#anyways. the last bit i have there about the story is exactly why im working on an 06/johndies crossover it rly works so well man

[axemetaphor]

my dad got his hands on a copy of Sonic 06 for the xbox and asked me to be his play-tester after having a lot of trouble with that speed level right at the beginning (catching up to Eggman's ship on the beach) and i got as far as the Silver battle before giving up, so here's my notes

DISCLAIMER this isnt an invitation to dunk on the game in the notes of this post alright we've seen enough of that. i dont hate the game. no, really, i dont. i respect everything it tried to be and feel bad for literally everyone working on it because, from what i gather, they were green and facing extreme crunch time. sucks for everyone involved. anyway:

the load times on xbox were VASTLY better, which makes a lot of sense, given from what i know the ps3 has a ... strange way of storing/retrieving/loading data, but they were still pretty long and a little too frequent for my liking. still, probably not anyone's fault, tbqh. i'll have to see if the emulator my dad's working on getting on his PC (finally, he's been trying to do that for years now lmao,) has the same issue to figure out if it's a programming problem or hardware. personally im pretty sure it's just hardware.

it's much easier to steer sonic if you use the camera and his movement, but the camera will still fuck you over. this isnt 06 specific though game cameras are Always hard to wrangle lmao

the animations for this game are so strange... i dont say this as a negative whatsoever. it looks like they were mocapped, which is fascinating to me, translating human proportions onto sonic--it doesnt always work, and i personally wouldn't've made the choice to do that, but it makes me want to study it lmao

the voice acting as well is strange, at least in english; im not knocking anyone's work, whatsoever. i still really love the performances. but i think back to this one tweet i made about silver's intro dialogue where i mentioned that i loved the performance, but the poor guy sounded like he'd done a hundred takes of the audio and was losing grasp of Words themselves (As happens to everybody) and Silver's english VA not only liked the tweet but started following me because of it. this was during the trend of not actually giving VAs context for their dialogue, and not really.. respecting them at all, and it makes me sad to think that maybe they did stick everyone in a box, hand them lists of lines, and make them say them over and over until the director got whatever they wanted--or, on the opposite end, were only given enough time for a single take out of the inherent disrespect for VAs that's present in Many fields

the environments are fucking gorgeous and i was genuinely surprised by how many things i could interact with in the levels. granted, i did get stuck on them sometimes, but i doubt the poor devs got any chance to fix that shit. i liked especially ramming Eggman's Cerberus into a statue instead of the wall and watching the statue completely shatter, that's genuinely pretty cool, they couldve just had it be like the walls, static and unreacting. i also liked how the Cerberus decimated those pillars, but thats mostly because the camera kept getting stuck on them

there's very little active direction in the game, save for the floating (?)s, which can sometimes be wordy enough that ive already fucked up and died before theyre done talking. that's probably on my dumbass though.

collision physics in this game ... sure is. i cant remember if all games from the 2000s were like this given i have more experience with older games (pre-00's) + brand fucken new ones so someone else weigh in on this s'il vous plait.

the pre-rendered cutscenes are still fucking gorgeous. delightful.

so much of this game is such a lovely awkward development-stage kind of thing, like awkward teen years. the homing-attack mechanics make me grateful for the auto-targeting of later games. the way he goes from 0 to 100 is in character but hard to play (unwieldy) and makes me glad for the more measured sliding scale of other games. the sprint parts of the game, where youre just steering him, are so fucking cool but i am so fucking bad at them and im glad that in future games the sensitivity of the controls was turned down. it took me some lives to get into a proper rhythm with it, get a sense of just how much of a hair trigger the directional changes were. tails' attacks in this game definitely felt like they could've been much better (throwing the bombs is So difficult to aim, thanks to the camera and how long the animation for it is) and i'm glad they're different in other games--the bombs is a cool idea, just needed to be implemented differently imo

if you knwo more about the development n shit of this game id love to hear it, all i know is they had serious crunch time to release the game alongside the ps3 as its flagship game and had to cut a lot of steps from the process/cut a lot of corners. i attribute a lot of its flaws (and "flaws") to that tbqh. sonic 06 is not a bad game, it's a game that was failed by its circumstances. i dont know fully, im just an animator, i have never in my life made a proper video game.

also this may just be me but i have a theory that this game was meant to be like the Shadow the Hedgehog game, and not rated E for Everyone after all. the darker storybeats (sonic's murder, elise's death, silver's future etc) all feel like they'd have been better-executed at a level closer to that. it feels To Me like they were developing the beginnings of this game (script, designs) in tandem with the endtail development of ShTH, and when it received pushback for the guns, swearing, and violence, they panicked and had to neuter the story. i have a lot of respect for what the game COULD have been.

[suengmi]

can you do where boyfriend! skz are teasing w reader but say a joke that hurts their feelings and they realize and immediately apologize and make it up to you (fluff)

hi anon!! ty for being my first ask, im excited to write! not sure if you wanted full stories/drabbles but i hope you like what i did! <3 also i'm a bit unwell and drained from work so pls be kind. took so long because i ended up writing a lot for some.... like a lot OOPS i trailed off a bit to make it more realistic but asjsdkkjasd anyways im sorry if it's not exactly what u wanted ;_; i did my best, plus i didn't want to make it all the same i guess? but yeah about .6k for each member!

warnings will be written below member names!! all under the cut~

warnings for all: not completely proof read but wanted to answer this prompt asap!! i'm half asleep it's 3am pls also all gender neutral!

┋bang chan ┋

context: grocery store is never fun, especially when your boyfriend doesn't know how hard it can be for you. new!relationship, domestic bliss grocery shopping for a night in

warnings: slight ableism??? before he knows??? idk, chan a bit spicy with his words so not complete fluff my b, some cussing, not the fluffiest pls im sorry idk what HAPPENED

word count: .6k

chan grunts at you, eyes rolling, "i told you it's the wrong one you dumb dumb. "

you look down at the japanese curry powder, trying to make sense of the words written before you. you haven't been with chan for long, but he's treated you better than anyone you've ever met. he's kind, giving and always knows how to make you feel better. he knows that you're happier when it rains, he knows that you get angry whenever you lose a game, he loves that you always defeat him at uno and enjoys how you make a week long parade about it. he already loves you but definitely doesn't know it yet.

there is one thing you're still trying to gauge about chan is how sometimes he can shoot first and ask questions later, and this is one of those moments.

chan frowns, pointing at the curry packet in your hand. "this is the spicy one."

"i'm sorry." you say in a low tone, still trying to read the packet but the font is harder to read, "they look the same."

chan snatches the packet from your hand, placing it back next to the seemingly same ones. "well maybe if you read it you properly for once. i had the runs for like 2 days last time. you know me and spicy no agree."

"i can't.... sometimes."

chan turns to you. "huh?"

you take in a deep breath and speak fast, "i have dyslexia."

"what?" he questions confused.

it's then when the penny drops after a moment of silence. realization a wave over him, all the times he told you to read properly, how many times he made tut noises at your replies not having complete context and how he would grunt when you didn't comprehend something.

"why didn't you tell me? there's nothing wrong with that...?" he prods, gaze gentle towards you.

you fumble with your hands, picking at the skin at the sides of your thumb, your mind trying to find what to say. "i dunno."

he sounds so apologetic when he eventually speaks, he wonders how he could have been stupid. it makes sense. all the times you've told him about your ex and how he called you stupid and dumb for not reading well, making fun of you and saying you just don't pay attention. "i made fun of you so much... wow i'm a dick-

"no it's okay" you interrupt him, a small smile on your lips not wanting him to be hurt.

chan purses his lips while taking your hands in his. he looks at your eyes, his own intense and apologetic. "no- it's not okay, i make fun of you so much for thinking you just didn't pay attention, shit, i'm sorry. i joke all the time about how your brain is always else where."

and with that chan knows that he definitely could have picked up the pieces earlier, that you said it to him, without words. "i'm just... fuck i'm sorry."

"i just you know with my ex they-"

chan pulls you in for a tight hug, as if hushing the words you were about to spill, your glasses pushed against your eyes but you don't mind. he smells like fresh baby powder, his own scent you love mixing in with the clothes he's wearing. you know chan's going to make up for it and that he'll do everything to make you feel better. because you love him too, you just don't know it yet either.

﹋﹋﹋

┋changbin ┋

context: changbin loves working out and you love watching him, even if you don't think he doesn't know. freshly known feelings, uni!au, living together in dorm (i know you said !boyfriend but this was too good not to write hehe)

warnings: CHANGBIN SHAMELESSLY FLIRTING ACK, implications of taking a relationship further (physically), voyeur reader lmao

word count: .5k

you turn your gaze over to your friend, housemate or whatever you two had going on was called. you'd never really thought of changbin as someone you'd like, his gentle an soft nature was a contrast to the man currently a few metres away from you. weights in hand and grunts slipping from his mouth. you lean your head back to get a better angle, the veins on his arm revealing themselves. you knew he liked you and you liked him, but neither of you would dare to open that pandoras box. well, not until tonight.

it's a moment later that changbin stops his routine, almost meeting your stare. you raise your brows, attention turning back to the laptop in front of you. what on earth was i doing? you think, pretending to type something into the computer.

"thirsty?" he asks you, pretending he didn't noticed your eyes on him every now and then for the last half hour.

you turn your attention to him "wha?"

he laughs into his chest, stretching out his arms, "you have drool on the side of your mouth."

"i do- i do not!" you say slamming the laptop down, folding your arms on your chest knowing you've been caught.

changbin laughs, sitting down on the couch next to you, "didn't know i owned a dog."

you had no idea he could be this cheeky, making fun of you for simply watching him. after all, you were perving in a sense.

"don't make fun of me! i know i was... watching."

a smile dances on his lips, knowing that you can be sensitive to these things. "i'm sorry." he almost sounds apologetic... almost. "but... it's just too good to catch you out." he says in a slow almost seemingly mocking way.

"stop it." you mumble, facing the other way. "you know i have issues with... bringing this stuff up."

changbin tugs on your ear to gain your attention, feeling bad for making you feel slightly uncomfortable. but hey, you were the one watching. he smiles and says, "i know i know, i'm just teasing. i'm really sorry."

"i know but... please don't, this is hard for me."

"okay okay," he whines, gently lacing his fingers in yours, testing the waters to see if you'd be okay with this affection. "i promise i won't make fun of you, but if you wanna watch feel free to, don't have to be shy about it."

a blush dances across your cheeks and ears, your tummy suddenly feeling a knot of embarrassment grow. "changbiiiin." you groan, planting your face into the couch cushion.

"okay maybe i lied, i'll definitely enjoy making fun of you."

﹋﹋﹋

┋hyunjin ┋

context: you hate feet. hyunjin thinks it's funny. established!relationship, living together

warnings: obvi mentions of feet?? mentions of vomit

word count: .6k

hyunjin knew you hated feet, just how they looked, how they acted and gripped on the damn floor whenever someone would walk bare foot. hyunjin loved walking around the house barefoot, and it sometimes made you feel woozy, just the image of your own feet touching the floor... imagine. you shivered at the thought, sitting down on the couch next to your boyfriend, his feet dangling off the edge of the couch.

you pat your legs, instructing him wordlessly to lay on your lap. he complies without a thought, scooching back and nestling his head into your soft legs. he let's out a gentle "mm" as he settles in. "soft" he coos, rubbing his head a few times before turning his attention back to his switch.

after another episode of your favourite show, hyunjin suddenly brings his feet up, inspecting one of them. "i think i have glass in this one."

"do you need to do that here?" you say in a tone, eyes avoiding the grippers in sight.

"nah can you just check this one?" he says with difficulty, throwing his foot back towards your face. if you weren't so grossed out you'd probably be impressed by his flexibility.

"hyunjin please--" you swat away his foot with your phone, pushing yourself back into the couch.

"nah see in the big toe right here."

"hyunjin! you know i hate feet stop!"

he struggles, folding his body further to get his left foot near you, "babe just look here near the nail."

and that's when you feel a lump in your throat, nearly retching at the sight. the rice dish you had earlier suddenly feeling not so settled.

