#anyway this has been an insane long ramble
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seeing news of the new sims pack has me like
because i had to delete all my sims data/mods/cc/remove the game from pc to try to save even a little bit of space (which barely still worked) but with a new pack adding a lot of the dating stuff i like,,,im thinking lowkey of maybe playing vanilla? 🤔🤔🤔 however i realize with my cc/mods gone, it'll FUCK over my previous saves 😭😭😭😭
#moony bun hours#like had saved a backup of my mods/cc but its prbly waaaaaaaaay out of date by now#just from the updates ea has been making n everything so#i also still kinda want the for rent pack#because i had an idea of all my storyworlds on one lot#but ive heard/seen how buggy it is and how it fucks with saves and man#also idk just thinking about managing the hotel/apt is a pain;;; but i want the stuff IN the pack ykno?#had originally looked into gettin a usb#i have an sd card and it works but still sims + everything else takes up space + i had wanted to get other games on steam#and thats a whole other rabbit hole before i decided to just stick to my switch#but point is i miss sims so im thinking about usb again#but they always break because they stick out/so i was looking into ones that are flush to the port#but reviews are mixed#so now im back to thinking about trying to clear my sd card some and see if i can download sims to it#its been a pain trying to configure sim stuff to a different location 😭😭😭😭 because no matter what i do it'll create a folder on desktop??#which yeah okay makes sense ig#but like hhhhh that almost defeats the purpose of moving it to a diff location so i could use cc#and i know there are tutorials and i have watched them#but ya bun is not the most savvy or smart to follow so kdjbnkjnbgfn#anyway this has been an insane long ramble#its 3am and im thinking about sims#i was thinking of clearing up my sd card anyway so maybe its fortuitous timing
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birthday boy 🎂
#river dipping#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#a burning house to live in#echthroi#ts4#ts4 edit#simblr#ts4 screenshots#theo i hope you're having the most insane birthday sex rn i hope it's ******** and ***** and ***'** **** *** **** ***** :)<3#sorry i put off making your birthday edit for so long that i had to pivot and post this edit instead of the one i wanted </3#...very funny how similar this is to that LAST render i posted... well so WHAT!! if i think matthias looming is sexy!!#this is based on a photo that everyone was drawing their ocs as so really it's not MY fault he's back there clinging and being a freak#actually if y'all want this pose lmk... i'll share it but fyi it's only meant to be seen from the waist up and idk how it'd look#on a sim that doesn't have the same muscle mass and like. bulk. that matthias has......................................#just got rock hard after typing that... anyway.#HAPPY BIRTHDAY THEO <333333333 LOVE YOU SO MUCH I PROMISE I'M GONNA KEEP WORKING ON THE //ACTUAL// BIRTHDAY EDIT!! like .#posted abt this on the sideblog but the real edit i have planned for him is making me lose my fucking gourd#and it'll probably take me :))) a few more days to figure out#expect a depressing theo-as-a-teenager edit eventually tho. with writing!! accompanying it!!#matthias's face has changed again btw 😭 i redid it almost immediately after i posted that first render attempt so he looks DIFFERENT!!#i posted screenshots of him in cas just the other day on my other acc and he looks so good in them i might post them here too#oh and!! this edit looks massively different than my last because this screenshot was taken with a new preset i made specifically for#the real birthday edit i'm working on... it's a hallway scene so i figured out depth and density to get this really cool fog effect#i'm really excited for it!! in my head the way it looks makes me crazy but idk if i can pull it off properly. but like i WAS SAYING!!#new preset is sooo sexy after i post this i'll reblog with the before and after to show you how good it looks even w/o any editing#like. the colors....... literally have always wanted a preset like this i'm so glad i spent yesterday fucking around with it#ALSO!! i've been doing those oc/ship dynamic templates for fun recently so i might post a few of them here soon#realize i'm rambling so much in these tags bc i haven't been here in forever kfjnkfjhn ummmmm. let me stop.#EVERYONE WISH THEO HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIGHT NOW 🫵‼
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everyone come play in the roleswap au with me
#anyways. the idea here is that shamsiel is the Chosen and shay is the Divine#while canon shamsiel is still trying to convince herself that the bureaucracy is good and the earth is bad#this shay realized that the bureaucracy was wrong a long time ago and is trying to subtly work against them.#and then while canon shay is jaded re: his destiny#swap shamsiel is really into the idea that she has this Greater Purpose#so it creates this dynamic of like. angel who has been asked to guard a charge who is#unknowingly Really Enthusiastic about bringing about the end of the world#sorry for tag rambling. i’ve been insane about this swap and will continue to be#oh also in this au their names are different. shamsiel is joan and shay is kalaziel#business names and true names you know how it is#fremont county tag#oc art#motw
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whshdfhfjf.,,,
