#at least what I feel is love
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Love tastes
I remember tasting love, my mother loved spicy food and I hated it, the spices all burning my mouth, I learned to love it due to my love for mom.
My big brother always picked fresh raw radishes to eat from my grandparents house, eating it raw wasn’t the best flavour but I accepted the challenge, if only I could share it one last time with him.
We have a stolen recipe book from the 90’ my dad took it from a Italian restaurant in manhattan, he prepared mushroom soup when we first meet, I have never been one for fancy tastes, but I learned to distinguish and appreciate every single five stars dish that was served to me.
My first love was kind of a nerd, gushing about stuff from comics, to tv, and electronics, always with a smile that made me feel hopeless, we talked over the table about trying wasabi together and how it the sashimi would taste like, our time together was cut short, and I cry a little every time I eat a spoonful of wasabi, I would do it again if only to them smile at me again.
Love is learning to taste it and remember it, keeping it close to your heart, your tongue and your mind, I would have never tasted or remember any love if it wasn’t because of them, I’ll eat with them the food, if not only for the sake of good times.
#vent post#ask to tag#it’s 3:30 am#love#at least what I feel is love#i’m hungry#and sleepy#I’m very very sad
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in spite of everything, I had fun <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushikugi#jjk 271#well we made it :'>#im kind of ignoring a lot of the tag rn ghsdff ik people are upset#if u follow me u know th full extent of my thoughts on the wrapping up of the series but tl;dr the caption says it all#this series meant a lot to me and im working on a bigger tribute to fully express that love and gratitude#but take a redraw 2 tide u over for now#im just so happy. its bittersweet but those r my kids n theyre tgt and theyre okay#i think the return to normalcy is good fr them. i say let them rest n b together n process everything in time#/i'm/ satisfied with what i got out of jjk as a whole and that's all that matters to me#however ik that not everyone shares tht sentiment n thats valid!#regardless of how u feel abt the finale i hope that u at least take time to remember things abt the series that brought u joy#thats all i can say#oh yeah anyway i lightened up megumi's expression his face is so funny in that panel i can't believe he really said -_- until the very end#still tho i think megu deserves a content lil smile
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...Turns out gay sex actually was the solution.
(This is basically a redraw, come read the real deal over at Tiger Tiger)
#tiger tiger#jamis arlesi#arno#I like to think Arno meant that as an inside thought but it came out as an outside thought. He's rolling with it though.#He did cause a Catastrophic Yaoi event though.#Jamis my beloved. You have the heart of a maiden. The body of an Ox. The brain of a loyal dog.#This is a guy who's okay being attracted to another man but *NOT* aware he's in love or that he's bisexual.#We love him for this. My god. This man is crafted so perfectly. I need you all to at least give Tigers a chance for *him*.#I'm tricking you a little bit because you will actually also fall for Ludo and Luck and Remy and Honeyfoot and-#okay you get the point. There are so many amazing characters in this comic.#I just.. my joke comic of 'gay sex is the solution' feels so ominous now knowing a few weeks later that was going to be canon.#I feel like a jester and a prophet. I don't know if I should tell anymore jokes in fear of what I may predict.#I am putting my hands together for Ludo to get a good smooch in with [redacted] in dragon form.#Also predicting something very spooky is going to go down with the diving bell. We shall see!