"oh shit." hyunjin says in a shock turning his attention to you, hearing your strangled noise. "are you okay?"

"no i'm not okay, go away." you say behind your hand.

shit, he knows he did wrong. his seemingly funny joke was definitely taken too far. he feels bad, real bad. he knew you didn't like feet but not this much. it'd never really come into question the time you'd been together, but god he had no idea.

"jeez i'm sorry." he's unsure where to place his hands and fumbles, words not forming correctly.

you sit in silence for a moment before regaining your thoughts. "don't. fucking. do. that."

hyunjin's eyes are pleading, the guilt in his face almost makes you not want to get him back but then realise you can use this to your advantage. you look over at the massage oils on the table and back at him. "i have an idea."

and you know he'll do whatever it takes. he still had glass in his foot, but that wasn't important right now.

------

┋felix ┋

context: felix thinks your tummy is cute, but you're just not used to it.

warnings: mentions of weight, body issues, tight clothing, BUT ITS FLUFF I PROMISEEEE, felix just a silly soft goose

word count: .6k

"come out please." felix begs, head leaning against the door.

you're sitting in the bathroom on the floor, dressed in nothing but your boxer underwear and a tight bed shirt, felix's bed shirt. you can feel the anxiety seeping into your chest, the weight of reality hitting you. you and your boyfriend had been together for only a month, but this was the first night you were staying at his house. it was on a whim, since most of the trains and buses had stopped running. and of course, you had nothing to wear. so there you were, tight shirt and all. you've never been uncomfortable with your body, if anything you love your body. but for some reason the way that felix talked about your stomach irked you. maybe he meant it as a joke? what did he mean? either way you were upset and needed space for a moment.

"please, i didn't mean it like that." felix sighs against the door, "it's soft and i love it."

you cast a sad expression towards the door. still unwavering from your position. why do you have anxiety now about this? all he did was grab your tummy and tell you it's soft like a kitten belly, or how it reminds him of those marshmallows that fold and how much he loves it because it's you, and he loves you.

you hear nothing but the cracking of a knee, felix bending down to put his fingers through the gap of the door underneath. he splays his fingers like a cat trying to get in the bathroom, darting against the tiles.

"lemme in!" he chimes, grunting to get his fingers further in. "i'll get in either way!" he jokes, using both of his hands under door to attack. it makes you laugh. it reminds me of those videos of cats wanting to get into the bathroom, or videos of racoons grabbing food.

"am i close?" he jokes, moving his hands back and forth.

you groan, stifling a laugh as you get up to open the door. "not even." you say, being met with pleading eyes. you look down at him, his hands still pretending to search where the door once was.

but he suddenly swoops you into a hug, hands around your waist, his head pressed into your soft chest, enjoying the smell of his shirt mixing in with your scent.

you relinquish any negative thoughts you have, melting into the hug. "i know you didn't mean it like that but, i think i'm just nervous... because it's you."

he pulls back, arms still wrapped round your waist, probably a bit too tight. "it wasn't a joke, i do love it." his eye are filled with nothing but love and adoration for you, your body an your mind.

"just... choose different words, please... i'm not a roll of marshmallows."

felix pulls back suddenly before gently pressing a swift kiss to your lips. "tastes sweet." he retorts about your statement, ignoring your words before kissing you again.

"i'm-seri-ous." you say between kisses, you feel his his hands digging into your hips.

instead of stopping, he grins, love apparent in his eyes. "my marshmallow."

you roll your eyes, a bit of anxiety still in your throat but knowing he adores marshmallows, you figure it's okay for now.

﹋﹋﹋

┋jisung ┋

context: a park date is cute until you get attacked my a crow, jisung think's it's funny. established!relatonship

warnings: jisung being a weenie, swearing

word count: .5k

the ground collides with your chest, the mud clouding your vision and your new shirt you brought for the date probably ruined. yep, i definitely tripped and yes it was embarrassing. you think, shame in your chest. of all the days, why your one year anniversary?

all you hear is the cackle behind you getting louder, sharp inhales of breath echoing in your ears. jisung has no shame, actively laughing at you stacking it to the ground.

"ahaha! the crow!!" he gurgles still, bending forwards over the picnic blanket, almost choking on his spit.

"jisung!" you yell, getting to your feet, seeing the mess on the front of you. that fucking crow, why did it choose me?

"jisung!" you yell louder, stomping over to the blanket, definitely covered in mud, dripping behind you as you walk.

"i'm sorry babe i'm-" he says between breathes.

you grunt before wiping the mud from your chest, still feeling it covering half of your face. "it's not funny."

"it fucking is."

jisung's laughs come to a halt as he realised you're upset upset, not just whining like you usually do. he notices how your eyes are suddenly pooling with wells. he stands to his feet and gently holds out his hands, "baby-"

"no!" you grumble, pulling your arms away, tears rolling down your cheek. "i just bought this top. now it's ruined." your dejected tone unsettles jisung, instantly feeling bad for making fun of you.

he says nothing, confused on how to react. but he waits patiently, allowing you to let out your feelings. he's always been good at this, always been patient with you.

after a breath you look back at him, red rings dancing around your eyes.

he smirks as he walks over to the mud and plainly sits down in it as if it what he was meant to do all along. you let out a small laugh, your hands wiping the rest of the mud from your face.

"what?" he asks plainly, as if nothing is weird. he grabs a handful of the mud before pressing it to his shirt, and then another handful to his hair, rubbing it in. "what's funny?"

you laugh behind your mud covered hand walking over to him. he smiles up at you like a puppy, knowing that he's succeeded in making you feel better.

and there he is, completely covered in mud, way more than you are and in that moment you fall just a little bit more in love with him. you lean down and press a gentle but muddy kiss onto his lips.

he stares up at you with nothing else to say, just sitting in the mud. you decide to join him, plopping down next to him, hand in hand as you both just sit in silence and completely covered in mud.

with jisung you didn't always needs words, sometimes the things he did for you were enough.

﹋﹋﹋

┋lee know ┋

context: you're getting ready to go out with friends, but your hair has other ideas, established!relationship, living together.

warnings/other: kisses??? idk, cuss words

word count: .5k

"it's not working!" you huff, re-straightening the side of your bangs for the 6th time. minho was confused at first, wondering why you're so upset over something trivial and small from his point of view. but when he looks up from his phone to see you struggling, his left hand still lazily patting one of his cats. he speaks without thinking,

"it's definitely like a pigs tail." he chuckles, looking back at his phone. in his mind, he assumes that he was just making a light hearted joke, thinking it was cute the way you got so upset over something he coined as small. plus, pig tails are very cute if you think about it.

it wasn't until you made a little sob that he noticed how you were actually feeling. you stare in the mirror, realizing it in fact does look like a pigs tail.

"baby-" he let's out a small but gentle sigh, "i was joking,"

"no you weren't. it... does look like a pig tail." you say between a small dejected sob, lips curled down and hands at your side as you avoid the mirror.

"let me help?" he says so gently as he approaches the bathroom door. instead of letting him help, you just melt into his chest immediately, your sobs muffled by his shirt. "i look like shit." you say defeated.

he lets out a light laugh, kissing the top of your head a few times, "you never look like shit, you know... even with your pig tail."

you step back, immediately hitting the tight muscles of his chest with both of your fists, "fuck off i swear." you talk through your teeth, still frustrated but feeling the urge to laugh in your throat.

"there you are," he says pleased at your spice, fighting with you to place a kiss on your temple, your hand starts pushing on his jaw, his lips puckered and ready. "c'mere." he says through your fingers, still pushing his head towards you, his hands gripping at your neck. "let me-- love you."

after a few minutes of roughhouse struggle, you push him back, feeing slightly better. it's in this moment you realize that you in fact do not enjoy asking anyone for help. but you speak, dejected tone apparent. "yeah... please help."

and nothing else is said while he fixes your hair, gently pressing small kisses on your cheeks as he does so. he knows he can sometimes say things without thinking, but he also knows that you sometimes enjoy just as much as he does. it's why you love him and why you two work so well together. after a few minutes he steps back to admire his masterpiece, a triumphant smile on his lips. "hmm," he ponders, "i liked the pig tail better."

"oi, don't start again you little shit" you say as you begin chasing after him, giggles dancing in with his own as he runs down the hall, nearly slipping on the rug. "get back here! you're in for it!"

﹋﹋﹋

┋seungmin┋

context: seungmin needs to shut his mouth sometimes, even if he doesn't know it. established!relationship, living together

warnings: seungmin being a spicy bitch, some playful physical aggression, kissing

word count: .5k

seungmin has you completely pinned under him on the couch as he covers you with kisses, not relinquishing his hold. "how many times do i have to say it?"

you grunt at the fact that he's weirdly strong in these situations, and as much as you struggle against his hold he's just completely powering over you. just the other day you were the one that had to help him open a jar. but thats besides the point. here seungmin is, currently trying to wiggle his way out of the fact that he took a joke too far. you're determined not to let him get away that easy.

you struggle once more against his hold, your legs flailing underneath him but he's just too damn strong.

he lets out a struggled breath, still above you. his hair falling gently from his face, "isn't sorry enough?"

you turn your head to the side, bottom lip pouting. "no."

"baby-"

you tut at him, tone almost darted, "don't baby me! you've lost your rights."

a gentle grin finds itself to dance over seungmin's face, he likes it when you fight back. he likes it when you put him in his place but still give him enough wiggle room to feel in charge.

"okay," he says with raised brows, "you win. i apologise."

you realise this is the perfect opportunity to get him back, for him making that stupid joke about something he knew you were insecure about.

"oh, whats this? kim seungmin, apologising, what was that?" you speak sarcastically. you're still under his hold, but you'll let it slide for now. "sorry i didn't quite catch that after you made me feel like shit for an entire hour. repeat?"

"i... apologise. i took it too far and i'm sorry."

you feel your chest rise, suddenly enjoying the power that seungmin has given to you. it takes a lot for him to admit he's wrong or that he's done wrong, this is just so damn satisfying.

"actually..." he trails off, letting your hands free a second before quickly grabbing the back of your neck. the kiss he planted on you was fast, and before you knew it you were laying back down on the couch, head dizzy from the sudden kiss, "you can't just make me forgive you with kisses." you speak in a semi-daze.

seungmin presses a kiss to your cheek and then a few more to your lips, the taste sweeter everytime. "i can, actually."

yeah, he's absolutely right. wait, what were we arguing about?

﹋﹋﹋

┋jeongin┋

context: jeongin fucked up, and he wants to make it better. fresh!relationship

warnings: none? kissing maybes, TOO MUCH CUTE

word count: .5k

it only took jeongin about half an hour to attempt to make it up to you.

sometimes being with jeongin was hard, as you both communicated in very different ways, it definitely was something you needed to work on. though, the one thing you loved about him is the absolute time and effort he put into making everything just perfect for you. when it came to you, everything he did for you was worth it.

after taking a walk to calm your thoughts, you realized you were still frazzled from the way jeongin teased you and how you ended up crying, resulting in him just left behind in a confused state. sometimes it took a while for the penny to drop with him, but once he got it, he really got it.

you step through the front door of his house, gently removing your sandals to be met with the sound of jeongin jumping up from the couch, hands out in a display. "ta-da!" he yells, it startles you.

you turn to meet eyes with your boyfriend, his face with a stupid grin slapped across it.

