#as someone who occasionally uses a Mac. its bad
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Switching to Linux hot take:
Recovering windows users shouldn't switch to a "windows-like" DE. Give them something totally alien like GNOME or Budgie. Likewise, we should recommend ex Mac users KDE or Cinnamon.
Reason: Linux is not the same as those OSes. Its imitations of their interfaces are incomplete, so it will feel like a knockoff.
A new GUI paradigm sets Linux apart in the mind and encourages learning. Then once the user is proficient in customizing their desktop, they can bring back the features they valued in those systems.
#have you ever tried PearOS#as someone who occasionally uses a Mac. its bad#KDE skin with the barest veneer. but basically no research#for example. the macos default terminal is an 80x24 box with exactly 1 titlebar#meanwhile PearOS keeps the Konsole default which is tons of buttons and drop down menus. and the font it way too big#ugh it just. feel is all wrong#this is also true of WinFX btw#mir rants#linux#Linux take#desktop environment
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i dunno if this has been asked before, but i kinda wanted to splurge a little bit.
how and where does azure lion and the other animal celestials play a part in the BEW au? or even TAB AU. my personal idea on it could be that azure uses reader kind of as leverage against wukong, while as in TAB maybe reader is used to cause a rift between the brothers so that azure has an easier time murking wukong.
alright, so. the big bad brotherhood. they mostly just play the part of extra soldiers and sovereigns in wukongs conquests, his own little war council. im gonna go with the idea that the betrayal hasn't happened, since wukong doesn't get recruited by heaven in the base versions of these aus
(ive said before that, at least in bad end, the brotherhood wouldn't bother with reader too much. buuuut i don't think i specified what they're like in TAB and their reaction to their comrades marrying reader.)
peng (the bitch) doesn't much care for reader. they wonder why the all-powerful wukong is bothering with a human. they likely make a snide comment or two when wukong first introduces her to them at a meeting, which wukong (and macaque) immediately shut down with threats of violence. mac especially doesn't tolerate peng being an ass to his wife; his hatred for the winged menace is potent. luckily the bird demon is catty, not stupid; and surprisingly, they learn to keep their beak shut about their leader's wife. this leads to them largely ignoring her. reader doesn't like them much either, but tries to be polite.
yellowtusk feels pity for reader. he knows she didn't exactly become queen of flower fruit mountain willingly, and believes that she would be happier with other humans. but he's not called "wise" for nothing; he won't be lifting a finger to help her. even as strong as he is, he knows he stands no chance against the two simian warlords. regardless, he's polite to reader and will speak with her about the various topics that she's read about. he's a surprisingly good conversationalist.
demon bull king is ambivalent towards reader. he knows what it's like to want someone outside your station, so he doesn't say anything negative to wukong about it. he'll speak to reader if she speaks to him, and is overall polite (seeing as she is technically a queen and he has a lot of respect for wukong), if not very gruff when doing so.
azure lion is the only one who would be actively kind to reader, the only one who would speak with her like a true equal. despite his status as a once-celestial soldier, demonic sovereign, and a general of the infamous monkey kings' demon army...he still has a soft spot for mortal civilians. if a platoon of the monkey king's army is passing through, one would hope that he's leading it. less innocent blood is spilt when the lion general is at the helm.
its because of this that he was concerned when wukong introduced reader to him. what was a human doing on flower fruit mountain? she's married to the monkey king? she seemed...very uncomfortable in the presence of her husband. the lion demon knows that she was likely frightened by the two monkey warlords' use of "demonic courting tactics" and introduced himself gently. the fact that she responded to him (considering his size and appearance) without too much hesitancy, was able to bow politely and look him in the eyes despite all she'd likely been through at the hands of his brothers–he couldn't help but admire her bravery.
azure is aware that his sworn simian brothers are unconventional in many aspects of their life, so the fact that the two of them would marry a human (the same human, no less) isn't too surprising. the two are of one mind, and azure has made a tentative peace with the ruthless way his brothers conduct their business.
...but he can't help but feel sympathy for reader. she didn't choose this life for herself, though he can see the lingering affection she has for wukong and macaque. and once he gets to know her (an occasional talk outside the council room while the warlords are busy discussing strategy, a close seating at a banquet, or during a party on the mountain), azure begins to understand why they chose this woman. a fondness grows in his heart for the quiet human who is kind to him despite knowing what he's done.
he won't say it aloud, but...had it been him who'd been found and tended to by reader, azure couldn't be sure he wouldn't have made the same choice as his brothers.
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Your argument is that he “fell off.” But considering he currently breaking records for a charting song proves other wise. Thats all I am saying.
tl;dr: i miss when jack harlow was on that dorky white-boy hip hop swag type shit, similar to mac miller, without being disrespectful
music brain rot because i'm teaching myself to learn how to produce music for college application purposes
okay yeah no i completely get that, he's doing really well music chart topping wise (is there an actual word for that idk), it just feels like the quality of music (from my standpoint, and i was also someone who could identify what pac and biggie sounded like before i knew wtf the alphabet was so i may full and well be biased) kinda declined. i feel like we watching a post malone type jawn all over again, like he kinda used the hip-hop sound to get recognition (?) and then kinda drifted into pop???? idk lovin on me is very shopping background music-y idk if that makes sense but that's just what it sounds like. like im saying mans occasionally drops something that has me like 'well... shit i guess white men CAN jump' (im sorry that was a bad joke but very much needed). like that whole luv is dro, already best friends, whats poppin era did him so good and i think that's an era that he needs to return to. like that specific sound did him so good like, he js has that dope-ass white boy swag that we ain't really seen since mac miller and boy do we need that back, and the sounds he was using (bass heavy type shit(i might be dragging it but yk what i mean), light synth kinda). and it could js be 100% that he was working a lot more w/ statik (hope he's doing better)
dont get me wrong i still stream the songs i like but he js isn't as appealing as he was w the records he's currently putting out. and its not to say that people shouldn't aim to express themselves artistically and experiment with who they are, its just (from my standpoint) that by going in the complete opposite direction rather than experimenting with different subgenres of hip hop (there's a lot, s/o my extra credit research paper) he lost a pretty big demographic of listeners
thats all :)
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@badtrigger : send me ‘👀’ for something my muse has said about yours to someone else / when they’re not around. // bri about mac ~ ft. gansukh ✿
What a strange lady. The stocky privateer thinks as he trudges behind Rooks’ occasional visitor. Hard not to be baffled by how measured her gait keeps in a pair of squeaky clean “city boots” despite her petite form being burdened with so many bags. A carry-on suitcase rolls at her side with a tote bag attached to its top, a backpack on her back, and a large shopping tote filled with several boxes in one hand. If that wasn’t enough, he’s carrying another of her belongings to the helipad, a heavy cardboard box.
With every step, whatever's inside clanks, and more so when he sets it down on a nearby crate. The sound prompts Brianne to scurry over and take a worried peek under the lid just to make sure none of the bottles cracked en route. What a spicy mess that would make. With all appearing intact, it’s without hesitance that she takes one out and offers it to her impromptu porter.
“Here.” Concern dissipates and is replaced with a grateful smile. “It's not much but, a thank you for your assistance. It’s hot sauce if you fancy it.” A popular South Asian brand of chili table sauce that she brought to pass out to the pirates on the North Island — a little gift to build rapport among Montenegro's cutthroat crew (easier said than done).
Gansukh wouldn’t say no to a gift and so he accepts it, even if his brow furls in question. After a brief peruse of the double red flame design on the label, he lifts a curious stare at her. “So ah. This a whole case of the same then?”
“Yes, uhm.” Stilted she starts, hands wringing at her front. “It’s for the men up north. I hand them out.”
“Ah. Those some lucky guys, hey?” Joking reply sits just shy of asking why she didn’t bring a case for the men here.
At least that is what Brianne assumes, even if she shouldn’t need to explain her rationale (she does deal with Mister Montenegro more than she does Mister Volker after all). Shoulders tense as she manages a defense anyway. “Well. They really don’t have the supplies you boys do. And their food is surprisingly worse.” If she’s to be honest, there’s a clear distinction between the South and the North in more ways than this. The infrastructure just isn’t there and all of it seems unreasonable considering they are on the frontlines with the indigenous inhabitants.
With lips pursed, the privateer gives her a series of accepting nods. That’s fine if she thinks that, but he can’t let something else she said stand. “C’mon now. Worse there maybe, but the food here, not so bad if you ask me.”
While spoken lightly, that wasn't the kickback Brianne expected. She tries to erase her faux pas with a chuckle. “Oh. You're probably right.” Sight instinctively turns to search in the direction the helicopter usually flies in. Is it late?
He knows it’s time to get back to his post, but the man can’t help but think of his best friend. Gotta get a read on this fancy chic. “So ah," he begins, rubbing his stubbly chin, "You think you can spare a second for my buddy?”
“Your buddy?” Sight drags back with the unnecessary question riding on an held exhale. She knows who he means. Mac Mays, the chatty blonde chef she met on her first day here in the canteen.
“Yeah, you know, Mays. He’d actually be able to put it to use being a chef and all.”
“Uh.” Some discomfort has her shifting the position of the shopping tote next to her luggage. It holds Mister Montenegro’s expensive liquor and gifts for Mister Moncada, who loans his living quarters (unfortunately against his will, she knows now). They both get more than just hot sauce and for good reason. She honestly doesn’t want to start giving gifts to random privateers. It could be easily misconstrued. But then, denying this request would look rather petty. It’s just one bottle of sauce, isn’t it?
“Well, I can give you two bottles for your help and you can decide what to do with the second one.” Hinting to please not say it’s directly from her to him.
“Cool. I know he’ll appreciate it. Or I will when I make him cook something to put it on." Amusement is chased with a hardy laugh straight from the gut. Gansukh isn't blind to the benefit of having a friend in the kitchen. "So ah, think it's got some heat?" He wonders when the second bottle finds his hand.
"Oh, I'm afraid you will have to tell me, but I would assume so. Hopefully you don't offend the chef by covering his food in it."
"Eh." His unburdened hand dismissively waves away her worry. "Mays can make something that it works with. He's a damn good chef, nice guy too. But yeah, thanks again."
"No no, thank you for your help, Mister Batbayar. Hope you have a lovely day."
#badtrigger#long post.#v ( far cry 3 ) .#( answers ) .#npc ( gansukh batbayar ) .#(( bri is so awkward alone with these guys lol ;; ))
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Hello! Could you do the companions reacting to gender neutral! Sole who has pretty bad eye sight, and wears glasses asking them for help to find their glasses. Thanks! Have a great day!
(Oh my gosh! First request! I hope I did it justice!)
Cait
Is the queen of the are-you-kidding-me-face
Doesn’t complain, however
She’s probably the first to find their glasses, and hands them to their friend with the longest sigh.
Says something along the lines of “Don’t lose them again. I’m not helping you next time”
She will though.
She always will.
Curie
“Oh mon ami! Of course!”
She looks so concerned
She’s carefully scanning every area, trying to backtrack where Sole last was and when they were wearing them.
Sole will find them first, and she’ll be just as relieved as them.
Actually, I think she'll be more relieved than them.
Danse
Shit.
He immediately gets out of his power armor.
Shocker, I know.
But he remembers a scribe or two losing a pair of glasses while he was in power armor and one step and a crunch later, he was consoling a (basically) blind scribe
He is not making that mistake again.
He is literally five seconds away from getting a damn map and trying to locate where they were last.
He’s more stressed than Sole??
Cuz like, what if they can’t shoot right???
What if they step on a landmine???
Once Sole finds them, because they will, he gives a big sigh of relief and politely orders Sole to never lose them again
Deacon
Stinky, stinky bastard man
He will make Sole s t r e s s
You know those sour patch kid commercials where they say “first they’re sour… then they’re sweet?”
That’s Deacon.
He finds their glasses, no problem, and then proceeds to turn to Sole and say:
“Aw man, what happens if you don’t find them?”
When Sole undoubtedly goes spiraling because they’re stressed, he gives them the most shit eating grin as he slowly lifts their glasses into view.
Gage
He broke them.
Not on purpose.
He totally plays it off though
“No boss, I didn’t see them.”
He didn’t see them, not when he stepped on them with those god awful metal shoes.
If he didn’t break them, he can and will shrug and go “damn, that sucks” and continue doing what he was doing.
He does find it cute that Sole is running around like a radchicken with its head cut off.
Hancock
He’s wearing them.
Genuinely was curious how they would change his eyesight
Then his eyes eventually got used to them and he forgot he had them on.
He’ll look for it with Sole for an hour until someone says something.
If Sole didn’t notice however, he will proceed to laugh his ass off.
MacCready
“Oh my god, seriously???”
Groaning and complaining the entire time.
“You’re gonna slow us down!”
“Mac, we’re in Sanctuary.”
“So?”
“Ugh.”
Sole will find them first, but once they do, MacCready sees the relief on their face and feels a little guilty.
“I’m… I’m glad you found them.”
Nick Valentine
This man is 100% likely to say, and only say, “Where did you see them last”
Broski.
They checked. They checked every square inch of this damn house.
All the while they're complaining about how they've looked everywhere while he just stands up from the table and walking to the bed, reaches over the mattress and
He finds them.
They just materialize in his hand.
HOW.
HOW DID HE DO IT???
He will never answer, dear reader.
I think it’s a dad thing, though.
Old Longfellow
This man offers Sole his own glasses that he uses to pick the occasional lock and use terminals.
Yes, he has glasses.
He calls them his cheaters.
They won’t work as well for Sole, especially if they’re nearsighted, but it's the thought that counts.
He finds them first, and kind of pats them on the head when he finds them, telling Sole not to lose them again.
Piper
In the same boat Curie is in with the whole “oh my gosh! Yeah lets find them” and then “oh you found them? Thank god!”
She just isn’t as stressed as Curie
Off topic but she is the most likely to take them off and say “how many fingers am I holding up?”
Preston
Preston asks what places Sole checked, their bed, table, counter, their left pocket???
Going down the list of areas is actually kind of soothing, mainly because he’s so sympathetic to Sole.
Once he brings up a specific spot like the bathroom sink, Sole immediately remembers placing them down to do something.
And once Sole gets over and grabs them, he’s very pleased with himself.
Please say ‘thank you’ to him, he’ll give Sole the biggest smile ever.
X6-88
Finds it the fastest.
Like, Sole doesn't even say anything.
Not a full sentence at least.
“X6? Have you seen my-”
“Here you are Sir/Ma’am.” He whips them out of his pocket and just places them in their hands.