#close up!! because i firstly Did Not render them with such insanity in order for tumblr's lack of general resolution to make it blur#look at all the lines!!! teehee i still really really like this style of digital painting it's super super fun to do!!! and also secondly#because i went back and added a tag ramble and as i seem to often be doing??? lately?? reached the 30 tag limit and went 'hm ok how else..'#anyway the tag essay on that one is now up and talks about the artwork generally and miscellaneous thoughts!! that said. i need a space to#ramble about beatrix at Length because look you don't draw and paint etc a character for like ten hours without having a lot of thoughts#anyways ! i digress terrifically. tag rambles are more like trains of thoughts masquerading as subways and you get on and it's unfortunately#a rollercoaster track. but this is My Blog and i can do Whatever I Want as long as i don't hurt anyone <- affirmations!! also Harm Principle#lately it's been like *kicks up feet* *opens tumblr tags* *treats it as own personal journal* and tbh Good for me!! anyways back to beatrix#fun fact ! the thing that pushed me over the edge to go watch the musical after looking through the tumblr tag was a very specific poll.#and the fact that the winning option was blue hair and pronouns made me double over laughing so hard i had to go see the source material#mm i feel like lately the academic Context has been tossing me essentially into a blender HAHA ;-; so everyone in adamandi is to some extent#a Mood. but bea-specific (haha be specific)(sorry!)(wow this is the same reaction mechanism of my friend who points out innuendos)(...)#i think it's the wanting to prove herself. like from the whole abuela etc thing there's proof here she's got a Stable Support System of sort#and instead what beatrix continues to do is push themselves. 'i guess u could say i'm married to my work? god that's depressing' // no one#here to enforce that // abuela tells me to rest says i'm constantly stressed and i'll just get depressed like before but i still have to try#like. that shred of desperation that pushes you to the brink to neglect yourself (well i guess physically but also your morals..) and like!!#the whole 'lose half your soul thing' proves she's self aware!! like they know what they're doing is super dubious yknow! but they're still#they're still doing it even if it goes into conflict with their morality system in a way and then they justify it to themselves (see pt 1#of ghostwriter) and the whole wanting to achieve at all costs Despite the self awareness. (i think? this aspect also applied to quincy. but#thoughts on him will come later). more beatrix specific also is the fact that they genuinely adore their work.. 'i just love it here where#you know they'll be printing forever and you are just part of it' because that does kind of resonate with me. also the being behind in the#competition is real!!! i'm maybe talking about Art as a subject because that same drive for it exists on my good days i think. even#even when nothing seems to be going right and you've ended up at the back the intent passion inherent in what you do is still there!!!#the genuine. care she has for reporting. is so !!!!! to me... other beatrix thoughts include 'why reveal yourself at the end' aka vincent's#'u should have stayed silent u had a smart plan' like rip to them but i would not // it feels with bea's complex character i can't imagine h#her Not doing that. like the guilt is real i guess. and i am running out of tags but! smth also about her fervent hope or smth that she'll#eventually get to where she wants. and the resilient determination.. 'i won't let their deaths be pointless there's more good i'm gonna do'#they're so so real for that. i'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing; seeing myself reflected in aspects of characters like this.. but it's#it's there regardless. smth smth just make your peace with the person you are ig!! tldr beatrix campbell my beloved. hehe#adamandi
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YAYYY MISHA THEME!!!
MISHA 💖💓🩷❤️💕💖💓🩷💖❤️💖💓💓💖🩷💓
#i loevev them so much did you know that#currently saving up for him and it is HELL after spending it all on sparkel .so many quests and not enough timw .........#and . ouhhh havent had the chance to talk abt . shit what is it called . lemme go see real quick .#A CHILDS DREAM . yknow that one map with the text on the walls and the melted clocks and stuff .#that was done . SO incredibly well it makes me INSANE...........#so like . im 100.1% sure the speaker (who talks abt mikhail a lot) in that room is misha.#like that IS her voice right . im not going insane#its just . auuh... the dreams (or at least golden hour) in peacony are so childlike .... like . some of the puzzles are jigsaw puzzle ;#turn into a small cartoon character ; and help the cartoon character find his cartoon gears .#and then you get to clockie . who can only be seen by someone w a childs innoence (or smth around those lines)#and that misha can see clockie . which like . cool right ? yeab. UNTIL YOU GET TO A CHILDS DREAM ..#where theres something just ... sososo off .#and its ... its just gotta be misha . its gotta be . idk if theres anything outside of main story im missing (there probably is)#BUT . augh . auf even .#childs dream still has these childlike qualities to it (the paper birds; walking on walls) but just ... more warped#(the general atmosphere of the place; the monsters even .)#the music having a music box to make the tone of the song more distressing ... how its so much more smaller than golden hour ..#aughhhhhh ... its just such a good parallel..... i could talk abt it all day really .#anyways . i WAS going to tell u abt my misha theory (which may or may not be confirmed) bu t i got DISTRACTED.#uhh anyways . my theory is that misha is somehow trapped in peacony .#when misha goes onto the parlor car they mention that theyve never been outside of peacony before and that she can t stay for long .#which i imagine is very normal! BUT its this combined w her lock motif (pupils; most of the doors in childs dream) thag make me suspicious#i mentioned before that golden hour has a very childish quality to it. and that misha has that childish quality.#okay well . what if mishas being kept there so that golden hour can keep on being a dream for other people?#and so that would make golden hour mishas dream. (or part of his dream? could be more people the familys keeping)#and that would imply that childs dream is . well . mishas nightmare .#uhm . i think thats it ..? if i come up w anything else ill . ramble abt it somewhere . definitely not the most eloquent but#i hope i got the point across <33#i think its an understatement to say i love misha . i LOVE MISHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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pet peeves: drawing people yellow
