#anyways. i did some writing thats nice
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*saloon doors burst open, i stumble in, eyes wild and frothing at the mouth* hey what if i make bellumbeck a sort of metaphor for linebeck transitioning between just lingering in survival mode and really processing and moving on from his trauma
#does this make sense. one mutual likely knows what specifically spawned this idea#like. i imagine link just has ptsd while linebeck has c-ptsd and im not sure what the difference in recovery is#if there even is one#like i think link def had some time after ww to decompress and he was with a support system and was able to get some processing done#while linebeck has spent like. most of his life in survival mode and has done some light processing but hasnt actually been able to really#move on and stuff until after ph. like he talks with oshus its basically therapy and airs everything out n is essentially prepared to reall#process and bellumbeck kinda just smacks him across the face with his trauma and forces him to speedrun that processing#like ive said i like bellumbeck being a weird catharsis it ends up helping him move forward it forcibly breaks down some walls#its added to that trauma pile ofc but he processes it like immediately so dw hes on track#uhhhh.#salty talks#linebeck#bellumbeck#phantom hourglass#loz#legend of zelda#anyways. i did some writing thats nice#is this how metaphors work
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Pages from trying to keep a little sketchbook-scrapbook type thing going for two weeks lol. I gave myself specific rules in hopes they might all end up more cohesive/consistent seeming, but alas, scribbly chaos reigns, it seems
#sketchbook#scrapbook#Actually I feel like these are kind of incomprehensible in photo form like.. In person holding the book its easy to look at#but as images on this scale I feel like there's so much tiny little text and small scribles and stuff you'd have to 'right click > open#image in new browser tab > zoom in' just to actually really see the thing. which for 7 images is excessive lol.. so. probably not the best#medium for sharing really but. I suppose I thought they might look cooler lined up next to each other. The whole part of using a#limited color palette is so that maybe they kind of seem to have more consistent color schemes or something throughout. but I dont#know if they look all that 'related' or not. I think these types of challenges I have always sucked at because I am a being of clutter and#excess. I can't just do like one little simple nice looking design and have that Crisp Neat calligraphy with evenhanded perfect lines#and perfect symmetical composition and etc. etc. Like some poeple post very aesthetically clean and cohesive looking sketch#pages or something but I simply cannot hold back the brain impulse to add more. more. more. Fill every single blank space with color#or a little drawing or a sticker or something. I take away 500 things and there are still a million there. Even when I thik I'm being#'simplistic' I'm still usually being 2x more complicated and cluttered than the standard or whatever lol. I guess thats clear from my#outfits/costumes though too. Like whatever that saying is from that person about something like 'before you leave the house take off one#more accessory. you dont need it' for me is like.. 'before you leave the house. add 10 more accessories. and 6 more layers. and another'#AAANyway. I wonder if also maybe some people would try to plan theirs in a way to look good or something or like.. plot things on the page#before placing them. I did sometimes have a theme for a day kind of (like day 10 I ended up finding a few gold and green things and then#was like.. hey... what if I looked for a few other things and only used these colors today') but aside from that I was just slapping down#stickers randomly and working around them to fill the page. Maybe a lot of neat minimalistic asthetic design is about planning and#having a Vision set ahead of time. instead of just complete random whatever. doodling whilst watching youtube videos or eating lunch. It's#a miracle actually I've managed to not spill any food on the book the whole time. anyway.. I do wish the highlighter really showed up. the#scanner kind of makes the colors look VERY different to irl. But also it got much clearer images than just camera pictures of pages. alas..#..Still oddly enjoy the phrase 'Salisbury Steak gently kissed with industrial pollutants'#probably my favorite section of 'gluing random papers and things onto the page' lol#Also I wonder if it's super obvious that I literally never ever use references when I draw (save for the few freakish looking youtube#face sketches) since everyone is always in the same positions and looking very similar ghhb. This could have been a good opportunity to#work on not solely drawing from my mind and try to do more Dynamic Experimental scribbles. NO. Same exact eye for the 90th time#be upon ye. But I guess it was meant to be casual 'daily doodles'. True 'practice' would make it seem too effortful like a full project. hm#(lol the one decimated pencil in the set... never hand me a writing utensil. i will passively destroy it somehow. shaving the sides of a#pencil off with a knife or snapping a pen in half as a nervous fidget without even realizing i've done it. sorry to the drawing implements)
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Im cringe IM MEGA CRINGE but im free.
