#at least until it's revealed in the actual storyline

[baskeigh-ball]

this might be a stupid question but, what exactly did Splinter do to the MM!trio? you’ve mentioned in both Don and Leo’s redesigns (both of which look awesome btw) how they feel about his ‘past actions’

is it just referring to his neglect, or did something else happen?

sorry again if this is a dumb question, or if you’ve already answered this. im just confused jsjabjs

No worries, I've been vague-posting about it and never really explained so you're definitely not alone lol, explanation under the cut as usual (warning, it's a bit long)

So I'm very interested in the headcanon that Splinter went through depressive episodes while trying to raise the turtles, and as a result neglected them by being emotionally absent, which could be technically canon based off how they characterized him in early episodes and various bits of dialogue?

I don't wanna jump the gun and say it's true to the show but there's hints here and there that he wasn't the most emotionally present parent (the fact Donnie has never had positive reinforcement from an adult and never spends time with Splinter, the fact Leo assumes he's the least favorite, Raph's entire conflict in the season 2 finale being burdened with too much responsibility, Mikey basically being the family therapist in place of, oh idk a parental figure, etc). Anyways, canon or not it's a legitimate thing in this AU.

Once the trio was old enough to look after themselves, Splinter fully fell into his depression and barely did anything around the lair. He would go days without leaving his room, not eating or doing anything, practically comatose in bed. His depression definitely wasn't helped with the way he lost Raph right after escaping Draxum's lab. I said it once, I'll say it again: survivor's guilt is a bitch

But the longest (and last) time he ever did so was when the turtles were 9-10 (Mikey 9, the twins 10). He completely isolated himself and left them to survive on their own for two weeks. Which doesn't sound that long, but it wasn't like they had two weeks' worth of food stocked up, not to mention the necessary upkeep around the lair. Leo and Donnie made it work, all while doing their best to keep Mikey happy, but it really took a toll on their trust in Splinter. After that, Splinter slowly made a recovery and has spent years doing his best to make it up to them. Leo appreciates it, Mikey acknowledges it, Donnie ignores it. But even now, nobody has yet to actually discuss the incident beyond surface-level apologies.

All in all, the fam is Not Okay but refuses to acknowledge it. I don't wanna get into too many details though, because a bunch of this stuff is gonna be talked about in either the fic or comic parts as they come out. Hope this cleared up any confusion :]

[dykesynthezoid]

I do think we’re getting at least some escalation of devil’s minion in s3 btw. And I don’t think that’s even me being hopeful or optimistic I think it’s literally just logical.

I’ve seen people say oh, but devil’s minion happens in QOTD, and s3 is TVL; and firstly, they’ve definitely made it sound like some elements of queen of the damned are going to be present in s3. Secondly, I suspect season 3 is going to end with the lead up to Lestat’s San Francisco concert. So the whole season will be both Lestat backstory + the set up for the events of QOTD. And devil’s minion happens, guess what, before Lestat’s San Francisco concert. It would almost not make sense to not at least touch on it while the other story beats are culminating up to that moment. Like, Daniel and Armand are already present in the story (where they aren’t in the book in the modern day storyline), why would you not continue their storylines to the next logical step?

Also, I think you have to consider just how many new characters and storylines QOTD introduces and how daunting that can be to absorb if you’re unfamiliar. Waiting to do anything with devil’s minion until season 4 means that’s just one more new storyline to have to inject into a narrative already very crowded with exposition. It just doesn’t make a lot of sense to do that, and I suspect the writers are pretty aware of that.

And frankly like. What other storylines would Daniel and Armand be getting? Like how are either of their stories supposed to move forward without, y’know, each other? Are we supposed to expect all of season 3 just to be one big pause button on both their larger narratives? That seems very silly. Daniel at least has the journey of adjusting to vampirism, but Armand especially is like. His semi-redemption and character evolution comes from devil’s minion. That’s the only real next step for him.

And I mean. Look at Assad and Eric. I don’t think Rolin Jones could convince them to wait a whole other season for something to happen if he tried. I know, I know it’s easy to be like “oh but maybe it’s just actors being silly” but compare how open they’re being about it now and how much more tight lipped they were in between seasons one and two. It’s night and day. It is a very very different vibe. And apparently, Assad has been plenty excited about it this entire time, so he was actually somehow managing to keep his mouth shut before. But now maybe he doesn’t need to, because he knows season 3 will at least offer something in the way of that development.

I think it’s entirely possible we won’t necessarily see the full “culmination” of their relationship until season 4, but I do think season 3 will at least have development and escalating tensions that are undeniable. I think it’ll likely start out slow and ramp up as the season continues. I’m not going to panic if we don’t get much in the first few episodes or if it takes until episode five to see Daniel’s turning. That might be needed, honestly, in terms of giving Lestat his necessary focus. But I think more small pieces will begin to accumulate, will escalate to a place of higher tension by the mid season, and then the finale will include some type of reveal or emotional climax, setting things up going into season 4.

And you know what, it’s worth mentioning: things have happened faster on this show than I expected before! I did not expect Daniel to be turned at the end of season 2. I thought we probably had a whole other season to go before that happened. “Well they were afraid of cancellation” / “well Eric just wanted to be a vampire so badly” and will these things also not apply to season 3/Eric and Assad wanting devil’s minion?? Idk babes. I’m doing the math and it doesn’t seem that crazy to me

[plutoswritingplanet]

Ring Of Fire (Lucifer x Female!Reader)

a/n: again, no one asked for this, but i've been rewatching supernatural and there is something about season 5 Lucifer that just hits the spot for me. this one will be multiple chapters (i swear), a bit on the darker side. Cross-Posted on AO3

Warnings: Dub-Con (nothing too scandalous), Soulmates (but not really), follows season 5 storyline, Kinda Depressing, Strongly Inspired by "Preacher's Daughter" by Ethel Cain

Summary: Knowing God has an actual plan for you would be comforting for most people. You, however, seem to be always down on your luck.

PT.2

The foliage is damp with the night's air, water seeping into the fabric of your jeans, as you sit in the low bushes, watching. Smoke still fills your lungs, and grief still fills your heart, Jo and Ellen's faces etched just beneath your eyelids. Tears stain your cheeks, drying slowly on your skin, forming an uncomfortable crust. It's been such a long time since you've experienced loss such as this. One that rips something out of you and refuses to give it back. You must've grown too comfortable since Dean has been brought back, life needed to bring you back down. Your hands hurt from the tight grip you hold on a branch of a nearby tree, nerves locking you in place, as you watch Dean approach the Devil. Except, you're not there anymore. 

It's warm inside Bobby's home, and you've changed out of your past outfit, scattering it on the floor, never to be used again. Still, you can feel phantom moisture on your knees, elbows, on the palms of your hands. Coldness, like nothing you've ever experienced, seeps deep into your bones, taking root within you. No candle, no prayer, no ancient exorcism can cleanse you of the revelations you've seen tonight. Your head feels heavy, when you drop it onto the pillow, as if some weight is pressing you further down, through the comforter, through the bed and the wooden floor. Through all the layers of Earth, until you're right where you're supposed to be. 

It's unfortunate, you thought back then, compelled to reveal yourself from your hideout by one command you couldn't ignore, he looks just like any human. Tall and lean, with a little softness to his body. His clothes were unassuming as well, casual. As if he just took a stroll through the woods from a supermarket. No one told you the name of his vessel, who he was before he said yes, why did he do it. His eyes were ordinary as well. Blue and gray, aged, tired. Human.

It would've been so easy to pass him on the streets, not knowing. He could've been one of the patrons in the countless bars you've visited while on the hunt. Handsome, yes, with an aura of a beaten dog around him, that, in any other circumstances would've made him irresistable to you. You could never refuse a hopeless case, now you supposed you knew why. 

Sam made you tea. It sits untouched on your night stand, steam flowing in dancing ribbons into the ceiling. Somehow, you can't seem to force yourself to drink it, even if you know the intention behind it has been kind. You couldn't eat as well, the smell of cooking coming from Bobby's kitchen reminded you too much of the smell of smoke coming from the exploding hardware store. And his smell. 

Burning coals, cedar wood, jasmine, all of them were pleasant once. Now, you know they will always be stuck in your head with only one association. Lucifer. 

Even thinking of his name brings a wave of shivers running down your back, as you curl into yourself on the bed. Your fingers scratch at skin of your jaw, trying to regain some sense of autonomy. Still, you can feel a phantom of his icy touch, where he grabbed your face like his hands were meant for it. And in a way they were. At least, that's what he told you. 

The demons gathered around the mass grave didn't even react, as you ran out of your cover, pushed to reveal yourself by the sight of Dean's flying body. Because how else would he coax you out, if not through the hurt of your boys? In hindsight, you were glad Dean was unconscious for the most part of this ordeal. After the night's events, it was hard to look him in the eye, you didn't need him witnessing your downfall over your head as well. Sam tried to make his way over to you, feet sliding cautiously through the grass, but suddenly Lucifer's eyes were on you, and you could feel your fate get sealed then and there. 

He clasped his hands in front of him, pursing his lips as he took you in, cowering on the ground, trying hard to find Dean's pulse. 

- You boys brought me a gift - he mused, eyes crinkling with some strange emotion - You shouldn't have. 

One gesture later, you're up on your feet, limbs trembling as he abandoned his shovel in favor of making his way towards you. You're frozen, fear seizing you in a tight grip, and you can't seem to think straight, as you watch him approach. Last day on Earth, you muse, life flashing before your eyes, when he raises both his hands. And then he grips your face, gentle yet confident, and the world around you spins. He's cold, so cold it's unnatural. Your lips fall apart in a silent gasp. 

- Do you know who you are? - he asks in a quiet voice that suddenly makes you understand why he's temptation incarnate - Do you know why you were put on this Earth?

All you can do is stare, confusion creasing your eyebrows. His breath reaches your collarbones, as he lowers his head slightly. You can hear him chuckle to himself. The sound makes you shudder, fear and anticipation mix within your gut. 

- All those years of hunting, struggling... - your life seems so trivial, coming from his lips - It all lead you here, to me. Doesn't that sound lovely?

It doesn't. It most definitely doesn't. Tears of confusion prick at the corners of your eyes, your breathing quickens. Panic settles into your nerves like a paralyzing blanket. Because here stands a threat of magnitude you couldn't even dream of. The Satan, the Devil, Bible's biggest villain. And he knows something about you, that you cannot comprehend. 

- It's really quite pathetic, when you think about it - he muses, hands leaving your face in a flash, as he starts to pace in thought.

Swaying in your place, you risk looking at Sam, his confusion mirroring your own. Dean is still unconscious beside him. There's a thin smudge of blood running down his forehead, and you want to move so badly. You've spent years caring for these boys, being there for them, whenever they needed you. Yet, at this crucial moment all you can do, is stare in horror.  

- My Father's last ditched attempt - Lucifer turns to you with a tight smile that doesn't reach his eyes - To give me my own special little bag of worms. To own, to care for, to change my mind. 

- What?

Your own voice sounds foreign to your ears. Lies. Those had to be lies. He's Satan after all, manipulation was his forte. Yes, that had to be it. Just another, messed up way at getting an upper hand over Sam. 

