#anyways this in favor of my canon
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ONE OF THE THINGS I LOVE ABOUT THE CORPO PATH... ahem
Okay, talking about some mirroring scenes, I love how in the corpo path V sees the city from the AV and in Johnny's introduction happens kinda the same, both near Arasaka Tower (cause I'm sure V can't actually see the logo... ?)
Oh, ofc, also the fact that it starts in Arasaka Tower and you take the same path of the lobby in Don't Fear The Reaper
I LOVE IT WHEN ENDINGS CIRCLE BACK TO THE BEGINNING!!!
I LOVE IT WHEN CHARACTERS MIRROR EACH OTHER!!!!!
I LOVE IT WHEN CHARACTERS SEAL THEIR FATES IN THEIR FIRST SCENES!!!!
I LOVE IT WHEN CHARACTERS' GREATEST TRAITS ARE ALSO WHAT DOOM THEM IN THE END!!!!!
#they're kinda mirroring okay?#corpo path#oc: valery rodriguez#bd talking#let me be delulu#anyways this in favor of my canon
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jealousy really is the driving force of DamiTim as a ship. love that for them. love how Tim has the Robin mantle ripped away from him and he has to suffer the jealousy of watching Dick and Damian bond. how possessive over Dick Tim can be, to have him stolen by Dick.
even more so though, is the jealousy from Damian. how on earth do you cope when you finally get to be Robin, a role you've convinced is your birthright, and no one really likes you? every prefers the Robin who came before you? Dick regularly reminds you that he can always go and call Tim back when you act out? like the complex Damian has over Tim is unreal. Tim, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had everything handed to him his whole life. he never had to struggle or fight for his place like Damian did. Damian has spent his whole life fighting and proving himself, and yet he can't ever seem to truly claw the mantle of Robin away from Tim. even when Tim lets it go, becomes Red Robin, they seem to share it. Tim can slip back into the role of Robin whenever someone like Dick or Bruce need him to, because *he's* the Robin who they need. he's the Robin who was able to find Bruce. he's the Robin that Ra's wants an heir out of. he's the Robin who even Jason respects. in Damian's eyes, everything Damian has fought tooth and nail for, was handed to Tim.
so of course he's going to react to Tim with violence and aggression, especially after finding out Tim has contingency plans for him. no matter how much Damian proves himself, he's never going to be enough, especially not to Tim. and so his deep refusal to see Tim as family, to acknowledge Tim's legacy is all driven by such an angry jealousy. Tim understands aspects of Bruce's legacy that Damian doesn't, like the need to sweet talk and play nice with the elites of Gotham, even if they're corrupt. they exemplify different aspects of Robin, and the aspects that Tim exemplifies are the aspects that Damian knows he'll never fully understand and therefore holds such a deep contempt for. he wants to fight criminals, not play nice with politicians. Tim understands the side of Gotham that's utterly foreign to Damian. if anything, he represents that side of Gotham, to Damian. a pretty little rich boy who's nothing but a know-it-all and not a real son of Bruce. he can't be a Wayne. he can't be Damian's family.
and all of that angry jealousy leading to unhealthy obsession turned a weird, angry crush from Damian is just my bread and butter. that is how DamiTim should be. to me. Damian obsessed over hating Tim Drake so much he accidentally ends up sort of in love with him and that only makes Damian angrier. because he can't prove everyone right by *also* liking Tim. he can't let Ra's win like that, because frankly why wouldn't Ra's be delighted by Damian and Tim getting together. and it builds and builds with angry passive aggression towards Tim that culminates in angry hate-fucking-that's-not-just-driven-by-hate. love and hate are always viewed as opposites in shipping and i think they're the same intense passion just in different directions. and for the best ships, they're very intertwined. what is DamiTim is not the peak of that. "i put so much of myself into hating you i had no choice but to fall in love with you somewhere along the way" core. love that bleeds into hate and hate that bleeds into love. "you make me so angry i regularly passively try to kill you but not with any real effort because who would i obsess over if you were actually gone" core. murder attempts as a form of courting. contingency plans to take each other out as a love language. they're unwell.
