#as for the tumblrinas who are upset

[allpromarlo]

of course the football tumblrinas are upset about this super bowl matchup, both the qbs are black

[josephtrohman]

i preordered the damn where are your boys tonight book and i hate seeing people on my dash have it already while i’m still waiting. and it says it won’t be in for another week and a half at the earliest.

[dorizard-art]

This one physically hurt to draw but we can’t have 2012 posting with fandomstuck

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[Image ID: Image 1 shows the personifications of the Homestuck, Super-who-lock and Warrior Cats fandoms in the Homestuck art style. They are seated in a room with a ball pit in the background, and a sign that reads “2012 cringe fandom support group”. Dialogue follows. Homestuck: Where’s Onecler? Super-who-lock: Probably still upset about the sexy-man poll. Warrior Cats: tch, those twittypets don’t know anything! End dialogue. Image 2 shows a personification of tumblr kicking open the door, drawn like the Phineas and Ferb meme and yelling: “GUYS HOLY FUCK”. Image 3 shows tumblr pointing dramatically towards the camera, dialogue follows: The twitter users are coming so we have to make this place as inhospitable as possible. So grab your Tardises and your quadrants and your plinko horses, we’re firing shots to keep the rent down. Image 4 shows a close-up of the Warrior Cats fandom looking in awe. Dialogue follows: Warrior Cats: Oh can we call ourselves tumblr-clan? Tumblr: That’s... the best idea I’ve heard all goddamn day. Maximum cringe, tumblrinas! end ID]

[renegadeer]

ill explain specifically why bots conversation with cabby + the way its portrayed is harmful. evil twitter thread to tumblr blog conversion time first off, AE potrays bot messing with cabby by lying to her for laughs. i understand iii is a childrens media and it would be fine under most context, but since cabby has memory disabilities and connects her self worth to the accuracy of her files, playing it as a joke feels cruel. bot isnt doing it to be cruel! bot doesnt know about cabby’s memory disability, but the tone of the show plays it off as though but isnt doing anything wrong when they are. plus, cabby’s intent when asking bot info about themselves is to precent herself from saying more things that could upset them in the future (her insensitive comment abt bot being a replica). she isnt writing the files or asking for info out of malice, she’s trying to use her memory aids to prevent herself from hurting other’s feelings in the future.

bot lying to her just feels cruel and unnecessary, since cabby isn’t trying to use the information in a way that would hurt them. bot’s reasoning for distrusting cabby’s is pointless. cabby needs accurate info and facts because otherwise she physically cant remember anything. cabby doesnt share files willy nilly either, she has only ever shared contestant files with test tube for the sake of the competition, but that would be the same thing as someone who didn’t have a memory disability sharing what they can remember abt a contestant verbally

but bot doesn’t let cabby use her memory aid, which cabby agrees to. it would have made more sense if bot just told cabby to keep the file private, which im sure cabby would have! the reason she elimed fan was bc he took a file without asking first, invading her privacy!

and this is the most dangerous message to send to someone with a memory disability. becuase oftentimes manipulators will prevent them from recording things that are said to them to more easily gaslight them later. im not saying bot is trying to do this, they arent, but its still a bad message to tell people with memory issues to not keep personal record of “private conversations”. keeping these records is how mentally disabled and physically disabled people keep themselves safe! not everyone in the world is a good, genuine person!

i don’t understand why the message AE seems to be sending is that cabby’s disability aid is a bad thing! its not a bad thing to keep records! its a good thing, actually, for disabled people to protect themselves! and cabby isn’t in danger in ii, but its still an unsafe message to send to say she shouldn’t keep records to keep her facts straight. ae tries to justify this by implying that the people around cabby are there to support her; but she shouldnt be told to stop protecting herself because she should trust she’s safe

This scene is framed as a heartwarming moment when its the most unsafe thing someone could say to a disabled person. If someone prevents you from using an aid and tells to rely on them instead, thats a RED FLAG. this is a common way for abusers to increase your dependance on them

IM NOT SAYING BOT IS AN ABUSER. BUT FRAMING THIS POSITIVELY IS UNSAFE. say im reading too much into a childrens media but for SOME CHILDREN THIS MIGHT BE THEIR FIRST EXPOSURE TO ANOTHER CHARACTER W MEMORY ISSUES!

at the end of the episode cabby leaves her file behind. HER DISABILITY AID BEHIND. why Is That the Moral You Want. Disability aids are so disabled people can be more independant. why are you using your disabled character have the “be more open and vulnerable” arc?? disabled people are already one of the most vulnerable minorities! do not push this idea to stop them from protecting themselves!

okay sorry guys end of my evil ramble. um. smile emoji. for the tumblrinas

[shortpplfedup]

Only Friends Character Rankings Episode 6

Another outstanding episode as chickens start coming home to roost and Sand sets a ball a-rollin' that is gonna roll right over him in the end. In a surprise upset, Sand's mom won the audience vote last week, with Top and Boston tied for second place. You really never know who the Tumblrinas are going to favour from week to week, keeps us all on our toes! Here are this week's highly scientific rankings.