#advanced sorry as a non artist who doesnt really understand all that lighting shit#but even with weird lighting:#you can make their skin tone different from the pale shown in canon without it being like lemon colored T_T_T_T_T_T#similarly it's so possible to draw darker skin tones without making them gray or all have the same undertone#also i swear if it's for the palette/color theory you can also make palettes and color well without making it... yellow#ramblings!#this has happened in both my fandoms (honestly more frequently than i like but whatever)#& it just annoys me sm lmfaoooofnjksdhgkj#partially blaming one very popular drawing tutorial abt how to draw easian (the tutorial said asian but its rlly just easian......) faces &#im sorry the faces look like lemons#it just................... annoys me#mfw get u a face that looks like 🟡#this has been in the queue for a really long time bc im . v on the fence abt posting like#i feel like half the time it's not on purpose but it also drives me up the wall also i feel like if people simply paid more attention it#wouldn't happen! well. anyways#whatever this is one of those insane rants that i just need to get out#this is what happens when i occasionally search tags it's just. (sees art) (sideeyes you) (moves on) . whatever lol#not genshin#to be clear this is abt easian coded/easian characters like if a char specifically is described as 'sallow skin' or smth#then it's whatever but it just makes me slightly go 'hmm' if nothing about the character indicates unhealthy skin coloration but u go: 🟡
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Feeling insane and sappy rn
edit: aforementioned opal (it's very pretty!)
#cherri rambles#i am seriously#my emotional state has been a little unstable recently but the comment just hit me in a way that i think I had to contact the seller.#I usually don't becasue I don't like bothering people (nobody likes random messages)#But you know the tunmblr posts that are longing and full of showing how humanity is#this is it#SO ya anyways feeling insane about connections and the inherent kindness people show to even random strangers on the internet.#he was a teacher and also polished opals (as mentioned in the seller description)
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you ever watch an entire video essay and come out of it literally not knowing what the conclusion was meant to be, and find yourself yearning for like 2017 when it didnt feel like everyone and their nan were making video essays?
#kai rambles#im just#it was an hour long#i watched it for an hour#he contradicted himself every new chapter and literally nothing he said followed on from what he said before#there was a conclusion#no idea what it was#ahhhhhhhh#similarly the other say youtube recommended me the uh authoritarianism video by second thought#the videos about 23 minutes long#he doesnt mention nazi germany until minute 18#he also just makes incomparable comparisons between the ussr and modern day america#and like hes very charitable to the fucking soviet union#he also claims that modern day chinese police havent killed anyone in years which like i get that theres a lot of anti china propaganda#in the us and its not as bad as its made out to be but its still an authoritarian dictatorship#like i get america bad but also other countries can also be bad??#anyway the guy basically equates authoritarianism to socialism which o-fucking-kay then#youtube has been recommending me more leftist commentators recently and so many of them are just insanely ignorant americans#whose entire politics can be summed up as ''america bad'' and they get so caught up reminding you of that every thirty seconds that they#just come out with wild takes like north korea good actually or the war in ukraine was because america wouldn't stop aggressing russia#so yeah they shouldnt have invaded but it wasnt unwarranted and part of ukraine is ethnically russian anyway#like sir????? why are you repeating russian propaganda???? what youre saying it literally neo nazi propaganda what the fuck???#i heard that one a week ago and its still in my fucking head like jesus fucking chridt
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no like when I say any answer on the queerest city poll that’s not San Fran is wrong I mean it is factually and historically WRONG
#just. look at the history of lgbt rights and major events in queer history in the us#and I’m telling you it is. in fact. dominated by San Francisco#the other cities that contend for the most part are major us cities that contend simply because they are big and/or heavily populated#like yeah obviously dense cities are going to have a higher number of people in various demographics. im thinking mostly about nyc and#Chicago here for the most part#San Fran is not big. it’s dense but not nearly an nyc level population especially historically.#it’s very unique for having been a safehaven for queers for a long time in comparison to the rest of the country#now I am not. by any means. defending it on every front. or considering it superior in any other way basically. I am SOLELY talking about#it’s unrivaled huge and powerful and long-standing queer community#it is- in the present day- literally almost impossible to live in San Francisco. period. it is absurdly expensive.#it’s homelessness situation especially due to the insane cost of living and there takeover of tech companies and so on#is horrific and for no damn reason (the city has enough money to house people Easily through at LEAST the heavy tourism)#the queer COMMUNITY there is what’s important and it’s history of demanding rights and generally flourishing through their own efforts#anyway idk why I felt the need to ramble about this#actually yes I do it’s becuase I think a lot of younger queer people (or queer people who grew up in isolated or conservative areas don’t#know the history associated with San Francisco and why people regard it as being so fundamentally queer#like the fact that portland is in second on that poll- and this is coming from someone who likes portland overall- is so weird to me#it’s a very progressive place but boy it ain’t got the influence and history that San Fran- or even New York or chicago- have#again it’s hard to compare those big big cities to anything but nonetheless#tangential but. sacramento is also a queer-dense city and though we are small and not nearly as flashy as the other contenders it’s worth#noting I think for being more of a safehaven than people tend to think about#anyway. that’s nothing I just had to represent for a second#kibumblabs