He will never elaborate on how he found them. But he just k n o w s
#fallout 4#cait fallout 4#danse#deacon#deacon fallout 4#fo4#preston garvey#fallout#fallout 4 companions#fallout 4 curie#john hancock#hancock#porter gage#fo4 gage#fo4 companions#preston#fo4 x6 88#x6 88#fo4 piper#piper wright#paladin danse#old longfellow#nick valentine#maccready#curie fallout 4#cait
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dante’s inferno
request: wassup homie could you maybe write a college au fic where levi and reader are rommies, then one day reader brings home an adopted cat without levi's prior knowledge? You could decide what happens next lol. Tysm 🥺
❈ pairing: levi ackerman x reader
❈ genre: fluff, semi-crack ❈ word count: 4k
❈ summary: college au. in which you bring a stray cat to your dorm and your neat freak roommate won’t let you keep it.
alternatively: a compilation of college shenanigans where you and levi are best friends who are bad with feelings (ft. an unamused cat named dante)
❈ trigger warnings: profanity. mentions of alcohol and smoking. implied smut.
a/n: this was supposed to be loosely based on the nine circles of hell according to inferno by dante alighieri— hence the title— but i did my research wrong so now it’s loosely based on the seven terraces of purgatory according to divine comedy. i’m keeping the title tho.
Inspired by this art by @ryuichirou on tumblr.
Permission to repost art was granted by the artist. Do not repost/edit the art without explicit permission from the artist.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
i. first terrace: pride
“We’re not keeping it.”
“But why?”
“We’re not keeping it.”
“But why.”
Levi’s tongue clicks in annoyance. His eyes glance next you where the offending creature lay on your bed; tail curling, paws kneading at his your favorite fleece blanket. Quite frankly he’s a little offended when the little shit has the audacity to glare at him back.
He’ll never admit it, but his ego’s a bit bruised because the cat’s glare was slightly better than his.
“I said no,” he firmly replies, looking back to you. “It’s bad enough I have to share a room with an anarchist who has no respect for boundaries—“
“One time, I forgot to use a coaster that one time!”
“—and now you expect me to share a room with a dirty fur ball who does nothing but eat, shit, and sleep?”
“He’s a cat, Levi.” You murmur, scooping the cat into your arms. “And he has a name,” you give a nervous smile when you see your rommate grit his teeth. He feels a headache coming.
“You named it?”
���Dante is not an ‘it’.”
Levi makes a move to step closer but immediately stops when the ‘Dante’ hisses at him.
“Aw, he likes you.” You coo.
“Clearly,” he replies unenthusiastically. “Listen,” he sighs. “I respect your cat’s pronouns but that doesn’t mean he’s allowed to stay. Or do I need to remind you of the mac and cheese incident?”
Okay, maybe he was on to something. If you got caught with a pet in the dorms you’d breach your third and final warning, and you’d be forced to dorm off-campus. The fact that you were still here after the mac and cheese incident was solely because Levi pulled some strings (aka asked Erwin, golden boy of the campus who owed him a favor, to pull some strings).
But you couldn’t just let Dante go. There was something about him that felt so familiar; something about his black fur, thin silver eyes, unamused snarl, and overall grumpy demeanor. Especially endearing was the way he’d grumble and pretend to be annoyed whenever you tried to cuddle him but would complain if you stopped.
You just couldn’t figure out who or what he reminded you of.
Maybe you would’ve figured it out too if you weren’t so distracted with watching Levi and Dante stare at each other. Your eyes dart back and forth between the grouchy cat sitting on your bed and your grouchy roommate sitting on his desk. Both were slightly crouched over with their heads tilted up in a show of dominance; they were engaged in what seemed to be a glaring contest, gunmetal irises unamused and mouths taut in a snarl as they protected their territory.
You sigh. You really, for the life of you, couldn’t figure out why Dante felt so familiar.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
ii. second terrace: envy
Levi is not jealous. He’s not.
At least that’s what he tells himself as he sulks alone on his bed. His arms are crossed and his lips are in a pout, eyebrows knitted in distaste, occasionally glancing to your side of the room where you sat up on your bed. He’s sure whatever movie you chose to watch together is interesting and all, but right now all he could pay attention to was that stupid cat. Sitting on your stupid lap. Getting its fur stroked by your stupid hand. Getting all the love and affection his stupid self should be receiving.
It was him you should be cuddling, not Dante. Saturday nights were reserved for him and you, not you and a cat while he happened to be in the room. He’s been trying to make a move on you since high school and he can’t fucking believe he’s losing your attention to a cat. Sure, he’s always been too chicken to make a move and had to suffer seeing you get together with assholes— as per your type during your emo high school days— but this was a new low. He can’t wrap his head around the concept that he’s losing his longterm crush to a motherfucking cat.
When you coo at how adorable the fleabag was for what felt like the 50th time that night, Levi decides he’s had enough of the cuddle-hogging piece of shit.
Wordlessly, he crosses to your side of the room and lifts the cat from its perch, ignoring your protests as he sets it down on the floor and tells it to ‘scram, you little fuck.’ He uses a hand to dust your lap free of any microscopic cat particles Dante probably left behind before lying down his head down once he was satisfied. He grabs your hand to put it on his hair.
“Stroke.” He orders, eyes closing.
“What? No! You pushed off Dante.”
“He was in my spot.”
“You couldn’t have given up your lap pillow for one night?”
“One night?” He scoffs and turns to look at you. “You’ve been abandoning me for two weeks. That disgusting, tic-infested, rabies-carrying slob has no business sitting on your lap.”
“He’s not disgusting, you gave him a shower before you agreed to let me keep him. And I took him the vet to make sure he had all his shots. He’s clean, Levi.”
“Tch, good. Now throw him out and let him find someone else to freeload from.”
“Okay, what’s going on?” You guffaw. “You’ve been grumpier than usual. And why’re you being such an ass to Dante? He’s just a cat.”
“Don’t think he’s special in some way. I’m an ass to everyone.”
“Then why does it feel like you’re always extra mean to him?”
He doesn’t reply. His lips are downturned into a frown when he looks away with a click of his tongue, and you realize with a sigh you won’t be getting an answer from your cryptic roommate soon. Your fingers start mindlessly stroking his undercut when you get lost in your thoughts— a habit you developed through years of Levi using your lap as a pillow. He always complained the first few times you did it but you knew it calmed both him and you, and that it put both your minds at ease. Moreso Levi right now, apparently.
You’re keenly aware of how he seems to curl up into you the more you keep going. You watch as his shoulders slump down when you stroke the side of his face, and his eyebrows relax slightly. From your angle, you could even see the way his eyes close in content. Maybe even a tiny smile if you were being delusional.
Your lip twitches upward.
“Oh my god, Levi, are you jealous of a cat?”
“Shut up and play with my hair.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
iii. third terrace: wrath
“You owe me a new cravat.”
You blink up at your roommate. “What?”
“You owe me a new cravat.” He repeats. He pulls from his pocket a white piece of fabric— barely recognizable— torn into shreds, releases it mid-air. It gently lands on your open palm.
“Wait, did Dante do this?” You ask, eyeing the slik in your hands.
“Unless you went feral in the middle of the fucking night and decided to cut up my clothes, yes.”
“Oh my god, Levi, I’m so sorry. I swear Dante will never—“
“You actually owe me three cravats,” he interjects. “The first two I overlooked since they weren’t that expensive but I draw the line here.” His lips are downturned into a frown, eyes poorly concealing his clear distaste. “This one’s my favorite and it was made from silk.”
You eye the fabric in your hands once more before nodding in understanding, setting down the once beautiful cravat before taking out your wallet. It was only fair that you paid him back; he was being more than generous with letting your cat stay and keeping it a secret, and now you wonder how many bad things Dante’s done that Levi’s overlooked or simply never brought up with you.
“Sure, I’m really sorry. How much do I owe you?”
Levi doesn’t say anything. Instead he pulls out his phone and types something on what you could only assume was google, most likely looking for the same brand of the cravat your cat had just torn into shreds. You weren’t entirely sure how much those could cost, but surely you could afford—
“What the fuck!” You screech, eyeing the page with very, very hefty price tags listed. Holy fucking hell where did he even get the money to buy something so expensive. Gulping, you nervously look up at your unimpressed roommate. You already knew he was taking it easy on you; his aura was the only thing intimidating, at least he wasn’t giving you the murder eyes. And even though he was a man of his word, you were thankful he hasn’t reported Dante.
Still, it didn’t change the fact that Levi looked pissed beyond belief.
“Uhm... can I pay you with a check that’ll definitely bounce?”
“You will pay me in cash.”
“Fuck, fine!”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
iv. fourth terrace: sloth
Levi silently works on his desk. His laptop’s open in fromt of him, numerous notes from classes and books from the library surrounding him. The gentle sounds of clicking and clacking echoe throughout the room as fingers typed at the keyboard, eyes concentrated and lips pulled taught as he focuses on his task. He’s on a roll. He’s almost done with this part of his research, nothing could snap him out of this, he just needs to—
“Levi, when do you think Dante will come back to me?”
He stops typing and grits his teeth.
This is how it’s been the entire night. Ten minutes of peace before you ask him some stupid questions that could’ve been answered with common sense.
“Fuck if I care.”
“Do you think it was something I did?”
He resumes typing. “Yes.”
“Do you think he’ll come back?”
“No.”
“Even after all we’ve been through?”
“Still no.”
“I miss him,” you sigh. “I miss him so much.”
“Then you shouldn’t have left the door open.”
It’s been a week since Dante escaped the dorm and Levi doesn’t understand why you’re still so depressed about it. I mean, you only lost a cat that you loved and treasured and treated like family. Surely a week of moping around in your pajamas and eating nothing but chips and soda was catharsis enough.
He hears you shift in your burrito blanket, presumably to turn away from him so you can sulk into the wall next to your bed. Good. Now he can get back to working on—
“Levi do you think Dante-“
“Enough.” He grits, slamming his laptop shut.
“Where’re you going?” You ask, eyeing the way he hurriedly stuffs papers and books into his bag along with his laptop.
“Out.” He replies, grabbing his keys and his coat. “I can’t stand this shit anymore.”
Your head is burried in your blankets when he slams the door shut and all you could do was slump down because great. You lost Dante, and now you’ve royally pissed off Levi.
Great. Just fucking great.
Unlike your cat, however, your roommate comes back hours later, just before curfew. He doesn’t bother with a hello— he never does— and neither do you, opting to stay hidden underneath the sheets. Though suddenly, there’s a dip in the mattress followed by a pur next to your head.
Could it be?
“Dante?” You murmur, lifting your head from underneath your cocoon of fabric. Small black paws and silver eyes meet your gaze. “Dante!” Immediately sitting up, you pulled him to your lap, scratching his little head and cooing about how much you missed him as he purred and curled into to you.
Levi would never say it, but he missed seeing you smile at the little fleabag.
You turn to look at your roommate. “How’d you find him?”
“Asked around the campus. He wandered into another dorm building and probably thought it was ours.”
“Well yeah but... I thought you hated him?”
“I do.” He replies instantly.
“Then why’d you find him?”
“I hate him, not you.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
v. fifth terrace: avarice
“I fucking hate both of you,” Levi grumbles, staring at the dorm.
Towers of boxes lined his supposed to be clean dorm room. He had a hard time prying the door open since it was blocked, and he wasn’t even sure how the boxes weren’t blocking out the light from how high they were piled. Dante’s sat on a stack of box directly next to the door, purring and flicking his tail around. Levi squints his eyes and glares at the little shit.
“You especially.”
“Mrow?”
Levi’s day had been, with no irony or sarcasm at all, amazing. He got a good grade on his research paper; the guy in front of him at the cafe accidentally ordered an extra serving of (coincidentally, Levi’s favorite) tea and gave it to him for free; and he got full marks for the presentation he’s been worrying about for weeks. His class even got dismissed early so he had an extra hour for lunch. He knew you didn’t have classes, so in honor of his great day he thought he’d do something nice and take you out for lunch. His treat, of course.
But any trace of his good mood vanished when he went back to the dorms and got greeted to a room that looked like it came from an episode of Hoarders.
This is what he gets for trying to be nice.
“Levi! Is that you?” You called out.
“What the fuck happened?”
You laugh sheepishly— at least Levi thinks you do. He couldn’t see you beyond the hundred boxes that took up your shared room. He hears some rustling and the sound of things being moved around before finally your head pops out from behind a wall of brown, smiling at him apologetically before walking towards him (and tripping a few times).
“Remember when I said I’d order some toys for Dante as a surprise?”
Levi’s eye twitches. “Don’t tell me—”
“I accidentally ordered 10,000 instead of 10. Online shopping struggles, am I right?” You nervously chuckle at his pissed off face. Levi was not in the mood.
Your smile widens as you make twinkly gestures with your hands. “So uh... surprise?”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
vi. sixth terrace: gluttony
The clinic is still when you first entered.
The harsh smell of alcohol and sterile metal makes your nose grimace, and the coldness of the thermostat brings goosebumps to your arms. Behind the wall, somewhete in the waiting room, cats are hissing, dogs are barking, and you could even hear the sound of birds angrily chirping and rattling their cages.
Dante cowers in fear on the silver table, and your heart aches. His ears are down and his fur’s standing on its ends, but you couldn’t comfort him. Not right now, at least. The veterinarian still needed to do a few more checks.
You gulp, “how’s... how’s Dante looking, doc?”
“Not good,” she murmurs. Her eyebrows are furrowed, and she takes a deep sigh as she eyes the information on the chart. “It’ll take months before he can walk properly again, possibly more if we don’t do anything about it soon.”
“Don’t tell me... is he—-”
“I’m sorry, my dear,” she sighs. “But your cat is heavily obese.”
The corners of your lips twitch down into a frown, and your palm is warm when you start to stroke Dante’s fur. He calms down a bit from your touch, less on edge but still guarded as he warily eyes the doctor’s gloved hands.
“But I don’t understand,” you reply. “I’ve been following the recommended diet you put him on, and I haven’t been feeding him anything other than the cat food and vitamins you recommended. How’s he still obese?”
“Well, we could look into other solutions, but for now I think we ought to look at whether or not Dante has an underlying health problem.”
Levi tunes out the chatter between you and the vet, bored eyes staring into nothing. He’s leaning against a wall and he’s watching the cat carrier. Your bag’s slung over his shoulders and your coat’s in his arms, and he was sure you didn’t even need him to be here for “moral support.”
He mentally scoffs. You probably just needed a chauffeur to drive you for free, and honestly, Levi would rather feel like a chauffeur than a coat rack.
His eyes make contact with Dante’s, and all the fear in the cat’s eyes is suddenly gone, replaced with a steely glare and bared teeth. A warning, one no one else notices but him.
Levi gives him a solitary nod, understanding what Dante wanted to say.
Don’t tell Y/N I’ve been sneaking to the neighbors.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
vii. seventh terrace: desire
There’s something about the buzz of alcohol and nicotine that makes Levi confident—- the liquid courage in his veins and the smoke in his lungs clouding his judgement. Perhaps that’s where he finally gets the balls to cross the room, drunken eyes on your equally intoxicated ones, before he pulls you in for a kiss.
The kiss starts slow, with lips just interlocking and lightly testing the waters. But then he feels your tongue make its way inside his mouth and your fingers weave into his hair to tug him closer, and Levi loses the last threads of inhibition he has. His tongue massages yours and one of his arm wraps around your waist, the other comes down to grope and knead your ass. He feels you walk backwards and your hand pulls at his tie, dragging him with you. Suddenly he’s trapping you against a wall, lifting one of your legs up to wrap around his hips so he could grind his crotch into yours.
