises for you. With both of your incomes combined, the two of you managed to live comfortably in a nice apartment complex just north of the main city center. You both shared a bedroom and bathroom, while also getting separate, small office spaces. You used yours a lot less than he did his, but it was nice to have one in case.

Instead of your figure, he found your keys and shoes by the door, and a grocery bag on the island counter.

He backpedaled over to the bedroom next, head poking into the darkened room. His voice came out low, "Babe, you here?"

"Yeah," came your small response.

He tracked it to the bathroom, where you were hunched over your sink in the dark, your hair pulled back in a claw clip. Your face was damp like you had just washed it, but he didn't miss the way you were wiping at your eyes. Something sank in his chest, something heavy that made his body slump in dread.

"Sorry, I didn't wanna bother you," you said, forcing stability into your voice, even if it still shook a little.

You reached for your facial towel to hide your melancholy, but Beomgyu liked to think he paid more attention than you were giving him credit for.

He wrapped his arms around your middle from behind, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. "Hey, you're never a bother; you know that," he replied softly. "What's wrong, hm? How can I help?"

Your body shook with a sob as you cried into the towel. Beomgyu's chest clenched at the sound, at the feeling. God, he was right here, and yet, he felt so helpless, so useless. "It's nothing—I… I just… I'm just tired," you managed to say.

You sniffled, avoiding his eyes in the dark mirror as you set the towel aside and began washing your face again.

Beomgyu pursed his lips and sucked in a breath. "Yn-ie, you know I'm not just gonna let you go to sleep this upset, baby."

When you'd patted your face dry again, you were left with reddened, puffy eyes. You turned around to press your face into his warm chest. His arms looped around you like second nature to hold you to him.

Beomgyu gently smoothed a hand over the back of your head, letting the tension from the claw clip loosen the headache no doubt forming in your cranium. He clipped the accessory to his belt loop, quietly trying to calm your muffled cries. "Come on. Let's get some food into your stomach, okay? It'll make you feel better."

He led you out to the kitchen, helping you onto one of the bar stools while he rummaged through the grocery bag you brought home. His chest panged when he imagined you going through the grocery store while holding back tears. Had you cried there, or perhaps it had all come flooding out here?

There were a few things to add to the fridge, but he found a carton of big, red strawberries at the bottom of the bag. He released a breath he didn't realize he had been holding in—you'd managed to get yourself something. Good. He was glad.

Usually in your shared household, you were the one to wash and cut and peel fruit for him. You fed him all the healthy things, kept him a normal functioning human being. You kept him sane.

So Beomgyu took the carton of strawberries out of the bag and transferred them to a colander to be washed. He then carefully sliced the stems off each berry, sliced them into halves, until the colander was empty and the bowl he had on the counter, filled.

He wiped his hands on the towel hanging below the sink, then brought the bowl of glistening red fruit before you.

"For you," he murmured, one warm palm pressed between your shoulder blades, his lips brushing a kiss to your hairline. "I'll be right back."

Beomgyu hurried back to the office to find his viewers waiting.

He braced his arm on the desk, forgoing sitting down in the chair. He swept a lock of his long hair out of his eyes as he skimmed some of the live comments in the chat. A huff of laughter, then a shake of his head. "You guys are so weird. I'm signing off for the night though—no, I don't owe you an explanation... Okay, it's my baby—yeah, yeah, I see you rampaging in the comments, Chenle."

Beomgyu wrinkled his nose playfully. "I'm not a fuckin' simp, you losers. At least I have a partner. Okay, whatever. Later, guys."

He turned off the stream with a tap of his mouse, and then he was back by your side. You seemed to have calmed down a little, but what lacked your sobbing came a sad, startling quiet. Quiet from you wasn't unusual per se, but this one felt empty.

Beomgyu stood behind your stool, one of his arms curling around your middle as he peered over your shoulder at the bowl. You'd eaten a few slices of the fruit while he was gone, but it wasn't as much as he had hoped you would have eaten.

He released a light exhale, reaching for a strawberry slice and popping it into his mouth. He leaned his head against yours. "Wanna snuggle?" He asked you quietly.

A small smile pulled at the corners of your mouth, and he mentally high-fived himself. "Is that a yes?" He gasped with a childlike excitement. "You wanna snuggle with me?"

You nodded, not trusting your voice just yet, but that was okay. He heard you loud and clear.

You turned on the stool so you could wrap your limbs around his body.

Beomgyu cooed softly. "My sweet baby. I'm so sorry you have to feel this way." He kissed your head again, his arms shifting so he could hoist your body up and carry you over to the sofa with him.

He collapsed onto the sofa with a melodramatic grunt, then flopped backward so you were lying on top of his chest. He wondered, with your ear pressed against him, if you could hear just how much your proximity affected him. Even after all this time. If, maybe, you felt even a fraction of what he felt for you (just a fraction would make his heart soar). There was no way you didn't, right?

He wrapped both arms around you with a sigh. "I know you don't want to talk about it," he murmured, "just know it'll be alright. All of it. Even if it seems like the world is falling apart, even if you feel like a failure—you will get through this. I know you can; I know you will."

Your first words since earlier to him came at almost an inaudible volume. "And if I can't? What then?"

"Then I'll be here to help you," he answered. Yes, that was it. His breath was warm against your cheek, against your ear. "I'll always be here."

txt m.list

permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @honeyhuii @y3jiishot @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @rnjfy @jaehunnyy @kpopjackie @spiderrenjunfics @soobin-chois @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l @mingiholic @ja4hyvn @vatterie @yogurteume @hyunjaespresent-deobi @justanotherkpopstanlol @w3bqrl @super-btstrash-posts @hibernatinghamster @otchae @bigballsz @shakalakaboomboo @ashxxkook @kpop718 @ethereal-engene @soonyoungblr @wtfhyuck @kflixnet

#kflixnet #txt x reader #choi beomgyu x reader #beomgyu x reader #txt drabble #txt oneshot #txt fluff #txt imagines #txt scenarios #beomgyu drabbles #choi beomgyu drabble #choi beomgyu fluff #choi beomgyu imagines #beomgyu oneshot #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu imagines

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nicngyu · 5 months ago

Text

smau ; right place, wrong person.

one. this is awkward

pairing ; idol!beomgyu x gn!reader

summary ; in which a failed proposal at a txt send-off leads y/n to beomgyu, who can’t help but meddle a little bit.

written ; 1.06k words

author's note ; finally starting the actual story! i hope everything's well explained T_T

⤺previous ; masterlist ; next⤻

This was Y/N's most promising idea ever. What could be more romantic than asking your situationship to be your girlfriend at her favourite artist's meet and greet?

Though, maybe the ring was a bit excessive...

No. It was perfect. Yun liked things like this. When Yun and Y/n had watched countless proposals at BTS concerts, she said it was romantic. When they joked about this exact situation, Yun said it was beautiful: something she could only dream of.

So, of course, this was the best idea Y/n could ever come up with when it came to asking her out. A stroke of genius. The situation was perfect, especially after the conversations they had regarding their feelings for each other just a few days prior.

It was the best way for their relationship to progress from the ambiguity that covered it through their dates and the countless time they had spent together. They knew Yun would say yes because they had spoken about getting together just a few days prior. It was guaranteed.

Y/n's hands ghosted over the ring in their pocket, anxious. Countless TXT fans gathered around them, presenting the artists with gifts and words they had prepared, full of excitement at the idea of finally meeting peopole they admired. Everyone was feeling a similar nervousness to Y/n, though for different reasons. Meeting someone you admire was a huge event, but asking someone you think you might be in love with to finally advance your relationship had its dramaticism, too. Publicly, nonetheless.

This could easily become a train wreck, and doubts swarmed Y/n's thoughts. But it was overshadowed by the certainty that Yun felt the same way. She was too nervous to ask, and was waiting for Y/n to do it first. The plan was sure to work out nicely.

But why was it that when Y/n offered the ring with a hopeful glint in their eyes and uttered the question, Yun stared at them, unmoving? Her expression had dropped, and she didn't accept it in a heartbeat like she had said she would. Instead, she seemed to be in a state of shock, her eyes wide and her mouth slightly open, unmoving. Maybe she was just so shocked she couldn't move. Maybe she was planning the perfect response. Maybe-

In the blink of an eye, she moved. This was definitely different from what Y/n had envisioned. She wasn't saying yes with a huge grin on her face. She wasn't kissing them, hugging them, nothing.

Okay, so it wasn't a good idea. At all. This proved to be especially true when the ring was ripped from Y/n's fingertips and she was gone.

If this were a cartoon, her outline would be seen flashing next to Y/n, where her figure had been a few seconds prior. Y/n was convinced they had never seen Yun move that fast. Stunned, they were forced to watch helplessly, their heart sinking further with each passing second.

Because there she was, in front of Yeonjun, with the ring y/n had bought. This was definitely the last outcome Y/n could have predicted.

A giggle. That flirty smile she had sent Y/N so many times. Not aimed at themself this time. It was all aimed at Choi Yeonjun, who was smiling, too.

People were starting to stare, to whisper. This is awkward.

Choi Yeonjun just stole my girlfriend.

In a poor attempt to recover, Y/n muttered, "will you be my girlfriend, instead?" with their eyes still trained on Yun's back as she conversed with the idol. They turned to observe whatever fangirl stood next to them, hoping they'd joke about it or at least refrain from embarrassing them further.

It was a matter of timing, really. Because it wasn't a fan girl. Or a fan. At all. That was probably the furthest from an accurate description they could have given.

An amused smile played on his face, and strands of his brunette hair fell before his eyesight, eyes twinkling with a hint of mischief.

"I'm not sure i fit that role, but I'll see what i can do," he muttered with a bashful smile.

Huh.

The man in front of them looked strangely similar to Beomgyu. Choi Beomgyu. TXT member Beomgyu. What an uncanny resemblance. And his voice sounded the same. The exact same. Y/n's heart opted to stop beating as they processed the striking resemblance, their mind struggling to keep up with this unexpected twist in their heart. This must have been a joke.

Thoughts began to rush back into Y/n's head. Y/n had to resist the urge to scream. What was happening right now?

Their eyes quickly darted around the room finding the TXT members interacting with fans. 1,2,3,4...there was 5, wasn't there? Then they turned back. His smile wasn't gone. It may have grown wider as he watched the realisation doom upon them. It took a lot of self-control to hold back his amused laughter.

Yes, there were 5 members in TXT, and there was one missing from the crowd. Because he was the one missing. He, Beomgyu, who was standing before them.

The whispers grew louder around them and their hands shook. What was going on right now? And he said....what-?

He pulled out a piece of paper reserved for unlucky fans without a photocard to sign from his pocket, his hands working quickly. He hadn't needed to use them throughout the event, but it seemed this fan definitely needed one.

Y/n's wide eyes barely registered this action before this piece of paper was placed in their hand, a scribble and a signature gracing its surface. He was an idol, after all, and he knew he couldn't spend too much time with one fan. Though, he also should have known better to not hand his phone number to any random person getting rejected at a send-off, either.

But something told him this was different.

The truth was, he had seen them around the HYBE building before. This was enough for him to conclude his decision wasn't one that would bring dire consequences. Only small ones. And be it for forming a new friendship or causing a little havoc, he was willing to face those.

He moved on and began to interact with others, hoping he was able to distract the Y/n from their embarrassment. Y/n's senses were scrambled with a whirlwind of emotions as they held the signed paper, eyes blinking as if to process the events.

taglist ; @serenityism00 @choppedballoondetective @starchasing-cryptid @lun4kazumii @xoxobela @calx-bdo open! send an ask or comment to be added :)

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hannie-dul-set · 1 year ago

Text

모기 / MOGI — [c.bg].

SYNOPSIS. in which all of your life, you and beomgyu have been stuck together like glue whether you liked it or not. and as much as you want to change that, life seems to have different plans.

PAIRING. choi beomgyu x female! reader. GENRE. childhood friends to not quite friends (derogatory) to not quite friends (endearment), romance, humor, very light-barely there angst, pining idiots, college! au with flashes to high school, featuring an ensemble of 01z idols. WARNINGS. swearing, many many (fake) death threats, so much secondhand embarrassment, mentions of sex, mentions of blood and gore, the worldly problems of a teenager, mc has anger issues, gossip. WORD COUNT. 14k.

TAGLIST. @matcha-binz @bgomtori @lotties-posts @bearbeom @bbinwrld @beomies-world @baekberrie @20-cms @jenodreamer

NOTE. it is here! alternatively titled: all the reasons you don't like choi beomgyu (but maybe you do). this is just a v quick v fun read (i hope HAHHAHA). parts in past tense and within parenthesis are set in the past! hope you enjoy mosquito gyu and please let me know what you think! begging for crumbs of feedback plspls.

YOU DON’T LIKE CHOI BEOMGYU. He’s been a thorn in your side for as long as you can remember— a far too nimble mosquito for you to catch and swat away, constantly buzzing around your ears like a mild annoyance. Mild, but annoying all the same.

The problem is, you can’t get rid of him. Not when both your families have been friends before either of you were even born. Not when you’ve been half-living in his house for the better part of your life and he’s been half-living in yours. Not when you’ve always been magically assigned to the same class for twelve god damned years and somehow, you’re now even set out to go to the same university.

It’s like the world just wants to stick the both of you together.

“Hey, fuckface.”

“What do you want, dipshit?”

Unfortunately for the world, you don’t want the same thing.

“Remember when I hauled your ass to the emergency room after you broke your leg at the skatepark in 9th grade?”

Beomgyu lets out a grunt upon hearing your question at the same time as he drops down to the ground with a thunk on the playground seesaw. “Right. That happened.” It’s late at night, the streetlights are dimming, and it’s a week before high school graduation. Not the most appropriate time to be playing around the kid-sized rides tucked in the corner of your apartment complex, but things have been penting up, and there currently seems to be no better way to deal with your physical and emotional exhaustion than by being sprung up to the air, down, and back up again.

“You also said— whoa!” You glue your feet firmly to the chalky ground before dangling your legs up once more. “You also said you’d do anything I ask after saving your ass. I’m here to collect your debt.”

The next instance, you aren’t see’d or saw’d back up. Beomgyu stays grounded, looking at with an expression you can only describe as oozing of suspicion. It is weird, you have to admit, bringing up a spur of a moment promise he made three years ago, possibly under the influence of anesthetics. You’d be suspicious of yourself, too. “Alright,” he relents after a long moment of thought. Beomgyu leans forward, resting his arms over the seesaw handle and burying his chin into his sleeves. “Spit it out. What do you want? I’ll buy it for you.”

You press your lips together. “It’s not something you can buy.”

Now, that definitely doesn’t help your case. Your crypticness is causing his brows to furrow, and Beomgyu is deep in thought wondering what the hell kind of favor your fucked up head is thinking of (especially after the shrimp incident). You can save him from misery and just spit it out right then and there, but it’s not easy for you to pull out of your mouth either. Once this night is over, your throat will be littered with sores and cuts and it’ll all be self inflicted.

“Wait.” Beomgyu suddenly jolts up and sits straight, causing the seesaw to wobble a little. His ears are peeking out the mess of his hair. It’s already way past the school policy length— a privilege of a graduating student, he says. And despite the shadowed sky cloaking the playground lot, you can clearly see the tinge of red painting the thin skin. What is he thinking? you narrow your eyes at him. The blush has spread all over his neck. "You—you—you’re not trying to ask—”

“Beomgyu,” you cut him off, sparing him from an aneurysm. “We’re starting college next month, right?”

His expression tells you he’s completely missed the mark. “Yeah...?” he sounds out, confusion riddled in his tongue. You bite down yours— an early repentance before finally throwing it out in the air.

“Can you do me a favor?” you squeak out. “Can you pretend like you don’t know me?”

Quiet washes over. You preemptively wince, expecting the impending torrent of swear words from your friend, but he doesn’t say anything. He says nothing for a long while, filling the quiet with tension-filled agony before finally saying, “I don’t understand.”

You swallow down a lump in your throat.

“What are you saying?”

There are uneasy creaks on the hinges of the seesaw set, as if it’s unsure whether to go up or down. The scent of iron seeps into your palms with how tightly you’re holding the handle. “Please pretend like we aren’t friends when we enter university,” you inhale sharply. “Better yet, act like you don’t know me at all, okay? Treat me like I was a ghost and I’ll do the same with you.”

You don’t have the guts to look Beomgyu in the eye. You train your eyes to the graveled ground and hold in your breath, listening as the creaks of the rusty hinges slowly come to a still. He’s not saying anything. He isn’t saying anything and you’re starting to grow scared.

The seesaw finally stops rocking, and you finally hear Beomgyu’s response—

“Fine.”

—all while your ass gets dropped to the ground with an even louder thunk when Beomgyu gets off the damned thing. You let out a yelp as your body gets jerked back by the sudden recoil.

“Hey!” you yell out, stumbling to get off the seesaw in a panic because he’s starting to walk. “Choi Beomgyu— wait up!”

“What?” he snaps his head back, and you flinch. He doesn’t look great. He doesn’t look happy at all. Guilt overhauls your entire being with a single, ringing punch and your tongue is weighed down by sand and soot and it’s difficult to swallow without the threat of choking. “I thought you wanted me to pretend like I don’t know you?”