🔺1. Ray (4)

Let me talk to my friends. It’s his birthday. I’d like to say something.

Ray said NO SURVIVORS and sprayed the entire room at Mew's birthday party, and honestly? Kinda deserved. From calling Sand a whore (OUCH) to reading Cheum for filth for her shitty little backhanded comments, to almost letting the cat out of the Top/Boston bag in front of everybody, our resident mess came for every neck in the building. Boston primed him, Sand aimed him and Cheum lit the match, and it's no coincidence those three got hit with the blowback of his explosion at Top. A seething ball of pain and resentment fueled by alcohol and god-knows-what-else was never gonna fire a clean shot.

🔺2. Sand (5)

Stop thinking about Mew and focus on me for once. Can’t you really see that I care about you?

Well now we know why Sand didn't blink an eye at Nick bugging Boston's car; he's just as fucking unhinged. Sand, a poor, breaking his own phone just to get his hands on Nick's and that recording (which, by the way, calling the file 'That Car' is really too much Nicholas PLEASE 🤣)...WILD. We've all had Nick pegged as the bunny boiler but Sand might be worse and I can't WAIT because I still believe in that baseball bat. But him begging Ray to give a single solitary shit about him even AFTER Ray calls him a whore in front of a bar full of people...I remain embarrassed on his behalf.

🔺3. Mew (6)

Cocky much? I don’t even know if we’re gonna last that long.

Ok, when Mew said 'I love the sound you make when having sex' I literally screamed out OH FUCK HE KNOWS and listen, I have been WAITING for this moment. That was a baller fucking moment. You just KNOW Top's blood ran cold. Of course these two aren't breaking up, because couples like this NEVER break up. Game always recognises game. This is gonna be the first confrontation of many. But I'm pretty sure this is the last time Mew is gonna cry about it. Top might have just picked the wrong one. Mew has two moms, pretty sure he knows how to destroy a man.

🔻4. Nick (2)

I don’t give a shit about what number I am. Screw it. I’m not that into you.

At some point Nick is gonna have to stop threatening to walk and actually fucking walk, but it's clearly continuing to work for him as he and Boston are clearly the boyfriends Boston insists they're not. Dates, couple photos, meeting the dad, tender lovemaking, Boston's deep, dark secrets: Nick's getting it all...except the label he wants so very badly. And now he's shook because he knows Sand stole that recording, and he knows if Boston finds out about it it's all coming crashing down.

🔺5. Cheum (8)

I’m so happy everyone has a lover. Even a heartless slut like Boston has one.

Girl, you absolutely earned that smoke Ray blew at you. Sly Comment Susie got a minor taste of her own medicine and didn't like that shit one bit. It's all fun and games until it's your dirt under the microscope. Maybe Cheum just learned a lesson about minding her own business a little more, or at the very least keeping some of her thoughts to herself.

🔻6. Boston (3)

If I was a nice guy, you wouldn’t like me.

A surprisingly quiet week for Ton as everybody else gets so messy he looks relatively drama-free. But under the surface he's still paddling like mad: screwing Nick like a lover rather than just a fuckbuddy to keep him from leaving, clearly not out to his dad but bringing Nick round to meet him (once again using him for free work), pinning Ray so decisively that he causes a full-on meltdown. Though, 'I don't hate Mew'...well that might actually be true, because he's giving more fear than hatred.

🔻7. Top (1)

I get anyone I want. What about you? Who do you get?

Oh how the mighty have fallen. Top spent the episode feeling totally smug as he finally won the game and is basking in his spoils, swinging his dick around, feeling like King Shit. And then Mew played that recording and LOSER TIME. I have the distinct impression that Top hates to lose...

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for wanting a kid?

Yeah I know the titles a bit weird but I don't know how to explain.

[tw for mention of neglect]

I[X18] was talking in a groupchat earlier today(as of submission) that has my boyfriend[m17] friend1 [x16] and friend2[f17]. Myself my boyfriend and friend1 were sending memes in the groupchat and I had been sending my boyfriend reels on Instagram when he said "friend1 how do I deal with a crazy partner who wants a baby" which was joking and we just kinda ignored it and we went to class.

An hour or so later friend2 had started saying that it (having a baby) was a bad idea and that myself and my boyfriend weren't for to be parents(we're both seniors in highschool and planning on having 1 kid in our later 20's if we're still together) and said no one in the group should have kids.

I said that I want a kid and She said that if we had a kid they'd be malnourished, neglected, and would be taken away. And threatened to call cps if we had a kid. She also said she'd "abort that baby herself" Which felt excessive and really upset me. So I asked friend1 to basically drown the chat with memes and stuff and they sent like clown cat gifs and dancing cat gifs and then we just started a new conversation about characters we think are hot. And basically just ignored friend2

I know this is like really vague and Im probably not the asshole but like, I trust in the tumblrinas input

So aita?