This time, you nearly scream when he advances towards you, his cold hands immediately finding purchase on your face, covering your jaw and your cheeks. He presses against your face so hard, you have to take a step back as he comes closer still. Sam's figure flashes out of the corner of your eye, and suddenly you feel the rough surface of a tree bark digging into your back. 

- You - for the first time you can hear some tension in his voice, something more than cold indifference - You were made for me, Honey. Just like Sam is destined to be my vessel, you're destined to be by my side. To own, to care. - he repeats those words like a mantra, and you want to throw up at how genuine he sounds.

He smiles at your terror. Tears start to flow freely from your eyes, falling on his cold fingers, skipping down his arms in smudges. His hands start to move, a perversion of a caress, as he ruffles your hair. Your head bounces off the tree, and you try with all your might to free yourself out of his grip. Your limbs flail at your sides, and you crane your neck so far back, your muscles start to strain. He doesn't let go, pressing himself closer, one of his hands coming up to grip your hair. Your nails dig into his cotton shirt, as you push against his chest to no avail. 

- No - you whisper, your rejection falling flat against his unaffected stare - I'd never...

- See, but that's the best part - his sudden enthusiasm scares you deeper, than any passive stare ever could. - Unlike Sam...

You backpedal into the tree again, as he leans closer still. His cold breath mixes with your short, panicked ones, and your stomach churns, when he tilts his head in curiosity, as if he's experiencing this intimacy for the first time. And in a way, you suppose he is. Then, his eyes meet yours, gray captivates you, and you hold your breath on instinct.

- You don't have to say yes to me. 

You're not even allowed the decency of taking a gasp of air, when his lips press into yours. It feels beyond weird. He's unnaturally cold, and there is a sort of unpracticed sloppiness in the way he fights for your mouth to fit against each other. Reminding you of your first, inexperienced romances, he smashes your faces together until you feel both sets of your teeth through the flesh. Then, he pulls back just a smidgen, taking in your terrified face. Something flashes through his expression, and he sighs, leaning back towards you, stopping just short of your left ear. 

- Kiss me like you mean it, or I'll make Dean eat his intestines. 

He looks at you, just once, letting you know this is not a game. Your heart stops. 

Dean's unconscious body starts to move by the tree, and never in your life have you felt so helpless. So, when Lucifer unavoidably leans back down, you give him all you've got. Your body arches, hands come up to his hair, and you will yourself not to feel grossed out by the feeling of his cold tongue slipping past your teeth. It's a fight for survival, you remind yourself, as his hands move to your back, rubbing your skin like a horny teenager in a bathroom stall. The short supply of air you've been granted runs out quickly, and as pressure builds in your lungs, you start to push against the Archangel's chest. He doesn't register what you're doing, not at first, confusing your sudden unwillingness as some sort of late attempt at rebellion. That is, until you bang your fist against his shoulder, letting out a muffled scream. 

Finally, he detaches himself, hair even more disheveled than before. You take a heaving gasp of air, as you brace yourself against the tree, your vision swimming ever so slightly. Lucifer watches you, his body hunched over, as if he's observing some middle schooler's science project. There are new tears in your eyes, just waiting to fall. Your hair is disheveled and your lips are puffy from his unpracticed assaults. His right hand comes up to his face, and he bites on his index finger in thought. 

- You really are human - he muses to himself, and with every fiber of your being, you try to explode his head with your brain - That's no fun, you'll break so easily...

- Fuck you - your words make his eyebrows raise, and he straightens out with a flourish.

- Fuck you - he repeats, mocking your tone - Yeah, I probably will - you watch, disgusted, as he sends a wink towards Sam.

Then, he's back to his shovel, back to his mass grave, where he completes the ritual. 

You can't move, not really, even when Sam tugs on your shoulder. Your head runs empty, realization of your current predicament far from registered in your brain. You stay frozen in your spot, when Castiel arrives, taking the three of you back to Bobby's house. Only, when the Angel's hand pushes against your rib cage, only when you feel Enochian symbols burn into your bones, do you lift your gaze. Apologetic doesn't really cover the way Castiel looks at you, and the pity painted on his face drags you down more than any Devil could.  

Sam is the only one to truly understand, when you fall to the floor, shock, anger and dread spilling out of you like a broken faucet. He's the only one that truly knows how it feels to have your bodily autonomy stripped away by the literal Devil. How it feels to have a threat of such magnitude hanging over you, every day. Which is why, he's the one to lift you in his arms, and get you to the guest room, lead away by the concerned glances of the rest of the men. He's the one to make you tea, bring you fresh clothes. He opens the window when the smell of dinner makes you retch. And finally, he's the one to explain, what really happened back on that hill to the rest of the group.

From your fetal position on the bed you can hear Dean curse, throw something somewhere. All the ways he knows, how to show he cares. Despite everything, it makes you smile, face pressed to the pillow that smells like cigarette smoke and beer. You're doomed. There's nothing you can do against God's plan, and you can feel that thought take root in you like an invasive species ready to destroy every crop in it's path. Still, despite it all, a sense of security falls upon you like a decieving blanket. 

- What sort of a messed up game is this? - Dean screams somewhere in the house, you assume it's at Cass, the only one even remotely aware of your destiny. 

The idea, that God made you specifically to be Satan's personal therapist sounds far fetched at best, but given how the last couple of months have been going, you're more inclined to believe in the absolutely worst scenarios. You don't even need to hear Castiel's response. The sound of glass breaking is telling enough. Then, a door slamms somewhere, and the house falls into heavy silence.

You can't think. Can't allow yourself to fall apart more than you've had already. So, you focus on the sound of your own breathing, interlinked with your heartbeat. Steady, alive. Your eyelids are heavy, eyes burn with drying tears, so you close them and sigh. Exhaustion pinns you in place, sinking you into the blankets. Darkness welcomes you like a long lost friend.

Your boys will find a way, they always do. And Lucifer can't find you, not with the wards Castiel has put on you. You'll have to thank him i the morning, you think, and it's the last conscious thought you have, before slipping into sleep, shivering like an abandoned child. 

[noneorother]

There's a *puppet* show going on in the magic shop, and it looks awfully familiar...

(Insert unhealthy number of rewatches here) The magic shop in S2 is a real jewel box. There's so much symbolism and so many easter eggs, it starts to make your head spin. But I found something really weird going on with the puppets (or should I say angels) in the background...

Here's 1941 : you can see on the left what looks like closed red curtains, and a coatrack with puppets behind Crowley here.

Where am I going with this? Well, don't those puppets look familiar?

For my money, they really look like silly versions of Crowley and Aziraphale, with a few other familiar puppets hiding on the other side of the rack.

Now here's that exact same shot in the present. The red curtain falls away to reveal: An extremely symmetrical arrangement of truly weird puppets. The puppet in the glass case near the back is the same.*

It probably just looks like a creepy display, with our familiar Aziraphale and Crowley puppets, until I do this:

To me at least, this arrangement really looks like a depiction of a synaxis of the hosts of bodiless powers (i.e. angels) before Jesus. If you study European art history, you can't escape medieval religious iconography. It's kind of a big deal. I've put this example of Mary flanked by the nine ranks of Angels from a Cathedral in Exeter above, but you can find 100 examples of this kind of eerily symmetrical and hierarchical ranking of angels with god, Jesus, Mary etc... Before I break it down, you have to know that in the medieval period, and especially in religious art and iconography, the relative size and position of figures is WAY more important than realism or accuracy.

Obviously the costumes don't match one to one, but you get enough of a vibe that once you start seeing it you can't UNSEE it. The relationships of position and size here are fascinating to me. For one, what the hell are two Crowleys doing in a host arrangement in present day? He's not even an angel. In the second row we have archangels Gabriel, the flopsy twins Uriel and Michael, and a slightly larger Saraqael head in the center. Is Saraqael actually more important here? Technically Jim is still an archangel, so he gets the mirror of the Gabriel position, but as a sad clown wearing a tartan blanket. We also have two tiny dolls (not puppets) with star name tags, one keeled over wearing brown, and one sitting up and smiling, wearing blue. I've named them tentatively Adam & Jesus for now, because that's the vibe I'm getting, but who knows. Here's the usual position of the Jesus in a synaxis for comparison.

In the lowest row, we bizarrely have arguably the most powerful angel, The Metatron (shown here with a dark floppy overcoat hiding the fact the doll has no body) and what I can only imagine is Maggie with blonde hair and blue eyes? What? Now, the doll I'm calling God in the middle for the large size, and the fact their head is always cut off above the framing in the shot. God is clearly looming large over the rest of the host, but is in a lower hierarchy (with Muriel, Crowley & Aziraphale being fairly low ranking at this point in the show) and also has NO HANDS, a clown face and BLOOD SMEARS on their overalls. Yikes. If you take a look at the top-down shot of the dolls, you can see how they had to completely redo the god-doll's hair. This is a specific vintage English doll called "Bimbo the clown". You can see the original hair always has a fringe, and the yarn locks are usually much bigger. Compare with the new hair in the top view of the present-day shop.

Hey. Does that hair style look familiar to anyone?

Look. I don't want to go claiming something THIS insane from one doll's hairstyle in a background shot. I'm not trying to convince you this is irrefutable proof that there's some sort of storyline where Nina is actually God. But it's interesting they took the trouble to re-make the doll's hair (and costume) to look like Nina's, even when it is almost never seen, much less noticed. The fact that the god-doll is also a clown got me thinking of the Gabriel and Jim dolls, and that maybe there's another doll in the shop that should double with Bimbo? *Here's the only other doll with a name card in the magic shop in either time, the one in the glass case :

Even though we barely see it, we can tell it's wearing the same outfit as the 1941 magician. Why? If this one is the equivalent of the real god, and not the sad clown version, and if it's locked up in a box somewhere, unable to free themselves, is that why we haven't heard from them in season 2....? So many questions. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Thanks to @kimberleyjean and @embracing-the-ineffable for additional pictures.

[blasphemousclaw]

For send a character ask: Radahn!

ahh, Radahn… forever an enigma

• favorite thing about them

who he is as a person — his family background, his beliefs, and who he ultimately chooses to be — is so endlessly interesting to me. being a child of both the Erdtree and the Moon, growing up idolizing the Erdtree’s champions like his father and Godfrey, but being a talented sorcerer in his own right like his mother, was he conflicted when Radagon betrayed Rennala? did he ever come to resent his father, both for breaking his mother’s heart and for replacing his greatest idol, Godfrey? there’s something so significant to me about Radagon despising his red hair, and Radahn embracing that same hair he inherited as the mark of a champion. did this affect his relationship with Radagon? on the other hand, did he know that challenging the stars was also halting his Carian family’s fate? did he care? there’s such a fascinating back-and-forth between Radahn and both sides of his family!