#necrotic festerings#damitim#timdami#tim drake x damian wayne#damian wayne x tim drake#also possibly a hint of dicktim at the beginning there#i have yelled at my partner about them nonstop#so i had to put the thoughts into a tumblr post to give them peace.#i clearly favor tim in my ships we don't need to talk about it#tim drake is so weird he makes everyone else weird about him by proxy.#like sir contain that aura it's making everyone mentally ill.#i'm not a hamilton girlie at all which is why it makes me so mad Wait For It is SUCH good song for damian#like that song just IS his complex over tim#whether canon or shipping#this pulls from a variety of canon btw#like yeah mostly pre-flashpoint#but i do think the fact that in current comics canon tim keeps defaulting back to being robin#must make damian SO mentally unwell#like oh that does not help your jealousy complex does it.#and the thoughts of tim understanding the elite in ways damian doesn't are inspired by the boy wonder (2024)#which GOD is the first modern comic to fucking understand how tim and damian actually feel about each other#in a way that isn't either cartoonishly evil or makes them make up too easily#ugh. juni ba your mind.#anyway the complex damian has over tim. is fucking wild.#bc like everyone uses it to woobify poor tim for being attacked by big mean damian#which first of all stop taking panels out of context#second of all#dude no WONDER damian has a complex. i'd hate tim's ass too!!!#when i was reading batman & robin (2009) and dick casually says he can still call tim when damian acts out#what kind of threat IS that dick. sir.
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Was always worried about the angst of unrequited love, had never realized the sheer amount of comedic potential that it has.
Imagine one-sided Superbat where Clark is fully aware that Bruce has a crush on him but is being his repressed self about it, and Clark is just like, “I’m not gonna touch that :) you’re going to figure that out for yourself, buddy, and in the meantime, I’m just going to have a good time and be best friends with you as you inevitably pull yourself together enough to either fall out of love or to confess :) and I’ll just let you down gently because I care about you :)” but he absolutely 100% is using it to his advantage in the meantime. His puppy dog eyes had never been so effective before. He’s gotten out of Monitor Duty three times in the past month.
#altho tbh personally if *I* were writing this all out I WOULD make requited superabt endgame#because it’s more fun#like clark is slowly falling in love with bruce while bruce is slowly coming to terms with being in love with clark#like bruce fell both faster and harder because. have u seen clark. who wouldn’t fold#meanwhile the justice league tease the shit out of bruce#and i picture clark as being a hell of a good actor because he HAS to be for his identity to work even more so than bruce or anyone else#so he’s very much able to keep his own feelings quiet when he realizes that he’s returning bruce’s love#and hey maybe u CAN bring the angst full circle back into this premise#like 1) clark believes somehow that people will inevitably fall out of love w him and that includes bruce#and 2) bruce when he finally figures out his own feelings for clark (way later than everyone else figured out him) probs realizes that clark#knew this whole damn time and didn’t say a word. and bruce is both justifiably mortified and falsely certain that clark does not return his#feelings because he’d have said smth by now if he did#even tho atp i would have clark return his feelings#also if u don’t believe clark wouldn’t 100% be a little shit about bruce’s feelings may i just present#literally everything he’s done to lois ever in every superman canon ever#<- i’m not saying that like he bullies lois or would bully bruce in this fic premise bc they both give it as good as they’ve got#and they very much pull a lot over clark so it all evens out or even falls in the other’s favor more often than not#anyway. yeah that’s my one (1) superbat fic premise.#part of the reason why i LOOOVE superbat and clois but haven’t written jackshit for either of them yet is that#i feel like there’s sooooooo many fics for both of them that i could not explore smth new with them ykwim#er well in the case of lois not just fics but like sooo many clois canons with their own takes and exploratons#superbat#superman#clark kent#batman#bruce wayne#simu's two cents#dc#also i wouldn’t touch the batkids with a ten foot pole.
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Henry was lying, I think, about Michael finding a job listing not intended for him. I don’t know why he would do that, why he wouldn’t talk to Michael first or be upfront with him about the plan, I could guess, but I’ll never know. But I believe that there’s no way anyone else would have taken a job running a franchise for a failing 80s child murder restaurant, and I believe Henry knew that.
But the way he speaks about ensuring nobody remembers the Pizzeria, the fact that the office is set in the middle of everything so it would be nearly impossible to make an escape route for a person without having animatronics loose, the fact that he trusted a seemingly random employee to do what needed to be done for his plan to work, hell even the way the promotional and welcome tapes frame the restaurant seem to want to scare people off. It just doesn’t add up to “let’s get a random guy in here to do the dirty work and go home safe.” Instead, it seems more like “Let’s make sure that there are no more cryptids running around as a result of William’s actions. We can lure them, make them come willingly.” And Michael is easy to lure to the restaurant. In fact, Henry knows that he’ll apply to work there.
