#arch-arsonist

[monstersdownthepath]

A thought, but can the gods show up in-person on Golarion as long as they don't 'do' anything? I know that the general provision is that they don't show up for some very good reasons, but that's generally concerning actually 'doing' stuff like Iomedae going to the Worldwound to take charge in-person. Say Cayden Cailean wants to visit an old bar owned by an elf that he really liked as a mortal. Could he just surreptitiously snoop on down for an evening and see what's up? Not go on a tear against Asmodeus's places of worship or anything, just a quick little bar visit and maybe chat?

------

While an actual deity traveling to the planet is rare, demigods walk the world in disguise all the time. The key here being in disguise.

There is no doubt in my mind that the gods themselves have come down to Golarion multiple times, but they're not supposed to, so they have to do it secretly, or only under extremely specific circumstances. The unspoken divine accord between all deities has an effect similar to a cold war, in which anyone who gets caught making a move invites retaliation from their opposition, no matter how great or small the action is.

If you saw your ideological and political enemy strutting around in the open, you likely wouldn't even have time to wonder what they're doing there and if they were armed before the alarm bells in your head drowned out all rational thought. Thus, again, if a god wants to visit the world, they have to do it quietly, or they have to do it in a way that basically grants them limited diplomatic immunity, such as having a miracle invoked by mortal worshipers or appearing in a location of divine significance to them and not leaving that location. Even the aforementioned demigods have to be careful despite how often they travel (relatively), because if their enemies find out they're out and about, that gives those foes precious information. Where they are, but more importantly: where they're not.

I doubt there's a tavern on the planet Cayden hasn't visited in person at least once, though. He'll have to be quick about disappearing before he's found out!

[cc-tinslebee]

currently experiencing JJK and Brooklyn 99 brainrot at the same so

JJK B99 au time baby

Welcome to the 66th precinct!

Gojo is the police precinct’s captain, and Nanami is the Sergeant overseeing them. They went to the police academy together :3

Shoko and Suguru also went to the academy with them. Shoko eventually decided she didn’t want to peruse it, and cheated her way through medical school. She’s a doctor at a nearby hospital. Suguru… they don’t like to talk about.

Yuji’s the Jake Peralta type, golden retriever, wanted to be a cop because of action movies, comes up with elaborate personas when he goes undercover

Megumi and Maki are both kinda Rosa Diaz. Steely badasses who have hidden soft spots that are volatile when touched

Nobara’s DEFINITELY Gina if she were a cop, judgmental and opinionated, but easily controls the room. She manages (bullies) other sectors

Yuuta and Maki as Jake and Amy <33 Maki makes up petty little competitions with him and he couldn’t be more in love (DETECTIVE MAKI OKKOTSU EVERYONE)

Panda 100% pulls a Charles Boyle and has a ten year matchmaking plan that pre-dates Yuuta joining the precinct by like. three years

Toge’s def still the precinct prankster, and always develops elaborate covers with Yuji :3

dunno where Kirara and Hakari are but they’re definitely floating around somewhere

(the idea of the Kyoto students being a different precinct is good but hear me out: they’re firefighters that they constantly beef with)

Junpei as Doug Judy‼️ except he’s a troubled young adult who keeps on crossing paths with Detective Yuji Itadori, who simultaneously tries to befriend Junpei while insisting that he’s his arch-nemesis

Choso as Pimento where he was undercover for so long that he low-key forgot how to be a normal person/detective

Jogo as a prolific serial arsonist, that is all

Mahito and Kenjaku are the worst of the criminals they’ve dealt with. Both prolific serial killers who enjoy maiming people a la Silence of the Lambs

Kenjaku is still Choso and Yuji’s mom/dad, and is a deadbeat with a bunch of kids all over like Papa Peralta

[stabbyfoxandrew]

ohh i missed last week and almost forgot it was wednesday😦 Could i have some arsonist neil🙏

WIP Wednesday (5/22)| Arsonist Neil / Firefighter Andrew AU (Part 177)

Andrew is almost done with his brownie mess by the time his phone goes off again. He scrapes the bowl and licks his spoon clean before shoving the bowl onto the coffee table. Then he picks up his phone and all the air leaves his lungs. Breathtaking, he thinks. Literally breathtaking. 

The only time Andrew ever met 10 in the daylight, he’d had his hood up. With light on his eyes, they’re even brighter. Somehow even bluer. The scars are a bit better and a bit worse than Andrew has been remembering them, deeper maybe. But they don’t really take away from his cheekbones and jawline, they’re just... embellishments. 

Andrew zooms in for a moment, trying to determine how the scar under his eye got there. He’s never asked about 10’s scars before. Mainly because if someone asked Andrew about his own he’d cut their tongue out. Plus, it’s goddamn rude. Andrew zooms back out to the full photo and begins analyzing everything about it.

From this photo alone, Andrew can tell 10 doesn’t take many photos of himself. From the awkward smile on his face to the deer-in-headlights look in his eyes, which has been there every time they’ve met face to face, to the rigid way he’s standing straight as a rod. Andrew could send the idiot a compliment, but he doesn’t think 10 needs one. 

Andrew You didn’t have to send me a mugshot. A casual photo would have sufficed. 10 Fuck you. I did my best. Where’s yours?

Andrew takes a quick selfie and inspects it, making sure he looks alright. As he checks it over he notes that he looks sort of different. He’s not sure why that is until he realizes he’s used to seeing his brother’s piercing-less face. And the circles under his eyes are lighter than usual. How nice.

After he sends the picture, he goes to set his bowl in the sink and comes back. Before he sits down, he peers out the window to see that the rain has stopped. And that there’s a rainbow arching over the building next door. It’s sort of faint, but it still counts. So he snaps a picture of it and goes to send it to Renee. But his finger slips and he forwards it to 10 instead. 

“Oops.” Andrew hits undo but it’s too late. So he just shrugs and selects Renee’s name to send it to her as well.

[hypernova-writes]

KinkTober Day 12

[Sensory Play - Pyro]

[Pyro noticed you were stressed, so they wanted to help you relax]

“So…let me get this straight Py..” You say as you allowed the arsonist to place a blind fold over your eyes, you only were wearing a robe and the two of your were in your room.

“This wax..you’re about to pour on me..it going to feel nice?..”

Pyro hums in response, they made sure your eyes were covered. You feel them tap you in your side, signaling for you to get up on your bed. They lay you back on your bed as they slowly pulls your robe open.

Pyro happily makes a sound you couldn't tell, but you could suddenly feel their hands caressed your body, massaging your breasts and trailing down your body with some type of oil down your body.

You gasp as Pyro ran a flame across your body, seemingly just to get you adjusted to this.

You then hear them make a noise of confirmation. You responded with a small nod.

Pyro grabbed the warm candle wax before gently pouring it across your stomach with one hand, while their other trailed down to your cunt. You gasp as the hot wax hits your body, you whimper put as Pyro decides that's the perfect time to slip their gloves fingers in.

You were bound, at your Lovers mercy as they tease your body with the warm wax, pulling it off before pouring fresh wax onto you, it seemed like they were drawing a heart on your stomach as they pumped their fingers in.

You arched your back, feeling them curl their fingers that had your vision going blurry and you could’ve sworn you were seeing stars. “O-oh fuck..baby..n-Ngh..” You stuttered out as you squirmed underneath them. You could hear them make a soft sound that you assumed was a groan or a moan as they picked up the speed. You whined as you bucked your hips, you squirm and toss, the warm oil and wax on your skin only raising your pleasure to a point you’d never imagined.

“P-Pyro! I-i..” You couldn’t even get your words together as you came crashing down from your high, They caress your thighs as they remove their fingers.

You giggle breathlessly as they pull their blindfold from your face before nuzzling their face mask against your face. “Mhm..I-I’m okay Pyro..”

You watch them as they decide to peel the wax from your body, making sure to be careful. They then pull a warm blanket out for you, covering you with it. The made a motion, that you knew meant. “Rest please! I’ll be right back.”

You give your lover a kiss against their mask, and you could hear the giddy sound they let out before they head out the room, probably going to get more stuff to help you relax and stuffed animals so that you could cuddle and go to bed together.