You frown. “I did, but I didn’t mean it to be—”

Words fail when he turns his back to you once again. You can’t say anything. You can’t bring it in you to justify yourself. You can’t even find the shame to call him back. So all you can do is watch as Beomgyu slowly disappears into the evening, leaving behind more things in the playground than just you.

It’s fine, you inhale sharply. You can give him some space tonight and just talk it out on the way to school tomorrow. And it’s not like you didn’t expect him to be mad at you. It just hurt a lot more than you thought it would.

“I’ll see you tomorrow!” you yell at his disappearing figure.

It stings, sure. But still. It’s something you feel like you need to do, because you don’t like Choi Beomgyu, and all the things he’s cost you.

#1: YOU DON’T LIKE HIM FOR WASTING SO MUCH OF YOUR TIME. You’re pretty sure at least three years of your lifespan has wilted away into nothingness because of how long it takes for him to answer the door. It takes two rounds of incessant knocking and a yell of his name. Even then, his mom is more likely to answer than the fucker himself.

He’s been like that ever since. Though you can’t exactly pinpoint when that ever since begins— you can’t remember how you met him because his stupid face has always been present in all of your earliest memories.

(Knock, knock, knock!

“Choi Beomgyu!”

Knock, knock, knock!

“Open the door!”

Classes ended early today, and your teachers at the academy are having a seminar so you don’t have to go there today. This was a rare opportunity in your life as a middle schooler— where every day runs from waking up, to eating, to studying, to eating, to studying again, studying some more, and wanting to quit studying. Today you had free time, and you’re going to spend it wisely.

At least that was the plan. But then Beomgyu called your landline while you were watching TV, saying that he had “something super, duper, insanely cool to show you and you’ll regret it if you don’t come over.”

It’s probably something lame.

You hurried over to the unit right across yours.

But like usual, it took a good five minutes until you heard Beomgyu’s hurried footsteps padding louder and closer and closer. He didn’t give you an opportunity to be annoyed by him— he quickly tugged you into his home and shut the door lock with a kick, running into and out of the living room like it was a racing track, and before you knew it, you were in his room and he was all giddy and excited and it served as a sign that he was up to no good.

“You’re being suspicious,” you leered at him as he dug through his school bag, already taking the liberty to plop down on his bed. “What’s that?”

There was a proud grin on his face when he pulled it out and showed it off to you. You weren’t as impressed. In fact, you were terrified.

Specifically because of the 18+ label on the CD container he’s holding.

“Why do you have that?!” you screeched. “Holy crap. You idiot. Are you trying to get us into trouble?!”

“We won’t get in trouble as long as you stop freaking out like a little wuss,” he reasoned, already slotting the forbidden CD into his conveniently placed laptop right at the foot of the bed.

Your houses shared an internet line, and most websites have been blocked as per both your parents’ request so it “doesn’t get in the way of your studying,” they say. You thought it was crap. Beomgyu thought it was crap. So you’d been trying to find ways to subvert that restriction by whatever means you can get your hands on (i.e. going to PC rooms and getting dragged back home by your parents).

But that didn’t mean you were fine with watching a movie you legally weren’t allowed to watch.

This was absurd.

“Yeonjun hyung lent it to me. Hey, stop overreacting. You said you wanted to watch this and wouldn’t quit whining about it the past two weeks. I’m doing you a favor!”

“We’re not allowed to watch this! If our parents find out, they’re gonna—” You made the mistake of letting your eyes wander to the laptop screen. It’s all blood and guts and gore from the very beginning. You were taken. “Whoa. Move over.”

Beomgyu was grinning at his success. The equally bloody CD container found itself tucked underneath his bed, and before you knew it you were both hiding under the blankets, sharing a pair of earphones because there’s too much screaming and squelching from the off-brand slasher film your friend smuggled from a sketchy high schooler. Maybe that was just the right amount of screaming. You wouldn’t know. You’ve never watched anything like this before.)

To be frank, you don’t remember much about the film. You do remember nearly pissing yourself in fear and screaming along to the cries of agony whenever someone was killed on screen. Beomgyu was unfazed though— that freak. How was he not pissing himself when a severed limb flew into the frame?

But he wasn’t as calm when his brother came home early, and your constant screams of terror elicited understandable concern. (“Shut up! You’re going to get us caught,” he hissed, trying to smack his palm over your mouth but you’re already burying your face into his comforter and blindly shoving him off).

Long story short, you both got caught and got grounded for a week.

So much for having free time.

“Congrats on finishing your last exam!”

You grunt, shoving past Heeseung as you exit the classroom, a stack of scratch papers pressed to your chest. He trails behind you with an evident bounce in his step. You’d be just as excited had you not been brutally murdered by midterms week. It’s only your third month of university and you’re already ready to drop out. Why is this normalized? This is structural, systemic violence.

“Jieun and the rest are planning a night out tomorrow,” he mentions. “You coming?”

“No. I’m going to sleep for forty-eight hours and die.”

He tells you you’re no fun and you flip him off. Three months have passed and you feel like you’ve aged thirty years, but Heeseung is still fucking energetic and you’re sure it’s because the girl from computer science he’d been flirting with for the past two weeks finally agreed to go on a date with him. The stupid grin on his face as he’s typing on his phone is annoying you to no end. “What?” he asks, looking up from his phone, still all smiley and irksome.

“You’re insufferable,” you deadpan. His expression morphs into confusion, then realization, then pity, then circles back into being incredibly annoying again.

“If you beg, I can set you up with one of my friends.”

“Eat ass.”

You smack the top of his head with the stack of papers. He is unfazed. “I know a few guys! C’mon! Instead of being bitter, why don’t I help you out? I don’t do this for everyone, you know. I’m only offering because you’re my friend.”

Well, the past three months haven’t been entirely bad. Your freshman batch was fairly easy to get along with— Heeseung specifically, whom you hit off with during the orientation. You’ve also been doing pretty well with all of your classes despite the back-breaking workload. And now that midterms are over, your uni has this policy to cancel classes for a whole week after every major exam (for the students’ “mental health” they say), so now you have the chance to finally fucking rest.

“Beomgyu!”

You flinch upon hearing Heeseung yell out his name. You can’t get used to it.

The space next to you becomes empty as Heeseung excuses himself for a moment to join Beomgyu and the little group he’s appeared with. You take the opportunity to shove the scratch papers you have into your bag, taking a few glimpses here and there— regretting doing that when Beomgyu happens to meet your gaze at one point, and you quickly avert your eyes to the posters on bulletin boards stuck on the hallway wall. E-Sports Fest 2023. Sign up for your respective departments now!

“Later,” Heeseung waves them off and runs back to you. “Hey. We’re fucked. Beomgyu’s playing in like half of the games next, next week. The ICT fuckers have practically won already. This is too much of a skill gap. This isn’t fair.”

You give him a look. “Okay?”

Heeseung pouts. “At least pretend like you’re interested. Jeongin said yes, but I still have to get Chenle onboard so we can at least get second place, but he says he doesn’t wanna waste our short break so— hey, are you listening?”

No, you’re not. Because you met eyes with Choi Beomgyu once more before he left with his friends, and even if it’s been three months since you’ve last talked to him, there’s still a weird feeling in your gut every time you happen to cross paths.

It’s been easy for him to keep his promise. The both of you have different majors, and though you two share a few mutual friends, Heeseung doesn’t know shit about your history, and nobody seems to suspect anything.

Still. You can’t completely avoid him. Not when you two are literally still neighbors.

The both of you moved out since your campus is a two hour commute from your homes, but you also moved into the same apartment building in the city as per your parents’ request. (“Now, I’m more at ease knowing you’re still living next to her, Beomgyu,” your mother remarked the day his dad drove you both to your new building). Your mom didn’t know how not at ease you are with him still floating around you with a seeming permanence, especially after what happened in the playground that night.

“Anyway, I have to go,” Heeseung tells you, probably off to meet the compsci girl he refuses to tell you the name and identity of. You fear she may be one of your friends. “How about you?”

“Off to have lunch with Sungchan and Minjeong,” you hum. “Have fun. Don’t come crying to me when you eventually get your heart broken.”

“You’re just bitter. Don’t worry. I’ll get you a date to save you from your misery.”

“Go to hell.”

“See you.”

The both of you part ways, and you meet up with the aforementioned two at the campus cafeteria because fast food is outside of your budget after splurging all your allowance on caffeine and energy drinks this week. Your two friends seem to have also been hard fucked by midterms. Lunch was filled with quiet complaints and you immediately took the first bus home after eating.

“You stopped by?” you speak into your phone, wedging the device between your cheek and shoulder as you punch in the code to your unit’s door. “You should’ve told me. I could’ve come home earlier.”

“It’s alright. I just left you some side dishes for the week. They’re in the fridge. Who knows what kind of junk you’re putting into your body without me on the watch.”

“I am eating perfectly well!” you exclaim, shutting your door with a click. You love your mom and her food but she’s as protective as ever. “I just got home. I’ll send photo evidence of me enjoying your kimchi, madam.”

You hear her laugh a little at the end of the line, and you hum out a smile. “I’m hanging up. You must be tired so get some rest.”

“Yeah, alright.” Upon entering the living room, you can see the familiar, reusable blue shopping bag on the open kitchen counter, its unreasonably gigantic size taking up too much of the space. You narrow your eyes and walk towards it. When you take a peek inside, there are still full containers and tupperwares. The rolled omelets look particularly good. “I thought you put them in the fridge,” you say. Without waiting for your mother’s response, you’ve already produced a pair of chopsticks and have pried a box open, stuffing a roll inside your mouth.

“Oh, those are for Beomgyu.”

The eggs suddenly taste like sand.

“He mentioned on call last time that he was missing some of my home cooked dishes. Why haven’t you been sharing with him? Greedy child. Anyway, drop them off at his place later when he gets back. He wasn’t around when I visited earlier. Okay?”

First of all, why does your mother keep calling Choi Beomgyu behind your back? Second of all, the guilt of eating what is supposed to be Beomgyu’s food shot your appetite back down into oblivion, so you quickly close the container and stuff it back into the bag in a zip. “Okay. I’ll do that.” You throw the chopsticks into the sink. He isn’t gonna notice that one omelet is missing, right?” “Bye.”

“Come back home during your break.”

Then again. Why do you have to waste this perfectly good food on a guy like him?

The line ends. You fall to the floor with an anguished cry. “Ugh,” you groan, forehead hitting the counter body a few too many times that a bruise could form. “The bastard might snitch on me if I don’t do it. Fuck. Fine.”

You feel like a reanimated corpse when you force yourself back on your feet, a series of grunts as you begrudgingly lug the large bag of side dishes that won’t even end up in your stomach. This is fine, you exhale. You can do this. You’re gonna knock on the door, throw the bag to his face, and say goodbye without talking. This is fine. This is easy.

But with Beomgyu, it’s never easy. The simplicity of the act ends after you’ve left your unit. What came after was the short, dreadful walk across the hallway because shit— in the past three months you’ve moved here, you have never actually gone up to his door.

Knock, knock, knock.

No answer.

Knock, knock, knock.

Still no answer. This bastard never fucking grows.

“Choi Beomgyu!” Your light knocks quickly transition to a heavy banging. “Choi Beomgyu, open up—”

There’s a click and a creak. Your knuckles don’t land on the familiar hardwood— they land on his chest because the momentum made you keep knocking even after he’d opened the door. “Oh,” he flatly starts. A brow raised and arms crossed, he leans against the door frame and looks at you like you’re an unwelcome guest. “What do we have here?”

He’s insufferable. He’s totally insufferable.

“Who are you again?”

“Cut the crap, Beomgyu,” you grunt, absolutely not in the mood for this. You know that it’s a pretty shitty thing for you to ask him to pretend to be strangers. You really do, so you didn’t hold it against him for being mad at you at first. He’s been doing his end, sure, but you don’t remember him acting like a big fucking bitch to you in private as a part of the deal.

You thought his anger would subside after three days. It’s been three months and at this point you’re convinced that this relationship is now irreparable, and neither of you are making the effort to resuscitate it. “You’re the one who came to my door. Why are you swearing at me?” he huffs. You grit your teeth, shoving the bag to him and his act of arrogance falters from surprise. You don’t miss how his eyes widen and how his scrunched up brows suddenly disappear under the messy bangs he’s decided to grow out.

“Here. I’ll take back the containers next week. Make sure you’ve washed them by then. Goodbye.”

That, in fact, wasn’t a good bye because you stomp back into your unit without giving him a second look.

Dammit, dammit, dammit it all. The door is cold against your back when you retreat inside. You hate him. You really do. This would’ve been easier if your lives weren’t so irrevocably tangled— messed up in all sorts of knots and ties that even a fucking boyscout can’t tear it apart.

You left your phone on the counter when you left and you can see it buzzing and lighting up. There’s a few messages. Hi, dear. How have you been? It’s from his mother. There is no escape to this. Absolutely none.

#2: YOU DON’T LIKE HIM FOR FORCING YOU TO SWALLOW SO MUCH OF YOUR PRIDE. Somehow, he’s always there at the lowest points of your life— moments where you wouldn’t even want any of your family to see you, but he’s there. He always is, and you’d always wish to evaporate along with the rain.

Maybe he has a signal whenever you’re on the verge of doing something stupid. Or losing face. Or being absolutely dumped. Or all of the above at the same time. Maybe he’s there on purpose so he can have one more thing on his belt of things to hold against you.

(“I like you.”

The words squeezed out of your throat like a choke, more than anything. Maybe it was because of the fact that you sounded so pathetic that Jiwoong couldn’t even reject you properly. Maybe if he were to be frank, he was afraid that you’d end up crying.

“Um, there’s...there’s somewhere I have to be for a moment. You don’t mind waiting for a bit, right?”

But it wasn’t you that ended up in tears. It was the sky. You weren’t sure how long you’d been waiting, frozen still in an abandoned corner behind the school where your pink-stained note had asked him to come— him, your desk partner for the semester that you’d been unfortunately struck by— but it was long enough for the afternoon sky to be inked by gray clouds. Long enough for it to start pouring in on your behalf.

You sniffled. Ah, shit. This is stupid. You said you weren’t going to cry but fuck, your eyes suddenly started to sting, and you’re looking up at the clouds because gravity might help in preventing them from falling, but all it did was pool saltwater in your tearducts and now they’ve overflown, mixing into the raindrops cascading down your face.

“Until when are you going to keep standing there like an idiot?”

Instead of the gray, pouring sky, your vision is cloaked by a jarring electric blue. It was the same obnoxious color as the umbrella Beomgyu brings around. Then again— that was just his voice, too. Your cheeks started burning. That was enough to bring you back to your senses. “Did—did you see—”

“Let’s go home.”

It was one thing to be caught crying by your friend-slash-neighbor-slash-annoyance. It was another thing to be caught getting rejected by him. That was double the shame and embarrassment soiled. But Beomgyu hasn’t made a mention of it throughout your walk back to the building, much to your relief and suspicion. This man would make fun of you to the ends of high hell just for keeping a plushie to bed until you were thirteen— you weren’t sure when he started developing the emotional intelligence to stay in the comfort of silence throughout your walk home.

Of course, you didn’t expect him to hold his tongue for too long. It was an empty road, and the rain was still pouring. Beomgyu held up his umbrella above your head, and started with a low voice, “Want me to beat him up?”

Your steps lagged, faltering a little in mild surprise. “You?” An invisible force started tugging on the corners of your lips. “With your lanky ass and noodle arms? Keep dreaming, loser.”

“Hey—” You had to hold back a snort when you saw his face, an evident look of unbridled offense taking over, and he stopped in his tracks just to passionately defend himself. “You take that back. I’m strong. I’m pretty sure I can lift you up with just one arm. I can beat the shit out of Jiwoong if I wanted to.”

“Sure,” you snickered. “That is if you want to end up in the hospital. You’re all skin and bones, Beomgyu. You’re weak as hell. Remember the last time we arm wrestled? I’m pretty sure it ended up with me as the winner, and you as the— eep!”

You yelped, eyes widening. Suddenly, the ground wasn’t touching your feet anymore, you could feel the rain on your skin, and the bright, blue umbrella was now on the ground. You can see nothing but the fabric of Beomgyu’s dark and drenched uniform blazer and glimpses of the upside down pavement. Your face started to heat up. You could feel his firm grip around your waist and legs.

“That was in sixth grade, doofus. Keep up,” he snorted.

“What the hell? Put me down!” you let out a grunt and tried to wiggle yourself free, but he’s unyielding— continuing the walk back home while carrying you like a sack of potatoes. “If you don’t put me down, I am going to bite you.”

“Nuh-uh.” The bastard gave your body a rough shake as a warning, and you screamed. “Not until you take back what you said earlier.” You balled your hands into a fist and hit his back. “Wow, you’re so ungrateful. I’m giving you a free ride home yet you decide to assault me. Your mother will be so disappointed when she hears this.”

“Your mother will shave your head if she finds out your haircut received a warning this morning.”

“Oooo—kay. Down you go. Ride over.” The moment Beomgyu settled you back on the ground, you gave him the nastiest glare you could muster. He gave you a grin. “Your hair is a mess.”

“Whose fault is it?” you sneer.