#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#michael afton#henry emily#fnaf 6#fnaf ffps#fnaf pizzeria simulator#my headcanons#Okay so… I think Henry lied basically#maybe it was to spare Michael’s feelings or whatever#amazing how this is the second time he fell for a long and complicated series of lies that got him killed#he will not learn#and now he’s dead#or maybe not honestly#anyway this isn’t canon but it’s canon to me#I just can’t accept that Henry would let Michael keep living his life#he probably knew somehow that he had been killed or at least knew that something was up with him#especially because he thinks he’s doing a big favor to everyone by killing them (and he probably is lol)#but whether it’s from a place of malice or care or he is apathetic to Michael I just can’t imagine him letting this one freaky cryptid stay
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obsessed with Shepard dying and being reconstructed by Cerberus. waking in a body you don't recognize, free of scars, a clean slate, unlived in. minor tweaks here and there, "upgrades" unasked for, cybernetic or bioengineered. 20/10 vision, too crisp and clear. a more efficient liver. old L3 biotic implant replaced with cutting-edge technology. forcibly assigned übermensch. have you been cloned, or merely Ship of Theseus'd? if they cloned you once, would they do it again? could you be activated as a sleeper agent? would you have any way of knowing? they say that paranoia is a sign of reaper Indoctrination. is it really paranoia if you have good cause?
#obsessed with how a shepard clone is laughed off for jokes in that dlc#haha oh well we obviously know our shepard is the REAL shepard. GIRL IS IT THAT OBVIOUS THO#anyway ''cerberus upgraded shepard's liver'' started as my jokey headcanon to explain the ''knocking back krogan liquor and surviving'' gag#but when you think about it...#roxene shepard#waking up on that table is really the beginning of the end for her. it's all downhill from here#(I think the liver thing is just my hc anyway I don't recall if it was hinted at in canon.)#(iirc canon miri had line about how they didn't change anything so dw? but imo she would and she'd consider it a favor)#(and anyway it's CERBERUS)#spectreposting
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Mfw one of my favorite characters in a game either isn't popular and barely exists in the fandom, or everyone hates them.
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#toy freddy#for the love of Scott Cawthon i beg all of you i need more toy freddy#balloon boy#he is my son and i will throw hands with you over him#the entirety of fnaf4#the twisted ones#they're so funky and gross#i don't care if they're just blank animatronics with illusion disks they've set up camp in my mush brain#this is mostly me crying bc i just had to make half of my favorite characters the least favored/most neglected of the entire damn franchise#also shipahoy dudley#sure wilson is a creep but dudley seems like a very polite boy#it's not his fault his father's a creepy old loon#shipahoy dudley#i worried glam chica would end up like my other favs considering how people basically acted like she didn't even exist before SB came out#anyways this originated from me being sour that toy freddy isn't very popular#y'all too busy lewding a clunky robot chicken that'd actually eat you to appreciate toy freddy#who canonically retired from killing night guards to be a gamer and is actually a pretty funky lil' dude#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#batdr#bendy and the dark revival#fnaf 2#fnaf 4#fnaf the twisted ones
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Ao3 Wrapped 2024
tagged by @femmegeorge and someone else I cannot find rn, I am so sorry, but thank you both <3
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works published: 17 (6 on anon, 10 as attraqtia, 1 hidden cause I did not like it) subscriptions: 88 (+ 47 user subscriptions. Where did you come from guys) kudos: 1,876 comment threads: 122 bookmarks: 660 (galaxy collapse alone is 133 lmao. stage lights second with 80) word Count: 166,512 hits: 27,480
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top three kudosed fics
galaxy collapse (somebody scream) (266 kudos)
home is only a town (you're just a guest) (237 kudos)
kicked out the stage lights (you’re still performing) (226 kudos)
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top three word count
now entering a world (from which you will never return) (51,522 words)
no rules (in breakable heavens) (16,275 words)
home is only a town (you're just a guest) (15,429 words)
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top three ships
Oscar Piastri/Logan Sargeant (2)
Alexander Albon/Logan Sargeant (2)
Oscar Piastri/George Russell (2)
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top three tags
Angst with a Happy Ending (5)
Pining (3)
Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence (3)
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tagging: @landoisokay @lafaerie @racingliners @weegreenbean @autumn816
#tag game#thank you for the tag i imagine someone who i tagged in return is the other person who tagged me adssfghj#anyway glad that my brand (angst with a happy ending and canon divergence) is still around :3c#been writing canon div less and less in favor of future fic and proper aus so glad that its still sticking around
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tbh, I stopped caring about houses that much when I found out that it's an otome/dating sim game with srpg gameplay sprinkled on top. In other FE games, you either gather supports by pair ups or by having units standing against one another. And mechanics like cooking in Fates were done to get some more stat boosts. And even if the avatarization of the game started with New Mystery, Robin and Corrin feel more like customizable characters than an avatar for the player.