Levi doesn’t expect his first kiss with you to be like this; messy and full of tongue and spit, full of fingers clawing at clothes and small grunts escaping your lips. He was hoping it’d be more romantic, with warm cheeks and fingers softly intertwining, shy kisses exchanged through little smiles.
But he’s not about to complain—- he’s wanted to be with you for years, and god he loved having you like this. Loved having you all hot and desperate, trapped between his firm chest and the wall. His cock is hard in his pants, and he just about growls when he feels you start to undo his belt, the fly of his pants coming down as you got on your knees and stared up at him with innocent eyes as you pull out his aching boner. There’s a cheeky grin your face when you pump at his length, and your tongue peaks out of your mouth before—
“Levi, are you okay?”
His eyes snap open, and he’s greeted to the sight of your worried face directly above his.
“Fuck!” he yells, and his forehead slams into yours when he flinches away. “Sorry, sorry” he quickly ammends when you yelp in pain.
He’s covered in sweat, he notices. Chest heaving, heart beating a little too loud for his liking, and he silently pulls the blankets over his cum stained boxers when you sit beside him.
God, he was really hoping you wouldn’t notice the fact that he came in his pants like a high schooler. And it was before dream you even got to suck him off. How much more pathetic could he be.
“Are you okay?” He asks, and you nod.
“Yeah, m’fine, it’s just...” your eyes are distracted, staring off into space. Fingers trace his thighs, and you sigh. “You were having a nightmare,”
Levi blinks. “What?”
“You were having a nightmare,” you repeat. “Kept tossing and turning and groaning in your sleep. And you kept making these... funny faces,”
“...right,” he nods. Sure, a nightmare. A nightmare he never wanted to wake up from.
It takes about ten minutes to reassure you that yes, he was fine, don’t mind the way his cheeks are flushed, he was just... shaken up from his nightmare, is all. Then you’re back to bed, sleeping the night away, and twenty minutes later he’s on his way back to bed too; this time with a fresh pair of boxers and a content look on his face, all thanks to him finishing off his fantasies in the communal bathroom during his shower.
The door makes a quiet click when he shuts it behind him, and he freezes when he catches sight of Dante sat up on your bed, tail flicking behind him as he gives Levi a knowing look.
Levi squints his eyes, and he threateningly whispers, “you tell no one.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
epilogue
The half empty room brings a frown to your face, and all you could do was pout as you sealed up the last of the boxes.
“Why do you have to leave again?” you ask, and Levi turns around as he finishes folding the last of his clothes. He shrugs. “Cats aren’t allowed in the dorms.”
You owed him your entire college career, that much was sure. The RA’s found out about Dante, and Levi had taken the fall to spare you. He wasn’t required to move out since it was only his first strike, but he insisted on doing so so that Dante wouldn’t be alone, saying he already found an apartment nearby and he’ll never hear the end of it from you if he didn’t take Dante with him.
Bullshit. Levi had a soft spot for Dante, you knew that much. He wasn’t doing it for you, he was doing it for himself. Though normally you’d be overjoyed to know that Levi really did secretly like the cat he pretended to hate so much, this time, you were just pissed. You couldn’t believe a fucking cat was stealing away the guy you’ve been in love with since high school. Sure, you were too much of a coward to ask him out, but he was basically your boyfriend already—- the entire campus knew you inadvertently had dibs on each other.
“Yeah but... do you have to leave me alone?”
“I asked you to come with me, and you said no.” He points out. “I still don’t see why when we’ve been roommates since we were freshmen.”
“It’s different off-campus!”
“How?”
“Because it’s like... it’s like we’re moving in together, y’know?” you reply. “And it seemed wrong to move in with you when we’re not even dating.”
“Let’s do it, then.”
“What do you mean?”
He sighs, handing you a spare key to what you could only assume was his new apartment. You glance between him and the key in your hands, and he rolls his eyes when he realizes that you still don’t get it.
“I know we’re doing this backwards since couples don’t typically move in before the first date,” he says before gesturing to Dante. “But we already have a son, and I know you’re his favorite parent. We can share custody until you can move in with me.”
You blink. “What?” Your brain stopped working when Levi referred to you as a couple, and you’re pretty sure your heart stopped beating too. At this point, anything he said went in one ear and out the other. He flicks your forehead.
“Hey— ow! What was that for?”
“You weren’t listening.”
“And you’re being a prick!” you grumble. “It hurts, y’know.”
He scoffs. “What do you want me to do? Kiss it better?” he scoffs.
Your mouth moves faster than your brain, “I’d rather you kiss me.”
Wait. What?
Before you could go back on your words, Levi shrugs. Warm palms gently grab your cheeks, pulling your face closer to his. Your eyes widen and you momentarily freeze, brain definitely not working anymore. He hesitates when you don’t make a move, but then you’re shyly leaning forward, and that was all the confirmation Levi needs.
“If you insist,” he whispers, and suddenly your words die on your tongue when his lips interlock with yours.
alrightberries © 2020. do not modify or repost.
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#levi ackerman x reader#levi x reader#levi ackerman imagine#levi imagine#attack on titan x reader#aot x reader#attack on titan imagine#aot imagine#shingeki no kyojin x reader#snk x reader#shingeki no kyojin imagine#snk imagine#writing
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lets be friends lol
heyyy, my name is monse but you can call me Mo. i’m an 18 y/o mexican american w ADHD, i think that sums me up ok.
i’ve posted something like this two years in a row so let’s just make it a tradition :)
i’m about to graduate highschool and i’m honestly scared. my first post to try and make friend was about liking one direction, harry styles, and some other stuff i’ve forgotten, last years post was about me liking Minecraft youtubers and all that, but it’s safe to say those are no longer my main hyperfixations. i’m always down to talk about the minecraft community (the good and bad),the toxicity of the internet in general, and to discuss important topics overall, though, my current obsession is now percy jackson again.
To all of the seniors going through tough times right now and are feeling lost,scared, and not ready, i feel you. if you need someone to hear you out just hit me up. really, as dumb as you think you sound or feel, feelings are feelings. dealing with mental illness and other unhealthy habits at this point makes me feel a little bit helpless and scared to move on from high school, but i have to remind myself that i am not alone in this, that other people understand this feeling too. so im here for you, and proud of all of us who have tried our best to make it to graduation.
but anyways,,, let me tell you about me and my relationship with PJO
i loved percy jackson when i was in middle school and it was my whole childhood. i never finished the heroes of olympus series because i think i was scared to have it all come to an end. Now that i’m a senior about to graduate i’ve decided to reread the books and finally finish the series, and i need people to talk to about the books :D i think finishing this series is the closure that i need, but i feel like many people (especially seniors) are going through tough spots right now and if you need someone to talk to and if you are willing to hear me rant about percy jackson once in a while don’t be shy to hit me up! just a “hey” to start a convo and it can lead somewhere
and of course pery jackson isnt the only thing ive been liking recently,if you want to talk music im always open to reccomendations! currently ive been back into tyler the creator but i think he might just be my all-time fav, rex orange county being a close second though, ive also been listening to panic at the disco again lmfao mostly the first two albums tho because they are the best (i don't accept criticism on this), and i guess ive been listeing to some mac miller, will wood, glass animals, harry styles, declan mckenna, and a bit of carseatheadrest loll.
i like minecraft, geoguessr and tbh i love playing fortnite because i suck and its really funny to do dumb shit so im down to game if you want. (i also have stardew and terraria if anyone would like to play with me). if you can teach me or want to learn how to play chess with me that would be sick tooi also quite enjoy crafting, i occasionally like to crochet, make friendship bracelets,make silly little clay things,draw, and paint.
I dont watch many shows or movies but i am really fucking excited for the new season of the umbrella academy to come out and for the new doctor strange movie as well, like SO excited. and ofc the PJO series that is in the works AHHH. my current fave youtubers are the sturniolo triplets and the only podcast i watch/listen to is the chuckle sandwich podcast but i do love emergency intercom as well.
so yeah, hmu if you wanna chat about anything and everything, all of the time ;) (also i forgot to mention that im gay but if you are homophobic please leave)
April 14, 2022
#friends#internet friends#online friends#pjo fandom#PJO#percy jackson#heroes of olympus#the umbrella academy#mcyt#mcytumblr#bo burnhan#crocheting#high shool#high school senior#senioritis#graduating#harry styles#umbrella academy#marvel#book recs pls#music recs please#music recommendation#lets chat#percy jackon and the olympians#percabeth
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Snippets Ch.4 : Johnny and Josuke (4) with the Same Crush (3)
Previous Chapter
A set of multiple drabbles/oneshots combining characters (i.e Jojos) from multiple parts and AUs.
.::.
"That guy...do you think--" Josuke started.
"That's their boyfriend? No idea." Johnny quickly answered, trying to play it off as if he didn't care.
It was quite the opposite. He may have cared too much.
To say Johnny was jealous was an understatement. But it seemed like Josuke was feeling some of the heat too, seeing you hanging out with some guy and proceeding to talk about him with Josuke when the two of you went to lunch the other day.
Josuke was still in the dark about Johnny’s own crush on you, which was a relief for the jockey, but it was hell for him, having to be afraid of either guy winning you over first.
He just needed to muster up the courage to talk to you again, but it was a lot more difficult than he thought it’d be. You two always seemed to be busy when the other wasn’t. Of course he still had Gyro (and occasionally Josuke and Hot Pants) to keep him company, but he missed you.
The little spat the cousins had was forgotten for a while. They didn’t exactly apologize to each other, but just starting to talk normally again was enough sign there was no hard feelings. The younger teen was still very confused about Johnny’s intentions that day.
‘ Was he trying to be a good role model or was he just mad I was leaving him at home?’ he thought. It didn’t really matter to him anymore, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t concerned about what Johnny must’ve been thinking, and if he still did feel that way.
They sat at a small table on the far side of the kitchen. Josuke, looking rather bored, held his head on his palm, while Johnny was playing on their shared Switch. Or at least, was pretending to be after Josuke brought up the subject.
“Hey, can I ask you an honest question?” The Japanese teen breaks the icy silence once again.
Johnny merely raises an eyebrow with a low ‘hm’ that was barely audible. His heart silently raced thinking of what the boy sitting across from him had on his mind to ask.
“(y/n)...how long have you known them?”
A simple enough question to start off with, Josuke thought. Yet Johnny’s lips still pursed.
“Uh...about half a year now. We got really close in that time I’d say.” That last part wasn’t even to get a rise out of Josuke, he just genuinely thought so. He really cared about you, romantically or not.
Meanwhile, Josuke had only known you for the duration of the summer, which was about to end in a couple of weeks. Perhaps if he’d beg Johnny to let him stay he’d have more time to bond with you, but there was also the issue of him feeling homesick from time to time.
God, if he could take you back to Morioh with him..it’d be like a dream come true.
They both had quickly forgotten about whatever guy Josuke was referring to earlier, mixed up in their own thoughts about their relationship with you. Besides, he had only ever seen the guy once, there was no way you’d switch up on him that quickly.
He had no dates or anything planned with you like he usually does, though. Not that he didn’t want to spend time with you, he just felt as if he was coming off as a little...clingy.
Higashikata had been trying to drop hints that he liked you, such as buying you things, having heart-to-heart conversations as he’d walk you home, calling you pet names, and ending his goodnight texts with a little heart emoji. He considered himself a romantic, but when it came to your reactions, you kinda brushed them off platonically. Perhaps you’d never been flirted with before?
His texts were still frequent, making sure you were having a good day and all, but he figured maybe he should start being a little more risky..
“What do you like about (y/n) anyways?” Johnny asked.
There was a pause for a couple of seconds, before Josuke scooted back in his chair and got up from the table, intending to retreat to his room for a couple of hours.
“The same things you do, probably.”
.::.
“Ow! Gyro, what the hell was that for?!”
“Because, idiota, you need to confess already.” He hovers over Johnny like a judgmental parent.
Josuke had left the house to get some groceries, and in that time, the jockey called Gyro over. Not for advice specifically, but that's what it had eventually turned into. Sitting on the floor of Johnny’s room (where it was painfully easy to find porn magazines, Gyro won’t let that go as long as the two of them live).
“Like seriously, this is getting embarrassing to watch, just do it already.” The Italian pointed a finger at his friend. “Sooner or later you’re gonna do the thing where you get the girl drunk and then sleep with her regardless of feelings.”
“Ugh, I’m not like that anymore Gyro!” Johnny folds his arms with a pout his friend knows all too well at this point. “I’ve never committed to anyone before, so of course this is a little more awkward for me than it is for anyone else, you know this!”
Indeed he did know. It was somehow one of the things they always ended up talking about.
“Listen, I know how this is gonna end. Its gonna end with you in this same room, bunched up in several blankets, listening to Fleetwood Mac on repeat with 3 pizza boxes to make yourself feel better.”
The American scoffs.
Gyro sits upright on his bed. “I’m right. Look, this gal means a lot to you, I know. I’ve seen it. You’ve never stared at someone with such a…not hateful look in your eye.” It was half a joke, half truth. “And I don't wanna see you sad, so you’re just gonna have to pull yourself up, grow some steel balls, and ask them out. For real. For both of our sakes at this point.”
Johnny rolls his eyes. “Wow, Gyro wants me to be with a girl? Pigs must be flying.”
“You are so not funny.” The Italian’s teeth flashes for a moment as he scowls.
“Alright, since you’re such a casanova, why don’t you tell me what to say to them?” At this rate, there was really no other choice for Joestar to take. He could ask Hot Pants, but knew she would give him similar advice.
“Nyo-ho! I’ll show ya! All you gotta do is gimme your phone.”
As soon as the word ‘gimme’ was uttered, the jockey clutched his phone as if it was a baby. The last few times he lended his friend his phone, it didn’t go so well.
Gyro would’ve snorted if he wasn’t serious about this.
“Come onnn! It--”
“Won’t go like the last three times, right? Fat chance.”
“Just hurry and hand it over before I tackle you!”
The larger man did that far too much already, much to Johnny’s dismay. Once Gyro had him in a headlock, there was no getting out of it. He defeatedly raised his phone up to the man for him to take.
“If you ruin anything, I’m doing the same thing to you, AND taking your damn horse.” The Italian waved him off as if he was merely an angry toddler. As he typed, Johnny tried to peer over and see, but his friend was too adamant on turning side to side so he couldn’t. The expressions Gyro was making wasn’t a good sign either. First confused, then mischievous, then looking a little too proud of himself. The jockey’s hands could start sweating at any moment from the sheer anxiety this was giving him.
“Aaaaaand done! There we go, all set!”
Johnny reached for his phone as soon as the words left his mouth, unapologetically in a snatching manner to immediately read the text sent.