"what is-" and that's when you notice the many items splayed across the ground. there's a few towels on the lounge table, a tub of what seems to be hot soapy water, a box of facemasks and some nail polish next to it. the lighting is low and your favourite soundtrack is playing. you notice the scent in the room, jasmine tea, your favourite.

jeongin takes a deep breath in before showcasing his wares. "salon de jeongin"

"babe i-"

he steps forward, taking your hands in his before guiding you to sit down. "cmon" he coaxes gently, his beautiful dark eyes watching your every step. you say nothing as you follow him, unsure of what's happening.

as if he knows you're going to speak, he places a gentle kiss on your forehead. "i'm sorry."

you marvel at the sight in front of you once more. the fact that he built you a whole salon in his living room within thirty minutes is mind blowing. he knows your favourite scent, your favourite songs and all the products you use. you didn't even realize he had those.

you're still at a loss for words, unsure of where to put your hands or body. jeongin just points to the chair, silly grin still plastered on his face and eyes wide.

you sit down in the chair, eyes darting to jeongin. "does it cost extra for shellac on my nails?"

jeongin pouts in thought, "just a kiss."

"i can do that." you say back at him. and that's all it takes, you know you'll talk later about this and how you can communicate better but this... this was enough for now. more than enough.

"actually," jeongin ponders before leaning so damn close to your face, "i think it's about 4 kisses."

-

DAMN THAT WAS SO LONG I SPENT LIKE AGES DOING THIS MY BAD, i know it's not exactly what u said but oh well i wanted to make them all different!!!! ty for asking!!!!!! <3

[imustbenuts]

nuts reading trigun 4 - i sniffed out the spirit of leiji matsumoto and his galaxy express 999

so this is. a bit of a doozy and a little detour i took...

first off, i thought it was really interesting that chapter 4 is titled Bang!Bang! in EN but ポポ popo in jp. popo is basically pop pop, but also if pitched down, would sound more like 'poooh poooh'. very similar to what sound a steam locomotive makes,

but not quite. the 'correct' one would be ボbo, not ポ po.

like the sound effect here:

sfx: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOH

there's no good way to translate this, to be clear. nightow seems to really like pulling off these weird little japanese wordplay here and there. theres one instance with the escorts trying to sleep with vash, but thats a lot of effort to explain a pun and its not very interesting so. uh. sorry. (these posts take very long to write bc im poopoo)

so. its CH 4: PoPo. 4 =Death? this feels deliberate.

the next chapter is CH 5: 強襲 / Assault. EN title is very accurate here so yippee. but wait.

that. dark contrast and a presence of a vaguely steam locomotive. the framing of the train itself being this romantic machine that was built to send people on their journeys to parts unknown. the presence of 4 = Death.

theres something about the following panel. and i know exactly what it is despite having never read or watched it bc of just how influential this particular work is.

so i went sniffing.

Galaxy Express 999.

and. uhm. i found a thread and a rabbit hole that links back to TriStamp again.

Galaxy Express 999 first ran as a manga in 1977- 1981. Made by the late Leiji Matsumoto (25th Jan 1938 - 2023) who passed away last year.

the gist of this story. we follow a boy named Tetsuro in the super far off future, who wants to obtain a mechanical body so he never again feels the inconvenience of a flesh one. and to also fulfill his promise to his mother who was hunted down in front of him and turned into a trophy by mechanized hunters. he meets a mysterious blonde woman named Maetel who gives him a pass to ride on the Galaxy Express 999, promising him one at the end of the journey, but there seems to be a catch.

the same themes of a train in the darkness, its window the main lightsource, but in GE999 theres the added planets and stars. GE999 is full of promotional material and artwork like this, its iconic

the story is very philosophical and full of questions about death, living, and the worth of a human life. theres a constant theming of the train bringing its passengers to a place unknown, and how its a departure from the base in which they start the further they go. like a wanderer. (something something blank ticket wink wink.)

but anyway. Chapter 2: The Red Wind Of Mars is the interesting one.

i strongly recommend reading this chapter at least, but ill summarize the interesting bits.

the cast arrives on Mars, a Red Planet thats constantly being buffeted by a Sandstorm. its said that the planet is pretty much in a state of poverty and is barren due to people turning themselves into machine bodies and having no need to care for the environment and nurture it.

also an american saloon on this red desert planet wowee--

testurou later gets jumped by a couple who basically wants to steal his pass to the GE999, but once they realize the boy has not been mechanized at all, the couple lets tetsurou kill them. they are then left in the desert to be eventually covered up by the red sand. and then, the final page has this fucking thing:

"They say that the sound of Mars' red wind comes from the wailing of people resting under its sand. This vermilion wind will continue to lament for the fate of those who couldn't make their dreams come true... That's why they say this planet will stay red forever..."

....studio orange. listen.

STUDIO ORANGE. PLEASE

ON WHAT LEVEL ARE YOU GUYS EVEN COOKING. stop sending me on these rabbit hole runs i swear to god ill never finish trigunbookclub at this rate GGGGGGGGGAAAAAH

anyway the sandsteamer arc in the original trigun seems to be a homage to Galaxy Express 999 in a way, and Studio Orange understood the assignment.

[campbyler]

BHDSDNSJDBKSJDK S OMFG OMFG I GIGGLED LIKE A MANIAC LIKE THE WHOLE TIME I WAS READING HOLY SHIT AHHHHHHHHHH THEY ARE SUCH STUPID IN LOVE IDIOTS "yes youre obsessed with me" HOLY SHIT THE SASS OH MY GODDDDDD I WAS LIKE WHAT IS HAPPENING IS MIKE TAKING HIM ON A DATE HOLY SHIT AND THEN HE WAS BUT I DONT THINK WILL KNOWS IT WAS A DATE SBDSKNKJS THE COOL COOL MOMENT SDBSHD JS BSFHBSJDBS WILL LIKES HOW MIKE DRIVES OMFGG THEY LIKE HOLDING EACH OTHERS HANDS IM LITERALLY GONNA START SQUEALING okay mike is so real for his oshawatt pin on his fanny pack also ngl i kinda forgor that will works at starbucks but also like of course he does i feel like thats just a fact that everyone should know OMFGGG THEY ARE BOTH THE MOST CLINGY BITCHES EVER NHJSBUBHJWSBJ "engaging in behavior usually reserved for amusement park queues" HELP WHEN I TELL YOU I WAS TRYING NOT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD SO BADLY THAT I GOT LIGHTHEADED AND ALMOST FELL OUT OF MY BED I AM NOT FUCKING KIDDING I WAS OUT OF BREATH AND WHEEZING FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES AND HAD TO TAKE A BREAK FROM READING NHJBSHBDKS THEY ARE SO FUCKING CLINGY OH MY GOD the vulnerablility 🥺🥺 they are being do soft with each other 🥺🥺 mike is finally opening up 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i love his car shopping list and his reasons 🥺🥺🥺🥺 also jesus FUCKING christ ted is fucking crazy that makes me so angry that he would do that and that it made such a lasting impact on mike that all those years later he would be worried about that happening to him its not okay OMFG OF COURSE HIS PASSWORD IS KERMIT HE IS SO SILLY NSDSHBDSB BESBDNSNDDNKJSNDB HES GONNA TEACH WILL HOW TO DRIVE HIS CAR OMFG OMFG OMFG THAT IS PROBABLY SO INTIMATE FOR HIM TOO BECAUSE THE CAR IS SUPPOSED TO BE HIS BECAUSE NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE HIS CAR AND NOW HES TEACHING WILL HOW TO DRIVE HIS CAR JUST SBHSBDKSNDIJNSFS

you fr knocked this one out of the fucking park thea like full on grand slam, everyone made it to home and the ball went so far we couldnt even see where it landed i am very thankful that you guys take the time to write these chapters so well anyway happy holidays 🫶 (and merry july in christmas lmao)

AHHHH OMGGGGG SUCH A LENGTHY REACTION I HAVE BEEN SO BLESSED!! LET ME TRY TO RESPOND PROPERLY (picture me cracking my knuckles without cracking them ty)

i am loving this play by play of everything!! i do need u to know that this has been Exactly what my brain has been doing on overdrive since likeeeee. february or march when we first drafted the concept for ch9 😭😭😭 i loveeeeed including the detail of mike's fanny pack and it's def most of the reason why i really want to draw their outfits!! i think will's starbucks job has either only been mentioned once or has only been mentioned on this blog, but it's a very important part of the universe #2 #me 💚 ALSO HELLLOOO I HOPE YOU ARE ALIVE AND OK AFTER ALMOST FALLING OUT OF YOUR BED???

i will sayyyy the ted story was definitely a bit of projection teehee (thanks #mom) but i did think it fit superrr well and was a really strong reason for why owning the car would be so important to him! i was so excited to be able to have him open up this chapter as well :')

i did have to debate between using snoopy and kermit for mike's passcode but kermit won out!! also YESSSS U ARE HITTING THE NAIL ON THE HEAAADDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!

ty so so so MUCHHH for your kind words and huge reaction, i'm so glad you enjoyed!! happy holidays and merry christmas in july!!!

[pub-lius]

im lowkey losing count but lafayette pt. 6???

okay this is a little bit embarrassing because this part will have a lot less detail since I'm both uneducated and lazy when it comes to the French Revolution SFHKSJFHSKJ also the details about lafayette in this section are highkey boring sooo here's pt. 5 and lets get moving

In Between Revolutions

Lafayette returned home from the war in December 1781, but no one really cared because Marie Antoinette had just given birth to her first son, so they were like. "ok! anyway" when they saw him.

He didn't spend very long in France, and he returned to America to do a small little tour of the states in 1784. He stayed at Mount Vernon for a little while, which would be the last time he ever saw his adoptive father, George Washington.

I'm going to talk about slavery now. Lafayette never commented on slavery at Mount Vernon, mostly due to his reverence of Washington, however Lafayette was proactive in abolitionism. He created his own plan to purchase an island plantation where the enslaved people would work to earn pay and be able to buy their own freedoms. He and Adrienne both arranged for education programs and career options for the enslaved people so that they would be well-adjusted to society by the time they were awarded their freedom. However, property seizures during the French Revolution would prevent them from ever being freed. So, you could say Lafayette owned slaves, but you have to consider that the only enslaved people he ever purchased were for this specific project.

Also, I'm begging you to look into James Lafayette and Peter Ostiquette (Otchikeita) because I don't have time to get into their stories here but they are really interesting POC figures in early US history. send me an ask if you want, i just don't have enough patience to do the research along with all this lafayette shit

While he was in America, he helped negotiate a treaty with the Six Nations/Iroquois with James Madison, since he already had particularly good relations with the Oneida tribe. The Oneidas gave him the name Kayewla, which was the name of one of their former warriors.

He returned to France after his short visit and helped negotiate trade agreements between his mother country and the United States along with Thomas Jefferson. Technically on paper, Lafayette was only supposed to have an advisory role in these international affairs, but he just. started doing it. and this pissed off a special someone.

That special someone was, of course, John fucking "I'm a bitch to everyone and wonder why they don't like me" Adams. Btw Lafayette did NOTHING WRONG to him, he was just butthurt. Lafayette would continue to press for an official representative of France (which wasn't allowed since he was allied to both France and America) while John Adams was fired <3

Lafayette was also a little involved in the Society of Cincinnati controversy, but he followed Washington's lead by not getting too involved. He was also a part of the Republic of Letters and the American Philosophical Society. With all that along with being a Freemason, he was basically admitting to being in the Illuminati

Could you imagine if I was just like a really intense conspiracy theorist and this is how you found out? I'm not but like. that's pretty funny

French Pre-Revolution

When Lafayette reestablished himself in Paris, he was a much richer, much more confident guy, which allowed for all kinds of rich guy shenanigans. These shenanigans included, two affairs, being a karen, getting into debt, and politics! Let's talk about the politics part, because I don't get paid enough to talk about all of it.

Lafayette was elected to the Second Estate of the Assembly of Notables, which has a french name thats almost exactly the same but I'm too lazy to type accents. He had very ambitious goals that aligned with his very liberal morals, which caused him to be closely allied with the men of the Third Estate aka the rich poor people.

Lafayette would end up having a crucial role in the writing of the Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Citizen, and a more minor role in organizing the Constitution, since he was too busy with the actual revolution!

The French Revolution Revolution

I just want to preface that, in the French Revolution, Lafayette was considered one of the leaders of the moderate party. "But pub-lius, I thought he was super radical because of his behavior during the American Revolution!" Yeah, well, little richie, you're fucking wrong. There are always bigger fish and there are always more liberal white men. Lafayette would get out-liberaled and out-conservatived by almost everyone during the Revolution, and that's why he didn't last. Basically. Pretty much.