“Jiwoong’s,” he answered, matting down the top of your head with his hands. You winced when his fingers got caught between the wet, tangled strands. Beomgyu’s lips pursed as he tried to unravel them, brows furrowed in concentration. “I’m uninviting him to our game night tomorrow. He can eat shit.”

“He’s gonna talk shit if you do that,” you replied.

“Who cares.” He was finished tinkering with your hair. It was still pouring. “Done. Let’s go home.” You didn’t know if he made it better or worse.

“Okay,” you replied, feeling the top of your head. “But your umbrella ran away. Idiot.”

“Does it matter?” his lips quirked. “We’re already drenched, anyway.”)

The ice in your service water has already melted. You are going to kill a man named Lee Heeseung.

Why isn’t this motherfucker answering your calls? You let out a mental swear. It’s the second Saturday of your one-week break after midterms, and Heeseung organized a blind date for you and his friend today. The problem is, that said friend is nowhere to be seen. The customers next to your table have already changed thrice already. You’re not pathetic. You’re not gonna wait for him.

Right when you muster the willpower to get up, Heeseung finally answers your call. He’s quick to overtake your possible threats by immediately rambling, “Okay. Before you get mad—”

“You’re dead to me.”

“I’m sorry!” he screams-slash-pleads. “Eunseok canceled at the last minute because of this thing with his— nevermind. That’s not important. I’m gonna kick his ass the next time I see him, but please tell me you haven’t left the cafe yet.”

You bite your bottom lip. You want to lie. You want to tell him that you’ve already left thirty minutes ago and are now in your apartment with cozy pajamas and a cucumber face mask. “I’m around the area,” you reply. “Why?”

“Oh, good. Great.”

This is brow raising. The bell above the door entrance rings, catching your attention and you look up. “Why?”

“You’re still going on a date,” he tells you. “I promise you, your time definitely won’t be wasted—”

Heeseung’s voice disappears into the background. Entering the cafe is the person you want to see the least. He’s wearing the hooded sweater you got him for Christmas last year, and around his neck are the headphones you got him for his birthday.

“—so I called another friend. Don’t think of him as just a second option, okay?! I think he’s more your type anyway, and—”

He’s looking around. He still hasn’t noticed you. He’s standing in the middle of the shop and he pulls out his phone.

“—and he’s headed there right— oh! He says he’s there already!”

Beomgyu has spotted you and you want to kill yourself. Your head drops down and you bite down a scream of agony and despair. “You’ve heard of Choi Beomgyu, right? From BSEMC? I’ve mentioned him a few times. Haha. Anyway. I hope you enjoy your da—”

“Heeseung told me his friend got stood up and needed a backup.” He’s now in front of you. He’s looking down at you from behind the opposite chair. “I didn’t expect that that friend would be you.”

You’re going to kill yourself after you kill Heeseung. Better yet, why not murder Beomgyu as well so you can all rot in bloody fucking hell?

“Hello?”

“Shut up,” you grunt, trying your best to subtly hide the burning embarrassment on your face without making it obvious that your pride is now in perfectly tattered shambles. Of all people, why him? Why? For the love of god, why? “Just leave. I doubt you even want to be here. Let’s just spare each other the headache, alright?”

Beomgyu stifles a scoff. You watch as his knuckles flex while clutching the back of the chair. “I canceled a game for this.” He pulls it back and plops down on the seat like a petulant child. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Your face contorts into an unabashed grimace. You take your bag and stand up. “Okay. Then, I’m leaving.”

“You could’ve left an hour ago.”

Pause. He looks up at you, arms crossed and confident. Your upper lip twitches. You sit back down. Heeseung has already died twice in your head.

“I guess even someone as heartless as you is desperate for a little romance,” he hums, leaning back against his seat and completely at ease— a stark contrast to your end of the table: hot and bothered for all the wrong, not very sexy reasons. You’re trying to feign calmness, but the sweat dripping down your forehead from the heat of shame is ratting you out. This is the worst. This is the absolute worst.

You’re only able to breathe again when Beomgyu gets up to order something. Maybe you should order something too because your throat is as dry as bone. He returns not long after with a tray in hand. He settles it down on the table, revealing two glasses of iced tea and a plate of matcha tiramisu.

“Quit sulking,” he says. “You’re ugly when you sulk.”

With one hand, you flip him off. With the other, you use to grab one of the forks and dig into the dessert. Beomgyu mirrors your actions (minus the middle finger part), and grimaces after a spoonful lands in his mouth. “How are you eating this?” You hover a hand over your lips, pressing down a laugh. “It tastes like grass. Are you a cow? Is that it?”

Offended, you pull the plate closer to you. “Then why did you buy matcha if you’re just gonna insult it?”

“Because you like it.” Beomgyu reaches an arm over to get another bite, gags, then continues to try again. “Your tastebuds are really fucking weird. You should get them checked. I think they’re broken.”

You settle with an eye roll before taking a sip from the iced tea. This is odd. This feels like you’ve been transported back into time prior to your three-month long cold war. Choi Beomgyu is sitting in front of you and tapping on his phone laid on the table, and you’re sitting in front of him enjoying a nice piece of dessert he bought. There’s an odd cacophony inside your stomach— like butterflies and glass shards fluttering and cracking in a single enclosed space.

“I heard you’ll be playing for the E-Sports Fest next week,” you mention, trying to dig a deeper hole into this crack that managed to resurface. Beomgyu gives you a weird, insinuating look in response. “Shut your face. I just keep hearing your name being mentioned. Heeseung is obsessed with you, I think.”

“Why are you asking?” he snorts, passing you a napkin. “You want to cheer for me?”

“Ew. Why would I?” you reply, blindly wiping at the corner of your mouth. “We’re not even from the same department.”

Beomgyu’s eyebrows knit together, trained on the lower half of your face. “Tch. Then why even bring it up, you—”

Time stops. For some reason, Beomgyu has reached his arm over the table and is now touching your face, thumb pressed against the side of your lip with a napkin, the opposite side of where you were trying to wipe off.

Your eyes meet. It gets warm.

“Sorry,” he coughs out, retracting his hand to wipe the green-dusted cream off his fingers. Now, you know all of Choi Beomgyu’s tells like the back of your hand— and he’s not hiding those blushing ears from anyone. You’ve caught him. You knew his son of a bitch act was gonna crumble at some point (no, you didn’t. You thought he was gonna stay mad at you forever so now your heart is racing in glee). “If you’re done, let’s go. Come pick up your mom’s containers from my place.”

“Oh,” you breathe out. “Right.”

“I washed them.”

“Congratulations.”

He sneers. “Get up. I’m leaving you.”

The one thing you regret about making the deal with Beomgyu is missing out the opportunity of taking advantage of him and the car his parents’ gifted for graduation. Seriously. Had you known he’d be driving a private vehicle to and from campus everyday, you might have never asked for that favor in the first place. Those three months worth of bus fares could’ve been spent on your daily doses of coffee instead.

“Seatbelt,” he reminds while pulling out of the driveway. You’re mildly impressed and your face isn’t hiding it, and neither is the bashful tint on the tips of his ears. “Quit staring, you weirdo.”

“You can be kind of cool after all.” You give him a thumbs up. He grunts, and now you’re on the road back to your apartment.

It’s a quiet drive— the hum of the engine filling the early evening silence. You steal a few glances here and there, sneaking a few peeks at a new side of your friend(?) that you’ve never witnessed before. Since when was he so good at driving? He’s got only one hand on the steering wheel. It’s weird, you think. You’ve known everything about him for as long as you can remember, and finding out something new for the first time in a while— and not being the first one to find out about it— is making odd twists and turns inside your gut.

When you reach the apartment building, it’s still quiet. And when you ride up the elevator all the way to your floor, walking up the space between both of your doors, silence still permeates the walls and it makes you wonder— has it ever been this quiet between you two?

“I’ll go get the stuff. Stay here.”

You’re left behind with your messy thoughts in the hallway and before things can get even more tangled up, Beomgyu shows up again with the bright blue shopping bag you dropped off last week. “Tell the madam that her seasoned spinach is perfect as usual.” He returns the bag, a faint smile on his face.

“Go tell her that yourself,” you huff, retrieving it from him. “I’m pretty sure she calls you more often than she calls me.” The tupperwares and containers look clean. You should give him a treat for doing a good job.

“Your mother is constantly worried about her young, impressionable daughter taking her first steps of independence, but doesn’t want to be called overbearing by her only child, so she asks me about you instead.” Beomgyu’s tone is nagging. You shoot him a glare and he simply steps closer to jab a finger into your forehead. “You have no idea how hard it is to make up bullshit about what you’ve been up to. You owe me a lot, dipshit.”

You wince, smacking his hand away. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

The corners of his mouth twitch. His eyes leer away for a moment, and he lets out a huff of air through his nose. “Why? Do I know you?”

Oh god. Here he goes again.

“Why do you keep—” You stop, squeezing your eyes and taking in a deep inhale because for a moment there, you were just about to yell again. “Okay,” you restart. You should do something about your temper. “Okay. I apologize for troubling you, and I’ll tell her to quit bothering you, so—”

It was going well. It was going so well. Only if you had missed the very subtle, very irritating roll of his eyes upon your remark.

“—so you should quit being an absolute dickhead too, asshole!”

Then maybe you could’ve lived in happy ignorance, and all your progress today wouldn’t have to restart.

“Oh, so I’m the asshole?” he scoffs, incredulous. “You’re the one who told me to distance myself. You’re the one who asked. I’m just doing what you told me to do. Why am I in the wrong?” Your throat tightens, a familiar choke the moment you try to swallow.

“I never asked you to stop being friends with me, Beomgyu! I just—”

Asked you to keep our friendship hidden because I’m selfish. Because I’m insecure. Because I hate you just as much as you mean the world to me.

But you can’t tell him any of these things, can’t you?

His disappointment is clear from the look on his face. Beomgyu lets his fingers rake through his hair with a sigh. “Just go home. Thanks for the food.”

There’s something twisting inside your stomach, churning at an uncomfortable pace. It’s gnawing and grating. You’re only able to pinpoint it when Beomgyu turns back to his apartment, prompted by the resounding click of his door lock.

Ah, you realize amid the silence of the now empty hallway. It’s guilt.

#3: YOU DON’T LIKE HOW MUCH OF YOUR IDENTITY HE’S STRIPPED AWAY. You know it’s not on purpose. You know he doesn’t know. But it’s something that’s plagued you until your last few weeks of high school— the time for last chances, and final opportunities. It’s for this reason that you can’t stand him the most.

(“Hey!”

It was an unfamiliar voice that called out your name from behind you in the hallway, so you ignored it assuming that maybe they were calling someone else. It gets repeated, and you stop in front of your locker to retrieve your shoes, paying no mind to it. You’re going home alone today because Beomgyu’s out with his guy friends. “We’re having dinner together at my house later! Don’t forget!” was the last thing he yelled at you before running off. An unconscious smile crawls onto your face at the thought of it.

You felt a tap on your shoulder and heard the same voice that’d been repeating your name. You spin around, and are a little surprised to see the group standing behind you. “Hi!”

It was Haena, one of your classmates, and she was joined with two more of the girls from your class, and one that you didn’t quite recognize.

“Oh, sorry,” you bowed a little. “I didn’t know I was the one you were calling. I wasn’t trying to ignore you, sorry.” Your surprise stemmed from the fact that you weren’t really close with Haena or her friends. Not that you were on bad terms. You greeted each other from time to time, but your friend circle really just consisted of Choi Beomgyu, your deskmate Chaeryeong, and Ryunjin from the broadcasting club.

“It’s alright,” she smiled. “Do you…maybe have any plans today?”

You pulled out your shoes from the locker and closed it tightly. “No, not really.”

“Great! There’s a new cafe that opened near the school. Wanna join us?”

Well. This was unexpected. You didn’t have any other plans besides the joint family dinner you had with the Choi’s, so going on a cafe detour wouldn’t hurt. Beomgyu was also out with his other friends right now. Who says you couldn’t do the same? “Sure,” you replied. “I’ll join.”

It was a cute, cat-themed cafe with the only disappointment being that there were no actual cats— just the cat-shaped whipped cream on your strawberry drink, and the cat-shaped tiramisu on your plate. Cats weren’t usually green or pink, but you digress.

The girls were friendly. Conversation ranged from the universities you’ll all be attending, the classes you’re all about to finish, sprinkled with topics on shopping and clothes and the names of the rest of your classmates here and there. You’d started to zone out after a good while, stirring the contents of your half-empty drink as you stared at the glass windows, tinted orange by the sunset sky.

Haena cleared her throat. “So,” she started. You turned your attention back to your companions, and your eyes widened a little when you were met with all their eyes on you. Haena pronounced your name. “I’ve always been curious about something.”

You blinked. “About what?”

She leaned closer, a smile playing on her lips. “Are you and Beomgyu dating?”

You nearly choked on the sweet, strawberry drink. “What? No!”

“Really?” Seohyun nudged herself closer next to you on the seat.

“Everyone thinks you’re dating him,” said Bora. “You’re always together.”

“Ah, that’s ridiculous! I’m really not dating him!” Your face has started to warm up. Gosh, what was this? What kind of situation was this? A few of them weren’t convinced, you could tell. You pressed your lips together before breathing out, “We’ve known each other since we were like toddlers. There’s no way in hell I’d be dating him. I don’t know where you're getting all these assumptions from.”

There was a glint in Haena’s eyes that you didn’t fail to notice.

“So, you don’t have any feelings for him?” This was getting weird.

“No. No, I don’t.” And even if you did, what the hell would they be interrogating you about it?

Haena visibly brightened. “Really? Then can you set me up with him?”

You were dumbfounded.

“I’m— I’m sorry?”

Things started to click. Senior high school was almost over, and your classmates whom you’ve barely even shared a conversation with for the past three years, were taking their last chance to start something with their crushes, or some shit, under the guise of half-hearted friendliness. You’ve understood now— and you’re nothing less than offended.

“Actually, I’ve liked Beomgyu for a while now,” Haena bashfully admitted. Seohyun inserted that her friend has had a crush on him since the beginning of the year. “I thought there was something going on between the two of you so I never acted on it. But I’m so happy to hear that you two are just friends!”

You shouldn’t be annoyed. But you were. You were very annoyed.

“You’ll help me right?”

Needless to say, you went home that day with your cat tiramisu in a paper box as takeout. The next morning, the three girls greeted your classroom entrance with unabashed glares. You paid no mind and headed over to your seat at the back, where an out of place box of chocolate milk was gingerly resting on the table.

You were mildly suspicious that Choi Beomgyu was the one who put that there, so you held it in your hands with caution, examining the box closer when you took a seat.

The alleged perpetrator suddenly showed up from behind you. Your head felt heavier. Beomgyu was resting his arms on the top of your head, leaning down all of his weight onto you. “Oh wow,” he started. “Looks like someone has a secret admirer.”

You elbowed him and he let out a sharp yelp. You could see Haena giving you dirty looks from afar. “Go back to your seat,” you scolded him. “Class is starting soon.” Beomgyu listens to you well, but not after messing up your hair even further and greeting Seungmin who had just walked in.

“Are we still going after class?”

Choi Beomgyu was always surrounded by people. This was something you noticed a few months into your second year of middle school. He was like a lamp, flocked by so many buzzing insects in the night— just like right now, his face barely visible from inside the crowd at the middle of the classroom where his seat was. Even your seating assignments placed him at the center. That’s just where he’s meant to be.

“Hey, did you and Haena get into a fight?”

You looked up to see Chaeryeong barely arriving in time before the bell, pulling her seat back and plopping down right next to you.

“Don’t mind it.” You sunk your face into your arms on the desk, elbow grazing the still unopened chocolate milk on the line dividing yours and your friend’s desk. “Hey,” you let your face peek out a little from your makeshift cocoon. “From an outsider’s perspective...do Beomgyu and I give the impression that we’re, um, dating?”

She snorted. “Haven’t your parents arranged your marriage, already?”

“This is a serious question!”

Honestly, this has never crossed your mind. Not until Haena mentioned it yesterday. It took a while for things to click inside your brain, but if this misunderstanding was really not singular, then that would really explain why you have never received any confession, any valentine’s day chocolate, or love letter, or anything for the past three years of highschool. It was all Beomgyu’s fault. He’s been unknowingly sabotaging your love life and if you end up sad and dying alone, it’s all on him.

Well, I guess it’s not completely ruined. Your cheeks pressed against your arms, looking at the milk carton on your desk.

When you got up to your desk the next morning, there was another milk carton on your table.

“Hey.”

You looked up to see Seungmin hovering in front of your table. “What?”

“Not even a good morning? Beomgyu was right. You do have an attitude.” You rolled your eyes and stuffed the drink into your bag, and Seungmin decided to keep talking. “Anyway, where is he? You two usually arrive at the same time.”

“He slept through his alarm,” you replied. Then you furrowed your brows. “Why are you asking me? Couldn’t you just text him?”

“Well, it would be quicker to just ask you. Anyway, thanks.”

With that, he left. The bell rang, and your teacher arrived. You decide to save the drink until lunch time and when you got back to the classroom from the cafeteria, there was another snack on your table. For the next following days, you would find snacks suddenly spawning on your table. It was starting to get curious.