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Edwin after the confession is a menace
Bonus Charles being normal about it:
#payneland#edwin x charles#dead boy detectives#dbda#give a man a warning Edwin smh#what is he doing anyway? is it on purpose? he just can't help himself now thta he accepted his feelings? he just likes saying it?#not even he know methinks#honestly charles should hear how loved he is often#i think edwin would agree#also I think it would be funny if they had to deal with a specific kind of creature at least once a year#i picked the church grim because there truly are a lot of stories about them#and it felt fitting
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I swapped them around in a silly doodle
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#Vasco! what have they done to you?!#he finally caught the skrunklies#it's contagious#or maybe there's something horribly wrong with the ambient pressure and he's not agreeing with it at all#it's jarring that (at least to me) both Machetes read as Machete they're the opposite ends of the Machete spectrum#his form oscillates between an exposed nerve and a unicorn I get it#but swapped Vasco is#a whole new mystery critter#actually he's kind of cute#I would take him home#give him a bath in the sink and feed him some grilled chicken maybe that'll make him feel more like himself#real Vasco is toasted to perfection this one looks burnt at the edges and raw in the middle#I love his little off-model sheep ear#couldn't even keep his glorious floppers poor boy#gift art#foilthepiglin#own characters#Machete#Vasco
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Silly body not enjoying being out and socializing for more than a few hours. *shakes fist at sky* CURSE YOU FEIND-
#we enjoy a lil projection here and there uvu#but also i feel like he prolly has at least a lil of it considering how much time he spends in his lab <3#(this totally wasnt yet another excuse to draw cozy disaster twin times QwQ; )#I love them what can i say uvu#rottmnt#rottmnt comic#rottmnt fanart#rottmnt leo#rottmnt donnie#disaster twins#rottmnt disaster twins#unpause rottmnt#tribbleart#<3
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Older Sylus as actual dad 😭👌✨
#u can't tell me he doesn't sound like divorced dad who tried his best to reconnect with his daughter & care her on her cramp clumsily#love and deepspace#at least it is until the part he started the massage; tbh only after i think of him as a dad that his charm point increases for me#i just feel the whole thing with sylus is weird like it is kinda forced that he is overly affectionate as the bad guy#love and deepspace fanart#lads fanart#fanart#love and deepspace sylus#love and deepspace mc#love and deepspace kieran#love and deepspace luke#love and deepspace zayne#sylus#luke#kieran#zayne#lads zayne#lads sylus#lads luke#lads kieran#lads mc#i want him olderr damnit!!! make him actual mafia father#fshdh the way he made small talk about the blanket was so dad#and the way he clumsily talk about the sugar is so dad#what the hellll HE is SooooOOooo daaaddd..........#plsss adoopt my MC and stop being flirty with me (impossible)#sorry guys i don't want to date sylus i want older him to become mc's adoptive dad dot png
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Prompt 261
“So is no one going to talk about the eldritch space child or…”
“I mean, do you want to get between a child and Batman? I think the only one who could even get close right now is Superman…”
“No you’re right, I think- oh my god the eldritch space child is playing with batman’s bat-ears and he’s not doing anything about it what the fuck I thought only Robins could get away with that-”
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Alfred is Clockwork#AndCW having adopted Danny means Danny gets to meet his new big brother from another timeline#Bruce (Once Alfred confirms) is absolutely attached within moments#Autistic bois unite & talk for hours about hyperfixations#Clark has had time to make an entire homemade pie at this point#No Danny isn’t ghost king nor is Clockwork Cronus#Bruce: I have only had a baby brother for 5 hours but if anything happens to him I will let my kids break all the rules & kill everyone her#Signal: Yeah definitely Alfred’s he glows like him and everything#The rest of the bats: Alfred does what now-#Danny with dozens of big star eyes to Bruce: How would you feel about sisters#Bruce holding 3 children & 1 young adult: I am big brother now#Alfred scathingly says that Someone in the family *cough Jazz cough* will at least finish college & get their degree#Sometimes CW enjoys turning off his future-vision and vibing as a mostly-mortal#And Gotham is an old war buddy of his (Yes Gotham is the city equivalent of an Ancient) from the [Redacted] era of the Realms#And xer son & daughter are adorable- Bludhaven & Arkham love the vigilantes lots
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cas would not kiss dean first. dean would also not kiss cas first. this is their tragedy. but a shapeshifter or some kind of monster clone or djinn dream would initiate the first kiss and they would 100% return it. or the real dean and cas would've just simply fallen together somehow like tripped and fell and gravity would bring their mouths together whoops anyway they'd both take it from there - and that's not fate pulling strings it's just dumb luck for these two dumbasses (affectionate)
#destiel#thoughts#and btw: i don't know why everyone thinks i'm trying to woobify cas by saying he wouldn't kiss dean first.#fact: dude literally waited for death's door to confess his love so he wouldn't burden dean with his feels - but at least he could#use them to save dean. and he thought he couldn't have dean (the one thing he wanted..) which is why he didn't make the first move#bc he thought there would be no further moves. i don't understand what's not clicking. anyway they're both dumbasses#don't bother fighting me i know i'm right
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Kinda want to write a Spock POV post-fal-tor-pan fic where Spock sees Jim and is instantly whammed with the fact that he's in love with him, but still has no idea why or what that means, so he just goes around with a knot of love tangled in his mind, utterly baffled as to why it's there or how to figure it out. He can't ask the kolinahr adepts, because it feels un-vulcan, so instead he's just. confusedly pining the entire time.
Jim smiles sappily at him and Spock's like "My Heart Is Beating Faster. Why Is My Heart Beating Faster. There Is No Cause For My Heart To Be Beating Faster. Do I Have Tachycardia."
Spock, to McCoy: Doctor, is there history of heart disease in my family?