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and if we got to see sawashiro daddy up on aoki just Once i think i wouldve cheered, applauded even
#snap chats#i mean im gonna draw it but LMAO#god i have too many things i want to draw this week but i guess thats what happens when i dont draw for a while#it hasnt even been that long has it- maybe three days max#anyways no lemme explain#i guess i'll spoil one of the four things i plan on drawing#anyways no i would have. LOVED to be a fly on the wall during the conversation where aoki asks sawashiro to kill arakawa#like... my god jo finally telling his son no that's insane. AND WHEN AOKI'S STILL SEETHING ABOUT THE DISSOLUTION#CAUSE MASUMI WAS KILLED /THAT NIGHT/ LIKE TENDO AND ISHIODA HAULED ASS TO KILL HIM LMAO#ouuuggghgh i wanna think of it more i wanna draw it so bad but i have a meeting in five minutes#i have to be normal but i cant ouugugghhg arakawa family stop corroding my brain#oh since we're here and i wont get a chance to ramble bout it again :)#yesterday i /was/ going to get a cake from my fave shoppe but they were closed for the day#but when i went back they were restocking the fridge and while i was debating on what to get#block was ravin bout their puddin and when i went to buy it after bein Thoroughly Convinced even the cashiers were super stoked#i mean makes sense to hype up your own product but still. its lil things like that that made me happy#esp when i woke up feeling dead inside ☠️ BUT YEAH meeting time theeeen i guess i'll draft that and watch more kinpika#ok bye bye
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i cant even like post about the horrors that are going on currently because im gonna get too mad but oh my god. like i would give her really good credit for writing a character like marius that has 0 self awareness about his insanely disgusting behavior bc like. that CAN work. you can make the reader feel disgust and see things through the eyes of someone who is horrible while not romanticizing the behavior. clearly anne did not get the memo for this one.
#twist rambles#vc posting#like i get now why the blog i was going thru the liveblog of to decide if i wanted to commit to the bit was so so glad to be done w this#book bc this is like. i genuinely cannot express how mad i am reading this lmao. quite honestly i thought mer.rick was bad and thats nothin#compared to this. i know the next one will also be rough but oh my god. oh my god. why did i commit to this. i really may have to start my#silly notes project sooner > later because i need to actually enjoy something because like. i just. god. i cannot really clearly get into#why this pisses me off without going into insane (and prob triggering) depth w mar.ius as a character but like. my godddd oh we are in hell#like i remember when i was reading the wit.cher books i was like wow the SA is really excessive. dont like that and how it keeps happening#to minors. this book makes that seem like a cakewalk w nothing wrong. this makes tva which had like... i think 10 sex scenes before pg 100#and all of them were horrific to read seem like just fine and dandy. i need anne to explode#you can tell im suffering bc i weirdly dont like posting abt the positives bc these books DO have them dont get me wrong but i dont normall#have as much 2 say when im like oh this is fun im enjoying this. and i dont really want to get any of my mutuals into the books im gonna be#honest bc theyre bad. but you can tell when im posting a lot that im in the TRENCHES. which is why ive been posting a billion times today#abt this bc its like... interesting? but also i have a lot to say. and there just rly isnt much positive abt this book in particular#nor the last one to be fair but this is like easily the most miserable ive been. with tva i could at least go yeah maybe its just anne#trying to depict an absuive relationship w the rose tinted glasses that arm.and has bc of how long hes been abused. but w this its just lik#mar.ius being like yeah im such a good guy while hes going after like his 4th minor. im so sick of itttt im so sick of it.#good lord sorry my tags have been so long today but thats bc i think im done ranting in the main post and then get another thing im mad abt#that i need to add. like idk i think while these books infuriate me at points at least i have shit to say abt it yk#anyways good god. i have to wrap up this chapter.
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no euphoria for two years (best case scenario???) is still weighing on me
#i need to get my panic attacks and relatable content and insane teen behavior from an OUTSIDE source not an internal source#anyways. time jump theory is obviously real though lmao#it was as good as confirmed not too long ago by some makeup or clothes artists i think#we shall see tho#but weird if jacob is really getting in shape for euphoria if it’s that far out#oh well#i know they don’t shoot all in order and probably they’re on different schedules since they’re all becoming stars#(ik zendaya has Been a star but the others)#anyways im rambling#personal
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New Fic coming vv soon!
If you are looking for a motorcycle/carshow Hyungwon fic- you have came to the right place.