“Whoa. Holy crap. Someone might actually have a crush on you.”

It was now Friday, the end of the week, and you have accumulated a total of four milk boxes, three melon breads, and one pack of cookies all throughout. You and Beomgyu were staring down at the latest addition: a grape juice box and a packet of chocopie. He started muttering, “Does your admirer know that you snore when you—”

You gave him a kick. Beomgyu matched it with a harsh pull on your bag. He quickly ran away before you could retaliate, the rest of his body having already left, and his head peeking from the door to give you one last message.

“I’m going first! We have a raid in a while. What time is dinner later?”

“I’ll message you.”

“Alright,” he hummed. “See you. Text me if something comes up.”

This must be why people think you were dating. You were tired of it. When you were younger, people paid no mind to how much time and space you two were spending together— now that you’ve gotten a little older, maybe some things couldn’t be perceived as platonic forever.

But you don’t have any feelings for him, and neither does he for you. The only feeling you have for him is a penetrating sense of irritation. You mulled it over as you left the school building, clutching your bag straps as you walked. However, you paused upon seeing a familiar face standing at the edge of the entrance stairs. He looked like he was waiting for someone.

“Oh! Um,” he suddenly exclaimed upon noticing your approaching presence. A cough stifled out from his throat, followed by a nervous smile. “Hi.”

It was Lim Jimin, one of your classmates and one of the boys that were usually rallying up every afternoon after class to the internet cafe with Beomgyu and Seungmin like a bunch of nerds. “Hey?” you greet back. “Didn’t you guys have a raid or something today? I think they already left.”

“No, I uh, I stayed behind,” he mumbled. “Can we talk for a bit?”

The chocolate milk carton he was holding had not gone unnoticed by you. Your narrowed eyes flitted over to his fidgeting fingers. His nerves were spilling right out. “Have you been the one leaving food on my desk?”

He flinched. “Yeah— well—” A smile curled on your lips. “Damn, this is a little embarrassing. Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” you hummed. “I enjoyed them. Thanks.”

There was a tinge of pink on his cheeks, a sheepish hand on the back of his neck and it looked as if he was running through a million thoughts in his head at once. “I’ve...I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” he finally started after a moment’s silence. “Can you do me a favor?”

Your heart jumped. Holy shit. This is happening, this is actually happening.

“Y—yeah?”

Your breath hitched inside your throat. Oh my god. You might actually end your curse of lovelessness today. Oh my fucking god.

“Can you convince Beomgyu to help me get to Platinum in League?”

What?

“I—I know this sounds dumb, and it’s kinda pathetic that I had to bribe you with snacks just to get to this— but he’s been refusing to help any of us because he leaves after like three games!” Jimin exclaimed, and, upon noticing the flat look on your face, quickly gathered himself back together. “Ahem. I thought…maybe you could convince him since you’re like, his girlfriend and all.”

Your brain was a loading screen. You blinked but saw nothing but red. Beomgyu goes home after three games because you guys eat dinner at six in the evening. Jimin was giving you food as a bribe. You were not getting a confession.

All at once, the blood rose to your face,

“W-wait— is that a yes? Are you gonna ask him—”

Your shame couldn’t keep you standing there like an idiot for any longer. Every hurried step you took was a testament of your misery, and you left behind in your wake a fucking wave of turmoil and embarrassment. Fuck, your cheeks were burning. Fuck, why did Beomgyu have to entertain that idea and muddled your brain.

“Oh, you’re home?” your mother greeted the moment you kicked open your apartment door and started stomping to your room. “Where’s Beomgyu? Why didn’t you come home toge—”

“Ugh!” you groaned. “Enough about him, please!”

Did you only exist as an extension of him? As a part of him? As Choi Beomgyu’s friend, girlfriend, whatever, as the girl who’s always been around him for the past seventeen years to the point where that was all you’re known for?

You were fucking sick of it.

Your mom was scolding you for yelling at her, but you were far into your emotions to stay behind and say sorry. Your bag was left on the living room floor, and you were once again stomping out of your apartment unit, only to bump your face into Choi Beomgyu. “Whoa,” he remarked, quickly grabbing onto your shoulders. “Where are you going?”

“Out.” You shoved yourself off him.

“Someone’s cranky,” he mused, trailing behind you as you continued bulldozing down the hallway, down the stairs, out the building and on the dim and chalky path towards the playground. Beomgyu kept chattering. “What’s up? Why are you mad? Did you leave something behind in the classroom? Okay, you aren’t talking to me. That’s fine. I was gonna ask you what flowers you wanted for our graduation ceremony, but I guess I’ll just pick and choose whatever I—”

Smack!

You’ve spun around. You’ve got his face smacked in between your palms, promptly shutting him up. His eyes flew open, mouth firmly and tightly closed. “Can you stop talking for a second?” you guttered out.

Beomgyu stared at you, eyes still wide, then nodded once, still sandwiched between your palms. You bit down your bottom lip. Your ribcage was starting to squeeze in on itself. “Sorry,” you mumbled, arms falling back to your sides and you resumed your march towards the playground.

He stayed silent for the rest of the time, following you on the see-saws and the both of you exchanged ups and downs for a few moments— quiet moments— until you were the one to break it.

“Hey, fuckface,” you called out,

“What do you want, dipshit?” he replied.

“Remember when I hauled your ass to the emergency room after you broke your leg at the skatepark in 9th grade?”)

YOUR MORNING STARTED OFF NICELY. It’s the first day back to uni after your one week break. You woke up before your alarm and had the time to make a really stir-fried rice meal for breakfast (your first breakfast in a week, mind you). Your clothes are fresh from the dryer, mascara unclumpy, and you arrive at the bus stop at the same time as your bus to campus arrives, right on the dot.

Today is going great. That is until Heeseung shows up at the library after sending you a text that he’s on the way, and ruins everything with one, single statement.

“Did you sleep with Beomgyu the other night?”

The orange juice you’re drinking nearly dribbles out of your mouth.

“What the fuck?”

Your voice is louder than you thought. Heeseung shushes you and sits and pulls out the seat next to yours, ready to explain. “The guys from the coding club blew up the GC last night. A few of them saw you come out of his car and enter his apartment building together last Saturday. I think there were pictures.” Your mouth is agape. You’re speechless. “I didn’t tell them anything! Some of the guys were just around the neighborhood and happened to see you.”

Oh, no. Oh, no no no no no no.

“But, I guess...the blind date went well?”

God, fuck no.

Your worst nightmare has finally come crashing into reality.

“We live in the same building, get your mind out of the gutter!” you hiss, pulling him by the collar. Heeseung is very visibly terrified. You never wanted him to find out about your living situation in the first place because you know that he’d force you to hang out with them whenever he’s crashing at Beomgyu’s. You’re starting to regret hitting up a conversation with him during the orientation. These men are the banes of your existence. “Who is it? Who the fuck is spreading that stupid fucking rumor?”

“Please let go of me,” he squeaks out. You grunt, releasing the fabric of his shirt. He takes in a breath and fixes his clothes. “I’m not a snitch. Sorry.”

Heeseung is avoiding your eyes. He’s twiddling with the top button of his button up, nervously pressing together his lips. You run through the members of their “coding club” (it’s just a cover so they can play games in a cushy campus office). It doesn’t take long for you to come up with a name.

“Yang Jeongin.” Your friend’s panic tells you that you’re on the nail.

“He only sent the photo!” he quickly exclaims. “He never said that you two were hooking up or anything! Please, spare him, please—”

So much for a perfect morning. It’s not even nine and you’re already fucking drained.

You let out a groan, massaging your temples and balancing yourself with your elbows on the study table. Heeseung is spewing out a million apologies and you’re not taking shit. “You’re not gonna go to our clubroom and destroy our computers, right?”

“Thanks for the idea.”

“You’re a demon,” he grumbles. “What’s the big deal, anyway? You yourself said you and Beomgyu didn’t fuck. But you two went home together and you haven’t complained about him yet. That means your date went really, really—”

“Can you please just quit it?!”

That’s it. You’ve had enough. You shoot up from your seat, quickly gathering your things before you actually start throwing punches. “I’m sick and tired of hearing his name!” Heeseung gulps. He quickly scoots away to evade your haphazardly swinging bag. “Why the fuck do you all keep mentioning that piece of shit? It’s like everyone’s obsessed with him, it’s like everyone wants a chance to ride on his di—”

The words get cut off. Because when you turned around to make your leave, Choi Beomgyu was right there, behind you, and you bump into him and his blank face of terror.

“Oh.”

Yang Jeongin is also there, looking mildly scared of you.

But you’re more horrified than anyone in this hall.

Hiccup!

Your face flushes, searing hot and visibly enflamed.

“I, uh—” hiccup! “I’m about to leave anyway so you guys can—” hiccup! “—shit, fuck, fucking hell—”

You quickly swerve away, head down, but an arm swooshes over to barricade your exit path. There’s a water bottle in front of your heated face. Your line of sight follows towards the owner of the arm. Beomgyu is looking at you straight in the eye.

“Drink some water first.”

Hiccup!

Fuck, this is so embarrassing.

“Whoa. She’s so fast.”

The three boys watch your speedily retreating figure, pausing once or twice because of a hiccup, but your pace is still abnormally fast as you escape from the premises. There is no trace of you, save for the orange juice container you’d been drinking since earlier.

“There’s this tension between the two of you, you know.” Beomgyu turns his head to Heeseung who made the observation, a single eyebrow raised. “Do you two really live in the same building, or is she just making up an excuse? Seriously. Tell me how it went with you two. I was the one who set you up. I think I have the right to know.”

Beomgyu holds back a snort. He leans closer to Heeseung, a subtle smile playing on his lips. “You wanna know?”

Heeseung’s eyes sparkle. “Dude, I’m dying of curiosi—”

Smack!

“That’s none of your business.”

Beomgyu swipes the juice box from the table and promptly leaves the library despite the protests of his two friends. Out in the hallway, he doubts he could catch up to you after running away like a white collar convict, but who knows? He might get lucky— just like last Saturday.

“Hey, dude, wait up!”

An arm is hooked around his neck, and he gets pulled down with a grunt. He might be unable to catch up to you, but his friends definitely can with him. Now all his chances are gone, slipping out of his fingers like the juice container that he drops when caught between Heeseung and Jeongin shoving each other around, and it’s now completely lost upon the arrival of the people from his major.

“Hey, classes are canceled.”

“What are we having for lunch?”

“Are we having a practice run later for the festival?”

“Wait, I have to update my story— hey, look at the camera!”

They talk, but it’s all white noise. He gets carried off by static for the rest of the day. He hopes to bump into you when he gets home, but Beomgyu doesn’t even know what time you usually get home.

All the years you’ve spent mastering the perfect bitch face have finally come to fruition when you visited the programming club during lunch to make sure none of the bullshit they’re speculated escapes their clubroom doors. They all apologized— apparently Beomgyu also told them to quit their gossiping.

However not even fear can stop an inherently stupid man. Because the next day, Minjeong suddenly tells you, “hey, I didn’t know you and Choi Beomgyu were a thing!”

Now, which rat managed to slip through the door crack?

“No, we’re not,” you scrunch your nose. “Where did you get that from?”

From a friend of a friend of a friend, she says. Sungchan asked you the same thing earlier. So did some guy from one class whom you don’t even know the name of. Your head is hurting. Crap that blind date was a stupid fucking idea. Seriously, why does no one know how to mind their own business? What is it about Choi Beomgyu that people just can’t keep his name out of their mouths? He’s not even a celebrity. He’s just a freshman with a pretty face and the social skills of an annoyingly loud butterfly.

“I’m going home,” you tell her.

“Why? I thought we were having barbecue with the rest of the guys!”

Not when you’re sure you’re gonna be barraged by another slew of questions about your dumb childhood friend. You bid Minjeong goodbye and exit the campus, hopping on the bus back to your apartment with a dead set agenda in mind. You’re going to fix this. You’r gonna bring things back to normal once and for all. So when you arrive at your floor, you don’t make a left like you usually do— you turn to your right and make three hard knocks on the sturdy door.

Knock, knock, knock.

“Choi Beomgyu.”

Knock, knock, knock.

“Beomgyu, are you ho—”

It gets opened sooner than you’re used to.

“Listen. We need to talk,” you quickly start, ignoring the surprise on his face upon seeing you, ignoring the way he almost shuts the door again right into your face. You hold back a scoff, but a sneer manages to sneak out. “Things have gotten messy since last Saturday. You should’ve kept your clubmates in check. What’s the point of acting like we’re strangers when people I don’t know keep asking me if I’m your fucking girlfriend, and Lee Heeseung keeps badgering me about what’s going on between us, and— oh my fucking god. Heeseung is right there.”

Beomgyu’s body is shielding you from the view of his living room. It’s not doing a good job because Heeseung waves at you from inside. Jeongin is there too. You can’t do this anymore. You’re cursed. You’re cursed with a plague called Choi Beomgyu and his ten million friends.

Your shaking eyes flit over back to Beomgyu. He looks panicked. Your heart is threatening to jump out of your throat and shrivel up like a pathetic dried grape.

“Fuck.”

At this point, running away feels like muscle memory to you now.

“Wait, I— hold on. I’ll be back,” you hear him say right before the door clicks and there’s another pair of pattering footsteps down the hallway right behind yours. The rhythm is familiar— a lag by one step, catching up, then slowing down as if he doesn’t want to overtake you all while you bulldoze through the hallway until you reach the flight of stairs, down three floors, and you’re met with the cold wind of the outside.

It’s only now that you realize your lungs are shaking.

“Hey—”

You smack away his attempt to settle a hand on your shoulder, but you’re far too embarrassed to look up and look him in the eye. Your face is burning. It’s been burnt so many times within the span of two weeks and it’s a miracle it hasn’t been charred. “Go away. Go back upstairs,” you sniffle. All you can see is the cement ground and the worn out slippers on his feet.

He stifles out something sort of a sigh. “No.” There’s a tug on the hem of your shirt. You wobble forward. Beomgyu holds onto your arms. You finally snap your head up and see his face. “You said we needed to talk. Let’s talk.”

It’s a little pathetic how you’re so near to breaking into tears. “I changed my mind. I don’t want to.”

“Is that really what you should be saying after completely screwing yourself over?”

“Shut up.” All the strength you had in your legs has been stripped away. Beomgyu is tugging your limp body to your complex’s gazebo with ease. “How could I have known your friends would be there?” you drawl out, allowing yourself to be dragged under its overhead roof.

He settles you down onto the stairs. “Isn’t Heeseung your friend too?”

“Not anymore.” You plop down on the wood, shoulders slacked, legs outstretched. Beomgyu is standing before you with his arms crossed. “From now on, he is nothing to me.”

There’s a frown on his face. “You should’ve called before deciding to blow up like that. I did my best. You’re the one that ruined your whole stranger agenda.”

“Fuck off, I’m still trying to cope.”

You kick out your foot like a child throwing a tantrum, and Beomgyu definitely doesn’t look impressed. He walks up, signaling you to scoot over, and squeezes right next to you on the narrow stair step of the gazebo.

Shoulders pressed together, he leans slightly forward, elbows on his lap, and all you can see is the side of his face as you incline backwards so you don’t suffocate from the sudden tightness of air. “Am I like, too lame for you, or something,” he suddenly says. You blink once, failing to comprehend his words the first time. When he cocks his head back, you see the look in his eyes— earnest and raw.

You can’t help but crack out a snort.

“I’m— I’m sorry,” you sputter out. Your plaster your hands over your face, trying to suppress your misplaced chimes. “I just didn’t think you could make that kind of face. Wow, you can be serious too, huh?”

“You’re laughing,” he deadpans. “I’m trying to be serious here and you’re laughing.”

“I said I was sorry! Okay, let’s try again, let’s try again.” You clear your throat, sitting up straight and patting your palms on your lap, but something keeps tugging on the corners of your mouth and it’s hard to sit still. “No, you are not ‘too lame’ for me, Beomgyu. Where did that even come from?”

His expression bitters, unconvinced. “Then are you ashamed of me?”

“No.”

“Did I do anything abhorrently wrong?”

“What? No—”

“Am I not cool enough to be considered your friend?”

“Beomgyu, what are you talking about?” It was funny the first time, but now you’re just concerned. “Would I have stuck around your ass for almost twenty years if I thought any of that? Things haven’t been the best between us lately, but I still think we’re friends, Beomgyu, I—”

There’s a crack in your voice. Your face flushes. He’s looking at you so intently that you instinctively drop your head down before prying out the words that’s been lingering in your throat for months overdue.

“I…I hope we still are,” you mutter. “I really do.”

“Then why did you want to act like we’re not?”

There it is.

“I didn’t want to keep it up for a long time!” you reason. “I just— I just wanted to keep my distance until I’ve adjusted to uni and until I’ve made a few friends of my own because for most of my life, I’ve only been known as the girl who’s always around you and nothing else.”

It takes a gnaw at your pride to be finally saying this out loud. It’s a bitter taste on your tongue— ugly and unpalatable and you’re glad that you won’t ever have to swallow it ever again.

When you look up, you see Beomgyu make another new face you never expected from him.