• least favorite thing about them

his writing in the dlc… will never get over how botched it feels. and I’m not talking about the actual plot points, I’m talking about how those plot points were revealed to us in the story! the reason why everyone felt like him showing up was an asspull plot twist was because there’s no hint whatsoever in the base game that Miquella and Radahn ever had a relationship at all. as a result, I think the writers had to speedrun a Radahn-Miquella reveal plotline with Freyja and Ansbach, while cramming references to Radahn into the dlc (like the Red Bear npc, and his relationship to Gaius and Messmer) to make him seem less out of nowhere�� but to me it just comes across as a rushed plotline with extremely clumsy foreshadowing. I guess they didn’t know they would get to make a dlc when they made the game so they didn’t include anything about him and Miquella in the base game so there wouldn’t be random plot threads that go nowhere, or they originally planned something slightly different that didn’t pan out so they had to rework it but were only able to do so in the dlc. either way extremely disappointing. also his promised consort remembrance weapons are the laziest excuse for a remembrance of all time they’re just the starscourge greatswords again but different. is this some kind of sick joke

• favorite line

[footage not found]

just kidding he does have a few quotes: I’ve always liked “I was born a champion’s cub. Now I am the Lord of the Battlefield’s lion.” because of what it says about how he sees Radagon and Godfrey!

• brOTP

Rykard :33 his painting of Radahn means so much to me, it’s such a fond gesture… and the abductor virgins in Caelid seem like Rykard was really looking out for him! it makes me sad to think that they might’ve once been really close but drifted apart because of the war and their own priorities, but also still cared about each other

• ОТР

I don’t actively ship him with anyone tbh nothing has especially caught my interest

• nОТР

I resent Radahn/Miquella ONLY because their relationship has no buildup whatsoever and completely breaks the “show don’t tell” rule of storytelling. we’re told Miquella admired Radahn, but we never see this until he shows up as the final boss! I definitely wouldn’t dislike this ship if they had handled this storyline better but unfortunately with how things went it’s just embarrassing to me

• random headcanon

loves the outdoors… camping, hiking, riding, hunting, any physical activity where he gets to be outside. Rykard is the opposite. Radahn used to bring him on trips and he’d complain the whole way through

• unpopular opinion

I wrote a post about this already, but I think people are too quick to assume that he’s a Golden Order loyalist who wants to preserve the world in its current state. you could go on and on listing reasons why he would actually oppose the current Order… and in fact I did go on and on about it here. I think the most crucial thing to note is that Radahn has always made idolizing Godfrey his entire personality, and Godfrey was literally banished… the Order is very different now from what it once was!

• song i associate with them

again I only listen to instrumental music so I don’t really have thoughts on this sorry 🥹

• favorite picture of them

the Rykard painting <3

I really like how he’s depicted here… he’s got like a mature, lined face, and the way the painting is displayed (in a nicely furnished drawing room above the fireplace) feels like a very public declaration of respect and admiration? I think it says something about Radahn’s character that his brother who despises the Golden Order still seems to look up to him and care for him!

[tinkerbelle05]

i needddddddddddd a luffy angst or smut pleaseeeeee idc abt the storyline or if its short or long i js need luffy so badly

Second Place

Characters: Luffy x Wife!reader

Genre: Angst

Summary: You loved Luffy, and you knew that he loved you too. However, you also know that you will always be 2nd place to his love. He was more in love with being the king of the pirates and it’s starting to show. And you had enough.

Warning: bad relationships, angst, bad ending, slightly ooc Luffy tbh, no proofread

—

You laid there, on your cold bed in the middle of the night. The only light source was the dimmed moonshine from the window, but otherwise, it was pitch black and silent. You always tried waiting up for Luffy, so you could sneak in a goodnight kiss and maybe a light conversation.

You always loved your nighttime conversations with him. It'll be you two, in this very bed, talking about anything and everything until you both fell asleep in eachother’s arms. That's how you would wake up too.

But those times were nothing but a distant memory. Something to warm you while you laid there cold and lonely.

When Luffy did make it through the door, he was quiet. Maybe he didn’t want to disturb? That’s what you thought at first too. Until you realize it was because he was injured in some fight or mission you weren’t made aware of. You weren’t made aware of a lot of things.

You recalled vividly of when you first discovered.

You sat there on the bed reading with a candle lit. By this time you were knocked out snoring but you wanted to at least say talk with your husband first. With he’s busy schedule, it was hard to make time for each other so this was the next best thing.

You saw the bedroom door opening and it revealed Luffy. But he looked more than just tired. His skin was pale and clammy, he looked absolutely terrible.

Immediately, you were up and out of bed. You walked towards him, your brows frowned with worry but before you could utter a single word, he shuts you down.

“Don’t.” He said and laid down on the bed with a deep sigh.

You stood there, in shock and dismayed. It was rude, it was dismissive. As if you were a nagging child and not a concerned wife.

You glared down at him, “Well excuse me for worrying about my husband.” You laid down on the bed, at the edge of your side and with your back to him. You heard him sigh and shift in the bed.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I’m…I’m just stressed. With all of the missions and—”

You sat up and turned to him, “Missions? Since when did you have missions?”

You don’t remember anyone telling you about missions at all. To you, the Strawhats hadn’t been on a single mission for a month, which you thought was weird but you didn’t know much about pirates to question it.

You saw as Luffy winced, “Oh, sorry. I guessed I forgot to tell you. Was to busy planning them, hehe.” He laughed softly, obviously trying to lightened the mood.

You didn’t want that, however. You had plenty of questions, but. This was probably the first time in weeks you gotten to talk to Luffy. An actual conversation, not just quick greetings and chaste kisses.

You sighed and got comfortable on the bed. You were noticeable closer to Luffy now.

“Well tell me about the missions? Where’d you go? What’d you take?”

Luffy chuckled at your questions and went into full detail about all of the things you missed out.

But that was two months ago and things have only gotten worse. There are times where Luffy barely acknowledged you, he makes no time for you, nor does he put in any effort to your marriage.

It was always you scheduling dates that had to be canceled, it’s always you wanting to talk but he’s too tired to give you the time of day, and it’s always you making sure he takes care of his wounds. Or gets enough sleep. Or he eats something that isn’t meat.

You understood that Luffy wanted to be King of the Pirates but he was becoming increasingly reckless in his pursuits. Which meant more wounds that you needed to take care of because he couldn’t be bothered to do it himself.

You were tired of it. You felt like a servant rather than a wife. You guessed you weren’t enough. Wiping off the stray tears from your cheeks, you began to pack your clothes. The Going Merry was docked at some island—you had forgotten the name but you had some money saved up. You’ll be fine without him.

With your bags packed, you started twisting the ring on your finger. It was a pretty thing, something you thought you would always wear until your dying breath. You slipped it off your finger and placed it on the desk that was overflowing with maps of foreign lands.

“What are you doing?” You heard Luffy. You turned to see him standing at the doorway. His eyes caught to your packed bags and the ring that was on the desk.

His expression was unreadable but it obviously wasn’t happy.

“I’m leaving,” you responded and pushed passed him. Surprisingly, he followed you. He didn’t utter a word to you until you got to the docks, you guessed that he assumed you were bluffing, but you weren't.

“Why?!” You heard Luffy shout and that stopped you in your tracks. It made your blood run cold that he even had the audacity to ask such a question.

“Excuse me? Don’t ask stupid questions like that, Luffy,” you glared up at him.

He ran after you, grabbing your arm to stop you from moving, “How is it a stupid question?! How is it a stupid question to ask why my wife is leaving me?”

“Oh so now I’m your wife,” you sassed. “Luffy, when was the last time we kissed? Held hands? Hell, when was the last time we had a conversation that wasn’t about your recklessness?! When was the last time you held me in your arms?!”

His face betrayed no emotion, “I…I know I haven’t been the best husband, I can admit that. But, you know how important my dream is to me. To be the best of the best, I have to work hard.”

You tilted your head. Feeling your heart break all over again, you asked him the question that’s been weighing on your mind for a while.

“Is being the pirate king more important than me? Than being a good husband?” You asked.

You knew the answer. It was obvious to you, but you wanted to hear it from him.

“Now—“

“It’s a yes or no, Luffy. Answer the question,” You pressed him

"Listen, you know that it's always been my dream to become the Pirate King, and that comes with sacrifices," Luffy explained. He stepped closer to you and attempted to touch your arm but you pulled away. Your rejection didn't stop him from continuing, "But never doubt that I don't love you. Because I do and--"

You smiled sharply, "You may love me or think that you love me, but I will always be second place in your dreams. Your dreams would always take priority over me and I..I cannot accept that. Not anymore." You said and turned around, trying to blink back the tears.

Luffy wasn't the best husband in the world, that was obvious. But when he was there and present, he was so, so good to you. Your best friend, your confidant, your "forever". And while a small part of you still loved Luffy, still wanted him to hear him say that you are his number one, you knew that it was only a dream that would never come true.

You turn back around one last time and leave him with this, "Goodbye, Luffy. I hope you get your dream."

-

Tags: @abree234, @louissolovely, @randomhoex, @marceesworld, @dragonqueenfk, @puff-hugs, @childofhecate108, @foxflamewarrior, @msmisasoup, @localcowboyd, @thatgothic-nerd, @0picels0, @charliepoopyfart, @rotin0, @nikolaevna-art, @cielitoot7, @tayharrper, @simpingmyassoff, @borkbarnes, @villainouspotential, @ramielll, @fujinnn, @fuck-you-im-gae, @poketrainer2270, @dazaisfavgf, @smolraccoon25, @hopester08, @don-tuna, @avatarkanemi, @dimplewonie, @fandomsunited, @synchronised-beat

Masterlist & Taglist & Reqs Info

[fivelasanctum]

I blame the snippets from the Commission handbook I found online but I am shipping the young man form of Founderfive + Lila together. Love her with her canon beloved in any form. A bit of a crackship but still intriguing in the scope of fanon and the fanfiction realm. Does offer many compelling storyline developments if he had survived past season three. Or a trace of himself lingered in the timelines given he created the time Commission and most likely the subway system as a possible contingency plan. Five assumed he was 100 years old given that is a normal human lifespan and he passed away in his 'can'. In the excerpt he mentioned he no long remembered his name. Yet he was still quite lucid to talk to his other self to not save the world. Not suffering from dementia at all. Been established that time was nothing when at the commission. Why we can't truly gauge lila's age given she worked for them as well. Five was suppose to only do 5 years of service for the Handler but was still with them up until he was 56 or 58 year old self. Was rescued when he was 45. Time is subjective. So the founder may be more godlike in terms of his age and abilities (thinking timelord for those familiar with the Doctor Who series)