In houses, Byleth is like every typical dating sim protag, that does not speak and the few times they do is by having the player choose options that may raise heart points with a character or lower them, you have to find lost items and when you give them back you gain heart points, you have to give them gifts to gain heart points and cooking now doesn't give you any beneficts in battle and only works for, you've guessed it, getting heart points. And let's not kid ourselves, tea time is like the "dates" in otome games, in which you can spam gifts till you raise the affection to the max. The only thing that distincts those points from the otome ones, is that those are necessary for proficency and for unit classes.
Heck, we even have a ring to give to the chosen blorbo in order to get a special custom made cutscene, when in pasts games getting an S support gave you a broken unit to deploy and a little blurb of text during the credits. And of course, calendar/day systems are also common in these tipes of games too.
People complained about awakening and fates for turning the franchise into a dating sim, but 3Houses is literally one in and of itself, and yet is praised as peack FE experience and as peack srpg.
(I could also argue that is because of this otome nature why the characters are "tell don't show" with their given trauma, unlike in pasts games when it was "show don't tell" (Nino, Reison, Camilla, Leif, Soren...))
Well,
When you put it like that, it becomes obvious that the other games (FEH, Engage) mentionning Fodlan are stuck on the uwu monastery part of the part 1 and not the, y'know, events happening that will lead to part 2 because as you said, the SRPG aspect is just "sprinkled on top" lol
However, the "pair up your units and build their relationships!" has been a non gameplay mechanics for decades now (FE4's was a gameplay mechanic, it had no support convos - FE6 added the support convos and gave a small gameplay boost but it didn't commit and we had no endings, FE7/8 had endings, FE9 had convos but FE10 removed them and yet had endings depending on the pairs, etc etc) even without avatars.
Then we entered the avatar era and if it added the "my waifu and my bae" shenanigans, FE13/14 were still more centered on the story aspect that on the "dating sim" aspect, as in, even if you could raise affinity with a character by doing X or Y, it wasn't really coded in a minigame - came FE16 which you analysed perfectly : tea time, gifts, eating, S-support CG, etc etc.
That being said, FE is a RPG, meaning it has characters : you play FE for the solid gameplay but you also build characters, and imo the best way to develop and write characters is to interconnect them with other characters, and/or with the plot/lore.
Sure, Arden functions as a wall/tank. But through the 5 lines he has, you learn that he is part of a group of knights, has friends who often tease him but is relied upon by those people and takes pride in that, he'd also like to find a wife someday and has self-esteem issues.
Is he as developped as, say, Xillia's Alvin? Hell no! But they're characters from two different genres, Arden has those 5 lines that puts him above any "generic" armor.
(I find it interesting how UO and in a way, FE11, gives you the opportunity to play with generics instead of playing with named characters, in UO generics will turn out to be better since you can change their growths, but they're generics. Do you want the RPG of the Tactics/Strategy aspect?)
So, I'd say that support conversations are important, I love Saias and Ralf to bits, but I'm sure I'd love them more if they had more lines. And since support through battle can be a chore (hello FE GBA and trying to get Bartre and Karla's supports when she joins 2 chapters before the end!), I initially welcome any way to grind those supports faster lol.
However, it can quickly spiral in, well, the otome mechanics we have in FE16 - if you want to build support then why not have an entire mini-game for that, and meals and chorals and whatever else?
It's all about finding balance between developping your characters without turning your game in a dating sim or what I'd call "playing the sims and pairing those dolls with those other dolls you like".
Still, let's not kid ourselves, nowadays the "dating sim" aspect of the series is, while decried by some, very popular - and FE is first and foremost, a series that has to sell.
3H is not peak SRPG not peak gaming experience or even in FE gameplay that'd be FE5 but I can't ignore the fact that its dating sim aspects might be part of the reason why it's still very popular.