What are these acronyms?

[thepoisonroom]

hello sorry if you've been asked this recently but could you recommend some good adult trans books 👉👈 no worries if you don't!!

there are lots of good ones and i've fallen out of the loop since i left my bookstore job! there's sometimes this attitude that trans writers can only be successful in some genres but there are great trans writers in lots of genres! so have tried to include a mix of genres here to highlight some of that abundance, and because i don't know what you like so want to include many things that i think might spark your curiosity.

i'm leaving a lot of classics off that i'm sure you've heard of or have been told to read, as well as some stuff i read that i didn't love and don't feel i can vouch for. there's also lots of good stuff for younger readers (have esp heard good things about sisters of dorley hall and when the angels left the old country) which is really heartening when i remember furtively reading the one trans novel for teens at my library when i was little! and i like that there are trans characters for younger readers now who don't have tragic endings. but anyway:

i really like anything by casey plett, particularly her novel little fish! i loved ivan coyote's rebent sinner for kind of autobiographical vignettes as well as gender failure which they wrote with rae spoon. gretchen felker-martin and alison rumfitt are big faves if you like horror, they're both so smart and unsparing. your body is not your body if you want a good taste of lots of different trans horror authors. the seep by chana porter for meditative sci-fi. the fifth wound by aurora mattia which is hard to describe but v gorgeous. paul takes the form of a mortal girl if you want something kind of carefree and horny and fun and not devastating or upsetting. summer fun by jeanne thornton if you've ever been like what if velvet goldmine were based on the beach boys. i like confessions of the fox by jordy rosenberg but i think the ideal audience for this book is like transmasc grad students who are horny in a neurotic way so it's not for everyone. stone fruit by lee lai was my favorite graphic novel of 2022 and it's a really beautiful examination of breakups and caring for children as a queer person and also forgiving your family. gaylord phoenix if you like your graphic novels weird.

books from my own to-read list that i've heard good things about from people i trust (have included author names only where the title alone isn't specific enough to find the right book):

wrath goddess sing (if you like mythology remixes)

a natural history of transition (magical realist short stories)

manywhere: stories (unsettling also magical realist short stories)

chromatic fantasy (graphic novel, trans guy nun has sex with the devil and has a romance with a robin hood-type trans guy bandit)

finna (gay trans multiverse travel in an IKEA)

X by davey davis (bdsm psychological thriller)

idlewild (transmasc fujoshi tumblrinas have a toxic bestieship)

girlfriends by emily zhou (slice of life short stories)

boys weekend (graphic novel, bachelorx weekend turns into a cult murder mystery)

the boy with the bird in his chest (magical realist coming of age)

the call-out (gossipy novel in verse)

nettleblack (victorian transmasc hijinks)

the story of silence (medieval n magical french trans hijinks based on the historical poem)

unfortunate elements of my anatomy (horror short stories)

bad girls by camila sosa villada (magical realist coming of age epic)

apsara engine (south asian graphic vignettes)

future feeling (funny bizarre sci-fi)

everyone on the moon is essential personnel (cyberpunk body horror weirdness)

[favcharacterpoll]

ROUND 5 MATCH 16: LINK VS. NICO

Link from BotW/TotK faces Nico di Angelo from the Riordanverse. Who do you like more?

Link Propaganda:

"i love this guy"

"I love him so much, okay? He's the only person capable of wielding the Master Sword, bears the Triforce of Courage, and was chosen by the goddess Hylia to protect Hyrule"

"Pretty boy"

"ok so link is like the best character ever imo cause have you seen what he looks like in totk he's so gender and ahhh and he's really cool and I love him so so much <333 and oot link is really cool and he's my whole childhood, and I love skyward sword and wind waker link cause they're so expressive, and I love twilight princess wolf link I just love all versions of link so much<3 only exception is the version from the philips cdi games he's so goofy" (focus on the totk part of this one)

"link is THE Gender Envy icon pretty boy pretty boy with sword!!"

Nico Propaganda:

"autism"

"YOU KNOW WHAT. if autism isn't enough to compel you to VOTE NICO then i will write this.

ok so he's gay & european (like the legally blonde song) and also a goth. we love our goths here on tumblr right?!

first i need to provide you a visual. please imagine a small italian boy. now imagine that small italian boy going through a time machine hotel casino in vegas, some wack crazy traumatic incidents, becoming an alt/emo kid and being so fucking powerful that even gods show a little more respect to him than others...

nico has gone through literal hell TWICE !! one time it was VOLUNTARY !! and all the while he was probably experiencing said hell in its most terrifying form. this shows us his mental resilience and selflessness are incredibly strong traits of his and that maybe he should stop being a reckless bitch but whatever !!!!!!

tumblrinas listen up... nico was the first canon lgbt+ character created by rick riordan in the chb chronicles (i am not counting all the other gods, goddesses, minor deities and other figures of greco-roman myth). he was the trailblazer. his story didn't end in tragedy, but he found friendship and love and family, which in this age of upsetting "bury your gays" media is still quite hopeful to read!!