#this anything Silly gang?#I SHOULD ALSO MENTION!! Four is colin. The puter rabbit version of the puter. I did a mix of in show names and nature names. after the poll#I dont like putting headcannons in my stuff or fics cus i want everyone to enjoy it n all.#then i realized “thats nice persy BUT#this is some wacky shit even for you. so just enjoy it and do whatever you want”#plus watership downs world has very in tact storyline so this is a challenge fr. but i love a good writing challenge.#Anyways ill do more of the bunnies maybe.#dhmis au#dhmis#dont hug me im scared#dont hug me i'm scared#dont hug me im scared au#watership down
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caught up finallyyyy. that shit was FIRE
#ninjago spoilers#im loving the overarching plot even if some of the moment to moment stuff is losing me#in particular the dialogue felt rlly clunky to me a lot of the time w characters justttt. expositing at every chance#but i rlly like sora and arins arcs so far. really really good#arin is maybeeeee leaning a little too Evilllllll for my tastes BUT i do think it makes sense at least#finalllyyyy a good fucking corruption arc#found the kinda... prodigy sora on the stage at the end alone very powerful#it nice to see them growing at different rates and the conflict it might cause#still not sure what wfs deal is yet but i did rlly like her relationship w roby. super cute. they matched each others freak#i miss jayyyyy still but nice that its being built up to#hopefully it pays off nicely bc the 2 secs of it we got to see was... umm. not the bestttt#altho interesting to see now that jays been shattered.#also i assume it just went back to the administration? seemed that ras was done w it#i wonder if jay wld be able to find anything out abt itself if thats the case.....?#i mean youd assume it tried already. butttt u cld say maybe it was under the agency as jay gordon which wld have come up w nothing#UM ANYWAY i do rlly like where the story is going it feels rlly cool and different to have everything developing over time like this#compared to the more contained seasons from before#also just saying. if i was lloyd id straight up kill myself#rlly funny imagining llpyd getting back to the monastery and sighing and replacing kais photo w arins#yes yes. very good. zane saying cringe made my jaw drop#actually ill say i do hate how they r writing zane. but thats been an issue for forever now so wtfeverrrr
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can i be honest. the way you guys reacted to traveler being mad at lyney and lynette for not telling them they were fatui is kinda silly
#like first yes we ARE friends with actual fatui harbingers. or ex fatui harbingers#but. they LITERALLY tried to kill us?? and caused problems in our life on purpose and that we had to solve??? like. we're only friends NOW#they are BOTH BOSS FIGHTS#WE WERE ENEMIES#and especially with childe there was some real broken trust in there back in liyue#like how. how can you be surprised that the traveler might have some qualms about associating w fatui again#no matter how nice they seem#YOU know lyney and lynette arent evil. because ur the audience and you have all the information + an outsiders perspective#the traveler is a character. they dont know what lyney and lynette are really like. they were quick to trust and defend them but#theres a limit yknow?#traveler switched up the attitude out of nowhere but thats just because genshin writing sucks i thought that had already been established#AND BESIDES#DID YOU EVEN DO LYNEYS STORY QUEST#LIKE#THAT TAKES PLACE AFTER THE ARCHON QUEST. NO?#AND THE TRAVELER WAS LITERALLY SUPER OKAY WITH BOTH TWINS#LIKE THEY DID NOT HOLD A GRUDGE WHAT ARE YOU GUYS EVEN TALKING ABOUT DID I MISS SOMETHING#HELLO ????#anyway. yeah#complaining tag
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hope everyone’s had/is having a lovely day so far!! 🥺💗 here is some extra love!!!