#anon#replies#fe series#for my part i never liked harem protagonists or games/mangas it always pissed me off#but say if Lloyd can end up with different people and ladies in ToS#it's not the first argument that's thrown around when people praise the game#or even discuss about it#it's an accessory#i know redshit isn't a monolith but#for all the sass some had decrying mooners thinking with their ovaries and wanting to pick their uwu pwince to build a s support with him#UO's redshit has a lot of 'which waifu did you choose' posts#it's fun#granted the dating sim aspect of UO is also something i'm not fond of even if they tried to write it in the plot#still unlike Billy eating 150 meals per day#Alain doesn't have to sit with people eating#like you can order a meal between rodrick Joseph and Monica without Alain#I like seeing how characters are interconnected to each other and all#which is why I hate avatar or MC scissors#I can't help but wonder if the weak writing for the characters in Fodlan isn't due to Supreme Earl Grey#and the fact that they all must be able to uwu about Billy so can't have meaningful bonds#I remember some people joking that Alain can legit break what would be canon or heavily implied to be canon relationships in UO#which is all kinds of uhh writing wise for the characters involved#it's even more hilarious when the characters favor their already built relationship over the one you force with the MC lol#but anyways back to FE Fodlan I thought like#the writing for characters was shallow because they all must be able to ditch friends family and lovers for Billy#and that's just... as tasteless as a watermelon to me
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Something really funny that's occurred to me is the way Joe talks about Maccie is like she's some catastrophic event that happened to their family "I can't believe she's been here that long." / "Everything's been different since she was born" / "Everything changed." / "She changed everything."
And it's just rlly funny to me. I want to up the dramaticness of his words at some point. And anyway, he's talking to the Samurai/Ronin for the first time and I'm wondering the impression he's getting lmao
Joe is certainly expressive to me, but only when he's given the chance. And I think w Ronin, he just started letting a lot of stuff out bc thus guy is gonna go on his way anyways.. but then he's like wait!!! Actually let me go?? For a little? (Platonic yearning so bad)
Ronin like 》^. "I suppose.. Alright, curious karate man, I'll accompany you a little longer."
Or something I'm messing around UGH
#the reason everything changed is bc joes mother passed away either shortly after Maccies birth or during#that started the strain w joe and sr but they also had.. her yk? its just sillay#dysfunctional karate family ily <3#sr isnt a terrible father he is just narrow sighted and firmly believes he knows best. he doesnt give his kids the room to grow- but he#really loves them. he just wants to protect them in a way i think.. he just lost his wife and i think that made his parenting way more#overbearing. buT ALSO. JOE JUST BEEFS W MACCIE BC YK SJXNXNX theyre siblings#espexially when they were younger. teen joe is sooo funny to me. teen angst ft this baby i dont want in my room KGLZLGKXMVKKC#in current theyre much much closer and Joe has remained Maccie's favorite person. but Joe still gets really annoyed / tired of her sometime#SRRY ugh ily karate family#also also ronin and maccie dynamic so real. i like ronin being patient with children. except maccie is wayyyy more antagonizing to him than#like my oc the lost girl. so fun!!!! sorry#karate maccie#rh head canon#< new tag#karate joe#sr isnt a bad dad on purpose agenda. sr could have the possibility to apologize and fix things one day.#maccies only ever known this version of her father and she doesnt have the capaxity to try and forgive him for certain things joe will#maccie is the golden child but she is also the problem child. she uses her favor to her advantage and to rile up her dad sometimes#just bevause she can and she has a little bit of a problem with him sometimes bc.. you know? shes a very ambitious teen and she doesnt wsnt#to be shackled..... and she doesnt like thinking of Joe as that way and UGH#i love them im normal#to elaborate a tiny bit more i hc joe as having chronic fatigue like myself. hes low spoons and he pushes himself despite it.#but his disability holds him back sometimes snd its like.. you know? he doesnt want to be the weak memver of the family so he keeps pushing#but he also cares about karate too. its not something negative to him. and stuff. even if its hard. its avtually good for his body / health#when he doesnt overexert himself anyway
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It's so weird now that I looked at it again, my identiem continuation fic is only like 7k while my Ignatius!Roksoo (wmmapxlcf) fic has already touched 11k wc...
CUZ HEY!! I put a LOT of thoughts on identidem while Ignatius one was just vibe!!!