I am not kidding to you guys when I say I wrote a Hyungwon fic from 3pm this evening to 3am almost 4am today. Although I did take a collective of a four break. I am being absolutely honest when I say it is completely self-indulgent. I'll give you some foreground rn. I always go to a car show with my dad in the winter/spring part of the year. It's huge, well sometimes he'll start talking to someone and brain has always imagined what'd be like to be with a s/o. And I always told myself I'd write a fic- and I've been saying that since I was kid. And finally motorcycle Hyungwon has reached levels of brain rot that are unimaginable so I can write them down. If you are reading this Kebbi- you know how bad it is. I am not joking. So, I have one last read over tomorrow with a clear mind and I'll be ready to post it. (I'll prolly cue it for 10:00 Monday Morning est tbh!)
I just wanted to let you know that it has not let me rest. I literally incorporated so many parts/aspects of it that I could, it's insane. Although, I tried not to make it pertain to me and tried to make it like the average person's favorite cars. So, I didn't include any of my favorite cars (I'm not kidding when I say I've been going to this car show since I was in a stroller) (If you are wondering two of my favorites are the Galaxie 500 and the 65' fast back mustangs). So this is vv reader friendly just absolutely self-indulgent if that makes any sense!
And I know some may not be as knowledgeable in cars, so I really tried to make it simple! I will include a foreword. So, like certain things are explained! If any other terms need to be explained, please send me an ask or a message. (Because some things I don't think need an explanation- may need one!)
Lastly, if I'm not careful my brain will make me continue to write this until I'm no longer on brain rot- but on brain dead.
#new fic soon!#idk i felt like an update would be nice#i absolutely rambled on about it#i'm just thankful i was able to pull myself away to read and eat ngl-#i got to listen to some new songs too which was nice not relevant but i got to say it somewhere-#literally i've been pushing myself to write and just have had horrible writer's block- until it hit me over the head countlessly this morn#ing- it's a writer's possession- i'm telling you-#anyways look forward to monday!#because there is no way I'll get up early enough to have this posted for tomorrow- esp considering it's 4 am...#h.one puts me through horrible fits of brain rot- last time i wrote about him i stayed up all night ofc it was partly cause it was due the#next day here- but also because he doesn't let me rest until i finish writing about him 😭#i haven't written these many words in such a long time 😭#kate rambles#rambles#fic update#and if you made it this far you get to know it's 5.5k+ :) my brain is insane#insane in the membrane- what do we do we swim~ ha ha hahaha swim#sorry i lost it there for a good second#anyways good night have a good day- i'll see you all later-
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SECOND THAT
luke castellan x reader
★ “i’m restless, i’m wrestling with the song that you love, it’s been stuck in my head”
ABOUT - luke castellan is the only one at camp who sees right through your perfect and poised persona; and all he wants is the satisfaction of ruining it.
WARNINGS - smut, mentions of choking, both the reader and luke are TERRIBLE but luke is much worse lol, swearing, written from the perspective of a deranged luke, penetration, only loosely proofread.
A/N- i have NEVER written and posted smut before EVER. like i get close but i never go all out. so… no hate guys 😘 also i feel like this is a bit ooc for luke so just pretend he’s actually insane and terrible guys!!! if you ignore his incoherent ramblings, it’s PWOP sooo… anyways this might be the first and last time i ever write smut who knows
luke castellan is no amateur when it comes to pretending to be something else. growing up, the only thing that mattered to luke was receiving praise or recognition for being ‘great’ or ‘honourable’ or whatever.
when you live your whole life pretending to be a perfect person, you kinda start to believe you really are a perfect person.
and if everyone you meet also believes you are indeed a perfect person, what’s the harm in continuing to pretend?
at the end of the day, both parties gain something. you get the validation and acclaim that you truly deserve, and they get a role model they aspire to at least halfway resemble.
luke is the sweetest guy at camp- everyone loves him. and he deserves it, doesn’t he? he deserves their praise and love and respect. gods, he should be rewarded for pretending to be so admirable for so long. he’s entitled to it.
you, on the other hand? you don’t. you don’t deserve an ounce of the praise luke has worked so hard to receive.
to luke, you’re vermin. behind your polite smiles and sweet words, there’s darkness. there’s an evil lurking within you- he’s sure of it.
he sees it during early morning sparring sessions, watching from the wings while you tactfully dodge every attack that comes your way. and when you eventually falter, he sees how your eyes turn cold and your smile fades.
he sees how you take a shaky breath, brushing yourself off with your bony hands before flashing a toothy grin. he feels nauseous when you extend your arm out to shake the hand of your opponent- because how the fuck can they believe your little act?
your gentle kindness and bashful charisma is so obviously fake. of course, he’s not pissed that you’re acting; everyone at camp is acting to an extent. but you’re going all out, and he can still see through it. what pisses him off, is that nobody else seems to recognise how truly malicious you can be.
maybe it’s because you’re pretty. luke is no stranger to getting special treatment based on his appearance, and neither should you be. maybe that’s the whole basis of your appeal. it seems to be the only thing holding your pathetic little facade together, considering your sloppy acting skills.
if you were ugly everyone would be able to call out your bullshit straight away, and then he wouldn’t have to worry about sharing the spotlight. honestly, the only reason why everyone loves you so much is because half of them want to fuck you, and the other half want your attention or approval- not that it’d be worth anything.
it was the last week of spring, meaning only the year-rounders and a few of the older kids were at camp. you just graduated high school, and arrived at camp early.
of course, you just had to return to camp prettier, taller, more confident, and with a fancy college acceptance letter. maybe you were much smarter than you let on- but it became very apparent that your intelligence wasn’t the reason you got accepted into NYU once he learned what you were studying.