Bones, suspicious: Yes? Why? (already surreptitiously scanning Spock w/ a tricorder)
Spock: I have noticed concerning irregularities in my heart beat. They occur primarily around Admiral Kirk.
Bones, freezing: Repeat that for me, Spock?
Spock: I have noti-
Bones: No, not that, the next bit! Where they happen!
Spock: Ah. Around Admiral Kirk.
[FIVE MINUTES LATER]
Spock, annoyed: Doctor, cease laughing. I fail to understand what part of my medical condition you find so amusing.
Bones, still wheezing with laughter: Don't - don't you worry your little head about it, Spock. You're not sick, that's the important thing. (interrupts himself by laughing again) You'll (wheeze) figure it out eventually.
(Spock, disgruntled, gives up on him and leaves.)
(McCoy keeps laughing for another ten minutes.)
#*sprays myself with water* stop. bad fool. no starting new projects until you have finished at LEAST two old projects#me taking the inherent angst of “post-resurrection memory loss” and saying “but what if we get silly with it”#he's been alive for two blinks and doesn't know what love is but boy howdy is he feeling it#probably to keep the lighter tone we can assume that kirk doesn't actually realize that spock doesn't remember that they were married#he's just like “my husband is alive again!!! <3<3<3”. he is unaware that spock has zero knowledge OR that spock is pining pathetically#so kirk is being Soft and supportive to spock knowing that he needs time to come back to terms with his emotions while spock is ??<3??#kirk thinks that they're on the same page about mending their relationship. while spock has no idea there WAS one Or that he Wants one#spock: jim has invited me to dinner once again. my heartrate increased due to both the invitation and admiral kirk's proximity.#the meaning of this is unclear. i may be ill. i have no desire to limit my interactions with the admiral however. therefore i shall attend.#kirk: i'm going on a date with my husband!!!!! <3<3<3 who is cute and flustered all the time because his mind is a little fuzzy!! <3<3#tos#star trek movies#tsfs#star trek#star trek the original series#star trek the search for spock#james t kirk#spock#spirk#k/s#bones mccoy
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Tell me great things…
I look into the distance, looking over a cathedral in the rooftop of a building, I feel myself weep in silence, and a weight becomes heavier as someone leans on my shoulder.
“I thought you were not interested” said in a whisper, and I couldn’t be more surprised, how is it that he believes that, to be uninterested in the best person in this planet?, and the mere thought of it was wild enough to make me speak in a try to clear things.
“I simply believed that I was hindering you, and I’m not that great as s partner, you could get someone better…someone not dying” I said, as it was true, I’m just a human without destiny, killing myself by the torture of living, it was in these moments were I felt the most alive being within the vicinity of him, but no matter how much I felt alive with him, I felt dead in life and career, maybe with my family as well.
“You cannot seriously think that, I loved you so much, and you are not dead, and will not die any day soon” he said as he lifted his head from my shoulder.
“I loved you so much that I felt hopeless, it’s like a punch in the gut, so hard that leaves you breathless, it’s electricity in my brain where you leave me dumb and my personality changes, and it’s a rope that on my neck that I can’t help but like as I unknowingly slave myself to your service” and that was it, the words that I have been searching the last 10 years come to me, with the greatest description of my feeling.
“…and it’s not something I can change, not now, not ever” I say as tears slowly start falling from my face.
And I can feel the weight of his gaze, maybe he can see the pathetic being that I was reduced to by loving too much, is this what Icarus felt, with great wings that shone and flew so fast and were reduced to melted wax, maybe this was it for me, a strong loyalty and a great knight, until I tied my soul up, and I was left a useless shell of that strong and happy being.
He looks at me with a conflicted expression and it breaks my heart to see him like this, fretting over my well being, and this stupid slave knight reaches within for a clown to entertain the king, no sadness now, no sadness for him, I may be useless but I can’t let him be more concerned about me.
“But that’s too sad to say, and I don’t feel like putting a sad tone to our afternoon” I look at him, those two pieces of sun that shine so bright within his eyes look at me, and with a smile I continue my charade.
“What if we go for a couple coffees down the street and sit in the plaza?” I ask while he looks up at me, and I glance at his lips, and that messy hairstyle, maybe that sharp jawline, and I see him think about it.
“It’s not a date right?” He asks, oh and how much I would like to say yes to that question, but I can’t, and also I would hate to lie to that sweet voice.
“It’s an outing, wether you want it to be a date or not, I’ll leave that to you” I say as I wink to him in a teasing voice, it’s the most truthful as well as amusing trick I can pull, not that I’m avoiding the question or anything.
