#honest bc theyre bad. but you can tell when im posting a lot that im in the TRENCHES. which is why ive been posting a billion times today

[volfoss]

i cant even like post about the horrors that are going on currently because im gonna get too mad but oh my god. like i would give her really good credit for writing a character like marius that has 0 self awareness about his insanely disgusting behavior bc like. that CAN work. you can make the reader feel disgust and see things through the eyes of someone who is horrible while not romanticizing the behavior. clearly anne did not get the memo for this one.

[lilastromama]

what i love about different zodiac signs/placements 🍷 [2]

___________________________

aries lilith: their willpower. it might not always be for the positive, but theyre willing to do everything in order to get what they want, everything. Theyre ruthless. Im not saying thats GOOD, but its not always a bad trait either. go babes

saturn in the 8th house: how the universe doesnt play about them. this has less to do w their personality, and more to do with how inclined they are with spirit. fool them once, youre not gonna be able to fool them twice anyways. The universe always whips out the uno reverse card on you if u make the mistake to hurt them. Just something i have experienced a hell lot

capricorn sun: their balance (?) listen idk how to put this in words the right way, but so many caps ive met have this certain balance. being calm, kind, patient. And then theyre loud, chaotic, angry, funny, make the best jokes and are the most noticeable in the room. U never know what u get, and i like that

aquarius moon: aquas have never been an easy ride for me, gotta be honest. but the one thing i hold them high up for, is how they dont always "fit in" and yet are still chillin. I have always found strength in being (excuse my language) "outcast" like. Its good to have a mind of your own, and not always walk the way others take, or tell u to go. Please keep questioning things, keep doing you. (as long as it doesnt harm anyone) its a great thing to be unique, its a power move. Its actually something we could all have/do a little more of.

virgo sun: their confidence/support level. Ive noticed a lot of virgo suns to be hype-women/men/people. they support u the best they can, give compliments not even models have ever heard, and make u feel like ure on top of the world. and in women (as i am one, and have experienced this ESPECIALLY with virgo women) they give the best instagram comments. U know which ones im talking about. Those "Omg, i hear vogue calling youu already!!" 🎈comments. Theyre the best at it.

cancer mars: its funny bc cancer is in its fall when its in mars, its not specifically a sought out placement to have. But there is something about those individuals that remind me of female rage. LISTEN 👹 it takes a lot for cancer mars people to noticeably lose their shit, they almost never do it in front of others, they keep quiet mostly. But WHEN they show their pent up emotions, its time to call 911. go home and get the gun, NOW.

9th house individuals: Their minds. Yes, yes, yes. If u like deeptalks, like to spiral down the rabbit hole and back up, talk to these people. they make amazing teachers, leaders, people which are there to guide and learn you. They have incredibly fast minds, they analyze and calculate QUICKLY. those are the people which u go to when ur ex posted a new pic and u wanna know whos in it. Give them about 3 seconds and they will find out, including where their great grandfather lives. A pleasure <3

[seraphtrevs]

hmmm ok wrt your color theory, i just watched bad choice road and i have some notes. but basically the tldr is that i dont think blue means truth, but instead loyalty

lalo is trying to figure out gus's loyalty more precisely, since he suspects gus is disingenuous about his intentions with the salamancas, thats why kims tirade about trust hits him. also "la familia es todo" & hector being the only one hes wholly honest to

kim is loyal to a fault. even when jimmys actions are very obviously destructive for himself and those around him, she just gets further into it -- marrying him instead of breaking up, leaving s&c (also a mirror of her leaving hhm to share a law office with jimmy, but that situation was a bit more complex)

this is more minor but if blue = truth, tuco would be blue as well as a character who is primarily associated with truth -- nacho calling his eyes his "lie detectors", figuring out that walter and jesse were lying to him in brba, etc. hes mainly associated with red because hes a failson <3 and to the salamancas thats equivalent to betrayal

thus red is disloyalty or betrayal, most obviously seen with nacho. his last monologue is not The Definitive Truth (peruvians lol), but it is a statement of unadulterated loyalty -- he created a (false) story that would protect his father from both gus and the salamancas while admitting that he'd been betraying everybody. hence the bluebells. in death, he has committed the ultimate act of loyalty and love using his own deceit

the issue im having with this reading is chuck. on one hand, you can say hes representative of loyalty to the law, and i wouldnt disagree. it does however bring in an alternative reading where blue = family which is one i can find evidence for if you like, but im already rambling so ill stop here, haha

love your posts !! theyre sooo interesting and ur so right always ^.^

Lots of good points! (Although Tuco is actually terrible at lie detecting - he never figures Nacho out, and his "lie detector" has a lot of false positives like when he killed Dog the biker. Walt and Jesse don't really factor into his color because Breaking Bad has a different color system than BCS.)

I think blue might be virtue in general - so truth, loyalty, justice, etc. Blue coded characters are at least striving for virtue, even if they don't always meet those ideals. I'll talk about Chuck and Howard later because they are both blue-coded (Howard is thee most blue character - like, he even has a blue named after him), but blue can also be hypocritical at times. To touch on loyalty, I'm planning on talking about how Howard lies to Jimmy that he was the one who wanted him gone, not Chuck. But he told that lie out of loyalty to Chuck. And Chuck cares a lot about exposing Jimmy's lies, but he does so through deceit.

I'm also going to get to Nacho's blue flower - definitely he's loyal to his father. But he's also able to speak his truth at last - telling the Salamancas and Gus exactly what he thinks of them, and his assessment of them is the real truth.

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Im about to watch RWBY Volume 9 because I need some background noise while I translate a german version of Jesus Christ Superstar and then I remembered that I watched that RWBY DC crossover a few days ago as background noise while I made my lyric videos and then I wanted to make a post about my thoughts but then I just. never did. So I might as well do it now

Before that though, I feel the need to explain myself and my lyric-video-translation process. Basically, what I do is I pick my song that Id like to translate from german to english and then I make what is essentially a normal lyric video, which involves a lot of me listening to the song a bunch of times so I can make sure everything is properly synched up, in this particular case I actually had to listen to the entirety of the song in order to make sure it was actually synched because something went horribly wrong with my editing app and I couldnt figure out how to fix it. And then once Im done with my lyric video I can just kinda turn the audio off and add my english translation without worrying about anything because Ive already synched everything up properly. When I do musical soundtracks like this I usually synch up all the lyrics for all the songs first before getting to the actual translation process, which means theres a long period of time where Im just kinda listening to the same part over and over, except worse and it took me even longer this time because again, something went wrong and I had to listen to the songs from the beginning, otherwise it just inexplicably wouldnt synch up, and because I have a low attention span Im usually watching youtube videos or movies Ive already seen at this point

Now, I was still in the lyric video stage when I watched this movie (I was doing Pilate and Christ if youre curious) so picture this: im sitting in front of my computer, I have this RWBY DC crossover open in some piracy site bc I was looking for A Movie and this one came out recently so it was on the front page, I have my tablet with the lyric video Im about to make in front of me, Im wearing headphones, one of them isnt actually on my ear because I need to be able to hear both the song and the movie at the same time, Im playing the song over and over again as I watch the movie, slowly zoning out entirely the further I get into it because thats just kinda what happens when youre forced to listen to the same first two minutes of a song even when you do have some background noise to break up the monotony a little

The reason Im giving you that long winded explanation of the boring shit I do for fun is because I want to stress to you that I was practically physically incapable of properly paying attention to anything. So you would think that I would also be incapable of finding shit to criticize or complain about, after all, I barely managed to watch the movie

And you would be very wrong. Im gonna be honest I just wrote that long intro to whatever this is in like 20 minutes and Ive already run out of steam so please enjoy this bullet point list of mostly shit I didnt like about this crossover, as someone who doesnt know anything about DC and also didnt pay a lot of attention just in general

The Justice Leagues semblances were so bad you can tell they just kinda took their existing superpowers, barely if at all modified them and went "yep, those are semblences alright" and as a result Superman, Wonderwoman and Green Lantern all basically have the same semblance, which inexplicably consists of multiple unrelated abilities and also Vixen's semblance seems pretty similar to theirs as well

The dialogue was so awkward man, I know some stan is gonna try and defend it by being like "well none of these people know each other ofc theyre gonna be awkward" guess what, i dont care if you can like stuff about this show for no reason I can dislike stuff about this show for no reason

That weird love triangle between Nora, Ren and Cyborg was so weird and unnecessary and idk why it was there

'Weird, unecessary and idk why it was there' is honestly a great way to describe this whole movie, I dont get why they did this Isekai thing with the Justice League I feel like this wouldve been better if they were already just characters in RWBY's world but I guess then neither continuity would be able to really consider it canon which would be bad I guess??? Idk i think this crossover thing was a bad idea tbh and they shouldve made it more of a cross-promotional thing where its like "lookat the RWBYfied versions of these DC characters!!" "oooooo look at the DCified versions of these RWBY characters!!" for one movie each if you know what I mean

Speaking of pointless romance, I saw some people say that they didnt like the weird romantic subplot between Bruce and Weiss but honestly, I didnt even see one there they had less romantic sparks flying between them than Bumbleby and thats saying a lot, not that I was paying too much attention

Ive seen some DC fans say that Bruce's thing about him maybe not wanting to leave Remnant because hes got powers there was really out of character and idk anything about that, I just know that that whole thing was pointless and barely set up and didnt mean anything at all for anyone

Ruby's arc about learning to be a better team leader is something that she shouldve had in like volume 4 max this is too late into the show for the Main Character whos been leading A Team since basically day one to learn how to do it, then again its not like shes gotten any meaningful screentime in the past 9 years so maybe that justifies it

Killgore or Killg%re or whatever was just cringe

When Killgore was explaining his plan and how he was working with someone and then it turned out that he was actually trapped in this VR world by that someone, I thought, oh its probably Salem given that shes yknow, the main villain. I mean, it doesnt really make sense why she would do all this shit but its not like her motivations and actions have ever been consistent right. And then he was like "he" and I went, its fucking Ironwood?? Are you joking?? Like, yeah, I'll give them a smidge of credit here, that does make more sense but I hate how these guys' weird desire to demonize Some Guy gets in the way of even attempting to make The Actual Main Villain even remotely threatening. Someone tell MKEK that sidelining a female character in favor of a male character isnt suddenly less sexist because shes Satan Herself but they wanna villanize the "shitty white guy" instead

The action scenes were decent enough, obviously nowhere near the level of Volume 1-3s fightscenes but Ive definitely seen worse from RWBY at this point

I guess the mystery aspect was fine too I was atleast kinda intrigued

And to end this whole thing on a somewhat positive note, heres some stuff I actually kinda liked:

While the isekai thing honestly doesnt seem like a good idea, it was still kinda fun watching people from a setting more similar to our world interact with Remnant and try to blend in even though they had no idea what was going on

I kinda liked Barry, he was pretty fun

I really liked Jessica, her finding that ring and saying that rhyming incantation actually gave me goosebumps, her VA was really good. I just wish she didnt spend all her screentime with Jaune and also I wish Jaune died already

I liked that they were wearing their Beacon Era outfits for most of it so I didnt have to endure their absolutely horrendous Atlas outfits although I am about to watch Volume 9 and they dont get an outfit change from what Ive seen so. You cant run from your problems forever I guess

Thats about it, but to bring this thing full circle Id like to once again elaborate on my lyric video translation stuff. Right now Im fully done with the lyric videos and all I gotta do is add in the english translations which I can do without needing to listen to the music, which means I can actually listen to the dialogue at the very least even if Im not properly looking at the screen. I was originally gonna do the same thing with Volume 9 as the crossover movie which is to say, blast music while watching and fully zoning out half the time but I figured the actual volume deserves a little more respect than that. I mean, thats still not a lot but RT isnt getting any more than this from me

[crymea-river]