#I THOUGHT IDENTIDEM WOULD AT LEAST REACH 15K#WHERES THE OTHER 10K I THOUGHT I ALREADY HAVE#fic rant#im so sorry my child#I've neglected you#anyway#about ignatius...#we have athy pretending to crave for claude's favor in canon#so now i give you#roksoo who doesnt give a slightest shi* about what Clade thought about him#as matter of fact#hes currently planning for his escape actually#all while claude was like🧍♂️#you are NOT allowed to leave the palace#Ignatius!Roksoo: But i thought im not favored around here??#lol
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i love ff.xiv aka my oc photoshoot simulator <3
#lem text#⚓️🪽🍢 (ocs)#xivposting#hihiiii i'm afraid i have been in an unexpected 'fear of being perceived' arc so i haven't been talking much but here's my girl. <3#yka has gotten so many fc invites it's kind of ridiculous . officially determined most desirable member of rusapiyka light party ZNFDJKD#as you can see i may have AHEM made her a red mage despite saying i'd main tank as her the whole time......#pld is still her canon class but rdm's one of the most fun ones i've played... it has all the parts i love about blm but with DUALCAST SWAG#she's officially past the point of story i replayed as piccolo :) i'm enjoying the post-arr quests a lot more this time around...#the end of post-arr *was* when i started being really invested... i think that's the case for most people. big plot twist fun ^__^ <3#doing the crystal tower quests for the third time was still fun esp. with awareness of shb foreshadowing. arr raha is so funnyyy... <33#it does make me so sad watching y.da & p.apalymo . THEY WERE SOME OF MY FAVORITE SCIONS BC RUDY STARTED IN GRIDANIA :(#AH WELL AT LEAST MY MAN THANCREB WILL BE FAVORED BY THE NARRATIVE FOREVER GNFJKHWJH#anyway i'll be more talkative again once i shake this weird bout of insecurity znfjkd <33
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having another fictional character breakdown again but it (spoilers for a seven year old game) is so insane that saeran killed jihyun IN FRONT of jumin in the SE like THAT GUY DIED?? THERE IS A FUNERAL CG?? like why does the fandom collectively ignore that scene
#606.txt#i’m just thinking about jihyun#tragic kicked puppy character of all time my gd#also the se are literally the canon endings to the game sorry to be the saeyoung is favored by the narrative guy#but he is#anyway jesus christ#there is so much there in the fact that saeran eventually is allowed to join the rfa after everything#gd and jumin#i need to replay the epilogues#stream of consciousness mysme posting rn but i just remembered jihyuns after ending#WHEN SAEYOUNG THINKS THAT SAERAN IS DEAD#AND JIHYUN CARRIES HIM OUT OF THE BURNING MINT EYE COMPOUND#this game is not real my gd#i’ve gotta go die actually#or write. yeah maybe i should write#anyway byyyeee muah
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Shes MY main character self insert and I get to play MY headcanons onto her the way I want!
#anyway. i love aro headcanons of the traveler. i think romance is absolutely foreign to both of them but i do think theyre favorable to it#and bc both men and women characters flirt with my lumine ive been reading that as shes meant to be bi/pan coded lol#and as an aro bi - im here for the implications that are damn near canon lol#i do a lot of shipping... but my lumine is arospec along with bisexual 💚💚💚💚#sometimes we want the dating and the company. sometimes if a bit grayro or demiro someone can be real special (furina lol)#sometimes i just think characters look good together lol#shipping is suppose to be fun and so i do ship... but its real light. lumine is gonna save her brother and fly away. shes not staying lol#my gi#my posts#aro headcanon#aro headcanons#aromantic headcanons#aromantic headcanon#arospec headcanon#arospec headcanons
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ok ok fuck it I'm gonna try to be brave and actually work on Sterling and Gale's whole uhhhh situation bc I started a new bg3 run with my friend so now they're back occupying my brain. Again. Sooo... *carefully opens document*
#sry if this seems a little melodramatic but writing for them is weirdly difficult for me#bc im not a writer anyway idk what the fuck im doing regardless!!!#but also bc I always feel bad about how I wanna portray Gale. Like I always feel like my version of him is really ooc#bc not to go into too much detail but I really want to ramp up his insecurity and ego problems. quite significantly actually lol#like the few times in game where he's a little insufferable (i say this affectionately) bc of it are some of my fav Gale moments#and I made Sterling in a lab specifically to feed into that side of him#more on that some other time when I've worked out more specifics and also IF I don't end up feeling embarrassed about it again#i wanna make more stuff and be braver abt oc posting this year so tbh I'm gonna try not to care and just have fun#worrying so much abt whether or not my interpretation of a character is accurate or not ruined all of my prev attempts to work on this stor#and at the end of the day its not that serious so idc idc I'm taking Gale and doing my own thing with him canon or not#Gale to me is a balance act between being really kind but also being a bit insufferable and condescending bc of insecurity#and I wanna explore that while tipping the scales a little against his favor you get what I'm saying?#i tried to come up with a version of them that's more wholesome but it's just not interesting to me#back to two flavors of insecurity feeding into each other leading to codependency until they both irreparably ruin each other#i guess. smth like that#*repeating to myself* it's my oc x canon ship and I can do whatever I want with it. I'm doing this for fun and nobody but me has to like it-#*runs directly into a wall and passes out*
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ngl the casual way that surrogacy is used and talked about it fandoms/fanfics makes me a bit uncomfortable to be honest….