::‘Hey This is Johnny darling. Hope your day has been as beautiful as your smile. I was wondering if you’re free tomorrow by 12pm. I have something very important to tell you. See you soon xoxo.’::
Alright, so it wasn’t as bad as he thought itd be (not nearly as bad as the time Gyro dared him to send a ‘send nudes’ text to you) but god, it would look suspiciously out of character for you to see. He can’t even remember the last time he typed ‘darling’ instead of ‘darlin’ and actually bothered to punctuate his texts. And who even used ‘xoxo’ anymore?
His friend looked at him with a big grin, waiting for his reaction. A slightly more pure smile than if he were waiting for Johnny to get a joke.
“Soooo what do you think? You gotta pick some nice clothes out for your date.”
The shorter man sighs.
“Its...passable.”
.::.
Josuke got home a little later than he expected. He was surprised to see there was still Prince CDs in stock at the store. Thats one of the perks of coming to America, he guessed. He was more than ready to put them into one of Johnny’s old CD players he had found. It was already hard for him to listen to pretty much anything without thinking of you. At least if it was Prince specifically, it would help him feel better and he could jam out to it.
Finally finding the track he wanted, he grinned, letting the music play out loud and hopping on his bed. It was a good few minutes before he had started getting that feeling in his gut again.
..Crap, this wasn’t helping either.
The teen felt that he couldn’t endure this much longer. Love was something he took very seriously and to be so unsure about your relationship just made him feel funny. He had to at least know for sure if the both of you were on the same page. Josuke was sick of being so anxious about it.
Josuke laid down flat on his back, pulling his phone out.
“You know what? I’m gonna ask them out.”
#jojo#jjba#jjba x reader#Josuke Higashikata#josuke x reader#josuke higashikata x reader#Johnny Joestar#johnny joestar x reader#jojo x reader
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For the Last Time- Nerve Agents are NOT the Only Chemical Weapons: a “Golden Lancehead, Etc...” Science Review
So this one is probably going to be shorter than other ones I’ve done for this show, but having conveniently just refreshed my hospital decon team certification, taken a cumulative exam in EHS, and watched this episode (I’m a tad behind), I needed to do some talking on it.
Awl - X-Ray + Penny - Duct Tape + Jack - CD + Hoagie Foil - Guts + Fuel + Hope - Wilderness + Training + Survival - Father + Bride + Betrayal - Lidar + Rogues + Duty - Nightmares - Seeds + Permafrost + Feather - Friends + Enemies + Border - Mason + Cable + Choices - Bitter Harvest - Kid + Plane + Cable + Truck - Tesla + Bell + Edison + Mac -
To recap, after Oversight’s death from cancer (season 5 has an absolutely wild timeline so far), Mac seeks out the help of former classmate Frankie to help him develop a new treatment modality based on the venom of a very rare, critically endangered lancehead viper. The venom is extremely dangerous, and can also, it turns out, be chemically altered to become a very potent nerve agent. Frankie unknowingly provides the information to create the nerve agent to the episode’s bad guy, and the race is on to stop the agent from being released into an airport and poisoning a bunch of people.
Intro to the Golden Lancehead
Since the episode centers around the Golden Lancehead Viper, we should probably start by talking about what they are:
Bozer described the Golden Lancehead as “One of the rarest and deadliest snakes in the world. Found only on one island off the coast of Sao Paulo, the Brazilian Government has made it illegal to transport or own.” Then, quoting a nature documentary: “The golden lancehead’s venom targets the nervous system of it’s prey with pinpoint accuracy- causing blood blisters, intestinal bleeding, tissue necrosis, hemmorrhage...”
Golden Lanceheads are a real type of snake that really do only live on a tiny island off the coast of Sao Paulo, Brazil. They are 28-inch-long, cream and yellow snakes with a lance-shaped head and a diamond-like pattern of scales.
The island, called Queimada Grande, is uninhabited and travel there is forbidden, an order enforced by the Brazilian Navy. This is both to protect the viper, which is listed as critically endangered, and to protect the humans- given the remoteness of the island and the danger posed by the wildlife, it would be very dangerous for rescuers to come find you if you became injured or were bitten by any of the multiple venomous creatures that live there.
In the episode, Mac and Frankie travel to a pet shop in Sao Paulo to collect a sample of the venom from an illegally acquired snake. In real life, there is a lucrative black market for the species, which can fetch up to $30,000 per snake, meaning Mac paying $20,000 for a sample of venom would not have been necessarily unheard-of.
The pet shop owner tells them that the person who ventured to the island died from a bite, describing it as (paraphrased) “his face swelled, blood poured from everywhere, and even though they cut off his arm to try to save him at the hospital, he died anyway.”
Due in all likelihood to the fact that the island is uninhabited and forbidden, there has never actually been an official documented bite in a human from this species (though unofficial reports suggest it can indeed be deadly). Chemical analysis of the venom indicates it is likely the most potent and fastest-acting venom of it’s genus, though it is likely a lot more effective at killing birds and large insects than mammals given its primary choice of prey.
Bites from other vipers in its genus run a mortality rate of between 3% (with medical care) and 7% (without medical care). Most of their venoms are made of many different sugar-like molecules called glycans which disrupt proteins in animal cells, often killing the cells. Lancehead venom is similarly cytotoxic, causing the death of cells in tissue and blood and disruption of normal blood clotting, causing severe bleeding. Symptoms include pain and extreme swelling of the area around the bite, followed by tissue death and symptoms of nausea, dizziness, headache, and sweating. Shortly after that, there is a disruption in blood clotting, causing severe bleeding throughout the body. This severe bleeding, along with kidney failure and bleeding into the brain, is typically what causes death in those 3-7% of cases. Occasionally amputation is attempted as part of treatment, but it is usually due to the extreme amount of tissue death that occurs surrounding the bite, not necessarily to stop the spread of the venom as alleged in the episode.
So basically, Bozer and his nature documentary are largely correct in where the Golden Lancehead lives, its legal restrictions, and the symptoms resulting from envenomation by lancehead vipers. The only thing that is not accurate is the neurotoxicity part- lancehead venom is hemotoxic (blood toxic) and cytotoxic (toxic to cells and tissues), but there is no indication that it causes any kind of neurotoxicity (brain toxic).
Cancer Treatment from Snake Venoms
In the episode, Mac describes the research he and Frankie are undertaking as “The therapy uses toxins extracted from snake venom, which billions of years of evolution have taught it to attack the weakest cells in a creature’s body to target cancerous tumors.”
One of the great things about snake venoms (and honestly animal venoms) is that they are not single toxins. A single snake’s venom has nearly a hundred different bioactive proteins, enzymes, glycans, and other chemicals. One of the great things is because so many of these toxins are bioactive in some way, venoms give pharmacologists a pallette of various bioactive substances already in existence that they can test and use to create drugs.
Several chemicals we use as drugs were originally discovered in snake venom. For example, enalapril (a blood pressure lowering medicine), eptifibatide (a blood thinner), hemocoagulase (a clotting agent), and ximelagatran (a blood thinner), were all discovered originally as components in snake venom. Some studies into king cobra and saw scaled viper venom has shown possible anti-cancer properties (in the form of drugs that prevent tumors from growing, prevent blood vessels from growing in cancer cells, and prevent cancer cells from spreading throughout the body), though none of these have been developed into therapeutic drugs.
Since there are literally hundreds of bioactive chemicals, enzymes, and proteins in snake venom, it’s definitely not impossible that someone could choose to do this research, and definitely not impossible that someone would be able to find something useful in treating cancer or any other disease. In fact, since the venom is so cytotoxic, there is a possibility that there is a compound in it that has a preference for certain cancer cells. The problems with what Mac says are mainly:
1. that as far as we know, nothing in venom would selectively choose cancer cells based on their “weakness”- generally drugs that do target cancer cells target the fact that they have mutated in a certain way that lets certain chemicals find them or that they are fast-dividing cells (similar to hair or skin cells) and fast-disrupted cells get killed first if a chemical disrupts cell division.
2. Snakes have only been around for 143million years, and venomous creatures have only been around for 170million years. Even one billion years is a LOT longer than that. Mac could have said hundreds of millions and it would still have been technically correct at least grammatically.
Chemical Weapons from Snake Venom:
So what about chemical weapons?
I mean, sure, if you consider that there are hundreds of chemicals in any snake venom, at least one of them is probably going to meet at least some of the criteria for a good chemical weapon. Whether or not that chemical weapon would count as a “Nerve Agent” is kind of up to the substance itself.
Chemical weapons are weapons that fall into one of the following categories:
Nerve Agents- these are things like VX, Sarin, Tabun, and other agents that attack the system that breaks down the neurotransmitter acetylcholine. Without that system, too much acetylcholine builds up, causing constricted pupils, twitching, excessive saliva and mucous, eye pain, diarrhea, difficulty breathing, seizures, and death if not treated promptly.
Blood Agents- these are things like phosgene, arsine, and cyanide that disrupt the blood’s ability to transport oxygen through the body. These cause symptoms like difficulty breathing, dizziness, headache, increased heart rate and respiratory rate, nausea and vomiting, and eventually seizures and death.
Blister Agents- These are things like lewisite and mustard gas that cause severe irritation to skin, eyes, mucous membranes, and lungs. These cause symptoms of pain, redness and large blisters on skin, difficulty breathing and swelling/blisters in the lungs and airway, loss of vision, fever, and nausea/vomiting. Death either occurs due to swelling and blisters in the airway or infection.
Choking Agents- These are things like phosgene and chlorine that irritate eyes and airways. They cause symptoms of watering eyes, coughing, chest tightness, and nausea/vomiting. They eventually cause severe pulmonary edema which can cause death.
Incapacitating Agents- These are agents like LSD, BZ, and fentanyl which are not necessarily designed to kill their targets, but leave them unable to respond to an attack either by making them less conscious (BZ, fentanyl) or by causing severe hallucinations and delusions that prevent them from being able to carry out their normal duties (BZ, LSD).
While there are many neurotoxic snake venoms that are known to have chemicals that interact with acetylcholine (causing paralysis, respiratory failure, and seizures), as far as I was able to find, the lancehead viper genus is not one of them. In fact, despite what Bozer said, there’s not a lot of neurotoxicity at all in the Golden Lancehead Viper’s venom- it’s primarily hemotoxic and cytotoxic.
So, basically, while it might be possible to make a nerve agent out of certain types of venom (though why would you, exactly? We’ve got tons of nerve agents, we know a lot about them, and they’re not exactly hard to create in a lab.) it would be more likely that you’d be in the market to find a new blood agent, blister agent, or even a choking or incapacitating agent if you were using Golden Lancehead Viper venom to discover it.
Just seems like a lot of work when you could get potentially a lot more useful venom legally and less dangerously.
But the more I think about it, I think the writers chose the snake due to it’s difficulty to acquire and it’s mystery, the chemical agent due to it’s well-known-ness, and fudged things so they worked together in the story.
But Now, the Real Question:
Could snake venoms eat through metal using acid, and would ionizing radiation change that?
“Here’s another fun fact- when a Golden Lancehead attacks, it’s venom reacts with the iron in the red blood cells of it’s prey, creating an acidic byproduct strong enough to eat flesh and corrode metal.” -Mac
Certain snake venoms actually do become more acidic or more alkaline in their victim’s bodies, and in the presence of certain metal ions. However, as far as I was able to tell, the most acidic a venom would normally become was about a pH of 4 (somewhere between soda and coffee) and the most alkaline was about 9 (somewhere around baking soda). So not really capable of “eating flesh” (though enzymatic activity could digest proteins in the victims’ tissues) and it would take a lot longer than the episode showed to cause the corrosion necessary to dissolve a lock.
That’s not to say that a specially designed and purified chemical weapon created from a compound in snake venom would be different than the og snake venom, but the likelihood that ionizing radiation would change it so drastically would be a real bummer for a terrorist, since uncontrolled releases of your weapons are definitely not ideal.
Conclusion:
Overall, there was definitely some real passable science in here, but some of the dialogue choices were so poor that it made it difficult to respect. But generally decent science, even if the “cooler” stuff wouldn’t necessarily have worked.
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Danganronpa V3 Smash Bros Tournament!
•Monokuma decides a good way to get everyone to kill each other is a Smash Bros Tournament, I mean, with all the salt someone’s bound to snap.
•No one kills each other, aside from Maki attempting to kill Kokichi, but it does become a weekly tradition despite the rage.
Kaede Akamatsu
• Get’s into a heated debate over who gets to main Rosalina with Kaito, but after a bit she caved and agreed to pick someone else.
•She end’s up picking Peach after Tsumugi makes a comment that they kinda look alike.
•Little did anyone know that Kaede is actually kinda a monster with Peach and frequently does really well in the tournaments.
•Favourite stage is New Donk city, and every time she gets to play on it she sings Jump up Superstar the entire match.
•Nobody is sure if they love or hate it.
•When not singing, she’ll make the stage music anything that has a dominant Piano.
•Favourite item is the Star Rod
Shuichi Saihara
• Acts like he’s never played before and decides to main Chrom due to him seeing easy enough to play and liking his personality.
•In actuality has played on and off for years and is a proud Dedede main but is too embarrassed to admit it.
•Also plays Pikachu but cause it’s Miu’s main he doesn’t usually use the electric mouse.
•Usually middle of the road in the tournaments.
•Prefers to fight on Battlefield but so long as the stage doesn’t move he can live with anything.
•Likes to keep items off.
Rantaro Amami:
•Good with all three Link forms, but has a bias for Toon Link.
•Can’t remember when he started playing, but given how he’s the only one who doesn’t panic by tripping they assume it’s Brawl.
•They also assume this because whenever someone picks Meta Knight he gets visibly distressed.
•Tournament wise he Can either do really well or really s**t depending on the day.
•Doesn’t have a favourite stage but tends to pick the Zelda stages cause he likes them the best.
•The only one who’s happy when a warp star shows up.
Ryoma Hoshi:
•At first played Incineroar cause its the only cat.
•After realising how bad his recovery was though, he kinda just tried anything to see what would work.
•Found a few semi-mains, namely Snake, Link and Villager
•Usually doesn‘t try to hard in tournaments so comes in last, or will even sit out, but when he wants to win, he will.
•Moral of the story, if he picks Villager, panic.
•No stage or item preference, but when it’s his turn to pick he tends to go with Shadow Moses island cause he likes the look.
Kirumi Tojo
•Mains everyone and is good with all of them.
•Like, can beat Mario with Little Mac good.
•Does have a slight preference towards Shiek though due to her admiring the ninja’s loyalty.
•Due to her skills, she tends to sit out with Ryoma to give everyone a chance.
•When she does play though, well, try not to loose too fast.
•Also usually the one who has to stop Maki killing Kokichi if he beats her.
•Always goes random when stage picking time comes, but also puts all the stages in battlefield mode in case it lands on something BS.
•For similar reasons tries to ignore items
Angie Yonaga
•Everyone expected her to pick Palutena, and while she does have her as a sub main, Angie usually plays Sephiroth. •Why? Angel (kinda), kick ass theme, and loves watching the others panic when they see him. Plus, Atua told her to pick someone unexpected.