4/26/2024

leap years are for remembering

god sometimes i read the things i used to write on here or even in my old journals and i cringe (for lack of a better word) at how seriously i was taking things. this page is such a time capsule. i love it, im glad ive documented my feelings over the years but it makes me feel… weird. nostalgia is so interesting.

im having a really good and also strange time with (what i assume is) my adult brain. good bc i can trust my judgement better than i have ever been able to; things just make sense in an innate way now, a way that i struggle describe. strange bc i feel like i know myself less than i ever have but also way more than i ever have at the same time ? im the same person i was at 11 and 12 and 13 and 17 and 18 and 22, and its so crazy to me how different all these ages felt but theyre all me. they didnt really go anywhere, theyre all still inside me. i remember being 22 and still feeling relatively connected to my high-school-self but then just 2 years later i felt decades removed from her. and now i feel decades removed from my 22-year-old-self. the way i would reminisce on 2016 in 2020 is how im reminiscing on 2020 now. lol leap years are for remembering, i guess.

ive found myself reverting back to a lot of things i used to do and enjoy in adolescence. lots of silly topical things, like using pantene instead of all these expensive hair products ive tried over the years. i loved the way it made my hair smell back then and it made it so soft and who cares if it coats my hair in silicon or whatever ill just clarify it every few weeks itll be fine. im also finally letting myself enjoy things from back then that i was afraid to fully embrace for fear of being judged. thats a Huge fun part about getting older i’ve noticed, not caring what others think. id have told you back then that i didnt care about that, and on the surface i didnt. but it would get to me to some degree. i think my music taste from back then is a prime example of that (im not gonna elaborate i know what i mean).

i hope im making 11 and 12 and 13 year old me proud. and i want to tell 16 and 17 and 18 AND 19 year old me it gets better, but also to stop taking such trivial things so seriously maybe. life does not revolve around having a boyfriend (or whatever youd call those fuckers from back then). itll happen when its meant to and it will be so worth it. no one knows what they want at those ages. i barely knew what i wanted until it fell into my lap to be honest, and that only happened after i stopped yearning so hard for that shit and began TRULY enjoying my own company (and my friends’ obviously. love them). this is not where i wanted to go with this, i didnt want to talk about men. i think thats what cringes me out so bad about my old posts/entries, theyre allllllll (mostly) about bOyS. which was age appropriate i GUESS but idk it just brought me so much unnecessary stress lol. i learned eventually, and im glad i did so when i did.

all this to say im very happy. and peaceful. and i love the people i have surrounded myself with. i love being in love and i cannot describe in actual english words how thrilled i am that its with will. even 4 years into it.

being 26 is just so strange i think

[spnshameblog]

I'm interested to know what you stance on Misha is after all this. peope seem to be pretty divided about this. has your opinion of him changed?

ok, i think this is gonna be a bit wordy. ive been in this fandom on and off for about a decade. if you follow a show and its actors for that many years, you are going to see them act in ways you cant support. everyones boundaries are different and ive withdrawn my support for people over things that other might find laughable, so i would never say that he hasnt done anything so bad that people should "unstan" him. personally, i dont think he has done something so bad that i cant ever support him again. over the decade he has said and posted some really dumb and sometimes offensive shit and i cant give you an itemised list of all happenings, but iirc he almost always apologised and i dont remember him making the same mistake twice. so if he says he apologises and is learning, i want to believe him, i just have no idea what thats going to look like.

see, a lot of us arent upset about a "misfired joke", if anyone else had done that people would be like "haha embarassing, lets move on", but a lot of people genuinely assumed him to be queer even before he made that comment, which is proven by the thousands of comments going like "i thought he had been out this entire time". a huge amount of people drew the conclusion, based on his actions and his words, that he wasnt straight, even though he personally never said so. so the thing most people are upset about is that theyre now having to recontextualise years (in my case a decade) of stuff we consciously or subconsciously interpreted as evidence. YES you shouldnt assume someones identity, but its not like he dissuaded people from speculating. quite the opposite and that is another reason why people are upset.

they feel like misha has been deceiving them, using his ambiguity for attention and support from lgbt people and theyre not entirely wrong. a lot of stuff can, in hindsight, be explained by him noticing that his fans seem to really respond to him acting a certain why, so why not act that up a little. what i take issue with is the claim that most of his personality and his support for queer causes were to garner support from queer people. i dont know the guy and i cant make any definitive statements, but i believe he is really mostly like that lmao. he has talked about how people are surprised by how, for a lack of a better word, 'unmasculine' or emotionally open he is. if he was just 'acting up the gay' around fans, then why have his colleagues and friends also commented on this? and he definitely has had to experience homophobic microaggressions esp on the set of spn, which doesnt make sense if hes like, a normal macho dude when fans arent watching. again, yes, i totally believe he purposefully exaggerated some of it bc fans eat that shit up and if nothing else hes a people pleaser. and also sometimes straight guys just act a little gay, idk what to tell you.

so now theres the theory that it actually WAS an honest comment, but for some reason he decided he needed to go back into the closet. now, if someone states their own orientation THIS explicitly im bound to accept that, however i can see where this theory is coming from, given that there are some instances that simply cant be explained as jokes or him acting up the gay etc. at least from our perspective. so idk buddy, he might be, he might not be. however i dont agree with the sentiment that him going back in the closet is funny. like ive seen posts like "funniest outome would be him actually coming out in 5 years and nobody believes him" idc if im a little softie, but that idea isnt funny to me at all. IF he ever comes out, im fully prepared to believe him immediately, even if it makes me look like a clown again.

so i can empathise with people having all kinds of reactions to this from trying to make sense of it, to distancing themselves, from trying to forget about it, to dragging him for filth, imho all valid reactions. i dont agree with people saying that this situation is the fault of the fans, ive said multiple times that this specific situation and the fact that people were so ready to believe he's bi were misha's own doing. and i dont agree with people saying he is a master manipulator who has been tricking lgbt people out of their money for years by being a 24/7 gay for pay.

so tl;dr: idk lol? im waiting to see how his behaviour changes after these events, but aside from being really confused i cant say my opinion of him has changed that much?

[tigerdrop]

dogboy gordon rutting against benreys leg in the same way that benrey did it in the reverse. benrey encouraging him and also making fun of him in the same breath. yummy brain thoughts. i am rotating this

jesus christ i started thinking about dogboy gordon and have not stopped thinking. theres 7k words of dogboy stuff under here im going insane

how in the. help. Help. dog boy. how does he become dogboy. i cant keep giving these idiots potions but i guess thats what ive been reduced to

gman turns him into a dog boy. walks thru a portal and comes out in nintendogs but hes the dog and when he comes back out again hes still a little bit dogy. this is fucking stupid

THE TAIL WAGGING im going to pass away

> i think he would have such fucking issues with the fact that his tail and ears are expressing his emotions so much

trying to act angry towards benrey but hes given away by his tail wagging like crazy......and he never even knows its happening until somebody points it out

it would be cool if. um. he got a little more into roughhousing and rough play afterward. you know. like a . hes already really handsy......physical. . .. .

> okay like the anger turning into somewhat-serious jostling and pushing which turns into roughhousing

its not even horny at first it just gives him the weirdest fucking endorphins. like. its fucking fun man

> and by the time theyre roughhousing his tail is wagging furiously and like thumping on the floor when he gets pinned haha

> YES its about the exhilaration ......he gets this rush from flipping benrey over after he's pinning him, baring his teeth triumphantly

benrey pinning him by his wrists and half-laughing at him like "what the fuck is wrong with you??" and the rest of the science team chimes in like YEAH WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS WHAT WAS THAT

> gordon comes back to himself and turns red immediately and splutters like "i dont know! what - im just - benrey started it!” so like he refuses to do it again but then benrey pushes his buttons and he gets in his face, ears pinned back a bit and shoves him and benreys like oh...so its this again huh...

GOD......PUSHING HIS BUTTONS.......its sooo much fun now that gordons so physically reactive too

> what if he manages to get an honest to god growl out of gordon at one point and it makes something ugly twist in benrey's gut and he wants to make it happen again

and its probably really gratifying for him to see just how often gordons tail wags when gordon looks at him or snorts at one of his jokes

TWO SIDES

> the duality of their relationship....gordons tail wagging just a bit when hes looking at benrey though im

> im thinking about the growling though like...benrey gets fixated on how he fucking sounds, all deep and rumbly and this intensity just focused on benrey only....makes him think about how that would look in other contexts....

> benrey riling him up while their roughousing so he can feel that growl travel through his chest and like...getting gordon to that point makes him SO determined to win the "fight" over benrey hes almost a bit out of his mind with it......pins benrey and subconsciously ruts against him a bit as a sign of dominance....please stop me now goodbye....

NO LITERALLY THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING ABOUT THE MOMENT I STARTED TYPING

prodding gordon further and further and riling him up until gordon pins him to the floor, hard, an arm jammed behind his back and his HEV suit jammed up against benreys ass and rutting subconsciously as gordon. h. gordon. clamps down on the back of his neck and growls

benrey sucks in a rattling gasp and is like "what? ow" in a weirdly shocked yet distanced way

he cant feel where gordons hard b/c of the HEV suit but he can feel the metal awkwardly bumping against his ass Like That. and inwardly benreys on a loop of "what the fuck what the fuck" but not in a bad way in the slightest. just utterly cannot believe this is whats happening, right now, gordon freeman dry humping his ass behind a bunch of crates, not 100 feet from the rest of the science team

> gordon snapping out of it and being like...what the fuck am i doing... or....maybe the gasp makes gordon bite down harder in response...not sure

> gordon not even realizing hes doing it until that moment is so great....i dont know but....maybe he lets go and pushes off benrey, panting and wild eyed, and the image of benrey on his stomach, his bite mark in his neck, is burned into his brain

> he just doesnt say fucking anything and just dips to get jacked off by the suit maybe.... cant stop thinking about how it felt to see benrey with his teeth marks....hates himself for feeling that sick satisfaction in his chest

benrey......touching the back of his neck afterwrds, kind of dream-like, both consciously and subconsciously.......

i like making gordon freeman suffer so i want him to just angrily try to rut against his arm in private later trying desperately to get off thru this stupid busted HEV suit that he cant get out of. pathetic. gordon freeman humping his own fucking arm in a bathroom stall. like a dog

and he thinks about how benrey smelled when he had his teeth clamped on the back of benreys neck, his nose buried right against benreys jaw and neck, smelling the sweat and the hormones and feeling benreys rapid heartbeat, and his whole fucking head throbs with how bad he wants to get off

> and he just cant get off....has to deal with going back the team tense and a bit sweaty and just move on when they ask what happened. benrey doesnt say anything just stares at him and gordon cant meet his eyes. gordon tries not to fucking let benrey get under his skin cause i think hes probably mad upset and embarassed that he reverted to his like,,,more base instincts because of BENREY of all people.....

> but he still thinks about it sometimes and....he tries to distance himself from him but hes still a pretty touchy guy and he find himself around benrey still....laughing at his jokes and getting in his space once in a while. always pulls himself away when he notices but not before he takes in a deep breath of benrey's scent...

> meanwhile benreys trying to think of how to make gordon do that shit again LOL

ohmy god. oh my god.....before this.....before he tries to stop getting in benreys business and before he even recognizes what hes doing.......he like.....hes so touchy feely that he subconsciously tries to mark benrey a lot. like just doing everything in his power to rub the inside of his wrists somewhere on him. even if its barely gonna do anything b/c of the suit. its just instinct

> NOW HE ...now he realizes that he was doing that the whole time..jesus,...

