#anyway. time to work I guess

[twilightprince101]

I think there's something to be said about the idea of the "inner child"

Obviously, yes, you need to listen to your inner child in relation to bringing a bit of whimsy and joy into your life. That is very much important. But the idea of separating that from you, the "adult self/outer adult," kind of idealizes it a bit don't you think? It paints the inner child as something that is pure

But every day as I do something I hate, as I send out my fiftieth application that will likely be ignored and force myself to do adulting things like networking, my "inner child" is screaming and kicking and flailing, yelling at me saying "I don't want to do this." And if you outwardly make too much of a fuss, people tell you to "stop acting like a child." Children are pure until they are gremlins.

When people say to "embrace your inner child," I often wonder if that is truly what they mean, or if they're actually saying "listen to your inner child for little treats." They don't necessarily mean let it be the co-pilot. My brain goes back to that one adhd TedTalk, where the inner child becomes "The Instant Gratification Monkey." Dehumanizing The Inner Child the moment it interferes with productivity. The inner child is pure, after all

I've never envisioned "my inner child" as a separate entity, or bought into "embracing my inner child." It's always been me, as I currently am. The idea of breaking yourself apart into individual parts that you can blame and praise separately, it always confused me. It's still hating yourself, now with extra steps. I look at these parts of me as my whole self, something I as a person need to work on, not the monkey inside of me. That gives me a better sense of control, in that regard.

I don't know. Maybe this is just my own way of dealing with the parts of myself I don't like. I still need to treat myself like a baby sometimes in order to get proper adulting done, scolding myself for eating too many sweets and wanting to lay in bed all day. Those are still things I hate, but still have to deal with on a daily basis. Maybe I'm overthinking this. I just gotta go and eat my veggies before I can have my ice cream.

[intuitive-revelations]

Parallels

[lonesomenecromancer]

sif is almost just as mentally stable as me

[yourlocalabomination]

Tick Tock, Teddy-Bear.

[unofficially-ace]

I like to think I’m funny

(Song by Tom Cardy)

[feelo-fick]

chilaios telepathy compilation. btw.

also these ones arent telepathy i just think its fun that they defend eachother + are on the same page about alchohol :

[crabsnpersimmons]

still sick

drew myself another nurse to go with my nurse moon, this time a silly nurse sun!

once again couldn't decide between designs, so enjoy both!

[hmmbo]

profane form.

[hiding-under-the-willow]

Had a. very silly au idea while I was sick

[800db-cloud]

i’ve been wanting to do this since day one

[collophora]

TBB cadets ideas

[amelia-yap]

here

[whilomm]

i think that post-dragon stuff marcille would finally process that oh maybe shes in Love With Falin and (after going thru stages of denial and 'NO I DONT WANT TO RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP' etc etc) would eventually work up the courage to Begin Courting Falin in traditional romantic ways (just like in her elven romance novels) buying her gifts and taking her out on not-technically-dates and trying to be subtle but laying the groundwork for when she finally asks falin out on a date like a year and a half after the whole dragon thing and shes really nervous and scared but falins just like....arent we already dating

[bramblesnbones]

let them rest!!

[daily-odile]

FINALLY FINALLY HAPPY (VERY LATE) BIRTHDAY ODILE!!!!!

[inkskinned]

it just sucks because nothing is ever fucking made for you, and if it is made for you like 75% of the time it gets chopped into little pieces by every person alive because this is the one thing you have, so it has to prove itself to you.

like, a thing can't just be for women. men need to assign it to women. women have to experience "must" or "should" before their hobbies and passions - women are allowed to do silly, passive things like tuck our ankles and titter behind a fan, or something. women are allowed to, they are welcomed to. like the world is a house and we are supposed to be in the kitchen and now we are being given the divine right to enter the living room if we bring chips

because when it becomes for you, or about you, that is when the thing is vile. you should/must wear makeup so you can appear beautiful to men. once you wear makeup for yourself, or because you yourself enjoy putting it on, then you are no longer doing the right thing. there is a reason men hate certain fashion trends. there is a reason men hate things like the pumpkin spice latte - because it's not about them. you are buying it because it is good for you. they degrade your passions and interests. there is a reason women-led fields are largely seen as being "not a real" profession. when you are a good cook, that is because you can provide for him. close your eyes. you're not going to be a chef, be honest. that is a man making food for himself.

bras are made so breasts will be appealing to men. they are rarely about comfort or support. you have given up entirely on the idea of pockets. young girls have to worry about a shorter inseam on their shorts. a girl on instagram gets her septum pierced, and men in the comments are rabid about it - i just want to rip it out of her face. she'd be beautiful without it.

and fucking everything is for them. even the media that is "for you" is for them, eventually. remember "my little pony"? remember how hard it is to convince any executive to believe that little girls are worth selling to? in the media that is for you, you see little ways that you still need to make it accessible for them - the man is always powerful, smart, masculine. he is a man's man. the media usually forgives him. it usually says okay, some men are awful, but hey! gotta love 'em. because if you don't hold their hands and say "this is literally just a story about my lived reality", they shit their pants about it. they demand you put them into the media that's for you.

these are people who are so used to glutting themselves on the world. they are used to having every corner and every dollar and every place of leadership. so you say can i please have one slice of cake, just for myself, please, holy shit. and they fucking weep about it. they say you're being unfair, because some of their one-thousand-slices aren't beautiful, and your singular cake slice doesn't have their name on it. and aren't you being rude by not offering to share?

and honestly. fucking - yeah, man. you were kind of surprised, because the cake is a little basic (you bake at home, you're way past this stuff). but holy shit, it was nice just to be offered cake in the first place. you're used to having to starve. you're used to getting nothing, but going to the party anyway, because you're expected (professionally) to show up. you liked that it is a simple cake, and that it is warm, and mostly: you like that there is, for once, a cake-for-you.

in the real world, outside of metaphor, it feels like fucking being slapped. barbie didn't even say anything particularly unusual; it literally just made factually evident points. there are less women in leadership than men. we can look at that fact objectively. that is a real thing that is happening. and the movie is aware that it has to defend itself! that it has to spend like half an hour just turning to the camera and saying: i know this is hard for you to understand, but this is a real thing that women experience.

it's just - this is that one kid on the playground who thinks its allowed to hog all the toys. he builds this hoard that nobody else is allowed to even look at, or he'll get aggressive. everyone's a little scared of him, so they let it slide, because his daddy gave him the golden touch. he hates when people cry and thinks bullying is cool. he writes boys only! on a big sign and makes all his friends take "alpha male" classes.

and then girls pick up barbies, because there was nothing left for them. and in the void they've been given, with their scraps: they make long, spiraling narratives about how barbie is actually descended from snakes and has given her righteous followers magical (if concerning) powers and can speak 32 languages (2 of which are animal related) and has big plans for infrastructure (beginning with the local interstate). and the boy comes over, and he has a huge fit about how the girls aren't "including" him. he wants to know why the girls aren't making the story about ken.

"we didn't like your story." the girls blink at him. they point to his war stories and the gi joes and the millions of male-led narratives and how still in the modern day men get two-thirds of the speaking roles in movies and they point to men making mediocre shows that don't get lambasted and they point to men encouraging toxic masculinity and they point to men everywhere, men and men and men. and they say: "how is this our fault? you had ken."

"no!" he is already back to screaming and stomping his feet and tearing at his hair and intentionally reminding them that men are holding back thinly concealed violence and he says: "if it's not for me, it's actually sexism."