#what’s smth that u’re grateful for today!!!#mine r good conversations and kind people 🥺#bought matcha this morning and the barista was so nice!! 🥺#i asked if he could remove the sugar and he rllY DID a lot of places will usually lie and say theres no sugar akksksks but#when i drink it its super sweet.. so wdym theres no sugar BUT ANYWAY#he drew a lil heart after my name too!!!! 🥺 makes me wanna experience being a barista some day so i can write cute things on peoples cups!#and hopefully make their days 🫶🏻#an establishment also let us use their parking while we bought coffee 🥺#and and!! a good friend i haven’t hung out with in a while dropped by!! to spend time w us for my bf’s bday (we r a group)#and!!!!!!! had dinner with my bf’s family and i love his parents so much 🥺#they’ve always been so so welcoming and kind to me !!! rlly showering me in so much love 🥺 and conversations over dinner were so nice !!!#i can ask them anything i’m curious abt and they’ll always answer sincerely#his mom is also a finance god i think … she always has so much wisdom when it comes to finances ajsnsjs#anyway!! thats me rambling!!! i am full of love today!!! so i want to pass it on!!#i talked so much again
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anyway i need to hang out with my brother again he is the one person who i am pretty sure knows literally everything about me so he's the only person i trust that i can absolutely not disappoint. nothing i can do could be worse than the sum of everything i've been doing to that poor man (and him to me) the past 19 years
#especially now that im back into literally the only interest we actually share on a deep enough level to enjoy it together LOL#i mean we were also both into hannibal but thats just not an enjoyable show to watch together its too much effort#but wow that time we read das boot slash fanfic on the bus together that was awesome#and the time we wrote fanfic together lol LITERALLY WHY DID WE STOP#he has only gotten cooler and more comfortable with his gayness since then we need to write fanfic again ‼️#anyway i feel sorry for every person in my life but i dont think anyone ill ever know could ever have as close a relationship to me as him#were platonic soulmates lol but like not in the spiritual sense bc its pretty obvious that its not some supernatural bond#its juuuust shared trauma haha and the fact that our trauma is so complex and layered that only we will ever truly understand each other#there has been a really rough patch where we practically did not talk for 4... 5? whole years im serious. maybe on the weekends sometimes#while we were stewing in our own shit. but now were inseperable i think it actually pisses off the rest of our family because every time#theres some event where we meet again (we live like 5 hours apart) we only hang around for like an hour before we get in his car#and drive somewhere and hang out there for the rest of the day and night and only return at like 3am drunk#in a sense i guess were catching up on all the missed time#to be honest we both had some horrible shit going on in our heads me with the transgenderism and toxic relationship#him with his anger issues and (what he calls) psychopathy. like ill say this much he was not a good person as a child he was a devil#he was quite literally what some describe as born evil like u know those satans spawns kids that cut off babys fingers and dissect rabbits#all that yk. and i was his first and most frequent victim due to availability lol and my parents did not know any of it and if they did#they ignored it. so yeah u can imagine the relationship was a little strained and for a long time i lived in fear of him#also due to all the death threats and attempts on my life HAHA its kinda funny because i can say all this all detached now#but i think to anyone else this sounds mad as hell. like im not talking roughhousing or being mad at each other#he was always scarily calm and hyperintelligent he was actually diagnosed with some form of like super high intelligence that#makes kids capable of being really manipulative and thats what he used at every turn. everything was always calculated that was scary#if he was nice to me i would question if he was trying to lure me somewhere to hurt me yk?#anyway. sometimes those old thoughts come back when were hanging out alone but mostly i know hes changed and worked on himself#sorry oversharing oh wow
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thought i had ONE homework assignment due today but it turns out i have TWOOOOO FUCK MY STUPID BAKA LIFE
#zipmode talks#I. think? we don't have any class on moday though. IIRC. Which is nice.#ughhhh its just more writing than i thought it was going to be BUT!!! i might already have some stuff prewritten#also we have to do that stupid fucking “what are five words you didn't know the definition of in the reading” thing.#i hateeee assignments like that because i am verbose as fuck theres never that many words I don't understand#also one of the response forum things we did earlier this week there was another response that was worded differently but-#had a similar structure to my response AND it was submitted earlier and im scared people are gonna think im a copycat#but i swear on my life i didnt even glimpse at other people's responses until i was done on my own!!!! its just crazy coincidence!!!!!#so anyways yeah thats how im doing right now
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😍😍😍