As shown in the image above: Seems to be a somber, melancholic version of five that is filled with regrets. Horrified about what he has created. That has a life all it's own. Essentially feels the road of hell was paved with good intentions but that despite the original aim for what he wanted, "time is a finicky mistress." Cannot be molded by one person no matter how powerful the founder became. "someone I lost" could mean his youthful self that was self aware and confident in his purpose. Knowing what he wanted and needed to do. Believing he could change the world on his own. Since founder lost touch with what it meant to be a 'Five'. Yet it can also mean he lost his version of lila. The series is familiar with tragic endings with couples. Luther and sloane were sweet, married each other and looked to be endgame. Yet when the universe was reset, luther remembered and still loved her but for whatever reasons, couldn't find her. When five and her found him in the bunker she did have pity for him. Trying to calm Five's ire towards the founder since by this time he was in a more fragile state when it came to his health. He did acknowledge her with 'bingo.' A five-ism I'll call it. Confirming she was keeping up with it all. Not confused like other characters would be (Diego and luther in particular) When he did perish, she was hesitant to leave her five alone with now dead founder. Knowing it was an emotional moment for him. Confronted with his future mortality and the realization he would be alone. Not having accomplished what he sought out to do. Their was another revelation in the commission handbook that five can't use his powers if his hands are bound yet was not verified completely. Take with a grain of salt since I still need to purchase the book and this is second-third hand accounts from others that gave hints to some lore on five/founder. Still opens some doors with the information. Many ways to go with founderfive and lila within the fandom. ♥ Could be more manic with a god complex in his younger days since five revealed to Klaus he thought he could evade death in addition to time and disasters. Would make founder be more insane or at the very least more of an anti-hero type character. ♥ slow-burn beauty and the beast tale with Lila. Projects being more insane than he actually is to push her away. ♥ Possibly stalking/watching her when both were at the time commission courtesy of his own powers and the infinite switch board. ♥ Their were three chairs in the bunker with opened alcohol bottles and glasses. Showing he could have had company but with himself. Since he made the Bunker paradox psychosis proof. Most likely to bounce ideas off alternate fives for how to save the world before he threw in the towel in the end. ♥ Perhaps created paradox psychosis as a means of sticking it to his other selves. Five has always been self deprecating as we saw with his adventure with luther. Both trying to kill each other and insult one another. Founder could see what his alternate selves were doing, jealous if they had a happier life with their 'lila' compared to his situation of being stuck at the commission with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Well. More than one world infinite ones due to timelines branching off. ♥ With his mastery over time it could have served as a double edged sword. Slowing down his own time subconsciously. Lila, while able to mimic his abilities, she could have hit her limits. Having to watch her age eventually while he would remain. Maybe worked on finding a way to let his time move so he could reunite with her. In the comics, Five is frozen in time as a ten year old. Never able to grow from that point. The handler was able to freeze time for a couple minutes and she wasn't even the highest ranking person in the commission. Makes sense founder can impart a crumb of his powers. ♥ Founder serving as the battery core of the commission for everything to function. Suitcases leeching off his power, creating custom timelines.

♥ Idea of founder being annoyed with his other self. Jealous if main lila has a relationship already with main five. Might separate him in three bodies. Representing the three parts of his mind while in physical, different ages. Kid five, apocalypse five and 25 year old five at the end of the series. Yet all have the memories of lila and events leading up to what founder did on a whim. Can't stay separated forever since memories or sense of self can be distorted. Just some ideas I have had and other Fivela/live/Fila fans have had when discussing this on Discord <3 Thanks for reading~

[scoobydoodean]

speaking of your "15.20 is like a punishment for Sam" idea, I've thought that Dean's death, Sam living on, etc. was supposed to echo the season 3 finale, except with a sort of remixing of Sam & Dean's roles.

imo it was only a few minutes that Dean was in heaven without Sam, because Bobby says time works differently in heaven ("Time up here, it's… it's different. You got everything you could ever want… or need or… dream.") in what seems like a deliberate echo of Dean's line around his time in hell ("It was four months up here, but down there… I don't know. Time's different.") so: in 3.16, Sam isn't able to save Dean, Dean dies & goes to hell, Sam goes on his revenge quest vs. 15.20 Sam isn't able to save Dean, Dean dies & goes to heaven, Sam lives a 'normal' life until he dies & reunites w/ Dean. Dean spends 40 years in hell, Sam 4 months on earth; Dean spends a few minutes (say 4) in heaven, Sam spend ~40 years on earth/in metaphorical 'hell' or at least in grief before finally reuniting w/ Dean. as you say, all the people Sam is closest to die/leave and he just has to live on for decades after. he does get his 'reward' in going to heaven and reuniting with Dean and everybody else, but still!

(on a writing level, it feels revealing to me that the writers didn't go with a remix of season 3's original ending, of Sam being able to save Dean. because the actual season 3 ending didn't happen naturally but because of real-world setbacks. yeah yeah Dean dying & Sam carrying on it fits with the show's focus on how people deal with death and death's inevitability, but... idk, there's something about it that just feels off to me. can't explain it logically though.)

Yeah that's one of the other Big Things for me about the ending of Supernatural is that it presents Sam as a failure who tried over and over to save his brother but always failed. He wanted to save Dean in season 3 and failed repeatedly and it ripped him apart. He deluded himself into thinking (to an extent) that he was saving Dean somehow in season 4 (see: 4.12 and 4.18) but he epically failed. Season 5 was supposed to culminate in some sort of redemption in a way, but then Sam came back soulless and harmed Dean. Then in 8.14, he promised to save Dean from his suicidal thoughts, but then became suicidal himself, tried to kill himself, blamed Dean for not Sam not killing himself, and then Dean did something reckless (take on the Mark of Cain) as a build up to literal years of depression and then again at the end of season 9, culminating in his death (and Sam was trying to be there but Dean got stabbed through the heart anyway). Then Sam makes a series of incredibly morally dubious plays to save Dean in season 10 but unleashes the darkness at the same time, which again—culminates in Dean needing to die to save the world at the end of season 11 (with a brief stint where Sam tries to take on the Mark of Cain but fails). Then Dean succeeds in stopping the world from ending all on his own, and comes to save Sam from the BMoL. Then Dean agrees to be possessed by AU Michael to save Sam and Jack. Then Dean makes the box plan and Sam insists Dean not get in the Mal-ak box and that he trust Sam to fix all of this. Then they don't actually fucking fix it. It all blows up in their faces and causes a chain reaction like so many dominos toppled over.

And over all of that time... Sam also has a fixation on trust. He wants Dean to trust him so bad, but Sam never actually succeeds at the things he promises/wants and tries to get Dean to believe he can do so bad (without dire consequences). And I don't think Dean resents Sam for that, and I really don't actually think he distrusts Sam either in the late series. But I think it weighs on Sam and that's part of why he has a fixation on trust to begin with that he can never really let go of. All that to say... if I had to summarize the "brothers" storyline, it culminates in Sam failing at the number one thing he wanted to accomplish most: save Dean from a young and bloody death. And the fact that the majority of the people who claim to love Sam and Dean's brotherhood more than anything celebrate that as poetic disgusts me, because there is nothing poetic about it at all. It's meaningless garbage that makes Sam look like an utter failure who is being punished.

[udkmehahaha]

i know that there is a lot of people out there that believe that wills love towards mike in season 4 is forced, and i just wanna say, if you truly believe that, you most definitely need to take a rewatch.

its literally the least forced thing ever. its been THERE infront of our faces since the first episode, the only difference is that they revealed it in season 4 and started putting more light on it. there is a clear difference between forced inclusivity in shows, and actual well written storylines. forced inclusivity is half assed, not taken seriously, and for the most part only there for fan service. but wills love towards mike is genuinely a beautifully written example of queer love especially during the 80's. i have seen so many queer people out there talking about how much they relate to will, and you dont really see people talking about how they relate to forced inclusive characters.

i dont understand why people are against it so much. dont get me wrong, i used to ship mileven until season 3 when it became obvious that they are not compatible, and they make each other feel like shit. i absolutely love eleven as a character, like thats my girl. and if her ending up with mike in the end was the best for her character then i would absolutely want that for her, but thats just simply not the case, thats why a lot of people ship byler and are against mileven.

if you actually pay attention, you can see that mike/will being the end couple makes wayyyy more sense and is actually the better option. i hate when people just look at everything from surface level. "oh sad traumatized queer boy pines for his straight best friend who is in love with another girl."

like no, it's so much more complex than that, mike is such a more complex character. and there are many analysis' on here that will back up everything im saying, so maybe take some time to read them and you will understand why mike/will is the better couple.

thank u if you read all this

[moonspirit]

The possibilities of certain story elements of AOT going differently if Annie never crystalised herself? Of course, it would still lead her to be arrested and questioned, making Armin worried (etc.) Though, what about other storyline segments? Like, what if she was there when Reiner & Bert revealed themselves? Helping to stop Rod Reiss with Eren? Or fighting Reiner along with Eren again, while taking back Sina? ..To also witness Armin's burnt body. Man, that'd be tragic, huh?

But - hey! At least Armin's and Annie's relationship could grow with them together! Plus, gives him a reason to be held by Annie, in her Titan Form. All of this sparked out of.. nowhere, really... I just really like Aruani. Have a wonderful day, Moon!

Hiii anon!!!! I'm sorry this took so long to respond (in case you thought I ignored you, that's totally not it T^T) - I just needed some time to process this!

This is actually very interesting to think about, especially since we often acknowledge the magnitude of the impact Aruani's Female Titan arc had on the story as a whole. There's many posts about that, about how the rest of AoT literally wouldn't have existed if not for Stohess. It was Armin's cornering of Annie and her crystallization that set everything in motion.

Now, let's get to your questions! (tho I'm very bad at AU and canon-divergence stuff so I'm sorry in advance and bear with me 🥲)

Considering that for the most part we are given the impression that Annie was the only one in RBA actually doing any serious work in ref to their mission (ie she wasn't losing herself in living a false reality like Reiner nor hesitating to act like Bertholdt), it kind strikes me that she would NOT have been impressed when Reiner and Bertholdt... revealed their identities. As aloof and disliking of her companions as she may have seemed, Annie's loyalty to them and the secrets they were keeping cannot be ignored - the whole reason she crystallized was so nobody would get a word out of her and that those two would remain safe. So imagine her horror when those two just waltz up to Eren and go "Heyyyy we're the chunky titan and the big titan, what's good?" 🙃

Tho before all this, we have to step back a bit and wonder - how much would she have given away while being questioned? Not much of her volition imo, but perhaps someone smart (say Armin, Hange, etc) would piece together little bits of info she lets slip, or her interrogation is purposely set up to exhaust and drive her to the point of near-madness until she gives up. Perhaps a combination of the two too.

It's also pertinent to note that tho loyal, Annie's also selfishly driven to her own cause - that of returning to her father, so we should also probably underline the possibility that she co-operates with the enemy (in this case Paradis) if it means she can find an escape back home along the way. It cannot be stressed enough that doing this is not too out of line for Annie's character, but it will load her with a massive tonne of guilt she'll never talk to anyone about, especially if it means leaving Reiner and Bertholdt's fate in their own hands. Annie was taught by her father to rely on herself and trust nobody else. There's only so much of leeway she can allow her emotions to have before she steels herself again.

Back to your questions! Assuming a scenario exists where Annie doesn't give away Rei-Bert's identities, instead striking a deal with Erwin, let's say, to keep some of her secrets while co-operating with the Scouts (this is a ticking time-bomb Erwin's planning to take control of, but mind you, Annie wants to escape before it comes to that). Rei-bert expose themselves on the wall and take off with Eren.

What will Annie do? Will she stay with the Scouts to get Eren back, or follow those two hoping they'll somehow make it past Shiganshina where the others can't follow? A chance to return home?

It's hard to say, given she's still loyal to her cause and Reibert, and coldly realistic in her approach that just because she's cooperating with the Scouts doesn't mean she switches sides - acting is only a temporary gig to get what she wants and to where she wants. If she stays with the Scouts, it's probably only to hit a milestone of an escape plan she's got; but if she goes off with Reibert, then it's because she sees her chance and takes it.