[omegaremix]

Omega Radio for July 19 & July 20, 2014; #56.

Wu-Tang Clan “Can It Be So Simple”

Public Enemy “Tie Goes To The Runner”

A Tribe Called Quest “Lyrics To Go”

Wu-Tang Clan “Da Mystery Of Chessboxing”

Black Moon “Crooklyn”

Gang Starr “Take It Personal”

Organized Konfusion f. O.C. “You Won’t Go Far”

Boogiemonsters “R.T.N.S. (Recognized Thresholds Of Negative Stress)”

Bushwackass “Ruff, Rugged, And Raw”

Jeru Tha Damaja “Mental Stamina”

AZ “Rather Unique”

Notorious B.I.G. “Unbelievable”

Group Home “Suspended In Time”

Funkdoobiest “Doobie In The Head”

Q-Ball & Kurt Kazal “Makin’ Moves (Bass Radio VER)”

Smooth Da Hustler “Broken Language”

Mic Geronimo “Shit’s Real”

Half A Mil “Another Homicide Scene”

Kool Keith (as Dr. Octagon) “Blue Flowers”

All City “Move On You” (RMX)

Reflection Eternal f. Gil-Scott Heron “The Blast”

Big L “Holdin’ It Down”

GZA f. DJ Muggs “When The Fat Lady Sings”

Bad Seed “For The Kids”

Deltron 3030 “Virus”

Hieroglyphics “Oakland Blackouts”

Smut Peddlers “One By One” (demo)

Kool G Rap & RZA “Cakes”

Slum Villlage “Raise It Up”

KRS-One “Underground”

Nas f. Large Professor “Stay Chiseled”

Peanut Butter Wolf “Dopestyle”

Company Flow “8 Steps To Perfection”

Yak Ballz “Nasty Or Nice”

Arsonists “Flashback”

Chi-N.Y. Network “Keep The Fame”

Dalek “Trampled Brethen”

Rubberoom “Evil Arch Angels”

Murs “H-U-S-T-L-E”

Company Flow “Collude / Interlude”

Cannibal Ox f. Vast Aire “Atom”

Smut Peddlers “Smut Control”

MF Grimm f. Kool G Rap & Akinyele “AIDS”

Cage f. Jello Biafra “Grand Ol’ Party Crash”

King Gheedorah “Take Me To Your Leader (Fazers)”

Madlib as Quasimoto “Return Of The Loop Digga”

MF Grimm f. MF Doom “Foolish”

Vast Aire “Cholesterol”

Madvillain “America’s Most Blunted”

MF Doom & MF Grimm “Tick Tock pt. 2”

King Gheedorah “G-Force pt. 2”

Molemen “Put Your Quarter Up”

R.A. The Rugged Man “On The Block”

CX Kidtronik “Wild Kingdom”

Jonwayne “404 Garbage”

Matches Malone / PIllsbury “It’s Like That”

Tragedy Khadafi “Best Of Both Worlds”

Diverse “Ain’t Right” (DJ Mitsu RMX)

Immortal Technique “Harlem Streets”

Tech N9ne “Who Do I Catch”

Action Bronson “Savage From Sarasota”

Jonwayne “The Come Up”

Skeme Team & Brooklyn Academy “Con Artists”

Serengeti “Directions”

DC The Midi Alien f. Vinnie Paz “Man-Made Ways”

Bonus Omega; overnight golden-era and backpacker hip-hop / rap.

[cranberrymoons]

all you have is your fire

prompt: monsterfucking (kinktober), "arsonist's lullaby" by hozier tags: demon eddie, monsterfucker steve? rated m notes: a sort of loose interpretation of today's @eddiemonth prompt but i was looking at kinktober and listening to the song and i think if you get it, you get it... you know? it's a Vibe thing more than anything. anyway this is out of my usual style! i hope you like it 🔥🦇

—

The tail slithers around him, the wings holding him close, and Steve gasps, breath and hands and lips trembling as he’s drawn further in.

“There’s no need to be scared, honey,” the thing says, smooth as silk as sharp-nailed fingers skim down the hot column of his spine. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

The hand reaches the crest of the small of his back, and Steve gasps, short and sharp. The fingers crawl lower, the press of lips at his throat and the threat of razor-sharp teeth grazing his skin, and Steve feels it shiver through him like an electric current.

“Who are you?” His voice comes out as a barest whisper, shaking. “Wh – what are you?”

It laughs, a low and rumbling purr that rattles its way through Steve’s bones. The hand ghosts lower still, and the tail tightens its hold around his waist to tug him even closer until his hips are pressed tight against other hips.

“Very good,” it says, amusement curling through its voice. “My smart little thing, asking the right questions already.”

The wings wrap around him, blocking out the rest of the room until all Steve can see is the face in front of him, the eyes and the lips and the teeth and cheeks dotted with pricks of starlight. It scans over him eagerly, hungrily, and its other hand pushes back through his hair, moving it away from his face. Steve feels his breath rattle again, and it hushes him as if it’s soothing a small child, then it bends forward, and Steve’s eyes flutter shut in spite of himself as he feels its tongue lick over his lips and into his mouth. 

Claiming him. 

Possessing him.

“You can call me Eddie,” it says quietly. “And I don’t want you to worry your pretty little head about what I am.” 

The fangs flash, just enough to bring a bead of blood to Steve’s lower lip. Eddie’s tongue darts out to lick it away as Steve feels something skate over his shoulders and down his back, and he arches toward him, gasping, hips stuttering.

“All that matters is that you’re mine.”

[also on ao3] (same length on ao3)

[calcitedraws]

if Mc was food poisoned by the golden arches or a brand of frozen food,

Whos getting an arsonist degree or law to enact justice ⚖️?

Unless the food poisoning was a directed attack, neither August or Fen will be committing arson. But hypothetically, what would they do if someone actually attacked you? It mostly depends on the severity.

But, Fen would mostly be worried about making sure you make it through your sickness. Keeping you hydrated and as comfortable as you can be in this situation is what Fen funnels their nervous energy into. I think Fen has a really good chicken noodle soup in their little binder of family recipes.

August does something similar except he can't cook so it's canned soup for you.

[mara-xx217]

Ayo I love the way you write the DBD stuff! May I request something NSFW with Blight and a Female Reader, where he's being gentle, and has that sweet 'n fluffy jazz going on if, pretty please?

Woah! This might be the first ask I've gotten for the Blight! Awesome! Love my goopy boy lol

Warnings: Fluff and Smut, Wet Kisses, Handjobs, Oral, Gentle-ish Sex

The sounds he made were more like those a wounded, sick animal would make but you didn't really mind so much anymore. You were now able to decipher the noises Talbot would make. A scoff of indifference, a gurgle of glee, a shudder of pleasure...

There wasn't much of a mouth to kiss, at least in the traditional sense. It was always wet, not that he could help it much, but really how could you possibly complain? It was sloppy and overflowing with saliva that was laced with that bright orange serum that runs through his entire body but it was also intoxicating and sent a thrill down your spine as it dripped down your chin and ran down your neck....

You leaned over Talbot's lap and fiddled with his belt as his hand smoothed down the length of your spine. He all but purred as you freed his cock, taking its hard length into your hand and giving it a slow stroke as you pressed your lips to the tip of its head. Pale, orangish precum was already leaking from its tip and it along with your spit helped lubricate his member as you took it into your mouth.

The way he stroked your back and pulled your hair out of your face while making sure to not pull it too tightly made you feel a little warm and fuzzy on the inside. Talbot was gentle- far more gentle than you ever expected him to be- not only for his role as a killer but merely in general. He didn't treat you like glass though. It was more like you were something to be treasured but not put out of reach. Something important to him, to his daily life, not merely to be used but to be enjoyed as well... It was so... So...

You arched your back a little as you felt one of his clawed hands slip underneath your underwear. Talbot wasn't shy about feeling you up, especially in moments like this, where you were already taking him into your mouth and more fun was in the foreseeable future. Not that you minded. You leaned forward even more, giving him better access to your lower half, something that had him growling as you bobbed your head up and down his cock while sucking harshly.