•Also tried Pit and Dark Pit, and while she likes their personalities she isn’t big on their gameplay.
•To this day the only one who’s beat Kirumi in a match, and outside of that time she’s still good in tournaments.
•Atua told Angie to pick Big Blue one day, and ever since everyone dreads her turn on stage select.
Tenko Chabishira
• Always plays as a girl no matter what.
•Plays Min Min more often than not, but occasionally surprises everyone by whipping out villager.
•Why? “She’s Himiko cute!!”
•Pretty good at the game, but super competitive. Unless you’re Himiko, be prepared to get yelled at at least once if she looses.
•One day while everyone was playing random, she got Ken and kinda hated that she likes it so she occasionally plays him in private. •Shuichi caught her doing this while he was playing Dedede, and they both promised to never tell a soul.
•Punch Out stage or bust!
•Doesn’t have an opinion on items, but when she plays villager she hopes for the bunny hood cause she thinks it’s adorable.
Korekiyo Shinguji
•Lucario or bust (he likes the aura theme) though he’s also kinda a monster with Lucina
•Strangely though, whenever he uses Lucina he acts... different? (the class is convinced he’s possessed when this happens.)
•Outside of that though, tends to be one of the worse players.
•Second to none at recovery though.
•Hyrule castle has been his favourite stage since day one And that’s never gonna change.
•Always has items on, he likes the surprise factor (he and Shuichi are never allowed have a one on one fight)
Miu Iruma
•Has probably been playing the longest aside from Kirumi.
•Has played all the games, and cause Of this is decent with all of the OG 8, but will always pick Pikachu.
•Will only ever pick someone else if it’s a random match or someone makes her give Shuichi a turn, and in that case she picks Pichu as a backup.
•Despite her boasting, is usually in the lower end of the group.
•Doesn’t stop her from rubbing it in when she wins though.
•Tends to go for Wily’s castle for her stage, if for no other reason than she’s the only one who can handle the yellow devil.
•Super Hammer or bust!
Gonta Gokuhara
•Likes Donkey Kong the best, but also tries to learn how to play Joker from Kokichi cause he looks like a gentleman.
•Also likes all the Pokémon even if he isn’t the best with them.
•Honestly, aside from Olimar he likes everyone, and he only really dislikes Olimar cause he’s bullying the bugs!
•Everyone agrees to never touch the pikmin rep when he’s in the room.
•Tends to come in last with the only one he can beat kinda consistently is Ryoma without villager, but he still has a lot of fun.
•Tends to pick whatever stage everyone likes best, and has no clue how to use items.
Kokichi Ouma
•Always plays Joker because who else is a phantom thief going to pick.
•Actually he plays Villager in his spare time but Kaito is the only that knows and that was a mistake so shh.....
•Begrudgingly teaches Gonta how to play, if only from the horror on someone’s face when they get cocky only to loose to the guy who didn’t even know what a Smash Bros was a few weeks ago.
•Peak troll. Camps with gun, let’s people *cough* Kaito and Miu *cough* Hit fake smash balls, always picks the auto scrolling stages, he just loves making everyone groan.
•Only thing that makes him visibly salty is Miu on stage select cause f**k yellow devil.
Kaito Momota
•A proud Rosalina main. A badass space princess that protects the stars, what’s not to love?
•First time they all play, they all expect him to suck..... so you can imagine their surprise he‘a one of the best players in the class, especially at edge guard
•Despite that, is the most susceptible to stage hazards and bad items, especially fake smash balls. He has gotten better at recovering from them though.
•Never asks anyone to turn them off though, cause it’s worth it for the black hole and the assist trophies.
•Whenever Kiyo plays Lucina, he makes sure to sit at the other end of the couch.
•Always tries to give people pointers, though since he really only plays one character he’s not the best at it.
•Will ALWAYS pick either the Mario Galaxy stage or the Star Fox stages
Tsumugi Shirogane
•Tends to pick Kirby for A, the cute hats, and B, it gives her an excuse to rant about the lore. You know those Kirby fans who obnoxiously push how the series is super deep? That’s Tsumugi.
•Rants the whole match, leading to people preferring Kokichi obnoxiously joining in on Kaede’s singing to it. •Knowing they’re not safe when she’s not playing either, they all agree that unless it’s random’s to never pick a Kirby stage or character (another reason for Shuichi to hide being a Dedede main)
•She’ll occasionally rant about other series too, but Kirby is the biggest example.
•Despite this, she’s actually a pretty good player, even if she can be a bit to sadistic with down special sometimes.
Kiibo
•Refuses to touch ROB or MegaMan to avoid falling into the stereotype of the robot playing the robots.
•Instead picks Pyra and Mythra cause they’re great characters with a bit of computer theme that only Tsumugi knows about mercifully hasn’t ranted on yet.
•Plays very predictably, but just because you know a Lightning Buster- Prominence Revolt is coming doesn't mean blocking it is easier.
•As such is usually in the middle of the pack tournament wise. •Refuses to use side B as Pyra because one time he did and Kokichi did a stupid combo which took him from 30% to death so he’s not taking any chances again.
•Tends to put The stage on random, which he occasionally regrets if he rolls a side scroller.
Himiko Yumeno:
•Mains ALL the magic users. •Robin, Zelda, Hero, Sephiroth, so long as they have a big focus on magic she’s all in.
•Tends to use Hero the most, specifically Eight, because she likes the MP gauge.
•Despite seemingly never practicing and only doing okay with most moves, is the fastest thing in the freaking world at picking the right spell. If she gets magic burst or Kamikaze, prepare to die.
•Everyone assumes she’s probably played Dragon Quest cause of this, but she hasn’t confirmed and just chalks her skill up to magic.
•The only one who can make Tenko stop raging.
•Keeping with the theme, will usually pick the World Tree stage.
Maki Harukawa
•Messed around with everyone a bit but was only super good as Zero Suit Samus.
•Even then she’s mostly middle of the pack, but she doesn’t mind too much.
•Unless she looses to Kokichi, then it’s a struggle for Kaito and Kirumi to stop her from killing him.
•Tends to handle snacks cause Kirumi has to be in the room to keep order and she usually gets knocked out early. •The most frequent subject of Kaito’s tips, which range from helpful to ”Kaito I don’t have a f**king Luma”
•Tends to pick Shadow Moses island cause she likes the look, and though she won’t tell anyone she loves the music
#If you have any different main suggestions let me know#And yes this is the same continuity as the Saihara Games#This how they’re settling issues now?#Side Mode Au#Danganronpa#Danganronpa V3#Danganronpa Killing harmony#Shuichi Saihara#kaede akamatsu#Rantaro Amami#Ryoma Hoshi#Kirumi Tojo#Angie Yonaga#tenko chabashira#Korekiyo shinguuji#Gonta Gokuhara#Miu Ituma#Kaito Momota#Kokichi Oma#Tsumugi Shirogane#Kiibo#K1-B0#Himiko Yumeno#Maki Harukawa
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now or never
Sooo... my last smut (and my first ever) got such good feedback so I'm back with another one! This is based on nr. 47 on a smut prompt list which is: "Were you just mast*rb*ting?"
Enjoy! And lemme know what you think
Read here or on AO3
RATED E
He had really tried to fight it. So hard. He really had.
Alas, at some point, will and pride just hadn’t been enough which meant Jake had given into the temptation of sneaking away from the rest of the Santiago family; a temptation which had been knocking on the door to his mind for quite some time. Weak as he was he gave in. More specifically he managed to sneak off to Amy’s childhood bedroom - a tiny, tidy room with a queen-sized bed where he and Amy always slept whenever they stayed at her parents’ house - where he quickly had kicked off his jeans and boxers before getting under the covers.
The walk to the upstairs bedroom from the garden, the place where the entire family consisting of 20 plus people were hanging out, playing games and drinking, had at first felt like an obvious walk of shame. Although the second he noticed that everyone was too busy enjoying the sunny weather to notice him, even less questioning his walking away, he figured he was safe. It was natural - it was okay.
Of course, naturally, he and Amy didn’t get down and dirty every single night, especially not after becoming parents, but the week leading up to this getaway had been extra busy. They hadn’t been gifted any time or energy to enjoy each other. And then there he was: week two without any kind of “adult fun” (how they addressed it around Mac) and he was slowly but surely going insane. It sure didn’t help that kept replaying Amy getting dressed in her nice (lacy) underwear that morning. He would’ve acted on it if she hadn’t picked their 6-month old up from his travel crib the second she was dressed leaving him no room to intervene whatsoever. So there he was: under the covers of his and Amy’s bed for the week with his hand hidden under the cream-coloured covers as it dutifully stroked his boner - one he felt like he’d had constantly since their first night at her parents’ house. His gorgeous and stupid hot wife was both a blessing and a curse.
He’d basically kicked off his pants and boxers the second the door closed behind him, he didn’t want to be away from everyone else for too long after all, and now the clothing lay abandoned and undone on the bedroom floor as he slowly ran his right hand down his already half-hard shaft.
“Fuck,” he hissed. It was far from his ideal way of taking care of said problem: he’d much rather be helped by his wife, but he also knew and respected how she felt about sex at her parents’ house. Especially when her entire side of the family was there as well. The odds of getting caught were not exactly on their side.
He let his mind slip into a vivid daydream, pictures of Amy in the red lingerie he’d bought for her on valentines day (just before they found out they were pregnant) writhing her beautiful body the way she knew would drive him insane. There was no denying the fact that at this stage the mental images of his wife alone could’ve gotten him there, but when you’re in a Santiago household with the entire family visiting there’s no time for patience, Jake knew, so his hand accompanied with a grip around his cock working its way up and down on repeat.
“F-fuck,” unable to suppress them, occasionally small whimpers and groans would escape him. Even though they were kept to a minimum they, to Jake’s oblivion and ignorance, were loud enough to immediately catch his wife’s attention when she as silently as possible, thinking her husband was gone to take a nap (being with the entire Santiago-family for so long definitely earned him that privilege), walked into the room. She hadn’t thought much of his absence but now having entered the room it was clear as day what was actually going on.
Jake, on his part, mid-bliss and nearing his climax was almost too caught up to notice anything at all. Then again Amy’s childhood bedroom was far from big enough for Amy to remain unnoticed. The second his eyes drifted just a bit open they shot open wide in shock and his hand came to a rough halt even though it pained him to leave himself hanging this close to the edge.
“Ames!”
His wife froze like a deer in headlights and for sure knew what was going on in the room she’d just barely entered. There was a moment of silence, just briefly and long enough for Amy to form a sentence.
“Were you just masturbating?”
Fair question, he thought.
“Uh-” Jake stuttered trying to come up with an explanation only to realize that there was no way around the truth. “Yes.”
Of course she would never be disgusted or mad, Jake knew (his wife loves him in any sexy context) but he did have to admit that he was surprised when she let the bunch of Mac’s baby toys she’d been holding fall to the floor. Nothing was said to explain the action further and it only made sense to him when she, within a matter of seconds, successfully shifted from shocked to flipping on her own switch. Next thing he knew he was watching her unbutton her jeans and wiggling out of them.
“I left Mac with my parents telling them I was going to put away his toys and then mash him some bananas-,” she informed him abruptly after succeeding to kick the jeans off and away to a corner of the room before walking over to him in bed,“-which means we have approximately 10 minutes before my absence will be categorized as suspicious.”
The way she informed him, promptly and with any insecurity, had Jake feel like he was back at the academy being bossed around. Only this time he didn’t mind one bit - especially when she climbed the bed first, then under the covers onto him to straddle his naked hips.
“You up for the challenge?”
It all happened so fast: from the second Jake discovered her in the room to then having her on top of him, and it’s safe to say that he was just a tad confused. Yet also horny and turned on enough to put two and two together fast enough to reply before she got too impatient.
“Uh- ready? For what?”
Of course he was ready! He was mid-buildup to a climax he needed very badly and he could’ve very well just...gone for it. Yet when his wife was bold and brief like this, it always scrambled up his mind and flipped his plans upside down. God, she was hot - even in her casual mom-wear (jeans, now on the floor, and one of Jake’s flannels tied at the waist to crop it and accentuate her curves. All of this paired with the perfect messy bun).
“Efficient intercourse,” she proved her point by grinding down to feel his already hard cock earning herself the delicious sound of Jake letting out a soft moan. “You feel ready to me. Ahead even. A prepared man - I love that.”
“Gosh,” he breathed out through his gritted teeth taking a hold of her hips, a part of her who always felt like the most perfect soft yet sculpted handful for him. “If I wasn’t already so fucking turned on and way past reasonable judgement I would so tell you to never call it efficient intercourse ever again…”
Amy chuckled in return both at his comment but mostly as a sound of enjoyment at the fact that her husband was a mess beneath her.
“... But I won’t even bother at this point. God, Ames… I really need this.”
It was his turn to grind and his hands dutifully accompanied her hips into a grind of their own to meet his desperate sway. He needed her so bad. Lucky for him Amy was quick to oblige and without delay Jake got to feel her soft lips against his. They kiss every day and it never feels not amazing, even the smallest pecks, but that kiss right then and there? It was on fire and it was as if they were kissing for the last time. It quickly grew into a hot and heavy, horny teenager-ish makeout session. Safe to say that shared between the two of them there is no shame. The pent up parents-syndrome was so very real.
“You’re already so hard, babe,” Amy managed to let out between clashing lips and the small sounds of pleasure, calling out for each other, that they shared. “Can’t believe you had your own fun without me.”
“It’s never really fun without you, Ames,” Jake was quick to counter and it was obvious that she smiled into the kiss at the remark. A smile was the best thing his word could bring out of her. “Just a less-fun substitute.”
“Poor thing. Let's put that less-fun substitute you had before me to good use then, shall we?”
Amy straightened back up and raised herself to stand on her knees allowing her to push down the edges of her panties, not all the way but just enough to expose the part of her he so shamelessly was craving to see and more importantly feel. The fabric never got further than mid-thigh but then and there it was enough: Jake’s hand reached past the already damp fabric and unhesitatingly began stroking her already lower lips with the entire surface of his palm. Amy’s hips were quick to join the rhythm of his fingers by grinding to meet him. Bit by bit he added fingers to provide more enjoyment successfully earning him small whimpers. Loud enough for them to clearly hear but controlled enough to not draw any attention to what they were currently doing if someone were to walk by their room.
It was truly a sight to die for, Jake thought, looking up at his gorgeous wife as she quickly built up a sweat that competed with the wetness developing in-between her folds.
“As much as-” she was interrupted by her own impossibility to hold back a whimper when he crooked his finger just right brushing her clit. He kept feeling her at the same angle to make sure no enjoyment was lost but still she fought to finish her sentence. “-as much as I love this...” she thrusted into his hand with more drive than before as emphasis earning her a groan in return before continuing, “... I need you to fuck me before someone becomes suspicious. We can do proper foreplay some other day.”
“When? In another 6 months?”