nico has a sunshine bf who would literally walk through hell with him!! i'm not kidding. this actually happened. i'm sure he's definitely cheering from the sidelines somewhere... please do not let will solace down!!

did i mention nico's the son of hades, god of the underworld?? this means his powers include, but are not limited to, being able to communicate with spirits via mcdonalds happy meals, wielding a sword that rends souls asunder, turning people into ghosts, re-animating skeletons, shadow traveling and being able to read other people's death auras.

these powers and his terrifyingly grumpy personality (in earlier books) have created a reputation famous among the demigods and deities. also he literally summons an entire skeleton army and rises from the fucking underworld with his father, stepmother and step-grandmother (all gods) (how does this work) in tow, inspiring FEAR and PANIC among the enemy lines.

and if that's not enough, he's friends with lizard people, his signature items of clothing are a BIG AVIATOR JACKET + SKULL RING = VERY GOOD CHARACTER DESIGN and his hair canonically smells like rain on stone. just so you know

VOTE NICO VOTE NICO VOTE NICO !!!!!!!!!!!"

[max1461]

I read the whole Wikipedia article for Jeffrey Dahmer yesterday and (shocker) it was was kind of upsetting. I guess the main thing that I feel is that his actions were enabled by society? Both in the sense that most of his victims were part of the underground gay scene and thus easier to prey on—which is presumably how he got away with committing, literally, like one murder per month at the end without even seeming to try not to get caught—but also in the sense that like, you know, it seems like this guy had some amount of impulse control, and if "circumstances had been different" in some way I can't quite put my finger on, he might not have ended up doing all that?

Actually, when I read about serial killers I'm usually struck with the same thought, which is that like... some people find themselves with desires or personalities that don't comport with mainstream society. Sometimes (most times) this is harmless, but other times it has the potential to be harmful. I mean, uh, no offense, but this website is full of strange people with outlooks that mainstream society regards as somewhat freakish. But I don't think the difference between tumblrinas and Jeffrey Dahmer (oof, ok, but bear with me) is solely that he got worse moral luck of the draw in being born with more aberrant and harmful desires.

I think there's something about like, situatedness? Like finding your place. If your nature is such that you can't be a normie, you can either deal with that—come to clear conclusions about the relationship between normalcy, morality, and you; determine your own sense of right and wrong—or you can just not, you can go "guess I'm a freak, so I'll do whatever". And taking the former path is easier when you have a community who you do comport with, who can offer you a positive vision of life-as-a-weirdo.

I guess that's what I'm getting at. Look, I'm not saying that any specific killers would have been otherwise if circumstances had been different, I don't know. But it does seem like some of them had the capacity to be different, the cognitive tools (impulse control, some sense of morality, etc.), but they were never in a position to exercise this capacity because they never at any point found themselves in a place in life where there was a positive vision of how to be a person as themselves. Their only existing options were "repressed" or "debauched", and so they chose debauched.

I don't know, maybe I'm totally barking up the wrong tree.

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

So are you writing for Jude or not

Omg listen y'all keep coming to my inbox asking this and I'm going to just say what I think. Is he stupid for posting that story with a heart knowing it said that place that shouldn't be named on it? Absolutely !! he is but at the same time it also said a moment of silence for those people who got shot at a game the day or two before. Is it upsetting absolutely but I don't think his story was even intended for that purpose hence why I don't think that shows his views on that situation. I don't think he supports those war criminals seeing how his dad feels about it(and Tory members but I'm not British so leave me out of it if i didn't get it right) on Twitter. He's not his dad of course he's definitely close enough to that man to share the same views. I'm not trying to kiss this man's ass(still think he was fucking dumb for not thinking before posting) and you can unfollow me on this but I think really the uefa needs to be called out for their stupidity of "politics has no place in sports" while actively making people who speak out on the issue sit to the sideline for no supporting baby killers

So now if you'll leave me alone and let me live my Tumblrina life that's be nice

[ed-recoverry]

I came across two tiktoks where girls, one was 13 and under and the other 15 or under, could ask questions and girls 14 or older/16 or older could answer. I noticed a lot of repeated questions, so I wanted to make my own answers to any younger tumblrinas

Some of the questions reference periods and boobies, so wanted to add that ofc it’s not just girls that have those, but just in the context of the tiktok :)

Is middle school / high school bad?

Everyone has a different experience. Some easier, some harder, some mixed. One this guaranteed though is that it will end.

Should I change myself for a boy/girl/friend?

Never! Be yourself and the right friend/partner will find you.

Why do I feel alone?

I promise you aren’t, even though it feels so. I know there’s not much I can say to convince you, but please consider that I guarantee, without a doubt, you won’t always feel this alone.

How do I make myself pretty?