#this isn’t really about any fandom in particular#just something i’ve noticed for a while#like the way it’s so often used as a simple option for gay ships#especially if two characters have a child together in canon#but the surrogate character’s feelings are not often explored#or they just go along with it and are like so happy to do it?#i mean idk maybe it’s just me but like having a whole ass baby is kind of a big deal??#and it’s sometimes treated on the same level as like a favor?#like oh could you pick me up from the airport real quick#also while you’re there could you maybe idk have my fucking kid#no problem if not 🤗#like i’m sorry it’s just so funny#anyway i could go on about this all day#but it was something in marauders fandom that set me off so i guess i’ll tag that#marauders#marauders era#harry potter
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but okay i might as well post about it now before i forget all the important details-
i'm working on a mainverse for senju post-canon. specifically, it's a verse where the "dark impulses" curse that was affecting mikey was never actually destroyed - it simply "scattered" and spread to various people in the new timeline.
the reasons for that are probably convoluted af whoops i'm working on it basically as follows: first, when shinichiro was cursed, his only punishment was to be killed by kazutora. mikey's curse was actually a more indirect consequence of him having been dead in the previous timeline than a "punishment" from the old man, so to speak. instead, it as his own lingering feelings of self-hatred and a desire to "not be saved"/be let to rest from the original timeline that caused the curse to affect him in the new one.
for that reason, when mikey finally accepted that he wanted takemichi and everyone's help, in the moment where takemichi was dying, that's when the curse was fully broken. or... seemingly so.
see, the curse at this point was sentient enough that it wanted to sustain it's own existence. and so while part of the curse left mikey, his self-hatred which he still held onto caused a part of the curse to remain in him - less than before, but still present, even in the final timeline. on the other hand, the rest of the curse that had left mikey scattered to those who were present who also held onto feelings of self-hatred, blaming themselves for something or another - and among others, who else would be chosen but senju? senju still blamed herself for everything that had happened with haruchiyo, so the curse took a new home in her.
so what does any of this actually mean? basically, the idea for this verse is that even in the final reset timeline, certain characters still struggle with "dark impulses" to an extent. they're much less powerful than they used to be, manifesting not as an all-consuming urge to destroy but more occasional moments of anger, depression and emptiness, but nonetheless still exist. to mikey, who's lost a great deal of the curse, this is much easier for him to handle, so he's satisfied enough with what he's been given, but to characters like senju, cursed for the first time - it means she's essentially forced to struggle with an unnatural sense of anger and emptiness that she doesn't understand the cause of.
#ooc#i had more but this post is long enough lol#but tbh like. not everything is the curse's fault imo.#the curse may have been driving mikey to darkness but it was his own trauma and beliefs that caused him to give into it ->#that's always been my headcanon for canon; otherwise it feels like an interesting exploration of trauma is just reduced down to ''lol it wa#a curse the whole time'' you know??#but i do enjoy exploring the curse elements of tr as long as the role of trauma and character's own flaws aren't ignored in favor of it.#anyway that's more of a side tangent; the point is#i wanna curse senju too KAFKJHDFHHSDKJ#i might make my mainverse for post canon mikey similar tbh...#not the ''scattered to other people'' part#but just the part where part of the curse was dispelled; but part of it remained due to self-hatred#aspect of it. i'm keeping that across all verses i think#anyway too many tags send post time go!!
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