Jake’s voice was drenched in sarcasm. He loves his son with a capital L although that doesn’t change the fact that he does miss having all the time in the world to please his wife as she so rightfully deserves. Foreplay, loads of it, taking his time with her and allowing her to do the same with him? It was rare these days. A baby with no respect for intimacy will do that.
“Shut up,” she grabbed his shaft to give it a few strokes in preparation as she slowly let her knees bend sinking down towards the awaiting tip. “Panties,” she commanded and Jake immediately complied by pushing the obstacle to the side. Time was of the essence and having to search for a pair of slung away panties afterwards wasn’t something they’d have the time for; keeping them on was definitely the most efficient way to tackle the problem.
Jake had barely got the fabric out of their way when he was swept into another (dearly missed) world by the feeling of his wife’s warm wetness surrounding his shaft. He knew, of course, but once again he was in a total state of euphoria at this great reminder of the fact that nothing would ever beat the feeling of Amy Santiago - especially not his own sad hand.
“F-fuck,” she stuttered head immediately thrown back, half-undone bun dangling and eyes closed trying to contain the overwhelming feeling of pleasure washing over her as she took her time sliding all the way down onto him.
“So good,” he breathed heavily as his hands found their way to her hips as if to stabilize her quaking thighs throughout her progression down onto him. Soon she reached the goal, filled up by him entirely, and after taking in the dearly missed burning sensation she picked up a rhythm bringing her right back up to the tip of his cock before going back down on it with even more power than the previous time. And so it kept going, picking up pace with every thrust, power of the thrusts escalating, and the two parents gave into the craving for each which they’d subdued for so long. So long that it seemed like forever.
“Y-Yes, yes, yes!”
Her words, or rather barely understandable high pitched whines, were only just kept low enough to keep secret but loud enough for him to enjoy like his own little intimate performance. One hand left her hip bone sliding back to grip her ass cheek. A
“Keep quiet, okay?” he warned looking up at her with a commanding glance that would leave her wanting to question what he meant. But there was no time: as soon as he figured the coast behind their bedroom door was clear (at least he really hoped it was) his hand left her ass only to come back to it in the shape of a smack that was definitely a bit louder than intended - so was the moan it earned him. Whether it was because they were so cautious about their noises or it actually was loud, Jake prayed no one walked by right then and there. “Shh, Ames.”
“Jake,” she carefully whined obviously back to being in control of her voice’s volume. “That felt so good… This feels so good.”
“I know, babe, but keep quiet. You don’t want your family to hear us, right?”
He immediately realised it kinda came out as sexy-talk but he actually meant it. She would kill herself and him if they were to be caught. With no hesitation.
“I almost don’t care.”
“Oh, trust me… You do, babe.”
In hopes of keeping her mind off of the anticipation, the fear but also the excitement of doing what they were doing, her hips picked up speed. She leaned forward to share a kiss with her husband, probably the deepest in a while, which would hopefully muffle whatever future too loud sounds her body failed to control. The second they both felt what the slight change of angle did they were both thankful for Amy’s decision to initiate a kiss: he entered her just right and the shock of pleasure it sent through them both was worthy of a tiny scream. Alas a scream she had to fight to tone down to a loud whimper muffled by her husband’s hungry lips and moans in return.
“I’m so close already,” he pulled back to breathe the words heavily into her sweaty temple as their pace only grew faster, deeper, as his fingers dug into the soft flesh of her ass in support.
“M-me too. Embarrassingly close. I needed this.”
“You look so fucking good in my flannel. Even better when on top of me like this.”
Amy was just as out of breath and straightened back up, or at least halfway, to grab the wooden headboard rising from the top of the bed before her. This would work as support for the last stretch, Amy thought to herself, as she reached a pace even she was surprised by. Perhaps that was what being pent up did to her: gave her superpowers in bed. Jake definitely noticed and within seconds they were both fighting to control moans and whimpers as they chased their climax.
“Right there,” he breathed pulling her in closer to him by her ass. “Yes, Ames. Now, now, now-” he was cut off by himself reaching the peak, bursting into his still grinding wife causing his mess of words and sounds transcending into one last dragged out sound of pleasure as his hips rolled with her through the aftershock.
“A-a-almost,” Amy accompanied the sounds of his climax looking deeply into her favorite sight: the sight of her climaxing husband’s blank eyes and gaping mouth. One thrust, two thrusts, three thrusts-
“Yeeesss, Jake,” she hissed louder than intended with her head thrown back and knuckles white from holding onto the headboard as she came just seconds after her husband. After giving their almost synchronised climax a few soothing thrusts, per se, a ride through the entirety, they both came to a halt. Jake still inside of her. Amy still gripping onto the headboard looking down between her reached out arms and down at him.
The silence let the other know that they were indeed literally speechless. It didn’t last last long though: a voice belonging to non-other than Amy’s mother came from what sounded like downstairs and sweeped the intimate atmosphere like an exploding bomb.
“Amy, Mija! Mac has been non-stop crying for five minutes now. I think he’s hungry!”
“Shit!”
And never before has Amy flown off her husband's body and gotten re-dressed with such speed. At least she’d kept her panties and his flannel on.
“Coming, mom! Just need to find something in our room!” She yelled back in panic hoping it would gain her some time and hopefully keep her mom downstairs. Meanwhile her husband admired the chaotic scene with a toothy grin on his face. “Worth it?” he asked curiously.
She might’ve been mid-closing pants, more afraid of being caught than ever before, yet it didn’t keep her from answering “Definitely” with a dark look in her eyes paired with a devilish smile as she threw her mussed hair into a new messy bun that didn’t make her look like she’d been fucked into another world (which she had but shh).
Man, he loved her.
#jake and amy#smut#peraltiago#peraltiago fic#oneshot#jake x amy#b99#brooklyn nine-nine#brooklyn 99#brooklyn nine nine#peralta#santiago#fanfic#fanfiction#jake peralta#amy santiago
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Humans Are Historically Known for Being Terrible
Hi I’m here with an opinion today. Let’s see how many words it will take for me to adequately get it across on this very fine 15th of January
I personally believe canceling things from the past* is fruitless, pointless, and accomplishes about as much as censorship does
*We aren’t talking about shit like nazi Germany, let me elaborate further
So, as I occasionally do, I have seen a post on my dash today criticizing something historical that people are ‘problematically partaking in.’ That thing today was the wellerman sea shanty due to its ties with colonialism, slavery, and so forth.
I’m not going to dive into this specific example, because I don’t know enough of the details and am not interested in going to find them out because I’m not planning to defend it or its history, so there’s no point. I learned what I needed to know from said callout post and it’s enough to work with.
To me, it is important that we remember that people, in general, have been historically pretty terrible.
There’s colonialism, there’s slavery (of all kinds, including chattel), there’s thievery, murder, genocide, sexism, the murdering of queers. There’s lying, manipulation, propaganda, and so many more things that I couldn’t possibly list them all. I’m not saying that everyone was equally shitty. I am aware that, especially in the most recent couple hundred years, white people, especially Western Europeans and Americans, have been pretty Shite.
Am I excusing them for their actions? Absolutely not. I think it is always important to bear in mind the way they played a part in cultures’ growth, death, and, ultimately, development from one year to the next.
The reason I’m pointing this out is because the result of people being historically shitty is that most, if not all, of our historical content, our history, is steeped in horse manure.
There is not one thing you can enjoy from centuries - even decades - passed that is not here because of something inhumane, unjust, or otherwise terrible.
The only thing keeping us from canceling every other historical thing that we enjoy is our lack of awareness of how each thing ties into the whole mess.
So, we’ve learned that wellerman was sung by slavers and thieves and colonialists. What about that nice little folk song from uh, idk, Ireland or something? Let’s take this metaphorical song and ask the question, “who wrote it?” The truth is, for many folk songs, we just don’t know. There is a very very good chance that 90+ percent of nice, soft folk songs about lying in the grass or feeding chickens or baking bread for your spouse were written by racists, sexists, abusers, homophobes, and so forth.
Does that make it wrong to enjoy that song about lying in the grass and looking at the stars? I don’t think so. No one is profiting off of you listening to it, regardless of who wrote it. It’s hundreds of years old. Do you even know the name of who wrote it?
Remembering that times were different may not absolve something of its wrongdoing, but it does provide us context.
We have to allow ourselves to admit that most, if not all, historical things, came from or benefitted from atrocities or injustices that we would not stand for today. That’s just how human progression works. Frankly, if people 200 years from now don’t look at US, CURRENTLY, and think we’re terrible assholes, I am actually very concerned by that.
The nature of humanity is to get better and better over time and to build a world and a society where we don’t feel the need to be controlled by greed or to consume unethically. The problem is, it takes time. It takes lots and lots of time. Would it take less time if certain people weren’t terrible, terrible people? Yes it would. But they are, and so it doesn’t.
The fact is, human progression and improvement will never reach its end because, as things improve, our perception of our past actions will change as well and we will begin to realize that what we were doing wasn’t acceptable and is no longer necessary nor excusable.
Hate Jeff Bezos? Look around and see that 90% of people still buy from Amazon, because it provides the only affordable source of many products for people who don’t make enough money under capitalism to buy from a small business.
Hate Bill Gates? How many of us are willing to switch to Linux to quit using Microsoft? Speaking of Microsoft, they own Minecraft. Do we stop playing Minecraft?
Think Steve Jobs is a terrible person? Why are people still buying iphones, ipads, and macs? Why don’t we stop buying those so that he and current CEO, Tim Cook, quit making billions of dollars?
These are just a tiny amount of examples, using big names. We also must consider, if you have 100 books on your bookshelf, how many of the writers of those books are racists, homophobes, sexists, or abusers? I guarantee you it’s a non-zero answer. The thing is, an author who’s relatively nobody is not someone who gets canceled. No one knows anything about them but that they wrote a neat work of fiction and it’s a good book.
The question is, should we be expected to quit buying, consuming, and enjoying things made by problematic people?
In some cases, the answer should be yes. If someone is currently profiting massively from people consuming their media or products and people are ignoring their atrocities, that person could end u making millions or billions of dollars despite being terrible, which is something that undoubtedly affects all of us, economically.
In the other cases, the answer should be, do you want to? If you’re not comfortable with something, you should, of course, stop consuming it. If you can ignore the thing, you might not need to bother. And, that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re excusing it.
If we look at all of humanity, even in the present day, mathematically speaking, 50% of people are more bigoted and terrible than the rest. There’s no other way for it to be. Less than 50% would be a mathematical fallacy. Does that mean we only consume content from the better 50%? Does that mean we rigorously research producers and creators and their personal lives only to decide it’s not worth the risk of ‘contributing’ because they have no trace online except for a private Facebook account? Is them having a Facebook account enough of a ‘sin’ that it’s not worth it to buy their book?
This brings us to the censorship point
If you know your history, you know that censorship is a nasty thing. When one person decides who or what is unethical to consume from, they sometimes seek to get rid of that thing so that no one has a choice - so that no one is Allowed to consume that thing.
This has led to book burning, the destroying of decades and centuries of research about sexuality and gender. It’s destroyed religious texts. It’s destroyed content created by women that painted any single man in a bad light. It’s destroyed progression.
“But I only want to get rid of the bad thing that everyone agrees is bad!”
It doesn’t matter. If you open the door to censorship for yourself, those who wish to use it for worse reasons will become just as justified, in their own eyes, to do the same. You’ll have Christians saying it’s okay to get rid of gay content because it’s objectively wrong according to the bible. You’ll have conservative parents burning books with complicated topics like abuse and assault because they don’t want their children to have access to anything controversial or complex like that.
You cannot open the door to censorship for one group without opening that door for everyone. And that is why we do not censor things.
The question then becomes, but what of the people consuming that media? Even if it’s not censored, consuming it still makes someone bad, right?
Not necessarily. People consume problematic stuff all the time - things considered objectively bad. However, people don’t always consume said media because they support it being normalized in the real world. For example, fanfiction or books with rape in them may be something a victim reads to cope with their own past or present. A book with abuse depicted may actually make a young teen aware that what they’re going through is abuse. Content largely seen as ‘problematic’ can often play a part in solving the problem it portrays.
Then there’s historical, problematic media. Now, this is an area where I feel things have actually been OVER complicated.
Because everything historical has some tie to injustice, there is no ethical way to consume it.
There is no ethical consumption under passed time.
So, how do we judge whether something should or shouldn’t be consumed? It is my opinion that something historical should stop being consumed and become shunned when its meaning is well-known enough and its message is still pervasive enough that it is actively causing problems.
For example, we generally try not to consume content when it is made by someone who is a known nazi. This is because nazis are still a problem in our society, presently. We have antisemitism all over the place. Therefore, we cannot let the message become that it is okay to be a nazi by way of us treating nazis like normal people and allowing them to succeed in society without consequence.
However, there are certain problems that are no longer particularly prevalent or which are agreed to be terrible on a large enough scale that consuming the content does not necessarily imply you believe it is okay. For example, if you look at literally any media from the 1800s or which is placed in the 1800s, you will see a lot of casual sexism and gender roles. Should we despise that time period because sexism was readily available at every turn? Should we refuse to enjoy 19th century fashion or culture because it had problems? I think not. I think it would be pointless to refuse to consume, read about, or otherwise engage with the 19th century. It wouldn’t change the past and it isn’t going to somehow undo the progress we’ve made on women’s rights.
As a matter of fact, if someone merely suggested that perhaps the people of the 19th century were right for forcing women to wear long dresses and darn socks all day, they would be laughed into oblivion and called a shitty, sexist incel (which would be correct).
Does enjoying media from or placed in the 19th century mean you support sexism? I certainly hope not, since I enjoy it very much and know a lot of progressive people, women especially, who do enjoy that kind of thing. It is common sense enough, at this point in time, that people don’t generally believe that the sexism of the 1800s was acceptable. I am not going to see someone watching a period drama and assume they desire for our present-day social laws to be like what’s portrayed. That would be a ridiculous assumption. However, I could not assume the same about someone I saw watching openly antisemitic content. I would quickly wonder if they’re an antisemite/nazi/white supremacist.
So, what about that one thing I heard had a sordid past?
Listen, if we’re being honest here, most things from history have a sordid past. Sea shanties? You bet. But then when we talk of sea shanties being steeped in colonialism, we have to look at the bigger picture. What about pirates? Pirates were, by and large, a huge contributor to slavery, theft, colonialism, and murder. Does that mean enjoying media with pirates is glorifying or contributing to slavery, theft, colonialism, and murder?
(I’m about to talk a lot about pirates but this can be applied to anything that was historically bad but is no longer prevalent)
Pirates of the Caribbean is only a movie, but pirates did once exist and they did kill people. They did raid ships of merchants and tradesmen and they killed them and stole their goods. They took many good men from their families and even killed working children aboard the ships. Does that make enjoying pirates in media a contributor to these things? No. It doesn’t. We are looking at a dramatised, cleaned up version of the original piracy. I think most people are aware that pirates, in the real world, are bad and harmful and should not be supported. That doesn’t make pirate media any less fun in theory, and under our own terms.