> AUGH....in the buildup before this he didnt realize that he was doing it........but now he realizes he fucking misses doing that shit and kind of berates himself for doing it in the first place....like what the fuck....be Normal gordon...you cant want to fuck him....do you..?

i want him to. grrgohg i dont even know how or why this would happen but i want gordon freeman to lie supine on the ground with his hands up like paws like hes a big pupy looking for tummy rubs OKAY! BYE. I HAVE TO GO. im going to fucking sob why am i like this why is this the cutest possible thing for a man to do. i cant even think of a fucking reason why he would do this so im so fucking embarrassed

i want to fucking. i want to rub his fucking tumy and make him pop a boner from it im literally so sick of this earth

> i was literally Just typing: i just think it would be cool . To pet his tummy and keep telling him "good boy" in a Certain kind of Tone that just totally fucks him up about it . maybe flushed and tongue starting to wanna hang out of his mouth as he goes from laying flat on his back to kinda twisted to one side, breathing heavy, tail thumping hard against the floor cause hes a big dog so that thing is like a lethal weapon

> petting the fuzzy lower belly while hes already hard & needy just to make him whine Very high pitched and desperate-sounding bc its so close to what he wants but that just makes it worse 8)

> What if. Benrey pinning Gordon, maybe scritches behind his ear, as a "joke", he's a dog haha good boy wants ear scritches?? And Gordon immediately squirming and whining. Maybe even kicking his leg just a little bit

> i think it would be cool for a post-black mesa puby gordon pinned benrey to the floor with his whole body weight and humped the life out of benrey's leg while panting and drooling in benrey's ear. a total lack of regard for benrey, (of course he's into it tho) just using him like an object that's conveniently there for him to furiously get off on

> i'm thinking.... this happening after a period of prolonged teasing, like you said. rubbing his tummy and ignoring his dick

> Man ok combined with the suit edging huh? I love that, but i also kinda want gordon to sneak off to get off and discover his uh. k. kn. knot

> he sneaks off and if in this situation he can.  idk. get at his dick in a bathroom or whatever. and well, he gets caught up so easily in his 'head empty' instincts mode that when he cums he's kneading that thang for like 2 minutes before he even becomes cognizant enough to notice. and then immediately panic. so idk maybe he cant get at himself for a while, right, so he didnt notice this

> i just think gordon being in the suit would not let him get at his dick and he would only be able to get off in really convoluted ways so like...he wouldnt fucking Know he had a knot he would just feel a weird pressure at the base that he doesnt know what its about. but he starts getting these fantasies of holding benrey down and staying in him when he comes and he doesnt know where the hell thats coming from.....yet. until after everything is over and he can get out of it, and the first time he jacks off again he realizes HOLY FUCK? like what the hell....but it makes sense in retrospect where those fantasies came from. but hes just super embarassed about those fantasies and pushes them down until benrey comes back into his life and activates him again

> in addition to embarassment i think he has a lot of complicated feelings about benrey and definitely feels a guilty about wanting to fuck him into the ground and fill him with cum....but GOD if benrey doesnt get to him just as much as he did in black mesa

> i think that something like this would be so unplanned and shit but like......theyve probably hung out a few times before this or more like maybe benrey has dropped into his house just to annoy him and gordon finds his ears pricking when he hears heavy footsteps around his house cause he recognizes them as benrey's...

> little rush of exhilaration maybe. cause it means they'll spend some time together and he has just all these emotions under his skin when they do. i dont know how this would happen but maybe gordon forgets to keep himself in check when benrey makes him laugh so hard he's snorting and his tail is wagging furiously.benrey tries to touch/catch his tail cause he's kinda curious about it and it never got to mess with it in black mesa. but it turns into roughhousing as gordon shoves him away a little bit but benrey keeps trying to get at it and then get at his ears

> "cmon man just let me touch them whats the big deal-" "NO!" but like hes still laughing a bit until they start really getting into it and he gets breathless and a little irritated at having to roll around and try to pin benrey's hands to the floor

hell on earth......the way his tails wagging and hes grinning and drooling a little once he gets benrey pinned.......

> little triumphant smile when he finally does.....got benrey on his stomach and he's subconsciously rutting against benrey's ass like in black mesa but hes just not noticing while he's berating benrey for losing

> talking right into his ear, and benrey lets out a little gasp when he does a particularly hard thrust and then hes like oh. fuck. he takes in a deep breath and can smell benrey's sweat and realizes hes just as horny about this as he is. cant help but bury his face in the back of his neck and lick. and benrey starts pushing back into him and talking the worst dirty talk and it makes him growl right against his neck and put his teeth there again as a warning not to move but benrey doesnt still, he just keeps talking. so gordon bites down, hard, cutting him off mid sentence with a yelp

f. fucking. benrey......arching his back into it.......pressing his hips up as high as theyll go......the angles bro.....the angles

> also: gordon popping boners more easily, even when he's just platonically excited w/ benrey..... yeah... :)

> like the thing about this is just that he got so excited from the wrasslin that he popped a boner....wasnt even thinking of horny.....

> not until benrey started gasping and arching back into him. then hes immediately aware of how this looks...like hes already basically in the position in his fantasies hes just rutting against him in the imitation of fucking

> gordon getting more frenzied by the little sounds benrey is making as he clamps down on his neck, drool dripping down his chin. benrey braces himself with one hand and gets the other to pull his pants down and then tug on the leg of gordon's down a bit because gordon is kind of. not thinking straight right now. gordon gets the message and fumbles with the buttons to get it down and like. haha i thinnk it would be fun if benrey prepped himself before this and gordon notices like. you really managed to prep urself this time? god, you really wanted this to happen. but maybe benrey had been doing it the last few times cause gordon would get in his space again sometimes and things were tense

NO GOD THIS IS GOOD. LIKE. oh my god gordon just like bitching at him and getting up in his face and Growling a couple times before while his pants are all tented from the inadvertent excitement boners that he doesnt even realize hes having.....and benrey might not be smart but hes not stupid

theres like a 50% chance theyre gonna fuck at any given time he realizes so like. why not......

even if it doesnt work out in the moment benrey still spends the whole time hopped up on the knowledge that they could have, that he was the little fucking pervert who got himself all prepped just in case gordon decided todays the day hes just gonna mount him, and honestly the way he beats his meat and fucks himself afterwards might be nearly as good as the real deal, just from that little bit of self-inflicted degradation

like u said...........he really wanted it to happen

> hhh.... maybe gordon ruts a bit against his ass and benrey guides him in and. he makes a deep growling rumble when he bottoms out. benrey feels it through his chest and gets a full body shiver as he's filled. i dont think hes fully developed his knot yet but its a tight fit. he starts fucking hard and fast into him while open mouthed panting, he cant keep his face away from the benrey's neck, licking up the sweat and burying his face there to breathe in his scent

the fucking . the desperation......every instinct in his body has been telling him to fuck benrey - yes, that benrey, fucking benrey - into the ground for......weeks now? months??

dudes probably tried everything he can think of to overcome it and to think about literally anything else when he gets off but nobody he fucks even comes close to smelling as good as benrey did when gordon had him pinned and gasping and sweating and he could smell the want rolling off him in waves.....and it sucks massive dick and he hates it

> hes been driven crazy by this thought for so long.....cant fucking control himself. wh. what if gordon managed to get a hold of a piece of benrey's clothes that he left and held it up to his face when he let himself jack off to this particular thought so he could get the scent but it jsut wasnt the same without his warm, panting body below him . he always nuts the hardest when he has it though

huffing benreys undershirt and desperately rutting into a pillow on his hands and knees with his ass fully up and hes just utterly debased right now

sad and pathetic gordon freeman humping his pillow like a dog and whining thinking about fucking benrey. if his past self could see himself like this right now he would be disgusted

> !!!!!!!!1 HIM GETTING INTO THE MOUNTING POSITION ON INSTINCT WHEN HE DOES IT...YOUR BRAIN ! i think that gordon would definitely give everything hes got to benrey when he finally gets to fuck him.

> now that hes actually doing it he's just out of his goddamn mind. benrey already being ready for him, slick and hot, just letting him push in .....i think he would definitely go insane

dudes never fucked so hard or so mindlessly in his life......for once all the neuroses just fly out the window. overcome by instinct

> letting out all these whines and moans, not even caring for how loud hes being... benrey's wanted this so fucking bad hes just eating it up, pushing back on him like an animal and getting a power trip that he made gordon this unhinged

thinking about him just being utterly shocked when benrey guides him in and he can just bury himself all the way to the hilt so easily and it makes something in his brain snap

> gordon doesnt even tell benrey when hes close, benrey can just start to feel his knot swell inside him and how it stretches him a bit past what he prepared for...but he wants it in him so fucking bad, he just lets gordon keep fucking into him

like. oh my god. does benrey even know about the knot or is this a brand new and fun surprise for him

> I DONT KNOW......I JUST REALLY LIKE THE THOUGHT OF HIM BEING A BIT CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY IT....

> being caught off guard by it but being so turned on by the feeling of it filling him that he lets out this really high, needy sound. which goes straight to gordon's dick and he just pushes into him harder and jolts his whole body with it. maybe he h....he bites down on the other side of his neck again and thrusts in one more time before coming deep in him. just shuddering from it, eyes squeezed shut and jaw locked around benrey

benrey just fuckin. face down ass up and arching his back as high as he can

(mumbling very quietly) it might be cool also if. gordon maybe.....started growling some things as he got close. a certain something. a word

you know......just......bent over benreys back......arms wrapped around benreys chest and fingers digging into the soft flesh (maybe even his titties, if youre feeling spicy).......pistoning his hips in staccato bursts while he growls.........u bh hhhhh......"mine". over and over not even realizing hes doing it b/c his brain is so fogged out on the sheer delight of rawing benrey after having thought about it non-stop

(mumbling so quietly im speaking at a pitch below the human hearing threshold) benrey hoarsely saying "'m yours, 'm yours" while hes got one hand jammed underneath himself to tug at his dick is the thing that sets gordon off and makes him come, perhaps. perhaps

and gordon just.....slumps over him, leaning his full body weight on him, panting weakly into his ear while his hips subconsciously rut just a little bit, arms still wrapped around benrey but otherwise as useless as a bump on a log while benreys jerking himself off to the wild new feeling of having that knot stretch him open and tug at him every time gordon shifts his hips

gordon nuts and becomes utterly useless but at least his knots still fat as hell so benreys still got something to work with

(sobbing) i just want to see men acting like animals leave me olone..... its about the submission to instinct......the degradation and dehumanization......and also the scent kink its all about the fucking scent kink. its about wanting to huff a guy you pretend you hate like hes a fucking magic marker and its about wanting to make him smell like u

> for scent kink, Gordon's boners due to sweaty benrey hehehehe. this is narsty -> Benrey is like "yeesh that was a lot of exertion" after their first almost-sex wrasslin match, and gets embarassed, so next time he like, wears a bunch of old spice.... but gordon doesn't get as excited. like yeah he can feel him against his back and yeah he's not soft but.. he's not panting or as hard. benrey thinks real hard when he gets home

> CLEAN SWEAT OK ITS A COMBATIBILITY THING OK. IT IS. LOOK UP THE SCIENCE OK I ...walks away. clown shoez

YOU ARE SO FUCKING CORRECT THANK U

> Maybe next time He doesn't bother with the old spice at all, and he gets real into the wrasslin... hell maybe he even uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gets gordon's head under his arm im just saying

I DIDNT WANNA BE THE ONE TO SAY IT BUT NO YEAH THATS COOL. ITS A VERY COOL THOUGHT

think about......dogboy gordon roughhousing and getting pinned down himself and snapping his teeth up at benrey like joking but not joking. you know

they both start just getting really into roughhousing b/c sometimes gordons brain gets Stressed The Fuck Out by all the added stimulation to the senses of being pupy......theres too many sounds and smells sometimes and it makes him even more neurotic and makes him start acting up and getting irritable and trying to start shit until he exerts himself enough to tire his brain out and make it shut up

maybe even like.....in the interim after black mesa but before he runs into benrey again, gordon becomes a fucking hot mess b/c he doesnt know how to deal with it all and the only way he got thru black mesa without his brainstem snapping in half was b/c he and benrey would start shit and start fighting and wrestling and the rest of the science team eventually shrugged and accepted this as a (very weird) part of their life now. he looks like hes one minor inconvenience away from a panic attack and its so sad

any kind of physical exercise would help (he takes up jogging when hes feeling stressed out, which is a lot, and hes gotten some really nice legs by this point) but theres just something different about the roughhousing. its a mental exercise as well as a physical one, so it exhausts his brain more, and unbeknownst to him, he just gets fucking endorphins from the way benrey smells and from being able to mark him with all the up-close physical contact theyre getting. so. hence the wrestling and roughhousing and gordons occasional tendency to just pounce the guy in public and start fighting him with his tail wagging and thumping like crazy

it might be even better if gordon attempts to roughhouse with just about the whole science crew at some point, just for a point of comparison

like.....its usually good, its satisfying, and it wears him out and lets him function like a human being......but theres just something about roughhousing with benrey thats really satisfying and he doesnt have the emotional intelligence to figure out what it is

gordon freeman is an idiot, is what im saying

> tommy indulges him and probably lets him win a few times, coomer soundly wins out every time and bubby probably...loses some before getting pissy LOL. i think that its fun for him to get the most Good Feelings out of roughhousing with benrey.....