His fingers found you wetness and didn't hesitate to explore your core. Your eyes fluttered shut and you hummed softly as he pressed inside of you. Already, even you were this wet... You didn't want to wait long, Talbot could tell from how well you took his fingers and how much of him you took into your mouth at a time.

He couldn't wait much longer either, so the feeling was mutual...

The pace always started out slow. Talbot wanted to enjoy every moment as he teased his way inside of you. You're so wet and warm and soft... He can never keep himself still long enough for him to truly enjoy it though... Talbot's hips have a mind of their own accord and they show no mercy as he sinks all the up to the hilt inside of you.

"O-Ooohh-! T-Talbot-!~"

You couldn't say much else as he began to fuck you with enough ferocity to leave you breathless and stunned silent. All you could really do was hold on for dear life as Talbot fucked you senseless over and over again.

His sharp nails always bit into your skin but he never broke through your skin. He made you feel so good... Every moment, every movement, was pure and utter bliss...

You're always left breathless and trembling underneath him. Filled, overflowing and spilling out at every thrust of his hips. Your face wet with saliva and tears- tears of pleasure and joy- as you gasp for air...

Oh, he always made you feel so, so good...

@prettycutebunny, @infinitewhore, @kennbb, @slutwithadegree, @dead-bxxxtch-walking, @space-arsonist, @pink-soft-shadow, @sinlessdesire, @hoemine

[deffdread]

“The Arch-Arsonist is a semi-mythical figure in the empire of Charadon, for he counts his victories not in worlds conquered, but those left burning in his wake.” - Ork Codex 4th edition 2007

#warhammer #warhammer40k #40k #orks #archarsonist #charadon #inktober #inktober2023 #orktober

[monstersdownthepath]

Another thought popped up into my head, and this isn't really to do with monsters but curious as to your thoughts regardless: How would you expect a Paladin of Abadar to avoid Falling? Given Abadar's frowning upon charity. A Paladin of Abadar would be told by his god's tenets to let the needy go without if they can't muster up the funds or ability to pay a service back (See: Crimson Throne, where a Cleric gets told to let the sick die more or less), but I'd argue that ignoring the needy when you can help them is an Evil act. Maybe not enough to fall on its own, but certainly a black mark. Not to mention the expectation of trying to use legal means to free, shall we say, unpaid and unconsenting workers, with the question arising of what happens when legal means fail. Would these guys just stay away from those situations? Always being on the frontlines of the wilderness or like instead? Lots of scrolls of Atonement? Or am I holding Paladins to higher standards than they are since before certain lore updates you could find Paladins in official positions in states that had less-than-moral policies regarding certain races or classes of people, like Molthune? It might not be as bad as Chelish policies but that's a low bar to clear.

------

I will say that the Abadaran Cleric (and the Church of Abadar in general) in Crimson Throne had some... extenuating circumstances that made their policies come off as significantly more harsh than they were likely meant to when they were first established. Without going into too many spoilers, plagues tend to stretch resources thin.

Secondly, while Abadar may frown on charity, there's nothing saying that one couldn't invest in a local shelter and/or soup kitchen, as to take care of society's most vulnerable until their situation improves! Abadar has a dim view of charity because a society needing charity means that a society is failing its people; if there are innocents with needs going unmet, it means the money isn't circulating as it should, and something is stopping the settlement's proper progress and growth. Hm...

Side note, while doing some research for this answer, I came across Abadar's paladin tenants, which include: "I make opportunities, and teach others to recognize them. When I aid others, I open the way for them, but will not carry them—they must take responsibility." So, he's a very 'teach a man to fish' kind of god which will absolutely rub people the wrong way, but that's why gods like Sarenrae and Shelyn exist for contrast.

As for the rest of this ask, a Paladin of Abadar is obviously going to be a warrior, and a warrior will solve problems as a warrior sees fit. If the laws are unjust and settling them legally and peacefully is not possible, then perhaps the corruption in the courts requires a more direct approach...?

[aries-writingblog]

Enemy Fire: 22

Summary: There's a new kid in town, and she's got a city to usurp.

Pairing: Jason Todd × F. Reader

Word count: 3.1k

Warnings: language, mention of death, violence

AN: photos are from Pinterest

“Let’s say we have a hostage situation.” Tim began, setting his scene. He snatched Dick by the shoulder and instantly kicked his knees out, shoving him down. He wrapped an arm around his throat, holding him to his body. “There’s two gunmen and seven hostages, one of the guys is holding a woman to him like this as a shield. What do you do?”

Dick lifted a brow, slightly confused on how he had been roped into the situation. He’d have thought this particular training exercise had faded with time, but it seemed every vigilante went through the same initiations.

“Take out the gunmen.” YN responded, as if it were the simplest thing she had ever heard.

“Which one?”

“Both.”

Tim tightened his grip on Dick’s throat— causing him to let out a small squawk. Duke’s lips curled into his mouth and he bit down on them, his eyes wide. Damian only lifted at brow (because his answer had been the same in this little exercise and he had been chastised accordingly).

“There’s a hostage involved.” Tim stated incredulously.

YN shrugged, her hands digging into the pockets of her sweatpants. Jason snorted, tipping his head back to the chair head rest. He watched through half opened eyes, using his socked foot to spin the desk chair half way and turn back.

Dick shot a glance to his cynical brother, only for the undead to wiggle his fingers in an acknowledging wave.

“I’m neutralizing the threat and getting the majority out alive. Win- win.” YN argued, shifting her weight from side to side. Quickly growing bored of the games they played.

She had been trapped in the Batcave for the entire morning, listening to them prattle on about vigilante rules. Informing her of everyone’s roles, testing her in scenarios, such as the one she currently, assumably, got wrong. Again.

“Uh, no— it’s definitely a lose-lose.” Duke interrupted, startled at her blasé statement on another person’s life.

Before arriving at the manor, Duke hadn’t seen so many differing opinions on superhero-ing. Then he met the Justice League and the Titans, and various other, disenfranchised heroes. Most of them always agreed: save the people you can, and do no harm.

Then he met Stephanie, who’s main goal was to save people, disregarding property damage. Cass, who saved everyone, no matter their side. Jason, who had his own complicated history and penchant for violent delights. And Damian, who seemed to be likened to YN.

Damian was still young, he had time to change his path and he had been performing wonderfully under guidance. But YN felt different.

She was older, more cemented in her ways. And she was a meta; Destructive in her very nature.

“She’s worse than Damian.” Tim moaned, dropping his grip on his older brother’s throat.

Damian scowled, narrowing his eyes at the frustrated young man across the room. He had been perched on the couch in the Batcave, fairly interested in the newest arrival in the Mansion.

He hadn’t dealt with many meta’s up close. They only showed up occasionally in Gotham— more common in Central City. Though, that place had too many to count and they showed up out of the woodwork.

And this Meta was a curious specimen. A pyrokinetic, perhaps arsonist, considering she had set fifteen fires in the city. Or perhaps just an assassin, seeing as she had formal training from somewhere that rivaled Jason’s League and Batman training, and she attempted his life.

Either way, she was in Gotham for a reason; Unspecified by Todd, even though he had argued on her behalf, heavily.

“Your main goal is to get everyone out alive and as unharmed as possible.” Dick instructed, pushing himself to his feet.

The woman arched a brow, leveling her gaze.

“Sacrifice tends to be necessary.” YN explained simply.

Dick sighed. He almost deflated, he had been hoping this one would be easier. He’d trained many heroes, he took pride in his work. Guiding others was what he was good at, something he found that came naturally, somehow.

But every now and then, he hit a roadblock. With a trainee, such as YN. The good news, was that he had been able to train her type. The more depressing news meant that they were on a long journey, and progress was going to be slow.

“What if she was a mother?” Tim asked, his last ditch attempt at swaying her.

“People die everyday. It’s what they do.” She declared, impatient with their feeble arguments. “What difference does it make? It could be her, a seventy year old man in Japan, a toddler in France.”

Quiet fell over the group, all the vigilantes sparing glances at each other.