Then we arrive at our perception - because most of this does come down to perception. When you watch pirate media, should you enjoy that, are you able to divorce yourself from their actual history enough to enjoy the media? If you can, you might enjoy it a lot. If you can’t watch a movie about pirates without thinking the entire time about how terrible they were and how much damage they did, then pirate media just isn’t right for you. But, it doesn’t mean you should attempt to take it away from others. Your opinion and perception of pirate media is not the global perception.
I have to ask, do you think others view it the same way you do?
When you read that question, you may be wondering what exactly I mean. What I’m asking is, do you believe others view that media with the same “clarity” that you do? Do you believe they understand the atrocity of real pirates and Feel that the entire time they watch the media and still enjoy it anyway?
Perhaps that’s why your response to someone enjoying something you feel guilty partaking in is, “these people all must not care about the real-world damage pirates did. The fact that they can watch this (despite sitting here and feeling the same things I do) makes me sick.”
However, if that is the case, you must remember that for a lot of people, the awareness of real world consequence is suspended during dramatised depictions of it. It doesn’t mean they have forgotten about the real-world consequences of piracy or that they don’t know it at all. It just means they are choosing not to think about it in that light while consuming media.
There is also the assumption that people must not know about something when partaking in it. You may think, “How can they enjoy this media? They wouldn’t be able to stomach it if they realized what really happened with pirates.”
In many instances, you would be correct. A lot of people are ignorant to what pirates have done in the real world. If you told every ignorant person the truth, maybe 5% of them would then become turned off by pirate media, and the other 95% would keep the truth in mind and then divorce themselves from it to continue enjoying said media.
There are realities that it is safe to divorce yourself from, and there are those that are not.
Is allowing yourself to enjoy dramatizations of pirates making you ignorant to present day conditions? Not largely. There are still pirates today, but not nearly enough for the average Joe to need to take them seriously. Those who need to know about them and do something to stop them are aware.
However, it is not safe to divorce yourself from, for instance, the holocaust. Divorcing yourself from the holocaust and seeing it as merely a dramatic setting with dramatic events and not a present-day real-world problem is exactly the kind of thing that leads to young teens being sucked in by white supremacy and naziism as well as what leads to many average conservatives believing the rise in white supremacy isn’t actually real or is not a big deal. They have distanced themselves so far from the real-world atrocity of the holocaust that they have forgotten it was real and that real people, like them, were contributors. They don’t want to believe that everyday people had any power in it and that it was tiny acts of willful ignorance that made concentration camps so successful.
All in all, there is a different answer for everything we consume.
Want to know if something you’re consuming is okay to consume? Ask yourself: is this produced by someone who is contributing to present-day conditions? If the answer is yes, quit consuming it. If the answer is no, ask yourself, does this media make me uncomfortable because I’m aware of its roots? If the answer is yes, stop consuming it. If the answer is no, it’s probably fine. You are most likely not doing any damage, so long as you are aware of what is wrong with the content and are not using it as grounds to perpetuate harm.
If, when thinking about something problematic in an old piece of media, you cringe? You’re on the right track. If you feel inclined to make excuses for it or justify the wrong in it, it’s time to step away and reevaluate why you feel the need to do so. If you’re doing so because you feel guilty for consuming it, you need to realize that it is actually more harmful to make excuses for the wrong in order to justify your consumption than it is to admit, “Yeah, this media is problematic and contains a lot of sexism, but I still enjoy it for its other qualities.” It is better to admit that you enjoy something problematic than to spread the message that what is happening in it is okay.
Some of you may be thinking, “Or, just stop consuming problematic media.”
I think in many cases, especially recent media, where your consumption has an effect on production, this is true. However, for media that is no longer being produced, I will remind you that most things have something wrong with them - yes, even pretty recent stuff.
Supernatural kills off women constantly, queerbaited the fuck out of its viewers, and sent a huge character to fucking mega hell for confessing his love.
Scrubs has no end to its sexism, transphobic and homophobic slur usage, and other problematic content.
V for Vendetta glorifies and shines a heroic light on a character who kidnaps and tortures a woman for what appeared to have been weeks or months so that she would be forced to understand his trauma and “no longer be afraid.”
Star Wars has incest, the producers/directors abused Carrie Fisher and sexualized her as a young teen, and probably a lot more that I’m not aware of because I haven’t seen the movies nor read the books.
I don’t even need to start on shows like Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, Community, That 70s Show, and so many more. Almost every popular piece of media has something worth canceling in it. There is no point trying to curate your media consumption to only unproblematic content, because it simply can’t be done.
Curate where it makes a difference. Sigh heavily the rest of the time. Make yourself aware what and how things are problematic. Put critical thought into how your consumption is capable of supporting or perpetuating a problem and how it is not. Make informed decisions.
Do not feel guilty if you are unable to flawlessly live up to the standards of purity culture. None of us can - not really.
#long#longpost#long post#racism mention#antisemitism mention#nazi mention#holocaust mention#sexism mention#transphobia mention#homophobia mention#spn#supernatural#pirates of the caribbean#pirates#potc#scrubs#got#game of thrones#breaking bad#community#that 70s show#sorry im a bitch and tag everything i talk about in my posts so people with it blacklisted dont have to see#media#purity culture#cancel culture#wellerman#piracy#sea shanties#problematic#psa
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Fanfic Tag (bc, Sunday)
I was tagged by @waitingforthestarstofall and @disappearinginq who are two of my favorite enablers over here. And according to at least one of them, there are no rules in this game, which means my replying many moons later is all good (right?).
Questions:
Ao3 Name: gaelicspirit (same on FF.net)
Fandoms: Supernatural, The Young Riders, White Collar, Hawaii Five-0, Sons of Anarchy (all only on FF.net), The Musketeers, Daredevil, Teen Wolf, Timeless, MacGyver, Magnum, P.I. (on both Ao3 and FF.net)
Number of fics: 75 (+ 1 WIP)
1. Fic you spent the most time on: From Yesterday
2. Fic you spent the least time on: Raincheck
3. Longest Fic: From Yesterday (286,050 words)
4. Shortest Fic: Sacrifice (2,315 words)
5. Most hits: Devil to Pay (on Ao3...no clue on FF.net)
6. Most kudos: Devil’s Own (huh, I’ve never compared these stats before...maybe I should write more Daredevil)
7. Most comment threads: Devil’s Own (on Ao3), Ramble On (on FF.net)
8. Fave Fic you wrote: This is a toughie. I love them all when I’m writing them...I think maybe it’s a 3-way tie between War Scars, From Yesterday, and Conairt. The first two were as AU as I generally get (I’ve a tendency to be a bit canon-bound) and that was fun to explore possibilities with those characters, and the 3rd was basically the story I wanted to read but couldn’t find anywhere...so I wrote it myself.
9. Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: Hmmm. I don’t know that I’d actually rewrite any of them. They exist in my mind the moment they’re being created and then once out there in the world for all to see, that’s who they are, scars and all. I have occasionally thought about expanding on my White Collar story, Fortunate Son to explore what happened next. Though, now that the show has ended, it would be 100% AU. I guess anything I would really want to take further would be a new story in and of itself, so it wouldn’t really count as “expanding” on it.
10. Share a bit of your WIP or share a story idea that you’re planning:
I started another MacGyver fic last weekend called “Hello to the Night.” I’m about 25K-ish words into it and still playing it out. It’s a bit of pandemic therapy for me, to be honest. It’s really hard to get out of my own head these days, it seems. Premise: Set around S4 episodes 9 and 10. Turns out emotional trauma + concussions + experimental drugs don’t mix quite as easily as one might think. Mac’s dark side does more than toss him a creepy grin from the other side of a window when getting “lost in his head” is taken up a notch.
Excerpt:
Another streak of light cut like a white-hot tracer bullet across the darkest part of the sky.
“You out here making wishes on shooting stars?” Bozer asked, tapping the back of his fingers into the palm of his opposite hand.
It caught his attention then that Mac was clad only in a T-shirt and shorts; it almost looked like they were the clothes he’d gone to sleep in, not grabbed for a planned midnight run.
“These aren’t stars,” Mac corrected him, his voice sounding strangely detached from the moment. “That light is caused by dust and rock falling through the atmosphere and burning up—happens when the Earth passes through a trail of debris left by a comet as it orbits the Sun.”
Bozer felt his mouth tug up in a reflexive grin. “Is that right?”
“My dad gave me my first telescope when I was eight,” Mac continued in the same, oddly modulated tone, as if he were speaking in a dream. “Showed me how to find the constellations, track comets. I took it apart one day and he wouldn’t help me put it back together again. Said I obviously needed to know how it worked, so I should figure it out.”
Bozer remembered that telescope. He remembered James MacGyver’s stern face as Mac worked to rebuild it from the collection of parts scattered around them in piles organized by size and use. He remembered fearing that face.
“I did, too. Figure it out.”
“Yeah, I know, man,” Bozer smiled, watching Mac watch the starts. He frowned a little when he saw a hard shiver chase its way through Mac’s slim frame, though the blond man didn’t seem to notice.
“It’s like they were mine, y’know?”
Bozer’s frown deepened. “What—”
“And for a little bit there, it felt like he gave them to me,” Mac continued as though Bozer hadn’t spoken. “Like the whole universe was mine because he let me see it. But…,” Mac shook his head, his eyes distant as they tracked down from the sky and skimmed the horizon in front of them. “Then he took them away. He took them with him when he left. And I can’t figure out how to get them back. I keep trying, but…they’re just…,” he looked back up at the night sky, “they’re so far away.”
Bozer reached out and rested his fingertips on Mac’s bare arm, flinching back a little when he felt how chilled his friend’s skin was. He couldn’t see it before, but with that touch he realized Mac was shivering consistently now.
“Hey, Mac, you okay, man?”
Mac blinked, looking down at Bozer’s fingers on his arm, then frowned. He glanced around him slowly, tracking over to his left until their eyes met.
“Bozer?”
“Yeah?”
“What…what are you doing here?”
Bozer blinked, his eyebrows climbing his forehead. He tightened his grip on Mac, wrapping his fingers around his friend’s forearm until he felt the other man’s shivers through the bones of his hand.
“I was looking for you,” Bozer said truthfully, trying to keep the worry from his voice as he watched Mac look around him, over his shoulder to where the Griffith’s domed building loomed in the shadows, then back across the dark horizon to the lights of Los Angeles. “You decide to go for a midnight run or something?”
Mac swallowed hard, reaching up with a trembling hand to rub at his forehead. Bozer recalled his tired voice claiming his headache had a headache earlier that day—no, last night—in the lab. He dropped his hand and looked around again and Bozer realized what he was seeing was a growing awareness and recognition—and it frightened him.
“What the hell are we doing out here?” Mac asked, his voice sounding thin, baffled.
“Mac,” Bozer gripped his arm tighter. “I found you out here.”
Mac looked at him, blue eyes cloudy with confusion. “What?”
“I found you, man.”
Mac darted his tongue out, wetting dry lips, his shivering increasing until Bozer saw his teeth start to chatter.
“I don’t…I don’t remember…,” he shook his head. “I don’t remember leaving the house.”
Bozer folded his lower lip against his teeth, biting it to keep whatever noise that wanted to escape a prisoner. “Well, how ‘bout we head back there now?”
Mac nodded shakily and moved to slide off the fence. Bozer saw in a split second the ground was too far below him for Mac to land safely. He thrust out his arm and braced his friend, swinging his leg back over the fence to the paved walkway and pulling Mac backwards with him. Mac scrambled to find his footing, standing on trembling legs as he gripped Bozer’s shoulders.
“Holy shit,” Mac took a stuttering breath as if he’d forgotten that was what his lungs were supposed to do, straightening slowly. “How the hell did I…?”
Bozer shook his head. “How about we don’t worry about that right now, huh?”
Mac nodded, his eyes still on the drop-off on the other side of the fence.
“C’mon, man,” Bozer turned Mac toward the parking lot, keeping one hand on his friend’s arm, the other on his lower back. “It’s late and I’m cold.” He wasn’t, but it was always easier to get Mac to act if he was doing so on behalf of someone else.
“Yeah,” Mac nodded. “Yeah, sure, of course. Boze, I’m—”
“Don’t,” Bozer pushed him gently forward. “Don’t worry about it, man. Yesterday was weird for everybody.”
“Yesterday?” Mac asked, the word tripping out on a faltering breath as his shivers increased.
Bozer pressed his fingertips harder into Mac’s lower back, feeling the corded muscles there tighten against the pressure. “Yeah, y’know…crazy DARPA drug, Tesla weapon….”
“That was yesterday?” Mac asked, blinking owlishly at him.
“Time flies when you’re trippin’, man.”
Mac didn’t reply and didn’t resist as Bozer continued to guide him toward the parking lot. He stumbled over his own feet—any coltish grace that once guided him having vacated in the wake of whatever this was. Bozer steadied him, noting that while Mac didn’t quite lean into him, he needed the support.
“Easy, man,” Bozer wrapped an arm around Mac’s slim waist, pulling him flush against his side. “You’re moving like me after a night of whiskey.”
“That…doesn’t sound good,” Mac returned in the same spacey, confused tone. “You make some pretty bad choices ‘cause of whiskey.”
As they reached the car, Bozer shifted his hip to keep Mac propped up, pulling the passenger door open and maneuvering his friend into the seat.
“Yeah, well,” he reached across Mac’s shivering form to fasten his seat belt, “in whiskey’s defense, I’ve also made some pretty questionable choices completely sober.”
Mac huffed a semi-amused chuckle, his head dropping back against the seat. Bozer jogged around the back of the car to climb behind the wheel.
“Let’s crank that heat up, how ‘bout—” Bozer stopped as he glanced over and saw Mac had quite literally passed out, head tilted against the window.
His hands lay lax in his lap, fingers curled toward his palms, the left one twitching in what looked like an attempt to reach out, but not quite getting there.
“Jesus, Mac,” Bozer breathed, turning up the heat anyway as his friend shivered even in his sleep. He shrugged out of his hoodie, draping it over Mac’s bare arms and t-shirt covered torso.
Tagging: Okay, if you’ve already been tagged--or literally have no interest in this--feel free to ignore. This is a bit of a free-for-all here. @thethistlegirl @impossiblepluto @flowing-river24 @panchostokes @nativestarwrites @beamirang @21forestglades @blazeofobscurity @angus-mac-intosh @purplecolouredglasses @writtenbyblair @dashboardonfire @bands-space-and-monsters-oh-my @macgyverfever @thekristen999
#fanfic#fanfic tag#macgyver#wip excerpt#writing#multiple fandoms#favorite stories#supernatural#sons of anarchy#h50#the musketeers#magnum pi#timeless#daredevil#white collar#doing this instead of something else#not exactly hiding#but still kind of hiding
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・゚☀ good morning to everyone except those who hate on legend of korra ! skskskks i’m teddy , i’m a lil ole baby swinging back into the rpc heart emojis a - blazing ! this is my lil sunflower chaos seeker known as ripley , a newer muse for me but i’m really excited to flesh her out here with some extra spooky elements . i have a god awful sense of humor and too much enthusiasm for angst so tbh ? come get y’all PLOTTIN JUICE to distract me from thirsting over avatar kyoshi ! disc / ord is @𝐤𝐲𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐫 !#6439 since i’ll be mobile for the afternoon !