AUUUUGHHH WHAT IF HE LICKED BENREYS FACE THO

g gbfbhhh god im obsessed with the way benrey laughs at him and asks "what the fuck is wrong  with you?" in the act 3 commentary and thats the exact kind of vibe im feeling from him about like. everything gordon does in pupymode

> Okay, before I go to bed, I shall leave you with a Dog Thought™. Gordon probably wouldn’t be the “best trained” dog in the world because, well, he doesn’t have anyone to make him listen or obey. Heck, given his need to be in control, he probably thinks he’s the leader of the proverbial pack and nobody can tell him what to do. He’d probably slip and do quite a few “rude” and obnoxious dog things, including but not limited to being all over Benrey.

> Trying to goad him into roughhousing. Licking his face. Being in his space to the point that it even starts to make Benrey raise an eyebrow. Inappropriate marking and whatnot. [cough] And what if Benrey--in a weird reversal of the roles we usually give--is stuck with the task of… training Gordon… to behave…

> YOU KNOOOOW. Because pitting alpha dog Gordon against Benrey, who is trying to get him to be “good”...

> … Well, that could be interesting.

> Imagine if you will: Benrey realizing he needs to get Gordon under control. As much as he likes the attention, it's becoming too much. Relentless. Tables have been turned and now he's the one that's a little overwhelmed by the situation because, well, Gordon is running on pure instinct half the time. Making it hard to do things. Making it hard to live his life. Always in his bubble which was, like, fine at first but now he can't do anything without feeling a wet tongue on his face or having Gordon trying to goad him into rough housing.

> He needs so much attention. Has so much energy. It's too much.

> So, he decides he's going to try to "train" Gordon to not... do that. Benrey trying to assert dominance over Gordon, as if he were just a normal dog. Gordon, who has already marked Benrey and decided that Benrey belongs to him does not take to this very well. This is not how the chain of command works. This isn't how the chain of command works at all.

> Benrey, struggling to curb him through praise and admonitions--"good boy," "bad boy," tossing him ~treats~ if he does something right--is now facing off with Gordon, who is both enamored with the attention he's getting but utterly pissed off by the fact Benrey is trying to stop him from doing what he wants.

losing it at the tables being turned and now gordons the annoying fucker getting up in benreys business all the time and never leaving him alone. he deserves this

> They're basically both unmovable objects and unstoppable forces. Benrey is stubborn and isn't going to give up all his sweet PS3 time because Gordon won't stop humping his leg, and Gordon is not going to give up his God given right to make Benrey his property. But Benrey isn't completely averse to the idea of being Gordon's bitch. He just wants to be his bitch on his own terms.

> So, in a surprising show of... well, intelligence on Benrey's behalf, he starts redirecting Gordon's energy towards what HE wants Gordon to do.

> That's how you handle misbehaving dogs anyway. You redirect their energy. That's what all the books on dog training says anyway, and Benrey's inclined to believe it because he's read it in all two books on the subject he casually flipped through.

> So, when Gordon starts getting in his space, he starts redirecting him to touch where he wants touched. "Good boy." When Gordon starts getting a little rough, he purposefully positions himself so he gets the most out of it. "Good boy." When Gordon's licking his face, he starts trying to guide that tongue down to his neck. Feels better there. "Good boy."

> Because he's not a complete idiot. Him and Gordon both know this is sexually charged at this point. And Gordon... Gordon can bend his behaviors a little bit as he's being directed if he still gets to do what he wants (in a way), and Benrey still gets to be fondled by the nerd.

> "But part of the problem is that he is in Benrey's space all the time!" Yeah, but Benrey figured that out, too. You know what shuts up Gordon real fast? Pushing him back down on the other end of the couch and telling him to stay. And if he listens, he slowly, carefully hand feeds Gordon a treat as a reward. Pushing it into his mouth, making sure it goes all the way in. Letting Gordon lick the last bits of taste off of his fingers. He usually sits still after that. "Good boy."

i have a thought thats almost unrelated but im so desperate to give this scenario the proper context

thinking about......gordon getting out of black mesa and hes still dogboy.....and hes attempting to go back to life as normal now that benreys out of his hair for ever but one day his pupy nose catches That Fucking Smell on the air and he realizes that benreys not fucking dead. he thought benrey was fucking dead, b/c he killed him

gordon freeman losing his mind for a solid week or two trying to hunt that smell down (why?? to prove a point?? to try to kill benrey again??? uh huh.) and then when he does hunt benrey down, its like.....well, what was the plan, bud? you found him, and now youre having a staredown outside a 7/11 while benreys frozen halfway through his big gulp

i literally forgot what i was typing b/c dogy gordon tum y rub b gtfhgbb ggfabgbbg

and.....well......he doesnt know exactly what his game plan was, but he does know that benrey cant be trusted as far as u can throw him, and hes not about to let benrey wreak havoc on new mexico if he can help it, so now his new hobby is......tracking benrey across the city to keep an eye on him

and thats how they keep ending up in close proximity

and thats how u start looping in the whole role reversal thing.....suddenly gordons the one that benrey cant shake......hes a bloodhound and hes got the scent

SORRY im SORRY i crave context with the same ferocity that i crave, like, air

and then they start roughhousing when gordon tackles him to the ground one day to stop him from doing.....something......and gordon snaps being to being a normal person so quickly afterwards that its dizzying. turns out a solid 80% of what he really wanted was a sparring buddy

> good afternoon everyone this is not horny in the slightest but i just wanted to say- you know that thing dogs do where they get REALLY excited and playful when you come home from a long day at work? well i’m just thinking about. y’know how benrey has a tendency to just, vanish for a while and come back like nothing happened? think it’d be cute if he were gone for a particularly long stretch of time b4 catching up with the science team again and gordon RESPONDS in his typical annoyed, bratty fashion while his body language is saying something completely different (he still hasn’t mastered the art of puby)

> like, u know, tail wagging a hundred miles a minute, ears perked up and attentive, subconsciously getting all up in benrey’s space

Im going to Cry thats so fucking cute wtf wtf  wt ff

still going insane thinking about the “good boy” thing......like...... its all fun and games until hes grappling his best friend benrey and hes got benrey in a headlock and hes plastered against benreys back from head to toe and his tails thumping excitedly against the floor and hes panting hot and harsh right against benreys ear and benrey takes that moment, right there, to choke out "good boy"

its half outright horny and half power play b/c benreys banking that either theyre gonna fuck or gordons gonna let go and be like "what the fuck, man" and then benrey can get the drop on him again

the way gordon just goes stiff after he says it.....breath getting shaky.....dick twitching once against benreys ass and the guy can fucking feel it clear as day......Augh

his tail slows.....and then fires right back up again when he tentatively rocks his hips against benreys ass and feels the sound benrey makes more than he hears it......and like for fucks sake theyve been dancing around how horny their roughhousing sessions are for weeks, this guy deserves to finally get his rocks off by dry humping benreys ass while benreys getting spots in his vision from how tightly gordons got his arm wrapped around his neck. he deserves this

gordons free hand slowly opening up and pressing flat against benreys shirt, then crawling under it so that he can feel the bare skin of his stomach......rocking his hips against the dip between benreys cheeks and whimpering when benrey says it again, breathless and hoarse. "good boy." his tongue poking out to lick a broad, wet stripe up the side of benreys neck to taste the salt and sweat and the hormones, jesus christ, hes never been able to taste if somebodys horny before but its rolling off of him in waves.......and gordons breath comes out so loud and harsh and desperate when benreys leg lifts up a little bit for him to slot his own between them more easily

just mumbling stupid horny shit like "fuck benrey, you taste so good" while his tongue lolls out of his mouth and he licks the curve of benreys ear and rolls benrey onto his stomach b/c something in the back of his brain is whispering to him that it would be a really, really good idea, and hes originally got benrey just crushed flat against the floor with his full body weight but benrey takes a rattling breath and tells him to ease up, get up offa him.....

and gordons confused at this point b/c he was pretty sure this was where this was going, he was being a good boy, but that thought doesnt last very long b/c benreys shuffling into position under him, raising his hips and pushing gordons up with him while his face and torso are flat against the floor, and, Oh. hes. hes doing that. this is what theyre fucking doing now

> gordon taking the collar of benrey’s shirt in his mouth in an crude imitation of scruffing him

every fucking bone in gordons body is telling him to move his hips, fuck benrey stupid, bury himself to the hilt, but he cant do that when theyre both still clothed so he does the next best thing and ruts against benrey like he fucking means it and like if he just tries hard enough, gets enough friction, itll be just like fucking him for real......

hes so dizzied by looping thoughts of he wants this, he wants you to mount him, like youre a filthy fucking animal, arent you? you sick fuck, you wanna mark him and breed him and hed let you, hed beg you for it, look, hes doing it right now and when he comes back down to earth, yeah, benrey is begging right now, isnt he. while hes palming at the front of his sweatpants and whimpering and calling gordon a good boy, attempting to tug his pants down to his knees so gordon can rut against bare flesh, and gordon slows down just enough to let him do it and to fumble open his own zipper to ease some of the agonizing pressure

gordon fumbling his dick out of his underwear to line it up between benreys fat cheeks and god, the feeling of skin against skin is so much fucking better than chafing against his jeans that it makes him growl against benreys neck and benrey cant pump his fucking dick fast enough. hes so encouraging, what with all those little sounds hes making and the way hes arching his back and pressing his hips up as high as theyll go, groaning into the crook of his arm "fuckin, fuck me, bro, j-just like that"

> thinking...... they both get so lost in it, they both can’t hold back long enough to fuck for real. this is too hot, benrey feels something hot and wet on his ass and gordon is curling into him. benrey’s never felt so simultaneous turned on and frustrated that he’s still empty, he’s still gonna have to wait, snd ironically that denial pushes him over too

GOD yes fuckin. coming on his ass b/c gordons so frantic and desperate that he cant wait...... but seeing his cum all over benreys ass is deeply satisfying in its own way. he smears it deep into benreys skin to mark him like that

> oh hey imma be nasty sorry but Gordon all cum-high just sort of manouvering Benrey until he can start licking his cock clean bc he likes to uh. i mean benrey's all wet and you know. he likes it. and benrey comes from that, before he can even think about sucking him off properly

> he doesnt have a thought left in his head at the moment... and can u blame him? so he just uh follows he nose.......  and benrey's brain is deleted except for "GORDON FREEMAN ON MY DICK????????" bouncing around like a screensaver yes