What then? We again have two possibilities forking out of this one scenario alone. Will she escape successfully with Reiner, Bert and Ymir? Or will she be caught by the Scouts and stay in Paradis; what becomes of her trustworthiness then? (nothing good. For aruani, add more angst)

With Rod Reiss, you know I honestly think it'd be REALLY interesting for Annie to meet with Kenny again xD I honestly love how every single one of the three Ackermans managed to get Annie at one point in time or the other (it's funny lmao) - it would be SO intriguing to see her come face to face with him. I'm not sure what thematic/symbolic significance this could have (I'm typing this out while sleepy xD), but I think something about Kenny being a slave to his ideals and desires could lead Annie to question her own beliefs or rather, mirror hers albeit in a different light. Kenny's "love" is shown to us in a very twisted shape - ie his relationship with Kuchel, his "raising" of Levi (with violence and purpose. reminds you of another father, maybe?), his pursuit of impossible dreams vis a vis Annie's very simple ones. I don't really know what I'm trying to say here except that I'm now picturing Annie being in the frame (perhaps hidden or not) when Levi finds out that the dying Kenny is his uncle - it seems important in a way I can't quite put to words xD?

About Shiganshina... oh we can't talk about Shiganshina 🥲🥲🥲🥲 I only know for certain that Aruani's relationship would most likely have progressed into a solid relationship, maybe? by this point (or not, given the speed at which things were happening left and right...), so... I can't even begin to imagine the devastation that Armin's "death" and the subsequent Serum Debacle would wreak on Annie. Tho the latter is honestly a PRIME opportunity for her feelings to become obvious to everyone that was blind to it hehe xD

But the angst... not only will it be Annie's guilt about battling Rei-Bert again (whether or not she's still playing actor or has legimiately switched sides is irrelevant)........ but also.... what would a struggle among Ackerman and Leonhart vs Ackerman have come to? God. You know, I actually wanna see that T^T Levi's just gonna lie there and be like "I hate these 104th girls. Always whining about some idiot boy, fuck my life. Erwin, haul me up man."

God. We'd never run out of possibilities to talk about xD You could draw a flowchart or a scenario-tree and it'd just keep going.

Anyway, I'm sorry that this is ALL over the place, really, I couldn't find a way to logically talk about all these things without diving into pages and pages worth of hyper specific possibilities (and that will bore everybody to death) T___T all the same it's very messy and incoherent imo, so I apologise if this isn't what you wanted! We can talk about this more tho, send me your thoughts :3!

[silviakundera]

Did a speedrun through modern cdrama Everyone Loves Me because I'm a fan of both leads. A fairly well constructed romcom for a specific trope, AND also one of the most valid examples of the critique that cdrama storylines are pointlessly over-extended. This would have been a great modern drama at 12 episodes. Unfortunately, it's at least 10 episodes too long. The literal gaming (characters interacting while playing videogames) is very light - it's an initiating plot device piece but doesn't consume much actual screen time. The real genre is IT workplace romance with Hidden Identity trope.

Do you like:

* Capable & ambitious female lead x male lead with a competency kink whose turn-offs are white lotus & green tea girls and turn-ons are brash ladies who can cuss you out; dressing up to impress is not required

* Romantic dynamic of equal partners (2 strong personalities, not active/passive)

* "We don't know yet who is going to be the breadwinner. My goal is to be a CEO."

* Low heat (just a few kisses),

* modern workplace dramas (so much working)

[heavy spoilers below]

The actual set up & outline are:

* Online friend group who casually game together, in the last days of university. One of the guys starts catching feelings for the girl, our FL (let's call him Gamer Friend). FL isn't romantically considering Gamer Friend at all, because she has a crush on a guy from her uni.

* This crush is Gamer Friend in rl! 😮

* ML isn't open to being crushed on by anyone at rl uni, because he is already hung up on FL (as his online friend) 🙈

* FL asks for advice from her gaming buds on how to pursue her rl crush. Gamer Friend doesn't want her to succeed, because he wants to win her heart, so he keeps giving terrible advice to chase him by acting out the soft-spoken innocent maiden archetype (the opposite of FL's real boisterous & brash personality)

* This creates a comedy of errors where ML in rl is being pursued by the woman he's in love with, but he's shooting her down left & right. This culminates in her confessing and he publically rejects her in a harsh manner. When she comes crying (and vengeful) to the group, the guys all realize the identity confusion. Appropriately horrified, bros have no idea what to do. (This whole scene is gold tbh.)

* This plotline covers 7 episodes, but should have been dealt with in 4.

* Next 5 episodes (should have been 2!): Gamer Friend, toiling under karma, tries to be virtually supportive of his beloved while in person desperately making gestures to show remorse & have her less willing to obliterate his RL person. (this is all complicated by them both hired into the same company post-grad; there's a whole gaming dev & art design subplot - like in Lighter & Princess, the writers did the research so the setting is reality-based). This arc ends with identity reveal: she finally knows irl crush = Gamer Friend

* Next 6-7 episodes lead her from being (rightfully) furious and humiliated to them finally becoming friendly & supportive of each other. He waits to ask for more until he feels truly forgiven for the shakespearean hijinks that kept them apart. Includes work drama and fake-dating For Reasons. This arc, again, could have been 3-4 episodes.

* Final 5 episode arc is dating era and culmination of the gaming dev plotline. Heavy emphasis on work drama. Only 2 out of the last 5 episodes had significant romance material for the main couple, which was the major flaw in the drama. Avoided the separation cliche but also no marriage scenes at the end - we just see that they're still close, supportive partners a year later. Should have been 3 episodes ;)

The structure is right for a simple rom com set up of: one party pursues, gets rejected, then the other party pursues & corrects their mistake. The misunderstandings are logical enough; FL is assertive and we see evidence of her talent (not just told); ML likes her for herself & doesn't want a childish, obedient woman like the idol dramas represent; they are shown to make a good team & respect each other; the wronged party isn't a push over and their forgiveness has to be earned. It's clear why they like each other and that they work as a couple. (Though the emphasis is on compatibility & domesticity rather than sexual heat.)

The showrunner just needed to compress each arc and spend a lot less time on corporate minutiae. The way I engage with this type of drama is to binge, skip all 2nd couple scenes, and liberal use of fast forward ⏩⏩.

[your-mums-nuts]

Loved the carriage scene, watched it three times and then again on slow-mo. But I do hope we get a whistledown confrontation in the angry/sexy fashion as the book. Probably not another carriage scene but at least a confrontation in an intimate, enclosed space.

Like, there’s been a lot of angst from the first four episodes and to be honest polin didn’t get enough screen-time to touch on any of that, so I’m personally gonna hate it if the reveal is super sad and she tries to apologise and he leaves and won’t talk to her until the next episode or something.

Like, give me canonically has-a-temper-Colin-Bridgerton and I'm-not-ashamed-you-can-fight-me- penelope-featherington.

Obviously I know he needs time to process but with how little screentime they got together im hoping it can be more of a team-exercise then an estranged engagement.

Also the whole situation would just feel too similar to Marina. I think Colin being sensitive to betrayal is a good thing to explore but I just don’t see Penelope (who has recently learnt a very important lesson about lying to loved ones) wanting to keep the secret from Colin.

I understand not knowing how to tell him exactly but the teaser made it seem like she wasn’t actually planning too which is #notmypenelope. Anyway I did love part 1 so I’m not too displaced but I think dragging out the secret thing is a really pointless and wasteful storyline when lady Whistledown was in fact a big part of Colin’s realisation that he loved Penelope.

Okay ramble over.

[mitsubinyuri]

Fuck it, I'm bored.

Here's why YOU should ship Lornatz !!! 💚💜

(A needlessly long analysis)

(Note: I will be using she/they pronouns for Ignatz and he/they/she for Lorenz here because of my personal headcanons)

1) canon dynamic

I'll admit there isn't a whole lot of material for these two. We have a C-B support in the FE3H base game and an A support in Three Hopes. In their base game support, it's kind of similar to a few other Ignatz supports: Ignatz does something demonstrating her art talent/good aesthetic eye and then the other character glazes her for like 2 supports and they're like "omg haha what do you mean 😳😳 haha me really? thanks I guess..." On Lorenz's side, it's similar to a few of their other supports as well.

The support itself doesn't seem like anything special at first glance- just another case of Ignatz being all bashful and Lorenz does his "it is a nobles duty to provide guidance to those who need it" thing. Lorenz offers to take Ignatz as a knight into Gloucester service so that Ignatz may both become a knight, as her parents want, and have time to paint and work artistically.

Now, most of what I consider the substantial part of their canon relationship takes place in the spin off game. Lorenz and Ignatz's A support, given to them in Three Hopes, is a direct follow-up to the events that occurred in their C and B supports. Despite Three Hopes taking place in a different timeline, it is clear that the same general events of their storyline have taken place, and as the war begun, Ignatz has become a Gloucester knight. Regardless of route, at some point during the story, Lorenz will take up their father's place as Count Gloucester (more like Cunt Gloucester am I right cus they slay)

Now, you aren't able to unlock Lorenz and Ignatz's A support until after the game's short timeskip. After said timeskip, when everyone returns to the camp, you can talk to Ignatz, who will inform Shez that they had been traveling with Lorenz for the last few months. (At least I think I am remembering this correctly. Ignatz's camp dialogue is not fully filled in on their wiki quotes page.)

Finally, during their A support, Lorenz walks up to Ignatz, who is admiring the view. They begin to talk, and Lorenz comments on how Ignatz has grown and improved herself over the years-- from a bashful little merchant's child to a skilled leader in their role as a general in the army.

(Hubert also makes a similar comment when you fight and recruit Ignatz in Scarlet Blaze, saying something like "that ploy was very smart, we must be up against a talented commander" after Ignatz's trap is sprung. Ignatz basically says "wh-who? Me? 😳😳" after that and it's the funniest thing ever.)

Anyway, tangent aside, Lorenz compliments Ignatz's growth and also says some... definitely not gay things. (Literally one step away from calling them beautiful)

Lorenz then comments on the fact that Ignatz seems to be much happier now, compared to when they were just staying in Gloucester territory.

Ignatz reveals that the reason they have been feeling more alive is because they had been painting scenery that they viewed along their travels. The moving from place to place for various War Things(tm) may come with the unfortunate duties of battle (which Ignatz does not particularly enjoy), but still has the core travel element that Ignatz desires in their life.

It is at this point that Lorenz aplogizes. They feel as though their offer to take Ignatz into their service all those years ago was actually wrong, as what Ignatz really wanted to do was travel. In her mind, it was another Classic Lorenz Moment where she forces unwanted "help" onto someone because of perceived Noble Duty. Lorenz expresses profound regret for that action.

Ignatz responds to this by saying that Lorenz doesn't have anything to be sorry for. In fact, Ignatz meets Lorenz's guilt with gratitude for the experience they had working as a knight-- although parts of it were unenjoyable for them, it was an essential experience to them growing as a person, and it colored their perspective on life in a very real and good way.

2) analysis

Now, after my long ass summary, we move on to the deeper parts of their relationship. As a dynamic, it's not too complex, but it has enough to it for it to be interesting.