Dick’s glance went to Jason— asking if he had made the best decision in trusting her. Jason’s multicolored eyes hardened, keeping his steel gaze level.

If he could change, from Robin, to Arkham’s Knight, and then to the Red Hood, anyone could change. He had to believe in that. Otherwise, what would he be?

Would he still be The Knight? Still hellbent on his revenge, stuck in a cyclical kaleidoscope of delirious, half conscious anger and betrayal.

Or would he be that boy from the Narrows— the boy blunder, Robin? The boy who struggled to survive. Who never truly believed things would get better. Too headstrong and self confident; Practically killing himself to prove his worth to his mentor.

She had to be capable of change. It had to be possible again— he wasn’t a fluke, it could happen again. For her.

“The difference is the people who love them.” Dick explained.

The doors of the elevator opened, revealing Stephanie and Cass.

The two girls had been busy that morning, leaving this round of training to the boys, but decided they would join after they returned. When they walked into the wall of tension, they shared a glance. Realizing they had entered at the wrong time.

“Attachments get you killed. People should know better.” YN snapped, spinning on her heel and finding her own way to the corner of the room and stormed up the stairs.

Cass and Steph slowed to a stop, joining the others in staring after her.

“Maybe we should’ve left her in Arkham.” Tim suggested, almost sheepishly.

Jason barked a ‘hey’ in offense, on her behalf. He leaned forward in his seat, preparing himself for an argument. Dick scrambled to stand between the two, also in preparation.

“Whats going on?” Stephanie demanded.

“Jason brought a psychopath into the house.” Tim cried, his hand flying out to gesture where the staircase was. The door at the top slammed closed.

“Yeah, and I can ask if she’d be willing to clip the wings of a certain red bird. She’s got the time.” Jason growled.

“Shut up.”

“Boys!” Dick shouted, his stern voice ringing through the cave. Though their arguments died out, the tension lingered. “She just needs time. Look at Damian— he’s turned out fine.”

“Yeah, he’s a real peach.” Tim muttered. Damian barely acknowledged his hostility, opting instead to take the high road.

‘So, she failed the hostage simulation?’ Cass signed, leaning forward into the conversation.

“Terribly.” Duke nodded, agreeing with Tim. Jason scoffed, rolling his eyes at the exaggeration. “She killed several hostages, at least. And the gunmen.”

“I think I’ve found my newest best friend.” Stephanie decided, before another argument could break out. She jutted a thumb over her shoulder. “Cass, you coming?”

‘Right behind you.’

Jason watched them board the elevator again, to begin their search for YN. He supposed it was good that the girls were in the Mansion.

YN had been surrounded by testosterone for far too long. The whole place reeked of men, attempting to mark territories and set boundaries. Ignorance and simple minded natures seemed to flourish between the walls of Wayne Manor.

It would do her good to be able to relax around women. He hoped it would be a comfort at least.

“All of you people are so stabby.” Tim decided, breaking the silence. He turned and marched off deeper into the Batcave.

Duke wasted no time in following him. Dick, on the other hand, wavered between the two groups.

Jason made the decision for him and got up from his chair. He started for the stairs, just in time to hear Damian mutter:

“I like being stabby and you won’t change my mind.”

Followed immediately by Dick’s sigh.

“These are ready when you are, madam.” Alfred called out, leaning his rake against the rose trellis.

YN shoved off of the wall she had leaned against, stalking closer.

Calling on the flame, it gathered in her hand— veins lighting up in her forearm as she held it steady.

YN had stumbled upon Alfred’s garden by accident. She had escaped the so called ‘training’ in the BatCave, her heart still racing from their judgmental monologues.

Adrian’s conditioning had been tough— bone shattering in intensity. How did they expect her to change overnight? Especially when she didn’t know the right answers— she didn’t know what they wanted to hear.

Luckily, Alfred didn’t ask any questions when she nearly fell over herself upon entering his garden. She had simply observed for a moment; Watching as he raked piles of leaves and pulled up dead plants— tsking at himself for another plant lost.

When she asked if he wanted help, he gestured to the piles.

‘It would be a wonderful soil nutrient to have the ash of those leaves, if you don’t mind.’

And she certainly didn’t.

The itch to release her fire had been building for hours, and he was offering the outlet.

YN let the fire slip between her fingers, like molten lava; Cascading down to the wheelbarrow of leaves.

The dried tinder lit immediately, the leaves curling inward as they shriveled. Embers sprung to life, flames running rampant.

Satisfied, YN turned, planning on returning to her previous place of sulking, until her eyes landed on broad shoulders. Standing in the middle of the garden’s archway.

Her eyes met the billionaire’s, expecting at least a few questions about her current actions.

Bruce only cracked a small smile, nodding to the fire behind her.

“It’s not the strangest thing I’ve seen between these walls. I have a house full of boys— things are lit on fire more often than I’d like to admit.” He joked. Alfred snorted, but otherwise made no acknowledgement of his boss’ sudden presence. “I wanted to ask for your time.”

This time, it was Yn’s turn to laugh— a short burst that sent her head tilting back.

The heat of the fire blazed pleasantly at her elbow, lapping at her patiently.

“You’re the one in charge of it.” She accused, hands dropping to her hips.

Bruce glanced down to where the flames licked her skin. She was seemingly unfazed and unharmed.

“You have free reign of the grounds, here.” He supplied, shoving his hands into his pockets. YN snorted, a roll of her eyes following. “Let’s go for a drive.”

“No.” She replied, slowly.

From what she had gathered from Jason, and the overall behavior of the others, they still didn’t quite know how to act around her.

To them, she was an arsonist. She had killed before, and who knew when she was going to snap again.

‘Jason brought a psychopath in the house.’

It was her own fault, she supposed.

“It’s safe. Pinky swear.” Bruce held his hand out, pinky finger extended.

YN eyed it, cautiously.

Bruce Wayne. Billionaire, playboy, Gotham Heartthrob, masked vigilante— offered pinky swears?

She would have thought he was mocking her if his face wasn’t so sincere. He had been a father for quite some time, she supposed. This dork behavior was probably just second nature.

Who knew Batman was secretly a dork in a cape?

YN sighed through her nose, reaching out to link pinkies for half a second before she dropped it and brushed past him.

Bruce only smiled and followed after her.

“You’re telling me that on his first night as Robin, Jason slipped off a roof and landed on top of the thieves?” YN repeated, wiping her fingers on a napkin. “And you’re asking me to believe it?”

Bruce nodded, a reminiscent smile on his lips as he took a sip from his cup.

“As I live and breathe.” He declared.

“Shit.” YN laughed, shaking her head.

It was difficult to think of the Jason she was coming to know as inexperienced. A young boy, who truthfully had no business in tights, fighting crime.

“He did lots of things when he was young.” Bruce recalled, fondly.

YN hummed, taking another bite of her burger.

Bruce had done just as he promised. The pair got into one of his sports cars, he drove them into the city, where he bought fast food, and then drove them to the outskirts of town.

They parked on a large hill, a lookout sight, that was a portion of the nature reserve turned park.

As they sat on the hood of his car, YN could see all of Gotham. The sunset glow was reflecting off skyscrapers, streetlights had begun turning on. The streets were packed with people driving home, to work, out to meet friends.

Not sitting with a billionaire eating greasy burgers and fries, watching the setting sun.

Her life was getting stranger by the day.

“You remind me of Damian, when he was first dropped at my doorstep.” Bruce decided, dunking a few fries into his ketchup. YN sipped her drink, allowing him to chew before continuing. “Headstrong, stubborn. Distrustful.”

She sucked in a breath through her teeth.

“You really know how to compliment a lady, playboy.” She teased, poorly suppressing a smile.

He chuckled, shaking his head.

So far, she had been perfectly pleasant company. Bruce had done everything he could to soften his masculinity. If what Jason told him (and the swathes of information he pieced together on his own) were true, she would only resent the male ego.

It had worked wonders.

YN had actually warmed up to him. Carrying a conversation without complaint, answering questions; Though a little vague, he took what she gave.

He was beginning to see why Jason had taken a liking to her.