> yeah he's not even trying to suck him off really, hes not gotten that far yet cuz hes so cumbrained, gone stupid, etc

im gonna be gross here too okay......and like. fucking. huffing and burying his nose into the crook of benreys thighs b/c he smells so intensely like sex and sweat and it makes gordon lightheaded

> YEAAH maybe he starts licking there before he gets up to his dick. it's not like he's dragging it out really so it's not long but benrey's gaping like a fish. he's trying to say something sorta but he can't get any words out and isn't even sure what he himself is trying to say

maybe he cant help himself and he just starts licking and biting on impulse b/c its your resident fuckin thigh guy here and i think benrey deserves to get em chomped like a drumstick

> and then that's gordon's tongue on his dick, bro and this neurotic mf looking so pleased and blissed out as he sloppily licks him all over is a sight he couldn't have even cooked up in his imagination before now

> benrey not coherently enough to warn him he’s like right there, his babbling incoherently at the tease of gordon’s nose and lips is gonna make him- and then his Tounge darts out and it’s over, the start of the end and he’s spurting all over gordon’s completely surprised face without even being jerked or licked through it

> maybe since gordon's been so stressed and keyed up for so long that benrey coming is a surprise but still doesn't shock him enough to clear the cumbrain, so he licks ben clean after that too, while he's twitching and whimpering etc

> think that benrey massive meat being useless and barely even touched is hip and rad even in the context of him technically being in the higher position of power

> then rests his head on beny's belly for a while, feeling very accomplished and tired. he'll panic later, don't worry

god im still thinking about. pillow humping/voyeurism

gordon freemans a bad fucking dog and sometimes he cant help himself and just starts rutting into a pillow with his ass up and his face buried in one of benreys undershirts while hes just panting and mumbling shit the whole time about benrey, benrey, benrey, why is he so fucking obsessed with benrey and with thinking about mounting him just like hes doing to his poor abused pillow every week

and. you know. maybe one day......benrey kind of.....catches him in the act. i think that would be cool. just coming home one day and cracking open his bedroom door and seeing gordon freeman on all fours, his teeth sunk deep into one pillow and another pillow between his thighs, desperately fucking it while hes groaning benreys name b/c he sure as shit was not expecting him back that early, which is why his cumbrain made him feel confident enough to crawl into benreys bed and roll around in it and mainline benreys scent from his clothes and nut on his pillow (and then feel fucking bad about it and frantically try to clean it off)

and benrey just slooowly steps back with his heart pounding out of his chest for possibly the first time in his whole life b/c he did not think gordon freeman ever wanted to fuck him, but here he is, using benreys pillow as an imitation of the real thing and jerking off in his bed

just turns right the fuck back around and goes into the bathroom and splashes some water on his face and stares down at his sudden boner

THANKS FOR READING ALL OF THIS B/C THIS ISNT EVEN GETTING INTO THE PISS STUFF THAT WEVE OBVIOUSLY BEEN THINKING ABOUT. SORRY FOR BEING LIKE THIS

[ticklishpeter]

𝐭𝐮𝐚 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬:

STRAP IN EVERYONE THIS IS A BUMPY RIDE

ok first of all :: here’s my ranking from least to most ticklish (and yes im including lila fuck off): allison, luther, ben, klaus, lila, vanya, five, diego!!!! like theyre all hella ticklish, don’t get me wrong, but khjdfs this is like based on how many spots they have tbh

a whole fckin novel under the cut tbh jhkgfsd

allison’s worst and perhaps only spot is her armpits???? she’s real giggly and v free and open about it!!!! squeals galore m8

luther’s legs??? like his whole legs?? and his feet. and like his neck but only lowkey;;; basically everything that wasn’t effected by the serum

well  um… ben’s dead. but he’s about as ticklish and squeaky as a dead boy could be!! he tries to keep his laughter silent bc he’s embarrassed about it 🥺 his tummy’s sensitive as heck but they all have to be real careful just in case they end up summoning something on accident hfwkjs, and his feet are also HELLA ticklish ok

so yeah, klaus’ hips being the WORST is a big sorta community-wide headcanon and i’m so super on board, but also his ribs?? especially the backs of them / his shoulder blades?? and his palms tbh?? he’s screamin 

lila’s ribs and inner thighs are like,, hyper sensitive?? but also her butt and tops of her feet? kjsdygh don’t ask me why. she’s also a big squealer and would definitely punch u successfully if u tease her about it ok she’s baby

another baby: vanya 🥺🥺🥺 another rly popular headcanon is that she gigglesqueaks at the slightest touch on her neck/under her chin/around her ears kfjhdgb and i absolutely love it but she also is so squirmy when she gets tickled basically everywhere ,, but only soft tickles bc hard ones overwhelm her lowkey

FIVE’S KNEES OKAY im ON THE BANDWAGON. scribbles or squeezes on or around his knees make him SCREAM BLOODY MURDER and he covers his face almost always bc one time klaus took a picture of his scrunched up red laughing face and he just,,, damn he really wishes he wasn’t in his 13 y/o body bc how ticklish he is just makes him feel like such a baby and he hates it. hiS ribs and armpits are also so so bad. also he’s a kicker for SURE

and diego… wowowow diego. ticklish evERYWHERE ok but he’s also the type to be like squealing and giggling “i’m not! i’m not!!!!” when someone teases him asking if he’s ticklish. he’s a VIOLENT THRASHER and even tho, again he’s ticklish everywhere, get his tummy or his sides??? ur DONE bro he loses his strength but just throws himself around and snorts a TON. he’s also super easily brought to tears and hiccupy cackles (honest to god i could do a whole post about lee!diego i love him so much)

diego's laughter is mostly silent but like you'll hear the occasional squeak or hiccup, which makes him cover his face bc embarrassment and tough boys don't squeak. bouncy shoulders and just trEMBLING w laughter uwu

luther honestly only lets allison tickle him sans revenge kjhdfs any other siblings that try?? theyre gettin grabbed and wrecked ok. but w allison, he just kinda giggles and really gently tries to squirm away uwu

lila’s teases, towards diego especially, are BRUTAL “aww what’s the matter, knife boy? is someone’s tummy a wittle tickwish?” and um,,, while he’s like trying not to break, she gets up real close to his face and gives him this fucking DEADLY teasy grin before wrecking him with pokes. all that combined makes him sNORT n break which lila laughs at and makes him blush even more kwfhjds

fivey uses his teleportation to his advantage,, he’ll sneak up on his siblings, squeeze their sides, and blink away in like seconds so he’s hard to catch,  and he’s so COCKY about it all ,, unless he’s being tickled of course, he gets totally powerless

vanya didnt get like any tickles up until like,,,, maybe just this last season lmao but she would always notice the kids having tickle fights or grace giving them lil cheer up pokes so i have in my mind that sissy was the first to tickle her (sissy prob just touched her neck a little too soft and vanya just melted)

and now the ones who tickle vanya the most are deFINITELY allison and klaus

five turns into a fish outta water when his knees are squeezed lmao (aj reference not intended),,, but i just picture his WHOLE body fucking FLAILING and him just kicking like a kid having a tantrum

diego and five both curse up STORMS and hurl HELLA death threats when theyre tickled like,,, anywhere.  perhaps bc they always insist theyre not ticklish lmao and so they gotta keep that big boy facade goin somehow (but yk it’s hard when ur a giggle puddle)!!!!

i can just hear them both cackling and squeaking before “YOU FUCKING BASTAHAHAHHHJKSDBDR” and klaus being all teasy n shit like “i dont think i caught that, i’m fucking who now??”

which ofc brings me to my headcanon that klaus, along with allison, are the biggest lers of the family tbh (which is wild bc klaus is my fav and usually with my favs i’m like ✨ur a lee✨ but idk man) tHEY’RE BOTH JUST SO TEASY

let’s face it tbh allison’s basically the mom of the group so she’s def the one that’s giving them tickles if she can tell theyre upset but also so frickin mean in a tickle fight ksdgjy

and i know klaus would just be ruthless as a ler,, and he finds tickles fun and almost relaxing in a way (except for his hips; that’s a death wish) which ofc is no fun for his siblings who wanna torture him hwkjsfg

klaus usually wins tickle fights if theyre one on one??? unless it’s against ben,, which sucks bc he’s the only one who could even wreck ben so to lose to a ghost? humiliating kshdjg,  ben can tickle ppl while he’s possessing them by just tickling the body he’s in lmao so yeah he gets klaus a LOT

but as of late, klaus will give ben a few pokes and tickles just to hear his noises bc theyre just,, SO FUNNY to him�� which usually results in a slap in the face and hella revenger from benjamin LOL

some of them have little things they just repeat when theyre getting tickled and laughing so hard like,,,  diego just strainingly goes “nonononono,” lila squeals “shitshitshitshit,” five just grunts expletive after expletive: “fuckingshitihateyoufuckfuck,” and vanya honestly kinda sounds like “sksksksks” bc she starts saying stop but she doesn’t want it to stop so she’s stops herself kdufsjh

you'd think that luther would be able to get away from tickles super easily but all of his strength is just LOST like immediately ,,, and when it's not, he doesn't want to hurt anyone so he just takes it and rolls around so tickle fights have been pretty comical lmao

highkey tho tickle fights between diego and lila are actually like really tough matches??? like there's never really a clear winner bc theyre both just so stubborn and ticklish and would never admit defeat

ray tickled allison ALL the time bro like the precious couple they always were meant to be and ray always took so much pride in the fact that he wasn’t ticklish at all lmaoooo

baby talk teases frickin DESTROY fivey tbh they annoy him so much but they just make him all the more giggly

ok those are all my general ones that came to me right just now at 9:47pm on august 9 2020 lmao

[skinks]

went and maggie having a happy marriage/great sex life really makes me sad that richie never had that & i think they would be too. like imagine in his post-coming out special hes telling a story like "so this guy comes in me, pulls out and leaves immediately while im lying there with blue balls bc he couldnt even give me a courtesy handie. and the worst part is i saw him again!" and theyre in the audience like nooooooo where did we go wrong :(

Oh noooOOOO RICHIE, oh they’d feel so bad. This is really breaking my heart because like, they probably really disapprove of his shitty ghost-written comedy and it causes a lot of friction because they know that’s not who he is, deep down, and he just won’t tell them why he’s so much more subdued and hunched.

So when he gets them tickets to come see his big new comeback they’re excited, because he’s been a lot happier recently. More like the funny little boy that seemed to fade away around age 18 or so. And then he comes on stage and gives this hilarious, honest, fucking brutal breakdown of exactly why he’s been so miserable the past 20 years (give or take a few details about clowns), and Went and Maggie are like. Gripping hands tight and looking at each other every so often, horrified. Because even though they thought of themselves as pretty progressive for their time, there’s still that blinkered approach as to just how easy it was for them to get together and get married and live how they wanted.

After the show they’re hugging him between them even though he’s bigger and taller than them both these days, saying stuff about how they wished they’d known ways to make it easier for him and that they’re sorry if he ever felt like he couldn’t come to them with his problems. It’s good for Richie to hear that even at 41 because the Derry amnesia had him almost resenting his mom and dad for so long. Feeling pathetic and embarrassed at how he struggled with something they found so easily so early on in their lives, y’know? But now he knows that the damage done by Pennywise and the societal prejudice it embodied, it had dug itself so deep he hadn’t even realised it was the true culprit, and he can start bridging the distance he put between himself and his parents!

honestly that’s the best thing about post-canon Losers, getting rid of It doesn’t just save kids from being murdered, it allows for EVERYONE to start trying to heal and to maybe fix the damage they unwittingly caused to other relationships. A “ripples in a pond” type deal

Maggie still asks him anxiously if he’s at least practicing better safe sex nowadays and Richie shrugs, “There’s no chance of either me or Eddie getting pregnant, if that’s what you mean.”