#accidentally slept through my only class today#which whoops sorry. (my 9am english)#which kind of killed step 1 of a plan of mine but thats okay#anyways THEN i had to go downtown to pick up this award bc i forgot to show up to the ceremony like a dumb dumb#but the building was like a 25 minute walk and it was COLD (punishment for my dumb dumbness tbh) but anyways i got there early so i walked#around the block and then went inside and picked up my medal#and i was already far downtown so then i popped my head in a couple of stores as i slowly walked back#got a few things from target. new hair clip nail polish m&ms pens and then a mango. very excited to eat that either later today or tomorrow#then i popped in the calligraphy store and then the comic shop and looked around. saw some white ribbon in the calligraphy store which ive#been looking for but didnt get it because it was a bit wide and kind of expensive and i want a lot for my project idea#(want to write out some of my favorite poems on them in sharpie and then use it to accessorize)#and then i went to the comic shop and peeked around. saw a nubia issue and a few gl 2021s in the discount bin but i didnt get them bc#they were all middle issues and i havent read those books yet although i do want to someday bc my guys were in them. one of the gl 21s even#had simon on the cover so i was very !!!!!!!! thats my guy!!!!!#didnt buy anything there but i did ask the guy to make sure to order a copy of the spirit world tpb so ill stop by to get that in a few wks#and then i went to the bookstore cafe and got a cold brew and did a but of English there. they have tables in the stacks its nice. the one i#grabbed was just surrounded by old paperbacks of sci fi and thrillers lol. didnt see anything id read but recognized a few author names like#card (no enders game though) and the pern lady (idk her name i havent read it). anyways did half a blog post thats technically late (ill#backdate though dw) and then packed up and i grabbed a gyro from the halal cart on that block which i just finished back at my dorm <3333#anyways good times. now im gonna try and spam some work and go to freaking trivia team for the first time in a month later. oops#blah#oh and i think the halal cart guy may have given me a free soda. unsure abt that though bc its possible it came with and i was just being#silly again. so anyways i had a ginger ale too
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also basically all of those screenshots are tavon being mean b/c i think its way funnier when he's mean. i dont screenshot when he says nice things
#shitpost#i mean. i do. i have over 1000 screenshots from today#but like. i dont usually POST those#thats for my brainworms writing process#he was nice to petra and to sa'har this patch. and rass i suppose but he DID say something pretty mean to rass so i think it balances out#well. not to rass like exactly but tavon did say like one shitty thing about mandalorians lmao.#because he was like. uhhh you guys better fix that shit. and rass was like I KNOW WE'RE WORKING ON IT OK#etc etc its fine. but it was a little mean#anyways also#he said something almost out of character to petra because he was like#im not qualified in this but i AM the leader of a force enclave so i feel like i should tell this nascent force user that uh#leaning on her anger probably isn't a good move. and. in a practical sense. will probably get her killed#but ALSO i know for force users there are some Not So Good Vibes Here#so like. im obsessed w/ that too#and tbh tavon has been wanting to actually talk to sa'har since like. manaan.#since manaan he became like. he basically has no intention to fight her unless she makes it happen#which is VERY STRANGE for him#but he picked up on the Something Is Going On vibes and he's like. hmmm#usually he is far more like. harder to disarm vs a foe#but he can tell sa'har is presenting herself as a foe and... isnt one really#which is quite fun for me because that's not something tavon does often#something i expect more from my other characters
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i'm a little late (oopsies) buuuut if you're still answering 'em, 6 and 14 for the artist asks? ehehe
hi misty!! thank you for stopping by with the artist asks, i'm happy to answer them!
6. Anything that might inspire you subconsciously (i.e. this horse wasn’t supposed to look like the Last Unicorn but I see it)
it took me a bit to come up with an answer for this because stylistically speaking, i try to be very deliberate with what choices i want to try out and yoink from artists...
that said, i think that whenever i do any silly comics, because i'm not too well-versed in the medium, i feel like my expressions end up getting subconsciously inspired by expressions i see passed around a lot... like anya's waku waku expression or MS paint tails...
so basically memes...! im a very silly littel guy. oh and do cats count i swear my expressions are based off of meme cats sometimes.
14. Any favorite motifs
i think in most arts of mine it's very easy to see that i'm so very fond of sparkles... i can't help but insert a little ✨ into my work... i am also very fond of the moon (all phases are cool but i am most drawn to crescent and full moons). this is probably not a surprise whatsoever given that ryoji's one of my favorite characters 🤣
i think i just really like circular motifs in general too... like radial lines? concentric circle? is that what they are called? my vocabulary regarding these are a bit lackluster, so here's an example of what i mean featuring a sylvain concept from may 2023 that will probably not see the light of day </3 (this was supposed to be for his birthday) (being impaled by the lance of ruin is a great birthday gift i know)
for composition heavy things i usually enjoy integrating character motifs... whether if it's very direct (e.g. crests for fe3h characters, the moon for ryoji, water for minato), or just something that i feel reminds me of the subject matter... (i love sprinkling music notes whenever i draw ryomina i just think there's intimacy in sharing music together when you use ur headphones to isolate urself but umm thats very unrelated to this ask.)
i also really enjoy visual motifs being used to make characters look like they are being displayed in a church (see this tweet for examples of characters)... i guess you could say religious imagery? i'm very fond of the art nouveau style and i feel like i'd wanna make a few pieces like that!