* [ bruna marquezine + cis female + she / her ] —— have you met tallulah ripley ? they are a twenty-two year old senior currently studying biology & music theory. they live on decker house, and word around campus is that this leo is vibrant + gregarious, as well as hedonistic + philophobic. i wonder if they’ll make it out alive. trailing sand in on the hardwood with bare feet , running late to meetings ( and asking forgiveness with a mere flash of a grin ) , tucking a greta van fleet album among the family collection of concierto classics .
EDIT : wanted and current connections can be found here !
youngest of four , born into an old money surname , her mother , an international student from sao paolo , brazil , and american father meet as competing pianists at holloway , falling in love , marrying , and beginning the next generation of the ripley virtuosos soon after graduation . her childhood is privileged and uneventful , strict and stifling as early as she can remember , tallulah causing trouble enough as if to make up for her perfectly behaved siblings .
her father becomes one of the most prolific modern composers of his time , and splits his efforts between composition and teaching music theory at julliard as his wife continues performances as a famed pianist . though her siblings branch out into other instruments , tallulah is the only one stubborn enough to weather the callouses on her fingers , figuring if she’s going to be forced to play an instrument of any type , it’ll at least be something she likes . thus , the only stringed instrument in the ripley household becomes hers as she takes on the cello by storm .
practicing cello is perhaps the only thing lu truly commits herself to — charming and sociable as she may be , her selectiveness with her efforts makes her sluggish with schoolwork as if to give her family a hard time . her siblings , all honor scholars and first chairs at their respective instruments , pick on her for her unmotivated wild child ways at the encouragement of her mother . the only person who takes the time to sit with tallulah and keep her on track is her ever - tired ( but endlessly generous ) father .
her world is turned upside down her freshman year when her father’s occasional stumble turns into a more regular struggle to keep his balance , an ultimate diagnosis of a degenerative disease rattling their family as they know it . tallulah , wild and only tamed by the kindness of one man , starts acting out in an effort to ignore the world around her . the rift between herself and her family only multiplies when she discovers her mother having an affair as her father’s health continues to decline .
he passes away on a vacation he and tallulah take to the ripley summer beach house , something they had done to have some quiet time together away from the judgement of her siblings . having to be the one to break the news to the family , she feels herself shut down and lose whatever desire she had left to live the perfect life her mother and siblings tried to force on her .
she starts going almost exclusively by her surname , making it into holloway more as a favor to her family’s generous donations to the music program than on grades . she’s barely hanging on by her involvement in the university’s symphonic orchestra , where she’s a first chair cellist that shows up late to every damn rehearsal and somehow can cold sightread well enough to piss everyone off ksksksk .
given this , she’s only minoring in music theory to stay in the orchestra , and partially to feel close to her dad . though her dream is to write music scores for films , she’s majoring in biology to have a respectable backup plan . if she can’t do music forever , she’ll disappear onto a beach somewhere in costa rica and be a marine biologist and never be heard from again lmao
PERSONALITY : ripley is happiest shotgunning a white claw before piling into the squad car and calling aux immediately ! loves her friends and sees her circle as found family that she would do anything for .
she’s laid back and observant , one of the quieter in the group as she tries to suss you out but is the first to approach a newbie and act as if you’ve been friends for ages . she makes an active effort to not judge others on the basis of first impressions and tends to be rather open minded when meeting others , which makes her a sort of universal friend - to - all ; given this , when wronged , she’s a stubborn little shit and though she wont let them live rent free in that headspace , she’ll go full send to making sure they’re aware they don’t exist to her !
she hates petty drama and tends to skirt most responsibility by sweet - talking her way out of things , giving the impression that she can be lazy or unmotivated . this is true to some extent , such as with her grades or her timeliness , but those who strike the right balance will see a side of ripley that is laser focused , whether its drunken ramblings about the brilliance of the chord progressions on fleetwood mac’s rumors or an astute observation about the emotion behind a certain cello movement . though she prefers to skip the hard thinking and just enjoy the moment , ripley’s admittedly a clever girl , simply needing the right push to unlock her truest potential .
she’s incredibly relaxed ( sometimes a bit too much for the preference of some ) and tends to try and avoid over - complicating issues in order to not have to face them . especially considering the infidelity of her mother , ripley is a staunch believer that relationships are a waste of time and is the annoying bitch who argues that being in love is a scam made up by the simps to feel valid !
acts as if she isn’t FULL of feelings and emotions 24/7 n listens to emo 70’s power ballads when the person she likes doesnt confess their love for her under the moonlight like they were supposed to in her fantasy ……. smh . she’s too busy trying to be ~cool and effortless~ that she sometimes sabotages the things that would bring her the most happiness , then blaming herself in a vicious cycle that just leaves her trying to distract herself w crazy antics to avoid focusing on her feelings .
RANDOM BLURBS : hates men n regrets all attraction to them . thinks all women r too good for her . convinced she will be a useless bisexual forced 2 be forever alone
plays guitar as a mental break from cello and loves it . i’m still deciding a vc for her
knows the beaches in maine are cold af but wants to go every weekend anyways
drives the most impractical soft shell jeep which sucks in the east coast wind and snow and yet it is somehow exactly an embodiment of Her Brand tm
like 5′9 tall and hates wearing real people shoes she said berks or nOTHIN
wishes she could go vegan but is so bad at keeping track of her meals she’d forget instantly and down a 20 pack of chicken nugget
too mellow & apathetic to be a chaotic neutral but too adventurous to be a true neutral so she lives somewhere in that lawless grey space skskskks
acts REAL california for someone who grew up exclusively on the east coast .... hm ..... 🤔
grew up disconnected from brazilian culture due to her mom's whitewashing and she resents it greatly . can understand scattered portuguese but took spanish in high school so that's as close to the language as she'll get . wants to take lessons online tho !
inspos r lila from umbrella academy , wynonna earp , beverly marsh from it , michelle manlon from derry girls , korra from lok , adora from she ra and the pop , and that ugly yellow overtone used in outer banks 💖 skskskks
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Literary Comfort Food
Guys, I have this crazy idea that we all might somehow want comfort reading right now for some reason. And maybe some recs wouldn’t go amiss. So here is some literary comfort food.
Circle of Magic series by Tamora Pierce Comfort food level: Chicken soup The classic found family standard to which all others will be held. There are 8 of them, they are short, they are easily approachable, and they are about people caring for each other. (There are more than 8 but I don’t count Melting Stones or Battle Magic or Will of the Empress or whatever else because, frankly, I don’t like them.) Why wouldn’t I read this: There are some bad things happening, and necessarily to children because the books are about children. Book 1 mentions a plague, and Briar’s first book is all about plague. And I think every book of the second quartet is about serial killers. But they all feel good, all the way through.
Murderbot series by Martha Wells Comfort food level: Frozen burrito. Fast, tasty, and there when you need it. Pew pew! Space battles! Wisecracking robot! I don’t really need to pay attention to anything, I’m just along for the ride! Why wouldn’t I read this: Technically Murderbot is clinically depressed and cynical and abused, but the 4 ebooks so far are, subtly, about how it has its cynical assumptions challenged and people are generally better than it has encountered. I was promised in-book introspection on why Murderbot prefers it/its pronouns, but if that was present I missed it as I read gleefully on to the next pronouncement about humans desperately trying to get themselves killed by not paying attention to Murderbot’s benevolent wisdom.
The Friendly Persuasion by Jessamyn West Comfort food level: Cornbread and fried okra. Everything is nice. Things are just calm and even and settled. This has been my go-to for ‘brain goblins need to calm down’ since before I called them brain goblins. Technically there is a battle in one of the stories, but uh. They kind of. The enemy never shows up and most of the ‘combat’ is someone panicking in the night and everyone else picking up on the panic, concluding with a brotherly discussion of the reasons why one might be compelled to fight, or compelled not to. Why wouldn’t I read this: They are necessarily slow books. If you need faster, lighter prose, they might not be for you.
Sarah Monette’s books in general Comfort food level: Butterbeer. Amaretto. Tequila. This stuff could potentially get you trashed, but it’s actually about things getting better and happier. Sarah Monette starts out with characters who have been abused horribly, and every book is the comfort part of a hurt/comfort book. There is occasionally additional trauma, but overall it’s just a whole heap of healing. If you’re worried about the trauma but want to give it a try, start with The Goblin Emperor - and then come back for warnings about the Doctrine of Labyrinths series because hoo boy. (They’re good, I swear! They make you feel generally happy about life and leave you wanting more! But terrible things do happen.) Why wouldn’t I read this: Terrible things happen! Usually pre-canon. Sometimes in the middle. Goblin Emperor involves emotional abuse and neglect of a child, with a single instance of physical abuse. I can read it cover to cover and go back to the beginning for more, which has literally never happened to me with any other book.
Elemental Logic series by Laurie Marks Comfort food level: Unicorn flavored ice cream But Nimbler, I hear you say, I am gay. I am so very gay and I need the world to be a better place. Well. Look no further. Why wouldn’t I read this: They’re pretty preachy, tbh. If you don’t want to be told about people needing to care for each other, try something else. Also, the first book starts with people being in a war and miserable, and things get worse for a while, until suddenly a few of the leads meet for lunch and everything just gets better from there. You gotta have a place to head up from, y’know?
Young Wizards series by Diane Duane Comfort food level: Box mac and cheese Nimbler, I want a little bit of science mixed into my feeling good. I like pew pew space battles! I like being told about the world being a better place and the people who make it so! I want a smidgen of philosophy worked into my comfort lit, though, you know? As just. An intro to the space battles, which are very important. Why wouldn’t I read this: I don’t like a little bit of science mixed into my comfort food. I really don’t like a little bit of philosophy. I just want to feel good, Nimbler. Leave me alone! Also: There is a minor character who dies of cancer, and you have to read A Wizard Alone by ebook or the coverage of autism is... outdated.
BUT NIMBLER I CAN’T GET NEW BOOKS I’m at home. I can’t go to a bookstore. I don’t want to welcome new objects into my home that come from... outside. And maybe I can’t afford to buy books right now. Well, lucky for you, Patrick writes exactly the fanfiction you need. And he taught me how to write it too. Patrick on AO3 - fandom is Shakespeare and/or early modern poets. Frequently in AUs. Living together and cuddling and making each other feel better about life. There’s a turkey at one point. And a puppy. Comfort food level: Kinder Surprise, there’s chocolate on the outside and a toy within! Nimblermortal on AO3 - a variety of fandoms. If you want comfort food, try Asafoetida and Mustard Seeds (Circle of Magic), Proud to Claim You (Circle of Magic - warning, plague violence dialed up in the second section), Oh Good He’s Nineteen (Elemental Logic), The Short Way’s Short but the Long Way’s Pretty (OF). Comfort food level: Spit. I mean, it’s me, what am I supposed to tell you? It tastes like the inside of my own mouth, dead neutral. #:-) If you want more, message me a way to send you files and I’ll drop you a copy of On Wrackspurts and Pumpkin Pie, my personal favorite comfort food fanfic, which is no longer on the internet. That I can find. I saved the thing to disk before it disappeared, but I didn’t save the author’s name :(. I used to be a Fecklessermortal, but I’m getting better. Comfort food level: Pumpkin pie, obviously.
Anyone else want to contribute?
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(Poster by Unknown, feel free to suggest the artist)
Lettuce thoughts about Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
There will be spoilers for the movie.
I watch Guardians of the Galaxy 2 a lot. It’s really a fantastic movie all in its own right, I’ve been a marvel fan all my life, this movie was really faithful to what I knew from the comics, but translated really well into a movie format that makes sense. There’s so much I love about it.
The soundtrack is wonderful. Most of the songs are bands I heard occasionally growing up and never really gave a second thought to, but being older when I saw this movie and how certain scenes were framed with their songs really stands out to me. Those moments are so powerful alone but now when I hear those songs, I have so many feelings lol.
The plot is really relatable to me in a lot of very personal ways. The main plot is about Peter Quill reacquainting with his real father, Ego the living Planet. Over the course of the movie this plot explores Peter’s complexes from growing up without a real father figure, and how the experiences he got weren’t what he dreamed they’d be. Like playing catch with his dad, in place of that he got Yandu teaching him to steal. In place of having a dad present in his life, he tells his friends growing up that his dad is an actor and away working.
I was raised almost exclusively by my mother. There were things my mom simply couldn’t teach me or do for me. I’ve spent a lot of time in therapy thinking about these things and how they affect my depression. I no longer speak to her, but I have come to the conclusion that did what she could up until the point where she’d throw her hands up and leave me to figure things out on my own. I sympathize with Peter Quill a lot because I also frequently feel lost and scared because I have no examples to draw experience from. I have no role models to look up to. It’s clear to me that a lot of Peter’s improving and attempts at humor and so on comes from that. Maybe if he can make someone laugh they won’t notice how bad he’s failing. Or he’s nervous, he tells the joke to get a laugh and get some minor distraction away from his fears. To break the tension.
Peter eventually realizing at the tail end of the story that he Has had a father this whole time. It wasn’t what he expected, but it checks the boxes. And in their own way, Yandu and Peter realized they had a familial relationship, father and son.
Later on in my life, my mother married a man who sold his house and all of his land, dropped his life to come up and take care of her and her children. I feel what he did for all of us in the 15 years he was married to my mother was damned near saintly. He never had biological children of his own and didn’t really know how to parent aside from what he learned from his parents. He worked himself to death to provide for us while my mother sat on her ass. (She was home maker in title only, she preferred to drink coffee and play games on her computer. The house fell into disrepair and while Tim worked 70 hour weeks for 15 years. He never laid a hand on any of us and loved my mother with every fiber of his being. He is a rare person.
Anyway, I don’t think we really had a close relationship until my mom left him. She chose to tell the extended family that he beat her and never wanted to have sex with her because he was cheating. It made me realize a lot of things about my mother as a person, and made me realize how much respect I have for Tim. My mom left him about six years ago and Tim and I have decided to continue our relationship as it was. He is the father I choose. Blood only has as much meaning as you want it to. I haven’t spoken to my mother since she left. We already had a tense relationship, her lying about this saintly man to her entire extended family was the final push I needed to cut communication with her.
I’m going to wrap this up. There are some other events in the movie that I identify with, but Peter’s arc really hits home with me. Watching this movie is borderline therapeutic for me. I realize I may be a little autistic about it, but I’m making peace with that. If you watch that movie after reading this, maybe you can appreciate it in a different light.
#guardians of the galaxy#rabbithole#movie#movie review#guardians of the galaxy 2#devils lettuce#ramble#personal#family issues
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