Lafayette was named Commander of the National Guard in 178 which made his name even longer by the National Assembly, which was the first Revolutionary French government! There would be fifty million fucking more governments from now until 1792 i swear to fucking god-

If I sound stress to you, it's because this is literally the most stressful part of Lafayette's life, and actually I don't think it gets more stressful than this. I'd say Lafayette was more stressed as Commander of the NG than Washington was as Commander of the Continental Army. He was basically always running back and forth across Paris, putting down rebellions, and starting massacres because he's stupid, and organizing the Fête de Fédération, and constantly being threatened with lampposts and pikes. It stresses me out just reading about that.

After the more liberal white men took over the French government in 1792, Lafayette fled the country expecting more friendly faces outside France's borders. He was fucking wrong, he got arrested by Austrians immediately. He remained in prison for like five years or something.

What had happen was Lafayette was viewed by the powers of Europe as the motherfucker responsible for bringing the revolution to France, and they decided they needed to take the bitch out back, except not really, they just took his clothes and put him in a dirty cell for a while. Eventually, Adrienne and the girls joined him, while Georges Washington de Lafayette escaped to America to live with Alexander Hamilton. Which that is just a really American thing to happen.

This imprisonment had severe consequences for Adrienne, who would be permanently injured by the illness she and the others suffered while in prison, which would eventually cause her death in 1807, but we're not done with her yet.

Womp Womp Napoleon is in charge, and he doesn't like Lafayette, because Lafayette said he was a dictator, and that hurt his feelings, so he exiled Lafayette and his son and sons in law. So, while Lafayette was gardening in exile, Adrienne stepped up to the mother fucking plate and went into Paris every day to absolutely girlboss her way into reclaiming her family's citizenships and fortunes and KICKED ABSOLUTE ASS YOU GO GIRL I LOVE YOU.

Also I'm fairly sure it was during this time that Lafayette fucked up his leg by slipping on ice and breaking it and then it was improperly treated so his hip. rotted???? and he was in severe pain for the rest of his life. Nice going, fuckface.

Retirement and DEATH :'(

Lafayette did manage to scrap together a bit of a career after reentering France. He was elected to the Chamber of Deputies and had minor political roles along with his son, but he was more like an antique vase at this point.

He did go on a tour in 1824 and I highly recommend checking out The Lafayette Trail, where they track every place he went during this Farewell Tour!! It's so cool and I love them. I looked into if and when Lafayette came to Louisiana, and found out his fucking ship sunk on his way here FKSJFHSJ so he was stranded in the Mississippi river for a little bit which is silly.

While Lafayette was managing his estate, La Grange, he made many young friends, to whom he served as a mentor. In return, they kept him appraised of all the political and scientific developments which he was very interested in. La Grange is very interesting, since it was largely based on Mount Vernon, which if I think about that too much I'll cry.

And then... Lafayette died on May 20, 1834 at... 4:20 am. Historians won't tell you that. They don't want you to know that he died at 4:20. But I'll tell you. I'm a beacon of truth.

Also, by the way, he died of fucking pneumonia. And I'm not judging him for dying of pneumonia, I almost died of pneumonia, but i am ABSOLUTELY judging him for GETTING pneumonia. He got pneumonia from being outside in the rain repeatedly and refusing to go inside or take shelter. I got it from the same thing but I was like TEN YEARS OLD AND IT WAS HALLOWEEN, and he was a GROWN MAN WHO JUST NEEDED AN OUNCE OF COMMON SENSE. So, anyway, yeah, he's fucking dead.

this last half of his life is very rushed, I admit, but things should go a bit better with the last person on our list here. Which, by the way, prepare your ass for that. He's rapidly approaching.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

HII GM!!! i hope u had good worming time ehehe :3 anyway. now that you've spent some time w/ the undersiders & met a lot of the brockton bay wards & some of new wave + the prt!! i wanna hear ur thoughts on them in general + the world so far if u have any!! & also ur thoughts on like.... how powers happen & brian and taylor's origin stories etc if thats also something you've been thinking abt!! eyes emoji eyes emoji..

i am having SO much fun w worm. physically making myself put down my phone and walk away so i stop reading and do the productive things i promised myself i would do this weekend.

I AM SO. WARY. OF THE WARDS. I DONT TRUST THEM. its rlly cool 2 me that they all have powers that i myself would consider like. Bad or Scary. the emotion manipulation thing, the literal warping of time and space etc those are all things that i would be like. this feels overpowered to the point that i almost expect it more from a villain character to build dramatic tension. which. i guess in the meta sense still works bc theyre being set up as antagonists rn but you know what i mean!!!!!

i fully think we've reached the point where taylor is in way too deep to the extent that changing anything now would end horribly bad for her on both sides. shes still holding onto this thought that shes gonna have this dramatic reveal where she puts the villains in jail and the heroes welcome her with open arms. but after that conversation with armsmaster thats just !!!!!!! not going to fucking happen!!! it doesnt work like that!!! also there keep being these little sidebars and moments where she admits to herself that shes excited about villain work or like..a chance to hang out with her new friends. girl you are not going to join the protectorate i can see right thriugh your dumbass.

<< side note on all of this i have a little bit of a theory for this. i think tattletale probably. knows. she joined with the intention of betraying them eventually. im still sort offff kind of unclear as to the extent of lisas powers and how they work but at this point i dont know how she couldve possibly missed that huge elephant other than the possibility that she is intentionally ignoring it.

ANYWAY. IVE STRAYED FROM YOUR ACTUAL QUESTION IM SORRY I JUST LIKE THE UNDERSIDERS A LOT. i have a lot of thoughts on the meta of the story and the role reversal of "villains good heroes bad" that i know some cape media does sometimes and im not exactly sure jf thats what worm is going for but i AM AWARE OF IT . and i think that is playing a little bit of why i am biased like this. but this is not to say i dont like the heroes i wan 2 know everything about them. however i dont trust them. SUPER interested in what Amy's got going on w her dad and the fact that she fucking turned off taylors powers????? despite saying she wasnt gonna mess with brain stuff?????? i think amys gonna get rlly fucked up about something pretty soon. i could see her snapping and turning into some crazy supervillain esp in the last interlude where she talked about how much pressure she and others put on herself w healing everything and everyone.

uhhhhhhh what else. hey powers coming from trauma is pretty fucked up huh!!!!! u know whats rlly funny is like. i sort of expected it to be somethinf bad like that but i was also wasnt expecting the angle that like. the powers are unrelated to whatever the event was??????? like im sure u could find ways to connect each of their powers to their trigger event but its not ljke. obvious ?? i guess?? like taylor wasnt bittem by a radioactive bug that gave her bug controlling powers u know??? im rlly rlly excited 2 learn abt more characters trogger events just to like. expand the data pool and see if yhere is a correlation between the power that they get and the event that happens. or if the power theyre born with the potential of having is just set in stone or whatever. does that makr ANY sense

[cerealmonster15]

ok twst sims update from when i was playing last night, continuation of my blabbing here lol + some DOODLES about it

opens discord dms...

ok so i think i literally was planning on just going to my heartslabyul household and organizing their garden a little but i did not end up doing that at all, bc i immediately got distracted by i guess the new(? idk when they implemented it) 'event' system in sims 4 in real time where theres like, weekly goals for shit you can unlock? anyway this one was about the grim reaper and i wanted to unlock the reaper scythe earring for my diasomnia boys [i unlocked it and then forgot to give it to them lol]

but i had tasks to do! including asking some sims about ambrosia. this is what silver had to say about it

hes really excited about necromancy or whatever i guess

i did complete this week's tasks for the event thing but i immediately got distracted in the middle of it because i forgot that i'd ALSO toggled recently the story progression for relationships, as i mentioned in the other post i linked. so i see this stuff

and im like. when did sebek start dating jamil. when did silver start dating cater. why do they look like Hell [they had just come home from work and were Exhausted lol]

so i've been sleuthing around trying to find other relationships that have spawned [i cant always remember if it's something i did or if it happened on its own lol] and like i checked beloved son juice spade, where i could see i had been working on forming the first year's polycule with him last time i played- but also. chenya was there.

meanwhile ACE had formed no new romances but he DID form HATER BEEF with ORTHO FOR SOME REASON SKDJHKGSJD

[sorry ortho literally doesnt look like ortho LOL i dont use CC and i believe i didnt have the option to make kids hair blue]

one day ill learn how 2 draw chenya but NOT TODAY IM BUSY SOWWY KING

trey also had started a strong romance with floyd,,, and like i think i had him start something with jade a while ago but never maintained it / a while ago before i got a certain mod to help w/this, there used to be a lot of relationship decay bc i had trouble keeping up w/all the different households lol so i think jade and trey just hadnt gotten much attention but they look so funny in treys relationship slots

i think when the game does it by itself it just slots them as partners immediately so like im assuming it's treating floyd and trey as partners, idr exactly, but this just looks like trey and jade are best friends w/some budding romantic tension, and then floyd just walked up to trey and was like hey wanna go smash our faces together KLFHSLKDJGKL. godspeed trey good luck w/whatever that is

and then cater and trey have a romantic bond but i guess hadnt actually kissed yet so i decided to move them along so they could be an Official Couple but like.

right after they kissed, caters son walked up and was Not Having It kfsdhlkJFDSKLJKLG

anyway we got the item that let us summon the grim reaper

i tried so hard to get cater to hook up with him but sims 4 said NO FUN ALLOWED THIS TIME >:'(

thats ok tho he can just be an ace aro king and we can be besties instead :] it's also really funny seeing The Grim Reaper respond to social interactions like an average sim ksdlghkljf

ANYWAY,

chenya was scared of him. but also still dressed for the pool. and thinking about flirting with trey fdjksjfgklsd deuce was also scared of the grim reaper bc my poor boy is like constantly Haunted. i think he has three fears now and i dont know how to Help Him

i jumped around a bit more and found rook and jade have a romance and i truly dont remember if i did that or if the game did it kfdsjfkljsd but i DO like jade/rook so theres a good chance It Was Me, but i have no memory of it kfdsjklfs.

vil also has beef with jamil and azul

but thats been there for a lil while and i think i remember seeing it sometime after i was playing jamil or azul and they were on a date at a convenience store that vil was Also At, and vil was 🧍 standing like right in the midst of them so i think it did that thing where he inserted himself into a group convo with them and then got mad that they were flirting, bc i think sims usually get mad when 2 are flirting within a 3+ convo LOL

hes in his crumplebottom era. no pda in my lobby.

i had idia hit on cater by bragging about his gamer skills

then i found out idia also had a game-spawned romance with none other than

KALIM JSKFJSDLKJKFLKSD despite the fact that he was like actively currently annoyed by CHEERY PEOPLE [i think bc rook was there and i have him as cheerful lol]

idia voice wow all these bubbly extroverts suck wheres my boyfriend kalim al asim kJFLDSJFD

ok almost done now we're back at silver and cater again where kfdljsfkljs silver was still Yearning so i had him invite cater over to try and clear the wish to Smooch Boyfriend but like. i could NOT get the make out option to appear and thats specifically the one he'd rolled for so i was trying to spam romance w/them and it was like

i had them do their first kiss. then cater auto kissed silvers cheek and it was cute!

[i'd also given silver a small makeover lol]

then i saw shortly after the convo turned to very awkward and i was like huh why, theyre having positive reactions, theyre both flirty still, what- LILIA?!?!?!?!

dad walks up from behind them and is like ARE YA WINNIN SON??? so i got him the hell out of there klsdjflk he was embarrassing his son.... then as soon as he was out it swapped back to romantic interactions lol but i still couldnt get make out to appear. but u know what did if you saw the other post where i talked about this

silver nearly instantly had the option to propose to cater but he coudlnt bc their friendship is BARELY ANYTHING [you can see it peeking out on the right over there lol] so like. flash fire romance of them spawning something, me spamming romance interactions to try and fulfill the want, and no friendship progression fdksjgkldf

anyway then they all went to work can cater just kinda hung out in the kitchen w/their broken stove

OKAY THAT'S ALL FOR NOW BYE!!!