#lizzy askbox#thank you for the ask!!! i had a lot of fun reflecting on these#especially number 6 given that i had to think a different angle that wasnt necessarily 'style'#i did briefly consider yosuke as an answer to number 6 (he subconsciously informs my ocs but i cannot fucking explain that#also that's writing and not necessarily drawn art#14 was also fun! it was a nice realization that maybe i would enjoy relearning about art history#ive had some art history classes in 2016 but i dont think i drew a lot at that time to incorporate what i learned from those courses#into my own works... and also thats just a long time ago that i can only remember the general gist haha#like.. relearning about art history to be able to put names to the motifs and styles that were around#i definitely know that some people are inspired by classical paintings and i think thats fucking swag#and i probably would be too if i took a look at them again!#actually the sylvain wips not that bad. maybe i should come back to it. LMAO#i think i stopped because i tried to clean it up and god forbid i clean anything up (hate that shit!!)#anyway im rambling. thank you again! i love talking about art i will still be happy to answer more of these! <3
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ummmm
#oh mika there is beauty in life~ look at your future! everything will be worth it in the end~#my favorite image on this device btw ^#cw negative#cw vent#you know where this is going. apologies my mind is a mess and i really just need to get it out because i find its better than-#-writing a semi formal email to that One (1) emotional support organization and i’m afraid to make a call so#but i just genuinely believe things would be better off if i weren’t alive. a bit of a silly thing to jump to i know but#my tuition fees aren't cheap and i'm not even that great of a student or a daughter or a sister and i-#-have no talents or remarkable feats. i’m not impressive in any way. and i hate hearing shit about how ^_^ its okay! we all have something-#-special about ourselves! for example maybe you have really good hand writing and thats good enough ~ but that doesn't work for me because-#-i have nothing. my handwriting isn't good my singing isn't good i'm not artistically gifted i don't have some random affinity for puzzles-#-i'm not charming or somehow really good at calculation or super creative or a really comforting friend i really have nothing at all#i don’t want to die. i have no plans on doing that sort of thing anytime soon— don’t misunderstand me#i just wholeheartedly believe i don’t deserve to be here anymore not because i’m not loved. i just can’t stand myself and my teenage years-#-feel so long and i'm so fragile how much longer do i have to tolerate. i'm contributing nothing. why should my family have to feed and-#-clothe a burden like me who provides nothing. why should my friends care for someone like me. i’m not really that funny or sweet or great-#-with advice giving or pretty or helpful in any way. why is it that life is genuinely easier for others. what did i do? what can i do?#how much longer must i tolerate this? would you believe me if i said i really did try to change my mindset this time?#i have no one in real life to talk to. therapists are pricey and i don’t think mine was helping me in any way anyways. she was nice though#so every night i sleep hoping i wake up somewhere else. somewhere where i'm happier and i can live all my silly fantasies where i'm a fun-#-and lovely person who has everything she wants and nothing goes wrong ever!!#how much longer must i hang onto the little things. i’m in such an exruciating amount of pain that i want to kill myself without dying? lol#everyone repeats the same stuff. get bit#i can't rely on the joy of having coffee every morning or persevere for the sake of seeing cute cats on insta. nothing will ease the burden
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#wanna die. but thats okay#that anon DID get to me even if i tried to not care and im sure its because i had an awful day today#SIGHHHH whatever. whats done is done i wont post art ever again. or at least until i see some improvement#its weird though. they came straight at me just when i was thinking i was starting to get better at it. my profs were thinking that too#mehhhhh i need a hug. so much shits been happening to melately and im about to collapse#lost all my irl friends. some online friends too#im fed up being part of the student council. im so tired from staying up until 5 am doing my proyect and writing#still havent heard from my job at the gallery and i dont think the other museum is going to call back#i still need to find more scholarships and apply for anything i see fit. ill settle for spain if i have to#sorry for this huge wall of text. i have no one to talk about my feelings like this. so im just venting to myself#im sure no ones reading it anyways so thats nice. i just like to complain#whatever. whatever. i miss them so much#wordswordswords