Stay healthy, get enough nutrition, move around, and the beauty will follow. I know you don’t believe me, but your body is going to change so much between now and adulthood. Giving yourself the proper care is how to make sure you blossom into a beautiful person. Beauty isn’t skin, or weight, deep. I know that especially is hard to believe and I know I can’t convince you, but I hope you believe me when I say one day you will agree.

Why do I feel like everyone hates me?

I promise not everyone does. It’s possible some of the people surrounding you aren’t best for your self esteem and you should consider who lifts you up and who brings you down.

Why does everyone leave me?

It’s not the people who leave that you have to focus on, but the people who stay. Work on surrounding yourself with those sticking with you. Those leaving weren’t meant to be there. Also consider if you play a role in driving people away. If you can maybe help, or maybe if it just isn’t meant to be.

I feel like no one loves me.

You are loved.

I’m scared to get my first period.

There’s nothing to be scared of. Dreading the annoyance, maybe. But it’s a normal bodily function billions of people have/had.

I miss him/her/them / I can’t get over him/her/them.

It’s beyond normal to be upset over a breakup. Spend time grieving and crying it out, but don’t let it break you. You will find someone else. Life is so long. Not to mention there’s so much more to life than relationships.

Is it okay to starve myself / cut myself / burn myself?

No. Please seek help ASAP.

I feel like I’m not enough.

You are.

Will I ever be happy again?

Yes. I can’t promise soon, but I can promise it will.

Advice for period cramps?

Painkillers on standby. I prefer Midol, but any generic aspirin or whatever will work. Heating pads on your stomach or back. Baths and warm drinks. Look up yoga poses and foods to help and avoid.

Is it okay to be single?

As previously stated, life is painfully long. Plus there is so much more to life than relationships. Yes, it’s okay to be single. But don’t let that make you feel like less than or that you’re missing out. Life is long. You have time.

Is it okay to have hip dips?

That’s literally a symptom of having a bone structure. Especially if you’re AFAB, those are your hips. It doesn’t mean anything good or bad.

Is it okay to be confused about your sexuality / gender?

Yes! There’s no rush! Explore what you like. There’s no limit on self discovery.

Does it get better?

Eventually. I can’t promise soon, but I can promise eventually.

I just feel like things keep getting worse mentally.

Personally, I got worse before I got better. It’s normal, and sometimes necessary. Hang in there. I promise one day it will be okay.

Is it possible for heterosexual girls and heterosexual guys to be friends?

Absolutely.

Will I ever find love?

Yes, if that’s what you want. But, once again, please no that’s not the only thing that matters.

My emotions feel overwhelming / uncontrollable?

This is a situation that could be normal or abnormal, and it’s a bit hard to tell (sorry). Teenage hormones suck, bouncing back and forth, sometimes not waiting for your head to catch up with your heart. But if it’s to the point where you can’t take it or it’s consistently interfering with your productivity, that may be a point where you want to seek help.

Do things get better after middle / high school?

Usually, yes. A lot of what used to be so important, people couldn’t care less about. More deep seated issues may need more intense addressing, but all of those tiny things you constantly picked at yourself for likely will disappear.

Is middle / high school fun?

Yes, but you have to figure out what is fun for you. For me, partying wasn’t fun, small hangouts with my friends were fun.

What if he/she/they don’t like me back?

Then it wasn’t meant to be. Take time to be upset about it, but don’t let it define you.

Is it okay to hold in / ignore your emotions?

Depends. It is appropriate for a short period of time in which emotions may get in the way of a task. But it shouldn’t be something you always do.

Why do I feel unloved even when I know I am loved?

Cause you’re insecure and don’t see how much value you have in this world. Strive for the day in which you realize this.

Why do I feel alone when friends are all around me?

^^^

Would short / long hair look good on me?

Who cares? It’s hair. It will grow back.

Why don’t I have boobs?

Your body doesn’t really stop moving around until you’re 20-ish. You have time. That said, boobies don’t equal worth. That all said, you are worth way more than boobies.

Sex?

Only when you are 110% sure and ready. Please educate yourself as much as possible about it, preferably with a trusted adult. If one of you has a penis and the other a vagina, ALWAYS USE CONDOMS. No means no. The absence of a yes means no. “I’m not sure” means no. “I’m not in the mood” or “I don’t feel like it” means no. “I’m not comfortable with ___,” means don’t do that. Pee after sex if you were penetrated. Check in with your partner. Clean any sex toys. USE A CONDOM! CONSENT IS MANDATORY!

I want to kill myself.

Please reach out for help ASAP.

I am hurting myself / I want to hurt myself.

Please reach out for help ASAP.

I am starving myself / purging to lose weight.

Please reach out for help ASAP.

I am being hit / touched inappropriately at home.

Please reach out for help ASAP.

I want to hurt people, often or always unprompted.

Please reach out for help ASAP.