“I doubt you noticed how people would only approach me because of you, but I really don’t blame you for anything. It was an unreasonable request and you had every right to be mad. I might have taken it back had we stayed around on the playground for a little longer.” You take a pause. “But then you started acting like a dick to me so I decided to be a dick to you too.”

You expect him to bite back but he doesn’t and it worries you. Shit, maybe you’ve unhauled too much. Maybe this wasn’t the right time be all vulnerable and crap but Beomgyu isn’t telling you you’re a big fucking idiot, so maybe it’s fine.

Instead, he stays quiet for a little longer, your words simmering in the air.

“I wasn’t just angry. I was hurt,” he finally says. “Like you said, you’ve been with me for all my life and you suddenly tell me to reverse all of that. How the fuck did you expect me to act like you’re nobody when we both know that at this point I can’t live without you.”

Oh.

“Shit.”

Beomgyu’s eyes widen.

“I didn’t mean— I didn’t want to say—” He’s covering the bottom half of his face with his fist. He’s turning his head away as much as he can but you can still see enough to notice. “Fuck. I didn’t mean to say that. Forget about it.”

You lean closer. “Beomgyu, are you crying?”

“No. Fuck off.”

His right shoulder is serving as his shield as you try to dig your nose further, completely turning away from you, but you don’t miss it. You can’t miss it. “Oh my god, you’re crying.” Beomgyu leers back at you ever the slightest. There’s red tinting his eyes. You expect him to scurry off back into the building after that— but, no. Instead, pulls you by the forearm, and lets his head fall onto your shoulder, his forehead pressed firmly down.

“Eat shit and die,” he mutters in between sniffles. After your initial surprise, you lift up the arm he isn’t grabbing onto to give him a few pats on the back, circles over his shoulder blades, and you stay like that for a while, for maybe too long because the sky is now darker than when you first went outside.

“Beomgyu,” you start.

“What do you want?” he muffles, as if he isn’t still draped over you like an oversized rag.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I was selfish and inconsiderate.”

You hear him sniffle again. Heeseung wouldn’t believe you if you tell him Choi Beomgyu is actually a big baby. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize the way other people were treating you,” he says. “I can’t help being such a cool guy that you get overshadowed, you know. So I’m not sorry for that— ow! Ow, what the heck!”

You pry him off by the hair. You’re sure a few strands got plucked off, but a realization you didn’t expect to glean from this was the fact that his stupid shaggy hair is actually really soft. “I think this is enough. We should head back.”

In spite of his complaining, Beomgyu trails behind you when you stand up and dust yourself before making your way back inside. It’s still quiet, save for the hisses and grunts and swears whenever Beomgyu would step on your shoes, whenever he’d bump into you and feign innocence, whenever he’d get on your nerves immediately after just reconciling with you.

It’s annoying. It’s annoying and it’s better than everything that’s been these past three months.

“Are you twelve?” you shoot him a glare, ready to punch in your door code before you get the urge to punch him instead.

“Come inside,” he tells you, nosing at his side of the apartment. “Let’s watch a movie.”

You raise a brow and cross your arms. “All of a sudden?”

“Yeah.” He mimics your pose. “Got a problem with that?”

You roll your eyes, but somehow you’re now a few steps away from your front door, and are now a few steps closer to his. “I do have a problem with it. Your fucking friends are in there.”

“I’ll deal with them.”

“Wow,” you snort. “So reliable.”

Still, you follow. Beomgyu twists his door knob and you’re suddenly nervous for the possible bullshit Heeseung would barrage you about your relationship with Beomgyu, but that doesn’t happen. The moment Beomgyu cracks open the door, his voice bounces around the inside of his apartment’s walls. “Anyone who doesn’t leave after the count of five will be banned from my apartment forever. Five. Four—”

Holy crap. You’re more surprised to see it actually work because Heeseung and Jeongin who’d been laying on the floor and tinkering with their playstation controllers have suddenly catapulted from the ground. “Wait, what about her?!” Heeseung protests as he’s being shoved by Jeongin out the door.

“She’s exempted,” Beomgyu responds. “Three. Two—”

“Whatever’s going on between you two, I take credit! You better spill the beans tomorrow. I can’t stand—”

“One.”

With that, the door is shut.

Quiet washes over. Beomgyu turns to face you. “Good?” he asks. You give him a pat on the head.

“Good.” He’s like a puppy, you think, and retract your arm before spinning around to look around his living space. “What are we watching?”

It’s your first time inside, and the first thing you notice is how freaking dark it is inside his apartment. The windows are covered by blackout curtains, the television’s blue light and the light bulb from the kitchen island being the only light sources inside. You take the liberty to plop down on the floor in front of the sofa, further welcoming yourself to turn off the game the two were playing to scroll through Netflix.

“Remember the movie we got in trouble for watching?” Beomgyu rouses. He’s in the kitchen and cracking open the cupboards. “It was in eighth grade, I think.”

“The one that our parents thought was porn?” you question. Anyone would have thought it was porn with the word Bodies and the 18+ label on the CD case. “I don’t really recall the plot.”

“Me neither. All I can remember were your pissbaby screams.”

“I was fourteen!”

He throws you a bag of chips and settles down right next to you. “Yeah, and so was I. Gimme the remote, scaredy cat.”

This guy is a perpetual test on your patience, but you continue to let him test you anyway. Before long, the television is shrouded by the familiar graphic imagery that scared you shitless early into your teenhood, and Beomgyu’s warmth is seeping into your side. His face is outlined by the bright red douses onscreen, melting into the contours of his face. “What are you looking at?” he asks, eyes absentmindedly still on the screen, hand mechanically digging into the bag of chips resting on your lap. “Don’t tell me you’re still scared? Wow, what a baby.”

“Coming from you? Your eyes are still red, Beomgyu. Your big baby tears have stained my shirt.” You swat his hand away. A creak rips out from the speakers. “Maybe you’re the one acting all tough.” Suspenseful music builds up. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell your friends and fans that the great Choi Beomgyu is actually— eek!”

There’s a jumpscare. And Beomgyu is laughing his ass off as you unbury your face from his shoulders, ungripping the wrinkled fabric of his shirt with a sharp glare and flushed cheeks. “Not a single word from your whore mouth,” you warn. He’s grinning like crazy as he looks down at you.

“You haven’t changed a bit.”

“Neither have you,” you sneer, trying to play off how you flinched at the sudden loud noise from the screen, but he’s probably noticed. How could he not notice every jitter from your bones when your legs are practically tangled together, when he keeps reaching out an arm over you to steal from the chip bag you keep nestled on your side away from him.

The next moments are filled with nothing but the noise of guts ripping, limps splattering, and blood-curdling screams.

“Can we watch something else?!”

“No way. Quit being lame and suck it up.”

Yet— in spite of the jumps and squirms and suppressed squeaks from your person— you haven’t felt this comfortable in months.

YOU DON’T LIKE CHOI BEOMGYU. You don’t like how much of your time he’s wasted. You don’t like how much of your pride he’s forced you to swallow. You don’t like how much of your identity he’s inadvertently stripped away.

You don’t like him for all those things, but here you are— dressed in his department’s colors, carrying a sign with his stupid face printed on, and waiting for the past thirty god damned minutes because he was supposed to be here ages ago for the stupid fucking E-Sports Fest that you’re not even remotely interested in.

If you don’t show up in five, I’m going home, you angrily mash on your phone. You’re risking it all here. If Heeseung sees you in this traitor outfit, he’s going to give you the silent treatment for a week. The bastard still owes you two more weeks of lunch to repent. You can’t lose the upper hand. You can’t lose your leverage.

Your phone buzzes. Had to piss. Be there in a bit, his reply says.

“I don’t need to be informed about your bladder activities, you freak,” you grumble to yourself. Your bright orange ensemble has been catching unwanted attention. That or his face on your sign. Any minute longer, you’re going to bury yourself alive.

“Excuse me.”

You feel a tap on your shoulder. You turn around and see an unfamiliar face. He’s wearing the same shirt color as you. “Are— are you friends with Choi Beomgyu?” he asks. The bastard has collected another fanboy. You feel a throb in the side of your head.

“Yes. Yes, I’m fucking friends with Choi Beomgyu. What about it? What do you want?”

“Whoa, there.”

The said bastard swoops in and swings an arm over your shoulder and presses you to his side. “Sorry about that,” he tells the guy. Your sneer deepens. Beomgyu gives you a subtle pinch on the arm. “My friend is just grumpy because we lost a game to the engineering department earlier. Anyway, how can I help you?”

Orange number two wanted to ask for a picture with him because he was so cool in the Sudden Attack match earlier. Beomgyu excuses himself for a moment and they take a quick photo. “Tangerines are supposed to look pretty, you know,” your stupid friend announces once he gets back to you. You start making your way to the venue for his next match. It’s in a closed classroom. There’s a projector screen outside to livestream it. “Quit scowling. You’re scaring the kids.”

“That’s the plan,” you tell him. He clicks his tongue and shakes his head.

“If you keep acting like that, I might get the wrong idea,” he says. You look at him. There’s a subtle smile on his face and you don’t like it. “It’s like you only want me for yourse— ow! Joking! Joke— it was a joke! Jeez.”

“Go win, or whatever.” You shove him off seeing that you’ve arrived. It’s already pretty crowded. You’re scanning the area for a good spot to squeeze into.

“I better be hearing your cheers from inside the classroom.”

“Don’t bet on it,” you send him off with a smile. “If you lose, I’m unfriending you.”

“Not the first time you’d be doing it.”

“Fuck off. Good luck.”

He nods with a salute and an expression that mirrors yours before disappearing off into the classroom, and you’re left with two dozen bodies uncomfortably wedged in the hallway just to watch him play a game you don’t even know the god damned rules for.

You don’t like Beomgyu. His face is something you’re sick of seeing after nearly twenty years of being stuck with him.

You don’t like him. Not even when he seems to always pick you despite having a million other options. Not even when he single-mindedly bulldozes straight into you despite having a whole army cheering for him on the sides after he’s won another game for his department, waiting for your praise and the usual swears you spit on his face with a bright smile.

“Congrats, fuckface,” you say, receiving him in your arms as he engulfs you in a tight hug. You give him a few pats on the back for good measure.

“You’re treating me to dinner, dipshit,” he grins, pulling away, but keeping a hold of your shoulders.

“Spoiled brat,” you sneer.

You don’t like him. He keeps buzzing around you like an immortal mosquito that just doesn’t die even after being swatted away tens of thousands of times.

“Only to you,” he hums, looping an arm around your neck and starting dragging you along forward. “Let’s go. I’m hungry.”

You don’t like Choi Beomgyu.

“Where do you wanna eat?”

You don’t. You really don’t.

#choi beomgyu x reader #beomgyu x reader #txt x reader #tomorrow x together x reader #choi beomgyu x you #beomgyu x you #txt x you #tomorrow x together x you #choi beomgyu scenarios #beomgyu scenarios #choi beomgyu fanfic #beomgyu fanfic #choi beomgyu fluff #beomgyu fluff #txt fluff #tomorrow x together fluff

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gyorouis · 4 months ago

Text

𐙚 HEARTSTRINGS.

— "you are mine i am yours, isn't it obvious that there's something one of us wants to admit?"

genre: angst, fluff, bandmates to friends to lovers :>>

pairing: bandmate!beomgyu x afab!reader

warning: swearing, kiss (?), let me know if i forgot anything!

wordcount: 11.8k :>>

now playing: one click straight — mrt ୨ৎ , zild — lia ୨ৎ

if it wasn’t your friend crying to you to join the band, you might have ignored the opportunity altogether. you had heard of the band through chaeyoung, your friend who had harbored a not-so-secret crush on beomgyu for as long as you could remember. she spoke of him with a dreamy look in her eyes, often mentioning his talent and the way he seemed to pour his soul into every note he played.

“he's amazing,” chaeyoung would say, her cheeks flushing slightly. “and so kind. you should see how he treats everyone in the band.”

you nodded along, though your thoughts were often elsewhere, lost in the chords and melodies you created in your room. music had always been your escape, a place where you could express the things words often failed to capture.

one evening, as you sat with chaeyoung at your usual coffee shop, she burst into the room with an excitement you rarely saw in her. she practically bounced over to your table, her eyes sparkling with a mix of excitement and nervous energy. “guess what?” she said, barely able to contain herself. “the band is looking for a new guitarist and vocalist!”

you raised an eyebrow, curious but cautious. “and?”

“and you should totally try out!” she exclaimed, her eyes wide with enthusiasm. “you’re perfect for it. plus, it would be a great way for me to get closer to beomgyu.”

you chuckled at her transparency. “so this is your grand plan? get me into the band so you can make your move on beomgyu?”

she grinned, unashamed. “exactly. come on, it’ll be fun. and you love playing music. it’s a win-win.”

you sighed, feeling the weight of her request. joining a band was a big commitment, and the thought of performing in front of people made your stomach churn. “i don’t know, chaeyoung. i’m not really a performer. i like playing in my room, where no one can judge me.”

her face fell, and you could see the disappointment in her eyes. “but you’re so talented. it’s a waste to keep all that to yourself. please, just give it a shot. for me?”

you shook your head, standing firm. “i can’t. it’s just too much.”

chaeyoung’s shoulders slumped, and she stared at her coffee cup, her fingers tracing the rim. “i really thought you’d say yes,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper. “this means a lot to me.”

you felt a pang of guilt, but your mind was made up. “i’m sorry, chaeyoung. i just can’t.”

the next day, chaeyoung showed up at your door, her eyes red and puffy from crying. she looked at you with such desperation that it broke your heart. “please,” she begged, tears streaming down her face. “i need this. i need you to help me.”

you were taken aback by her raw emotion. chaeyoung was always so composed, so put-together. seeing her like this, so vulnerable, made you reconsider. “chaeyoung, i… i don’t know if i can do this.”

she grabbed your hands, squeezing them tightly. “you can. i know you can. you’re amazing, and this could be such a great opportunity for you. and for us.”

you sighed, feeling the weight of her request. joining a band was a big commitment, but the idea of playing music with others, of sharing that connection, was tempting. besides, you couldn't deny chaeyoung anything when she looked at you with those pleading eyes.

“alright,” you said finally, a small smile tugging at your lips. “i’ll do it.”chaeyoung practically squealed with delight, hugging you tightly. “thank you, thank you, thank you! you won’t regret it, i promise.”

your first encounter with the band took place in their practice studio, a space filled with the rich scent of old instruments and the echo of past performances. when you arrived, beomgyu, yeonjun, taehyun, and kai were already there, their presence creating a lively buzz in the room. the setup was intimate—four chairs arranged in a semi-circle with instruments strewn about, evidence of countless hours spent together.

beomgyu greeted you first, his gaze warm yet scrutinizing. “hey, you must be the new applicant. i’m beomgyu, the bassist.”

you nodded, trying to steady your nerves. “yeah, that’s me. nice to meet you.”

yeonjun, with his easygoing demeanor, flashed a reassuring smile. “i’m yeonjun, the drummer. welcome to the band.”

taehyun, the lead guitarist with an intense focus, gave a nod of acknowledgment. “taehyun. let’s see what you’ve got.”

kai, the youngest and the most energetic of the group, leaned in with a grin. “i’m kai. excited to hear you play!”

as you set up your guitar and adjusted the microphone, the room filled with a quiet anticipation. your heart pounded in your chest as you prepared for your audition. chaeyoung stood by the side, her supportive presence a small comfort amidst your growing anxiety.

you started with a familiar song, one you’d practiced tirelessly in your room. your fingers trembled slightly as you strummed the first chords, your voice wavering but determined. the band members listened intently, their expressions ranging from casual interest to focused concentration.

when you finished, there was a moment of silence. beomgyu broke it with a thoughtful nod. “not bad. your style is different from what we’re used to, but that’s not a bad thing.”

yeonjun added, “i agree. you’ve got potential. it’ll take some time to get used to playing with us, but i think you could fit in.”

taehyun’s gaze was piercing, but there was a hint of approval in his eyes. “we’re looking for someone who can bring something fresh to the table. if you’re up for the challenge, we’d be happy to have you.”

kai, always the enthusiast, clapped his hands. “great job! when can we start practicing together?”

chaeyoung’s eyes sparkled with relief and joy as she hugged you tightly. “see? i told you you’d do great!”

the initial excitement quickly gave way to the reality of integrating into the band. you quickly learned that fitting into their established rhythm was more challenging than you’d anticipated. during the first few practice sessions, you struggled to synchronize with yeonjun’s drumming and taehyun’s lead guitar riffs. your attempts to harmonize with kai’s backing vocals often felt awkward, and you could sense the band’s growing frustration.

one particular practice, as you flubbed a crucial part of a song, yeonjun let out a sigh of frustration. “let’s take that from the top. we need to tighten up.”

beomgyu, sensing your growing frustration, pulled you aside during a break. “hey, don’t worry. it takes time to adjust. let’s work through this together.”

you nodded, grateful for his support. “thanks, beomgyu. i appreciate it.”

over the next few weeks, you and beomgyu spent extra time practicing together. he was patient and encouraging, helping you work through the rough patches. you started to notice a rhythm in your interactions, both musically and personally. he would often tease you about your tendency to overthink and offer playful suggestions to ease your nerves.

one evening, after a particularly successful practice session, you and beomgyu sat on the worn-out couch in the studio, sharing a moment of respite. “so, what made you stick with the band?” you asked, genuinely curious.

beomgyu shrugged, a thoughtful look on his face. “i guess i just enjoy making music with people who challenge me. and you’ve definitely brought a new dynamic to our sound.”

you smiled, feeling a sense of accomplishment. “i’m glad to hear that. it’s been tough, but i’m starting to feel like i’m finding my place.”

beomgyu’s gaze softened. “you are. and you’re doing great. it’s all about finding the right groove and getting to know each other.”

with each practice session and performance, the bond between you and the band grew stronger. you started to feel more comfortable, both on stage and off. the initial awkwardness of your role began to fade as you settled into the rhythm of the group. the chemistry between you and beomgyu began to blossom, marked by shared laughter, spontaneous jams, and heartfelt conversations.

one evening, after a particularly grueling rehearsal, you all gathered in the studio’s lounge area. the dim lighting cast a warm glow over the room as the band members slumped into the worn-out couches, still buzzing from the energy of the session.