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now that we're passed halfway thru season 3 of rescue bots i feel like the show is starting to annoy me a lot less im having a lot more fun now
#me text#the curse on the island still prevails but at least some different things r happening#ALSO I LOVE HIGHTIDE BLURR AND SALVAGE...#ive only just met them all but i love them#but i wont forgive hightide for being so mean to blades#i think hightide would use slurs. like that one clip of spanish dub kup#anyway this shows character writing is so fun... i thougght id be annoyed that we#only get new characters but i loved them all immediately n thought their#intro episodes were rly nice#but i feel like hightide got off too easy.. SORRY IM MAD AT HIM#OP U DIDNT SEE HOW HE WAS TREATING UR KIDS... U DIDNT SEE.. GRRRR#ALSO FUCKING JULES VERNE???????????#thats all i have to say abt that ep. i liked it i was just so confused abt that part#kindof fucked up ending but i hate moroccos racist ass so i dont care#ok ig i did have more to say abt that ep#i wanted him to die. not bc of justice or w ever i dont care i just thought#he was annoying as hell n wanted him gone permanently. and HOPEFULLY painfully#but that works too ig
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yrkeby4ur8
#hi its personal post as tho tumblr is my diary in the tags while still being vague time bc my coping strats are failing me a little and#ig being able to essentially shout into the void is kinda nice like i cld physically write things down but i did a lot of that#already today w sssitnments and my fjfknging joints hurt so here we are!#ig theres also comfort in knowing someone somewhere probably read it. regardless of what they think/feel/the impression it gives them bc.#like. i exist! i guess? idk.#anyway that being said tw for talk of sh and upsettio spaghettio n stuff.#but yeah im like 🤏 close to relapsing with cutting or some sort of. idek.#and the only reasons im resisting are like. its been so long and itd be a shame to break that streak#which funnily enohgh mskes another part of me wana do it MoRE to like. idk. remember. and. punish ?? idk.#but we're ignoring him rn hes being a little too edgy.#and then bc it would feel like im being manipulative and ik if ppl find out they would probably be very . distressed.#and if it were me and i found out i know id be incredibly distressed and maybe a little scared and just knowing other ppl like it just#would not help the situation ykwim itd probably make things worse#also kinda too tired physically emotionally etc rn to do it and go thru it and the aftermath and having to clean up and take care and#trust myself to be. safe. enough. abt it.#but. now hear me out. IF i do it somewhere that isnt super obv or visible. i doubt theyll know anytime soon.#and if things go. in a way thats.. i dont think i can cope with then well ill prob end up right back in this feeling without the like#withstraint of someone who cares and wants to care abt themselves and others and want to control themself and behaviours and health#but that thought in itself feels manipulative bc its like saying either way i wld prob do it teehee like a threat but. its. oeurghgnnfd.#i just. am struggling to cope. i feel things. so much. and. hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#i think if i have made it this far for this long i will be able to keep going without resorting to that?#but i really do hate that its like. wld be. yeah like turbo bad.#a very small and fucked up part of me feels like if things do go bad then what does it even matter and even better if whoever were to know#that i HAD relapsed bc ig at that point its like. idc who is upset or disappointed or uncomf or scared of/for me and thinks im terrible bc#at that point like. things are all. tumbling (lol) snd messed up so if i am messed up then whatever! ig. ????#but umm. yeah. idk i guess im just frustrated with my own . caring abt being responsible and stuff#there was a time when i was not as likely to be able to resist consequences be damned#im like over here going thru the stages of grief on god fr fr no cap on the stack or whatever ppl say#in other brighter news i managed to get a bit of work done on one of my assignments and some needed friend time but wasnt actually able to
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≡;- ꒰ ° Sick fuck... ꒱
TW: NSFW - MDNI, name calling, slight cnc, yeah thats it???
character: Nam-gyu x F!Reader
summary: You pressed 'x' now you'll face the consequences of your actions
word count: 4.724
a/n: look, for some reason, he was my fav, idk why, idk how, its how it is ok???? I can't take myself seriously lol. I rarely write smut, I'm probably HORRIBLE at it, but we need the content for him ok??