[jellybeanium124]

I'm mad again. and honestly this post is me being an asshole and deeply upset about it because I'm not a good little jew

another mutual gone just proving my theory all of you goyim have a ticking clock in you until you can't handle this little jew ruining your perfect story of the heroic wonderful amazing revolutionary group called hamas who are going to free palestine from the evil nazi demons called the jews zionists who deserved to be raped and dunked in a volcano. I hope you feel guilty when you block me. I hope a part of you knows that you did it because you can't actually listen to minorities when it's the teeniest bit challenging to your worldview. I hope part of you knows you're being an antisemite. and I hope that guilt eats at you and eats at you until you die peacefully at the age of 100.

it was river himbohargreeves btw I don't even fuckin care anymore to vagueblog about who's doing it. funny enough our last two convos were 1) them reaching out to me to ask for advice on avoiding antisemitic tropes in their book about aliens secretly taking over the world, and 2) me reaching out to them after they reblogged a post that was like "the ofmd renewal campaign is stupid donate to hamas instead" where I was like "hey man you can think the renewal campaign is stupid but please don't reblog posts about how you should support hamas from a person who is a 100% dead serious hamas supporter because that's super antisemitic." and they apologized and agreed that was fucked up of them. guess they were lying the whole time! I hope river and hamas are very happy together. I wish I was seeing you thirstblog about diego and his stupid dad look rn but the occasional i/p post from your friend of three years was too much for you to take!

I don't want to lose any of you.

I have blocked TWO former friends, one who immediately said disgusting antisemitic shit on one of my posts a day or two after oct 7, and one who reblogged super antisemitic shit a few weeks later (after unfollowing me already so we were no longer mutuals). everyone else has been them deciding to end our friendship. everyone else has been them deciding the opinions of a jew are something that is too difficult for them to hear. everyone else has been them saying "I can't take this fuckin' kike anymore," never me saying "I can't handle this person's opinions on i/p anymore" because my bar is straight up on the floor. it's below the floor. my bar has descended below the ground straight through to china and is continuing to plummet through space to this day.

all you goyim have no idea what it this has been like, slowly watching every single person leave you because of, ultimately, who you are. because they can't handle the average jew's opinion. because mine is the average jew's opinion, at least the average tumblrina jew. I feel 100% comfortable saying that. I'm actually less "pro israel" or whatever the fuck than some people, and I've seen a lot of posts I'd reblog if it weren't for a sentence or two I really disagreed with.

none of you understand how this has foundationally impacted my ability to trust goyim. irl I'm "in the closet" as a jew for the first time. I meet new people now I keep fucking shtum and any stories that involve my judaism in some way are bent and edited to erase it. I went to jewish camp. I took a jewish choir trip. I'm actually jewish eastern european.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm not a good jew. I'm sorry I'm not parroting the party line. I'm sorry I'm not reblogging 15 "free palestine" posts per day. I'm sorry I haven't denounced my people or our right to self-determination. I'm sorry I keep talking about it even though I shouldn't. I'm sorry I think hamas is evil. I'm sorry I think israel should get to exist. I'm sorry I don't say bibi is evil enough. I'm sorry I said you don't get to be antisemitic towards jews you don't like no matter how evil they are. I'm sorry I don't condemn the IDF's actions enough. I'm sorry I didn't share the AI "All Eyes On Rafah" image. I'm sorry I keep reminding you "from the river to the sea" is antisemitic. I'm sorry I'm not a good jew. I'm sorry I'm not a good jew. I'm sorry I'm not a good jew. I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!!

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

how can I grovel enough for you? can I be a good little jew? one who doesn't upset the goyim? one who has friends? how many of you haven't blocked me yet because even though you want to it'd be a bit awkward? maybe we're in a discord server. or just talk enough that suddenly getting blocked would make things weird. just make friend groups a bit tense and uncomfortable.

I wish I could be a good jew for you and earn your goyische love but I can't. I'm a rat bastard kike who thinks israel should continue to exist. shove me in an oven about it.

[meatcute]

white tumblrinas are so pathetic man. you act like bisan is personally holding a gun to your head and telling you to starve when she asks the world "please pay attention to whats happening to us, stop being distracted by frivolous things and pay attention to us for one measly week." of course its upsetting and theres not a lot that one individual can do. its still up to you to do what you can, so that cumulatively everyones efforts are noticed. dont be that guy who doesnt participate bc "its too demanding"

[strawberry-muffin-crisis]

allow me to complain for a moment my good tumblrinas

(tl;dr op is whining about her knees and needing people to help her over her silliness)

Am I the only one who gets really frustrated and upset with fitness programs that call themselves "beginner-friendly" and then immediately tell you to start doing things like STABILIZATION PUSHUPS?? like my brother in Christ, my arms are weaker than Joe Biden's mind right now dude. "Try negative pushups instead" I literally cannot. "Have you tried doing it from your knees" yes, can barely manage it. "What about a raised surface" already tried it, can't do it. "have you tried leaning against a wa--" YES AND I CAN'T DO IT. I do one thing and my elbows start crackling like a jammed printer. Can't do lunges either-- I must've messed them up in the last fitness program I was in. I managed to do like six lunges today before I literally almost fell over because of my knee pain.