“hey, that last song was fire,” kai said, stretching out his arms. “we really nailed it.”

beomgyu, his bass still resting on his lap, looked over at you with a grin. “yeah, you were killing it tonight. i think we’ve finally hit our stride.”

you felt a flush of pride at his compliment. “thanks. it felt great playing with you guys.”

“i can tell,” beomgyu replied, his smile widening. “you’ve really found your groove. how’s everything been going for you outside the band?”

“busy,” you said with a laugh. “but it’s all good. i’m actually starting to enjoy the chaos.”

“chaos?” beomgyu raised an eyebrow. “sounds like a good story.”

you shrugged. “nothing too exciting. just balancing school and shits, you know how it is.”

the conversation drifted into lighter topics, with beomgyu and you trading jokes and anecdotes. it was moments like these, away from the pressures of practice, that made you realize how much you valued the connection you were building with him and the rest of the band.

chaeyoung’s efforts to get closer to beomgyu became increasingly noticeable. she would often linger after practice, her laughter ringing out in the studio as she shared stories and asked questions about his music. she seemed to be making every effort to draw his attention, her eyes sparkling with admiration.

one evening, chaeyoung caught you off guard as she approached you with a conspiratorial smile. “hey, so, did you notice how beomgyu was totally into that last song we played?”

you chuckled. “yeah, he seemed pretty pumped about it.”

chaeyoung leaned in, her voice dropping to a whisper. “i’m thinking of asking him to grab coffee sometime. you know, just to talk more about his music. what do you think?”

“sounds like a good idea,” you replied, trying to sound supportive even though you felt a pang of discomfort. “i’m sure he’d love to chat more about it.”

“great!” chaeyoung said, her eyes lighting up. “i was hoping you’d help me figure out a good way to ask him. maybe during our next session?”

“sure,” you said with a nod, masking your unease. “i can help.”

despite your efforts to support chaeyoung, you couldn’t shake the feeling of being caught in an awkward middle ground. you found yourself often standing back while chaeyoung and beomgyu engaged in deep conversations, your role feeling secondary. yet, even with this small discomfort, you still cherished the moments when you could connect with beomgyu and the rest of the band.

one evening, as the band wrapped up a particularly intense practice session, chaeyoung seized the opportunity to suggest they all grab dinner together. her tone was casual, but you could sense her underlying intent to include beomgyu in the plans.

“hey, we should all go out for dinner after practice,” she said with a bright, almost conspiratorial smile. “there’s this great new place i’ve been wanting to try. what do you think, beomgyu?”

beomgyu, who was adjusting the strap on his bass guitar, looked up with a thoughtful expression. “sure, that sounds good. i’m always up for trying new places.”

chaeyoung’s eyes lit up with excitement. “awesome! it’ll be fun to hang out outside of practice.”

you hesitated for a moment before nodding in agreement. “sounds great. i’d love to join.”

the group made their way to the restaurant, and you found yourself feeling a mix of apprehension and curiosity. the place chaeyoung had picked was cozy, with dim lighting and a menu full of intriguing options. as everyone settled into their seats, chaeyoung made a point to sit next to beomgyu, her body angled towards him as she began chatting animatedly about the restaurant’s unique dishes.

“so, have you tried the truffle fries here?” chaeyoung asked, leaning slightly closer. “i’ve heard they’re amazing.”

beomgyu, who was studying the menu, looked up with a smile. “no, but they sound great. i’m definitely down to try them.”

chaeyoung’s excitement was palpable. “perfect! we’ll get a bunch of appetizers to share. oh, and what about your favorite bands, beomgyu? i’m curious to know what kind of music you’re into.”

beomgyu chuckled, clearly enjoying the attention. “i’m into a mix of stuff—rock, jazz, a bit of indie. it really depends on my mood.”

as the evening unfolded, you couldn’t help but notice how chaeyoung maintained close proximity to beomgyu. she’d casually brush against him when reaching for the shared dishes or laugh a little too loudly at his jokes. each time she did, you could see the subtle pleasure in her eyes, and it was clear she was trying to catch his attention.

your own attempts at conversation felt stilted in comparison. you chatted with kai and the others, but whenever you tried to join in the conversation with beomgyu and chaeyoung, it felt like you were intruding. you awkwardly sipped your drink, trying to find a way to fit into the lively exchange.

as the evening progressed, you ended up sitting across from beomgyu. you watched him more closely now, observing the comfortable ease in his demeanor. he seemed genuinely engaged with chaeyoung, listening attentively and responding with thoughtful comments. his laughter was warm, and his eyes sparkled with a genuine interest that made you feel both envious and intrigued.

chaeyoung’s laughter was infectious, and it seemed to draw beomgyu in even more. “so, beomgyu,” she asked, her voice bright, “what inspired you to pick up the bass in the first place?”

beomgyu leaned back, his expression thoughtful. “i’ve always loved the rhythm and the groove. my older brother used to play, and i guess i just wanted to follow in his footsteps. plus, there’s something about the bass that just feels... essential to the music.”

“that’s really cool,” chaeyoung said, her eyes wide with admiration. “i love how passionate you are about it.”

you watched the exchange, feeling a pang of discomfort as you saw how effortlessly chaeyoung connected with beomgyu. you admired his passion, but you couldn’t help but feel a bit sidelined in the conversation.

the evening ended with everyone feeling satisfied and relaxed, the conversations flowing easily. as you all walked back to your respective homes, chaeyoung was buzzing with excitement, clearly thrilled with how the night had gone. you, on the other hand, found yourself lost in thought, as to why you are feeling a sudden thug on your chest upon remembering how close chaeyoung was with beomgyu earlier, and it felt wrong, you should’ve feel this way, not when your bestfriend if finally having more time with her crush.

another day, during a band rehearsal, chaeyoung suggested you help her with a surprise project for beomgyu—a personalized guitar pick. she wanted to give it to him as a gesture of appreciation for all his hard work and dedication. you agreed, though your heart wasn’t fully in it. you couldn’t help but wonder if this was her way of marking her territory, claiming her place in beomgyu’s life.

as you worked on the project together, chaeyoung’s enthusiasm was evident. “i really think this will make him happy,” she said, her eyes shining with hope. “he’s always so dedicated to the band, and this is a small way to show our appreciation.”

you nodded, trying to share in her excitement. “yeah, it’s a nice gesture. he’ll definitely appreciate it.”

when the day finally came to present the gift, chaeyoung was practically bouncing with anticipation. you watched as she handed the guitar pick to beomgyu, her smile radiant with pride. he accepted it with a surprised look, clearly touched by the thoughtful gesture.

“thanks, chaeyoung,” he said, his voice warm. “this is really cool. you didn’t have to, but i appreciate it.”

you could see the way chaeyoung’s eyes sparkled with happiness, but you also noticed the way beomgyu’s gaze lingered on her, a soft smile playing on his lips, and it made your heart twist with a confusing mix of emotions.

despite your efforts to help chaeyoung, you began to notice subtle changes in beomgyu’s behavior towards you. at band practices, his interactions with you became more frequent and personal. what had once been brief exchanges about setlists and practice schedules now turned into longer conversations that delved into more personal territory.

one afternoon, as you were setting up your gear, beomgyu approached you with a thoughtful expression. “hey, i’ve been meaning to ask,” he started, casually leaning against the wall, “what’s your favorite song to play?”

you looked up, a bit surprised by the question. “oh, um, that’s a tough one. i really like ‘wonderwall’ by oasis. it’s got a great vibe.”

beomgyu nodded, his eyes lighting up with interest. “nice choice. i love that song too. the melody is just... it’s so catchy, you know?”

“yeah, exactly,” you replied, feeling a bit more at ease. “what about you? what’s your favorite?”

beomgyu thought for a moment. “i’d have to say ‘under the bridge’ by the red hot chili peppers. there’s something about the way the bass line carries the song that just resonates with me, but if i have to brag to someone, i’d choose any arctic monkey’s song.” he chuckles.

as he spoke, you couldn’t help but notice the way his gaze lingered on you, a soft intensity in his eyes that made your heart race. there was a warmth in his expression that made you feel like you were the only person in the room.

the change in his behavior wasn’t limited to just band practice. during breaks, he would often find reasons to sit near you, casually mentioning his latest musical experiments or asking for your opinions on new tracks he was working on. his conversations with you were filled with personal anecdotes and stories from his life, and he seemed genuinely interested in hearing about yours.

one evening after practice, as the band packed up, beomgyu casually walked over to where you were putting away your equipment. “so, you mentioned you’re studying music theory. how’s that going?” he asked, leaning against the counter.

you glanced up, surprised by his interest. “it’s going well. it’s a lot of theory and practice, but i’m getting the hang of it. why do you ask?”

“just curious,” he said with a grin. “i’ve always thought about diving deeper into theory myself. it’s fascinating how it all connects.”

you smiled, feeling a sense of connection. “yeah, it is. it’s like uncovering the secrets behind the music.”

“exactly,” beomgyu said, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer. “hey, i’ve been meaning to ask if you’d like to come to a jam session this weekend. just a few of us hanging out and playing some music. it could be fun.”

your heart skipped a beat. “that sounds awesome. i’d love to.”

“great,” beomgyu said, his smile widening. “i’ll text you the details.”

as the week went on, you found yourself looking forward to the jam session with increasing anticipation. the way beomgyu interacted with you made you feel special, and you couldn’t help but wonder if there was something more behind his actions.

the jam session arrived, and it was as laid-back and enjoyable as you had hoped. you found yourself immersed in the music, with beomgyu often glancing over at you with a smile that made your heart flutter. during a break, as you all sat around with drinks and snacks, beomgyu casually asked, “so, what’s one thing you’ve always wanted to try musically but haven’t had the chance to yet?”

you thought for a moment. “i’ve always wanted to experiment with producing my own tracks. it seems like a fun way to explore different sounds and styles.”

“that’s cool,” beomgyu said, nodding thoughtfully. “i’ve done a bit of that myself. if you ever want to collaborate or need any tips, just let me know. i’d be happy to help.”

“thanks,” you said, feeling a rush of excitement. “i might take you up on that.”

the evening ended on a high note, with everyone in good spirits and the music flowing effortlessly. as you said your goodbyes, beomgyu lingered a bit longer, his gaze meeting yours with a warmth that made your heart race.

“it was really great having you there tonight,” he said, his voice soft. “i hope we can do it again soon.”

“me too,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. “i had a lot of fun.”

“awesome,” beomgyu said with a smile. “i’ll see you at practice.”

as you walked home, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was shifting between you and beomgyu. his attention and the personal nature of your conversations left you both exhilarated and curious about where things might lead.

one afternoon, after a particularly intense practice, beomgyu approached you with a small, hesitant smile. “hey, do you have a minute?”

you nodded, feeling a flutter of anticipation. “sure, what’s up?”

he led you to a quieter corner of the studio, away from the others. “i was thinking,” he began, his voice slightly uncertain, “that maybe we could work on a new song together. just the two of us.”

you felt a rush of excitement mixed with apprehension. “m-me? i mean, yeah, w-we could!”

as you worked on the song together, the atmosphere between you shifted. there were moments when your hands brushed, your eyes meeting in shared understanding. beomgyu’s smiles became more frequent, and his laughter seemed to come more easily around you. it was clear that he enjoyed your company and valued your input, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something more behind his gestures.

one evening, as you and beomgyu took a break from working on the song, he looked at you with an intensity that made your heart race. “you know,” he said softly, “i’ve really enjoyed getting to know you. you’ve got this way of making everything seem... better.”

you were taken aback, your breath catching in your throat. “thanks, beomgyu. i’ve enjoyed working with you too.”

his gaze lingered, and you could feel the tension in the air. there was a moment of silence before he spoke again, his voice barely above a whisper. “i’m glad you’re here.”

your internal conflict grew more pronounced as these interactions continued. you started to realize that your feelings for beomgyu were deepening, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore them. you found yourself torn between your desire to support chaeyoung and your own growing affection for him.

one evening, as you and chaeyoung were leaving the studio, she turned to you with a hopeful smile. “so, how do you think things are going with beomgyu?”

you hesitated, unsure how to answer. “he’s been really great. we’ve been working on some new music together, and it’s been... good.”

chaeyoung’s eyes sparkled with anticipation. “i knew you’d get along! i’m so glad. do you think he likes me?”

you swallowed hard, the weight of your promise to chaeyoung heavy on your shoulders. “i’m sure he does. he seems to appreciate everything you’ve done for him.”

as you walked away, you felt a deep sense of conflict. the more time you spent with beomgyu, the more your own feelings grew. but you had made a promise to chaeyoung, and the thought of betraying that promise weighed heavily on you.

it was becoming increasingly clear that this situation would be more complicated than you had anticipated. your growing affection for beomgyu and your loyalty to chaeyoung were pulling you in different directions, leaving you to grapple with the tangled emotions that had become an inescapable part of your life.

the band had just wrapped up a particularly intense practice session. the studio, once alive with vibrant energy and the hum of instruments, now felt eerily still and heavy. sweat beaded on your brow as you put away your guitar, your fingers still tingling from the final, emotionally charged chords. the song you’d been working on was deeply emotional, its raw lyrics and haunting melody leaving everyone exhausted yet exhilarated. the last note seemed to linger in the air like a whisper of shared sentiment, an echo of the vulnerability and connection you all had just experienced.

as you wiped your face with a towel, you glanced around the studio and noticed beomgyu watching you from across the room. his usual playful demeanor was replaced by something more intense, almost somber. his eyes, usually bright and mischievous, were now soft and contemplative, their gaze fixed on you with an intensity that made your pulse quicken.

beomgyu approached you as the band members began to pack up, their casual chatter and the clatter of equipment creating a backdrop of normalcy. “you were incredible tonight,” he said, his voice low and almost lost in the noise of the studio. the sincerity in his tone made your heart skip a beat. his eyes held a softness you hadn’t seen before, making it hard to catch your breath.

“thanks, beomgyu,” you replied, trying to maintain your composure. your voice came out softer than you intended, almost betraying the whirlwind of emotions inside you.

the air between you was thick with unspoken words, each of you caught in a delicate dance of emotion. the studio, once a lively hub of activity, now felt like a small, enclosed space where every glance and gesture seemed amplified. as the others began to leave, their conversations fading into the background, beomgyu’s eyes remained locked on yours.

“can we talk?” he asked, his voice carrying a weight of unspoken urgency.

you nodded, your heart pounding as you led him to a quieter corner of the studio. the silence that followed was almost unbearable, filled with the lingering echoes of your previous song. the room seemed to close in around you, the weight of anticipation pressing down on you both. beomgyu’s gaze was unwavering, a mix of vulnerability and resolve that made your own feelings swell.

“w-what do you wanna talk about?” you could feel the tension in the air, thick and charged, as beomgyu took a step closer. his eyes searched yours, seeking something that neither of you could quite name. suddenly, he leaned in, and his lips met yours in a kiss that was both tender and probing, as if he were trying to convey everything he felt in that single, fleeting moment. it was a kiss filled with longing, confusion, and an unspoken plea for clarity. the contact was gentle yet electrifying, an exploration of something deeply felt but hard to articulate.

when he finally pulled back, his eyes searched yours, asking questions without words. you could see the hope and fear reflected in them, a mirror to your own tumultuous feelings. the silence stretched between you, each of you grappling with the weight of the moment.

“beomgyu...” you began, your voice trembling despite your attempt at calmness. “i can’t, we can’t.”

his brow furrowed in confusion and hurt. “why?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper. the pain in his eyes was palpable, and it made your heart ache even more.