“Jason lobbied for your freedom—“

“Stop.” She interrupted. He did as she commanded, falling silent and waiting for her to keep going. YN ducked her head, averting her gaze. “I’m already confused in this whole situation, I just want to go forward.”

Jason had broken down, eventually, and finally gave her a partial explanation.

They had sat together in her room for hours that night. He had been in the proverbial doghouse for most of that time. She nearly strangled him every time he brought up a new, more interesting point.

When he told her he ordered the hit on her, she actually put her hands on him. Pressing against his Adam’s Apple, attempting to cut his air supply.

She had eventually sobered up, and taken a deep breath.

She was still confused on the whole thing— the motives behind every action baffled her. But YN decided it would be easier to ignore it all instead of trying to understand these people.

Bruce, however, took her statement to mean she was taking the high road. To move on.

And that took miraculous strength.

“You’re going to be a fantastic vigilante one day.” Bruce muttered.

YN shot a sideways glance at him, her lips pursed.

He apparently hadn’t heard the reports from his children, yet. Nor had he seemed to be deterred by the news reports.

She wondered what his plan was. Because he had a plan; That much she was sure of. There was no way he was letting a meta into his home, in on his secrets, without something.

Besides, he was Batman. Vigilante grandé.

His backup plans had backup plans.

But his face read a different story. A much simpler one.

“You gambled on me.” She confronted him, shifting to face him instead of the city.

“It was an informed decision, trust me.” He stated. Yes, he had searched and scraped information from as many sources as he could. And he made a decision based on everything he had learned, but in the end, he hadn’t learned much about her. Most of his information was vague and came from Jason. “I told you, Jason wasn’t going to let anyone misunderstand you. No matter how much damage you’ve dealt to the city.”

YN wrapped her remaining food back in it’s wrapper, placing it on the hood. Her phone buzzed in her jacket pocket for the umpteenth time that evening.

She assumed it was Jason, or the group chat she had been added to earlier that day. The girls cornered her in the kitchen, more than happy to include her.

Damian didn’t seem to hold issue with her, and Dick had taken a special interest in forming a friendly attachment with her.

She was becoming quite popular with the Bat Family.

They all seemed to believe she was something she wasn’t. In one way or another.

“Still— feels like a dangerous decision.”

“I’ve made plenty of those.” Bruce assured her. Nostalgia swept his thoughts, taking him down memories he hadn’t thought of in years. “I’ve comforted enemies, dined with those who tried to kill me. You have fire power, Superman is indestructible; My superpower is forgiveness.”

“That is… incredibly cheesy.” YN laughed, breaking the tension that had settled over the conversation. Her fingers picked at the paper wrapper, her eyes remaining in her lap. “How do you do that without losing yourself?”

“Forgive, but don’t forget. Learn from experiences. Show compassion.” He advised. He felt like a hypocrite, saying these things to her, after all he had done. “It’s never easy to take this path, but it’s worth it.”

YN hummed, pulling her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs.

His words were familiar.

“You kinda remind me of my mom.” YN spoke softly, as if she couldn’t decide if she wanted him to hear or not.

Bruce smiled.

“I take that as one of the highest compliments from you.”

[dracomeir]

Here are all my current AUs. Any that are underlined are linked to their story on Ao3, and any without the underline haven't been written yet. Pairings/ratings are subject change as the story progresses. Long post ahead.

Rated M

Renegade Detective (Discontinued) | #fnf renegade detective BF x Pico Detective Pico, leader of the Special Crime Forces, broke up with an incubus called Boyfriend after being betrayed by him. Years later, his worsening mental health causes him to get an emotional support demon. That demon happens to be his ex-lover, and a journey through depression, and regaining trust commences.

Soul Bound Detective (Sequel to above) After becoming mentally stable, Pico helps Boyfriend become an arch demon while they try to solve a serial murder case.

The Musical Trail | #fnf the musical trail Gibbons x Otis, BF x GF x Pico Otis always thought Pico was a hero, but when his cousin turned against the family to become the leader of bandits, his world was turned upside down. As he journeys westward, he learns family is more than just blood, and must stop the ginger's criminal activities before it's too late for redemption. (Most characters are in their mid twenties - early thirties.)

Drowning in Ecstasy (On-going) | #fnf drowning in ecstasy BF x Pico, BF x GF Not really having a purpose in life, incubus Boyfriend and security guard Pico meet each other at BF's bar one day. They learn about each other's problems, and the- Just read the summary on Ao3. It's too long for here. lmao

Life is Fleeting (Sequel to above) | #fnf life is fleeting BF x Pico, BF x GF | Major Character Death Implied After 36 years have passed, the trio open up a café & bakery combo business. The café is open from 10 AM - 2 PM, and the bakery is open from 4 PM - 7 PM. Only people with reservations will be served during café hours, and people must order a week in advance for specialty baked goods. This is how the trio enjoys life as Pico nears the end of his.

Rated 16+

Funkin' Adventures (Complete) GF x BF x Pico Uh... Fuck if I know, but a story totaling 347,522 words separated into multiple arcs for easier reading. This series is the first thing I've written after years of not writing, so the quality goes up, down, and all around.

The Arsonist's Garden (On-going) | #the arsonist's garden Darnell x Pico, Darnell x Nene Darnell is no ordinary alchemist. He happens to work for an order of assassins working to eliminate those in power, and push towards a future where slavery is illegal. Encountering a thief with ginger hair that seemed to occasionally shed tiny embers one night, he learns that this man is not only blind, but a runaway slave. He helps him avoid his former master, but there's more to this person that causes his somewhat peaceful life to turn into one on the run.

The Undying Dragon | #fnf the undying dragon Darnell x Pico, BF x GF A knight employed by the Dearest family called Pico was tasked to slay one of the chromatic dragons terrorizing the kingdom. These dragons formed a cult that was taking over the towns and cities one by one, and a black dragon that had the cunning of their green brethren razed Pico's home village to the ground. Seeing the ginger haired knight following him, Darnell decided to have a little fun. He was caught off guard by the human's combat abilities, and ended up with a burn scar on his chest. After several more encounters with Pico throughout the war, the dragon took a liking to the strong willed warrior. He decided to get captured on purpose with the excuse that he'll gain the intel needed for the cult to overtake the kingdom, but in reality, he just needed a reason to harass the ginger on a daily basis.

Sanity's Embrace | #sanity's embrace Darnell x Pico With the death of his father, angel Darnell is given the crowned halo along with the king's final wish. His unorthodox way of ruling causes doubt to stir in the royal council, and his sanity is questioned as the path of blazing destruction tempts him everyday.

Odyssey of the Sea Pico x Darnell Pirate Captain Pico, and his first mate Nene stumble upon the underwater city Atlantis. After being caught attempting to steal an artifact, they are thrown into a water filled cell where they meet a mermaid called Darnell who was imprisoned for simply "playing" with fire.

FNF Soft: Detective's HeART (Complete) Toughie x Softie, Sven x Grace (Not focused on a lot) Detective Pico was tasked to solve a robbery at the Fairests' mansion, but ends up learning the parents aren't the charitable role models the city claims them to be.

FNF Soft: Investigator's HeART (Sequel to above) Despite being in prison, Benjamin's parents find a way to make Grace's parents frame Pico for a crime he didn't commit. With the ginger out of commission, it's up to private investigator Sven to clear his name, and put a stop to the Fairests manipulation for good.

FNF Soft: Dragon's HeART Toughie x Softie Pico was a dragon disguised as a human, and he worked as Prince Benjamin's personal guard. Another dragon pretending to be human called Cassandra severely injures the prince, causing the ginger to reveal his true form out of rage. The Fairests seized the opportunity to force him into servitude while keeping Benjamin in the dark of Pico's true nature as the kingdom's silencer.

Fall of Hell's Dynasty (Prequel/Sequel to Hell's Dynasty in Funkin' Adventures) GF x BF x Pico After devils destroyed the military school Pico, Darnell, and Nene were in, the trio end up serving the Dearest family. Quickly rising through the ranks, the "Mad" General Pico and his friends work together with Princess Girlfriend and a bard called Boyfriend to overthrow the shogunate, and free the humans from servitude.