I WANT to do healthy things. I WANT to be able to work out but I think I ran out of literal elbow grease because these joints SHOULD NOT BE DOING THAT. I don't need a "beginner-friendly" program, I need a "weak little baby noodle arms wet cat-friendly" program because these people don't undersTAAAAAND AUGH!! my KNEES!!! MY LEG!!!!! im literally the fish from Spongebob!

I am WEAK!!!!! and I'm not ashamed to say it, because it's my current situation and I can't pretend like it's not. I DO want to change it and darn it if I'm not trying my best. But??? Everything in the fitness world seems so unapproachable sometimes 😭

[residentevil-4]

sorry this drama is still making me insane i mean neurodivergent. some developments regarding the nursery nurse drama... ( it's gonna be a long one again )

the response video was uploaded sometime around 09/28, since i made that post within a day or so of it being posted; she had deleted the video sometime in the following days, but it has been reuploaded here - we'll get into the account that reuploaded it later.

i. making fun of "bedrotting"

so, charlotte ended up deleting the video and turning off comments because a lot of people didnt appreciate the bedrotting comment:

autumn: it would seem this hate train really did summon the cave dwellers from their bed rot marjorie: most likely lying in sheets that havent been washed in months

a lot of people are saying this bedrotting comment is ableist because, on tiktok at least, bedrotting is that thing you do when youre too depressed to get up and you just lay in bed all day and get all gross and stuff because you dont practice basic hygiene. we've all experienced it, we're depressed tumblrinas here.

i think its fairly obvious that she meant it as a play on the "basement-dwelling troll" type of insult and not a "my haters are all depressed losers" insult, but either way, i suppose i can understand the arguments people have made about it being ableist. i disagree and think people are doing typical tiktok over-moralizing, especially since "bedrot" is a laymans description of the depressive symptom, but i understand. especially the bits about her being kind of a hypocrite for discussing things like depression and the like while making fun of depression symptoms.

the "bedrot" insult became so infamous that a copypasta has been adapted to memeify the situation. the copypasta is seen in at least one comment on every video discussing the situation.

i believe it is actually a double reference, first to some meme about the game papa louie's freezeria ( memeified into "papa louie's freakeria" or sometimes just "papa freak" with the fancy cursive text to imply it's being said in a sexual tone ), but then a different tiktoker called "Mama Owl" who would make skits regarding situations in school settings and after she acted out a trans child being sexually assaulted in... surprisingly graphic detail, people started doing the fancy text and mocking something she had said.

...so now this has extended to people doing this with random weird quotes that charlotte has said:

in addition, the account that reuploaded her response video is nurserynursebedrotslvt and seems perhaps... unhealthily obsessed with that comment. they have since made 27 videos about charlotte in general, with one video having been uploaded ~4 hours ago, but the bedrot comment seems the most popular. nearly every single video they upload has the tags #thenurserynurse, #thenurseryverse, #bedrot, #bedrotting.

they are not the only account to have said anything, though. other people also posted about the "bedrot" controversy.

many people are debating if the complaints are even valid or not, or what the exact definition of "bedrot" even is.

most of the comments criticizing her are people saying its a medical term ( it is not ) or relating it to their own definitions of bedrotting, like them having depression or in this case, chronic fatigue. which feels very... "bean soup", to relate it to another tiktok thing.

some commenters defend her, though:

all in all it seems like something very controversial and no one is going to really get over it. a lot of people are upset less at the insult itself but more about the fact that she turned off comments and has not addressed the criticism regarding the comment. ( though a lot of people are actually mad at the insult because they're taking it very personally, or getting upset on behalf of others. )

personally i don't really see why they expect her to respond. despite the parasocial relationship many of her fans have developed with her, she doesn't seem to actually feed into it by speaking directly to the audience. people have formed that bond all on their own. she doesn't actively respond to any fans in general, especially not recently, and all of her uploads are the skits/story - even her advertisements for brand deals and the like are entirely acted out skits.

moreover, it seems like people are simply taking the situation far too personally. she was telling the people who hate her videos to touch grass because they're stinking up their room; she was not making a coded dig at people who are too depressed to leave.

in summation for this leg of the journey:

ii. something strange about d.i.d.

apparently some other shit has gone down as well? i'm not "in the fandom", i watch the videos, so i don't know where patient zero of this... weird shit is.

i'm thinking it's this account, "marjorienie".

one of their videos goes over their nursery nurse "alters", listing their name, pronouns, and a short description of them. it's basically just the characters in the show.

alternatively, it may be this person's account. they admitted to making the account as a joke.

so apparently this is a common thing? once again, i don't foresee charlotte making any sort of response to this situation either. it's a very small situation & she doesn't respond to much anyway.