One of Lorenz's key traits is her outlook on life, mainly influenced by her father, saying that it it the duty of nobles to wield their power responsibly to help the common people. This worldview can sometimes cause conflicts in their supports (particularly, Leonie comes to mind) and due to FE3H's support system's limitations, it never really changes when it comes to how they act during the actual storyline.

This is a complaint I have with FE3H's writing but not particularly relevant to this post. And I actually think that Lorenz's Ignatz support is one of the better ones regarding this, in that Lorenz doesn't just make an "exception" from their worldview for one specific character. Lorenz regretting her original offer due to feelings of guilt around her perceiving her actions as causing unhappiness feels more natural and personal, and doesn't make it seem odd when she still says her weird, mildly problematic things about class that are baked into the main story's script.

One of Ignatz's main traits is being unsure of herself and feeling resigned to a future she knows she won't enjoy just to please her parents. In many of her supports, the latter of the traits is just addressed by her support partner saying "okay but just be an artist lol" and then her saying "okay maybe" and becoming one in whatever paired ending. Sometimes, it's not even really brought up, and her persuading her parents to let her be an artist is an afterthought in her ending card.

With Ignatz and Lorenz's supports, Ignatz actually undergoes a meaningful journey in figuring out their future. I'm not saying their other supports are bad-- I enjoy them all, and they're all unique and fun in their own ways. But in terms of addressing Ignatz's worries about their future, one of their defining traits, they can be hit or miss. I think that Lorenz's support with them is the best for this, in that is fully paints a picture of a years-long journey for Ignatz to figure out their place in the world. I truly think that this support does a lot for both of their characters.

3) fandom potential

OOH! On to the fun part: what about fanfiction? Fanart? Roleplays?

Well, I have good news for you. This ship is ESPECIALLY rich in fan material potential. As this post is already getting a little too long, I'm going to just put a bullet point list of compelling fic/art/rp ideas below.

It's finally time for Ignatz to leave Gloucester service, following their A support. Lorenz is sad and in his heart wants her to stay, but doesn't want to be an asshole when he knows Ignatz would be happier traveling.

Lorenz realizes, a year or two into Ignatz working as a knight for her father, that she is DOWN BAD. She tries to be smooth with gifts and flowers and such, and Ignatz knows the general usual connotations of such gestures but can't get herself to believe Lorenz would like her like that and tries to fight off her own crush that's now starting to develop.

Years after Ignatz leaves Gloucester service, they return to visit Lorenz and possibly paint something around the area (the gardens? Countryside? Lorenz himself?) Both of them see each other for the first time in years and mutually begin crushing on one another.

Cute few panel comic thing where Ignatz is painting in the courtyard and Lorenz looks down at them from their room (with gay intentions.) Ignatz looks up in passing, sees them, and waves. Then Lorenz is all ehadhahrhshshshs.

Also they're both transfem guys trust...

That's it! I hope I've convinced at least some of you!

[madam-whim]

The Gold Road Reveal and my thoughts on it

I’m gonna start this off by saying I love ESO. I have been playing since 2017 and I’m pretty much doing everything the game has to offer. Quests, dungeons, trials, antiquities, sometimes PvP. That being said, this post will include lots of criticism that I feel (or know) is shared by many other fans.

But first things first, let me start off by listing some of the things on yesterday’s stream that had me bouncing in my seat:

The new zone is absolutely stunning! There’s a lot of variety to it and it does look very pretty. Exploring it will undoubtedly be fun and a feast for my eyes.

Also, Fennorian will be there, so I know there will at least be one well-written character that my Vestige has an actual bond with.

The scribing system being more of a roleplay thing – I don’t know what some people were hoping for, but I’m glad it’s not some Big Damage For Those Who Are Good At Maths kind of system. It still allows for a more unique playstyle, and I suppose it’s going to turn out like always: Do whatever you want in open world spaces, but keep your bow backflip heal out of veteran content.

And maybe the biggest “Yes!” moment of the evening: Ed Stark being the zone lead for Gold Road. While I did not like High Isle as much (too predictable for my taste, but at least it had recurring characters), he was responsible for Greymoor and Murkmire as well. I thought Greymoor was fantastic (good quests, excellent new characters alongside very familiar recurring ones), and Murkmire… well, I think Murkmire suffers greatly from being “the DLC that came after the Daedric Triad” so to speak. It kind of fell into the void created by a storyline spanning a full year (or even more, if you count the setup for the whole thing, which really began with the Varen’s ghost and Darien’s letter in Wrothgar and the Gold Coast sweetroll killer quests). I think that’s why lots of people don’t seem to like Murkmire very much despite it having great storytelling. My point is this: I do have some hope that after the fiasco some recent DLCs were story-wise, Ed Stark will at least make sure Gold Road makes sense.

And now for the criticism.

Ithelia’s design (Whenever, wherever, I want to kill Hermaeus…)

… yeah, about that. As one of my friends put it, she looks like Shakira with wings.

They really could have done so much better. The way she is now, as @akaviri-dovah said, she really just looks like a Meridia clone who somehow stole Jyggalag’s crystals, which is funny on so many levels (more on that later). Suffice it to say that I personally think the design choices are kind of lazy, given that we already have an angelic-looking Daedric lady.

Also, what’s with this picture? This kinda makes it seem as if she originally looked. Um. A lil different from the way she is now. In any case, I’m just gonna call this a missed opportunity for something more unique. I do like the glass shard aesthetic, I just wish they’d taken it in a different direction.

Dragon Break Princess Ithelia, or something like that

Now I know Dragon Breaks have to work differently from what Ithelia does, but I am kind of wondering what the consequences of her fate-altering abilities are. How do you alter fate in a way that threatens reality (with reality consisting of past and present events, with all possible versions of the future being possibly-real until one actually happens) without altering the timeline? Just by removing a possible future? Then one could argue that any Daedra could do the same just by manipulating people. Granted, it’s possible that Ithelia sees all possible futures and can do whatever she likes with them, but even then, she’d only be influencing what can become reality, not what already is. So how can she be THAT dangerous?

Right now, it just seems to me that they needed an adversary for Hermaeus Mora, and since his big things are knowledge, secrets and fate, and they couldn’t very well make a Daedric Prince of Anti-Intellectualism or a Daedric Prince of Snitching, she had to be a fate-altering type of Daedra.

At this point I’m still wondering how she even works, because how does she not accidentally cause Dragon Breaks? And if she is that damn powerful, how on earth did Mora alone manage to pretty much remove any trace of her? Which kind of brings me to my next point.

Memory Issues

I know, I know, Ithelia is not the first “new” Daedric Prince. (Which makes her stolen Jyggalag crystal vibes rather funny if you ask me.) And I don’t mind her being crazy powerful either, because so was Jyggalag or else he wouldn’t have been cursed. But that, to my knowledge, required several other Princes, whereas Ithelia apparently got owned by Hermaeus Mora alone, who then erased all memory of her. Which is not only quite the feat given how powerful she has to be, but also a very weird thing for Hermaeus Mora to do. I kinda thought stealing memories was more Meridia’s style. This entire part does not quite make sense to me yet and seems a little out of character, but well. By the way, speaking of Meridia…

Meridia-baiting the players

At this point, ZOS have to know we’re getting tired of waiting for villain Meridia. Everyone I know who is even the least bit interested in ESO’s storyline wants to see it. And I’ve seen people get their hopes up in recent days (new Meridia/Dawnbreaker-themed music box, the Ayleid ruin hint on the fragments sent to streamers…). Even in the twitch chat, there were people hyped about what they thought was Meridia, and who were disappointed when they were told it was Ithelia. And yes, I am absolutely saying they did this and made her a Meridia lookalike on purpose. But I’m well aware that we haven’t gotten any new hints about either Meridia or a certain someone since Greymoor, and that chapter will be four years old soon. Even I am beginning to give up, as much as I hate to say it.

By the way, I really did NOT appreciate Matt Firor name-dropping Darien right at the beginning. If you’re not planning to do anything with him, just let it go. I know absolutely nobody who appreciates being fed very tiny hints for two years and then being left in the dark for four years straight. If you don’t want to pick that storyline up again, just stuff the man into the Old Life quest and be done with it.

Honestly, once again, I’m gonna say this is a MASSIVE missed opportunity right here. ESO’s 10 year anniversary is coming up, what could possibly be better than to go back to the roots now and reward all those loyal players with the story they are waiting for? I distinctly recall Molag Bal telling me to watch my step around Meridia, and the setup is all there. I’m honestly disappointed that there is no Meridia content at all. And this ties in with my final point, albeit vaguely.

“Recurring” characters

Ah, yes, we do love recurring characters. Sometimes. We do love it when a fan favorite comes back – a character who’s accompanied the Vestige over the course of an entire story arc or has made multiple appearances over the years and has become beloved by many players, and, most importantly, who is well-written, i.e. has a unique personality. And that’s why “recurring characters” is not always a recipe for success when it comes to getting people hooked on a story.

It is when it’s one of the five companions, or a Ravenwatch member, or your main alliance buddy (Raz, Naryu and – oh, wait, yeah, us Covenant babies don’t have one anymore). It also works when it’s a character we’ve run across several times already, like Alchemy, who I know tons of people love, or my favorite walking disaster Revus Demnevanni.

But it’s certainly not working when it’s a character we barely know anything about, and who isn’t a hit with the community. Like Eveli’s brother whom I had to google because I could not remember who he was. He’s from a prologue quest. Nothing more. That’s not a “beloved returning character”.

ZOS have several of those just lying around, and they’re just not using them. And even the base game had so many characters that were there over the course of several zones, that were well-written and at least memorable to the degree that people would recognize them with just a little reminder, like Indaenir or Holgunn and Walks-in-Ash or the Vanos siblings. Hell, we haven't seen good old Vanus Galerion in a while. They are ten years old now and deserve to be dragged to the surface again.

Okay, I’m done now!

This concludes my rant (because that’s what it is, I’m aware). I just want to say again that this is not be dragging ESO through the mud, this is just me pointing out that the devs (especially the writers) could do so much better if they listened to their lore nerds and story-interested players more.

[fyodcrs]

BSD 111.5: A Complaint (again)

All right. So.

I have criticized the S5 finale extensively, and now that the manga is following the same storyline almost exactly, I feel I want to air my grievances one last time, because it's just so bad. At least in my humble yet correct opinion (to quote Fyodor from the BSD dub). And it only gets worse the more I think about it. 

The writing here is...not good. I’m talking about the big “Chuuya was never a vampire to begin with” reveal, the retconned hand injury and what absolute contrived nonsense that is - and most of all, I’m talking about Dazai’s speech about why he “won” the "game," and how it makes no actual sense because what he says happened is not what actually happened. 

All of this is stuff I've talked about in other posts (I'll be repeating myself a lot here), but I really want to focus on Dazai's speech and why I just. Don't like it.

"You don't trust anything you can't control," Dazai tells Fyodor.

This is supposed to be the reason Dazai "wins": because he trusts people, and Fyodor does not. He relies on others he considers friends; Fyodor just uses others that he considers pawns.