“oh, i’m getting a degree in art history,”
seriously? art history? that’s gotta be the funniest thing luke has ever heard in his entire life.
“really? why art history?” he asks politely, watching your every move as he awaits your dumbass explanation.
you shrug cheerfully, looking around at the few other campers scattered around in a tight-knit circle as they wait for you to tell them about your ‘lovely’ 18th birthday and ‘eventful’ senior year.
“i don’t know, my mum works with a lot of artists, so she said it’d be a good conversation starter,” you say cheerfully, as if it wasn’t the stupidest thing to ever exit your mouth.
luke can’t help but let out a little giggle, before instantly lowering his head to offer some non-verbal apology. but to his surprise, you laugh along. “yeah, i really wanna score a job at the MET or something. i don’t mind either way,”
luke nods politely, letting the conversation continue without interrupting with a snide comment or unsolicited laughter.
he plays along as the conversation continues, pretending he doesn’t want to grab you by the throat and push you against the wall, demanding you to confess. demanding you to tell the fucking truth; that you’re a manipulative sycophant who’s bound to end up in rehab for getting addicted to designer drugs.
why is he the only one that sees you for who you truly are? gods, if he knew any better he might be charmed. you were naturally picturesque- or at least you seemed to be. the way that you were sitting on the grass with your hair draping over your body; you looked gorgeous. but you always look gorgeous, that’s your best quality after all.
of course all of camp half-blood was fooled- you were to pretty and kind to be lying. maybe it was better to let them keep on believing that you were this perfect image of a girl.
but he’d still appreciate the satisfaction of seeing you for who you are- seeing you in your rawest form.
and then suddenly, he saw it. some athena girl asked you if you wanted to go on a run with her later, to which you politely declined. of course, you kept your composure, told her that you had to take a nap, offered her a sympathetic smile and a ‘maybe next time’. but she didn’t see the way your eyes rolled to the back of your head as soon as she looked away.
luke was astonished. you really were getting sloppy, huh?
and yet, nobody else saw it. nobody else saw the look of disgust on your face as soon as she finished talking. he was seething- how on earth could everyone be so blind?
luke looks around at the group of people surrounding him, his eyes darting back to you ever 5 or 10 seconds. they all look at you with awe- as if you’re the most precious thing on earth.
fuck that. he was going to put you in your place.
a few hours pass, and it was finally time for everyone to walk back to their cabins.
luke spots you walking alone to your cabin, your face dimly lit by the moon as it shines over the camp. he’s so overwhelmed with anger, he couldn’t fathom caring about the consequences of whatever situation he was about to put himself in.
he quickly catches up to you, meeting your walking pace as he shoots you a friendly smile.
“hey, y/n. you got a minute?” luke asks, still adorning that charming smile. you smile back at him, nodding your head ever so gently, as if it would fall off if you moved it too fast. like a rusty elvis bobble head bought 1976 that resides on the dash of your grandmother’s busted car.
“yeah, why?” you hold your hands behind your back as you walk beside him, slowly approaching your empty cabin. luke shrugs his shoulders. “oh, i just had a little question. mind if we talk in your cabin?” he asks.
you nod, opening the door for luke and letting him walk through. you close the door behind him, before leaning your back against the wall. luke stands in front of you, his cheery demeanour vanishing as he crosses his arms.
“why the fuck are you such a little bitch all the time?”
you furrow your brows, mirroring his posture as you cross your arms defensively. “excuse me?”
luke rolls his eyes, letting out dry laughter as he looks you up and down. “you heard me,” he adds, watching you anxiously begin to pick at your lips with your freshly manicured fingernails.
“do you have a problem with me or something?” your whole body feels tense as you continue picking at your lips, your eyes locked onto his.
“yeah, i do have a problem. i’m tired of your little ‘nice girl’ act. it’s getting fucking annoying,” luke scoffed, taking a step closer towards you. your eyes darken, before shaking away your hostile expression.
“are you sure you wanna do this right now, castellan?”
“is that a threat?”
you pull your fingertips away from your lips, shifting your weight to the other side of your body as you cross your arms once more. you let silence fill the room before finally speaking up.
“listen, luke. everyone pretends to be someone they’re not. you and i just tend to do it more than others-“
luke cuts your off, taking another step forwards. “fuck off, we are not the same.”
you roll your eyes, banging your head against the wall as you groan irritably. “so what? are you gonna go around spreading cheap lies about me now?” you ask tiredly. luke shakes his head, slightly shrugging his shoulders.