King's Guard | #fnf king's guard BF x GF x Pico Assassin Pico and Prince Boyfriend were both pretending to be commoners when they first met, and end up falling in love after multiple encounters. Neither of them knew the other's true identity on the day Pico was tasked with assassinating the crown prince at a masquerade. After failing to protect his lover, the ginger was given a second chance at life by an archdemon called Girlfriend. Together they learn what truly happened the day he died, and find a way to free Boyfriend from his curse of silence.

Shot Through The Heart | #fnf shot through the heart GF x BF x Pico Pico was a spy tasked to become Girlfriend's bodyguard in order to gather intel on the Dearest family. He ends up falling in love with her, and betrays the organization as a result. Boyfriend, another spy thinking his lover was charmed by her, jumps in to save him from the demon's clutches, only to end up falling in love with her himself.

The Gods' Will GF x BF x Pico Pico was a general for the Greece military, and suffered defeat by the Romans after using himself as bait to allow his men to escape. He's forced to become a gladiator in order to prevent his friends from suffering a similar fate. Their safety was the only thing preventing him from escaping, and his win streak catches the eye of Emperor Girlfriend.

Guardians of Yggdrasil | #fnf guadians of yggdrasil BF x GF x Pico, Darnell x Pico, Darnell x Nene Pico was the champion of Fenrir, and he was feared by the village due to others thinking he will one day bring Ragnarok upon them. The wolf's rage was only kept at bay by a collar created by blacksmith Darnell, and this collar was named Fenrir's Chain as a result. Despite the ginger not doing anything bad, the villagers kept their distance. This causes the mostly silent man to stay at Yggdrasil for most of his time, and he ends up disappearing one day as a miasma envelopes the forest.

Funkin' Starlights | #funkin starlights Darnell x BF x Pico, GF x Nene After an tragedy caused by Cassandra on stage, idol Pico is unable to perform for years due to PTSD. His lovers and friends help him overcome his trauma while facing discrimination for what he is.

Rated 13+

Cyber Connection (Complete) | #cyber connection Pico x GF x BF After a century being offline, android Pico is awakened by Girlfriend. He doesn't remember anything though, and ends up learning what it means to be human as he regains his memories.

Soul Connection (Sequel to above) Pico x GF x BF, Darnell x Pico A month after the events of Cyber Connection, Darnell questions his own sexuality and gender as his past comes back to haunt him.

Chained By Fate (Complete) | #chained by fate Pico x BF Girlfriend decided it would be a great idea to send Pico and Boyfriend into another world for them to make up, maybe make out, and become lovers again.

Blind Guardian GF x BF x Pico Pico ends up with permanent blindness after being cursed by a devil, and his lovers help him readjust to life without sight.

Lone Wolf GF x Pico x BF Cursed with lycanthropy, Pico abandons herbalist Boyfriend out of fear of hurting him, and finds him again years later with a vampire called Girlfriend. Vampire vs werewolf shenanigans.

I Found A Cat In A Vending Machine & Now My Life Is In Chaos Darnell x Pico, Darnell x Nene Darnell finds a cat person in a vending machine one day, and it turns out to be his long lost friend Pico.

Judgement of Anubis idk pairings yet Something, something, Pico is a servant of Anubis, fuck if I know, Egyptian themed AU. (I thought about this for like a few minutes since it was an option for a path in Funkin' Adventures. My dice said medieval japan instead.)

[stabbyfoxandrew]

🕊️ WIP Wednesday 2/21 🕊️

Tell me to work on my WIPs! One each, please and thanks. I’ll shut my inbox when/if I need to.

1. Vampire Andrew AU 2. Guardian Angel Neil AU 3. Mafia Front Restaurant AU 4. Arsonist Neil / Firefighter Andrew AU *click the links for masterposts for each au!

Here’s Angel Neil (Part 119):

“A lesson from dear ol’ dad?” Andrew asks, arching a brow.

“One of his associates,” Neil says, holding his hand out. Andrew gives him a curious look, but holds the knife out with the handle towards the angel. He lets go when Neil reaches for it, expecting it to clatter to the rooftop. But then it’s in Neil’s hand.

Andrew can’t stop his mouth from falling open. Neil can hold things? He can hold things. What the fuck? Andrew can only gape stupidly as Neil spins the knife around one finger, tosses it into the air, and catches it with the blade pointed towards the sky.

“That is a knife trick,” Neil says, looking back at Andrew. “Killing people is not.”

Andrew nods and Neil turns the knife over in his hand to run a finger along the blade, as if assessing it.

“They started teaching me knives when I was about five years old. Ones about this big, I’d say. Feels small now, but back then they were huge to me. Way too large for my tiny hands. Too hard to hold, too hard to… To use properly,” Neil says, emphasizing the word. “But I quickly figured it out, because if I was clumsy I got the shit knocked outta me.”

[freewayshark]

anyone wanna read the arsonist Lucy fic I abandoned

There’s a knock at Buck’s door at exactly ten a.m. His mind had been racing, going over his evidence again and again, looking for holes and finding none, but the second he hears the sharp rap at his door his mind clears, a stillness settling over it that he usually only feels in the middle of a demanding call.

He answers the door, and just as expected, Lucy is on the other side, smiling.

Lucy, his friend, his partner while Eddie was gone. The woman he’d felt a kinship with.

Lucy, the serial arsonist.

“Hey, thanks for coming,” he says, pasting on a smile.

“Yeah, can’t say I expected to get a random invite to your apartment at nine in the morning, but I’m here,” she replies, stepping past him and eying the place.

“Yeah, well, you seem as interested in the arsons as I do, so I thought maybe we’d put our heads together, see if we can notice any patterns,” he says, closing the door before perching on a bar stool. He watches as Lucy dumps her backpack on the dining table and then pulls herself up to sit right on his island, peering down her nose at him.

“I don’t know if I would say interested,” she says, picking up an index card on which he’d scrawled information about the dispatch fire. “Maybe just vaguely curious.”

He nods, easy smile still plastered on his face. 

“Well, I’ve been looking at the incident reports from the suspected arson cases from the last few months, and I’ve noticed a few things.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. All of the fires have one big thing in common–they’re set by someone who knows a thing or two about fire rescue protocol.”

If he wasn’t watching very closely for it, he would’ve missed the way Lucy’s spine goes rigid, because it’s a minute movement. But it’s there. “So, what, you think a firefighter is doing this?”

He shrugs. “Maybe. Wouldn’t be the first time. There’s a long history of firefighters starting fires.”

She nods, looking back down at the index card still held tightly in her hand. “What makes you think it’s someone in the know, anyway?”

“Because the fires rarely block escape routes. The accelerants are never found near doors, or windows that are viable as escape methods. When the fire does obstruct these areas it’s usually only because it had more time to spread before being contained. The arsonist doesn’t want to kill people, and the types of places burned don’t seem to have any kind of connection, so that rules out any kind of revenge based motive.”

She arches an eyebrow at him. “Which leaves?”

“Glory. The thrill of walking into danger and coming out a hero.”

She laughs. “Something you know a little about.”

He doesn’t rise to the bait. “Something a lot of firefighters know something about.”

“Well, in that case, how do you narrow it down? How do you figure out what firefighter is doing it?” she asks, her tone too level to be natural.

He looks her straight in the eye. “Did you know that in 2021 the 147 responded to more fires than any other station in the city, by a wide margin? About five months ago they started averaging about the same as everyone else though. But the 118’s average started climbing.”

She stares him down, and he expects her to start refuting his claim, saying it’s a coincidence, or that he’s making it all up. But she just sighs, and drops his notecard on the pile with the others.

“You couldn’t just take the glory I was bringing you, huh?”

He’d wanted to be wrong. He knew he wasn’t, but he’d wanted to be.

“I’m not in it for the glory.”

Lucy laughs at him. “Yeah fucking right. I’ve known you five months and the only times you’ve seemed alive are right after a big, dramatic save. You live for it, for the thrill.”

He shakes his head. “I love saving people, yeah, but I couldn’t give two shits about the glory.”