“we shouldn’t,” you replied, each word feeling like a weighty anchor dragging you down. the finality in your voice was almost a physical force, pushing him away. the room seemed to contract around you, intensifying the emotional distance that had suddenly opened up between you.

beomgyu’s expression shifted from confusion to hurt, and he took a step back, his shoulders slumping slightly. “i... i thought...”

without waiting for a response, you turned and fled the studio. the dim light of the corridor felt cold against the warmth of the emotions you were trying to escape. your heart pounded in your chest, each step away from him a painful reminder of the feelings you couldn’t fully confront. the echoes of your last moments with beomgyu seemed to follow you, a haunting reminder of what had just transpired.

as you reached the outside, the cool night air did little to calm the storm within you. you leaned against the wall, trying to steady your breathing, but the image of beomgyu’s hopeful eyes lingered in your mind, a painful reminder of what you had just denied.

the next few days were a blur of avoidance and reflection. you found yourself retreating from the band, your absence a noticeable gap in the group's dynamic. rehearsals felt awkward without your presence, the energy of the room slightly diminished. your decision to distance yourself from beomgyu and the band was driven by a chaotic swirl of emotions, leaving you feeling paralyzed and uncertain.

you spent long hours alone, grappling with the confusion and guilt that had taken over your thoughts. the warmth of beomgyu's kiss replayed in your mind, contrasting sharply with the clarity of your decision to pull away. every time you tried to rationalize your feelings, you found yourself trapped in a loop of doubt and self-recrimination.

your avoidance of the band was evident. when kai called you, his voice laced with concern, you made excuses. “i’m just swamped with assignments,” you said one evening, though the truth was far more complex and painful. “i need to catch up on some studying.”

kai’s voice softened, but you could hear the disappointment and worry. “you’ve been MIA for a while. we miss you. is everything okay?”

you hesitated, feeling the weight of her concern pressing down on you. “yeah, just... a lot going on. i’ll be back soon. promise.”

every encounter with beomgyu was now fraught with tension and awkwardness. when you accidentally ran into him in the hallway, you avoided eye contact, your heart racing as you mumbled a quick, “sorry, gotta run.” his puzzled expression was a sharp reminder of the unresolved feelings you were trying to escape.

one day, as you walked past the studio, you could hear the band inside, laughing and playing their instruments. the familiar sounds only served to deepen the ache in your chest. you paused for a moment, fighting the urge to open the door and join them, but the thought of facing beomgyu made your anxiety spike. instead, you turned on your heel and walked away, your footsteps echoing in the empty corridor.

in a moment of weakness, you sought solace in a quiet coffee shop near campus. the café’s soft lighting and mellow music provided a temporary refuge from the turmoil inside you. as you sipped your coffee, you found yourself lost in thought, staring blankly at the steaming cup in front of you. the barista’s cheery greeting when he brought your order seemed to jar you from your reverie.

“everything alright?” he asked, noticing the pensive look on your face.

you forced a smile, though it didn’t reach your eyes. “yeah, just... thinking things over.”

as you sat there, your phone buzzed with a message from taehyun. [hey, we’re meeting at our favorite diner tonight. we haven’t seen you in ages. please come.]

you stared at the message, your emotions a turbulent mix of guilt and longing. you knew the band was trying to reach out, and taehyun’s request made you feel even more isolated. you typed a quick reply. [i’m sorry, can’t make it tonight. maybe next time.]

later that evening, you walked aimlessly around campus, trying to clear your mind. the night air was cool and crisp, a stark contrast to the storm of emotions you were navigating. you found yourself near the band’s usual practice spot, where the faint strains of music could still be heard through the closed door. the sound was like a beacon, pulling you in, but you resisted the urge to go inside.

instead, you leaned against a nearby wall, staring at the ground, and tried to silence the conflicting thoughts racing through your mind. you missed the time where you bond, the music, and most of all, the connection you felt with beomgyu. but the guilt over your decisions and the fear of complicating things further held you back.

as you stood there, lost in thought, you heard footsteps approaching. you glanced up to see beomgyu and a couple of the other band members walking toward the practice space. beomgyu’s eyes met yours for a fleeting moment, and you saw a flicker of recognition and sadness in his gaze. you quickly averted your eyes and pushed off the wall, heading in the opposite direction. the weight of his gaze lingered on you, a painful reminder of the unresolved feelings and the barrier you had built between yourselves.

the next few days continued in this pattern of avoidance and reflection. you tried to immerse yourself in other activities—studying, hanging out with friends, and even joining a new club—to distract yourself from the growing rift between you and the band. but no matter how hard you tried, the pull of your unresolved feelings and the ache of missing the band’s presence remained ever-present.

you avoided the band’s practices, your absence becoming a topic of concern and whispers among the members. chaeyoung tried to reach out, but you deflected her inquiries with vague responses, unable to explain the complexity of what you were going through. the weight of your decisions and the growing distance between you and those you cared about only seemed to deepen with each passing day.

chaeyoung, on the other hand, continued her efforts to get closer to beomgyu. she seemed determined to pursue him, and you found yourself reluctantly setting up more opportunities for them to spend time together while you tried your best to ditch practices and avoid them, beomgyu to be exact. each one a painful reminder of your own conflicted heart.

the tension between you and chaeyoung suddenly grew, the strain becoming increasingly visible. her enthusiasm for beomgyu seemed to highlight the awkwardness between you two. one evening, after an especially intense practice, you returned to the band. the absence of your usual presence had left a noticeable void, and the atmosphere was tinged with unresolved emotions.

beomgyu, noticing your arrival, tried to catch you alone. his face was a mix of concern and frustration, his usual playful demeanor replaced by something more intense. “why have you been avoiding me?” he demanded, his voice carrying a weight of unspoken frustration. “and why are you setting me up with chaeyoung when you clearly know how i feel about you?”

his words hit you like a tidal wave, the force of his emotions crashing into your already turbulent heart. you were taken aback, stammering as you struggled to find the right response amidst the swirling chaos of your feelings. “i... i just needed some time,” you said, your voice cracking under the strain. “i don’t know what to do.”

beomgyu’s eyes softened, but his frustration remained. “what do you mean, you don’t know what to do? you’ve been avoiding me for days, and every time i try to talk to you, you shut me out. and now you’re pushing me toward chaeyoung? do you even realize how confusing this is?”

the words were like daggers, each one cutting deeper into the wound you’d been trying to hide. “it’s not that simple,” you said, your voice trembling. “i didn’t mean to lead anyone on. i’m just... i’m just trying to figure things out.”

before you could finish, chaeyoung, who had been lingering just outside the practice room, overheard the exchange. her face was a mix of hurt and anger as she stormed in, her eyes blazing with a mix of betrayal and indignation. “so this is what’s been going on?” she demanded, her voice echoing with pain. “you knew all along, didn’t you? and yet you kept pushing me toward beomgyu!”

you turned to face her, your heart breaking at the sight of her wounded expression. “chaeyoung, it wasn’t supposed to be like this. i didn’t mean to hurt you,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

chaeyoung’s eyes were glistening with unshed tears, her disappointment palpable. “you should’ve told me sooner instead of making me look like a fool! i thought we were friends. i didn’t know when it started, but now i do. you’ve put me in a horrible position.”

“i don’t even know when it started,” you admitted, your own tears spilling over. “i didn’t mean to keep it from you. i just... i didn’t know how to handle it.”

chaeyoung’s expression softened slightly, though the hurt in her eyes was still clear. “you know that i treasure you so much! i can live without him, but you... i’m disappointed.” you tried to hold her hand but she refuse it by pushing your hand away.

chaeyoung shook her head, her expression a mix of sadness and resolve. “i need some space,” she said, her voice shaking. “i can’t do this right now.”

as chaeyoung turned to leave, you felt a pang of guilt and helplessness. “please, chaeyoung, let’s talk later. i didn’t mean to hurt you,” you called after her, but she didn’t stop.

the room felt heavy with unresolved emotions as chaeyoung walked out, leaving you and beomgyu standing in the aftermath of the confrontation. you watched her leave, feeling a deep sense of regret and sorrow.

stepping out of the practice room, you almost collided with chaeyoung, who was standing just outside the door, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. your eyes met hers, and for a moment, the weight of everything that had happened seemed to hang between you.

“chaeyoung, wait,” you started, but she held up a hand, stopping you in your tracks.

“i need to be alone,” she said softly, her voice breaking. “just... stay away from me for now.”

you watched her walk away, your heart aching as the door closed behind her. the confrontation had left you feeling empty and lost, with the weight of your actions and their consequences pressing heavily on your shoulders. the path forward seemed unclear, and the pain of seeing both chaeyoung and beomgyu hurt by your choices was almost too much to bear.

the confrontation left you feeling bare and overwhelmed, as if the weight of your choices was pressing down on you. you were torn between listening to your mind, which urged you to stay away from the complications, and following your heart, despite the potential for more chaos. each option felt heavy with its own consequences, making the decision feel almost too much to bear.

on a painfully monday morning, thanks to your bothered sleep and blood-shot eyes from crying to sleep, yeonjun planned a meeting announcing the upcoming performance the band is going to be at, it’s for the school festival which is three weeks from now.

the days leading up to the big performance were a whirlwind of tension and emotional strain. the band’s rehearsals became increasingly fraught with unspoken conflicts. you and beomgyu found yourselves in the same space, but the atmosphere was thick with unresolved feelings. each practice felt like a tightrope walk between maintaining professionalism and confronting the personal problems between you.

you struggled to focus on the music. every note seemed to echo your inner confusion. the mere presence of beomgyu was a constant reminder of the kiss and the subsequent fallout. whenever practice ended, you would hastily pack up your things and slip out of the room before beomgyu had a chance to approach you. your heart raced as you made your way for the exit, desperate to escape the weight of the situation.

one evening, after an intense rehearsal, you were packing up your guitar when you felt beomgyu’s presence behind you. he cleared his throat, trying to get your attention. “hey, can we talk for a second?”

you stiffened, keeping your back turned. “i’m really sorry, beomgyu. i have to go.”

before he could respond, you grabbed your bag and quickly made your way to the door. you could hear his frustrated sigh as you exited the studio. you barely made it out into the hallway before you broke into a brisk walk, trying to put as much distance between you and the uncomfortable conversation.

the following day, during another practice, you could feel beomgyu’s gaze on you. his attempts to catch your eye were evident as he tried to gauge your mood. at one point, he caught up with you in the break room where you were refilling your water bottle.

“i don’t understand why you’re avoiding me,” beomgyu said, his voice filled with frustration. “we need to talk about what happened.”

you forced a tight smile, avoiding his eyes. “i know. but not right now. i really need to focus on the music.”

beomgyu’s expression hardened. “this isn’t just about the music anymore. it’s about us. you can’t keep running away.”

before he could say more, you turned and hurried back to the practice room, your heart pounding in your chest. you hoped that by diving back into the music, you could drown out the guilt and confusion that plagued you.

a few days later, after an exhausting rehearsal, you were again at the edge of the studio, packing up your gear. beomgyu approached you once more, his tone softer but still filled with a pleading urgency. “please, can we at least talk for a few minutes? it’s really important.”

you avoided his gaze, focusing intently on zipping up your bag. “i’m really tired, beomgyu. maybe another time?”

“we’ve been saying ‘another time’ for days,” he said, his voice rising slightly in frustration. “we can’t keep doing this.”

you didn’t answer, quickly slinging your bag over your shoulder and walking briskly toward the exit. you heard his footsteps behind you, but you didn’t slow down. the practice room door closed behind you with a decisive thud, leaving you alone in the hallway as you made your way out of the building, your breath coming in ragged bursts.

the tension reached a breaking point during a late-night practice session. as soon as the final chord was struck and the last note faded, you grabbed your things and tried to make another hasty exit. but beomgyu was waiting for you, his face set in a determined expression.

“this is getting ridiculous,” he said, stepping in front of the door as you tried to leave. “you can’t keep avoiding me forever.”

your pulse quickened, and you looked at him with a mix of frustration and sadness. “i don’t have the energy for this right now, beomgyu. just... let me go.”

“i can’t do that,” he said, his voice softer now. “we need to sort this out. it’s affecting the band, and it’s affecting us.”

you sighed, feeling the weight of his words. “i know. but every time we talk, it feels like it only makes things worse. is there even us?”

you saw how his emotion changed, his eyes became more soft with his eyebrows furrowed, and it almost crushed your heart into pieces. “t-then let’s just talk,” he said, stepping closer. “no pressure, just... honestly.”

you took a deep breath, feeling tears well up in your eyes. “i can’t. not yet. i’m still figuring things out.”

beomgyu’s face softened with concern. “please, don’t shut me out. i want to understand.”

with a heavy heart, you pushed past him and walked out of the studio. the cool night air hit your face as you hurried away, your mind a tangled mess of emotions. the sight of beomgyu standing alone in the doorway, his expression a mix of frustration and heartbreak, stayed with you long after you had left the building.

chaeyoung, meanwhile, had been distant and cold. the once easy trust of friendship between you had dissolved into a frosty silence. she avoided eye contact and kept conversations to a minimum, her demeanor a stark contrast to the warmth she had once shown. living together only added to the strain. each night, after band practice, you found yourself lingering on the school grounds until late, just to avoid the awkwardness of returning home to an increasingly strained atmosphere. the nights seemed endless as you waited for the right moment to return home, praying that somehow, things would resolve themselves.

one particularly chilly evening, around 9 pm, you were sitting alone on a bench near the school grounds. the practice had ended hours ago, and you were waiting for the right moment to head home, dreading the silent, uncomfortable atmosphere that awaited you. the dim streetlights cast long shadows on the deserted grounds, mirroring the isolation you felt.

you sighed deeply, your breath visible in the cold air. the empty grounds were a reflection of your emotional state—silent and still, waiting for something to change. you glanced at your watch, wishing time would move faster so you could escape the lingering anxiety.

as you sat lost in thought, yeonjun approached, his footsteps crunching on the gravel. he looked at you with a mix of concern and curiosity. “you’re still here?” he asked, taking a seat beside you without waiting for an invitation.

you shrugged, trying to mask your discomfort. “just needed some time to clear my head.”

yeonjun studied you for a moment, then spoke, his voice gentle but firm. “you know, this awkwardness between you and beomgyu is starting to affect the band. everyone can feel it, and it’s not just about the performance anymore.”

you sighed, feeling the weight of his words. “i know. i just... don’t know how to fix it.”

“maybe you should be true to yourself for once,” yeonjun suggested. “think about why you’re avoiding him. and don’t forget about chaeyoung. you two need to talk things through.”

his advice, though simple, resonated deeply. you nodded, taking his words to heart. “thanks, yeonjun. i’ll think about it.”

that night, determined to make amends, you decided to confront the situation head-on. after practice the next day, you went to a nearby store and bought two large bowls of chaeyoung’s favorite ramen. when you arrived home, the smell of the ramen filled the small apartment.

chaeyoung was sitting at the kitchen table, scrolling through her phone with a detached air. you placed the ramen on the table and took a deep breath. “i thought you might like this,” you said, trying to sound casual.

“what are you doing here.” she said, not even glancing towards you.

“i figured we have to talk..” you whispered, you voice breaking through each word.

chaeyoung looked up, her expression softening slightly as she took in the gesture. “make sure that it’s worth my time,” she said coldly, but there was a hint of vulnerability in her voice.

you sat down across from her, trying to maintain a hopeful smile. “i know things have been rough between us. i’m sorry for not being honest with you sooner.”

chaeyoung’s eyes softened as she stirred the ramen. “you know, i can deal with a broken heart. i’ve been through it before. what i can’t handle is losing you as a friend.”

the sincerity in her voice cut through your anxiety. “i didn’t want to hurt you. i was just trying to figure things out.”

chaeyoung sighed, her eyes meeting yours with a mixture of sadness and understanding. “i think you and beomgyu actually look good together. maybe you should give each other a try. i can handle another heartbreak, but losing you would be too much.”

the conversation opened the floodgates of emotion. you realized that chaeyoung valued your friendship above all else, and her willingness to support you despite the pain spoke volumes. you reached across the table and took her hand, the gesture a silent apology and an offer of reconciliation.

“that means a lot, chaeyoung,” you said softly. “thank you for being understanding.”

chaeyoung gave you a small, relieved smile. “i’m glad we talked. just... try not to let things get so complicated next time, okay?”

“i’ll do my best,” you promised, feeling a weight lift from your shoulders.

as the night wore on, the two of you found yourselves curled up together on your shared bed. the comforting warmth of her presence was a balm to your frayed nerves. you talked and laughed, reminiscing about old times, and the tension between you dissipated with each shared memory and whispered confession. it was a moment of healing, the rekindling of a cherished friendship that had weathered the storm.

one week before the performance, you began to feel a sense of relief. the conversations with yeonjun and chaeyoung had lifted a heavy burden, and you were attending band practices with renewed focus. though the anxiety about beomgyu still lingered, you were determined to sort through your feelings and confront whatever was next.

the last evening before the big performance, the practice session went smoothly. the room was filled with the familiar hum of instruments and the rhythm of music. throughout the practice, you and beomgyu exchanged furtive glances, a mix of unspoken emotions passing between you. the atmosphere was charged, but neither of you made the first move to bridge the gap.

as practice concluded, you told everyone you’d be quick and just needed to grab some water. when you returned to the band room, it was nearly empty. only yeonjun and taehyun remained, engaged in a low-key conversation. your heart sank as you realized beomgyu was nowhere to be seen.

as you picked up your bag, a folded piece of paper fell to the floor. you bent down and retrieved it, noticing a guitar pick tucked inside. unfolding the note, you saw beomgyu’s handwriting:

“i know you won’t listen to me, but i hope you will read my letters at least. —beomgyu”

confused, you glanced around, searching for beomgyu, despite know he was already gone. taehyun, observing your puzzled expression, spoke up. “i think there’s another note in your bag. beomgyu put a notebook there too.”

curiosity and worry surged through you, prompting you to dig through your bag. you discovered a notebook, its pages filled with beomgyu’s thoughts. the first entry was raw and revealing:

“i remember the first time i really noticed you. you were playing that red guitar of yours, your hair a bit messy, like you had just rolled out of bed. heheh (i actually think it looks good on you) there was something about the way you got lost in your music, so focused, so at ease with yourself. i couldn’t stop watching. i didn’t want to admit it, but that’s when i started paying attention.”

the next few entries showed beomgyu’s growing awareness of his feelings:

“i started finding excuses to be around you more. the way you’d smile after hitting a tricky chord, or how you’d cheer me on during my solos—it all started to matter a lot. i thought it was just a phase (lol), but the more i got to know you, the more it felt like something real.”