Nam-gyu dragged you into the female bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind him. You try to free yourself from his grasp, but there's no use. "Hey-! HEY-!! For fucks sake guards-! If you don't do shit, why are you even here-!" you keep yelling as he struggles to shove you into a stall.
He shoved you against the cold wall of the stall, pinning your wrists above your head with one large hand. Leaning in close, his black eyes flashed with anger and lust as he growled, "Listen up, you little cock-tease. Next time we vote, yeah? You'll press 'O", understood?" His other hand groped and squeezed your breast roughly through your shirt. "Mmm, but maybe this is what you wanted all along, huh? To get me all worked up and desperate for your tight little body?"
He crashed his lips against yours in a brutal, kiss, biting and sucking on your bottom lip hard enough to make it throb. "Strip," he commanded coldly, releasing your wrists only to start tearing your clothes off yourself. "Now! Before I rip them off and fuck you on this filthy floor." With one quick motion, you slap him across his face. "Fuck you-! I don't even fuckinh know you, so what do you want from me?! I pressed 'X', and?! We keep playing the fucking game anyway!" you shout at him. Nam-gyus eyes flashed with rage as you slapped him hard across the face. The sharp sting of your palm against his cheek made him see red. He grabbed your wrist in a vice-like grip, twisting your arm behind your back and shoving you face-first against the grimy bathroom wall. His body pressed firmly against yours, pinning you in place as he leaned down to growl menacingly in your ear.
"Listen here, you fucking slut," he snarled, his hot breath tickling your neck. "I know for a damn fact the longer we play, the more people wanna press fucking 'x'. And I wanna keep going, so after the next round, the next vote, you'll press 'o'. If you don't, I'll make sure I kill you, and not a fucking game." His rough hands immediately found their way to your tits, groping and kneading the soft flesh harshly as he grinded his hardening bulge against your ass.
"I'll fucking ruin you," Nam-gyu hissed venomously, giving your nipple a sharp twist through the thin lace of your bra. "Scream for help and see if anyone gives a shit. They all probably jerk off to ya. Now, are you going to be a good girl and do as you're told, or do I need to get rougher?" "No-!" you stutter out, "you got your point across-!" You're 90% sure you'll die in the games anyway, after seeing the first you knew you wouldn't survive. Better play along now, than suffer even further with whatever he has planned. If you're lucky, he just did all that to scare you off...at least you hoped so. Playing tough wasn't so easy....
Nam-gyus grip on your wrist loosened slightly as he sensed your submission. He kept you pinned against the wall, his hips still pressed firmly to yours as he leaned in close, his voice a low, threatening rumble.
"Damn right I got my point across, baby," he growled, his lips brushing against your ear. "As a reward, we're keeping you save next game, hm? How's that sound?" He slid a hand down to your ass, squeezing the flesh roughly as he grinded his now fully erect cock against your backside. "Now, since you've been a bad girl, I think you deserve to be punished. Lucky you! You'll get both, a reward and a punishment. Aren't I nice?"
Nam-guys other hand slid under the hem of your pants, pulling them down. "Cute, did you know this was my favorite color on you, hm?" he teased, hot breath tickling your ear as he rubbed your clit through the fabric of your panties.
"Sick fuck..." you mumble, more to yourself than for him to actually hear it. Nam-gyu smirked cruelly as he heard your mumbled insult, clearly amused by your feeble attempt at defiance. "Yeah, I'm a sick fuck, but I'm YOUR sick fuck," he taunted, punctuating his words by shoving two thick fingers knuckle-deep into your dripping cunt.
"But you aren't a healthy minded bitch either, look at how wet you are." he chuckled darkly. He pumped his fingers in and out of you roughly, curling them to rub your walls with each thrust. You try to swallow down moans and gasps, but you can't. It feels too good and for some reason...you even enjoy it. He quickly turned you around, shoving your back against the wall. His thumb found your clit and rubbed the sensitive nub hard, making your legs tremble and your pussy clench around his digits.
"Listen to this desperate cunt sucking on my fingers like they're my cock," Nam-gyu laughed mockingly. "You can't get enough, can you? Don't worry, I'm going to give this pussy exactly what it needs."
Having fun never hurt anyone, right? After all, you're a sick fuck too...
#squid game#squid game 2#squid game x reader#nam gyu x reader#Nam gyu x reader#Squid game nam-gyu#Bro idk i hate tags
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