And this is fine in theory. Indeed, it's been heavily foreshadowed. Personally, I think "Dazai wins because he has friends, Fyodor loses because he doesn't" is a super boring way to go with both Fyodor's character and with the conflict between him and Dazai, but whatever, we all knew something like this would be the reason for the ADA's victory over the DOA. Theoretically, it makes sense.

Except, it doesn't actually work the way they did it. It doesn't work because Fyodor's plan apparently hinges on the vampires, and Fyodor does not actually have control over the vampires.

In fact, Fyodor does not have direct control over any aspect of the Decay of Angels plot.

Fukuchi does.

First of all, the Decay of Angels plot doesn't begin until after Fyodor is already in prison. Fyodor is not the one who writes on the Page, and Fyodor is not the one in possession of the Page. Fyodor is also not the one who is in possession of Bram. All of this falls to Fukuchi.

Now, there is one interesting scene where Fyodor tells Dazai that he "added a line to the page":

But - unless I have my timeline mixed up - since the Page was not stolen and used until after Fyodor was sent to prison, this only suggests he told Fukuchi what to write. There is still no point where he actually had possession of the Page himself.

Fyodor is the one who set up the entire plot and arranged for all the pieces to be in place, but once it actually starts to unfold, he is no longer in a position to directly manipulate his pawns, because he's locked up underground thousands of miles away.

Of course, this does not mean he has been removed from play entirely; he is still communicating with the outside, and he is still able to manipulate the course of events to some extent, as we see when he (somehow; it's never explained) killed the pilots so Fukuchi could get his hands on the One Order:

But how is this any different from what Dazai is doing? Dazai lets himself be captured and locked away, too, to keep an eye on Fyodor and read his moves as things unfold on the outside. He is also in communication with his allies, and he is also able to do some string-pulling, as we see when he stops Fyodor's assassination attempt on Fitzgerald and the neutralization of the Eyes of God:

Basically, both Fyodor and Dazai have the same level of control over what is happening.

Dazai being superior to Fyodor because he "simply had faith" in Ranpo (and the rest of the ADA) implies that Fyodor did not have faith in Fukuchi. But that implies that Fyodor had some means of direct control over Fukuchi throughout the unfolding of the DOA plan and therefore did not have to leave anything solely in Fukuchi's hands. Or it implies that Fyodor had a plan independent of Fukuchi. Except he didn't. On both accounts. At least not that we know of.

In fact, in the anime (which I assume will be repeated in the manga in later chapters), Fukuchi says that Fyodor didn't have any direct control. Fukuchi tells Fukuzawa that he had Fyodor sent to prison for the purpose of preventing him from interfering in Fukuchi's actual plan. And Fyodor agreed to this. He got himself arrested on purpose. The reason he does this is suggested to be that the prison is essentially the safest hideout in the world. Except Fukuchi tells us that this action also severely hindered - though not outright neutralized - Fyodor's ability to influence events.

And I'm not trying to downplay Fyodor as the spider at the center of a complex web of manipulation, not at all. I'm simply pointing out that: a) Dazai is exactly the same, and is countering Fyodor move-for-move, and b) the plan still heavily relies on Fukuchi's independent actions.

As I mentioned, the DOA plot doesn't begin until after Fyodor is arrested and sent to Meursault. Fyodor was using vampires planted as guards as his means of communication (which doesn't even make sense itself, because when exactly would this have happened? When does Fyodor communicate with these vamps? Why did Dazai not notice this?), but Fyodor himself is not controlling those guards, Fukuchi is. Because Fukuchi is the one in control of Bram, and the vampires can only be controlled through Bram. It is certainly conceivable that Fyodor might have had these guards planted before his arrest, but the vampires are only usable as pawns as long as Fukuchi has control of Bram, or at least as long as Bram isn't in control of himself.

Using Chuuya as a pawn also requires Fukuchi to be in control of Bram. Therefore, Fyodor's entire escape plan relies on Fukuchi.

Fyodor literally cannot do anything with the vampires without Fukuchi. And if his entire plan rested on the vampires, that means his entire plan rested on Fukuchi.

In other words, Fyodor's entire plan rests on him having faith in Fukuchi.

It doesn't matter that Fyodor and Fukuchi are not "friends"; it doesn't matter that Fyodor thinks of Fukuchi as a "pawn" instead of an "ally" (although I should note we've been given no evidence of this, because we have never actually seen them interact and we don't know their relationship; we're just meant to assume this). The point is that Fyodor structured this plan of his to be centered around the actions of someone else. This is no different from Dazai. In fact, this is how the both of them usually operate. They just tend to have different ways of going about manipulating their "pawns"/"allies."

Then there's the "hand full of uncertainties" line:

How, exactly, was Dazai's hand "full of uncertainties" in a way that Fyodor's wasn't? How exactly did Fyodor have "the world in the palm of his hand" in a way that Dazai didn't? How exactly was Fyodor in more control of what was happening than Dazai was? As I've already pointed out, what we've been shown suggests they both had equal measures of influence on the outside, and therefore equal levels of manipulative power and equal amounts of uncertainties.

In fact, if we are to believe that Fyodor was surprised by Nikolai and Sigma, that was a whole hell of a lot of uncertainties being thrown at him. And just like Dazai, he just ran with it.

And the reality is that Dazai actually had a whole hell of a lot less uncertainties than Fyodor did, and a whole hell of a lot more control, because Chuuya was never a vampire to begin with. The moment Chuuya arrived, Dazai had the upper hand. It's not like he was ever in any actual danger from the point Chuuya showed up. He was in full control of the situation from that point on.

And you can say that's the whole point, Dazai was in control because he had an ally, but the point I'm making is that the only control Fyodor thought he had over the situation was also because of an ally that he believed he had. If he believed he was controlling Chuuya, he also had to believe that Fukuchi still had Bram and was still on his side. He was operating on faith in pretty much the exact same way Dazai was.

You can also argue that Chuuya showing up was proof for Fyodor that Fukuchi was still in control of Bram (even though he wasn't by that point) and that things were going according to plan. But I'd counter-argue that if at any point before Fyodor managed to escape Bram had had his will restored, Fyodor would have been fucked (had Chuuya actually been a vampire). The very act of using Chuuya as a pawn was a huge act of faith on Fyodor's part.

It's important to stress here that Fukuchi was not under Fyodor's "control" at any point, at least not so far as we've been shown. He is not brainwashed like Nathaniel. He is also not a throwaway piece. He is vital to the plan. And he has his own motivations. We aren't quite there yet in the manga, but we know from the anime what Fukuchi actually wanted, and we also know from the anime that Fyodor approached Fukuchi and propositioned him. They made a deal. Of course, Fyodor always had his own plan, but he knew what Fukuchi's real motivations were. Even so, he trusted that Fukuchi would carry out the plan as he instructed, at least so far as we've been shown.

The argument can be made that Fyodor doesn’t actually have any trust in Fukuchi, he simply trusts that he knows exactly how Fukuchi will act and that everything will go as he predicted. But how is that any different from Dazai? Ranpo negotiating with Bram and Bram ordering the vampires to attack Fyodor might not have been something Dazai and Ranpo set up beforehand, but it is certainly something Dazai planned for, because he purposefully set Fyodor up to be in a vulnerable position, anticipating that exact scenario. Again, they are both operating in the same exact way: not directly controlling their allies, but assuming that their allies will act as they expect. The only difference is that Fyodor’s “allies” did not meet his expectations and Dazai’s did.

I get that the point of this is supposed to be that Fyodor is undone by his cruel manipulation of others and his ruthless attempts to impose his own order upon the world. And that's fine. It's good, even!

The problem is...that's not what happened. Fyodor lost because he relied on something that was outside of his direct control: the vampires. Fyodor lost because he put too much control in the hands of Fukuchi.

And this in itself is a problem, because Fyodor should not have so heavily relied on Fukuchi. All of this would work for me just fine if everything didn't revolve around the goddamn vampires. You cannot have Fyodor's entire fucking plan hinge on the vampires, over which only Bram and the person who has possession of Bram have any control, and then try and tell me that Fyodor lost because he didn't have faith in people. Why would he use the vampires at all if he had no faith in Fukuchi?? Why would he get into a helicopter with the vampires piloting if he had no faith Fukuchi was still his ally and Bram was still under Fukuchi's control?? Why would he have agreed to go to prison in the first place if he had no trust in Fukuchi????? It doesn't make any sense.

And don’t try to tell me, “Well, Fyodor’s just arrogant.” That is the laziest fucking excuse you could possibly give to justify why Fyodor’s IQ points have been cut in half this arc. And, for the thousandth time I ask—how is this any different from Dazai, who also just assumed everything would go his way? Why is it "faith" when it's Dazai but it's arrogance when it's Fyodor?

Personally, I think BSD made a massive narrative mistake in putting Fyodor and Dazai in Meursault in the first place. It's over-complicated things.

Also, one thing that really bothers me about all this is that it's supposed to be a big character moment for Dazai, but...I don't see how this is any different from how he usually operates. Hell, this ruse Dazai and Chuuya set up is even something that SKK did before when they were a team in the Mafia. We've seen Dazai do this shit a thousand times. What's supposed to be the big deal here? The fact that he made a friendship speech this time?

It's just fallen really flat to me, and that's a bummer because I think Dazai is one of the most well-written and interesting characters I've ever come across, and I want to see great character development for him.

I've complained endlessly about Chuuya being in a Halloween costume the entire time so I'll just say here that it's really fucking dumb that Fyodor just. Didn't notice. That he was fooled by fake fangs and contact lenses. Dazai would have noticed, if their roles were reversed. Ranpo would have noticed. It really is just a case of Fyodor being made stupid out of nowhere so Dazai could win.

The retconned hand injury is also incredibly dumb, because first of all, in the manga it didn't exist until the last two chapters when it needed to exist. And second of all, the hand is clearly shown to be usable after the incident that is supposed to have injured it so severely that Fyodor needs the vampires - who, again, are not under his direct control - to pilot the helicopter so he can escape, and this is true for both the manga and the anime. It conveniently only becomes a problem when Dazai needs it to. Because plot, I guess. Because the universe is chaos unless Dazai is pulling another deus ex machina.

I really hate being so critical and so negative, especially about BSD, because it's been my favorite series for years now. But ever since the S5 finale I've been finding more and more things about this arc and it's conclusion (?) that make no sense to me. And considering that Fyodor and Dazai are my favorite characters and a large part of the reason I'm invested in this story, to see them both so poorly handled has left a very bad taste in my mouth.

In conclusion:

[bubblesxo]

i dont know if you will see this but i am a big fan of your g!bruce meets the batfam!!!! I literally have tumblr just for this series (and now that I’ve tried it im beginning to love it ngl) . Annyywaayy ive just read the new chapter and it’s so good!?? Like i am really excited for the next chapter!!!