“You KNOW that’s not what I mean!”

Then Went’s like, “If you’re going to insist on telling everyone about the size of your Johnson, could you at least mention you get it from me?” and Richie’s like GOD DAD NOT AGAIN

[kingsofneon]

ayyy its me coming in here!!! i have no requests off the bat but uhhhh ok ok hear me out. acesabo but with like. a finger kink or something? like, long pretty fingers fingering the hell out of each other or just sensually sucking on it, idk, i'll let you decide. OR, more expansion on robinkoalasabo, blease?

look okay look im just. vibing with sabo/ace rn so i gotta talk abt them but real quick i love argumentative best friend/enemy / qpp koala/sabo and both of them liking robin, LMAO !!!!! bitch!!! that shit’s hilarious. robin i think would be uhh....unused to such honest attraction? yah sabo’s a lying liar but there’s a difference in his...sarcasm vs his “I’m telling a lie so you don’t know the truth I dont want to tell you”, is what i think. so idk in what i set up i guess we have ko/ro first and Kinda girlfriends (im.....ded for fro/bin tho soz so absoLUTE we have not-yet-together-kinda-feelings-but-complicated-bc-trauma robin/franky + bc theyre not together the...flattery + enjoyment of koala’s personality and company...) friends w/ benefits didn’t-really-date but like each other a lot. and koala so sunny and happy buuut also spending Lots of time with robin - just hanging out but also sexy fun times - and sabo’s like “no I’m not sulking shut the fuck up” (but he’s totally sulking because he Liked robin too, she was someone he respected highly and she! knows! luffy! he doesn’t say anything to her about it bc he’s guilty as fuck but. boii wants those strawhat stories and he can’t sneak them out of her with koala taking up all of her attention.) 

koala picks up on his grumpy mood but just figures he’s being a dick abt smth, but robin’s like nah look, pattern, and koala’s like oh. OH? 

idk what they do but w/e we be vibing with nsfw, which is sabo’s. sabo’s fucking fingers man. the tensile strength. BUT ALSO he’s not very delicate, not very good with flexibility, so robin,,ho fuck boi. when against koala the dichotomy of the roughness vs that clever stroking, but then also bRO im thinking about sabo viewing masturbation etc. pretty clinically and also Be Careful Of Strength, ain’t gotta lot of time to jerk off when you’re running the revolution u know.

so like the first time robin tops im fucking laughing. koala’s probably just as rough/efficient as he is but robin...robin can unlace him in like a minute flat and figures out real quick that sabo likes being edged. the first time robin touches his prostrate..........boi. 

anyway omfg that was longer than i thought so hand kink + sabo/ace

FIRST 

if you haven’t read.......second chances (https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495015?view_full_work=true).........what are you doing. look at this shit:

“You want to watch me jerk it like this?” The buckle rattled with Ace's gesturing, and Sabo's eyes immediately fixated darkly on the belt. “Then I uh, I get to make a weird request too.”

“If you must,” Sabo replied, sounding the exact opposite of beleaguered as he discretely wiped the spit off his palm. Ace cleared his throat.

“Put on your gloves.”

Ace refused, refused to look away from the devious delight spreading across Sabo's stupid face.

“Oh Ace,” he purred, those damn fucking gloves appearing in his hands out of nowhere (did he have them tucked in his pockets this entire time?). With deliberate motions, Sabo smoothed the leather over every finger, and flexed, like he was about to whip out one of his ryusoken moves. “Are you sure you just want me to jerk off in these?”

“Well if you've got any lube tucked away,” Ace shot back, “now's the time to pull it out, put on a good show.”

Sabo's consequent exhale was nowhere near the flippant-and-suave chuckle he had clearly been aiming for. Smugly, Ace counted a point in his own favor before dropping onto his back and finally—finally—undoing his pants. As his own belt fell with heavy thumps to both sides, Ace brushed aside all the pesky cloth, and applied pressure in earnest with a sigh of pleasure.

and this

And boy was it a view. The gloves were incredibly well-worn, molded so tightly to Sabo that Ace could see the full articulation of his fingers' every curve, every bend. The buttery leather, lighter in color at the fingertips, glided over Sabo with the barest whisper of friction. Ace could see his grip change, pressure shifting as he held himself tighter and tighter, grunting in frustration.

“Can I take these off?” Sabo finally requested with a hint of a whine. Ace suddenly thought of Marco, and how he might smirk at that tone, if he was here. “It's not working for me.”

“It's working fine for me,” Ace did his best to leer, thoroughly enjoying his own bare hand's capacity for friction. Sabo made another sound of protest, and Ace gave in with a snort. “Fine. Just one hand.”

“It's all I need.” The right glove disappeared as fast as it came, and Sabo arched high and satisfied into his own hand, now skin-to-skin. He obligingly let the gloved hand remain in play though, skimming teasingly up and down, grinning sharply at Ace's open mouth. “Hey,” he ordered, “go faster.”

AND THIS!

“Anything you want,” was Ace's breathless answer. He didn't stop, even sped up, gripping hard and fast and chasing that finale. “You can have it from me.”

“I would chain you down,” Sabo snarled, practically a threat, only the blade was turned wholly inward toward himself. Like he was daring Ace to give him absolution. “I would bend you 'til you're ready to break, and keep you there for hours. I would make you beg for release, but deny you anyways. I would see your skin dark with my bruises, I would, I would—”

Ace's hands twisted hard against his binds, wanting genuinely to be free of them for the first time since they started this—and Sabo's reaction was instantaneous. A flex of haki into his fingers, and Sabo was slicing through the leather of his belt, letting Ace loose with an expression of terror.

And Ace dragged himself across the bed until he could cup Sabo's cheek in his clean palm and pull Sabo into a biting, filthy kiss. He was still hard as sin, and thrust forward into Sabo's hands to let him know—

“Anything,” he panted into Sabo's mouth, meaning it with every fiber of his being. He didn't mean for Sabo to cut open the belt; he had just wanted, so badly, to feel Sabo's touch. “You have me.”

bitch. bitch. 

idk just gonna write some prompts bc this looks long

sabo + jerking ace off while wearing his gloves + barely washing them (to ace’s embarrassment) bc he claims he likes having evidence of ace. they’re usually kept for when he’s at home tho, sabo’s gross but not that gross ;p (and ace would probably die LMAO)

 SORRY BUT THE POST I JUST REBLOGGED ABT HOLDING YOUR THUMB DOWN TO HAVE NO GAG REFLEX UM. Ace says he wants to try it but it feels weird so sabo’s like. ;) okay and runs his fingers over ace’s mouth, tapping and instructing him to hold his thumb down. tracing his teeth and teasingly not dipping his fingers down low enough, till ace glares at tries to argue smth like “this is not testing the trick” but that’s when sabo presses on his tongue, down his throat, and ace half-chokes on it. sabo just like ‘not like you have much of a gag reflex anyway’

was thinking abt this the other day but ace doing sabo’s nails and then being like dont ruin them! no touching until they’re dry but sabo’s like but idk when they’ll be dry???? bc he’s never used nail polish before and ace is like :) better not touch then as he teases sabo

ace ofc painted them gold and red bc theyre His Colours and the next day when they’re dry and pretty sabo spends ages running his hands against ace’s skin, fascinated and worshipping of how pretty ace is

before they started dating and when they were bad at handling alcohol, sabo kissing ace’s knuckles made that boi CATATONIC, his wrist would also make ace bolt bc Horny, he’s fucked when sabo kisses his wrist it’s just too...intimate. 

 headcanons, headcanons, they’re both pretty calloused in different ways...ace is like rope burns and shit, longer across his palm and knuckles, sabo has palm base bc of his pipe, but they’re confined, and then on his fingertips bc of dragon claw. AGAIN thinking about mr fast fuck brutality here like the STRENGTH in that boy’s hands wtf

ace’s hands have more scars, sabo has more callouses/micro-deposits bc he knows hand to hand/doesn’t start with a DF. 

idk where im going with that last one guess it’s just headcanons abt hands.  

that’s all fox, i like the number eight and i have so many other asks to do lmao

[iridescentides]

🔥 + any hot takes/thoughts/unpopular opinions about Glee, A:tLA, and Umbrella Academy bc you reblog a lot of them and I love those shows

AH thank you so so much for sending this! i will try to limit myself bc i have a lot of opinions okay

Glee

i could go on and on about glee bc there are 12 billion things to say (and the show is super long). but i think my most controversial opinions are:

i dont ship finchel or klaine. at all.

i can explain. i have a love/hate (but mostly hate) relationship with rachel as a character. sometimes i feel bad for her bc its clear shes struggling and insecure and shes a flawed female character which we need to appreciate. BUT she is just so unbearably annoying, selfish, and awful to everyone around her, and season 5 was the point where i finally made a decision. i dont like her. similarly, i hate finn bc he is overglorified by the other characters on the show, without any actions supporting it. they all say that finn is their leader, that hes the nicest guy ever, and praise him like a hero when in reality, he calls people slurs, outs them in the hallway, cheats on his girlfriends, and just overall acts like a douche towards anyone he doesnt immediately understand or relate to or wanna fuck. they all SAY hes amazing, but his actions just do not support that at all, and thats bad writing imo. i think because those characters are awful, their relationship is a colossal mess, and i think if i had to choose a definitive least favorite point for them, it would be when finn beat brody up for dating rachel. like what did the show want us to appreciate about that??? thats not romantic at all!!! thats disgusting and a sign that finn needs help. physically threatening people who date your exes? who does that??? and we’re supposed to think its cute bc he says “my future wife.” mhm. sure.

i hate klaine bc while i love kurt, i think blaine is awful to him. blaine relies heavily on having a sense of power over kurt, and this is even openly explored in one of the later episodes, but not resolved well imo. from the moment they met and got together, blaine was using his power and standing as head of the warblers to subtly make kurt feel lesser. he liked feeling like he held some sort of power in the relationship. then, when he goes to new york and gains weight and thinks of himself as less attractive, he gets angry and jealous of kurt bc he wants to be the “hot” one in the relationship, and always considered himself as such. if you are comparing yourself to your partner in that way, please break up with them and learn how to feel complete by yourself. blaines insecurities repeatedly fucked up their relationship, and i never have and never will ship them. the fact that they last minute decided to get married, ignoring their glaring issues with living together and teamwork in general, due to social pressure to crash brittanas wedding was absolutely ridiculous and a bullshit wrap up to their story.

A:TLA

okay so i know everyone is having fun rn joking about how “zukka nation has risen” but i honestly dont see it and never will. i dont get where the fandom has just decided this year to prioritize a ship that gets no real exposure, no buildup, and basically a two episode arc in terms of trust and teamwork. i recently saw a post talking about how theres not much fan content for mai/ty lee, who have an actual solid friendship (and ty lee literally risked her life to save mai), but theres tons of fans pushing zukka and acting like its THE ship we should all be shipping, showing the general bias fandoms have for mlm over wlw. something to think about. ive been zutara trash since i was 11 years old, so needless to say, i would pick them over zukka any day.

piggybacking off of the weird superiority complex people have for shipping zukka, i have always been annoyed by sokka stans in general? just to be clear, i love sokka, and i dont think there is anything wrong with loving him! but i HATE how people who consider sokka their favorite character act like theyre special for that? people are always crying that hes “underappreciated” and that hes so much smarter and more capable than anyone else. and i personally have not seen a single person criticize sokka, when ive seen at least small bits of hate thrown at each character. my point here is, loving sokka is a super popular opinion to have, and literally everyone loves sokka! so when people act like theyre the only one who truly appreciates sokka it really bugs me bc like. it truly doesnt make you special. everyone has a different favorite atla character but i pretty much only see sokka stans with this odd superiority complex, acting like theyre so rare for loving a super loveable character.