“nah.” he replies curtly, his voice blunt and expression vague. “mkay, then what the fuck is your problem?”
luke takes another quick step forward, tightly holding your chin in his hand as he lifts your head to face him. “you’re my fucking problem.”
you let out a dry laugh, staring into his eyes as you attempt to intimidate him. “you’re such a loser.” you whisper, refusing to fight back against the way he’s gripping your face.
he stays silent, biting his lip as he looks over your form. “and you’re a brat.” he retorts.
“are we just going to keep throwing insults back and forth all night, or are you gonna explain why you’re so obsessed with me?” you ask playfully, cupping his face in your hand as an attempt to patronise him.
luke is stumped. to be fair, he is entirely obsessed with you. and he has been for years now. and now he has you cornered, watching your weak attempts at asserting dominance over him.
luke was over it.
suddenly, luke leans in, harshly pressing his lips against yours. you retract your hand from his face, pressing it against the wall as you feel his body moving towards you.
he wraps his other hand around your neck, only gently gripping it as to not alarm you.
luke is surprised by how you sink into his grip, pulling away to see your closed eyes and swollen lips. when you wipe your mouth and look at him with those hauntingly innocent eyes, he’s almost fooled.
you scoff, smirking as you tear away from his grip and take a few steps back. “is that all you wanted?” you say confidently, watching him turn around to watch you carefully pace around the room.
he shakes his head, groaning quietly as he walks over to you once more.
luke purses his lips, trying to suppress any sense of genuine attraction to you. but when his eyes gaze over to your red lips and flushed cheeks, he can’t help but let his mind wander.
“if you’re done, you can leave, castellan.” you say irritably, leaning against your bed frame.
it goes straight to his dick when you call him that, especially when your voice sounds so hoarse and cocky. he feels as though he’s finally accomplished what he’s been yearning to do for years now. he’s seeing the real you.
he couldn’t dare squander this opportunity now.
he pushes you down onto your bed, watching how your hair flows over your newly made bedsheets as your head hits the pillow.
“but you don’t want me to leave, do you?” luke says lowly, hovering over your body as his hand hold your wrists together above your head.
“i don’t care what you do, castellan.”
luke groans, pressing another rough kiss against your lips. you kiss back for whatever reason, and your firsts relax within his grip. it was almost as if you got off on the idea of someone calling out your bullshit. or maybe you got off on the idea of somewhat hating your guts. either way, luke knew you were more than eager to continue.
he let go of your wrists, before biting your bottom lip. your mouth opens slightly, offering entry to his tongue, deepening the kiss.
you hand cups his face, while the other grips his shoulder. after a few moments, he pulls away and begins sucking at the skin of your neck, leaving purple marks on your delicate skin while you let out hoarse whimpers.
his hands begin to fiddle with the fabric of your shirt, causing you to push his body forwards as you position yourself to sit on his lap. you take off your shirt, throwing it away as you run your hands down his back.
luke looks down at your chest, growing more aroused at the sight of your lacy little bra. it’s as if you knew someone was going to see it.
you feel a hardness growing from under his jeans, poking against your upper thigh as you slowly grind against his lap. luke let’s put a low moan, continuing to bury his face in your neck.
“i fucking hate you,” he growls, gripping the sides of your waist with his hands as you move against him.
“don’t care, take off your shirt,” you demand hurriedly, running your fingers through his hair as you tilt his head up to look at you.
luke rolls his eyes, before taking off his shirt. he quickly presses another series of harsh kissses against your neck, fiddling with the clasp of your bra as you push your chest up against his. you giggle softly at his incompetence, before he finally unhooks it and ravenously pulls it from your chest.
luke pushes your body backwards onto the bed, trailing kisses down from your neck and onto your tits. you let out a quiet moan, before biting down onto your hand in order to stifle the sound. his large hands knead your left breast, while the other grips the area just under your right breast, resting on top of your ribcage.
luke’s hands slowly move downwards, hip thumb tracing circles against the side of your hip as you gently grasp onto his hair. his fingertips gently pull down your shorts, leaving you in only your underwear.
he rubs his thumb over the wet fabric, before tilting his head to look up at you. “pathetic,” he mutters, smirking at your flushed faced. you groan, burying the back of your head further into the pillow as your back arches involuntarily.
luke’s thumb massages your clit from over the soaking fabric, watching you squirm in response. he lets out a dry laugh, before pulling down your panties and tossing them onto the floor.
“luke…” you moan quietly, closing your eyes as your hips jerk into the mattress. his fingers trace your wet folds, before letting his thumb rub circles against your clit and forcing two fingers inside of you.
you whimper before pursing your lips, rolling your head around as he slowly pumps his fingers in and out. he quickens his pace, pressing down harshly against your clit while beginning to suck on the skin of your upper thigh.
luke holds down your hip with his free hand as you begin to squirm.
suddenly, he stops.
you look at him with a confused expression, your face red as he pulls his fingers out. he chuckles at your disappointed face, before taking off his pants and boxers. you stare at his length unashamedly, biting down on your bottom lip.