“then we had that night—the kiss. it was a mistake, or at least that’s what i tried to convince myself. but deep down, it felt like the start of something confusing and complicated. i wanted to fix things, but every time i tried, it seemed like i only made things worse.”

“now, with the performance coming up, i’m feeling this weight. i don’t know if we’ll have another chance to sort things out. it’s been hard trying to figure out how to make things right before we all move on. i just hope we can talk before it’s too late.”

your heart raced as you flipped to the last page. there, you found a sketch of a girl holding a red guitar. it was you, drawn with such detail and tenderness that it took your breath away. next to the sketch were lyrics:

“through the band, i discovered you i’m grateful for the music you appeared so unexpectedly with your red guitar in my studio and as you sang, i was instantly captivated i’ll write a song with you as its title the lyrics may not be ready but the melody comes first you’re the one i’ve been waiting for i’m ready to be genuine opening the door, i once believed, i couldn’t bear it any longer” - fuck, is it too cheesy? i don’t know… i just miss you.

the lyrics were written multiple times, with some lines crossed out and rewritten, showing how much thought beomgyu had put into them. the repeated attempts, the crossed-out words—everything spoke of his deep desire to get it right.

your heart thumped wildly in your chest as you absorbed the significance of his words and the heartfelt sentiment behind the song. tears welled in your eyes as you closed the notebook and looked at yeonjun and taehyun.

“where is he?” you asked, your voice trembling. “beomgyu, where is he?”

“who?” taehyun asked, clearly confused.

“beomgyu! where did he go?” you repeated, your urgency growing as tears began to spill.

“i believe he went home already,” yeonjun said.

“you can try to catch him; he’s a slow walker—” taehyun began, but before he could finish, you had already shoved the notebook back into your bag, grabbed your things, and bolted out of the room.

you raced through the dimly lit corridors, your breath coming in ragged gasps. you sprinted through the campus grounds, desperately searching for beomgyu. each second felt like an eternity as you scanned the area, hoping to catch a glimpse of him.

you ran to the usual places you thought he might be—the old practice rooms, the quiet spots near the campus park—but he was nowhere to be found. the night air was cool against your flushed face, but the chill did little to cool the fire in your chest.

your footsteps echoed in the empty streets, the rhythmic thud a reminder of your growing desperation. you crouched on the ground, the cold seeping through your clothes as you struggled to catch your breath. the thought of not having the chance to tell him about your feelings, of him giving you the letter as a closure to move on, weighed heavily on you. tears streamed down your face as you walked home, feeling utterly defeated.

when you finally arrived home, the weight of the night’s events seemed to settle heavily on your shoulders. the house was quiet, the kind of quiet that amplified every little noise and seemed to echo your disheartened thoughts. the door creaked open, and as you stepped inside, the emptiness of the space felt almost suffocating.

chaeyoung was waiting for you. she had sensed your distress even before you had the chance to say anything. without a word, she pulled you into a warm, comforting hug. her arms wrapped around you tightly, a silent gesture of support and understanding. you felt the warmth of her body, her comforting presence dissolving the tension that had built up inside you throughout the evening.

“hey,” she whispered softly, her voice a gentle balm to your aching heart. “it’s gonna be okay.”

you buried your face in her shoulder, the tears you’d been holding back finally breaking free. chaeyoung’s soothing words, combined with her embrace, were a small island of calm in the storm of emotions you were experiencing. the comfort she offered was genuine, and it helped to remind you that you didn’t have to face this alone.

chaeyoung held you for a long moment, allowing you to cry it out. her hand gently stroked your back, a rhythmic reassurance that she was there for you. “it’s alright,” she murmured, “we’ll figure it out. just breathe.”

the next morning, the day of the big performance, you woke up with a tangled mess of thoughts. the weight of the previous night pressed heavily on your mind, and the comfort of your bed felt like an irresistible temptation. you lay there, tangled in blankets, every fiber of your being urging you to stay in this cocoon of warmth and forget about everything.

but then chaeyoung’s voice cut through the haze of your thoughts, sharp and clear. “hey,” she said firmly, her voice breaking through the fog of indecision. “if this is the last time you’re going to see him, then fuck that and go! look at him all you can, don’t waste the chance. come on, i didn’t raise you like that.”

her words were a jolt, a wake-up call that pulled you from the comfort of denial and into the reality of the situation. chaeyoung’s unwavering resolve and concern for you pierced through your indecision, and you knew she was right. if this was the final chance to confront your feelings, you couldn’t waste it. you needed to be brave, even if it felt terrifying.

when you arrived at the venue for the final rehearsal, the atmosphere was charged with tension. the anticipation of the upcoming performance was palpable, but there was an undercurrent of unease that seemed to hover in the air. you glanced around the room, expecting to see the familiar faces of your bandmates, but there were only three of them present.

the absence of one crucial member was glaringly obvious. “where’s beomgyu?” you asked, your voice betraying your anxiety. the concern was evident in your tone, and your eyes scanned the room for any sign of him.

yeonjun looked up from where he was adjusting his equipment, his brow furrowed in frustration. “he’s not responding to our texts,” he explained. “so, we’ll have soobin as his proxy for now.”

“yeah, he’ll be late i guess,” kai added, trying to sound reassuring despite the clear concern in his voice. “we’re not sure what’s going on with him.”

you nodded, trying to push aside the worry gnawing at you. the rehearsal proceeded, but the empty space where beomgyu should have been felt like a void that you couldn’t ignore.

the rehearsal ended, and you found yourself backstage, preparing for your turn on stage. you sat on a bench, your fingers fidgeting with the edges of your clothing, the absence of beomgyu weighing heavily on your mind. the backstage area was bustling with activity, but your focus was entirely on the empty spot where he should have been.

the door to the backstage area swung open with a suddenness that made you look up. the familiar chorus of greetings and exclamations filled the space, but your attention was solely on the figure who had just entered. beomgyu stood in the doorway, his usual delicate eyes now showing a complex mix of emotions that you couldn’t quite interpret. his hair was styled the same as always, framing his face, but today it seemed as though he was carrying an invisible weight.

he was dressed in a black cardigan over a white polo, paired with a black tie, torn black shorts, and his signature chucky shoes. his guitar was slung casually over his shoulder, but it was clear that he was focused on something more than just the instrument.

the sight of him stirred a flurry of emotions inside you—hope, confusion, anxiety. the connection between you seemed visible, even though the tension in the air was almost tangible. beomgyu’s eyes locked onto yours for a moment, and it felt as though time itself had momentarily stopped.

the room seemed to hold its breath as the two of you stared at each other. for a fleeting instant, it felt as if everything else had faded away, leaving just the two of you and the weight of unspoken words hanging heavily between you.

beomgyu’s heart raced when he walked into the room, each step feeling heavier than the last. the sleepless night had left him utterly drained, and the weight of his apprehensions pressed down on him with every beat of his heart. he had spent hours pouring his feelings into the notebook, hoping it would be enough to bridge the gap between you. now, the fear that his words had fallen on deaf ears gnawed at him. the sight of you, barely meeting his gaze, made that fear even more tangible.

“sorry i’m late,” he said, his voice lacking its usual warmth and confidence. “i had trouble sleeping last night. i hope i didn’t mess things up too badly.”

hearing his words only made your heart ache more. was he thinking about you, too? the vulnerability in his voice made you wonder if he was struggling with his own feelings. but before you could delve deeper into your thoughts, the sound coordinator knocked on the door. “hey, you’re up next!” he called, breaking the moment.

the rush of adrenaline surged through you as you stood up, gripping your red guitar tightly. you took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart. this was it. you glanced over at beomgyu, who was talking to yeonjun, possibly explaining his late arrival.

“is everything okay with you?” yeonjun asked beomgyu, his tone laced with concern. “we’ve got just a bit of time before you go on.”

beomgyu nodded, though his expression was troubled. “yeah, just… needed to get my head straight. thanks for covering for me.”

you tried to push your swirling thoughts aside, focusing on the performance ahead. backstage, the crew hurriedly prepared the equipment, adjusting microphones and checking amplifiers. you spotted chaeyoung in the audience, her encouraging smile offering a small boost of confidence. you could see her giving you a thumbs-up, and it made you feel a bit more grounded.

as you took your place on stage, you could feel beomgyu’s eyes on you, even as you busied yourself with setting up your gear. his presence was almost palpable, adding to your already heightened nerves.

the introduction song started, the energetic beat filling the venue. the crowd’s applause and cheers created a vibrant atmosphere. yeonjun stepped up to the mic, his voice clear and upbeat as he began introducing the band members.

the setlist progressed smoothly, each song blending seamlessly into the next with transitions that kept the crowd energized. the band’s performance was electric, and the audience’s enthusiasm was noticeable. but as the performance reached the last few songs, yeonjun announce that there will be last two song on the list, you noticed something odd. there was a mix-up in the setlist. you were sure that only one song was left—the one you and beomgyu had written together.

but before you even get lost on your mind the drum sticks signaled the start of the final song, your thoughts snapped back to the stage. kai had stopped playing the keyboard and held the mic ready, his expression serious yet excited.

the lyrics began to flow through the venue, each word resonating deeply within you:

unnoticed, the noises around us fade away, is it obvious that there's something one of us wants to admit? as time passes, we don't realize that only we remain here. our eyes meet, yearning to say, you take my heart to the heavens, giving me a joy that feels true. there's nothing more to seek; you are mine, and i am yours, and here we lose ourselves. time has flown by, and we haven't even noticed that only we remain. our eyes meet, yearning to say, you take my heart to the heavens, giving me a joy that feels true. there's nothing more to seek; you are mine, and i am yours, and here we lose ourselves. we lose ourselves in each other. we lose ourselves in each other.

as kai sang, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from beomgyu. the spotlight cast soft shadows on his face, highlighting the familiar contours you had come to know so well. each lyric of the song seemed to resonate with memories of your time together, drawing you into a whirlpool of recollections.

you remembered those late-night practice sessions, the room filled with the soft strum of guitars and the clinking of coffee cups. you and beomgyu would lose track of time, laughing over missed notes and exchanging knowing glances. one night, as the clock ticked past midnight, beomgyu had paused his playing and looked over at you.

“why do we always end up here?” he’d asked, a smile tugging at his lips. “it’s like our own little world.” you’d grinned, nodding in agreement. “maybe it’s because we can just be ourselves here. no need to pretend.”

you thought about the meals you’d shared after exhausting rehearsals, grabbing quick bites from a local convenience store. you’d both been too tired to care about anything more than satisfying your hunger, but those moments had been filled with genuine conversation and laughter.

“remember that time we tried to make our own ramen?” beomgyu had said, chuckling as he sipped his cup noodles. “we thought it would be a culinary masterpiece.”

you had laughed, shaking your head. “more like a disaster in a cup.”

and those small, intimate moments when it was just the two of you. Like that one afternoon in the practice room when you had both been too tired to play. you’d ended up sprawled on the floor, talking about everything and nothing.

“sometime i think,” beomgyu had mused, “that we don’t need to say much to understand each other. it’s like we already know what the other is thinking.”

“yeah,” you’d replied, “sometimes silence speaks louder than words.”

now, as kai’s voice wrapped around the final lines of the song, you felt a wave of resolve wash over you. the lyrics spoke of that intangible bond, the silent connection that defied explanation.

you couldn’t ignore these feelings any longer. the song’s message, combined with your shared experiences, had made your decision clear. you were going to confess your feelings to beomgyu, no matter how terrifying it felt. you tightened your grip on your guitar, your heart pounding in your chest. it was now or never.

when the final chord resonated through the venue and the crowd erupted into cheers, the noise seemed to amplify the storm inside you. yeonjun stepped up to the mic, his voice full of energy.

“this next song was a collaboration between our very own beomgyu and y/n,” he announced, a proud smile on his face. “it’s about the things we can’t always put into words, the unspoken connection that binds two people together. it’s about finding a way to express what words alone can’t capture.”

the spotlight shifted to you and beomgyu, illuminating the space between you. in that brief moment, your eyes met, and a wave of fear and excitement washed over you. beomgyu’s gaze was intense, filled with a mix of curiosity and something you couldn’t quite place.

you took a deep breath, your resolve hardening. this was your chance to be honest, to put everything on the line. you were going to confess your feelings to beomgyu, no matter what.

after the last song, the lights in the auditorium abruptly cut off, plunging the space into darkness. a murmur of confusion swept through the crowd as you fumbled to make out shapes in the dimness. the auditorium, being a closed area, seemed to amplify the darkness. but just as quickly as the lights had gone out, they flickered back on, casting a bright, almost blinding light over the stage.

you blinked, adjusting to the sudden brightness. and there, standing in the middle of the stage, was beomgyu. he was wearing taehyun’s guitar and adjusting the standing mic with a mixture of nervousness and determination. he cleared his throat, his voice resonating through the microphone.

“hello, i’m beomgyu,” he began, his tone holding a rare softness. “the band’s bassist. i don’t sing a lot on sets,” he paused, a shy chuckle escaping him as he rubbed the back of his neck. “i have a special set, uh... for a special someone.”

the words seemed to hang in the air, and you could see his eyes flicker in your direction before he turned back to the crowd. his hands began to strum the guitar, and an unfamiliar melody started to fill the auditorium. it was different from the usual songs he played, and though you’d heard him sing before, this was something deeply personal.

he kept stealing glances at you, his fingers dancing over the strings with a mix of vulnerability and hope. the room seemed to narrow down to just the two of you as he sang the first verse:

“through the band, i discovered you…”

the song's lyrics were hauntingly familiar, echoing the melody from the last page of the notebook. the realization hit you like a wave, and you felt your heart race. the notebook, the lyrics—it was all coming together in this intimate performance.

as he sang, every word seemed to cut through the chaos of your thoughts. the lyrics spoke of unspoken feelings, of discovering something precious through shared moments. the melody wove a story of connection and understanding, each note filled with emotion.

you wiped away the tears that had started cascading down your cheeks. your heart felt like it was being tugged by an invisible force, leading you to move. your feet seemed to act on their own, carrying you toward beomgyu as if guided by the sincerity in his song.

the crowd’s noise faded into the background as you approached him. beomgyu’s eyes locked onto yours as he strummed the final chords, his expression a mix of relief and nervous anticipation. you saw him begin to walk toward you, but before he could close the distance, you ran, your legs propelling you forward in a desperate bid to reach him.

you threw your arms around him in a tight embrace, and in that moment, the world felt like it had stopped. it was just the two of you, standing in the center of the stage, with your hearts speaking louder than any words could.

“it’s the same lyrics…” you whispered, your voice trembling. “the same as what you wrote on the last page…”

beomgyu’s breath was warm against your forehead. “you read it…” he said softly, his voice filled with a mixture of relief and vulnerability.

“of course i did,” you replied, your forehead resting against his. his eyes softened, and before he could say another word, you leaned in and captured his lips with yours. the kiss was a fusion of all the feelings you had kept bottled up, a silent confession that needed no words.

when you finally pulled back, breathless, beomgyu’s cheeks were flushed a deep red. “t-there are people watching…” he whispered, his voice laced with embarrassment.

the realization hit you like a splash of cold water. the crowd’s cheers and laughter had reached a crescendo, and your bandmates were all staring at you with amused expressions.

“oh, fuck it,” you said, a determined smile spreading across your face. you grabbed beomgyu’s hands tightly, the warmth of his touch grounding you. you looked at him with a mixture of mischief and resolve before starting to run.

the two of you sprinted toward the backstage exit, hand in hand, the noise of the crowd and the teasing laughter of your bandmates fading behind you. as you pulled beomgyu along, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of exhilaration. this was your moment, and no one could take it away from you.

gyo's note: this is by far the longest one i've written, this idea came to my mind when i rewatched the movie 20th century girl and when i tell u i had 2-3 business days of grieving over it and that's when the idea of heartstrings started. it was also heavily inspired with the song MRT and Lia, so if you guys would like to, you can check them out for yourself (it's a good song, and the exact song i used for lyrics part, i just translated it into english) ++ i love me a bassist!beomgyu actually anything that beomgyu does :<< i think i'm smitten you guys (sighs) this note is longer than i expected so i'll end this here by saying that i have a new story idea, a series actually, for yeonjun and soobin yayyy ^^ please like and reblog, it helps my works to have more engagement, and if you made it to this part, thank you so much for reading. you will be loved, xoxo!

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