iii. the event in october

i hadn't actually heard about this one outside of the comment she made in her ( now deleted ) response video, but someone called "mikeymixtv" had made a video discussing the "event" in october. he originally made some video saying the NurseryVerse song is bad and that the fandom is weird, but he made this video in response to one of the comments:

mikey says he is an event organizer and he's done research on the event. he says that the prices are odd since general admission is £44 and tickets can get as high as £120 - now, he usually organizes for drag shows and they are at most £10.50 ( with things like DragCon being more expensive ) but that usually also involves meeting the queen; he's seen a lot of the videos of past events and apparently it's literally just a cardboard cutout, so what are they paying all that money for?

he says he loves that she's getting her bag, good for her, but it's gotten out of hand. it's far too high, nearly extortionate, for such a nothing reward.

some comments on the matter:

it is worth noting, though, that apparently it is a costly event space & that she doesn't set the prices herself - her management company does... however, we don't know if she tried to negotiate the prices to be lower, so she can still be criticized for this. if enough people make a stink about pricing the next event could be more reasonably priced.

i'm no event organizer and i am 100% willing to be critical, so i'll go ahead and fill in the details that he only skims over, since his video is two minutes! (the event website is here)

the website is localized to american dollars on my laptop, so sorry for the currency change lol. the superfluous details will be ignored

apprentice: $62.78, plus a $6.28 service charge you get a never-before-seen episode, live performances (somehow? its a one-woman show so i would be astonished to see that), art instillations, and DJ sets

room leader: $84.19, plus a $8.42 service charge everything from the first one, plus free drinks (bottomless sodas) and an exclusive collectors cup

senior staff member: $92.75, plus a $9.28 service charge everything from the first two, plus some Spud Bros food

management: $141.27, plus a $14.13 service charge everything from the first three, plus access to the VIP lounge.

board of directors: $184.07, plus a $18.41 service charge everything from the first four, plus free limited edition merch. "and more".

obviously these prices are INSANE - i mean neurodivergent - even with the exchange rate, so i think it's crazy that anyone would actually go to see a tiktoker for this. if anything is worth criticizing her for, it's these high ass prices. idgaf about the fake bedrotting controversy!!!!!!!

i'm also very confused as to where this "charity" is and how much of the profits are going to it. she says the song and the event are for an anti-bullying charity while also saying she's bragging about the money, so... hmm... much to think about!

[c0rpseductor]

i think one of the really frustrating parts about my ocd is like

i have the lying by omission or being accidentally misleading fear a LOT (esp as it relates to disclosing my abuse history) and also the same compulsion to seek reassurance as like anybody with ocd, but i also have this terrible thing where i recognize that my thoughts are unhelpful and illogical but get convinced that if i talked about them people would be mad at me.

like if i mentioned as an example "donation posts are bad for my ocd bc i feel morally obligated to reblog them and experience serious anxiety and discomfort until i do, and if they have any guilt-inducing language it compounds the effect" then my fear ends up that people would respond like "well it IS your obligation and you are being a bad person by making it all about you and comforting you in your privilege." basically like worrying that actually my ocd IS reasonable and those standards ARE objective and people WILL be mad if i try to work on it.

and ofc that also makes it really hard when i DO say or do something wrong related to my ocd, bc then i will have weird anxiety about it for ages but not be able to tell anybody or ask for help managing it down to reasonable levels of guilt bc then i'll feel like that's "making it about myself" and that actually the guilt is the only thing tethering me to acceptable behavior and so on. and usually the thing i've done wrong is small, so it's like, i feel ridiculous for being upset about being Evil Forever And Needing To Always Atone And Watch My Behavior over basically nothing. and then that ALSO makes me feel like i'm making it about myself and need to be watched and disciplined EVEN MORE. so even the smallest thing i do wrong can send me into like ages of self-policing and "you are so [insert bigotry here] and if you don't [list of compulsions] you will be irredeemably awful. [list of compulsions] is the only way to make up for what you've done. reaching out for help just means you don't want to accept the necessary discomfort that comes from being good and care more about your personal comfort than what is morally correct."

And this is just how i live my life every day and i have to try to just deal with that without having insane incredibly visible meltdowns which is always literally all my brain wants me to do bc part of me will hope people see that and Absolve me of my usually imagined wrongdoing. but this emotional reaction also counts as Bad (see above).

idk why im really going into all this beyond that i wish more people understood what moral ocd is like and how it manifests and that people who have it are not just like, chronically online or whatever. ive had my ocd symptoms made fun of as me being like, too much of a tumblrina goodie two shoes who needs to lighten up before, and it's really frustrating. like believe it or not i KNOW most of this makes no goddamn sense, but i have a mental illness that causes anxious obsessive spirals and compulsive behavior to mitigate that crushing anxiety, so outside of ERP or medication i cannot in fact Just Chill. like it's not a personality flaw of too much prudishness OR being too self-concerned and fragile to do The Work of unlearning bias (attitude i have also seen about ocd symptoms). it's a fucking disability