“I…I will go for my jacket, we gotta get out of the rooftop first” he stutters a little and I can see him look the other way, we get out of the rooftop and I smile slightly, grateful that he can’t see me blush, and what a painful experience that gives me a little bit of hope that things will work out.
We walk to his bedroom and look for our respective jackets, black and white, we slowly make our way down the big house until we get on our way to the plaza.
“So how much has everything changed while I was gone?” I ask him with a curious look.
“Not much really, but maybe it’s because it’s from my point of view” he shrugged, and the sunset can be seen getting farther and farther, while his cinnamon skin shines like gold on the sun.
“Huh, well then, tell me the important stuff or the good stuff” I say, trying to get out of the distraction of my yellow flower shining, and I do this little nervous tic with my hands, hopefully unnoticed.
“Well the I will tell you great things” he says with a tone of playfulness, and oh how that traps me further into his clutches.
“Well then my liege, tell me the greatest things from your life as of now” I bow slightly in a dramatic funny tone, a slight blush becomes alive in my cheeks and a fondness makes it’s way into my voice.
“Well for starters the greatest thing that happened as of late is…..”
Oh how much I have fallen, I doomed myself and didn’t really cared, how vile of me and toxic to indulge.
#ask to tag#vent post#i need therapy#it’s 3:30 am#i need sleep#short story#tw sucidal ideation#love story#at least what i feel is love#i love him#unrequited love#question mark
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big fan of panels where they look like they wld beat me up
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuuji#megumi#YUUJI WILL NOT COOPERATE TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME >:(((#is it the angle ? is it the expression?? the bangs??????? am i just a fraud and a fake yuuji liker i dont know at this point#god#just . just take it i cant fiddle with the proportions any more ill go insane#it was worse when i tried colouring it but im STILL not 100% sold on it no matter what i shift or tilt#megumi my darling boy i love u at least You always have my back :'<#honestly my leading theory is that bc my yuuji design looks objectively More different than his canon design#its more prone 2 looking Wrong in my head#but even so !!! if i *have* my yuuji design down why does it still feel like im fighting fr my gd life when i try 2 draw him#it feels like he is shattering my drawing hand and smiling at me n taunting me w those shiny puppy eyes th entire time#head in hands I Don't Get It#when will i get it#anyway scoreboard yuuji: 623453766235 hina: 0
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whatever happens, please don’t break
#god not a fucking DAY goes by where i don’t think of that one interview and this quote#does anybody have it word for word? please? i’ll pay you#literally every single time i think about how kunikida as w character was MADE for dazai. specifically to share his suffering#i actually sob into my hands because that means they were both destined for tragedy together and the long dark road they will walk#will at least not be lonely. because they have each other. they are each other’s light in the darkness.#DO YOU UNDERSTAND#bro the fact that kunikida is painfully aware of the imperfection of the world and how he still continues to fight for his ideals#paralleling dazai who finds humanity beautiful but cannot become attached bc he feels alienated from emotion#THE WAY THEY COULD HELP EACH OTHER????? SICK SICK SICK I AM SICK#i love kunikidazai sm i wish more ppl could see the potential#but some of you aren’t ready for the sheer perfection of their dynamic#also i’ve noticed that i am only capable of drawing dazai properly when it’s with kunikida what’s up with that 💀#and sorreyy i know their height difference isn’t THAT big but i didn’t realize until i was halfway into the coloring 😔💔#osamu dazai#dazai osamu#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#lotus draws
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V: Not that I’m broke. Because I know where to come if I’m broke.
D: Thank you for buying merchandise at shop.danielhowell.com so that I can pay for my grandma’s…total body workout.
Hard to overstate how much I adore this whole this (saved the parasocial for the tags)
#all the years she seems to have been such stability for him#and now he can be stability for her#and she knoooows it she knows he’ll prop up her lifestyle she knows she’s got a richass grandson#and he buys her nice things and surely pays for the trips they take#and they just have such a sweet hilarious dynamic their dry humor seems so similar b#and the love is so palpable#and I just am tickled by thinking about when he got wealthy enough to be able to financially support his gran#that that’s what he did#at least enough for her to feel comfortable making this comment :)#also he looks sooooo pleased about it#also sorry to be toxic but lowkey hot of him to know he’s that rich bitch#Dan and Phil#Dan Howell#me yapping
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One Piece Live action season 1 + hints or similarities to future One Piece moments (specifically after East Blue saga) - part 1: episodes 1-3
This wasn't meant to be a comparison between the live action and the animanga, but more so seeing these added/modified scenes that differ from the manga, yet with some of the acting/writing includes clues and hints to different and future canon material, or even characterization that necessary doesn't fit East Blue yet, but fits well enough into later arcs.
