#then i realized “thats nice persy BUT

[persy-r-bozo]

Im cringe IM MEGA CRINGE but im free.

[sanchoyo]

@mewscarrafone thank you! 🥺 and... uh. hm. the most roast-worthy about persimmon is. the funny thing is. ...hm.

I...

im struggling to think of things to roast her about. because the thing is. anything 'funny' or worth 'roasting' on a surface level gets a lot more. Sad. upon further inspection? in a way mira and aqua don't necessarily. (not to say they don't have angst but they have funny stuff unrelated to their Sads)

sure, shes lazy when shes at the cafe! haha, how silly, shes always napping around on grape! ...uhh, excessive sleepiness is a symptom of depression. plus the fact shes up a lot of the night because its weird to sleep in a new place. its hard to feel entirely safe there, no matter how nice the humans are. after all, queen was nice to everyone and she still did really awful things...

and she'll own up to being 'lazy' and laugh it off! no problem! then you realize shes a major source of intel, of chimera anima knowledge, and of alien tech, and you realize. huh. she actually..works kinda hard to help in non combative ways... is her self proclaimed laziness maybe. maybe her feeling like shes not doing enough? and mira and aqua are very likely to take her at face value. not to be rude to her on purpose or anything, but they do have their own Things going on so its easy. to just listen to persimmon when she shrugs and laughs and says she hasnt done any work today. easy to nag her a little, and really, who would want pity over nagging? she can handle nagging. the prospect of talking about her problems? no thank you!

I guess its funny she spends all of miras money constantly, until I go. Oh. Well. she sure is trying very hard to educate herself on the earth culture she happened to land around, stock up on the fashion, learn the customs and fads via magazines. buy as much as she can to look the part. assimilate as fast as possible. because thinking of Home is Painful and Everything here is So Different, Right? best to throw herself into this wholeheartedly as a distraction. best to separate herself from the Bad Aliens like queen, blend in, be familiar and nonthreatening. file those claws down, smile with her mouth closed, be casual.

she'll complain that queen is so fake, that she puts up such a fake nice front, then turn around and put up a front herself. of indifference, of nonchalance, of an easy-going normal girl. she doesn't need to, not with the humans, because they'd accept her no matter what, but she just. can't trust that. not immediately, at least. her and mira are opposites, in a way, because where mira wants to shine and struggles to get the kind of attention she wants, persi wants to vanish sometimes, but it'd be impossible to ignore her.

she risked being caught and thrown in a cell, she risked teleporting through space to warn the humans, to help them however she can, as much as she can, then turns around and jokes that shes lazy. that she runs away from her problems.

the funny thing is that she believes it. even though mira and aqua are the earthlings of the trio, born on the planet, persimmon ends up having the most 'humanity'. for better or for worse :)

....

ok but actually its def the fact that shes incredibly aroace in a magical girl story with the regular level of romance thats standard for magical girl stories. theres like 3 diff romance subplots going on and shes canonically considered one of the Prettiest Characters but she Wants That Shit 1000 miles away from her, thanks. and shes seriously side-eyeing everyone whos trying to get together WHEN THE WORLD (MULTIPLE WORLDS.) ARE BEING THREATENED?? HELLO?? PRIORITIES??? Persimmon wants to elbow drop masayume SO bad FR. this isnt roast worthy its actually awesome of her but it is objectively kind of funny just based on the genre. so. worth the mention :3

aqua is so funny shes a robot but she does not have 'artificial intelligence' she has NO intelligence (respectfully and lovingly but its true) shes the group tank so all of her programming is geared towards fighting. if she became a 'real' girl she'd immediately go sign up for pro wrestling or something tho bc she like. does kind of enjoy fighting (but has to hold back a lot bc she is VERY good at Fighting so theres not many ppl she'd feel great about going 100% of her strength on, and has mostly no-kill* parameters in place. so. her ideal fighting would be as a hobby when theres no stakes! bc she hates when ppl are fighting verbally and for the sake of war/destruction, but enjoys physical fighting, like recreationally!) .....but like... if you asked her to do some multiplications or help with calculations on something (because assuming a girl with a computer in her head would be good at that is a normal assumption, I think) she would give you a thousand yard stare and you can hear her internal fans whirring as shes frantically opening the internet in her head to google whatever you just asked as fast as possible. heaven forbid she doesnt have wifi and is outed as having No Braincells 😔

[moonchildhcs]

parkjin hcs

friends to lovers au

youve accumulated an interesting and lovely friend group over the years !!! from felix, your aussie meme supplier to persi, your chaotic fool ! 

but honestly? youre most grateful for your lovely (ahemboyahem)friend hyunjin !! bc honestly,,,

you two have been friends since diapers and have been together through thick and thin, from bad haircuts to weird crushes ! 

you guys binge watched random shows together, cried together, camped out for concerts together, and so much more !!