[astranauticus]

post mortem for my orv animatic bc i have lots of thoughts and yall are gonna hear all of them (that is a threat)

first is the obligatory special thanks/plagiarism declaration section but a lot of the shots in this are inspired by the original changgwi lyric video which like. please watch it there's a reason this song is a classic animatic song on bilibili like the music is good but the video definitely helped. also speaking of bilibili, special shoutout to this arknights chongyue animatic that introduced me to the song that will haunt the next 8 months of my life!

the original inspiration was the thought that the verse of the spirit telling the story of its own death felt very yjh coded but it took like another week of stewing on it to have the idea of using the final chorus for the dkos arc which was the moment i decided i have to actually make this thing

going strictly by when i started putting pen to paper (pencil to ipad screen? whatever) this took almost exactly 5 months since i created the first drafts in february but the first 3 months ish from february until may were also my school semester so. most of the progress (id say about >60%) was done in the last two months of me working on this every moment i wasnt at work (or playing project sekai, for some reason)

also! funny little detail but counting the drafts and some discarded frames my procreate stack for this thing has exactly 49 artworks in it! neat little easter egg i guess (yeah 51 wouldve been more fitting but whatever)

this fully slipped by both me (at 2am) and my friend whom i sent the finished version to (fighting the flu) but in the final edit i didn't actually include the second half of the last lyric?? it's 'i will take you to the mountain god' i apparently just wrote 'i will take you' and never finished the rest LMAO

speaking of the lyrics i dont speak korean and im not a huge fan of most english translations of this song that exists so on multiple occasions i was so tempted to just use the chinese cover someone on bilibili did because then i'd at least be confident i know where the fucking line breaks were (there's one line at the end where im pretty sure i didn't edit on the line breaks correctly but that was more of an intentional compromise because the timings would've been off otherwise. anyway) tbh the only reason i didnt do that is the atmosphere and delivery of the original song is. really unbeatable like the cover's also pretty good but it doesn't quite achieve the same effect

also speaking of things i fucked up im aware i drew sys in the wrong outfit for the dkos fight but like. ok full disclosure my orv reference folder is a complete mess (theres like 400+ images in there. for some reason) so on net ive gotten character outfits wrong while working on this thing like at least 3 times bc id just grab a random webtoon screenshot from my folder and go w it. it's just that by the time i realised i fucked up i'd already finished drawing all of sys's frames and i was too lazy to go back and change all of them LMAO

anyway yeah some other random things i wanted to whinge about:

there's a lot of effects i wanted to do that didn't quite come across due to. lack of skill/time/patience/all of the above but the one im really annoyed about is the yhk postchorus bit with the 3 circles bc. first off i think i drew those while halfway dozing off on the train to school once because uh. yeah

anyway poor drawing aside id really wanted to recreate the sort of. drawn-in effect on the circles and lines that the original lyric video had but i could NOT for the life of me figure out a way to execute that in capcut so. here we are (also you cant put transitions on overlays in capcut so that's why those also looked so bad. youre welcome)

honestly my timeline for this in capcut looks pretty ridiculous bc if you want to do word by word animations/effects you need to pay for the pro version so my workaround was just to have like five thousand text layers with 1-2 words on it each (do not recommend btw)

speaking of the text im a moron so i kinda forgot to account for the text when drawing frames and wow you can tell. yeah next time im just hand writing the text fuck this

and i have some more thoughts that are. mild to moderate webtoon spoilers so past this will be the spoiler warning line

__________________________________________________________

actually my original plan was to upload this the day dkos dies in the webtoon but a. i genuinely did think it was gonna be yesterday like i dont pay for the early access episodes so i was just kinda going off orvtwt LMAO b. i could feel myself burning out on this like the last few frames i drew for this were fucking dogshit so i figured either i finish it soon or i wont finish it at all

i will probably still draw something for dkos' death day though for those who celebrate (basically when i was thumbnailing for one of the frames in this i ended up with one that didnt fit the video aspect ratio at all but still looks pretty good so im promoting it to a full drawing. so look forward to that)

like for an idea of how fucking sick of this shit i was by like. last week pretty much like for the last few frames of the dkos fight i straight up forgot to draw dkos' wings and had to add them in halfway through editing last night. like that's how fucking out of it i was by then lmaoo

looking back its actually kinda funny cuz the whole put this up when dkos dies thing was my plan since february but i had literally no way of knowing when that would be especially since the webtoon stopped going with the novel chapter numbers exactly (i could.. guesstimate but my original estimation was in june so yknow. real useful) but like i can find evidence of me panicking about that deadline since may. why did i do that

given that deadline i knew i cant really include stuff from the novel past the dkos arc but man. the amount of times i wanted to use something from later (ESPECIALLY 1863 arc). i actually have another idea i want to test out thats like full epilogue spoilers partially because working on this for so long made me realise i really want to make more epilogue content <- what

yknow how i mentioned discarded frames yeah i had to draw dkos' death 3 times because the first two compositions just never quite panned out. i mean the current one is also pretty unreadable with the colour scheme but trust me the previous ones were way worse christ alive

[causenessus]

GOOD MORNING NESS!! <3 i hope you have a good dayy :) the brown and green additions to the blog are so cute omg😋 it looks super cute!

i have picture day in a couple hours im literally tweaking out.. it's probably gonna be fine tho but THEY ALWAYS MAKE ME LOOK LIKE AN EGG TOO like they'll tell me "okay push back your hair a bit, brush your bangs to the side..." girl the bangs are the only thing keeping me from looking like a helipad NO NO NO GET AWAY 🤺 so yeah im here in my bedroom stressing about what to do w my hair and what to wear as i lay in bed, actively avoiding doing anything ☺️

ALSO AFTER YOU SAID A BIT ABOUT THAT PLAY I HONESTLY WANTED TO HEAR MORE?? like you accidentally BIT your phone and cut your finger? 😨 what else happened during that play??😭 AND ALSO kinda gave me flashbacks to being a theater kid when i was in elementary bc i would always do plays and musicals EVEN OUTSIDE OF SCHOOL i was a little nerd LMAOAOA but those plays were soooo much fun and in one of them i even got to wear a big poofy dress that was such a vibe... (no it wasn't i was so overstimulated after a while BUT THE DRESS WAS CUTE) i should go back to theater (no i shouldn't)

ANYWAY I HOPE YOUR SCHOOL DAY GOES WELL AND YOUR WORK (if you have it today, idk 💔)!! HOPEFULLY WE CAN TALK MORE LATER TODAY! MAKE SURE YOU EAT AND DRINK WATER AND DONT FORGET TO TAKE YOUR MEDS‼️

THANK YOU SO MUCH SAV!!! I MAY LIKE TAKE A SCREENSHOT OF IT TO MAKE IT LIKE A DIVIDER IMAGE YK </33 bc it looks perfect at least on my phone screeen and i think it's cute on my computer screen too!! but ik it's not like completely centered and everything if that makes sense 😭

NOT THE HELIPAD 💀💀 I HOPE YOUR PICTURE DAY WENT WELL LOVE!! LMK HOW IT WENT!! i remember there was one time my picture was so bad I COULD NOT HANDLE IT like literally could not tolerate it it was that bad i actually went in for like picture retakes bc usually like i don't care that much BUT THAT ONE WAS SO BAD 💀

AND OMG YES LET ME TELL YOU THE STORY so i've talked about this play a lot on here i think!! it was the one where my director got really mad and yelled at people backstage and the asm back there put his headset mic down so we could be nosy and listen in LMAO (while we were all hiding in the booth and then got jumpscared when his bald whiny head appeared outside the window) etc. it was that show!!! so also what happened was that bc i'm a little catwalk monkey lights kid freak i was always up there or asked to go up there to help with things!! and sometimes i have to do not osha safe things like climb on the batons!! (allow me to find a picture for reference)

OKAY I ALMOST COULDN'T FIND A PIC BUT THEN I FOUND EXACTLY WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR (i'm going to guess my school is just especially unsafe LMAO like when our theatre was constructed it was NOT done right we have so many violations and like not all of our channels work...some of them are double channeled...etc SORRY THIS IS ME RANTING DW ABOUT FOLLOWING ALONG)

OKAY SO ANYWAY IF U SEE HOW LIKE THESE "BATONS" ARE JUST THESE METAL RODS LITERALLY JUST SECURED BY CHAINS??? WE HAD A BUNCH OF THESE ON OUR CATWALKS (so not all of them had these curtains on them!!) and sometimes we'd have to hang lights on ones that were far out (like not easily accesible) so what i would have to do is climb over the railing of our catwalks and step onto these little tiny poles and basically sit on two of them (yes there was a lot of space between these batons. that's why it was not safe and not a job we trusted a lot of people to do. yes my director forced me to try and wear a harness my last year of hs [after an entire year of not wearing a harness doing this stuff] and no he did not succeed or actually care that much [so i basically never wore a harness risking my life LMAO]) BUT ANYWAY so basically during this show i needed to go out onto these batons to hang a light!! but i was just thinking about where i wanted to put the light and everything and i needed to hold my phone!! so instead of putting it in my pockets or on the floor like a normal person i held it in my mouth!! which i had done multiple times but apparently this time i bit it a bit too hard and so the screen broke and would no longer register touch!! a wonderful time honestly!!! and so then i had go back to my super ancient phone bc i didn't feel like trying to get the screen fixed and didn't even know if it was worth it but that phone was always on its last life and started giving out this summer so then i finally got it repaired yay!!! (AND ALSO FOR REFERENCE old phones were built different yk. like my old phone, the show right after this play where i bit and broke this other phone yk, i accidentally dropped this old phone from the catwalks bc my hands were really shaky one day and it SURVIVED LMAO)

tw for blood ofc!! so about my finger!! so also during this show!! in the catwalks we hung up a little curtain that reached like halfway to the ground or so so that we could project cute little patterns onto the curtain (this was a horror show btw. very cutesy. very demure.) but after we did the show, i was sent up there to take the curtain down, well that curtain had been a BEAST to hang in the first place like it had taken i think two separate groups over the course of two weeks to get that thing secure so like there was wire wrapped around one of the catwalk bars a thousand times PLUS there was tape all around all that wire so i'm like tearing through this all trying to get the wire undone but then it cut me!! :( so my thumb started bleeding and so one of my kids kept a blood covered wire (my blood ofc) as a souvenir and i left my bloody thumbprint on that bar :)) and then i think we literally just put like spike tape around my cut it was a crazy day but that happens often!! i remember moving a bed once and then i was like "EW WHY IS THE BED WET" but it was actually bc my finger!! was once again bleeding 😭 I HAVE TONS OF CRAZY STORIES ASK ME ANYTIME ABOUT THEM!!

AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A LOVELY DAY SAV!! MAKE SURE YOU TAKE YOUR MEDS AND EAT PROPERLY AND DRINK ENOUGH WATER ILYSM!!!! TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF OR I'LL HAVE TO POP OUT OF YOUR SCREEN AND DO IT FOR YOU!!