TUA

idk if this is an unpopular opinion or not, but the show would be unwatchable without klaus. hes pretty much everyones favorite character, we all see ourselves in him and we root for him and we laugh at him, and while i agree with the sentiment that he gets a disproportionate amount of attention for how ultimately irrelevant he is to the plot, i literally would not care about tua at all without him.

on the flipside of that, i want to love allison so badly, but she gets no time or attention or development at all. her main traits are inc*st and missing her child. she gets nothing beyond that, and we dont know as much about her as the rest of the siblings. it hurts my heart to see the only woman of color in the family being treated so obviously like a side character in an ensemble cast. im really hoping we see more of her in s2.

thank you so much for sending these!!! i obviously love these shows a lot, im just picky about these things.

Send Me a 🔥+ a Topic, and I’ll Tell You My Honest Opinion About It!

[1eos]

 @jungcircleo​ wanted me to look at dk’s birf chart nd *rookie announcer voice* WE’RE LIVE!

and..........what the actual hell? as usual idk this dude BUT HIS LACK OF EVERY ELEMENT BUT AIR WHAT IN THE WORLD??????? ND THE AQUARIUS STELLIUM IM GONNA SCREAM

ok ok ok ok so air dominant ppl.....sociable, weird, fake intellectuals...etc. esp bc all of his air placements are in aquarius....aquarians r the peak of hipster fake intellectual culture. theyre so weird nd proud of it. tell an aquarius they aren’t original nd their heads would literally explode. nd to have no water, earth, or fire......bro i cant even imagine a person like this. having none of the other elements means he’s not super emotional, he’s not grounded, AND he’s kinda floppy for lack of a better word. 

his moon IS in cancer so good news he’s not the standard ‘my god complex gets in the way of my emotions’’ aquarius. the bad news is......its a cancer moon. cancer moons are so fucking weird bc they honest to god need attention (good or bad) or they will fizzle away into dust. 

\cancer moon men can be really warm nd i think its a good placement so that they actually wash their ass nd cry BUT it makes their ego sooooooooooooo sensitive. nd cancer moons (like all water moons) love to be the victim. even if theyre in the wrong. ESP when theyre in the wrong. like...cancer moons will assume ure mad at them bc u texted back 4 minutes slower than usual then get mad at YOU for being mad at THEM even tho......u werent. just a lot of drama

nd ANOTHER AQUARIUS VENUS! say it with me class 🗣CHEATER!!!!!!!!!!!🗣  aquarius suns have commitment issues anyways but to double it with an aqua venus too? story time: met an aqua girl on tinder. when i was busy she would text me non stop. when i finally showed interest nd got invested she dropped off. that’s ALL AQUARIANS. idk what it is with them.........they just move on to the next one the moment things get even a lil serious. but they also crave companionship -_____________-

wait. oh god not the aqua mercury 😭😭😭😭 mercury is the planet of communication nd aqua mercury means this dude always got an opinion and/or something weird to say. aqua mercury ppl have to say off the wall shit. they cant help it. this dude will argue the color of the sky bc aqua mercury ppl just cant AGREE! THEY CAN’T JUST SAY YES. THEY HAVE TO ADD SOME SHIT ND THEY HAVE TO ARGUE. they fucking survive on irritating ppl by starting impromptu debates

libra mars..............OHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! LIBRA MARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mars is anger/aggression nd u would think libra mars ppl  are harmless right? like all the other air mars dont have hands nd all they can do is run their mouth but libra mars can have some serious tempers. like for the most part this dude wants to get along w ppl (even tho all his aquarius placements makes him insufferable on some level cabuz he thinks he’s always right) nd he may even be a bit of a doormat bc libra placements would rather be a pushover rather than being hated........but. BUT! when libra mars ppl snap. they fucking SNAP. that dude from  got7 that threw the laptop? he has a libra mars. libra mars ppl r  the living embodiment of that post that goes ‘arent u tired of being nice? dont u wanna go apeshit?’ watch out he might have hands aklffklallk

overall this is a talkative dude that always has some shit to say nd he pretends to be cool calm nd collected but inside everything hurts his feelings nd if he ever gets pushed over the edge........somebody gone die

[gg-astrology]

🥺😔☀️💓❤️💓

a rambly all-over-the-place personal note! Incase you just want to hear from me and talk to me!! I know i’ve been gone for a while so if any followers old/new wants to hear what I actually say when Im not answering posts, here it is! 💓❤️💓 

the main point so you don’t have to see any of the mess: any asks that talks to me like im google will be deleted! 

note: the main part of this isn’t even about the above so if u’re looking for drama or me angsting you may not find it here!! i think i sound more like im fatigued and on my last brain cells.. talking about everything and being v sappy and mellow.. so!!! 💓❤️💓 no drama. not here! not today! 

ok now, consider:

what do u guys think about me just taking it easy... i dont know if you’ve been here for a while or for long.. but I usually do pretty detailed research posts?? about topics like moon phase in astrology, basics on essential dignitaries, etc. 

Astrology ‘topics’... stuff like ‘what is x chart what does it mean’ or ‘what is x concept how does it work’ -- not about placements usually!!! 💓❤️💓Asks about placements I just answer for fun from my inbox.. but posts I actually make.. those are the type of things!!! 💓❤️💓

And well.. I just came back.. not in the mindset right now.. so i was thinking.. would u be ok/interested if i take a break from those posts and maybe post more idol astrology stuff?? nothing serious, I just want to have fun and talk about placements and gush over people who may have similar placements to us and how good they are + how we can learn from them... 

Its just fun stuff?? very light-hearted (dont talk to me about crying through them sometimes, bc theyre so good even when i see harsh aspects/them going through manifestation of that throughout their careers) -- idk!! I just want to maybe talk about girls for a while and like, ask people to love girls and support/appreciate girl groups and asian soloists and artists... 

idk!! just a thought.. like.. i’ll still answer astro stuff and maybe i’ll slip astro posts in there as well.. 90% of my blog is still main astro stuff.. just that 10% maybe i’ll do more idol readings.. it lifts my spirits and i like talking about them!! i know its a niche in tumblr, esp the kpop gg astro stuff.. but like... girls...!!! and seventeen members (im nearly done oh my god theres 3 more left!!!)

I know i put a lot of effort into the bangtan readings bc theyre like-- the semi between my usual intense stuff and the light-hearted ones so im-- probably not gonna touch them yet (for now)  -- I always have high expectations for them because they have to be a certain Standard. There’s alot of great bangtan astro posts out there -- part of that is also v pressuring. But another part is that I want to contribute to something in the community as well! That is like, new and welcomed and good and Not Bad... so... I’m holding off bc I have to have like, a week to actually write, edit, re-edit, check myself before I (usually) publish them.. so... this is ur warning my bts inner readings wont be coming out soon!! 

im just talking about gg stuff -- or other idols, thinking about twice and gfriend and oh my god.... girl groups...

I rmb I used to do it to promote solo artists that might not have gotten alot of attention as well.. I still have drafts about Bolb4.. now consider: younha... also consider: xiao zhan, wang yibo... oh my god... but what if-- idk!!! idk!!!!!!

Anyways I just want to let u know whats been on my mind!!! I honestly dont really know? I posted the bangtan answer today (with a warning beforehand) and AS SOON AS I PUBLISHED 4 people left -- to be honest its pretty funny,,, its kinda funny right?? i think its funny,,, like kpop repellent,, but also i Get it!!! its not for u its ok dont take this social media thing so seriously... its fine i do it all the time too, dont feel guilty over blocking or unfollowing someone - do it as soon as you feel uncomfy tbh its a safe place for u make it ur safe spot!!

But!! Yeah!! 💓❤️💓 Idol things, thoughts? 💓❤️💓 

And this is not related but I was looking at old questions/asks in my inbox (some that ive alrdy answered but its still there -- like 6 asks? so thats... 6 out of the current 122 asks oof) and people are So Nice and So Polite to me!!!! amazing!!! fortunate!!!! One lucky bitch!!!!! Thats me!!!! Im the lucky bitch, who?? people are just so courteous towards when they request or asks for something?? wow---

Its only like, half way in the middle of my old asks that I realize once its more mainstream astro ppl start sending asks in like im google search... rip anyone who does that i deleted the ask bc i have a faq.. my only rule is that be nice.. not playing by the rules!!!!! 

Its also a little introspective to think about it now.. how back then when I didn’t realize it was happening I carried through and answered them anyways bc like... atleast people were asking?? they’re curious?? right?? keep the public fed! there’s people out there who does enjoy my actual answer than the ask itself...but like... now that i’m back and Refreshen: any asks that talks to me like im google will be deleted. I’ll quote this and put it up before the read more so thats the main meat of this long rant!! 💓❤️💓

basically what im saying about all this is: don’t let people treat you that way, or anyway you don’t feel absolutely positively happy about. I’m still keeping some asks that I do want to answer/I think can be turned into great points. But marie-kondo yourself, you don’t deserve to be treated like someone’s encyclopedia, dictionary or google!!!!!

they don’t really care, and it doesn’t really matter if you answer or not -- bc they can just type in the same thing to other astrologer out there and mayb someone will hit it and answer for them. So!!!! dont compromise, delete anything that doesn’t treat u like human. Bc u’re not a bot!!!! Do better!!! This is from future nita to past nita!!! Do better!!! This is why u burnt out and went awol for like a month!!!!!!!! Dont let this happen again or get into the habit, cry to ur friends!!! Ask ur beta for help!!!!!!! Add some people in as ur admin so they can clearly tell u what is right and whats wrong!!!!! dummie you’re too soft and kind!!!!! stop making excuses for others!!!!!!! do better in 2020!!!!!

So this is my rambling over!!! Answered 42 asks in my queue, know that around 30 of them have already been posted. That’s 72 done today!! Not to mention the 30 yesterday -- I was v dumb and didn’t close the ask box, thus I had +10 asks in my inbox today but its ok!!!!!!! Let the people Speak!!!! I’ll post this PSA now and go I hope u enjoy hearing from me even if I’m just rambling -- love u!! take care of urself!!! i hope this helps or entertain anyone who’s looking to know me better or hear some words from me personally!!!! this is me, signing out!!! 

[nobodies-png]

tbh i think square/disney really wanted the organization to be bad™ and irredeemable™ but they shot themself in the foot after they sprinkled in the various moments where its established that the individuals of the org arent inherently evil. which means that them having ienzo be a child originally makes it strange to have such malicious hate aimed at him in the same series where characters are expected to grow and learn and sympathize. but idk lol

h o n e s t l y ? y E Ah

im taking this chance to ramble under the cut , wh e e z e. Warning for KH3 spoilers and Mod Demyx rant rant

in my humble ass opinion, it really just feels like Nomura had a bunch of cool ideas in general, but then the train went rogue and they started adding a shit ton of plot twists (that they’d later have to explain and make relevant to the main plot) for the sake of continuing the saga and milking more money bc KH was part of so many people’s childhoods

like, it’s one of my fave games and sagas ever but to be honest, i’d love for some other company to fucking remake the entire plot without the pretense of “we gotta be kid friendly bc Disney is here uwu”. Like, you can’t really be dramatic and make any important events when every character is just gonna come back, only killing off those that you don’t know how to continue.

and it’s such a weird fucking ? amalgamation of stuff too ? not even the fact that we’re mixing talking animals,disney princesses and final fantasy shit into it, but like - sometimes it shows scenes that are too dark for Disney and sometimes it just skims over shit that it should have some proper closure because o h it’s too dark for a kid’s game. And then even deeper shit is hinted in the novels and manga bUT TYING BACK TO MY PREVIOUS ANSWERED POST, YOU CAN’T EXPAND ON LORE TO MAKE YOUR CREATION MORE STABLE LIKE THIS - IF YOU WANT TO EXPLAIN OR EXPAND UPON SOMETHING, HAVE B A L L S AND DO IT IN THE GAME, WHICH IS THE MAIN FOCUS 

Like, in KH3 they wanted everyone to get redeemed and “close off a chapter of this story” but honestly ? it was fucking rushed and done in a pretty shitty way, in my opinion. 