Luffy not knowing his world directions both in Opla (ep 1) /// Skypiea arc, in anime ep 168. But it could be for honestly any other arc (Funny thing is, in Opla he rang the bell that unfortunately alerted Alvida's crew, and only when I was rewatching that scene it made me connect it with the great Luffy moment at the end of Skypiea.)
The matches that Zoro has on the Island of Sixis in Opla ep 1, possibly manufactured on Baldimore (?), with a name Beast of Baldimore. /// After Sabaody Archipelago Franky was sent to Baldimore by Kuma, finding Vegapunk's homeland and laboratory, and also developing more of his science projects, as well as causing funny incidents, such as the Burning Beast. (It has probably nothing to do with the matches, except for the 'tiger on fire' motif and the name of Baldimore, but the details of Opla are just so fun!)
Zoro's first meeting with Luffy in Opla episode 1 is really different but fun nonetheless, especially with wording of the line that he doesn't want to 'play pirates' with Luffy. It's such a great setup line for his development to truly be one of the very first to understand how much Luffy means everything he's doing /// Zoro in ep. 323 Post Enies Lobby arc, making sure both his crew and the audience know how seriously he takes being part of Luffy's crew and what it means for future arcs.
Opla ep 2, Luffy mentioning Shanks' way of thinking about fighting (or not fighting someone who's not worth it) /// ep. 146 Jaya arc, Luffy saying to Zoro not to fight Bellamy's crew, which was direct influence from Shanks not fighting the Mountain bandits in the first chapters of the manga. It's interesting that for both of these scenes both Zoro and Nami are there to hear this.
This is just a fun bit, but seeing Nami excited about having a bath was cute. Opla ep 3 /// anime ep. 326, just after they get Sunny and everyone was finding out what space there is for them.
Garp and Koby playing the game of Go, Opla ep 3 /// CP0 agents playing Go while discussing the outcome of Strawhats & Oden's crew's raid on Onigashima against Kaido. It seems like a game that maybe Marines play more/enjoy (?) & above, up to CP ranks.
Usopp 'retelling' a story about eating a dragon, Opla ep 3 /// Punk Hazard ep 580, Zoro killing the dragon and planning with Luffy what's the best way to cook and eat it. Lol. In next chapters Luffy was carrying a big chunk of it, seemingly ate a bit part of the dragon already.
This one is self explanatory. Zoro is so gone for Luffy in Opla it's insane. Every time I remember that I get emo. ep 3. /// One of the first really fond smiles that Zoro keeps smiling at Luffy, a mixture of proud and understanding how Luffy works. ep 63, but it's just so much better in the manga, just look at it. Smitten™ (ch. 104)
#i had a great idea to rewatch opla now that im caught up with one piece and this is what i came up with OTL im so tired#so at least posting part 1 and later will work on the rest#one piece#one piece live action#opgraphics#oplaedit#monkey d. luffy#roronoa zoro#nami#usopp#franky#zolu#luzo#romance dawn trio#onepieceedit#gif:opla#mine#gif:one piece#gif:op anime#its actually really interesting to go back to what brought me to the manga. like nothing can really show the way its portrayed in the manga#but opla is doing a great job in making somethign new out of what we know and love#with different light on certain things. different angles and scenes pushed a bit around. but in the end i feel it makes perfect sense#for the story it's trying to tell on its own. for who these characters are too. *cough. youre my captain and im your first mate*
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thank you for a great art fight! here's some of my final attacks. had a blast, already missing it - see you next year!
#my art#art fight#artfight#artfight2024#anthro#monster#furry#genuinely already missing it i always feel a bit empty for the first few days after art fight ends#it takes up SO much of my free time in july nowadays like july is just the art fight month. to me#hoping to fill the void by doing something that's been eating away at me for years at this point#which is to start taking some of my oc projects more seriously.....and start developing them into something...#i know i can (probably) never make money off my ocs but i think i will start eating my hands off if i don't try to tell their stories#all fun and games but also it's like an obsession 2 me i love my characters....i love them...#and unfortunately i most love my least marketable characters#but whatever i'm sure there will be a couple people who care#feel like i'm at a crossroads and i'm picking the least desirable path but also there's some release in that....#i need to follow that advice that's like make art for yourself and five other likeminded freaks#anyway i'm rambling.....again....it's what i do in the tags
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