She looks at him almost pityingly. “We’re cut from the same cloth, Buck. I was right there next to you the other day talking to that reporter. I saw you smile when she called you a hero. Deep down you are just like me.”

“No,” he barks, standing abruptly, needing to put space between himself and Lucy. She just watches, practically lounging on his island. “I am nothing like you. I would never put innocent people in danger.”

“No you just want to throw yourself into danger and hope eventually the universe will take you out of the equation so you don’t have to.” He sucks in a breath, and she smirks. “Yeah, you know, you’re right, not cut from the same cloth, but two sides of the same coin. I want to live as a hero, you want to die one.”

“That’s not true,” he argues.

“Yeah, it is. I saw you, a couple of months ago, after that rescue that almost went south for you? I saw the disappointment, and I didn’t get it. Because you saved the victim! You had news reporters crawling all over you! But for just a split second, when you realized you survived, you were disappointed. Because you want to go out saving someone. You want to be remembered as Evan Buckley, the hero who gave his life to save the day.” She shakes her head. “At least I want to be around to enjoy people celebrating me.”

“Well, no one’s going to be celebrating you for much longer,” he says bitterly, and her eyes flash.

“What are you gonna do, Buck, turn me in? With all the mountains of evidence you have?” she asks, laughing as she flicks one of his note cards off the island.

He shrugs. “Maybe I don’t have real evidence, but I’m sure it won’t be hard for the investigators to find some. If I could put this together it won’t be hard for someone else to do the same.”

“Then why bring me here and confront me? Why not just turn me in and be done?”

“Because I wanted to be wrong. And I wanted to give you the chance to turn yourself in.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because it’s the right thing to do. Because maybe you can get the help you need instead of just punishment if you admit you have a problem.”

She sighs, looking disappointed in him. “You know, you should be thanking me. I heard that Eddie’s coming back next week. Seems like the dispatch fire made him realize he’s meant to be a firefighter. I got you your boy back.”

It’s true that the dispatch fire spurred Eddie into returning to the 118, but she’s wrong about one thing. “I don’t have him back. I never lost him to begin with.”

She looks down at his index cards again, spreading them around. She points to one. “You’ve got this one wrong,” she says, and he steps forward to see what she’s talking about.

He doesn’t expect the booted foot that smashes into his temple.

—-

His lungs seizing on a hard cough brings him back to consciousness. His head feels like it’s split in two, but that’s not his most pressing issue, because every lungful of air he tries to take is hampered by thick smoke.

He pulls his shirt up over his nose and mouth, but it barely helps, and does nothing at all for the smoke already in his lungs. He’s on his back next to his dining table, and something’s on fire.

He lifts his head, the movement slow and painful. He wants to retch, but he forces the feeling down, knowing it will only make him inhale more smoke.

He manages to focus his eyes, consciousness a fraying thread, but everything clears a little with the sight that greets him.

His front door is engulfed in flames.

He pats his pocket for his phone, but it’s not there. He pats around on the floor before he remembers the Lucy of it all and realizes she must have taken his phone.

Groaning, he rolls over onto his stomach. Everything spins, and he has to fight to hold onto consciousness, the head trauma and the smoke inhalation warring to send him into unconsciousness. But he holds on, and gets his knees under him, doing some semblance of an army crawl towards the dresser stationed between his living room and kitchen. Every inch is hard won, but his movements are so slow, taking precious seconds he doesn’t have. But eventually he gets there, and he uses the drawer handles to pull himself up, grimacing as it pulls him up into thicker smoke. 

He gathers his waning strength and pulls one of the top drawers out so hard it yanks it out of the dresser to crash onto the floor next to him. He drops back down to the floor, where the smoke is thinner and digs blindly through the contents of the drawer until his fingers brush a familiar box. He pulls it out and with shaking fingers pries it open. He fumbles with the bracelet inside, dropping the box when he’s got a firm hold on it, feeling over it because the smoke has irritated his eyes so much he can’t really see through the tears.

But he finds what he’s looking for, and he presses the button that will call for help before losing consciousness once more.

[dylawas-reblogs]

Baldur's gate 3 companions in order of likelihood that they'd smoke a joint, by someone who doesn't smoke weed

Halsin: hasn't had the chance for a while cuz of arch druid shit, but you bet once he's on the road with the gang he takes a moment to roll himself a fat one (or smoke it from a pipe? They've got cigars in Avernus idk what's the blunt economy like)

Jaheira: the fucking moment that woman gets to Baldur's Gate she's sending herself into the stratosphere. Probably the best at rolling the damn things. Rolls for the rest of the group.

Karlach: she'd definitely sit down and savor a blunt. Good way to shut her mind off to The Impending Doom (tm). Probably doesn't have the best prep technique

Shadowheart: has partaken in the past, but doesn't have strong feelings one way or the other about it. Will partake if the mood strikes.

Gale: maybe tried it once back at Blackstaff. Enjoyed it, but is too nervous to do so again with The Orb. Will offer to help others light up though.

Wyll: weed may not be illegal in Baldur's Gate (bc I said so I'm not bothering to look up Forgotten Realms Weed Canon) but he still very much has the stance of "uuhhh my dad said it's bad" (bonus: ulder definitely has had a blunt once or twice)

Astarion: would if he could, but being a vampire kinda makes everything Not Blood a dogshit experience if ingested. If he sucks blood off of someone who IS high, THEN he can join the fun. Not as potent though. Acts like he hates everything about it but refuses to leave the room.

Minthara: not interested. But only because she thinks it's too weak for her. "If you are going to drug me, you'd best make sure it incapacitates me. I will not be insulted with such minimal impact." In truth, she's never done it and is too proud to admit it.

Lae'zel: probably didn't know what it was before she showed up in Faerun, and after hearing what it does, is pretty vehemently opposed. She wants to be alert at all times, thank you, and everyone else getting stoned are idiots

Minsc: "'Smoke a joint?' That would be destruction of property! We are not arsonists! What's that, Boo? What? Oh. Oh! Erm, no thank you."

[mugiwara-no-toshokan]

Some Direction

CisFem Reader x Roronoa Zoro

CW: Language, stalking, violence, sexual themes and situations, ptsd -- surprisingly fluffy despite it all. 18+ only

Chapter 11: Log Posed

It had been two weeks since you were matched, and a week since your voice left you. Your body was covered in light bruises from training with Mihawk. It was hard, it had been years since you exercised regularly in the first place, and second to that, Mihawk was a strict instructor. You had had your choice of Zoro or Mihawk, and had chosen the elder vs the younger, not because you thought Zoro lacked in teaching in any way, but because if you became frustrated, you didn't want to be frustrated at him.

Things had fallen into a comfortable routine, comfortable in the feel of it at least, not that it was a routine you wanted to see continue for any longer than it had to. You woke up next to Zoro every morning, had breakfast with him and Mihawk, started your morning training, cleaned parts of the house, ate lunch, then afternoon training, spent as long as you could manage soaking in the bathroom, and then relaxed a bit before dinner. Some days you cooked meals, most days you didn't.

Mihawk insisted he enjoyed cooking, but you were pretty sure he was making sure you had time to adjust in all manner of ways.

There was no new news on the arsonist, and your voice still wouldn't work. You'd gone to a doctor, Mihawk took you to some nice blonde man who told you to call him Marco, and not Dr. Phoenix when your voice returned. According to his tests there was nothing physically stopping you from speaking, which almost felt worse.

You had been reassured so many times you were almost sick of being reassured. You just wanted to scream at this point, and that made things far worse. If you could just bellow, you'd solve all your problems.

You were sighing to yourself and feeling generally down as you dragged the trash out. You weren't paying attention like you had been and when you dragged the bin out of the gate you didn't look to see if the police cruiser was there or not. You weren't technically supposed to step past the gate by yourself unless there was a patrol car outside, but looking for one was hardly habit, as you generally didn't go out past the gate in the first place.

You drag the bin to curb and look up and down the empty street. Something about it seems wrong, but your brain was lagging behind, as you turn and look another direction you could see smoke rising in the not-so-distant distance. A few blocks down the road maybe, and it looked like a big wood fire.