Ienzo just shows up wanting to help and there’s no repercussions to his actions as a nobody, he’s just like “uwu hi” and everyone’s too caught up in Sora having a phone to even care that this was one of the guys that gave them h e l l in Castle Oblivion. Same with the other apprentices, Aeleus and Dilan get no spoken lines, just a line explaining how they also wanted to be better tossed in all carelessly. That’s their redemption. 

And don’t get me wrong, I fucking adore Zexion/Ienzo, he was my crush as a kid, but ? he’s just used to show that Nobodies can be chill and they’ve been all controlled by a bigger evil, as well as part of Ansem’s own redeeming arc instead of having his O W N redeeming arc. He’s virtually useless despite all the protagonism they gave him in KH3, cause sure he calls Sora to let him know shit and he’s supposedly “working on Big Stuff for the Good Guys(tm)”, but all of this work and character development happens off-screen. Same with Vexen/Even - and he at least gets like two scenes showing that he actively works in the shadows to redeem himself. 

And I know it’s hard to make a game and they’ve been at it for a long fucking time and it requires a lot of shit but ? ? ? hONESTLY I DONT KNOW ABOUT YOU ALL BUT I PREFER TO GET A SOLID CLOSURE ON THE MAIN SHIT  AND THEN MAYBE GET MORE CLOSURE FOR LESS BUT STILL IMPORTANT GROUPS IN OTHER GAMES OR REMIXES SINCE THEYRE SUPER KEEN ON MAKING A SHIT TON OF SPIN-OFFS AND STUFF. LIKE, THAT SEEMS BETTER THAN HAVING A LOT OF SMALLER PLOTS JUST SPRINKLED THERE LIKE “WHOOPS AND THEY WERE ALL HAPPY AGAIN” 

cAUSE THEY DON’T EVEN STOP THERE. THEY TRY TO CLOSE A LOT OF SHIT, BUT THEN ADD A LOT OF VAGUE CRYPTIC SHIT FOR THE UPCOMING GAMES AND STORIES ? ? ? 

like I love the final battle part a lot because it’s ? ? ? so fucking badass and it’s the end of all this journey we’ve been on, it’s Sora vs Xenahort, it’s the light vs the darkness, it’s Master Eraqus’ legacy vs Xenahort’s army. 

but it’s just an easy cheap way to close off so much shit in a short time.

the sea salt trio ? reunited. the wayfinder trio ? reunited. the remaining Nobodies who still have no fucking backstories ? gone with a hint of “we’ll be back as good guys”. Like, they added fucking Ephemera as the “light from the past”, inviting the connection between the current timeline with KHux bUT THERE’S STILL NOTHING ON LAURIAM/MARLUXIA. AND THEN THERE’S A FUCKING CUTSCENE OF VENTUS HUGGING A FUCKING CHIRITHY LIKE, YOURE NOT EXPLAINING NOR HELPING ANYONE, NOMURA.

LIKE THE SECRET CUTSCENE IMPLIES 2 THINGS : NEW CHARACTERS (FROM RIKU’S POINT OF VIEW, SINCE HE’S WATCHED BY YOZORA) AND THE COME BACK OF THE TWEWY FRANCHISE WHOSE INVOLVEMENT HAD BEEN COMPLETELY IGNORED AND JUST ABANDONED SINCE DDD. SURE, DREAM EATERS WERE HELLA IMPORTANT AND THERE’S SLEEPING WORDS THERE. AND THERE’S IMPORTANT SHIT GOING ON WITH VANITAS AND THE UNVERSED. BUT ALL WE GOT WAS A DREAM EATER SUMMONING, LIKE 5 UNVERSED ENEMIES AND MORE UNNECESSARY CONFUSION

Like I get it that KH3 was supposed to be the ending of some things and the beginning of other new things and I get that there were a lot of setbacks and things involved, but even with it’s amazing graphics and fun gameplay, it’s still another trainwreck regarding plot. But we all just keep eating it up because we’re desperate to know how it ends and bc childhood nostalgia keeps us here at gunpoint

also i’m mad that out of all KH girls, only Aqua got her time to shine. Like sure, you can argue and say that Kairi took the spotlight after saving Sora again and being a good 70% of Sora’s strength, but as usual she was thrown back into her spot as “princess in distress”, with her training and character development happening off-screen in a place that conveniently has no effect to the current events. And speaking of training, she just immediately becomes besties with Axel despite all the shit they went through with him trying to kidnap her and whatnot. And sPEAKING OF AXEL, HE GOT WAY MORE DEVELOPMENT THAN ROXAS OR XION OR KAIRI OR AQUA HERSELF

AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING CAUSE AQUA GOES THROUGH A LOT OF SHIT IN THIS GAME - She finally succumbs to darkness, she goes out of it, she saves Ven, reunites with Terra and after sO MANY FUCKING YEARS, she’s back on the realm of light. And that moment when she asks where they are and they tell her she’s back home and she raises her head to look at the sun and she cries ? ? that made me S H I V E R and TEAR UP MYSELF - but still, after all of that she goes to pretty much doing nothing while Axel here goes through a keyblade training, seeing Kairi as Xion, making ammends with his best friend, reuniting with his two adopted kids after so much shit and hinting anOTHER SUBPLOT WITH HIM, ISA AND A “SECRET GIRL” FRIEND THEY HAD.

BUT FROM XION WE ONLY GET THE PLOT CONVENIENT COMEBACK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BATTLE SO SHE CAN REUNITE WITH HER FRIENDS. A BIT OF INNER ANGST HERE AND THERE AND BOOM IT’S OVER SHE’S HAPPY NOW. 

AND NAMINE ? DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED. SHE’S GONE FOR SO LONG, ONLY SHOWING UP AS A STAR, MENTIONED OFF HAND BY KAIRI AND THEN SHE FINALLY GETS HER DESERVED LIFE IN THE ENDING CUTSCENE WHEN RIKU COMES TO PICK HER ASS UP. (im also mad that everyone got a happy/bittersweet ending except Vanitas and Repliku but that’s just me being sad aBOUT MY SONS)

sO LONG STORY SHORT :

I hate that this entire saga is a wreck but it still has me grabbed by the balls. Like I bought the KH special edition PS4 just to play when KH3 came out

[linos-teeth]

1/2 Mmm mood yep ;') but to answer, i've been alright, just tired and anxious bc well i've just came home but i already have to leave tomorrow at 7:30AM w/ my little brother- alone on the train for the first time but heyy at least i'm going somewhere i'm used to and where my family's already at so im alright :') but shsh dont worry :( i feel ya tbh,,, anyway abt my fav skz songs!! Well i cant choose either so id say--

2/2 Voices, Insomnia, Hellevator, My Pace (theyre my favs bc i can relate so much to them?? Like wow-) and Get Cool bc it ALWAYS puts me in a good mood!! But every skz songs are my favs if im being honest ;') theses just hold a special place in my heart 😔❤️,, what about yours?? Also plz go ahead and ask all the random questions you want, im just bad at thinking of questions but yeah-- 💕

hi nonny!!!! i’m leaving in one and a half hrs and it’s some SCARY SHIT so idk when exactly i’ll be able to answer you next i hope that trip with your bro went well and you’re safe!!! look at us being brave at the same time i hope u grow to appreciate train rides bc boy i love them s o much it’s how i got to uni for 4 years so it kinda rly grew on me but that’s basically over now and fjkhsdfkjsfa bye trains i guess

these are all SO GOOD!!! i love all these so much ngl get cool needed a long time to grow on me but then they performed it like a lot before miroh and i watched all the fancams and i realised how happy it was and now i love it too! my top top top top faves must be like.....district 9, voices, young wings, i am you, my side, chronosaurus, mixtape 4 and also maze of memories kinda tbh miroh like.....this entire album i just love it so much i could put all these songs on my faves list mainly bc my boy does SO WELL in them i guess like fuck you cannot tell me miroh was not linos era he shone so brightly i want to cry now i’m so sorry

but yeah!! there are only like 3 songs i don’t like too much everything else i could basically listen to on repeat except maybe now bc my concert heartbreak is still fresh! ok now i go back to freaking out i’ll make like a post maybe when i arrive safely so you’ll know i’m still alive!! please take good care of yourself too ♥

[invasato]

Thoughts and feelings on the michael bay transformers movies

god okay so like its COMPLICATED GJFLHGJLFHJG

on one hand ill literally love any piece of transformers media u put in front of me but on the other i will destroy michael bay with my bare hands

ive considered making posts about the movies as i rewatch my way through them but scrapped that idea bc most of its been said before. bays writing is just,,,bad. like shitty things he does aside for a moment, he doesnt know how to make a clean story. his plot is everywhere, his emotional scenes fall flat, and if not for my connections and love for the characters prior to watching, i wouldnt have felt anything for them. like sam witwicky for example. fun character ig but i dont get any kind of emotional attachment to him other than “haha nice his last name is witwicky”. bay doesnt seem to know what the hell hes doing and its a miracle to me that his movies end in ways i can understand. im really glad travis knight is taking over for bumblebee but with bay being the producer im still Worried tbh. he completely fucked over a lot of characterizations and im mad about it. optimus went from “be strong enough to be gentle” to “give me your face” and all he does is murder and kill now and thats??not what i love his character for. hes always been written as a gentle leader, and a lot of ppl look up to him as a father figure. i get none of that from bays interpretation, and i hate it.

moving back to bays shittiness, hes just like. Genuinely shitty lmao. his black coded cybertronians are all gross caricatures, especially in the second movie wrt the twins (mudflap and skids), his take on drift has been regarded as racist (havent rewatched last knight yet personally), and then were taken into his questionable treatment of middle eastern people/poc in general and his obsession with the military. like he includes the military in every movie and u can just tell hes writing this shit and drooling over these guys ugh. half the time it barely makes sense to include the military tbh ik hes just kissing ass. hes also like,,,,,extremely creepy towards his women characters. mikaela in the first movie is 17 iirc, and theres a shitton of sexual shots of her, and then in age of extinction??i think it was?? theres an entire plot line and scene dedicated to an explanation of romeo and juliet laws wrt a guys underage daughter Being Involved with an adult man. and when theyre not being involved in creepy p//do stuff?? the women in his movies are basically sidelined. michael bay rot challenge. 

im also gonna attack this from an art standpoint for a sec: bay doesnt know the first fucking thing about making a movie look good. his cybertronians look like literal scrapheaps, all he does is blow shit up, and he uses the same goddamn shooting style for literally every fucking scene. watching his movies can be literally exhausting bc theyre so visually unappealing. im really hoping knight does smtng about that. we already get redesigns for the characters thank god, and looking at the laika films hes directed i have hope that everything else will at least look decent.

tl;dr this turned into an essay but overall bay movies are awful. i watch them bc transformers is my si and i want to know what ppl are talking about and know whats going on and etc, but i wouldnt recommend that unless youre going to be having discussions or are legit getting into transformers bc theyre just so honest to god unenjoyable and unfunny and uncool. even when im enjoying them im not, and even with a shitton of prior knowledge about transformers i have trouble telling whos who and what the hell im watching. 

if you would like to get into transformers tho, id be happy to recommend cartoons and comics!! and i may write a review of the bumblebee movie when it comes out, ill be seeing it on premier day ^^ the cartoons i genuinely love, and the comics are a little imposing but with a guide theyre easy to navigate! recent series have also had good trans/gay rep, its really exciting!! sadly tho idw comics are rebooting and the most prominent writers wrt this stuff arent getting rehired, so we have yet to see if the rep will be continued in the new comics :(