“so fucking needy.” he says lowly, his voice horse as he softly begins to continue massaging your clit. you moan, feeling your back arch as he positions himself in front of your legs. he forcefully spreads them open as he teases your folds with the tip of his erect member.
you let out a little whine, your voice trembling as you try to move your hips against his length.
luke rolls his eyes at your poor attempts at penetration, before slowly pushing his cock into your entrance. you let out a breathy, high pitched moan, your hands eagerly gripping your bedsheets.
he gradually pushes in the entirety his length, continuing to rub circles into your clit. luke tightly grips your waist as he begins to slowly pull out, before jamming himself back in. you let out a breathy yelp as you body moves with his thrusts.
like continues relentlessly pushing in and out of you, massaging your waist as his thumb gradually increases the speed of its attack on your clit.
you try to steady you breathing, your face flushed as lukewarm continues to deliberately overwhelm your body.
“mm… luke, i’m gonna…” you mutter, your hips jerking upwards. he smiles at you, amused by how blissed out you look taking his cock. “so soon?” he teases, rapidly moving against your body.
you let out a stammering series of whimpers as your back arches upwards, feeing yourself suddenly release. luke grins, continuing to rub circles into your clit as he rides out your orgasm.
luke slowly retracts his thumb, repositioning the hand to gently grip your hip. he begins to slow down his movements, before quickly thrusting into you repetitively. you squirm, the movements of your hips constrained by his grip.
suddenly, he pulls out, releasing onto your stomach. see? he was a gentleman.
luke gazes over at the girl he just reduced to a panting mess as he stands up and puts his clothes back on. he smiles at you as he zips up his jeans, before kneeling besides you as you turn your head to look at him.
“i wont tell anyone how fucking pathetic you are, don’t worry, princess.”
you nod, staring at him as he continues to look at your defenceless body. “such a pretty girl,” he hums, cupping your face in his hand before kissing your forehead.
he reaches over to your discarded underwear and gently pulls them up your legs, the gesture acting somewhat as a peace offering. he takes a step back, simply taking in how endearingly stupid you look.
you slowly sit yourself up, grabbing your camp t shirt and putting it on. “goodnight, luke,” you choke out, your voice hoarse and breathing shallow. he nods, smiling softly as he turns to walk away. “night, princess.”
#luke castellan enemies to lovers#luke castellan x y/n#luke castellan x you#luke castellan fic#luke castellan smut#luke castellan imagine#luke castellan imagines#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#luke castellan x reader smut#pjo#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#percy series#pjo x reader#pjo tv show
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#so i just woke up from a really fucking shitty dream starring my ex#i have no idea where the fuck that came from but apparently my subconscious has some stuff to resolve#it was so realistic why can i not get some peace from the guy#it’s been really good in terms of not thinking about him and feeling more and more indifferent towards him#but every once in a while my dreams just stab me in the back#i’ve been so restless and anxious since i woke up it’s insane#how can he still have this effect on me after all this time???#anyway i’m gonna go have desert for breakfast and take a very long shower to wash this shit off of me#my ramblings
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Okay but real talk the black heart being about Billy actually makes Agathario even more compelling sorry y'all don't have an imagination.
I mean, the implications of Rio not technically being in the coven??? From what I understand, a coven is supposed to be a sisterhood, a group of witches dedicated to each other above all else. Rio is not dedicated to these people. She is not here for them. Rio is death and death has no coven but she still came. She came because Agatha summoned her, not because the coven needed a new green witch. (This also means the coven never actually needed a green witch since I'm presuming Billy isn't one. They didn't need Rio but Agatha called her anyway)
Rio has no loyalty to the other witches, she is there for Agatha and Agatha alone and I am SO hoping they get to show that on screen in some way.
Also the black heart itself isn't a huge plot point or a character moment, but Agatha's reaction to it certainly is. She sees a black heart on a list of names that are supposed to be her coven and she immediately thinks of Rio. Billy presses her about the fourth name and she would rather eat paper than do literally anything normal. Like, we know Agatha is an incredible liar, she should have been able to easily come up with something to tell him but she was so thrown off by the idea that the name might be Rio that the only thing she could think to do was to eat the list. That is insane behavior who cares if it wasn't actually about Rio because Agatha's actions were about her. That tells you infinitely more about them than a list of names.
Also just. Logistically. It makes way more sense like why wouldn't Lilia just write Rio Vidal? I know it works for the drama of it all but I was wondering if they were going to give an in-universe reason or just leave it as a weird plot hole. But who's the one person a witch can't name? Also, Billy told Eddie nothing in his life felt normal until they met, so it makes sense that the symbol she would use to represent him, the most accurate way to refer to Billy, is the affectionate inside joke between him and the only person who makes him feel normal (I could ramble for just as long about how Billy being the black heart makes his character and his relationship with Agatha so much more compelling as well but this is for the Agathario stans and I know y'all are a little traumatized so I'll hold off for now. Also also it makes Mrs. Davis's death even more tragic because there was actually no reason for her to be there, they already had their complete coven)
#sometimes you have to connect the dots yourself the source material isn't always going to spell it out for you in black and white#i'm begging y'all put down the pitchforks for a second and see this show for more than just the surface level romance#it's so good on so many different levels you're really missing out here i'm having a wonderful time#rio vidal#agatha harkness#agathario#agatha all along#billy maximoff
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