The sound of sirens finally registers, and that sound clicks into your brain that the cruiser was missing. It had probably gone to assist with the fire, and a cold chill grips your heart. You turn back toward the door and stop short as something flies by you.

An arrow lodges into the doorway, slamming the door shut with a sharp thud and bang. You stumble back a step and another arrow lands between the cracks in the pavement by your foot. Suddenly you didn't feel like you were being hunted, so much as you were being herded, or toyed with.

Your heart is pounding in your chest, but you're oddly calm – your mind is clear even though your adrenaline is cranked. You put your back to the gate and step backward toward it. One step, two steps, nothing came at you through the air. You took a step toward the door and felt that chill again, pulling your foot back away from the door as an arrow arched into view and skittered off the pavement, landing where your foot had been.

Okay, you weren't going to go through the door. You could open the gate itself, but it was heavy and there wasn't a way to get through it easily. For a long minute you didn't move, scanning along the distance, trying to figure out where the arrows were coming from. Maybe if you dashed across the street the trajectory would be bad. The first shot had closed the door, and the second shot had moved you toward the gate, so whoever it was didn't want you panicking and going across the street earlier.

There's was a terribly loud high-pitched sound in the air, and a new arrow literally screamed toward you, landing deep into the gate. It hadn't been anywhere near hitting you, but it had sounded like a scream.

It sounded like you could've been screaming.

Your stomach sinks straight down into your feet. Whoever was shooting the arrows wanted you to stay out here because they wanted someone from inside to come out and find you. You weren't screaming for help because you couldn't scream for help. They didn't want to hit you and risk killing you, they wanted you to scream, and since you didn't, that's why they used such a loud shot after the first three arrows were silent.

"..." You whisper. Your voice is impossibly soft, but you made a noise. "---! ---!" you weren't forming words, but you were making sounds. You were so close!

You ran for the door, ducking down as you felt something brush along the collar of your Gi, and crashing into the door. It didn't give entirely the first time you threw your shoulder and body into it, but the second time you did you were accompanied by an arrow.

Whoever was trying to stop you from going back in had panicked, and the arrow slammed into your Gi, and then into the door at almost the same time that your body did. The door broke under the continued assault, and you fell into the property with a grunt as the door splintered under you. Rolling off to the side, putting the main part of the gate between you and the – by the gods, a sniper, were you really entertaining the thought that some mega-star sniper was harassing you?

Yes, you were staying in a Dojo, and you were matched to someone who had developed a three-sword style of fighting, and the world was a wide weird wild place, and hells you had survived a SERIAL KILLER as a kid, so technically no, this was not the most unbelievable thing to happen to you.

You hear – and see – the front entryway door start to slide open, and your feet are moving before your body has fully understood the risks you were taking. There's a few feet of open air, even with the height of the gate, between where it's safe to stand and the door way to the house.

Clink, clink, clink.

You see the shining shimmer of three golden earrings and will yourself to move faster.

"ZORO!" You scream as loud as you can, and see his eyes go wide as he registers you barreling toward him as fast as you can.

The scream of the arrow means that the projectile's destination is already decided, but you have no way to know who it's suppose to hit. You, or him. Zoro has a better view than you do, and you see his entire demeanor change.

You've never seen him fight, you've only ever seen him practice or instruct, and even when he was practicing you gave him space and didn't watch him. What you saw now was such an alarming change in demeanor that you weren't quite sure that time was still moving forward for you.

Zoro steps forward and drops down to a knee, and there's a flash of something, you can't even see what, that flickers up from his waist to the air over his head. The screaming sound from the arrow ends in a shower of shattered wood. You can finally see the sword in Zoro's hand, as you dash past him and he closes the door behind the both of you.

There's a veritable rain of heavy arrows slamming into the front entry way of the house. The angle of the shots keeps them from getting into the entry way, but the bottom half of the door is a mess by the time things stop.

You stumble into the entry way, barely keeping your feet under you as you the arrows rain down on the house. Your eyes move from Zoro to Mihawk. They both look serious, and so calm that you feel a little like you're overreacting. Adrenaline is keeping you on edge, and aside from your heaving gasps as you try to catch your breath and calm down there's a long silence after the arrows stop.

There's a metal scraping sound and a clear chink! as Zoro sets the sword back down by the entry way, before turning toward you.

"Are you okay?" He questions, and the earlier demeanor is almost completely gone as he steps toward you.

Your mouth opens a couple times, and you shake your head, looking and back and forth between the two of them again for a minute. Finally, you pull yourself together enough to shake your head consciously.

"He aimed at you." You say finally, your voice is hoarse from lack of use, but you keep talking. "He – he could've killed me ages ago. I was taking the trash out front, and there's arrows out there too! He missed! He missed me on purpose like four times! He shot that screaming arrow cause I wasn't screaming, I couldn't! He wanted, he wanted," Tears over take the adrenaline and Zoro wraps his arms around you as you practically collapse into him. "You can't... you can't die, please. Please."

"I won't." He promises you, running his hand over your hair, holding you tight against him. "It's okay, I'm alive."

"You cut an arrow." Your voice was muffled as you spoke into his chest.

"I did."

"How?"

"Practice."

"You can do it again?"

"Yeah."

"You won't die?"

"I won't."

"... I believe you."

"(Y/N)."

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

"... Yeah." You wrap your arms around him. "As long as you keep finding me, I'll be okay." You thought about it for a second. "How did you find me?"

The property was fairly large. There was almost no way to hear the gate breaking if someone was in the dojo, it'd be difficult to hear even from the kitchen, and near impossible from Zoro's room. If you were outside you might hear it, but there wouldn't have been a reason for him to go inside first to come to the front.

The arrow might've gotten his and Mihawk's attention, but it was so shrill it would be hard to say where the sound was coming from so fast.

"I just did." He replies, smiling down at you.

. . . . . .

Smoker and Tashigi were back in the family room with you, Zoro and Mihawk.

Again.

The police had been processing the scene for the last couple hours and you had recounted what had happened so many times you were tired of saying it.

Smoke and Tashigi bowed when you were all done talking. "I would like to extend my apologies," Smoker began. "The cruiser that was assigned to you left to assist with the fire as you had suspected, and now that we know the two incidents are connected, I want to apologize for the oversight that caused such risk, Miss (L/N)."

"They did what they felt was right," you reply. "I can't fault that."

With that the two of them left and you sank into the couch. You could feel Zoro quietly fuming beside you, even if he wasn't saying anything. You weren't exactly sure what had him in a foul mood. He'd been happy to hear your voice again after a week of silence, but after you had recounted the events, he just seemed to get angrier.

"What's wrong?" You ask quietly.

"... I wouldn't have been fast enough." He says after a moment, his voice sharp.

"You're angry at yourself?" You ask, and he grunts. "I went outside without you; shouldn't you be angry with me?"

You look over at him after he doesn't grunt or respond. His face is red and turning redder by the second as you look at him.

"Zoro?" You prompt.

He flushes more than you thought he possibly could.

"I'd rather be angry at myself, than you." He says finally, his voice so quiet you barely manage to hear him.

You feel the heat rush up into your face, because it feels like he just confessed his love to you. You realize you're staring at him in shock when he clicks his tongue, and almost growls at you without turning to look at you.

"What?"

You shift on the couch, bringing your knees up under you and turning toward him. There's still an aggravated look on his face as he turns to face you while you're reaching for him. You lean in and kiss him as the words on his lips disappear into nothing, your hands cupping his face. You can feel him tense for a moment before his body relaxes.

You lean back a little, eyes shifting from his lips to his eyes. You can feel the cool golden spindles of his earrings against your fingers, you can feel the heavy pulse of his heart against your body, and the warmth of hands that are holding onto you.

"I'm alive," you hold his gaze. "You're alive." Your face flushes and an apologetic look covers your features. "I'm sorry I wandered off."

He sighs, setting his head against your chest and pulling you snug against him, your hands slipping off his face to wrap around his head. You run your fingers through his hair slowly, enjoying the warmth and comfort of his embrace. His fingers flex in the fabric of your clothes.

"It's okay," he says, after a long silence. "I'll find you."