[mindthedocent]

6, 16 and 17 :333333

omg eden hiiii edennnnn :333

6. the word that appears the most in your current draft (wordcounter.net can tell you)

I'm fucking embarrassed that my most used word is "MIN" and my second-most-used word is "RYAN" and my third-most-used-word is "MIN'S" and my fourth-most-used word is "LIKE"

so idk what you want man. i write at an 11th grade level according to this website LOL

16. favorite place to write

in a word doc DUHHH

no uhh i havent written in a while (basically since getting the new job) but it Used to be, at the desk at work while i was supposed to be standing and running around and working haha,

i also like writing in bed on my phone, and on the couch on my phone :3 is the computer better? absolutely. do i pull it out ever? no <3 <-guy who is on their computer right now hence the lack of emotes

17hold on post paused why did it do this

anyway 17. talk about your writing and editing process

so ive definitely talked about this before! but each part is difficult in its own way i think. if im not feral about a story its gonna take me a long time to write. but when i AM writing, i have to make an effort to set aside time to do so. i usually will try to aim for like, 100 words when ive made a decision to write. but sometimes its just a sentence! and thats okay, it happens! im glad to get something down when the going gets tough. but yeah what happens a lot is that as it goes on i get less excited about writing it and i have to really push to get it finished. i DO like finishing fics guys i PROMISE.

once its done i let it sit for between a week and a month. i dont look at it. i dont even Think about it (try not to anyway, lol). once ive decided that its editing time, i read through it again. this first time is not Really the time for spelling and grammar, but i do correct those things as i see them anyway. no the first read is for flow. do i need to add more detail? did a scene drag on too long? did a story feel too short?

(fun fact, in committing to the bit, i reread through it when i thought it was done and felt pretty bad about my contributions to it and felt like id have to go through a rewrite, complained to my cowriter about it, fell asleep, woke up to them giving me a lot of positive feedback, reread it again, and then added in a couple short scenes. and that fixed it.) (points to whoever can guess which parts i added in last)

uhhh and then after reading for overall flow, ill let it sit again for another few days, and repeat the process. if it feels good, ill go back in and read for smaller things. spelling, grammar, awkward sentences. let it sit again, read it again. once it feels upwards of 85% good to me, i decide im done.

WHEW. its a lot of letting it stew and rereading it. i think thats what it takes sometimes. that, and letting it be imperfect. its never gonna be Perfect, but there comes a point where its gotta be Done, u know? u know exactly what im talking about

thank uuuu for this ask ily!

the quastions

[suffarustuffaru]

✨

Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

AA this is the last fic writer ask question fr :o again it took me a while to get to all of them pfft but i appreciate them a lot!! this question especially is really sweet wkdndn but yes!! and hope anyone reading my answers to these questions found it interesting at least pfft

hmm…. compliment….. im a MAJOR stickler for detail :O i literally cant turn my brain off i have to get EVERY detail i can right whenever possible wjdnd. not that im always right bc im very much not but i try very hard to be!! and i absolutely adore trying to put a lot of detail and nuance into things in my work esp since i focus on characters mental thought process so much hah. i try very hard to do a lot (or at least i consider it a lot widjdj) of research :o for example i wanted to write astrea fic so i devoured every heinkel and reinhard related side story possible and now they give me intense brainrot. cries. since i write a lot of character study i HAVE to look at everything possible before i finish a fic or ill cry inside if i miss one (1) detail i couldve taken into account hah. so i do think im a hard working writer :o !! analyzing things for fun especially when i admire a work of fiction runs in my blood wjdnd it just Happens. i try my best!!

as for um. that one crack treated seriously gluttony if fic i did once (selfcest…). is it accurate to who gluttonybaru is as a character? no in the sense that hes written purposefully in that fic to be like. pushed to his Most Extreme. but also i did try to at least be kind of accurate bc. i combed through SO MUCH of arc 6 and the gluttony if to write him fr 😭😭 there was TOO MUCH analysis in that fic thats why its got a novel length wordcount HAH. hes always had a hate love relationship with “natsuki subaru”….

uhhh uhhh oh yeah something else vaguely related to this that just came to mind—for example my multichap pride otto fic has me like really wracking my brain bc pride otto has screentime for exactly 0.2 seconds (im totally good at math) so its like. i wanted to like analyze how he most likely thinks and what sort of behaviors he has and how hed even react in All the new shenanigans im putting him in. but im also working off of 0.2 seconds of screentime so i had to also go and look at how main otto thinks and try to make Many Educated Guesses on how otto goes from point a (main otto pre-meeting subaru) to point b (the otto we see in pride if). which is something i do every time i focus on an if character in general anyway HAH bc i think it gets easier to understand if versions of characters, no matter how different they seem from their main route selves, once you examine who their base character is and THEN you look at the if events and how its warped them away from their base character. if that makes sense. i think its really fun hah.

i also recognize though that it wouldve been maybe Easier to make pride otto in my fic a little more. dead inside. empty. bc i know that ive been writing a lot of his anger and irritation hah. and it wouldve made sense for him to be a little more tired kind of dead inside in his internal dialogue!!! but i figured that i might as well go a little differently with it to yes maybe subvert expectations a little bit (and bc. ok after arc 8 Confirming Many Things About Otto, no way pride otto wasnt angry at some point. fr.) but also bc. you know when a person whos been in a traumatic situation they couldnt escape for so long is forced to change themselves to survive? if that person manages to finally escape its like. now they gotta try and unlearn any trauma related lessons theyve learned now that the danger is over bc what helped them survive is now maladaptive bc the danger is Over. thats kind of how i approached the fic fr T^T but also i try so hard to write pride otto as the jaded ass he definitely is. theres so much jades in him for sure. (this sentence totally makes sense.)

oh!!! uh uh one small detail with pride otto—when characters have titles, he will almost Always call them by their title in both internal and external dialogue. reinhard is sword saint and julius is the greatest/finest knight and felix is blue, etc etc. otto is well. 1. emotionally constipated 2. distant from others 3. Going Out of His Way to distance himself from others 4. hes very fixated on power and hierarchy and 5. he is Very aware of the role hes played in crushing each knight in the knight trio. main otto Absolutely feels guilt even as hes being ruthless. i figured pride otto likely at least Used to feel guilty. if hes not still guilty deep down.

[theoriginalnikegirl]

In light of a recent conversation and the fact im rewatching once upon a time, im revisiting my opinion re: hating Elfangor thinking especially of the last two interactions Tobias has interacting with the idea of Elfangor in the series.

To lay it out, Tobias has a total of three interactions with Elfangor in the series: meeting him in book 1, having his will read in 23, and a hallucination in 43. I've tended to take to the hallucination as real-ish, real-like, since Tobias has so few interactions with his father and I've long hated the implications of that interaction. Duringst the recent conversation however, I argued myself into thinking it was wholly Tobias' subconscious. Basically what happens in that interaction (why I hate it) is it boils down to a hallucination of Elfangor telling Tobias to suck it up. Tobias has just been tortured for a hundred pages, and here is an image of his absent father saying: "yeah too bad, now suck it up. Get over it. You shouldn't feel as hurt as you do and you shouldn't go and make it anyone else's problem". It's dressed up in prettier language but that's the sentiment. Now I, as the reader, don't really know Elfangor that well. I don't know if he would say that to Tobias. I do know Tobias though and I know that Tobias would absolutely say that to himself

I'm also revisiting the reading of the will in 23 which I have always appreciated. I appreciated that in that will Elfangor said: I wanted to love you. Not that he did, but that he wanted to. I have long had a bit of stick up my ass thinking it's too little to say he wished he hadn't abandoned Tobias' because the fact of the matter is Tobias was abandoned whether Elfangor wanted to or not, but I am also rewatching once upon a time.

For those not in the know, once upon a time is a tv show about fairy tale characters processing generational trauma, and how that trauma follows the generations even as each new generation tries so hard to avoid the mistakes of their parents, to the point where several generations literally abandon their children hoping that will break the cycle of generational trauma (it works exactly once) Anyway long story short Neal, a character who at this point has pretty much processed the trauma his father had inflicted on him (good job btw) just died while his own son (Henry) had completely forgotten him due to a magic thing and thought he'd merely abandoned him and his mother in jail. In his dying breath, Neal told Emma (Henry's mom) that she didn't need to restore Henry's memory if he was happy without it, if it would cause him more pain to remember his father only knowing he'd died. But he asked her to tell Henry that he'd wanted to be a good father and dammit if that didn't mean something!

The crucial difference here between Elfangor and Neal is that Neal explicitly doesn't put responsibility onto Henry in exchange for his wanting to be a good father (if it would hurt him more to remember, he shouldn't) while Elfangor does saddle Tobias with a) fighting the war that he couldn't anymore and b) there's the fact that Elfangor's will was only read to Tobias to motivate him to continue to fight that war. Which is on the Ellimist but what else did Elfangor think it was gonna do when he wrote it??

Point is I am on better terms with Elfangor now but out of the two of them Neal is the better dad.

[i-write-unrealunearth]

Eat your young, Son of Nyx.

26/12/2023

Eat your young

Eat your young

But what if I dont fucking want to???

Eat your young

Eat your young

Can you just shut up for a moment? Im trying to think!

Eat your young

Eat your young

Eat your Young

Eat your Young

Eat your Young, so-

YOURE NOT MY FUCKING FATHER

...

...

Eat your young, son of Nyx

And now you added more bullshit to the mix, just like I thought you would? Yup, yeah, exactly like I thought, one hundred percent got it right. When i last decepated your freaking penis I thought it would be enough to stop you from going around like ya always did, fucking and fucking every single living entity with holes that you find. You know, I always listened to Aunt Geia's stories about you. You might have been thinking i was "too young to understand" or some other bullshit you tell yourself in order to fall asleep at night, but Aunt Geia knew i was listening very closely to every word she said just by the look in my eyes. Always heard about the myth that "eyes are the gateway for the soul" and then i would think, well, as a titan, i do not have a soul cuz that shit is for humans 👍 that was until my gaze ever so distant met my aunt's and there, on her eyes, I could see my own eyes. My. Own. Fucking. Soul. Aunt Geia is magical like that. You would fucking know because you're too busy telling me to EAT MY YOUNG, DAD.

...

...

Oh, finally. You shut the fuck up. Now I can think straight.

Okay yea haha i forgot i cant think straight

cuz im gay lol

badumtissss

im so funny oh my

anyways

Eat you Young, Son of Nyx.

and youre back

great!

what ya wanna hear now? ill tell you the best bedside story, the best lullaby, to see if you fucking fall asleep and never wake up again.

...

oh! I got a perfect one in my!

once there was a boy name kronos

son of the sky and

well that doesnt matter

what matter is that

when the father of kronos went to sleep

which was so so very quick because he was a snorer

a very loud one

the loudest one

that

ever

existed

kronos would take off

and go down to his Aunt's

to go to sleep w her instead

sigh

I couldn't sleep with you bc i literally couldn't sleep next to you, dad.

Aunt Geia actually cared to make me go fall asleep

She tried everything

the tremors of earthquakes

the silence of the forest

nothing worked

until she looked into my eyes

and i looked at hers back

and I just knew

so i asked her to sing me a lullaby

or tell me a bedside story

it didnt matter honestly

her voice calms me down

always did

so i

fell asleep for the first time in months.

thats why i kept coming back to Hers, dad. More to deal w me than w you.

...

...

Eat your Young, son of Nyx.

sigh

what else ya wanna hear about, dad? im an open book. always have been. you just never cared enough to ask and listen, i guess. Aunt Geia did.

I miss her.

Eat your Young

I really really do miss her.

Eat your Young.

I miss how Her voice could calm me dow-

...

...

...

Eat my Young?

Eat your Young.

Can I go double check with you?

...

...

...

snorts

Great.

Like old times then.

See you in a bit, Auntie.