Oh and I haven’t watched gotham ( im planning too ) but i sometimes mix the twins????? Like your explanations are good dont get me wrong but yk when your reading and you need to check which ones which? Yeah … and like i want to fix that idk how .do i just like memorize the twins personalitys??

also in this au is theres 2 jokers??????? I saw you once mention Jerome(?) being revived or something

ps .im that great at English sorry .

oh wow wow wow thank you so so much!! i'm really glad that you're enjoying my story so much! it really means a lot to me. <33 i think your english is good! but if you need/want me to clarify anything i say here, just let me know and i'll try to rephrase it for you!

okay, so in the Gotham tv show (this has spoilers for all 5 seasons, so read on if you're okay with that) the way that they approached writing the joker was actually really up in the air in the beginning. this is because they didn't have the rights to use the name "joker," and so fox (the company that made the show) planned on making a bunch of smaller characters in the show as a kind of easter egg as people who could be the joker or who resemble him in some way.

this changed when cameron monaghan (the actor for both jerome and jeremiah) guest starred in s1e16 "the blind fortune teller." in it, the character of jerome is introduced as a 17/18 year old boy who travels with the circus with his mother, who is a snake dancer. he is meant to be one of the aforementioned joker-like characters in the show and wasn't actually supposed to be included again after that episode, if i am not mistaken.

however, the viewers LOVED his performance and jerome came back in season two as a member of the maniax, a group of arkham inmates who were broken out of the asylum. i won't go too into detail about the actual plot, but in seasons two, three, and four, jerome shows up in at least a few different episodes with very memorable storylines each time.

it isn't until season four of the show that jeremiah is even revealed at all! jeremiah and jerome are identical twin brothers, however, jeremiah has been in hiding for years under the fake name "xander wilde" in an attempt to escape jerome, who wants to get revenge on him for lying to their mother about what he (jerome) did when they were children. basically, jeremiah lied to their mother (lila, who jerome is revealed to have killed in 1x16) that jerome tried to kill him, causing jeremiah to be sent away and be adopted by rich people and get to go to a well-funded private school where he could live out his best life as a child prodigy (which was jeremiah's end goal to this), whereas jerome was left behind in the circus that they lived at (haly's circus, the same one that dick grayson later was raised in before being adopted by bruce). during this time, jerome was horrifically abused by his mother, his uncle, and his mother's many romantic partners. this eventually caused him to crack, which creates the character we see in the show.

here's an easy way to remember the difference in their personalities:

in the standard american deck of cards, there are two jokers: one that is black and white and one that is in color. in this analogy, jeremiah is the black and white joker and jerome is the one in color.

this is jerome:

he's got a *very* boisterous personality. he's outgoing and charismatic and, of course, severely messed up in the head. he *enjoys* the pain he causes people and does it with little to no reservations. he thinks things through less thoroughly than jeremiah but jerome always has a plan and is actually quite smart. i couldn't do him the disservice of calling him the dumb twin, despite some points about jeremiah that i'll get back to later.

anyway, jerome has a grand plan for all of gotham: he believes that, fundamentally, everyone in the world is like him and is also at least a bit crazy inside. he wants everyone to tap into their inner selves and let themselves run free / go crazy. he successfully ensnares huge hoards of gothamites with his persuasive way of speaking and interesting flare to his words. he amasses a large cult following, all of whom are very similar to him in the sense that they all demonstrate similar signs of instability.

here's some more gifs of him.

jerome kind of invented the iconic "HAHAHA" signature joker laugh in the gotham universe, even though he isn't the one who goes on to become "mr. j" (gotham's version of the joker) in the end (that's jeremiah, though i have a lot to say about that).

jerome's always smiling, a genuinely creepy smile that throws people off at first but can be really scary once you know what you're looking at. he single handedly turns gotham into a madhouse on multiple occasions and is the one who basically spread the "crazy" to the general population (for short: genpop).

he's a classic cult leader in the sense that he can mesmerize a whole room with his magnetic presence but also will ruthlessly cut down any of his followers if they so much as upset him (or even if they're just being annoying or could have a greater purpose, like when he stabbed a follower in the gut to take their blood to draw a frowney-face on bruce).

that reminds me, another important thing to know about jerome is that he has an iconic stapled-on face! this is because he died once (in season two, though he came back to life for season three onwards) and one of his followers tried to revive him using some insider medical knowledge from doctor hugo strange (who is just... a whole thing. ew.). he thinks that he failed at doing this and steals jerome's face so that he can wear it on television in an attempt to control jerome's followers (spoiler: this doesn't work).

however, it turns out that jerome *was* revived from this, and he's pretty upset that some dude stole his face! so he uses a staple gun to re-attach it after he gets it back (and kills the guy who did it). his face is later punched off by jim gordon but reattached more properly during his time at arkham afterward (the carnival scene happened in season 3 and jerome came back with a kind-of healed face in season 4).

here's some gifs with jerome's messed up face!

jerome is the colorful joker because he's very much expressive. he lets out every single emotion he feels---unless he's trying to deceive someone, at which point he is a phenomenal liar. (in season 1 when we are first introduced to him, he almost successfully gets away with the murder of his own mother.)

jerome is funny and laughs a lot and is *loud.* he's also absolutely insane and incredibly cruel, as well as impulsive, but he's able to curb his instincts if he feels like he can pull off a big plan.

jerome is a showman by nature. he's a product of the circus and it *shows.* everything he does is like an act, something that is acknowledged by many people in the show.

he's a funky lil dude. totally crazy, but kind of adorable at times.

he's also SEVERELY traumatized from his horrible past and has huge trust issues.

so, yeah. jerome is colors! remember that.

unfortunately, pookie died in season 4 and doesn't seem to have been revived this time </3

now, onto his twin brother jeremiah!

jeremiah is, at least at first, presented to be the complete opposite of jerome. he's calm, collected, and seemingly sane---at least at first. bruce trusts him at first and he even befriends him for a period of time before jeremiah betrays him.

jeremiah is a genius engineer, and, when looking into his past, we can assume that he was a child prodigy. he worked with thomas wayne before he died and designed the wayne plaza building under the aforementioned alias "xander wilde." he also locked himself in an underground maze for ~6 years (i believe?) and never went outside, instead sending his proxy (ecco) out to act in his place during business transactions.

as seen here, jeremiah seems to be the complete opposite of showboat jerome:

when we first meet jeremiah, we are told that he is totally sane, but we can later see that this is not the complete truth.

i'll use jeremiah's project as a metaphor for this. jeremiah was building a set of generators which could make energy harvesting and usage much less expensive and much more bio-friendly (if i remember correctly). bruce promised to fund his project and jeremiah accepts his offer quickly.

after jerome dies in season 4 after kidnapping bruce and jeremiah, he left behind a concoction of chemicals that seemingly make jeremiah go insane. this is a play on joker toxin / joker venom from the greater dc universe.

however, after jeremiah reveals his new self

he says that the spray did not actually change who he actually is, but just gave him an altered appearance. there are a lot of fan theories about this, but the general consensus is that the spray likely lowered his inhibitions, which gave him the kick needed to reveal his true self.

even his complexion resembles the joker he corresponds with: black and white. he is the black and white joker because he isn't as expressive, is way more calculated, and is more cruel and less happy. even his skin is paper white.

here's some gifs of what he looks like after those "slight cosmetic changes" :

that looks a lot more like the joker we know and love today, right? bleach-pale skin, red painted lips, green hair. he's instantly recognizable as the stereotypical joker now.

remember when i mentioned the generators? let's go back to them. the entire time that the generators have been around, they've also been perfectly functional as powerful bombs. their ability to be used as bombs does not undermine the fact that they can also be used as generators, and both of these things were true at the same time *for the entire time they have existed.*

it is in this way that jeremiah's paradoxical nature has always existed. jeremiah is crafty, cunning, and absolutely vicious. he has no care or concern for human life in general and will sacrifice most people in his life if it means that he will get what he wants in the end.

this is shown both before and after the joker toxin in how he lied about jerome when they were children (which caused jerome to be heavily abused) and in how jeremiah willingly killed one of his most devoted and beloved followers, who was being ransomed, just because someone put him on hold and it was personally easier for him to just kill him than sit on hold on the phone for a while. (he also has a vicious streak, though, because he immediately moved the demolition of the bombs up to immediately once he was out of the blast zone because those people inconvenienced him.)

something that's important to realize about jeremiah is that he has an issue with being called crazy. jerome does, too, but he eventually comes to accept the term, almost like he's reclaiming it, but jeremiah is *violently* against it. that's one of the things that set him off in the previously mentioned interaction.

both jeremiah and jerome are obsessed with bruce, though in different ways. jeremiah sees bruce first as his best friend and later as the "brother [he] could never have, that jerome could never be." jerome just sees bruce as a particularly entertaining and interesting kid who he enjoyed tormenting who he would eventually kill.

anyway, despite jeremiah being crazy (or, depending on who you ask, just less inhibited) he is still crazy smart and calculating. he thinks through everything before he does it and his master plans seem like they go on forever with 10000 parts to them and backups and contingencies galore.

the only time that jeremiah ever really seems to break out of this is when he's fighting with bruce. while he still does have a greater point to make or something he's trying to accomplish, he thinks through things less with him and shows his impulsive and rash side a bit more, which is interesting because jerome showed his thoughtful and contemplative side when faced with the obstacle that is bruce thomas wayne. i love parallels and contrasts, especially in these two characters! i just love writing about twins, they're always so interesting.

some important things about their relationship to one another:

even though jerome kidnapped jeremiah and seemingly strapped a bomb to his neck (after breaking into his house and telling him that he would kill him), jerome doesn't seem to actually want jeremiah to die. instead, as we later find out, he wants jeremiah to unleash his true self and carry on his legacy of chaos and cruelty in gotham for him after his death. this is why he left behind the laughing gas for him.

(the fact that jerome thought to do all of that shows that he really was a smart character and that he truly did understand the world around him well. he knew exactly what would happen in the event of his death, i.e. bruce offering to fund jeremiah's work and jeremiah accepting, as is shown when jerome has the joker venom in a present box which claims to be sent from wayne enterprises.)

jeremiah *hates* to be compared to jerome in any way, as he thinks of himself as "the face of true sanity." he actually has an entire notebook full of jerome's ideas, which he says he will outdo and perfect, thus defeating his brother in the end, which i don't know if i agree with, but whatever.

i think that it's because of the reputation that jerome got at the circus. jeremiah wanted people to think of him as better than jerome and as the perfect child, which he succeeded at. to him, jerome is synonymous with crazy, which i've already mentioned that he hates to be called.

okay, just one more part to talk about. the infamous, much anticipated Mr. J!!!

in the series finale, it is revealed that jeremiah, after falling into a vat of acid, is horribly disfigured and pretends to be in a vegetative state for the whole ten years that bruce is on his quest to improve himself before becoming batman. he does this as a way of waiting for bruce to come back to gotham so he can continue to be obsessed with him.

however, though this is jeremiah, it seems that he has actually gone through immense mental trauma sometime during this time (perhaps during his fall into a vat of chemicals), which has caused him to sort of lose his sense of self. he once says that there was "another me" [another him] once, which is, of course, referring to jerome. this implies that jeremiah sees jerome as an extension of himself, almost, and almost makes it seem as if mr. j is a whole different entity of his own.

hopefully this clears everything up a bit for you!! let me know if you have any questions or want to know anything specific about the characters and i will be glad to oblige!

thank you once again for being so kind as to leave this ask!! it really made my day. thank you for enjoying my fic, i hope it continues to live up to expectations. i have a lot of fun things planned (and i am very happy that you decided to look into these characters more, because they are actually extremely important to the plot as we get more into the actual story!). <33