he always without fail, knows what to say or do to make you feel at least a bit better and to regain enough energy to get through your day no matter how bad its been going

hes always been a pillar of support, and even when you called him at 4am because you cant sleep and youre exhausted and sad he sings you back to sleep and talks you through whatevers got you buggin

and it means so very much to you because youve had the misfortune of meeting some nasty people in your life, and theyve come and gone but hyunjin has consistently been there for you ! a lovely friend and your #1 supporter

and the same applies to him ofc!!! when he cries because he doesnt know if he can pursue his dreams, when he stresses over examinations, when hes craving jack in the box at 2am youre right there with him (even if you might be tired oops)

and youre quite the romantic so sometimes you look at your friendship like There Is No Way Our Friendship Is Real ! but it IS and its marvelous !!!

but ,,, on the topic of you being quite the romantic,,, your heart gets the BIGGEST dokis when youre around him

like youre absolutely enamored with his passion, his dedication, his energy, just, everything about him has you head over heels !!

and it doesnt help that hes also just incredibly cute. but also he represents the duality of man and you just generally feel attacked on all fronts like he is Cute And Hot And TALENTED He Is The Whole Package

but like,, over your dead body youd let him know you have a massive crush on him

bc above all else hes been one of the few people consistently by your side and you dont know what you would do with yourself if you somehow messed it up? but little do you know hyunjins thinking the exact same thing

but anyways

you and the gang go camping !!! it is summer break so it is warm and nice and although there are bugs you also dont have to worry about a storm carrying off with your tents

however,,, a miscalculation has occurred bc persi was initially VERY against going camping so bang chan only brought ten tents but ultimately they came after much convincing from minhos end

so,,, someone is either going without a tent or two people are sharing

and there was a Lot of discourse going on about who would be sacrificing their sleep to share a sleeping bag (incredibly close and pretty intimate) or sacrificing their sleep to the elements

however, seungmin was like :^) how about the last people who are awake can decide if theyll share or if one of them goes without the sleeping bag ! and everyone agrees

but you,, stay silent,,, because you notoriously stay up super late

“sleep is for the weak”

ah how your ideologies bite you in the ass now

first the youngest kids start to knock out like jeongin and jisung and felix and seungmin

and then bang chan and woojin who stayed up all night before producing and practicing singing, respectively

and then changbin, who was just rlly tired

and then minho and persi, who passed out after an Intense game of uno

which left you and hyunjin and youre internally freaking out bc even if you Insisted on sleeping ad facing the elements hyunjin is stubbornly nice and would make you take the sleeping bag

so you blurt out “do you want to just share the sleeping bag? its not much different to the sleepovers we had as kids”

and hyunjin looks calm and collected and goes “sure :^)” but internally hes SCREAMING in glee because hes exhausted but he Needed to stay up so it can play out the way he wanted it to which was : cuddle you

so you two separate to change into some pjs before slipping,, into the sleeping bag together

and it takes some shifting and adjusting but then !! hyunjin is big spoon and you are small spoon and you are so tense and awkward because HECKHECKHECK HES SO CLOSE

but then hyunjin kinda sleepily breathes against your neck

“relax”

and you just,,, turn into mush on the spot because thats so cute but incredibly attractive

and you two fall asleep, cuddling like that

and you wake up in the morning to bright lights and the sound,,, of people LAUGHING and you open your eyes to someones camera pointing directly at you

and as you wake up a bit more you realize,, that you and hyunjin shifted and you are lying down ON HIM, head tucked into his neck and his arms wrapped around your waist and you want to shriek

and then you feel hyunjin shift and you are MORTIFIED as he whispers a husky good morning and you zip zip that sleeping bag open, say a hushed good mornin before NYOOMING away from the hyunjin and your friends, currently crooning over the pictures of you and hyunjin cuddling on persi’s phone

you sneak into persis tent and change into some of their clothes because it Does Not Matter You Need To Yeet And Get Over The Embarassment

so you head down to the lake nearby and sit down on a log and just,,, repeat the scene of you looking up at hyunjin as youre laying on him, remembering the heat he radiated, the way he smelled, and youre like u//w//u but also :OOOO oh no youve got it bad

and you dont realize it but a few hours pass and everyone else is kinda like hm we might have made her mad lets give her some time to herself but hyunjin feels bad because what if youre upset at HIM poor baby

and so he goes down to the lake and he sits down next to you

“sorry if i made you uncomfortable. i know you said we should share the sleeping bag but i probably embarrassed you this morning”

and you,,, youre not only in love but also WHY IS HE BLAMING HIMSELF and you just,,, profess your love

and you just go on and on about how you really had a crush on him since you were tots and how hes just too nice and too sweet and his heart is too big for his chest and how he needs to look out for himself just as much as how he looks out for you but hes such a DUMMY for never realizing that youve had heart eyes for him this entire time

and youre just ranting about how uch you love him and you dont see the love in his eyes and so he shuts you up by giving you the sweetest kiss youve ever had in your LIFE

and hes like “i love you too angel :^)”

and you two walk back to camp, hand in hand, as persi SCREECHES and screams that theyll send you the photos that sparked this beautiful relationship

everyone is hollering but you and hyunjin just smile at each other, content