[tonydaddingham]

hope you're good!!!✨ i did get your first one but no matter! very good thanks! you? oh well. i've lost a few emails to the connection in the last few days so i figured just in case.

also thank you re: the amv, haha!!! i ended up doing another using The Darkness, but your suggestion of using Original Sin is inspired, ive put it on the list!!! as for being on the nose... well, i did one to lewis capaldi's heavenly kind of state of mind, so make of that what you will! you're welcome! it really is fantastic! (as are your others; i'm looking forward to the abba one.) lol true about heavenly kind of state of mind and original sin is just such a good song.

i completely agree with your remarks on the implications of god... feels incongruous with other aspects of god's characterisation or indeed the theme of the story - to my interpretation, anyway. yes to this entire paragraph. absolutely celebrate everyone writing whatever they want and god getting increasingly frustrated as increasingly ludicrous fanfic like matchmaking schemes keep failing is potentially hilarious but in my opinion it doesn't work with god or the story at large for her to be involved in things.

i also love the metaphorical imagery, the poetry, of crowley being the question, and aziraphale being the answer (this sparks narrative analytical joy). oooo yes that is great imagery. i agree that free will has to be the plan and aziraphale and crowley do represent that in a way but i think that might be - from god's perspective not the authorial one - fairly coincidental. like it didn't have to specifically be those two? i don't know. i tend to consider god pretty much entirely a non entity as speculation goes. she narrates and that's it.

whilst that certainly speaks to me as being his behaviour, im not personally convinced that is his motive. i think the motive question might end up going round and round in circles once you start digging into it. where do we exactly put the line between 'god wants' and 'i want' to establish a starting point? i don't think he's trying to undermine her authority. i do think he's trying to take/has already taken over heaven but maybe he thinks that's what god would want him to do. she's not talking so he's just going to have to defer to his own judgement of what god's will is and his own desires are certainly influencing that judgement extensively. to what degree he's aware of this? tricky question if you ask me. i prefer him to be fully aware and nonetheless certain that he's doing the divinely approved good/right thing but that really is just personal preference and you do make a good case for the reverse. might just call it a mix of both and give up on the details before i accidentally talk myself into a paradox.

for me, it's the specific, simplified concept that moral absolutism doesn't exist. noone is completely evil, just as noone is wholly good. good point! this is why i agree that the metatron should think he's doing the right/good thing (even if he fulfills the function of the major villain). i guess i just feel like a bit more self awareness might give him more agency?

it would make sense, to me, for this to extend to metatron this whole paragraph also makes a very good point. i said above that he thinks he's doing the right/good thing but might it be more accurate that he believes he's doing the necessary thing? that he needs to put himself in power and do all these reprehensible things because it's the only way to preserve heaven and with it god's will and the concept of 'goodness'? that could open up a bunch of things around the end justifying the means.

i think both absolutely could be correct, a mix of them - for me, the former being personal against metatron's motive, and the latter against his character. don't have anything to add here i'm afraid; just wanted to say i like this a lot!

his questions, i think again for me it makes for a more compelling character arc that crowley has existed throughout his fall and being a demon as not getting any answers you're probably right here narratively speaking. i got attached to the whole serpent thematic but the more i think about it that does also work with just questions. the serpent only opens up the path to knowledge without directly partaking of it themself after all. and the wrong questions are still dangerous. maybe even more so than the answers.

albeit, i have a feeling that the answer will essentially be that there are no answers, and it's 'up to each of you to find your own ones' oh yeah. definitely.

thoughts [about the demons]? hmmm. i'm inclined to say seeing more demons asking questions is just because we're seeing more demons now. not to mention hastur and ligur were fairly major antagonists (and i'm not yet convinced hastur isn't coming back!). it's the same as muriel to me. just because heaven and hell are absolutely terrible it doesn't mean all angels and demons are so we're now getting nicer characters on both sides to show this and balance out each side's antagonists. as for why the short-staffing: i like the idea that demons are just defecting but i think maybe something's wrong in hell? shax tells crowley beelzebub 'put some of the lesser demons on half rations'. this is a new aka post armageddon development so presumably pre armageddon hell had enough resources for everyone to be getting full rations. now there's less demons around than before but less resources per demon. of course i'm assuming that the half rations is because of lack of resources and not some other reason like punishment but I don't think that's an unreasonable assumption to make: when eric keep interrupting to draw attention to the lack of demons he also points out that they won't be able to take the large transporter which seems like a resources issue as well. it's almost like something's draining hell. i haven't the foggiest how or what or why but i'm pretty sure it'll matter next season.

i meant 'conclusive' haha!!! ah ok. that makes a lot more sense then and in that case i agree. the archangels aren't innocent but they're not as bad as the metatron either.

but the bottom line - as i see it - for them is to preserve heaven. we can view their actions as deplorable, and that is true, but in their unique circumstances, what other action would, could, or should they have taken? i refer back to my thoughts above on moral absolutism and its place - if it has any - in GO and its characters. yep! it's very likely the archangels think what they're doing - including the things they do to maintain their power (and they infight and try to exercise power over each other but they always present a united front to other angels) - are necessary. though as i said in ny last ask i'm not sure that doesn't make them more dangerous. righteousness is, shall we say, not good.

re: memory of their time as angels, this is where i largely fluctuate on how much i subscribe to the memory wipe theory - but i don't think it's a full wipe, but potentially partial? oof. yeah there's something happening with memory but the details?

but i think perhaps that the memory wipe is attributable more to the BOL than to the metatron himself - i do think there's potentially a link between falling/erasure of grace and divinity, and to memories of being an angel gabriel though. he was going to have his memory erased - depending on whether putting it in the fly was just backup or full removal, did - while staying an angel. i feel like tht might counter the fall/memory loss connection.

as for demons not being aware of a wider issue, that's a fair point - but do demons really talk to each other? wouldn't that indicate a weakness, vulnerability? if there is a large-scale memory problem going on, which is a very tentative thought anyway, im not sure that any of the demons would in fact talk to others about it. true and why i didn't discount the collateral damage option after the first season. though if it happened to everyone it might have been acknowledged in company policy? just another part of falling. like i said i really think it might be something that happened only to crowley because of whatever specific role he played and not a large scale operation. if we can trust his drunken ramble he still remembers the act of falling itself just not what led up to it and that i would tentatively hazard the other demons do based on what we see and hear from them. p.s. this doesn't really properly fit into my speculation but i still wanted to say it: 'we are the fallen. never forget that.' 'it's not the kind of thing you forget.' gains a certain kind of irony if there's as many holes in crowley's memory as i suspect.

i have my #halo theory wherein i wonder if aziraphale was the specific angel to actually declare the war in heaven ok that is a very interesting idea for parallels and mirroring. first he declares the war in heaven, then he introduces war to humanity and finally he declares war in hell defending the bookshop in episode six. rule of three. *pauses* oh shit. and hereby i just found a narrative argument for having the scapegoat theory apply to both pre fall and present day crowley. awcw get scapegoated for the fall, the serpent of eden gets scapegoated for the fall of man and crowley gets scapegoated for whatever happens with the second coming/the still unresolved declaration of war on hell. rule of three. that of course would set them up for not only mirroring/paralleling their own story arcs but also as counterpoints to each other. ok this possibility fascinates me. might need to think on it more and then get back to you about it later! and then of course there's the characterisation element of carrying the weight of that kind of guilt around, which is plenty interesting in its own right, not to mention could add another layer to him accepting the metatron's offer.

i absolutely love your interpretation of crowley's inner conflict, i think that's so well put, and i like it a lot!!! i certainly don't think crowley is willfully ignorant or in denial of his potential part in his own - or the wider - fall, but perhaps just doesn't want to examine or confront it, as you said... or perhaps doesn't remember altogether, and has just cobbled together why he thinks he fell. firstly, thanks! i tend to the latter option, but think the internal conflict/fear of finding himself to be evil would work with either especially if we lean into the scapegoat theory which does also work with either.

but similarly, i think it's also fair to assess crowley as having some measure of the same mentality as he did before he fell; that he can be quite blinkered, self-assured, and at times quite arrogant. yep! though - without trying to excuse it away - i do wonder how much of it's also a defence mechanism at this point.

and please, please do not think im hating on him - critique of a character does not mean i dislike him or find him reprehensible, i promise; it's quite the opposite honestly!!! no worries, i absolutely do no think that! if that's how my p.s. came across i'm very sorry. absolutely not my intention. i enjoy your analyses so it was just a passing thought i had that it'd probably be interesting to see you discuss an aspect of the story and/or characters you don't talk about as much; i find it usually is when people do. (you can blame the history teacher i had in my last few years of school for that lol. she was big on that sort of thing and i guess it just stuck with me.)

the narrative would still hold and be profound if it were the other way around. just personally i like the idea of him being a heavenly Nobody to becoming a hellish Somebody is rather compelling!!!✨ fair enough. i think there's definitely great things you could do with either so i'm more than happy to just sit back and see where it'll go. 🦭

hey 🦭 anon, lovely!!!✨💕 two gorgeously long and complex asks (second under the cut) - gosh, where to start!!!

okay let's get cracking with the first!!!

the abba one has been placed on hold for the time being (inspiration did not vibe with me for it BUT another is in the works and is actually shaping up to be a Slap so stay tuned!!!)

i agree with you re: metatron, i think his motive is going to be somewhat cyclical, and mutually inclusive - to be motivated in what he determines as 'good' and as decreed by god by lack of any other instruction, and to be in his own selfish or narcissistic interests - can and i think probably will exist simultaneously.

i don't think he necessarily would be unaware of what he's doing, per se, but more that he's convinced that as the voice of god, whatever he thinks and does is sanctified as being god's will (because god hasnt told him otherwise) and is done in the name of preserving heaven - and, by extension, the balance of good and evil. therefore, of course, it must be inherently good.

personally, i don't believe that that would remove any agency from metatron (same as aziraphale who, for all of his questionable decisions, to my mind hasn't lacked agency), even if we would evaluate metatron's actions as being bad or wrong - to him, they truly wouldn't be... but like you said re: necessity, i think metatron would potentially see his actions as necessary, and what is necessary is to uphold the 'good'... so does it therefore remain up to everyone else whether those actions are right or wrong? yes, imo - but it's the context that's key.

i guess the closest i can liken metatron to as a 'villain' type character (and please, mea culpa, im not very imaginative) would be javert from les misérables. the law is created, in his eyes, to uphold justice (good); when that law is broken, he is compelled to mete out that justice (also good). it's not a perfect analogy, and obviously there is compelling context on valjean's part (his parolee papers for time served on a justifiable crime make it impossible for him to start a new life as a free man), but ultimately he broke his parole and the law, and javert, whilst operating in a broken system, is doing what he believes to be the good, right thing.

LOVE your thoughts around hell and the short-staffing/dwindling resource issue. i did some writing around shax a couple of days ago, so in hand with that I'll think on your points a little more, they're excellent ones!!!

re: fall/memory loss - possibly, but i personally don't think so. i did a little bit of speculation around the BOL and saraqael, especially in relation to the trial scene, a while ago - it's probably in my #book of life and #saraqael meta tags, if you wanted a peruse!!! but the batshit thought essentially was: what saraqael has access to, in that scene, was the BOL, and she operates it on behalf of metatron... and did during the fall, too.

re: crowley critique, no no it didn't come across like that at all!!! ive just unfortunately had asks previously where people have questioned whether or not i like him, because ive been quite heavily critical of him, and wondered if i find anything redeemable about him... suffice to say, i feel the need now to ensure that any readers do not think that i dislike him if i point out his more... questionable traits; i just find them way more interesting and compelling in a character than the good ones!!!💕

onto your second ask, and just to clarify - it wasn't my mum, unfortunately!!! (the most insight my mum ever gave on GO was this beauty -

- she gets it).

but regardless!!! first of all, LOVE your speculation and what you've thought out!!! i will honestly need to think on it more before i can come to any kind of conclusion, but i am - and i hope you don't mind - essentially going to use this as a scribble pad for some speculation. some of it is in direct relation to your spec, some is general to the fall/war, and some is just Stuff feeding into it... hope that's okay!!!

could totally see it happening - that AWCW fought on heaven's side, and was made to fall essentially at the last minute/unexpectedly for a reason he doesn't even really know, and had to rationalise after the fact

however, i think that removes, as we've batted back and forth already and in the bit above, a little bit of agency on AWCW's part. i don't think AWCW chose to fall, of course, but i do think that he asked questions/made decisions, and followed through on them/stood by them, that resulted in his becoming a demon, regardless of whether he fell or was pushed

agree that hell can't make angels fall; it doesn't make sense, and i refer back to my thoughts/theory on BOL on this

also hard-agree that, without the memory-wipe theory in play, it doesn't make any sense for AWCW to have answers to dangerous (?) questions, because of the risk he'd pose once fallen. it would make far more sense, like they planned with gabriel, to just simply wipe his memory and demote him to a lesser choir*. so i think that's where, personally, i simply do think that he just didn't get any answers at all

now this all could arguably skew the scapegoat theory, but not necessarily, because the idea that he could have been scapegoated by his own 'friends' still stands, imo

my conclusion at the moment, but it will still require more thought for definite, is that i don't think it will have been the case - i think in a way it would feel a little overcomplicated, and whilst devastating i think would erase some of crowley's accountability for his decisions... not necessarily bad decisions! but decisions nonetheless.

*this has just precipitated the unfortunate thought (unfortunate in that it's gone 1:30am and i need to sleep) that - well, what if that was what was meant to happen to crowley??? same as muriel (we speculate), and same as gabriel, he was initially intended to fall but to a lower rank, with no memories, and instead he legged it? like gabriel did? immediately i can think of multiple reasons as to why i don't think this was the case, but... still interesting to think about.

anyway! this response snowballed a bit and for that please have another apology dance 💃 but let me begin with, pure hypothesis, a rough sequence of events re: the fall:

> AWCW and aziraphale meet, he starts asking questions

> meets lucifer and co, AWCW falls in with their little group that does not consider it bad to ask questions, and maybe he reiterates his 'if i were in charge' thought because he feels comfortable to do so amongst them

> lucifer starts getting bolder, as do his closest cohort, about challenging god, and crowley gets swept up in it, or fully agrees with lucifer and actually fully supports him - and aziraphale knows none of this is going on/nothing about AWCW's association with them

> all comes to a head, god nopes out of the whole thing (free will argument), and when things can't be reconciled, war* is declared (👀 at aziraphale and his halo frisbee)

> war, etc., possible temporary ceasefire or lucifer concedes; all the rebels are brought for their Final Judgement before the metatron and the archangels etc

> lucifer implicates AWCW for leading him astray, that he was the one asking questions, and now lucifer has been corrupted or something, idk, but metatron decides all of them need to go - and yet perhaps a particularly harsh punishment is in fact due for AWCW (so yeah, actually, perhaps it is only crowley that doesnt fully remember heaven? that was his own personal punishment, to not remember parts of his time in heaven/the fall?*)

> initiate::Book Of Life Protocol

*now that im writing it out though, i do wonder if that makes sense, that the war would precede the fall...? i think it would, because it seems like the fallen would, well, fall, as punishment for rebellion, and then go off to plot their revenge etc in hell furfur confirms in ep4 that the war/"dubious battle" indeed came "just before" the fall!!! wahoo!!!

*the thing is... in leviticus, there were two goats - sacrificial goat, and the scapegoat. so this is where, i - in equal conviction which is, to say, shaky at best - also personally hold the thought that AWCW might never have been the scapegoat, and instead aziraphale* potentially was - leaving AWCW to be the sacrificial.

this last thought is slightly tangential, but stick with me:

*we know aziraphale was a cherub during the pre-fall scene, and in eden. that doesn't mean that he stayed a cherub in between these points

i recently added some ramblings to this meta on his ring, which i think is the hallmark of the archangel rank - and the fact he wears his on his opposite hand to the others, and constantly covers it, feels very indicative of some unseen backstory

it also feels that him being on earth is an ostracism, a roundabout punishment by way of being cast out but not falling...

and the thing is that genesis 3:24 (KJV) reads the following:

"So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life."

so if aziraphale, as a singular cherub, was placed in eden, it was after the fall of humanity, after original sin. we only see aziraphale arrive to give adam the sword as they were leaving, not beforehand. and after eden, it's suggested, he was demoted to principality (the angelology is debated i know but im sticking with christian/GO-confirmed combination angelology for the moment)

so it can't, to my mind, be because of the apple business that aziraphale was demoted - it's not as if he let the serpent in (if we follow genesis, he arguably wasnt even there at that point). it could be because he gave away his sword, but a) god knows and let him get away with it, and b) neither gabriel nor the quartermaster knew that he gave it away in s1

so what other reason could it have been? well, the only plausible reason i can think of is that it's because he didn't smite crawley when given the opportunity on the wall

others have debated whether or not it was aziraphale telling AWCW about the stars that led to AWCW's fall, and perhaps in point of fact it was... but im not certain that anyone would have known about it, other than them. maybe aziraphale refused to fight (after knowing that AWCW was amongst the other side?), he refused to wield his archangel power in some way (like gabriel refused?), or he actually defended AWCW (personal favourite)?

idk, but either way, whatever he did, he was punished for it with the demotion to cherub, and then demoted again to principality for not smiting the serpent of eden

instead of AWCW being the scapegoat for the fall, was he sacrificed as an example, to atone for fallen, and aziraphale was scapegoated to atone for the fall of humanity? had the blame of not destroying the serpent of eden placed upon him, and was cast into the wilderness (earth)?

i realise how ridiculous it all sounds, believe me, but my sleepiness is now officially winning so i shall leave it there (honestly 🦭 anon, im so sorry for the unrelated ramble, but it's actually so helpful for me to type this out, it helps with understanding what my own theories even are when i write other stuff... so thank you!!!)✨

[omegamoo]

HELLO OMEGAMOO .looking into your soul with my autistic eyes. can you explain the worldbuilding of wp pretty please. anything abt it i like your rambles and hearing about whittled pantheon

OH MY GOD HI MOSS.. thank u... lets go... under the cut. again. warning. there are some messy bits its not all the way figured out yet. hopefully i got all this right i guess tgm + twig can come correct me haha. and im mostly going to be explaining the failsafes and global worldbuilding here! theres lots of cultural worldbuilding we're working through but thats a lot more specific and less. plot relevant? if that makes sense.

OKAY SO. the first thing u gotta know is that there's a Guy (gender neutral) who creates the universe. the Guy has no role in the story whatsoever hes just the universe creator. and anyways. he creates galaxies and solar systems and also souls. but the souls like. don't behave? they just kinda float around through each solar system and get in the way. so the guy goes well this isn't working and creates shepherds for the souls, one for each solar system. the shepherds lead the souls to the afterlife and oversee like. creation of people getting souls. life and death. in the solar system where the pantheon old world planet is, the soul-herder is Sephtis, god of death, who ends up getting involved with the pantheon and running the shepherding from the wp planet.

also, the Guy creates these entities known as the Carvers, approximately one for each solar system, to go to each of the planets and bring life to them. the Guy hands each Carver two carved wooden & prismarine figures for each planet. these figures are gods, essentially. we call them the failsafes. the Carver is supposed to go to each planet in the solar system, drop off and activate the failsafes using her blood, and then move on to the next one. the failsafes then are like. faux-carvers who will oversee the world.

more on the failsafes - there are two per planet. one is earth-centric and the other is water-centric. so like, the two things humans need to live, if that makes sense. water failsafe controls the water (duh) and the earth failsafe has the ability to open tunnels between planets. this would allow for the carver to travel between planets, especially if something is to go wrong. again, these failsafes (and all other gods) are activated by the blood of a Carver, since the Carvers are like. magic. in the old world, the two failsafes are melior, goddess of aid (she's the earth one) and palaemon (water god. duh). this is why specifically the death of palaemon throws everything so out of balance! in the new world, the only activated failsafe is aides, the earth-centric god of caves. melior gets the gods from the old world to the new world during the catalyst, and aides creates the warren (chaotic system of tunnels more on this in a bit) so that daemon can get back and save iota.

so okay. the reason why the wp planet stands out is because the solar system's Carver is the only one who decides to try and carve her own gods to help humanity. this is how we get the pantheon. she carves and activates morrighan and ludo using her blood. they're supposed to enticehumans to explore and protect humans, but they swipe the prototype carvings of iota and daemon and then fuck off to who knows where. at this point the carver goes "well maybe this isn't working" and activates the first failsafe, melior. iota & daemons carvings are set down in a spot where the carver tripped and skinned her knee which activates them. they convince the carver to carve statikos. and so it goes.

palaemon's figure gets chucked into the ocean. we haven't exactly talked in a while about how this happens. maybe it was the carver maybe ludo tried to activate it and got pissed off and threw it into the ocean. i dont rememebr. but anyways the carver dies and her blood goes down into the ocean and activates palaemon. maey and palaemon r the last gods activated.

so now all of the Carver's duties have been split up amongst the gods alongside her blood. they each carry a bit of her purpose and self. this is why they are able to pass through the tunnel into the new world

in the new world, the gods find that there is no Carver in the new world and no active failsafes, which means there's no way to get iota back. so, they activate the earth-centric failsafe, aides, using their own combined blood since it was originally the blood of the carver. this Works but only kind of. aides isn't a full god, and thus the passageway he creates back to the old world is Fucked.

uhm. okay. i think.... for the present this is it. i could get into like. the mapping of the world or i could get tgm to talk about linguistics and we have a whole calendar system set up and i have so many thoughts about. the night sky. but this is like... what you need to know. about how the world(s) came to be

[gurugirl]

i’ve been meaning to give a mini update but haven’t really got the time so i’m just gonna bulk it up here. yasss if you don’t mind

BASICALLY!

you got mini promo in my critical thinking lecture bc we were learning about Buddhist philosophy and my professor was like yeah these stories usually have a ✨guru ✨ and i was like OMG I KNOW HA! so yeah that whole week you were living rent free in my mind like woah!

and then i started talking to this person, not talking in like a omg this has the potential to be something more bc now that i think about it… i think i might be aromantic or something or it could just be that i have some like unresolved deep rooted subconscious trauma i need to work through to feel comfortable being vulnerable around someone… let alone a MAN ugh. anyways yeah the thing is when i told my roomies that this person may be idk have the intentions of being more than friends i got this feeling my roommate might have feelings for this person so i was like woah i need to back tf off. like to me if they did have feelings i would’ve used it as a way to get my virginity over and done with like GET HER OUT OF HERE! but now i’m setting up that boundary and i tell my roommate like girl you need to do something about this crush and she’s like no no you texted first and i was like GIRL I DONT LIKE THEM! but yeah i’ve hung out with them like twice and yeah im not feeling it at all, call me fucked up but they’re just too nice, it’s like they’re beating around the bush with me and prioritizing my feelings like hello? that’s not how i work, i’m so indecisive don’t put every decision we make on me yk? and they’re also very feminine which i feel really bad about saying bc they’re non-binary/ gender fluid but i tend to be attracted to more masculine/dominant energy (hence why i love your shit hello? 😋)

this is my finals week too and i just had my first final for chemistry and i just know that shit was bad like tell me why i guessed on 3/4 of that exam 😭 and then after i was done i turned on my phone to see messages from my study group saying they’re outside the building to celebrate… EXCUSE ME?! CELEBRATE WHAT EXACTLY?! i flopped. f for fail? more like f for FLOP! but yeah i have a bio exam tmrw and im not feeling it! like whyyyyyy! this is what i get for being a stem major like-

also! i read your new story and OH MY GOD! i love how harry like kinda knew she was reluctant bc of him so he like took the time to play with her a bit! AND I LOVE HOW YOURE BROADENING YOUR WRITING CATALOGUE! like ugh i love your creative growth, going from stories where y/n is submissive to somewhat dominant (stepmom) and then from having a third party being submissive (angel from profrry) to them being a potential dominant figure it’s so exciting! i love how you’re dipping your toes in different writing ponds UGH! i’m so excited to see what’s to come!

Ahh oh my gosh, babe! Love the update and I'm so flattered you were thinking of me during your critical thinking lecture 🤭😇

And I love that you're in stem! I'm so impressed 😍 Love that! Good luck this week to you! I finished my last final today (early) so I'm done until Spring semester starts 🎉

As for this person you've been talking to, yeah it really just sounds like you're not into them, which is fine. If you're not feeling it then that's okay. There has to be some attraction and connection and you just don't have it. They're probably better off just being your friend.

Thank you so much for saying all that about my writing! I really like trying new things so I'm happy you appreciate it 🥰

xoxo